Snook - Deranged Reddit Threads

Episode Date: June 29, 2026

From a OP asking for help regarding his crazy gf who confessed to beating up homeless people... to a disturbing thread of gross infidelity... these are some Deranged Reddit Threads... I hope every OP in this video is doing better now. Would you like to see me make similar videos in the future? Leave your thoughts down below in the comment section, and make sure to like and subscribe! Please do not attempt to contact anyone talked about in this video. Timestamps: 0:00 | Intro0:46 | Am I overreacting to my girlfriend's experience of hurting homeless people in the past?12:26 | My best friend might be in love with my husband. Where do I go from here?45:27 | I hired an investigator and have discovered my husband's affair and "intimacy addiction"1:07:45 | AITAH for writing a letter to the judge in my brothers case asking her not to give him the minimum mandatory sentence?1:24:07 | I opened my husband's snapchat and it was a explicit picture and caption from a girl1:41:52 | My girlfriend had a meltdown and fell asleep on my couch2:01:02 | Outro Join the Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/SnookYT⁠ ⁠Follow me on instagram and Spotify! If your story or post was included in today's video and you wish for it to be taken down, please reach out to this email. [e-mail] And yes, I'm a human voice. NEXT SUB GOAL - 100,000 subscribers! So make sure to subscribe! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey what's up guys and welcome back to the channel and today we're getting into some deranged Reddit threads and oh boy are today's Reddit threads insane unhinged and just downright disturbing. These are truly some of the most, you know, tragic and horrific Reddit threads I have ever read. So you're going to want to make sure to stick around and I appreciate you stop by means of world and make sure you like the video and subscribe to the channel. The channel subscriber goals 1 million subscribers before the end of the year, so please subscribe and all right. This video will be long enough already, so sit back, relax, grab a drink, or grab a snack, and without further ado, let's get into some deranged Reddit threads.

Am I overreacting to my girlfriend's experience of assaulting homeless people in the past? Originally posted to R-slash, Am I overreacting in the post reads as follows. So I've been dating my girlfriend for like nine months. She just recently turned 26 and we were celebrating her birthday. At the end of the night, we are both kind of drunk and we're talking about our craziest stories from college. She said that her boyfriend at the time in a friend group of guys and girls would sometimes go out at night and mess with homeless dudes, including beating them up with bats. She also referred to them as junkies and generally dehumanizing terms about them. And she even mentioned that it was a great stress relief.

She can get pretty crazy sometimes and has a bit of a mean streak, honestly. But it really shocked me when she said this. I thought she was joking because she was laughing while telling the story. But as I acted skeptical, she kept affirming it was true. I just played along and kind of laughed, thinking she was just drunk. The next day, it still bothered me subconsciously, so I asked her again about it casually,

and she said, yeah, it was true. The thing that disturbed me, though, was there was no remorse. She told a story like, LOL, good times kind of story. I think if she was embarrassed about it, I would have felt a little bit different. I still tried to ignore it over the next few days, but I obviously wasn't able to because I ended up researching online

for information about similar crimes in that city at the time. I didn't find anything, by the way. Unfortunately, I definitely believe her at this point, though. She never does these kind of elaborate jokes over the days. Plus, I can just tell she's being truthful just knowing her. Anyways, like I said, it continued to bother me, so I brought it up one more time a couple of days later. This time, I was more serious, basically just straight of asking how she could not feel bad about that.

I was honestly just curious. She got kind of pissed this time. She asked me if it turns me on, and that's why I keep bothering her about it? I said, no, but I just couldn't imagine doing something like that to myself, so that's why I'm asking. Then she started saying stuff like, Why are you judging me about stuff that happened years ago? And saying it's none of my business who she slept with back then or anything else about her life.

That's when it occurred to me that she might have thought I was jealous or something about her ex since he was apparently one of the guys in that group. She might think I'm trying to guilt-trip her out of jealousy related to him or something, which I'm not. But anyways, that was how it ended, and I'm obviously not going to bring it up again. Even though I honestly considered breaking up over this,

I kind of saw where she was coming from and that it was a long time ago and maybe I'm being kind of a douche for judging her over this. What do you think? I'm no saint at all, but I can't help that it bothers me. I can't look at her the same way now and I really think it might be over.

Thank you for the advice. And now let's get into some of the top comments. Someone says no, but why wasn't this a deal breaker for you? And the OP says, I think it is. I'm just saying I'm second guessing it. It's hard to process. Another user says, why the F are you with an evil person like that, damn bro? You are a POS also. And the OPE replies and says, sorry, I'm not trying to justify it. It's just really hard for me. But people do change. I was a totally different person in college too. This would be so much easier for me if she was just sorry about it.

And someone replies and says, But she's not sorry. She's mad, you keep bringing it up, and is acting like the dude she did those horrific things with is the problem. And not the assault and battery on an innocent person. This shouldn't be hard, dude. And another user says, She is a psychopath.

She admits to violently attacking people. You aren't married. You can leave. Knowing she is capable of this, you are underreacting by staying with her. One day, she could easily do something like that to you. So take precautions when you leave. And someone replies and says,

not only admitting it, but laughing as she's retelling it. Zero remorse. I guess the homeless aren't actual people to her, which is indicative of a whole host of other underlying issues with her. The whole part where she asks if it turns them on? Gross. She's 26, and this happened in college. It's not even that long ago, really.

The entire conversation would be a total relationship deal breaker for me. I'd never be able to look at her the same way if it was me. I'm surprised it's even a question. And someone replies and says, Vulnerable people, no less. As part of a group with weapons, for no other reason than she could.

And she thinks O.P. is asking about it because it turns him on? Definitely a psychopath. And someone else replies and says, targeted specifically because they were vulnerable members of the population. That's the same reason most serial killer targets the homeless and intimate workers because it's easy to get away with. In other words, the criteria justifying the senseless acts of violence for the girlfriend is simply that she slash they can. As far as you know, whenever she's not committing horrible,

unspeakable acts, it may only be because she doesn't want to suffer negative consequences for her actions. It's not basic kindness. It's certainly not. not compassion. F this person. I would be instantly, irreparably, permanently, overwhelmingly disgusted by the very sight of her. I sure as hell wouldn't trust her. Not even the most basic level of trust. Like feeling secure in knowing they aren't going to kill you in your sleep. Hell, I got turned off with a girl I was talking to because she told me that she and her friends would always make fun of fat girls on the dance floor when they would go to clubs. And that's nothing compared to beating homeless people with bats.

I want to be clear on this. If the only thing holding her back from vicious, violent assault is lack of opportunity, she's basically a psychopath. And yeah, asking if it turns him on is super weird to me too. Like if he had a different reaction and was in. interested in doing it, she'd not only be back at senseless acts of violence, but would be deriving pleasure from it, which is literally what serial killers do. And I completely agree with everyone in the comments.

Like, why is the O.P. still staying with her? Like, why is he even considering it? Like, if I was him, I would go to the police and say, hey, a few years ago was homeless people like randomly getting beat with bats? I have your suspect. Like that is just beyond effed up. Like this girlfriend like has zero remorse for it. And she literally went out in the night with a group of people and beat homeless people with bats.

That like doesn't even sound real. That is literally just psychopathic shit. That is just crazy. Like I can't even believe that. And the O.P is like, I'm consider. if I'm even going to leave her. Like, what is there to consider? Your girlfriend's a psychopath.

He should be considering whether or not to report it to the police, even though he definitely should. But my God, this is just the wildest thread I have ever read. And a week later, the O.P. comes back with an update. And let's get into it. I just wanted to let everyone know that I broke up with my girlfriend.

I absolutely do not condone any violence against on how to... people. That's the reason I asked about it because it seriously shocked me. But then everyone turned it on me and acted like I was condoning it. I'm sorry, but it just takes a lot of time to process when you're in a relationship with someone. You can't just end it like that. Plus, you know, I try to be really mindful of things like shaming women for past mistakes and relationships. The last thing I want to be is one of those guys. And when she accused me of that herself, I started believing I may be wrong. But anyway, when I told her we were going to have

a breakup because of what she told me, she actually looked shocked. I think she believed I was joking at first. But I straight up told her how wrong she was for doing that, which I hadn't had the courage to do before. I said how she could have even killed one of those guys and not known it, etc. She didn't have much to say. just looking really angry honestly. But anyway, once I showed out serious, she started guilt-tripping me about how I'm trying to shame her for her past, etc. The same point she had made before.

But in the end, she started insulting me really harshly and eventually turned it around on me and it was like she was breaking up with me instead. However, she wants to think of it, as fine with me. Some of the things she said were really hurtful, if I'm being honest, but I know she was angry, and I just have to keep reminding myself that I did the right thing.

As for reporting the crimes, like some people had said, I did try, but I had trouble talking to a person at the police department over the phone. It's across the country from where I am. The phone recording tells me to file reports online. The online form asked me if I know who did the crime, and when I check yes, it tells me I have to file the report on the phone or in person. Anyway, I'm still working on that, but it seems like there's a lot of bureaucracy to do through. Sorry for not responding to a lot of you before, but I was really overwhelmed. Even though this isn't my main account, I want people to know I did the right thing.

Take care. My 26 female best friend who's 23 female might be in love with my husband, who's 26 male. Where do I go from here? And trust me, this one gets wild. Let's get into it. Throw away because my husband stalks Reddit. Also, I know he isn't cheating on me. He's at home more often than not.

