SmartLess - "Kristen Stewart"

Episode Date: April 1, 2024

Take your beta blocker before chugging that milkshake: it’s Kristen Stewart. She dares to ask the question: “does anyone play golf?” What follows is an L-shaped couch, a Pomodoro with a... bunch of butter, and a very meaningful tattoo. Welcome to SmartLess.NATIONAL DISCLAIMER: Must be 21+ and present in select states. FanDuel is offering online sports wagering in Kansas under an agreement with Kansas Star Casino, LLC. First online real money wager only. $10 first deposit required. Bonus issued as nonwithdrawable bonus bets that expire 7 days after receipt. Restrictions apply. See terms at Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER or visit in Colorado, Iowa, Michigan, New Jersey, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Illinois, Tennessee, and Virginia. Call 1-800-NEXT-STEP or text NEXTSTEP to 53342 in Arizona, 1-888-789-7777 or visit in Connecticut, 1-800-9-WITH-IT in Indiana, 1-800-522-4700 or visit in Kansas, 1-877-770-STOP in Louisiana, visit in Maryland, visit in West Virginia, or call 1-800-522-4700 in Wyoming. Hope is here. Visit or call (800) 327-5050 for 24/7 support in Massachusetts or call 1-877-8HOPE-NY or text HOPENY in New York.See Privacy Policy at and California Privacy Notice at

Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, I've heard told you guys my life story before. Okay, so, Toronto, May, 1970. Well, it's weird. Over here, I'm getting the red light for you. Oh, that's a nod. You just want to start? Yeah. Welcome to Smartless. Lattice. Smart. Lattice. Smart.
Starting point is 00:00:32 Lattice. Hi JB. Hi you guys. So this is your new relax zone. JB's in Brooklyn. This is how I picture it. Now JB's now in New York for a stretch. And I pictured you going there Saturday.
Starting point is 00:00:47 And I asked you, because I was like, I know what you're... Just hear me out. You get to your spot, you drop your stuff, and then you find the spot on the couch where you're perpendicular to the TV. That is so true. Yeah, but I already scouted that though when I had to pick the apartment.
Starting point is 00:01:04 I had to make sure there was an L-type configuration in front of the TV. Rest of the apartment I don't care about. It doesn't matter. I just need to know I've got a nesting spot. Are you happy with the apartment? I am. Oh, good. I'm very happy, but you know, I'm a soft guy.
Starting point is 00:01:24 I'm prone to homesickness. It's lonely, I mean I live with three incredible women and now I'm all alone, but what did I have to sort of buoy my spirits? A pair of brand new slippers. The waiting for me in the apartment from sweet, sweet Shawnee. Yeah, how about that? Is that true Shawnee?
Starting point is 00:01:44 Yes, I got Willie something for his ankles and I got Jason. You did. I mean, did you get him some running weights for his ankles? No, he got me that thing to stretch my calves because I've been having my hamstring issue. And I sent you slippers because I know that-
Starting point is 00:02:01 But Shawnee, as I said in the text, you're not supposed to be well raised. I know I'm not well raised. We were kind of raised by wolves. But I think that's probably why, right? Yeah. But isn't it true though, like because I was thinking about you being alone there
Starting point is 00:02:14 and I was like, isn't it nice to have just something soft like that or whatever it is. Like slip, I texted you like slippers to me make a home. Yeah. Once you have slippers, then you feel like you're like. Or an L-shaped couch in front of an L-shaped. Sean, how come every time you say it's nice to have something soft you seem to grab on your belly
Starting point is 00:02:32 and you just give it a nice. I couldn't mail my belly. The cookie pouch. Oh, I miss it. How are you guys doing? What's going on back home? So listen, my thing is, I think I, well, Will FaceTimed me and I answered it from the ER, right?
Starting point is 00:02:52 Not just that, we had been, I had seen him for lunch. Yeah. Okay, we had this lunch meeting with, and JB, you would have been there, but you were traveling, so we had this lunch meeting. I don't know, 90 minutes later, I FaceTime Sean to ask him something.
Starting point is 00:03:09 And he's on a- He's in the back of an ambulance. No dude, he's on a gurney. He's on a gurney in the hall at Cedars. Angel, what happened? And I go, what the fuck is going on? Yeah, no, I got the AFib thing again, and you guys know. And they just, I talked about it on the tour.
Starting point is 00:03:27 And that's where Jimmy Kimmel gave me the nickname of Paddle. So I texted Jimmy and I said Paddle's is at it again. And I took a picture and I texted it to Jimmy of me in my gown all hooked up to the wires. And yeah, I just said AFib. And so they put me out, they paddled, they zapped my heart. So for the medical Tracy's out there,
Starting point is 00:03:46 AFib is what, it's just an irregular heartbeat? Yeah, it's atrial fibrillation, so some people are in it all the time and they don't know it. I know when I get it, which is a good thing, because then I can go to the ER. Here's the worst part, or the best part. Your heart just raced.
Starting point is 00:04:00 Here's the best part, so we're at this lunch, again, business lunch. The guy says, you guys want anything, you guys want anything, he's gonna Oh the guy says you guys want anything you guys want anything at the end? He's gonna bring the check you guys wanted you want a coffee or somebody said I'll take a coffee our buddy Rick is there Rick Kay Rick says I'll take a coffee too and Sean says that's the guys walking around walking away. I'll take a milkshake He goes he goes just by the way just vanilla just have dessert for lunch. It's noon and he goes, he goes, he goes, just, by the way, just vanilla, just vanilla. And I said, and I said, and if you've got any paddles, bring them to the table.
Starting point is 00:04:32 Oh no. Oh my God, I forgot you said that. So 90 minutes later, he's in the hallway at fucking Cedars and if I get on a gurney and I'm like, oh fuck. Those gowns are beautiful though. If he goes down from this today and I've suggested the paddles, I'm really gonna feel badly for a couple weeks.
Starting point is 00:04:48 So you get into the, okay, so you feel the heart is racing, I should get to an emergency room because things might unravel from here. Like it doesn't fix itself. You need to go in there and you literally need to get like a jump start to get it. It's like restarting a car or something. But they put you out, which is great.
Starting point is 00:05:10 And of course, I always try to think of something. Oh, by the way, I read the thing. Wait, we'll cut out this air that takes me to find this. This is worth it. This is great. We can have some music. We can play some music now. Sorry, mystery guest. Just hang on. Shawn's got props. Shawn's got some stuff in there.
Starting point is 00:05:26 So I said, she starts going, she starts going, because this is what they do every time. Who's she? The doctor in the ER. This is what they do, because I've been cardioversion, it's called cardioversion. And I've had this done to me like 15 times. So she starts gathering the anesthesiologist,
Starting point is 00:05:46 two nurses, her, somebody else, I don't know. There was like five or six people there. And they stand around the bed right before the procedure and they have to announce all this stuff. And as she's getting into it, I say, do you mind if I take over? And she goes, sure. I go, okay, everyone, the patient's name is Sean Hayes,
Starting point is 00:06:01 date of birth is 6-26-70, we're treating him today for atrial fibrillation. We're gonna use 10 milligrams of Atomidate and we're gonna attempt cardioversion. Everybody okay? And she goes, she's like, what? Nobody's ever done that. She goes, yeah, now we're ready.
