Switched on Pop - The best (and worst) of holiday music in 2024

Episode Date: December 13, 2024

It's an annual tradition: Every December, artists release their bids to join the hallowed halls of holiday music history. The gold standard remains Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas Is You," which reportedly earns the pop star $2.5 million annually in royalties. This year's crop of seasonal offerings spans from ambitious originals to reimagined classics, with artists trying everything from AI-generated lyrics to funk renditions of Hanukah hymns. To evaluate this year's entries, we're introducing our definitive sleigh bell ranking system: five sleigh bells marks a future holiday classic destined to join Mariah in the pantheon, while one sleigh bell promises pop obscurity. Songs Discussed: •Kelly Clarkson - You For Christmas •Orville Peck - Happy Trails •Conan Gray - Holidays •Dan and Shay - Take Me Home for Christmas •Amy Grant - Tennessee Christmas •Kesha - Holiday Road •Ben Folds - Xmas Aye Eye •Jennifer Hudson - Santa for Someone Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Attention Spotify. Has arrived the new Good Girl Jasmine Absolute of Carolina Herrera, a fragrance intense with character gourmet and addictive. Imagine a jasmine emvolvente, toffee caramelized, and tonka-tostata. A combination that seduce

from the first instant and he has aweller. Good Girl Jasmine Absolute, hypnotica, irresistible. Discover it now and let you move over for susentia. Welcome to Switched on Pop. I'm musicologist Nate Sloan. And I'm songwriter Charlie Harding.

Charlie, it's December. They're in New York. I know you're donning your finest winter ensembles. I have my giant I'm freezing cold parka. Yeah. Your turtlenecks, your bomber jackets, your English hunting coats. I know your whole sartorial repertoire. You love to bust these things out at this time of year. Beautifully knit hats by my mother. Out here in California, it's hot, but I think we'll have some snow on the mountain soon. And that means it's time for one of my favorite annual traditions here at Switchampop. Our round-down

up of the best and the worst of pop stars holiday offerings. You've actually found some best? You say that was such derision, as though year in, year out here we don't discover little nuggets of Christmas gold amongst the commercial dross that these artists churn out in a cynical calculating ploy for a maximum return on investment. It's the thing you can count on every year,

an infinite supply of new holiday music that will never be listened to ever, because Mariah Carey gets slots 1 through 10 on the holiday charts. You're right. This is as reliable a tradition as lighting the tree at Rockefeller Center. These thirsty singers release their attempts at biting off a chunk of that elusive Christmas cookie known as Eternal Royalties. And as you aptly state the gold standard here is Mariah Carey, whose all I want for Christmas is you,

Nets the Pop Star, an estimated $2.5 million annually, according to the account. Not bad. I would like a piece of that Christmas cookie. All right. So what are we going to listen to today? We'll go through a few categories. We'll go through original songs. So new songs written specifically in Anno Domini 24. Exciting. We'll listen to some new cover songs of classic Christmas tracks. And then we'll move a little further afield. I want to hear the weirdest new Christmas song. And I want to hear what we might think is the sleeper hit of this season. Okay. Can I suggest a ranking, one to five sleigh bells. One to five sleigh bells, five sleigh bells being like this is set to join Mariah in the pantheon of Christmas classics.

Yep. And one sleigh bell being Darren Chris's cover of Joni Mitchell's River, for instance, which I don't think we've discussed on the podcast by putting a newsletter once because it is one of the most unholy things I've ever listened to. Yeah. All right. Let's dive right in. We're going to start with a perennial Christmas contender.

Kelly Clarkson. She has a new song called You for Christmas. It's produced and co-written with some heavy hitters, Mark Ronson, Andrew Wyatt, and I think when I spin the chorus, you'll hear exactly the kind of vibe she's going for. Yep, five sleigh bells instantaneously.

It has everything. Motown productions, lots of chromaticism, infinite sleigh bells, huge vocals. I love this. You're such a pushover. That was all it took was 10 seconds of throwback Motown harmony. But I don't disagree.

And as we listen further, we get some more fun Christmas ear candy. I mean, killer call and response background vocals here. That syncopated lead. You're bopping in your seat right now. I love that syncopated lead line. Ah, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da. Oh, it's so good. Who is she referencing here?

