Snook - 2 Hours of Unhinged True Reddit Threads

Episode Date: August 17, 2026

From an OP who discovers her husband is disgustingly obsessed with their boss... to an OP who discovers her husband is having an affair with his step-sister... this is 2 Hours of Unhinged True Reddit ...Threads... Please do not attempt to contact anyone talked about in this video. Timestamps! 0:00 | Intro 1:46 | I found out My Husband is obsessed with our Boss daughter... 39:59 | Terrified that my husband has been getting freaky with me while I'm asleep. Now I'm pregnant. 59:19 | I think my husband is having an affair with his step-sister 1:24:54 | My gf found her naughty photos on her stepdad phone 1:33:37 | AITA for refusing to let my neighbor use my vintage bathtub for his “therapy” sessions? 1:48:03 | Who came into OOP’s house and started her dryer? 1:58:25 | Outro Join the Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/SnookYT⁠ ⁠Follow me on instagram and Spotify! If your story or post was included in today's video and you wish for it to be taken down, please reach out to this email. Officialsnook23@gmail.com And yes, I'm a human voice. NEXT SUB GOAL - 100,000 subscribers! So make sure to subscribe! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, what's up guys and welcome back to the channel. And today we're getting into two hours of some unhinged true Reddit threads. And oh boy, do I have some insane, crazy, delusional, and like the title says, unhinged Reddit threads for you guys today. So make sure to stick around. And I appreciate you guys stopping by. It means the world to make sure you like the video and subscribe to the channel. The channel subscriber goal is 1 million subscribers before the end of the year. So please subscribe.
Starting point is 00:00:28 I would really love for you to join the community. And today's video will be a little bit different than usual. You'll be able to see my face reading the story, basically the entire time. And so instead of just kind of the usual text on screen the entire time, you'll be able to see me reading on screen most of the time. So comment down below and let me know. Would you like to see more of this style in the future? If so, like I said, comment down below.
Starting point is 00:00:57 and let me know if you prefer this style or the old style. I just wanted to test this out and see what you guys have to think. And also, you might notice right now, it's nighttime, like usual. But in the very first story of today's video, it's daylight because I started recording this in the daylight, and then it went into the night hours. And the intro corrupted, the first one I recorded. So that's why this is at nighttime. This is recorded after the fact.
Starting point is 00:01:22 But just to save all the comments and people wondering, oh, like, why is it dark now and then light and then dark? whatever. I just wanted to save the comment. And yeah, I'm excited to get into these Reddit threads. They are just unbelievable and just crazy and also sad. So buckle up and make sure you sit back, relax, grab a drink and grab a snack. Without further ado, let's get into two hours of some unhinged true Reddit threads. I 29 female found out my husband, 34 male, is obsessed with our bosses daughter and I have no idea what I could do or how I should proceed. Throw away account because I don't want people following my main to know about these, at least not yet. For some context first, I 29 and my husband 34 work for a small RMG firm here.
Starting point is 00:02:21 We were both recommended through a relative of mine. I have been working here for about six years. My husband for about seven years. During the work time, our boss would occasionally bring his then, teenage daughter, to work. She should have been around 15-ish when we first met her, and had her interact with the employees and stuff to show her what we're doing, how things work, etc. Fast forward to January of this year. The boss brought her in, officially, letting us know that she will be taking over a good deal of his work overlooking things. We were initially hesitant, considering she was so young, turned 20 this year. But ultimately, she wasn't taking over, more so learning how to handle the business,
Starting point is 00:03:13 while the boss managed other work, I suppose. It helped that she herself was also very keen on co-operating and taking advice. often holding meetings to discuss things and making sure she herself is the last to leave work almost every time. It's been an overall good development in that regards. The issue started initially a few months after she started. She would occasionally hold office events just to lighten the mood, and this earned her a lot of praise from all of us, since it's not something the old boss would have time to look into.
Starting point is 00:03:55 We were all talking about her, so it didn't feel too weird at first when my husband joined in on the praising. How impressive it is, she's so young but so mature. How she's been a breath of fresh air in the office. Everyone's so motivated to work because of her, etc. With hindsight, it seems like that was just his in on talking about her with me in general. Every now and then, he'd start singing her praises. When we're at home, a huge talking point always being how she's so mature for her age and understanding, even pointing out how we weren't at that age.
Starting point is 00:04:37 I didn't take it much to heart until one time. I joked that it was fine if he was immature at times and that I would love him regardless. And his response was something along the lines of, well, you were too, unlike her. I think that was the first time I felt a bit bad, because it felt like he actually was just comparing me to her now, but I just tried not to think too much about it. This slowly spiraled too,
Starting point is 00:05:08 going from talking about her maturity to looks, how she can still look good while being so busy with studies and work. How she, and I quote, was definitely more gifted compared to other girls. All right, this is already so weird. And the OP continues. And once, out of insecurity, I asked if he thought she was prettier than me.
Starting point is 00:05:32 He gave me a, of course, you're attractive to me, but objectively, like, not considering my attraction to you, she is prettier. Oh, my God. To say that to your wife is just crazy. And then the OPE continues and says, This messed with me for a while. And we ended up having to fight,
Starting point is 00:05:55 where I essentially banned him from bringing her up with me. If it's not work-related, also adding to it was the fact that he started taking extra work every now and then and working overtime. And while I essentially thought it was just to earn extra money, I later found out
Starting point is 00:06:14 it was simply because he knew she usually heads home late too, usually after. after most, if not all office employees left. Fast forward to a few days back. Weekend happened. Husband was out with his friends, and my laptop was at the repair, so I used his laptop.
Starting point is 00:06:36 Without his permission, we are relatively free with each other's devices. Like, we never have a reason to use each other's devices, but if for some reason we did, the other one wouldn't mind. So I didn't think much of it. I had put on some vids on auto play as background noise as I did some work. When I opened his PC folder and on the left quick access bar, there was a folder with our boss's daughter's name. I had to click it.
Starting point is 00:07:07 And when I did, I actively couldn't believe what I was seen. A folder of over 1,000 plus pictures of her. Screenshots from Instagram, another app, any and every pick he could find of her, and an insane number of pictures just taken without her consent, like with either a hidden camera or his phone at the office, ranging from her just sitting or working to some from a high enough angle to get cleavage or down blouse, and even a few under-the-table shots. though those didn't have anything to show from what I had seen.
Starting point is 00:07:51 This creeped me out beyond anything, since it was almost impossible to place my husband, who I've always known as the sweetest guy for the six years we have been married, as someone who would do something like this. I was shocked and just didn't really know how to react. If I should feel disgusted or sad, angry, I didn't know. But then it got to be.
Starting point is 00:08:16 worse. Oh my God, how does this get worse? I used search to look up her name on his laptop and found something that basically turned any form of sorrow or sadness I would have felt into pure disgust. He basically had a folder, poorly hidden deep in a number of folders, just full of photoshopped pictures of her, some solo, some with him, some with other members of the office, and some just absolutely vile and disgusting. I deleted all traces of me, having seen or searched for those, though I doubt it was necessary, since my husband isn't the most tech savvy to begin with, took a picture of some of the stuff I found and left the laptop. I was furious, but I also didn't want him to know yet, so I acted normal that night, and then the next day I called up my cousin,
Starting point is 00:09:11 she was pregnant and her husband was away and asked her if she needed help and used that as an excuse to move in and help her for a bit. I have talked to my husband, though limited, mostly through text and occasional at work, but for the last four days I have been living with my cousin. Honestly, I am disgusted, but I also don't know what to do exactly. Like I feel a mixture of being cheated on, which I know he didn't do. anything with her, but still, I can't explain it. But on top of that, I feel disgusted that my husband was this sort of man. But even talking about it to my friends or family feels weird. I tried to share with my cousin, but the embarrassment didn't allow me to say anything. I just don't know what to do right now. I can't stay here forever. I'll have to head back sooner rather than later, but I also don't
Starting point is 00:10:07 think I can just go back home and pretend that none of this happened, or I didn't see any of this. So I thought this was the best way to stay anonymous and ask for some form of advice. What should I do? And how should I progress? And then the OP makes an update post a few hours later, and let's get into it. So a lot happened in the course of the few hours. I honestly wanted to wait a few more days to cool off myself and then do whatever was needed. But some of the comments did have me worried. If he got the idea and deleted everything, if he did something harmful in the meantime, and as my friend pointed out,
Starting point is 00:10:48 if he somehow, as unlikely as it might be, found the post and put two and two together, we ended up going over around 4 p.m.ish, knowing we'd gave a few hours to collect whatever. I made sure to copy everything on the two folders to a flash drive and took a video of it being from his laptop too, in case that was something needed. Then, as another comment suggested,
Starting point is 00:11:16 we looked for my name, which came out with nothing but regular pictures and stuff. After that, my friend asked me to look up co-worker's names, and when I did, that hit some results. With four other co-worker's names, all women, but none to the same extent as the boss's daughter, like between the downloaded pictures,
Starting point is 00:11:40 creep shots and edited pictures, all four of them combined didn't match hers. All the folders were hidden the same way. Inside a few layers of new folders, like one folder inside, another, inside another, etc., up to like eight to nine new folders, we took those two. Then my friend pointed out that some of those
Starting point is 00:12:04 might be files he received, since the file names were different and some were similar to WhatsApp files, as she pointed out. This is something I hadn't noticed, but the edited files were definitely named differently, some being daughter's name plus adult video action, and then others just being something like image, number, and then just a list of numbers and letters,
Starting point is 00:12:31 or something along that line, which my friend said are pictures he received in WhatsApp. We confirmed that they were indeed, received from WhatsApp in the picture information. This ultimately made me do something that I shouldn't have done, since it could have blown up in my face, but it had made me anxious and I needed answers. So I asked my friends if they would stay till my husband gets back.
Starting point is 00:12:58 They agreed, and I decided to take that time to pack my bags, just necessary things for now. My friends did say he's logged into Facebook, but they didn't want to check his Facebook without me. And by the time they told me that, it was already time for him to come back. So we decided to not do anything. We waited and waited until he finally came back.
Starting point is 00:13:23 He was surprised to see us. But they didn't seem to suspect anything, and I told him to sit down. He did. And I think that's when he noticed his laptop on the couch and asked what was going on. I told him I saw some things related to the boss's daughter
Starting point is 00:13:41 and that I wanted an explanation he tried to get angry at first but quickly dropped that act I told him I wanted to hear what he had to say and then decide what to do he said he was fine talking but only if my friends waited
Starting point is 00:14:02 in the dining or another room as he wanted to explain things to me me alone. My friends were hesitant, but I told them it's fine, and that if they hear any issues to send the drive link to the boss, this was a bluff that I wish I had thought about before he came, but I told them that I saved everything on a Google drive and would not hesitate sending it to the boss if he tried anything. He assured me, he wouldn't act up, and asked me what I wanted to know. At that point, I really wanted to hit him. Just the look on his face, he looked guilty, like he was looking for excuses but failing or something. I don't know, but I really hated it.
