Smosh Mouth - S1: #3 - Courtney Opens Up About Her Sexuality

Episode Date: March 6, 2019

Ian, Courtney, and Damien discuss Ian’s bad Instagram game, Lilly Singh’s recent coming out post and Courtney’s own journey with discovering her sexuality, and the best ways to deal with negative comments online. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Everyone's got a pro. Need tires? I've got a pro. Car making a weird sound? I've got a pro. So who's that pro? The pros at Tread Experts. From tires to auto repair, Tread Experts is always there, helping you with Michelin tires you can trust. Until May 30th, receive up to $70 by prepaid MasterCard with purchase of four new Michelin passenger or light truck tires. Find your pro at your local Tread Experts. From tires to auto repair, we're always there. TreadExperts.ca If it's a flat or a squeal, a wobble or peel, your tread's worn down or you need a new wheel, wherever you go, you can get a pro at Tread Experts. Until May 30th, purchase four new Michelin passenger or light truck tires and receive up to $70 by prepaid MasterCard. Conditions apply. Details at Michelin.ca.

Find a Michelin TreadExperts dealer near you at TreadExperts.ca slash locations. From tires to auto repair, we're always there. TreadExperts.ca. If you ever respond to somebody's negativity and they respond back with more negativity, just drop it there because it's not going to get better. The most secure way to say it for me is just being like, oh yeah, I'm not straight. I'm very proud to have learned from my father the things that I want to take or the things that I see like that's not me and that's okay. I remember talking to my barista and she was like like I am really getting into slime. I love slime.

There we go. All right there we go. Hello everyone and welcome to the third ever Smoshcast. I am your host Ian Hecox and who am I joined by today? You got Courtney Miller. And you do have one Damien Haas. We are here. Can I say, the last time it was just us three doing something. Do you remember what it was? No. Wait.

We were at my house watching Xanadu. That was that night after the stupid letter, the first letter went out. Yeah, the first letter of like, we're all going to lose our jobs. And I was like, you guys just come over and we'll hang out. Like, we don't need to be alone right now. Yep. I brought a bottle of wine that I found that had this apocalyptic sort of setting on the bottle. Yeah, it looks fire.

City in flames. I was like, this is very appropriate right now. I still have that bottle. It's on display next to my microwave. She's made a shrine. I forced you. Well, you were willing, but I made you eat that bottle. It's on display next to my microwave. She's made a shrine. I forced you. Well, you were willing, but I made you eat that pizza. That's my favorite pizza.

Yeah, I was going to say, it's the first time I've ever seen your horrific choice in pizza where every Italian grandmother rolls over constantly in her grave. Listen, I got you wings. So you can. Appreciate it. All right. Thanks for the wings. They're the wing-a-lings.

Yeah, but I made you guys watch a childhood favorite movie of mine. Xanadu. Starring Olivia Newton-John. So good. It was, well. It was weird, actually. It was bad. Yeah, let's just put it out there.

Xanadu, not a good movie. Flippin' garbage. As I watched with you guys, I realized more and more how bad it was. It's very much like The Room. And for people listening, if you've seen The Room, you would understand. Well, the bad ADR, the awkwardly slow dialogue and storyline. It was like everybody's first movie. Like the director, everybody.

But the music is incredible. Electric Light Orchestra, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That was good. There's one moment where I think the movie's going to get really good. Yeah. Like it turns into this whole Orchestra. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. That was good. There's one moment where I think the movie's going to get really good. Yeah. Like it turns into this whole animation. Yeah.

And it's super 70s. I was like, all right, I can get with this. It was Don whoever his name is that did all the fish for Disney and stuff too. That was like, it was legit animation. Yeah. Sorry. Don Juan. Don Juan.

That's it. And then after that, we watched a bunch of YouTube videos about cursed images. We were laughing so hard. I feel like that's it. And then after that, we watched a bunch of YouTube videos about cursed images. We were laughing so hard. I feel like that's how every party ends now. It's like everyone's partying, and then it gets to that part of the night where they're like, okay, let's just put on YouTube and show each other weird videos. Only the real ones have stayed for that end of the party. Yeah.

Totally. We were watching weird videos. And it's that awkward moment where the videos get worse and worse. Yes. And people slowly start to trickle out. They're like, I'm going home. And there's so much pressure too because you're sharing something and you're like, this is the funniest

thing. And you just do that thing where you keep turning to your friend and being like, they're going to laugh at this part and then they don't. And you're like, the party's over and it's my fault. And I find that the videos that I tend to recommend are really messed up. And I enjoy them, but everyone else thinks that I have a serious problem. Death compilation.

Yeah. Well, there is a short film that I like to show people during Christmas time. It's called Treevenge. And it's about Christmas trees that they're sentient. As all are. Yeah. And they see all their brethren being cut down. So they eventually decide to take revenge.

And it's extremely gory. Like you do. Like branches going through people's heads. Oh my goodness. Wow. And it's very detailed. Is it live action? Yes.

Wait, what? Yeah. Oh, I was joking. Are you serious? When was this made? Please tell me 2008. That's the perfect time for a movie like that. Probably around there.

Oh, my God, yes. It's a short film. You could catch it on YouTube. Oh, please, yes. That was a fun night, though. It's violence warning. But yeah, Xanadu, it's a bad movie. I would not recommend it.

I'm just glad you guys watched it with me. Next up, Grease 2. We will watch it together. Another movie I'm weirdly obsessed with that's kind of bad, but actually it's very bad. But half the experience, the reason it was fun was because we got to watch it with you. Because even if it's objectively a terrible movie, and it is a terrible movie, getting to watch it with someone who loves it so much is like, all right, I want to watch this through your filter.

It's like watching wrestling with Matt Robb. Wrestling's not my thing, but but he loves wrestling so I'm like alright show me why let me see why I love exposing my friends to things that I love like so much yeah I went to

a UFC fight with the Sohinky Brothers okay and you know I don't normally enjoy seeing people get punched in the face

but sure when you can watch it with somebody that's excited about it and knows what's going on, then you're like, all right, okay, I can get with this person bleeding profusely

from their head. I can't watch fights. I don't like it. It's too much anxiety. Same, but maybe if I was with the brothers to hinky, maybe it'd be different. That's true. One of the things that you showed me, Courtney,

on YouTube during one of our big party nights where we were just flipping through YouTube was several music videos by the artist known as Oliver Tree. Yes, that is true. His music videos are so sick. He's awesome. Star of Treevenge. Yeah.

Oh, I didn't even think of that connection. We're just talking. Welcome to Tree Talk. Welcome to Tree Talk. Today, conifers next week i love deciduous trees it's jennifer conifer and chris pine okay stop i will not stop but oliver tree uh his music videos are so cool and i gotta love a man that has a bowl cut yes and he's crushing it he makes it and like honestly if you did it if you went back to the

bowl cut did it the way he's doing it it's it feels like he's crushing it. He makes it, and, like, honestly, if you did it, if you went back to the bowl cut and did it the way he's doing it, it feels like he's bringing it back. Like, he makes it look very trendy because it has, like, the fade, but then into the bowl cut. For people who don't know who Oliver Tree is, I strongly recommend you check him out. He's blowing up this year. Like, it's happening for him finally.

That's a threat? And his music videos, it is a threat. I will hurt you. He's blowing up this year. He's blowing up right now. He's so threat? His music videos, it is a threat. I will hurt you. He's blowing up this year. He's blowing up right now. He's so creative and so funny. Like, he has that 90s purple and green

cup pattern, like, in an entire sweatsuit, and it's on a monster truck and a motorcycle. He's so cool. He's so awesome. He also does scooter tricks. Yeah, he's a professional scooter raiser, scooter trickster. Scootist. He's a scootist. Yeah, he's a professional scooter raiser, scooter trickster. Scootist.

He's a scootist. Yeah, I recently went to his show, and I had, like, my whole family went. My whole family's obsessed with him. That was the night that you showed them your butt trick. Yes, yes, that is that same famous night of the butt. Yeah, I actually got merch from that show that night, which is funny because he recently reached out to me out of nowhere. No way.

Dude, it was so crazy. No way. So listen. Listening. So I was about to boomerang my pasta, right, for Instagram. As one does. You know. Everybody over the age of 40 just turned out right now.

Like, I don't know what that means. Were you cooking this pasta? Yeah. Okay, so. It was mid-cook. So you gotta prove that you were adulting. Yeah. I get that.