Starting point is 00:06:17 That's how often I've had this done. Oh my God. God, you will do anything for applause. So what about maybe buying your own set of paddles? Oh, that's a great idea. No, I thought about it. And just doing like small, why don't you turn the garage into an ER?
Starting point is 00:06:33 Or just a section of it near the washer dryer where maybe Scotty can just kind of bang you back into rhythm. Yeah, they can teach Scotty. My friend Robert has paddles at his house, like a whole thing. Truly. Wow. All right, well, like a whole thing. What, truly, wow. All right, well, so I'd love to circle back to, and I'm sorry, guests, we're gonna get right to you,
Starting point is 00:06:51 but I'd love to get you to stop drinking ice cream for lunch. I know. You're right. You know, so let's just start to just kinda chip away at maybe the problem before. How is that gonna happen? Dude, he's got the maker at home problem. How is that going to happen? Dude, he's got the maker at home now.
Starting point is 00:07:07 Now he's got the ashram maker. You forget. It doesn't have anything to do with that. It just has, it's because I had a gummy. It's a long conversation. Oh. Yeah, I don't stumble into Afib. If it was because of the gummies, we'd be talking to JB.
Starting point is 00:07:21 He'd be at fucking, he'd be at New York Presbyterian right now. As would the entire country, now that it's all legal and people are enjoying it. But if you're prone to it, like I am, then it's like a trigger. Listen, I don't wanna mention, I don't wanna cut in because we don't have a lot of time because there's gonna be air so far away from it,
Starting point is 00:07:39 but I, instead of going there, I went to the All-Star Game and I coached Connor McDavid and I was the co-captain with Connor McDavid. That's right. Get to Willie's All-Star game and I coached Connor McDavid and I was the co-captain with Connor McDavid. That's right Willie's All-Star weekend. I just it's really quick. I had a hockey nirvana. It was a fucking it was unbelievable I finally met Wendell Clark for the first time I that was the first time you met him I was sure Tracy Wendell Clark is a very very famous ex hockey player that will is is is such a fan of
Starting point is 00:08:05 that your avatar on your texting is... I didn't know who he is. Even Sean knows. He gets golf balls with just the 19 on them because that was Wendell's number. 17, 17. JB last year for my birthday very sweetly got Wendell to make me a video and then sent me some signed stuff
Starting point is 00:08:21 and that blew me away. Cameo, cameo? Not even a cameo, no, no, no. He went and got in touch with him and it was very sweet. So anyway, I saw him in an elevator. I said, I didn't expect that this is how it was gonna happen but I met him in an elevator and it was just unbelievable. And I got, I coached, well coach, fuck,
Starting point is 00:08:36 I just stood there like a dink. No, they said, what do you wanna do, coach? I'm like, who wants to hear from a stupid actor? What are you talking about? I'm just here to- Yeah, were you down in like the locker room having to give like a rah rah speech? Yeah, I gave a speech. So I gave are you talking about? I'm just here to- Yeah, were you down in the locker room having to give a rah rah speech? Yeah, I gave a speech.
Starting point is 00:08:46 So I gave a speech, and so what I did was- So who? Who was on your team? Connor McDavid, Leon Dreisaitl. We had David Pasternak from the Bruins. I had Brody Jenner from- We had fucking Connor Hellebuck, the greatest goalie in the league right now.
Starting point is 00:09:01 And for a pregame speech, Peter Laviollette, the Hall of Fame coach, was next to me. And I said, let me give the speech. And I put together from a different sport, all great quotes I strung together from Jürgen Klopp, my guy at Liverpool. And I made a speech about it. And it was like, it literally was, it was ridiculous.
Starting point is 00:09:18 I think I lost him at the end when I said, when I first came to Dortmund, and they're like, what? Dortmund? Anyway, it was fantastic. we had a great time, and I don't wanna spend too much time, but it was so cool. Did Wendell Clark knew who you are?
Starting point is 00:09:30 Yeah, he did actually, I will say that. And his wife saw that I was like, and she nudged him, because he didn't see me at first, and then it was sick. And then I got to say to my dad, we walked down and I said, and I see Wayne Gretzky, and I said, Wayne, have you ever met my dad? He's like, no, and my dad was like, it was unbelievable.
Starting point is 00:09:44 That's crazy that Wayne Gretzky and I say, Wayne, have you ever met my dad? He's like, no, and my dad was like, it was unbelievable. That's crazy that Wayne Gretzky was there. The whole weekend. That's the, the little guy makes good. He comes back home and. It's funny you say that. So the last thing I'll say is so Abel, you guys know my 13 year old, he says to me the other night and he goes,
Starting point is 00:09:57 look, I'm going to check and make sure he's doing his homework and he goes, dad, I'm really proud of you. I said, and I go, what do you mean? I go, what are you talking about? We hadn't been talking about it. He goes, well, probably the little kid version of you didn't think that you'd ever be there
Starting point is 00:10:11 at the All-Star Game doing what you did. And he goes, I don't know if it's weird for a son to be proud of his dad, but I'm really proud of you. And then he came up and he gave me a hug, and he kissed me on the head. It was so sweet. Oh, God, you must have fucking fallen apart.
Starting point is 00:10:22 He's such a sweet kid, and I did fall apart. You big softy. That's very like old soul of him to say. Yeah, very old soul. I'm gonna cry too, so I'm gonna stop. I love that. Really lucky. Now, they weren't there with you, were they?
Starting point is 00:10:35 They couldn't, no, just because of school, it was too many days away from school and they're in middle school and high school. But you filled them in. Oh my God, I FaceTimed Abe from the bench as the game was going on. And I was just like, I can't hear you. Are they hockey fans, Will?
Starting point is 00:10:48 Ish, not as much because they grew up in California, but yeah, anyway, we've taken up so much time of our guests and our guest doesn't deserve to have me ramble on. Pretty awesome though, I bet you the guest is crying right now. They need a little time to get it together. I don't, I doubt it, but I don't know.
Starting point is 00:11:04 But this person- That's pretty cool, Will. Yeah, thanks. Yeah, it was once in a lifetime and it was extraordinary. And speaking of extraordinary, you know I love my segues. Yes, beautiful. We're talking extraordinary talent because our guest, she is an absolutely extraordinary artist, actor, filmmaker.
Starting point is 00:11:24 She'd been nominated for an Academy Award. She's won 22 Critics Awards. Come on. That's it? Oh yeah. She won Golden Globes, all of it. She's the first American ever to be awarded a César Award, the French Oscars. Appreciate the pronunciation on that. Yeah, thank you. César, what do you say, pronunciation on that. Césaire. For the...
Starting point is 00:11:48 Clouds of Cigarettes. To coffee. I take one cigarette, I wait, I meet up with my lover, I have a coffee. And she's just been in some of the biggest films of all time.
Starting point is 00:12:04 She's been in one of the hugest franchises ever at a very young age and took her through her 20s, I would imagine. I can't believe that she's only, I think, 33. It's hard to imagine because she's done so much extraordinary work. And she's about to start. She's going to be in her new film, which is being released around the time that we're doing... Good research. Good for you.
Starting point is 00:12:27 I'm sure the studio is thrilled right now as you're watching for the date. No, I know, but... She's got a great laugh. We know that much. She's dying to appear. I'm literally trying to think... I bet she's got the date. Why don't you introduce her, you numb nut? No, they gave me the date and I want to get... But the trailers look so amazing. Love Lies Bleeding.
