Smosh Mouth - S1: #9 - Shagging on the Beach w/ Rhett & Link

Episode Date: April 17, 2019

Ian, joined by Damien and Rhett & Link, talk about what it’s really like working at the Mythical/Smosh offices, those viral suicidal walruses, and why Link’s dad loves a good shag on the beach. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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If you have questions or concerns about gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Ramble. Apparently, like, climate change is making walruses commit suicide. They're making them, like, jump off cliffs, and I was

like, heh. There is this weird thing that happens when you know every week you're going to be talking for at least an hour. That you start to save things. Like, we save conversations for our podcast. One day we were all just sitting around and we noticed this horrific smell, but it was more like this might be toxic for us. And they were air frying shoes. Link, like a Ruby Tuesday's waiter, Link has a tendency to bring a

little flare to things. And when you bring flare to knives, people get hurt. So your dad could make a pretty good cult leader, then. He could, yeah. He's spending more time down there in Myrtle Beach, doing some Doing some shagging. Oh. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 9, 7, 6, 5, 4, 1, 2, 7, 9, 8, 6, 5, 4. Wow, you know all those numbers? Even in that order, yeah. Oh, my God. Welcome back to another Smoshcast, guys. We have three very lovely people here today, which is one

more than we normally have. Today, we are joined by Damien of Smosh and Rhett and Link of Rhett and Link. What up? Hello! Glorious to be here. This is the first time we've met. I'm so excited.

This is the third time we've met this morning, actually. It's a big building. Yeah. Very, very large, very large building we live in. We were thinking it was like a Wizard of Oz situation where Stevie would just come out and be the talking head and there was no Rhett and Link. Well, that would be the case, but she's on vacation. Oh, well, congrats to her. I just said congrats.

Congrats. Congrats to her. It's early. Did we make you do this earlier than you normally do? That was our request. We got to do it early. It was one hour earlier, which is just totally throwing my game off, man. No, this is great.

For those of you that don't know, I guess we'll just go through this really quickly. Rhett and Link are the ones that save Smosh. So, you know, it took you guys long enough to get on our pod. Jeez. Well, we didn't want people to think it would be a regular thing. Yeah, that's true. We want to be on every one of your podcasts. You just start showing up in all of our videos.

It just becomes the red link show. We didn't want to scare your audience. Yeah. No, that's understandable. I appreciate that. But now that we're here, we are taking over. Oh, okay. That's fine.

You guys definitely have much more podcasting experience than us. You guys have been doing it for how long? I don't know. I mean, the first first there was a big break first ear biscuit was probably at the same time maybe five years ago six years ago oh yeah maybe so wow so that was like that was like the second wave of podcasting because i feel like yeah there's people that started podcasting like back when it was like early internet and people were like i don't know i'm just doing this like podcast thing and it was a joke and then and then like there's like a second wave and then that's like when everybody decided they were going to sort of do a podcast but they didn't really know what they wanted to do and i feel like it kind of fell off and then now we're

kind of in this like third wave yeah of like podcasting where everybody now has a podcast and i think everyone's starting to definitely understand as like a listener, like what podcasts are. And like, now there's people that are taking more seriously and they're getting more into like, you know, scripted type stuff.

It's almost, I almost wonder if it's going to sort of like do like a full loop, like back around to like how like radio used to be where like they had like war of the worlds and like full stories. I'm sure'm sure teleplay action yeah yeah do you have you listened to any of those like any of the scripted podcasts no a lot of auditions roll through on like the voice acting and like it's been it's been maybe a year now that they're just constantly coming in for things like that and they're incredibly. They'll have like a page of character description. It's interesting.

I think you're right on that's the way it's going for sure. Yeah. But, I mean, I'm stoked. I was way late into the podcast game. I think the first podcast I ever listened to was like two years ago. Wow. Because I just like, I don't know. Because I equated podcasts to like audio books,

and I just wasn't into that yeah but then i started listening i was like oh wait this is actually kind of fun and i just really enjoyed the podcast where people are just like having a conversation yeah the second the second wave you're talking about that's when some youtubers started doing podcasts right and now there's there's a lot more of that. And I think it's great. I think it gets, you know, I'm excited for you guys to have started one because it gives an added dimension

to the way that you can communicate with your audience that you haven't been able to do on the other channels, you know? Right, totally. I think it's great. I listen to it. Yeah. Thank you. I'll definitely listen to's great. I'll listen to it. Yeah.

Thank you. I'll definitely listen to this one. I'm listening to it right now as I commute in. You should just try to recite every single word that you say. Just be driving the car with your kids and your wife and just start saying every line. That'd be fun. You'll like this part.

Hold up, listen, listen, listen. This is the one. My wife started listening to our podcast once she realized from friends reporting to her that I talk about her on it. Oh. So there's like a policing factor. I'm afraid that like if I, like once I start, that maybe I'll say something about like a date that I went on. And then maybe that person will find out about the podcast and then they'll hear it. And then

I'll get busted for saying something. That's my, that's my fear. Or she'll be like, he's thinking about me at work. That's so sweet. And talking about me openly and seemingly critically. Yeah. You got to watch yourself, but you're, yeah, you're going to have to figure out at what point in a relationship do you say, listen, this is all going on my podcast. I'm exploiting all of this. Yeah. Well, we regularly get like old friends.

If we tell a story, we get old friends who text us and tell us all the details that we got wrong. Wow. Or if I'm telling a story now about any one of my friends, somehow it will get back to them. So now I'm like, every time, and we don't talk negatively about anybody. But if you just kind of like, in fact,

so we've talked about my friend Ralph and how he kind of like, he kind of abandoned me on the top of the mountain at Mammoth, but it was really, I told him to go down and I was going to take a different way. And then my other friend, Tim, texted him and was like, Ralph is a horrible friend. He was serious.

I'm like, no, he's not. Did I tell that story in a way that made him seem like a horrible friend! He was serious. I thought that was hilarious. No he's not. Did I tell that story in a way that made him seem like a horrible friend? I thought I put it all on me. No, you kind of painted him to be the guy who abandoned you at the top of the mountain when you had zero skills to get down. I told him to go down. I told him to go down the mountain. But like, he didn't argue about it though. He was like halfway down and was like, you got it, man!

He put up a little bit of a fight, but you can't give all those details. Of course, of course. He is a horrible friend. I'll just take the brunt of it. I can say with almost utmost certainty that none of my friends listen to my podcast. And I'm pretty sure nobody listens to this podcast. Talk about him more. So we can start talking about him.

Talk trash about him. Talk about it loudly in a Starbucks. Let's see. I'm trying to think of a... Rass, you suck. All right. I wouldn't talk directly to him. Oh, okay.

I mean, I know you didn't ask me. Okay, so there's this friend of mine, Rass. He sucks. Yeah. That's it. Okay. That's it. I'll wait for that response.

But there is this There is this weird thing that happens When you know every week You're gonna be talking For at least an hour That you start to save things Like we save conversations for our podcast Interesting

But I mean Have you started doing that Where it's like You're just kind of living your life And you're like Okay this is something That I could either talk out now with somebody or at least make mental notes of, oh, I'm going to bring that to the Smosh cast. A little bit.

I've never, wait, are you saying that you straight up will stop a conversation? Oh, wait, wait, wait. Save it. All the time. Yeah. Really? Yeah. And it's also the fact that it's the, you know, our...

Ear Biscuits is always the two of us. Like, it used to be guest-based, but now every week it's just the two of us. And a lot of times it's stuff that we're experiencing or... Anytime we both go on separate trips anywhere, you cannot talk about it. Like, we don't speak during the week that we're gone. Or when we get back. There's no details. You get back, it's like, how was your trip?

You can give one-word answers. Good. Okay. I don't even think we ask off-mic anything about each other. I mean, that's the extreme, right? That's what may happen to us. That's so funny. Our entire relationship is conducted on mic. Well, I mean.

It doesn't happen, but it could happen. I think we're constantly filtering, like, is this Ear Biscuits worthy? If it is, I won't talk about it. Is this, like, not interesting enough or too, you know, private or whatever? Those things are for the real world. So the only thing we talk about are boring private things. You know, anything that's interesting has been relegated to the podcast.

But you are gonna have to figure out... How does it affect your relationship? I mean, those type of boundaries. Like, you think about relationships and... Really, at what point do you say... I mean, I wouldn't say, like, on your dating profile, which, you know, we've been working on together. Oh, you've been working on my dating profile?