And I have full access to his electronics, as does he to my phone. mine. Note, some identifying details have been changed to protect my privacy, such as names. My husband and I have been together since we are young teenagers. We got married last year and have a six-month-old daughter together. She is the light of both our lives as we both came from broken homes and want a better life than we lived growing up. My best friend came a few years later. We used to live in the same neighborhood and casually began to hang out. She lives with both her parents and siblings as she is studying to get her bachelor's degree. At first, she didn't like my husband.

Said that he was clingy and tried to insert himself into our friendship. WTF. She was civil to him because he was my romantic partner. For context, my husband is bipolar type 2. autism and PTSD, and it causes him to be a little socially awkward and miss certain social cues and taboos. I love him regardless of it all. Over the past few years, we have been hanging out a lot more. She comes over for a few drinks.

We go to the movies and even visit local attractions together. We all three have a good time. And my husband does try to make nights for just the two of us often too. However, last year, my husband and I found out we were expecting a child together in January. I was working and fell ill because of the time I was working at a fast food place. I threw up and went to the doctor. Come to find out, I was eight and a half weeks pregnant. My life changed and I had become more busy to get myself ready for motherhood.

My best friend saw me less and less, and we could. couldn't talk as much. My husband and I got married almost a month and a half after discovering we were going to become parents. That's when our dynamic changed. Recently, I applied to school and I'm currently in college trying to get a law degree so I can become a paralegal and get to law school. I'm also a stay-at-home mom while doing college too. I've been super busy. One day, my husband gets a text, and it's from my best friend. She asked if they can talk, as she was upset. He took the phone call with me protesting,

and a few minutes later said, Sandra, we need to go get Carla. Her father is picking a fight with her. I get upset as we were watching a movie together, and I had just gotten the baby down for bed. We go to her house, which is about 20 minutes away, and she stays with us for a night.

As I get our daughter back down to bed, Carla asked to cuddle with the two of us in our bed. I was hesitant. I have issues with colostrophobia due to a traumatic experience as a child. My husband gave the go-ahead. We settled in for the night. Carla's dad apologized and she heads back home.

Once she was gone, I blew up at my husband. What he did was not only inappropriate, but was disrespectful to my boundaries. Ever since, when she has an issue with her dad, she calls my husband and vents. One day, while my in-laws were staying with us, my mother-in-law overheard a conversation with my hubby and Carla.

She was concerned and asked me if I was okay with it. I said, no, not really, but every time I bring it up, he gets defensive, saying that she needs help, that she is going through a hard time, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It is important to note that my mother-in-law was cheated on in the past by her ex, my husband's father. We are also extremely close, and she sees me as a daughter. She hates cheaters with a passion, and my husband, who I will refer to as a daughter, James was using the same excuses his father did. She asked to speak to him privately and walked to our living room.

They got into a heated match and James apologized to me. He said he didn't know that I was hurting me and causing issues in our marriage. I asked him, how would you feel if I had asked him if another man could sleep in the bed with us? He kind of deflated and tried to say, it's different, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. His stepfather, Mark, fake name, spoke up and said, It is the same. You're uncomfortable with it, so is she. Quit with the excuses.

James respects Mark quite a lot, actually. Mark raised him since he was eight, and his own father was in and out of the picture. Once the dust settles, my husband truly apologized to me for his actions and said that he would do better. I kissed him, and that was that. However, I wouldn't be right here if that was the end of the issues.

Lately, Carla has been calling him three to eight times a day. She says it's because she is bored and has no one else to talk to. I snap. I call him out over the nonchalance about the situation, how when she calls, he answers, how it is making me feel like a third wheel in our marriage, etc. his response? She's just lonely. You're letting to get to you. That night I slept in the living room. I'm starting to suspect that she is trying to monopolize his time. She calls him for over a

hour each time he calls. They talk. She complains about her life, etc. Almost like she is his girlfriend or something. I'm starting to find this relationship troubling. It's getting to the point that it is affecting my marriage. Where do I go from here? Any advice would be appreciated. Edit. Thanks everyone for the feedback. I'm going to have a talk with him, with his mom involved. He won't listen to me if I don't. I'm tired of fighting him over this. I should have an update with a resolution in a couple of days. I'm going to read everyone's responses more thoroughly. Thanks for the advice. Edit number two, my husband and I have a had a sit-down talk. His mother and stepfather weren't available. He promised me that he would

explain everything in detail. I called Carla, and she said that we could talk Friday when she wasn't busy with school. She had something she needed to air out. I will have an update on Friday, hopefully. Edit number three, I woke up to a text from Carla this morning. She actually wants to talk to me tonight. alone. As her schedule has changed, we are going to have a heart to heart. Hopefully, I will have some news. Edit number four, I need some time. I will post an update later on. My heart is hurting. Husband and I are getting a divorce. Thank you for understanding. And then the O.P adds some additional comments in the comment section and says,

I quit my job after I found out I was pregnant. I became a stay-at-home mom. Believe it or not, people can have inheritance and have no bearing on job status. My soon-to-be ex-husband is a construction worker who makes good money. I only worked for my own satisfaction at being able to pay for stuff. His uncle was a financially sound man who had no children. That's why my ex got the house. We were looking at getting our own house soon before he died.

And then let's get into some other comments. Someone says, you've set your boundaries and he continues to cross them. Is this how you want your marriage to be? She won't stop as long as her husband responds to her every time. And the OP responds and says, You're right. I have issues standing up for myself. Another user says,

does he not understand how badly that reflects on him? that he is unwilling to explain his actions to his own wife, seeing the pain and distress you are in regarding the situation, or does he simply not care because he has feelings for her? In my opinion, if there was no cheating involved, he could have reassured you about that, but explained what was going on with Carla was a personal matter that she needs to share with you herself.

And the Opie responds and says, sometimes he thinks I'm too emotional. I have PTSD and BPD, and he doesn't understand my disorder. He doesn't understand that I feel things intensely, or passionately, or that it is super easy to hurt my feelings. He never even tries to understand me, autism or not. Honestly, I'm considering cutting my losses and going through divorce anyway. It's not worth the emotional anguish he puts.

put me through each and every day. And then we get another update two days later, which reads as follows. This update is hard. Everything about this situation sucks, and I don't know if I'll be okay for some time. Baby and I are currently staying with my friend, Tanya. To start, James and I are getting a divorce. Carla is no longer a friend to me. or our mutuals.

The betrayal is too deep for her to be friends with our group. As most of you assumed, James and Carla are indeed having an affair. It started about three months ago and just turned physical one month ago. They were planning on just up and leaving after James served me divorce papers. They used that ruse that he was helping her

through emotional issues to hide the fact. I was crushed. She wanted to clear the air before it got worse. That was when she dropped a huge bombshell. James was going to try and get me to terminate my rights to my child in order for Carla to adopt her. The reason? My borderline diagnosis a few years ago made me unfit to be a mother

and he was sure that the courts would agree. She then handed me two separate stacks of paperwork and left. I am contacting a lawyer as I'm writing this. I was seriously hurt. You guys were right. Carla was a snake and only told me this so she wouldn't feel guilty. However, I'm not letting my soon-to-be ex-husband bully me into termination of my rights. I called them afterwards and got very heated about what was going on.

James just sat there in silence. I was crying afterwards. I pleaded with him to tell me what I did wrong. For a little bit of backstory, I had a near fatal complication with my delivery of our daughter, where I bled my entire labor. I had to have two blood transfusions and haven't fully recovered from it. I was not cleared for any extraneous activity for three months, including intimacy. James was getting unsatisfied with all of my doctors' appointments,

and not getting the intimacy that he wanted. I was hurting and ended up needing another procedure to remove some placenta that didn't naturally come out. I had to have my tubes tied because if I had another child, it'll kill me next time. James wanted at least two more kids and this put an end to his plans. I married a monster. We were together since we were 15 and this is how he repays me?

I thought I knew him. He was acting so caring and nice to me. I am absolutely heartbroken. I'm not even sure if I'm going to update this anymore. But if I do, it'll be after the divorce settles. Thank you all for your concern. I'm going to take a step back and take some time to adjust. There is no chance for a healthy co-parenting situation.

I'm fighting for primary custody with supervised visits. Carla will not have access to my baby, as I will ask the judge to make a clause preventing her from interacting with my daughter. Thanks for all the advice. Edit, I forgot to add that I contacted his mother and Mark this morning. They are furious that James is doing this to me. They are helping me foot the cost of a lawyer because I'm a stamp. home mom and college student. They have kicked James out and he is staying at our old house with

Carla. He did give me the courtesy to get my stuff and didn't put up a fuss about me taking what I wanted. He told me that he will keep in contact for divorce proceedings. And now let's get into some of the top comments. Someone says, why did you leave? He's the asshole. He's the one that gets to leave. And the OPE he responds and says, it's his house, inheritance. He only let me stay as a courtesy. His parents didn't know the full story, but now that they do, he overstayed his welcome. They are so angry. I'm not sure if his relationship with his mom or stepdad are salvageable. And someone else says, what stands out is he's threatening to use her bipolar status against her despite being a parent with bipolar type 2, autism, and PTSD.

Elmayo, dude is evil and inept. And the O.P replies and says, I didn't say he was smart, did I? But with me having no financial way to support my child or a stable home, he has slightly better odds. I'm still in contact with his mom and stepfather. I'm hoping they will give me a place at their house for the time being. I feel like I am being intrusive at Tanya's home.

