Test Match Special - Ask the umpire - Trees, Sunhats and Clicky Ponting

Episode Date: September 4, 2026

Former international umpire Ian “Gunner” Gould answers your questions alongside Jonathan Agnew and Vic Marks. So, what happens if you accidently throw the ball into a tree or onto a fallen sunhat? When do you step in to diffuse a difficult situation and what action would Gould have taken if he’d umpired a “clicky” fielder.

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ad-free with an Amazon music subscription. This is the TMS podcast. From BBC Radio 5 Live. It's Ask the Umpire. And I thought, a promising debut, I thought, given by the newcomer, the debutant in the series against New Zealand. So having him back, actually. But he's always surprised us, you know.

He has always surprised us. No, I think he got most of them right. So anyway, it's great to have Ian Gould back again. But I'm going to. Actually, you're a great success. First time, thank you. And you've always entertaining stories and so on. You've got, you see, these are all, they're all bona fide questions.

Victor and I haven't sat down and made these up. These are questions from listeners, looking for, well, looking for definitive answers. If you can provide them. I've known you two for a very long time. And if you think I'm going to start believing that, let's move on quite quickly. Before we look to the questions, seriously, we had that incident up in Yorkshire of the finger-clicking which made the national international news. What do you make of that, Gunner?

I mean, have you come across that before? It was different. It even made the Slough Observer that, did it? Yeah, it was different. And it goes back, I go back a very long time. Kent members probably remember this gentleman. A chap called Colin Page, who was their coach, which made it even worse. And we had a very sort of lively coach as well in himself in Don

who was in for fair play, as Don always was. And Colin Page started this trick. One afternoon, I think it was at Beckonham, Barclays Bank, Beckonam or whatever it was in those days. And he kept running up, and we kept hearing this clicking. And what's that? And then it all came out. It was Colin Page, he bowled it,

and then his left arm, right arm over, as he bowled it, his left arm came through and he flicked it. Oh. At the vital moment. At the vital moment. And dear old Don, who was a very, was a very fit man, played football for Coventry and Arsenal and played cricket the Middlesex. He came chasing across the field. It was actually hilarious.

It might get him herself and a few 15 and 16 year old boys going, well what is going on here? And these two were having a finger wagging moment but it is I've never seen it before. I've never heard of it before until now this has come out but it did make press didn't it? It did make press and. Presumably. Who was in on it, Johnny? Well, come on. The Wikikeeper must have been in. Come on, we've got to, if we're going to be unfair on this bowl and pick him out.

The Winkeeper must have known. He must have known, sure. But this is the first time it's happened? Wow. Or is it a routine they've been learning in the bar? People said it's happened a lot, but the thing the difference with this one was that it was filmed, wasn't it? So it's actually people could see it online and they could make up their own minds about what was going on. I think that's the difference.

I think there's been these sort of tricks played for years, hasn't they? But I was surprised that the umpire could hear it. I mean, it must be a hell of it. of a click for 30 yards away for an umpire to hear that and also to get the timing right you know it's got to coincide with the bats from missing the pool one so what happens legally then as far as if you if you if you think you can spot that happening or hear it happening what what intervention have you got available do you reckon i reckon you have uh i've got fraser stuart sitting behind me head of laws and whatever don't worry about that i'd be phrasing i would be diving into spirit of cricket

Is that spirit of the game? Is it fair play? Disrepute? Are you distracting the battsman? Bata, sorry? I suppose disrepute is more the authority's decision rather than you don't deal with that. That could be for the administrators to deal with afterwards. Yeah, you would.

But you're doing spirit of the game. Yeah, you would report that and you hand it over to the ivory towers. Yes. And then come out with their thoughts and probably be in 2029. It will come out as much. Well, there we are. It's all a bit quiet on that front, isn't it? Gone very, very quiet. I mean, to be fair, the fellow accused of doing it,

or alleged to have done it, I mean, his life has just made absolute misery, wasn't it? I mean, people piling in. I mean, I hope he's okay. Just clicking his fingers. Well, I don't know. My schoolteacher used to do that, and he's still going, alright. I just hope he's, I think he's all right.