Starting point is 00:14:54 But I stayed calm and told him I say a lot of things, including all of the pictures of her, the edits, and a few other things. And I think the O.P. He meant to say I saw a lot of things, but they said say. Anyways, and then I asked him to explain. He kept asking me exactly what I wanted to know. And it was becoming obvious that he was either stalling for an excuse or trying to see how much I knew. I told him finally that I saw the pictures,
Starting point is 00:15:25 the hidden camp picks and even the edits. He pleaded with me to not get mad and hear him out. And I told him, I'll consider it. He took a minute and told me that he had noticed he was growing more and more attracted to her. Intimately, Nandy apparently struggled with these emotions a lot, which is why he did that, and that he wanted to release his tension without harming anyone. Which is why he made those and kept it to himself. I then asked him to see his WhatsApp and the color on his phone.
Starting point is 00:16:04 face almost drained uh-oh has he been sending these pictures to other people or has he been asking people to you know edit these pictures for him i don't know like why would he have it on watsap and then move it to his computer like i feel like he'd be communicating with people but i could be wrong let's continue the op he then says the color on his face almost drained he told me i knew he didn't use WhatsApp, but I told him I checked his Google Play to see what apps he had installed. Another lie, but I was sure he was using WhatsApp, so I still went with it. After a bit, he handed me the phone and told me to not overreact. I took his phone and searched around for a bit.
Starting point is 00:16:48 He has a lot of pointless apps downloaded, and it was hard to spot, especially since it wasn't even on the home screen, but on a folder file inside. the side screen thingy Android has on the third page. Sorry if the explanation it confuses you. I open it to find just one group chat with three other colleagues. Members of the team he is in basically. And it was just filled with pictures of this girl. Oh no.
Starting point is 00:17:24 Creep shots taken from different areas, zoomed in for the most part from today. like literally a few minutes before he hand me the phone. A lot of conversations in Bangla about fantasies on how they would have had intimacy with her. Scrolling up, it keeps getting worse and worse. I won't get into the details on the specifics, but a lot of it was about wanting to force themselves on her. God.
Starting point is 00:17:55 As a revenge on the boss kind of thing. but with her acting as the boss, and some even full on went thought out scenarios, where they're planning out what they do and whatnot, if you ever read something and just faced pure whiplash, that was me at that moment. Literally unable to process it properly. He kept apologizing, telling me how much he loved me
Starting point is 00:18:22 and that there was all just to keep himself in control, and that it was ultimately just harmless fantasizing. well obviously it's not harmless he's literally it's not fantasizing at all he's literally taking creep shots of her like that's not that's gone way past the point of fantasizing this guy's a predator um and the op he continues and says i only caught bits and pieces of what he was saying before just turning on the screen recorder and scrolling recording the conversations and the more i scrolled up the more vile it got the conversation did predate my husband joining it seemed but that didn't really matter.
Starting point is 00:18:58 He was very actively taking part in it. I got a good chunk of it, but it didn't seem to end. So I simply went to the chat media, and even that was a huge scrolling down of picks, creep shots from phones, fakes, etc. I ended up getting as much as I could and sending it over to me, making sure it's saved on my phone.
Starting point is 00:19:20 All the while, he kept begging me to forgive him and not ruin his life in his career. Sorry, and I quote, our lives and careers. Let me say that again, our lives and careers. That's crazy he's lumping his wife in there with his degeneracy. But let's continue. The OP says, I told him I felt betrayed. And I told him I was disgusted at the man he was.
Starting point is 00:19:48 And through his apologizing, he kept insisting it didn't really hurt anyone. But I told him it hurt me. and if she found out, it would hurt her too. And he simply pleaded with me not to tell her. For a while, we just cried. For different reasons, I presume. But the entire time, he kept switching between how he's sorry and how he loves me, to how it's not as bad as I'm making it out to be,
Starting point is 00:20:14 and how they were just messing around online and weren't hurting anyone. My friends chicked in on me a few times, but didn't interfere. after a while I pulled myself up and told him that I don't see myself staying with him and that I want a divorce. He pleaded with me not to do so, but I simply said that I didn't want to listen to his excuses. I then told him that I wanted to take the laptop, and he froze. I was half expecting him to reject me, but he simply begged me not to show this to the boss or the daughter. I told him I wasn't sure if I wanted to do that, which was a lie, and that I'm thinking it over. I told him to not delete the WhatsApp conversations or tell the others, and that if he
Starting point is 00:21:05 does, I will send everything to the boss. Ultimately, I want to talk to the daughter first and then decide what to do and how to tell the father, but that we will have to wait, I guess. There was a bit more pleading and I simply left it on, I don't know what I want to do. I need to think it over and we'll let him know and told him not to contact me in the meantime. And that was all we said as we left with his laptop. I do hope he doesn't alert his friends, but even if he did, it wouldn't matter. Since the screen recordings has their names and numbers on the group chat and a huge chunk of stuff they said. The thing is, since nothing physical happened, I know the police won't take it seriously 90% of the time. With the only possible time they might take it seriously is if the girl
Starting point is 00:22:01 herself took action. So I intend to give her all of what I have and let her proceed with whatever actions she chooses to take there. I do wish I had waited to talk to lawyers before taking things this far, but the fear and emotions had me wrapped up, and I just ended up taking action. It seems to have worked out, but I don't know. Husband seemed pretty defeated today, but considering how little it feels like I know him, I honestly can't tell with him anymore. I will see how things play out, and maybe do one final update, but from my understanding, things will probably just end with a divorce and him getting fired. Still, thank you for all the help,
Starting point is 00:22:48 even just snapping me into action. When we were leaving, he was basically sobbing and begging for forgiveness or claiming how it's all just a mistake and nothing actually happened, to the point where I almost did feel bad for him. Almost. But I don't think I can feel sympathy
Starting point is 00:23:05 after those chats and whatnot. My friends, luckily, was also there to remind me that regardless of what, he says his actions are not for me to forgive. Right now, I don't really know what to feel. My mind's a bit of a mess. And things are processing weirdly. Apologies in advance, if some of this is incoherent or feels like there are blanks in between stuff, trust me. There are blanks in my head too right now. A few things I did want to specify. On the post, some people took the he's not tech savvy, bit as though he isn't good with tech at all, which isn't the case.
Starting point is 00:23:44 I think of tech savvy as being great with tech, and that's what I meant, that he's not that great, but he is still decent. We work in RMG offices. A lot of our work is with Modaris, Photoshop, and Illustrator, and he is decent with them. I just meant that in a sense that he's not the type to hide folders or passcode wall stuff, if that makes sense. Second is hidden cam Was less talking about actual hidden camera And more just the style of it Most of those are taken via phone
Starting point is 00:24:17 And as we now found out Multiple phones from different people Third, some people thought she was a minor She isn't, she is 20 as of this year But that still doesn't change the fact That he knew her when she was a minor And that they started this when she was 19 Fourthly, I've been going back and forth with who to tell exactly, and while she is still young,
Starting point is 00:24:43 she is strong, and as much as I hate to say this after hearing it from my husband for so long, she is mature for her age. And as she's directly involved, I think it's only fair to tell her and let her decide who she wants to share with these. I have made attempts to reach out, preferably outside work, and I'll let her decide how she wants to approach everything from her side. Fifth, am I worried about my job too? A bit for a few reasons. Firstly, because me and my husband were both recommended by my relative, and now all of a sudden, that changes to someone my relative recommended creeping on the boss's daughter. And secondly, to cause, I will technically the ex-wife of the guy who stalker her,
Starting point is 00:25:28 to her and the boss. So that's something I need to worry about as well. But regardless, I think it's still the right decision to make. yeah, 100% the right decision to make. But lastly, about the divorce, I am worried for it, for sure. But we don't necessarily have a giant fortune. And most of our finances are on our own, with a very small fund saved up that we usually keep for trips and such.
Starting point is 00:25:54 And I personally think I have enough proof on me too. But still, I will get legal counseling within the next few days, preferable before things blow up on his face. I'm currently staying at a friend for a while while I look for a new flat. I wanted to move in with my parents for a bit, but my gut is telling me that's the last place I should go once the news breaks. And now let's get into some of the top comments. One user says, wow, after reading about the WhatsApp messages,
Starting point is 00:26:29 words can't describe the disgust I have for these men. Here is another example. why I don't trust men. A group of your employees secretly filming you and fantasizing about R-wording you, I hope this follows them forever. I hope they don't get the opportunity to fall through on their fantasies. And yeah, it is just unbelievable how disturbing that entire group chat is. I mean, they're all just fantasizing about R-wording or... God, that is just unbelievable. And the O.P. response to this comment and says, the thing is, it's not even just like chat, on our wording her it was like full-on detailed sessions or role play i don't know how to describe it but like
Starting point is 00:27:13 they're going over what they're doing how she's reacting etc and a lot of it was the cruelty of it too oh my god like describing she'd be sobbing as they did it or how they're streaming it from their devices etc these guys are monsters oh my god i'm just glazing over most of this stuff, just know it still gets worse than what I just said. Man, these guys need to be arrested. I hope they do. Someone else says, um, he said he did it to keep himself in control with his growing attraction to her. Does that mean keeping himself from our wording her? And the OPEE responds and says, I asked him. He never elaborated. Just repeated that it's to keep himself in control. That was the impression. That was the
Starting point is 00:28:06 I got too, though I shared this with my friend who was there and she thinks he's just trying to play holier than thou, like I'm making a sacrifice to keep myself under control kind of deal. Someone else says, I wish you could go to prison for this. And the OPEE responds and says, if we were situated somewhere else, he would definitely go to jail. But here, it's unlikely, at least from my side. Higher chances. if the daughter decides to press charges, which she hopefully will. But still, there has been cases here of serious cybercrimes that either went unpunished or let go with a few days in prison.
Starting point is 00:28:49 So it wouldn't shock me either way. And I really, really hope that the boss's daughter presses charges. But then the OP comes back about a week later with an update and let's get into it. This reads, I think this will be my only update. I saw a few people were asking for updates before too, but I honestly needed some time to myself too and wanted to see how things played out before making an update. So, as I said in the last edit and some of the comments, I ended up going to the boss's daughter, showed her everything I had, and told her I had the laptop too if she needed.
Starting point is 00:29:31 I could tell it was a good bit for her to process initially, but she said she's used to stuff like this. Yeah, F this place, honestly. And so, compose herself. Afterwards, she asked if it would be fine for me to help her go through the screenshots and screen recordings and pictures, since she'd rather not have to go into checking the details herself, and I agreed. We sat at a local food chain and basically wrote out a detailed HR report, like not a report to the HR, but a report from the HR regarding that team. I went over the different aspects of the text caught on the screen recording and the edited pictures as well as the creep shots of her. She reassured me that I won't be facing any consequences for this and to leave talking to her father to her.
