SmartLess - "Macaulay Culkin"

Episode Date: December 29, 2025

Join us for a hero’s journey with the great Macaulay Culkin. Find your light, hit your marks, systematically sabotage the Wet Bandits. It’s Magic v. Sexy v. Naughty… on an all-new SmartLess. Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of SmartLess ad-free and a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Are you good at watching the holiday movies, the cartoons? I do because it's nostalgic, it makes me feel like where I put my onesie on, you know, with the feet, the whole, the pajamas. Yeah. Do you have a little, do you have the little, the button sort of window that drops in the back for poops? Don't beat around the bush. What are you trying to say? Do you have a back flap or do you have to? Yeah, but that's not my jeans. You're talking about my pajamas. Have you watched any of the holiday videos or movies? Not yet, but I'm going to.

It's going to be so exciting. Do you want to come over and watch them? Yeah, you came over last time. I guess we've got to come over to your place this time. Yeah, tip for tat. Tip for tat. Yeah. Splitety Splat.

Welcome to a new episode. Smart less. Smart. Smart. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. Jesus Christ, Sean. Fucking hell, Sean.

This is fucking bullshit. It wasn't on the, it wasn't on my calendar. Whoa, that's our fault. Yeah, don't say it like it's our fault. Who's in control of your calendar? Is it Nick the prick? Yeah. Did you get a deal on Nick?

By the way, Sean, he says fucking Nick. He didn't even know who Nick was. I mean, Nick for years has just been. We literally said, did we call Nick? And he goes, what's a Nick? Who's Nick? No, he said, what's a Nick? Yeah. What's a Nick?

Oh, God. Like a discount assistant? We were about to call Cedars because we thought, have you checked the paddle waiting room for pounds? That's the worst feeling in the world. This guy's like, I'm like, what are you talking about? Okay, Will, let's take a couple of, oh, sorry, Will, do you want to finish you on that? Yeah. Okay.

Fucking Will Arnett, this guy. Wait, how are you guys? No, no. No, not yet. You already did that? You already did that? Let's take a guess of what we interrupted in Sean's life. What was going on?

What were you doing? Spaghetti. No. Sorry, well, no, it's first thing in the morning, so that seemed like the most likely. He was turning the Pop-Tart over in the oven. I'm going to tell you right now, the honest guy truth,

cast out sleeping. Okay. Because you got up too early. Shurning butter, a surprise guest is guest. Our surprise guest is real lippy. By the way, since you've been away, Sean, our surprise guest has been very active in the chat, which has been fun.

All right, good. I'm a big Olivia Munn fan and a fun lady. Yeah, okay. Okay, do you want to guess? No, but let's get back to Shawnee. So what happened? So how was your sleep?

What was your sleep? I got up in three. And then I wrote, and then I had the script that I had to write notes on. So I spent like three or four hours rereading it, rereading it, rereading it, and writing notes on it and stuff like that.

And then I was like, oh, God, I got to go back to sleep. And then I, Scott was like, hey, you have a smart list. I'm like, what? And I jumped out of bed. You should smell my bird. breath.

Oh, I'm good. Oh. Hey, so what's the process when we're done here? Nick gets what, a phone call or you want an in-person? Yeah, no. I'm definitely going to ask what happened. No, I, yeah, that's it. And my niece is here with her friends.

So there's five girls staying in the house. Oh my God, it's there. So we're up late. Let's bring them in and have them smell your breath. Can we do that? So wait, this is the daughter. of who this is my brother dennis's daughter alice and i remember her name because it rhymes with niece oh that's a big deal that you remember the name of your niece yeah hey jason this is not a road

you want to go down right sorry um yeah hey so how old is elise um she's just turned 24 she just turned 24 take this sharpness out of your voice yeah i know he's so mad at me but he won't show it she's having a five person sleepover at uncle sean's house yeah yeah it's It's fun. Yeah. Did they get, did they climb into a bottle of something last night? Yes, they did, yeah. These girls.

These girls? They're really funny, though, but, you know, they're, like, in the middle of dinner last night. Like, they'll say the most random things. Are they crazy? They're crazy. I'm going to tell you something. Right in the middle of, we were talking about politics or drinking or something. And her friend, Taylor goes, um.

Oh, Taylor. That's probably taste. You don't, don't get me started on Taylor at a dinner. Was she there? Taylor at a dinner with politics? She must have... She goes, in the middle of the thing, she goes, oh my God, you guys,

did you hear Jesse Eisenberg is going to give away one of his kidneys to a stranger? I mean, that's unbelievable. By the way, that's the best part, that's the whole story of... And then she goes, oh my God, you guys, he's so nice.

By the way, I didn't know Jesse Eisenberg was giving away a kidney to a stranger. Hang on a second. Let's get back to Taylor's comment. I mean, and that's it. Was she wearing that cute thing that, what was that? Hey, so wait, so Jesse, I don't, I don't believe for one second that Jesse Eisenberg is giving away a kidney to a stranger. Yeah, that's not just some sort of, I didn't, it's in the news.

Really? Yeah, it was in the news. And they have that, and they go, I didn't know. You guys, oh my God, Ed Sharon didn't use the phone. And then Elis goes, oh, he's so mysterious. And then I'm like. And then I'm like, they all really talk like that. And like, what?

This is really happening. Where are they from? Chicago, Glenn Ellen. So they all flew in. Well, they all know, now one lives in New York, but they all live in the Chicagoland area and they all decided to fly in for her birthday. It was nice. It's fun.

It's nice of you to host them. But Jason, this is what people do for family and this is what people do. It's selfless. Her uncle is rich and famous and lives in Hollywood, and so they're going to go out there and stay in his mansion.

That makes sense. What part of that do you not get? For how long? Are these strangers going to be in your house? It's his niece. They are going to be here for two or three more days. How long have they been there already? They're total of five days.

That is a long day. Do you know the other girls' names? Yes. Taylor, Ainsley, Lily. Oh, shoot. And the new one. This is fun. Wait.

And Alondra. Alondra. Alondra. Catherine and Julie are surprised guests just threw in the show. I was close. What did she, what did the guests say?

Julie and Julie, I was close. I was close. Oh my God, all right. Let's get to, who is this person? This is the most fun guest. Sean, I'm really excited that we're catching you in this. This is the rawest we've ever seen you.

I'm a nervous because I, yeah. No, I know. You are nervous because you just feel you're out of sorts. You're just waking up. You're raw. and I haven't seen you this raw since fill in the blank so

no that was the name of the bar they had to close it down for health reasons but fill in the blank by the way gross title yeah are you guys going to meet it

fill in the black later our our guest our guest our guest has been active in the film business for many years dare I say

say most of his life and not just adult life most of his life life so Jason this is going to be somebody that you can identify with this is Kurt Russell but this is somebody who's been doing it for so long and who reached such incredible heights

of fame as a young person and has continued to work throughout it's been incredible started in films like Rocket Gibraltar born in the 4th of July then movies started to have more success in bigger roles and in movies like Uncle Buck, Jacob's Ladder,

and then absolutely went through the stratosphere with Home Alone, Home Alone, too, Rich and Rich, and then, it's McCauley. It's McCulley. Welcome to the show. You were on my list as well. Oh my God, this is so cool. He's appropriately dressed in Smartless PJs.