Starting point is 00:12:43 It looks so amazing from A24. Anyway, guys, it's Kristen Stewart. Oh, wow! Kristen Stewart! Guys! Can you believe this? Kristen Stewart! What are you doing saying yes to this podcast?
Starting point is 00:12:55 What a nice person. Fire your publicist. Tortured, sitting through our torture. I know, I'm so sorry to put you through that. Hi. Hey. How's it going? My heart is pounding now. I don't know if it'm so sorry to put you through that. Hi. Hey. Hi. How's it going?
Starting point is 00:13:06 My heart is pounding now. I don't know if it's like the initial conversation about your shitty heart, but mine's not like. Mine's pretty shitty. Well, because listening is interesting. You sit around and listen to the podcast and you forget you have to go on it
Starting point is 00:13:18 because it's like fun to listen to you guys and then you're like, oh no. It's not that great. It only gets great when the guest comes on. Yeah, the phone starts now. Hello and welcome. Yeah, welcome Christian Stewart. So nice to meet you. then you're like, oh no. It's not that great. It only gets great when the guest comes on. Hello and welcome. Welcome, Kristen Stewart. So nice to meet you. Thank you for doing this.
Starting point is 00:13:29 Oh, does she have a coffee drink, Kristen Stewart? Oh yeah. What kind of coffee is that? Is it a shake? Is it green? No, it's not. No, there's little flowers on this cup. Oh, cute.
Starting point is 00:13:39 You know what I was thinking about this, Kristen, walk us through your coffee routine in the morning, if you will, real quick. What's your go-to? I'm so into the start of this. Yeah, great. Don't worry, this will not be hard-hitting at all. It's a bunch of garbage.
Starting point is 00:13:52 No, coffee is like only something that I kind of recently got into. I never used to have any morning beverages. I just would barrel through and then I realized how fun it was. Oh yeah,. Little stimuli. So, do you wake up and go immediately downstairs or wherever into the kitchen and make coffee, or do you have a gap? And what kind of coffee do you make? I am very interested in this process.
Starting point is 00:14:15 So, for a while, I would, like, try and make espresso, but I'm not good at it. All of my poles are watery and weird. Yeah. First thing in the morning, too. You don't have skills. I'm kind of a it. All of my poles are watery and weird. Yeah. First thing in the morning, too. You don't have skills. I'm kind of a being out of bed. Like, I need to be quiet in order to not kind of, like, infuriate my family. What do you mean you take...
Starting point is 00:14:33 Oh, really? Because when you wake up, you're ready to go. Yeah. Yeah, I can wake up having, like, a full conversation. Like, oh, hey, what's up? What have you been doing? What are you thinking about? Oh, are you thinking about... Oh, my God, my wife's exactly like that. Chris, I'm like that, too. I'm very much like that. I'm not like that. Well, Sean'm like that too. I'm very much like that. I'm not like that.
Starting point is 00:14:45 Well, Sean, let's not get into your sleep hygiene. It's a fucking disaster. It's worse than your heart. You gotta get out of your bed, you gotta go downstairs, you gotta get in your car, drive over to where Scottie lives. And then... I've got the coffee maker that you can program the night before so you wake up
Starting point is 00:15:03 and it's already a full pot of coffee So it's it's it's grump and idiot proof. Is it just regular coffee JB? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah So just right so I I got it I don't know when maybe two years ago and I thought about this morning as I fuck I'm such a creature habit I never deviate no matter where I am. I go downstairs I turn on the kettle then I fire up the Nespresso machine, and I make two, a double Nespresso, little bit of brown sugar, and then I pour in, so I do Americano style.
Starting point is 00:15:34 Oh yeah, I was gonna say, what's the kettle for? Yeah, and then, so a little hot water, and then. Just so it looks like country and. No, no, no, no, cause. No, just cause, I don't know, Nespresso has made it so easy. I don't know if you've tried Nespresso. I mean, instead of trying to make espresso, Nespresso should be pretty good. Bear with him, Chris, and he's looking for a free machine.
Starting point is 00:15:54 I'm not. I'm not. I don't need, I got 160 bucks. Say Nespresso one more time, you'll get one. I've got 160 bucks. No, I'm not, by the way, Clooney owns part of Nespresso, I think, so like I'm not going to give Clooney owns part of Nespresso. I think so like I'm not gonna give Clooney anymore dough But anyway, that is my progress anyway, hi Kristen Stuart guest talk, huh?
Starting point is 00:16:15 Kristen where are you today? I'm in LA Did you grow did you grow up out in LA? I did actually I was bored I'm like I'm my first house that I ever lived in was in Topanga, like at the base of Topanga. No way. On the valley side or the beach side? Valley side, obviously. Oh really?
Starting point is 00:16:33 That's literally, that's right where I grew up. I grew up, so you know Gary's Market there on the corner of Dumetz and Topanga. Oh my God, you freak. My house is next door. Literally, my backyard, like my fence overlooked the parking lot and I would always peek through the gate and be like, I'm spying on people. That was my loop with my bike. I lived in a house between DuMetz and Kanoga,
Starting point is 00:16:58 or sorry, between Topang and Kanoga on DuMetz, like till I was 15, 16. That is crazy. This just sounds like a Tom Petty song. So we're Woodland Hills kids. See, the valley's not that bad. I take great pride, actually. I like being a little scumbag who literally, like,
Starting point is 00:17:18 gets high off the smell of a 7-Eleven. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There was an old van story. JB, I just saw JB's face Chris And you just made him so happy because he's no stories about being in Woodland Hills with his skateboard on the bus Right. Yeah, and I and I live in the 7-eleven store. I learned I learned I play Pac-Man asteroids everything in there I just live in there all day long little hostess, you know cake
Starting point is 00:17:40 Oh my god, what was it like growing up Chris? Like, were you like, Jay, did you have a skateboard? Did you play video games? What was it? Did you have siblings? All of those things. Yeah. All three of them, yeah. I would sit outside of my brother's room and watch him play video games until he would
Starting point is 00:17:54 like, let me enter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Really? Did you go to school out there? Did you go to Serenia or Parkman or Taft? This is so weird. I feel like you talk about the valley, but it's a big place, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:07 I went to Serenia Elementary School and I walked there every day. That's where I went to grade school until sixth grade. You guys, guess what else? You were both child actors. What? There's something in the water out there telling you. We'll be right back. SmartList is supported by Liquid IV. I don't know about you guys,
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Starting point is 00:19:46 Are you drained? Are you bursting with energy? I'm right in the middle. Like sometimes if I feel like I have been too social because I feel like I gotta keep my brain going, I like seeing people, I owe it to them because I love them, because my family and friends or whoever it is, I owe it to them to see them
Starting point is 00:20:05 and to actually give to them my time because I know it means a lot to them and it means a lot to me when they do it for me. But sometimes you can get run down from that. So it's all about finding the balance of like, how do you take the time from me, but also be there for the people that you love, which is the most important thing in the world.