Starting point is 00:30:21 She asked if I were to be called to the police station, if I'd be willing to go, and I said I would. She concluded that while in other areas, this could have been used to better punish them, high chances are that this won't do much, other than maybe a few days worth of jail, but that she would still be going to the police, as this will be good way to make sure if they ever considered doing something again, this could be used to screw them over.
Starting point is 00:30:51 As for their jobs, she said she would keep them for a few days, while the filing and reports work its way up, then fire them on the spot with no reference or experienced certificate. basically rendering any attempts of showing work experience in this company impossible. And should they try, future hirers will be sent the HR report we built. We concluded the meeting there, with her telling me not to worry, and just not interact with them at work. After that, I spoke to a lawyer, showed him everything I had, and while he took a small bit,
Starting point is 00:31:27 said that things can be done relatively easily. thing is, it's not like me or my husband have that much joint property or wealth, that there would be much of a dirty breakup financially. But from the looks of things, so far at least, things seem to be going in my favor. My husband did call a few times and texted to see if I would reconsider, but I blocked him more or less. Didn't want any part of his BS honestly. Good for the OP. This is the part where the shitstorm I had mentioned. started calls and messages from relatives all with the purpose of letting me know that these things happen and that I shouldn't hold it against him hold on that is crazy calls from relatives saying
Starting point is 00:32:17 things like this happen you know just fantasizing about our wording your boss's daughter shit like that happens what are these people talking about these people are crazy I hope the OP just blocks everybody. Then the OP continues and says, I talked to my mother and found out that what he told her and a few other relatives, including his parents, were. I got jealous because he accidentally showed interest in the boss's daughter, but never planned to act on it.
Starting point is 00:32:45 This caused almost everyone but his mother to side with him, while his mother called me to apologize, saying she was ashamed of what her son had said. I had originally told my husband, I wouldn't blow this out of her point, but ended up telling my mother and his parents, the former who responded exactly as I thought she would. She told me, it's not like he acted on it.
Starting point is 00:33:10 That's crazy, and that this much is nothing to ruin a marriage over. This didn't surprise me since when one of my aunts got cheated on, she and her other sister had essentially taken the stance of, just forgive it and ignore it. move on and don't bring it up, things will be happy. My mother and I had a huge back and forth where she brought up family reputation, embarrassment if family finds out what he did, embarrassment if I'm a divorcee in my 30s, yeah, that's a thing here sadly, and yeah, 29 is still reaching 30s.
Starting point is 00:33:47 We ended the call on pretty bad terms, but it was expected. The family itself is more or less on the same stance, with only some choosing to stay away. And even now when I ended up sharing the exact reason with a few members, they responded, let it go, and fix their relationship. Or something akin to that. That is just unbelievable, man. The pleasant surprise came from telling his parents, though,
Starting point is 00:34:14 which took my side. After things blew up, his mother apologized to me, telling me she was ashamed of what her son did. While the father told me, he will make sure my husband won't be causing any issues for me, in the divorce or in general. I was honestly expecting them to take his side like my family, so this was a welcome surprise. Yesterday, the team were called into the boss's office along with some police. I don't know what was said and done, but they were in there for a long time,
Starting point is 00:34:46 and by the time they all left, they just looked defeated, especially my husband. It seems she did exactly what she said she'd do and fired them. I don't know the specifics of it. I don't necessarily intend to ask either. As for me personally, it's been rough. It's easy to get angry when everything is happening. It's the moment when things are calm, that memories and feelings get the best of things,
Starting point is 00:35:15 but I will be fine. I get to keep my job, which is huge in my opinion. The whole thing with family is, getting much better, it seems, got a bit worse after the firing. I have my stuff and I've moved in with a friend. For a few days, while I look for a smaller apartment. As for husband, I don't exactly know, but I assume he will be moving in with his parents, who are pretty annoyed at him. The apartment we stayed in was something we both contributed to live in, so without income, I can't see him maintaining it at all. Honestly, this is probably it. I don't really see myself making any more
Starting point is 00:35:57 updates to this. It's been a mess, but still, I want to thank everyone for the love and support. It really helped a lot. I haven't really thought out the response to well. Might have missed parts of stuff if I did. I will try to answer anything I can. But other than that, that might be it. And now, let's get into some of the top comments. One user says, it would be nice to do a parent swap. Your husband can go live with your pro-R-word parents, and you can keep his parents who have morals. Your family is happy with their new creep son,
Starting point is 00:36:33 and you get a set of parents who are actually worth something. And the OPE responds and says, This may be chuckle. Thank you for that. It was a nice breath of fresh air. Someone else says, I genuinely want another update when the dust settles. and they're in jail or whatever.
Starting point is 00:36:52 And what their wives do with this information. I'm really impressed by you. And the OPEE responds and says, sadly though, I don't see it happening. In general, stuff like this isn't really a priority for police here. My guess is, the only reason they were here was for intimidation, considering they weren't taken in or anything.
Starting point is 00:37:14 The only real thing is, they won't be able to use any experience from this job and any other job, without having their HR report and reason for why they got fired. And someone else says, Just wanted to say I'm really proud of what you did. Also your family saying the embarrassment of being a divorcee at 30 is absolutely ridiculous. I think staying married and miserable in a marriage past 30
Starting point is 00:37:40 where someone is being 100% creepy to borderline cheating is embarrassing and sad. You only have one life, you only make things better, if you take action, not stay with someone in case a curtain switcher or Twitter might think something of you. And then the OP responds and says, yeah, it's just society here isn't the most accepting of this or divorce in general. It's definitely gotten a lot better in recent years, but it ultimately depends on what values the family grew up with. So people my age and younger, like newer generations, are more okay with it, mostly, but older people. like those from my parents' generation, aren't as much.
Starting point is 00:38:23 And that is the last update we have ever received from the OP. And man, it's just insane and so gross how there was three people at that company who were totally fine with just creeping on the, well, you can't even call it creeping on, but just like doing downright horrific things in a group chat together, taking creep shots, outlining, disgusting, R-word fans, fantasies. And like the O.P. said, like imagining her sobbing and begging them to stop. Like,
Starting point is 00:38:59 it's so horrifying. It is so bad. It is so bad. I feel so bad for the O.P.'s boss or the boss's daughter. I mean, like, I can't imagine, you know, learning that your own colleagues are doing that to you and imagining those things and congregating and talking about that against. to you. And then the OP lost her husband, and she has to go through a divorce, and, you know, she has to go through that entire thing, which is just horrible. And also, she kind of lost her parents in a way. Her parents are no longer proud of her, and they kind of disowned her in a way because she's a divorcee at 30, and they're like, that's embarrassing or whatever. It's like, you would rather me be married to a R-word fantasist and someone who's just a complete,
Starting point is 00:39:45 degenerate and freak and predator. It's just insane, but I really hope that the O.P. is doing better now. Terrified that my 25 female husband, who is 28 male, has been having intimacy with me while I'm asleep. Now I'm pregnant. For some context, I have a serious medical condition that requires some pretty heavy medication. It does a lot of things, including destroy my intimate drive and knock me out for long periods of time. My husband and I were married before I was diagnosed, and he's supported me through my diagnosis and treatment. He is a wonderful man. We used to have a very active, intimate life. And it has been a considerable strain on our marriage that I never feel in the mood. I feel like a terrible wife in this regard. And I miss being able to do what we both enjoy.
Starting point is 00:40:49 To be clear, when I take my medication, I am dead to the world. You could blast a fire alarm next to me, and I would not wake up. You could pick me up and toss me around, and I might not wake up. lately i felt worse than normal really sick dizzy uncomfortable etc i went to the doctor scared i might be sick with the pandemic virus and it turns out i'm pregnant five weeks but i haven't had intimacy with my husband in at least two months maybe more i did not cheat on him i was not assaulted by anyone anywhere that I know of. This was not immaculate conception. I told my husband, and he was surprised. It's probably a million in one chance I got pregnant due to the medication I'm on in my condition. He was shocked, then excited, and I was just so relieved he didn't accuse me of cheating that I didn't
Starting point is 00:41:55 stop to consider why he didn't. It's been a few days. I've been thinking about when I first started taking my medication. It was hard for him to adjust to me not wanting to have intimacy. And he used to joke that I could just lay there and watch TV while we do it. Or here's what makes me scared. He used to joke that he could just have intimacy with me while I'm sleeping in that way I don't have to deal with it. And he can be satisfied. He's mentioned this a few times before. and I always let it drop. I've started thinking about all the times I woke up in the morning and had uncomfortable pelvic pressure
Starting point is 00:42:41 that usually only comes from me after I have intimacy. My husband likes to be rough, and I don't really mind. We were always pretty wild in bed or adventurous, or bruises I've had that I can't explain. I confronted my husband about this, about me being scared he did this to me, and at the least why he wasn't surprised the day, dates didn't match up. He was angry. I would accuse him of something so horrible and insist that I'm
Starting point is 00:43:09 just misremembering the last time we had intimacy. The medication does play with my memory sometimes, but I remember the last time we had intimacy. I remember every time we have intimacy now because I don't enjoy it. I don't want to panic. I don't want to talk myself into being convinced he's been having intimacy with me while I'm asleep. And I don't want to talk myself out of the possibility just to protect our marriage. But I'm terrified. This is the only possibility I can come up with. And if it's true, I don't know what to do. I've been heartbroken for a while over the idea that I wouldn't be able to have kids. Now I'm going to have a baby and I'm so, so happy. But what if this baby happened because of what my husband did?
Starting point is 00:43:59 And then the OP makes an edit and says, I just want to say the response to this has been insane. Thank you guys so much. I'm really lost and I don't know what to think or do. I'm going to take some time to think about this, get additional information and resources depending on however this is going to go and figure it out. Just to be clear, however, because there are too many responses to answer directly,
Starting point is 00:44:25 no, I have never given permission for my husband to have intimacy with me while I'm sleeping. Yes, I have asked him if I have ever instigated something while sleep. Sleep walked, sleep spoke, or did anything in my sleep related to intimacy? And he answered, no. We have never had intimacy outside of a time when I was fully cognizant and aware of what's happening. And yes, I am keeping the baby regardless of what happened. If people are interested, I will post an update when there is something to write. Again, thank you. Thank you for all the support and opinions.
