Sleep Deprived Podcast - Sleep Deprived Podcast #20

Episode Date: March 13, 2021

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Who's doing the intro? Uh, we could all give it a shot, like at the same time. One, two, three. Hey everybody, welcome back to the Sweet Retrival Podcast. We're on the 20th episode. Yeah, we've got a chat. You know I'll be with me. Ah!

Well, so, we've all said the intro, but now who's going to introduce the first topic? Do we all introduce the first topic? Lola Bunny. She got stiffed. Wait, excuse me? They stiffed her in that she's got no tits anymore. Oh, that's a shame. Yeah, she got the short end of the stick.

She got stiffed, you know? I mean, I'm not stiffed. I'm not stiff looking at it. You seem a little like you're mad about this. I'm a little upset. I'm just a little, I'm a little miffed, maybe. But there's no way on planet Earth I'm stiff looking at that. Look, here's the thing.

I think Lola Bunny deserves to be hot. Explain. I think Lola Bunny was a lot of people's awakenings in the sexual space, like me. And I think that Lola Bunny deserves to be hot because I cannot stand not jerking off to her. You could just look at the old ones. No. Old tapes. Bring out the VHS tapes.

I deserve better. I deserve better now. I've been keeping a VCR around for decades. And you know what? Forgive me if I want to see Lola Bunny's hot tits on Blu-ray. Have you heard of porn? Shut up, man. Shut up.

You've been keeping a VHS just to be able to watch the old space jam to see lola bunny yes yeah i'm sure there's a there's a market for that there's like a decent amount of people i'm sure japan kept pumping them out because i'd i've keeping up a stockpile of what of lola bunny no of vcrs oh yeah so that i could so that when mine breaks i just keep jerking off to lola bunny you think uh you think lola bunny you think she's ever had a pinworm what is what is that like a little a little creature inside of her what you're a freak man what do you. You're a freak, man. What do you mean I'm a freak?

She's a bunny. She's a bunny. I bet she's had a pinworm. You want a pinworm in her? You want her to put a pinworm in her? Is that what you want? I bet she's had ringworm before. Panda, when you see that episode of the show, My Magic School Bus, and they get really small

and they go in the body. Shut up! Sorry. No, it's okay. Okay. Wait, what were you saying about the Magic School Bus? You're into Vore is what I'm saying. Was. Was?

Former Vore. A former Vore man. I have a coin. What was it about Vore that ever what did you ever like about it look can we not talk about it wow this cuts deep yeah you seem a little uh you seem a little not over a little miffed well when i say let's let's move on you guys keep going viewers takeers, take hints. Take notes. Maybe you guys have a pinworm. Is that vaccine you guys took?

You got a robot pinworm inside of you. I got the microchip. 55515. That's what you gotta say. To do what? Look, I... Let it out man i think we start a formal letter a strongly worded letter to walt disney or whoever the fuck runs space jam warner bros and we say to warner, we go, you know what? I'm not going to take you turning my Lola Bunny and turning her into some child-friendly, PC, liberal, bullshit, Joe Biden, motherfucking rabbit, flanderized piece of shit amalgamation

of what she used to be. It's Joe Biden used to be i want my lola bunny with long legs long legs straight to joe biden's office he's gonna read this letter i want lola bunny to be as hot as possible and this is you know what this is this is just another thing that we look that we gloss over because of because the biden administration is in power you know yeah i mean like if you don't get your two thousand dollar stimulus how are you supposed to keep buying vhs exactly how am i gonna keep buying vcrs and vhs tapes of space the original space jam Joseph Biden is conspiracy theory. He doesn't want me to jerk off to Lola Bunny anymore, and it's obvious. I think I know of a way he can redeem himself.

How? He turns Warner Bros into Bang Bros. What does that mean? Yeah, I don't really understand. He turns Warner Bros. into Bang Bros. What? What does that mean? Yeah, I don't really understand. Yeah, I don't. It's an entirely different thing. No, you can turn all the little things into big boobied, big bootied things.

You want LeBron James to have a big boobie and a big boobie? Yes, I do. Name another Warner Bros. character you'd like to see with big tits. Donald Duck. Daffy. Bugs Bunny. Hell yeah. Wait.

Big Chungus with big boobs. Big Chungus. Big... Yeah. I like big titties. Yeah! I think another way Joe Biden could redeem himself is if he put you on a billboard in New York.

Well, I mean, corpse did get the billboard. I mean, it's kind of unfair, honestly, for you to dredge that up again. But I guess we'll talk about it. I saw the photo yesterday. I mean, we all saw it. It was there again, but I guess we'll talk about it. I saw the photo yesterday. I mean, we all saw it. It was there in New York City.