Anyway, right, let's start with this then. I'm going to go first. This is from Jenna. Now, this actually happened in a match. Brackett, not a very high-level match. close brackets that's always that's always a bit of a red flag anyway a delivery flicks the batsman's pad while passing the bat at the same time the bowler appeals the umpire asks what are you appealing for the bowler is puzzled and he says lbw the umpire says not out

the bowler then says well what about court umpire then says you're only allowed one appeal So it's not out. Is the umpire correct? I believe so, because that could be a long-standing game, that one. Just keep asking. Just keep... The only thing is that with technology, though, when they do a review, they go right back

and every decision can come into it, can't it? Yeah, it did in the first test when Pallas gave one of the batters out of Tong, I believe, nipped back, and it went through, and they went for a court behind, which was given not out. It was a brilliant decision, but it did hit his back left. So you look for LBDU. So then the third umpire will then go back and say, right, I'm now going to review the LBW. But are you, do you have to ask what you're appealing for?

I don't think no, umpire's ever said to me what are you appealing for? No, no, I did think, I did ask someone someday, did it? Because it just looked after and I wasn't sure. If he got it, if it wasn't, what was you? It's not good news for the bowler if you're asking. Well, what are you appealing for? Well, you're just staring at him. I remember doing a game in, in Melbourne, Pakistan and Safran.

was their captain, a bigot keeper. This guy bowed an absolute beauty and went past. And to me, I'm standing there and going, he's missed out by six inches. They reviewed it straight away. My heart stopped. Bump, review. Everyone's jumping up and down.

And I did say on the stunt mic, if that is out, I'm walking off this ground right now. Thankfully, you missed it by a mile. I don't know what they were trying, but you do have those moments where you're not sure. Yeah, of course you do. all have so quick is. Yeah, it is. Yeah, when you get these, I mean, the great thing about DRS now is spectator sport now, DRS, and you put your pint down. You put it down and you're going to watch this. Yes. But if you're an umpire, you're going, oh, no.

Tell me, the top umpires, because obviously when it came in, the umpires were saying, oh, it's undermining our authority of it. But I, I always think nowadays that once the umpires are out there and all the reviews have gone, suddenly you're under, more pressure, aren't you? So you actually quite crave there being some reviews left, don't you? You're desperate, Vic. You're desperate. I mean, you look at Nathan Lyon to, I think it was Stokesy and they came a head in leave. Yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah. And Joel Wilson standing there and going, please find me a review. No reviews left. Nothing left. He come up on the big screen, didn't it? Yeah, yeah. No reviews left. Yeah. You could see Joel go, oh my God, not out. Not out. And, you know, I can't remember if England had a review left.

They did. So he could have said out. And then, I mean, did that go through? You haven't got time to think about that, I guess, as the umpire. They've got one, so give it out, and they can review it if they think is not out. Yeah, I think your heart is racing that much. Especially that. And you've got tense.

And you've got tears in your eyes. And you're thinking, I've got this wrong and I just wrecked a really great game of cricket. But you must, by contrast, you must enjoy it when someone reviews your decision. And then you can go to the third unpoint. They confirm your right. You can give it the old. Yeah, it's lovely. You quite enjoy that.

Yeah, I didn't do that very often. Sure you did. I crossed my arms an awful lot. My last decision in world cricket was a review. Rishant Pant. He tried to hoik one out of headingly off a seamer, and I thought, well, it's hitting him in the midriff, but then I forgot that he was on his knees trying to sweep one.

So I gave it not out going on. The bloke they asked. I said, no, it's going over. He was hitting up four inches up middle. And then I thought that's time to take time. I'll see. Anyway, I've got one here from someone you probably know. He's called Greg Denton, who said he was a groundsman at Sussex for 17 years.

And he prepared the fishes for many games, which you umpire. So he was in your umpiring career and he says hello. But he said, my question is from a groundsman's perspective, is there a law which prohibits the practice of scraping fielding positions on the square with one's boot? It happens, something that happens quite a couple of times at home when I was there. I've also experienced it at my club ground in Perth. it's intensely irritating and put an unused pitch in jeopardy

but can you do anything about that? No. You can't. All you can say is probably I'd recommend you stop doing that because there's a groundsman standing on the boundary with a fork in his hand which happened here and bless him, Michael.

