Smosh Mouth - S1: #7 - The Return of Smosh Games

Episode Date: April 3, 2019

Mari and Lasercorn join Ian to talk about the triumphant return of Smosh Games, Mari’s cucumber obsession, and why Lasercorn is afraid to open Instagram in front of his wife. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Ramble. That's what I want to do going forward. You know, we're just a big old family. Ramble. because I follow cosplayers. And now I open my Instagram and it's just like butts, butts, butts. I'm like, hey, whoa, okay. You guys don't... No, no one eats cucumbers this way.

You don't double fist cucumbers and then just like... Nope. He won't stop. Please stop doing it. I'm nervous. I'm nervous too. This is the first time

I've ever done a podcast with like headphones like this. Really? How does it feel? It feels weird. It's like, why do I need the headphones if I'm right next to this but but i can yes that way that way if you're screwing up and talking way out here you'll know it yeah that makes sense yeah hey everyone and welcome to a smosh cast today i am joined by uh some some very wonderful

people that i love very much uh mari takahashi and Laser Corn from the Smosh Games. Maybe you heard of it? No. Maybe you heard? What's that? Smosh Games. Smosh? Some dumb channel.

Smosh Games. So, yeah, I've gotten a couple comments, just a few, being like it doesn't matter what I post on Twitter, if it's something about, you know, a war or cats or anything. The response I get is, where is Smosh Games? Yes. It doesn't matter what the hell I say. There's always some person,

and it has nothing to do with what I tweeted. And there's like, where's Smosh Games? Give me Smosh Games. Every time I see that comment though, I'm very grateful for the demand. Yes. There's demand in the market.

There is demand. There's demand because Smosh Games is wonderful and the people in it are wonderful. Aw, you're wonderful too. Yeah. So for those wondering, Smosh Games is coming back April 10th. What? April 10th.

We're just finding out now too. Just kidding. This is a wonderful surprise. That was a big surprise. You don't have a choice, you have to be a part of it. They will hold us at gunpoint. Awesome. Yeah, we're gonna be playing some Mortal Kombat.

Oh, yeah. Which I am excited about. Yep. Zub Zero. You know, I just realized. Zub Zero? Yeah, I always call him Zub Zero. Zub Zero, yeah. I realized that Mortal Kombat is one of the first games we played all together.

Do you remember? At the old studio in Sacramento, the tiny, tiny one. Yeah. It was like one of the first ones that we played together. And wasn't the punishment the person that lost got fatality? Yeah, like badly edited fatality or just like whatever we could do in Premiere. I'm like, I think I could take his head off and add a blood effect. Yeah.

Yeah. I remember that. It didn't look that great, but it was really funny. I think it was me. Was it me? Yeah. Did I get fatality? I think SoHinky might have fatality.

It's like bottom three. Yeah. Yeah. I think I got fatality. I think SoHinky might have fatalitized you yeah yeah I think I got fatalitized I remember there was something about the moon am I thinking of a different video that was the high five oh okay

that was the announcement video yeah that was the announcement video on Clever Games was it back when so which is gone now

you can't find dude I went to look up the other day sorry to change topics the uh the oh shit I thought I turned that off come on dude I should probably turn my phone off too I thought I turned it off You can't find... Dude, I went to look up the other day. Sorry to change topics. Oh, shit.

I thought I turned that off. Come on, dude. I should probably turn my phone off, too. I thought I turned it off. Oh, my gosh. Am I the only professional here? I think so. I just don't know where my phone is. Here we go.

Yeah. All the old videos are gone. Like, Clever Games, you can't find Smosh Takes Over Clever Games anymore. It's just gone. Someone erased it. You got Machinimud. Yeah. You got Machinimud. Yeah, we got Machinimud. Oh, no.

They came for us. You know what would have been funny if somebody, after the DeFi closure, somebody bought Clever Games? Just Clever Games. Yeah, maybe that's what happened. Yeah, that could be.

And they're rebranding. Because there was a company that came in and bought all the trash that didn't sell. They're just like, yeah, whatever. I'll take that. What other properties did they have that they weren't focused on? I mean, they had Break, which used to be a really popular website.

Didn't they still have girl.com? Yeah, they had girl. Which is like a really good website. And just like the URL is so good. They also had teen.com. That's a great URL. Yeah. It's going to wind up a porn site, isn't it?

Well, so this is the thing. Oh my God. Okay, so this is the thing. When I was working on the process of pulling Smosh out myself, I was able to see all the things that defy owned and then i had the ability to bid or add things to the bid for smosh so with that there was a ton of urls that they owned um some of which uh were uh defy sucks.com. Really? Which we got. Nice.

Oh man. A lot of potential for that one. I think we also got breaksucks.com. We got a lot of really sexist, weird URLs that I'm guessing came from like the break era. Like we got this website. I think we got the website chickapedia.com. And there's also Asian Chicks Chickapedia

that I think we also got. Hey, I want that one. I want to run it. Yeah, okay. I'm the admin. She's got a birthday coming up. I think we own the URLs, but we haven't done anything with it. We thought it could be fun to do something with all these bad URLs.

It's so gross, man. I think they come from the break side because break basically built a business off of, I mean, most of it was sexist content. Which is like 2000s humor. It really just was. Yeah. And it's crazy how far we've come in such a short amount of time and just how, I mean, woke people got, you know, and it's just like it happened freaking quick.

Yeah. I mean, Break was a gigantic website. It was massively successful. It was a lot of like prank content, bro content. Fails. Yeah, fails, that kind of stuff. I used to watch fail compilations. But I think at the end,

there was one person running the website. Oh, really? Yeah, I'm not, I can't like speak fully to that, but it's crazy to see something that was so big, you know, become like irrelevant basically. Like I went to their like Twitter and they get like six likes on their posts. So it's very strange.

And I think that also goes into websites aren't really like a thing anymore. Like, yeah, there's Reddit, but if you think about it, like, what do you, what do you go to? Facebook, Twitter. Yeah. It's all broken down into social media. Yeah. Here's, here's my big question. Did you get the rights to blacksmosh.com? Because I think there's a lot of potential there. Oh, that's a good question. I should look into that. Yeah. Also, look, if we're doing spinoffs like that, SmoshDad.com, there's only one of us. It would just be me and my kid.

Okay. Daddies of Smosh. Dad Smosh, yeah. Excuse me. I am Daddy Smosh. What? Oh, yeah. Don't get it twisted Daddy Smosh. What? Oh, yeah. Don't get it twisted.

Well, the people that call you Daddy are not the kind of people you want to put up with. That's probably true. That's probably true. Main toddlers. Yeah. But it is kind of strange how you have this giant internet, and now it's become so whittled down to just a few properties that are massively successful. Like even like even Smosh.com, like it was like we had insane like visit numbers devote time and effort and money into a website, which was like, here's some funny pictures.

Yeah, I think it has to be something flooded with content consistently. Like we've gotten so used to the Reddit sort of things or like even a Twitter feed sort of thing where we're bombarded with stuff. And if it's not that, it's too slow for the average consumer nowadays. Yeah. I'm trying to even think of another website I go to regularly outside of the big ones. Amazon. Amazon. That's right.

And talk about a monopoly. I mean, that has just taken over. Yeah. There's only a few websites that I go to aside from, you know, the obvious Twitter, Facebook, Instagram. Like I go to Kotaku every once in a while. I'm like, oh, what's happening in video games? And I go to like Jalopnik whenever I want to be like, oh, what's going on in cars?

Yeah. And that's about it. I'll still go to Rock Paper Shotgun occasionally. But yeah, it's like if I just want to read a review and I don't want to watch it and I want to skim through to the parts I care about, I'll actually go to a review site. But yeah, aside from that, I'm just like, I could probably find something I need on YouTube or something. Yeah. Even like gaming journalism, like that's, I feel like that's kind of dying. Like it's becoming more and more irrelevant because people will just go to, they'll just

go to Metacritic and just kind of look at it or they'll go to their favorite YouTuber and see what they have to say about it. Like I feel like more people rely on, you know, video game Dunkey than GameSpot. He's so funny. Yeah, I wonder how much it's like cherry picking for our generation too.

