SmartLess - "Will Forte"

Episode Date: December 20, 2021

In the words of Will Forte, "It's almost too much for your eyes and ears to handle."See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, well good morning. Hi. Oh, did I wake you? No, no, no. I was just in the middle of not well, I can tell you what you weren't in the middle of combing your hair. Did my hair look messy? Well, look at the back. Oh, yeah, it's kind of sticking up. What's morning time and I haven't gone through my routine. So you just literally rolled out of bed and sat in front of the mic. Yeah, is that okay? Do you sleep next to the mic? I sleep in the booth. Yeah. All right. What's the name of the show we're doing today? Oh, we're doing Smartless now. Yeah, right now. We'll go to the smart list. Smart. Smart. Smart. Smart. Smart. Smart. Oh, I got to read this. Wait, well I got to read this text that Jason sent me the other day. Oh, okay, so I was just I'm back from Chicago,

So when I was in Chicago, I'm staying at this hotel and I put my slippers on that they provide inside the hotel room and I took a shot of my feet in the slippers and I said to Jason, hey, dumb shit, is this how you do it? Right? Cause he doesn't want us, you know, he has a fear of step walking around hotel rooms.

Not a fear, just a practicality. Just a practicality, he doesn't want to walk barefoot on hotel. In the same way I wear shoes on the subway, you know? Okay. It's a little different. There's a lot of traffic in a hotel. Quick side bar, quick side bar.

Last time we were on the subway. Yeah. I mean, you know. Okay. We got an answer. Thanks very much. Thanks for calling, calling. So I said, so I texted Michael, I took a picture of it

and in the background of the picture is my tennis shoe with the little orthotic lift in it. Cause I'm wearing that. Quick side bar. Last time you played tennis. Yeah. You can call them sneakers. Okay.

Okay. So in the photo, in the background is my shoe with the little orthotic lift in it, like an old man. So I go, did I get this? Listener, let's be clear. This is a pad that he straps on to the bottom of whatever shoe he's wearing so that he can match the height of his unnecessary walking boot that he's wearing

cause he's got an injured little piggy. That's right. That's right. One small toe that just hurts a little. So in the photo is the slippers. And I say, hey dumb shit, did I get this right? Like kind of making fun of him, but not really. So then he goes, you did get the slipper part right,

but this is still very, very wrong. And I go, that's my shoe. Are you jealous? And he goes, no, I know. I'm talking about the friggin orthopedic riser on it. And I said, I know that's because of my fucking boot on the other foot. The one I'm going to ram up your blown out asshole.

Right. And he wrote, I know I'm saying enough, chop the toe off or develop a terrible limp. It will not be worse than the cruise ship medical wear. Well, I was hot that night. The cruise ship medical wear. You're still wearing a walking boot unnecessarily. And this one.

You're sitting. And that. You're sitting. Come on, Sean. Sean, by the way, who said they went on a hike recently? Was Sean anywhere the boot? Who was it who you went on a hike with recently? But Sean, seriously, do we have an ETA,

any sort of prognosis as to when you can stop the nonsense? Does the doctor say you're just stuck with this the rest of your life? No, no, no, no, like three months. But I don't care. What do I care? What do I look like? I mean, that's like, I get that.

Again, one more time on the injury. What exactly? What is it? It's a little tiny tear on my second toe underneath it. All right. So you have the whole boot. Yeah. You ever seen pictures of guys hitting the beach at Normandy?

That's me. None of them had a boot. Yeah. So here's the deal. So our guest is somebody that we've all known for a long time and we all have adored for a long time. Andy Richter. It's not Andy Richter.

And we love him more than we love Andy. And if Andy's listening, he knows that that's okay. He's a guy who started, he didn't start, when he graduated from UCLA, he didn't immediately go into comedy. Chase Utley. He went into not Chase Utley. Fuck Jesus.

We're not doing the guessing game the whole time. He went into finance originally. Then he started going to Groundlings and he started performing and writing. Then he got a couple of great writing jobs. He started writing on that 70s show, Third Rock from the Sun. He then submitted and ended up writing on Letterman.

Spike Ferreston. He wrote on Letterman, Wally's brother, Spike, no. He wrote on Letterman. Then he left that, he went back to LA and then Lauren Michaels saw him performing, asked him to audition for SNL. He was already a writer on many comedies and he said yes and thank God he did

because he's brought us so many great characters over the years, not the least of which one, there was a recurring character that he then ended up making a movie out of it. He's now making a series out of it. It's our friend, Will Forte. Oh, Will Forte. Oh, Will.

Ike and Huber. Yes. Hello. Hello. Hi, Will. Look at this, more comedic royalty than smartness. I know, look at it. Look at Will Forte.

Will, one of my favorite things about Will is he used to, his outgoing voicemail message, used to be Will, and I think John Solomon's singing, Will Forte, beep, and then went into the beep, that was it. Is that right, Will? Who was it? It was my ex-girlfriend, Amy Keen.

She sounds a lot like John Solomon. Yes. Yes. So Forte, I meant to, when I say we've all known and loved you for a long time. Everybody I know who knows you feels the same way, has great affection for you. You're one of the warmest, kindest, sweetest guys

in this business and you offset people like Bateman, which is nice. So would you, no, there's no bud, that was the bird. That was, because it hasn't been unanimous from what I'm understanding from the people I talk to. Wow, yeah, but you keep going. You're talking to nicer people. Go ahead.

It's so, no, I know it. Will knows who they are. Wait, you've got to listen. You know who the exact people are who don't like you. Yeah, I got to, you know. Let's hear a couple of them. It's like Sean Spicer is your fan and Jim Shorting. Jim Shorting, honestly, can you,

and let's go around the room here and I'll start. I'm pretty proud to say there is not a person on the globe where I feel like I got, if I see them coming down the street, I'd cross to the other side of the street, like that I just don't get along with that person. We've got a lot of baggage. It's going to be a nightmare if they make eye contact with me. I don't have any enemies, I guess is what I'm saying.

