The Blindboy Podcast - Cistercian Perfume

Episode Date: April 3, 2019

How Paris causes psychosis in certain people from Japan. Chats about meditation, and a full guided meditation at the end Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Drape the gate like braces around your jaded faces, you basehead casements. Fuck off. It's the Blind Boy Podcast, and you're very welcome. I am currently on a live podcast tour. So, before we continue, just a couple of quick dates for April. Right, this Friday, the 5th, I am in in Nace in the Moth Theatre interviewing Colm O'Gorman who is

the head of Amnesty International in Ireland and he's a sound bastard I spoke with Colm before backstage at Electric Picnic Una Mullally came over to interview us very briefly together we had a quick conversation for like 10 minutes but

we were absolutely we really clicked do you know we really clicked and i could see by the by 10 minutes into it colin was getting emotional such was the clicking we did and then it was all gone because i had to go on stage so i'm looking forward to interviewing colin mcgarman he's an interesting character sixth and seventh vicar street in dublin um as part of uh I think it's Music Town it's called or something, so on both nights I will be interviewing guests that are related to music, on Saturday, I've got a fucking lovely line up lads, I wanted to pick just some Irish musical acts who I think, who I i enjoy who i personally enjoy at the moment

who i think are making good music so i've got a little panel of artists who i'll be interviewing and having crack with and it's going to be quiva from wyvern lingo junior brother and keen kavana and Keane Kavanagh from Softboy Records, which is, Keane and Kojak founded Softboy, they're a very exciting kind of label and movement in Ireland at the moment, Kojak was supposed to come on, but he's over in London, getting his pubes pixelated in Dalston, then Sunday the 7th of April 2019,

I've got a very special surprise guest, who I'm not going to fucking fucking tell you about so there's some tickets left for all of those nights really they're almost nearly sold out but you can still

get tickets then on the 12th Quitlahall Belfast Belfast yeah fuck it I'm gonna call it Belfast now

fuck Belfast Belfast like Derry Londonderry so I'm in Belfast on the 12th of April and I don't know who I'm interviewing there and then I'm down in Cork in the Opera House

on the 27th of April don't know who I'm interviewing there alright so come along to them, it'll be good crack please oh yes and of course the morning of the 6th of April 2019, tickets for the live podcasts in Toronto and Vancouver

go on sale, they're gonna sell out, I would imagine, within an hour, because, I don't think the venues are huge, I think there's only like 200, uh, they're like 200 seater venues, so they're gonna sell fast, so, get online the morning of the 6th of April, probably Canadian time, so get online the morning of the 6th of April probably Canadian time whenever their morning is oh fuck sure Vancouver and Toronto Jesus Christ that's too much for my head anyway

I don't know keep an eye on the internet I don't know I don't even know what fucking venues I'm playing in alright Jesus I'm shit at promoting gigs alright so yeah promoters

did you hear that did you hear that that's the sound of me fulfilling my contractual obligations okay I advertise the gig at the front of the podcast you cunts

moving on so it's it's the 2nd of April the clocks went forward there at the weekend which was greatly confusing for me i hate when fucking daylight savings happens um because i just i just can't make sense of it i can't make sense of whether i lose sleep or gain it because as i said last week i'm just shit with numbers and time and readings and things like that and time and readings and things like that but yeah so the evenings are longer that for me officially means the end of winter you know um so i got cocky this morning i got cocky

and i wanted to go for a lovely big long run before i got writing the deadline for my second book of short stories is looming so i'm writing feverishly every day several thousand words but before i do that i have to either go for a 10 kilometer run or go to the gym to lift weights just just because that type of shit you start your day like that with all those endorphins releasing around your body, it gives you energy. It gives you physical and mental energy and a vibe of positivity. So that's the first thing I do in the morning and then I sit down to write. So this morning, I open the door and it's fucking gorgeous.

Absolutely gorgeous. The sun is belting down. It's not warm. You know, it's cold. But you know when it's cold, but the sun is out. So the promise of its rays on your back will actually keep you warm. Even though the temperature isn't that actually warm. So I said, fuck it, man. I'm going out, t-shirt and shorts

and I'm going for a big long run down by the river so I did and then I'm about 20 minutes into it with this lovely lovely sun and out of fucking nowhere right I'm talking within within the space of a minute of a hat and a half the sky turns black and there's this roaring gale and it starts snowing or sleet do you know what I think it was sleet sleet is like

a strange little snow hailstone rain hybrid that cuts your face like razor blades so I was there in my fucking t-shirt, about 5k into the run, no point going back, so you just run through it, you know, getting battered with this wet sleet, now I fucking hate that, because what can happen is, if you run a 10k, and you've a t-shirt that's wet, hardens your nipples and you can end up with

bleeding nipples which is a very unpleasant side effect of uh running for long distances so i'm getting battered the fuck by this unpleasant sideways rain which lasts about 10 minutes. And then it's sunny again. Then it's so fucking sunny. And calm. That the sun. Dries my soaking t-shirt. Then I get in home. Have a shower. Come out of the shower.

Look out the window. And even stronger gale. With heavy heavy rain this time. And I just couldn't believe it I was like this is what type of madness is going on with this weather what why how can the weather switch from such dichotomous extremes in such a short amount of time and then I remembered, it's the first three days of April, and my ma always told me that at any time it was shitty in the first three days of April with the weather, my ma would tell me this story.

It's an old Irish legend, like years and years old, an old mythology, and it's called An Bó Réabach which is Irish for the Brindle Cow and Brindle is a fur pattern Brindle is like it's like a chestnut brown that has black

patches on it or streaky patches you'd see the odd. If you see a pit bull. Pit bull terrier. Brown pit bull terriers. That are kind of chestnut. And have kind of black stripes.