You know, you gotta do that sometimes. Yeah, for sure. So I had opened up the camera, and it was selfie, obviously, when it surprises you on selfie mode. What are you gonna hate on my half hands? For sure. And right then,

it shows the notification up top, and it was like, Oliver Tree, and it was like, love your sweatshirt. And I just screen capped, do you see, I have the video

like this screen cap of my face in Instagram story camera and the message up top of me just freaking out please post that the day this goes up yeah I will

I will he apparently I don't even know how he saw because on Instagram first of all he follows zero people but on the Smosh

Instagram story we posted those photos where we were like freaking out getting ready for the announcement and you could just barely see that I was wearing the sweatshirt

I got from his show in the corner and like then I went on my story and posted a bunch of pictures where you could just barely see the sweatshirt and he somehow saw it

and like we messaged for a little bit I told him about my family's obsessed with him some people are at Smosh obsessed with him you get them digis? no but we can go to Digimar? I can go to shows now like he's like messaged for a little bit. I told him about my family's obsessed with him. Some people are at Smosh who are obsessed with him. You get them digis? No.

But we can go to... Digimar? I can go to shows now. He's like, yeah, dude, come to my shows. For sure, you'll be on the guest list,

whatever. That's sick. And then we talk about Vine and how cool it used to be. He's such a cool dude. He probably has a secondary account that he uses to follow people more casually.

Oh, yeah. So it's not like, oh my God, Oliver Tree follows me. And then when he sees that, he switches over to, you know, the name account. That's smart. Yeah. That is very smart.

Thanks, dog. Following zero people on Instagram, though, it's like, damn, what? That's a hardcore flex. Yeah. He doesn't have to if he's got that secondary account. I mean, I don't know. Yeah, it's true. But I'm just saying.

No, he 100% has to have a second account. I am very selective with who I follow. Like, I have- You still don't follow me. I don't? No, I'm kidding. No, okay. Generally, a lot of my friends I don't follow

because I just don't have an interest. Yeah. Or I don't like the photos or whatever. Like, I'm a very bad Instagrammer as a poster and a user because I'll just kind of scroll through. I don't really comment on people's things. I don't like a lot of things unless it's likable. I posted a picture with you the other day.

I think you liked that and commented on that, so thank you. Well, it was a very nice photo. I tagged your taint. That's right. I was in the photo. That's why. I got to say, I feel like as an influencer, God, that sounds so dumb to say. Do we have a barf bucket?

Can you add some more vocal fry when you say that? Influencer. But seriously, like, because when I, I mean, I definitely have people that I like still follow from high school. I'm definitely like at a point in my life where I'm starting to like unfollow people from my past. Because like they're posting way too much. And I'm just don't even talk anymore and you are just you're better than them I'm just better than them and I don't I'm above them now I don't need them anymore but like when I see other influencers posting branded stuff or just in general like they I feel like it's it's a good relationship for people who are influencers on Instagram and stuff.

It's like to keep that relationship of interaction and stuff because it really does help each other. Yeah. It's on Vine. Revine for Revine. Remember that crap? That was garbage. That was bad. But I think it's healthy to be interactive with people on social media.

Yeah, I don't play those games. I know. Man doesn't play games games. I know. Man doesn't play games. Me as well. You should just follow zero people. This dude got in on the ground floor of YouTube and built a flippin' empire.

Do you think you even have what it takes to look him in the eyes? It was purely based off of sub4sub. All 24 million, or however many subscribers we have, are all sub4sub. You know, I watched you guys when you first started, by the way. Really? Yeah, I remember like Boxman. I watched you guys when you first started, by the way. Really? Yeah.

I remember, like, Boxman. I watched the Pokemon song and all that stuff. I remember the food battles. And I, you know, tapered off for, like, a long time, and then it just sort of came full circle. Get out? Well, no. I have a contract. I'm afraid you're stuck with me. I watched a lot of Smosh in middle school.

And, like, I remember my best friend Marissa, who I was still, like, close friends with, we would watch Smosh videos together school and like I remember my best friend Marissa who I was still like close friends with we would watch Smosh videos together on my sister's laptop after school and I remember I had this guilty thing that I would sometimes not even watch the sketches I would only watch the behind the scenes cause that was like my favorite

to watch which is why I love when we still put out behind the scenes stuff occasionally which I wish we could just do more of but definitely watched let's put out more BTS scenes stuff occasionally, which I wish we could just do more of, but definitely watched a lot of that. Let's put out more BTS stuff, but like the K-pop group. Yes. I feel like that's the problem when you say BTS now, because to us it just means behind the scenes,

but now, you know, the internet. It'll just be us Photoshopping ourselves into photos of BTS or learning the dances. Like, comment, and subscribe if you want to. This is your first time on the podcast. It is. It's going to be a lot of people's first times in episodes to come, but this is my second time. I haven't been in every episode, but whatever.

I feel like I botched it so far. You're so experienced. Have you done podcasts before? So while we were sort of in that break time between Defy, Shane and I batted around the idea of starting our own. We actually recorded a few episodes. But then when we learned that we were potentially coming back with Mythical and that there would be a podcast involved, we both just sort of thought it was best to like, you know, not start it at the same time Smosh was going to start theirs, especially if me and him talking would be a draw for this one.

It was just sort of like let's not play a homie like that. You have episodes of podcasts recorded right? The lost episodes. But I don't know like two white guys on a podcast I don't think that's been done before. The world is not ready. Groundbreaking. We just want to I even make that joke where

it's just like hey let's talk about the podcast really loudly in a coffee shop. Let's make sure everyone knows. Oh, my God. And they're like, what? It's not even released anywhere? I have to be a part of this. So what else were you doing during the downtime?

Yeah. Well, I'd say I had a week or two where I just let myself chill, decompress, really get my bearings. You know what? I didn't cry, which I'm super down for crying. Crying is great. But I did not get to a super low place, which was cool. So you just don't care then? No, it's all about the Benjamins dog.

So I had a friend from New York reach out who is a producer of gaming content and also knows a lot of people who did Twitch, helped people get started. So he reached out and was like, dude, I heard about the Defy thing. You would be so good on Twitch. I will help you in whatever way you need. We'll talk about specs and stuff like that. And so within a couple of weeks,

I was up and running on Twitch. And I've got to say, it was, it flippin' saved my life. Not only because, you know, obviously there's a financial aspect to it, but it gave me a focus. It gave me something to do that I really legitimately cared about that was my own for the first time. I always come into other people

things. This was the first time I had my thing in the community that we built together there. It's just so flippin' awesome. I got to make it exactly how I wanted it. You can curse in this. I mean, I still still that's my brand I say flippin

also damn every time you say flippin I'm just gonna say fuck everyone's got a pro need tires? I've got a pro

car making a weird sound? I've got a pro so who's that pro? the pros at Tread Experts from tires to auto repair Tread Experts is always there helping you with Michelin tires you can trust. Until May 30th, receive up to $70 by prepaid MasterCard

with purchase of four new Michelin passenger or light truck tires. Find your pro at your local Tread Experts. From tires to auto repair, we're always there. TreadExperts.ca Discover the exciting action of BetMGM Casino. Check out a wide variety of table games with a live dealer or enjoy over 3,000 games to choose from like Cash Eruption, UFC Gold Blitz. Make instant deposits or same-day withdrawals.

Download the BetMGM Ontario app today. Visit BetMGM.com for terms and conditions. 19 plus to wager Ontario only. Please gamble responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. The audience just heard a seagull.

I will just say, though, I will say I peeped a couple of your streams, and it's like I watch Twitch sometimes, and my brother does Twitch as well, but when I started watching Damien, it seems like he's, you nail it. You're so good with playing the game and interacting with the chat. It's like you have two sets of eyes and you're so fast at interacting with them,

seeing what they're saying, not just being like, nice dude, keep going. Like you literally like, oh that's a cool thing to say. Yeah, I have this thing to say too. Also, oh, just killed five people, cool. Like, you're, I was blown away when I first saw it. I was so impressed. That means a hell of a lot, Courtney. Thank you. And I like, oh, that's a cool thing to say. Yeah, I have this thing to say too. Also, oh, just killed five people. Cool. I was blown away when I first saw it. I was so impressed. That means a hell of a lot, Courtney. Thank you. Like everybody, I struggle with self-confidence.

So the fact that my friends have been so supportive, you saying that, it means a hell of a lot. And the community, I want to say thank you to my community as well. You can't talk to them. I have to. This is the Smosh cast, not the Damien String cast. I have to. Just because the Smosh cast, not the Damien streaming cast. I have to.

Just because, I don't know, I'm big on like, you know, the internet can be a toxic place. I want this to be a space where people can just sort of be who they are, you know, say what they want to say, you know, and be comfortable with that and know that they're not going to be judged. And everybody was like super on board with that. And the fact that we've kept growing but that vibe has stayed the same, it really speaks to not me necessarily but the community itself and how we've just gotten such

a solid cool group of people so i'm just i'm happy and everybody here has been awesome about you know allowing me to continue that um you know i'm moving specifically so i can be closer to work so i can get home and stream when the time comes so um anyway blah blah blah me me me but like it was just it It is interesting. It's been a lot of fun. You did hit on an interesting thing with your community being really positive. Yeah, you set that precedent.