Starting point is 00:45:06 They all matter. And now let's get into some of the top comments. One person says, Holy F, that's intense. Are you supposed to be having those reactions to your medication? Like, is that normal to be completely passed out? Also, him joking about having intimacy with you while passed down, it's very scary. I would ask him again. I would say you don't understand
Starting point is 00:45:32 how you could be pregnant because you haven't had intimacy in the past five weeks. Don't let them make you think you're crazy or misremembering. In the OP response and says, I'm definitely in the minority with the severity of my reaction to the medication. But even with what it does to me sometimes, it's still the best option for my treatment. The thing is, when he was joking around about having intimacy, when I slept, it never came off as outright creepy. I mean, the idea is creepy, but he never sounded creepy or sinister or anything like that. It was always playful and with laughter. He never made me feel outright uncomfortable, and I thought we were just joking. When I confronted him, it didn't seem like he was attempting to gaslight me about the dates not matching up. He seemed
Starting point is 00:46:22 sure I was misremembering because of my medication. But I absolutely know we did not have intimacy five weeks ago. At least intimacy I participated in. Another commenter says, either he had intimacy with you without your consent, or you have problems with your memory, possibly caused by your medication. You should try to rule out memory problems. For example, by talking to your doctor and asking whether a medication could do that. And the OPE, he responds and says, I do absolutely admit that I have issues with my memory because of the medication. It makes things I did or said really hazy,
Starting point is 00:47:04 almost like it happened in a dream and not in real life, but I'm very, very aware of when I'm having intimacy and when I'm not. The medication makes me very tired, which is part of why my intimate drive is gone. So when I do agree to have intimacy, it's more of a service I'm performing for the, the benefit of my husband than anything else. All the enjoyment is gone.
Starting point is 00:47:29 So I remember when it happens because it's just a chore and one I don't enjoy. This is a normal side effect of the medication as well. Nothing abnormal. And another commenter says, I understand this is a miracle baby, but I would very seriously consider an operation to have the baby removed if I was you. If this man is a R-wordist, then do you want him having rights to a child being alone with that child? And by the way, this comptor was downvoted, and the O.P. replied and said,
Starting point is 00:48:04 I can tell you absolutely. Without any doubt in my mind, I will never get rid of this baby. It doesn't matter where it came from or what happened to conceive it. This is my miracle baby. I will likely never be pregnant again or have this opportunity again. I can figure everything else out later, but this baby is the one thing I'm sure about. And another commenter says, Hey, so I'm an R-word crisis counselor who also struggles with brain fog. Trust yourself. You know deep down the last time you had intimacy was the last time you had intimacy.
Starting point is 00:48:41 Don't let him gaslight you. Edit, I should say to me, it seems like he's trying to rug sweep and gaslight you. I see what you're seeing through. is what I meant. If you need to talk privately, feel free to reach out. I'm happy to help you find a local S-A hotline. They can offer you free confidential services. Edit.
Starting point is 00:49:01 It's been pointed out that I shouldn't offer to talk privately, which I completely understand. And the OPE responds and says, The thing is, I know, I know, I know. I haven't enjoyed intimacy since this started. When I have intimacy with my husband now, it is not enjoyable. So when I do give in and have intimacy with him, I'm very aware of when it's happening in terms of the date.
Starting point is 00:49:26 But I've never had a problem with my husband lying to me. He's a very honest person. And when he looks me in the eye and tells me we had intimacy to conceive our baby, I can't see any deception. So now I'm terrified he's a sociopath master liar. Or I have lost my mind. Another commenter says, is this medication safe for the baby? Did he consider this? And the OPE says, I'm not taking it right now while I'm referred to a specialist to find out if it's safe to take while pregnant.
Starting point is 00:49:56 My husband is acting very concerned, but I don't know if everything is enacted at this point. And then the OPE comes back two weeks later with an update, and let's get into it. I wanted to give an update as to what's been happening in the past two weeks. My first post got a crazy amount of attention, and lots of people were really kind and helpful. and I want them to know I'm okay. This is going to be really, really long, just to be warned. To clarify, the medication I'm on for my condition is taken at night because it affects me the way it does, completely knocking me out.
Starting point is 00:50:35 To reassure people, I would not be taking this medication if I had a baby to take care of, regardless of my condition. And I discontinued almost immediately after five, finding out I was pregnant, nor does the medication impact my fertility. That has to do with my condition. After I made my post and read through about 300 comments, I think I went a little crazy. I convinced myself that I was making it all up in my head. I doubted everything I thought I knew, and I doubted myself. I went to the hospital to speak with my doctor about the medication and its severe side effects. I asked if it could make me engage in any intimate action.
Starting point is 00:51:17 while asleep. I asked if it could make me misremember stuff. I asked if I was going crazy. The answer to all of these questions is no. The medication doesn't make any of this even a possibility. And no, my husband doesn't have intimacy somnia. Neither would the medication mess up my memory so much that I might not remember intimacy or consenting to it. This medication is not a sedative. After emailing with my OBGYN, who absolutely assured me her prediction of five weeks could very much be off by as much as the three that would explain my pregnancy, I had to accept that even if some stuff didn't add up, maybe I was destroying three lives for nothing. I never woke up with any stuff inside me. I tend to sleep in just underwear and don't remember that being missing or wrong in any way. The pelvic pressure could be explained by the pregnancy, the bruise, the bruise, Ruses? I don't know, but people bruise themselves all the time and I don't know. I talked to my counselor, provided by the hospital twice. I made the choice to seek out professional help long term for what happened. Things were bad with my husband, though. I accused him of assaulting me.
Starting point is 00:52:34 That destroys a relationship. I was pissed at myself. I've kind of spent almost the past two weeks locking myself in the bedroom, humiliated and embarrassed and feeling like horrible. We didn't really talk much to each other, and if we did, it was about the baby. I think I knew our relationship was over at that point. I went two days ago to get another ultrasound at seven weeks, just to check on the baby because I've been feeling weird, and to get the pregnancy dated again, so I could maybe feel less insane.
Starting point is 00:53:07 My OBGYN had a better look at the fetus this time. The original five weeks prediction was wrong, even with a little bit of buffer time to be safe, I was most likely eight weeks or just about as close as you can get. We absolutely got pregnant during the night I remember having intimacy. And to clarify, we never used protection because my husband doesn't like using the protection. We are in a monogamous relationship, and I've been told that since I was a teenager,
Starting point is 00:53:36 the chances of getting pregnant are slim to none. I was even more humiliated and embarrassed. We just fought after that, and he got really mean and cold. A couple nights ago, we were watching a movie, and it was the closest I felt to him since it started. The fact that he even wanted to watch a movie with me felt like a victory. When it was over, he asked if I really thought he could have R-worded me. I started crying, and he started yelling, demanding an answer. Before I could answer, he started laughing,
Starting point is 00:54:11 and said he couldn't get me aroused enough to have intimacy with me if he tried. It was just him being mean about my health. My medication doesn't just make me disinterested in intimacy. It makes it really hard for me to get turned on. When we have intimacy, we have to use tons of, just basically she talks about their intimate habits, and she says, I told them that wasn't funny. And he said he really thought it was. We started to fight about my accusation and how it made him feel.
Starting point is 00:54:47 When I tried to tell him how sorry I was and how I was just really scared, he wasn't the person I thought he was. He said I tried to ruin his life. Then he admitted he tried to violate me a couple of times while I was asleep. It never got anywhere. So he gave up and that it isn't our word. I started screaming at him, demanding to know if he was telling the truth. I started hyperventilating.
Starting point is 00:55:14 He started screaming back that he never R-worded me. He only used his fingers to do stuff, only because he was desperate. He said, I really hurt him accusing him of R-word, and it can't be R-word because we're married, and it was just his fingers and not his junk. And then he said he'd given me another act of intimacy. while I was sleeping once trying to get me, um, how do I say this? Um,
Starting point is 00:55:47 basically he just performed another intimate act, trying to then be, allow them to have intimacy, but she was asleep still. So that's our word. Um, and that was only when he'd stopped. He also admitted to using my hand to do stuff to him while I slept, but only a couple of times.
Starting point is 00:56:08 So that's the truth of it. Our baby was conceived. while I participated, but my husband admitted to touching me while I slept. But it's not our word because we're married? He believes that. He stands by it. And I'm crazy for thinking otherwise according to him. Maybe I am crazy. He's my husband. And I never heard of marital R word until my first post. I don't know what to do now. I don't have any family outside of him. I have some friends, but the pandemic is happening and I can't impose on any of them. We're probably not that close anyway.
Starting point is 00:56:46 Making friends is hard for me. I don't have money. I live paycheck to paycheck normally and I'm out of work now. I'm scared to go too. I'm not stupid. Staying is stupid. We didn't sleep together after he made what he did. He slept in the living room.
Starting point is 00:57:01 I slept in the bedroom. I think I slept an hour, scared he'd come back and pick a fight again. It's been like that for two nights now. This feels like the end of everything. And I just don't know where to go from here, or I go from here. He doesn't think he did anything wrong, and he's so mad at me for saying otherwise. Honestly, I'm okay. I want people to know that.
Starting point is 00:57:25 Just really lost. I don't know if people care past this point, want another update, whatever. But I truly want to say thank you to everyone who cared. I'm not used to having people who care. even if I don't know you guys, it was really, really nice. I'm going to be okay. Shout out to all the people who thought I'm lying or some person posting a lot of fake stories
Starting point is 00:57:49 all under different throwaway names. I just use the throwaway account because I don't want my real Reddit name tied to this and the community rules said to. Even to the people who said this is fake, thanks for at least making me feel a little less alone. And now let's get into some of the top comments. One person says,
Starting point is 00:58:10 former law enforcement officer here, he did, in fact, R-word you if he did stuff with his fingers or tongue. So while the R-word didn't result in your pregnancy, he, by his own admission, a-worded you.
Starting point is 00:58:27 Marital status does not matter. I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's better that you know. And we have never gotten another updates from the but just how horrifying. And I wonder what ended up happening. I mean, hopefully the O.P was able to divorce this guy because this guy is creepy and just a monster. I mean, I like how he's like, I didn't Rward you, or married. Like, that's crazy. That's insane that he thought that. And I just
Starting point is 00:59:00 feel so bad for the O.P. And hopefully the O.P was able to get the help she needed and reach out to some friends or possibly long-distance family or whatever and get the help she needed and get a support system and hopefully her and her baby are doing better now i think my husband is having an affair with his step-sister oh boy let's get into it just what the title says i believe my 24 female husband who is 24 male and his step-sister, 23 female, are having an affair. My head is spinning and I don't know what to do. My husband's parents got divorced when he was 15 and his dad remarried when he was 17. His stepmom has one daughter.
Starting point is 00:59:52 Let's call her Jess, who was 16 at the time of the marriage. They all lived together for about a year and a half before. he left for college, which is where him and I met freshman year. Our sophomore year just began going to the same school as us. He introduced her to our friend group and she quickly became a part of it. They always seemed more like friends than siblings because obviously their parents didn't marry till they were older, but they'd sometimes refer to each other as bro and sis. Back then I sometimes got the vibe that she was flirting with him, but he never returned it, and I just brushed it off as her personality, and that I was being crazy because, no way, that would happen.