Someone was at midwicket on his test match just about to describe an X. So Mick in his wisdom run to the tavern I can imagine what the language was like. Oh, well, it was lively. It was lively.

He run to the tavern and got 24 beer mats. So when you were fielding and he had to move, you had a beer mat. Oh, really? It was as fun. He just stopped the game. You come walking on Mick. And he was, you know, we all know Mick. Great character.

Oh, yeah. Brilliant character. But no, Greg. And hello, but no, there's nothing. That's down to you, mate. Right. Simon Hull, this is nice because actually this refers to my old ground, actually. And 10 years ago, it still irks.

I like these ones, so Simon. So the last few things I've played for Ufford Park Cricket Club, that was my little village club between Peterborough and Stanford. I was run out running from the non-striker's end. The ball was fired down the leg side. Stryker missed it. We ran, but I was run out by a strong throw from fine leg. Brackets, small ground, ask aggers.

It is very small ground. But it was a second team game, and that kind of throw was unexpected. As I left the crease, crestfallen, the umpire, one of our players, indicated it as no shot had been played, was a dead ball, but I was still out. Was that correct?

So he must have struck the pad playing no shot, gone down to fine leg, they've run, he's been run out by a direct hit, and then the umpire says it's a dead ball for playing no shot. Did he signal dead balls straight away? Well, it doesn't sound like it. He needs to explain that a bit more because he's catching me out here. I don't know the answer.

Well, phrases. Oh, sorry. As I left the crease, crestfallen, the umpire brackets, one of our players, closed brackets, indicated as no shot had been played.

So as he's back. So as he left, yeah. Does it say that? Or are you guessing that because you're backing up one of your team, it makes it your club.

I think it sounds to me like one of his own players is not normally an umpire has got the dead ball shout a bit late. Very late. Yeah. And so the run has happened. He's been running.

then he signals dead ball so if he'd have brought him back what sort of actions would have been in the bar that evening offered it's a very friendly club is it for park yes it would be posh as well vic well let me be in the pub in offered afterwards talking about it in gentleman in fashion but i mean if he called it late if if he's if it's all happened and then suddenly the umpire goes oh that's a that's a dead ball because he can play a shot is it too late can you be run out of a dead ball yeah that's the question but i think you can yeah yeah but he don't he needs to tell him next time what's his name Simon just to put everything in there.

A bit more detail, Simon. Nice, definitely not. I've got a very short question here from Andy and Taunton. At what point does a stumping become a runout, he asks. And I suppose he might have been thinking of that famous Beirstow dismissal, which was... Was he attempting a run? Well, is he? What was he best?

What was Johnny doing? He wasn't attempting a run. He thought it was the end of the Over. He went guard, no. He went where? He was the end of the over? or he had to be properly called and he went gardening.

There was two in a week. There was one at Hove where Shea Hope was playing for Yorkshire and the Sussex coaching contingent noticed that every time he played the shot

he just walked down the pitch. So he instructed the stumper which I believe was a boy called Ollie Carter to do a bit of ten-pin bowling and he did and surprisingly for Ollie he hit the stumps

and he's out of his crease and he's out of his crease but they gave it not out because he was an attempt in a run and they warned him not to do it again. Birsto was not attempting a run, no. Do you not, no, he couldn't have been.

He was, he was over. How was he given out? How was he given out? Stumped. Wasn't he? I think it was stumped, yes. Okay. I wonder whether you'd have handled that

in any different way if you've been out there, I don't know. In international cricket, it was a lot easier. Yeah. It was a bit different. Well, I felt, sorry, sorry, for the third umpire in that because they immediately threw the onus onto the third umpire

to make a decision yeah and i guess the third umpire had no choice because it was a line decision yeah and he was just giving the line decision yeah but the modern-day cricket and it just didn't happen in that series i don't know why if you watch today now if a battle wants to go down and do some gardening or whatever he will look to square leg and go to the umpire so the the ball's dead. Yeah, can I go? Yeah. And if the umpire says, yes, off you go.