Is this like kind of Supremsy? Supremsy. I feel like a lot of these. of these Christmas songs reference the oer text of Darlene loves Christmas baby please come home. It's always so strange when your favorite holiday songs are produced by a convicted murderer. In the music industry, we have to be specific, you know, which convicted felon we're talking about. And this particular one is Phil Spector, whose wall of sound production style is an undeniable lasting influence in the world of pop music, even as his personal misgivings are something we'd rather forget. Back to holiday cheer and Kelly Clarkson, who is really knocking

out of the park, I'm stunned. I am not usually a sucker for holiday music. I think this is great. I love the references. I think we've established previously. In order to make a good holiday song, holiday music is always referential to the period of time where classical pop merged into rock and roll and R&B. That is when holiday music is at its best. And this song is in that time frame musically. Makes sense that we're working with Mark Ronson, who is just the producer of yesteryear nostalgia. Right.

And Kelly Clarkson's got the vocal chops to pull this off. She's one of those contemporary pop singers that has true diva vocal qualities. And you kind of need that if you're going to be doing a Motown style song. And she's proved her holiday bona fides before. Right. In fact, the last time we did this, I think we argued that Kelly Clarkson, with her song Underneath the Tree, and Ariana Grande with her song, Santa Tell Me, were the artists in the 21st century most likely to join the likes of Mariah and Darlene Love in that Christmas canon. You know what? Compared to her new song, that's giving like Hallmark Holiday special. It's good, but I think the new one's better. I agree. I think this supersedes her previous Christmas. offerings. There's a section later in this song where we get even a kind of sultry version of Kelly Clarkson that I don't know that I've heard before.

This is a little sexy Christmas here. Charlie's blushing. I know. I'm clutching my pearls. This is fun. I'm taking one sleigh bell away for so brazenly coming from Mariah. Right? You said the song is called You for Christmas, which is so close to all I want for Christmas is you. It's just kind of an inversion of the idea. But I'm going to give that sleigh bell back because, again, I think the production is so good here in comparison to her other, you know, whatever, throwaway song, which used kind of like contemporary drum production. This is totally organic. It's fitting right in the pocket of that groove, but also the retro Motown vibe. It feels like it could have been produced 75 years ago. I love it. Five sleigh bells.

All right. A strong start. Let's see if we can keep it going. Next up is a new original holiday track that's a little more pensive, a little more melancholy. It's from Conan Gray, and it's simply called Holidays. I'm so tired of taking orders from everyone. And my house is like a hoarder's my bad undone. Books at all.

Never read in magazines. Your quizzical expression tells me that you're wondering how the song is connected to the holidays at all. Yeah, this is a sort of nice L.A. folk pop song. Reminds me a little bit of the new Sean Mendez record, which we haven't spoken about. I actually think it's really wonderful. I like it a lot. But yeah, I'm not getting holiday qualities. I mean, maybe sitting next to a fire playing the piano solo, but it's missing all of the necessary.

qualities to be that retro holiday thing that I so admire about the last song. It's a different take for sure. It's the experience of coming home to the holidays revisiting your childhood bedroom, revisiting some memories that you might have been trying to avoid and confronting them head on. I think it's refreshing, at least. I haven't really heard that approach to the holidays before. And it's written with some real all-stars in the pop world, Dan Nygro, who we know from work with Olivia Rodriguez and Chapel Rhone, Ethan Gruska. Oh, that's why I heard the Sean Mendes record, because Gruska also works on that record. I think, by the way, one of like the most fabulous producers working in pop music right now.

Let's see if this trio can spice it up for us in the chorus. But we keep on growth. Life exactly the same. When I see you for the whole. Uh-oh. Oh, no. Whistles. Getting a little lumineers.

Hey. Oh, it's coming back. Okay, so now I feel like I understand this song better. I'm not sure it gets laybells because I'm not sure this even truly is a holiday song despite its title. Like for me, this song has more in common with, like, Lover by Taylor Swift. We could leave the Christmas lights up until January. This is our place. We made the room.

First of all, I have to point out, we've had a long running gripe in my family. Leaving the Christmas lights up until January is not transgressive. Maybe if you have housekeepers that take them down for you on the day after Christmas, fine. But the line should be February. Nonetheless, lover's a great song. And it's the kind of song that is equally fitting for a holiday time, but could also be Christmas in July. It's a song that you can play year-round and reminds you of the holiday times, but isn't on-the-nose Christmas music. And I feel like that's the same sort of thing that I'm getting from our friend Conan Gray.