Because with Twitch, the chat can a lot of times turn very toxic very quickly, very easily for a lot of users. Because it kind of becomes an attention thing. When you get a large view base, and how many people are watching your streams? Depending on the game, it goes up to 400, hovers around 250 often.

Incredible. Thank you. That's 400 people that can all have the opportunity to say the same thing at the same time. So it's a competition for words. So a lot of times, like people will feel the need to say something toxic or something controversial

just to get the attention. Yeah. I'm just more or less open about it because you still have to appeal to people's humanity because even if they're trolling, like that's there. So, you know,

sometimes if, you know, the mods don't catch something and the community's seeing something off, I'll just be like, hey man, I get what you're doing. That's not really what we do here. I'd love to have you join and hang out with us. You seem like a cool dude.

But if that's what you want to do, there's a different space for that, and that's fine. And people have actually been receptive. I've had people be like, hey, you know what? I'm really sorry. I actually just wanted to see if I could get you to see this, but this seems fun. I'd like to hang out. And they become a regular part of the stream. That is a strange thing. see if I could get you to see this, but this seems fun. I'd like to hang out. And they become a regular part of the stream. And, you know.

That is a strange thing. A lot of times you can actually turn the negative people. People are people, man. Yeah. Yeah. Because I have a friend that, you know, whenever she gets a negative comment on something, she'll respond to them in a positive way.

And a lot of times they'll be like, okay, I'm so sorry. I'm actually a fan. It's like, well, then why were you being a dick to me just a second ago? Because people just want that interaction no matter how they can get it. And it's like, I think we're all aware of that.

And I think if you, it's when you let your emotions get the better of you that it turns into something bigger. Then they see that response. They're like, oh, I can get more. And so, you know, and at the end of the day, if I have to ban someone, it's just click and. Yeah.

But. I definitely had my fair share of times when I did it a few times where someone said something like ridiculously mean or like untrue. And I'd be like, you definitely want to be positive. I'd be like, hey, man, I don't know why you think that, but I actually really enjoy whatever. And usually it is like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I love you. I did not mean to offend you or I was just trying to talk.

Like that's all it really is a lot of times. That happens a lot on the Internet and social media. We have this mask a lot of times that we feel like we can say whatever we want because we expect people don't. It's easy to dehumanize somebody and not think of them as a person when they're not in the room with you. On both sides of things. Yeah. So when you like suddenly break down that wall of like, well, hey, like these are my feelings and like you have feelings.

So what's up? And then it's automatically it's like, oh, like that humanity is still totally there. For sure. And I mean, it's something that I've dealt with, you know, for 13 years now. Yeah. Maybe that explains why I'm so just, because nowadays like things don't really affect me as much.

I feel like maybe that's somehow like emotionally dulled me throughout the years. But I think that's natural. Yeah. How could it not? But there's still like, there's somehow emotionally dulled me throughout the years. But I think that's natural. Yeah. How could it not? But there's still comments sometimes that come through, and they still get you. Yeah. The way that I like to compare it to is like, it's like being a YouTuber, being like an online personality, is like being a boxer.

You know? You get better at not getting punched. The more you do it, you learn certain tricks. You learn how to bob and weave. You learn how to take a hit, like you said. But every now and then, you're still going to get punched in the fucking face. Yep, yep, yep.

So, you know, it's... I don't know what... There's no one solution to it. Yeah. But it's really, you do have to come at it with a compassionate angle, like you said, with understanding, like, they don't really know what's going on either. I was just saying, I know I've said things that, like,

sometimes I know maybe I don't mean or, like, I was mean or that I meant for it to sound, like, you know what I mean? So, like, knowing that I make those same mistakes, you can only assume, like, oh, yeah, that person I'm sure is not like I was mean or that I meant for it to sound like, you know what I mean? So like knowing that I make those same mistakes, you can only assume like, oh yeah, that person, I'm sure is not like to their core poison. Is it, is it tough for you? Um, sometimes feeling like you've had a little bit of emotional dulling for how long you've been doing this, but also still feeling like you obviously recognize, like you want to connect to someone's humanity. You still want to be vulnerable and be able to do that.

I mean, do you feel like it's tough for you to go about it from that other side of things now? Or do you feel like you've struck a balance as a long-term YouTubist? A lot of times I just have to ignore the comments. Sure. You know, you get that instant feeling like I have to respond to this or I have to react to this.

And, you know, I've just developed a routine of just being like, no, this isn't going to benefit me to respond to this. I'm going to scroll through this comment and see another comment and forget about that thing in like five seconds. And that generally goes with social media in general, like not just reading comments against you, but reading an article or something political that might piss you off.

What I like to do is say, you can call it a five minute rule or a 10 minute rule. If you feel like saying something, maybe just kind of save it, revisit it in 10 minutes, see if you still actually care. That's a great because a lot of people they'll just they'll just react instantly and that's that's the issue with Twitter and that's why you get that a lot of the outrage stuff is because on impulse yeah because you're

able to immediately respond it's your very first reaction to something rather than taking a step back asking yourself yourself, does this really matter to me? Does this affect me? And, and how is this going to make me or anything else better by me weighing in on this? Yeah. And responding usually like it, I mean, unless it goes in it really well, like we said earlier, it's like, oh, no, this is totally misunderstanding. But sometimes if you respond and it becomes like this back and forth argument, then you're going to feel that stewing anger and upsetness for like 10 times as long. You don't want to put that energy. It's the thing you think about in the shower. Yeah, you don't want to.

You're like having an imaginary fight. Don't dwell because then that comment wins and you don't. Like don't dwell on anything negative negative especially when people say negative stuff it's it's usually not like solely because of that negative thing it's like they usually something else is going on or like the people those negative comments are so rare too when someone is like cool with a video they usually will barely even hit like they'll just be like cool and just move on not comment anything right not like sometimes not even hit subscribe but they'll just be like, cool, and just move on. Not comment anything. Right. That's what I do. Not hit like. Sometimes not even hit subscribe, but you guys should. You have, and you guys are great.

Good plug. Watching. But yeah, like it's a lot of times the negative ones stick out because the positive ones are up in those positive people's minds. I think you touched on something really cool there. It's sort of about how much power you're giving to that comment or whatever the influence is. And it's like, does one comment at the end of the day really affect you that much? No. But if you're still thinking about it, the question is, what do you feel about what they

said? Do you feel like they're right? Did they hit the thing that you don't like about you? Well, that's something that's in your power to change. So screw that comment, screw that person. How are you going to work on yourself to make this not a thing anymore? Or if you don't care something that's in your power to change. So screw that comment. Screw that person. How are you going to work on yourself to make this not a thing anymore? Or if you don't care so much, if they said a thing and you're like, yeah, I'm loud sometimes. Oh, well, like that's where the work is to be done. Not through an argument online. Or just respond, fuck you.

I'm out. Yeah, right. And that's all. Cussing a swear. Oh, my gosh. I'm not used to that. Cussing a swear. I will say it's very rare, but it sort of restores your faith in humanity when you see a 10 response argument going on in my Twitter. About you, is it? No, no, no.

Just an argument. Oh, okay. Just like an argument on Twitter or YouTube comments. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then at the end, it resolves. Yes. And they actually come to some sort of resolution. You're like, oh my God, there is faith in humanity.

But most of the time it's garbage and nobody's happy at the end. Yeah, no one wins. I would say like if you ever respond to somebody's negativity and they respond back with more negativity, just drop it there. Because it's not going to be,

it's not going to get better. Whatever you're looking for, you ain't going to find it. You, it's not going to get better. Whatever you're looking for, you ain't going to find it. You're not going to reach that catharsis that you're looking for and you're not going to solve the problem.

Oh, you win. I am, you are the victor. You've changed my mind on politics, religion, and everything. In one comment. Oh, you are right.

The shamrock shake is the best. Well, who doesn't believe that? I'll fight him. I've never had it. I haven't either, but I just want to be accepted. It's okay.

It's okay? Okay, let's battle. It's a very distinct taste. What is it? Better than McFlurry? Fresh mint chip, right? Shamrock? It's our McDonald's, every McDonald's ever.

What flavor is the Shamrock shake? Shamrock flavor. Shamrock. Yeah. I would actually be down for like wheatgrass flavored milkshake. What? Wheatgrass and milk? Damien, you can get out.

Take those headphones off. I mean, how's that different from a green tea frap? I think green tea fraps taste like fish and grass. I've never tried that. No, they're nasty. Excuse me, it's matcha? Oh, I'm sorry, mocha. Go away, please. Go away.

