Smosh Mouth - #60 - Solving Smosh's Problems Again

Episode Date: September 2, 2024

Amanda and Shayne have a 100% success rate in solving cast and crew's problems, and WILL continue to do so. SUBSCRIBE: https://smo.sh/Sub2SmoshCast WEAR OUR JOKES: https://smosh.com WHO YOU SEE Ian Hecox // https://www.instagram.com/ianhecox/ Shayne Topp // https://www.instagram.com/shaynetopp/ Noah Grossman // https://www.instagram.com/noahgrossman214/ Amanda Lehan-Canto // https://www.instagram.com/filmingamanda/ Erica Noboa // https://www.instagram.com/ericanoobs/ Oliver Wehlander // https://www.instagram.com/crocspapa/ Monica Ravitch // https://www.instagram.com/monicaravitch/ Andre Gardere // https://www.instagram.com/onwithdre/ Peter Ditzler // https://www.instagram.com/peter.ditzler/ Amanda Barnes // https://www.instagram.com/itsamandabarnes/ Vida Robbins // https://www.instagram.com/vidarobbins/ Marcus Munguia // https://www.instagram.com/marcus.munguia/ Matt Duran // https://www.instagram.com/durrrrran/ WHO YOU DON’T SEE (usually) Director: Selina Garcia Editor: Kortney Luby Producer: Amanda Lehan-Canto, Shayne Topp, Selina Garcia Production Designer: Cassie Vance Art Director: Erin Kuschner Assistant Art Director: Josie Bellerby Art Coordinator: Alex Aguilar Prop Master: Courtney Chapman Audio Mixer: Scott Neff Director of Photography: Brennan Iketani Camera Operator: James Hull Assistant Director: Amanda Barnes Executive Vice President of Production: Amanda Barnes Production Manager: Alexcina Figueroa Production Coordinator: Zianne Hoover Operations & Production Coordinator: Oliver Wehlander Production Assistant: Ovsana Tsaturian Post Production Manager: Luke Baker DIT/Lead AE: Matt Duran IT: Tim Baker Director of Design: Brittany Hobbs Graphic Designers: Ness Cardano, Monica Ravitch Senior Manager, Channel & Strategy: Lizzy Jones Channel Operations Coordinator: Audrey Carganilla Director of Social Media: Erica Noboa Social Creative Producer: Peter Ditzler, Tommy Bowe Merchandising Manager: Mallory Myers Social Media Coordinator: Kim Wilborn Talent Coordinator: Selina Garcia Operations PA: Katie Fink CEO: Alessandra Catanese EVP of Programming: Kiana Parker Coordinator Producer of Programming: Marcus Munguia Executive Coordinator: Rachel Collis OTHER SMOSHES: Smosh: https://smo.sh/Sub2Smosh Smosh Pit: https://smo.sh/Sub2SmoshPit Smosh Games: https://smo.sh/Sub2SmoshGames El Smosh (Spanish Dub): https://smo.sh/Sub2ElSmosh FOLLOW US: TikTok: https://smo.sh/TikTok Snapchat: http://smo.sh/OnSnapchat Instagram: https://instagram.com/smosh Facebook: https://facebook.com/smosh Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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In the meantime, it's great to be hosting the show with you again. Yeah, what happened? In three years. It the meantime, it's great to be hosting the show with you again. Yeah, what happened? In three years. It feels like we've been apart for so long. Yeah, the reality was I was on vacation for a bit, and then you were perfectly on vacation for a bit. So we did some guest episodes. It was fun.

Yeah, we had some great guests. Spencer, Alex, and I talked about Magic the Gathering for an hour. Oh, my God. Pretty much. God, I wish I was there the Gathering for an hour. Oh, my God. Pretty much. God, I can't. I wish I was there. I know. Dang it.

You would have had such a blast. Dang it. How could I have missed that? Sounds awesome. Yeah. Whereas Angela and I talked about vacations. Solid. And our families.

Yeah. And true crime all in the same episode. As expected. Yeah. People loved it. I know. We're sick. We're sick beings. Oh, yeah. People loved it. I know. We're sick. We're sick beings.

Oh, yeah. People loved it. It was really funny. People were texting me being like, I relate to this so hard. Yeah. Because everyone knows what it's like to go on vacation with your family. Go on vacation as an adult. It's very different. Yeah. It's not... Can it be categorized as vacation?

No. I feel like visiting family isn't vacation. I love my family I feel like visiting family isn't vacation. I love my family, but visiting family is not vacation. Wait, I actually have to ask you a question. Yeah. Do you work out on vacation? Yes. I knew it.

Of course I do. Well, it depends on the vacation. Depends on the vacation. Oh. But see, I work out on vacation because it helps me relax. Like, I wake up in the morning, I like to work out. That's nice. And then I just, I don't know, it gets that endorphin rush.

Yeah. And then the rest of the day, I'm like, okay. So you use the hotel gym? Yeah. Okay. I like it. Well. It's nice.

It's decided. That's you. It's decided. Angela and I had a whole beef about people working out on vacation. And we both agreed. It's hard to watch. Really? But it's great.

You know, sure. I just, for me, it's that if I don't work out, I just, I feel. You feel tense. I feel like, yeah, I need to get, like, I have energy that I have to get out. Yeah. And it just makes me feel comfortable. Better. I kind of agree with that.

Like a walk or something. Totally. Just anything. If I'm hiking in a day I don't need to work out. Oh no, that's a workout. If I'm doing stuff. If it's a vacation where I'm literally just lounging I enjoy it because

I don't know. It just makes me feel good. I get it. It's like part of the vacation for me. And hotel gyms are usually empty. So it's very nice. It's kind of nice that I get to do my own thing there. Yeah. Except for that one other person that's working out there.

There's always one person. And you have your headphones on and you know, and they either forgot their headphones or they have them. But then for them, you're that one person. Exactly. Yeah. You guys need each other. I know. But then for them, you're that one person. Exactly. Yeah. You guys need each other. I know.

Well, then I'm happy that you work out. Thanks. On vacations. Yeah. You're welcome. You're not on our shit list anymore. We were talking shit about you for the past few weeks. We were.

We'll stop now. Do we think Shane does this? And we're like, yeah. Yeah. I mean, what do you... And you read a lot. I've been reading a shit ton man. I've been reading so much.

You're incredible. Hey thanks. Wow. Truly. Well do we want to hop into some of these problems? Look at us. We are equipped to solve people's problems. We just solved our own thing. I work out on vacation. I read. So I'm ready to solve any problem.

Yeah. And I hang out. All right. Let's bring in our first client. Yeah. First client. Yeah. Yeah.

Ian Hecox. Oh, nice. Hey. Hey. Hello, Ian. Hello, client. Hey. So this is a real problem.

Okay. Oh, okay. Woo. Coming right in. Hey. Hello, Ian. Hello, client. Hey, so this is a real problem. Okay. Oh, okay. Woo, coming right in. Okay, so I have this friend, and we decided to have a race. A race? A race. Running. Okay.

Just kind of, yeah. Thank you for clarifying. And I kind of destroyed him, and I feel like ever since he's there, there's been this like lingering animosity towards me. Okay. Okay. I feel like I really humbled him because this is somebody that like really prides themselves on,

um, being very like physically capable. And I think for a long time, they prided themselves on never getting injured. Oh no, did they get injured? Well, I mean, lately they've been getting injured a lot more often, I think. They're starting to like, yeah.

Old? Yeah, they're starting to face how old. Old? Yeah. They're starting to face like how old they're getting. That's really tough. And I feel like, yeah, every time I like, you know, go by them, I sense this feeling like, you know, that they're just like this like wounded dog, you know, because they know like I destroyed them, you know? Do you know, Shane? You like really, you really passed them in the race. Like how many minutes were you ahead of them? Oh, I mean, like, I think we stopped counting, honestly.

Oh, that's awful. Yeah, it was, it was, it was really bad. That's really embarrassing. What do you think, what do you think I should do? I mean, I don't think you have to do anything. That's just, that's just something. Is this person Shane? Yeah, are you talking about me?

What? I mean, I didn't want to I mean I don't want to say who it is okay well okay we won't say who it is yeah all we know is they're getting old they're humbled yeah and they're upset with you yeah yeah and they're getting injured because they're getting super old and they've never and and we've never talked about it since then but I could just like sense it in them that they're like, that they've, they've just been humbled so bad because I beat them so thoroughly. Oh yeah. You're really nailing in the coffin right now.