But they won't move. He'll be safe then. Yeah, he's safe. That's interesting, because he used to ask the keeper, didn't you look right? Yeah, right. Yeah, not these days. I don't think you ask a player anymore. No, I don't you do.

That's what tends to happen now. Right. Is that they will look directly at square leg without moving. Yeah. And they'll be more wary of doing that post, that best. The two happened in two weeks were, you know, I hadn't seen anything like that. in your tour really? Well, I do say there was one guy

that played for Leicester. Oh, yeah, but he used to get up your nose. Do you remember him? Yeah. He's still unpolar. Name that man. Roger Cholchard. Oh, yes, Roger.

He took his glove off and hurled it at you. And nine times out of ten, he missed you in the back of the car. And he wouldn't apologize. He could wind up the opposition a bit, Tolly. What? There's he could. He was quite good than that.

Yeah, he was very good. Good cricket. Oh, yes, he was. Yeah. The TMS podcast from BBC Radio 5 Live. Growing businesses deal with the same problem. Too many tools, too much back and forth and not enough time. Odu helps bring it all together.

It's an all-in-one business management platform, fully integrated from sales and accounting to inventory and marketing, so your team can spend less time chasing information and focus on growth. Whether you're in retail, manufacturing or service, Odu gives you one place to manage your business. Visit Odu.com to book a demo. It's ODbO.com. Get more with BBC Podcasts, wherever you listen.

Be the first to listen to your favorite shows, like evil genius, good, bad billionaire, and You're Dead to Me, with a subscription to BBC Podcasts Premium on Apple Podcasts. You can also enjoy a range of our podcasts ad-free with an Amazon music subscription. Right. Tom Mortimer, who's a secretary of Bad Red Shot League Cricket Club. This is, I'm going to try and condense this. It's quite a long one, but basically a bowler halfway through and over, and having bowled so far right arm over tells the umpire is going to change to left arm round.

The fast bowler walks back to his mark, exchanges a few words about the field setting with the captain during which time the umpire calls to the striker, he's going to come round to you. And the striker asks a new guard, middle and leg. The bowler then bowls left, left, arm round as he said he was going to do and the bowler is bowled off stump so the batsman's bowled off stump the batsman protests that the umpah told him he were bowling right arm round but the bowler repeats his earlier statement to the umpire that actually he's going to bowl left arm round so the umpire got it wrong the umpire gave bad information the wrong information to the banser he didn't say he's going to come left arm round he just said he's coming round is he out i would put that down to misinformation

dead ball yeah I would actually your sensible way of I think yeah tactfully I think the great skills of umpires in my book

are diffusing situations and that could have been nasty yes and it's his mistake or her mistake you know the end of it mistake by an umpire

yeah we've made it just made a mistake but yeah I don't think I've done out came like that it's a good yeah very good yeah

you're a bit like your predecessor who's who who if in trouble said dead ball John Holder did old John you never get through a match with John there were so many dead balls of it yeah but there's a boy at Glamorgan didn't there Kellerway

yeah he did it and he forgot to tell the umpire he ran it in the non-striker because his non-strikeer because his non-strike was still standing there but that's where it can you have to be very careful and very diplomatic

and to be the old-fashioned umpire used to put their arm up left arm, right arm. Well, they did, didn't they? Yeah, but don't now. No, but you're right, they did. That would avoid all the confusion. I remember we were talking about him earlier on,

Murph Hughes, telling me what, at Murph Hughes? My kitchen. Imagine Murph Hughes, umpouring. Well, we found it hard to imagine you umpiring, but you're getting to get the hang of it. Fair comic thing. But what if you should say, just tell them. And then there's no issues. Yeah.

There was no issues. And in those days that, if you got it wrong then, you know, You had the David Constance, the Mervis, brilliant umpike. Absolutely super. Kenny Palmer. That's all Gary today actually. Oh, and they used to climb into it, do it properly. Because some bowler though, bowling right arm fast and left arm fast.