You've got me for 35 more minutes or however long actually on the on the angle I don't know gosh this is just

too much negativity but the whole Captain Marvel trolls kind of thing Rotten Tomatoes had to

adjust the way that people can leave reviews before the movie came out because, you know, it's a superhero movie starring a woman. Oh, God forbid. I guess, you know, there's a group of people that aren't fans of that, so they decided to bomb Rotten Tomatoes with a bunch of negative comments. Nice. And that happened before with Black Panther as well. Before the movie even came out. bomb Rotten Tomatoes with a bunch of negative comments.

And that happened before with Black Panther as well. Before the movie even came out. It's so... I don't know, man. I hear there's cats in that movie, though. Whoa, love them. Like, the cats, there's like a star in the movie. Oh, yeah, I've seen the trailer. Oh, that's Sabrina the Teenage.

I usually try... I usually try, I like to avoid trailers, especially for Marvel movies. I agree. At all costs. I love being surprised. You can actually watch. I think you can watch a Marvel trailer and be okay because they actually put misleading things in the trailers that don't actually happen in the movie for that explicit reason. They'll put different takes of delivery for acting.

And some, yeah, I've seen that. Some scenes aren't even in there. They'll change props. I know there was something with like a captain America's suit or shield or something in the infinity war trailer. That's different.

Uh, can you imagine doing a whole day of takes? You're exhausted. They're like, all right, now let's get some for the trailer. And you're like, come on.

Yeah. Do you think they, they probably don't know they don't even know I wonder I bet there's some places where they will write out a trailer based on the script and like strategically make certain expositions

I mean trailers are so well made now like I enjoy there's some movies where I enjoy the trailer more than I enjoyed the movie or some trailers you see an entire movie yeah oh my god the dogs way home or whatever dude aka homeward bound

aka the worst CG mountain lion I've ever seen in my life that was the weirdest thing I just got chills that was such a weird thing to see in the trailer I remember hearing people we saw it together when we were watching Into the Spider-Verse yes I just remember hearing as... We saw it together when we were watching Into the Spider-Verse. Yes.

I just remember hearing, as we see this dog rub faces with a mountain lion, I just hear Shane going, what's going on? It's a very Shane thing. They literally, unless a bunch of stuff happens after that, it seems like they showed the entire movie. I hope to God that's the first 10 minutes, and it takes a weird left turn with serial killers, Mad Max style.

That's what I was wondering. Yeah. You know, I saw Guardians, didn't see a single trailer for it. Wow. And also didn't know it was a Marvel movie. Didn't know they were part of the Avengers. Like after seeing it, I was like,

that movie was amazing, changed my life. And they're like, you know, they're in the Avengers. And I was like, oh. Wow, fake fan. I know, I know. Do you even know Chris Pratt? Another crazy thing that the Marvel movies do with the secrecy and everything is the actors don't even really get the scripts.

Well, they have to do that now. Yeah, they put them in a room. And they're allowed to read the script there, but they can't take it back with them. And a lot of times the things that are written in the script aren't even actually going to be in the movie. It's more misleading things just in case of leaks. Yeah, well, because Tom Holland and Mark Ruffalo were really bad at leaks and stuff. Now they're using that as a marketing thing. They have Tom Holland giving all these like, oh, spoiler leaks. Mark Ruffalo were really bad at leaks and stuff. Now they're using that as a marketing thing.

They have Tom Holland giving all these, like, ooh, spoiler leaks, but now it's just a marketing thing. But how as an actor are you even supposed to do your job if you're getting background information and it's like, psych, he didn't even have an uncle, and you're like, but I built my whole emotional ride off of that. Wasn't that the deal with the dude that played Vision? He didn't know that his character He was Jarvis for a long time.

Yeah, but I think he didn't know that his character died until he was getting to set to shoot it. Oh my god. If you're talking about actors that deserve respect for memorizing things, soap opera actors oh yeah

like we all we all dump on soap operas because they're garbage but they have to memorize like 40 pages of script in a morning yeah i was almost on a soap opera once it was down to me and like two other people for i think it was days of our lives i was some characters long lost son of course that comes back. Amazing. Yeah. See, I'm not that good of an actor, so soap operas

would have been perfect. But it's like, because they shoot like an hour long show every single day, like every single weekday, right? Like a new episode

comes out every single weekday, right? Something like that? Yeah. So they have to be shooting an entire television show every single day they're like here's a script wow it's insane so i got massive respect for for that art form but i i

also just couldn't never watch i could never watch it did this they're still on right oh yeah jane the virgin gives you a little taste of like roughly what it's like but back on what you said jamie and you are a great actor. Oh, thank you. You impressed me a lot. Sorry, I'm just going to, I actually want to know because it's so cool because with this new chapter

we're putting you in a lot more of Smosh Pit and sketches and stuff. I'm very excited. But what was that like being from a voice actor and an actor? You were on Disney. I don't know if you did Nickelodeon stuff, but you've done a lot of cool video game stuff

that I don't know if I'm allowed to talk about, but like, what is that like going, well, I guess you voiced for video game stuff, that's the transition, but now you're like, you got into gaming. Like, what was that transition like? Well, thank you so much. That's super nice, all of it, thank you.

I'll just take the damn compliment because I'm not good at that. So I'll just say thank you and I appreciate it. You know, it was a really cool transition, to be honest. I think there are weirder transitions to be made because on Disney, I had a sketch background because I was on So Random with Shane. So that was like the all that of our generation. And so I had a sketch background, but my hobby was always gaming and not only just like

playing games, but looking at the design of them, being like, see how they use lighting here to sort of guide you to this area. And you feel like you're in an open world, but in reality, they're funneling you into the, you know, and I talked to Shane about that when we were roommates, he'd be like, oh yeah, sick, cool. So it just sort of felt, it felt natural. It felt like the next logical step to combine all of my passions. And it was like, this is literally the only place where that could have happened. I can do sketch on one side of things and then gaming on the other. So, you know, the transition wasn't too hard.

If anything, the gaming side was a bit more of a difficult transition for me because it took me a little bit to learn. Like, you're not trying to impress anybody playing games you're not trying to beat everybody else and be the best and all that stuff you are trying to be an entertainer and have fun with it which you know I would do anyway but like there was there's this whole casting process where with other two other people I was playing like Mario Kart and I was like making jokes and stuff but it was still very important in my mind I was just like I probably have to beat these other two people to like be on this gaming channel and I'm garbage at Mario Kart.

So I was like very focused and it was kind of like a sigh of relief to be like, oh, I don't have to go home and like practice the game first. I don't have to buy it and be like, got to make sure I know all the techniques and arms so I can, you know. Well, I think that's, I think that's the thing that separates Smosh Games from the other sort of gaming channels is that it's never about winning. It's just about having fun with your friends. Yeah. And that's something that I think really resonates with people.

And, you know, we're just trying to provide a place for people to feel like they're sort of a part of it. I feel that. And I mean, like, competitive gaming is such a different thing. Yeah. And a lot of people that, you know, when we were trying to figure out, you know, what was going to happen with Smosh and Smosh Games, a lot of people that were thinking about buying Smosh when talking about Smosh Games are like,

so eSports. Oh, no. And we're like, uh. Wrong tree, Chipper. No. It's not. That's not Smosh games. Not at all.

Yes, eSports is big. Yes, people are doing eSports. But guess what? Leave that to the people that are good at doing eSports. Yeah. Let us just be dumbasses on Mario Kart. Exactly. I don't want to learn

all the different nuances. Like, I've never played League of Legends. Looks like fun, but if I ever sat down, I'd want to be able to just like enjoy it. But the friends I know

who play it are like, all right, so this is this character. He does this and this. You have to stay right here and click on this thing at this exact time. And if you don't do it

as soon as you possibly can, it's just like, oh, I thought this was a game. Yeah. My mistake. No, League is not to be messed around with. it's for professionals dog it's so true what you said though about like this job is like weirdly so perfect yeah for a specific interest like like I made a tweet right around the announce and it's like I I

weirdly feel like I was born for this job like I enjoy doing character I just always enjoyed doing weird characters and acting. I love just playing games with my friends. And I was very into YouTube when I was younger. This is everything that I ever wanted to do compiled into one. And it's so crazy that it exists. Well, little do you know, you were born to do this job. We crafted you.

I contacted your parents when I was eight or something, six. And I was like, you need to breed this child. Check her with the YouTube gene. Because I knew what YouTube would be back then. We all did. Everybody knew. Of course. But isn't that, is it interesting for you to know that Courtney and I watched Smosh,

like we knew who you were way back in the day when you were doing the Pokemon theme song stuff. It's a little weird. Yeah, and now you have made this empire that employs all these flippin' people. It's fuckin' people. Sorry, I just had to do it, you said flip. Sorry, I'm sorry. That's fuck people. Sorry, I just had to do it. You said flip. Sorry.

