The Blindboy Podcast - New Jersey UFO's and a Medieval monastery in Offaly
Episode Date: December 18, 2024New Jersey UFO's and a Medieval monastery in Offaly Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....
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Embrace the gander at the balcony you jangly Anthony's. Welcome to the Blind
Byte podcast. You're very welcome if you're a new listener. Consider going back
to an earlier episode to familiarize yourself with the lore of this podcast.
It's almost Christmas time you glorious Yuletide cunts. Around this time when I
was, when I was a small child, in the week leading up to Christmas, maybe eight years of age, my ma
would bring me up to bed and then she'd leave and I'd pretend that I was asleep.
And the reason that I'd pretend that I was asleep is really what I was doing is I'd open
the curtains and I'd look out the window and stare up into the night sky at all the December stars.
And what I was looking for was Santa Claus going across the sky in his sleigh.
Now if you happen to be listening to this podcast with a child, some people do, I don't
know why, but if you are listening to this with a child, maybe fast forward a little
bit.
But when I was like eight, when I was 8 and
I believed in Santa Claus, that's what I'd do around this time of year. I'd go out to
the window at night time and I'd look up into the night sky, I'd look up at the stars. And
what I was scanning for were a series of lights, a series of lights, like beads, going across
the sky. I was looking for Santa and his reindeer.
I used to love resting my face against the glass of the window, and seeing the condensation of my
breath, and just the peacefulness, the peacefulness of looking up at that sky,
and truly believing, truly believing, Santa Claus is up there somewhere,
because he's getting ready for next week week when he's bringing presents to everybody.
But I also remember how calming and meditative it was to look up at the night sky, just to
stare at all the different stars, to look at the moon, to notice how large the universe
is and how small I was, and to experience, I suppose, the first thoughts
about my own existence. To think existentially. As best a little child can do. To be aware
that, you know, I am me. I am alive. I exist. I'm gonna die. The people that I love are gonna die.
I'm alive, I'm a person, I exist in reality, and the universe is huge.
I'm looking up for a sentry.
But the majesty of the night sky did that wonderful thing that it does.
It made me consider my insignificance. The night sky, it felt peaceful and it felt safe and it felt okay to look up at.
And then all of that got ruined
because of a fucking TV show called Unsolved Mysteries.
So when I was like eight,
there was this American TV show on Sky 1 called Unsolved Mysteries and it had this theme music
that was just chilling, genuinely frightening music.
And the man who presented it had a very frightening voice.
And it was a TV show about scary things.
It was a TV show about uncertainty, anxiety, mysteries, people who disappeared, murders.
And the one that really fucked me up at eight years of age.
There was an Unsolved Mysteries episode about alien abductions.
Now I'm eight.
I've never thought about aliens.
I didn't really know what aliens were.
What I certainly wasn't prepared for
was a TV show where adult Yanks,
adult Americans,
with complete straight faces are speaking about
when aliens
flew their spacecraft outside their bedroom window and then
flowed their spacecraft outside their bedroom window and then
shone a beam in the window and
abducted them and then did experiments on them. So when I was fucking eight years of age, it was around Christmas time,
the adverts came on for this TV show Unsolved Mysteries and the alien abduction episode
terrifying music, terrifying
presenter and then just these these recreations of UFOs, these spinning discs with lights on them that can shine a light into your
bedroom when you're asleep at night. The place that I felt safe, my bed, there's a
program on television telling me that aliens can fly outside my bedroom
window, shine a light in the window and then my body floats out the window and they do
experiments on me and then they showed a drawing, a drawing of an alien that a yank had described
and seeing that image, seeing that drawing of an alien with the big huge black eyes and the big
large white head and the tiny mouth, seeing that drawing on the advert for Unsolved Mysteries when
I was eight years of age, one of the most terrifying things that ever happened to me in my life.
My first experiences of panic, of terror, my first experiences of childhood depression. I went
from being a really happy little child to experiencing really great lonely feelings
of doom. I vividly remember the bit at the end of the advert where they finally show
the drawing, they show a drawing of what the alien looks like. This large white head, two big
black eyes, and a tiny little nose and a tiny mouth, and I believe wearing like a black
dressing gown, it hit me like a hammer. I remember my breath leaving my body and my
legs feeling so weak that I could faint and I lost the ability to speak
for like two hours afterwards. I just couldn't get that image of the alien out
of my fucking head and to be perfectly honest right now as a middle-aged man I
could probably go online and find that exact drawing or find that exact
unsolved mysteries episode.