Yeah. And I, I just, I just don't know how to, how to move forward in, in our friendship because I could just, I just sense they've never been the same since. Here's,

here's my thought. And I don't know who this person is. Who's very old. here's my thought and i don't know who this person is who's very old um here's my thought i would message them and go hey rematch question mark okay and then you'll be able to figure out where they're at because you cannot go on living like this ian i agree well they can't go on living i'm fine yeah you don't seem fine well i'm i'm worried for them oh you're worried for them right yeah do you have any advice shade yeah uh yeah um you know maybe go up to them give them 500 bucks whoa like hey dude sorry about this

uh you know you're getting old but here's 500 dollars there's the thing spend it how you want no i don't whoever this person is yeah i don't agree with that. Whoever this person is. I don't agree with that. Could do that. Not everyone's a winner. Slide up a couple. Not everyone's a winner, Shane. Benji's.

No. Okay. Okay, I'm guessing this is about me. I'm guessing. Oh, no. If we're talking about the FBI fitness test that we did a couple years ago. Whoa.

Oh, yeah. Yes. Oh, yeah. Yes. FBI fitness test. Whoa. Oh, yeah. Yes. Oh, yeah. Yes. FBI fitness test. Okay. Oh, yeah. Yeah, we did the FBI fitness test.

You guys needed that for Smosh? A bunch of things, yeah. But it came to the running portion. And I did about as bad as I expected I would do. And Ian, you're a runner. You are quite literally, that's your- Sounds like you're making excuses, Shane. Woo!

Excuses? No, I'm saying that I knew you were gonna destroy me at that. You did. So here's the thing. I think that you should text, so you should text Shane. Okay. Clearly, because Shane's the old person who didn't win.

Uh-huh, yeah. You should text him and say, rematch question Shane. Okay. Clearly, because Shane's the old person who didn't win. You should text him and say, rematch question mark. Okay. And whoever wins buys you dinner. And then it's almost like. Yeah. How about that, Shane? Okay.

Yeah. So Ian will buy you dinner. You're really good at running. Let's do that. What do you think? No boo? No, whoever wins buys dinner. Oh, whoever wins. Oh, whoever wins buys dinner oh whoever wins

because i want free dinner yeah but that's you not being mature yeah but that's you being a baby god i feel like i was invited to your house like walked in on this scenario no it's like we we do the race and it's like okay whoever whoever loses has to buy dinner and like as we get close to the finish line like i'm far behind i'm just like like it's like we do the race, and it's like, okay, whoever loses has to buy dinner. And as we get close to the finish line, I'm far behind. I'm just like, it's actually whoever wins has to buy dinner. Actually, it's that. Yeah, house rules. Yeah, you say it last minute.

That's my opinion. I think you guys should have a rematch, and whoever wins buys dinner, and you guys hug it out. And then it just becomes we walk for several days at a snail's pace. Well, great, that's fine. It's like two bodies were found next to the Silver Lake Reservoir. They were walking for weeks on end. Awful.

Well, thank you so much. I hope that you worked out. I've gotten a lot of clarity, and suck it, Shane. I feel like we weren't solving your problem. I feel like you were addressing my problem. Wow. We're starting here.

Thank you, Ian Hecox, for that. Thank you to our first client. Wow. Okay. Are you okay? No. Okay. No.

God, you're really getting a lot of heat right now. That hurts more than my shin splints. I'm so sorry. Not everyone can run. I, Mike, yeah getting a lot of heat right now. That hurts more than my shin splints. I'm so sorry. Not everyone can run. I, my, yeah, I'm bad at running. I'm not good at running either, and I should be running. I'm tall. I do the stair stepper.

Oh, yeah. I'm good at that. I can do that for like an hour. That's awesome. But running, I suck at. That's okay. My shins hurt. My knees hurt.

Yeah. So Ian, he's fine. He's just, you know what? He can run away. Yeah, he can run away. He did. Yeah. Yeah. He said what he needed to say in front of an audience and he left. Wow. I didn't realize he felt that way after that. Sounds like he's been holding onto it

for years. Marcus also schooled me at that. They both lapped me. We were at a park. They crushed me and I was like, yeah. I'm so glad you're just, you know, accepting it. It's awesome. It's okay. Good. We do the Goodwill hunting thing.

It's like, sorry. It's not your fault. Yeah. Yeah, of course. It's not your fault. Yeah, I know. Shane, it's not your fault. Okay, well, we are well-established people with good hearts.

Who's our next client? Yeah. Who's the next person to come in and diss me? Oh. Oh. It's Erica and her pup, Winnie. Hi, we say hi. Oh.

Little one. Is this the first dog you've had on a podcast? Yes. Wow, Winnie, you're so special. And we have so many dogs here at Smosh. We have so many dogs.

We'll just do a dog episode. Yeah. You should do. Let them all host their own show. That'd be real. No, we should set them all up here and then have poker chips and playing cards. Let's do it. Take that picture.

Yeah. Give them all a cigarette. Let's do it. Well, hi, everyone. Hi, Erica. We're here today for Winnie. Not for me. Oh, I love it.

Winnie has a bully. A bully? Yeah. It's my roommate's three-legged cat. Oh, God, cats are not safe. They have a brother-sister relationship and I'm an only child, so I figured you guys might be able to give her some advice on how she can stand up to him. Okay.

So is it day and night that she's bullied? Is she always bullying Winnie? So basically when it starts, Okay. So is it day and night that she's bullied? Is she always bullying? So basically when it starts is like they're extroverts. They love people paying attention to them. So when we have guests come over, yes. They're both Aries, if that's helpful. Oh, very helpful.

Shane loves that. Animal astrology. Shane loves that. They're fire signs. They're fire signs. I can tell your dog is a Pisces. I can tell. Oh, that would be good.

Can you tell? Look at her. Is this not Aries energy right now? She's Aries energy for sure. She's like, I'm taking over this. But it's when people come over and they're both competing to be the center of attention. And Charm will kind of slap her in a submission with his little nub and then his other little leg. It's very funny to watch. It's kind of badass.

It's kind of embarrassing for Winnie. Oh, baby girl. I love when how with dogs, so many of them, size like a creature so much smaller than them, they will be so scared of. Yeah. Just based on confidence. He'll stand in a hallway and she won't go down the hallway

because she doesn't want to go past him. So funny. This is pretty real. So you have a little battle going on in your household. Yeah. And the thing is, they do snuggle with each other when it's quiet and it's like one person. But then they're embarrassed when other people are around and they have to show that. Okay.

So when people come over, what if there's like a equal parts attention vibes. Like what if they greet Winnie outside maybe and then Winnie gets her moment and then they come in. You could get some like red rope and make like a VIP section. Oh, I love that. And put one of them there. Like for one party, it's like, okay, hey,

like you talk to the cat, you're like, hey, you booked the VIP section. The cat's like, I know. The cat's gonna feel great being in the vip section like this is my area and then like winnie's hanging out maybe closer to the bar like chilling with most people um you have a club in your house right yeah it's like a club yeah so like i feel like if you do that maybe the cat will be like okay actually i'm pretty cool so i don't need to bully winnie yeah i've got the vip section yeah the cat will be like, okay, actually I'm pretty cool so I don't need to bully Winnie. I've got the VIP section. The cat needs to feel cool and Winnie needs to

get her moment with people. So I guess, yeah, rope off half your house and do a VIP section for the cat. What do you think about that, Winnie? Are you cool with Charm being VIP? You know what? The thing is Winnie will just have to deal

with it. In a sibling's relationship, you're put into your role at a young age and you kind of just have to accept it. It's not until you get older and get some therapy that you realize, I don't need this role anymore. So maybe we get Winnie a little therapist.

Oh, do you need to go to therapy? She's like, no, I need treats. You could also just sit them before a party. You could just sit them both down. Just be like, hey guys, I need to level with you. You know, just man to cat to dog here. You guys need to keep your cool. Do not embarrass me.

If you embarrass me, we're done. Pull the disappointment card. Pull I'm going to be disappointed. Erica is not a fan. No, see, animals understand all of human language. They do. They do. They pretend they don't.

She does. So that they don't have to, you know. Winnie knows English, and she knows a little Spanish. They're trying not to pay taxes, but they understand everything. And so you can just level with them. That's what, yeah, I agree. And I would say, as a sibling, you kind of got to give special attention to each of them. Otherwise, you just don't want someone feeling like the black sheep.

Exactly. You could also, before, you could let a bird into the house so the cat is preoccupied. Whoa! That's messed up. That's actually smart. It's like, you know. But the bird is not safe. No.

Oh, okay. This is like the lady who swallowed the fly thing. You're going to have to keep adding things. Yeah. But these are options. These are all options. They are things you can do. Do you have red rope?

No, but I can go get some red rope. Okay. Yeah. Make a VIP section. Yeah. Yeah. Make the cat feel good. Cats love a VIP section.

Yeah, they love a VIP section. And let Winnie know that she'll be okay. And she'll always have your love. And you're not. That's what we've gotten from you. Oh no, oh no. Wait a second. Hold on. Cats are fully evil. Yeah. I love

videos where a dog is like trying to sneak past a cat and the cat's just sitting there and then right as the dog is perfectly right next to him, the cat's just like mmm, got you. That's charm. It's devastating. You just have to deal with what the cat is. Evil. Oh yeah.