All right, two songs in and we're already having an ontological discussion about holiday music. I see your point, and I guess my feeling is time will tell, like Joni Mitchell's River, for instance, which I referenced briefly earlier. Is that a holiday song when it was released? Did people perceive it that way? I don't think so. It's a song that kind of has this theme of winter and longing and loss. But over time, it has become part of the holiday canon. Maybe it depends on how listeners perceive this song and how DJs program this song in their Christmas playlist, et cetera. And we'll see whether it is an outlier or something more central. There are some songs that could soundtrack really nicely to a film that happens to take place in the holiday period.

And then there are other songs, which are go buy stuff at Macy's. And for me, the go buy stuff at Macy's Christmas music, that's kind of one. what I'm expecting. Yeah. We'll get some of that in a bit. Okay, great. So I'm not sure if I'm giving any sleigh bells yet, even though I really like this song. Before we go to Macy's, let's take a trip to Nashville.

Another song which I think you might put at the periphery of this canon, based on its subject matter, Happy Trails by Orville Peck. Venus at night, first up in the sky, even watching her. from different beds there's got to be happy trips ahead so you're giving us some more covert holiday music here right yes i like orville peck i made sure to go out of my way to see his set at newport folk this past summer and he blew everyone away especially with his song cabboys are frequently

secretly fond of each other a duet that he does with willie nelson Cowboys are frequently secretly fond of each other What did you think all them saddles and boots was about? That's good. I love this song. Orville, I feel like as part of this big gate crashing of country that's been happening over the last few years and, you know, for him proving that there's queer space and country music

and part of the way he does that is he really pulls on the references of older country music. He's doing sounds that you would hear in the 50s. He has a voice that sometimes reminds me of like a queer Elvis. And so when you play me happy trails, I'm getting a lot of that nostalgic vibe, even if I'm not yet hearing obvious sleigh bells or like hints that, hey, it's Christmas time. All I want for this Christmas is you. It's in that era of nostalgia. And so I think it's earning some sleigh bells.

How many sleigh bells are you thinking here? Can I hear the next section? Slay bells, sleigh bells, so many sleigh bells. Did we just get another sleigh bell after hearing literal sleigh bells? We have literal sleigh bells. We have sort of the Nashville big orchestrated sound that reminds me of like Patti Klein. This is definitely earning its sleigh bells. I'm going to give it four.

One more quick thing here, Charles. Listen to the very beginning of the track. Holy night. What do you think? Yeah, 100%. I did note that the song is in 6-8. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, which we had also heard in Lover. And there's something about that compound feel that, I don't know, why is it holiday-esque?

Do you have a grand theory of waltiness? All I can think is that back in the 1800s, a lot of the Christmas carols that we still know today were written. in triple meters or compound meters, O Holy Night, Silent Night, O Christmas Tree, O Tannenbaum. So maybe when we hear those triple meters today, we're kind of reminded of those days of caroling of yore. But we've got to move on, Charlie.

For Slaybells, that's a good rating. I promised you Macy's. Here's a new song by the country duo, Dan and Shea, Take Me Home for Christmas. Baby, won't you take me home for Christmas? around your town Take me where you used to watch the snow Come, you'll check it

If you take me home Very curious to hear your thoughts on this. Okay, this is as smooth As a perfectly wrapped present. I will say, when I heard the line, you'll check every box off my list All my brain could think was

And I want to give you a gift. It's my Dick in a Box. It's my Dick in a Box. Okay, did you get that out of your system? No, it's going to take the whole holiday season. However, there is something about the holiday season, as much as it's about gift-giving, spiritual revelry.

It is a time of romance, and I feel like the Dan and Shay song, just like our friends at the Lonely Island, are playing into this history of, you know, what I want for Christmas is you. I want to unwrap you, you are the present. On one hand, I think Dan and Shea are a pretty interesting, group within the country sphere.

I remember eons ago we talked about their song Tequila. And I was fascinated how this duo was able to introduce a EDM-style post-chorus pop drop into a traditional country song. We get a similar effect in Take Me Home for Christmas. What is the word for this genre, which is the combination of funk and country? It has to be funk tree, unfortunately. I really kind of like it. I love a telecaster guitar.