And I genuinely kinda don't want to.
I'm still a bit scared.
I'm still a bit frightened, even now as an adult, just to go and find that.
Like I'd do it.
I won't do it right now.
I'm not doing it right now.
But if I was to do it, I'd need to prepare for it.
And that's not good. I need to prepare myself for a drawing of an alien.
With the scary fucking Unsolved Mysteries music over it.
That's a little bit of trauma there.
So that experience, that completely, that was the end.
That was the end of looking out my bedroom window at night time to search for Santa Claus
in the stars.
That was the fucking end of it. I started sleeping with the light on. It didn't matter how much my parents explained
to me that alien abductions weren't real, because I'm going, they are real. There's
a documentary on television, there's a documentary on television called Unsolved Mysteries, and
there's people talking about they were abducted by aliens. I think one night my parents had to
literally just go look we're going to stay up with you and all of us are going to watch
Unsolved Mysteries together. I think it was the Bigfoot episode and the problem was with
Unsolved Mysteries, you'd have like, they'd do like three or four Unsolved Mysteries an
episode so maybe two of them were legitimate murders
that had happened, or disappearances.
Actual crimes that have occurred in real life
in America that haven't been solved.
Unsolved mysteries would choose one case and recreate it.
And then at the end of the episode,
if you had any information for the unsolved mystery,
for the person who was murdered the
disappearance you could contact the show and tell him so you'd have that and then immediately afterwards
a story about a ghost or a story about bigfoot and that was that's what was so frightening for me at
eight years of age i'm trying to navigate the concrete reality of being alive and fantasy. Eight years of age was probably the last year that I'm gonna be believing in Santa Claus.
My parents aren't gonna keep that up after eight years of age.
But one of the most frightening things about this TV show Unsolved Mysteries was they would
present real things and fantasy alongside each other with the exact same scary music and
seriousness and it was all presented as real and I remember the night of sitting
down watching it with my parents because this was driving them insane as well I
wasn't fucking sleeping and my parents sitting down watching it with me and my
ma saying things like if someone was murdered on screen, my ma's there going, that's red
sauce, that's not blood, that's red sauce, and then my da going, fucking yanks, yanks,
yanks, fucking yanks.
Because my da hated Americans, and he hated America.
He was a communist, he hated America.
And he hated that there was a society that existed where this was presented as entertainment
and that you had grown adults talking about aliens and ghosts. So my dad becomes very frustrated
by the absolute silliness of this tv show Unsolved Mysteries and he's screaming they're all lunatics
they're all mad which didn't help the situation to be honest. But I became deathly afraid of alien abductions.
Terrified of being abducted by aliens.
Couldn't get the image of that drawing of the alien out of my head.
I refused to look out windows at night time.
There was no way...
The night sky went from being a wonderful, safe, curious place,
where I used to daydream, night
dream to being something I simply wouldn't look at. Instead of searching with curiosity
for Santa Claus's reindeers, I refused to look up in case I saw a UFO and then it came
down and beamed me up. and even now as a grown adult
It's the one thing that would kind of test me it'll test if I'm
If I'm in bed at night and I'm doing some reading or I'm on a little Wikipedia hole my laptop out
If I start going down a UFO rabbit hole I
Might just leave the light on I might just leave the light on. I might just leave the light on when I sleep. But something I do, something I try to examine, is seeing the UFOs and the aliens and
unsolved mysteries, it wasn't just a scary thing I saw on TV that spooked me. It was a significant
event that triggered childhood mental health issues that lasted more than a year.
And I now realize that like the UFOs and aliens, they were a way for me to understand deeper anxiety and terror.
Like the summer before, when I was seven, I'd had an operation, I had a hernia.
So when I was seven, I went onto an operating table and I went underneath anesthetic.
And I remember the feeling at seven years of age of being under anesthetic, staring
up at a light above me and the surgeon's heads blocking out the light and going all wobbly
because I'm going under anesthetic.
And that exact image was present a few months later on the alien abduction episode of Unsolved Mysteries.