And then we get an update about a month later, and let's get into it. Update number two. Sorry I've been radio silent. I spoke to a lawyer who is helping me at a reduced rate. My in-laws are helping me foot the cost of a lawyer against their wayward son. With all the info that I have, including some threatening text from Carla and James, I have decided to file for a protection order. They were stupid enough to send me a text that pretty much confirmed the blackmail.

I intend to use this to my advantage in the upcoming divorce proceedings as evidence of emotional abuse. John has continued to maintain that I need to terminate my rights to her daughter so that he can run away with Carla. but I shut that down. My girl is the light of my life and my only chance to be a mom, which is something I have always wanted to do. I finally got a clean bill of health for my doctor after months of dealing with post-natal complications, and needless to say, no more babies for me. I could die if I get pregnant again.

I go to court Friday for our divorce proceedings. We have a mediator. that my lawyer is speaking to directly for me, so I don't have to deal with James' bully tactics. My lawyer is a no-nonsense kind of man, and I like that about him. My in-laws have decided to cut ties with James after this. He openly disrespected them for giving me a place to stay

after I was kicked from the house and the threats. The emotional anguish he has been putting me through has been too much. They've always saw me as their own daughter, and has treated me as such. They are just as angry at James for his involvement in all of this as I am. That's why they decided to foot the cost of a lawyer since I was a stay-at-home mom. My therapist has upped my therapy sessions to three times a week. I was also formally diagnosed with DID recently,

which only came out when I blacked out in a therapy session. My therapist and psychiatrist have been conceded. communicating and have suspected for a while that I have it, but got confirmed after my recent development and therapy. I haven't told James this and never intend to. My mother-in-law does know and has been my rock through all of this. As for the commenters on RA, that say that I moved on too quickly out of the house for it to seem real, I have one thing to say. I have very little and had to go back and grab the baby stuff. My soon-to-be ex-husband and Carla have went on a weekend getaway to my dream location,

which I knew they did to me to hurt me even more. The pictures were sent to me by my current friend who gave me a place to stay for a few days while my in-laws gave me a place in their home. Baby girl is adjusting to life without her daddy around all the time. She is super fussy most of the time and I'm sure she misses having them around It breaks my heart to pieces That's all that I have for you right now

I will have another update on Friday And one of the top comments says It's disgusting how determined they are to hurt you At this point It feels like it's something they bond over Which makes me think that once you get over all this And they realize they won't be able to hurt you you anymore, their relationship will wither away. Anyways, sending love, encourage your way.

And someone else says, whatever you plan to use against your husband in court, don't post all your plans here in the event your POS husband and mistress finds this post. Have you considered suing Carla for alienation? And then we get another update a week later titled Update Number 4, court went better than expected. I have some great news. Baby girl is safe with me. My lawyer pulled through for me, and my ex wants this divorce to be over with as soon as possible.

First of all, I got full custody of my daughter with supervised visitation from X. His own words came back to haunt him. I had proof of all of his threats in the blackmail of him trying to get me to sign away my rights, and the judge wasn't. happy. He torn to James and Carla about their behavior and how they tried to blackmail me, and how they were lucky that I didn't press charges for extortion. Because of their bad behavior,

he told them that he couldn't in conscience do shared custody because of the evidence of their behavior towards me. He was also worried that they would try to run off with her. Next up, because of all the behavior and aggression towards me that was unwarranted, my protection, order was granted. My mother-in-law, who stayed beside me in court, is the one who volunteered to facilitate the supervised visits until my divorce becomes final. If Carla and James try to contact me again, unless it is strictly about our daughter, then they both go to jail. James has to pay me child support. Of course, he tried to protest it, but it wasn't happening. Lastly, after court James said something that kind of broke my heart about our daughter.

If he can't have primary custody, then he is going to petition to terminate his rights. He doesn't want to be tied to me anymore and is willing to let my daughter suffer for it. So my daughter just pretty much loses her father because he would rather break away from me and pretend that I don't exist. I have some additional information from Carla

that she said to me afterwards. Apparently, she is infertile due to an illness she suffered from as a teenager. She wanted a baby so bad and to get me out of the picture so that they could play happy family with my daughter. I was stunned. She then asked me if I was happy

for tearing their family apart. I had to look at her for a second. She tore my family apart. I wanted to slap her so badly. because of her, my daughter is probably going to lose her father. I'm sad. That's all I have for you guys. My next update will probably when the divorce finally happens.

Thank you for reading this. And then the OP post an update about a week later, and let's get into it. This update is heavy. Court was on Friday, and I was waiting for the dust to settle before I posted two days ago. My soon-to-be ex-husband has been hospitalized. Carla called me this morning, crying despite the order. James tried to commit S-word this morning,

and she found him just in time. He tried to OD on his prescriptions, and now he is in the hospital. The doctors don't know how long he'll be there, but I will keep my hopes up for a speedy recovery. Despite the literal hell he has put me through, he is still the father of my daughter. I'm not pressing charges this time against Carla

because it was a dire emergency. James is stable and they are transferring him to another facility for the foreseeable future. I feel almost sorry for her. I don't know when I will be able to update again. I have a lot to deal with and emergency care to plan for. Please keep me in your thoughts as I navigate this difficult situation. Thank you.

And one of the top comments is, why did he commit S word? And the OOP responds and says, Bad manic episode. My husband is bipolar, and I guess everything got to him too much and he spiraled. Hard. He is alive, but hospitalized. And then the OPE comes back with an update about three weeks later, titled,

Carla has been arrested. I didn't think I'd be back with an update, but it has been two weeks since soon-to-be ex-husband was hospitalized for a S-word attempt. Since we have put divorce proceedings on hold for a while, until he gets out of the hospital, I've been taking the steps to spend time with my daughter and my in-laws, who have been my rocks in this situation. Life has stabilized for me a bit.

I'm still acclimating to my DID diagnosis. I've been out of it for a few days now, due to some heavy-duty painkillers. But I know some of you are here to see how this saga ends. On to the biggest part of the other. update. Carla has been arrested and is being charged with breaking a protective order, aggravated assault, and attempted kidnapping, plus a whole slew of other charges. Here is what happened.

I was out and about in town yesterday, trying to get a few errands done. I was starting to get hungry and decided to get some food at my favorite spot. It was a small Italian restaurant that I used to go to with my husband before the divorce proceeding started. I ordered my food and sat down to wait for my order. As my food was being handed to me, I saw Carla storm in like she owned the place and decided to confront me.

She was hysterical, and I couldn't make sense of what she was trying to say. She then started to punch and kick her. me. To make a long story short, Carla broke my nose and my arm, fractured my left eye socket, and punctured a lung. When she realized what she had done, she panicked and tried to take my stroller

while I was fighting to stay conscious. Someone saw what she was trying to do and stopped her before she could escape. I woke up to the police in my room and my in-laws holding my daughter. The police filled me in on what happened, and now Carla is in jail, awaiting a court hearing.

Because of the nature of my injuries, police are taking the decision to press charges out of my hands. Not that I tried to drop the charges anyway. So yeah, this is where I am at. Sorry if it seems super lame. I will update again, after Carla's court date in a few days. Much love, guys.

And the top comments on this post read as follows. Someone says, This is insane. I'm so sorry you're going through all of this and that she got to hurt you in this way. But I'm so, so happy, your baby girl is safe and that now you can likely be free from her.

I hope she goes to jail and never bothers you again. Please take the time to hear. both physically and emotionally from all of this. Love on your daughter and on your in-laws who thankfully see what's right and are on your side. And then the O.P. comes back five days later with another update titled, Carla was denied Bond. Carla is still sitting in jail. She is facing some serious prison time and I'm so happy that I can put her behind me.

I also got out of the hospital a few days ago. First of all, let me begin with a small update on soon-to-be ex-husband. He has been receptive to treatment and will be leaving the hospital next Monday. My mother-in-law has been keeping me up to date on his condition and he is stable now. A lot of you were right. Carlo took advantage of her manic episode and need for a stronger dosage of his medicine by convincing him to sleep with her. He has since broken up with her and begged his mother to tell me that he does want another chance to be my husband.

That's why she attacked me the other day. She couldn't handle his rejection. To be clear, I'm not giving him another chance. He destroyed my trust by not only cheating on me, but by refusing his medicines for a while and threatening me and my daughter. I'm still going through the divorce, but I may go to counseling to review the custody arrangement and give him more supervised visitation. He's still her father, after all. Also, I got a job recently.

I was told I got the position the day before I was released from the hospital. I haven't read all of your messages of support, but the ones that I have read, thank you. Carla is still in jail with no chance to get out before the next hearing. Hopefully, she gets what is coming to her. Hubby is stabilizing and begging for another chance. and I am looking forward to starting my career. I will be updating again in about a week.

Edit. I just read the comments and some of them are rather harsh about me saying I want to try and give him a little more supervised visits. Say what you want, but soon to be X can go back and try to get the custody order reviewed when he gets out. As long as he is stable and undergoes mandated therapy. The judges will rule in his favor. The review of his custody arrangement is per my lawyer's advice. Otherwise, when he gets better, he can file to have it amended. It's just easier to be agreeable rather than fighting it out.

I have no more energy to do so. Carla is still in jail, so my biggest threat is gone. She isn't getting out for some time. Not even her family's influence can help her. I'd rather agree to longer visits than risk. having him gain even an ounce of unsupervised custody. At least this way, I know my in-laws will get a route of there if he is still dangerous. It'll also look better on me during this divorce process.