Starting point is 01:00:39 Fast forward to now. We all live in a hometown and see each other pretty often. Jess is single and hasn't had a boyfriend in several years. Her and my husband are still very close. When we are all hanging out together, including their parents, if we're sitting in a boyfriend, on the couch, she will sit up right up against him. Sometimes even put her head on his shoulder if he's showing her videos on his phone. I've always found it odd, but just brushed it off. Of course, they aren't actually related, but it would still be too taboo and weird. So I've never fully let myself have the suspicions. However, over the last six months, things have only been getting weirder. Both my husband and I's birthdays are in April and only a week apart, so over the last
Starting point is 01:01:31 couple of years, we've kind of just combined them and celebrated both at the same time. We have friends and family over, and normally we also receive joint gifts, but this year just got my husband something specific to him. Fairly expensive gaming headphones and a watch, but nothing for me, and she also got him a card and wrote a decent amount in it. I didn't get to read it when we were opening things, and then later on I couldn't find it. When I asked my husband where it was, he brushed it off saying, Oh, he must have accidentally thrown it out with its envelope. But the envelope was still with everything else on the counter.
Starting point is 01:02:10 They've been texting a lot more, and she's also been talking to me less. Remember her and I have been friends for the last five years. Sometimes I'll see text from her pop-up on his phone screen, and there will be hearts, double heart emoji, or the emoji with the heart eyes emojis. This will be while he's holding it and he'll unlock it pretty fast, so I've never really been able to see what they say.
Starting point is 01:02:36 If I ask her to meet up and hang out with me, she's always busy. He also has been going to see her more often, which is kind of a complicated detail because she still lives at home with her mom and his dad, so he just tells me he's going to hang out with his dad for a bit, but I have a feeling it's for her. Him and I have also been less intimate lately. Neither of us have ever had super high intimate drives, but we have always averaged at least twice a week,
Starting point is 01:03:04 and now it's about two to three times a month. What's pushed me over the edge is when we all got together this past July 4th. We were at my father-in-law's house for a big cookout slash pool party. While in the pool, she kept hanging on to him from behind. Picture him giving her a piggyback ride in the water. Splashing him, being overly playful, et cetera. I kept thinking in my head, I was crazy. Because maybe after all these years, they really do have a sibling-like dynamic,
Starting point is 01:03:37 and she's just messing around. But I also caught her staring at me while my husband and I were being close, and she looked angry. Now, cut to the worst of it all. We all were done in the pool and went inside to change. I was with my husband and in his room and right in the middle of us changing, she came in without knocking, randomly asking if she could borrow my hair brush.
Starting point is 01:04:03 My husband didn't have any clothes on. I was horrified and said something like, OMG, you need to knock first. She seemed unfazed and lazily covered her eyes saying, Oh, whatever, he's basically like my brother. My husband seemed kind of embarrassed, but also not as much as you would expect. She left like it was nothing. Since then, she has barely spoken to me at all, and I'm absolutely spiraling at the thought of this. Am I being crazy?
Starting point is 01:04:32 I haven't said anything to him yet about this because I'm so scared to be wrong, and then I'm just accusing him of sleeping with his step-sister. I need others to tell me if they agree with what I've been seen or not. Small update. Thank you to everyone who has responded. When I made this post, I was hoping for validation of my worries, but also scared of this at the same time. I'm trying to keep it together and act normal around him the best I can. Tomorrow he's going over his dad's, so he says.
Starting point is 01:05:04 So I plan to show up there and see what's going on. Another slight update because I know you guys are interested in updates, but not really. yes, I did go to his dad's house Saturday. A lot has happened since then, and I haven't been on my phone much. When I get time later tonight, I will post a full update of what's going on. I will most likely make a new post about it because it's been hard keeping up with the comments on this one. Bear with me as I get my head sorted out. Updating to say, I created a new post to give a full update on what's happened.
Starting point is 01:05:40 And now let's get into some of the top comments. One user says, have they always been more touchy-feely with each other? Sitting clothes on the couch, playing in the pool, etc. Or has this all started recently too? If they are up to something, she isn't trying at all to hide it, which is crazy to me, unless they both think it's so outlandish that no one would really expect it. I honestly think you could be right, but maybe only partially. It sounds to me like she has a thing for him.
Starting point is 01:06:10 him and it's becoming more brazen about it, possibly leading herself up to making him move on him, but I don't think everything you've said also leads to him cheating on you. All these years, has he ever been weird towards her in return? Maybe he's oblivious to how strange she's acting because he doesn't think that way toward her at all. But no, you aren't crazy. Her or both of them aren't acting. right. And the OPE, he responds and says, they've always been kind of playful with each other, which is why I said even back in college, I sometimes got the feeling she was flirting with him.
Starting point is 01:06:51 But the physical closeness was never really a thing, not frequently anyway until about six months ago. I thought this too, that maybe it's one-sided on her end, but him going over the house more often and us not having intimacy as much has me really worried that it's a mutual thing. Another user says, Yeah, that's definitely strange that he's going to his dad's more often. Have you ever verified that when he goes, the parents are actually even home? Maybe next time he says he's heading over there,
Starting point is 01:07:22 you could A, ask to come to, B, follow him there, or C, wait about an hour and then call or text your father-in-law saying, you want to talk to your husband, but your text to him won't deliver. Or something like that, and see if he confirms they're together. And the OPEE responds and says, thank you so much for the suggestion.
Starting point is 01:07:42 He actually told me the other day he plans to go there this Saturday. I may do a combination of your B and C suggestions and follow him there to even see if his dad's car is in the driveway or if anything weird is going on. If the car is missing, I'll call my father-in-law and ask to talk to my husband.
Starting point is 01:08:02 Another user says, truthfully, I don't know any brother or sister duo that acts like that. I know siblings can be close, but not that close. Maybe try to investigate more before springing any accusations on your husband. Seems a little odd to me, though. Yikes. And then the OP response and says,
Starting point is 01:08:24 This is why I haven't been sure of because I have siblings but two sisters, no brothers. Also with step-siblings, I have no idea if it's a different dynamic, especially since they don't live together for very long since they were older. I definitely think I need to actually dig into this. to see if I can find legitimate evidence, but I'm honestly scared. And another commenter says, If I were in your shoes, I'd ask to look through his text messages, together with him sitting right next to you, if he'd prefer.
Starting point is 01:08:56 Don't explain why. You could offer for him to look through your text at the same time, if he'd like to. He shouldn't have anything to hide, and he should hand it right over to you. He will have questions, and I'd suggest you answer them all. honestly, but only after you see his texts. But his reaction to the suggestion will tell you a lot.
Starting point is 01:09:16 If he's angry or tries to say that you're crazy, something's up. If he disappears somewhere with his phone, he's deleting things before he shows you. And then the OP responds and says, I'm worried to do this because if their texts are totally innocent slash I find nothing, I'll have to tell him why I wanted to see it, and I will seem nuts. He's got an iPhone and a MacBook where his texts are synced up, so I might try to get a hold of his
Starting point is 01:09:45 MacBook and read them on my own first. He uses his laptop for work mostly, though, and has a password on it, so I'll have to come up with some excuse about needing to borrow it. And someone responds and says, you were with your husband in his room? You don't share a bedroom?
Starting point is 01:10:02 Maybe that's why she thought it was fine to walk in. She figured you wouldn't be there. And the O.P. responds and says, we were in his room at his dad's house during the party. I'd just call it that out of habit. At our own house, we share a room, of course. And someone responds and says, So let me get this straight.
Starting point is 01:10:21 You were at your in-law's house, where she lives. Yet she went into his room without knocking, knowing you were both changing, asking to borrow your hairbrush, instead of, you know, going into her own bedroom and using her own hairbrush? And the OP responds and says, yes. Obviously, my worry from this is she used it as an excuse to barge in. And another commenter says,
Starting point is 01:10:49 Wow, I'm sorry you even have to think about that. Did you ask him why she didn't get you a birthday present? Also, why didn't you call him out on the envelope thing? I would get to the bottom of this quickly. And the OP responds and says, I mentioned the gifts and said, wow, she really spoiled you. Must be nice. and he just kind of laughed and said, yeah, wow, what a surprise. I didn't say anything about the envelope, but I wish I did. This was at the start of some of the more obvious signs, and I was feeling so confused slash nervous that I didn't really want to push it. And someone responds and says,
Starting point is 01:11:22 that card is saved somewhere in your home. In his office, in his closet, in his drawers, business suitcase, in his tackle box, somewhere he believes you won't be getting into usually. I would search everywhere. while he's out under the guise of spring cleaning. Update me. And then the OP responds and says,
Starting point is 01:11:42 I have looked everywhere for the card. Believe me, I've tried to find it. If it's hidden somewhere, it's not in this house. And another user says, why did she ask for your hairbrush when this is the house she lives in? If this isn't fake, that should have been both of your immediate reactions.
Starting point is 01:12:03 And the OP responds and says, says, her full statement was, hey, can I borrow your hairbrush? I can't find mine. Unfortunately, this is real. And someone responds and says, yeah, something is off. Even if he's not having an affair with her, I bet they've had intimacy with before. And the OP responds and says, back when we were in college, one of our friends asked him about that, not long after he introduced her to us. He seemed genuinely grossed out by the question and said no. At the time, at the time, he said, at the time, time, him and I were still just friends, so I don't think he had a reason to lie about it. I do think something is going on, but I don't think it stems that far back.
Starting point is 01:12:45 And then the O.P. comes back about three weeks later with an update, and let's get into it. This reads, hey, everyone, sorry that it's been so long since I made my original post about this. If you haven't seen it, you can find out on my profile. to say that our family has totally imploded since I last posted would be an understatement. Uh-oh. So much has happened that I never expected or was prepared for, so I apologize that I kind of ghosted all of you. But this has been really hard. Just an FYI, I will be mentioning text messages a fair amount, and it will be paraphrasing.
Starting point is 01:13:23 Leaving off from my last update, I did go to his dad's house that weekend that my husband told me he was going to see him. When I got there, only my husband's car was in the driveway. I wasn't sure what to do. If I should try calling his dad, calling my husband, or what? I decided to just go in because I didn't want to play games. I walk in and hear his and Jess's voices coming from the kitchen, and it sounded like they were yelling. Even now, I couldn't tell what they were talking.
Starting point is 01:14:01 saying. I was so full of adrenaline as I approached them. It was like I was watching them on mute or something and not actually hearing what was happening. He spotted me and looked like a deer in the headlights. And all I could muster up was to say, what's going on? I stared at them for a couple seconds and then my fight or flight kicked in. I'm very non-confrontational, so my instinct was to turn around and run. He chased after me and pulled me into a guest. room to talk. Again, I asked what was going on, that he's been acting so weird and so is Jess, and point blank asked if he was cheating on me. He seemed shocked at the question, but then out of nowhere started bawling his eyes out. I've never seen my husband cry before. He said that no,
Starting point is 01:14:52 he's not cheating, but has something to tell me but couldn't do it there and need to leave slash for us to go back to our house. At first I protested and said, No, I needed to know right then and there, but he was still having a breakdown, begging me, so I agreed. We left his car there and drove home together and mine, but I sat in silence the whole ride as he cried and was trying to collect himself.