When the American was describing being abducted by aliens and being brought into the spaceship,
they were put down on an operating table and experiments were conducted on them
and on TV they showed the point of view of the person looking up at the light
and the aliens heads coming over them doing the experiments on their body an
operating table. So that definitely triggered a memory of my operation and
what also used to terrify me about about alien abductions when I
was a little kid it was a sense of loneliness a sense of I'm in my bed by
myself and these aliens can just fly this UFO outside the window shining a
light and beam me out and there's nothing my parents can do to save me I
feel so alone there's nothing my ma can't to save me. I feel so alone, there's nothing.
My ma can't stop it, my da can't stop it.
This feels so lonely and frightening.
I feel abandoned.
And that was the sad feeling I used to feel in bed
when I was thinking about being abducted by aliens as a child.
It was that sadness of,
there's nothing my parents can do.
But when I was seven, getting an operation for my hernia, I wasn't really scared of the operation. I wasn't even scared that they were cutting
me open. But what I didn't like, what did upset me was when I went into the operating
theatre and they said to my ma, you can't come in. And my ma had to say to me, I can't
come in with you now. I'm not allowed in here,
you're gonna have to go with the sergeant here and they're gonna take you in. And at seven years of
age that concept was alien to me. What do you mean someone can tell my ma what to do? My ma minds me,
she protects me, that's what she does. What do you mean she's not allowed in to the operating
theater when I get my operation? You mean my ma's not gonna be here with me when someone cuts me open? And up to that point I'd been calm
but when that happened then I started to cry. Then I started to call out for my ma
but there was nothing she could do because I'm being taken into the
operating theatre and I start to feel very frightened because someone's
taking power away from my ma and then suddenly there's
a gas mask on my face and then going under, looking up at that light with the blurry black
heads above me. So looking back, that's what my alien abduction fear was. I was eight years
of age. I didn't have the emotional intelligence or language or intrapersonal intelligence
to understand the trauma of the operation.
And then a couple of months later, this TV show, Unsolved Mysteries, comes on TV and
there's these aliens that can abduct you from your bed and they put you down on an operating
table and do experiments on you.
And the aliens looked really scary. So alien abductions, that was my brain's way
of making sense and trying to understand the terror of abandonment. The terror of these
men who I don't know can tell my ma to stay outside, stay outside the room while they
put a gas mask on me and cut me open and then I wake up in a completely different room in a daze and I'm really sore and all my legs are
covered in blood. That was another theme on the Unsolved Mysteries UFO episode
was this concept of missing time that when you're abducted you don't remember
any of it and you just arrive in a different location and several
days have passed.
And that's what it felt like when I got my operation. I remember going under,
don't remember anything in between, and all of a sudden I'm somewhere else hours later with this
great sense of confusion. Aliens and UFOs had become a perfect avatar for me to project my fears onto. A simple story to make sense of what I can't understand.
One of the biggest stories in the news this week is coming from New Jersey over in America.
For the past two weeks, people living in New Jersey are really panicking because they're looking up into the sky and
they're seeing UFOs
or they're seeing drones
They're seeing objects that they can't identify
there's hundreds of videos online all over TikTok of
people in New Jersey pointing their cameras up to the sky and there's strange lights
floating around. The military are investigating, the FBI are investigating, the people in New Jersey are ringing the
police and they can't get a concrete answer. When the people of New Jersey
look up to the sky they experience terror. What are these strange objects in
the sky? Are they aliens? Are they UFOs?
A local New Jersey politician spoke out.
His name was Jeff Van Drew.
And Jeff Van Drew told the people of New Jersey that he heard from a very authoritative source
that there's a giant Iranian mothership
just off the coast, the east coast of America, and this gigantic mothership
has unleashed thousands of small Iranian drones and they're flying all over New Jersey.
And now people in New Jersey are shooting guns up at the drones and still nobody has an answer.
guns up at the drones and still nobody has an answer. Looking up at the sky is a frightening thing for the people of New Jersey because New Jersey
is right across the way from New York and a lot of people in New Jersey around 2001,
when those planes hit the Twin Towers on 9-11, the people in New Jersey, they witnessed it from a distance.
They saw the towers on fire with the smoke going up.
So the sky of New Jersey,
there's a folk memory of terror in that sky.
And also something I find fascinating about New Jersey
in particular is they have a folk monster
called the Jersey Devil.
From the late 1800s all through the 20th century, people in New Jersey reported looking up into
the sky and seeing this absolutely terrifying creature flying around called the Jersey Devil.
It had giant wings like a bat, and this strange long slender horse-like body, legs like a bird
with claws, and then a very evil head, a bit like a goat's head.