And then the OP comes back with one final update, and let's get into it. Soon Zubx husband is out of hospital. He is staying at his home, alone. He is so miserable now that he has lost. everything. His mom and stepdad have cut him off for the most part, except during visits with our daughter. His mom told me that he is going to sign away his rights once I get married, if that is what I want. According to her, he wants to reconcile but knows that I'm not willing to do so. He wants his life back before this whole Carla debacle started. He isn't fighting custody at all either.

He doesn't want any more visitation than he already has. He is willing to pay child support and alimony to speed along this divorce. He is cognizant of the damage he has done to our family. For context, my mother cheated on my father, and it broke up my family before I was old enough to even remember. Their divorce was final when I was only a year old, and my mother abandoned me. I cannot stand cheaters. They destroy lives.

James understands this too. Cheating is that hard line for me, so James knew he effed up. Right now, I have an appointment Friday for a discussion with my lawyer about the terms of our divorce and formalizing custody. James' parents are helping me with arrangements for my own apartment. Thank you, everyone. I won't update again until the divorce is final, which should be in three months at least. Goodbye for now. And that ended up being the O.P.'s final post.

But I hope that the O.P. and the O.P.'s daughter are doing better now. My female 44 hired an investigator and have discovered my husband's M47 affair and intimacy addiction. What on earth do I do next? My husband M. 47 and I female 44 have been married for just over a decade, and it has been, for the most part, a loving marriage centered around our two beautiful children. Of course, I've had grievances. He travels a lot for work, is constantly glued to his phone, and sometimes would abruptly pop out for errands. that he always has been incredibly vague about. Initially, these didn't concern me that much. He has a very demanding job

that has allowed us to have a lifestyle I never thought possible. Meant that I could leave work to be with the children, take us on wonderful holidays, send the children to a great school. I always felt that complaining to him about his work, phone, computer, and random emergencies, would be so selfish considering everything he does for us.

However, two weeks ago, I started getting really suspicious after I had found contraceptives in the inside pocket of his blazer. There was no reason for him to have it there, as we only have intimacy at home, and frankly, it isn't something we do as often as we used to. This prompted me to do something I never thought I would do,

but I found an opportunity to get into his phone when he wasn't looking. I'm not sure what I was looking for. I first looked at his photos but couldn't find anything. Then I thought I would check his messaging apps. WhatsApp, telegram, both were password locked, which I found very odd. Only I message could be accessed, but there was barely anything there. At this point, I had a sinking feeling something. was up. Last year, a friend was in a similar situation and used a digital investigator to learn

more about her absent and secretive fiancé. The investigator found out that this man had been living a complete double life with a long-term girlfriend in Edinburgh, and unbelievably, a whole business he had set up and was earning money from. She had no idea about the business or all the money he was earning from it and no doubt spending on his girlfriend. I asked for the investigator's details and requested that they pulled together anything and everything they could find about my husband. The investigator spent about a week digging online and came back to me with a report that changed my life forever. I got a call from the investigator, warning me that my husband's report would be a very difficult read. And that I, I got a call.

I should open it in private at a time that I would be able to process it fully. Since I received it, I have barely been able to eat, sleep, probably take care of the kids, or speak with him. And yet he is so absent-minded, he doesn't even realize something is wrong. It turns out that my husband of over 10 years has been, number one, having an affair with a woman 15 years his junior. Number two, financing this woman's lifestyle and her failed business venture. Number three, attending intimacy parties with her, where they have intimacy with other partners. Number four, posting in a revolting online intimacy forum, including pictures of his junk and details, his addiction to

adult videos and escorts to his creepy online friends and number five based on this post online has clearly been spending thousands on escorts as far back as seven years ago i have no idea where to go from here i don't know what to do i have no idea how to confront him about this or if I should see a lawyer first. I know the obvious decision is to simply divorce him, but our children are nine and seven. I have loved him since we first met 14 years ago, and I know that I have a place in his heart too.

In spite of these actions, if he is truly an addict, then maybe there's a way to get through to this if he agrees to treatment. I am a complete mess, and I can't talk about this too. anyone in person just yet. Any advice you have for me would be really appreciated. And now let's get into some of the top comments. One user says, do not confront him. Go see a high-powered attorney to see how you can come out on top. A good lawyer will get him to cover

services. Get your financials together. Get spousal support. Sue for compensation. The money spent on escorts and affairs, child support, have him cover college for both children. Pay for all the schooling and insurance until 26. Get the child tax credits for each year. Because of his chronic infidelity being the cause of the divorce, you can get more than half in the divorce. Also see if you live in states where you can sue for alienation of affection, get tested ASAP. Let your lawyer guide you on. what to do before you let them know. Also, see as many high-powered attorneys as you can so you have

the best shark and cripple his ability to use them as a lawyer. Don't forget all of his assets, investments, and retirement. Ask for forensic financial audit for any hidden money. Bill him for everything and do not leave the marital home. Make sloppy D-word move-euvre move-eval. out. I'm sorry you're dealing with this, but you got to strike hard and be smart. And don't silver line anything or take his word on anything. And the

OPEE replies and says, thank you for this. Sadly, because we are in the UK, cheating doesn't have much of a bearing on divorce outcomes. However, my solicitor is among the best in the UK and I trust that

we are going to do some real damage. Another commenter says, Whatever you do, and there is great advice in this thread, please don't blame yourself. There's enough evidence in his behavior to indicate that he'd have done this to anyone. And there's nothing you could have done to foresee this or prevent it. Whatever pain your children will experience from your split will be 100% his fault and you don't deserve to feel any guilt or shame.

And the OPE, he replies and says, I'm still struggling with feelings of guilt. I know this is his doing, but I often feel as though I am a bad mother by not letting my children live in the same home as their father. And another user says, I'm sorry you're going through this. Please excuse me. How much does it cost to hire a private investigator?

And the OP says, hello, sorry to only be responding now. It costs 250 euros for an individual. initial sweep, and then once some fishy things were found, I paid more for some additional hours of digging. And another commenter says, I'm sorry you're going through this. Please seek

out a therapist for some support. And please know, you deserve better. And the OPE replies and says, I am planning on getting therapy soon. Once things calm down a bit and I can have a bit more time to myself. And then

finally, another commenter says, number one, talk to a lawyer before you do anything else. Number two, no, it's not something that will be fixed or cured via therapy. Therapy only works if the person does the work. It isn't a magical cure that resolves giant issues just because you schedule an appointment and show up. The reality is you have been married to someone who is capable and willing to lie to your face systematically. Therapy doesn't just fix that. In fact, he probably has a personality disorder, which I suspect based on your post about his behavior.

He likely will never change. And number three, do more research into pathological love relationships. Briefly, ask yourself these questions. Does he have difficulties with empathy, egotism, exploitiveness, aggrandized sense of self, disorded perceptions of self and others, self-serving, boundary violations, blame shifting, low remorse, low accountability, motivated by power control, personal gain, just a brief place to start exploring who you are actually married to.

And finally, number four, talk to a lawyer and a therapist before doing anything. someone who specializes in pathological love relationships ideally. And then we get an update one and a half months later from the OP, and the post reads as follows. Firstly, I'd just like to thank almost every single one of you who has commented to leave me advice or message me privately. I took a lot of advice on board, especially legally speaking, and this has proven to be of great benefit.

I apologize for my long, absence and lack of replies. I hope the update below can explain it. I chose to wait until after New Year's, as I did not want to rob the children of one last Christmas and New Year's holiday as a family. In the meantime, I researched solicitors and sought recommendations from trusted friends. Rather, humiliatingly, I did. After much urging on this website, also schedule and go.

through with an SDI test. It was horrifically embarrassing, but I am relieved to say that it came back negative. I don't know how I could have coped if he had gotten me sick because of his revolting actions. He made my job incredibly easy by flying out for a work trip, not that anything he says could ever be trusted. On the second, and I immediately got the ball rolling. Met with the solicitor, packed up all of his belongings into six suitcases, had the locks changed, and spoke to a child psychologist to work out the best way to explain things to the kids,

who are far too young to understand, the full picture, of course. Fast forward to a week later, and upon his return, I, having made sure the children were picked up by my mom, after school, greeted him to a hallway full of suitcases and divorced papers. I had printed out the report in full and started walking him through it before he started breaking down in tears.

It was a compulsion. He was unbelievably stressed and that if I left him, he would have no choice but to marry the other woman. Whereas he would end it immediately if I were to take it back. This last part was truly the nail in the coffin. I don't think he even realized just how manipulative a comment that was to make. After hours of a back and forth and of his groveling, he gave up. He was left at the bottom of the stairs in the entrance to our home with his suitcases, waiting for a cab to take him to God knows where.

There is still a lengthy legal process ahead, and unfortunately, it turns out that him being unfaithful, etc., doesn't really impact how assets might be divided following the legal battle. However, I'm confident that my solicitor will get the outcome I need to keep the house and live independently. In terms of the children, I would rather not discuss them so as to keep it private, but it has been incredibly difficult adjustment, and sometimes I do feel guilty. As for myself, I am still completely heartbroken and frankly, I don't ever hope to find love again. I just don't think I can quite trust like that again. Finally, I'd just like to say that while most comments have been lovely and supportive,

I did get a number of comments and private messages blaming me for my soon-to-be ex-husband's behavior, claiming I did not give him sufficient intimate attention and that I shouldn't complain because he provided me with a certain lifestyle. Firstly, these comments are awful and betray a repulsive worldview with regards to intimacy and marriage. Secondly, our alien intimate life was not my doing and was at times and criticism I myself had of our relationship, not the other way around.