That's a brindle pattern. And a brindle colour. So this old Irish legend. Called the brindle cow. On Bo Ríofach. Which addresses the insanity. Of the first three days of April and it's a beautiful story it's it's encapsulates perfectly the fantastic humor and surreal irrationality of the Irish

psyche you know which which I think has to be influenced by the weather. I mean, Irish culture and, you know, how we speak and our literature, you know, from Flann O'Brien right back to the time, or even James Joyce, there's a real playful, humorous irrationality and surreality to our kind of culture and anyway this story it's about it's about this brindled brown patterned cow who is they have a bed the weather in March is kind of cuz March is shitty you know so the cow is, the weather in March is kind of, because March is shitty, you know, so the cow is like, the weather in March is shit, and raining and cold all the time,

and the cow's out in the field putting up with it, you know, going, fuck this March weather anyway, you know, it's grand, I'll deal with it, and then March ends, and as soon as March ends, the cow, and as soon as March ends the cow she gets cocky about March she goes fuck March with it's shit weather I put up with 28 fucking days of that shit

month with it's cold wind and it's wet well fuck March, March can go fuck itself but the cow is all cocky you know she's all cocky about March because she has the safety of April and she has the confidence and knowledge that April will be mild. So she's no hassle bad-mouthing March.

So then March, the month, the unit of time, gets pissed off with the talking cow. And March says, well, fuck that cow. Who the fuck is that cow to be talking shit about me from April you think you're hard do you over in April talking shit about me well fuck you

so March decides that it's gonna jump ahead in time and March asks April can I borrow a couple of days so then April says to March come on so March I'll give you the you can have the first three days of my month for the crack

because to be honest with you I don't like the way that cow is talking shit either I think that cow is being cocky and they're they're hiding behind me that cow is hiding behind me April so do you know what March I'm going to give you the first three days and you can get a bit of revenge

so March gets revenge on the cow by borrowing the first three days of April so what ensues from April 1st is this incredibly erratic violent weather

of in particular very very strong cold wet winds and on the first day of April the winds knocked the cow over and she's like begging for mercy

going alright March I'm sorry I'm sorry chill out March is like fuck you bitch not a hope then the second day of April March is going out, March is like fuck you bitch, not a hope then the second day of April March is going nuts and March is like I'm gonna kill ya, so the cow dies on the second day of April

and then on the third day of April the wind of March is so extreme and cold that it strips the flesh off the cow all her fur her brindle fur and her flesh flies into the fucking universe and and it bleaches her bones and then after the third day of april march marches like grand all right i'll talk to you next year april thanks for that and then April continues on all calm as the dead cow bleaches in a field and isn't that just

fucking beautiful isn't that just gorgeous and it's like it's mad because I think my ma used to say that to me all the time the first three days of april are shit and it's true and it's obviously some weird fucking pattern that's been going on for ages in the weather and some person a thousand years ago with way too much time on their hands it's just like yeah that's why it happens it's a conversation between two months because they're pissed off what a cocky cow and I was that cow today when I went out for that run I opened up the door

and I said it's sunny and decided I'm going to go in shorts and a fucking t-shirt and then arrived home with my fucking nipples nearly bleeding I was that cow it was beautiful

it was beautiful to be a part of that cosmic act of theatre I suppose you'd call it, you know. It made me smile but I do have sore nipples. So fuck it. I despise my nipples.

I have unnecessarily large brown areolas and I wouldn't mind them getting bleached by the first three days of April to tell you the truth. Very foolish looking chest I have. Write that on my gravestone. I don't really have any specific hot takes this week I don't think.

Last week was boiling hot. Last week's podcast was about the impact of the music of the Beach Boys on Nirvana and I fucking loved doing it I loved it, it was a very intense experience, I love doing podcasts

where I can speak in a very concentrated, passionate way about something I really care about but yeah the thing with hot takes

hot takes take a lot of energy so I don't like I can't rely upon a biting hot take every week or else I'd be spoofing so this week's one

I think I'm gonna ramble I'm gonna ramble and see what it takes me do you know might do it takes me do you know might do a bit of do you know what I haven't done in fucking ages as well I do it in a while and there's been a lot of people asking for it

I haven't read out Donald Trump's tweets as my drunk limerick aunt in a long time I haven't done that in maybe I'd say 15 podcasts possibly so we'll do a small bit of that

but speaking of politicians tweets Brexit has gone on at the moment you know which is I don't know what's fucking happening with Brexit listen, I'm looking at the news every hour and I can't tell what's fucking happening with Brexit. Listen, I'm looking at the news every hour and I can't tell what's happening with Brexit.

It's insanity. So I'm just kind of chilling out. I'm just kind of backing off from it. But one thing that, I don't know, struck me today as interesting was Emmanuel Macron, who is either president or prime minister of France. President, I think.

So Emmanuel Macron, within the flurry of this Brexit madness, publicly declares a very strong statement, a very definite and strong statement for a politician to make. And the thing is, politicians generally don't make really strong statements. And when they do, it's hard to take it at face value. It's like there has to be an ulterior motive. So Macron says, France will never let Ireland down.

Cran says, France will never let Ireland down. Okay? In reference to, you know, the bullshit that Brexit means for Ireland. Brexit essentially violates the Good Friday Agreement. We're very concerned here about the return of a hard border in the north of Ireland. Very concerned about it because nobody wants that. What people want is fucking a united Ireland to be honest. That's the word on the street. That's what most people that I know want.

A fucking united Ireland. And for the Brits to just get the fuck out. Completely. Of the country. But a hard border is something nobody wants. Because. Just fuck that. I don't even have to explain why.

I do. I remember. Very young. Like I was about fucking nine. But I do remember going up. To the north when I was about nine. And being in the back of the car. And just seeing a British soldier just.