Do you guys, will or not? You're saying that because you know I do. Well, I just, I'm just curious. I don't think, I don't think I do. I'm trying to think, I don't think that I have any. No, I don't think you do. I mean, I, no, I don't think you do. Sean, Sean, do you know?

No, I have no enemies, no. Forte. Forte? I certainly wouldn't cross the street because of anybody. You know, I'm trying to be better about just confronting issues when they come up, life's about getting better. And I think I, for a long time, I was, I don't know,

just, just scared about stuff, try to avoid it, but trying to be better. But you know, yeah, there's certainly people who, I don't know, bad breakups or something, which might be an awkward situation, but. Did you used to be the kind of person growing up where you did keep it all inside and you were like, oh, I can't, I gotta keep good face.

And I can't, and then it just bursts out like craziness. Oh yeah. No, I would, I would, oh sure, I'd keep stuff in. You know, I wanted, all situations have a nice little tidy bow on it. Kilauea, Kilauea used to be your, your handle in high school, I under said, right? Yes. Yeah, yeah, quite the volcano.

Well, actually, Forte, you bring up an interesting point. You do like to wrap things up. And this is something I've always admired. Will, you're often the last person to leave a party. Yeah. Right, is that a fair assessment? He loves to clean. Well, he, no, but he cleans up relationships.

Like he talks to everybody. He says goodbye to everybody properly. You never do what they call an Irish goodbye. You never slip out. You go, and especially if you've been talking to somebody, you make a point, which is really nice. I contact and you say, great talking to you. I'll see you later.

I have to go. Like you say all that stuff. Mostly people would be like, all right, I gotta go later. You know. Yeah, exactly. If I was the host of party that would put up a flare for me. I'd be like, okay, this guy clearly broke something really expensive in some of the rooms.

You know what, Jason? The first time I noticed it was one time we had, there were a bunch of people at your old house and you're in Amanda's house. And I remember Forte was there. Sean, I think you were there too. And you guys had like a party or something. And I think I was staying with you and Amanda.

And Forte was by far the last person to leave. You literally said goodbye to everybody. You know it's so funny too, because I think people think it's cool to like stand in a corner and not connect with people or leave early. Like you said, well, I think the cool thing is to stay and be the last person and be gracious and extend yourself and talk to everybody.

And right, I think that's the cool thing to do. Yeah, and that's sort of my point. Will you always make time for people? You always have conversations that are engaged. You're not flitting around. Like you engage with people. That's important to you, right? Yes, I mean, sometimes I feel like

I've gotten worse and worse at it. I think I would do exactly what you're saying all the time. Now having a baby makes it easier to not feel bad if I have to leave early. There are just times you just have to get out at a moment's notice. And yeah, it was almost an illness, how I said goodbye to people at parties.

It was like, you know, I'd start saying rounds. Oh, I didn't say bye to this person. They're gonna freaking hate my guts the next time I see them if they noticed that I've left without saying goodbye. And then... Now you're not getting invited to parties because of it. They're like, oh, no, no, no, no, no. You invite Forte.

He's gonna stay all night shaking your hand and helping you clean up and yeah. And then I do a second round. It's like, it was so long that I had to you say goodbye to people. It was almost like a new party. It was not. Haven't left yet.

When we were doing Brother Solomon, which we can get into in a second. Hold for a plus. When we were, yeah, hold for a plus. You're gonna be holding a long time. Yeah, I love that movie. I will say it every time. I know.

And you were the first and biggest fan of that movie, Jason. So we were shooting Brother Solomon. And I remember one day I was like, Forte was always like grabbing, making sure, or he'd leave me notes on my car in anagrams, like really long, right? So, and he's remember for a while, you were speaking in anagrams. Oh, yes.

Oh, wow. That was a long time ago. That was a long time. It was like 15 years ago. And Forte would go, I-W-T-T-Y-L-W-Y-G-B. And I'd be like, when you go, I'll talk to you later when you get back, right? Just for a while, for a couple of months,

hoping to catch on. For a while he was talking like that. So anyway, those are acronyms, right? Acronyms, not anagrams? No, that's not anagrams. Yeah, that's an acronym. Sorry, that's an acronym. That's an acronym.

That's right, sorry. Googling anagrams? I am sorry to call you out on that, but I- No, no, no, I'm glad you did. You're absolutely right. I said anagram, right? Yeah, it's an acronym. Sorry.

Wait, well, didn't you have like a kind of an openly about it, and we can cut any of this if you don't want, didn't you openly talk about having OCD? And was that one of the OCD kind of things that you would do, something like that? That didn't fit under OCD. That was just a weird thing that I just liked doing. That was just a party favor.

I mean, certainly it got stuck in, I just got stuck in that gear for a while. And it just like my brain would naturally, instead of hearing, hey, it was great saying you, I'd go, H-I-W-G-S-Y. And I got pretty fast at it. He got really fast. He was still kind of there.

That was great. That was really good. And I think it sort of tickled something in your comedy brain. And once it was active, like you couldn't turn it off. But anyway, my point is, so I remember thinking like, I fuck Forte, we're shooting downtown. I'm like, I'm not gonna let him say goodbye to me.

So I got in my car and I drove like 30 yards away. And we ran, I run out when they wrapped, I ran out, got in my car, 30 yards away. And Forte came back to the trailers and he's kind of looking around. And from 30 yards away, I honked, and he looks up the street and I went, and I just drove away like you got the win.

And I'm like, I'm not gonna let, what a dick. Hey, Will, I think I'd be remiss. I wanna, I know you're probably sick of talking about it, but I think my sister Tracy and a lot of viewers are kind of fascinated with origin stories of a phenomenal SNL alum like yourself. And what the process was about getting the show and how did it come about?