And it's this really frightening creature that flies through the sky at night time and
screams and attacks people.
By 1960, so many people were seeing the Jersey Devil flying through the sky
that there was a $10,000 reward for anybody that could shoot the Jersey Devil
or capture it.
So people took this really fucking seriously in New Jersey.
This modern American city just across the way from New York.
Is there actually a fucking...
a horse, a winged horse monster with the head of a goat flying around New Jersey
for the entirety of the 20th century scaring the shit out of people? A lot of
people say there is. Of course I know about the Jersey Devil because of the
fucking Unsolved Mysteries episode when I was a child. But if you look closer at the story of the Jersey Devil in New Jersey,
there's an area of forest called the Pine Barrens.
And during the American Revolutionary War, which would be the late 1700s,
and this is when the colonies of America, which is mostly the East Coast,
the area around New York and Boston.
This was a British colony. And then Boston Tea Party, George Washington, all them cunts,
they fought the British and America got its independence. It's a very short statement
there on the American Revolution. But anyway, not all Americans wanted revolution. There were Americans who supported the Brits, who were loyalists, who wanted America to
stay a colony of Britain.
So when America got independence, those loyalists, they're stuck in America, but they've just
lost the war.
They weren't very popular.
So what did they do?
A lot of them fucked off into the forests of New Jersey, into the Pine Barrens, outcast
ex-soldiers who had to hide, they had to hide away in the forests of New Jersey.
But they made the forests a very terrifying and dangerous place to travel through.
They became outlaw gangs that would violently rob people who travelled through these forests.
So the people of New Jersey became terrified, terrified of travelling through this area
of forest known as the Pine Barrens.
And it's around that same time that sightings of the Jersey Devil first start to appear.
The people in New Jersey, they'd just witnessed gigantic fucking war with the British, revolution,
they might have seen massacres, they're a traumatized population, and now when they
go through the forests, they can be violently robbed at any time by an enemy that they can't
see and they don't even know if it's there.
So this weird folk monster starts to appear.
The Jersey Devil.
A horse with the wings of a
bat and the head of a goat that screams through the night. Fuck that. Now nearly
200 years later you're looking at the news and the people in New Jersey are
firing guns into the air because there's all these unexplained drones and UFOs
flying around and they're all looking up and they're all seeing them.
Some people are saying it's aliens, other people are saying it's an Iranian mothership
from Iran full of these Iranian drones.
There are things floating around.
You can see them on video.
There's strange objects in the sky.
And then finally today, an official answer was given by the sky. And then finally today an official answer was given by the FBI.
And the answer from the FBI is, yeah there is stuff in the air over New
Jersey. There's airplanes, there's lots and lots of commercial drones, unmanned
drones, and there's satellites up in the sky. But what's happening is that for
some reason the people of New Jersey are collectively
panicking.
They're noticing things in the sky that are always there.
They're pointing up and they're looking at airplanes.
And everyone's frightened and everyone's riding themselves up and they're looking at airplanes
and pointing.
And the airplanes are now UFOs.
And there's drones up there.
There's hundreds of drones all the time
that people just don't notice.
And now they're noticing them.
In the way that, I don't know,
if you buy a fucking Ford Fiesta,
all of a sudden you notice every single Ford Fiesta on the road
and you think there's loads of Ford Fiestas.
You're just noticing them.
So the people in New Jersey, for some reason,
they're freaking out.
They're freaking out and they're all looking up
into the air.
They're freaking each other out.
And they're all seeing UFOs.
And I think the source of anxiety is
America's just going through a great change right now.
But first off, it's New Jersey.
So like I mentioned,
they saw the Twin Towers blown up from a distance.
There's a culture of seeing unidentified flying objects
that are terrifying in the sky.
That's part of folk culture in New Jersey.
And as well, Donald Trump is about to be president
in a fucking month, and he's doing mad shit.
He's appointing Elon Musk to a high government position.
He's appointing Robert Kennedy wants to get rid of the polio vaccine.
Vince McMahon's wife from the WWF is going to be running the education department.
America right now is facing massive uncertain change.
Elon Musk says he wants a recession.
Elon Musk says he's going to deliberately do a recession.
America sees how much of its weapons and how much help it's giving Israel.
And American people have phones the same as me and you.
They're watching butchered Palestinian toddlers.