I'm just kidding. Probably cool. No they are. Charms are a really good boy. Cats are I wouldn't say that. Charms are a good boy. I have two cats

they are so sweet but I have to acknowledge sometimes I'm like you are demons. Like you are nature's demons. If I let you out of the house you will kill so many birds it affects the environment.

Yeah. I have to acknowledge that. You have to be contained. There you go. And house, you will kill so many birds it affects the environment. Yeah. I have to acknowledge that. You gotta keep them contained. There you go. And sibling nature. You just have to, you know, accept that this is

where they're at right now. They might have to work it out on their own too. Just gonna let them do good out. Exactly. Yeah. We give you a lot of advice there and I hope you take a piece of it.

Thank you. I'm gonna go get some red rope right now. Okay, great. Thanks, Erica. Bye, Winnie. Sorry about everything that's happening to you. God, siblings.

I'm imagining a pirate cat. It still happens when you're an adult. I know. When people come over and the siblings act up. Ugh, dude. They act up. For me, my little sister's always like, we're going to play Clue and everyone's going to play.

And I'm like, that's her thing. That's her acting up. For me, my little sister's always like, we're gonna play Clue and everyone's gonna play. And I'm like, that's her thing. That's her acting up. All right, our next client, Noah. Hello, Noah. Hi, Noah. Hello, hello. Hi to both of you. Hi, Shane.

Hello, client. Hi. Glad to be a client. I have a serious problem that I would like some help with. It's something I've struggled with, I think, my whole life. Even more so now that I'm an adult and have to provide for myself. I don't know how to cook and eat three meals a day. And I don't know if anyone can do that task.

It's so hard. It's so hard. I've known this about you. Man, I relate to this heavily. We've talked about this. I need advice. So you want advice on how to cook three delicious meals for yourself and actually eat them. Yeah, enough sustenance for a day.

Like, I feel like I go to the grocery store and I don't know what to get. I'm like, okay, I could get avocados to make guacamole. Maybe I'll put that on a sandwich. Okay, is that one meal? Do I do that every day? And then what do I add now? Do I go and get strawberry? I feel like in three days those are moldy. Do I go and get frozen rice? It's like, okay, is that

food? Do I just eat rice and beans? Well, it's a complete protein. It is? I can do that. Frozen rice? Maybe not. I don't know. I mean, I can some things that I have that, because I struggle with this and like, it does feel I'm like, it's part of being an adult just that I have to go to the grocery store all the time. Yes. And everything is so expensive.

But you meal prep. I do try to meal prep. And I mean, I try to eat a lot of food. What does that look like when you meal prep? So a lot of it, what I've gotten that's helped a lot is an air fryer. Huge. And also a rice cooker. Huge isn't the size of the air fryer.

Because I have one and it is so big and it holds oh wow i have a small air fryer but oh my god air fryers incredible big egg i don't know when it's from oh my god that sounds like an outdoor barbecue i think you found an alien ship i'm telling you it fits like six chicken nuggets and it's so big six chicken nuggets okay well huh um okay so you air fry i i air fryer is incredible but i also uh i make a lot of just like ground turkey like that's just a very easy thing i use like soy sauce and honey and like ginger and garlic i just throw that all into it and i like make that on a skillet um but a rice cooker is also incredible i, and that makes cooking rice so easy.

It's just like... So you'll just make like... So for how many days do you prep off of your ground turkey? Well, I'd say probably like three days. Because more than that and it's sitting in the fridge too long. So nine servings of ground turkey in the wok. No, no. Not necessarily. I'd say it's like, that's for like

dinner or lunch or something. I think for breakfast I'm often doing like oatmeal and hard-boiled eggs. Oh, that's hard-boiled egg. That's a good thing. I do have a lot of machines. I have a lot of machines. So I have a little machine that makes hard-boiled eggs. And that's also great.

He's got a lot of machines. I got a lot of machines. Everything that he does, he has a machine. Isn't that just a pot? What do you mean a hard-boiled egg machine? I have a great little, it's like 15 bucks on Amazon. It's a little thing that makes hard-boiled eggs. And you just put seven eggs inside this little thing,

and then a little bit of water, and you press a button, and then it goes off when it's all done. And you have seven hard-boiled eggs. And that lasts me a couple days. I think we've lost Noah. That's incredible. Okay, can I say, I feel like what would really help you is to do one of those boxes that get sent to your house that have these pre-meals.

Oh, the Factor things? Factor or HelloFresh. Hey, look, if you guys want to sponsor an episode soon, HelloFresh, Factor, and you want to send a code for me to try it out. I just think what you need is protein on the ready like you just what what really helps me is we make like a bunch of chicken and then we do soup out of it and then we freeze the soup and then we cut up the chicken in different things we'll make like chicken salad or chicken breast and then you just make a bunch of sides like freeze a broth yeah does broth have like vegetables and stuff in it no okay yeah and then you add all that after. Yeah. So I always have like protein

in the fridge somehow. How do you cook your chicken that you're just prepping? I bake it. You bake it? Yeah. Yeah, I bake it. Like a schnitzel?

I put the, I put the, No, that'd be fried. I don't know. I put the carcass in the, Carcass? Yeah. A whole chicken? Oh boy,

we're gonna have to start from ground zero. Like do you get, what I mean is like when you go, is it like a box of breasts? A box of breasts. Or like a container? That sounds awesome. We're going to have to start from ground zero. Like, do you get what I mean? It's like when you go, is it like a box of breasts? A box of breasts. Or like a container? That sounds awesome.

You know what you should honestly get? There's tons of cookbooks. I think what's really helpful is there's tons of cookbooks for any type of thing. There's cookbooks for meal prepping. So you can get a ton of recipes. You can be trying that every week. But what I like to do is during the week I eat very boring I'm eating as quick and simple as possible

but then on weekends is when I'm like okay now I'll like cook something nice something from a recipe book and I'll like something that takes a little bit longer incredible yeah you could like Shane said get a cookbook and make like a big dish that'll last you

three days. And then you eat off of that and then change up your breakfast. Yeah. Okay. Is that okay? I'm trying to imagine what dish is good for three days. But what I'm gathering here. Like a stew. There you go.

Hard-boiled eggs and soup. That's what I'm learning. And honestly, that sounds pretty good. Yeah. Just make sure to get some fiber, too. Yeah, get some fiber. Or take fiber pills. As long as you're eating protein and fiber

and then like some carbs I'll be alive. Your vitamins and stuff you'll be alive. Are you gonna do this? I'm gonna try hard-boiled eggs and soup. That sounds like my solution. Don't put them in the soup though. You can have more than that. No, no, no. I like the doctor that when I walk out. And then have bread.

Bread as well. Look at that. I'm a new man. Bread, eggs, and soup. Bread, eggs, soup. You come in next week just super buff, like seven feet tall. You're like,

I found out I wasn't eating enough food. This is not going well. Thank you so much for the advice. Yeah, no problem. You're so welcome. And also,

just grab some protein bars for yourself. You know what? I will check out the kitchen when I leave. Okay, honey. All right. Thank you, the kitchen when I leave. Okay, honey. All right. Thank you, guys.

Thanks, Noah. Thanks, Noah. Wow. Honestly, I feel it because it's a weekly frustration for me of like food is just really hard. Food is very hard. It's so expensive. It's so hard to like navigate.

And yeah, getting fresh food, it goes bad so quickly. You want to change it up. It goes bad so fast. Yeah. No, I understand when people like shame people for not having healthy diets. I'm like, it's fucking impossible. It's so hard and it's expensive. Yeah. Healthy diets are really expensive. It's

ridiculous. Yeah. Okay. Anyways, we're killing it. Next client. Next client, Ollie. Ollie. Ollie. Good. How are you? Good. I just have a little problem. Uh? Ollie. Good. How are you? Good. I just have a little problem.

Uh-oh. Okay. So if you don't know about me, I really like K-pop. Okay. And my favorite group, they're all in the military. And I don't know how to cope with that. Well, one of them is back technically. Are you talking about BTS?

Wait a second. Wait a second. BTS is in the military? Well, they have to. Yeah. In Korea, all men have to be in the military. Oh, okay. Got it.

How do you think that is? BTS in the military. Imagine the military. It's like, all right, here's your bunkmate, and it's the most famous person in your country. Yeah, do you think that they're in bunks? Are they doing military on the computer? You understand what I'm trying to say, right? Can you work from home?

Technically. Because one of the members is technically back already, but it's not the same without all seven of them. Well, yeah, he's the only one singing. Are they going to reform? Yeah, they're planning to come back in 2025 once all of them are back. I remember when this happened.