I love twang. This is trying to do anything more than exactly what it is. I think I definitely get some sleigh bells. Three, perhaps? Yeah, I'll give it three and a half. Three and a half sleigh bells. Three and a half sleigh bells. Wow.

All right. Yeah. I don't think it's going to compete with the biggest holiday songs of the year, but I think it's a great little novelty, like a perfect holiday present where you're like, oh, that's delightful. I'll forget about that next year. But I really like this present. Okay, so there's our patented sleigh-bell ranking for new offerings from Kelly Clarkson, Orville Peck, Conan Gray, and Dan and Shea.

Let's take a quick break. And when we come back, let's hear how stars are putting a new spin on some of our favorite holiday classics. Maria, you have a podcast now and you need to start acting like it. What's the first step as a podcaster? Well, you have to ask lots of questions. I'm Maria Sharpova, and I'm hosting a new podcast called Pretty Tough. Every week, I'm sitting down with trailblazing women at the top of their game to discuss ambition, work ethic, and the ups and downs that come on the path to achieving greatness. I have a few pretty tough questions for you.

Okay. Ready? Ready. Do not sugarcoat something for me. No. No. We'll dive into their stories and get valuable insights from top executives, actors, entrepreneurs, and other individuals who have inspired me so much in my own journey. Pretty tough is your front row seat to the women who have done.

demonstrated the power in being unapologetic in their pursuits. I hope you'll join us. New episodes drop Wednesdays on YouTube or in your favorite podcast app. There's always such a glut of holiday covers each year, Charlie. I had to go through and just pick some of the ones that really stood out, whether for good or bad. And since we just did a whole episode about the legacy of Fleetwood Mac, we talked to Andrew Byrne and Madison Cunningham about covering Buckingham Knicks, this kind of legendary lost album.

I want to hear a cover of Lindsay Buckingham's Holiday Road. You know this song? Do I? I don't know. It is literally the first thing you hear when you watch National Lampoon's vacation. I have a really indelible memory of watching that movie and hearing this song. I think you'll recognize it. Brig in any bells?

Absolutely know the song. Didn't realize it was a Lindsay Buckingham song. Even he is not shameless enough to avoid the desire for these annual royalties. You know who else isn't? None other than Kesha. Lover. Whoa. It's like Devo did a cover with Kesha about Lindsay Buckingham.

What is this funny 80s synth pop? I'm not sure what to make of it, but I have to say that I don't like. it. Oh. And I know you do because you're like, you're grinning ear to ear. And I just, and I hate to drop that bomb. But I don't know. I feel like the whole point of the original is that it's kind of silly and frivolous and fun. And when I hit play on this Keshe version, it's so serious and sanctimonious and like ethereal. Really? Yeah. Let me hear a little more. Okay, but what about those times when you're driving down the Highway 1 in Malibu? and you're in your Lamborghini and you're just like on lots of uppers.

It's the 1980s and you've got to be singing holiday songs. Right. It's a weird combo. Right. What you're describing is like if the weekend covered this song. Yeah, it kind of does have that vibe. That's not what I want. I want Kesha, like remember when we listened to Joy Ride, her comeback single earlier this year?

Love Joy Ride. It was fun. It was silly. It had an accordion. Like, that's more what I want from Kesha's holiday release. This is a little too sanctimonies for me. I'm giving it. two sleigh bells. That's fair. Okay. Sorry, Kasha. Okay, so far we have only been in the world of Christmas,

but it's time to take a trip to my traditions. Here, a nice Hanukkah classic, one of the most celebrated songs of the Jewish tradition, Mao Soir, which translates to Rock of Ages. Here's a group I would not expect to be covering this song. The Bay Area Funk Legends, the biggest nastiest horn, section on the planet Tower of Power. Ooh. So this is taking a holy religious song and making it a sexy song because I don't speak Hebrew. I don't know what they're saying.

It sounds like the words are important, but the music is super, super bedroomy. Yeah, we've got these slick guitar parts, these sensual organ pads, a thick backbeat and later in the track we'll get an English version for you Charlie accompanied by those iconic horns a Jewish holiday song with epic modulations that owes everything musically to the black church this is a wild song there's a lot going on here I love it all five sleigh bells six sleigh bells okay one more in our covers division here let's go to an artist that I don't think we've ever talked about before on this show. Amy Grant.