Pointing a gun in my dad's face not necessarily aggressively not like I'm going to shoot you but just and I suppose it's pure southern privilege on my part because you know for people living up north that was their fucking lives

but for me as a tourist going up north as a kid it's like you've got this life down in Limerick where there's no soldiers. And then you go to the north of Ireland and you go to this checkpoint and all of a sudden there's this young soldier with a huge machine gun. And he's talking to my dad and he's pointing the gun at my dad's face. It wasn't resting by his side, it's like holding it, and I'm pointing this at your face,

or a fucking machine gun, not necessarily as an act of aggression, but just, that's how it was, if you move one inch, I'm legally allowed to murder you, and your family, that's what I'll do,

if I think that you're going to drive ahead, so that was fucking awful, and it stuck with me as a kid, as being very traumatising and frightening, and something I never ever wanted to see, for the people of Belfast and the people of Derry, that was their fucking daily lives, okay, so no one wants a return to that, no one wants the RA back, no one wants the fucking to that, no one wants the RA back, no one wants the fucking UVF, no one wants conflict, so Macron says France will never let Ireland down, so basically on the surface what he's saying is, whatever bullshit England are going to pull with this Brexit stuff, the EU will 100% back Ireland and favour Ireland

as because Ireland is a member state. That's what he's saying on the surface. What I didn't like about the comment, right, it's obviously it's well-intentioned on the surface. What I didn't like about it is that I don't believe Macron when he says France will never let Ireland down. I don't believe he's making that statement for a love of Ireland, for a solidarity with Ireland. I think he's playing colonial tennis, which is this weird thing that former colonial powers do. When Macron says France will never let Ireland down all he's doing is taking a dig at England he's jabbing England

or Britain and it's this weird thing when I speak to my British pals about you know what the fuck did you actually learn in school I say to them did you learn about the horrors and murder

that went on with British colonialism did you learn about the horrors and murder that went on with British colonialism? Did you learn about that? And most of my British pals say, not really, no. We learned a little bit about colonialism, but in general, the gist of what we learned was how the Spanish were really bad and how the French were terrible at colonialism and they were really nasty. And the British are good because the British ended slavery. Even though they invented it. The modern you know.

Well I won't say the British invented it. But they. The Portuguese were probably the first to do the. African slave trade. But the Brits really fucking. They really turned it into an industry. But that's what my British mates say. We learned about how the French were bad.

And how the Spanish were bad. And how Britain ended slavery. And Britain's colonialism was good. Which it wasn't fucked at. So that's what Macron is doing. He's taking pot shots at Britain. It's an old colonial game. Do you know?

And. The reason I think that is just. like, Macron has defended the French colonialism in Africa. What's going on in the country at the moment with the Yellow Jacket protests and police brutality, he's a centrist right-winger, do you know? So I don't believe him. I don't believe it's like all of a sudden he's got love and compassion for Ireland. It's a desire to take a jab at England. To old colonial enemy. Playing out those old politics. With us being used as a tennis ball essentially.

And of course then a desire to. I mean from the EU's perspective they have to make sure that when Britain leaves that no other country looks at Britain and goes fuck it they got a pretty good deal so it's in the interest of the EU to be harsh on Britain so that no one else thinks of leaving

but yeah the the colonial tennis match that I'm talking about there with Ireland as the ball this bizarre competition that former empires engage in with each other reminded me of

Roger Casement and Casement. And. Casement. I think he was given a knighthood for it. I think that's why he got a knighthood. Roger Casement was an Irish revolutionary. He participated.

He tried to smuggle guns in for the 1916 rising. And he was executed. A proud Irish revolutionary. But. Casement also. Worked for the Brits. He was a British diplomat he was knighted he's considered the father of human rights

you know but what Casement basically did his big thing that he did for the Brits is the Belgians who were a very small nation but also a colonial power the Belgians who are a very small nation but also a colonial power the Belgians were with King Leopold specifically the king of Belgium had kind of declared the Congo the Congo was the

Congo in Africa was called Leopoldville and it was like his own little personal state it's like it wasn't even yes it was colonized by belgium but it was like an area that actually belonged to leopold himself like his own little personal experiment and king leopold was committing unbelievable atrocities and slavery in the congo um mass murder chopping fucking limbs off, enforced slavery, disgusting shit. So Casement came out with this thing called the Casement Report, I believe, which basically detailed the huge amounts of crimes and inhumanity that was being committed in the Congo at the hands of Leopold and Belgium and the British powers

celebrated this massively they celebrated Casement as a hero for uncovering this but you know do you think the British Empire all of a sudden

gave a shit about fucking Africans in the Congo you know considering what they would have been doing in Nigeria at the time or what they were doing in India or what they were doing in Ireland so why all of a sudden does the British Empire give a shit about fucking human rights and it's like they don't. First off they were bolstering this, oh we're the British, we stopped slavery business, so now we're going to stop it in the Congo. Mostly what they were doing look look how bad they are at colonialism they're so mean and nasty without taking into account what britain's actually doing at the exact same time in their own colonies and that's a little bit i might be reading too much into it i might be

my take might be too hot but I gotta bang it at off Macron's comment when he said France will stand by Ireland at all costs what did he say, no France will never let Ireland down fuck off spoofer

as if the French give a fuck about the Irish and I've never. I had one. I had one experience. I'm basing this on one experience that I had in France. I was in a restaurant. I was.

One of my friends got married in France about fucking. Couple of years ago. Four or five years ago. So I went over to France. And. And. France is weird, it's the only tourist place where you'll go to where, like if you speak English, they're not having it, they fucking won't have it, you go to your fucking hotel in France, and if you're speaking English, they will make you speak a little bit of French

just for the effort of it, they fucking hate it, other countries Spain don't really mind people speaking English I know the Dutch don't Barcelona in my experience the best place to get away with

speaking English is fucking Barcelona because they identify as Catalan so they don't particularly like speaking Spanish that much as well. So English is a nice compromise. I don't have any fucking European languages, so I hate it. I hate going to countries and speaking English. Mainly because I don't want them thinking that I'm a Brit or a Yank so usually what I'll do is I'll speak a small bit of Irish and then if I speak a small bit of Irish and the person doesn't understand me then they will suggest English as a compromise because English

is the language of tourism so sometimes I'll do that so that they don't think I'm a Brit or a Yank but I was in a restaurant anyway and I was confronted with just a shocking shocking amount of rudeness so the restaurant this is how class

France is I was staying in like just a regular fucking hotel and the restaurant that was in the hotel happened to just be a Michelin starred restaurant

wasn't even expensive to be honest it was just here's our hotel by the way the restaurant has a fucking Michelin star

so I went in there and I sat down and ordered whatever fucking course was there of course the menu's in French so I just ordered

whatever's there and they come down to me with a starter fucking bone marrow now I'd never seen bone marrow in my life I didn't know people eat the inside of bones hadn't a clue so they threw this fucking bone

down in the middle of the table with this weird skinny toast and knives and forks, so I'm sitting, and then this shot glass of, like a meaty gazpacho, like a meaty cold tomato soup,