We have been. Oh, great. Well working on my dating profile? We have been. Oh, great. Well, it's probably the same time that you, it's probably the same threshold as when you bring somebody onto your social media, right? I mean, I would think it was the same time. Like, what's the policy there these days? I mean, obviously, we got married before social media,

so we don't, we didn't have to navigate these waters. That's nice. If ever I'm on like a dating app thing, I don't connect my Instagram or whatever because I would feel extremely uncomfortable if someone was like, oh, he's a YouTuber. Yeah, you can't. I don't want to attract the type of person that that interests, you know. Oh, okay. For the sake, I don't know. Just the follower number thing gets stars in certain people's eyes, I think,

and I don't want that at all. Well, and especially if you start... You don't want that right now. Not right now. Maybe in a couple weeks. The relationships that start between online personalities. It's like, okay, so when Grace and Elliot started dating, like, what, a couple months ago,

it was like that first post. The first post that didn't say anything official. It was just suggested something. You knew they were in a relationship because they're thinking about this very carefully. Yeah, that's Grace Helbig and Elliot Morgan. Yeah. Yeah, sorry.

Yeah, for those of you who aren't on the inside of the hive mind of YouTube. But yeah, that's a big announcement. And that was something that I had to really think about when, when I was in a relationship, I think, you know, with, with one of my long-term relationships, I was very guarded. I didn't really say anything really about, about my relationship. Like I wasn't like hiding her away, but it was like, I don't know how much of my, of my, you of my private life I really want to put out there. And then with the relationship after that, I was a little more open because she was also a sort of online personality. So it was kind of that timing thing where it's like, okay, are we good? We're good. All right, we're going to tell everyone.

We're just going to lay it out there for the internet. We're going to make it known. And then that'll be that. And every person is going to be super chill about it and not badger. Well, I mean, with, I wasn't so much of the heartthrob. So it actually wasn't, it wasn't as bad for me because I didn't have like as many sort of like, you know, people that had like a fantasy of, of dating me. This is the thing that made it not happen. Damn it.

So my announcement wasn't so bad. Got it. Was it an announcement? Yeah. Like? Yeah. On what? Instagram?

On like Instagram and I think maybe also cross-posted to Twitter. Okay. Because you just have to, you know, you want to cut through the bullshit. You want to just like, say like, this is what it is. Stop speculating. No,

Anthony and I are never, we're never going to get married. So just like, give that up. We're still dealing with that. Oh, you too? Yeah.

Well, you know, I look, and I addressed it in that, in that announcement. announcement i said look like if you want to write fan fictions that's fine you know be creative that's great if if it's sort of this creative endeavor that you're doing i think that's great but when when you start like coming at us like like you you guys are meant to be together and like with like you know really it's that when

you cross that boundary of like fiction to like what you like want the person to be in real life yeah then that's when it gets a little dicey and i'm like it's not gonna happen in real life like that's fine you can write those fan fictions and that's great and everything but like when when you start trying to interfere with our real lives, then that, then that sort of crosses the line. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

It's like, at what point do you, at what point are you like character and like online personality? And at what point are you a real person? And that's difficult about YouTube because you are kind of both all the time. And I think some people just can't really separate that. Yeah. So like 5% Anthony chance? I don't know.

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm just curious. Let's put it at like, yeah, let's put it at like a 3%. Cool. 3%. There's hope. I'd say we've got like a, we're basically married. Yeah.

I mean, we have a, it's just a different type of marriage. Yeah. I've got like a, I got a wife and then I've got a friend... I don't wanna say it. Say it! A friends-bend? A friends-bend! Friends-bend, I like it. We're like an old married couple. I mean, that's really how it is. I mean, when you've been together this long, you no longer have a choice.

Sure. You're just riding it out. And you no longer have a choice. Sure. You're just riding it out. And you no longer have sex with each other. Right. You know what I'm saying? So it is a lot like an old married couple. Right, right. There's no sexual intimacy.

Same room, but separate beds. You're sleeping in separate beds. Right. You argue all the time, but you're kind of in it together. Yeah. And you never go to bed. For the children. Matt, what's up?

For the children. Yeah. Yeah, we stay together for the internet, kids. Yeah. Did you just sniff a lemon What I didn't see what you did But it looked yellow You know Ian

I took a I took a drink Of my iced Americano Yeah they're out of They're out of cold brew At my At my favorite Ice

At my favorite Coffee shop Why did you think It was a lemon It seemed yellow to me Is it not yellow I think it was a light I think it was It's not yellow at all Why did you think it was a lemon? It seemed yellow to me. What? Is it not yellow? I think it was a little light.

I think it's not yellow at all. No, you know what it was? It was out of the corner of my eye, I saw your index finger. And I think you kind of have a Simpson-esque complexion a little bit. I'm very yellow. A little jaundiced. You feeling all right?

You should definitely get your liver checked. I haven't seen sun in three years. Is it weird? Just bending over, sniffing a lemon. checked. I haven't seen sun in three years. Is it weird? Just bending over, sniffing a lemon. Yeah. That's what I'd like to believe. Well, that's fine. You can believe what you want.

I'm back, guys. Very weird kind of addiction for Ian. At least he hasn't gone down a dark path. I mean, you know, I'm not an expert podcaster, but I thought that's what every podcast is. They just had a lemon on the side. You don't sniff lemons? What? You don't, you guys don a lemon on the side. They squirted lemons. What?

You don't, you don't, you guys don't lemon? Amateurs. Weird. It's, so it must be, it must be kind of weird to sit here

because this is the exact same place where you guys record your ear biscuits. What? Except we just threw a blue tablecloth over the table and put up a black curtain. When was, was that revealed on the revealed on the first Moshcast? I don't think we ever mentioned it.

Nope. This is it, Rhett. So now's the time when you tell us that's not cool to do and we just cut it out. No, I think people probably have figured, right? Yeah. Same mics, but you've got the sneeze guard up, which was our request, it seems like.

It's like, why would it be, why would you want this? It seems like, yeah, they can use our mics, but you've got the sneeze guard up, which was our request, it seems like. It's like, why would it be, why would you want this? It seems like, yeah, they can use our mics, but, you know, put up a sneeze guard. Well, it's... That's not what we said, but we didn't say anything. You implied it. Oh, sure. It seems like we did. You guys don't have the pop filter when you record?

Oh. Well, I do a lot of P's. Oof. I do a lot of P's and K's. Yeah. So, I'm sorry. As a rule, I do a lot of P's. Oof. I do a lot of P's and K's. Yeah. So, I'm sorry. As a rule, we don't have any P's

in the podcast. Yeah. That's the easy way around. You're a pucker. What do you call it? A pucker. Pecker. We just kind of take it out.

It's just... Pecker. Oddcast. Yeah. Oddcast. What's oddcast? Oh, God. If oddcast isn't taken yet,

can I just go ahead and take that? That's actually really smart. You can do your own We'll need a different color tablecloth Great there's so many left I feel like we need to be like something like Rhett's shirt Like something very psychedelic

I'm sure the odd cast The odd cast probably does exist Multiple times and they probably all suck That's true This could be our chance to do it right The chance is that it doesn't exist or it does exist and it's also a good podcast, very, very slim. Yeah.

What do you think the worst podcast is out there? Do you think there's just like... I want to hear the worst podcast that has ever been recorded. What do you think that even is? Because I mean, I guess there's people who, like, even if you just explore, it's hard to find the worst. Yeah. You know, because how's the worst going to rise to the top?

I can't say I've listened to any horrible podcasts, but... I feel like eventually there's got to be, like, a The Room of podcasts. You know what I mean? Like, there's got to be a podcast that room of podcasts you know what i mean like there's got to be a podcast that's so bad that it gets a cult following because there's a reddit thread about this because there's a reddit thread you know the deep into youtube reddit thread which uh link turned me on to which finds just did it turn you on? Horrible. Well, sometimes. Every seventh or eighth post. But it finds things that, it'll be like, 2006, this video is called Fred Finds His Cat, One View.

Wow. And then it's just constantly, and then every once in a while, you're just like, I love that kind of stuff. Yeah. So someone needs to do that with podcasts. They should. It's harder to get the idea of a podcast in the same way you can quickly gather

the concept of a YouTube video and be like, am I going to commit half an hour to figure out if this is really the room of podcasts? Yes, yeah. It's probably a bad idea. I guess also there is like with YouTube videos, there's a certain like amateurness to like the way it's filmed that, that adds to the allure of a video that has like one view,

you know what I mean? Like, uh, like there was some video, I think, I think Bo Burnham was saying he likes to just find like really obscure YouTube videos that have like two views. Like remember that one video that blew up?

Like there was some kid where he was celebrating getting a second subscriber or something like that. Oh, I remember seeing something. And then like obviously Reddit found the kid and they blew him up and he got thousands of subscribers. Oh, that's great. And he was like freaking out. That's a good power of the internet right there.

Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes Reddit comes in. We did that for a while. What was the – we had a segment. Yeah, the wheel, the wheel would land on something.