This was insane because BTS is still the biggest band in the world. And it's like, oh, they have to go do military now. You're like, what? They're just gone. How long have they gone for? Two years, right? Yeah.

Whoa! The one that just came back, he went first. And then the next one comes back in October and that's J-Hope and yeah. Then the rest come back in June of next year.

I thought one of them had a single recently. Yeah, they like pre-did a whole bunch of stuff so they're like still releasing. Crazy. Okay,

so they're like, it's crazy. They're feeding their fans right now but you don't know how to cope because it feels so long. Yeah,

and it's like they're not physically here. So it's like, because they usually would go live and stuff. Yeah, there's a couple thoughts here. One is you could try to make your way to Korea and enlist in their army. I was going to say that. No, I wasn't going to say that.

You could literally be BTS army with them. I was going to say you could just, yeah. I'm just saying that's an option. Infiltration, number one. I was saying you could go to Korea and feel close to them, not join the military. Go to Korea and just feel them there. True, true.

Another is, I mean, do you like other K-pop groups besides them? I'm really into ATEEZ. They're like one of my second. Okay. Oh, they're your second. Can they maybe, you know, bump up to first right now? It's really into 80s. They're like one of my, my second. Okay. Oh, they're your second. Yeah. Can they maybe, you know, bump up to first right now?

It's just not the same. Oh, it's not the same? It's not the same. You might have to like just fake it till you make it. Just tell yourself, this is awesome. I love this group right now.

They're my one. True. I did just see them live too and they were really good. Oh, well there you go. You saw them live before. Oh, the 80s. Not BTS. Got it. Yeah, you could do like what i've been doing

where i'm learning music um so you could just try to listen to a bunch of the other k-pop groups because there's like five million right basically i feel like there's a new one every week and they're just like have you heard have you listened to i don't know it's have you listened to jean shorts like what do you feel like if you listen to other k-pop groups do you think that you're like you know going against bts do you think they would find out true they do make jokes about that sometimes like while you're cheated on bro you're gone for like a year or two like it's. So you're a little bit like, you feel guilty. Yeah. Well, let me tell you, Ollie, you have to live your life, and you can listen to other K-pop groups.

Thank you. We're saying that right here, live on television. Have you listened to every single BTS song? Yeah, I think so. No, everything. Because sometimes when there's kind of like a halt on new content, I take advantage of it. I'm like, sweet, time to catch up. Yeah.

Because that's like when, oh, there's like, you know, I don't know, there's like, oh, there's no new shows right now. Or there's no new video games for a bit. I'm like, sweet. I have my catalog that I can get. So I sometimes take advantage of that. But I also feel like you're in the end stretch here. They're going to be coming back soon.

Yeah. The only thing that I'm not caught up with, they have this show called Run BTS on YouTube and it's like they do variety shows. It's kind of like a challenge bit. And you haven't watched all of this? No. There's like 150 episodes.

Ollie! 150 episodes? I'm almost done. You have work to do. Ollie, almost, I'm almost. Ollie. You have work to do. Ollie. Yeah, you literally, you actually, BTS wants you to do this work.

Okay. You have to do this work. I'm gonna put in time. On my lunch, I'm just gonna watch everything. Oh, great. Yeah, don't take any breaks. Just watch. Just. But I will also say the anticipation for things

is often better than the thing itself. I agree. I think back on it, that anticipation is so nice. It's like Christmas. Kind of enjoy this feeling for now. You're so excited when Christmas comes and then it comes. Only months.

And then they'll be back. Exactly. Yep. So just sit in this moment and then watch their challenge pit video. Exactly. Thank you so much. I feel, I feel better.

Good. Thank you for validating me. So welcome. BTS is not mad at you, I promise. It's going to be crazy when they're back. Because it has been strange that they've been gone for so long. Yeah. BTS.

They're huge. You've been listening to them a lot? I don't listen to a ton of BTS, but I like a lot of them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. K-pop is awesome. Yeah, it is. They seem so cool. I did not know that they were on a military,

like it's just something they have to do. It's insane. I thought in some countries if you didn't, if you like went to college or you had a job, you didn't go. I think in South Korea you literally have to. Got it. Heard.

Yeah. Wow. Anyways. Anyways. All right. Okay. Next up. Monica.

Does anyone call you Mon, Moni? My parents. My parents are like Mon. Mon could be. I love it. Okay. Anyway. Hi, Mon.

Hi. First off, I want to say, you designed the Brutal t-shirt. I did. And I was very happy with that. That design is so cool. And that's all thanks to you. Thank you so much. Great job, Monica. That was my first merch piece. Whoa design is so cool. And that's all thanks to you. Thank you so much. Great job, Monica. That was my

first merch piece. Whoa! It was huge. Our merch right now is better than I think it's ever been. It's killing it. It's so good. Yeah. I'm rocking the essential right now. That's amazing. I went on vacation and every one of my family wanted to wear a Chronically Offline.

My dad was like, show me a link to that. Chronically Offline. I was like, okay. I loved those pictures. The whole fam. Yes, the whole fam. I didn't even have to do anything. They would just wear it. And I was like, hell yeah. They loved it. So what brings you in today?

I'm really stressed. No pressure. You're getting married. I'm getting married. I am two months out from my wedding day. Just about. So no pressure. You're getting married. But I'm getting married. Whoa. I am two months out from my wedding day, just about. Okay. Two days in a week.

And I'm stressed. Yeah. So the gist is, of course, we are keeping things small. But the closer we get to the day, the more details, pressures, expectations, things people need from me continue to pop up. And lately I have felt so much more overwhelmed than excited, which is not how I want to feel. It's such a bummer, not how I want to feel going into things. So as two people who have been through it and come out the other side, I would love advice on how to just like, I know stress is inherent in the process, but I would love advice on how to put it to the side a little bit more and

make room for like excitement and fun through the planning process. And therefore set myself up for success for like the most stress-free day possible. Yeah. Let me tell you, I will say the first two months before you get married, it's where all the last minute details need to come. Yep.

And a lot of things will pop up from people. It is, and this might not be the best advice, but it is okay to feel overwhelmed right now. This is the time where you're going to feel the most overwhelmed. Yeah. I promise you, think about five days before you get married. You are going to feel okay. You are going to feel a lot of emotions. You will have a stress-free day. This is the time when you're going to feel the most overwhelmed.

Right. I promise you. But it will... This is the work that you have to do to have a stress-free day. Yeah. And that sounds so insane because it's your wedding. And even if it's small, but I also will say all the little things that keep popping up. Do you have a little website where you have a Q&A on it? Oh, FAQ. Yeah.

Oh, absolutely. You know what you can do? You can just send them a link to that. I love, yeah. Like literally, you can send them a link to that or have yeah literally you can send them a link to that or have your partner kind of take over i know and and that kind of has been the thing is like being like okay i can't continue to field no the questions if i have to approve one more outfit oh sorry family i love you family friends love you. I appreciate that you want my opinion.

I have such decision fatigue. I can't look at your outfit. You should say that with love. And then link them to the FAQ. Yes. That might, yeah, that might kind of backhand it. And the first question on it is, are you annoying me? It's like, yes, yes, you are.

Have you been texted a link? Here's the reasons why. Yes. What do you think, Shane? I mean, you know, for so many of these very reasons is why we kind of forewent like the big ceremony thing. But even then, it's still a lot. And, you know, we still had celebrations afterwards that were just kind of parties. But even still with family and stuff,

there's just expectations, you know, your family cares about you. And it's such a big thing for, for certain, especially like our parents' generations, like they just, it's like wedding. Oh my gosh. It's their thing. Yeah. Um, I think I do agree with Amanda that the leading up to it is going to be stressful no matter what, like it's kind of, you kind of have to accept that. I think what's most important is for you and your partner on the day to be like, all right, if everything goes wrong today, that's fine. Like it's about our reaction to it. This is just about having fun. And honestly, if, if you have a, if you take it in stride and you kind of celebrate when things go, don't go according to plan yeah it then makes it a more fun story you know like um as the best i have as an example is like on the day you know if it's a flat or a squeal a wobble or peel your dreads worn down or you need a new wheel

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to speak to an advisor free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Courtney had made like she'd brought flowers

and made like a little corsage for me and we get to the courthouse and she's like I totally forgot it. I totally forgot we don't have flowers and then one of her friends

one of her friends there sees some fake flowers on a desk and he just grabs it. He takes one of them off, puts it on my pocket. And then we had these like fake flowers and it kind of became like one of the most charming aspects of it. Because it was like, oh, we don't care. Like we're fine. And then I think another huge thing to remind yourself is as you're being stressed, it's like, okay, am I stressed about all these extraneous factors?

Or am I stressed like, but my partner and I are good and I'm not stressed about that. And I think that was occurring to me a lot where I'm like, I'm stressed about this party. I'm stressed about how things, and I'm like, oh, but I'm not stressing about being married. I'm not stressed about this. I'm like, oh, then we're good.