I'm sorry. That's really true, though. You were saying something really nice, and I just had to cock it up. No, see what I mean? I also, I have a hard time taking compliments. But it's just, I'm sure it's very odd. Like, you know, butterfly effect style thing. What if you and Anthony had a fight when you were 12, and you're like, oh, I'm taking

my battle bots home. Yeah. Like, I don't know. Luckily, we did not take BattleBots home. Yeah. Like, I don't know. Luckily, we did not take those BattleBots home. Good. We played and played and played. It just feels so perfect, though. Yeah.

And when we shoot those, when we had a lot of those Smosh Bit videos where we're playing card games and stuff together, a lot of times, because some days we're tired and it was like we just want to go home when we're done, but a lot of times I was just, I was so excited those days because I was genuinely just like having fun with my friends. And like sometimes they'd cut and be like, OK, the game's over.

Even on board AF, stuff like that. I'm just like, I'm just like, I want to keep playing with you guys. Like I really am having so much fun. But that's when you know you're doing the right thing. Totally. Is when you're doing something that you actually want to do. And that's something that, you know, it's been preached since the beginning of YouTube, essentially, you know,

find some, do something that you're passionate about. Don't just do it because it's trending right now or it's popular because it will wear on you. And, um, I mean, maybe some of those people doing slime videos really love slime. I remember talking to my barista and she was like, I am really getting into slime. I love slime. How did that come up? You said venti with hazelnut and she was like, I like slime. Excuse me. I don't.

Come on. You think Starbucks is my go-to coffee place? We live in. There's a coffee shop on every freaking corner of every block in LA. Wait, what? Ian is very personable. I'm a little bit of a coffee snob. Well, it's also not even that. It's like the whole conversation thing. Like, I don't even know how you got into a conversation about slime with a barista, but it wouldn't surprise me though. Because I remember when I first started, I took to you so quick and I told you everything about me,

like bad stuff, good stuff, because you're just so easy to talk to and like just talk about random stuff. Like that's, I think that's why the podcast is perfect for you. But like also like I loved you immediately just because you were so great to talk to. So wait, you're very charismatic, but you feel emotionally dulled, but people can just open up to you.

Have you considered that you might be a psychopath? Like blank canvas situation. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's possible. I see myself in your eyes. You know, I don't think I'm a sociopath. I learned that from Shane Dawson's video.

That's neat. I love Shane Dawson, by the way. I don't think I'm particularly a charismatic person. I always admire charismatic people because I want to understand how they're able to be that way. Do you know what I mean? Like my dad is like a people person. Just a charmer. He just, yeah.

Have you ever met my dad? I don't think so. Maybe for like a brief moment. Paul Rudd, right? I met your mom. But it's like I, you know, growing up, I'm like, I'm like, I want to be like that, like where you can easily just like strike up conversations with people. And for me, that was always, that was always a little harder. I was

always a little bit more reserved, but I'm always trying to push myself because I feel like when you, when you label yourself a certain way that prevents you from changing any sort of bad habits you might have. But to that end, I don't think whatever someone's goal is for themselves personally, I don't ever think you look in the mirror and go, ah, I'm there. I've made it. So, you know, you look up to your dad as being a charismatic person. I look up to my dad and very much in the same way.

But eventually you become that and there's never going to be a day when you're like, yes, I'm charismatic like my father. But it's in your own way. You are in a social media based business when you're like, yes, I'm charismatic like my father. But it's in your own way. You are in a social media based business where you're working with people being funny on camera and you're able to have people open up to you like that. Maybe you have become that. Right. Maybe.

You've become your father. But then sometimes, sometimes I'll have a conversation with somebody and they'll say something to me. I don't have an immediate response because I'm trying to think of something clever to say. Yeah, you do that. And so I'll just something to me. I don't have an immediate response because I'm trying to think of something clever to say. Yeah, you do that. And so I'll just stare at them. You do like this beard touch. Or you'll stare or do like a beard touch and be like, like not knowing what to say right away. But it's like you're a good listener too. You're a really good listener.

Or maybe just not even paying attention to what I'm saying. So that's fine too. Yeah, Courtney and birds are great. You and I have also had a lot of good deep conversations. Maybe it's you, Courtney. Maybe you're able to connect with other people. Maybe you're the one. I'm very overly comfortable with people.

I will say, when I first met you, I do have this thing with when any friend of a close friend of mine, I will take to you immediately too. I'm like, so Shane's best friend's coming to work with us? Amazing, I definitely gold retrievered you. I'm like, hi, hello, give you the biggest hug of the world. I remember our first hug, it was really cute. Was it on Super Stupid Sleepover? No, I think it was in the office,

but it was just somewhere in the office. But I definitely, that was in that stage where I was starting to realize, oh yeah, I like I'm going to be overly friendly to people. Some people may not like that, but like you were, you accepted me right away. It was nice. It's weird coming in and being the new guy and also like having, you know, my best friend was, you know, opening the door for me. But at the same time, like when your best friend is someone that everybody already loves

in the office, it's just like, oh man. And I'm being introduced as like, this is Shane's best friend. It's like, I'm funny. I'll show you. Like there's a lot to live up to, I guess. But not only did you live up to it, but we realized Shane took a lot of your jokes. No, no, no.

A little bit. Just a little bit. Or maybe they were just inside jokes with you guys either way, but. You, I think you nailed it perfectly, Courtney. You are a golden retriever yeah because you yeah every person you you want to be friends with and some and some people you probably give too much of the benefit of the doubt oh yeah and you give them too many breaks but but that is just

who you are um and it's a lot better than being a dick to everybody true like wanting wanting to be friends with everyone is much better than not wanting to be friends with anyone. I'll take that any day. My dad is very similar to your dad, where I remember just growing up, we were a big family. My dad, everyone knows my dad. He's so popular. He's so

friendly. Women are just going after him. He is a firefighter. He's a firefighter and he looks great for his age. And dare I say, quite a handsome man. He's ageder. He's a firefighter and he looks great for his age. And dare I say, quite a handsome man. He's aged well. He's a good aged dad. But like.

A well aged dad. He's aging like wine as opposed to milk. But I just remember growing up and people always, everywhere we went, store, church, anywhere, it was like, oh, it's the Millers. What's up? And like, I just was was like i want to keep that feeling of like familiar i love a familiar face like i even if i don't know you that well i think this is something that's helped me a lot in life is like that just wanting to be friends with you

immediately like when olivia and i met we became friends so quickly and like if i hadn't become friends with her i wouldn't be here. I lost my train of thought, but you know what I mean? Just. You want to be like your dad. Yeah. Do we, are we, do we all want to be like our dad? My dad was, my dad did hang gliding. I don't want to do that. I don't want to jump off helicopters and save people. Sorry. Yeah. That's what my dad does. My dad had a very hard life. And so I see a lot of the, uh, the ways that I'm like him already. And those are ways that I admired in him. So I'm very proud of that. But there are other things that, you know, you learn from either way. I'm very proud to have learned from my father the things that I want to take or the things, you start realizing that you're more and more like your parents. And it's very strange. Yep.

It's very strange. You just look in the mirror and you're like, like, sometimes I'll wear my hair a certain way and wear a certain outfit. And I'm like, whoa, I'm my mom. Holy crap. For me, it's vocal stuff and, like, the way I stand. Like, I sometimes, like, stand off just like this with legs spread spread apart and like, you know, this is a dad's dance. And also I came home from work the other day and just went. Yeah.

And I was like. I'll say things a certain way and I'll just hear my sister or even just like looking at my hands. I see my youngest brother, Connor. It's so weird. It's so weird. Genetics is strange, y'all. Genetics be crazy. And also just being raised by people, the environs in which, even

if it's not a genetic relation, it's like even with adopted kids, you will see that like, oh, you're just like your familial. Nature versus nurture. Who knows? Oh my God. Speaking of that, I saw that doc Three Identical Strangers. What? I still need to see that, but that's crazy.

Pump the brakes. I've never even heard of this. It's so crazy. to see that, but that's crazy. Pump the brakes. I've never even heard of this. It's so crazy. Separated triplets or something? Yes. Whoa. And it was an experiment. No, don't give it away.

Well, I'm not giving it away. The crazy beginning is like this one guy visited a college campus and all of a sudden everyone was calling him a different name. Like, what's up? And he was like, that's not me.

What the heck? Come to find out his twin that he did not even know about was going to that college. Yeah, he like went to the college the year before. And then there was a whole other sibling as well. I haven't seen it. Maybe we could watch it together. Okay, I'm down.