I didn't see it. Well, I refused to look since you lost it. I'm sorry. Is this was this a bit raw? Yeah, it was a bit raw. It's a bit raw. Oh, man. I'm so sorry. That's just how he likes it.

With Lola Bunny. Raw with Lola Bunny. I want smell-a-vision smeller I want to smell Lola bunny I think she smells like musk smells like she's a rabbit probably does smell like and she's always on the She's always on the field or the basketball. She's always working out. Sweat and shit and leather. I think she'd smell like

compost. From Minecraft? Is that what your brain associates when you hear the word compost? Yeah, everything's just Minecraft. Yeah, honestly, yeah. You know, because of Pokemon, I learned how to spell the word fly. What? That's not a hard word to spell.

No, because you can spell F-L-I-E. The average kid would do F-L-I-E, but I saw fly. Who? Because I wanted my children to fly. What average kid? Only you did that. Only you did that. You do not need Professor Oak to tell you that fly is not spelled.

Yeah, because Professor Oak isn't an English professor. Look, I know kids that were like, I didn't know how to spell fly. And I was like, I did. What? Did you spell Professor Oak like A-E-O-K-Y-W or something? I'm not the best speller. Me and Asher went over this a few times but I knew how to spell fly because of Pokemon. I'll be real.

I learned to speak and write because of Pokemon. Yeah, I learned what gender was when the guy was like, are you a boy or a girl? Then it clicked. I learned how to capture animals and shove them into tiny balls. Yeah. What the hell?

That's when i learned what the meatpacking industry was all about i read the jungle by ulysses whatever his fucking name was what was his name what's the name the guy that wrote the jungle uh ulysses s grant no that was the president was it ulysses s moore no no no it wasn't even ulysses ulysses S. Moore? No, no, no. It wasn't even Ulysses. Ulysses is nuts. Upton Sinclair, suck my nuts. Yeah, yeah. Upton Sinclair was a...

How many years ago was that? Was that like... What generation was he a part of? The third generation Pokemon? The silent. Yeah, it's The third generation Pokemon? The silent. Yeah, it's a generation two Pokemon. Gen one. Gen one hollow. Upton Sinclair.

Yo, you got a Teddy Roosevelt? That's like a gen one shiny mythic. First edition Abraham Lincoln. I just pulled it. I just pulled a hollow Hitler. Oh god. god Dude a full art stolen

No way PSA 10 Mussolini Woah Did Pokemon ever have a Have a hot Pokemon that they made less hot Like was Pikachu Did Pikachu ever have a wreck? Pikachu used to be hotter.

Did Pikachu ever squish his teeth together? Yeah, Pikachu had big boobs in 95. Pikachu had big boobs in 95. It's just like Lola Bunny, man. Oh, man. They always remove the tits. Oh, no, they did make Pikachu skinnier, though. Yep.

He used to be a chungus, dude. With the boobs. With the boobs. And they ruined it. Honestly. They do everything. Pikachu used to be a lot more cuddly. Like, if I had to choose between modern day Pikachu and 95 Pikachu, like, I don't know.

Pikachu 95 just seems like a sweetheart. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. I agree. Potter as well. I agree. What's the difference between Gen Z and millennials, guys? What's the deal?

I hate anyone who's not in my generation. They can all die. Well, what are you? Are you a millennial or a Gen Z? I think, aren't we all Zoomers? I think we're all Zoomers. You're a boomomer, Panda? Yeah, I'm old.

I hope you die. Why? Because you suck. Us old people have to work for your young, lazy asses. And this is what we get? You're actively ruining my life. I work in coal mines

so you can play on that TikTok and fucking fortnite they're gonna make a new pokemon game and it's just generation z generation millennials like well they have x and y the pokemon company comes out with uh gen z pokemon and it's just biting commentary on how phones have torn the family unit apart. It's a bunch of Pokemon with a hunchback and arthritis. Well, we would give you a random encounter here, but the Zigzagoon is off gaming.

He's playing fucking Candy Crush on his iPhone. He's doomscrolling on Twitter. He's doom scrolling on Twitter. He's doom scrolling. Dealing with crippling anxiety because of Instagram and how many likes he's getting on Instagram. That's an instant KO.

That's how it's done. Sometimes the Pokemon that you choose to battle with are just like you know what never mind they don't even battle anymore they just show each other like they just show each other like really bad tweets that they've made from the past they just dig for dirt on their Twitter account. So Mewtwo, what was this tweet you made back in 2011?

Mewtwo loses half of their experience. What did Mewtwo say? Mewtwo has fainted Mewtwo has fallen to public trial uh oh here come the kpop profile pictures that's a status effect stands for a status effect

it's like parallels yeah so basically fuck millennials fuck millennials fuck you guys Stands for a status effect. It's like parallels. Yeah, so basically, fuck millennials. Fuck millennials. Fuck you guys. Yep. Yeah, fuck them. The world sucks.