It's about you guys. And also I will say for me, I had like a little tribe who was a part of the wedding. Whether it wasn't, it was like my close people. I would rely on them to vent this out. I would be like, I need to vent. And also two days before, I told my whole family, if anything goes wrong in the day, I don't want to know.

Don't tell me. Don't tell me. But everything's going to be okay. You are going to have the best day. I know it feels bad to feel like you're stressed and you don't want to be. These two months will be a little crazy. Yeah.

Just put your heart into the things that really make you excited. Right. And just put your time on that. And then when you're done, shut it down. Yep. Go to sleep.

Yes. Shut that shit down. And if you wake up at 2 a.m. and order bubbles for the ceremony, do it. It's okay. That's the best advice. Thank you, wake up at 2 a.m. and order bubbles for the ceremony, do it. It's okay. That's the best advice. Thank you, guys.

Yes. You're welcome. Good to talk about it. Congratulations. Thank you so much. Thank you. I did do that. 2 a.m., you're like,

bubbles. Oh, yeah. It was the best decision ever. All the pictures has bubbles. Okay. Okay. Our next client, a returning client. Returning client? Oh, look at us. We're has bubbles. Okay. Okay. Our next client, a returning client.

Returning client? Oh, look at us. We're doing well. Yeah. Oh, they like us. They like us. They're okay. All right. Andre.

Andre. Cool shirt yet again. Thank you. Badass. You guys did so well last time I came back. I'm so glad. I was like, did we help at all? How are you?

I'm doing good. So basically my problem is I've been like historically introverted my whole life. Yeah. I'd say like both of you saying yeah to that is pretty crazy. I said yeah because I relate. I said yeah because yeah.. I said yeah because yeah. Dungeons and Dragons happens inside. Most weekends I would play video games, watch movies, bake now.

He's baking. I gave him a sourdough culture. I'm trying to get out of that introverted phase. I'm trying to go get out of that introverted phase. Like I'm trying to like go out and do more stuff. But like because I was so introverted, I don't know like what to do out there. So I need your guys' like recommendation from like Chronically Offline Queen and Shane Top from iCarly. I need you guys to like, what like in LA, like what are some like really good recommendations? Well, first of all, I just heard about a chess club.

I don't know if you like chess. I played chess with my family back in the day, but I haven't played in a long time. There's a chess club in K-Town. I just heard about that. Also, I don't know if that's something that excites you. The first thing that came to my mind. I'll play chess with random people in K-Town.

I'm sure that's the most extroverted thing you could do. It's very extroverted. Also, what about just kind of testing it out? Maybe like a Saturday morning farmer's market. Ooh. No. Okay, I guess Chess Club was a no, and farmer's market is a yes.

I love a farmer's market. I know, me too. That's the most middle-aged shit you could do, is go to a farmer's market, and I'm up there now. But where? What farmer's market. I know, me too. That's the most middle-aged shit you could do, is go to a farmer's market, and I'm a bandana. But where? What farmer's market? Oh, there's tons of good ones. There's tons.

There's tons. There's great. Yeah. But also, I feel like you're talking about, you're introverted, but you host a D&D session here at Smosh, which is a very, very extra. I think D&D is a very extroverted thing. I feel like people get together

and they play Magic the Gathering. I don't feel like you have to go outside of your interests to be extroverted. It's just like doing it with people. Yeah. You want to meet new people? You want to meet new people? I want to meet new people and do new things.

Ah, got it. Okay. Okay. I do think meeting new people is really hard. Yeah. I think meeting new people, but I feel like there are things to do. Like, I feel like especially in LA, there's like open mics. There's like

comedy shows. There's music shows. There's so many freaking things to do. How about like places to eat? Give me like one good place, like really good place that you recommend to people in LA. Like restaurants? Yeah, just like a real...

Two Madre just opened up and it feels like a very fun environment. See, this is what I'm looking for. Literal names. I want to Google these names and go there. That's something I feel like when you live in California, you can take advantage of. There's so much good food. I mean,

just so much. There's so much good food. And you can just invite people to go to dinner. Yes. That's just an easy thing to do. It's not hard to get people to want to do that. Yes. I also feel like Arts District downtown, there's a lot of places that you can walk to. There's Arts District, there's so much to

do. You go there on a Saturday and you just plant right by the sausage Saturday and you just plant like right by the, the sausage place and you just walk around and sausage place. Oh yeah. What is this? That's like one of my favorite foods. I think I'm going to actually have to write you a list. Oh yeah.

Actually, Amanda and probably Ian can give you a list of just incredible restaurants. I'll write you a list because there's an amazing sausage place with amazing German beers. And when you start there, you can just walk around. Holy. Holy.

Listen, if you like sausage and Germans, let me throw one thing I really like is Red Lion Tavern. Oh, I love Red Lion. The sausage there is incredible. It's amazing. The beer is great. The beer is great. That's such a good spot. Yeah.

That's like one of the good spots I found. And I'm like, I need more of those. Because I went there and I'm like, oh, this is great. That spot rocks. Got it. I'm going to write some things down for you because then especially if you're going to like maybe the soccer game is on like I don't know if you care about soccer

or anything like that but like you could just go and like have chats with people also there's places that do trivia night like hardcore trivia night I don't know if you care about that I think getting a trivia team together at Smosh would be a really cool thing we just won for Amanda Barnes' birthday! Yay! We went to a bar nearby and

we played and we won. I'm not too surprised. I've thought about that a lot. I'm like, this office could assemble an indestructible team. Oh, it would slay. Oh, yeah. But you would go, we would go, and you would sit so far away from us meeting new friends. Yeah. What trivia do you know? Let me get information from you.

Exactly. You sit in the corner with a hood and a pipe like Aragorn and someone's going to approach. That's how you meet people. It's canon. Dude, I'm going to write you a list. Yes, please. Done and done. Thank you.

Thank you, guys. Thank you for coming back. Yeah. I'll come back one more time if they allow me. God. Thank you, Andre. Thank you, guys. This is Andre.

There's so much good food It's so good I need to eat Ethiopian food We should go to a little Ethiopia There's a whole street What if you were just like We should go to Ethiopia I have a friend there

Just kidding Our next client, another returning client Actually no There was stuff about him in the last one All right. Our next client, another returning client. Oh. Actually, no. Sorry. No. No. No. There was stuff about him in the last one. No. Okay.

He's just coming in. Just walking on in. Peter. Guys, this is Peter. I can't even give you a job description because I feel like he does everything. Anytime we need him in a video, he's there. Yeah. He's incredible.

He works for social and he's back. Well, he's not back yeah yeah yeah i'm here to talk about how i got my ass handed to me by uh the local harley davidson bikers club the other month i don't know how much you guys paid them but i was unloading groceries and they smacked my tubs of novelty yogurt all over the pavement splattered all over the place and all for the sake of getting me to stop bullying Josh Fleury here at work. Oh my god. This is an advice column. This is a column.

We're Sex and the City. We're Carrie Bradshaw's. I think we have different ideas of advice because advice is helping that person figure out and fight their own battles. You kind of fought the battle for it. Did we say that we were going to get the Harley Davidson? You did, yep.

We did say we would go to local Harley Davidson and get them. Yeah. We're going to go to the local Harley Davidson and enlist the help of a biker gang. The evidence is there. Yeah. And so my problem today is I want to help Josh figure out how to fend for himself because you neglected to help him do that. Yeah, it was our first time.

We were taken aback. You're so right. You know what, Peter? You're right. I'm sorry. We thought of a quick fix. It was a quick fix. Which was to go to the Harley Davidson and splatter my novelty yogurts all over the pavement.

Those sound really expensive. Grape and watermelon flavored. Of yogurt? Yep. That's psychotic. Grape flavored yogurt? Nobody. It's my grocery run.

What? Where do you get this yogurt at? Kroger. Out in San Bernardino. Kroger does not have novelty yogurt. Where are you from and where do you live? What's happening here? What's your social security number?

Let's go back to josh okay i'm worried about him yeah next time he comes up to me and asks who can i send tiktok pitches to for social and i respond your mom what's he supposed to do he doesn't have the tools to help himself next time so you you want to keep bullying him but you want him to have the tools to stand up to you yeah i'd like a fair fight i want people to you know i want people to have the tools to stand up to you. Yeah, I'd like a fair fight. I want people to, you know, I want people to have their best interests at the forefront of their mind. I want them to fight for themselves. To stand up and...

Okay. Are you kind of saying, have you been bullying Josh, like, in the hopes that it'll improve his, like... You're trying to make him confident? Are you trying to make him tougher? That's all I want for people is to just, you know... You care about them. Oh, wow.

Yeah, improve their quality of life. Sweet, I guess. Next time he's in the lunch line and I come up and say, look at Josh Flusi building up to be a growing boy, stacking his plate full. What's he supposed to do? How's he supposed to respond to that? If you didn't give him any kind of comebacks.