Because you are one of the best, most legendary people to come out of there. You had the best characters, you were always, always so funny in every sketch you did. And so what was that like? I know, again, boring question for you, but really exciting for me. So what is, so how did you get the,

like how did you get the role? What was the process like? What were you doing at the time? Yeah, what was your situation? Okay, so I was writing at that 70s show. Oh, that's right, which is crazy. My, I had been writing for like four or five years and had been on a ton of different shows

that kept just getting booted after 13 episodes. Well, sorry, sorry to stop you and even go further back. How did you start writing on comedy series? Like what was, you graduate UCLA, then how did you start writing on a comedy, on a big network comedy? Okay, so I, you mentioned as you were introducing me that my dad was in the financial industry.

So I just jumped into that. I thought, oh, I'm gonna try to, you know, sell stocks and bonds and I just, I hated it. It was, everyone was really nice, but it just was, Can't see why it seems really fun. Yeah, super fun. Super fun. It's really interesting.

The danger and the intrigue. The people are incredible. The danger. The people in the financial sector are so interesting. Go ahead. By the way, my dad is in the financial industry. Will. No, I know, I have a lot of friends

in the financial industry and they all know your dad and they say your dad's really interesting. Oh, so you weren't being sarcastic. No, of course not. I'm sorry, I read that as sarcasm and I was, folks, I've met are fascinating. Let's make the record clear. Yes.

Okay. Okay. Me too. No, I mean, no, let me just say Dan D's is the most interesting man in finance. Go ahead. The most. The most. Okay. Okay. So go ahead, Will.

So you're working finance. There's some kind of D's nuts joke in there, but I can't. Dan D's nuts. Oh God, that's right. Okay. I know. How about how interesting D's nuts are?

Something like that. I'll work on it. Keep going. Keep going. Or hey, Dan D's nuts, right? I mean, there's just, there's that. Let's workshop it right after this short podcast. So Will, so there you are.

So there you are. There I am. You're in finance business. Looking at numbers, ingesting numbers, crunching numbers. You're standing in front of a mirror naked and you're like, what do you want to do with your life, Will? I just couldn't. Why are you aroused?

Yeah. And then, and so I, I just, I don't know. I don't even know at what point in my life I realized I wanted to do comedy, but it must have been years before I was, you know, everyone loves movies, everyone loves TV shows, but I particularly loved SNL obviously and, and Letterman. So, so years down the road.

And you knew that you weren't unfunny based on school and whatnot, you're making kids laugh. You knew, you knew you had a sense of humor, but you want, how did you channel that into writing? How'd you get an opportunity to do it? Yeah, cause it's a big jump from finance into being a comedy writer. Well, I first started out like,

oh, the easiest way where I don't have to put myself out there is too much is to just start writing stuff. So I just started writing with this partner, Ann Blenden, was my, my writing partner back then and now Ann Hutchinson. We're doing a lot of applause tonight. And it was just such a great release too for this hellish job. And then I'd start, I don't know,

I started realizing, oh, I think I'd love to try to act out the stuff that I write. So somebody told me about the groundlings. My friend Scott Thomas, I think was the first person who told me about the groundlings. And I went and checked it out. And the very first Sunday show I went to, which is the Sunday show, the newer people,

it's like you work your way through the groundling system, make your way into the Sunday show, if you, if you climb the ladder and the Sunday show is like the minor leagues. And then from the Sunday show, you make it into the main company. And the Sunday show that I saw right before I took my first groundlings class was Will Ferrell,

Chris Kattan and a gas dire. I think, no, Parnell was not, no, Parnell. Yeah, Parnell. Yeah, that makes sense. It was, it was just this amazing group of people that I had no idea, oh, this is gonna be like the future of comedy. Yeah, that's insane.

You just started seeing this really funny show. And I said, oh, this is, this looks like fun. And they were probably hilarious. Oh, they were amazing. Yeah, of course. And there were a ton of other amazing people. That's the craziest thing about that. Like along the way, you go through the whole groundlings.

Some of the funniest people didn't make it. You know, it's, it's just, there's such a luck element to it as well. Yeah. And we will be right back. And now back to the show. So then there at the groundlings, there's some sort of a scout perhaps from 70 show

or some sort of. Yeah, how'd you get that packet in there? No, as I was doing groundlings, I was still trying to write stuff. I met Matt Rice is my agent. He was, he had taken me on that. Love, love. He's a friend of the show.

Matt Rice is a friend. Yeah. So I went to UCLA with him and dated one of his very good friends, Amanda Glazer. Right. And so met him. Do you cross the street when you see Amanda Glazer? No.

No, no, no, no. For sure. No, no, no. I think we're on good terms at least. Yeah, no, no, no. We haven't talked in a long time. She'll reach out to you after this, for sure. Yeah.

But I think fondly of her and hopefully- Check your voicemail. Yeah. So anyway, we had known each other through Amanda. And also we were in fraternities. I was a fraternity guy and he was a fraternity guy. We'll double back to that. And yeah, so we were right next to each other.

Really correct. Just go back to the groundlings. We have a mutual friend, Carrie Aisley, and she was telling me this one thing that used to do where there was a sketch where it was a spelling bee and you just spelled a word and didn't stop for like 10 minutes and just picked random letters and it went on and on and on.

Yes. Yeah. It was actually, they'd let me do it. It's a SNL finally. Oh, they did. I put it up like five times and finally, I think just to shut me up and not have me put it up at the table again.