Oh, great. Interesting figure. At one point, the queen of contemporary Christian music, now more of a sort of pop country crossover artists. And she's doing something where she's actually covering herself. Here's her 1983 track, Tennessee Christmas. And here's the 2024 version. It's nice. I like the constant harmonic progression that's happening in the song. The update is a little bit more intimate. But for me, it's missing those great big strings, which string sections were a part of the Nashville sound back in the era that also Orville Peck is referencing, like the Patsy Klein era. And so I like the string sections, which to me read very holiday things.

throwback. And yeah, I'm wanting them on the updated song, even though I think it's a really nice vocal, really sort of intimate approach. But, uh, eh, I don't know. Two and a half stars? Two sleigh bells. It's hard to top yourself. I mean, it also reads a little bit as, I don't know, maintaining some copyright, trying to get some new printings, maybe trying to get hold of some master recordings you don't own. That's kind of the things. Speculating here. Interesting. Amy Grant had one of the biggest holiday albums ever back in the 90s with Home for Christmas and kind of started this trend of artists releasing their own Christmas albums. I agree. I think this redux version 30 years later is actually more effective than the original in a lot of ways.

Feels a less schmaltzy. Her voice's age like fine wine. But yeah, I don't know if this has like that umf factor to really put it over the top. I'm going to say three stars. Why are you moving to stars. We're not doing stars. We're doing sleigh bells. Sorry, sorry. Sorry. And I want to point out for everyone that's only getting like two or three sleigh bells, each sleigh bell has like seven bells on it anyway. So you're getting a lot of bells, even if you're only getting two or three total sleigh bells. Am I making sense here? I see what you're saying, yeah. I also realize, I feel like you and I are having some difference today. Uh-huh. You're really liking the sort of honest, raw, personal side of the holiday songs, whereas I think I realize I just want total candy cane, sweet, obnoxious commercial holiday

music. I've given it. Well, maybe we can split the difference by going to our two final categories. Okay. Weirdest Christmas song and Sleeper Hit. And let's start with the first of those. Ben Folds released a Christmas album this year with a great title, Slayer, S-L-E-I-G-H-E-R. curious how he's going to do this. Slayer, I think of as heavy thrashy guitars, Ben Folds as a pianist,

what's going to happen? There's a lot of compelling tracks on this release, but I feel like one really speaks to our modern moment, and I'll let Ben Folds explain it himself. It's 2.36 a.m. Sunday, May 26, 2024. The cicadas are measuring 85 decibels on the back porch. I'm almost done with this album. I just need one more. I've got my clavinet, my drum machine, and my friend Ross with this harmonica,

but I need some lyrics. I'm turning to AI, as it was called, in the parliance of today. Okay, I'm going to dial up, chat gibbet, blah. Robot, give me some lyrics. Christmas.

AI, and you complete me. Okay, make it run and make it good. Okay, I've been skeptical and have even reported on air that like, oh, artists aren't using AI that much yet in pop song, so I'm curious where he's going to go with this. This is a fun conceit, right? He's like, I need one more song for the album. It's the middle of the night. I'm just going to ask Chad ShoePT to write some lyrics for me. Here's what it produced. This is X-MIS, A-I, spelled A-Y-E-E-E-Y-E.

night a tail involves a tecter light snowflakes falling soft and light AI whispers Nope not impressed negative two sleigh bells negative two sleigh bells negative two sleigh bells Negative sleigh bells is what you want here because you hate it so much yes now are you down on the use of AI or is it the actual sound of this recording i'm down on the use of AI but maybe not for the reasons you might assume. I think that the joke of, hey, I had AI write a thing was funny when chat GPT was three months old. It's two years old now. And I just think that it's not a good enough joke to sustain itself. It's like one of those endlessly long SNL sketches, which was funny at 3 a.m. when they wrote it, but it's one idea and they run that conceit for seven minutes. I don't know.