Fuck you, pussy. Little bitch. They're the people that ruined Lola Bunny. They are. I bet they are. I bet they hired some millennial in warner brothers that was like wore glasses and had a star had a twitter account with like 10 000 followers and was verified and they're they were like up on their high horse and they're like no more tits boom lola bunny not hot anymore the only millennials i can tolerate are the

ones that listen to the sleep deprived podcast so true so true did you guys know that the uh the first sentence ever said by a monkey was give orange me give eat orange me eat give me eat give me eat orange give me you i remember that in planet of the apes as caesar said it that was the really smart gorilla right the coco coco yeah wasn't that coco yeah was it actually coco that said that she like pulls out her fingers and they're like oh she's talking she said orange is sus. Orange, me, give eat orange, me eat. Give me eat, give me eat orange, give me you. Just Caesar present for the birth of his

first born child. Give me eat orange. I'm in love with the cocoa. Oh my god, that's an old song. Yeah, I don't like that. I hate that song. I'm in love with the cocoa. I kind of hate that you brought that

up, Panda. That was not really cash money of you. Why? What are you going to do? Teach us to Dougie next? No, but I'm going to teach you how to wit. Watch me nae nae. Dude, he's in jail now. What? Silento's in jail now what what silent toes in jail why they saw that photo of him with his asshole wide open and they threw him in jail is that a

real thing you're talking about the mythbusters guy no what what the mythbusters guy did goatsy what is what what are we talking about? That's when you spread your asshole open and take a picture of it. I think the sound... You guys didn't know this? The sound's like... Don't do that. Wait, time out.

What happened to the Mythbusters guy? We'll get back to Cilento in a second. Adam from Mythbusters did Goatsy. What does that mean he fucking like pulled his ass apart and took a picture of it what does that mean Goatsy what is Goatsy

Goatsy is asshole show asshole in the camera what the fuck are you talking about you haven't seen the picture no okay go look at it What the fuck are you talking about? You haven't seen the picture? No. Okay. Go look at it.

What the fuck are you talking about? You are sending us to look at a picture of Matt? You don't have to. It's Adam Savage's asshole. It exists. I don't mind seeing it. How do you know it's not a deep fake oh that's true

that shit's scary can we talk about that like what if you saw yourself deep faked on someone doing something horrendous like Goatsy what the fuck is Goatsy I don't get it is it some thing that I just is this some is this

a millennial i literally described it like multiple times put your hands in your asshole and you fucking rip it open you're sounding kind of like a millennial right now astro what do you mean what the fuck does that mean you literally put your hands in your ass and just pull it open it's like i don't imagine a donut you put hands in it and you rip it apart and you make the hole bigger. What? That's gross. Why would you talk about that? Okay, yeah, I didn't say it was cool.

I didn't say it was awesome. Why would you talk about that? That's gross. I wasn't like, oh, guys, that's the thing I found. You shouldn't have. I said it was gross. You shouldn't have talked about that at all. My God.

Get over it, you zoomer. Wow. You really said Get over it, you zoomer. Wow. You really said that to him, huh? Yeah. Zoom, zoom, buddy. Zoom, zoom. You really said that to us? Yeah, you triggered Snowflake.

What? I was just trying to talk to him malarkey yeah yeah i mean since we have him like do you think we could write our letter to him about lola bunny and warner bros that's true i feel like he was behind it do you think joe biden was is like in the office then, in the background in some of the scenes? Oh, absolutely. He was probably doing that thing that villains do when they have their fingers and they're just going like... You know what I'm talking about? When they do the thing where they... Oh, Goatsy. Oh, my fucking God.

Can you stop talking about that no hold on a second you got mika mad you got mika mad can you just stop it's gross i don't want to hear about i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i kind of like it est Astro. I couldn't stop myself. Will you shut up, man? Will you shut up, man? He knew when he said that, that was going to be a reaction gif. Yep. He knew he'd put that on his shirt. He was like, the millennials are going to love this one.

SNL's going to eat this up. Oh, yes. Donald Trump spitting facts and logic at me. All I'm gonna say is, will you shut up, man? Boom! I'm a Virgo. Yeah, you are. Yeah?

What does that mean? Replace the O at the end with an I and an N. You know. Oh! Yeah, zinger. Zing. Hey, Astro. What? Wait, fuck.

Lola Bunny Goatsy. Stop! Stop, dude. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Okay, Astro. Yeah. Okay, so. Wait, Astro. Yeah. Okay, so. Wait, what?

I don't know. Great. Just spit it out, man. No, no, I, I, what's this noise? My, I got, I got garbage bags delivered. What? I had to unbox, I did a little unboxing. They're my garbage bags.