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Starting point is 00:21:52 Just go to this exclusive web address to try ZipRecruiter for free. slash smartless. Once again, that's slash smartless. ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire. And now, back to the show. I wanted to get to this because I love, I love, because JB obviously started when, I don't know, God, you were what, seven or something, JB? Ten? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:17 And so like, so there you go. So he always understands this, that experience. Talk, let's talk a little bit about that, JB. Let's talk about first jobs. First jobs, little house in the prairie. Did your parents drive you to like a million auditions over the hill? Yeah. And yeah, so I just grew up on the venture of freeway, you know, lots of traffic on the
Starting point is 00:22:38 way. But that's, I learned how to drive. I paid attention with freeway driving, how to merge late, you know, you kind of skip the line. And then when they weren't able to drive me into the city, I'd have to get on the bus there on Ventura Boulevard, stop every single red light, although it would take me an hour and a half to get in the city, but I have my skateboard, my little head shot in my little manila envelope,
Starting point is 00:23:00 and I'd get off at like Hollywood and Highland and skateboard the rest of the way. And, you know, but it's for the passion, you know, Kristen, envelope and I'd get off at like Hollywood and Highland and skateboard the rest of the way and yeah You know, but it's for the passion, you know Kristen just the passion of the of the of the craft from jump You just want a passionate young man Was that your experience to like you're going with your folks to audition because your parents were both it worked in Entertainment as well, right? Yeah, my mom really hooked me up because she was a script supervisor. And so if she wasn't on a movie, she would be the guy taking me around, which is a total bitch.
Starting point is 00:23:31 It's just constant and like, yeah. You wanted it though, you wanted to be an actor, yeah? No, she was forcing me into it. I was begging her, yeah. You will contribute to the bottom line of this house. So for Tracy, the script supervisor is the person who keeps their eye on the script, makes sure the actors say the lines correctly,
Starting point is 00:23:53 helps the director in the camera department with screen direction, and if things match, et cetera. Like if you're using your left hand to pick up the glass in all the first three takes, and then the next take you pick it up with the right hand, that's not gonna cut so she'll say, so are you, did you grow up being incredible at continuity? Like would you always match your action?
Starting point is 00:24:14 No, I think it's sort of the opposite where I was always like that shit doesn't matter. Really? Yeah, it was like if that's what you're paying attention to then you're really not doing your job, right? It's that classic. You got bigger problems, yeah. No, I would drive her crazy, we've never're paying attention to, then you're really not doing your job, right? It's that classic. We got bigger problems, yeah. No, I would drive her crazy.
Starting point is 00:24:27 We've never worked together. Oh, you guys haven't. Oh, you haven't? Mm-mm. Huh, what'd Dad do? Wow. Stage manager. So he did TV, which we always gave him a bunch of crap for
Starting point is 00:24:38 because we were pretentious movie people. So stage manager, so multicam for studio audience shows? Yeah, he was super into the kind of... He always told us that making movies was like watching paint dry. Oh, yeah. Because it's boring and takes forever and he's like running variety shows. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did he ever do any sitcoms? Would I have worked with him?
Starting point is 00:24:58 Because I did a bunch of those back then. I feel like he did mainly like game shows, like Fear Factor, a lot of like award shows, and also talk shows. Like I bet you've worked with him a lot, but like not on anything long. You know what I mean? Like you've probably been on shows that he's worked on.
Starting point is 00:25:14 Are they excited for you? I mean, your success is not new. Were they excited for you? Or was it just like, yeah, we're all in the business. It just kind of just happens. No, they were stoked and tripping on it. And my dad is, but both in very different ways, and kind of like reflective of both of their vocations.
Starting point is 00:25:33 Like I think as script supervisor, there's a department of one, and that's always like a freak. My mom's like not very social, and like does her own thing, and is like a weird thing. They're always my favorite people on the set though. I know me too. Yeah, me too. Well, they're either like the best or the worst,. I know me too. Yeah, I know me too.
Starting point is 00:25:45 Well they're either like the best or the worst where you're just like, oh she's gonna like, she's a stickler, she's gonna kill me, or you're like that, you know. Yeah. The keeper of, or you just want to impress them. Right, right, right, yeah. Yeah, with the way you match your action,
Starting point is 00:25:58 but you said. You're like, did you see that? It was perfect, we only had to do it three times. They must be super thrilled with the way you've been able to transition though from being successful in childhood into a young adult and then into adult. Because as you know, it just doesn't happen that often.
Starting point is 00:26:15 Yeah, it is weird. I know my mom, like, before she was nice enough to cart me all over town, she was like, do you really wanna do this? We have to pay all this money for headshots., you know, you got to pay me back if this ever works out. And I was like, I will. And I remember her looking in the rear view mirror being like, OK, well, I believe in
Starting point is 00:26:35 you, but you have to believe in yourself. Like the most cliche cartoon version of like the start of something. And I was like, trust in me. Like a poster with the kitten saying, hang in there. Yeah, a bumper sticker. But it does, it works though. That's great. Yeah, but she totally was like, oh no, I'm going to watch my kid. I can imagine now, like, school is so scary.
Starting point is 00:26:54 Being just a little guy in the world in every way is so scary. I can't imagine having a little kid and like at five years old you have to be like, goodbye, for so many hours, you're gonna go off on your own, and we're not gonna know what's going on, and you're just gonna have to figure it out. Like even that totally freaks me out. And so the idea of my parents dealing with like me, you know, being like, you're a bad actor,
Starting point is 00:27:16 and you're ugly, and you don't get the job. Yeah, yeah. But also like I talk about this a lot too, like you and Jason have this where you're not, I imagine, in awe of things that I would be in, having not grown up and wanting to be in the business when I was older. I still am in awe.
Starting point is 00:27:36 If I meet certain actors or celebrities or whatever, I'm just like, oh my God, I can't believe, today I can't believe I'm meeting Kristen Stewart. It's crazy, it's really cool. Were you desensitized to that? For example, Panic Room, which I wanna talk about, I love that movie, I've seen it 10 times. And of course, I'm so gay, when the thing was over,
Starting point is 00:27:54 I was like, I tried to Google, where did they film that? I love that beautiful house. What a brownstone. Yeah, what brownstone was that? It was a set, right? I'm sure it was a set. It was like a fully functional brownstone built on a sound stage in Manhattan Beach.
Starting point is 00:28:08 It was every outlet worked. It was mind blowing. It was like in a time where, like as people do this, you just have to be like one of five men who are allowed to do it. But Fincher is one of those people and he just built,
Starting point is 00:28:19 you could have transplanted that. You could live in it. We should honestly see like where the pieces are. Let's build it. But all those walls were They were all they could fly all those walls, right? Cuz all those intricate camera moves they had to I would imagine right the whole thing was like on hydraulics all bit Yeah, I mean, I think they were like also different, but we had like five actual I mean
Starting point is 00:28:37 I don't know if it was five but we had like different panic rooms that were detached from the whole house and then there was One embedded in the actual house that was like totally practical. And then like, there was like, yeah, and then it was just the most elaborate playground for her. Sean, that's what you call when you, in the pantry when you run out of Snickers, you call that the panic room, right? Right.
Starting point is 00:28:57 Wait, but to my point, like when you first of all, got the part, and then at such a young age, and then there's Jodie Foster and you guys are like working together, to me, again, to me I would have been like, oh my God, it's Jodie Foster. But having grown up in the business where you're like, hey Jodie, I'm Kristen, here we go, this thing goes like this and blah blah blah, were you desensitized to it?