But, you know, I also feel like if you're subscribed to like the Wall Street Journal or, you know, like Entrepreneur or something, you're getting those every day and you're kind of more in the circuit of, like, reading stuff every day. I feel like for most people, we just cherry pick whenever there's something interesting to us in that moment. Because, yeah, like the last time I read anything on Kotaku was probably a couple of weeks ago and it was just only because of um the uh what was it called the Ubisoft uh all girls group uh oh I don't I don't know this oh I can't remember gamer chicks or something like that but yeah it was the demise of that what is this they they only play Ubisoft games but they're no it was a Ubisoft-sanctioned all-women's group. And they weren't necessarily like eSports.

A group to do what? Go to events, mostly all gaming stuff. Melanie Mack was actually a part of it super early on. I remember they had a really cringy announcement video, right? I don't remember. I just know that it was Ubisoft sanctioned and then a few years went by and they just no longer had the support.

And it was really early on. I just wonder if there's going to be something like that again. I think it happens in small doses, but yeah, that was just something that was built. Sorry, it's called Frag Dolls. Frag Dolls. Frag Dolls. Frag Dolls.

Thank you, Kevin. Thank you. Kevin, our producer, coming in with the knowledge. Kevipedia.com. Get that one. Kevipedia. Yeah. That's a website I'd visit.

We're going to call that now. We're going to call it Kevipedia. Let's consult Kevipedia real quick. Thank you so much. I should have been doing the research myself. My bad. Yeah, you got the laptop. Frag Dolls.

I didn't think. I've heard that name, but I never associated it with Ubisoft. I didn't know that they were Ubisoft. I hadn't either until I did some research. I thought it was just like a group of gamers, and I think I thought they were cosplayers too. Are they not? I don't think so.

Just gamers. I don't think they were cosplayers, yeah. Okay, then I got it wrong. I don't know what I'm talking about. I mean, Melanie Mack cosplays as Lara Croft sometimes sometimes she just is her yeah basically yeah but uh oh okay interesting yeah yeah yeah it's it's weird gaming gaming's also become like very singular in the fact that you know the rise of fortnite has sort of made it a thing where there can only be one like there can only be one game and like i feel be one game. And like, I feel, I hope Apex does better.

Like, cause it came out strong. Yeah, it's starting to overtake them. Yeah. It's funny. I see all these memes too. It's like, no, everyone stop wishing for the demise of Fortnite because all the 13 year olds are playing Fortnite

and we can enjoy Apex Legends. That's funny. That's true. That's what it's like kind of marketing itself as is like the adult Fortnite. So it's like, leave the kids over there playing Fortnite and we'll play Apex. And to be clear, I don't think Fortnite's a bad game. It's just not for me. Like there's nothing more frustrating to me than going to shoot someone and having a clear line of sight and getting like one shot off. And then a wall instantly appears in front of me.

Mine's the absolute opposite. Oh, really? I built a wall to protect myself. And the worst thing for me is somebody trying to break that down. What? I just don't like that person breaking the wall that I just made down. It's a shoot. You're supposed to be shooting.

Yeah. No, I don't. I made myself like a safety net. I want to stay there. Don't shoot at it. Also, no one can build a wall that fast. I know it's a video game. That's what you think.

All right. I just wish it wasn't a wall. I just wish it was like a light shield or something like more believable than like I instantly brick and mortared this thing. So you want more realism. In my Fortnite, yeah. It's a stupid complaint. I know it is i just i just don't i'm just not like a huge fan of it like i and when it comes to competitive online

shooters i've just pretty much like given up on them oh yeah i'm not good enough to play them yeah that's the issue because you know we are adults and we have you know things that we have to do with our lives we don't have five hours every day. Like when I was 15, for sure, I would, I would have that time to get good at it. But now, you know, I got, I got real life stuff that I got to worry about. Yeah. So I don't have the five hours to every day to train on Fortnite to, you know, Merc fools. But, uh, yeah. So I'll leave. The gank noobs or whatever the kids are saying. But. That's what those kids are saying out there, right?

Yeah, that's what they're saying. The Fortnite kids? Yeah. It's been interesting to gauge how Fortnite is doing by asking my seven and nine-year-old nephews. Wow. Because they were on it, like, as soon as Fortnite really got big with Ninja

and all that stuff, and they were right on top of it. And they were on it like as soon as Fortnite really got big with Ninja and all that stuff. And they were right on top of it. And they're super obsessed. And the way that like little kids are able to absorb information is so crazy. Because they know like every single gun, every single weapon in it. And it's still like really hot for kids. Yeah. It's still the number one i wonder if back in the day when i was like super into halo

if me talking about halo constantly was was like there if there was an older generation that was like oh my god this hay i just can't wait for this halo fad to die out i wonder if there was that and i just never noticed them i to a degree but i think fortnite's eclipsed that yeah just the access to the game is unprecedented like you can get it on mobile yeah that's true xbox playstation you get it switch yeah so literally anything that has a screen and buttons you could play fortnite on and it's free yeah so there's not a there's not a 60 like you know gate that's holding you back from playing it. It hits so many generations because I know my brother

started playing it as research for his kids to see if it was appropriate or not and he's completely obsessed and he only plays on mobile because he's always

on the road. Mobile just seems like the most clunky. I would never even try it. I think that's the only way I would win. What?

On mobile? Maybe. I don't know. It just seems like it would be so much harder. I think that's the only way I would win. What? Is it on mobile? Maybe. I don't know. It just seems like it would be so much harder. I don't play many mobile games at all, really. I don't. I used to play Hearthstone. Oh, I just got Final Fantasy Tactics on mobile because I missed that one.

And I'm like, oh, this is a cool game that I can go back and play on mobile. But other than that, I have like two games and then I have a Kindle full of books, you know. I'm like an 85 year old lady. I have Solitaire and a Match 3 game. Those are the most hardcore games. My mobile game is scrolling through Instagram and hoping that I don't

accidentally double like a hot girl on Instagram. That's a fun game, yeah. That's a tough game. It's risky. It's so risky. Cause you're like, you're like scrolling through your feed or whatever. You're like, okay, don't, don't accidentally like twitch your thumb on this, on this photo. It's the scariest when you're looking at really old photos of somebody. Like if you've just gone way down, it's two years later. Never done that. I've never done it on accident, but it's like, it's really scary. Super high risk.

Yeah. Opening Instagram when my wife is around is always a huge risk. Oh, yeah. Because I follow cosplayers because I'll like meet them at conventions or whatever. And I'm like, oh, yeah, I'll follow you on Instagram. And now I open my Instagram. It's just like butts, butts, butts. I'm like, whoa, okay.

Scrolling. Oh, here's Ian. We should gamify it. We should like have to like mess with each other while one person scrolls through on your own account and it'll be like really embarrassing it'll be like scrolling through like an ex's like instagram or something and people mess around with you until you mess up oh no i've said it and i don't want to do it yeah terrible idea edit this out terrible but great if it's somebody else doing it

yeah Courtney opened up her phone next to me when we were waiting at YouTubers React and it was like straight up girl lingerie first thing I was like really Courtney and she's like I follow this person but she doesn't normally post these photos

she's never done this before i was like uh-huh sure i have like no shame i'm like you do you great job well done good for you do you guys have uh do you guys have a dummy instagram account that you use to follow people that you don't want people to know that you follow i used to have one but i lost the password so now I don't have it. Oh, no. I know. It's kind of sad.

Rip. But I feel like I had like two, like two, two sexy girls on that one. And then a lot of like baking, like DIY stuff. I never bake, by the way. No one must know that I'm into baking. Yeah. That was your dummy account. Well, because I didn't want to send send the wrong signal because I don't cook.

I just like watching other people cook. So that feed was just buns and bunt cakes. Yeah. Yes. Yes. Cookies and tits. I can't think of it. There was no alliteration there.

Oh, I don't want to see this. Biscuits and boobies. Biscuits and boobs. That's a good one. Taffy and tits? Buns and buns. Buns and buns. Yeah, I did it. I don't know how the hell we got

onto that subject. None of these subjects that we talked about were on your piece of paper. I know, thank you. My piece of paper that I posted in the front of my laptop. What have you guys been up to over these several months? Oh, yeah. Well, I've been getting fat, so that's been going well.

Yeah, baby. Yeah, team fat. Greg Miller. Team fat. Shout to Kinda Funny and Greg Miller. You have a great excuse, though. You're a daddy. I am a dad, which is the ultimate excuse to get fat.

Yeah, I got to get that dad bod going. Except for Joe Beretta's ruins ultimate excuse to get fat. Yeah. I got to get that dad bod going. Except for like Joe Beretta's like ruins, shatters the whole illusion. Yeah. He's like, oh, yeah, well, I got some kids. And he takes his shirt off. Yep. That man's built like a 22 year old. I know.