Oh, yes, of course, yes. McCauley, I'm so sorry I was late. So many apologies. I'm never. Yeah, it's too late for that. He just, no, I mean, just Taylor, when Taylor gets going, and then just forget it.

You know what I mean? Just let her off the leash, I swear. I don't know if you heard about Ed Shearin, but it's so mysterious. Macaulay, Colkin. My Godly. Where are we finding you today? I'm in Los Angeles, yeah.

Yeah? Oh, what part? I live in Toluca Lake. Oh, Loua Lake. I've done a lot of time there. I like it. Make it sound like a prison, you know. No.

I spend it a lot of time there. Yeah, I love it there. They got one of the greatest. golf clubs in all of America there at Lakeside. Yeah. Do you golf, McColley? No, no, but I'm investing in a golf cart. We'll put it that way.

So you can tool around the neighborhood? Yeah, pretty much. For real? Yeah, you know, because you've got a Jones. You know, everyone has a golf cart, so you don't have Jones, you know. By the way, you know what's interesting, Sean? I was going to say, McCauley, what's interesting is that you're an Angelino now, perhaps. You live in Los Angeles, but you're a New Yorker, and yet you played a character who's so closely

identified with Chicago. Yes. So you've kind of really covered the whole country. You belong to America. I mean, do you say that? That's well put, yes. But I love how a New Yorker is like a Chicago, like, you know, they love me there. I swear to God, I do gangboosters over there.

Do you? In Chicago? In Chicago? Yeah, Sean, hang on, Sean. Hang on, Sean, hang on. She said Chicago. Sean's also done some time there. Yeah.

Every time we mentioned, yeah, go ahead. Do you want to just get it over with? And then we can move on to other things. Yeah. So when I was a kid. and I was in high school, John Hughes was making all of his movies in, as you know, in and around Chicago, right?

Yes, of course you remember. He's very aware. I was there. So it was wild to grow, I've said this before, it was wild to grow up in the town where he was making the movies and then when I'm in high school, those movies came out about high school.

So it was all encompassed John Hughes all the time all around Chicago show. Sean, who did you identify with? Is it Ducky? By the way, I got called Ducky all the time. All the time. I did because I dressed like him and everything. Yeah.

Did you ever see them shooting around the neighborhood, Sean? No, but no, but Lucas, you know, was filmed in my high school. And if you remember that movie, Lucas, anybody? Yes, yes. Charlie Sheen and, yeah, yeah. Charlie Sheen, yeah, we're known to writer's first film. That was a great little movie, actually, Lucas. I like that film.

I was an extra. I was like 14 years old. Anyway, who cared? Did you sit in a background holding? You're all on a foldout? Were you late to that? And that little boy. Did you think through that?

That nobody wanted. That's right. That's right. Jason, what I thought you were going to say is, are you excited for the release? because we're going to talk about it later of Zootopia 2. Yes, very much so. Yes. Me and Brenda are taking a bite of the forbidden fruit. We're playing brother and sister. Miao. Wow. Yeah. Oh, boy. Wait, who is? I mean, my lady. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm going to be at the premiere. Now, which, what animal is your character?

We are playing cats. That meow is literal, yeah. Jason, what are you? Jason, you're a fox, right? Thanks, man. You had that one in the chamber. McCauley, you're in Zootopia and Jason, you didn't know which character he was. To be honest, had no idea McCauley was in it.

Yeah, yeah. No, are you kidding? This is animation. Yeah, they don't let anybody know anything. Willie, tell them I'm wrong. I honestly don't even know what the film is about. I didn't know what the first film was about. I didn't know until I saw it.

I have had those moments, this is so embarrassing. But like Jason, where somebody goes, hey, you run into someone, they go, hey, we're doing the thing. And you go, no way. By the way, this is when it's done. This is not going into it. It's typical of animation.

It's done. You just go in and you kind of, yeah. You record your scenes, you know, a la carte over the period of a couple of years. Had you done a bunch of animated stuff, McCauley, before? Yeah, yeah. Back in the early 90s, like everyone else, I had a Saturday morning cartoon. You know, I remember they gave one to, I remember they gave one to Roseanne Bard, John Candy had Camp Candy. They had a Bobby's World, Howie Mandel.

That's right. Louis Anderson had his own Saturday morning cartoon. That's right. Give it away, like, like, candy. Saturday morning cartoons, you guys, was everything for me when I was throwing up. Me too, me too, man. I love that. It was so, we're a little bit older than you were McCauley,

but you probably also remember that feeling of the Saturday morning cartoon. Oh, heck yeah, no, look forward to it. I'm raising my kids with like Saturday morning cartoons. Like, it's like, yeah, it's just on YouTube now, but like, yeah, it's a thing. Exactly, just on YouTube. And what was great about it back then was that we only, you only got it on Saturday. So it just wasn't available 24-7, so it felt really smooth. It was appointment television.

Yeah, so certainly. Yeah, yeah. Wait, all right. So, Macaulay, we're going to roll it all the way back like we like to do. We're going to get right to the beginning because you did start, like I said, when you were, as everybody, a lot of people know, that you started very young acting. And not unlike our friend Jason Bateman. What was the age? What was the age at which you decided or you got you and your family decided like, I'm going to do this?

Was this predetermined, or were you... Did you seek it? What was the thing that started, that said, hey, I'm going to, we should do this? It was actually, it was my father. He was going to take my older brother and sister, and he was going to take, like, headshots of them in the park, and it was, and then my mom was kind of just like,

oh, just take Mac with you. Like, you know, I think she just wanted a break. And, yeah, I just started booking right away. I started out earning everyone else pretty fast. Wow. Through commercials and stuff, do you mean? You know, it was more, I did, like, Black Box Theater in Manhattan, and I got written up for that.

And then, honestly, I just, I jumped pretty much straight to film. I did a couple of commercials here and there, but, like, literally out of the gate, it was Black Box Theater and then cinema. So, am I right, that Rocket Gibraltar was your first film? Yeah, yeah. That was actually Bert Lancaster is one of his last movies. Wow, that.

They hired a bunch of New York stage actors, and I was a, you know, stage actor. And it was, like, who's like Bill Pullman, Patricia Clarkson. Spacey was in it and stuff like that. Uh-oh, yeah. I didn't... I was just saying, uh-oh. What was your... What was that life your first experience on a film set?

How old were you? Did you remember? I was six. Wow. Yeah, no, honestly, it was... I just knew whatever... Memorize your lines, don't look in the camera. You know, find your light, hit your marks, things like that.

It was pretty straight forward for me. You know, but Sean's still trying to nail that down. No, but that's what blows my mind when young kids, yourself, and how do they know to do that? Like, there's so many kids that can't do that. Did your parents give you that? Yeah. I mean, yeah, pretty much, you know, like a, you know, when you're a kid, you're a fast learner.

