Sleep Deprived Podcast - Sleep Deprived Podcast #49

Episode Date: January 23, 2022

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i'm eating a mcnugget what you got a mcnugget from uh from big don's huh mika keep your money up not your funny up hey everybody welcome back to sleep the pro podcast episode 49 guys we got a big episode today special guests oh my god we got an agent uh an agent for the podcast to handle our bookings and i mean well i mean the agent yeah yeah uh peter peter agent agent peter agent mr agent not related agent peter agent are there two peters now no no I'm not going to lie. It's Peter MSNBC. God damn it. Yeah, listen, he owns the podcast. He's pulling some strings, though.

He's flexing his muscles. I told you it's awkward around him because I had sex with him, and it's awkward. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, what? You don't remember? That was like 20 episodes. I let the world know. Oh, man. And I'm embarrassed by it.

And every time I'm around, we get a little, you know, hot and bothered. Astro. It's awkward. You're telling me you put your seed in his bum bum. I put more than my seed in there. You're planting a family with Peter. You didn't tell us anything? I'm pregnant with Agent Peter from MSNBC.

Wow. Well, I mean, I'm sorry that this It's fine I'm sorry it struck a nerve, Astro It's fine, it's fine It's big, it's a big episode today Because Peter flexes creative muscles He made a couple phone calls

And oh my god, we've got Betty White We've got Betty White on the podcast, everybody Give it up How's it going, Betty? What? Betty? podcast everybody give it up how's it going betty what betty okay she must be shy just continue on betty how's your have you been holding up i saw the people magazine article about how you're still in such great health after a hundred years were you there when uh they invented the mcchicken chicken guys big news story on twitter twitter has just enabled nft profile pictures what the heck

this is fucking awesome what do you think i think it's really dumb and if you use a nft profile picture i will listen all i'm saying is the person who makes a script to ban all the hexagon profile pictures is going to get a lot of followers. Dude, we should write this. Dude, this is just like racism. I think we could write it. We could write a little Python script. Yeah, I'm down.

Alright. I gotta take a stand for the NFTs out there. What? Dude, shut the hell up. You like NFTs? Circles suck. Hexagons are way better than circles. They got rid of squares for this? Yo, can we go back to squares?

Squares are so much better than circles. I like squares. I like squares so much. I can get down with that, yeah. What about triangles? You're kidding. You're so lame. Triangles? it's the strongest shape is it actually shape yeah they're gonna introduce triangles for if you steal an nft and then like if you screenshot an nft it's gonna automatically make you a triangle that'd be funny that That's based. Betty.

Don't laugh at her, man. Betty, do you own any NFTs? Oh, Mika. Yeah. I had this really good idea, actually. I came up with this on the spot the other day. I was thinking we would do some sort of digital plane, right? And then it shoots out these PNG images of burgers, and we could mint each one.

And then each burger could be its own NFT. It would be like the Burger Plane NFT project. What do you think? Wait, time out. Time out. I got it. What? We make an NFT project that is called The Airplane or something, right? Oh, my God.

And then every day, a new burger is minted with a different property. And the burger has a different bun. There's different meats. That's what I'm saying. One of them is smoking on a weed thing. Exactly. This is a perfect rendition of Mika's great idea. Mika will sign it off, and it'll be mika's idea by mika why is it my idea i like wait no mika you were telling me

about how you wanted to do that no extension of it's natural some of them could have the geolithic glasses you know so each day we shoot out a new burger nft for a lucky person except we're not minting them we're grilling them each each day a new yeah it's not really a new burger is grilled it's not the same it's not the same as other nfts this one's more moral and ethical yeah because it's not minted so we're not like destroying the planet or whatever yeah it's grilled it's yeah it's grilled it's flame grilled instead of minted so it burns less amazon trees so the but what about what about like the the methane from the cows that meek up the birds well so a lot of nfts a lot of nfts they just waste the cows that the burgers well so a lot of NFTs

a lot of NFTs they just waste the cows or they waste the trees but we're gonna take down the trees and we're gonna grow over new burgers so it's like we're replacing the land with better ingredients you know what I mean so it's not the same but uh

but that make no sense right now you're not did I no but so you're talking about the but like if the thing and then you put the thing

in the thing and you put the thing in the thing and then the thing we will grow digital wheat fields To make the buns Dude I thought you were going to say weed We will grow weed Digital weed