I don't know what the fuck it was, so I'm sitting down there like a langer, with my bone in front of me, and I don't know what to do with it, I haven't a fucking clue what to do with it, the waiter comes over and he speaks a bit of English says is there a problem and I said look what is this and he starts chuckling and he goes oh it's bone marrow and then I say what do I do with it how do I eat

it so he shows me he fucking gets the butter knife sticks it into the bone puts it onto the toast and says there eat that which I'd never seen How the fuck am I supposed to know about bone marrow from Ireland? We don't eat the inside of bones. And then after I did it, he turned around to all the other customers and said really loudly, Irlande, which means Irish person. And then he laughed and everyone else laughed laughed and it made me feel like one of those those shitty caricatures those racist caricatures of Irish people that the Brits and the Yanks used to print you know an ape-like creature sitting on a lot of dynamite it made me feel like that and it was shit it was shit so that made me think

right well that's that's sheer and utter fucking French colonialism no different to the type of thing you might get from a posh Brit an air of superiority and all of this

because the Irish are are animals and then as I got kinda looking into it more I heard about this thing I think it's called Paris Syndrome

and it's fucking fascinating it's like a site specific form of I don't want to go so far and say psychosis but it's like a site specific mental health issue or mental illness issue that happens almost exclusively to Asian people who visit Paris.

Most specifically Japanese, but also Chinese and Korean. specifically Japanese but also Chinese and Korean and like Paris Paris is kind of fetishized a bit in Asia like in China um like one of the things in China at the moment is a huge portion of the Chinese economy for the past 20 years, I believe, is based on this giant fucking property bubble. I'm pulling this figure out of my arse. It's 90% accurate, right? But I think I heard that in the past 50 years, even less maybe, I think it might be even 30, 20 years,

China has used more concrete than the entirety of the West since the start of the Industrial Revolution. So in China, there's entire cities that are built and no one lives in there. They're being built for the sake of building, to prop up a bubble. But there is this area of China and it's creepy. It's this city or this town called Tianducheng, right? So basically the Chinese built this entire city that is literally a replica of parts of Paris. And then I think another section is like parts of London like a perfect, like a city you can live in

proper houses and it looks exactly like Paris and London to a T they've rebuilt it they have a fucking Eiffel Tower they have a replica of the Eiffel Tower and again because there's this mad property

bubble China have built too much shit so it was built as something that they'd hoped incredibly wealthy Chinese people would go and live in this fake Paris in China but that's not the case because there's too much property the people that are living there are kind of poor to middle-income people, so it's not really luxury Paris. It's like people hanging their jocks out the window in these amazing French colonial buildings. But this is, you know, it's symptomatic

of the Asian fetishization of tourism to places like Paris and London. So anyway, Paris Syndrome is this really rare psychological condition. It happens to about 50 people a year from mostly Japan when they visit Paris. And the symptoms of it are extremely high stress, but also temporary psychosis, like hallucinations, and depersonalization and derealization. Those are things that go hand in hand with... depersonalization and derealization, like, those are things that go hand in hand with, to me,

it sounds like, you know, a couple of podcasts back, I did the podcast on what it's like, to live with severe anxiety, and to repeatedly get panic attacks, and you depersonalize, and are under intense stress all the time,

it sounds like that, but anyway, Japanese people, visit fucking Paris, and end end up in this situation. Not all Japanese, like I said, 50 people a year is fuck all, considering the amount of tourism, but it's enough to merit a what the fuck.

So there's many theories behind it. We spoke in about 25 podcasts ago, or longer, more even, i'd say jesus i did an episode on collectivism within asian societies and specifically rice growing cultures japan is a society whereby it is founded upon collectivism and with collectivism people cooperate with each other and they're polite to each other and they all kind of move forward not in a selfish way not in an individualistic way but in a collective way they all cooperate and tolerate each other for a greater good of the community and in the podcast i discussed this exists most likely because

cultures that have rice as the staple food they were founded upon a culture whereby if you need to grow rice for a village everyone has to get stuck in simple as that rice is a difficult thing that requires everyone to get involved in so if everyone doesn't pull their weight with rice you starve so this results in japanese collectivism okay so france is an incredibly individualistic culture it's western as fuck it's about me me me um you know the concept of of France came up with, like, no, they didn't come up with republicanism. It's an old Roman idea, I believe. But the French Republic is full personal liberation, personal freedom, individualism. Yes, you're part of a country, but you have the right to individual self-determination.

That's the French way. but you have the right to individual self-determination. That's the French way. So when these Japanese people visit France, firstly as well, a part of it is the fetishization of Paris. It's the belief that Paris is an incredibly magical, wonderful place where the best fashion comes from and the best culture comes from. So the Japanese people, they go to Paris with an incredibly

high, unrealistic expectation of what it's going to be like. Then when they get there, the people are incredibly rude. Okay? I don't think it's xenophobic for me to say that Parisian culture is fucking rude

if you've been to Paris you know the shtick it's people are kind of rude there you know maybe maybe they're not fucking rude maybe that's just how they are in comparison to

we'll say Irish culture where we can be rude but we're also kind of, we can be nice as well. But in Paris, for as an Irish person, you go to Paris and it's like, Jesus, you're mean. So for a Japanese person, multiply that by a thousand. In Japan, where people don't even eat in public because that's considered, or you bump into someone, you apologize, all this type of stuff. That's how Japan is. So Japanese people go to Japan and a very small amount experience Paris Syndrome, which is an intense, stressful sense of fucking shock at how dirty the place is or I think handbag snatchers were given as one example um when you go into a shop like in Japan customer service is very efficient and effective

when when the customer walks in they're giving a lot of attention but when you go in France they don't give a fuck about you these are things that I read now in a study that was done about it but it's just crazy it's fucking mad the other kind of site specific psychosis that springs to mind when I was

thinking about Paris Syndrome there's Jerusalem Syndrome that's the other one which is it's not as much crack as Paris Syndrome, there's Jerusalem Syndrome, that's the other one which is it's not as much crack as Paris Syndrome because Paris Syndrome is kind of just not to be a prick but there's something

kind of funny about Paris Syndrome obviously it's not funny for the poor person experiencing it I'm sure it's incredibly painful but as an elevator pitch the idea of Japanese people going temporarily mad because they're so rude in France

that's humorous, it sounds like a joke even though I know for the people involved of course that's not humorous at all that's going to be very stressful but there's jerusalem syndrome and jerusalem syndrome that's kind of more widespread it's it's widespread enough that in jerusalem there's a specific psychiatric hospital dedicated to treating that alone because it's so common and it's something that's been happening for fucking years mostly amongst christians jerusalem obviously you know that's is it the birthplace of christ he born in palestine i don't know i'm not that up in my

christianity but christ did a lot of shit in Jerusalem. He was knocking around Jerusalem. Doing his thing. So it's a very important place. To Christians. So this thing can happen. 50 people a year. Where.