It's a very overwhelming, frightening, confusing
period of change. So of course the people in New Jersey think that there's
an Iranian mothership floating off the coast of New York, ready to unleash
thousands of drones that are floating around their head. What a simple, what a
lovely simple story that lets you take out your gun and fire it
up into the air to give you a sense of control.
Just like 200 years ago, a newly independent country just after a war can't go into the
woods or you get robbed by bands of outlaws that you don't know whether they exist or
not so you invent a flying horse goat.
America has formed for this shit. The
greatest example of course is 9-11. So America... the strange thing with 9-11 is
that the American collective consciousness willed 9-11 into existence.
Now I'll explain what I mean by that. America had defined itself in the
second part of the 20th century
as being one of two superpowers. It was America, capitalism versus the Soviet
Union, communism. So America was good versus evil, one of two superpowers. Then
in 1989 the fucking Berlin Wall falls and America is left as the only global superpower.
America doesn't have an enemy anymore.
It effectively won.
And then the millennium is ten years away.
Everybody was afraid of the millennium.
It was just kind of freaky.
No one felt good about the year 2000 happening.
There was a queasy feeling that the world was gonna end.
It's just like, I don't want to be entering a new fucking millennium.
Two thousand years after the birth of Christ?
Why do I have to be that generation?
Surely something's gonna happen.
And then the early 90s, people start talking about the Millennium Bug.
I remember the Millennium Bug.
This was a huge fucking deal in the fuckingium Bug. I remember the Millennium Bug, this was a huge fucking deal in the fucking
90s. Computer scientists came out and said, the computers that were designed, the internal
clocks, the calendars in these computers, they don't go to the year 2000. So when the
clock strikes 12 and it turns into the year 2000s, all the computers might stop working
and planes will fall from the sky.
Planes are gonna fall from the sky when the Millennium Bug kicks in at that when
the clock strikes fucking 12. And this was discourse. People believed planes
were gonna fall from the fucking sky. Life support machines were gonna stop
working. Electricity was gonna stop working. The entire world will be
descended into disaster, chaos and Armageddon as soon as that clock
strikes 12 on the Millennium because we've relied on computers too much. And
this was in the fucking news for years. Billions were spent trying to stop the
Millennium bug. Of course nothing happened at all. But America in
particular found itself by 1990 as the only superpower.
And then this general feeling in the ether of the world is gonna end, something's gonna
happen in the year 2000. So what you begin to see in American culture in the 90s, disaster
movies. There's a fucking insane amount of disaster movies from about 1994 onwards.
And also computer graphics started to get really good.
Special effects started to get really good in the 90s.
So you have films like Independence Day, Will Smith, one of the biggest films in the 90s.
And it's a film about America.
It's America and then aliens come down and they blow up
American skyscrapers and famous buildings and monuments.
It's a terrifying visual spectacle of American skyscrapers being blown to bits and people
falling from buildings.
You die hard with a vengeance about blowing up a tower.
Fucking Armageddon, another film. Cities being blown to bits. You had Godzilla,
1998. A big lizard kicking the shit out of New York City. Deep Impact, another film about a
meteor falling from the sky, crushing the shit out of New York City. The Siege. The Siege is a
film that's so fucking accurate no one even talks about it. The Siege is Bruce Willis and Denzel
Washington, 1998, and it's literally a film about New York and a bunch of Islamic terrorists blow
shit up and then the army come in and they put all the Muslim people into camps, and this was 1998,
predicting Guantanamo Bay and it was so
accurate they just stopped showing it no one talks about the siege anymore.
Six months before 9-11 happened the biggest film in the cinema was Pearl Harbor
directed by Michael Bay. A fucking film about the only other time that America
was attacked from the air. Pearl Harbor happens six months before 9-11.
Now am I teasing at some absolutely batshit
mental conspiracy theory,
saying that they knew 9-11 was gonna happen in advance
and they were warning us through films?
No, what I am saying is that the Cold War ended,
America found itself in a state of anxiety
because it didn't have an enemy.
It defeated the Soviet Union. It started to get paranoid. Who's going to come next?
When the Berlin Wall fell and the Soviet Union collapsed and the Cold War ended, what it meant
was for America, nobody's going to nuclear bomb us now. The only power with the capability to destroy
us with nuclear missiles is the Soviet Union and now that's gone. And America
had spent since about 1950 terrified of nuclear bombs. Now that's gone. There was
a strange comfort in knowing that's what the threat was. What's next?