I'm so jealous. Raising a kid, doing that. I've been, I flew to New York. I checked out the Rockstar headquarters recently. Oh, cool. And, yeah, streamed with those guys. Played a little Grand Theft Auto 6. Played a little Grand Theft Auto what?

7, 8. The NDAs. No, they didn't show me anything cool. Sure. I'm winking at LaserCorn. For those that are listening right now and not watching. Did you actually get to play any of 6? What?

No, there is no 6. I'd be so mad. There is no 6. There is no six. There is no six. They've got to be building it. They probably are working on it. They are building it. It's in space.

No. Oh, man. If it was all Saints Row-ish and mixed all that, I wouldn't be mad at all. Yeah, they've got to go back to being a little more goofy. Yeah. But they probably won't ever. I think they kind of said that that was the previous generation. Now they're leaning more towards realism.

Yeah, I'm excited to see what they do next, but I did not get any sneak peeks. And I did a foam run the other night, a foam glow run. Is that a rave? No, it's like you run and you run through foamy things. What? They shoot foam on you and the foam glows. What?

It's hard to explain. Were you at the Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Awards? Yeah, I was there. No, these are like things you could sign up for. Like people put together runs and you pay an entrance fee. I don't believe you. And then they put glow. And they had a bunch of black lights.

So the glowy stuff reacts with the black lights. It's a real thing. Was it like a 5K? Yeah, it was a 5K. 5,000 miles. Yeah. 5,000 miles. Wow, good job.

That's exactly what that means. 5,000 miles. That. 5,000 miles. That's exactly what that means. 5,000 miles. That's what the K stands for. So, uh, I did that with, uh, with,

uh, Odom of the warp zone. Oh yeah. And, uh, yeah. And Justine and my wife and it was fun. Nice.

Odom of the warp zone. You made it sound like he's like a game of Thrones character. Yeah. First of his kind. Yeah. They, I'm actually going to after this after we do our Mortal Kombat thing I'm actually going

to Warp Zone who are shooting literally four minutes from here and I'm gonna do I'm gonna do a video with them too so yeah hell yeah they are coming back as well they were rescued from the pits of Defy. They were also rescued, yes.

Yeah, we pulled them out. I'm glad they're coming back. Yeah, man. Oh, I love those guys. They're awesome. And they're really funny, yeah. Can't wait to see what they do. We were just talking about this last night,

but every year when Game of Thrones comes back, they always do a last season wrap-up. And Game of Thrones, next season is coming up, and they haven't done season wrap-up. And Game of Thrones, next season is coming up, and they haven't done the wrap-up. I don't know what happened that last season. I need it. There's still time before the first episode. I'm panicking, Warp Zone.

First episode, April 12th. Oh, yeah, yeah. There's still time. There's still time. Don't give up hope. I'll tell them. I'll be like, Mari says you have to do it. Yeah.

Even if they don't post it up on video. Just for you. No, no. They're not going to post it. They're going to come to your house, Mari. Live. Live show. The Warp Zone live right in your living room.

How did you get in here? Now I'm expecting it. So back to the foam run. What is the foam made out of? Look, we don't ask this question. I don't know. It's like bubbles, foam. And it's just like the road is just full of bubbles?

No, they have specific sprayers you go under that spray foamy bubbles on you, and then the bubbles are infused with the stuff that reacts with black light. This sounds like a human car wash. You went through a car wash, and you're calling it a 5K. What? Well, it wasn't 5K of all foam. Some of it. You went through a car wash and you're calling it a 5K. What? Well, it was 5K. It wasn't 5K of all foam. Some of it was just running through a parking lot.

This just kind of sounds like a drug trip version of Holly. What? I can't believe you guys have never heard of these things. Did somebody like clean your body with the foam? No. Did you get into the car and just cover your car? There was no cleaning. You just run through it.

What? No. Oh, was my car covered? No. By the time we got to the very end, we were mostly dry. Because you're running, so you kind of dry off. So we were mostly dry. Does other people's foam get on you?

Other people have... Do you guys swap foam? All right. No, there was no foam swapping. You guys just... I like that we can't just simply run anymore. We have to make a game out of it. There's one where you get chased by zombies. Yeah, zombie runs.

Oh, yeah, that one sounds dope. Zombie runs, foam runs. There's rock and roll runs where there's bands every mile or something. I just don't see you doing this. I just don't. I don't see you doing it. Is it colorful foam? Is it like rainbow foam?

No. So when it comes out of the- Explain this, Mari. Why can't you listen? When it comes out of the frayers, it's just like white bubbles. It looks like bubble bath, okay, when it hits you. But then it has black light stuff in it so that when you run under the black lights, you turn colors. Doesn't it just turn colors if it's white?

Because doesn't white react to black light? Or is it like a different kind of color? No, but this stuff like turned red. This is killing him. Look at his eyes. They're so dead. What? Miriam.

Oh. Mari. Having to explain. Yeah. Mari, what have you been up to? What have you been up to? Have you been foam running? Have you done any fun runs?

No. Did you do a run where they shot at you? The only running that I've been doing is inside airports from trying not to miss my flights. Yeah. You've been literally, like in this past year, how many countries do you think you've been to? Oh, gosh. I wish I prepared and counted. I don't know.

I think I've been back to Japan like four or five times in a year. I'm so jealous. Yeah. Last, this past month, what month are we in? March? Are we in March right now? Yeah. March, I think I'm home for seven days out of the entire month.

My God, woman. I don't know why we pay rent for an apartment. Yeah. That's nuts. Yeah. So lots of traveling. You should Airbnb your place. Should, but it's illegal to. You can't do that with apartments. Right. Yeah. So lots of traveling. You should Airbnb your place. Should, but it's illegal to.

You can't do that with apartments. Right. Yeah. So I've been up to lots of traveling, lots of working for travel, or traveling for work. Something I got to do a couple weeks ago, which was really fun, was lobby Congress. Oh, yeah. For NASA, was it? Yeah. couple weeks ago which was really fun was lobby congress oh yeah it was for nasa um yeah so i went on behalf of bill nye's uh organization planetary society um to talk to our state senators in

california um about just being a private citizen and being interested in space and space advocacy and putting humans back into flight and really just being like, hello, I'm just a person in the state and I'm interested. I think that Congress should continue funding NASA. So Bill Nye approached you to do this? No, Bill has a team that allows for people to sign up to learn how to do this. Oh, okay. So they put you through training and stuff to make sure that you're not going to go in

there and- Well, when you lobby them, do you go in there and be like, we want you to sign this bill. Bill. Is that how you do it? Because that seems like it would be an effective strategy. I know nothing about lobbying. But if I had to guess, I'd guess that's how it goes. I think there was a really huge lost opportunity there.

I think you should come in with that pitch next year because you're going to kill it. You hear that, Nye? Get me. I'll push your initiatives through Congress with catchy songs. It was just a really cool experience, something that I never thought that I was important enough to do.

And I think it's a reminder that, like, as U.S. citizens, we're very privileged to be able to do it. So if you care about something, you can do it. Go do it. So that's all. Yeah, it's good stuff. And you're – I mean, you're super into space stuff.

But I'm not an expert, right? I'm not an engineer. I don't have a BS, like a Bachelor of Science. I'm a fan, but by no means am I some sort of expert. Well, I have a few questions, though. Is it true that there's more than 15 miles of space out there? More than 15 miles?

This is what I hear. You know, I believe it's true that there's more than 15 miles of space. She knows things. Is this a flat Earth thing? This is a resource we have access to. Is that a flat Earth thing? What? I don't know what shape the earth is. I assumed it was some sort of cube. Is it not?

I like that it's a cube for you and not a flat plate. I just play a lot of Minecraft. Okay. I assume they modeled that on real life, right? Yeah. There's definitely edges to it. Don't get too close to the edge. And if you punch a pig, you get just a nice little pork chop.

Yeah. Yeah. If you do it with something that's on fire, it'll already come cooked. Hey, look at that. Really? Yeah. Yeah, you've never gone out to a farm with just a flaming axe and just hacked. Oh, I thought you meant in the game.

No, no. Jesus, no. In real life. Wait, are there flaming weapons in Minecraft now? You can light a stick, I think, on... You can have a torch. So you beat it with a torch? I've never done that.

Yeah. Interesting. You can have it so that it cooks. Wait, can you hit things with a torch? I thought you could only place them. No, you... I'm so confused. Yeah.