The Christian person. Will arrive in Jerusalem. And. Initially. You know. They feel. Depersonalized or not real and they'll blame it on jet lag. They'll just think they're tired. And then all of a sudden the person starts to exhibit very odd, irrational, messianic behaviour, they will start to truly believe and think that they are, if not Christ, another major figure from the Bible. Now, they're not having crack, they're not playing. It's a kind of a stressful mania where they truly lose their sense of identity and believe themselves to be a biblical figure

when they get to Jerusalem. The symptoms of it are first, overwhelming fucking anxiety because let's face it, depersonalization is no crack. Not being able to identify who you are is no crack. The... followed by a sudden urge to if you were a group of people to fuck off on your own to no longer want to be with the people that you travel to jerusalem with to go off on your own then what usually follows is an obsession with cleanliness persistent bathing

grooming, showering bizarrely one that's like really common taking all your clothes off and wearing a bed sheet so wrapping yourself in a white bed sheet and wearing that

roaring and shouting bible verses So wrapping yourself in a white bed sheet and wearing that. Roaring and shouting Bible verses. Going to a holy place with a sense of impassioned intent. And then finally, I shouldn't be laughing, I shouldn't be laughing because I'm sure it's very distressful for the people that it's happening to but delivering a sermon in the holy place that you go to and urging people to repent or whatever the fuck

and that's Jerusalem syndrome Jerusalem syndrome and I know it's it raises a chuckle let's be be fucking honest, you know, even though it shouldn't. But, like, tour guides, tour guides in Jerusalem are trained to spot when this is going to happen. If they're bringing Christians around the gaff, the tour guides are trained to spot when someone is exhibiting Jerusalem syndrome. And it's a real thing that fucking happens.

50 people a year. And there's a psychiatric ward for it. The general kind of consensus in psychology about, you know, what the fuck is the crack with Jerusalem Syndrome? You know, can Jerusalem turn a person psychotic? Because what those symptoms are really, they're the symptoms of psychosis. And the consensus tends to be

it's the people who experience Jerusalem syndrome already have a pre-existing underlying psychotic disorder or possibly a form of schizophrenia and it can be the schizophrenia in the first place that kind of urges the person to get to Jerusalem in the first place if you get me so it's it's a pre-existing condition which manifests itself as a religious desire to go to Jerusalem and then the symptoms fully present when the person reaches the apex of that journey. You know, that's the most modern reading of what it actually is. But it's been happening a long, long time.

Those are the only two I can think of I don't know how the fuck I got onto that Glasgow Syndrome Glasgow Syndrome is different it's not a site specific psychological disorder

it's it's an economic condition it's I think what it is off the top of my head. People in Glasgow. Have. Tend to die young.

There's a lot of early deaths in Glasgow. And it doesn't quite match. Other. Modern industrialized cities. That Glasgow has a unique type of. Syndrome and condition condition where people just die earlier and it baffles people they don't really know why people dying from alcoholism heart disease suicide things like that there's a definite correlation with some type of social

deprivation but at the same time they found that Glasgow isn't really like it's not necessarily any worse off than like Manchester or Sheffield or somewhere so they can't really wrap their heads around it but people die earlier in Glasgow we're 40 minutes in now so it's probably time

for another ocarina pause or something and then after the ocarina pause I'll read out a few of Trump's tweets as your drunk limerick aunt where the fuck is the ocarina right the ocarina does not appear to be at hand

the banjo's at the other side of the room where is it? yeah that's at the back of the studio and you know what I've got a nice bit of fucking flow i'm liking the ramble this week uninterrupted rambling letting my head take me what i wanted partly inspired to be honest i went back listening to bill burr i enjoyed bill burr's podcast but i hadn't listened to him in a couple of months and I listened to Bill Burr and Bill Burr's podcast was one of the inspirations for me

doing this, when I heard Bill Burr just simply, he just turns on the mic and he talks and I used to love it, I used to love the freedom of it and that inspired me, I said to myself right well if Bill Burr can sit down once a week and press record and talk then I can at least try so I went back listening to Bill Burr and it reminded me of yeah fuck it what's wrong with just having a podcast with a

long stream of conscious ramble I hadn't done one in a while so I don't have the fucking occur rate what have we got we've got that we had a lighter before and we have a weed grinder so we're gonna have i'm gonna a weed grinder pause this week for the adverts to go in let's see if this even makes noise it's a plastic, one of those shitty plastic weed grinders ok here's the the weed grinder pause

oh that's not particularly pleasurable but I'm impressed by the acoustics of it. This is where you need one of those binaural mics now, or the stereo ones. On April 5th... You must be very careful, Margaret. It's a girl. Witness the birth.

Bad things will start to happen. Evil things of evil. It's all for. Witness the birth. Bad things will start to happen. Evil things of evil. It's all for you. No, no, don't. The first omen. I believe the girl is to be the mother. Mother of what? Is the most terrifying. Six, six, six. It's the mark

of the devil. Hey! Movie of the year. It's not real. It's not real. It's not real. Who said that? The first omen. Only in theaters April 5th. Rock City, you're the best fans in the league, bar none. Tickets are on sale now for Fan Appreciation Night on Saturday, April 13th when the Toronto Rock host the Rochester Nighthawks at First Ontario Centre in Hamilton at 7.30pm. You can also lock in your playoff pack right now to guarantee the same seats

for every postseason game. And you'll only pay as we play. Come along for the ride and punch your ticket to Rock City at torontorock.com. There's the weed grinder pause, lads. That was so... If there was any digital adverts inserted... This podcast is sponsored by you, the listener. All right?