You're right. You're so right. I guess we went on the route of violence. I'm so sorry. Violence begets violence. And I thought both of you probably knew better than that. You're right. Here I am, a month out from being smacked around like a little schoolboy.

Well, seems like you deserved it. I did take some paid time off after that. Whoa, you took some PTO for that? Yep. Well, seems like you're doing just fine. You know, Josh isn't you're doing just fine. You know. Josh isn't, though.

You're right. That's what I'm here for. It's Josh who's actually hurting in this situation. Right. A thought that comes to my mind, something that could toughen him up, is we could go to the local Harley-Davidson and send the biker gangs to Josh. They could start beating him up. And then that's a tough opponent. He's going to have to get tougher.

Whoa. So if he can handle Harley Davidson Cruz, then he could handle Peter. Shane, I think you've been overshadowed by Pete's way of living. Yeah. You're going to get some grape yogurt as well? I would say that Josh needs to stand up to you verbally.

Okay. I like that. You know what I'm saying? When he asks me, like, who took my mugs? Because he's been missing mugs and everything. Did you take his mugs? No, I'm not doing that. Let's not put that on there.

Someone else is doing it. Someone else is doing it. So someone else is pulling it. It's kind of coincidental. It's a beautiful coincidence, as I like to call it. But next time he comes up and asks and I say, your mom again. And he should say, your dad. Yeah, something like that.

One up me. Right. In a meaningful sense. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. So you want us to tell him this?

Yeah. I'm sure he's going to come on to the next. I'm sure. I'm solving whatever you do here. I'm not sure you even know what you're doing here. No. No. I think I'm out of my depth know what you're doing here. Oh, no. I think I'm out of our depth.

I started off by being told I was old and weak. So, not a great... I relate to Josh right now. I didn't know that that was about you. Josh could also carry his axe with him, his guitar. And he could shred. If you dissed him and then he shredded back at you,

what are you going to say? And then whacked it over my head. Yeah. Well, that's violence. Not violence, but violence. Yeah. But sometimes it's called for. We could give him a Yo Mama joke book.

Oh. And then he could read through that and he could throw some of those. Yeah, that would be awesome. Yeah. Yeah, that'll work. I do want to apologize for the motorcycles. Yeah. I'm sorry about the Harley Davidson.

Did you go back and get your yogurt? It was just uncalled for. But yeah, I mean, it was splattered apologize for the motorcycles. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sorry about the Harley Davidson. Did you go back and get your yogurt? It was just uncalled for, but yeah. I mean, it was splattered all over the pavement. So I did have to go back to the Kroger. It's a two-hour drive. But I reloaded. Two-hour drive to a Kroger. Yes.

Well, I feel like we should dig into that next time. Okay. That you're driving two hours to get yogurt. Just glad Josh has the right people on his side now. Finally. Yeah. We got him, buddy. You don't need to worry about it. This one's for you, Josh. the right people on his side now. Finally. Yeah, we got him, buddy. You don't need to worry about it. This one's for you, Josh.

Thanks. Thanks so much, Pete. I learned a lot. You know, the benefit of this whole situation is it did unite all the biker gangs

of California for the first time ever. It was sick. They were united in smashing his yogurt on the ground. And they all watched bike riders in film, in the movie. That's how Sons of Anarchy ends, with them in a parking lot smashing Peter's yogurt.

I know, I saw that. Yeah. That was such a crazy ending. I know, it's unexpected. It came out years ago, probably before Peter was born. Anyways, we'll figure that out. Okay, awesome, we're killing it. Our next client, Miss Amanda Barnes.

Amanda. Two Amandas. Two Amandas. Two too nice. Too nice. How's this? How's sound? All right, great.

She's so good. All right. Thanks, guys. Thank you for having me here. Yeah. Hi. It's nice to be here. So I have a problem. It's not as dramatic as your last. Thank you for having me here. Yeah. Hi. It's nice to be here. So I have a problem.

It's not as dramatic as your last guest. I'm sorry to say. Yeah. That was pretty insane. It's going to take some time for me to shake that one. Yeah. That's tough. Hopefully this one's easier, but I am struggling, so I do need some help.

Got it. I am very organized at work. I'm very scheduled. I have to be. I'm kind of a mess at home. I am not as organized at home. I see that. I feel like my schedule is all over the place.

And so I'm hoping you can help me apply some of the skills that I have at work to my home life to be a little less chaotic. At work, do you have a big calendar that you can see that you can write on in a race? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm making one in the hallway. It's like a cork board.

I live and die by my Google calendar in both places, but the things like meal prep or whatever, it's like, oh my God,

the spinach is gonna go bad and then I end up meal prepping at like 11 p.m. Yeah. Do you think you're just, in life,

you prioritize work over your personal life? She's like, we're not touching that. Thanks for having me. We're not touching, she's like, and I will get in my car and drive away now. Yes, Shane, I do. I do think that. I relate. If you asked almost anybody else that knows me in my personal life, they'd probably agree with you.

That's why is that you, A, probably have less time at home. That's true. Because you're here a lot more. You have more time to organize. And here is structured. At home, it's not structured, right? So you don't have the actual like, oh, this is my lunchtime. This is my dinnertime.

This is what I'm going to organize what if on sunday you structured a couple hours and you kind of went over your week with yourself and kind of chose a couple days that you were going to meal prep or i don't know what the messes in your place are like if it's clothes or physical mess as well, or is it just mess? It's just, it's just every, it's just mess all over the place. What if you took, what if you took two, what if you took like an hour or two before the week started so that you could actually be like,

Oh, my home is just as important as my office. Do you have like a, do you have like a, a space, like a desk or something like an office space in your home? Yes. Is it filled with stuff?

Sometimes. Do you put filled with stuff? Sometimes. Do you put stuff on it? Sometimes. Every, about once a month I go through and I like clean everything up and blank because it gets too messy and I can't think, you know? I guess for me it's like if I don't, if I'm not organized here I'll get fired,

but no one's gonna fire me at home. Yes, they will. That's harder. Yourself will fire you. All right. I think, think i think i think she needs like author like authority at her home i think you need your own authority for yourself set like boundaries for yourself set my own boundaries okay all right put myself on a discipline disciplinary plan could just probably set a reminder thing like okay maybe if it's just on Sunday, it's like, all right, at whatever time on Sunday for this hour, I'm going to like – I sit down and I get everything organized for the week.

I figure out what my time looks like every day. Figure out how much time I'm going to have outside of work on those days. What do I need to get done? And then you kind of like structure that out. Yeah. And then you kind of like structure that out. And then, you know, what's kind of refreshing about that is once you figure out all the stuff you need to get done, then you get to see really what your free time is. Yeah. And then you get to really enjoy that. Amanda.

Amanda. I think you're like me where you don't end up with free time because you're disorganized. Because I'm horrendously disorganized here and at home. Yeah. And what happens is then I'm always thinking about what I need to get done, and then I never relax. I get paralysis. And I have a lot of hobbies.

So if there's ever a free second, I'm like, now's my chance to go do this thing. You need to Google Calendar schedule free time. I think that's the solution. You need to put in your Google calendar from 7 to 9 is free time yeah I think you're exactly right if you're like me too with analysis paralysis

you need to do the whole like eat the frog thing which is just like whatever's like your biggest thing you gotta get done that day try to get it done in the morning like first thing you wake up and you're like I'm taking care of this thing for me it's like oh I have like a tax thing i gotta take care of i gotta write this thing like i wake up and i'm like you just get it done because then once you're done with that you have that refreshing thing you

feel accomplished and it kind of motivates you for the rest of the day i agree um but schedule it put if you live and die by your google calendar, schedule it. Eat frog. Yes. Eat the frog and don't put anything on your desk. Okay. That's good advice. When I put things on my desk, I go, well, I can't do the thing I needed to do because look this mail. It's on my desk. Protect that space. Make that space for

a thing and only do that thing there. Okay. Because when you start to mix it up, then your brain kind of... Yes. You won't regret the, the, the work days that you miss. You'll regret the days that you didn't do the thing you wanted to do. I quit.

Wait a second. Wait a second. Wait a second. Wait a second. That's great. Thank you both very much. We appreciate it. You got like 25 minutes left on your clock.

Thank you. Thanks, Amanda. Look, already on it. She's already on it. That's legit though. Oh, dude, I'm so disorganized. That, already on it. She's already on it. That's legit, though. Dude, I'm so disorganized.

See, I wouldn't think that about you. Mentally, I'm super forgetful and super disorganized. Whoa. It causes all my problems in my life. You're ruining my perception of you. Anyways, next client. Vida. Vida.