Well, come to my place. After Xanadu 2. Yeah, have apocalypse wine. And then it gets like all into that nature nurture thing. Yeah. But it's like, God, what a messed up scenario. Yeah. I highly recommend it.

It's on Hulu. I wonder, I got to wonder what that's like. Like if I had a lost sibling or something, like how similar would we actually be in terms of certain stuff? Because there are things that is just in our nature. It's like there's a lot of things about me that I'm very different from the rest of my family, but I take so much pride in, and I don't know what it came from. Like, so there's seven kids in my family.

And so there was a lot of pairing up, two oldest siblings and then the next two, and then big gap, me, and then another big gap, and then two little boys. Oh, wow. I was alone a lot. And I definitely developed my own sense of humor and my way of looking at the world in my solitude a lot of times. And that's something I recently worked through in therapy. Therapy is great, by the way. I highly recommend it.

Hells yeah. I don't think you'd find a single person in the Smosh family that would disagree. You don't have to be crazy to go to therapy. I'm crazy, but it's fine. I have a way of looking at the world that I can recognize is not common in my family at all, which is okay. Like, I think it's so good to have people with different opinions in your life and all that. But there are certain things that just don't come from just the people around you. Yeah, I could tell from those home videos you recorded by yourself. Yeah.

That definitely seemed like the time when you must have been alone for some time. Dude, you haven't even seen the worst of it. I don't think, because we did a React video to a bunch of your old videos. I don't think it'll be up at this point. Not for a little while. Teaser. That's my old YouTube channel,

but I also have home footage from before I knew how to upload. Like I would edit things on Windows Movie Maker, but I didn't know how to export. How many dozens of hours did that editing take for a 15 second clip? Oh, I loved editing. I was like eight. Movie Maker is such garbage. But I had literally, it was like a tape from a video camera that was called Cokie's Corner or something. And so we're going to watch that, I think.

If people like the YouTube channel React, then we'll delve even worse. It's really weird, dude. I'm weird. I'm a weirdo. That's wicked cringe. How many characters did you have in that one? In the series?

You played all of the characters in this video. They're all interacting with each other. How many were there? It was a series that I did. Had like 10 plus episodes called No Vacancy. And it was basically a bunch of different versions of me living in my bedroom. There was Courtney, which was me. Nino, the emo.

Nino is one of my nicknames as a kid. Nev, who was the nerdy, smart one. Kesha, who's just the sassy party girl. Wow, where'd you get that name? So creative of me to think of that. How many dollar signs? One, just one, the basic one. A dollar sign, huh?

There was Journey, the hipster. Sally, the cowgirl. Gail, the hipster, Sally the cowgirl, Gail the like, I don't even know, she was just goofy. Crazy one? No, no, no. Shannon was the psycho rabid one, but then there was Gail the like the like calm, goofy

one. Just so you know, like three characters ago I thought to myself, that's a lot of characters. Yes. Oh, and there lot of characters. Yes. Oh, and there was temporary characters. God. There was visiting characters that would come and go as well that were not PC. But that's okay. Times are different.

I will admit. One, you're just in blackface. I mean, hey, that's the Shane Dawson thing. Oh, God. No, that's the Shane Dawson thing. Oh, God. No, that's the thing. Media is changing and it's becoming so wonderful, but it had to grow from somewhere, right? Okay? Where the people are growing, the internet's growing, content's growing. Yeah, and you never actually did blackface.

No, I didn't. Obviously not. So that's good. Well, it's that thing, too, where they said something, like John Wayne said something super racist back in the day. And it was a quote from the 70s, and people are, like, outraged about it now. And it's just, like, for me, it's the Bill Burr quote of, like, what did you think he thought? Like, he's an old man.

He's a cowboy. What do you think he thought? It's, like, it doesn't mean it's okay at all. But it's, like, what are you doing? Even by 70s standards, it was pretty freaking off base. I didn't hear what it actually was. I did not read the quote. If it ends up being horrible, it doesn't mean I agree with it.

I had no idea. There was one thing that he said that I thought was hilarious. He was like, because the writer was asking him about the fact that he doesn't cast minorities in his films. Oh, God. Please cut out everything I just said. Oh, no. And he was like, I cast minorities where they should be. I casted a black person as a slave in this movie.

Ground breaking. Damn, dude. For the love of God, everyone. Shoot, dude. I didn't read the John Wayne quotes. That's not what I believe. Yeah, I should have briefed you on the John Wayne quotes. It's okay.

I could pull up more if you'd like, but. No, please. I disagree with all of them. Across the board. I like the myth that John Wayne only ate meat and potatoes and then when he died, they did an autopsy and found 10 pounds of meat and potatoes

and it's stuck in his colon. He was trying to go on hibernation. But I think it's all some BS. No, my brother's friend knew his cousin who was in the neighborhood with this dude who did the autopsy. Oh, wow. Isn't that how those stories go

when someone doubles down? They're like, no, dude, that was a real thing because my friend, he saw it on the internet. That's half the stories I have because I don't experience anything in my own life, so I just have to regurgitate stories that I've heard from other people. Like emotions. Exactly. That's a thing, though, with John like, John Wayne and, you know, so many people from back then.

It's like you don't, of course there's something that somebody said in the past that was not good. But, like, I think it's good that we're moving forward and recognizing what's okay and what's not okay. Like, Lilly Singh, she tweeted, And it's kind of the same thing. Like, it's like you said, with John Wayne, you're like, oh, what do you think? A 1970s cowboy, of course he had that kind of opinion type thing. Lilly Singh tweeted, I'm a woman, I'm colored, I'm bisexual, and these are my powers. And apparently that was her coming out. And, like, for me, it was like, we've been new.

Like, I thought, I was like, wait, I thought everybody knew that. We've been new. Yeah. Yeah. I mean. I thought it was a thing. I mean, you can never assume. And you never want to.

True. And obviously, that's one other thing. You never want to out somebody. Of course. Unless they've clearly outed themselves. Yeah. Especially if you get it wrong yeah yeah imagine if i tweeted like yeah like you know how lily sings bisexual and she like

didn't even say anything like that that would not be good world of oops yeah big old basket of whoopsie daisies i think it's that's super important it's not just it's not just like sexuality but also people that struggle with with uh mental health yeah uh people that struggle with mental health. Mental illness, yeah. People that struggle. Normalizing those things is so important. And, like, that's a thing, too. Like, I am not straight. That's something that I only recently started working through, and I'm still kind of working through it.

But it is something that I've felt is important for people to know because it's like let's normalize like it's so important to normalize things that people are insecure about like I'm still a little insecure about like what exactly it is like I remember when I I didn't even realize it and literally until a couple years ago when I started because I grew up in the Mormon uh church and and when I was 12 I realized that Mormons hated there are a lot of them not I won't generalize but when prop 8 the gay marriage like proposition was a thing a lot of my friends in the Mormon church were like gays are bad all this terrible thing and I was like whoa and I and I left the church at that point wasn't until

I was 21 ish that I was like I mean all my life I'd kind of wondered and like the fact that I kept wondering it wasn't like a like a naive like am I gay I don't know it was definitely like man this is something that I need to relax and like think about because for so long I was like yeah I'm straight that's what I am because that's what I thought I was supposed to be but like there was so many conflicting things with that I don't know if I'm bisexual but because like that that's kind of limiting to gender because I've definitely found people who are gender fluid like attractive just I think I don't Just I think, I don't know, everybody's hot. I don't know, man.

It's a spectrum. And I remember the first people I told were, it was definitely Matt Robb and Joe Barretta were there. It was a Defy Media Christmas party. Whoa. And that was the first time. I didn't know this. Yeah.

Yeah. That was the first time I'd said out loud that I don't think I'm straight. And for the longest time, I was just thinking about it and kind of like let those walls down that I'd had up for a long time. I'm hot in the face right now. Well, I fully support everything you're saying. I think the coolest thing is there might be a kid or anybody out there right now who really needs to hear this. Yeah. Especially coming from you.

And it feels very much like a fluid thing. And I also, I think I have a weird type, too. Because, okay, when I was a kid, my mom had a lot of drawing books and, like, comic book books, including this Wonder Woman one that I always loved. I really loved the artwork and everything. And so literally a couple months ago, I messaged my mom and I was like, hey, like, do you have that Wonder Woman book? That's super old one. I'd love to like add it to my collection. I have drawing books.

I have a Guardians of the Galaxy book like for my coffee table. And she sent it to me and I'm going through it. And it's just really sexually charged drawings of women. And I was like, oh, okay. That's why I like looking at that. So basically my type is Wonder Woman. I mean, I think that's something we can all agree on. Face painting.

Sorry, my knuckles are super dry. It's okay. Before fans get weird, something I realized throughout all this just now is like, Olivia and I have kissed in videos. Calm down. We definitely do those for you. I'm not like Olivia shipping.