Starting point is 01:15:17 Oh my God, what happened? The OP continues and says, When we got home, we sat in the living room, and I once again asked him, what was happening, and my patients had run thin. Then out came his word vomit. He told me that in college, our junior slash Jess's sophomore year, after him and a bunch of our friends had gone to a party, we were dating by this time, but I wasn't there that night. I'd come home for the weekend to hang out with family. That was in town,
Starting point is 01:15:46 and he got really drunk. Our guy friends kind of ditched him to go hook up, so Jess offered him to crash on her couch for the night. Our school had an on-campus apartment, and she had a single, because she was an RA. He said he woke up at some point after that with his pants down and her on top of him, having intimacy. He told me at the time he felt out of it and didn't really get what it was happening and that's all he remembers was waking up and feeling slash seeing her. He then woke up again a couple hours later and she was asleep in her own bed. So he left and went back to his own dorm. He never told anyone. It took him a long time to even fully understand what had happened, and he felt like he couldn't tell anybody because, one, he felt ashamed and embarrassed. Two, he didn't
Starting point is 01:16:39 think anyone would believe him. Three, he didn't want to be known as the guy that slept with his step-sister. Four, he was afraid of losing me. And five, he was worried about his dad, and if he found out that it could affect or ruin his new marriage, and that his dad is so happy with his step-mom. He told me he basically just acted like nothing happened, even around Jess when we all hung out together. He said him and her never spoke about it or said anything until a couple of years later, when him and I got engaged after graduation. She sent him a text essentially saying she loved him and thought about that night all the time and that why did their parents have to meet and get married, they could be together otherwise, etc.
Starting point is 01:17:23 Essentially, she's obsessed with him. shamefully, I will admit, when he first told me all of this, I wasn't sure what to think or believe, until I saw their text messages. I questioned him saying if this was the case, why are they always talking, why wouldn't he distance himself now that we're married and out of school? He told me, it started up again with her about six months ago, like I said on my original post, when him and I told our families that we decided we wanted to try for a baby. He had a screenshot of the text She sent him the next day Ranting about how he shouldn't do this Marriages aren't permanent
Starting point is 01:18:00 until a baby comes into the mix There's still a chance for them to be honest with their family And for him to leave me She still loves him after all this time, etc He replied saying he loved me And wanted to start a family with me And that he didn't love her in that way
Starting point is 01:18:17 And he never wanted her to bring this up to him ever again That's when her demeanor changed and she said, if he didn't love her, why did he have intimacy with her, and what would their family think? Essentially blackmailing him. I read through as many of the texts as I could handle, and it was always her saying things like, she was thinking about him, she wants to see him, she'd even send texts while we were all together telling him he looks good in that outfit. Sometimes he wouldn't reply, and others he'd be trying to have a normal convo slash steer it in a different direction, and sometimes just telling her to stop it.
Starting point is 01:18:54 The days he's told me he's going to hang out with his dad, it's her begging him to go over there so she can see him or she will tell her mom everything. So he'd agree to go, but he swears nothing has ever happened. That one of their parents would be there a majority of the time and it would just be all of them on the patio or in the living room. That day, he went there to tell her,
Starting point is 01:19:21 he was sick of it and couldn't do it anymore. She could tell people whatever she wants, but he was done, and that's why they were yelling. I sat there taking it all in, and honestly was speechless, as I did not expect any of this. I asked him about our sudden lack of intimacy,
Starting point is 01:19:40 essentially only during my fertile window since we're trying for a baby, but never any other time. And he said all of this being brought up for him mentally has made him shut down about intimacy. He was only doing it for me because I wanted a baby, that it's taken him so long to realize
Starting point is 01:19:56 slash come to terms of the fact that she assaulted him and how this harassment. I cried. I felt betrayed by her and then a heavy, deep empathy for him. I just hugged him and cried, and he cried too. I told him he really needs to tell his dad because we can no longer associate with her in any way. And how can we manage that when she lives with him?
Starting point is 01:20:19 At first he said no. He couldn't because he's worried they won't believe him and also doesn't want to ruin his dad's life because how could the marriage with his stepmom survive this? I told him I don't have an answer for that. He has to trust that his dad will believe him and I was also worried about her panicking after their argument and doing something crazy.
Starting point is 01:20:40 He agreed to tell his dad and said he wanted to do it alone. The following weekend, he met up with dad and told him everything. showed the text to him, et cetera. His dad believed him, and like me, was caught off guard and speechless. This led to him telling his wife and saying he was kicking Jess out. However, his wife did not believe it. She claims my husband must have edited the text somehow,
Starting point is 01:21:08 actual text in the message app that you can scroll through, and it's Jess's number attached to the contact. Jess freaked out, saying none of it was true, and he was the one who'd been harassing her. That's when my husband threatened to take it all to the police for an order of protection against her if she did not tell the truth. And she finally admitted to everything in an insane meltdown. His stepmom is horrified. His dad doesn't know if he can get past her, not believing in my husband and accusing him.
Starting point is 01:21:37 We are currently in this weird limbo phase of the whole family on edge. Jess is still living there. His dad has demanded she leave and has given her two weeks instead of kicking her out on the spot in an attempt to try and salvage the situation with his wife. My husband and I are having lots of talks, trying to regroup. We've put trying for a baby on hold as we seek therapy for this. He's still considering going to the police for the harassment. My heart is broken for him and also trying to come to terms with the truth.
Starting point is 01:22:13 That Jess, who I've known for years, would do something like this. I was prepared to uncover an affair, but never this. I'm not sure if there will be any more updates after this, maybe if my husband decides to pursue legal action. I want to say thanks to everybody who pushed for me to dig into my suspicions. Otherwise, this couldn't have gone any further. I don't like to think of what could have happened. I probably left things out, so if people have questions,
Starting point is 01:22:44 I'll try my best to reply in the comments. And now it's get into some of the top comments. One user says, oh, wow, that's so intense. How are you doing with all this? Way to be there for your husband. And also, I'm glad that the truth came out. And the OPEE responds and says, I'm really hurt and overwhelmed.
Starting point is 01:23:05 Her and I were close friends for so long, so I'm really battling how she portrayed him, but me too. And I also feel guilty for having this backthought of feelings lied by him. When I know this wasn't his fault, he was assaulted and essentially stalked by her. So I in no way blame him. Just trying to shake this feeling and hoping it fades. Someone else says, Hello, you should push your husband to go the legal route.
Starting point is 01:23:32 This is messed up. And the OP response and says, I told him that he should because she is unstable. It scares me because she seems so totally normal. Like this is the biggest shock of, of my life learning her true behavior. And someone like that is totally unpredictable. He knows he needs to, but is trying to mentally prepare.
Starting point is 01:23:55 And I'm trying to not push him too hard because this has been a lot. And someone else says, first of all, what she did is called R word. Not assault. Second, he needs to get a restraining order, ASAP. Third, he needs to pursue this legally. and hard because she is a danger to all men, period. And the O.P. responds and says, yeah, I know that's what it's called and what happened.
Starting point is 01:24:26 I myself was R in high school, and I don't like using the word. It's very triggering to me. He's still considering taking legal action, but I can't force him to. And we have never received another update from the OPE ever again because the OPE's account was shortly after banned, but man, that took a wild, wild turn. My girlfriend found her explicit photos on her stepdad's phone. To begin, I am 17 years old. My girlfriend is also 17. Recently, she got her phone taken away by her parents for about two weeks during that time.
Starting point is 01:25:10 I gave her one of my old phones so we could still communicate using Snapchat. We have exchanged explicit photos in the past, but not frequently. We both have each other's explicit photos saved on our Snapchat conversation. While her parents had her phone, her mom saw and mentioned to my girlfriend that she saw the explicit photos, but also mentioned that she quickly looked away and made sure stepdad did not see and put the phone in a family safe that only her parents know the code to. After she got her phone back within minutes, stepdad broke it while in an argument with her,
Starting point is 01:25:51 which he later apologized for and promised to replace it. About four days after the argument where her phone was broken, she got a new one, and proceeded in life normally. It's been about a week and a half since she got her new phone, and during that time, she never had a need to text her stepdad, and would instead call him most of the time if she needed to speak with him. Today he asked her to text him what she wanted to eat, and she realized when she scrolled up that explicit photos from her old phone
Starting point is 01:26:25 had been sent to her stepdad while it should have been in the safe. We checked the dates that it was sent, and that was during the time when the phone wasn't in her possession. There was explicit pictures and videos that would normally require a password to access. I should mention that since she logged into Snapchat on the used phone I gave her during the time her phone was taken, Snapchat logged out her of her actual phone because it can only be on one device at a time. She later realized that her stepdad has known the password. She used most of the time, including her Snapchat, and her email, meaning he could log into her Snapchat account. During the
Starting point is 01:27:08 time her phone was taken, she was randomly logged out from a used phone and couldn't log back in for a period of time and the time and date match to when the explicit photos were sent. Her mom does not know and is away for the next four days in a foreign country. She is currently there alone with her stepdad. What should we do? And now let's get into some of the top comments. One person says, she needs to tell her mom right away. She should screenshot everything and send it to you. Just in case he realizes he didn't delete the proof off her phone and tries to go do that. If she doesn't feel comfortable staying there with him, is there any way for her to stay with you or a friend?
Starting point is 01:27:53 Also, going to the police is an option. He is now in possession of illegal content involving minors. And that is illegal, at least where I live. And the OPE responds and says She can stay with me but she's pretending like she never saw anything Because she's afraid and her mom is in another country So she is vulnerable and her parents would never let her stay with me For reasons I do not know
Starting point is 01:28:19 Probably trying to be good parents Someone else says probably call the police Don't know what country you're in but in the US He has committed at least three crimes I can think of Possession of explicit photos without permission, possession of illegal content involving minors, and digital theft slash identity fraud for logging into another person's account for unlawful purposes. This would be a good question for R slash legal advice.
Starting point is 01:28:52 Another commenter says, get the evidence, tell the police, in that order. Evidence is so, so, so, so important. I was essayed by my stepdad twice as a teen, and nothing was done about it because I did not have the proper evidence. Once you have the proper evidence, get the police involved immediately. Right now, he possesses legal content, and it's clear he's infatuated with your girlfriend. She could potentially be in danger, but the police need to know why, and they need an alibi. You're a great boyfriend for wanting to get involved and help her. please do this.
Starting point is 01:29:31 And then we get an update from the OP about three days later. And let's get into it. This reads update. She told her mom before she got back from said foreign country, and her mom advised her to remain normal until she got back the next day. Her mom also made her stay at her grandma's house, and when she got back, she confronted her stepdad. Initially, the stepdad denied it over and over again.
Starting point is 01:29:58 again, but when her mom said she has proof, he admitted to doing it and gave silly excuses why, like saying, he wanted to protect my girlfriend. My girlfriend's mom proceeded to kick him out and told him to not come back. He, after hearing that, tried to do something with a screwdriver, but her mom threatened to call the police and he left. It's been two days since that happened, and he has continuously tried to guilt my girlfriend's mom and accused her of cheating so he doesn't look bad. Her mom is understandably devastated and completely confused. This was her significant other slash husband for over 10 years.