We need to get back into it. We can get fact-checked by the comments on our Minecraft match. You'd think after this many years. We've been playing it for years. There's no excuse for us not to know this. We don't pay attention at all when we're playing. No, because I'm just trying to make sure that my stuff doesn't get blown up. Yeah, and I'm just trying to blow up your stuff.

Yeah. It's a constant point of panic. Yeah, I remember the recipe for TNT and that's about it. That's all that matters to you. Sand and gunpowder. You're just like ruining everybody's things. Yeah. That's the best part of the

game. That's very Laser Corn. Yeah, that's why they made the game. Speaking of your name, speaking of your name, Laser Corn your name, Lazercorn, I think it's very strange that I've called you by your real name maybe twice in my life. Why would you do that? And referring, like, it's very strange talking about you

to people that don't know Smosh Games because I'm like, well, Dave, but I don't call him Dave. Yeah, I do. I honestly do. Cause yeah. But I'm, I always have to explain it to people. I'm like, okay, so like he goes by Laser Corn. I don't have time to get into it, but, but that's just what I call him. That's what everyone calls him, I guess. uh it's very strange calling you by your by your real name no i and even me when i introduce myself to people i have to take a second and think about what context i'm in i'm like is this a social context where these people don't know me as laser corn or is this like uh a gaming thing where i should introduce myself as laser corn and a lot of times when when people are like oh, what's your name? I'm like, uh, and that wears people out.

It's like, because they're like, you have to think about your name. Like, who pauses, who pauses to think about what name they're going to give? There's two people. There's YouTubers

who have an alternate persona and then there's serial killers who have made a new identity for themselves and they have to think about it for a second. Uh, Larry. Yeah. Not that guy that killed a bunch of they have to think about it a second. Larry. Yeah.

Not that guy that killed a bunch of people in that other county. Not Greg. Larry. I like to imagine that you just have an existential crisis every time it happens. And you just have fear in your eyes. Who am I? What's your name? Good question.

But what is my real name? I should just legally change my name to Laser Corn and be done with it. Then I would just only introduce myself as Laser Corn. First name, laser, last name, corn. And then force your wife and your baby to be also. And my parents. Tyler Corns? Tyler Corn.

Tyler Corn. People do call him that in the comments. I still call him Baby Corn, even though he's not at all a baby anymore. So Baby Corn is so delicious. I love Baby Corn. It is very delicious. It's so cute, too. How does it look like a little corn on the cob?

Baby Corn? Yeah. I'm not sure I know what you're talking about. Don't you eat Chinese food? It's always in Chinese food. Oh, maybe I have that. Little baby corns. Yeah, little baby corns.

Oh, yeah, yeah, okay. Now I know. Yeah, yeah. How does it get so small? It's magical. They just pick it before it grows up in the adult corn. They pull it out of preschool and then cook it alive. Oh, Jesus.

Oh, my God. Podcast got dark. Going back to it, I don't think I've... Hot cats got dark. Going back to it, I don't think I've ever called you Dave. Yeah. And when I refer to you, even to total strangers, I always say Laser Corn. Thank you. Without skipping a beat. It's until they're like, wait, your friend's name is Laser Corn?

And I'm like, yeah, he's got a tattoo. And then it's kind of like, you figure it out. Let's gloss over it. Let's just move on. Yeah. But yeah, don't call me Dave. Don't do it. Yeah.

He is Lazercorn and he identifies as a broom. Yes. I do identify. Should I ask about that or should we just move on? No. Yeah, just move on. Okay, great. How long do you think you're gonna keep the the orange hair

the i don't know oh my uh you know this probably uh our our hairstylist we go to the same person is moving is she really oh no i just i just dropped this on you yeah she's going to tennessee nashville nashville got her. I guess you guys can't ever get your hair colored ever again because nobody else does that in LA. This is the last time

you're going to see us like this. Other people do it but I'm like, is this a sign? Should I transition back to my natural hair color? I don't know.

I have considered transitioning back to brown. I might just find someone else and do crazy colors again but this might be the moment where I'm like, okay, hairstylist is leaving. Maybe it's time to go back to brown. I might just find someone else and do crazy colors again, but this might be the moment where I'm like, okay, hairstylist is leaving. Maybe it's time to go back to brown. Maybe it's time for this Marshall Mathers to finally give up Slim Shady. I don't

know. No. I haven't decided yet, but if I was going to transition back to brown, probably sometime this summer it would happen. But there's probably an equal chance that it's just going to transition back to brown probably sometime this summer it would happen but there's a there's probably an equal chance that it's just going to stay crazy colors yeah how about you are you keeping it yeah i'm staying purple okay a it's really easy because i don't have to go in for like two and a half months and then i just get to be lazy and it's still a cool color it is it looks very cool and i don't know who i am without that color it's true it's my whole identity don't know who I am without that color. It's true. It's my whole identity. Don't forget that your identity solely rests on how you look. That's true.

Let that be a message to everyone that's listening. Your outward appearance is the only thing that truly matters. You know what's so cute, though? You'll love this because you love my dad. When my hair was brown after the wedding last year, my dad's like, when are you going to go purple again? And mind you, my parents are like really conservative. So whenever I started to dye my hair, they were like freaked out.

Last year, right after this, my dad goes, when are you gonna dye it purple again? I'm like, dad, do you think I should go purple? And he goes, yeah, it's your branding. And I'm like, what? Oh, wow, dad. Wow, dad. I have a similar story.

I went home from my brother's wedding, and I didn't tell him I was doing this, but I went back to Brown for his wedding because I'm like, it's his wedding day. I don't want to be drawing attention to myself when he should be the focus. So I died at Brown, and I went back, and I'm like, yeah, I did it because I was his best man.

I'm like, I don't want to take the attention off you. He looked at me and goes, nah, don't like it. He was like, it should have stayed laser-coined. I'm like, I don't want to take the attention off you. He looked at me. He goes, nah, don't like it. He was like, it should have stayed laser-coined. Oh, wow. I'm like, no, I should have ran it by him. I actually looked and – Watch your pounding. I know you're very angry.

Yeah. I actually tried to find someone to dye it before the wedding, dye it back because that's what he wanted. But I couldn't get someone to do it. No one had the color on such short notice. Oh, no. So I couldn't get someone to do it. No one had the color on such short notice, so I couldn't do it. So I went brown. But always check with your loved ones if you're changing your hair color,

especially for an event that they are in control of because they don't always want you changing your color. I like imagining you being in Cleveland, Ohio, being like, no, I want my hair to be like a flame. Bright orange. Yeah, I'm showing them old pictures of me like this. Going to the Supercuts? Yeah, they're just staring at me like, no, I want my hair to be like a flame. Bright orange. Yeah, I'm showing them old pictures like this. Going to the super cuts? Yeah, they're just staring at me

like, what happened to you? I want to look like I'm torching. Well, I love the color. Oh, thank you. And if you kept it forever, I would not mind. I would actually be really interested to see 80-year-old laser corn with still orange hair. Well, you know what I would do?

Is I would dye gray into it, which I'm actually, if I do keep it, I want to go like kind of old man corn, just some gray at the temples, gradually get grayer, dye more and more gray in it. Even if my natural hair isn't gray, just like to make me look more distinguished. Okay.

Yo, I had an interesting thought the other day. What's that? So Pete and I visited his grandma's um like old folks home okay and you know it's like it's like your typical old folks home that you uh can like imagine yeah it's like sad as shit i mean you know they do old people just you know like stuff like that you know it's one of the saddest like you know it's one of the saddest things about those places is when you see just an old person eating alone at the table and you're like, Oh, Oh God. Oh, that's going to be me one day. So, but the thing is Pete and I were talking

our generation's old folks home is probably going to rock. Like, don't you think that like, there's some entrepreneur out there who's getting ready for us to be like 80 years old. Who's going to be like, okay, we're going to have yoga. There's going to be like 80 years old who's gonna be like okay we're gonna have yoga there's gonna be meditation there's gonna be like instagram corners because you know we're gonna be 80 and we're still gonna be on social media right so i feel like are we like our generation's old folks homes is gonna be like sick but you do realize that our generation isn't going to have the money for that yeah that's that's not my retirement plan. We need money. That's what Patreon is for.

Oh, Patreon for my retirement home? Yeah, pay for my retirement home. Oh, God. You have, like, Jessica Nigri. It's, like, still doing cosplay as, like, an 80-year-old. She'll still be hot, probably. Yeah. I feel like by then we're going to have robot parts anyway.