Cortivia shipping is a fun thing, but I'm not attracted to Olivia. I'm not attracted to any Mari, Sarah, nobody. It's not like, oh, every girl is a potential for me. I mean, that's a general thing. It's the same thing. It's the same for all that. Yeah, I'm straight. Not every girl that I interact with I have to date.

Our first video together. Wait, what? Our first video together, speed drawing. People were immediately, since I was this new girl in a video, making sexual comments. It's just what happens. But, yeah, I just wanted to disclose that. Olivia, I love you.

I'll kiss you any day you need. But I'm not into you like that. Sorry, babe. For sure. But, yeah. just wanted to disclose that like olivia i love you i'll kiss you any day you need but like i'm not into you like that sorry babe like um but yeah well i applaud you for talking about this i really do because i think you like you said whatever whatever the thing is whether it's whether it's mental health whether it's sexuality whether it's gender whether it's anything like things are only quote-unquote weird because we don't talk about them that's why like when I get the opportunity I talk about mental health stuff all the time anxiety panic attacks paranoia like all that good stuff I deal with that I do and it's only weird because it's not talked about and that's it's not your job to talk about it necessarily but I think you have done and can do

a lot of good because there's someone out there right now who's just like probably bawling being like, oh my God, that's me and it's okay. Like I'm proud of you. It's so important. And I think you bring up a good point where you said, I don't know what I am. And that's okay. That's okay. Because I think people feel such a need to adhere themselves to a specific identity that they might not actually completely.

People need to label things. Yeah. And feel secure. But like we should probably stop doing that so much. Yeah, completely. But I think that there is some safety in that in saying, I don't know, but I'm figuring it out. And especially like young people, like, yeah, everybody's had the thought before, like, am I? Yeah, everyone wonders.

What is this? I didn't know what anxiety was until like 16 because it's not something that was talked about. I wasn't on the internet that much at that time. It's like you got to talk about that stuff. People need to know. I was diagnosed OCD two years ago, and I had no idea that what I was experiencing was OCD

because I just took that as like, I've got to organize stuff and check this doorknob six times. That is OCD. And it's just like, oh no, it's the way my mind works and how I deal with things, which leads to anxiety, yada, yada, yada. And I've got to say, you know, even though this doesn't have to do with sexuality, I can understand the comfort in finding a label. You know, even if it's better to maybe not label so you can like figure things out you know finding

out that I had a word for what I was feeling I could be like ah I have OCD yeah it's the same way with someone who goes like I'm bi got it check done like you know I definitely like the most secure way to say it for me is just being like oh yeah I'm not straight like that's just because and I it could be pansexual. It could just be bisexual. I don't know, whatever. But like, I just realized in these last couple years, it was like right as I was in a new relationship that I was like, wow. And like, I remember I was I was coming out to certain people.

But like, my stomach growled just so loud. I hope you all heard that. I did not hear that. Some people I didn't go about it the right way. Like, I thought people knew already, and they'd be like, oh, I didn't know that. And, like, I definitely had some people that probably got upset when they found out. Like, there's – and you never – you'll never really know who's tolerant of that stuff. Like, there's – I didn't know that I had a homophobic person in my friend circle.

Like, you don't – you'll never know. And sometimes, yeah, you'll just just you will never find that out but yeah yeah it's it's crazy man it's been a journey sometimes people need time to like you know maybe if they were like i don't know but like i think i said this in my stream recently somebody was just like i came out to some friends and my best friend won't talk to me now. And I said, like, unfortunately, try your best to be the bigger person and forgive them for yourself for now to try to, like, save yourself a lot of grief. Because they might not have never actually been exposed to anybody that they knew was gay before. And then once they do some thinking, they'll be like, oh, that person is still that person. Holy crap. And so then two weeks later in the stream, they're like, yo, my best friend reached out and apologized.

And now we're hanging out again. And it's just like, well, there you go. Yeah. And that person that was upset when they found out, they didn't tell me they were upset. I could just very much tell. And then they basically told me that they were homophobic later. But they're still in my life. I think it's okay to have people around.

Like, don't just keep people with the same opinions as you. I mean, it's good to have those people, but it's also people with the same opinions as you i mean it's good to have those people but it's also good i mean homophobia is a terrible thing yeah that's that's not an opinion we really we really welcome around these parts no no and just be tolerant be accepting whatever like not whatever but you know what i mean that person's still in my life i don't hate them it's you know like we are all here on our own path. Yeah. Well, thank you so much for sharing that, Courtney. That takes a lot.

And I think, you know, for some of the people listening, I think that's something that needs to be heard. I'm always a big supporter of, you know, getting these sort of problems out here. And that's what podcasts are really good for because, you know, everyone's struggling with something. And it's nice to hear that other people have these things going on. Totally. With my ex, Pam, she was a cancer survivor. And she always kept it secret yeah and and when we were together I told her like this is this is you could help people by by talking about it raising awareness totally and um when she had her sort of last scare she she then started talking about it

more and talking about it more being more involved in in the community. It's awesome. And it really helps people. It does. There's so many people that we only get to meet a few of those some people like for through Make-A-Wish people. We really like help them through their struggle, even just by existing. But like when you find somebody like like Pam that like they can relate to on that level, that's so special. Yeah, it's inspiring and not just in the way of just being like,

ah, so inspiring. You did it. But it's like, it shows that it's like, you're not gonna let this hold you back and stop your life. Obviously, there are physical limitations that you have to deal with, but it's just like, Pam didn't stop. Pam's still doing stuff. Pam is kicking butt.

She's kicking ass is what she's doing. Again, I'm still trying to figure this out. I'm still learning a lot about myself every day and there are things I'll look back on my past and I'll be like, oh yeah, that's why I did that thing. That's why I liked

that girl. That's why I watched Friends with all the nipples. There are a shocking amount of nipples in Friends, by the way. Are you coming to this realization? Oh my God! I didn't watch Friends until like three years ago

and I was like, and this was network TV? This isn't Showtime? They got away with some nipplage. I should have gotten away from Game of Thrones, alright? Let's all... away with some nipplage. I should have gotten away from Game of Thrones alright. I've thought about joining a subreddit to help myself

discover exactly more about what this is and how to go about it and deal with it you know. Subreddit any recommendations?

The Brave Exvius go about it and deal with it you know subreddits any recommendations uh i've never been xv is subreddit it's for a video game i play oh okay yeah i've never been a redditor i i'm very new to it there's a lot there and i'm afraid that if i get into it i'm not going to be able to leave it my roommate spends a lot of time on if it exists there's a subreddit about it. You know what I'm saying? I'm very new. Literally in the last six months, I started getting into Reddit. I did peruse through the rcringe once or twice,

but the issue with that is there's a lot of submissions that I'm like, that's somebody with mental problems and you're making fun of them. And it's like, ah, that's real rough. But I do love me some quality cringe. Not ones that make fun of people,

but people just in funny situations. How many panels would you say that cringe should have? Like, would you say like four panel cringe would maybe feature

some friends of ours? I don't know what that means. Oh, a long time ago, Joven got featured on four panel cringe. You don't remember that? Oh,

I think I heard about that. No, I didn't see that. Joven was on 4 Panel Cringe. It was a bummer. What is it? It was funny for a minute. 4 Panel or is it 4 Chan? 4 Panel because it was just like a 4 Panel comic.

What was the cringe? Oh, I'm not trying to like crap talk Joven. I thought this was a thing everybody knew about. I thought everybody knew about this. I'm sorry. Joven pulls the cringe cards. I love you, Joven, so much. I'm sorry.

I thought this was a known thing. No, I'm going to check this out. It's okay. I'm sorry. Joven pulls the cringe cards. I love you, Joven, so much. I'm sorry. I thought this was a known thing. No, I'm going to check this out. It's okay. We love him. We love, we stan Joven. Moving along, because we don't have much time left. We've been selling those I Help shirts.

Oh, yeah. There's still, there's still some out there. How long do we know? How long they're going to be out? Because it's like limited time. Until they run out. Ooh. So disney. Until they run out. Ooh.

So disney. Limited run. So disney. And somebody got an I helped tattoo. Yes. I couldn't believe it. I did not. I was literally like, I was like, no, that's Penn.

I was like, you can see the redness. There's the redness there. Oh my God. And it's so cute and little. In the Comic Sans font. Yep. Amazing. What if that was her first tattoo? Girl. I didn't see anything else. I it's so cute and little. In the Comic Sans font. Yep. Amazing. What if that was her first tattoo?

Girl. I didn't see anything else. I didn't see any other tattoos. I'm not saying bad. It's like, wow, like, we are special. We stan you. We are special. Was that, oh, God, what's her name?