Via the Patreon page. Patreon.com forward slash TheBlindBoyPodcast. If you like the podcast, if you're coming to it every week and you enjoy it, if you're the type of person who... I don't't know if I'm providing the podcast hug as I describe it which is the gentle relaxing vibe and that little break in the day that you get out of listening to a podcast if I'm providing that for you and you're thinking

fuck it if I met Blind Boy in real life I would buy him a cup of coffee or a pint if you're of that mindset you can do that via the patreon page become a patron of the podcast please do makes a huge difference to my life the patreon is the reason that I'm back here every single fucking week doing this podcast if it wasn't for the patreon to be honest I wouldn't be doing this every week um because I'm too fucking busy right now I'm in the middle of writing my book i'm trying to do several thousand words a day i'm incredibly busy um and if i had the choice i just i just wouldn't i'd be taking a break from the podcast for a couple of months to focus 100 on the book but because i have patrons

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available on spotify if you're on spotify follow the podcast and tweet about it suggest it to a friend especially if you're not living in Ireland this podcast is growing pretty fucking exponentially internationally in really mad countries that I didn't think it was going to grow in and this is because of word of mouth

I'm going to Canada doing a lot of gigs because my Canadian listeners are telling their friends about it. And if they're in an office. They're telling their friends. I'm listening to this podcast. And that's turning into gigs.

So. Please do that. If it's not too much hassle. Tweet it. Fucking Facebook. Whatever the fuck. God bless. Alright.

It's time for the return. Of. Donald Trump. Donald Trump's's tweets being read by your drunk limerick aunt let's go for it let's see what the prick is tweeting so i'll set the scene uh it's about two in the morning you're sitting down at home you you decide you want to re-watch The Sopranos. So you flick on The fucking Sopranos. You start at episode one. You're about three episodes in.

You're fucking loving it. You're relaxed. You're like fuck me I forgot how good The Sopranos were. The lights off. Just that blue glow of the television. And then you hear the keys in the hall door and they're taking a little bit longer than usual there's a rattle to them and the hall door opens with a briskness and a slight slam you know something unbecoming for two in the morning it's your drunk limerick aunt

and she's been drinking rosé spark no sparkling rosé and buckfast that's what some of the girls in Limerick are drinking at the moment

sparkling rosé and buckfast I've heard it's nice I'm gonna have to try it so she's had a feed of sparkling rosé and buckfast at her friend Sharon's house I've heard it's nice. I'm going to have to try it. So she's had a feed. Of sparkling rosé and buckfast. At her friend Sharon's house.

And now she's back. She said a few words to the taxi driver. Now she's in the sitting room. What are you watching? That's on his plan though. I don't like him. I don't like his jowls. Don't like him at all.

I think he's a prick. the way he shouts at Carmella why does she put up with him at all why does Carmella Tony, Tony she just roars at him all the time fucking leave him girl will ya I haven't seen any Democrats down here at the board or working

with us asking us to speak to any of us they have an open invitation we're getting overrun, our facilities are over capacity we're at emergency crisis after many many years, decades Mexico is apprehending large numbers of people at the southern border mostly from Guatemala,

Honduras and El Salvador. They've all been taking US money for years and doing absolutely nothing for us, just like the Democrats in Congress. There's no amount of testimony or document production that can satisfy Jerry Nadler or Shifty Adam Schiff it is now time to focus exclusively on properly running our grey country I'm going to bed so that was the the welcome return

of your drunk limerick aunt reading out Donald Trump's tweets there you go so I want to do something new this week something I've never done before Of your drunk limerick aunt. Reading out Donald Trump's tweets. There you go. So. I want to do something new this week. Something I've never done before. Just for the crack.

So this week. I. I meditated. For the first time. In months. Okay. I. I. I don't know why I stopped meditating.

I think it's because. Just running and stuff like that. I didn't really need it. But this week. I just felt. Like I'm overwhelmed with work. To be honest. I've got a book deadline coming up I have to have my book

written by the end of May I'm writing several thousand words a day you know having to delve into the state of flow in order to do that which requires me to be quite grounded and relaxed if I'm to write and actually be creative I have to be quite grounded and relaxed and be able to have fun. But I'm also incredibly busy. Like, you know, this weekend of three fucking gigs, you know, that's tough going. A lot of preparation goes into that. I've got the podcast. I've my BBC series that's currently being edited.

I often have to do voiceover work or little bits of editing in my studio for that. So I've no fucking time from the moment I wake up in the morning to when I go to sleep at night. I am working. I love it. It's work that I fucking love doing. I'm passionate about it. It's fun. But when you're that busy, it can be very easy to, you don't notice if you're stressed at all, to be honest.

Not only do you not notice if you're stressed, I could have an injury. I could have like a sore foot or itchy palms and you don't notice it because you're so busy and so absorbed so I just got this came into my head this week I should meditate I should meditate I should meditate and be a bit more mindful so that I look after myself and that I don't what I'm trying to avoid is burnout when you're working really hard especially when it's something you love doing when I'm working on something I love doing it doesn't feel like work so I can very intensely do it from when I wake up until I go to bed I've mentioned before if I didn't have to sleep I wouldn't I get pissed off when I go to bed because it's like here's eight hours where I can't do that thing I want to do

so I just decided I'd fucking meditate a very simple mindfulness meditation where I check in with my physical body and my emotions for 10 minutes and I did it and it was fucking phenomenal it was amazing I needed it so badly and I didn't know I uncovered

feelings of frustration feelings of anger that I was having I uncovered a tension in my jaw that I wasn't aware of, a tension in my fists, the presence of underlying anger is what I uncovered from my meditation this week, I brought it into my awareness, within all my business, I'm going around the place clenching my teeth and clenching my fists

because something is making me feel angry. Probably, I'm probably angry at not being able to dedicate as much time to my book as I'd like. In a perfect world, I would just be writing my book that's all I'd be doing but the nature of the industry that I'm in where I'm essentially self-employed I'm a creative I'm an artist I know I have to strike while the fucking iron is hot so if there's gigs going I gotta take the gigs I can't be turning down gigs

um you have to take every bit of work that comes to you and work feverishly at it because in six months time that can disappear really quickly that's the nature of the fucking industry twitter could switch it could flick a switch and all of a sudden all my followers on twitter are worth nothing. And I can't put the podcast out there. I can't promote. Shit can happen overnight with my job. So I gotta work. Feverously. And intensely.