Yeah, she'll be mostly robot robot and it'll be awesome. Yeah. I just want some strong legs so I can do some hero jumps off of the third floor of a building. That's all I want. I just want big, strong robot legs. All right. Yeah. Yeah.

My retirement plan, I don't want to do an old folks home because that's putting me in a situation with more people. The older I get, the less I like people. My retirement plan is to move out to a cabin in the woods that has internet. And just like, you know. Become a murderer? No, become a murderer. The way that your destiny is.

No. I mean, if someone shows up on my property, yes. But mostly be a hermit. And just not interact with humanity as much as possible. And then, you know, my wife's like, what if you need medical attention or something? What if you fall down and can't get up? I'm like, well, then it was my time to go. And like, maybe a bear will get me because that's the coolest way to go out.

No. No, it's not the coolest way to go out. Getting eaten by a bear? Absolutely. I don't think so. Disagree, sir. Disagree. No, it's horrifying. You don't want your tombstone. Did you play Red Dead? Disagree, sir. Disagree. No, it's horrifying.

You don't want your tombstone. Didn't you play Red Dead? No, what? Yeah, that is scary. Look, it's going to be scary, but then your tombstone reads, went out fighting a bear. But wouldn't you want your tombstone to instead read, beat a bear in a wrestling match and then survive to a very long age? What?

But that would involve fighting a bear when I was younger. Like, I'm not going to win at 80. Hey, don't get down on yourself. Anything's possible. You think I could beat a bear at 80? I'm going to. Hey, thanks for believing me. I'm going to be a robot.

Oh, that's true. I'll be mostly robot. I'm going to be a cyborg. You're right. Okay, so maybe I'll win. But anyway. I want to fight you at 80. What?

Yeah, when we're mostly robots? Yeah. Yeah, I'm in. Oh, you know what we should do? Remember that me 80. What? Yeah. When we're mostly robots? Yeah. Yeah, I'm in. Oh, you know what we should do? Remember that mech we got? Yeah. Not got. The mech they let us drive?

Yeah. Dude, when we're older, we should buy ourselves some of those. Let's do it. When the price comes down. When they get a little cheaper. Yeah. Because everything gets cheaper as time goes on, right? That's right.

We have a mech battle. I am so down. Mech battle. Doing it. You want to be the MC I am so down. Mech battle. Doing it. You want to be the MC? Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

Check back with us guys in 50 years on Smosh Games for Mari versus Laser Corn mech battle. Senior. Mech battle. Senior mech battle. Mech battle. Yeah. Genial mech battle coming at you. No teeth.

All metal. Mech battle. Geriatric mech battle coming at you. No rules. No teeth. All metal. Mech battle. Geriatric mech battle. I love it. I'm so sold. Yes, geriatric mech battle. Yeah. I think we're on to something, guys.

So we won't even die in a retirement home. We'll die in the throes of a mech battle. That's how I want to go. This is even better than the bear thing. We are Gundam now.

Now my tombstone will read died in a mech battle. Yeah. And that's all I want in life. It really can't get even better than the bear thing. We are Gundam now. Now my tombstone will be dyed in a mech battle. And that's all I want in life. It really can't get any better than that. I'm actually wearing a mech robot t-shirt right now. That's awesome. It's my destiny. It was meant to be. So speaking of

old people, Mari, you're going to visit your grandma in Japan? Oh, yeah. She's turning 100 years old. That's insane. Yeah, on April 1st. But April Fool's Day doesn't exist in Japan, so there's no weird day for that. I didn't think about that.

She tricks you. She's like, I'm actually 35. Wait, how? What? That would mean I'm negative nine years old. That math doesn't. Yeah, it doesn't check out. So you're going back to Japan.

So that'll be like your one millionth time this year going to Japan. I feel like I don't even plan to go back to Japan, but it keeps calling me back. Yeah, it's going to be a cute little celebration. The mayor of the town is coming. What? She gets a little certificate from him. Mayor McCheese, of course. Congratulations, you're old as shit.

Yeah, yeah. That's what it says. Which I feel like is like just par for Japanese people. It's like, oh, you're 100. There's like 1,000 100-year-old people in Japan. But she lives way up north in Japan, which is kind of like the way south of the United States.

She's kind of like in the dirty south. If you guys know Boomhauer from King of the Hill, her Japanese accent is kind of equivalent to how Boomhauer talks, where it's like, it's so, it's got such a twang, you don't even understand what she's saying it's so cute really that's great she's a cucumber farmer

what yeah that explains why you love cucumbers that's your dream yeah to just be surrounded by cucumbers

and you can just eat all day that's what I also that that's not a gesture you want to do when you when you refer to

eating cucumbers you guys don't no no one eats cucumbers this way. You don't double fist cucumbers and then just like alternate between. He won't stop. Please stop doing it. Sorry. Those of you just listening to the podcast are spared his gesture.

Be thankful. I'm sorry. Don't watch the video. What's great is that that was just your go-to. You didn't even think about it. You know, when you're eating cucumbers. How do you guys eat cucumbers? Not with two fists.

Just raw dogging cucumbers, you know? Jesus. Yeah, that's probably why I love cucumbers so much because whenever I used to visit her, I would run into the greenhouses and just pick up cucumbers off the ground and eat them wow that's why my immune system is so healthy yeah don't you have to wash them first they're like growing the dirt I didn't and there were like these little tiny green frogs on them all the time too and they were all over the greenhouse so I I would just sit in there with all these little tiny frogs everywhere and

they'd be like all over my legs and stuff and I'd collect them and then eat cucumbers off the ground. Okay. Can I stop talking about myself? So your diet when you would visit is like half cucumber, a quarter dirt, and a quarter frog shit. Yeah. And like they're slime. Oh, no. Frog slime.

Frog slime. Like that's why I always hallucinated when I visited oh my gosh yeah just a nine year old Mari tripping out

tripping balls on a pile of cucumbers so then she's up north like you had your you had your wedding down south you've been to Tokyo you've been to Kyoto

like what's what's like your favorite kind of like area of Japan because I I take any excuse I can to go back. I've only been twice. I think I'd still say Tokyo. Tokyo is just so cool.

Been there so many times. We've explored so much of Tokyo, and there's still so many nooks and crannies that we haven't explored. But I keep hearing that Osaka is kind of like the Silver Lake or like like or like a portland or something you know like people really like care about their coffees there's a lot of young people there i haven't really seen a lot of osaka so maybe this time we will i would love to go to osaka because i've heard a lot about it but i haven't i haven't been

there that's like that town is calling you yeah yeah yeah you're hip hipsterville ian i just sink in with all with all my japanese hipsters you know yeah uh yeah i'll take any excuse to go there um because they also i know in osaka uh you know scrolling through my instagram it's it's uh mostly food and uh there's they have this like cheesecake it's like a giant Oh, that jiggly thing. Wobbly, jiggly cheesecake that I saw that they sell somewhere in Osaka. You go like this, and it's like a wobble butt. The whole thing just jiggles. Can you smack it, and it jiggles a little? Yeah.

They smack the little cheesecake AS. Yeah. And the way they make it is like- It's like a sign on the restaurant, no having sex with the cheesecake. Please. Please don't. Sir, madam. Stop American pie-ing it.

Yeah. We've seen what you Americans do to desserts. Not in our establishment. And, of course, like, it's, like, in typical, like, Japanese fashion, like, the way that they make it is incredibly precise and fast and efficient. The way that they whip it up and they pour it into these little molds. But it's perfect every time. Zero drips. It's like...

And then they come out looking amazing. And I want it so bad. Yeah, you were obsessing over it last time. You didn't get it. I know. Next time. Because we You were obsessing over it last time. You didn't get it. I know. Cause we went, we went past it cause we were in Tokyo and then we went down to, um,

Hiroshima. Ooh, that's a, that's a weird, that's a weird place. Cause like, I didn't know it was such a huge ass city. Like it was almost like,

it was almost like a middle finger to the U S to be like, Oh, like you guys decimated. Well, we're just going to make this place like three, four times bigger than it once was. It's a huge city. I had no idea. So big.