Hello, Vida. Thank you for having me. Hi, Vida. Vida. Hello, Vida. Thank you for having me. Hi, Vida. Excellent t-shirt. Thank you. Purple rain forever. Thank you. What's going on?

Well, I need your advice. Okay. So I edit a lot of the Reddits. Yeah. Oh. Yes. And a common thing is shitty guys who don't realize that they're being shitty. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. And a common thing is shitty guys who don't realize that they're being shitty. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yes. And I'm on a bit of a gender journey. I'm presenting masculine. I'm taking testosterone. And so I'm wondering, what's the secret to not be a shitty guy? Oh, Vito, you're not a shitty guy. I think it's like there for a while. I think a lot of it's societal. I don't think it's like, oh, this is in the testosterone.

Yeah. Like a demon that's... Yes. Well... Maybe some. I mean... I think it's very societal. I think we benefit...

I think a lot of it comes from men who are only around men and they only listen to men. And, you know, they're only watching podcasts or things with men telling them how to be a man, treat women and treat other people. I should stop doing that. Are you watching? Are you listening to a lot of that? No, no, no. Gotta stop listening to Joe Rogan. Dang it.

But I feel like, I don't know. I think about this a lot because that stuff does come up on my feed sometimes. And I'm just like, man, so many men are just surrounded by this. And especially nowadays, there's so many grifters pushing that movement. I just don't think that's ever going to happen to you because of who you're surrounded by also because of who you innately are I understand that you're taking testosterone and it feels like that's going to

because I do think that that changes things obviously but I think I feel like it's just like a moment where you check in with yourself and remind yourself like I feel like we all have responses, instincts that we react to, that we respond to.

Like someone driving by being like, nice boobs. Like it happens. Yeah. Okay. I know and I hate it. It fucking happens. But maybe take that extra moment to go, those are nice boobs. But I'm not going to yell at the window and say that.

Okay. I'll say it quietly to myself. So it turns out the person here with toxic masculinity is a man yeah what can i say i'm from boston listen people are beautiful but you don't like yelling at them on the street is terrible that's when when i think about very toxic toxic men i think about that so i just think as human beings we we have these instincts. I don't know. It's like coming from a deeper place. I think just check in with yourself. Yeah.

And also hang out with good people. Okay. I think by the sheer nature of asking the question, you are already not. Oh, great. Oh, look at that. Because I think so many men are taught like you can never be unsure. You can never ask for help. You have to be certain all the time.

So they go, they get led so, so astray and they refuse to doubt or be like, Oh, should I, you know, should I internally? Exactly.

No, no self-reflection, no self-reflection allowed in so many of those spaces. Um, it's, yeah, it's sad. Um,

but I, I would be shocked if you ever became anything like that i think for a lot of these dudes it is it takes it's like decades of yeah creating like how are you feeling right now as you're going through this transition oh i feel great oh good yeah it's great yeah yeah good it's just it's i, really being in the slog with Reddit stories. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I don't think this is... Reddit stories. This isn't testosterone. This is the Reddit flowing through your veins. I think the more you edit a lot of Reddit stories, and I can feel how that's like, whoa, remember, that's just a separate thing. You're not... That's not you.

Reddit is... We're reading the most insane stories. This is not normal. How do you walk out of a full day of Reddit normal? I think I'm very good at compartmentalizing. And also, like, it's, you know, I'm like, this is a real thing that happens to real people. Even if the story is fake, I'm like, this is a real thing that happens to real people. Even if the story is fake, I'm like, I know these things happen to people,

but I'm like, this is also, you know, I'm reading a story and I, I, a part of me does try to treat it as like a hypothetical because then it's, then it's not as intense on you. You also verbally process it where I feel like if you internalize that,

it just gets deeper and deeper. Whereas like Shane, when he's reading these stories, he's verbally processing it with people on the couch. And also Shane is very self-reflective. He's always asking himself the question, which I feel like is separates because when you don't ask yourself the question,

you're kind of like, yeah, that's true. That's me. I'm that person. I should speak out loud when I'm editing. Yeah. Well, I mean, think about it. But I also take the moment after all these Reddit stories

and I go, man, I'm so grateful for who I have in my life because some people really are in shitty situations. But what's also great is these people are presenting their stories and getting out of those situations. So I think there's often like optimism

in all these optimism. Yes. I feel optimistic. I'm so glad, Vida. Thank you. Thank you guys so much. Thank you for coming on. Of course, thank you. Anytime. Doing well with our clients.

That felt like the best one out of all of them. Yeah, it felt like we actually were like. I felt like that one felt good. Well, the Pete one, I feel like we gave excellent advice. Yeah, yeah. That one was solid. I'm still stunned that there's grape yogurt. I know.

Out of everything that happened, that's what I don't believe. Yeah. All right. Our next client, Marcus. Marcus! Is here. Round two. Round two of Marcus.

Returning client. Yes. How's the snoring? Oh, thank you. Lisa says gah. You're familiar. It's a collab. Returning client. Yes. How's the snoring? Oh, thank you. Lisa Says Gah. If you're familiar. It's a collab with Madewell. I just rented Lisa Says Gah.

Collab with Madewell. This is great. I love this shirt. Collab with Madewell? Lisa Says Gah has like all the, you understand. Courtney loves it. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. How's the snoring going?

Because that was what you were here last time. And the fart. Yeah, thank you. And the single fart. Yeah. Really quick, Shane. And the fart. Thank you. And the single fart. Yeah. Really quick, Shane. You destroyed the FBI fitness competition, so I don't know why you got the win. No, but my cardio is actually back.

That was really sweet. But you were great. Thank you. You are very physically fit. Thank you. And just because you're not the fastest runner in the world, I don't know. Doesn't mean anything.

Doesn't mean anything. Come on. Doesn't mean anything. No, I watched it back and I was like, my gait is crazy. Like, what am I doing? But yes, thank you both for asking and thank you both for the advice.

I'm happy to report that the snoring has stopped. What? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I figured out that it was due to seasonal allergies. Yes, so we got a little filtered air fan for the window for the bedroom. Nice. Cleared the whole thing up. Dude, they've been gnarly.

I'm so happy. Oh, yeah. Allergies. I had an inhaler for a month. I feel like they're killing people. It's terrible. It's been really bad. But yeah.

All right. Well, that's great. The air is fresh in our bedroom now, and it feels great. I'm so glad. No more snoring. Minus your farts. I was ready to get a pregnancy pillow. I almost went and got one.

You should. Yeah. Did the research. They're really farts. I was ready to get a pregnancy pillow. I almost went and got one. You should. They're really good for you. Yeah. A pregnancy pillow. It looks like a snake, and you basically wrap your whole body around it and put the pillow in between your knees. So it helps your lower back. That was the advice last time.

Do you want a pregnancy pillow? Sure. Yeah, that's awesome. It's all good. All right. He just has this huge pregnancy pillow. He's like okay uh so what brings you back here so i do have another problem that i was hoping to get

your help with okay um this is a true story true fact here about myself um my toe hair keeps scaring me i can explain explain. I can explain myself. So this happened to me one morning recently. I was hanging out, enjoying my morning. I get it. And I put my feet up on the couch to recline and relax. And I saw a spider on my toe. So I panicked.

And I was like, oh, my god. And I jumped up. And I was smacking my toe and I was flailing around because that's like my worst fear and I was like okay where is the spider I'm going to smash the spider and then I realized

the spider was just my toe hair it's gotten a little scraggly a little long are you Italian? I am Italian I am yes, I'm Are you Italian? I am Italian. Got it. I am, yes. I'm a quarter Italian. Quarter Italian.

Understood, I'm Portuguese. I get it. Well, I'm a hairy guy. Yeah. I'm not ashamed of that. Your hair's getting wild. It's getting crazy. On your toe.

You thought it was a spider. Specifically my toes. Okay, well that's- Big toe. Other toes are fine. Oh yeah, other toes are fine. They barely grow hair. The big toe? Whoa.

Yeah. Damn. That's legit because I have been scared by something that I thought was a spider, but it was never my toe hair. It was always just like, I don't know. Something. Something. Some other thing.

This makes me think about several times growing up in Arizona. It happened on two occasions where I looked down and there was a scorpion on my foot. That happened twice. Okay, well that's f-ed up. One time I was in the shower and I looked down and there was a little baby scorpion on my toe in the shower and I flicked it off. And then the other time

was my mom and I were driving from Arizona to LA to move out here and we were in LA. We've driven six hours and I'm taking some soda up to my apartment and I'm wearing flip flops and I get up to my apartment

and as soon as I'm up there, I look down and there's a full scorpion on my foot and I flick that off and I was like, oh, it rode along with us. What are you, in the mummy? Anyways. This is awful. That's insane.

Anyways, have you thought about... Yeah, go ahead. You could shave your hair on your toe. I was going to say, you could shave it. You could do that. You could do a little wax, which, ouch. Ow, that would hurt. You could also get a real spider and just set it on your toe and look at what it would actually look like.