It's got a good baseline, but I think that the chorus refrain is blah. And the lyric, are bad. If anything, I like that it's making fun of the idea that there are like contractual obligations that must be met. Yeah. You know, Prince famously made bad records to get out of a record deal. Like, maybe that's what's good about it, that it is so brazenly commercial like holiday music. So maybe I'll even that out and give it just zero sleigh bells. I feel like it's my responsibility to give Ben Folds some more credit for this album because it's not all like this. I just thought this was an interesting and unique kind of approach to the Christmas canon. Let's hear a bit of another song from Slayer, Sleepwalking Through Christmas.

I'm sleepwalking through Christmas. Everybody thinks that I'm awake. I keep my eyes open. I'm eloquently spoken of this might be. Nice. He's a great melodist. Yeah, that's more like it. It's a great sort of classic old.

It looks like it's going to be an AABA kind of song. has those old vibes that I need from a holiday song. I like it. All right, to bring this thing home, here's my contender for this year's Sleeper Hit. I don't think this is necessarily going to make the same splash as your Kelly Clarksons, your Conan Gray's, etc. And some artists we haven't even mentioned here, Sabrina Carpenter has a Christmas special. Jack Antonoff and Bleacher's released a Christmas song this year. There's a lot of material. I'm just doing, you know, the stuff that kind of stuck out to me. And out of all of this, what may not make the biggest impact immediately, but I think it will stand test of time is a song by Jennifer Hudson, an original called Santa for Someone.

here. I like it. I like that it's called Santa for someone. I don't think it's referencing my favorite Clero song of this year, sexy for someone, but that's what it made me think of. I'm grooving. I'm having a good time. What happens in the chorus? I just want to get your presents from the heart. But the ones that you won't going to break my credit card. I'm running around and it's got me your stress. I just want your Christmas, baby, to be the best. Oh, I got to be, got to be, got to be. You know, as upbeat as this song is, perhaps the most positive of everything we've listened to in terms of its musical choices today. Yeah.

This also has kind of the realist message of anything. Even Conan Gray's Sackeren, yearning for lost love, this is even realer than that to me because this is something that few Christmas songs actually talk about, which is how freaking expensive it is to buy gifts for everyone. You're going to max out your credit card. Yeah. And that's perennially true, but especially in 2024, I mean, it is rough out there. People are living hand to mouth. People are struggling. And Jennifer Hudson is obviously not the first person to comment on this, but she might be

the first person to put it into a potentially hit Christmas song. You've managed to remedy the only flaw that I thought I found in this song, which is that it's a little contemporary referencing credit cards, which didn't exist in the holy days of nostalgic holiday music. but the holidays have also always been as much of a pleasant time, also a stressful time, and trying to figure out how are we going to make this work? And so in the endless amount of new holiday music that comes out that kind of blurs together, I feel like she has definitely found a new way into this kind of song.

And there's only one way to end a song like this, which is with some Mariah Carey-esque vocal runs. That's a party. Five sleigh bells? Five sleigh bells. Charlie, it warms the cockles of my heart to gather with you. each year and discuss all of the highlights and low lights of the Christmas holiday season. I can't wait to do it again next year. One problem, Nate.

Did you get anything for me for Christmas this year? You know, the mail system has been really wonky lately. Postal workers on strike. I think that strike was canceled. Possibly got lost in the mail. That's unfortunate, but it happens. What about you, Charlie? Where's my...

Well, there's always next Christmas. I'll see you next Christmas, Nate. This has been really fun. This has been so much fun. And... Brutal. Nate, in a year where people are worried

about maxing out their credit cards for Christmas, my gift to you is the gift of friendship. Can't put friendship underneath the Christmas tree, Charlie.

Ooh. This episode of Switched on Pop was produced by Jake Cassman, engineered by Bill Lance, edited by Art Chung, illustrations by Ars Gottlieb. We're a member with the Vox Media Podcast Network,

production of Vulture, which is part of New York Magazine you can subscribe at NYMag.com slash pod. Find us on social media at Switched on Pop. We just joined Blue Sky, so you can reach out to us there now. I'd be curious to know which of these songs you think

got the proper or incorrect rating from us in terms of our slave bill system. And if there's any other 2024 releases that we should have included, let's make the ultimate holiday playlist. We'll be back next Tuesday with a regularly scheduled episode and then again on Friday with some more holiday music. We're excited to catch you then. And until then, thanks for listening. Thanks for listening. Thank you.