What about weed NFTs We can make a weed smoking a blunt You know just wacky weird shit like that Fuel thick glasses MLG hat We should make MLG NFTs Oh my god Air horn oh my god nah but what if the the burger has like an mlg air horn and it's like it it's doing a 360 no scope and has sunglasses

mika that's what i'm saying dude you're finally starting to understand i think you're coming around the whole nft thing admit it i'm coming around on this nft thing to be honest like to be honest we should just go to mars like forget earth we should terraform mars just start over completely atmosphere we should completely exploit and ravage this planet and then just move on like locusts or something you guys want to know what i got i don't know i don't know what did you get i don't even hear it i got pop rocks oh cool man that's so awesome dude that's sick yeah cool man no it's really cool thanks

yo i was saving this just for the podcast you should really get closer to the mic yeah there we hear that a little better? Wow. That's awesome. Dude, that's so cool. Yeah. Yeah. Can we hear some more? I want to hear that again.

Holy. That is so rad that you decided to do that. I love thinking about them in your mouth. It's awesome, man. It's a really awesome moment for us. Is that the sound that Tesla makes when it charges? Who? Oh, Elon Musk. Oh, Daddy Musk will take me to the moon.

Yeah. Hey, speaking of the moon, a panda was telling us some weird shit about the moon some kind of crazy conspiracy oh yeah also the word old word of the day is robot shut up dude you and also i'd like to apologize to nard war no i want the nard war if you're hearing this, I'm actually sorry. For you, little Uzi. I don't think you smell Nardwar. I think you do. Just tell us your conspiracy theory of Panda. I'm so mad

at you for ruining my Wordle. Robot. I did before it was Proxy. It was. How the fuck do you know? How the fuck did that be Proxy? So stupid. How could you figure that out? Well, if you played Pokemon, you would know that proxy

is one of the legendary Pokemon, and you would know that. As a computer science dropout, I knew what it was. It's not even a real word. That's like a nerd word. Nerd word! Nerd word! I'm logging into the telnet right now, and I'm gonna

SSH you to hell, dude. Fuck you. Nardwaur just teaches rappers SAT words. Can you do Nardwaur voice? For you, Lil Uzi! Gumption! You think the word will ever be penis?

That's what I guessed today. Well, you gotta start the world out with like audio or some kind of word that has a lot of vowels in it lose i do lose lose like l-e-i-u-s or whatever l-e-i-u-o-l-u lose my first wordle word is usually earth or about depends on how i'm feeling wow yeah. A word with one vowel in it, Mika. This is why you can't figure out. Those words both have

two vowels. Shut up, bro. About has three vowels. What are you saying? Computer science. I just can't spell, maybe. Don't worry, dude. I can't either. It's fine. I'm getting on a plane to LA and I'm gonna crash it you should get on a plane to the moon where a panda

is supposed to tell us about the thing about the moon it's been 5 minutes and you still haven't told us about the moon so you know a Nell from One Piece he lives on the moon and he's working with the millions

no one knows what are you talking about He lives on the moon. And he's working with the millions. You know what I'm saying? No one knows what you're talking about. What are you talking about? Someone's going to know. Someone listening is going to know and be like, I know, I know. I know. Yeah, but you were telling us something else about staging and piles. No, I actually do think Bush did 9-11. That's partially ironic.

Wait. Wait, what? 9-11, and that's partially ironic. Wait. Wait, what? 9-11! Uzi, what do you think of 9-11? For you, Uzi! Steel beam! North Tower! I've heard some very questionable things from you, Panda, about other things.

Mika, what are you talking about? Dozens of questionable things on the daily. Like what? Like I heard you talking about how there's like a small global elite of lizard people. I feel like Hillary Clinton has bolts in her spine. Hillary clit. Nice. Hillary clit. I will be voting for Hillary clit.