And wasn't the draw, was the draw the same for you as it was for me? It was just like, basically, I get to skip school. That's all I was looking at. You know, as it went on, for me, as it went on, it was actually the opposite. Because I was always away, and I didn't like, and you have to remember, A lot of my work when I was, you know, pretty much when I was younger, I never worked with people my own age. I was always working with adults like that.

So, like, yeah. So if anything, I kind of had a yearning to, like, go to school, to, like, you know, have contemporaries and things like that. And did you ever? Yeah. Once I quit, I quit when I was 14. Yeah. Quit for, like, nearly a decade.

And, yeah, no, just, just went to school, went to high school, you know, fell in love, got, you know, got, you know, got, you know, got drunk for the first time, things like that. Yeah. What was that like? I mean, because you had, as I pointed out, we all know, you had incredible success. First of all, Uncle Buck, it's just an absolute gem of a film.

It holds up. I watch it like once a year. It kills me. You have great taste. And I know you were part of that John Candy documentary, too, about, right? Yeah, that was lovely. Yeah, no, it really was a good tribute to him. It really did him justice.

They were actually trying to track me down for a while, and I just kind of kept on just going, yeah, I'll get around to it, and just never did. And finally, yeah, finally they tracked me down and on the carpet when they did the premiere. I talked to Colin Hanks. He was the one who directed it?

And I said, who was harder to track down me or Bill Murray? He goes, you. He didn't even blink. Wow. Really? So what was John Candy like? Because I've always just, that guy to me is just such a giant.

Yeah, no, he was sweet. He was very giving. You know, they always say don't work with kids or animals, you know, but he was actually really good with me. Yeah, he was very sweet. I did three films with him because he was also in Home Alone and also I had a brief part in Only the Lonely.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Now, McCalley, when you took your 10-year hiatus, was there an expectation that your spot would be held for you in line? Or were you at that point where you were like, I don't really care if I come back to this industry? I was Dunskys. I was full, I was done.

Like, yeah, yeah. I was like, I hope you all made your money because there's no more coming from me. Yeah, I made my name, I made my mark, I made my fortune. Like, so I don't, you know, like, the only reason why I even, like, do it now is because I like to do it, you know, it's the, you know, it's a, what is it,

pay, pleasure, prestige. That's the only reason to do a gig. Technically, I'm retired right now. Like, I retire, and then if I find something I like, I unretired do that, and I immediately retire afterward. Every gig is my last. He just, Shod just acts like he's retired. He's not retired, but he just sleeps in.

He does whatever he wants. When you were not acting and you were going through high school and then hitting the college years, was there a thought to study a different industry? Was there an interest poll anywhere? Not necessarily. I was kind of just drifting around and try to figure out kind of what I wanted out of life and so forth.

I mean, listen, this was a calling that found me. I didn't find it. And so I wanted to explore that in a different kind of way. on my terms? Well, talk about that because I went through a very similar thing where it was just like, well, I'm young enough to really start over

and at something that I can sort of drive a little bit more. I can have much more say in my longevity and my relevance and my access in any other career, any other occupation, any other industry. Did you want to do something else, J.B.? I did. I desperately wanted to do something

that I could count on, that I wasn't so nervous about main maintaining employment in. And so, you know, I got another job before I ever fully went into, you know, studying something else. But was that, was that a part of your thinking at all, Macaulay? Was there, tell us about that, about just thinking about going forward and providing. I mean, I was in a position where I could just put my thumb up my butt and play video

games all day long. Yeah, I could do anything I want. Yeah, and so... There was enough employment before you quit at 14 to cover you for the rest of your life? Indeed. Oh, great. Wow.

That was not my case. But there was that... Maybe that Hogan's Family Bank? No, it wasn't enough. No, you did okay. I mean, you know, we were... I was spending too much. I was having fun, you know.

On what? On just like basically, catching up. Yeah. And we will be right back. And now back to the show. So McCaulay, but you know, it's funny, you use the expression, you said, you know, there's no more money to be made off me or something like that, which I, which I wonder, like,

when you did quit and you were 14, was there a sense of like that, that you had, was there a sense of resentment towards people who had made money off you in a way? Wade? No, no. I mean, I got the lion's share of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it was also, it was kind of a rat race. Like, it was, I remember when I stopped having fun, I wanted to kind of, I wanted to take a break. And I said, I was getting really taxed. And, uh, and it's like, yeah, I just kind of want to do like a semester of school, you know, that kind of thing. And, um, I was not heard. And that was something that really affected me and affected my work and stuff like that. And then it was just like, oh, I'm on. on the hamster wheel and I can't get off. And so once I had some autonomy and some agency in my life, I grabbed it with both hands. But that's a big burden for a kid of 14.

First of all, it's kind of a big realization for a kid of 14 to be able to actually listen to yourself and go, hey, this doesn't feel great and the people that I'm trusting, I'm trying to tell people this is how I feel and they're not necessarily recognizing that. there's got to be I can imagine I can only sort of try to imagine

how I would feel if I felt like there must be a frustration in there a little bit I'm not by the way I'm not trying to push you into a position I'm just curious no no I mean I was definitely frustrated like yeah and it was again it was kind of just like yeah once I had the chance to get off it was like cool and I said I'll just figure it all out later

you know yeah I'll just that's kind of what I did you know and I imagine that were you like other child actors myself included Was it the inevitability of your parents being your manager? Was that the case in your life as well? Yeah, yeah. And I had a pretty acrimonious relationship with my father, famously so.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, and as soon as I was able to kind of push him out, like, yeah, just my quality of life on the day-to-day level definitely went up. Right, gotcha. Yeah, I had a very complicated relationship with that as well. Certainly, as you get older, in retrospect, it becomes even more complicated as you become a parent and you start to think about the decisions, that they make about being an employee in your life

and how that adjusts the dynamic of how you look at your parents as, you know, what should be sort of your North Star, the person that you follow, when instead they now create a dynamic where you're the boss at an age when you're kind of needing parental girls. Yeah, and that's where their bread is buttered, you know, yeah. Yeah, it's really complicated. But, you know, I think you look to be on the other side of that very healthily.

I hope I am too. You pointed out before this idea, McCauley, I don't know if you had this, but this has always stuck with me, J.B., and I think about it from time to time. Truly, I do. That you, I remember you saying, you had to keep your grades up

in order to keep working, right? That they're by law. Every six months, yeah. So there was a pressure to keep your grades up so that you could work so that you could pay the bills because you were the bedwinner, right? Yeah, every six months it was a grading period,

or you had to maintain a C average, or you lose your work permit. And so whatever job you're on, you would be fired immediately. And so all the crew members go out of work, all the network gets upset. Fuck me. You know, like you're...

And you're a kid. Yeah. So midterms and finals, when you're doing a test that affects your grade by like 60 or 70%, it's just like earth-shattering pressure. Right. Did you have that,

did you experience that, McCorry? Not really. I was a fairly good student. And I had a pretty, a pretty great onset tutor and she, yeah,

she was very sympathetic to me and just when it came to like she could tell when I was tired or burn out or something like that

if you're having trouble answering any questions you just whisper it to you. Yeah, no, I wasn't like that, it wasn't like that, you know.