Did it make the cut? Did it make the show? It made the show. It turned out doing really well. Can I just say in the middle of this is a sideline. This is on this topic of finally, we'll put it up five times. During the writer strike in the end of 2007, early 2008,

they did a show, a live SNL at UCB, at the old theater on 26th Street. And because there was no, they weren't airing any shows. So they did a live SNL, not for broadcast. Mike Sarah was the host. And basically they just picked sketches that had never made it to air that were like favorites of the cast and the writers and everybody,

but that had never been picked. And I don't know, there were probably eight or nine sketches. And if there were nine sketches, eight of them were forte sketches that were all cast and writer favorites. Cause they were so insane, but couldn't make it onto the air because the subject matter was too hot or whatever. Or they thought they were too esoteric.

Or by the way, just too funny. Just too funny. It was an unbelievably hilarious show, Will. That was, I mean, all time. That was a fun night. That was an incredible night. Anyway, sorry. I'd love to see that.

So Will Forte, with all of this comedic brilliance, and you don't have to agree with it, just plug your ears. Do you feel like, where does it all, what's your outlet for all that stuff? Cause you've got more in your brain than opportunity could possibly satisfy. So where is it going all? Where do you like to point it?

The smart list podcast. Yeah, good answer. Next question. Yeah, number two. Wait, wait, wait. So Will, I do want to get back to, sorry. We, and we've taken so many tangents here, but so you're doing this, you're doing the groundlings,

whatever you have a friend, you've got to pack it. You send it to what? You just send it to Carsey Warner, care of Radford studios. I had done these weird cartoons. So I did these weird cartoons, showed them to Matt Rice. That was what made him say,

oh, I think, I think I want to sign you. And back then he was like, You're talking about sketch cartoons, like New Yorker cartoons. Yeah, basically. Well, it was, it was called 101 things to definitely not do if you want to get a chick. And it's just a bunch of dumb.

I'd like to see that. Like do not kill their pets. Right. Do not, you know. It's a good, by the way, it's a great note. One to live by. It's just a bunch of really weird stuff. And it was, you know,

so anyway, this thing got me my first couple of jobs, this, this packet of sketches. And so right as I was, I had just made my way through the grounding system, got my first job at the Jenny McCarthy sketch show. That was on MTV. And then went to Letterman from that. Oh, I'm so sorry about.

No, I love her. This is what eight and a half month old kids do. Yeah. You're just, you know what you are? You're just a pacifier away from peace. Just their plugs, little, little corks. I'm so sorry. Okay.

Don't ever apologize, Will. So sorry. Not for that. Apologize for a lot of other stuff. No, that little asshole needs to. Hang on, Will. Jesus. Jesus, Will, but your mic is still on.

No, I know. She needs, she's, we put headphones on her so she could listen. Oh, she's listening to the podcast. She's a quack. She's got notes. So went to Letterman from there and this was working my way.

How was Letterman? I mean, was that a, was that a dream come true? It was a dream come true. It was also, it was my second job. This is, I was terrified of, I did not do as good a job. I thought it was going to be a match made in heaven because this is like, he's my all time,

one of my all time comedy heroes. He's, you know. Same, same, same. And just grew up, he was part of the formation of my sensibilities, you know? Just dash of this, dash of that. What was a writing process like on that show? Was it basically writing monologues

or coming up with top 10 things? No, at the time, there was a guy, Bill Schaft was writing the monologue stuff and we would do top 10 lists. We'd do viewer mail. We'd do sketches. So everything that was comedy stuff besides the monologues was the writers.

And there was a team of, I don't know, 12 or 14 or something like that. And you sit around a table every day or was it once a week or, you know what I mean? You would never sit around a table. You would write stuff in your office and then you'd turn it into, you know, some thing on a door.

Oh, really? And then, yeah, it was an interesting system. You mean like one of those little folder catchers like on the outside of a doctor door, you just drop your ideas and come on. Exactly, that's exactly it. And you wouldn't work with the other writers? Sometimes you would.

Sometimes you'd go in and write. I have a lot of guys I still am friends with. Rodney Rothman was writing there when I was there. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Carter and Craig. I don't know if you know those guys. They were good friends. Everyone was really...

Did Glaser write a letter before Conan or no? I don't think so. Glaser, though, he was on the Jenny McCarthy sketch show. Oh, he was? John Glaser. I think that was his second show he had worked on. John Glaser, one of the all time funniest dudes. Yeah.

Will, do you miss Saturday Night Live? Do you miss the camaraderie, the writing of the sketches, the being in the sketches, the schedule like... Snacks. Every week. The schedule, no. I miss all the people, but they become like a family. So you still keep in touch with everybody.

But do you miss being on the show and getting your ideas out in that way? I was always nervous about the show. Yes, I do miss the show, but I also there's not really a part of me that wishes I was still there. Too much anxiety. It's just very stressful and I watched Fred.

I came in the year with the Fred came in too. Fred Armisen, listener. Fred Armisen and he just had such a joy to perform and wasn't nervous at all. And I was just shitting my pants all the time. I was terrified. It got better over the years, but it still was something that was just always terrifying

for me. You were always very fastidious about it too. Like you were, when you were in the, I remember pre-show, you would always be going over your shit, whatever. You'd always be like really in it. Like you didn't, not to say that you weren't loose, but you were, you, it was important to you to do it well and do it right.

Like you wrote, you're very meticulous in that way. I mean, that is a compliment, by the way. Well, it's, that can be a really good thing and a really bad thing. And, you know, sometimes it would be great because sometimes that level of preparation and trying to hit stuff in a certain way really works. And then sometimes you're just too tight.

And it just kind of... Seems like there's always a good balance between cast members that take it very, very loosely. Like in other words, kind of smiling all the way through it, almost laughing all the way through it. And then other ones that are, they're almost off book. They don't even need the cue cards. They're so well rehearsed and serious about it.