Starting point is 01:30:43 And she has since sought therapy for advice on how to proceed. They've ultimately decided not to press charges and agreed that they just want him out of their lives. And now let's get into some. of the top comments. One user says, how are you holding up? And the OP says, me specifically. And the commenter says, yes, I know it can't be easy for you to just let everything take its path without being able to help. How are you feeling? And the OP responds and says, thank you for saying that. I feel voiceless, I guess, especially in comparison to like everyone else, but to some degree,
Starting point is 01:31:23 I think it's maybe because it's not my problem. And I think her, family would not like me to help. They are very family first. So sometimes all I can do is spectate because in her family, I'm probably just a kid. But I try to help my girlfriend specifically, and when I do, it goes unrecognized. So I guess I selfishly kind of feel unappreciated or overlooked, especially because no one would see me as helpful because I'm not a part of the family. I would love to be more involved because I love her, but I guess I'm forced to keep my distance because again, I'm 17, and it's not my problem. It's hers and her family's problem. So yeah, I think that sums it up for me. I am happy that it's all working out. Thank you for asking.
Starting point is 01:32:11 And someone else says, I'm so happy this turned out the way it did. I feel incredibly bad for you and your girlfriend's mom, but she did the right thing. And she sounds like a strong. woman. I hope this guy doesn't keep bugging her trying to get back into their lives. As you age, people start to listen and take you seriously. It won't be long. You're 17. Good luck to you and your girlfriend with the future, O.P. And stay safe. And someone else says, I'm so glad the mom didn't question your girlfriend when she told her. I feel like these stories often end with the parent choosing the significant other over the child, and I'm glad that it didn't happen. And the OP responds and says, we did fear that, but thankfully, it worked out.
Starting point is 01:32:59 And we have never received another update from the OP, but God, so, so gross. And they were married for 10 years or together in each other's lives for 10 years. Like, that is so disgusting how the stepdad would be okay with watching and then sending those videos to his own phone and doing God knows what with them. That is so disgusting. and hopefully, I mean, I know that they didn't press charges, but I wish he went to jail for that. Obviously, it's illegal. I wish they pressed charges or something. It's insane how he just got off Scott Free, but yeah, that guy's a monster.
Starting point is 01:33:36 Am I the asshole for refusing to let my neighbor use my vintage bathtub for his therapy sessions? I 28 female live in an old Victorian house I inherited from my girlfriend. grandfather. One of the features of the house is the original clawfoot bathtub from the 1920s in the upstairs bathroom. I was originally going to look at having it removed, but kept putting it off and eventually fell in love with it. So I kept it. Enter my next door neighbor, Dennis, who's 50 male. Dennis is eccentric. He's into all these wards. He's into all these weird health trends like grounding his feet in buckets of dirt for electrical balance. Lately, he's gotten into hydrotherapy, which apparently requires him to soak in cold water
Starting point is 01:34:36 for extended periods of time to reset his nervous system. Two weeks ago, Dennis came over and, completely out of the blue, asked if he could use my bathtub for his hydrotherapy sessions. I thought he was joking. But no, he earnestly explained that my tub was the perfect energy conduit because it was pre-industrial revolution and untainted by modern manufacturing processes. I told him no, obviously. I don't want a rando, wrinkly old dude filling it with ice water and doing whatever nonsense he's into.
Starting point is 01:35:21 Dennis did not take this well. He said I was being selfish with community resources. That's just crazy. And that because I inherited the house rather than buying it, I had a duty to share since I didn't work for it. He started bringing it up every time he saw me, passive aggressively saying things like, must be nice to hoard that all by yourself.
Starting point is 01:35:48 then somehow this got out to the neighborhood Facebook group who loves drama and now half the street thinks I'm the villain for gatekeeping my own bathtub. This is crazy. This is crazy. There's no, oh my God, there's no way. The cherry on top is Dennis conveniently claims that his shower stopped working too so he doesn't even have a place to clean himself. not like this was a favorite pastime of his to begin with, respectively.
Starting point is 01:36:22 I was trying to just avoid Dennis as much as I could and ignore the few comments from my neighbors until I ran into one of my neighbors while I was going for a walk Saturday evening. I don't really know her, but we chatted briefly, and somehow the issue came up. I was expecting some sympathy for the absurdity of this, but this woman proceeds to,
Starting point is 01:36:47 tear into me, like literal verbal assault by the end of it asking me why I was being so stupid and selfish, that I have multiple bathrooms in the house and couldn't even spare it to help this old man's health. This morning I found literal gift-wrapped bar of soap in the mailbox. There was no note or anything, but I assume this was her insanely petty, passive, aggressive way of telling me to shove it. I do not want this man soaking in my tub. I do not care about his nervous system reset, but now I feel like I'm losing my mind because everyone around me is acting like I'm some kind of selfish monster.
Starting point is 01:37:29 I get that some of the people in the neighborhood aren't keen on me living here, but I live by myself and work and go to school all day. And I'm genuinely starting to worry that I'm going to come home one day to find Dennis reclining in my bathtub. Am I the asshole? Also, for anyone wondering how Dennis knew about the tub, he's lived here forever and helped my granddad do repairs back in the day,
Starting point is 01:37:58 so he's seen the house. That said, he hasn't been in it, the house, not the bathtub, to my knowledge, in at least 15 years. And now let's get into some of the top comments. One person says, obviously not the asshole. It's not a community resource. It's your home. Another commenter says, not the asshole.
Starting point is 01:38:21 Tell your neighbors that you will not allow a mentally ill man into your house to get unclothed in your bathtub. Your final answer is, hell no. And the next step will be a restraining order. Make sure they make the connection that there's a mentally ill man demanding to be unclothed in the house of a young woman. who lives alone. And do strange things in her favorite bathtub. Make sure they understand
Starting point is 01:38:47 how aggressively weird this makes them look. When he posts on Facebook, rely on Facebook. So it's on record. I have told you no, repeatedly, that will not allow you into my house to get unclothed.
Starting point is 01:39:01 You are not entitled to get inside my house and take your clothes off. No means no. Stop harassing me. Stop telling my neighbors to pressure me to let you to my house. I do not want a strange man in my home. Set up cameras because his next escalation will be breaking in. And I just find it so crazy how like people when they're told no,
Starting point is 01:39:26 they'll just keep asking, especially like more or less a stranger. It's like you have to be mentally ill to keep saying, hey, can I use your bathtub? Which is a crazy thing to ask for off the bat. But, like, again and again, like, you have to be deranged. Another commenter says, to begin with, you do not need a single man, let alone a creepy single man, in your house. You are a single woman who lives alone. From what you've seen, he's the type of guy who could go off at any minute. He covets your tub? What's to keep him from deciding it belongs to him?
Starting point is 01:40:08 As to your neighbor, suggest she let him use her bathtub if she's so concerned about his health. That's a good point. Even if his shower is broken, he has options. He could have a plumber come fix it. Or he could take a sponge bath in his sink. Not as nice as a shower, but it will get you clean. And I would file a complaint with the police to have on record just in case his behavior gets worse. calling in a mental wellness check on him and have them suggest he leaves you alone.
Starting point is 01:40:42 Oh, by the way, that tub is not pre-industrial revolution. There were two in America, 1810 through 1860 and 1870 through 1920. It is highly unlikely that your tub predates that. And someone else says, what an entitled man your neighbor is and those against you, are bat-shit crazy. And then the OP comes back with an update the next day, and let's get into it. It reads,
Starting point is 01:41:15 Thank you all for the support. I was overwhelmed with over 1,000 Reddit notifications this morning and literally cried from relief scrolling through all of your comments before I got out of bed. Some helpful details. To clarify the neighborhood situation, it's a very small,
Starting point is 01:41:33 older community that is fairly, isolated from the surrounding area. Everyone has all lived here forever, and everyone is very toxic and set in their ways. They are very politically hostile to outsiders, and though I am not a strong politics person, it became very clear when I moved in that I was not one of them. This combined with the jealousy of me inheriting the house at a relatively young age has painted me as an outsider in their minds. This is the first actual issue I've had,
Starting point is 01:42:08 but there have been mild microaggressions toward me in the past. Nothing serious, just little things to irk me that I have largely ignored. To the people saying I use M-Dashes too much, deal with it, L.O.L. I get a lot of flack from this from friends. I even use them when texting. Also, comments about the age of the tub sounds accurate.
Starting point is 01:42:32 I'm not a history buff, but this makes a lot of sense, L.O.L. And to anyone who was offended by me calling Dennis old, I'm sorry. He's probably late 50s, and while that is not super old, it's old enough compared to me to make me feel weird about inviting him into my home as practically a teenager. To anyone asking why I didn't take action earlier, I work 20 plus hours a week, and I'm a non-traditional full-time student commuted over an hour to class, several days a week, so I have not had the time or energy to look into a lot of things you guys suggested. As for moving forward, I don't have the mental and physical capacity to care for a dog in my life right now, especially a big one, and I don't feel comfortable inviting a housemate
Starting point is 01:43:20 into my home to live with me. That said, the cameras seem like a really great idea that I really should have considered when I moved in. I just didn't see the need before. I don't have have loads of money to spend on a full security system, but will be at least purchasing a camera for my front door. I am worried about confronting Dennis or escalating things in the Facebook group because I do not want things to get worse or encourage someone to do something stupid. For the time being, I will be actively avoiding him and my neighbors and seeing if anything else happens. I haven't dealt with the police in my town but have heard that they are not super helpful. So I hesitate to bring this to their attention. I feel like telling them that someone asked to use my bathtub and
Starting point is 01:44:07 someone gave me else a bar of soap is not going to be grounds for them to take me seriously. Something that has really worried me is the comments on the original post about Dennis's possible predatory behavior. While it was clear that he was gently harassing me about it, I never even considered the fact that being unclothed in my home or sharing the intimacy of my bathtub, maybe some sort of weird fantasy. This may be overreacting, but now that I think about it, all the signs check out the constant pressure. And like, seriously, why wouldn't he just buy his own tub? I feel naive and a major ick, and I'm genuinely scared about what he might do if he actually has ill intentions. Any further input is welcome. I'm still reading through all of your
Starting point is 01:45:00 lovely comments on the original post, and I will try to update you all if this escalates any further. And now let's get into some of the top comments. One user says, personally, I would go on the Facebook group and ask if it's considered normal in this community for older men to pressure young women to allow the men into their homes alone and undress. Ask how many of them are already allowing this man to use their homes or their granddaughter's homes as he wishes. Another commenter says post on the facebook group that dennis's harassment of you is reaching extremely unsafe levels and that you do not want to involve the police in his inappropriate demands to be unclothed in your home explicitly say that his behavior is predatory and you are horrified at the neighborhood
Starting point is 01:45:49 siding with what it appears to be harassment until you make a stand they will continue to harass you And the next time Dennis approaches you, loudly state, get away from me. You will never be unclothed in my home, and I will call the police if you keep harassing me. Be loud. So many predators get away with this because their victims stay quiet. Scream it from the rooftops. Whether his intent is intimate or not, does it not matter? It's wildly inappropriate. And someone else says, you're not overreacting at all. This is weird. Your gut feeling is spot on. The fact that he keeps pushing and won't just get his own tub is a huge red flag. Cameras are a smart move, and honestly, avoiding him sounds like the best call.