But yeah, she definitely, she definitely like would lay off me. Like she'd see me just keep me a wink if you don't know this one.

No, she'd like read me like the outsiders or something like that. Really? I'm going to read it to you could have to think.

Yeah. like that. Like, you know, yeah. Yeah, it was pretty great. You just rest your head against my shoulder. Where is this? Say, golden pony boy. Get over here.

Wow. That's hysterical. Well, I mean, by the way, so then what we're also not addressing is the fact, so you decide at 14, you're like, look, I need a break, I kind of want to shift gears here. I don't know if I want to do this anymore.

Huge shift. Compounded by the fact that you're about as famous a person there is on the planet at this point. Still, to this day. Until this day, of course. But I'm saying at 14. Yeah, it was a difficult, tricky waters

to maneuver through and stuff like that because you don't necessarily have the actual or emotional vocabulary to really kind of maneuver through those waters. And I always kind of thought of myself as a peerless person. Like I couldn't turn left and right. Like, you know, like and go, oh, you're like me.

Like, you know, it was a very unique experience. Yeah. And so, yeah, you know, so, yeah, it was, you know, I kind of had to, like, you know, just figure it out on my own for a big chunk of it. Yeah, I was going to say, like, how have you adjusted, if at all, how you are in public going to anywhere? Like, do you feel like you have to kind of compromise yourself and go, God, here we go? I definitely have to gird myself, you know, for, you know, outings and so forth. Right. You know, I just set certain ground rules for myself.

Like, you know, just, yeah, like, don't approach me when I'm at the dinner table. I don't like that, you know. Don't approach me when I'm with my kids. Definitely don't follow me to the bathroom, you know, like, things like that. You know, yeah. And I just realized that I'm in charge of the social contract. I'm in charge of the interaction. Sean, what are you scratching off on what list?

What are you doing? What are you talking about? Oh. No bathroom. Sean drops a lot of notes that say, please follow me to the bathroom. So then there you are, and now you take a decade off or whatever it was, a huge chunk of time, what's the moment where you go, I want to go back or you know, you kind of get to like the end of high school and you kind of just like, oh, what am I going to do with my life? You know, again, I could kind of do whatever I wanted. And, you know, there was that kind of thought where, like I said, this was something that found me. I didn't find it. And let me see, let me try this on. for size a little bit so I was about 20 or so

2021 I went to London did it did a play there for a year brought it back to the States that was fun it was a successful and then you know jumped in did party monster then I did save what play was it it was called Madame Melville was it at the barbecan the vaudeville theater of the Strand

sorry Jason had a question nothing was there was there ever a thought was there thought to go to college at all to study different career? Not necessarily, no. Like I said, I mean, unless I had, like, a focus on something, I didn't really see the point of it, like, just go get a degree in general.

Like, you know, if I wanted to be like, you know, wanted to study, like, English literature or something like that. Yeah, that would make sense. You know what I mean? But I didn't have that necessarily, that kind of bone in my body. So, yeah, I kind of just, although I did kind of, I semi-regrette because I remember visiting friends at college,

I go, oh, it looks like fun. Right, right, right. But, again, it would have been, it would have been purely social, really. It's like, yeah, I'm paying all that money to be social with people. Was social life enough outside of college to pacify that curiosity? Yeah, no, definitely. You know, yeah. I've had good groups of friends and so forth.

You know, yeah. Oh, I thought you were, I thought, Jason, you were saying, did you party? Well, basically. I mean, I'm looking at my daughter at college right now and just like, it just looks like so much damn fun. I mean, I definitely had fun without college, but my God, the whole sort of, and then, because it's like this great counterbalance. So, like, once you kind of sober up and you get past your hangar and everything, you do want to kind of balance it with something.

I didn't have that opportunity. With college, you can go listen to some incredible professor, give a lecture on something, and you can kind of bathe yourself with something that's highbrow, you know, I don't know. It would have been a good, good thing for me. You're so wistful, you know. I know. All I had was Charlie Rose in New York Times

To sort ofade myself Macaulay, did you ever guest star in a sitcom or anything? Yeah, it's funny. There was one long time ago, geez, I can't remember the name of it. Ah, you were Will and Grace. Yeah, I did an episode of Will and Grace. Yeah, that was great.

You were fantastic. Oh, thanks, yeah. No, I remember you were talking about how you're talking about Nancy Clemsky. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, you were like, I know Nancy and Anna. Wait, oh, that's right, because of... And you were like, you did an impersonation of her.

I was like, that was spot on. I haven't seen her in like 15 years. But I was like, yeah, you pinged me. That's right. Of Anna's mom, Nancy. Wait, because you were in my girl. Yes, we were at my girl together. Yeah, and Anne and I grew up in Chicago.

Yeah, I don't know what. It's all. Everybody's connected as well. Yeah, it's a small town, really. You were great. You were great on the show. It was fun. Yeah, I mostly worked with Megan and stuff, but that was fun.

Yeah. You know, yeah. To be fair, also, I didn't know what I was walking into. I'd never seen an episode in my whole life. That's fine, me neither. Yeah, yeah, exactly. These guys have any of them. So, so you take the break, you come back, you do theater, you come back to New York,

and then you do Party Monster. And I remember that was kind of like your big return. It was like a big Sundance hit, right? It was like a... Yeah, it was kind of what I wanted. You know, I was like, oh, I saw the... Oh, Sundance looks cool. I wanted to do some of the Sundancey and stuff, you know.

It was based on a true story. The book was really good. It was just like, yeah, like a... You know, it was something. kind of left of center kind of material and kind of, I didn't want to just jump into studio fair really. And did you feel, did you feel

satisfied once you did that? Not satisfied in terms of like I'm good forever, but did you feel like, okay, I'm doing the right thing here, I'm back, I'm kind of driving my own train here a little bit now. Yeah, definitely. It was nice to try those boots on for size. And yeah, and kind of

like again, having some, you know, autonomy, like I said, an agency where I was kind of like, oh, this is what I want. to do. And yeah, no, it was a ton of fun. You know, yeah, it was very different. Because I was doing all these, like, really expensive studio kind of gigs. And next thing you know, we're kind of guerrilla filming in Times Square,

waiting for the police patrol to go by so that we could film and then, you know, got to wait again. And, like, you know, Seth Green is dressed like a pork chop. I'm wearing just nothing but, like, you know, just like a feather boa as an entire outfit. Yeah, it's great. Great movie. And it was.

It was a great movie. What's the funny? What are you laughing at, Jason? I'm going to call it. I was wearing a feather ball. It's complete outfit. Sean's like, yeah, yeah. I love that movie.

I do. I love that movie. Sean just woke up. Sean's very raw. He just woke up. Wait. So, wait, so Brenda, right? Is her name Brenda?