It's a sort of a great little cocktail. But bottom line, the experience of a lifetime, it's what an honor to be there, but I'm happy to watch it as a viewer now. Cause I get stressed even when I watch it as a viewer. I go, ugh. How weird is it now though, all these years later, and you start writing this, you know,

you start this character, you and Solomon write this character, McGroober, the sketch. So funny. That is super, I know. There's not enough room for the applause. And you start this character, this running bit, which is so great.

I love the way that the bit is always a runner in the show. So it's always a series of like three or four little minute long things, right? And you do that over the course of a number of years, then you make the movie. And then now years later, you guys have just made the series, McGroober. Is it weird to think like, we just wrote that as a bit.

And we're doing it now as 2021. Very weird. When we first did it, I thought the first one was like, it was fun and fine, but I don't think any of us ever thought this will be anything more than just a one-off little short that we do. I was kind of surprised that the audience

seemed to respond to it. I was like, oh, you like this, huh? Well, MacGyver was a very big hit at the time that you guys launched that. Can I ask an in the weeds question? It was, is the McGroober and the whole thing, is it close enough creatively for you guys to have to cut in the McGyver people

on rights and licensing and all that stuff? Or did you get enough separation where you don't have to worry about that? That was something that was... Parity, right? Tough during the movie because we're trying to, I think there was a cease and desist letter and then we had to make sure to go in and...

That means you're doing it right, by the way. I mean, at the end of the day, with the movie stuff, especially, there was not a ton of crossover between what McGroober does and what McGyver did. It was a jumping off point and then it kind of... The sketches, definitely, yes. But then once the movie version of it

is so different than the sketches, there's like a whole different mythology. So the good thing about, we just got a chance to do it as a series and we're just finishing editing it right now. But early on, when we were trying to do this, the McGyver people gave us their blessing and so that was an awesome thing.

That was just like a green light and we didn't have to worry about it. One of my favorite movie, quite literally, cinema scenes of all time. Can I guess what it is? And it's so forte, it's beyond belief. Yeah, go ahead and guess. Is it when he pulls his pants down

in front of Ryan Phillips, crying? No, that was so funny. Sean, get up and huddle into the other room. Take your chair away from the table. Okay, okay. Breathe through your nose. Sean, I like that scene too. I think it makes me laugh, so all right.

No, it's when the guy tells him off and Forte's like, fuck you. And he takes it and he goes, whatever, like 4-H-C-X-Y-Z, 4-H-Z. And it's the license plate of the guy who's told him off. And he keeps repeating it, right? And he's like 4-H-Z and he keeps saying it. And then way later,

Ryan Phillips is going through McGyver's stuff and he finds this notebook and he opens it up and it's page after page of just the license plate. And then killing the guy and blowing the guy up. Page after page after page of his fucking license. That is hilarious. I still have that. That's one of the things, that notebook,

it's a KFBR 392, I have that notebook and then the Miata. We bought the Miata for like a thousand bucks from the production. Did you really still have it? You still have it? Yeah. Okay. Do you drive it?

Yeah. Never drove it once. And then they had to tow it out of my garage to use it for the series. Oh, that's fantastic. That's great that you kept it. Oh my gosh. Oh yeah, yeah.

Wow. Now, Will, let me ask you something about writing because, you know, one of my favorite TV shows of all time is Last Man on Earth. I've seen every episode and when it came out, I was like, ah, finally like a show that is, you know, because it's been a while, I've been like a dry spell since a really great comedy

came along and it was so funny. It was just so interesting and different and hilarious and laugh out loud and funny. And did you have, and I know you wrote it and you started it and you directed a lot of them or all of them? I don't know. Is there- I didn't direct any of them because I was too busy writing

and doing all the other stuff. So we had a bunch of wonderful directors. Okay. And so do you, isn't that just all consuming and overwhelming and would you do it again? Or is there a part of you that's just like, you know what? It's so fun to just show up and act and somebody else is-

Oh wait, is your daughter fighting a bobcat? Oh, here she is. Oh, here she comes. The little angel. Oh, look, it's a baby. Listener, we have a very beautiful baby here. Looks like most babies accept the added beauty. Oh, my God. Look at that.

She's playing with the microphone. Will, she's incredible. I'm gonna say something to Zoe. Hey, Zoe, what do we have for breakfast this morning? Okay, listen, she knows a cue when she hears one. Exchange numbers with Bateman and he'll send her some tips like on how to like lose water weight or whatever, like all the good, you know, important.

Oh, she's really, really cute. Well, she is absolutely gorgeous. Yeah, she's so cute. Look at that. Sean, this is a great opportunity for us to talk about where we're at with adoption conversations with you and Scott. Go ahead.

Yeah, I had a long question, but let's skip that. I'll answer your question after this. Okay, my motto is I'd rather regret not having them than have them regret it later. I'd rather regret not having them. Well, it's a great sound bite. I mean, look, we're not looking to write something like above the wall, you know, at the door

at a football locker room. You know, we're not looking for new Rockney words. We slap on the way out to the pitch. Hey, look at, remember Sean said this? Yeah. All right, at the end of 2021. It's a war cry. Oh yeah, sorry, I know your death date.

Sorry, I should have mentioned it. I know your death date. I fucking, I should have. Oh my God, you know what? I had, there was a guy in high school, he took a lot of acid at this high school I went to. It was not a real academic tower, but yeah, this guy took a lot of acid

and the kids we were in class with, he said, no, this guy, his gift, he can tell you your death date. He can close his eyes and he can tell you how and where you're gonna die. No kidding. You know, he's just a 10th grader like the rest of us. And so, yeah, one lunch or nutrition or whatever,

I asked him, he said, he said, I got you in a hotel room surrounded by a bunch of bottles, middle age. That's awful. Yeah, and then he just turned around and kept walking. And I'll just never, you can't unhear that, right? You can discount it, but you can't unhear it. And so you've spent your life trying to avoid that.