Thirdly, just because someone provides you with a lifestyle doesn't entail them to treat you as if you're nothing. With no respect and no honesty, I would have hoped all would be aware of that. And now let's get into some of the top comments. One user says, affairs do matter if you can account for all the money he spent on the other woman. You deserve half of that, and it is often awarded in court because he spent marital money, which is half years. Come through credit card and bank statements for hotel, restaurant, gifts purchased, that you never received, etc. This process is painful, but you deserve your half of everything he spent on dating her.

If you can't bring yourself to do it, hire someone who will. It can also be used as a powerful bargaining tool if he doesn't want to be used as a powerful bargaining tool. if he doesn't want other people to know what he did. And someone else says, hours of groveling, what a sorry reaction. Anyways, I'm glad he didn't get you sick. And I hope the best for you and your kids as you move on.

And finally, someone else says, what a ridiculous thing for him to say. You have to stay, or it'll be your fault I marry this other woman I've been having intimacy with. All I can say is I'm so, so, so sorry. Also, get ahead of him and put it in custody agreement that this woman is to have no contact with your children until they reach the age of 18 and decide for themselves if he chooses

to stay with her, as she is 50% of the reason they're in need of therapy. But if he meets someone else, same with you. The relationship needs to be going strong for over a year before any introduction. Keep those kids safe. And then the OP comes back two and a half weeks later with a final update and let's get into it. I never imagined that a single Reddit post would change my life in such a profound way. To everyone who commented, messaged and supported me, thank you. Your advice, encouragement, and even tough love gave me the clarity and strength I desperately needed.

I am really sorry if I appear to have ignored some of your comments and DMs. I just wanted to thank you all and leave this final update. I will check and try to respond to messages and comments as much as I can. In the weeks following my last update, I have been navigating a completely new reality. The legal process is still ongoing, and while my solicitor has warned me that things could get complicated, I am standing my ground. I want a clean break, financial security for my children, and a future where I am no longer tethered to a man who deceived me in every way imaginable. The fact that his infidelity does not significantly impact the division of assets is a bitter pill to swallow. But I will not let it deter me from seeking what is fair. Thankfully, some aspects of his actions that the investigator uncovered will impact his case negatively.

Emotionally, this has been one of the hardest things I have ever endured. The betrayal still cuts deep, and some nights, I find myself questioning everything. I repeatedly keep on going back and forth over years together, trying to pinpoint where I missed the signs, where I ignored my instincts. The truth is, I may never fully understand why he did what he did, but I have finally come to accept that his actions were never a reflection of my worth. I was not lacking. I was not failing. He was. Since our separation, my soon-to-be ex-husband has fluctuated between remorseful,

and completely delusional. One day, he is begging for another chance, promising to change, telling me he will attend therapy and fight for our family. The next, he is enraged that I have ruined his life and taken away the stability he had with our children. He has tried to paint himself as the victim, conveniently glossing over his years of deceit and betrayal. At one point, he even,

even suggested that we could remain partners but live separate lives, his way of trying to have his cake and eat it too. The most frustrating part has been when he makes an argument that this was a mental health issue or an addition issue. Actually, it is 100% an entitlement issue. I have a lot of supportive people on here to thank me for making that very clear to me at a time when I was is doubting this. The manipulation has been exhausting. He has reached out to mutual friends, attempting to garner sympathy, and twist the narrative. I have had to set firm boundaries and remind myself that I owe him nothing. The man I thought I knew was gone, if he ever truly existed at all. His behavior in the past few weeks has only reinforced my decision to walk over.

away for good. For those wondering about co-parenting, it is a work in progress. I won't share too much for privacy reasons, but he is currently on supervised visits while we establish a longer-term arrangement. The children are adjusting as best they can, and I am doing everything in my power to keep their lives as stable as possible. They are my focus now. And they're well, being is my only priority. As for myself, I am healing. Slowly but surely, I have reconnected with old friends, thrown myself into activities that bring me joy, and even started to look toward the future with something resembling hope. I won't lie. Trusting again feels impossible right now. Love, at least the kind I believed in, feels like a distant and naive.

concept. But I also know that I am stronger than I ever thought I was, and that gives me faith that I will rebuild in time in my own way. I could have never imagined getting through this when I had first made my post. Here I am, sort of, on the other end of it, still just about To those who may find themselves in a similar situation, please trust your instincts. Do not gaslight yourself into ignoring the signs. If you don't have 100% certainty, find a way of getting it like I did. Either try and gather evidence yourself that you can use in court or hire a PI investigator like I did. And most importantly, remember that betrayal does.

not define you. How you rise from it does. This is my final update. I am closing this chapter of my life for good. Thank you all, truly, for being a part of my journey. Am I the asshole for writing a letter to the judge in my brother's case asking her not to give him the minimum mandatory sentence? My brother recently entered a blind plea in federal court on two rather heinous um s related offenses admitting his guilt rather

than going to trial putting his sentencing in the hands of the federal judge based on the sentencing recommendation submitted to the court by a probation officer after reviewing the evidence in the case interview with my brother

and reads any letters of support or victim's statements my brother is a repeated defender at the federal level. Previously arrested in 2004 and served seven years. He was released in 2011 and supported 100% financially by my mom and stepfather. My mother blamed herself for staying in an abusive marriage to our biological father. In 2015, after four years of living on his own, he violated his probation on the state level three times from 2015 to 2018. He was most recently released in 2019 and he was able to get a full-time job.

Get in an apartment and seemed like he had sort of gotten his life back together. Last July, he was arrested by the feds again for two near identical intimate related crimes. and by intimate I mean S, and I can't say the whole word, but you know what I'm saying. The OP continues and says, really bad stuff. Having to tell my mom he was in jail again was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. She was devastated. Seeing that I know my brother better than anyone else, the prosecuting attorney agreed with my decision to write a letter to the judge

and probation officer giving insight into my brother in our very messed up family background that was filled with all kinds of abuse and info about who my brother was, both the good and the bad. My brother is a pathological liar, a narcissist, and can somehow charm people into thinking like he wants, except women. He is an in-cell at the worst level. I wrote the judge to beg her not to give the minimum mandatory, sentence of 15 years. He is facing life. I gave a very clear explanation as to our family history, my brother's previous questionable actions that were red flags that we all missed, and I also included a notarized statement from 2014 that my brother wrote and gave to me detailing his abuse

as a minor. When I was going through court actions of my own against our father, in that letter, he admitted to things he was never charged with. Well, now that the sentencing report was finalized, my brother and his attorney were given copies of my letter, and he went nuclear on me in an email to my stepfather, saying how my letter to the judge is the nail in his coffin, and he blames me for what he realizes will be a very long sentence. My stepfather thought I was being a bit vindictive

that I included the 2014 statement, my brother wrote because he feels it was unnecessary. While I don't hate my brother, I hate who he becomes, and if he is ever released, he will re-offend, and that scares the hell out of me. Am I the asshole for riding the judge?

Edit to add, these recent charges do not involve him violating minors, but rather position and distribution of illegal content, involving minors, which is just as if not even more horrible, because it just continues to add to the cycle of abuse worldwide. Additional edit, for those of you wondering, the statement he wrote, which I had was something he wrote, notarized and gave to police when I filed a criminal complaint against my father in a state we lived in when I was a minor that had no statute of limitations. I honestly

even after his probation violations, which were state charges, never thought about that letter slash statement, as I had severed contact with him at that point. I didn't remember I still had a scanned copy of it in an old email until the prosecuting attorney and I were speaking about his abuse and our family life growing up. So it's not like I intentionally withheld this information. It was given to police a decade ago, and I had forgotten about it until a few months ago. And now let's get into some of the top comments. Someone says, Not the asshole.

As a SA victim, I thank you. I have watched as the family and friends protected and defended my assalter. Choosing right over blood is brave and gives hope. You are incredible. And the OP responds and says, The kicker here for me is that I was essayed by my father. for almost 10 years, starting when I was very young. When I finally spoke up about my abuse when I was 27, my brother initially chose to believe my dad over me.

While my father was teaching my brother things no child should ever learn, and twisting his mind when it comes to what healthy behavior was, my brother ultimately chose to become like his father. His recent crimes were internet related. And another user says, Not the asshole. And I think you're very strong to do what you did. And right. Are you sure that your stepfather is much different than your biological father? Or your brother, since he went nuclear on you for telling the truth?

And the OPE responds and says, I can say, without a doubt that my mom's husband of 20 years is no way, shape or form like my biological father. He just thinks I was being vindictive towards my brother, and that including the statement of my brother was unnecessary. Another person says, The statement you wrote, the part about him writing about committing crimes he hasn't been tried or convicted of, the judge really isn't allowed to let that part influence their decision.

Only his past convictions and current one that's in the sentencing phase is what she is allowed to consider. So tell your stepfather that, but I advise that you cut off your brother completely. If or whenever your parents bring him up, I would completely disengage from the conversation. Be very clear, you don't want to have anything to do with him

or hear about him. And the O.P. responds and says, I severed ties with my brother long ago. However, I have to deal with the negative ramifications when I see my mother, who suffers from dementia and depression. Lose her will to lose. live because of his actions.