Isn't it that hashtag, like the non-used hashtag? Like you find it. Well, we did that. Yeah. Where we, it would be creating a new hashtag

or a hashtag that had been used like one time. Right. But we did something where you just find a video and then we would send everybody to that video and we were like, you can't tell them that we sent you. Just make it feel like all these people

have just discovered this video. But I don't think that people really play by the rules. The top comment is always, GMM sent me here. Oh, of course, yeah. They don't keep it a secret. Well, and on the podcast, my good friend sent me this guy that he knew when he lived in Pasadena,

this guy who's now moved down to Cabo, and he calls himself Dr. Fun. You can talk about Dr. Fun. Okay, that guy sells LSD. No, what this guy sells is these little songs where he says things like, you gotta shift, shift, shift, shift your focus till you're feeling good, and he just has all these motivational songs that he just goes on a rooftop

in Cabo and sings them. Wow. Into his phone, yeah. And he's been doing it for years, and he's got a YouTube channel, he's got his Facebook, and you know, there's like, I don't know, maybe 100 people will watch each YouTube video or whatever.

It's like a little, an acapella jingle where this guy's just, it's like self-motivation. And he's just got thousands of them? I guess. Well, so, I don't know how many songs he has, but we sent everybody to this guy because I was legitimately, like, memorizing these songs and finding myself singing them. Wow. Because, and I literally-

You stopped going to your therapist. I started using them. If I was feeling a little bit down, I'd be like, man, I gotta shift, shift, shift, shift my focus so I'm feeling good, and it would really work. But nobody knows what you're talking about. You're like, you know this, sing along. It's just for me. And so we sent a bunch of people to his website

and then I've been following his Facebook when he was like, I didn't have any idea what was going on. Oh, really? Wow. And then he was like, but I found out my friend Lance, who knows Rhett and Link,

sent everybody over here. And so then he was like, here's a list of 17 songs that I will send to you if you PayPal me $10. So he's like, oh, Dr. Fun is catching it. Yeah. Hey, he's living up in Cabo. It's a legitimate service, man.

I was like, I haven't downloaded the playlist yet, but I'm like, yeah, if I can get all of Dr. Fun's songs in one place, that's worth $10. You haven't given him $10, man? I just haven't gotten around to it. So I've given him publicity, man. Everyone else can give him $10, man? I just haven't gotten around to it. I've given him publicity, man. Everyone else can give him $10. I gave him exposure. Right.

Well, I mean, that's what Fiverr's for, right? I mean, that sounds like a very Fiverr thing, like making jingles for people. And I'm sure some people have made some pretty good money off of Fiverr. I almost said Fiverr. Don't get me started on Fiverr. You guys are an old married couple.

Yeah. But there was like that one guy. I'm guessing it was a guy on Fiverr. I said it. Damn it. All right. Let's talk about Fiverr. Are we changing the subject? Fiverr Internet? We're both on Fiverr.

That's great. I'm a big fan of Fiverr. In college, we got turned on to like a big can of Metamucil, not a sponsor. Yeah. Is it a sponsor? Yes. Is Metamucil a sponsor for this episode, Kevin? Potential sponsor. No?

Well, one day. One can dream. Changed everything. Highly recommend. Really? I mean, if your diet's right, you don't need it. When you travel, you should take some fiber. You should do a spoonful of Metamucil or some other sort of psyllium husk-based fiber supplement. For real? Before you go to bed, yeah.

It changes your whole travel. Wow. Yeah. I thought this was a bit, but wow. No, man. We care about you guys. We care about your GI tract. Do you guys use a bus when you're touring?

Yep. Okay. If the cities are close enough, yeah. So we slept on the bus twice this past little trip. And do you guys have a no pooping on the bus policy? Oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's not ours.

There were signs that I think come with the bus. Because there's no bathroom. So... Yeah. They're just all over the bus. Please don't poop on the bus. Don't poop here. Find a corner.

It's like that. Yeah. The dark, dark spot. Yeah. But there's, you can't poop in the, in the toilet.

Yeah. Wow. It's a, well, it's not cool to the other people that are stuck on that. Right. On that vessel. I mean,

I did an RV trip with my family. That was, and I made that rule. I was like, all right, guys, listen up for the orientation. And that was pretty much it. Don't crap in the crapper. And nobody violated the rule? No, day one, they're like crapping in the crapper. I mean, it's like they had to go.

I mean, we're driving down. We're going 80 miles an hour down the freeway. And he's like, Lincoln's dropping a deuce in the... Well, I mean... I'm like, where is he? Where is he? He's been gone! Did it dissipate? Yes, it did. Whatever you're thinking, yeah, it did that. Well, because if it's a good system...

Oh, no, it didn't. If it's a good system, it can contain it. I mean, but, you know, one little leak, and that's all it takes. Oh, you want to talk about RV maintenance and septic maintenance? Let's get back to fiber. Don't forget to, you got to get those little blue tablet thingies, and you got to charge that tank. You got to throw them down in that tank.

And then you take a bite of the blue tablet every morning. It is tempting. Have y'all done that yet? That's what I got down here. Instead of a lemon, I just have one of those blue- Nibbling on an RV toilet tank. Yeah, it gives me a nice little charge. And it makes my poop smell nice.

Right. Take care of the problem. As blue as this tablecloth. Preemptively. But it doesn't surprise me that, you know, that'd be a little harder when you have little tiny humans because, you know, their digestive tracts are a little bit smaller than ours. Yeah, they can't wait as long.

I'm assuming that food just goes straight through. Right. I don't remember that anymore. That's how kids work. We're so far beyond that. Well, you're talking about Fiverr. What is that service? Did you say Fiverr? Fiverr. What is that, what is that service? Did you say Fiverr?

Fiverr. Okay we're back. What is that service, is it called like Cameo or something where you can pay, there's lots of celebrities on there and there's lots of YouTubers on there as well. I think they approached us way back in the day. Yeah. I'm sure you've been approached.

Yeah. Have you ever done it? No. Hold on, what is it? You get paid? This is like I want Ian from Smosh to wish me happy birthday, and I'm going to pay anywhere from like, some people are like 10 bucks,

and some people are like $400, depending on the celebrity. And there's like, I mean, there's some very recognizable celebrities, but it's typically like a lot of like D-list people that, and they'll be like, I'm going to go on and I'm going to do 200 happy birthday wishes. Or it would be like, oh, Susie graduated from vet school. Congratulations. Good luck with the dogs.

Sounds like you've done it. I haven't. But the celebrity sets their price and they set like what they can or can't do and then people basically like submit like a bid for like,

I want you to say this and then I think the celebrity has like 24 hours or 48 hours or whatever to respond and send the video

and then they get paid. They reached out to me like several times and I just kind of ignored it because it, I don't, I don't look down.

It feels weird. It feels weird for myself. I don't look down on people that do it i know i think courtney did it for for a short while and then she's just kind of like but it it's just another way of monetizing your audience i understand that but it is kind of weird if you're like oh yeah you want a video from me saying happy birthday four hundred dollars yeah it's the amount that you'd have to charge to make it worth your time if you're really Yeah. It's the amount that you'd have to charge to make it worth your time if you're really busy.

It's not the amount I'm comfortable charging a 12 year old who wants me to say happy birthday. Right. You can't find that sweet spot. Right. And it's like that kind of weird thing with like festivals

or not festivals, conventions, the convention circuit. Like all the sort of like your CW celebrities, the people that have this sort of like hardcore cw celebrities the people that that have this sort of like hardcore fan base but it's a small hardcore fan base yeah they're making six figures just just doing the convention circuit just doing appearances where basically they sit at a booth

and if you want um a photo signed by them it's like 20 and if you want to take a picture with them just sitting right there that's like another. So it's like just kind of weird. Cause like, they're just kind of sitting at these booths and we call it at, at Comic-Con, we call it depressing celebrity alley where it's like, it's just all these booths lined up. And it's like,

you're sort of like, like a WWE wrestler from the nineties. Some dude that appeared in Star Trek, the next generation. And they're just kind of sitting there. And do they stand up for the photo? I think they stay sitting generally. They stay seated, right? It's an extra $5

for them to stand. The one I really understand for that though is like voice actors, right? Because voice actors don't get residuals. Like if you're on a cartoon and it's still playing, awesome. But if you're in a video game, no residual. Right. You can be the biggest video game character in the world and get paid what you get paid.

And everybody knows you and you're like, you're that guy. But you never get anything from that ever again. So that's why specifically those folks do that. I haven't done it. Disclaimer. I know I'm biased. I know I'm biased. I'm not saying that I won't one day do it.

I mean, we do a meet and greet at all our shows. Sure, yeah. Which is hello and a picture. Yeah. And then they get a little goodie bag or whatever. And something already signed. That's how all old athletes, like you're talking about the WWE,

like old football players, that's what they do, man. In fact, we have a friend who was telling us, he's like a baseball expert, who was talking about Pete Rose. Like Pete Rose apparently has a store in Vegas, and he like sits in the store, and you can like buy some memorabilia and stuff, but it's mainly him sitting there every single day and just doing what these

other athletes do at conventions. It's like, go in, meet Pete Rose, get an autograph, get a picture. And that's his income. Wow.