Hillary clitoris. Hillary clitoris. Pyridocic lichus. Fucking globule. on bro okay guys bro she's starting to tweet like she is the gonna run again she's i swear to god hillary yeah she's starting to tweet some like presidential shit like you remember when mark zuckerberg started touring the world like during that one year somewhat before the election. Everyone was like, wait, Mark is just

gearing up for a presidential run. Yeah, Hillary clits back. She's been tweeting shit. Is she actually? Yeah, she's been tweeting shit, bro. I'm not even joking. Didn't Trump say he also wanted to fight again?

Yeah, they should. Honestly, let's do a rerun. That would not go well. That would not go well. Who do you think would win the rematch? Trump. I think Trump would win. I think Trump would win. Hillary Clinton is just a loser,

you know? I'm chilling in Cedar Rapids. Bing chilling in Cedar Rapids. What other wacky weird shit as you said pokemon go to the poles oh dude i've actually been playing so much pokemon go lately uh okay yeah i'm actually catching a trubbish as we speak. A Trubbish? Is that the trash Pokemon? Yeah, they're deceptively far. You gotta throw your Pokeballs really far for those guys.

They're deceptively far away. They're a little far away. Hold on, I gotta prop Betty up real quick. they're a little far away sure hold on I gotta prop Betty up yep she's good a panda I heard you say that you

you don't think that Jesus is dead no I he's not he rose from there yeah to be seated at the right hand of the father so where is he now exactly he's sitting in a chair have you seen a picture to the right side of god preach it sister i don't think jesus was white no he wasn't white oh well now we're on the same page amen

I'm getting really frustrated with you a panda not telling us what you actually think about the moon it's kind of pissing us off yeah okay Asher why do you care well because you let up this whole entire podcast for the whole week you've been talking about this moon thing and then the second we hit record

you're just not even going to mention it that's what I do it's bullshit man the people need to know the whole week you've been talking about this moon thing, and then the second we hit record, you're just not even gonna mention it. That's what I do. That's what I do. It's bullshit, man. The people need to know. They don't need to know. This is worse than when Schlatt wouldn't tell us why he hates Discord. What?

Oh, fuck that company, man. This is the episode. You just got a 30-minute rant about it. No, I'll talk about it next time but like holy shit bro what a terrible group of people yeah there's a reason i haven't bought nitro and i'm about to dish it soon dude you gotta give us a little more than that you gotta give us a little more than that maybe for episode 50 you can pull it out. Okay. Yeah, episode 50 is definitely the time when I start talking about Discord, I think.

So you're going to buy Nitro? Yeah, no. I've never bought Nitro. I don't even accept it when it's gifted to me. I've never had Discord Nitro. That's some strong passion. Yeah. So if I were to gift had Discord Nitro That's some strong passion Yeah So if I were to gift you Discord Nitro

No I would not hit accept I would let that shit expire So if I $100 out of my own pocket In the DMs I give you it You wouldn't accept it? Oh I'd take $100 No no no

It's like a NFT Oh then I definitely No no no it's like an NFT Oh then I Definitely take it Yeah it's just going up to the moon What if Discord made NFTs They probably will Maybe they already have I feel like

Discord would probably follow In Twitter's footsteps of like I don't know having NFT profile pictures or something. Because every NFT project has a bus and Discord server. Am I right? Have you ever been in any of them?

Yeah, they're crazy. How so? It's just they all have like Twitter people who just look at Twitter and reply to people. Have you ever seen Gary V's replies? Can you go to Gary V's Twitter profile and just look at the replies to these things and tell me if any of them come across as human?