Yeah, yeah, Brenda. Yeah, my lady. Yeah, as she, forgive me. That's your wife? Yeah, we're actually, we're unwed interracial couples. So, yeah, we check all the boxes when it comes to. Well, but wait, so then you haven't slept together. Yeah, oh yeah, well, I mean,

Only twice, really, you know Wait a second, there goes heaven Oh, look at those kids Oh, my God Two boys, am I guessing right? I'm the maker of men Oh, wait, let me see it again, let me see it again No, you have to tap it again

Dark Yeah, oops, face ID Look at those things Oh, that's great I can't wear a double-bressed jacket Yeah, no, they're two boxy on me You ever try rocking a Mohawk too? Yeah, they're two boxy on me

All right, so where, when did you meet your baby mama? Yeah, yeah. We did a film together in Thailand. I went all the way to Thailand. He met a Thai girl from Sacramento. Nice. Wow. Yeah.

Yeah, and we kind of met there. We didn't have any scenes together, but we had a lot of free time. Let's put it that way. Yeah, and I think, especially she was looking at, oh, this is going to be a fling. And I think we both were, like, fleeing, you know, yeah. And she's like, I never had a fling before. And, yeah, we got that. back to the States and we kept it going.

And, you know, yeah. How long has that been? About eight and a half years now. Oh, wow. Very cool. Yeah. Yeah, we'll get married someday, you know. I mean, it's funny because she wanted me to propose.

She wanted to get married. And so finally I put a ring on it. And now she's in no hurry to get married. I'm like, wait a second. Is she engaged perpetually engaged? Yeah, it's been, she's about four years, almost on the doubt. We got engaged on Christmas of 2021. All right. Now, how do you like being a dad? I mean, it's considering the incredibly colorful childhood you had, are you enjoying having that role now?

Yeah, yeah. No, I absolutely love it. You know, yeah. It's a little, it's, it was strange because it's, I didn't really have a lot of, I'm kind of reinventing the wheel. Let's put it that way. I didn't really have any good role models. So, you know, my father was a goddamn piece of work. Right. And it was completely untraditional, non-traditional. So it was scary. It was absolutely scary. Yeah. And, yeah, like I said, like my, you know, like what, like, what a proper family was.

Right. Really, it was more refl, you know, it was like a, you know, growing pains or family ties or something like that. You know, like, yeah. Because I definitely did not have a conventional family. And how many of your siblings, sorry. third of seven kids. My mother did not have a family. She had a litter, a litter of Culkin's. Wow.

Wow. Seven. So are you, do you guys run a very then traditional house? Like, is there Sunday dinners and, yeah? Yeah, I mean, we definitely wear matching pajamas. That's cool. And, yeah, no, it's a, they have a more structured life than I did. Mine was kind of more freewheeling, kind of, you know, like a

It makes you want to be a better dad, right? Indeed, indeed. You know, again, that's that's the whole thing. I don't want the sins of my father being passed on to my kids. Right, right, right. So, yeah, I'm, you know, so yeah. And are you, so are you close to your family, your family of origin, like your, your siblings and?

A little bit, I mean, yeah, I mean, I keep in touch, but they're, they're all East Coast. None of them have ever lived outside of New York City. I've lived all over the place and stuff, so I'm 3,000 miles away, so it's, I don't seem as often touch base, things like that, you know, Merry Christmas, every Thanksgiving. How many of them are performers, but I know that your, your brother, Cairn's an actor, of course. Yeah, no, I'm very proud of him. Between me and him, we have exactly one Oscar, yeah.

Ah, that's good. That's really good. And my brother, Rory, he works a lot, too. He actually works for me and Kieran combined. He's just doing a bunch of indies and stuff. He's always moving. Is it nice to be able to reach out to a sibling and discuss the oddities of this business?

I know I enjoy that sometimes with my sister. No, we don't really, honestly, we don't really talk shop. You know, like, yeah, we were kind of a, I mean, occasionally you kind of touch base on it kind of thing, but it's like, you know, like, you know, just because, like, you know, just because you're both mailmen doesn't mean you want to talk about the male, you know, that kind of thing. Is your wife still acting? Oh, yeah, no, she's, she, she's always swimming. She's always moving forward. She's on that show Running Point. She just finished season two last week.

Oh, wow. And she's, she's got, she's working on two films in January and March and stuff. Like, yeah, she books. She likes it. She likes the pursuit. I don't really like the pursuit. I like the work itself. She likes the whole package.

She loves auditioning. I freaking hate it. Like things like that. Oh, me too. Yeah, yeah. So she's a bit of a masochist then, huh? Yes, yes, indeed. You know, but listen, God bless her because she knew what she wanted out of life.

And she knew what to pursue and she pursues it to her fullest, which is very admirable. But, yeah, I, you know, for me, I'm kind of just, I'm kind of more of a, like, she's a shark. She has to keep swimming or she drowns. I'm more of a kind of a feeder fish. I kind of let things sieve for me kind of thing. Well, but Macaulay, you sound so, I don't mean to press you on this. I'm just purely curious because we come from some similar backgrounds.

But I'm so in awe of your contentment. Like it seems like you, you know, I'll take it if it comes. If it doesn't, it doesn't. I'm not particularly obsessed or drawn to any one. particular thing there's no there's in other words are you do you have anything like i've got to get this done before i die uh not necessarily i mean at least when it comes to like my work and things like that uh it's like you know gosh i mean you know i practically just sometimes i used to do like general meetings like for a living kind of thing you know they want they want a silver bullet idea

you know what i mean they want to go i want to play a doctor but a kooky one you know i want to play a quarterback you know sure i don't really have that i let things kind of come to me it's the um The old, you know, it was the case before the Supreme Court. They were like a, they tried to define what pornography was. And pornography, the definition of it, according to the Supreme Court, is I know it when I see it. It's literally what he said, you know, yeah. So I'll know it when I see it. I treat it like pornography, pretty much is what I'm trying to say.

Sure, right. But acting is the thing that you're interested in pursuing at this moment. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, yeah. Yeah, I'm on the new show, Fall, out or you know that i'm doing season two of that and so we're doing that earlier in the year

and stuff but like yeah like here's the thing is that you can't get caught in the rat race you know you could win an oscar right right and you're backstage and you're doing the press conference and you're holding your trophy you're the top of your game and you know what they ask you what are you doing next right as if it's not good enough you know and i don't buy into that think about all the people that have won oscar has even been nominated and there's just nothing that comes afterwards it's like that is not that's not the thing it's so and that's that's why i'm asking it's like you couldn't you couldn't ever be more famous than you are now and so it's clearly not fame or money that you're like is it are you interested in literally just playing different people

like the whole literal thing that an actor does is that interesting to you like are you fascinated by different kinds of people yeah yeah no i i like i like the adventure of calling these different shoes and things like that and um it's something that's kind of like just it comes pretty naturally to me and so forth i mean i i've had a director he was like how could it goes are you doing that on purpose? I'm like, what? He goes, you walk different when I call action.