And he just has a store where he just, people just come through. That's really smart for Vegas because people are just coming from all over and they don't really have anything else to do other than drink alcohol and gamble. So I guess that's probably a better, that's, that's money better spent. Hey, what's in this store? Honey?

Pete Rose? Right there in a folding chair. That's smart. But I think with Comic-Con it's just like, because people aren't specifically coming for them. They're just like kind of walking through. They're like, oh, it's Casper Van Diem just chilling. That was me. I was just walking through. I was like, oh, there's Casper Van diem just chilling like that that was that was me like i was just walking through i was like oh there's casper van diem okay i love starship

troopers but it's funny did you pay up i didn't you just pointed i just like i just kind of like i was like oh yeah all right cool like it's just weird and and i guess it's it's it's it's not it's just weird. And I guess it's not, it's only, I don't know. It's just a little sad for me when I see those people sitting there and there's nobody in the line. And they're just kind of sitting there, like, just waiting for somebody to walk by. I'm like, uh. If there's, like, a line of people and, like, everyone's excited,

like, that's really cool. Yeah. But if it's, like, there's nobody there, I'm like, ah. So if you go, if you're going by and nobody's there and you just strike up a conversation, are they like, is there an awkward moment where they ask for like 10 bucks? Because you're talking to them?

It's like, you're the only person in line, but you are now the line. I don't know if there's a price for just conversation. Is there? Probably not, but they probably go like, so you want like a photo or a signed thing? I'm like, no, I'm good. I was doing this for you, man.

I was just trying to make you not seem alone for a second. Yeah, yeah. You should pay me. They should, do they, I'll do that at Comic-Con. I'll be the guy who talks to the unpopular celebrities to make them feel like somebody's there. Yeah, that's cool. Who's gonna pay you.

Of course, I'm gonna get paid a lot. By, like, the relatives of the celebrities? Like, the celebrity's mom is gonna pay you? Like, that's a small market. Like, old celebrities whose parents are still alive, you get paid, like, twice, maybe three times if they have, like, a stepdad. This is a horrible business model.

Right, exactly. But an untapped market. Right. Yeah. So I think it's smart. Right, yeah. No one else is thinking about this right now. I think we're onto something.

Maybe you can get Pete Rose to invest. He's not busy. No, I think he's very busy. He's got to stay in that store. Right. Does he sit in like a glass cube? He's in busy. He's got to stay in that store. Right. Does he sit in like a glass cube? He's in a claw machine. You pay a quarter, you think you can get him out.

He's like, oh, can't get me. I'll be roast. It's no fair. He's moving. He's still got those jukes. I mean, I read an article that said like those, those people that do those convention circuits, like even though they, they were in like a minor show, like some of them are bringing in like hundreds of thousands of dollars a year and it's all in cash. So they're not reporting.

Yeah. So yeah. I mean, good for them, man. I mean, Stan Lee was, was doing conventions like right up until the end. And I think he, but he wasn't doing it. I don't believe that he was really doing it for the money. I think he was just honestly like excited by the fans and stuff. I think that was really cool. And it never got sad with him. Right. You know what I'm saying? Even in the end, it was like, even when he was just ancient, it was like, oh, it's still, Stan Lee's always cool. Yeah. There was some,

there was some real sketchy stuff that was going on behind the scenes with like his family and all this crazy stuff. Was this nurse or something, right?

Yeah. There's, there's a very long story. There's, there's like people stealing his blood. Like it's, oh gosh.

Yeah. There, there was some kind of like memorabilia thing that was, that was running where apparently like memorabilia thing that was that was running where apparently like one of the guys that was like his business partner was like taking his blood and then using that as like an autograph like you could buy like memorabilia with like a stain of like his blood or something what yeah yeah it's like the most sinister shit you could think of

like like oh what's the most evil thing we could do? Take an old man's blood. Wow. You also can't show that off to your friends. Like, you want to see what I got from Stanley? You bet I would. Bodily fluids. Like, ugh.

I mean. Right. I don't know. I mean, that is a pretty hardcore brag if he had Stanley's blood. But there's so many questions that come after that, though, that you just don't want to answer. That's true. That's true. Like, how much did you spend my mom worked as a uh a lab tech in a health department for years a phlebotomist

she was a phlebotomist yeah she would uh she would do the finger pricks and this all the types of sticks yeah and she would um yeah was at the local health department. And then after we graduated from college, she actually then moved to NC State where we went to school, and she was at the infirmary there. She wasn't there when I was there. It would have been nice having your mom at the infirmary. Right. Hey, Mom, take my blood pressure or something. She'd give you kisses on your boo-boos.

Yeah, give me kisses on my boo-boos. No, Mom, I need medicine like everyone else. But so she would always have a report of who came in there. And it would always be like the NC State athletes. And it would always be like, Julius Hodge came in today. You would not believe how tall he is. Well, I've looked at the roster, so I do know. It turns out she was keeping all their blood and selling.

No, she wasn't. But I'm thinking she could have done that. She could have made it some extra scratch. It's like, I've got Julius Hodges' blood here. Maybe, I don't know. You can inject it before your high school basketball game. Oh my God. That could be a business in the future, you know,

like collecting famous or athlete people's blood. Well, they're already doing stuff with young people's blood. Like that whole thing about, who was it? Was it Mary Queen of Scots? Was she the one that would bathe in the? Oh, yeah. Because Bloody Mary, she would bathe in the blood of the virgins. Like virgin blood. Oh wow. But there's actually,

I mean I. But she didn't take it intravenously. But like, yeah, I don't know, don't quote me on this, I don't know exactly what the science is, but basically. I'll quote you on that. Rhett doesn't know exactly what the science is. I'm gonna be quoting that for years. There's, it might be the plasma,

I don't know what it is in the blood, but taking, like, young blood, like, really does have, like, anti-aging effects. They tested it on rats, and it worked. I guess they did see a noticeable improvement in old rats by putting young rat blood into old rats. So there's some people doing it, but there's no studies on it because it's so sketchy. Yeah, so apparently some people in Silicon Valley people doing it, but there's no studies on it because it's so sketchy. Yeah. So apparently some people in Silicon Valley are doing it.

The rumor is that Peter Thiel was doing it. Peter Thiel, the super rich guy that destroyed Gawker on his own through Hulk Hogan. That's a funny story, man. Yeah. Don't need to get into it. But I think that's so crazy that we're now in the age where, like, we can be vampires. Like, oh, you want to live forever?

Just take some young blood. Yeah. This is also the stuff that, like, thousands of years from now when they discover our civilization, like, we hear stuff like, they used to drink mercury in ancient Egypt. What fools! That killed them. Like, this is going they discover our civilization. Like, we hear stuff like, they used to drink mercury in ancient Egypt. What fools!

That killed them. Like, this is going to be our thing. They're like, they used to drink baby blood as part of their culture. Yeah, they injected bee venom into their faces. Yeah. They put botulism in their face. Yeah. We're here.

I mean, the latest thing I was hearing this morning was they took human DNA and put it into developing monkeys and made them smarter. Whoa. I know how this movie starts. Yeah, right. That was this morning? Or last night. It all blurs together.

Was it using that CRISPR? That's like the gene editing tool? I don't know because I just started thinking Planet of the Apes and I wasn't getting details anymore yeah I think we should just keep monkeys dumb as smart as they are let's just keep it at that level right we won this whole evolutionary thing

let's not keep it there well haven't you seen like the Olympic medalists like helping the person in second when they break their leg across two? Like, we can help out some monkeys. Or like a turtle.

I want a smart turtle. Yeah, and when I say they got smarter, I think what they measured was their ability to differentiate between colors and shapes. And they saw an improvement.

So, I'm not panicking yet. We need them to differentiate between friend and foe before we start making them smarter. Because they're really good at ripping people's faces off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, Coco, she had all kinds of messages for the world. Yeah, that was really sweet. Really?

Yeah, and there's a little controversy over how much she was... Because there's this one clip of Coco saying all this stuff about how man is not treating the earth well. And it's really complex thoughts. And I want to believe it's true so badly because it's so sweet. Was it edited in the way they made Obama say a Beyonce song? No, I think it's an old clip with... It used to be a thing for celebrities to go hang out with Coco.

There's a famous clip of Robin Williams with Coco. Yeah, Coco loved Robin Williams. Mr. Rogers, I think, in his, there's a bit with Coco, right? Well, maybe that's where I saw... Maybe I saw the Mr. Rogers, because it's more recent that I've seen this clip where she's saying all this stuff about people mistreating the earth

and not understanding that they're part of nature. It's really complex. Humans, bad, must kill humans. She's saying she loves mankind. Everyone ignore her. I have developed new bacteria to destroy human race.