And make sure that I'm doing it. When the sun is shining. So I had a lot of anger around that. Because. There's a frustration to it. And. And unfairness. I don't want to say unfairness that's i experience it as an unfairness it's not an unfairness there's nothing unfair about there being work to be done that i can earn a living from there's nothing unfair about that but i'll

take ownership of the fact that i um experience it as an unfairness because I prefer to just be writing my book so that all came up for me during meditation and I'm so grateful and glad that it did and not only that the 10 minutes of meditation

gave me a a catharsis and a relaxation and a letting go of bodily and mental tension that i wasn't didn't know that i was carrying and it all left and i felt fucking amazing i felt more rested from 10 minutes of meditation than from any of the sleeps i've been getting recently meditation is one of the most powerful tools that is available to the human body it's it's kind of like it's not far off wanking it's it's in that territory it's like of like it's not far off wanking it's it's in that territory it's like oh my god what it's free this there's a here's a free thing that i can do and it releases all these chemicals in my brain and i don't need special equipment some people do but like i don't need special equipment and i can

just do this meditation is like that when you meditate and you can do it you're left afterwards going i can't believe this is free i can't believe i can take 10 minutes out of my day and feel like i've just taken this incredible drug and it's like you haven't you've released natural endorphins and chemicals throughout your body and it's a thing that we can switch on and it's not spiritual it's not religious it's not supernatural it's a very simple exercise in awareness and mindfulness so and it's something that i used to do it daily and then like i said i kind of i kind of stopped and that's fine there's nothing wrong with that some people do it a lot some people do it daily and then like i said i kind of i kind of stopped and that's fine there's nothing wrong with that some people do it a lot some people do it twice a day three times a day

i do it when i need it and it can be a very useful and helpful tool for your mental health processes to, it can be great to understand your emotions, to truly know what you're feeling, to be able to name it, and to be able to take ownership of it. When negative emotions like tension, anger, anxiety, exist as a hum that kind of controls us outside of our conscious awareness you can carry anger

around and anxiety around for weeks and not really know you know it's like you know but you're you can't name it you just don't feel right don't know why you just don't feel right. Don't know why, just don't feel right. Because too much energy is in the head. Continual thinking all day long. Thinking, thinking, thinking. And you're spending no time then in the body. What meditation does is it allows us to spend a little bit of time in the body. Out of the head, out of the continual non-stop thoughts. Of how busy you are.

Or the tasks you need to do. Or who you're pissed off with. All that intense head thinking. That keeps us out of our body. That keeps us not aware of. A sore foot. Or a pain in our tummy. Do you know? Med meditation allows that to happen so what i'm gonna fucking chance this week for the crack because why not i might do a little i've never done this before a short 10 minute guided meditation that if you want i'll do it at the end of the podcast you can you can do this

you can sit down with the earphones in follow my instructions and i will take you through a basic 10 minute we'll say mindfulness mindfulness meditation that hopefully will, really fucking relax you, and ultimately what I want is, what I'm really excited about is, if you've never meditated, here's your chance now, to have a crack at it,

and, for you to go, fuck me, why didn't I know about this, and then for you to become a person, who meditates, before I do it like meditation is one of these things that it gets thrown around a lot meditation and

mindfulness things that get thrown around a lot as as easy solutions for people with mental health issues i'm sure many of you have gone to a doctor with depression or anxiety only to be almost insulted by them saying to you exercise and meditate which is a it's a bullshit when someone's in crisis that's a bullshit solution exercise and meditation are essential parts of a good mental health regime that should be included but they're not really a solution to anything you know it's more complex than that i want to speak about meditation as something that you can engage with and do it's like i'm suggesting to you a nice meal or a nice restaurant you know not to cure anything another thing just to put agency into your hands

meditation isn't for everybody 99% of the time it's an intensely pleasurable brilliant, harmless thing to do a natural thing however it can in very rare situations be unpleasant for some people mainly people who may suffer what's known as body trauma okay what i mean by that is

like with meditation a lot of it is scanning and checking in with your body, different parts of your body. So if, I don't know, you were attacked at some point, if you're a victim of an assault of some description, and a traumatic emotional experience is tied up with a physical injury at a certain part of your body, some of the emotional trauma and the memories of it can store it is the wrong word but they can mentally correlate with that part of your body so some people a very small amount of people when they meditate and scan their bodies overwhelming negativity can come up that can correlate to a trauma they experienced if you've been in a car crash for instance you know and it hurts your legs or your arm or whatever car crashes are no crack they're terrifying frightening things that the brain simply goes that's too much i'm not dealing with that after the unconscious mind with you so meditation in rare situations can bring up

emotional physical trauma around a car crash if you've ever gotten an unprovoked box into the head or a headbutt you know especially if you're a lad I've received many punches into the face in my life and many headbutts

especially when I was a teenager and you're a lad so you have to take it on the chin as you say or fucking fight back but it's still frightening and it's not nice even though you can't say it out loud and you can't admit it no one likes getting a box into the fucking head

stuff like that can come up I'm not saying it will I'm just being responsible so maybe go off and do a bit of reading and end the podcast now I'm not saying it will. I'm just being responsible. So. Maybe go off and do a bit of reading. And end the podcast now. But for anyone who would like. A crack at a fucking guided meditation.

Let's go for it. Let's do it. Alright. This will be. A simple. Ten. Ten minutes. Mindfulness. And body scan meditation, a grounding

meditation, and we'll go for it I'm going to turn off the piano I'm going to turn off the piano and I'm going to go wild alright, because I'd like silence for this, you need silence for it the piano is turning off now so now you're just left with my naked

voice so what I'd like you to do if you're starting a meditation is how you sit is quite important alright you can do it lying down if you want

like if you're in hospital or or something you want to do it while lying down that's fine but i would recommend finding a comfortable upright position in a chair if you're a beginner the best place to do it is somewhere silent and private in your own home or what i like to do is to find a park bench or go somewhere near a river somewhere somewhere with a bit of nature can be really nice if you're on a walk just sit down on a log or something so now that you're sitting how we kind of start is, you know, settle yourself into a comfortable position. Your feet on the ground, most definitely.