I'm an actor, bro. I just do it. Like, you know what I mean? I don't practice it in the mirror and stuff like that. I kind of like just kind of wrapping myself up in some of these things and kind of just not thinking,

make it reflexive. I looked on your Instagram. I saw that you were in Vegas. Do you like Las Vegas? I love the Vegas. I know, I had to convince Brenda. She was like, oh, I don't like gambling and stuff. I go, no, no, the food's great.

And, you know, the shows are cool and stuff. And now I got her at the tables, though. Now she's a blackjack player. It's the best. Is that your game? Yeah, play Blackjack. You know, sometimes I'll throw a little on a roulette and so forth, you know, yeah. But I don't play craps.

God doesn't play dice, you know, yeah. So neither do I. Sean, if you, I've been to Vegas with Sean before. If you didn't pull him away from the tip, like if Sean happened to be there for a week, he'd lose it all. It's unbelievable his desire to gamble. It's all true. No, Blackjack, it's unreal. I saw him once splitting, splitting aces, blah, blah, blah.

And at one point he had, I don't even want to say it was obscene, he'd just come in, yeah, double down, double down, double down, double up, I'm like, dude, what are you doing? Yeah, yeah, well, when you had a few, you just kind of make bad decisions. Yeah, I don't drink when I gamble, that's the trick. I don't think you can win unless you're drunk. That was my problem, yeah. But I do the roulette a lot, and I almost always win

because I just almost bet on every number. You know what I mean? They look for folks like you. You know, what's happened? We'll be right back. And back to the show. What about the sphere? Have you been in the sphere yet?

Yeah, we saw Backstreet Boys there. My lady was living her best life. She actually, like, she really dressed the part. She looked like a mom that was a big fan of Backstreet Boys. I mean, she was wearing all white with a bandana. She bedazzled her own shirt for it and stuff. Honestly, it was freaking amazing. Like, you know, I was, you know, I was never a Backstreet Boy.

guys and stuff like that but man it was it was actually really great we got to meet the boys and they were that's nice sweet you know i think she wants to go back before the end of the year i think they're doing a christmas like residency too guns to your head mac you got to pick one one of the boys is your favorite oh my god who uh oh who's the fox where there's a gun to his head he's a guy chose one now yeah uh kevin kevin kevin oh yeah but he's a fox Kevin is a fox, yeah. Yes, he is. He was the fox.

Kevin, speaking of Kevin, I'm going to drag it back to Kevin. Yeah, do you know the story that there is a footballer? This is a long tie-in. A footballer who plays professional soccer in Belgium. I believe he plays for Union. There's a professional footballer called Alexis McAllister. He's a midfielder for Liverpool. I love him.

He won the World Cup with Argentina. He's incredible. His family is of Irish descent, but they grew up, his great-grandparents moved to Argentina. His brother, Kevin, plays professional as well in Belgium, and he found out when he was 18 that he was named after your character from... No way. Is that true?

His name's Karen McAllister. And his name's Kevin McAllister, and his brother plays for Liverpool. I should get his jersey, and I should sign it and send it back to him. Yeah. I got to be so cool. Absolutely. I got to look this up. Yeah, yeah. I got to get that. And I remember watching, because they played Champions League last year randomly Liverpool, and the brothers played each other,

and then the commentator goes, did you know that he found out when he was hating? Was there a time, McCauley, because I've asked this before, and it's happened to me, probably all of us, when you're so identified with somebody like I was with Will and Grace and you with Kevin McAllister,

where you fought the attention it brought you for so many years, and then something clicked, you're like, you know what, I need to embrace this thing, and like, it kind of made me who I am. Was there a moment like that? Do you remember?

Yeah, I mean, it was definitely burdensome, for sure. and yeah you notice it's the the trick is just relax set up your own ground rules things like that you know realizing that I'm in charge of the social interaction you know like usually when people meet a celebrity they go I'm going to be cool and then they meet it and they just they turn into something else you know right

and so it's like it's kind of you know it's like oh I'm I'm in charge I can guide this interaction and also I know I know all kinds of shortcuts and stuff like that like you know just if you want to end it you just go nice to meet you or you know yeah or have a great day or something like that, you know. And a lot of times they walk away before they even realize

the interaction's over with and like, oh, man, I didn't get that photo. Like, yeah, you sure didn't. Bye. But when you were, when you were, how old were you, did the first home alone? Oh, was nine when I did that. Nine.

So you're nine, you do that movie and you're still, I guess, living at home in New York, right? It's a 35-year anniversary of it, actually. Oh, wow. The Academy Museum later this month, yeah. Oh, wow, that's cool. That's insane.

Yeah. So you're nine years old, you're super famous, and you're still living at home with your parents and your siblings and everything, I imagine, in New York. But you're the most famous person on the planet walking down the same street. It must have been, that must have been

an adjustment. Yeah, it was a lot. I was in like in an old Irish neighborhood and stuff like that. You know, I'm the, you know, I'm an actor. I'm a ballet dancer. I'm all these things. So they're like, hey, what the fuck is this? You know, like that kind of thing. It was a little bit of that. But there was also, yeah. But

yeah, no, it was strange. There was some whiplash. I was shooting my girl in Orlando when the first home alone came out out and, you know, like, yeah, I was kind of an actor, yada, yada, yada, but it wasn't a big deal and then that movie came out and then I just remember the old neighborhood

kids, like just of that little community I was living were now peeking through my window. I was like, wait, I know you, you're Jimmy Jim Jim over there, you know, yeah, and it's like, no, all of a sudden it's like, oh, I'm different, I'm not one of them anymore. It was like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, there was kind of an adjustment period there where, you know,

and I kind of maneuver those waters as best I could really, you know. I really wasn't given a lot of tools. So it was kind of just, yeah, I kind of just had to embrace it. But for me, everything made sense. You know, you are on a hero's journey. You know what I mean? Oh, you do little black box theater.

You do smaller movies. You do bigger movies. And then you're a huge fat superstar. That makes sense. That's the hero's journey. And it's not until you have perspective. I go, oh, this is quite abnormal, actually. Like, you know, there's a lot of people who are hacking away at it and they don't get there.

You know, yeah. Talk a little bit more about that sort of the dichotomy of you are embraced and a part of such a huge global community. You're one of all, the whole world wants to talk to you. But then you have like that moment with your immediate group, your friends, you know, down the block. And there's kind of this thing that eats at you that you're really not one of them. Like they talk to you and about you a little bit differently.

Like when you go back to your regular school or whatever, I remember feeling so lonely and disconnected with that such that, you know, when I had the time and the money to do it, I, like, I overcompensated for trying to get back into that community and just partied like crazy and tried to, like, you know, be one of the guys. Did you go through any of that yourself? Oh, yeah, yeah, I definitely did plenty of partying and so forth, you know, I mean. But in pursuit of that, to try to get back and just be one of the guys?

Yeah, no, that was, I had a yearning, like I said, I wanted to go to school. You know, it was mostly for social reasons. I wanted to hang out with people my own age. That was a big thing for me. And so I definitely wanted that. But, you know, but it's, you know, it's interesting. It's like, you know, how everyone you're told when you're younger, everyone's a delicate snowflake, you know, everyone's different and stuff like that.