He is a proper bowler, and he can't be out of here. I'll have one of those. It's Troy Coley not been watching him. What, who he was. Victor. Okay, this is from Robin Clark in Worcestershire. The bowler bowls, the bat-bats, the ball heads towards the boundary and the fielder races after it. Then a lot happens.

The fielder's sun hat falls off. The fielder reaches the ball, flicks it behind him, saves the boundary, but the ball hits the sun hat. The fielder catches up with the ball, throws it to the stumps, and the batter is run out by the nearest of margins. The batter is incensed? Because he's claiming, is it five runs, or would the batter, should the batter not have been run out if the sun hat hadn't sort of blocked the ball or hadn't hit the sun hat? Did he intentionally throw the hat at the ball? No, no, no, because the sun hat is on the ground. Just lying there, lying there doing that.

As I see it, and then he's flicked the ball back, and it's hit the sun hat lying on the turf. Yeah. So can play continue, or is... I don't think so. It's a bit like there's a game two weeks ago where someone keep a run after the ball, went down at a fine leg, and he threw his glove on the floor, and then he hurtled it in and hit his glove. Yeah.

Five penalty runs. All right. I have an illustration of this, have you? Leschier versus Kent, I bowled a ball to Graham Cowdery, turned it to square leg, no run. He just stands there, does a bit of guarding. Square leg throws the ball to Winston Benjamin at mid-on, who took his cap off, caught the ball in his cap, and then threw it on to me. Five runs, five runs. Must have been Don Ozzy.

It was Don Ozzy. Peter Willi at Gully said quite a lot and ended up, I think, being suspended for a match. Don brought that upon him, didn't he? They did. Wherever Don was, it's always something. So I'd go five penalty runs. Okay. Okay.

Now, this is actually a good one. That was quite. This is Justin from Chislehurst is watching a game. So down to the blue, the umpah called no ball and clarified that it was for throwing. Massive row. Everyone, you know, I mean, it's a bad thing, is it, to be called for throwing. And all that Justin really else is, what's the correct way of handling a bowler who is? throwing. Do you call no ball?

Is the bowler banned from bowling? Do both umpires have to agree? Should there be a warning? Now I think I'm right saying in test cricket now. It's kind of a process takes place, isn't there? Because who's the fellow that's a Sri Lankan fellow? Came on here and just chucked it? Sennaica.

That's right, he just threw it. I was standing next to him when he was doing that. Right. And if you remember rightly, he then went to Birmingham and run out, Josh Butler. Josh Butler. Backing up, Mancadded him. That's correct.

While under review, as it were, you have to go to a review centre. So there's one in Loughborough, one in Perth, I believe, and one somewhere else in New Zealand. Where they film you. They film you. One of the thing I was called Pereira, I think,

is left arm over the wicket. Left, and he bowled from that far end. He'd go, whoa, hang on a minute. But they didn't call him because the procedure at the time was... You don't call. It's just two. But if this is a club game,

and you haven't got processes and throwing centres and what do you do? If you're a to dump-iron a club game and someone's running up and chucking it, what do you do? You get with your partner after the game and you report it. And you report him.

You don't do it during the game. I think that's politically incorrect. Is it? You could make, the problem is it will come from the opposition straight away. It'll come, he's throwing it. She's right, whatever.

They're throwing it. You can't prove it. Because sometimes I thought one bowl and one year threw it. well chucked it whatever word in canter cricket and he got reviewed I was three degrees out

they sung well them three I'm telling you now I was so wrong 15 degrees I was so wrong you know we all in the era and we still got sweaty palms about it always talked about Sylvester Clark

yes absolutely never once after being filmed did he have a problem don't we only bowl three mile an hour in the filming process I've watched Matsmartar Marithrin bowling on the nursery ground with his arm and a brace.