Well, yeah, that was probably had something to do with my decision to go ahead and stop the drinking. Sure, and you remembered it because it was so fucking traumatizing. Well, yeah, you can't forget stuff like that. By the way, I did a Ouija board thing in high school, just messing around. And it told me when I was gonna die,

it said that I'm gonna die when I'm 73 by getting stabbed. Oh my God, yeah. Wait, so you are gonna end up having some enemies. Yes. You don't have any now, but I don't know. Kind of fun. Or maybe it's a good friend. But see, like you're never gonna be able to forget that.

When you turn 73, when you wake up that first morning 73, you're gonna say to yourself, well, now I got 12 months to watch my back. I gotta watch my back this year. Oh yeah, I'm getting a fricking, like a bunker. I'm just gonna wait out that whole year. Yeah, like a panic room. I always wanted to get a clock

that counted backwards from like 80 years old. And it would tell you how many hours, days, minutes, seconds you have left to live. So you've already predetermined that you're gonna take 80 and... Well, you just pick a random, like let's say 80, because maybe your grandfather died when he was 80 or 75 or 95 or whatever it is.

But then you hit start and it counts backwards. Wouldn't that be wild to wake up and say, I only have this many hours left? A lot of anxiety. Well, what's gonna be enough for you? What's your number? Like Forte, what's your number? If you go, if I died this age, I'm fine with it.

I mean, I think I'd like 80 sounds. Like, you know, not that I don't want to live past 80. 80's young. Yeah, that is young. My dad's 83, Jim Arnett. Yeah. Yeah, for Jim Arnett. Let's hear it for Jim Arnett.

For me, it's gonna be 90. Anything over 90 is gonna be bonus, but I really feel like I can make it to 100. I gotta... How is your family history? You got two. So far, so good. Knock wood.

Yeah, dad's 85 and like a bowl. Okay, awesome. Mom's doing well too. Okay, Sean. I'm good anywhere between 75 and 80. Sean's dad is 85. Sorry, he's doing 85 on the... The opposite direction of where Sean is.

Yeah. He's doing great. Right. Yeah, three of my grandparents died like 97, 97, 94. And my great-grandmother died at 105. Wow. Yeah. Oh, you're sad.

But see, here's my thing. You can't do the things you want to do after 80. Like you can't... That's not true. That's not true. But I mean like, you know... 83, my dad's very active. He's out.

He goes to the trainer a couple of times a week. He's out cross-country skiing and snowshoeing. And he's in Canada. Oh, right on. He's trying to stay on brand. Oh, is that right? Oh, is that right? Willie, did you see the Leafs last night?

They just can't get the puck out of their own zone. They gotta give her, yeah. Guys, you gotta give her. We'll be right back. All right, back to the show. So Forte... Yeah. So...

Can I get an answer just for my question? Let's double back to your question. So back to that, thank you first of all for the nice things you said about Last Man on Earth. Yeah, I love that show so much. That was a dream scenario of getting to like have your own show and control it. Right.

And it was also... But overwhelming, right? A nightmare in terms of what it did to my physical and mental health. Cause like, just because of my mental makeup, like I'm very OCD, I'm a perfectionist, which would be surprising for people who see how I keep my body

and basically everything in my life. That's not true. Nothing is perfect except for my little baby. Will, you look good. You always keep in touch. Yeah, so do you prefer just showing up being an actor instead of all that control? Well, I mean, there's a wonderful part about that.

You can just, like if you have a lot of trust in the people who are the directors, then that's the best because you're just coming in, doing a job, you know, have a life outside of it. You don't have to worry about all the post-production and doing sound mixes and everything. It's a tremendous amount of work that goes into this stuff. And if you're somebody who's gotta have his fingerprints

on every single part of it, cause you're, I don't know, I'd like very specific things. And if you're willing to give up that control and with Last Man on Earth, I was not willing to give it up. And I was like, okay, I entered into this. I'm just gonna wait till it's done. And I would just go nuts.

Well, here's Forte's dedication. I remember going to like some award thing or whatever. And you were, it was that part, I think it was maybe season two of Last Man. And you had shaved half your face and half your head. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Right? Was that season two?

Yeah, I had a big long beard. He had a crazy long beard and crazy long hair. And then just everything was shaved on this other half. Completely, including eyebrow, completely shaved on that side of the head. And so from, if you sum from the profile, he looked like you're like, oh, look at Forte. He's like, let his beard go and stuff.

And then he would turn his head and you're like, Jesus, what the, it was incredible. Yeah, it was really cool. So Sudeikis plays my brother on the show and he, long story short, he, as a prank, he shaved off the entire side of my one side of my body and left the other side very hairy. I did that once to a guy.

A guy passed out in my living room, shaved off his eyebrow while he was over. Yeah, he didn't know until he got back to college the next day. Well, it turned out he was dead, right? He never found out. So in the show, I didn't want to get him the satisfaction of knowing that he had burned me very hard.

So I pretended that I really liked it. And I wore it for several episodes, but that meant that I had to frigging wear it in real life, you know, keep that hairstyle in real life for a month. Oh God. That was so crazy. It was. That's so cool though.

It was so crazy. And then so, who do you have now in the new season of McGroober? Who do you have? Because you mentioned, you know, you work with a lot of same people. You got Sudeik as obviously some of you worked with an SNL and he came on Last Man.

John Solomon has been a collaborator with you for many years on writing stuff. And so, is John's part of this new McGroober series? Yeah, John, Yorma and I are two, three original. Yorma was the one who had the original idea, which we then, the three of us all wrote everything together, me, John and Yorma. And then Yorma directed the movie.

People would know Yorma for just for Tracy in Wisconsin. Yorma is one of the Lonely Island guys and wrote and directed and performed in many sketches, especially, you know, they started those digital shorts at SNL. Yeah, Andy Samberg, they're gonna box the Lonely Island. Yeah, yeah. Chikoni, last name?