Your arse on the seat. Your back upright. You don't necessarily have to have a back support, but it helps. And then, in your own time time just close your eyes have your eyes closed and what you begin with is what's known as as checking in with different parts of your body okay so your eyes are closed and I want you to notice just notice like the very top of your head bring your attention to the top of your head now slowly direct your attention to your shoulders

just notice that they're there notice how they feel there notice how they feel there might be a bit of tension there you're not trying to fight the tension you're not trying to get out of it you're noticing that it exists now bring your attention to your back your spine

visually now bring your attention to your back your spine visually kind of notice and feel your mind just scanning down your back all the way down now feel yourself sitting feel the weight of your body

connecting with the seat that you're sitting on notice if it's is it shifting left, is it shifting right now scan your thighs Is it shifting left? Is it shifting right? Now scan your thighs all the way up to your knees. And your hands. What are they up to? Are they in your lap?

Are they clasped together? And just are they clasped together and just bring all that attention to only your hands you don't have to move them you don't have to do anything you're just noticing how your hands are feeling are they relaxed

are they clenched what's going on with your hands and finally visually scan from your knees right down to your feet notice your feet connecting with the ground and how the weight of your body in the chair and how the connectedness with the ground underneath you how you feel present

with the earth and your feet kind of as one what I'd like you to do now is to notice your breathing. Keep your mouth closed and breathe in through your nose. The way to breathe is you want to breathe in through your nose so that if someone was sitting beside you, they would hear you breathing. And you want to breathe in in such a way that your tummy expands. Not so much your chest. You want to make sure that your belly is expanding as you breathe in.

And then getting smaller as you breathe out. Now, count your breaths. One to four breathe in slowly through the nose one breathe out breathe back in slowly through the nose two breathe out Breathe back in slowly through the nose. Two.

Breathe out. Three. And four. And five. Only focus your attention on the breaths if it helps you can imagine your breath as a light of a colour of your choosing

that travels in your nose goes all the way down to your belly expands it comes back out travels out your nose again counting one to four each time this is the only focus of your attention Don't be worried if thoughts or feelings

are coming up and trying to distract you don't fight them imagine that you're floating on a river and whatever thoughts are coming past they're just floating past you

and you notice them you allow them to exist they're just there they're passing by they're being noticed. Try and. Notice what you're feeling. What emotions are coming up for you.

Are you feeling good? Or is there maybe something there that might be annoying you a bit a bit of discomfort if that's the case you're not going to fight it you're going to notice it you're going to allow it to exist it floats past You're going to notice it. You're going to allow it to exist. Floats past.

The only thing that matters is your breathing and your breaths. and now when you're on time kind of start to bring your attention back to the room that you're in or whatever your surroundings are you know maybe listen out what noises are there your eyes are still closed but you're bringing yourself back into the world yourself back into the world, feeling your feet on the ground, your arse in the chair, open your eyes and then you can start stretching out stretch out your fucking body

your legs whatever you want how did that feel you prick was that enjoyable, you've just meditated for the first time, fair fucking play to you, if you enjoyed it,

make that a part of your daily life, you know, notice how fucking, the first time I meditated, I felt like, I felt like I'd washed my brain, that's what it felt like, I felt like I'd taken my brain out of my head and fucking washed it, if, if you did that and you found it difficult, that thoughts were flying into your head, distracted, that's grand, there's no right or wrong wrong way sometimes I meditate and it doesn't work for me don't

don't come away thinking oh I fucked that up, I did it wrong it's about there's no such, the whole point of meditation, there's no such thing as right or wrong that's why the whole time the focus is upon I use the word

notice a lot, you notice things to notice means to observe whether it be a sensation in the body an emotion a thought noticing not controlling not changing not fighting fucking noticing like you're on a river and there's leaves floating past you or tins of coke or whatever the fuck you're noticing it there's a tin of coke

you're not going fuck sake what's there a tin of coke doing in the river what prick threw that in there you're going there's a tin of coke nothing I can do about it

it's floating past that's that's how mindfulness meditation works when you get really good at that you can start bringing it into your everyday life like i said before i i might fucking wash the dishes in a mindful fashion i'll be washing the dishes noticing the suds on my hands or the smell in the air bringing that concentrated accepting mindfulness

to a daily activity as a way to reduce stress and feel fucking class and improve my mental health I was very very very strongly tempted during that to do some of it as the trout of no crack

very tempted I went to relax during that to do some of it as the Trout of Norcrack. Very tempted. I want you to relax and just imagine like, man imagine you're in Barcelona sitting on a beach drinking Stella Artois and you feel so fucking relaxed. You're not thinking once and you feel so fucking relaxed you're not thinking once about the fucking concert hall the concert hall I want to see you down man fuck em you're here to relax right

you're here to fucking relax and if you don't do it man you're getting glassed it's all about it I swear to god it's all about it alright I got that out of my system I didn't do it in the middle of the fucking meditation I hope you enjoyed that I really do if you want more

I'll do them there's not much I can fucking expand on that to be honest there isn't really that's a basic mindfulness meditation go back to it if you want if you enjoyed it once in the morning once in the evening if you like don't do

them too close to bed you'd think that that would relax you for sleep but it actually doesn't that can that stimulates the mind it doesn't prepare you for going to sleep if you do that 11 or 12 o'clock you'll most likely want to stay up it's a good morning thing it's a good evening thing and i don't know, get to the situation where you can do it. You can do that to yourself. You don't need me guiding it.

Or whatever. Whatever the fuck works for you. Yart. I'll talk to you next week. Rock City, you're the best fans in the league, bar none. Tickets are on sale now

for Fan Appreciation Night on Saturday, April 13th when the Toronto Rock hosts the Rochester Nighthawks at First Ontario Centre in Hamilton at 7.30pm. You can also lock in your playoff pack right now to guarantee the same seats for every postseason game and you'll only pay as we play. Come along for the ride and punch your ticket to Rock City at torontorock.com.