And someone else says, this isn't super relevant, but I'm curious as to where your biological father is currently, because I'm hoping it's the same place as your brother, at minimum. And the op he responds and says, he died in 2015 from cirrhosis of the liver and kidney disease. I will say this. In 2014, after a lot of therapy, I was finally in a place. where I felt strong enough to pursue criminal charges against him. I drove to another state where I was abused as a minor for three years, as they had no statute of limitations, and I met with an investigator in the town we lived in,

and they decided to pursue the case. He violated not only me, but my best friend at the same time, and the two daughters of family friends. With their statements, my case was brought before grand jury, and he was indicted on four Class A felonies for R word. He was arrested in Florida and extradited to Alabama. He was released on bond in a month before the case could go to trial.

He died. I firmly believe he got the ultimate sentence. And someone else says, not the asshole. It's sad to say, but thousands, if not millions of minors deal with abuse in all forms. and not all of them turn out like that. What your brother did was a choice he made and continues to make. It's clear he has secrets and in large, a lot of the secrets you probably don't know are far worse than what you see now.

To many families want to defend family for one reason or another, and it's a relief to see when family finally takes into action things that should have been done years ago. All the nails in his coffee, were all placed there by him, and he isn't sorry about what he did, just sorry he got caught and will never change this way of thinking.

You're helping. May others, especially minors, from having to go through similar abuse along with any future victims who might have to face something far worse because crimes like his only escalate and end in the worst way. He could have been the next toy box killer

and you just saved so many people who didn't know it yet. Your stepdad is pathetic, and I would be wondering if he was too part of this, and if he was also involved in these crimes due to defending your brother. And the OPE he replies and says,

My stepfather married my mom 20 years ago, and honestly is a wonderful man. This situation, however, was him questioning my motives in including the letter to the judge. He feels like I am being, vindictive and making him pay for the sins of my father. The only reason he supported my brother was due to his love for my mother. My brother's actions caused so much conflict between my mom

and my stepdad as my mom is an enabler and my stepdad truly loves her with all his heart and didn't want to end their marriage because of my brother. So no. My stepfather is in no way shape or form a bad person. And then we get an update nine months later, and the update reads as follows. Some of you may remember the post I did back in June, and July asking if I was the asshole for sending a letter to the judge who was deciding my brother's criminal sentencing.

In it, I asked her not to just give him the minimum mandatory sentence detailing our family history and providing more insight into who he was as a person, as he 100% deserved the full sentence recommendation determined in his pre-sentencing report. I had people comment that they'd like an update, so here it goes. After about four sentencing delays, he finally went before the judge and was sentenced to the max allowed in his case. 27 years in federal prison. While I hate that, this is the way his life turned out, and that he will spend pretty much the rest of his life in federal prison, but these are the choices he made.

These or heinous crimes against minors who will have to deal with it the rest of their lives. It is only right that he has to suffer the consequences of his actions. Do I regret sending that letter to the judge? No. Not for a moment. As a victim of abuse by our father for almost 10 years, the fact is that he perpetuated the abuse of others through his actions, and my brother knew how my own abuse severely impacted my life. While I know he has severe psychological issues and an adult video addiction due to abuse and indoctrination by our father, it does not excuse him.

In my eyes, it makes it worse. So to some, it may seem like me writing the judge was an a-hole move, but my conscience is clear. And now let's get into some of the top comments. Someone says, It is sad that I'm saying this, but thank you for doing that very hard thing. And it's a good thing that he has gotten the maximum possible sentence. I sympathize with him in the sense that if he has,

hasn't been abused and grew up around abuse, he may have had a very different life. However, after this many offenses, it is no longer about punishment or deterring him from doing it again. He has to be put away because as long as he is free, he is going to hurt more minors. It would be reckless for him to be set free. You did the right thing. I am so sorry for everything your family has gone through. And the OPE responds and says, While I agree with you that had our growing up had been different,

his life might have been put on a completely different trajectory. That being said, he had repeated opportunities to seek intensive counseling help, to change his life around and truly redeem himself. Instead, he chose to become an even worse person that he was, the first time he was arrested by the feds. It is all about choices in creating your own destiny. And another user says, Have you told your parents off yet for defending that POS?

And the Opie response and says, My mother is the only one in the family who is in contact with him and she has mid-level dementia, but still feels the guilt for staying married to such an a-hole. They divorced in 1999. Although she never knew of the abuse, all the rest of us have severed contact. When he gets out, if he makes it that far, he will have no one. No money, no place to live, no car when he is roughly at 78 to 80 years old.

And finally, another user says, thank you. As a fellow survivor, it's a relief to know that one less perpetrator is running around. How did your mom and stepdad take it? And the opi response and says, Stepdad agreed it was the right sentence, as we learned a few things in the months of the delay. That showed him once again. My brother was selective in what truths he told.

His probation violations were more than what he told us they were for. My mom still talks to him on occasion on the phone, but has not seen him since 2021. She is cognizant enough to know he, belongs in jail, but still feels responsible for staying married to her father, although she didn't know any of this was going on. To her, he was a domestically abusive, alcoholic adulterer, and she felt trapped. And this was the last update we have ever received from the OP. I 26 female opened my husband's 32 male Snapchat, and it was a very very,

explicit picture and caption from a girl. He's sitting not 20 feet away from me and I don't know how to handle this. Well, title kind of says it all. Throwaway because my husband is active on Reddit. He's probably on it now. Here it goes. I've been with my husband for five years, married for one and a half. I've never once doubted his fidelity. He's great. Super smart, funny, handsome, and I thought, loyal. He's never given me reason to doubt him or be suspicious.

I thought it was kind of odd when he downloaded Snapchat. He's not big on social media. I have one, but I'm not very active. We rarely snap each other. He said his friends were really active and he liked it better than Facebook. So, as I said, I've never had any reason not to trust him. So I thought nothing of it. This morning, my husband was in the shower and left his phone on my nightstand.

I was half asleep when his phone started chirping and woke me up. We both have the same phone in ringtone for text messages, Not knowing that he had put his phone on my nightstand for whatever reason, I thought it was my phone in my half-asleep state. Despite his black phone case, mine is green, I didn't even notice and I looked at who had texted. It said, Mom. Okay, my mom texted me.

I can ignore that until I'm actually awake. But under that was a Snapchat notification, A snap from someone named Roxy. I was like, who the F is Roxy? And why is she Snapchatting me? I opened it and bam. It's a picture of a girl's no-no square. And not the meowing kind with four legs and a tail.

The caption said, I'm not going to read this verbatim because it's just super, super explicit. but they said, I don't even know how to say this not explicitly and just grossly, but they said, I want your tongue somewhere. Somewhere, no,

no square. That's like, okay, I'm just going to leave it at that. That's uncomfortable enough. And the O.P. continues and says, now I immediately thought it was a mistake, but I was alert now after being awoken by a cat. I pretty quickly realized that this was my husband's phone.

I felt like, like I was going to crap the bed and started to sweat. I looked at his contacts on Snapchat, and she has a yellow heart next to her name. I looked up what that means, and it means they are best friends. WTF? I feel like I'm going to be sick. I didn't do any other snooping because, honestly, I know what I'll find. I just don't understand how he could do this. We're happy. I thought, we were happy. We have intimacy a lot. And here's the real kicker, Reddit. I'm almost 12 weeks pregnant with our first child. He's sitting in the recliner about 20 feet away from me right now, and I just can't find the words to confront him. How do I say what I need to say? There is no way I am

somehow overreacting or misreading this situation. Is there? I'm heartbroken, and don't know what to do. Update, first and foremost, thank you for all of the love and support. I feel it from here. Honestly, thank you. It's amazing to me that strangers care so much about my baby and me. Love back to all of you. So, my husband knows something is up.

I don't know if he saw that I opened a Snapchat from Roxy and is afraid of what I saw and afraid to bring it up, or if he's clueless and can just tell that I'm upset about something. He's been asking me if I'm okay or if something is wrong about every hour. I told him my sister was having a hard time. Ironically, she just broke up with her boyfriend. Why? He cheated. And I was going to go over to her place for dinner.

I live in Pacific time zone and to spend the night with her. I'm here now. My sister is 20 and a whiz at the social media thing. She stalked his Facebook to see if this Roxy person popped up anywhere. She looked through his friend's friends, bingo, and we found her. Well, now least I'm pretty sure. I didn't see her face to the Snapchat. The screen was too full of her crotch.

She's Facebook friends with my husband's good friend. She is listed as a receptionist at my husband's friend's law firm. My husband works a couple blocks from the law firm, and he stops by often to grab lunch with his friend. So that would explain how they met. Still formulating a plan on confrontation, trying to get as much information as possible first. My sister wants to burn his life to the ground. And honestly, I do too. But I'm going to address this in the most adult.

way possible so that I can walk away from him with my head held high and be a deserving role model to my baby girl. Not sure it's a girl, just a feeling. Good news, my uncle is a lawyer. Most of what he deals with are divorces. I've already contacted him and asked if we could discuss some potential legal issues. Didn't specify what yet. Feels like something I should do in person during our meeting. I told him it was urgent. We are meeting tomorrow morning. I will try to update as much as I can and from the bottom of my heart. Thank you all again, internet strangers. And then the OP gives us an update two days later, which reads as follows. Again, I am overwhelmed by the support and love I've received from everyone. It feels great to be comforted and cheered on by

you all. Thank you so much. So, husband cheated. He has been since, quote, maybe two weeks before last Christmas, according to him. I was very calm when confronting him and took the advice many of you gave me by telling him that he needs to explain to me who Roxy is and why she is his best friend on Snapchat. His face gave him away immediately. but he still tried to lie to me at first. He said that she works with his friend and they met when his friend invited her out to lunch with the two of them.