Oh, shit. Yeah, I got a. I did it a little unboxing. They're my garbage bags. Oh, shit. Yeah, I got a... Sleep-deprived unboxing. I got a motion-activated garbage can. First ed? Does it got print lines on it? Yeah, it's got print lines. Those make it worth more.

Wait, so you just got a garbage bag for... Sorry, you just got a garbage can for your new place. So where have you been putting your garbage in the meantime? That was a sensitive one for him just give him time okay Astro, okay Do dude stop you were messing with me right now what you're messing with me? No I forgot a question and i want to ask you it now okay okay so when we did the stream right i asked you about eden you know eden yeah like like eden like from the bible no the hell i don't remember this at all. You know, I told you about Eden, how it was, like, cancelled.

Eden, French fries. Eden, these nuts! Yes! Yes! Get fucked! Oh my god. What? I actually didn't get that. That just flew completely over my head. Like, eating? Like, Eden eating? Oh, I always get tricked for these, man.

You fucking did it, man. I'm so proud of myself. You're pissing me off. You know what I'm gonna do, Goatsy? That's a bad visual you just gave me. With that sound. I don't like that. I'll do a different one. Okay, yeah. No! Can we do like a cartoon like

What's he doing I'm doing Goatsy Oh my fucking god You're just gonna make him leave dude Isn't that the guy who sang Somebody that I used to know Pretty weird what he got into Some asshole that i used to stretch

i'm done with the podcast i'm ready to call premature baba buoy really you keep talking about go see i'll call it baba buoy no way come on guys we're all friends here oh we're not this is a business you think i care about you oh fuck i cared about you this whole time yeah right i hate you now i we're enemies because you are a millennial get i'm not a millennial you are a millennial you're a millennial you can't just call anybody that's like six months older than not a millennial you are a millennial you're a millennial you can't just call anybody that's like six months older than you a millennial i have a scale now i just unboxed a scale why'd you get a scale so i can weigh myself

flat you get a good weight there yep okay what is it i weigh like 500 pounds dude you never ask a woman their weight that's one thing you need to learn what's your weight don't do that that's rude what it's rude to ask a woman her weight how much do you weigh yeah i'm not going to tell you this is this is just like a millennial just like a millennial to keep mentioning the whatever that unmentionable disgusting thing was oh are you talking about goatsy what i'm done i'm done. I'm calling a Baba Booey. You thought we were joking? Astro, to be fair, you knew not to. You thought I was joking? Okay, I did.

You poked the stick at the hornet's nest. You poked the lion's big fat nuts. I just can't resist. You're pulling the victim card now that the lion said to you, you know what, don't poke my fat fucking nuts anymore. We had so many great things we were going to talk about we were going to talk about the patrick star spinoff there's a patrick star did go we were going to talk about ranking mcnugget dipping sauces we were going to

ronald mcdonald did go we were going to talk about dream merch i think we might canonically kill off astro'sist. What the hell, man? Okay, well, I'm going to do Goatsy before I die. No! Why not? We will literally kill you right now and bring you back as a skeleton in an astronaut suit. Is that what you want?

You know what? Yeah. Wait, this is like my origin story. No. This is my origin story. Now it's our turn to talk the ritual is already starting you are about to die you are not a clean

object I'm doing go see right now kill me try to kill me I go and see all I want! A panda bring me the sacrificial knife. No! It's heavy man! Get him! Yeah try and stop this fat white ass! It's wide open!

No! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Bring the skeleton in the astronaut suit Bring the skeleton No It hurts It hurts

Transfer the souls. I'm still doing ghosty. That's the... Ah! Ah! Why are the cops at my door? I have a noise complaint. Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo.

Ah! Number 474744477. Are you doing the Among us keypad opening no I mean the ritual is complete hey what's up guys I'm a skeleton in a space suit now I would do Goatsy but I don't have an asshole shut up he wouldn't say that

I honestly still don't know if that's a real fucking thing. I can't do it anymore. I'm a skeleton. I can't do cutscenes. It could very well be real. And I'm just going to ignore the possibility that it is. If you had to rate dipping sauces... You know what?

It's just not the same anymore. It's just not the same. I don't want to do it anymore. Astro, this guy pissed me off royally. I'm more pissed off than when I saw that they took the Lola Bunny's titties away. I'm pretty sure you've made

him more mad than he is mad at Discord for hating Discord. I hate Discord. You don't even want me to start talking about that. Maybe another time. Maybe another time I'll talk about it. I'll just talk about it another time, maybe. But let's keep it in the back pocket.

You know? Bah. Bah? Bah. It's like Pavlov's dog They think it's about to end They're frothing at the mouth right now What was that?

Lola Bunny should do Goatsy. Bubba Booey.