I truly felt different, you know, I mean, like, yeah. And rather than looking at it as a burden, it was kind of like, no, I'm a unicorn, you know. Like, yeah, I'm some kind of mythical creature. I am different. And I kind of enjoyed that as well. But at the same time, again, you are kind of alone on an island. You know, you are, you know, again, a peerless person, you know, someone who's an accountant can turn left and right and

there's other accountants in the office kind of thing. Like, I don't get to have that. But also, like, not only that, and then also there is the, you know, the sort of the commerce of it. Did you appreciate your 9, 10, you're making the deal for the next one? I remember, like, that stuff's like published in the paper about how big it's going to be and all that kind of stuff. Did you, how do you sort of absorb that kind of information when you're 9, 10, 11 years old? I knew I was making some bank. I knew that, but I didn't, you know, you know, you're 9, 10, you're not, I'm not reading, I'm not reading Entertainment Weekly, you know, like, yeah, it's like, you know, I'm watching the new X-Men cartoon, you know, that's what I'm doing, you know, yeah, right, right, right, yeah, trying to find some, you know, you know, normality, you know, in my life and stuff like that.

So I didn't really keep track of it. I was kind of also, I didn't, like, you know, I wasn't told how much I was being paid either. Right, of course. I called it the tiny slip of paper kind of meeting. I turned 18 and I go to. my business manager's office and, you know, boom, he has all my financials and he just slides it across the table and it's like, okay, this is what you got. And I had a sense of how much it was and it was about, you know, it was about right. Yeah. And so, yeah, and also, I'm just very fortunate

because a lot of people, you know, a lot of kids, they, you know, they work, not just in this business, but all around the world, you know, there's, you know, people working in, you know, diamond mines in Africa, you know, there's, you know, in the slums of Mumbai, they've got nothing to show for it. So I'm, I'm, I wake up very blessed every day knowing that, like, yeah, I came not the other end of the spin cycle. So, so, like, Jason referred to before about, you just seemed so chill and together and, like, you figured it out for yourself, which is great.

You're in pajamas for Christ's sake. I know, right? Exactly, yeah. I'm on the clock, you know, yeah. So what do you worry about? What's the thing that you worry about? No, you know, I mean, standard stuff. You want to make sure, you know, I raised my boys, right? You know, make sure the lady is, like, you know, happy

that, you know, that, you know, our cups are full. You know, it's that kind of thing. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, no, it's standard kind of stuff. Because, again, if I never work again, I'm totally fine when it comes to, like, acting or anything like that. Like, you said, every job's my last job. I'm in a constant state of retirement until I'm not, you know, and I retire again. So, yeah, I don't look, my trick is I don't look for satisfaction over there.

Yeah, I turn inward when it comes to stuff, you know, both me and my family, you know. What do you do to give, to alleviate the stress? Do you have a, do you have a hobby that brings you great pleasure? that people would be surprised about? Will, you'll like this. I'm a big Lego guy. Really? Yes, I build a lot of Legos.

I probably built about 30 sets in the last 40 days. Wow! Yeah, yeah. You know, Lego has, I will say, does have real sort of... Soothing, calming. Yeah, it's like a puzzle.

There's a sort of restorative quality to it, to the soul. You sort things out, you build it piece by piece, you know, you get that release of endorphins when you're done and that sense of accomplishment. I love that. It's therapeutic. It can be really therapeutic and aware. Are you at the level now that, and I am not. In fact, I haven't thought about this until just this moment.

Or do you go without the books? Oh, no, no. I still do the books, but I do some of the 10,000 piece sets and stuff like that, too. I clocked myself. I do just under 500 pieces an hour I can do, you know, yeah, like depending on what kind of setting. Lego thing? Yeah, yeah. I'm pretty,

I'm sick of nature at this point. Yeah, like, do you, yeah, do you have like, a, you're like a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, I just, you know, I, I, I, I can anticipate. If you do it long enough, you can anticipate what they're going to do next. Oh, so, what I sort things and so forth. I want you to try one without the books, one of these things, to one of those, freestyle, you'll see what it looks like, you know?

Because of that, do you have, like, OCD, because you like to make things, like, complete like that? No, not necessarily. Like, you know, it keeps my mind and my hands busy, you know, and, uh, and, yeah, and also it's, it's decorative and so forth. I love, like, I'll build, like, an Avengers set and then my three and four-year-old just tear it absolutely apart, but it's like that's, but also that's what it's, honestly, I kind of like that's, you know, it's those, um, what is it's like Chinese, like, uh, like vases or whatever, they build them and they smash them and then put them back together, and that's kind of, you know, that's the beauty of it. Do you get annoyed when your boys try to help? no not at all no if anything like they're on like the duplo stuff so it's all the oversized things but i'm really looking forward to building like you know some some proper sets with them and they have helped me i'm like oh give me that red one please and like you know so they're they're gonna super be into it they they love it i i always get them little lego men and things like that those mystery boxes and all that stuff they're super i'm gonna i'm gonna get i'm gonna get you i'm gonna get you in touch with them i think that you need to do like a signature build, like design a build for the world, the McCauley-Colkins set.

Oh, yeah, yeah, open up that gateway for me, yeah, for sure. You know, we were just on Fridays and Saturdays on non-school nights. We do slumber parties in Mama-Papa's bed, and let clockwork. They like the Lego movie, but also they're super into Lego Batman. They're super into it. My oldest dressed as Batman this Halloween because he's a big fan of Lego Batman. Oh, that's great. Yeah, and then, yeah, so he was Batman, she was Robin, and I asked him, oh, what do you want me to be?

He goes, I want you to be a toilet. Wow. Oh, that's right, I saw that. I saw you, you went as a toilet. I was a toilet, yes. That's hilarious. Yeah, but, you know, if your son asks you to be a toilet, you got to be the best thing toilet you can be, you know, yeah. That's hysterical.

See, just for context. Very nice. Ah, that's hilarious. Yeah. How did you do that? Did you make that? Yeah, I just pieced it together with Amazon stuff and everything. that, you know, it's the white crocs really tied the room together,

like Lobowski's rug. I think that if you go as a toilet, you hope that everybody around you doesn't give a shit. Oh, yeah. Well, aren't. I would jump out from behind trees going, poo. I walk by, like,

if somebody dresses a banana, go, see you later, you know. You know, like, it's like, oh, oh, corn, oh, yeah, I love corn, you know, yeah. And I had a little bag in my bowl and stuff like that, and they, like, oh, I'd be. trick-or-treating. They're like, do you want some candy? Go, oh, no, I just eat poo. And then I would have

a stickers bar ready. Like, oh, I love poo. Like, yeah, kids loved it. I had this one kid who's following me around the entire time all around the neighborhood. You know, yeah. He just loved the fact. He's like, oh, look, it's a walking, talking toilet. Meanwhile, Sean is hiding in his house with the lights off and a sign on the front door

saying, keep moving. Yeah. That's true. It's so true. No, we know. We know. You've got a house full of candy even when it's not Halloween. And you don't want to share it with the day. Like smog or something. Yeah, totally, yeah. Wow, there you go.