Is it going to be an asteroid? Is it going to be Islamic terrorists? Is it going to be
Godzilla? Is it going to be aliens? Is it going to be the Millennium Bug? It has to
be someone. The entire, the collective consciousness, the culture of America, which had been built
around the Soviet Union are the enemies and they're just as strong as we are.
As soon as that went away, America was left with a sense of anxiety. What do we do now? Who are we
supposed to fight now? To take it back to the Pine Barons and the Jersey Devil. America won the
revolution. Britain was gone. Britain left. Now there's no more war. So the Americans who were walking the forest
in New Jersey, they're terrified of terrorists effectively. The loyalist soldiers that had
lost, they had to disappear to the forests and they effectively became terrorists, hit-and-run
terrorists. The people lost the comfort of the big bad British enemy, and now they didn't
know where their enemy was. So they start to invent the Jersey Devil.
But in the 90s America started to express its irrational fears through disaster movies.
Loads and loads and loads of disaster movies.
So when 9-11 happens and you have this massive spectacle, this spectacle of two jumbo jets
crashing into the iconic twin towers, and
other ones heading for the Pentagon, and other ones that were heading for the White House.
This event that takes place on television.
I remember it happening.
It felt like Independence Day.
It felt like Godzilla.
It felt like Deep Impact.
It felt like all the films we'd been watching for the past five fucking years.
It felt so much like those films, it didn't feel real at all. There's a quote at the time
from the director Robert Altman, film maker, and he said,
Nobody would have thought to commit an atrocity like that unless they'd seen it in a movie.
We created this atmosphere and taught them how to do it. That's what I mean by America
willing 9-11 into existence.
Like that was Bin Laden's second time attacking the World Trade Center.
He attacked the World Trade Center in 1993 with a car bomb.
Didn't do much damage.
But Bin Laden was smart.
You know, when they killed him, they went through his hard drive.
He studied Western culture.
9-11 wasn't just a terrorist attack to kill people. It was a deliberate visual spectacle
to put terror into the heart of America in the visual language that it understood. If
you literally spend the past 10 years and all your biggest films
contain
gigantic CGI scenes of
the fucking White House being blown up by a UFO,
or scenes of
downtown Manhattan getting blown to bits, skyscrapers getting blown to bits
by fucking meteors, then you're letting your enemies know exactly, exactly the thing
that frightens you most.
9-11 Terrorist attacks utilized the language of entertainment, and I don't mean that in
a disrespectful way, but American entertainment in 2001, with giant skyscrapers getting blown
up and cities being torn to bits, that was American entertainment in 2001, with giant skyscrapers getting blown up and cities being
torn to bits, that was American entertainment.
So that's what 9-11 was.
The goal of terrorism is to strike terror into the hearts of a civilian population.
The reason it seems like it might seem a bit far-fetched to suggest that Bin Laden put
that much, or that Al Qaeda put that much thinking
into the attacks is because after those attacks we were led to believe that
these are mindless animals, these are raged crazy lunatics. No they're not. Some
of them are military strategists that know exactly what they're doing. I mean
the IRA, the IRA in the 1970s, the IRA would plant a bomb in a car in London
and they'd put a timer on the bomb and then they'd ring the police and they'd say there's a bomb in
this car on this street and it's going to go off in one hour and then the police would card enough
the area try and get everyone away then the BBC would show up with the cameras and the
car would explode on camera and then that would be in the news later on that
evening. And sometimes nobody was killed with the car bomb but what mattered for
the IRA is that it's on television, it's on television and the British public can
see this and there might have been someone there and then after the BBC started showing
IRA bombs like literally going off on the television, then the IRA used to start, they
used to throw barrels of petrol into the back of cars that they were blowing up just so
the fireball would look massive on the television.
So that there, that's using acts of terrorism as entertainment.
It's using the language of entertainment, it's understanding the visual medium of television.
And 9-11 was that. It was visual spectacle. The terrorists had learned that the Americans
fears through the disaster movies. And whoever wants to freak out the Yanks next
they just got to use drones look at what's happening in New Jersey people
are shooting guns into the air shooting guns at airplanes they're shooting guns
at airplanes because they think there's either UFOs or an Iranian mothership in
the sky but just like me when I was eight years of age and I had that operation, and I wasn't
able to verbalize that fear and that anxiety, so I became terrified of alien abductions,
this is what we do as humans.