She wants yogurt. That's what she's saying. I liked your Coco hand movements too. It's a lot like that. Coco definitely knows more sign language than I do. So I guess that says something. That tells you something. So you guys were just in Nashville.

Yeah. And I said, while you guys were in Nashville, you had to try some of that Nashville hot chicken. Oh, yeah. And we had not had it before we went. Oh yeah. So if, do you know where we went? Because.

I asked Rhett, he said you guys went to Hattie B's. Where would you have told us to go? I have no idea, I've never been. Oh, you've never been. You've never been to Nashville? No, I want to though. But I love me some hot chicken. But you haven't had it at the source.

Nope. And your favorite place in town is what? You said you went to Dave's? I went to Dave's Hot Chicken. And where's Dave's? That's over on the west. I don't know. I don't know streets.

I just use Google Maps. But Howlin' Rays is apparently the best hot chicken place in Los Angeles. So basically, for the people that are listening, hot chicken is basically like just some good-ass chicken, and it's just basted in all this. It's like fried chicken, but it's like basted in all this spicy goodness. But it's dry. It's not really saucy as much as like it's closer to a rub.

Yeah. And the rub is in the breading. Yeah. So it kind of like, if you peel back the skin, you see redness already on the meat. Yeah. I didn't know that. I thought it was just hot sauce on chicken.

Yeah. Boy, was I wrong. Oh, it's so good. It's really good. I mean, I didn't like spicy foods. After all the spicy stuff we've eaten on our show, it messed me up. Yeah. So I would just have a brain block.

It would just tell my stomach, you're not going to like this. Don't eat it. Feel nauseous just by the smell. But then I got so excited about that, and it turned the tide. Really? It was good. How did it compare spice-wise to I mean, it tasted much better. It had a lot of flavor.

And the dry rub doesn't have the same lasting effect of sauce. Oh, okay. So sauce, because it's got oil in it, it sticks with you and you feel it in your stomach. Something about it was just very hot immediately and then I was like, an hour later I was like I don't feel anything. Did it come with, because I don't know how

they do it there, but sometimes I know they come with just straight up white bread. It was white bread? They give you like two slices of white bread. Yeah, and then a pickle on top and then if you get the coleslaw with it, that helps a lot. Yeah. Okay, okay because yeah the hot chicken i've had here they serve it on like on like a legit bun with like the slaw and the pickles

right and it's so good oh my god i've never tried it i'm from the south so that's shameful yeah i've never had chicken that just like just just melted in my mouth it was was just like, oh, God. Where are you from? Georgia. A place called Peachtree City, which is the most Georgian name ever. Peachtree City. Peachtree City, yeah. It's a fake place.

It sounds made up. He's a secret agent. Peachtree City town? It's outside of Atlanta? Now we're south, yeah. Now, if you're going down on, if you're going down there, let's see. There's a big water tower with a peach on it, but I think that's in South Carolina.

Well, it's in South Carolina on House of Cards. Yeah. Because there was a whole season two of House of Cards. So you got the peach tree city. Yeah. But they got the peach water tower. I'm sure we've got a few ourselves, though. But to be fair, I did not see a single peach tree in Peachtree City, Georgia.

Really? Yeah, everything's just named after peaches and peach trees. And there's like Peachtree Parkway, Peachtree Street. Very few of them are in Peachtree City. So did you have a southern accent? Not really. I think I sort of affected that a little bit more once I came out here because it just sort of felt like I had an identity. I spoke very like

non-regionally but that also made it, you know, I was an actor and it made it a little tough because if you're too proper speech and everything, you're just not a believable human. Well, how old were you when you moved out here? 18. From Georgia? From Georgia. Born in Germany, raised in Georgia

and now, yeah, here's home. But you don't, I mean, you don't have any, you eradicated it. Did you take a class? No, it's just, I mean, my parents were, I mean, my mom was born in Ohio. My dad was like born to a German immigrant family. Okay. Like there was no hope of ever picking up any specific affectation. But to be fair, people generally think they don't have an accent. So I wouldn't

know unless you told me I don't have an accent. You don't have an accent. I believe you. I trust you. I don't think you have an accent either. I have a California accent. Yeah, he has like a California. Like this Sacramento accent. You got a Sacramento accent?

It's like a Northern California accent. And then when you go up a little bit more Northern, then you get people like, oh yeah man. Like, you know. Me hun. I don't know. I know I definitely have like a little bit of a California thing going on.

But obviously like wherever you grow up, you're like I don't have an accent. Right. You know. But it's just, it's not nearly as, I mean what you're describing Of like Sacramentites Or whatever Yeah

You're calling it Yeah that Sacramentites We also have like I think if they hang From the top of the cave They're sacramentites Yes yes

No that's a tight We also have like A good deal of rednecks In Sacramento So Yeah There is There is like a little mix

Of like You have a little bit Of mix of California And a little mix of Kansas And a little mix of like, you have a little bit of mix of California and a little mix of Kansas and a little mix of like the South. I've seen a few Confederate flags flying around my town. Wow. Yeah.

Yeah, you gotta be a special kind of person to not be from the South and adopt that as your symbol. Like there was somebody, like I was driving through... Basically Burbank, right? Well, no, it was a little bit north of Burbank, and I was like, does that guy...

That guy has a Confederate flag flying in his front yard just outside of Los Angeles. And, I mean, I don't think there's any excuse for it regardless of where you're from, but... Yeah. Like, my son was saying there's any excuse for it regardless of where you're from. But like, my son was saying there was a kid

that goes to school there that is from California and has adopted the whole thing. He's got a pickup truck and a rebel flag like bumper sticker on his. Yeah. I think some people,

I think for some people it's just pure ignorance. Like it's a situation where they don't, like they, what was it, they um was it dukes of hazard like they had the big like yeah generally generally right with the confederate like logo on it like so i think some people just associate with like rebelliousness and being like yeah like i'm a beer drinking american you know right and then there's some people that are that you know they they see it as tied to some kind of history of the south that never actually existed because that flag wasn't even

used for the confederacy like the actual the actual confederate flag that you see everybody using i i and we'll have to fact check this but it wasn't used in as like the flag of the confederacy like that flag where it's just that um that x was used i think for one battle or something like you'll see that it was like a part of the old flag yeah yeah you'll see it used in parts of the flag but it's not the whole thing um so it's kind of weird that that it only happened it was only later on that people started using just that that pattern so it's like it's kind of weird to say like oh this is like this is just a heritage thing not a hate thing it's like well it's not really a heritage thing i think it's like when people are looking for some kind of identity, any kind of identity.

And, you know, there's such like a meshing that happens in America. And sometimes you lose, you know, people don't say necessarily anymore like, I'm German, I'm Irish, I'm Italian. A lot of it just becomes like white. And so then it's like, well, you can't look back. There's no like that history. So people are like, where are we going to go for that flag? That's the closest thing I can get. And then it's like,

all right, great. Now I have some history and some culture and they ignore the sort of parts of that that are not so awesome. Sure. Yeah. But yeah, I think that's part of where it comes from.

Or they actively embrace. I was giving people the benefit of the doubt, but yeah, no, it's a bummer. Well, that's the thing that I've seen is like, there's just a lot more people actively embracing the hate part of the,

of the history and that, and it's like, and becoming emboldened to, to embrace it and getting away with it. And I think, you know, if you start, if you, if you're like kind of sporting that stuff and then people start, you know, attacking you for it, it doesn't necessarily change your mind if people are just attacking you. So it kind of just emboldens you to that flag or that identity and sort of drives you further away into that sort of realm, you know, rather than, rather than people having like a legitimate conversation about it and saying like,

I understand where you're coming from, but you also understand that that flag doesn't mean what you think it means. Yeah. Rather than being like that, like a lot of people are just quick to be like, no, you're like a racist bigot and like go to hell, blah, blah,

blah. And I think that's, that's what drives people apart more. So I'd like it for the flag to just, that flag does not exist, but that's not going to happen. Cause you're, also you're flying a flag

of a regime that no longer exists that was defeated in battle and is technically the enemy of America. The enemy that is, so it's like literally kind of like flying

a Nazi flag and just being like, no, that was just a good time for other reasons and like, no, it was never,

never was. Yeah. I'm sure we're gonna get some great comments. Great, let's edit this all out. I will say though, no, it was never, never was. Yeah. I'm sure we're going to get some great comments. Great, let's edit this all out. I will say though, one of the most entertaining things I ever saw

was the girl I was dating at the time went to her high school reunion and it was in Kansas, which I don't believe was ever part of the Confederacy, but there's a guy that came to the reunion. He came in on a riding lawnmower with a 24-pack of Miller High Life, and he had Confederate flag boots and a Confederate flag belt buckle and a hat, like a cowboy hat.