Sure. Let me narrate some of them right now. Let me just get to it. Emily First, CEO of VaynerMedia, creator of VFriends. And then you just jesus all right so this is the uh the this is a tweet that says tea tea emoji is back today and the replies say my brother's shop wholesale teaolesale tea, access, and 30-year deals as a go-to guy for commercial coffee equipped direct from Italy, etc. Those that drink coffee in Utah spend three times per capita. It's a ducking goldmine of opportunity. Fluidgoods.com slash index dot html i know the biz stats haven't been able to figure out how to go into the biz with the sips so i hawk and then there's someone who's like can you please check out my

sneaker nft collection and it's a link to an open c and it's and it's literally just slightly edited photos of brand name shoes like there are nike logos all over this the air jordan logos all over this and he's trying to sell them for like 0.1 ethereum how much is that hundreds of dollars there's a five thousand dollar bitcoin giveaway right here binance.com i'm clicking that really click on that i'm clicking whoa they do, those things where they double the money. Those are. I love those. Can you hear me? Yeah.

I can't hear anyone. Why is my screen flashing colors? But yeah, like you'll see. You'll see a. You'll see. You'll see a reply to Gary Vee from this. Help. NFT project.

And it's like, we love you, Gary. And you look and they like they're just bumping up the numbers because they have discords where they add everyone and they're like hey please interact with this i always wonder why they got so many likes even though like they have like four followers everyone made no sense to me exactly exactly so the the the nft account will have like a bunch of people in their discord it's not like a general discord with a bunch of people in their Discord. It's not like a general Discord with a bunch of NFT people. No, it is.

So it's like a group for the NFT project. And they're all bought in already, right? So they're trying to make sure other people buy in. So the price of their investment goes up. And so they just hang around on twitter and bump the official nft projects accounts tweets and shit you know so it's literally a ponzi scheme well i'm not saying that but i'm saying if we grilled a burger every day we could probably get some twitter backing behind it and some hexagons.

Ooh. Yeah, it says if I pay the ransom, I can get the files back. Yeah, you should. That means you get one Bitcoin back. One Bitbra. You think I should use my credit card? Yeah.

Fuck. Astro, what's my credit card yeah what uh Astro what's your credit card number just wondering yeah yeah okay I'll just read it off

five four seven six what the fuck I'm on twitter and I see this by the New York Times What the fuck? I'm on Twitter, and I see this by the New York Times. Newly disclassified

video shows US killing of 10 civilians in drone strike. That's awesome, man. Dude, you had the best reaction for seeing that headline. You just don't see that type of thing on Twitter. You just don't see that type of thing on Twitter. You just don't see that type of thing on Twitter.

Let's talk about that. I want to make it clear, I don't think it's funny that people died. You really like to laugh at tragedy. And also, can I borrow $50,000 because there's a ransom on my computer? Oh yeah, here you go. Here you go

Whoa Yes, okay. Oh my god. Yes Me go up man. Not much, man. Just finished my album. Just got a mix and master it. What? Really? Wait. Okay.

Wait, are you serious right now? That is awesome. For real. That is amazing. I got a mix and master it, and then it's- Really? Are you kidding me? You're fucking crazy. You're fucking crazy.

What? What the fuck? You're crazy. Is it good? You are out of your mind. Wait, hold on. Time out. Is it good?

Is it like a good album, or is it just horseshit? No, mind wait hold on time out is it good is it like a good album or is it just horseshit horses no it's actually good have you heard my music i've never heard it wait really no okay so i'm gonna need you to stream alex unknown feeling like mario betty what do you think of the ninja pokeman drama oh shoot how have we not talked about that what happened like i saw a whole bunch of stuff but like i don't even know what happened reading multiple tweets and i still don't know what happened because it's like every time i try to understand it's like watch this streamer react to this streamer reacting to this streamer reacting to this streamer reacting to

that streamer about what this streamer said about the DM that this streamer sent that streamer relating to that streamer who knew this guy who knew this guy my brother and then my brother's friend said this and then it was my brother's cousin's friend

but actually what happened and then it was my brother's cousin's friend. But actually, what happened? That's Pokimane killing a career. Oh, guys, I kind of can't believe we forgot to say it, like we actually just read the obituary this morning and like we found that Jack Manifold died I didn't read that yeah someone flicked his head and it made a gong noise and then he just went brain dead

after that he just went brain dead after that. He just never said a word again. Always loved that bald head of his. Yeah. It actually happened on Big Ben and he fell off to his death. He fell off Bing Ben.