And sometimes we do it collectively.
We agree upon it.
We amplify each other's fears until we all see what isn't there.
The people of New Jersey are seeing what isn't there.
They're all sitting around together, pointing up into the sky at an aeroplane, and they're
all agreeing that it's a drone.
Agreeing so much that people are taking out guns and shooting airplanes.
And we did this in Ireland too.
In the seventh century, the seventh century in Ireland, there's multiple reports of UFOs written in the Irish annals
Written in the annals there's multiple reports of UFOs in the 7th century around the monastery of clan Macnay's
There's so many reports of UFOs in Ireland in the 7th century that
You there's evidence of this in Viking mythology at the time.
The Vikings spoke about how the Irish were seeing UFOs in the 7th century.
So Clann MacNais was a very very important monastery in Ireland in the 7th century.
Books were being written there. Ireland was a very, very important site of Christianity in the world.
And the monks of Clam MacGnaes, written down in several sources,
they were plagued by UFOs in the 7th century, but they're UFOs.
They used to see ships in the sky.
The monks would go outside and they would see sea ships, like fucking ships, but they're up in the clouds
and sometimes all the monks would go outside and they'd see
men jumping from the ships, so they're looking up into the air and they see these ships
floating in the clouds and men would jump out from the ships
and appear to swim down to the ground to the monks
but the men were drowning in
the air and the monks were terrified.
There's these men drowning in the air in front of them.
And this used to scare the living fuck out of the monks.
What we have to realize about the anxieties of the time is that Christianity had arrived
in Ireland.
By the 700s, Christianity was in Ireland only 200 years.
And Christianity is an eschatological religion which means that
it's very much concerned with the end times.
When Christianity reached Ireland with Saint Patrick,
the Roman Empire was collapsing. Right, so the known world
was completely collapsing. And what that looked like is that the Roman administration
Which had kept kept like towns and fucking roads and kept shit together that collapses
So you end up with warlordism. So Europe becomes
frightening and destabilized and violent and unsafe
frightening and destabilised and violent and unsafe. It felt as if the world was ending.
Within Christianity, this is what's predicted the world is supposed to end and then Jesus
Christ comes.
Also within Christianity, the world ends when Christianity reaches the farthest part of
the world and in the 500s.
Ireland was the westernmost part of the known world.
When Christianity reached the monks in Ireland, they truly believed, we are at the edge of
the world here, there's nothing beyond the Atlantic, so now that we have Christianity,
we're here to usher in the apocalypse, the end times are fucking common, and we're here
to usher this in, we're just waiting for it.
The strange thing with the ships in the air, and thes in Clam Mac Nghia's, it's a weird little
mix of Christian belief and then indigenous Irish folklore. So Christianity
believed in the firmament that basically up above the sky God had put a second
sea. So if you were to sail too far off the edge of the world, beyond the coast of Ireland,
you might find yourself up in the sky.
But within Irish pre-Christian belief, we had...
We didn't have heaven and hell, or end times.
We had the other world.
We had a parallel existence.
There's a parallel world where the fairies live and you can enter this through the mist
but in the Irish monks writings
About these ships floating through the sky and the the lads drowning in midair in front in front of their own eyes
There's a fella drowning in front of me. So basically
For the lads in the ship and for the man drowning, he's literally underneath the ocean.
But for the monks, they're in this world.
So what you're seeing there, it's a blurring of the two parallel dimensions.
Like when the fairies present themselves as animals.
You think you're looking at a deer, but what you're seeing, it's really a fairy and that's
how the fairy must present itself in this reality.
Or the belief that a sacred well, that at the bottom of a sacred well was the mirror to the other reality.
Or the mist, the morning mist, was the blurry line where you could cross between dimensions.
And this is Irish indigenous folklore, pre-Christian belief.
But there's a beautiful story. I think it's written down in
the Book of Invasions, but there's one story about the monks of Clan Macnay's seeing these UFOs,
these ships, and it contextualizes it a bit. And it's a beautiful example of the inventiveness
of Irish storytelling when it takes in the batshit world of pre-Christian mythology.
So the story goes is that there's a group of monks and they're on a ship and they're
sailing to Rome.
So these monks, they're on a fucking ship, they're on the sea, they know what they're
doing, they're going to Rome.