And then the buildings that got affected by the atomic bomb are still as intact as possible. And it's just so in the epicenter of the entire city. It's very sad and hopeful at the entire city it's very like sad and hopeful at the same time yeah i feel like you feel that wherever you go in the city yeah you do feel the weight of it because we we walked through that area because um there's that like domed building that was it was right below the explosion so because the explosion happens like in the air which i didn't know yeah because they detonated in the air yeah well the explosion happens in the air, which I didn't know. Yeah, because they detonate in the air. I didn't know that either. Yeah, well, the

fucked up thing is that the reason they do that is so it has a wider spread. So essentially, a nuclear bomb, it's not the blast force that is deadly, it's the heat. Because you're essentially creating a sun for one second.

So it'll burn everything but because this like domed building was directly below it the blast went straight down and the structure actually held in place so they kept that structure there as sort of like a memorial to the to the you know people wow but it's that's crazy yeah i didn't know that that's yeah i would like to go to Japan at some point, too. Check it out. Let's go. Yeah, let's do it.

I got a translator right here. Oh, man. Put me to work. I guess I did kind of use you as a translator. It's hard not to. Because I want to, like, I don't know. Order me ramen. But also, like, everybody speaks.

What's the Japanese for ramen? I mean, in the cities, like, most people understand English. Like, even if they say they don't speak English, they do. They just don't want to because they're embarrassed, I guess. They say it in perfect English. No, I don't speak any English. Really? Because that sentence sounded good.

Yeah, it's surprising. I just, I don't speak any English at all. Because didn't Kojima, like, he spoke English. He used to speak English at some of, like, the presentations. Then it wasn't, like, the best English, and he got embarrassed. So he said he wouldn't do it again. Interesting. I didn't know that.

Yeah, I didn't know that. But I will say one thing about Hiroshima, though, or Hiroshima. Okonomiyaki? Mm-hmm. Oh! What is that? Oh! Dude, it's-

Is that a weird pancake? How do you even explain it? I mean, it's... Is it a weird pancake? How do you even explain it? So it's like, I mean, it's like a savory pancake. It's, I'm going to get the ingredients wrong, but like the Hiroshima style okonomiyaki is like, you have like a base of like a batter, right? And so they make, they have this giant griddle. So they do like the batter and then they have like yakisoba,

it's like noodles, and they have like the batter and then they have like yakisoba it's like noodles and they have like a layer of that and then they you know you can do different kinds of things with it but uh what we did was like pork and then uh oysters because like oysters is a hiroshima thing um and then uh then a then like an equal kind of like flat layer of like egg. So they crack an egg, they kind of whip it up, and then they make it in the shape of like a pancake. They put that on top. And then they get like the Kewpie mayonnaise.

This does sound delicious. Like the Japanese mayonnaise. I'm getting so hungry. And then they got that black sauce. I don't know what the black sauce is. I think it's like an oyster or fish sauce. Yeah. And then they got like green onions.

And dude, it is so good. And coming back to LA, like LA pretty much has any kind of food you can think of. But not that. It's really hard to find Hiroshima style okonomiyaki because there's an Osaka style that sucks. Yeah, take that Osaka. Your style sucks. You can usually find that. You should call it Osaka. Oh, shit. Oh, my that, Osaka. Your style sucks. You can usually find that. You should call it Osaka.

Oh, shit. Oh, my gosh. Wow. Come at me. Wow. The whole city just has you plastered. This man is not invited to this city. Want it dead or alive, but mostly dead.

You started it, man. I was just hype manning you. Yeah. But I became an evangelist for Okonomiyaki after that experience. And I've been looking for it. There's maybe two places that I've found in LA that make it like that. It's hard to find it. It's not very well known. I keep thinking like, man, if people just knew, if people just knew and somebody opened a restaurant that did Okonomiyaki,

it would kill. I feel like it would kill. You know what would be a shit show? What? Doing it ourselves. We should get a flat, like teppanyaki grill. It doesn't even have to be that big.

Like, like one of those like, uh, portable ones. We can try it. Yeah, we could, yeah,

sure. We can do it. Turn it into a video. Yeah, sure. We can do it. Turn it into a video. If the restaurant fails, at least we'll get some videos out of it. Yeah, I think Binging with Babish did one. Yeah, see? We can do it.

Yeah. I never cook, by the way, so I don't know what I'm saying. Yeah. I don't know why I'm volunteering. You guys do it. Mari will supervise. She'll eat.

She'll eat it. So if the viewers or listeners happen to come across Hiroshima-style okonomiyaki, I say definitely, definitely give it a shot. And if you're of drinking age, it's nice paired with a little lager. A little beer? Yeah, a little Sapporo action. I like a nice ginger beer. I don't know why you would ruin the taste with a

beer you're ruining the taste of ginger oh ginger's the best it's so good for your tongue too ginger beer is good did you did you grow up eating ginger though yeah yes yeah i did japanese yeah i like ginger dressing on salad you are a ginger too right now i am that's very true you like yourself yeah i just want to pour myself all over some salad whoa okay that's a true you like yourself yeah I just want to pour myself all over some salad whoa okay that's a little bit

yeah that's a little far redacted redacted you can't just say redacted it works yeah it's like declaring

bankruptcy it's the same thing yeah what's like the like what do you think is like the coolest place or like what's a place that you would recommend people go to because you've obviously mar you've been to so many places

in the past couple years like what would like what's what's like okay so what's a place for like if you're just looking for a chill vacation or a place for like exploring um you, if you live in the United States and you don't have a passport yet and you're kind of like don't want to go through the whole hoopla of all that stuff, go to Hawaii. I feel like Hawaii feels like it's halfway around the

world. Because it is. I mean, from California it's not that far. It's like four hours from California. That's not bad. No It's like four hours from California. Oh, that's not bad. No. But it feels like you're in a completely like jungly, different, exotic, gorgeous place. And then your phone works, your money works, your language works. So if you're a U.S. American, I would say Hawaii is like your best shot of like feeling uh, feeling like you're really far away without

having to have to put that much work into the process. Just don't do Oahu. Too many people. Too many people. Yeah. Maui was awesome. Yeah. Maui was dope.

And then Kauai was dope. Yeah. Yeah. We picked the good islands. I know, dude. Yeah. I went, I went to Oahu after and it's like it's fine like there's like awesome there's definitely awesome stuff there the food's great but there's just so many people

and it's like you go to like this like place it should be an island paradise and then you like step out onto the street and it's just always people and you're like this isn't a paradise this is just the this feels like I'm walking through a mall. Tourists. Constantly. Because there's a lot of just people who actually live there. Right? It's just a big city.

Yeah, Honolulu is a pretty big spat. Yeah, Hawaii just seems like when you're thinking about a vacation, to me it always just seemed like kind of a cop out because it is so easy. And you're like, I guess we're going to go to Hawaii. Like not that it's a bad thing. Like Hawaii is amazing. But I don't know. Like I want to I want to go somewhere.

I want to go somewhere like cooler. But also I'm kind of lazy and I don't want to. I don't know. I'm also a little afraid of going to a place where English isn't like the main language. Because that just gives me too much anxiety. I feel like the thing is, like, it is such a privilege to know English because it is really the language that is spoken everywhere around the world. Like there is still basic English pretty much anywhere that normal tourists go. And I feel like in so many ways, like I don't know how that became the thing around the world.

Colonialism? Yeah, it's just like it was like bullied almost where it's just like, what do you mean you don't know English? You better learn it. And it's like, why? We're in Honduras. It's like this thing. But I've realized wherever I am in the world, people know English.

It's such a privilege to know it. So it's good to be reminded of it and be grateful for it and just to understand that like you can go anywhere and say it but at the same time it's really important to be mindful of like oh this is not the prime language i should at least know how to say thank you please and i'm sorry right yeah so it's travels good opens up your eyes yeah yeah for sure yeah but you've been you've always been traveling like even before even before youtube like you you like climbed mount kilimanjaro

you were doing like ice climbing you were running away from a possible attacker and was that peru in the dark of the night but that was literally months before we first met. Yeah. And I think, you know, it's one of these things where it's like, we'll never know. But I do feel like I was more of an interesting person because I traveled. Like, I feel like, you know, that first worst audition ever, you know, like I went into it not knowing what the heck I was doing. Yeah. So for the people listening that didn't see this, this was a video that Anthony and I made where we were auditioning people for

Smosh Pit Weekly, which was the first video that wasn't going to feature us. And Mari was one of the people that was in the audition. Sorry, go ahead. Yeah. It was random questions, right?