Starting point is 00:29:20 It was different, like, because I was now being spoken to. It's like, I guess I was now being spoken to it's like I guess I grew up on movie sets like eating Snickers and stuff But I wasn't actually like in front of the camera and being like hey, what's up? How's it going? What are we gonna do now like it was right? so that part was like It was crazy that all of a sudden I was like part of the process because I grew up hanging out with my mom on set All the time and that's kind of why I wanted I mean it is why I wanted to be there and to engage with it.
Starting point is 00:29:47 I can't remember if I was starstruck, like I wasn't, it was, I was like intimidated by just being, having to be like, okay, this is like a job and I have to be like, yeah, for sure Jodie, let's do this, let's rehearse, let's block this scene. But it started off being someone else. But for you was it like kind of like how it was for me, where you, like, had I been older and understood all the adult responsibilities of rent and taxes and all that stuff, the stakes of auditions and the stakes of performing well when at work
Starting point is 00:30:18 would be so much higher than as kids, we were like, oh, this is great, fuck, I get to take the day off from school and just kind of like playing around. And so the stakes were like, oh, this is great. Fuck, I get to take the day off from school and just kinda like playing around. And so the stakes were lower. It was more fun and so therefore, it wasn't quite as anxiety inducing. Yeah?
Starting point is 00:30:33 Absolutely. I think I grew into that. I think when I was, yeah, you know, when you're little and you're just like, yeah, I can do this and everyone else thinks I can. Oh, my anxiety came later. How about for you? Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:30:44 Of course, it's not to be weird of it, that's definitely just comes with the hormonal surge of like, oh no, do I need to consider having sex now? And I have to consider it, and you're like, well now my life's complete, I'm debilitated. We're life's over. Yeah, it's a lot. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:59 But JB, what age was it JB, because you also had the thing when you were a kid of like providing, so like doing when you were a kid of like providing. So like doing the work was a way of contributing. Yeah, I mean, it was difficult because my parents were also in a position of manager in my career and also in my sister's career. And so they were being compensated for that from us as well.
Starting point is 00:31:21 And so that got complicated because those monies went into you know rent and mortgage and so if we're not working that affects the bottom line for the household. But you didn't know about that you were unaware of that? I did I was keenly aware of it and it was fucking stressful because remember work permits? So what you were just saying wasn't true you did feel like... Well eventually yeah but what at the start, though, at the start, it was all kind of fun and games.
Starting point is 00:31:47 But then as I kind of got into like 14, 15, 16, 17, and school got harder, and you know, remember with work permits, you had, every six months your work permit had to get renewed. And they would renew your work permit based on your grades. You had to hold at least a C average. And that's not difficult, but if you know you have to, it becomes difficult. Especially when you're looking down the barrel of a midterm or final exam where that's a huge percentage of your
Starting point is 00:32:13 grade and I know if I fail this test for some weird reason, now I get fired off the show, all those people are out of work and we got no money coming into the house. Did you find that it was hard to keep your grades up kind of dipping in and out of the curriculum? Because I was really good at cheating. Because when you're on the set doing school, it's only three hours a day. It's just you and the tutor and you can kind of hide a bunch of notes. In college, I would be, my eyes hurt from, I would be in those big lecture halls and
Starting point is 00:32:41 my eyes hurt from cheating because my face would be forward but my eyes would look at the page and I'd be like. And my eyes would, so much pain. Anyway, how are you? You ruined your peripheral vision from cheating. So then, Kristen, so then how old were you when you did the first of the Twilight films? 17. 17.
Starting point is 00:33:03 I mean. Yeah, I'm years old. And talking to the extent, I'll quote Jason, to the extent to which you're comfortable about, like that process of being part of something that's such a global phenomenon and instantly kind of, again, you've been working since you were a kid, you've been around it, but now you're part of something that is so known and so, like it's kind of. Yeah, now you're famous. Yeah, famous in a way that. Can't go out and around.
Starting point is 00:33:29 But also in a way that very few people experience, especially at that kind of rate. Yeah, that was, and also 17 is like the most awkward age ever, it's you're just now starting to be like, oh, I am a woman. And like, yeah, I think I always kind of like was super utilitarian about the job because my parents are crew and I was just like,
Starting point is 00:33:51 yeah, I love this job. It's what I'm gonna do forever. I'm gonna make movies forever. And it's like, it's chill. And then that definitely made things different, yeah. Yeah, I'll bet. But it was, I mean, we have kind of like a cool insulated, like when people ask me about like my high school years
Starting point is 00:34:05 or like my college years, which I didn't do either of, because I'm an idiot. Same. Yeah. Me too. That's like the period of time that I think about. And so it's so weird, because it doesn't feel like I'm referencing myself.
Starting point is 00:34:20 Like I feel like, Really? Talking about a different time, it's like, it's hard for me to relate to that. It's like so personal, I don't see it from the outside. I'm like, well, I was going through, like... It's just so fucking weird to do everything personal publicly. Yeah, it's like, oh, you know who I was dating,
Starting point is 00:34:37 you know exactly what happened. Right. Right, right, right. It's like me saying, where do you live? And you're like, oh, unfortunately, everybody knows where you live. It's like, are you guys asked about your first, like, partners? Every time you do an interview about like, obviously, like the series comes up. It's where I come from. It's like, oh, well, what about that?
Starting point is 00:34:54 And you're like, it's crazy that people are still asking me about that first dude. Well, yeah, you know, I didn't I didn't have that and I didn't go to college either. And I'm the dummy that has like, now I want to ask who is the dude? Like I have no idea. I don't either by the way. Well, you know, it's the proverbial dude. Right, whoever the dude is. But it seems like all you guys in there,
Starting point is 00:35:14 like it was such a phenomenon as I remember, I apologize I have not seen them, everybody got famous really fast. It must have been comforting that you guys each had each other to kind of go through it with, and you could kind of lean on one another, because I seem to remember you guys all got sort of an equal level of fame,
Starting point is 00:35:35 and you could kind of go through it together, I would imagine, that there was some sort of comfort in that? Yeah, totally. I mean, like, we were all so different. I don't know, I think about that. I'm like, the first picture that I ever saw of myself in a newspaper was in the post. It sounds like so old school too. It's like, we open the post and there you are, and the cover smoking weed with your dog. And this is like my boyfriend's family. And they're like from Staten Island
Starting point is 00:36:06 and they're like, what's going on here? And I was like, oh, what is going on here? Like the movie wasn't even out yet. I had never been photographed by a paparazzi in my life. I was like, been acting since I was 10 years old and was like, what the hell? And then like we were, I got in trouble and I was like, oh, I think this is gonna ruin everything.
Starting point is 00:36:24 I'm so sorry. And now weed's legal and I was like, oh, I think this is going to ruin everything. I'm so sorry. And now weed's legal and everything was fine. Right, right. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but I just thought that was such a big deal. Was there a moment there where you considered, like, things would be so, this was fun, but things would be so much easier
Starting point is 00:36:37 if I got back to anonymity, I'm still young enough where I can go to college, I can study another career. I went through that. I was like, is this worth it? And can I sustain a level of success and income? And I can get all the way to the finish line because I gotta decide now.
Starting point is 00:36:57 That makes it worth it. Yeah, these are the years for college. So like, did you go through any of that? I have to say, I felt like at the time that I could have redirected energy and become an academic, I was so hungry for more work because the Twilight series itself took forever. We did it over a four-year period. We made five movies. It's probably more than four years, by the way.