Bing Ben. It's not funny. Anyways, RIP Jack Manifold. Yeah, sorry, bud. Rest in peace. Shit happens. Just another Thursday.

Betty, don't fall over. Come on, it's gonna be okay Shalette talk to Betty she's not Betty girl um I guys I don't know what to do

damn dude I just realized this is a dead person what what wait when did that happen? Wait, hold on. Wait, someone has died on our show now? When we started the episode, she was alive. I mean, she joined the call.

Yeah. I mean, she's been in here for like three days straight. That's been a little weird, but she's been here. I'm gonna swing From the chandelier Oh man, I fucking hated that song so much. From the chandelier Actually, it wasn't that bad.

It was just overplayed. I'm a baby I'm a baby I love you. I love you I love you oh my god are you kidding me oh my god oh my god oh

oh hey what's your what's your what's your guys's mcdonald's what what's your mcdonald's order big wrap cause like everyone has a special order from mcdonald's what's your order this is the end of the podcast

pfft we're good we are going to be criminals now you realize that we're going to all die in jail, probably. I didn't pull the trigger. Well, it wasn't me. Wait, hold on.

Wait, who was it then? A panda? You would go to me. If it wasn't me and it wasn't you, Astro. It wasn't me. And it wasn't a panda. Wait, there's only one person left. Mika? No, it't a panda There's only one person left Mika No it was a panda

Mika Nah for real it was a panda Like I saw it Oh yeah that was a panda Okay okay Yeah he did I'd get three triple cheeseburgers For real, it was a panda. Oh, shit. Oh, yeah, that was a panda. Okay, okay. No, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, he did. I'd get three triple cheeseburgers with no pickles and no ketchup and also Big Mac sauce.

And then sometimes I'd go with a little Oreo McFlurry. No, well, here's the thing. The triple cheeseburgers are on the dollar menu and the Big Mac is not. Oh, my God. There are triple cheeseburgers at McDonald's? menu and the big mac is not oh my god you there are triple cheeseburgers yeah at mcdonald's yes they're three dollars each you said you're on the dollar menu dude well the dollar menu goes up to three dollars dickhead what yeah doesn't even make any sense a mcdouble is if you want if you want a double cheeseburger it's two dollars and if you want a regular burger it it's literally $1.

But everyone goes with the Big Mac because no one knows they actually just make regular unbranded burgers. Fuck McDonald's. What do you mean, fuck McDonald's? McDonald's is fucking rocks. Fuck McDonald's, the guy who made McDonald's. To be honest, McDonald's is pretty good. I do like a good McDonald's. Let's go, Mika.

What do you guys think of Wendy's? They kind of dropped the ball i like frosty yeah but didn't they get rid of the vanilla frosties like you can only get the chocolate frosty is always a better one what the f no yes what what what are you talking about are you good the chocolate frosty was always the better one how could you prefer chocolate ice cream over vanilla ice cream miki you're talking a lot of smack for someone who's you are a murderer i like the one piece i did not do anything of the sort it was a panda i did not do anything like that. And now I'm complicit. And now I'm complicit.

And now I'm complicit. I'm not. And now I'm questioning how you could possibly like chocolate Frosties over vanilla Frosties. They're just better, man. What do you want from me? You're so wrong, dude. It hurts. Genuinely confused.

Hey, Mika, maybe there's a reason they got rid of him then huh because most people don't agree with you because most people like the chocolate frosties better I got a chocolate frosty for you right here Jesus fucking Christ I'm believing I'm stopping my recording

he left he left I guess this is a this is a this is a Baba Booey moment that was a good bit why did he leave that was good that was pretty vile guys I know you guys thought it was funny

Baba Booey I'm done he left too fuck you man I'm sick of you and you know what you know what Baba Booey they fucking left You know what? You know what? You know what? Bababoo. They fucking left.

They all left. Bababoo.