At first, he claimed he only met her about two months ago. He said that they're best friends because he doesn't receive many snapchats from others and she is extremely active on the app. He said she just sends randoms and is really into fitness, So she sends a lot of inspirational snaps on being healthy and living a better life.

He said that every once in a while he'll send her something back, like a picture of a cheeseburger or something, just to tease her about her level of health consciousness. First, I asked why he didn't just tell me about her. He said he didn't even think about it because she's just an acquaintance, not even a friend. Then I asked if he'd ever received anything even remotely inappropriate from her. He answered with, not on purpose.

I'm assuming he went with that because he knew I opened that Snapchat and he probably knew it was a bad one. I asked what not on purpose means. He got very defensive, started raising his voice and saying he doesn't need to explain what that means. that sometimes people accidentally send the wrong Snapchat's to the wrong person. Then he had the nerve to say something along the lines of, I feel like I'm on trial here.

People warn me that you get crazy when you're pregnant, but I never thought it'd be this bad. Now, as some of you mentioned in my last post, it seems amazing that I'm able to keep such a level head. That is because I was raised, by a mother who always told me that you never accomplish anything with anger, that you can be emotional, passionate, upset, etc., without ever raising your voice. Messages received quietly and concisely are just as loud and clear as messages received

through yelling and screaming. That is how I have lived my life for 26 years. with the exception of just a few blow-ups. I am human. This moment was an exception. I didn't exactly yell and scream, but I became furious. For him to try to blame this on me being pregnant,

how unoriginal and offensive. Long story short, he said he'd never seen me this crazy, and I told him that I'd never seen a picture of another girl's cat on my husband's Snapchat before. He came back with that. I shouldn't have looked at a Snapchat.

I came back with that it was an accident, but even if it hadn't been, there shouldn't be any reason he's receiving Snapchats like that for me to see accidentally or not in the first place. I told him that I may be pregnant,

but I'm also an intelligent person and I am his wife. So I knew he was lying, and I deserved to know the truth. I asked if I could see his text messages to see if he's been texting Roxy. He said, sure. No messages.

Then I asked to see his Facebook messages. He looked like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He told me no. I asked him why. He finally broke and started to cry. Told me he couldn't let me see the messages because they would hurt me. Because they were inappropriate. Then it all came out.

They screwed in the backseat of the car the first night they met. This is already long, so I'll spare you the details. But it's been an ongoing affair for months now. No, they did not always use protection. Although I was recently screened for STIs, I'll be getting checked again in light of this information. My uncle already assured me that if he was unfaithful, we would cream him in court. Really, the only thing I'm willing to fight him tooth and nail for is our home. I put a lot of effort and money into making this home my dream space.

I won't be seeking spousal support, but I will seek child support. I'm obviously heartbroken and told them to go stay in a hotel or with Roxy for all I cared. I confronted him last night. My mom and sister stayed the night with me last night and let me sob all over them for hours. Right now, I'm sort of numb, but I'm also thinking very clearly. I know what my next 10 moves are, and I feel supported and secure in my decision to leave him and keep my baby. A few things I just wanted to clarify. My husband is not a lawyer.

His good friend is. There was some concern for my success in courts if my husband is a lawyer. His friend is in environmental law, so while I'm sure he can provide some advice, he will not be my husband's divorce lawyer. There were suggestions of me terminating my pregnancy. I fully support the right to choose, and I would probably terminate the pregnancy if I was in a different financial position

and lacked a support system. However, I work as a marketing manager for a large company. Not only does this allow me the privilege of working from home about 50% of the time, but it also grants me financial independence. I do not rely on my husband for money, and I never really have. He works in tech, so,

while he makes a good salary, I will have no need for spousal support. I have a phenomenal support system. This baby will be loved so dearly by so many. Yes, I will have to deal with my husband for the rest of my life if I have this child, and it will make my future relationships for me more difficult, but it is so worth it.

I've wanted this baby since day one, and I am her mother, which means that I'm strong enough to raise her alone because I have to be the strong. Here's to hoping for a speedy divorce. I'm ready to be done with this marriage, and we'll keep our baby. I'm numb, but calm, and feeling good about my decisions and how I handled the situation.

I know there is a long road ahead of me, and this will all probably hit me really soon. When it does, I'll mourn and grieve the end of what I had thought was a happy union. Right now, I'm in self-preservation mode and much more focus on how to come out of this in the best position possible. Thank you so much for all the advice and support. Update. I know it has only been a short time since I posted this update, but I need to tell you all how amazing all of you are. Wow. This support is just wow.

I wish I could reply to all your comments and messages, but because of the volume, I'm just going to say thank you from the bottom of my heart to each and every one of you who read my posts, who commented, thought of me, wished my baby and me the best, messaged me, and anything else. I am currently at my parents' condo, sitting outside at their pool, sunbathing, my little baby bump, and reading each and every one of your amazing and empowering comments. I just want you all to have that image,

that you have made me happy and content in a time when I am short of both. This is proof that love, does exist, even if it doesn't within my now over-relationship. And that is a powerful thing. Love to you all. Me again. I was going to post more details on what happened during the confrontation with my husband,

etc., but then I decided against it. I should keep some details private. It's likely my husband has seen this post. I will leave you with this. My dad and I were up late talking last night, as usual. He had the perfect thing to say to me. He told me that weak people are afraid of strong people. He told me to keep on terrifying the weak ones.

That way, the only people who won't fear you are the bravest, strongest to people. And those are the people who are worthy of you. Then he said my husband is a spineless turd who couldn't kick it with the strongest woman in the world. Just thought I'd leave you with that and encourage everyone to be terrifying by being strong and not standing for nonsense. This is the last I will post on the matter. I have a lot ahead of me with everything and will probably go quiet on Reddit for a while.

Time to get ready for court and to be terrifying. Thank you all. Thank you again. Love to all of you and best wishes. love tea my girlfriend had a meltdown and fell asleep on my couch and the post reads as follows last night my 25 male girlfriend who is 27 female came over to drop off a package that was sent to her house instead of mine she's been struggling with depression recently and for the last two weeks she has not been acting herself at all. It seemed like she had not slept in days and her usual high energy self

was not there. I asked her if she was okay numerous times, but she kept pushing me away and gave one sentence answers about how she is fine and I didn't need a worry. I know she has a history with S word, but that was when she was a teenager and she has not thought of committing an S word since she was 16. When she came over, she was in really bad shape. Her hair was messy and there were bags under her eyes.

There was some indications that looked like S-H and she was bleeding. Her voice was groggy and she was extremely quiet. She came into my apartment, put the package on the kitchen counter, said goodbye

and tried to leave immediately. She thanked me for being a good boyfriend, which caught my attention. I felt a sense of doom, so I stepped in front of the door and told her to stay for the night. She told me to move, but I said she was not in a good condition, to drive, and something bad might happen. Suddenly, she hit me in the chest and said she wants something bad to happen. She broke down in tears and cried about how stressed out and unappreciated she felt. She talked about how she was the perfect student and went to Berkeley like her parents wanted and became a nurse, but they never showed any support for her career. She gets pushed aside and hates how all the attention goes to her sister, and she feels unnoticed.

She cried about how stressful work has been and how understaffed her hospital is. She has not slept in 37 hours and tried to go to bed a couple hours earlier but couldn't fall asleep. She said how she hates her body and how much she struggles with maintaining her weight. I picked her up and brought her to the couch and she continued crying and told me she thought about crashing her car multiple times on the way to my apartment

and I would be better off with her being no longer alive. She finished off by saying she doesn't feel human and how difficult it is to get out of bed then fell sleep in the middle of crying. That all happened in about the span of 10 minutes. I laid her down on the couch and put a pillow under her head. I stopped the bleeding that was going on on her arm and put some bandages on the wound after I cleaned it.

I put a blanket over her and stroked her hair for a while. I started crying watching her sleep. I knew she was going through a rough, time, but I did not know how bad it was. I got a blanket and pillow and slept in front of the couch in case she woke up. It's 10 a.m. right now, and she's still sleeping. She's been asleep for 14 hours and has not moved. I don't know what conditions she's going to be in when she wakes up, but I hope she is calm and open to talk about getting help. Edit, thank you for the replies. She woke up a couple hours ago after sleeping for 16 hours and she explained everything.

She was at work two days ago and an elderly patient yelled at her and shoved her. She reached her breaking point and when she got home, she threw out her antidepressants. She gets a refill on Thursday and went into a manic episode. She went to work yesterday without sleep but walked out an hour into her shift and relapsed into S-A-chin. She decided she was going to drive and crash, but wanted to see me one last time, so she dropped off the package to do so.

Thankfully, I saw the signs and stopped her, and she had her breakdown. She asked if I could stay with me for a couple of days, so we drove to her apartment to get some things, and she played music and sang her heart out. She wanted wing stop, so I stopped to order her something, and she ran into the grocery store, nearby while I was in line and got her favorite ice cream. We drove back to my apartment and

eight, and she is currently taking the shower. I think she's going to quit, to be honest. I saw a comment asking me to call out for her, but I think she's going to call out entirely. She seems burnt out. I'm also going to bring up the idea of her talking to a therapist again. Thank you for listening to my ramble, LOL. Your support means a lot. lot to me. And now let's get into some of the top comments. Someone says, good work. This sounds rough. I hope she can make it. Nursing is not a safe career anymore. I would encourage her to apply for stress leave. She should talk to her HR. And the Opie replies and says, she has the mentality of going to work and refusing to look weak, but that mentality is destroying her.