Starting point is 01:46:38 Trust yourself, and don't feel bad for setting boundaries. Not the asshole. And unfortunately, the OP has since deleted their profile, or the profile has been banned, and so we don't know what ended up happening, but just a very uncomfortable in such a weird scenario. I mean, it's so, so weird that everybody in the community was like, yeah, why aren't you letting him use your bathtub? Like, I feel like some of like the other older people would have, like, sympathized and been like, I have a granddaughter your age. Like, if that happened to my granddaughter, I would be creeped out. Like, I thought like at least some of the older people in the community would sympathize, but I guess not. They're just very weird and they want this old guy to use her bathtub really badly for some reason.
Starting point is 01:47:24 And what do you think? Do you think that guy is predatory or he's just completely oblivious to how weird it is? Because I don't know. I feel like old people sometimes just don't know that what they're doing is weird or creepy. Or maybe they do. I don't know. But yeah, what do you guys think about this one? I just feel bad for the OPE because they moved into this new neighborhood,
Starting point is 01:47:47 into a house that she inherited, and she has to deal with all these crappy neighbors. And so I hope she was able to, you know, adapt and, meet these neighbors and the neighbors were nicer to her and hopefully this creepy old guy left her alone for good who came into my house and started my dryer title says it all i do not have dryer timer problems and never had if anything my clothes always take two runs through the dryer to dry probably because i load it too heavy maybe this sounds silly or overly paranoid but i can't stop thinking about it. I loaded the dryer before I left for work at 5 a.m. I put it on a 90-minute cycle. When I got home from work at 4 p.m., the dryer still had approximately 70 minutes left.
Starting point is 01:48:41 Maybe this doesn't even belong in this thread, but it's definitely a mystery. I even do exactly the same thing with my dryer today to see if it happened again. It didn't. I got paranoid and thought maybe it's my ex. Last December, months after we broke up, I was on a night shift. He knew what time I left for work, and a handful of times I saw his car. It was kind of old and not terribly common. Parked right next to my exit gate for my apartment. Backed into the space so he could look out the windshield of the road. Sometimes it was empty. Sometimes there was a hooded man sitting inside. resembled my ex a lot. One time I was running late for work and went out a different exit gate.
Starting point is 01:49:29 As I was pulling out, my headlights caught the driver's seat while he was driving away. I'm assuming because it was well past my time for work and he didn't see my car, so left and I caught him just as he was leaving. Of course, there's room for doubt here, but it looked a lot like him. When we were dating, he kept talking about how he wanted to find a copy my access card to the gate. Something about RFID or something? He carried a key to my apartment door for the months we were together
Starting point is 01:49:58 and had plenty of time to copy it. The relationship ended poorly, and he was extremely obsessive, and borderline S-A'd me all the time. The classic case of continuing to try to convince me to have intimacy after I would say no several times. He would not stop touching me, begged for intimacy even after I clearly stated I wasn't in the mood,
Starting point is 01:50:25 literally 100% of the time, the most freaky MFer I've ever met. Like he seriously could not control himself, not even in his sleep. We haven't spoken in months, and the last time we spoke, I called him out on his behavior, not the first time.
Starting point is 01:50:42 He blocked me on everything except maybe my number. I don't know, I haven't tried to reach him. Oh, and I've had two times where I've had unfamiliar logins into my Instagram, but they were from the same area as me. And when I changed my password, I got another notification. Someone was trying to access my account. This was before we stopped talking altogether. I don't think it's him.
Starting point is 01:51:07 What other possibilities could y'all think of? Maintenance coming in, unannounced or unprovoked? They've done this before where they knocked on my door and gave me came barreling in for a fire inspection. I never got any notice about an upcoming inspection, and the fire inspectors didn't seem to care much that I ripped my fire alarm out of the ceiling. So clearly, my apartment doesn't have very clear boundaries either. Anyways, please someone give me a hypothesis that isn't my ex, or maybe even elaborate on my ex. I don't care. Just give me something. Thankfully, I am coincidentally
Starting point is 01:51:48 moving out tomorrow. And now let's get into some of the top comments. One user says, does the dryer come on automatically after a power failure? Because a down power line that takes all day to fix would cause that.
Starting point is 01:52:04 Someone else says, not pertaining to your current issue, but you might want to have your vent line cleaned that would help with the drying times. I mean, unless you're drying wool blankets or 10 pairs of jeans, it shouldn't take 100. 80 minutes to dry. Someone else says, does your dryer automatically start another dry cycle if the clothes
Starting point is 01:52:24 haven't fully dried yet? My dryer does this and sometimes the sensor has a hard time and will start to new dry cycle like hours after the initial. Anyway, do you have a door camera? And someone else says, it definitely sounds like a malfunctioning timer on your dryer. That's the most likely explanation by far. For the sake of discussion, let's imagine that it was an intruder playing with your dryer. Assuming your driver was functioning correctly, they would need to have entered your home within 90 minutes of your departure in order to be aware that the dryer was running. Then they would have spent hours there, hanging out basically all day, before turning on your dryer for some reason 20 minutes before you walked in the door.
Starting point is 01:53:15 If I was a creep, hanging out in your apartment, messing with the dryer would be my last priority. I wouldn't care about it at all. And even worse, if I knew you'd be home soon, I wouldn't want the noise coverage because it would keep me from hearing you opening the front door. Did you find anything else out of place when you got home? Because if somebody was there for hours, there would have been other stuff going on. So then your timeline would look like 5 a.m. You turn on the dryer and walk out the door.
Starting point is 01:53:47 Intruder notices that you're gone and enters sometime between 5 and 6.30. Then the intruder hangs out, doing nothing substantial until 3.40, at which point he turns on the dryer and then leaves sometime between 340 and 359. Just missing you? Because in this timeline, we're assuming that nothing is wrong with the dryer. Meaning that with 70 minutes remaining on a max timer of 90 minutes, the intruder left just before you arrived. So basically, the intruder theory doesn't make a whole lot of sense.
Starting point is 01:54:22 It sounds like your ex was a creep, but I don't think he's breaking into your place just to fiddle with your dryer. And then the OP comes back 12 days later with an update and let's get into it. It reads, ran into my neighbor last week while I was picking up the last of my things and cleaning up the apartment before turning in my keys,
Starting point is 01:54:44 which I have yet to do. There is some overlap on my leases between old and new apartment. Haven't really talked to her much other than her kids, petting my dog, when I walk her, and friendly, hellos, but I got the gut anyways
Starting point is 01:54:58 to ask if she had seen anything. She had a door camera so I thought maybe she would have footage or something since the camera directly faces my door. She said the camera stopped working months prior and never got around to fixing it, though she did notice a man walking my dog one day.
Starting point is 01:55:18 She could have remembered which day it was, but definitely took notice of it because when I first moved in, I told her my dog was aggressive towards other dogs. She's not allowed around any dogs ever and just gave her the heads up since she has a Yorkie and if anything ever happens to be walking our dogs at the same time, just to have them leashed and stuff.
Starting point is 01:55:39 So she knew this and said she remembered the man because when he was walking her, leashed, he let her greet a neighbor's bulldog that was off leash. Normally, I'd pretty much run away if I saw a dog unleashed nearby when walking mine. So there we have it. Someone has been effing around in my apartment and walking my dog.
Starting point is 01:56:01 and just generally being a creep. She couldn't remember what he looked like, but I have a pretty good guess. And to all those who said I must clearly have a mental disorder to be paranoid about someone coming into my house, the OPEC then gives a middle finger. And now let's get into some of the top comments. One user says,
Starting point is 01:56:21 a lot of people here are suggesting getting a protection order, but protection orders don't get granted on a hunch. He may be granted temporary relief, but eventually a hearing would be held if the person you file against contests it. And if you don't have legitimate proof that you have substantial reason to fear for your safety, it's not going to be granted. You can't just walk into a court and file a request to take away someone's personal freedoms. If whoever OP suspects is the perpetrator, they absolutely need to get more evidence.
Starting point is 01:56:55 File police reports, request more patrols around their residents, get cameras. I've worked in the court system for over six years, three of those doing crime victim work, a lot of which was helping crime victims find relief through petitioning for protection orders. And so I guess it turns out that it was the stalker or like the O.P.'s ex-boyfriend the whole time, who is a stalker. I mean, that is horrifying that he was going into her house and doing God knows what in there. and for whatever reason started the dryer once. But this could have ended so much worse. Like seriously, like this guy was in her house.
Starting point is 01:57:37 He could have waited there until she got home, was completely defenseless, and attacked her or killed her. Or done, who knows what. This guy's obviously unwell to be going into her house when she's gone. Like, that is a crazy person. And also, like, taking her dog out for a walk,
Starting point is 01:57:55 like that is so, strange. And so hopefully the OPE was able to move and then left alone because we have never heard from the O.P. again. And so I hope and pray that the O.P. is all right. Because that guy is a psychopath. And all right, guys, that wraps up two hours of some unhinged true Reddit threads. I really hope you enjoyed today's video. If you did, make sure to like the video and subscribe to the channel. I appreciate all of the supports. You guys have been showing me just unreal support lately. I appreciate all of the kind words. You guys are really just too nice for me. So I just want to say thank you all so much for the support. Thank you guys so much
Starting point is 01:58:38 for watching. Thank you guys for following my Instagram and going over to my Spotify and following me over there. And I just truly can't believe that we're in the top 100 podcast on Spotify. Like how is that even possible? And like in the top 15 true crime podcast as well. So that's just unbelievable. I just want to say thank you guys so so much and also what did you think about today's video i had my face in it for like the majority of it would you like to see more of me reading it or would you like me to go back to just like the text on screen the entire time if so just comment down below but i thought this was kind of a cool change i think this kind of makes it more personable i don't know i just feel like this you know is a better change than just the text on screen you know i feel like that's so boring but
Starting point is 01:59:23 you being able to see me read this and all that sort of stuff my reactions i feel like it adds a lot to the content so please comment down below your thoughts i read every single comment and so yeah i appreciate you guys um watching and supporting it really does mean the world and also if you like to get early access to every single video i release go head over to my patreon and you can get early access to every single video i release for just five dollars a month and uh i would love to see you over there and like said, follow my Instagram and follow me over on Spotify and rate me five stars. And if you enjoyed today's video, you can check out some other videos on the channel. I'm sure you'll find something else that you might like. And once again, thank you guys so much for watching from the bottom
Starting point is 02:00:09 of my heart. It truly does mean the world. And this was Snook and I'll see you next time. Bye.

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