Absolutely not. And then kind of use that as a frame of reference of like, maybe it wouldn't be the same. He's scared of spiders right then he's gonna have nightmares but psychologically like I could just be like okay not a spider

I know the difference now true exactly or just shave you know could just shave it off yeah you could just shave it off

okay have you ever shaved your toe hair I've trimmed it before okay but it comes back just as scraggly well honey

it will it's like if you wax it it might not come back as scraggly. Well, honey, it will. If you wax it, it might not come back as scraggly. I haven't waxed yet. Wax your toes. Yeah, get a little home one. Yikes. Do a home toe wax.

Do a little home wax just on your front toe. You put the wax on, you put the little thing on, you wait two seconds, then you... Okay. That sounds good to me. Okay. I'm gonna do it. That's what I would do, because you can't be scaring, then you... Okay. All right. That sounds good to me. Okay. I'm going to do it. That's what I would do because you can't be scaring yourself when you're relaxing. No. No, no, no.

Or just wear socks all the time. That's a bummer. That is a bummer. Maybe like little toe socks. Yeah. Little socks for your toes. Yeah. Okay, great.

Well, I'm going to go home and wax and I'm going to report back. Okay. We're sending people to their death right now. Thank you both. Thank you, Amanda. Thank you, Marcus. Good right now Thank you both Good luck That is so funny I can't relate

I've got my blonde hairs all over my body See I have dark Portuguese hair I pull it up It's like oh my god I pull it up You're just like whoa put, put your sleeve down. You need to put that sleeve down. Oh, man.

Our next client, Matt Duran. Duran. Back again. Last one. This is our last client. He's back again. Yes. I remember when he sat on your lap.

Yes. Huge moment for me. I know. That was a real moment. Huge moment for us. I think so. Huge moment for me. I've known That was a real moment. Huge moment for us. I think so. Huge moment for me. I've known you for so many years, and it's like, you know, about time.

I know. I know. Anyway. Update. Update? Update. What? I don't know.

I don't know if there can be an update with your last thing, but okay. Okay. Dad's still dead. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. You know, I don't know what I was expecting. I knew he was going to say that.

There was a part of me that's like, hey, who knows in this world. Dad's still dead. Okay. Update. Update. He is missing. No. Yeah.

No. So after the episode, you know know I was really missing him and I went to go check up on the cemetery website the database and you could search your loved ones and it gives you all the information I have the picture I'm not lying but in the status

section it said plot removed what? yeah so I was wondering if maybe you guys had something to do with it section, it said plot removed. What? Yeah. So I was wondering if maybe you guys had something to do with it. I don't even know your dad's first name. No, no, no, no. I don't know who your dad is. You know my last name. I don't know what

plot you guys are in. He's in. Wait. Sorry. Hold on. Wait a second. Plot missing? Plot removed. Why? Plot removed? Why? Plot removed? They can just do that? I don't know much about... You're acting kind of shocked.

I am shocked. I don't know much about cemeteries or... I'm shocked because you said update, and this really is an update. Yeah. Okay, continue. Still dead. So have you... Probably.

Did you call them or something and and no i didn't call i would i don't like calling people i i relate i relate but i would be calling them be like hey it says his plot was removed what the you haven't checked in no just the website so i can't really check in with you, you know, because he's dead still. Yeah, no, I get that. Wait, so where did the plot get moved to? I don't know. They just said removed?

Removed. Durant, you have to check in. This feels like a check-in thing. I thought it was you guys. Because last time you said on the next full moon you were going to bring him back. Oh, no. Did I say that? You did say that.

Play it back. Yeah, maybe at the full moon we can call him in. I need to stop pulling that witchy shit. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome... No, just kidding. Dad? That would be so... Daddy! The darkest joke we've ever made.

That would be so insane. This is insane. This is is like actually this is a problem this is a real this is a actual real problem that you've come to us for I mean I was feeling hopeful but now I'm wait hopeful because because I thought

it was you guys oh okay so it wasn't us oh no it was it was you guys. Oh, okay. So it wasn't us. Oh. No, it was not us. I think that the cemetery is a piece of shit, and they removed the plot and didn't contact anyone. Yeah, I think you should get there as soon as possible. What?

I didn't know they did this. I guess maybe I figure, I sometimes look at cemeteries, I do have this thought, where I drive past cemeteries, I do have this thought, where I drive past cemeteries and I go, damn, you'd think they'd be full. And how do they, so many people die.

You know what's weird? More people die every year. I'm like, how do they, where do they put it? They're just making room. I had this thought too. I'm like, where are they going to put everybody?

But then I'm like, okay, if they remove them, I'm like, maybe they remove ones that are like 200 years old or something. Is your dad? He's not 200 years old. Okay, well, if they remove them, I'm like, maybe they remove ones that are like 200 years old or something. Is your dad? He's not 200 years old. Okay, well, then it's not that.

I would assume not. That feels way not cool. Did he do, like, did he not pay rent? I don't know. I don't know. He didn't pay his ghost tax. So what, so where is he? We don't know.

I was hoping you guys could figure that out for me, maybe. I feel... You're the advice podcast. I cannot. This is way out of our grasp. Maybe someone in the comments will know. Bring him back. Well, I apologize for saying that.

We're not warlocks. You could have said that. Well, hear me out. That's our bad. I think, I think, I know you don't like calling, but I think you should call.

Uh-huh. You should call this. Pick up the phone. It's hard. I'd rather text. I know, me too, but I don't think funeral homes have a text thing.

Cemeteries. I think you should figure out where he is because it wasn't us. And I said I would bring him back in your memories. Well, maybe we could do that now. Maybe the plot was removed on the website.

Maybe it was a website error. Or maybe, you know. Website error. No. I think you have to call. And I'm gonna do my best to bring him to a place that will be peaceful. Well, what? I don't know.

I'm grasping at straws right now. I'm freaking out. I don't know. I was not expecting this at all. Same. Okay, you know what? Do you want us to call? Could you? I was not expecting this at all. Same. Okay, you know what? Do you want us to call?

Could you? We could call them and say, hey, it says this plot was removed. I'll give you the number to the cemetery. Great, we'll do that. Yeah, you'll call and I'll stand behind you. Why are you afraid of... No, it's fine. It's fine.

We'll call. We'll call them. Thanks, Dad. You got it son Yeah Yeah Alright thanks Duran I'm sorry I messed

Everything up for you So you just promised I promised I'd bring him back And now you promised You'd call and find him I said I'd call I just want to make that clear I'm not

I at least call the The funeral home or wherever And be like hey It says this plot was removed What's the deal That's all home or wherever and be like, hey, it says this plot was removed. What's the deal? That's all. All right. And they'd be like, yeah, it was.

And I'll be like, where is it? Give it to me. And they'd be like, no. And I'd be like, I have a specific set of skills. I will find you. Which are? Well, I'm Liam Neeson. Oh, OK.

Taken five. Yeah, taken five. He was taken. Where's my dad?on. Oh, okay. Taken five? Yeah, taken five. He was taken. Where's my dad? Yeah. That's insane. No, that actually like pisses me off that they just did that. Yeah, also.

Without letting the family know. Any notice. Yeah, I feel like you have to let the family know. That's insane. And plotted where? I have so many questions. I'm going to be up all night. So many questions. I can't believe I promised I'd bring him back. I'm going to be up all night. So many questions.

I can't believe I promised I'd bring him back. I need to stop doing that. I promised to call a funeral home. You promised to bring someone's father back from the dead. I need to stop doing stuff like that. Yeah. I get too invested. Yeah.

And I think I have these other powers. Yeah. Well, I could try. I'm imagining you at a funeral and you're consoling a friend who's lost a loved one. You're like, I'm going to bring him back. I'm going to bring him back. I'm going to bring him back. And they go, you don't need to do that.

You're not helping at all. It's like when I go to a party and meet a friend. I'm like, you should come over for dinner anytime. That's a completely different thing. Well, it's kind of in the same boat. At least one of them is possible. The other one breaks the rules of the universe. I need to stop doing this.

Okay. Wow. Guys, that was us solving, you know, Cass and Cruz. Some problems. Some problems. And we realized these people are incredible, and we did our best, and I think we did a pretty good job. I think so, too. I think we did a pretty good job. I think so too. I think we handled that as best as we could.

Some of these problems are a little too advanced for us. Yeah, a little too advanced but we did our best. And Ian came here and dissed me. I don't think he was asking for help at all. Yeah, I'm so sorry about that. I feel like we started off in such a wild place. Yeah, but it's alright. It's alright. I hope you guys race.

Anyways, in the comments down below, you can give your advice to all of our friends. And... Let us know if you want us to do this again. Yeah. We're always happy to. We're always happy to have clients. Alright. Alright. Goodbye. Goodbye.