So he was local to the venue. Born and raised in Kansas. But he was close enough to drive his lawnmower there. Or did he bring it on a trailer? No, I'm pretty sure he drove it there. You can get pretty fast. You know, you've got some experience with riding lawnmowers. I mean, especially the new ones, man. Oh yeah, you get that hydrostatic transmission. Have you been on one of those? I remember the first time I got one of those, it just... Forward and reverse is just... Yeah, it's just one of these, right? I was always so jealous of the kids that had those.

Yeah. And there's like a zero-inch turning radius, because you just push one... No, you're talking about... I never had the two handles. Oh man, you gotta get one of those. It worked like a... Let's see, one of those little, a little version of a track hoe where it's like, you can turn on a dime.

Oh, okay, yeah. Like literally no one in the greater Los Angeles area has a riding lawnmower, like at their house. Because nobody has a lawn. Right. It's all like desert scrub. They're like, I don't want to deal with this. Let's put in rocks and a cactus and we're good.

There's probably some really wealthy guy in Beverly Hills with one of those two-acre lots that's got his own riding lawnmower. Really? You think he mows his own lawnmower? No, no, no. Spinning around with zero. That guy does not mow his own lawnmower. No, no. I'm saying that he's doing it to not let go of his manhood.

He's using the riding lawnmower. But, like, not always. He's just, like, quarterly. He goes out there and just spins around in one spot in the yard. Even though he could pay someone full time to hold his manhood for him. Well, he also does that. Yeah. That is, like, one sort of redneck thing that I wish I would be able to participate in,

which is the lawnmower races. We've done it. You've done it? Really? We've both participated in a lawnmower race. Well, there's different types. The one that, there's the race track, like you're riding in a circle like you would on NASCAR,

but you're just on a fast lawnmower. But what we did was the tractor pull, but with lawnmowers. With lawnmowers. Where there's the sled that has the weight, and then the weight moves from the back of the sled, and as you're driving, it slowly creeps up and makes it harder to... Eventually it will stop you no matter what. But the, I mean, there are different divisions of lawnmowers.

And some of them look like drag race cars. Yeah. And sound like it, too. Yeah, they're not really lawnmowers anymore. They're like 250, 300 CC engines. Yeah, they don't... Plus blades. They don't have the blades.

No. Although, if you wanted to make it more interesting, you keep the blades on. Absolutely. You take the covers off. Although if you wanted to make it more interesting, you keep the blades on. Absolutely. You take the covers off, and then you just let all hell break loose. Was that during the days of Stevie recently unearthed on, let's talk about that,

like the sizzle reel? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The old sizzle reel? Yeah. We had an idea for a show. This is back 20, it was 2011. Probably 2008 is when we shot the thing, maybe 2009.

Oh yeah, because 2007 was when we did our first really short-lived TV show out here, and then we were trying to get something else going. So right after that. Yeah, we were like, we like dirty jobs. What's the red-link version of dirty jobs? Well, it's redneck jobs. Yeah. Redneck hobbies. Right.

So we were gonna go, like, noodling, you know, like fishing for catfish with your hands and stuff like that. Yeah, we were gonna experience all the redneck hobbies. And for the sizzle reel that we made, I found out from my dad, he was like, well, they do the lawnmower tractor pull right around here. I know everybody. So we just show up, and my dad is like the ambassador. He was like our film permit, you know,

in the walking film permit. He's like, hey, if my boys are here, can they ride on your tractor in the competition? It's like everybody was just cool with it. That's great. So your dad has like a secret life as a tractor pull ambassador. It's not very secret. No?

He's out. Yeah, everybody seems to know my dad and he's the type of guy that will he'll find himself being the president of things just because everybody likes him and they just appoint him that. So like

he'll join a club well, like, well I got a solo at the cantata at church. I was like, I didn't just because everybody likes him and they just appoint him that. So he'll join a club. Well, he's like, well, I got a solo at the cantata at church. I was like, I didn't even know you went to that church, Dad. He's like, well, I didn't until I showed up one day and then I'm singing a solo. And now I'm the priest. What's a priest? That's probably what he would say.

But yeah, anyway. So, well, I started going to the Lions Club, and now I'm the president. Like, literally, they just put him in charge of everything because he's like this charismatic guy who everybody likes, and he's good at raising money and making stuff happen or putting guys on tractors. So your dad could make a pretty good cult leader, then.

He could, yeah. He's spending more time down there in Myrtle Beach, doing some shagging. Oh. I mean, we talked about, you know, we kind of ripped the South a new one, but, I mean, there's some beautiful aspects to it as well. Sure, of course. All the fried foods, and then the beach shagging. Okay, just so we're clear here,

are you referring to sexual intercourse? Sadly, no, I'm referring to... That's the only shagging that I know. You don't know about the dancing, the shagging? No. It's a dance. Oh my God, I thought you were saying that your dad goes to the beach and has sex with people. I was like, whoa.

I was like, this is getting really open. Okay, geez. All right. I'm sure he has. It's isolated to the south and it's very popular in South Carolina, in Myrtle Beach specifically. And it's just like a... It's you and your dance partner just kind of like shuffling your feet. There's like a gentle shuffle to the feet.

You've seen people dance like this, you just didn't know it was called shag. Got it. Shag now, shag later kind of thing. Okay, thank God you cleared that up because I was just going to move right along with like, okay, yeah, you're just openly talking about your dad's sex life. That's fun.

You guys have a great relationship. I don't remember who told me this story, but there were some people from England visiting South Carolina, and they were on a bus with these two old couples who were talking about shagging. And they had a conversation,

like an extensive conversation about it. And they were like, whoa, South Carolina is people very open about their sexuality. It was like Woodstock never ended over here. What if they like invited those English people and then they show up to the house naked? They're like, we're ready for shagging. I think you got something wrong here. Right.

So speaking of shagging, actually it has nothing to do with it um so the way the way that uh the like the place that smosh works out of um is sort of shared with with mythical um on our side uh still resides your food producer yeah and all the food that you guys are making and testing mythical chef josh yeah and uh as it turns out i I don't know if everyone here knows, but you guys make some pretty disgusting food. And not only does it taste bad, it also smells really bad. Right. Sorry about that.

And so occasionally we'll just be working, you know, minding our own business, and this terrible smell will just waft over. And we're like, well, I guess we we're just gonna live with this for a couple hours Oh gosh Yeah, we didn't tell you about this When you moved in It was like, you get your own space And it's gonna be great

We're not gonna talk about the smells Yeah, yeah I mean, you don't have to eat it Everything that you smell Just think about that Every time you smell something horrible And I mean, you don't have to eat it. No, that's true. Everything that you smell... Just think about that. Every time you smell something horrible... Yeah. ...and you feel like you can't endure it, in a few hours, we're going to be

eating it. Right. We're going to ingest it. It's the most intimate exercise ever is putting something... Do I have to spell this out? To put something in your mouth and then try to masticate it. Uh-huh. and then swallow it. Yeah. I mean, at least try.

Yeah, but it's over before you know it, though. I mean, when you smell something over a period of time. It's so intimate. Like, smelling something is arguably pretty intimate, but it's not as intimate as putting it on your tongue, chewing it, swall it. Letting it pass through your entirety. Right. Why are you talking about how intimate it is? Just to put it in perspective whenever it stinks over there.

Well, I'm going to dad mode. I think I know what you're going to say. Go for it. The shoes? The shoes. Yeah, okay. Oh, we haven't eaten shoes, so what's up? Go for it.

So one day we were all just sitting around and we noticed this horrific smell, but it was more like this might be toxic for us. And they were air frying shoes. And then it's not like, oh, that doesn't smell delicious. I don't want to eat that. It's a matter of like, what is this putting into the air? What factory goo are we getting? They did that inside?

They did that inside. They did. They were air frying like sneakers in the kitchen. And I was like, this doesn't seem safe. So I like walked over there and I was like, hey, like, I don't think this is okay. And like he had the, I was like, do you have like a fan on? And he was like, well, you know how they have like the little range over the stove that has a fan? He's like, well, yeah, the fan's on,

but it just blows right out into the room. I was like, great, awesome. So after that, a Slack message was sent out. And I think from now on, any sort of toxic substances that are being cooked are now cooked outside. I get it. So you asking us on the podcast is really just

an intervention. So you're not gonna die. That's fair. You got an alarm. Is this over? No. That was somebody calling me and I was rude. Yeah, the shoe never made it on the show.

That was just a test. Great. We interrupted the process. If it wasn't for you guys, we would have had an awesome shoe frying episode. We did air fry a football though. Yeah. That was also cooked inside. Yeah. Yeah.

We experienced that scent. And yeah, I don't think that was good for anybody. I think. I'm not smarter. I'll put it that way. Now we're paying attention to those like mesothelioma commercials that you never thought about before. Now you're like, hold up, turn it up. I should not smarter. I'll put it that way. Now we're paying attention to those mesothelioma commercials that you never thought about before. Now you're like, hold up, turn it up. I should know this.