Like what's your favorite Pokemon? What would you bring to the end of the world? What's the weirdest thing you've eaten? And like, I feel like I wouldn't have been like a well-rounded worldly interesting person to to have anything to bring to the table had i not traveled um well because yeah because you said the the weirdest thing you ate was guinea pig yeah and we're like what and i'm like oh yeah and i know that you have one um but yeah i think that's why i have one. But, yeah, I think that's one of the reasons.

And I have some barbecue sauce. Let's get this party started. Some guinea pig on the barbie. But, yeah, I think that's one of the reasons why I encourage people to travel because I'm like, I don't know if I would have, like, you know, hit it off with you guys had I just not been, like, outside of, like, myself. You know what I mean? Like, understood what it's like to just live.

And so, you know, when I hear, like, my nephews, my seven and nine-year-old nephews being like, oh, I just want to be a YouTuber when I grow up. And I'm like, be interesting first. Like, be a person. Oh, yeah, absolutely. You know, be a whole person so that you have something to bring to the table.

Yeah. So that you don't go on a podcast and you're like, oh, I don't have any experiences. You know, it's like, damn. This one time in Fortnite. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I got a triple kill.

I think you're totally hitting on something because I think it is important to see how other people live and understand, like the most, the most important part of being human is, is, is seeing, is being able to place yourself in other people's shoes and understand that everyone has a different experience. And unless you go out there and see it for yourself, you might be missing,

you know, at the same time though, not everyone has the means to travel. Absolutely. Yeah. And I would also, I would also like recommend that people that are living in the U.S. actually see other places in the U.S.

because it's a huge country. We shouldn't be one country. We are not a country of one kind of people. For sure. You go around the U.S. and you will see very different people. So Ian just said that we should not be one country which means we should all succeed inciting revolution yes so if anyone out there any government agency is looking for people doing that this guy don't put me on a list and remember i'm

on this end of the table not associated with such a leader you would be such a revolutionary you're like i don't know what i want but i just wanted to be called laser cornea who's with me it's like does this mean we get machetes yeah it's like look i have nothing to do with this revolution it's like why is everything behind you on fire i that was there when i got there this is uh fire city so i don't know what you're talking about you can see the sign that i didn't just make now that says fire city yeah so it's been fire city for a while i think it was like zelda breath of the wild just everything is torched and lava'd you would live there but i think that i think that is super important um but yeah you're totally right there there's a money there's a money barrier for sure you know luckily there's

there's ways to cut costs on travel. There's hostels. I never did. I did the hostel thing. Yeah. Yeah. You have to kind of like keep your wits about you. But you, gosh, there are some interesting people. I stayed in a hostel in the ski town in France called Chamonix.

And like everyone there was an expat. Like they used to live in the United States. They had like families, jobs, corporate jobs. They had like normal lives over here. And then they're like, one day I just up and left everything. And I've been here for 25 years. I'm like, whoa, what do you do every day? And they're like, well, I just ski on the mountain. That's a little bit of a privileged situation. Yeah. Not everybody can just. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, and then it's also like, oh, by the way, I have a rich dad. Yeah. It's weird. It's interesting. But there's certainly a way. There's a way to do it. But I do think it's a little, a lot of like Europeans criticize Americans for not traveling.

And it's like, you realize there's this thing called the ocean. Yeah. So you guys take a train and there's this thing called the ocean. Yeah. So you guys take a train and you're in a completely different culture. Yeah. Which I think is, it's very cool. It's so cool. It's so cool. If anything, don't do what I did and spend your entire savings on traveling,

which is one of the reasons why I was taking so many jobs, which is probably how I ended up taking like a Smosh gig in the first place. Because I was just like oh my gosh I have nothing in my savings account I need a job yeah I better just take anything well that worked out it worked out in a way where it was never expected which I think is like

I don't know so cool so for everyone listening all you have to do is spend all your money on travel and it all works out and it all works out you And it'll all work out. You'll get picked up by a YouTube channel, and you'll get brand deals, and you'll be just fine. Terrible advice.

That's my job here is to give terrible advice. It wouldn't be the Smosh cast if I didn't. Do you guys have any weird stories? What's the weirdest story between you two? That involves both of us? Yeah i have one and this is pretty recent okay this is i feel like this story highlights you in the best possible way and i feel like it wraps up you um perfectly so it was um your wife's birthday it was a surprise party that you very successfully pulled off for her. And it was silent disco, which means that you wear headphones like this. And there's a DJ playing only music into your headphones and no other music is going on. And so if you take it off, there's just no music. And if you put it back on, there's headphones. Everyone listens to the same song. And so you kind of dance around when you want to. And if you have the headphones off, everyone looks crazy.

Yeah, exactly. Everyone really does look super crazy if you don't have it on. Okay. So I look over, there's two channels on your headsets. You can either be on the blue channel or the green channel, and they have, like, different songs on each. What? And so I go over and get some snacks or something, and I come back and I look at this ocean of people. Everyone's dancing and having a great time.

It's really, really cool. Everyone's got their headphones on. And, like, everyone's bopping, like, kind of at the same time. Everyone has blue headphones and the one person in the ocean of people with green headphones is this guy i made the playlist on the green channel bopping to the same rhythm as everyone else when i clearly know that you're not listening to the same song i can't dance i just i just mimic what other people are doing i just feel like that's how you go through life you're like yeah i'm having the

same conversation as you and it's like we're having a different conversation wow i love it uh yeah i mean the story that immediately comes to mind for me is Mari's various injuries. She was in a hamster ball and wearing a GoPro and somehow managed to smack herself in the face with the GoPro. Explain how this happened. It's a giant human hamster ball

that is blown up and you are able to step inside of it and roll in it. I don't know. You guys probably had the brilliant idea to put a GoPro on my head. And I did it too. Well, we needed the first person view. Yeah, the first person view. But everyone else did it and was fine.

Okay. Well, I have a very small head. I have like a toddler size head. My seven-year-old nephew's beanie fits on my head. So I have a very small head i have like a toddler size head my six year my my seven year old nephew's beanie fits on my head so i have a very small head i don't know why i don't have a back of a head but it's just it's like it's a straight line from my neck and then it's my face it's like a like a like a letter d anyway it slid down right to the bridge of my nose. And in that moment, the monstrosity that Wes is. Oh, yeah.

This is Wes's fault? I don't know. I knew it. I don't know why he shoulder checked it from the back. But that sent me flying into the front. And then I nearly broke my nose. Yeah. Well, you had a big ass cut on your nose, right?

Yeah. I had to Nelly it for like a week and a half. I had a Band-Aid on my face. Yeah. No, that was a cool look. You were gangster. I kind of liked it, too. And then that night, there was a bunch of us partying at Joven and Wes's place.

And we stayed up very, very, very, very, very, very late. Yep. And you were hanging out just kind of being like chaperone to all the kids. Yep. The kids being us. And then you went home. Like, I don't think you slept. Yeah, I got on a flight that morning.

And you went back home and you didn't feel right, right? Yeah. So you went to the doctor. I forgot about this. So you can tell this story because this is your story. Okay, Okay. So I went to the ER because I was having headaches. And I do like a CAT scan or CT scan or whatever you do for your head. And the doctor says, gosh, did you go to sleep last night because you have a mild concussion?

And I said, no, actually, my friends kept me awake all night because they were up. And he's like, well, your friends saved your life. And in my head, I'm like, my dumb friends are partying. I distinctly remember you and Joven were wrapped in blankets on the corner, like, on, like, the corner, like, sofa. I think I was just, like, looking from afar. I'm like, are you guys okay? Like, I was just playing mom all night. But then to hear this doctor be like, your friends saved your life.

As if this, like, is, like, angelic thing happening. Some altruistic thing they were doing when they were just trying to have a good time. Yeah, you're just being idiots. Yeah. See, partying saves lives good time. Yeah, you're just being idiots. See, partying saves lives. Oh my god, again with the terrible, terrible information. And also, don't play

hamster balls with Wes, because he could kill you. Giant hamster ball. I feel like he's this sweet boy, and then all of a sudden he has a fit of anger and he's like, and he holds out and he's like let's shoulder check this 100 pound girl in a hamster ball yeah i'm still friends with these people good times gosh i forgot that that's the part two of that story i totally forgot yeah yeah that you almost oh yeah the part where you almost died yeah that's the moral of the story if you think you have a concussion, don't go to sleep that night.

Not partying saves lives. You're not. No. Why can't both be true? Fine, fine. It's both. I thought I read that you're not more likely to die if you're asleep. You're just more likely to die and no one notice.