Starting point is 00:37:26 Like, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21. Like, those, I wanted to make other movies at the same time so badly. Yeah. I just sort of crashed and burned and barreled my way through those years and just like, was really, like, lacked any balance. I was just like, I was just working constantly.
Starting point is 00:37:46 Singularly focused, yeah. Yeah, well. And you had your eyes on the end of that tunnel when you're done with your obligation on the franchise, you could start doing other movies that were a little bit more exciting to you? Well, I couldn't, we all kind of, if we were able to like try to like slam one in in between.
Starting point is 00:38:00 And so that was why it was kind of like such a loaded period because we were like either promoting one of these movies Making one of these movies or trying to shove in something that gave you some like variation and not in terms of what it like was like for other people but just so you could like Do something other than play that one part for fucking six years? but then but then at the at the tail end of that did you find yourself like it was was there sort of a moment of like Relief or just like I'm sure it was a great experience, I don't mean in that sense.
Starting point is 00:38:27 I just mean that just the absolute kind of making five films in four years and everything that comes with that and all the exterior pressures and all the... Did you find that moment of like, fuck, where you could just kind of exhale and kind of take a second? Yeah, for sure.
Starting point is 00:38:43 Yeah, yeah. I bet. And then the great news is that you did start to make, you know, films that were, not to disparage those films at all, but films that were very, very different. And it seems a little bit more on your sort of artistic ideals and tastes, for lack of better phrases. I mean, like, your career is just like really fucking exciting.
Starting point is 00:39:07 Especially Spencer, I thought you were just incredible. I know, so, so, so good. I couldn't agree more. Unbelievable. Nice to say all that, thanks. No, truly, I mean, your thought of it is just one of our great actors, you know? And that's like not a lot of people come out of
Starting point is 00:39:22 franchises like that and then get the kind of credibility that you have earned. And so it's just, it's awesome. Well, it feels like, Kristen, like you've had kind of like three careers in such a, or like four, like you've done so many different things. And now you've got this new film coming out that look, like I said, obviously I haven't seen it yet. It was just at Sundance. I can't wait to see it.
Starting point is 00:39:44 Right? How is the reception at Sundance. I can't wait to see it. Right? How was the reception at Sundance? It must have been awesome. It was really fun. It was cool because I hadn't done like a, I think we, what was called like a midnight screening and I was nervous because I follow the sleep in movies past 7 p.m. like no matter what.
Starting point is 00:40:02 And I was like, we have to screen our movie. Like everyone's going to be sleepy and I was like we have to screen our movie like everyone's gonna be sleepy and Sick and like altitude sick and like it was just like a cesspool Everyone's just caught I was just like this is not the time to screen the movie, but it was like it was like Like a real a rumpus room I just couldn't believe it I was like everyone is like fully engaged and like standing up and clapping during parts of me I was like this is I haven't fucking hung out in a theater in this way and forever. Oh wow We'll be right back
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Starting point is 00:44:56 early and ad-free with Wondery+. All right, back to the show. So what are you, what's the kind of stuff that you do look for now because you have, like you are kind of doing lots of different kinds of films and so as you kind of think about what, what's, you know, you know, the things that, that, that attract you, the things that, that excite you in terms of filming, like what are the things that are out there you're like, fuck, I wanna do that. It's so hard to answer that all the time,
Starting point is 00:45:32 you know what I mean, especially as an actor, you're like, you know it when you see it and then you feel like a crazy person because you'll just do anything to make it happen, but then before you see it, you're just sort of floating in this liminal, like, I wanna want something. But we're kind of starting to... I'm really gunning... I mean, like, you know, it's not the first I've mentioned it. I've been sort of like sending out this like siren song about wanting to make this movie based on one of my favorite books. And I'm pretty sure...
Starting point is 00:46:03 I'm pretty sure at some point in the next like week or two it's gonna be something that I can say I am doing this and we are going to make this now because we have monies to do so, but it's so hard to get monies for small movies. Yeah. But this is not the film you're directing though, right? This is different from the film that you're directing? This is the one I'm trying to direct.
Starting point is 00:46:21 This is the one you're trying to direct. Okay, so you have talked about it. This is, this is Chronology of Water. Yeah. Yeah, it's been a long time. Would that be the first film that you direct? Yeah. First feature.
Starting point is 00:46:32 Yeah, first feature. Oh my God, how exciting. I was gonna get to that, JB, because both of you guys, again, there's similarity. You grew up in it, you were around it, your parents were in it, and your mom was a script supervisor and you've made a load of films and done it really well. It makes sense that you would want to direct.
Starting point is 00:46:46 I mean, what is the draw, Kristen? Like, are you attracted to the sort of holistic sort of four corners, you know, you gotta do it all kind of thing, as opposed to just the acting lane and playing a character? Because that's kind of what's the draw for me, and more interface with the crew. I feel like on movies that I really love making,
Starting point is 00:47:13 you get to be a part of the crew, and directors that let you into that process. It's like, it doesn't always happen, but sometimes you're sort of like, we're all making this. Even though there's clearly somebody who spearheads and obviously the perspective that's being maintained comes from a singular place, it still feels like everyone's hand is in a balanced way
Starting point is 00:47:34 supporting the weight of that. And so as an actor, I always feel like the director's in the scene with me, or at least, or I don't always, but when it's good, I feel like we've done it. I don't know, there's an exchange and I just want to step onto the other side of it and be like, it's the same, it's not the same job. There's an element of it that's sort of like kickstarting someone's engine and I just know I will be so good at that. Like I just know how to get people going and like, or not peep, I know
Starting point is 00:48:01 how to give you a, I mean like actor, like if you're doing anything real, it happens and you can do that while not being on camera and I just can't wait to sort of like take care of someone and sort of set them on a path. I'm thinking about one person in particular and one movie in particular now, so I just like, I want so badly to just like preserve this path that this girl is on
Starting point is 00:48:22 and I wanna see what she does with all of my ideas. I want to see how she makes them better. I want to like, I just want to, I want to know how to look at things. I want to, I'm always, I'm always thinking like the camera should be in a different place. I'm like, you're not seeing this. Trust me. I know I'm not being received. Like I just, I can't wait to put something together from the very bottom to the top and just. And have a, have a plan and communicate that plan to a team and be a motivator and just, I got you guys, here's what we're gonna do and just maybe trust me if you're not seeing it, you will and like, are you like that in other parts of your life?
Starting point is 00:48:57 Like, are you the one that comes up with the great idea for where we're gonna throw the party or where we're gonna go to dinner and who should be at the dinner, where they should sit. Like are you a good planner like that? Taipei. Yeah, I'm like a total control freak. I'm like if I could just design everything all the time. Truly?
Starting point is 00:49:14 I have to hold myself back from being like, this is what everyone should do. Yeah, but I feel like the control freak, I know you're being sort of self-effacing there, but it does kind of get a bad rap. We have to come up with a better term than control freak because it's such a pejorative when really it's like- Well you're like a fucking rebel rouser.
Starting point is 00:49:34 You're like somebody who's like, let's go man, like follow me. I got an idea, you're gonna love- What's your sign? Check this out, I'm a Capricorn. Oh yeah. Which is not great for collaboration, but I'm working on it.