Chikoni, yep, yep. Chikoni. Chikoni, like he directed the movie and just did an amazing job directing the movie. And now there are eight episodes for this McGroober series and Yorma directs for, John directs for. John's an amazing director too and directed a bunch of Last Man on Earths

and wrote a bunch of them too. He's, he's. John Solomon is a brilliant. Top of the heap. Yeah, a brilliantly funny guy. Both those guys. Where are we gonna see this McGroober show? It's on Peacock.

Got it. Peacock. That's great. Wig's back too. Wig is back. Yeah. Wig is so. Kristen Wig.

The three main people, me, me, Kristen Wig, Ryan, Philippi are all back. And then Lawrence Fishburne has a big part in it. And Billy Zane is the bad guy. And Sam Elliott plays my dad. Wow. Oh my God. Yes.

And they're all amazing. Lauren Michael's still collecting a fee for this. Yep. Yes. Oh yeah, yeah. Lauren, it was so fun. Oh, good. He makes this whole thing happen.

Like, it's people, I mean, as you would imagine, this show just came, or the movie came out and just shit the bed so hard, just incredibly hard. Yeah, and Lawrence basically, what three of the six feathers on the Peacock. I mean, he's, he is Mr. NBC. He's amazing. So he's, you know, his, obviously none of this would be

possible without it. I mean, none of my whole career would be possible without him. You know, he's, everything I have, we'll thank him for. Well, he's got good taste. He's always been a champion. You really tickle him, I think.

He legitimately loves you. I love him. He's wonderful. So it's, you know, yeah. I mean, I hope, I look back, my answer with Saturday Night Live, I hope, I hope, you know, yes, I am happy to be away from the stress of it, but God, what an honor to be a part of that show and so many fun, wonderful people

I'm still friends with. Yeah, I told you earlier, Letterman and SNL, those were like my, those were part of what molded my sensibilities and then to get a chance to work at both of them is, you know, it's a blessing to be able to work at just one of your dream jobs. I got to do two of them. Yeah, not a lot of people can say that.

What kind of stuff do you want to do now? Now you're on the sort of the tail end. Maybe you'll do more McGroober after this. I'm sure it's going to be amazing. We know that you're going to, that you want to live at least another 30, maybe four years. We never got an actual answer on you, but. Well, I'm 51 now and I have 22 years left to live.

Oh, right, because you're getting stabbed at 73. Right, right, right. So what are you going to do for the next 22 years? When my daughter stabs me. Oh no, you think it's going to be hurt. I think it's going to be Zoe and. I'm kidding. That would be great.

Let's get another look at her. Let's see if we can see the rage in her eyes. Oh my God, she just came in the room. What do you, but I do want to get back into it. Where do you see yourself? Like what do you, what do you want to do? Do you want to write more movies for yourself? Do you want to do sketches?

Such a weird time in showbiz, right? I mean, do you want to. I'll tell you it like it's, as I said, it's all gravy. After, if I could have stopped after SNL, you know, everything after SNL was gravy, then I mean, getting to do that movie Nebraska, who I would have never thought I'd get a chance to do something like that.

You want to do more stuff like that? Oh, sure. I mean, I'd love to, I'd love to do everything, but the main thing, I just want to be in a situation where I can spend a lot of time with her growing up. And so, you know. And do something. Yeah, where you can be around.

No family's important to you. Cause you're very close. Cause I know you're really close to your mom and your dad. Oh my God. Your mom. That is okay. So let's talk about your mom. I love your mom.

First of all, I have an idea. But by the way, about, well, go ahead and tell everybody about my mom, then I can tell you my idea. Yeah, Will, let's hear about his mom. Well, his mom's incredible, Patty. She's one of the nicest people ever. She's got a lot of ideas, right, Will? Yep.

She's got a lot of ideas. Is Patty with an I or Patty with a Y? With an I. Thank you for asking. And she's such a sweet, you know, open, kind, warm, loving person. And you guys are really, really close, which I love about, one of the things I love about you

instantly is how close you are with your family and close you are and good you are to your mom and she to you. And it's just a great example of, and she's, you know, she knows that she's such a big part of your life and everybody who knows you and who's friends with you knows your mom. Oh yeah. And it's really awesome.

And she's the best. I mean, she's just a magical woman. She is, if you are somebody who doesn't love, not just like, but love my mom, there's something wrong with you. I agree. You're just somebody, I don't wanna be around. She's an absolute delight.

I've always loved your mom. But she, so yeah, she does have a bunch of, what I would say are very shitty ideas, just a bunch of shitty comedy ideas. And so she would always, when I was at SNL, she'd always say, oh, I have, Carol and I were talking and I have a great idea for this. And then just say this pretty bad idea.

And I'd say, mom, okay, mom, save that for the Patty Forte sketch show. So eventually I was like, that didn't happen enough times. And I'm like, I gotta do a Patty Forte sketch show. So the, as soon as time kind of opens up, we're gonna do a thing, which is basically it's a show which will follow her making her own sketch show.

I mean, that is such a good idea. She will write everything. She will make every decision. And so all kind of be in there, just like guiding her along the way, like, well, I don't think that's a great idea. But if you wanna do it, and she and her friend, Carol are going to write all the,

and she's 70, she's about to be 78. And Carol, I think is 80 or 81. And they're gonna fricking. You're anticipating this huge comedic train wreck and that that will be the fun of watching the slow-moving collision with God. It's gonna be... That's Zoe looking at daily.

It's just gonna be so amazing. Cause it would be, you know, you'll kind of follow the process and then the very end of each show will be the actual sketch that she's created. That's actually a really funny idea. It's gonna be, it's incredible. I remember you told me about that a while ago in my, you asked if I, and I said yes.