Yeah. And he still looked like he's throwing it. Yeah. It's a very, you've got to be very clever, very cute with this one and I think you hand it over to the authorities. And some of the leagues actually go about until you get filmed or someone comes to assess you. Yeah. Because sometimes people can do it by mistake, by overstretching. The front foot, you know, well, you know more about it than I'll never know. But your front foot gets too long on you. And you end up getting. low and it jars down and it doesn't look nice but sometimes not looking nice it's still okay it's still okay and that's where you can easily jump in and then you're going to cause absolutely you just call me a cheap yeah it's not pleasant it's not a pleasant conversation again we're at that diplomatic bit that yeah that's why i was so good jonathan well it was why you were good because it's worth

mentioning you know your record the biggest fixture in a way the most sort of one that could cause flames to fire all over the place was India Pakistan and how many times did you do it 14 you were the you were the ICC umpire so who's India Pakistan oh well gonna have to have that one and you ended up with quite a good rapport with those two teams didn't you the teams I had one incident in uh I think it was oh god Mahalie or something like that where that charman coach of india now gambia yeah yeah it was a bit feisty they're very feisty and And, oh, what is his name? Anyway, we'll get to it.

But anyway, they run down the wicket and they run into each other. Yeah. And it was not pleasant. She had a 3D. Just thought of him. Yeah, yeah. Got it once. That's your accommodation.

Yeah. Got in the middle of both of them. Yeah. Because my square leg partner didn't see what was going on, Asher Shorima from India. Just didn't spot it. No. He didn't spot it.

Anyway, next board is knocked a fine leg. Gambia sets off a 3D stand still. Bang. the next thing I look up Fridi has got Gambia's visor and he's shaking his head and this was my first overseas trip to do India

and Pakistan and now I've witnessed this in the 12th over I go to my partner who is inadvertently not watching he's facing talking to his wife in the crowd I think at the state so we had to deal with that

but I never honestly the biggest is with all of it was the crowds. Yeah, yeah. Champions Trophy game, I did it with Richard Kettlebrough, who now is taken over my mantle. Oh, he's all over it. He's not penciled in, he's got ink.

I looked at him just before the second ball was bow and I radioed him and went, have a look. And there was the bank over the far side, is it what they call it, Holley's stand or whatever it's called? Bermium. There was three on each seat. So they said there was 23,000. There was actually six.

69,000 in there. And he looked around and he said it was the first time he felt nervous. But now you don't, the thing is that you know yourself when you're playing, you don't, there's nothing you hear because it, when the bowler's running in, everything is silent. Yeah. It's dead silent until they hit it and it'll miss it. Yeah. And then it's carnage and you just pray it doesn't hit the pad. Just pray.

But you did have that knack that Dickie had actually. Yeah, he was brilliant. diffusing a city. I mean, Dickie made people laugh inadvertently it seemed at the time. But you had that, and somehow getting alongside them and getting to know them a little bit, I guess. Yeah, that's the big thing. Before games, we always went to games four days before, get in the nets with them, introduce yourself so they got to know you. On the field, don't just put your head down. Have a chat. Just talk to them. If they want to talk, there's a lot of people don't want to talk.

Never speak of work at Graham Smith when he was being. All my life. Really gave me the biggest stare in history. When you started a conversation. All right, Graham, how are you doing, mate? Everything, all right. There's this six-foot-six inch, a monster of a bloke just glaring at me. I went, all right, then we'll leave it there. But most people, most of the players would have appreciated having,

you getting to know you a bit. And that helped in diffusing those situations. But just chat to people. You know, there's a little lad standing out there now, Rob Wyatt, who's just starting his international career this week, next week. he's very good at it. He'll talk, but he knows when to talk. That's good.

No, he's going to be very good. Almost into that. Trevor Hobday from Clitherow in Lancashire says, at what point would an umpire become involved if the fielding side engaged in a necessary sledging? And what sanctions have you got available if it continues? That's another, that's a skill again. I watched it last week with Russell Warren and Jack Shantry in a very feisty, Johnny Berstow and Ben Brown.

Hampshire, both will keepers standing up the stumps. Soon as Johnny went to put his helmet on, Russ Warren, who was at Square Leg, walked in to about five meters away from him and went, I'm here. Okay. I can hear everything. Okay. But what I tended to do is if the chatter was as a bowler was running up, I'd stop the game.