Yeah, we're already working on a class action lawsuit against Mythical. Oh, gosh. No, it's really funny, though, because I brought it up to Josh, and there was another guy there. And the other guy was like, well, I mean, we've been doing this kind of stuff for five years, and I haven't died yet. I was like, you know, that's not the best benchmark.

I haven't died yet. Yeah, that's not how those illnesses work. Yeah, a lot of the things we do, you kind of stumble into the realization that we could have done it a different way. You know, I think that's just, that's the nature of the work. That's the fun of the internet.

It's a new frontier. We're all trying to figure it out. Yeah. Maybe that's something you could argue could have been anticipated. Hey, let's burn this shoe outside. Yeah. But sometimes you just got to stop and smell the football to realize we could do this differently. And I think another thing that you guys learned

is that, Link, you can't hold knives. What's the story behind this? You're not allowed to hold onto knives on videos? Yeah. I don't know what the first, I don't know what the genesis of this rule was, but it's gotten out of hand at this point. I mean, I can't use anything that's sharp or pointy.

They still let me throw darts. Oh, but Chase is very far away now. Yeah, he gets very far away because one of my darts got very close to him one time when I threw at a time when he didn't. I threw for emphasis. You know, I was making a point in my recollection and I just, it was a nice punctuation.

Just think about how things would be different if you, I mean, it missed, like he had his arm out and it went either above or below his arm. Just think about how things would be different. There's a number of things that could have gone a different way. I'm sure he's had his tetanus. I mean, if he's up to date on the tetanus, it's fine.

What if he had it gone right into his eyeball? I think about that. I mean, eye patches are pretty dope. They're kind of in these days. Very anime. I would have felt bad. Do you think we'd still be making this show if you had thrown a dart into someone's eye and blinded them?

We probably wouldn't be doing dart episodes anymore. So you've had some close calls with knives then? Like, I don't understand. You're just not allowed to handle them? Well, in his personal life, he cut himself one time. I think, I mean, it may have been six Christmases ago now that we would always go to Christy's parents' house on Christmas Eve Eve.

So then, like, that morning, because we had to go see the other family parents' house on Christmas Eve, Eve. So then like that morning, because we had to go see the other family, that would be the Christmas morning there. So you'd like open the presents. And my daughter was of an age to get a Barbie. She opens the Barbie and she's like, Dad, I can't get into the Barbie. It's like in one of those clamshell.

Yeah, it's the worst. Yeah, so you're like trying to get into it, and my father-in-law hands me his knife. And so I just slice open the top of the Barbie doll, and I just sliced the end of my finger. I didn't slice it off. I cut my finger pretty deeply. My middle finger, if I remember correctly.

But I'm very queasy when it comes to blood flow. Yeah, did you pass out? And at that point, I was, I try not to panic, but I did, and I just grabbed my finger and I ran out of the living room into the kitchen, and I don't know why I wanted to, I just wanted to run my finger under the water in the sink. Yeah, I mean, wash it, sure. Does it, yeah, I guess. That makes sense.

Yeah. But the next thing I remember is I could see the, I opened my eyes and I saw the cabinet like below the sink. I was like, I was all of a sudden at a lower level. And then I looked up and I was in my father-in-law's arms. Oh, wow. And so, yeah, I was bleeding. I was bleeding out, man.

Yeah. No, it wasn't that bad at all. It was just like a little Band-Aid fixed it. But he never lets me live that down. I'm sure, man. Yeah. No, it wasn't that bad at all. It was just like a little band-aid fixed it. Yeah. But he never lets me live that down. I'm sure, man. Of course, every Christmas Bobby's trying to talk about the knife. It's like, well, don't give him the knife. So

the rule was at his house. Link doesn't get a knife, but I'm gonna constantly talk about how I'm trying to give him a knife. Boy, this is funny. Oh, this is a sore subject. We actually don't go there for Christmas anymore. I don't even fly home. We go home for Thanksgiving now, and this is why.

I just couldn't take the ridicule. No, not for Thanksgiving. Can you cut the turkey? No. They just pass it around and take bites out of it. Yeah. There's no turkey that's not cut at all. There's something primal about that.

So, yeah. I mean, that, um... He loved it. He loved it. Of course. You know, that's um... He loved it. He loved it. Of course. You know, he's just waiting for years for me to faint in his arms. But I think it's a general... It goes beyond the fact that you injured yourself. It's also, uh...

You give a knife to Link, and... You give anything to Link, and he's going to, like, do something a little extra with it. And knives tend to be dangerous to do things extra with. I hear it. So it's like we just don't. Are you trying to use the cool parlance of extra? Are you saying I'm extra? I'm not trying.

I am using that. Okay. I'm just saying if you give you something, you're going to move it in a way that like, okay, it's just a little something extra. You're not using it right. If you want to seem cool, you just gotta say, Link is extra. Right? Well, that kind of sounds like an insult.

No, being extra, that's proper usage. Okay. But doing something a little extra. Well, I'm using it in the traditional sense, but it's also playing into the modern parlance. You know what I'm saying? A little something additional that draws a little attention to it. I'll continue to not use knives if you don't use the term extra. That's fair.

You want to use the term flare. Like a Ruby Tuesday's waiter, Link has a tendency to bring a little flare to things. And when you bring flare to knives, people get hurt. Fair enough. Fireworks, you allowed around those? He shouldn't be. I don't think either one of us are because we nearly blew ourselves up

in the parking lot. Really? Well, that was when we combined brake fluid and, uh... No, what was it? Yeah, that'll do it. Chlorine and... Aluminum foil? No, it was chlorine and brake fluid.

Don't combine those two. Isn't that mustard gas? What are you doing? Oh, I've heard about that. It just combusts on its own, right? Yeah, it was instant fire. It was crazy. It's one of the biggest accidents we've ever had.

Wow. I think I saw that. Right? I think I saw that video. It created like a volcano. Some things on fire. Yikes. But I'm actually, for the first time, because, you know...

So again, we discover things. You can't do any fireworks, any legitimate fireworks in California for good reason because of all the fire hazards. But in South Carolina, you can basically... It's the most lenient laws, and there's a number of states that have these where you can do like the real, like you'll get like a mortar shell that's as big as your fist, right? Yeah.

So my father-in-law used to send us down to South Carolina with like a couple hundred bucks to like get just whatever we wanted. Get the good stuff. And then come back up to North Carolina, we would do these fireworks displays. And I've told a bunch of stories about all the accidents we had. But this year, doing it again because I'm gonna be in North Carolina on July 4th. Oh, really?

Oh. So. But is it illegal to use those fireworks in North Carolina? Technically, yes. Okay. But none of the. But no one's recording this.

No, that's true. The police are like, they'll drive right by you. They give you, they're like, we understand, man. It's just once a year celebrating freedom of our country. Until the vacant lot goes up in flames, as it has in past years. Right, but I think we're gonna do it at their other house, which is up on that river, and there's a dock that goes out into the river.

Oh, you just burn the dock down. Yeah, the dock just burns into the water, and then everybody walks away. That makes sense. I'm pretty excited about it, though. You know, because once a year... I wonder what your budget is. Everybody, you know, somebody in South Carolina loses a finger.

Or worse. Yeah. And there's just a little bit of, you know, I don't know, there's some adventure in there. You really gotta get your, what's it called, the wick? Fuse. The fuse. You gotta get your fuse game down. Well, what I used to do is I would spend all day, because there's the big green fuse which burns, like I mathematically tested it and knew that like 10 inches of fuse

was this many seconds and it was very reliable, and I engineered the whole thing where I would just have to light one fuse and it would do like a 25 minute firework show. Oh, nice. I'm not going to do that because I'm not going to take all day. You know, I don't have the patience for that anymore. Just get a Good Mythical Morning producer to do it for you. We'll get him to rig it all up here and then we'll just, I'll put it in the

overhead on the plane. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fine. Sir, we need to check your bag. Wow. I'd have some residue on my fingers

if you know what I mean. Yeah, we'll get them working on that right outside of your office. Okay, great. No, they can do it inside the office. It's fine.

It's fine. We've smelled worse. Well, we're coming up on our time. There's a little thing that we're doing now called ian's funny news oh yeah okay i like that name uh it's news that's only funny to me for usually terrible reasons okay so i will say um i heard about this story and the way that it

was worded made me go uh and it's not funny it's actually one of the worst things that i've seen in a while um but the way that it was worded was shane walked up and he's like hey have you heard about like this um this this uh one planet thing is this our planet our planet yeah he's like have you heard about this our planet thing um apparently like climate change is making walruses commit suicide oh like they're making them like jump off cliffs and i was like because it's just like it's just like of course climate change is making animals jump off cliffs like of course so uh you know for the for the sake of the podcast i i watched the episode it the thing that was funny to me was- By episode, you just mean footage of walrus eye or whatever.