And I'm still, yes. Oh yeah. So each week will also like, it will, that sketch will include, you know, some kind of comedy heavyweight, you know, then I've asked Will to be in them. Oh my God. In addition to a comedy heavyweight.

Jason, Sean, if you guys would ever, it will make it very easy for you. Just a couple of hours pop in, be in a sketch with Patty Forte and Carol. Anything you want. You're busy. Wait, Jason, are you saying you're very busy? No, I think Sean was gonna say anything you want. Anything you want.

I'm with, I'm with Arnett. My three rules are where do you want me to stand? What do you want me to say? And what do you want me to wear? Okay, we'll get to that later. Well, I mean, I don't know. Patty, Patty will tell you. Where do you want me to stand?

What is it, Sean? Where do you want me to stand? What do you want me to say? What do you want me to wear? And I'd rather regret not, and this is in addition, how long is this quote of yours? I'd rather regret not having where you want me to stand

than to never regret not what do you want me to wear. That's exactly right. That's in five, four, three. Three, two, one. Five, six, seven. All right. Ta-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Forte, let me just say, again,

you're one of my favorite people. You're so delightful. Every time I see you, I see, if you text or you call, it just, even when I don't talk to you, it just gets that feeling like, oh, yeah, will Forte. I'm so happy you're in the world. I feel that way about you guys. I was very excited to come on here

because each of you individually are so wonderful. And to have you in this unit is just like, it's almost too much for your eyes and ears to handle. Thank God we're not in the same room together. No, I know, it would be too electric. It would be far too electric. Yeah. I loved seeing you and hearing you, talking to you.

Will, it's been very, very too long. Yes. Yeah, well, hopefully, I'm in Atlanta right now, but when I get back to Los Angeles, maybe we can all together and hang out. I want to give you the opportunity, Forte, to say goodbye to each one of us individually. Go ahead.

Go ahead. Me first. Jason. Hi. It has been very nice talking to you. I appreciate the nice things that you've said to me. And I'm sorry that I could not have been a better guest for you today.

Well, I'm so glad that you came and appreciate it. This is now, and I will improve. I will take steps to improve for the next time I'm on if I am ever given the chance. Okay. I love you. Say hello to Amanda for me. Will do.

And and your girls. And then Sean. Yeah. My husband's name is Scotty. If you want to just. Scotty, beam me up, right? Wonderful. Wonderful.

Really, thank you. And that's it. I love you and you're wonderful. And I do, I do would love for you to meet Zoe at some. I want all of you to meet Zoe. Thank you. And please come over, meet Zoe. And I'm telling you, it's pretty awesome.

Let Jason talk you into it. It's the best. But if you make the decision not to, you're wonderful. Thank you. Well, thank you. I feel the same about you. And it's the right decision. Whatever you do.

Lovely. Will, Will, we've, of all three of us, we've spent the most time together. You're like a brother. You just mentioned our net's name and Zoe goes off again. I think that we, this is what we've identified the problem. Yeah. She wishes I was there.

Yeah. Go ahead. Sorry, Forte. No, it's just, it's, you know, in the same, the same thing you just said about me, which is very touching, I feel the same way about, about you. So, so I love you.

You will always be a brother to me. I love you too. And I want to see you more often. Same here. Same here. So thank you for letting me be a part of this podcast. Thanks for being here, Will. And today I feel smart more.

Nice. Oh, that's nice. I love that. After this experience. Smart more. Thank you, Will. You're such a delight. Such a delight.

Will Forte, thanks for your time. Thanks for your love. We love you. Love you, pal. Have a great day and love to Zoey and everybody. Thank you. Love you guys. Thanks, Forte.

Bye, Forte. Bye. Bye, William. Boy, another world-class prick. I mean, right? Could you just feel the anger and the hostility? Not one nice thing out of his mouth. Forte is, he really is.

He's one of those people, I hope you guys feel the same way that when you see him, you light up. Because he lights up, he just exudes positive energy. He's... Can't see him in a bad mood. No. Armistice in the same way.

It's amazing that those two are... They were a little bit of a duo on the show. Would you agree? Yeah. Kindred spirits. Kindred spirits, different, but came in... I've seen him the same time. Yeah, they were very kindred spirits.

I didn't know he wrote on all those things. Like that blew my mind. I was like, wow, I find that fascinating when people have this history of being in the business before you get to know them as a fan, you know? Like he wrote on all of those TV shows, not just that 70s show, but so many other TV shows. When we did the Brother Salmon,

that was produced by our friend, Tom Warner, great guy. And I know, Tom Warner, really old Tom. Tom had hired obviously Will to write on 70s show. So he was his boss there. And then years later, now here is starring in a film that Tom is producing. And I think, you know, it was like a very strange, like he wasn't known as that guy.

And all of a sudden, now he's doing this thing. Yeah, very cool. I know, so delightful to have people like that on. This is where Sean's brain goes to buy right now. I know. He's already... He starts to formulate. Three, two...

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, you don't have to... My... You know, you don't have to just... My... He's still, well, we've done take a big bite out of the apple. We've done that, we've done a Biden thing. Yeah. Did you see the way Zoe almost bite it?

The microphone, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Here's the problem, because I noticed, I don't know about your guys, but I wear my glasses whenever I can, but then I have to, the reading glasses, take them on and off. And I went, what I really need are a pair of... It's going, bye, Bocco!

Bye, Bocco! It's the best one ever, aren't it? Woo! Smart. Lass. Lass. Smart. Lass.

SmartLass is 100% organic and artisanly handcrafted by Michael Grant Terry, Rob Armjalf, and Bennett Barbaco. Smart. Lass. Our next episode will be out in a week, wherever you listen to podcasts, or you can listen to it right now, early on Amazon Music,

or early and add free by subscribing to Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts or the Wondry app.