Miranda Sings, yeah. Miranda Sings. We are special. I see too many quinches. Would you guys get any tattoos? Do you guys have any tattoos? Sorry, I'm like holding back a burp right now. Oh, I do that all the time.

The one tattoo I wanted to get was, they're like Nordic runes, the way you write them. Oh, nice. They're sort of like Skyrim. Skyrim. The Nords are here for Nords. You can sort of combine them into like one letter using all the different parts,

and that's how you'll like write initials or a name. So I wanted to get like my dad's initials or just like the initials of people that matter to me. But the problem is, do you know who else loves Nordic runes as tattoos? Shane? Shane? Well, white supremacists. And I was so like, that's why you got to be really careful with symbols because every

once in a while a group will just be like, right, I'll have that then. And then you're just like, oh, no, I'm not a white supremacist. Staunchly against it. So that's a bummer. So otherwise I might just get a Dark Souls or a Kingdom Hearts right there on the shoulder. Cute. But do you know who else likes Dark Souls? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Nazis. You know, probably. No, no, no, no, no. What a bummer, though, right? To be like, this is what I'm going to get. Oh, what? And then. Oh my gosh.

So sad. No tattoos on me, but I've wanted them for forever. It's just like, cause I know I don't want to have just one, you know, like it's a, it's a whole canvas. You don't want to just put one little thing in the corner. That's I mean. I definitely want, I used to want like a big messy bouquet of wildflowers like somewhere

and that was I've had a lot of weird experimental I draw them and then I'll sit on them for a couple years and either they go away or whatever and the ink doesn't transfer so you're like that didn't work out I definitely want to get a bee for my mom my mom's obsessed with bees, bees are her brand

I had an ex-girlfriend with a bee on her back. I'd love to get... Wait, really? Was it her mom? Did you... I actually did, yeah. I don't think it was for her mom. I think it was for her grandmother

who really liked bumblebees. Wait, did you date my mom? I'm your real dad! Father? I knew I was different. Tis I. This is the true reason why we had the two of you guys

on this week. This just became Montel Williams. But I want a bunch of tattoos. I definitely want to get, I think it would be so cool to get a little helicopter on me for my dad. Things about people that I care about. Something from my great grandmother. Like I wanted to get like a map of the Colorado River on my like right shoulder blade. Oh, that's cool.

Or like there's this one South Korean tattoo artist who does super detailed, beautiful little things of dogs and cats. And there's a specific picture of Django. I'd love to get curled up Django somewhere. Aw. I only had it for a year, but it's still special. It doesn't matter. It's still in your heart. I'd love to get some tattoos for my dogs in my past.

Just definitely the things that I carry with me anyway and be able to have art to express um about you my dude uh no i don't we're so lame like i i don't and i've i've thought about it before but then it's also like like an acting thing like oh then i'm just gonna be that guy that always has that tattoo and also actors i think think Neil deGrasse Tyson said a really funny thing about tattoos he said because he was asked if he has any tattoos and he says there's nothing that I'm so certain of that I'd want

to put it on my body forever I'm like oh that's very interesting. What does Neil deGrasse Tyson thing to say? Just say a normal thing dude I'm sorry there's nothing more certain that's really good it's like if you got the Nordic tattoo Just say a normal thing, dude. There's nothing more certain. That's really good.

Nice. It's like if you got the Nordic tattoo, and then you're walking down the street, and all of a sudden there's a neo-Nazi rally walking by, and they see your tattoo. They're like, hey, brother, come on over here. Welcome back. Punch and chips in the back. And you're like, I don't want punch and chips from you, man. That's so true. You don't like other races. Like what?

Punch or chips? Punch and chips. What do you think happens in a white supremacy rally? There's juice and punch. I don't know. Chips, punch and cookies. I've never had a punch chip combo before. People used to do that cookies and lemonade stuff.

Chips and lemonade. Cookies and lemonade? Actually amazing. That's a classic thing. No joke. It's a classic thing. No. Summertime snacks.

Summertime. But that's so true though. Constantly changing. I think that's not a lot of people. A lot of people are like against change but being open to that and being aware that you're a constantly changing person is like open minded. But like if it's something permanent like

a person that was in your life that no doubt had an effect on you. What if you got a John Wayne tattoo? Oh no. Family only for me. Sorry. But what if you got a John Wayne tattoo? Oh, no. Oh, God. Family only for me. Sorry. Someone did the other day say to me, you know, even if I regret a tattoo, because he had

a lot of tattoos, he's like, I will not regret where I was in my life when I was certain that I wanted that tattoo. Sure. And I was like, well, that makes sense then. That makes a lot of sense. But then you have to explain your John Wayne tattoo. And I was like, well that makes sense then. That makes a lot of sense. But, um. But then you have to explain your John Wayne tattoo. Like look, okay I didn't know that he didn't like

black people when I got this tattoo. I thought he was just a cowboy in movies. What did you think he thought? What? I don't know. Why did he not? Maybe I'm an asshole, I don't know. Uh, yeah, I mean tattoos are cool.

I think tattoos are cool. I love them. I just, there's nothing that really jumps out at me that I'd want. I don't even know where I'd put it. Dude, I think something Smosh-related somewhere. On your right ass cheek, my dude. Something. Yeah, just like a little.

If you've gone to the Olympics, people put the Olympics symbol on them. I think that's totally valid. Something like that. Smosh, come on dude. One of our camera guys said that if we paid for it, he would get our faces on him. No way, for real? Mitch has Lily,

Jocelyn. The girl's from Clever. He has the Clever girls on his hip. It's amazing. Because he just wants an excuse to get more tattoos. Somebody used my face as a template for a tattoo. They used like a selfie I had taken of like my profile

and they used that for a tattoo idea. Shoot dude. Shoot dude. It's a beautiful tattoo. Where is that from? Because I want to start saying it. We said it in the first podcast I think. Oh I watched it. Shoot dude. Shoot dude. So this is now my catchphrase I guess. I love it. I love it. We said it in the first podcast, I think. Oh, I watched it. Shoot, dude. Shoot, dude. This is now my catchphrase, I guess.

I love it. I love it. I love it. Olive oil? Oh, God. Excuse me. Would you guys like some olive oil? It's my favorite thing.

It hurts me. Olive oil? Oh, God. Okay. Okay, okay, sorry. We're giving people chills right now that are listening on headphones. I hate ASMR. Yeah. Oh, my right now that are listening on headphones. I hate ASMR. Yeah.

Oh, my God. This is soap curls. All right. I'm just so over ASMR now since it got a Super Bowl commercial. Like, what the hell was that? What was that? I don't even. It was like Pepsi or something.

They did an ASMR commercial for the Super Bowl. I'm like, okay. Some ad person was like, now what's hip and hot these days? And somebody's like, ASMR. But it's so awkward. You're there with a party, a bunch of people,

and then you're all watching funny commercials, then it's some person just like opening up a Pepsi and a microphone like, Pepsi. Pepsi.

Pepsi. Pepsi. When did it become ASMR? Because for me, that's just any NPR radio. There was ASMR Vines. Joining us today is a man who was born without a pelvis, who recently was featured in the Olympics.

Coming up next. Who is the guy? Okay, my ASMR that I like. What is the actor's name who plays Bob's Burgers and Archer? H. John Benjamin. H. John Benjamin. I could listen to his voice that I like. What is the actor's name who plays Bob Zwerger as an archer? H. John Benjamin. H. John Benjamin. I could listen to his voice until I die. Literally, if I'm on fire and that's how I'm dying, just put on some H. John Benjamin and I will be smiling to the end.

Okay. What if H. John Benjamin is the one killing you? Perfect. Perfect way to go. That seems like a perfect place to stop. H. John Benjamin, H.

John Benjamin, if you're out there, hit us up. We have a girl for you to murder. Yes. Thank you guys so much for watching and

staying around to the end. We love you so much. Love you. If you're not yet subscribed to the podcast, I highly suggest you do that.

And we would all love you so much for that. Love you. This podcast is on every... Is that your timer? Oh, it's the timer on this. Look at Mr. Airplane Mode, who told us to put everything on air.

I had a clock. I had a clock on here. Mute your computer. Oh, I just closed the window. This is great, guys. This is great. See, we're still figuring things out. Love you.

Subscribe. I love you. Make sure you subscribe. The audio podcasts always come out on Wednesdays for now. They are uncensored. And if you're watching this on YouTube, sorry, it's censored. You know, adpocalypse. And that will be out on Friday.

The I Help shirt is still on sale as far as I know. So go check that out. Smosh.com. And we'll see you next time thank you so much Courtney and Damien thanks for having me thanks for having us Ian

I had a wonderful time today I love you guys thank you for kissing me gently on both eyes my handsome boys I love you high fiving

we love you just as you are stop acting like this it's our brand I'm sorry love you bye