Well, like, if you, I forget what I read, but it's like if you enter a state where you're like you're, you are going to die from your concussion. Like if you're awake, people will notice. They'll be like, hey, why did you suddenly slump over? But if you're asleep, you just keep being asleep. Yeah. So it's like people actually notice. So yeah, that's why they tell you stay awake, I think. Or it could be totally wrong.

Someone fact check me. I'd love to be wrong. Any neurologists out there, hit us up. And if any questions about space, Mari can answer them. Yeah. With the help of Wikipedia. Kevipedia. There's over 72 stars in space too, right?

That's true. And one of them is named after you. Lasercorn? Yep. There's a lasercorn star? Yeah. not it oh there isn't but i figured why would you lie about space oh i was trying to gauge your excitement because if you're really excited i would buy it for your birthday but moral combat comes out on your birthday i think so that'll be my gift for you. Nope, I need a laser corn star. I'm making it happen. And just so you guys know, speaking of Mortal Kombat,

we got early access to Mortal Kombat 11. E-Revon. So we're gonna be playing it before anyone else does. We got an exclusive new look. So pretty excited about that. Thank you, WB Games. Yeah, thank you. So please, if you're not yet subscribed to Smosh Games,

please do that. And for the heck of it, just watch a bunch of videos. Just get back up to speed. You know, it's a new life for Smosh Games. I'm very, very, very excited. One of the sort of big things with Smosh games, I'm very, very, very excited. Um, one of the, one of the sort of big things with, with Smosh games was when, when the whole like defy thing happened, um, we were sort of, cause like I, I sort of became a little bit separated from Smosh games, like towards the

end with, with defy, it was just like, I was so heavily focused on like main channel and i didn't realize like all of the fuckery shall we say that defy had with with smosh games and one of one of defy's like sort of um like one of their one of their uh plans oh plan for like their idea of and this actually kind of also went for Smosh as well. But they were like, we just need young, hot people to be on these channels. And we'll just get rid of all the old people because they treated it like Disney. That's rough. And that's not how the internet works. Yeah, that worked out really well for that SourceFed channel. Oh, man. when they just got rid

of everyone and replaced them with uh now this nerd yeah that was that it went over really well i saw they deleted that i think they deleted that because it was too much of an embarrassment yeah so like defy you know in in so many words was not not necessarily forcing you know the OGs out, but they weren't making it easy for you guys to stay around. And I was only so much aware of this because I was just fully focused on the main channel creative stuff. I didn't realize how much, you know, bad stuff was happening over there. So when, you know, when Defy, you know, collapsed and I started talking to all you guys, I was because like with Smosh Main, it was very obvious what we're going to do. We're just going to keep going at it.

But then I started talking to all you guys. I was like, oh, this happened. This happened. This happened. Oh, my God, this is fucked. Yeah. this happen? This happened? Oh my God, this is fucked. And so like, you know, my, one of my priorities was like Smosh and Smosh games shouldn't be like a separate thing. Like it should just be Smosh. Like there shouldn't be a reason why we look at Smosh and Smosh games as any different. You know, it's just us playing games over here. Like there shouldn't be so much of a separation.

That's, that's what I want to do going forward going forward you know we're just a big old family you're gonna see new faces you're gonna see old faces you're gonna see you know people you don't normally see on smosh games from like main smosh and some videos on smosh games and vice versa it's just gonna be a big old family and i think that's what it should have been in the first place. And that's what it was in the first place, but it just got kind of more separated. Yeah. I feel like a company that isn't working with us day in and day out, like the people who ran that company barely saw us. Yeah. And so I feel like they were able to see it in a really cold way where it was like, let's separate these into two different groups because it's easier to market.

It's easier to brand. It's easier to talk to somebody who doesn't know these people and say these people are in this group and this is in this group. And so that's why it was separated out because it was seen as a really heartless sort of thing where you can just kind of tie it up in a neat little bow. But I think we've all realized that we're so well-rounded and so like differently talented. And there's no reason why any of us should have to stick to one thing or another. It's the reason why all of us are here is because we're so multifaceted. You know, it's like Lazercorn plays video games, but he also writes, and he has scripts, and, like, he has different passions, and, like,

and he's also able to edit, and he's able to, you know, like, create, like, a voice through edits, and I don't know. I think it comes from the fact that we've all had these, like, really weird, windy roads to get here, but a company like Defy really wanted to just keep us

in a box and say, well, that doesn't belong over there, so you can't even do it. Yeah. Yeah, one of the most fun videos we did was when Shane came and did Nick Cage joins Grand Theft Smosh. Yeah. Which was awesome and hilarious, and he did, through the entire video

this really funny Nicolas Cage impression and acted like him and stuff and was over the top. And at the end, we're like, man, that was awesome. We should do more of this. You know, like Smosh and Smosh Games collaborations. And then just like it never happened.

Like we had trouble getting him for stuff. And I understand he was busy with other stuff, but I'm like, there should be more, you know, more crossover. Yeah, I totally agree. And, I mean, it just makes sense. Like, when awesome stuff like that happens, like, yeah, we have the opportunity to do that, and we just need to take advantage of that. I mean, it must be really cool for you having, like, a fresh new beginning. I mean, you've been at this from the start.

You've seen it from, you know, something that you never expected to turn into this beast. Yeah. And now you get to do whatever you want with it. Well, not whatever I want, but for the most part, if it makes sense, you know, I can't just be like, well, tomorrow we're going to transition Smosh to a cruise line live show. And we're just going to be doing shows on cruises. Wow. Not that I would want to do that because I don't. We would have an opening number.

I've always wanted an opening number. We'll get you an opening number. Yeah, you keep trying to pitch us on this opening number thing. I was like, you would love it. You would have a tap number and then you'd have like a quick change. Her name is Maria. Taka Hashi. Marie.

Taka Hashi. Taka Hashi. I remember you saying you wanted to do a podcast like months ago, and now you got it. Yeah. It didn't make sense at Defy. It just never felt right. And this, to me, like the podcast to me now is just so important with what we're doing

and just being able to, you know, open, open the listeners and the viewers up to our lives and, and what the whole situation is. Because the big like separation for me is like, you know, only see what's what's on camera or like what's in the sketches but they don't see like the family actually at work and like together and they don't understand like the relationships that everyone has like it's an awesome place to be and we just haven't been able to show people that part of it. So this was kind of like the opportunity to open that window and get people a little closer to us. Also having this candor, right? Because like, this is the way we talk to each other normally without cameras, but you know, the content that

we've always made, as soon as there's a camera, we, there's this need for it to be like punchy and, you know, over the top and like really exciting and something that we visualize will be like a really good video and i think we all want that and that's why we become these like personas of ourselves but i think it's really wonderful that the audience gets to see a different side which is the way we talk to each other normally which is like not up here oh my god up here but like like this is But like, this is the regular tone and the candor. And I think that our conversations go from like hilarious to deep all the time.

And so I think it's really cool to be able to share that. And it's cool to just show people like you don't have to be like a crazy character to be like interesting like just be yourself and that's and that's interesting enough like just be like honest and true to who you are and and you know people appreciate that that's the takeaway that's the 15 second clip and party to save lives yeah you just I'm sorry I can't I can't. I can't. See, like, I have an issue. And I have an issue with, like, you know.

You're cynical. When I'm, like, serious about things, like, then I just have to ruin it with a stupid-ass joke. Is it a joke, though, if it works? If lives are saved? That does it for this week. If you're not yet subscribed to the Smoshcast on any of your favorite podcast apps, please do that. And if you are subscribed to this on YouTube, thank you so much. You can see our faces.

That's pretty cool. But if you want to hear it first, you got to hear it on the podcast apps. And then it comes out Friday for YouTube. Also, Smosh Games is coming back April 10th, baby. We're going to be doing a little tour showing you guys around the space. Smosh Games is coming back April 10th, baby. Woo-hoo! We're going to be doing a little tour, showing you guys around the space, and then we're playing some Mortal Kombat 11.

Darn, darn, darn, darn. Mortal Kombat! No, no, no, no. We're going to get copyright strike for that. Oh, yeah, because that was perfectly on pitch. Yeah. Even the algorithm's like, no, not that one. That one's fine. So Mortal Kombat video will be coming out on the 13th

so subscribe to Smosh Games there's going to be a lot more content coming out there we're going to be in it more myself, Courtney, Shane, Damien you're coming back I'm coming back so it'll be a lot of fun

thank you guys so much for coming i can't wait to do more things with you guys i'm so excited welcome back caught it no mine stop it