Starting point is 00:49:47 I recently was, I was like, I was hitting, I was at, do you guys, does anyone play golf? You guys seem like someone. I do, oh my God. Oh hell yeah, let's go. Will and I have a sickness. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Me too, but it's so, I'm like fully,
Starting point is 00:50:00 I totally fucked up my ring finger because there's this bump on it that I hate so much, but it's not going to go anywhere. Fucking what, hang on. what are you talking about? What are you talking about? Are you serious golfer? I have made a hole in motherfucking one Kristen Stewart we're making news today. This is never had a hole in one. I hate you I've been playing Jason shot a 70 not fair Jason shot a 70 last week a one under it was whoo I've never I've never shot a par, I mean, on single holes, but I've never parred any course, like not even the one that I live next to,
Starting point is 00:50:34 which is weird, like it's like the Bermuda Triangle because I've like birdie, birdie, birdied, and then just like fucking shit the bed and like ruined it. I'm just like, wah! Are you naturally gifted or have you studied this? Have you taken lessons? My dad taught me how to swing when I was little and then I didn't play until the pandemic
Starting point is 00:50:51 and then I started playing all the time. That's what we did. And then so wait, so you're out there at public courses there, you're going to like Wilson Harding and- Balboa? Yeah. Have you not? Oh my gosh. Wait. What is that?
Starting point is 00:51:05 She's showing us a... Listener, she's showing us the seal from the local public golf course. Yeah, the par three down the street. As a tattoo on your form. You are a badass. Wow, that is so... It's big too. I really went in.
Starting point is 00:51:19 Me and my friends finished up and we had this great game and we had a bunch of beers and we were like, let's go. We're best friends. We'll be best friends forever. But honestly, these are my best girls. But wait a second, you got that tattoo after a few beers? Because I was literally just scouting today a tattoo place here in the East Village
Starting point is 00:51:34 and I said to the guy, I said, what are your hours? He usually goes, well, you know, you're supposed to stay open till about two in the morning, but they get too many drunks in here that want tattoos. And then they come back the next day and they say, hey, can you take this off? Where's the eraser? And so I started shutting down around seven or eight o'clock
Starting point is 00:51:45 because you're not supposed to get a tattoo with a little buzz on, but you did. No, no, because it like thins your blood and you don't make, you know, choice choices. But he was a friend of a friend and he's an idiot. And so here we are. But I still like it. I don't know if I've made bad decisions at drinking.
Starting point is 00:52:01 Let me think about it. Wait, Kristen, I really want to play golf with you one day. I'm going to get a hold of you, and one day I'm going to take you out to... JB's out of town. Kristen, you can come play with me, because he's not at the club right now, but I can come play with you.
Starting point is 00:52:17 Yeah, I'm going to retire from golf until October. Well, after you guys golf, Kristen, I read somewhere a while ago that you like cooking. I love cooking. But wait, Sean, you can't change the fucking subject. what else we're gonna talk about golf for you swing the ball Dude you can't just Hijack the conversation you get really hungry playing golf like we just have dinner Yeah, that's I'm saying chili burgers or whatever now you're speaking
Starting point is 00:52:40 Have you just been playing the public courses or have you gone around to the all the country clubs, too? I've been taken to like courses or have you gone around to all the country clubs too? I've been taken to like one or two really fancy courses. It's a completely different vibe of... It is, right? Yeah, there's some good and some bad. Oh, you don't like middle-aged white guys? I like you guys.
Starting point is 00:52:57 Yeah, but pervasively I will say sort of on the whole. Yeah, it's pretty... Ah! Anyway, that's so cool. That's so, so, so, so, so, so cool that you do that and we can't wait to play with you. Shawnee, a food question? Yeah. Yes.
Starting point is 00:53:14 So do you cook with butter or oil? Oh, actually it's very weird that you asked that because last night I made a pomodoro and I used a bunch of butter and I was like, I know you're kind of a bit of a cheat, but if you like emulsify shit out of it and it gets all frothy and amazing and you like me so it was really incredible. But this morning I thought you could probably do that with olive oil and it would be just it would be different, maybe less rich, but you still could get that frothy kind of...
Starting point is 00:53:45 Right, Sean? Sean, does your chef agree? Or, I mean, do you agree? It's all about that pasta water. But wait, why would one want to go with olive oil instead of butter? Because it's healthier or different taste? Well, it's also a little more Italian to use oil than butter. Because at least in America, with the butter... Please, take one coffee.
Starting point is 00:54:03 I like the oil. But wait, are you... Are you Italian guys also taking your coffee? American with the bad Are you one of those people because of Your self-described kind of control freak like you said do you cook for all your friends and like groups of people like do you? Like to command the kitchen Yeah, yeah, I did Thanksgiving this year. Oh, you did? By yourself? How'd that go? Me and my girlfriend did it. Like, and then people brought stuff,
Starting point is 00:54:31 and it was so annoying because we were so inundated with food, and mine was, like, ours was really great, and then we had all these, like, dishes sort of muddying the waters, and I was like, what is all this bullshit? Yeah. Which is... And their shitty pots and their tacky pans. Again, it's not control freak, it's Dream Maker.
Starting point is 00:54:48 I think it's Dream Maker. Did you do the turkey and everything? Yeah. I hear that's not easy. I have a, I really figured it out. You have to get it in pieces. To do the whole thing is really difficult. But if you get it in different pieces
Starting point is 00:55:04 and the neck and back are, it's really gnarly to talk about meat and stuff. Like to do the whole thing is really difficult. But if you get it in different pieces and then like the neck and back, it's really gnarly to talk about meat in this way. But are like detached and get that dry brain going. And so it's like all encrusted. So you've done this before? Yeah. Wow.
Starting point is 00:55:19 Now, how did you get the cooking bug? Did mom or dad cook when you were growing up? Oh yeah, they did a bit. I'm just like, I'm kind of a stoner and I'm just really food obsessed, so like. You get a little snacky and you want something nice. Yeah, and I like playing in the kitchen. But do you guys cook too?
Starting point is 00:55:36 Yeah, well I started baking because I started with a cheesecake and I was like, I want, because I want a piece of cheesecake. His cheesecake is so good by the way. And so I'm sitting there craving a piece of cheesecake and I'm like, I want because I want a piece of cheesecake. His cheesecake is so good, by the way. And so I'm sitting there craving a piece of cheesecake. I'm like, well, why don't I just get off my ass and make it? So I just made it.
Starting point is 00:55:51 It's so good. Because the chef didn't show up yet. She usually shows up at four or five. Sean's doing real well, Kristen. Do you ever make shit food like Slappy Joe's? I make Slappy Joe's a lot too. Yeah, I have like, I'm definitely low and high. You're just making fun of the slob.
Starting point is 00:56:09 No, no, wait, you have low and high, is that what you said? Yeah, like I like to be fancy and also like, you know, scuzzy. You go low and high. We have sloppy joes, scuzzy. How are you, now, you know, Sean is in great shape, he's a beautiful man, super handsome,
Starting point is 00:56:24 but he does have his little cookie pouch. And that's from all of the fun food that he eats. Why do you have no cookie pouch, Kristen? You're talking like... I have a cookie pouch. No, no, no. I guess what I'm getting to is you don't have like a huge workout regimen that offsets. Like you don't work out so that you can eat. I mean, I have gotten, as I've grown into a reasonable adult
Starting point is 00:56:48 who's not a total shit show, I actually do exercise and like cook healthy food and try not to eat the meat. And like, I've incorporated some, it's like, I'm either eating sloppy joes and like drinking Coors and playing Los Feliz three times a day, or I am working out constantly and cooking meat. Right, and depriving yourself yummy stuff for a week or two.