She is going to resist applying for stress leave, but last night is something I don't want to happen again. She mentioned the possibility of changing careers recently, though, so I hope she looks into that idea. And someone else says, thank you for sharing this. As someone with a history similar to your girlfriends, I really appreciate reading this and having that reminder of not being alone. And the OP replies and says, thank you. You are never alone.

And then we get an update four days later from the OP, and let's get into it. The update reads and is titled, My Girlfriend Showed Up to My Work Drunk and High. A couple days ago, I posted about how my girlfriend was in the middle of a mental crisis and fell asleep on my couch for half the day. She took a mental health leave from her job and found a therapist this morning who she says will begin to see her next week. She got her medication refills on Thursday and has been trying to relax, but when I came back home later, she was not there. I texted her, and she said she was out with friends and would be back soon. She came back a couple hours later with a brown bag, but did not tell me what it was.

She went into my bathroom to hide it and told me not to open it. I was a little concerned, but decided not to push it. It turns out she was hiding booger sugar in the bag. I am a firefighter, and I work today. And the next two days and tonight, she showed up at my station, drunk and high out of her mind. She knocked on the door, and my lieutenant opened it, and I immediately recognized her drunk voice. She stumbled in asking where I was and started crying when she saw me. My lieutenant told me to take her home, so I guided her to the car and drove her back to my apartment. She started yelling

about her job out of nowhere, then fell asleep. When I reached my apartment, I carried her up the stairs and sat her down on the couch. There were wine bottles and a line of booger sugar on my kitchen counter. I called the station and said I'd be back in about an hour and cleaned up the kitchen and made sure she had no risk of Odean. I have never been more mad in my life. I am okay with alcohol in my apartment, but any kind of drugs are unacceptable. My father was a drug addict, so drugs are forbidden from my apartment, and my girlfriend knows this. I am upset about that, but showing up inebriated and high at my job in front of my coworkers is even more unacceptable. I have been trying my hardest to put myself in a position to move up a rank,

and now I am the guy who had to drive his drunk girlfriend home. How did she even get to the station in the first place? I hope it was an Uber or something. I love my girlfriend with all my heart, but she needs to find serious professional help. I have been able to weather her manic episodes, but this incident is something I'm not going to be able to let her go quickly. I know she has mental health problems,

and it's something I have to accept to be with her, but she is not taking her health seriously, and it's affecting her life, and it's starting to affect mine. She says she was going to admit herself to a psychiatric hospital on Thursday, but it's Saturday morning and she's in my apartment passed out on my couch. I love my girlfriend. I really do. The past four years with her have been amazing,

but she keeps getting worse and it's getting harder to help her. I watched my mother ruin her life trying to fix my father, and I don't want to end up on the same path as her. At some point, I have to draw a line. Update, she took herself to the hospital, and admitted herself. She sent me a picture of the sign-in sheet and apologized for her behavior. I don't feel anything at this point.

I got a break from her for a while, so that's nice. And I might break up with her. And now let's get into some of the top comments. One user says, be careful. Self-sabotage in this case can be a sign of S-word. testing a partner to prove that they deserve better if they break up and then using that as motivation to commit S word. Another user says, let her go.

And someone replies that and says, she needs help and stability now more than ever. She's hitting rock bottom right about now. Maybe he's not equipped to deal with this kind of pain. And I wouldn't hold it against him if he had to let her go. The drugs are, Crossing those lines she knows exists for him is another way she is trying to self-sabotage her relationships, and it seems to be working, which scares me even more.

And someone else comments and says, Significant others are not substitutes for professional therapy. They are there to help you walk so that you can run, not to carry you when you cannot walk at all. I would do anything for my wife without question, but I am under no obligation to do so. I chose to bear burdens for my wife, knowing that if it ever gets too much,

I would bring in professional help. Assuming that your partner will help you through life-threatening situations without taking your medication or committed to therapy, it's nothing short of selfish and self-destructive and should be treated as the desperate cry for help and support it clearly is. and someone else commented and says, You can't fix stupid, but you can die trying.

She needs help. Frankly, O.P., from the outside, your girlfriend has long crossed any lines a sane person would draw. You need to end this relationship before your job and possibly your freedom are jeopardized. What if some of those drugs entered your bloodstream via skin contact when you were cleaning? and then you had a drug test at work. Create a paper trail of your actions and or a journal of incidents and cover your ass. And then the OP comes back with an update about two weeks later, and the update is titled,

My girlfriend broke up with me through a letter, and I miss her. And the update reads as follows. My girlfriend was released from the psych ward yesterday and decided to break up with me for a while. She suffered a massive mental health crisis a couple of weeks ago and ended up taking a mental leave from her job. She showed up at my work drunk and high on booger sugar and I had to take her home. She admitted herself to the hospital the next day and stayed for two weeks before she was released. Last night, she knocked on my door before running back to her car. She left a box with all my things from her apartment and a letter attached to the box.

In the letter, she said she needs to take a break from our relationship so she can take care of her mental health. She is in an extremely unstable condition and is receiving treatment for depression. She does not feel safe being around anyone at the moment and does not trust her self. to make logical decisions around people. She is taking her medication and no longer feels like the world is ending, but she is going back to the hospital to receive assistance with her depression. The next three pages of the letter were filled with her expressing her love for me and apologizing for her behavior.

Because she knows, I do not want drugs anywhere near my apartment, she asked one of her coworkers about a person they know who sells booger sugar, and she bought some. She bought it in a brown bag along with some weed and hoped I would look at it and break up with her. When I didn't, she decided to do the booger sugar and then put some on the kitchen table. She bought 10 bottles of wine and drank two of them and scattered the bottles around the apartment before taking an Uber to my job. Because I was the only thing that was stopping her from committing S-word. she hoped that I would get mad when I saw her walking into the fire station wasted

in the state of my apartment when I brought her back and break up with her. Despite my anger, I did not break up with her and she ultimately decided to check herself in to the hospital. She dedicated one page to apologizing for her actions and all the things she did before because of her mental health. She doesn't deserve a patient boyfriend like me who has the biggest heart in the world, and she is afraid of corrupting me.

She told me to find a woman who does not have the same problems as her and treat that woman with the same respect I gave her. The last page was her telling me how grateful she was to have me as a boyfriend and she could never repay me for the five years of love I gave her. She does not know when she's going to feel ready to be in my presence again and told me not to come to her house to talk to me. She also drew a portrait of me

while she was in the hospital and attached it to the letter. I started crying in a way I haven't since I was a kid. I knew what I was getting into when I met her and I never held her mental health against her. She always told me what emotions she was feeling and it helped our relationship greatly.

This is a very serious situation and I'm glad she recognized she needs professional support. instead of trying to deal with it all by herself. She's had episodes before, but nothing like this. I miss her. I miss her so much. My apartment has been quiet for the past two weeks

without her being loud and creating noise, and I hate it. I miss holding her and rubbing her back while she fell asleep. I miss the streak of blonde hair and her black hair and her beautiful eyes and how she always smelled like lavender. I miss cooking for her and making dinner, so she had something to eat after a shift. I miss the smells of whatever recipe she was attempting to replicate from Pinterest. I miss the video of Daniel Craig saying, ladies and gentlemen, the weekend. She would send me every Friday after 5 p.m.

I miss her chicken and spam, Musubi, and her cooking. She made two dinners of Katsu and curry, and put them in my refrigerator before she started her booger sugar plan. and every bite I took made me miss her more. I miss exercising and doing ab workouts with her. I miss trying new hiking trails with her. I miss watching whatever dumb reality TV show she was obsessed with every two months and her asking a million questions every time she watched a sporting event with me. She was the love of my life,

and my life feels incomplete without her. I told my mom and younger sister, we were taking a break, and both of them said she feels like a member of our family. I miss her. The last four years have been the happiest times of my life, and now all I feel is numbness and sadness. Whenever we had disagreements, they never lasted more than two days, and we apologized if one of us said something mean.

She was the place I called home, and the only person I feel safe confining in, and now she's gone, for I don't know how long. I want to be right by her side, giving her a hug and telling her how strong and beautiful she is, but I can't. I know she's serious about improving her mental health, and she's making an effort to get her so that makes her feel at peace again. I hope she's able to find a sense of calmness in her mind. I collected all her things and dropped them off at her house this afternoon, then got on the highway and just kept driving for an hour. No music or anything.

Just the sound of cars in my thoughts. She deserves to be happy and feel like she wants to live. It hurts to live without her. Edit, she has never done drugs before. This was the first time she ever bought or did drugs. And all right, guys, that wraps up some deranged Reddit threads. And I really hope you guys enjoyed today's video. If you did, please leave a like down below.

and subscribe to the channel and comment down below your thoughts on today's video and i just want to say thank you guys so much for watching it truly does mean the world and your guys's support is just insane we have the best community here like truly you guys are the best fans on all of youtube you guys are the best make sure you follow me on instagram and follow me on spotify that also helps a ton and once again thank you guys so much for watching and this was snook and i'll see next time bye