Wait, what's the perfect day with you and your family? I know you just said that slumber thing, which is cool. Yeah, we do slumber party. I really love that. You know, I like taking them to, I'm teaching my boys how to be romantic. So I take them to Trader Joe's and pick out flowers so they can give it to Grandma and Mama and stuff like that. Like, I love doing that kind of stuff.

I like teaching them things. Like, you know, yeah, it's good. But, man, they're at that age. They're running me ragged, like just, you know, do it's like 40 minutes straight of cardio just like, yeah, playing, playing. He's like, you be the bad guy, I'll be the police, and you be the fireman.

He's like, okay, okay. And he's like, oh, man, I'm just like, I'm literally setting fires, you know, so the fireman can put it out, you know, yeah, like that kind of thing. Oh, run a me ragged, but they're that really sweet spot with their, like they are little people now. They have opinions and the way they converse, just being a fly on the wall, it's, it's so cute, you know, yeah.

That's so good. I think grandma taught the boys that, my youngest, who's three, taught them our real names. Oh, it's. So it's like, what's your papa's name? He's like, McCauvey Cokin. And it's like, what's your mother? Bender's strong.

I know, that's always kind of fascinating when you learn your parents' names. I thought it was mom and dad, yeah. Well, my oldest, see, my kids, they look at like Sweet Life of Zach and Cody. That was the show that my lady was on when she was a kid. They watched that, and they'll go, oh, that's Mama on TV. I showed them Hobolone, my oldest, especially. He thinks he's Kevin McAllister.

He doesn't put it together. He doesn't put it together. It's me. So he sits there and I'm like, oh, do you remember going down the stairs on the sleazy? He's like, yep, yep, yep, yeah, you remember, you know, sitting up trashed for the bad guy? He's like, yeah, sure, do? I'm like, you liar. You lying liar who lies. That was me.

Do you like your shoes? That's what paid for your shoes. He's no resemblance between you and the kid in that movie. I love that. He's going to blow his mind in a minute. And one day, I'm waiting for the big reveal where all of a sudden he's just going to go, hey, wait a second. I'm not going to tell him.

I'm sure some kids going to spoil the reveal at school during recess or something like that. But he's going to turn and go, wait, you've been the whole time? Like, yeah, whole time. But, you know, of all the kids on this planet Earth, they're the closest ones who actually say, oh, yeah, I'm like that kid from that movie, you know, yeah. And it's also watching that movie is taking on an entirely different experience now. Like, you know, before it was kind of just, oh, it was a movie that I did. Now it's something I show my kids.

And it's a, you know, it's a different animal now. That's really cool. appreciate it differently. It's such a classic holiday movie. Do you, do they like watching it during the holidays? They absolutely love it, yeah. And they still don't know it's you? They still don't know it's me.

That's crazy. Well, I mean, you know, it has been 35 years. Yeah, no, I know, but I'm just like, that's so wild. Yeah, no, it's going to dawn on them. It's going to dawn on them, and it's going to be like, yeah. Like a lot of other parents I showed my kids, they've all seen it a zillion times and love it. Well, they have good taste, yes. Yeah, they've been, it's been a staple.

Actually, you know, it's funny, I made a video on, uh, I took a photograph of my son from a few weeks ago, and I put it on an AI app, and I gave the prompt to have somebody hand him a golf club, and then he does a golf, does a swing. So he did it. These apps are incredible. So he does this AI-generated video.

And I show it to him, and he's like, yeah, I remember that. And I go, you never did that. You're liar. Yeah, and I'm like, he's five. And he's like, no, I did that. I'm like, no, you did it. That's it. But I just saw it.

Clearly, it's me. Clearly, it's me. Anyway, well, McCauley, Kalken, you, first of all, Zootopia 2, you and Jason. Jason's so in love with your character. Oh, my God. Incredible work. Oh, yeah. You too, man.

You know, yeah. Can't wait to meet you on the carpet. I know. And then the next season of Fallout as well, you can be seen there as well. And McCauley, thank you for joining us, man. You're just an absolute legend. Love us. Yeah, it was fun.

Such a joy. Such a joy. Great having you, pal. Yeah, the great McCauley Calkin, thank you so much, dude. Thanks for being in here. Bye, buddy. See you later. Cheers.

Bye, tutels. Fantastic. I love learning about the, all that stuff. Like, you want to ask him about the home alone, but you're like, can I, shouldn't I? But then you're like, I want to know. So it's pretty, that's so wild. His kids don't know it's him. I know.

How nuts is that? That's so cool. Wait a minute. Well, like, I want to, he needs to film that moment when they're like, wait a minute that's you um but really cool and like i like how you said jay about how he's um kind of just down to earth figured it out kind of parented himself through the whole thing and came out great it feels very comfortable with himself from where he's at yeah exactly and he's got that uh he's got that that that magic uh sort of indifference right about about about about work and success and all that stuff

that'll probably or is it sexy it might be sexy it could be little magic probably just keep him working the rest of his life because he's just got that you know healthy you know the thing about the sexy indifference is it's kind of naughty it is kind of dirty hey did you know what jessie eisenberg can he was can you know a stranger let's get taylor let's get taylor and the gals in here can we get by the way they would love to i mean we'd love to say are they still sleeping let me see oh yeah we just go in the intercom how long is it take to get from one end to your house to the other a while right you have golf carts series of golf carts oh son's doing so well I know he's doing so well.

He's really doing it. Hey, so sorry about being late again. Yeah, well, listen, Sean, I'm glad you mentioned that. Do you have a second here? Because Will and I'd love to talk to you about it. Things have been a little sloppy, like, I think, coming out of your, you know, and I'm glad that the audience is not listening to this because, and Will, do you want to start? Yeah, I just said, we, we, we, let me read the thing I wrote.

Sean, we love you, and we feel like we are losing you. It's okay. Oh, wait, they're all coming in. They're all coming in. Oh, my God. Come on. Here we go. One by one.

Where they come. One by one. Amesley. Come on. Name them off. Let's go, Sean. Hi. Oh, my God.

Look at the, look at the, what are you doing, Sean? I know. This is what. Yeah, we talked about Jesse Eisenberg. Oh, my God. No. He's like really nice. who's

and wait he's giving his kidney no stranger I know we know we know and what about who doesn't use a phone Ed Sheeran doesn't use a phone and what do we think of that

he's so out of touch he's so mysterious well maybe he just needs a smartless mobile plan yeah maybe he needs a smartless mobile plan he said obviously yeah

Sean sign them up to smartless mobile immediately would you can you hear This is my niece, Elise. Elise, hi, Elise. Say hello. Hello. Hi.

Hi, oh my God, no, I can't. You know what? Ask them, ask them to say. Yeah, okay, ready? In unison. Okay, ready? Okay, we got to go now. So everybody, we're going to say, one, two, three.

Bye. Bye. Hey. Smart. Smartless is 100% organic and artisanly handcrafted by Michael Grant Terry, Rob Armjarf, and Bennett Barbico.