Starting point is 00:57:13 Yeah, or just, I don't know, I kind of like going all in on whatever I'm going in on. Me too, there's no grip. What is your sign, for Christ's sake? Aries. In fact, I was recently at the golf course and this dude that I see all the time there who used to be an actor, he sent us a screenplay of his.
Starting point is 00:57:28 He's an older man. He's really actually super hot because he's like, he drives this lime green, like hand-painted Honda and like plays guitar out the back, offers a beer and a sock. I was like, no. A beer and a sock? But what are you doing? Yeah, he was like, you want one? Justin Theroux is there?
Starting point is 00:57:44 That's crazy. He gave you a? Yeah. He's like, you want one? Justin Theroux is there? That's crazy. He gave you a script and you took it? I gave him my email address. Yeah. I was like, you must send this to me. Good person. But he's cool. And he sent he like sang these songs to me and my friends about our signs. And mine was I it's, man, what is this guy? It's totally like Google, he's on YouTube.
Starting point is 00:58:07 But he sang this song called I Am, I Am, I Am the Ram, and all the verses are about I will lead the charge, but also how completely fucking egotistical and arrogant and ridiculous and sort of like. Yeah, so you're not gonna get people like that bothering you up at the country clubs. That's the thing. This is like, I prefer this. We can hang out. Exactly. But it was like really good.
Starting point is 00:58:35 Like, he really got me and he really like nailed. He really like nailed all my attributes. And so, yeah, like the ram thing. Yeah, it is. I'm surprised. What's what's the animal for a Capricorn? Goat, maybe? See, we have these like annoying horns. We're like these silly little animals with big horns.
Starting point is 00:58:53 Yeah, yeah, I don't like it. All right, we're gonna let you go, but what is your last meal you could have being a foodie if you had to call in one last meal. Is it a pizza? I think for me it would be fries and a pizza, I think. Would it be dessert? Kristen, would it be like a dessert type thing
Starting point is 00:59:15 or would it be like? No, I'd go pizza over, yeah. I like the food more. You like salt more than sugar? Primarily, I think so, yeah. But then sometimes you just get... Yeah, sometimes I get a little crazy. No, yeah, I would say probably pizza.
Starting point is 00:59:32 I think maybe like... So like pizza, beer, golf and then video games. That's a perfect Christmas to a day. You just need a van and you're all set. I'm not a gamer. I wish that I was. I'm jealous of people who are into sports and video games. What's your... If you're not playing golf,
Starting point is 00:59:50 but you're drinking beer, what are you doing if you're not playing golf? Like, are you watching shitty TV or are you... I like to play pool and cook and golf and read and make movies. And that's it. Fuck. That's it. By the way, that's it. That's it. By the way, that's plenty. That's plenty, that's pretty good too. It's a pretty solid line up. You don't really?
Starting point is 01:00:11 Yeah, it's really good, it's really, really good. Sean, what's your last meal? What would you do? Spaghetti all day long. Spaghetti? Yeah. And vanilla ice cream. Christ.
Starting point is 01:00:21 Drinking ice cream, that really got me. That was really funny. Oh, Christ. Kristen, sure, we kept you way too long. You're the greatest. We don't deserve your time. What a pleasure. Yeah, seriously.
Starting point is 01:00:33 I'm coming after you for some golf. Don't be shocked when I show up. Thank you guys for letting me hang out. You guys just all hang out and talk for an hour, and then you put it on the internet. That's such a weird thing to do. We do that with my friends. We'll talk about your movie too.
Starting point is 01:00:49 We'll say your movie again too. We were so bad about promoting. I can't wait. Did we get a date on it yet? Yeah, when is it? I actually do know this. It is coming out on March 8th. March 8th.
Starting point is 01:01:01 I think, or maybe that's, it's coming out in the beginning of March. It's a spring release y'all. Go see it. She's's something. It's coming out in the beginning of March. It's a spring release, y'all. Go see it. She's in it. She's great. It's Love, Wise, Bleeding. It's Kristen Stewart. The great Kristen Stewart. We don't do this often, but... We're going to give you a round.
Starting point is 01:01:15 Golf clap. Same to you. We're going to give you a golf clap. Thank you, Kristen. So nice to meet you. Thank you for today. Thanks, Kristen Stewart. You were great. You guys, thank you so much. That was really fun. Thank you for today.
Starting point is 01:01:25 And done. The great Kristen Stewart. There's so much, I wish I had her street cred. She's cool, she's happening. The fact that she plays golf is just such a great sort of counterbalance to that. Like, I think it gives golf a great name. You know, it's like, even if you have cool people... Because you think golf is uncool. Well, listen, it does not have a long history of being street creddy.
Starting point is 01:01:58 So you get some cool person like her playing golf, it's great for the sport. I agree, but at the same time, I will say this, like, who gives a shit? I wonder if she wants to go to the Dinosaur Golf. I mean, who gives a shit what people think. What's that, Seanny? She's going to become the new Dinosaur Golf. She's the new Dinosaur.
Starting point is 01:02:13 What we got to do is we got to convince her to come to one of these Pro-Ams with us. Yeah, exactly. You know, and we'll... It'd be a great get. Yeah, well, and maybe on one of her golf trips, she seems like a super fun hang Well, the AT&T maybe gets the celebs back. Maybe next year. Mr. Steve John the great Steve John great Steve John
Starting point is 01:02:32 Will will invite Kristen? Yeah But and then on top of that we forget the fact that she's like Academy Award nominated Cesar We're not just who's done like she's done everything from like it's very it's not not rare but it's rarefied air of being somebody who's been part of like massive franchises and then done all these like really cool uh art house films uh you know that have her co-star would be would be one of the one of the few that robert patinson had had a a similar um similar thing yeah not fortunate, because that takes away from their talent, but both of them were able to find some projects that facilitate that transition for them.
Starting point is 01:03:12 Yeah, post that. Because like Downey, you could say, but Downey came into it with a huge body of work before he started getting into the Marvel stuff. But really to start as a young actor and come out of that kind of a machine. Hunger Games, didn't Jennifer Lawrence, was she in Hunger Games? Yeah. But really to start as a young actor and come out of that kind of machine. Hunger Games, didn't Jennifer Lawrence?
Starting point is 01:03:27 Jennifer Lawrence? Yeah, she transitioned well. Great Jennifer Lawrence, you're right. But there have been a few, but it's still rare. Yeah, it's on one hand. You should get her to play golf because you know... Here it comes guys, here it comes. Get ready. Why does it feel like you're reading?
Starting point is 01:03:42 No, no, I'm not. I'm just saying, because, you know, when... God, he can't... He's so proud of it. Go ahead. Golfers sometimes yell that thing at the golf ball, right? Like an announcer will say, like, she's gonna have to get this one to blank, right? If she's gonna... Right? Like when they hit the ball and it's in flight, they go,
Starting point is 01:04:00 oh, you gotta... Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Okay. We will Bite. Bite. Bite. Okay, we will allow. Judges will allow. You think we'll allow that?
Starting point is 01:04:09 Bite. Bite. No, I will say this, that particular one actually bites. Nice, nice punch up, Willie. Bye. Bye, everybody. Smart. Blast.
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