Yeah. Stop the game, get the captain over whoever, and just give a friendly warning. You don't, just be careful. because sometimes people talk because they're very, very nervous like me right at this minute. But they do, they just, you know, you go and watch games and you sit on the sideline and go, why has he clapped his hands and shouted? Why? Because if you did that, going back to Merv and Connie, they would just say, excuse me, quiet.

And you would. Oh, dear, you wouldn't follow it on, Johnny. Stefan, I played in a game with a tree inside the boundary. The local ruled is four when you hit the tree like Canterbury. The fielder retrieved the ball, the bats and ran two. When he threw it though, the ball brushed the branches. The unpassed signalled four. Is that right?

Or should it have been six, two plus the four for throwing the ball into the tree? Or do you ignore the fact that the fielder actually threw the ball into the tree? God. Did you say it hit, as it was hit and then hit the tree? No, it was, well, it didn't hit the tree where the batsman hit it. Right, it's gone past the tree. Gone past the tree where the field had threw it in and went through the tree. Touch the tree, touch the branches.

Canterbury, you know, Canterbury. It could have happened in the old Canterbury. Yeah, no, I never saw that happen. Well, I never actually saw that happen, but it could have. No, I just can't believe that someone can be foolish enough to throw into a tree. That's a fair comment, but if you did throw it to the tree. Well, he should be putting the second team next week. You've got to get the runs, yeah.

Yeah, no, I'd go just to a mistake. Didn't see it, didn't see it at the tree. Okay. Mark Suster says many years ago, I told my son playing Coles cricket, if the bales were off and he wanted to run the batsman out, he'd have to have the ball in hand and pull out the stump. And inevitably one day he did this. Batsman was out of his ground. The umpard gave it not out.

When I queried with him later, he said that the ball and stump need to be on the same hand. My son has never forgiven me. Was the umpire correct? How can you get a stump and a ball in the same man? You're Kenny Evering gloves on? Well, I'm just telling you what happened. So the answer is... Stump?

Ball. You can use both hands. Yeah, just smack it with a stump or... It's very difficult to do it with one hand. I might have got that one right. I think you probably did, go out. I wonder if you'll get this one right. It's probably our last one.

The umpires are coming out. We haven't, we've never had this one. This is to do with the impact of earthquakes on play. Say, Sarts Jacob, that the Batson plays the ball to mid-on, runs a single, and attempts to run back for a risky two, leaving him short of his ground. The fielder makes a limp throw. The ball's dribbling onto the stumps at the strikers end, but at that very moment that it makes contact, there's an earthquake,

and the bails come off simultaneously at both ends. Given the slow pace of the ball as it hits the stumps, it's impossible to tell whether the ball or the earthquake caused the bails to be removed. I'd appreciate a response on this pressing issue because cricket must prepare itself for this inevitable eventuality, writes Jacob. Oh, good afternoon, Jacob. Are you any near St John's Wood?

I think you and I need to go for a drink somewhere, yeah. I can't answer. I cannot answer that. It's just, I think it's fantastic. I don't know. Jacob, was he sitting at home all afternoon thinking? He is. I think it's the first time I've done this.

There's been no beards involved. No. I know I had it last time. Oh, did you? Oh, right. Oh, don't worry about that. And I walked into my local pub after Vick. And there's a guy with the longest beer in history.

Is that out, Gunner? But where is Keith Flet? He hasn't appeared for this one. But thank you to everybody for writing it. Gunner, I always love her to see you. Thank you so much indeed. Yeah, I think you've passed. Oh, definitely.

You're listening to the TMS podcast from BBC Radio 5 Live. What's that saying about not letting the truth get in a way of a good story? Well, I'm Correll Prince and I'm in the way. Online I catch out some of the biggest names in football holding their tall tails to account but now the tables have turned. Can I spot the truth from the lies

as those same guys who I try to catch try and catch me out? Roll the tapes. I'm Coral Prince, lie detector on the Football Daily podcast. Listen on BBC Sound. Get more with BBC podcasts wherever you listen.

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