Yeah. Jumping off cliffs. I'll show you the photo first because I think- So Twitter, of course, reported on it. Okay. And their header photo is just this walrus doing a T-pose off a cliff. Wow. And it's terrible, but just...

You see, you want to... I don't... Spread eagle, man. As you can see, the walrus is just doing a classic T-pose. It looks like Grimace from McDonald's just peeking over the cliff. Well, maybe that's what it is. That would be funny. Maybe it's a viral marketing campaign for McDonald's.

Up here, guys. The burgers are up here. So there's nothing funny about the actual thing that happened. Right. Apparently, like, what happened, climate change is driving, like, hundreds of thousands of walruses to this one rocky area in North Russia. Okay. And it's, like, there's, like, 100,000 walruses. Walruses are not small things. They're very large North Russia. Okay. And it's like, there's like 100,000 walruses.

Walruses are not small things. They're very large. Yeah. Yeah. So a lot of them are trying to like get out of the crowd. So some of them like hike up this or, you know, kind of wobble up this like mountain to get away from the crowds. But apparently walruses don't have good eyesight out of the water.

So there's like a cliff side and then they can hear the other walruses down at the bottom. And they're like, oh, I need to get back to the water. And they just kind of like fall down the cliff. And it's the most, probably one of the most horrifying things I've ever seen because they just show these walruses. Yeah, I've heard it's horrific. It's terrible. And yeah, so the photo is funny what what is this segment called well that's funny no it's terrible but but the way that it was the way that it was put to me at the very beginning was walruses are just jumping because of climate change i was like

of course and the t-pose was just are they the land? They hit the rocks and they tumble down. And then, like, at the end, they just show this just basically pile of dead horses at the bottom. It's great for the polar bears, because polar bears, it's easy pickings, but... Well, there you go. I mean, they're finding some good

in it. Yeah, yeah. I mean, you know, if we're really talking about victims here, the polar bears are the victims, so maybe this is a good story. Right. Because I think polar bears are suffering more than the walruses. It seems like it's only the introverted walruses that want to get away from the crowds. Yeah, let that be a lesson.

Oh, so it's natural selection. Yeah. Like, we want the party walruses. Right. Don't leave a party early because you might die. You might fall off a cliff. See, let that be a lesson to you people

you introverts I'm an introvert so me too dude I I'd be spattered all across that cliff

cliffside yeah dude I went to a wedding and I I left with my parents it was a family friend and but then

a bunch of them like the wedding party all stayed and it was in it was in the the redwood, like up Northern California, like, like, um, Mendocino County. And the thing about Redwoods, if you've ever been up there is like, it's pitch black, like, like no light gets through those, those trees when it's dark and, you know, everybody's drinking there, they were camping and, uh, and you, somebody was drunk, and they went out to pee,

and they just straight fell off a cliff. What? They survived. They broke their neck, and they kind of landed in a shallow riverbed. They broke their neck and they survived? Yeah, or their back or something. But, yeah. You were there at this?

I wasn't. I left before that. But, yeah, pretty. But I think they weren't awards though. They weren't awards all the time too. San Diego, really? Yeah, they've got cliffs down there and usually once a year in the papers. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I stayed down there one time.

Really? There's those cliffs that... There's like a road and then it's just a straight drop for a few miles. I think it's near Sunset Beach or something like that down there, north of San Diego. A few mile drop? No, no, no, no. The drop is like a couple hundred feet, but it goes like that for a few miles.

And there's just plenty of places where you're just like, oh, I could just be walking on this grass, and I could just fall right off. I could totally see that happening. Do you ever get that feeling? They call it, what's it called? Are you talking about the feeling where you're on a cliff edge and then it feels like your balls are hurting? That's a different thing.

That only happens to you. You ever been- I refuse to believe that only happens to me. There's a word for it. Oh, I know what you're talking about. Yeah. It's like, oh,. Oh, I know what you're talking about. Yeah. It's like, oh, well, I'm going to get the, so it's like a French word, and I'm going to get it wrong, but it's l'appel du vide, something like that.

Anyone speak French here? L'appel du vide. Yeah, it's the call of the void, where it's like you stand over a cliff, or if you're driving and you're like, what if I just drove straight off this? You're not suicidal, but you're like, or if you're driving and you're like, what if I just drove straight off this? You're not suicidal, but you're like, what if I just did that? The thought pops into your head like,

unvolitionally. Subconsciously, you're thinking, oh, what if I went over? I have a similar thing that happens sometimes, and this hasn't happened recently. It was more when I was a kid. I would be in a conversation with somebody and I'd be like, what if I just punch this person

right in the face? Yes, yes! What? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I would be like. What do you mean yes? Yeah, yeah. Well, I relate to that, as I relate to this. I know you're relating to it, that's what I'm asking. It isn't a desire to punch somebody,

I've never punched anybody in the face. Same. It's a simple like, how crazy would it be if I punched somebody in the face right now? Yeah. It would change everything. I'd be in a situation where just like,

if I were to do this right now, Yeah. What would happen? It would change everything. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, what's the weirdest thought

I could have right now? Same thing as the submitting to the void kind of situation. It's the same kind of like, I'm making eye contact, but like, what if I just like, bit their nose? You're like, hey, I think the same way the void kind of situation. It's the same kind of like, I'm making eye contact, but what if I just bit their nose?

You're like, hey, I think the same way, man. Thank you. You guys have messed up. It's not messed up, though. I've never looked at somebody's nose and thought, I can't just bite that thing off. But now you're going to. Now you're going to be thinking that.

You're going to be like, man, it'd be so weird. Yeah, you've ruined conversations for me forever now. Well, welcome to my world. You're welcome. welcome yeah i'd like to punch you in the face but it's like it's a pretty common phenomenon to it's it's also known as high place phenomenon where you just kind of look over a place you're like no but what if no you know it's like it's a weird and like sometimes like i'll get that feeling i'm, like it just gives me shivers. I'm like, God. Well, I just skip directly to the, and it's in my ball sack.

It hurts. I mean, it hurts. You need to see a doctor. It's like I've gotten kicked in the nuts. But it's like when you look over the edge of something. I hate that. Or when I see someone doing that, like the, I mean, the sweaty palms thread on Reddit.

Have you been to the- I can't watch that stuff. What's the Sears Tower? Where they have the, you can walk out over the glass and look straight down. I did that in Tokyo. Yeah? It was spooky. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, anyway. Brett, I just said Tokyo. Sorry. You don't have to do it. You know what? I'm not going to pollute your podcast.

What is the rule? What is the rule? Did you say Tokyo weird? I do it. Nope. I have a response that I make. I do it on Good Mythical Morning, and I will do it at live Rhett and Link events.

But I don't do it in real life. That's fair. I didn't do that intentionally. I just had to thought. This is't real. Saving a bit for the live show? Is this where you guys promote your, do you guys have any tours coming up?

Yeah, we do. Redlinklive.com. We're going to, well, at the end of June, we're going to- The West and the Upper Midwest? Las Vegas. Middle of the country. Denver, Salt Lake City.

Detroit. Minneapolis. Omaha. Ooh, nice. It's a musical concert for ages. Yeah. As opposed to a... I mean, we might just talk to each other

until we punch each other in the face. Or bite each other's nose off. Yeah, bite Link's nose off. I mean, you could bite... I mean, with your bite strength you could easily bite someone's finger off, right? Totally. So a nose is even easier. You could easily bite somebody's

nose off. Nose would be easier if it's cartilage. Easy. Oh, gosh. Next podcast, I'd love to have you guys back on for another podcast and maybe we'll dig more into which body parts would be easier to bite off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But let's save that for the next one've got a list sure okay okay work on that list please all right well thank you guys so much for coming on i could i could talk to you guys for forever um i hope you

enjoyed my funny news i did because i did horrible yeah the more i talked about i'm like i shouldn't have i shouldn't have brought this up no up. No one will say anything about it. No one's going to be upset with you at all. No, trust me. People are going to be a lot more upset about the Confederate flag talk we had. Well, we're going to cut most of that. We're going to leave all the things you said, Damien. We're going to cut the rest of our opinions.

I just always try to dig to, like, where does that come from? And then I end up humanizing people that I 100% don't agree with. And then I look bad, and people are like, he likes Confederates. I'm like, people that I 100% don't agree with and then I look bad and people are like he likes Confederates. I'm like no. Don't. But thank you guys so much for coming on and thank you guys for listening. You the listeners and the viewers

thank you so much. If you're not yet subscribed to the Smoshcast please feel free to do that on any of your favorite podcast apps. We also got a YouTube channel the full video comes out two days after on Friday. And you can subscribe to us on the YouTube channel. And be sure to like, comment, do all that fun stuff. Let us know what you thought of all the things we did.

And who should we have on next? Let us know. I love you guys so much. Thank you again, Rhett and Link. That was sweet. Bye i love you guys so much thank you again retinlink bye love you guys bye