But then a storm hits, a bad storm, so the monks on the ship say fuck that. So they throw the anchor
over the side. So then the storm passes, everything's okay, and the monks go, right, let's go on
our way now to Rome. Let's pull the anchor back up. But as the monks on the ship pull
the anchor back up, it's stuck on something. They can't pull the anchor back up.
So they get one of the monks, the youngest fella, and they say,
jump overboard there and swim down to the bottom
and get the anchor and pull it out of whatever the fuck it's stuck in.
So he jumps down and swims down, follows the chain, and goes to the bottom of the anchor.
But he discovers an underwater monastery and he sees that the anchor of the fucking ship is stuck in the bell
tower of an underwater monastery. And all the monks are underwater too and they're
pointing at him. They're pointing at him but they don't seem to be behaving like
they're underwater. They're not swimming. They're underwater, but they're on solid land. Now the story flips to the perspective of the monks in Clan Mac Nise,
and now it's the monks in Clan Mac Nise, and they're there in fucking Othely, and they're
looking up, and they see an anchor in their bell tower, and there's a man in the sky swimming,
drowning. So they climb to the top of the bell tower, and they rescue the monk who's drowning and bring him to their land.
Meanwhile, back on the ocean on the way to Rome, the monks that are in the boat are like,
ah fuck it, he's dead, he's after dying, and they take their ship and they fuck off to Rome having lost a crew member.
Meanwhile, your man, he's actually in the parallel reality of Clon Macnoy's and now
he's living with the order of monks that he swam down to and he spends the year learning
the rules of their order, their prayers, their artwork. One year passes and now the lads who are in Rome, they sail back to
Ireland and exactly on the spot where your man had died a year ago, they now see him at the surface
asking to be rescued. So they bring him back on the ship and they can't understand. It's like you
drowned a year ago, what's happening? And he tells him all about the underwater monastery that he visited and teaches the lads on the boat, the prayers
and the artwork and everything and then the lads on the boat go, fuck all that shit we
learned in Rome. That's bullshit. We're going to take on the rules of this new underwater
monastery. So that's a story there from the 11th century. That's an Irish story from the 11th century. Like, unbelievably inventive.
Dealing with parallel realities and universes. It's a Christian story that isn't tied down
by the constraints of linear time. Instead it has weird Irish parallel circular time
that you find in pre-Christian mythology. That's otherworld fairy shit. But that story written in the 11th century, it was the monks in the 11th
century trying to figure out why the fuck were the monks in the 7th century?
Why were the lads in Clam Macnoy's writing all these stories about
UFOs, about ships floating in the air? and then you have to look at the world, the world that they lived in.
The monks of Clan Macnoy's in the seventh century, the Viking raids hadn't started yet.
The monasteries in Britain and Ireland, come the eighth century I think,
the Vikings used to raid and pillage the monasteries.
They'd kill people and steal everything.
The 7th century monks in Clam Macnoy's, they were aware there's this huge threat out there on the
oceans. We haven't seen it yet. We've heard about it. But ships of foreign men are gonna come up
that fucking river, and one day day they're gonna kill us all.
So just like the people in New Jersey. Of course those monks in 7th century Ireland are gonna look
up to the sky and someone's gonna point at a cloud and go does that cloud look like a ship?
The fear and the uncertainty is gonna be so great that they'll collectively hallucinate.
They'll hallucinate fucking ships in the sky.
Let's have a little ocarina pause now.
I'm gonna play an ocarina and you're gonna hear an advert.
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Unrolly fucking ceramic otter after blowing to his tail While I thumb his rectum
You'd have heard an advert there for some fucking bullshit.
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please it keeps this podcast independent too means i'm not beholden to any advertisers
i'm going to go through my 2025 gigs now because I'm conscious that some of you want to get tickets as Christmas presents
January the 27th. I'm in Vicar Street in Dublin. That's very nearly sold out now, right?
My Dublin Vicar Street gigs are wonderful and fantastic. This is a lovely quiet Monday night gig
Then in February, I'm up in Galway in Leisureland. I've got a great guest for that gig that's on the 9th of February.
Then on the 21st of February I'm up in Drogheda in the Crescent Hall.
28th I'm in Belfast Waterfront Theatre.
March I'm in the Ainec there down in Killarney.
And then Cork Opera House on the 13th of March Australia and New
Zealand in April that sold out and then on the 23rd of April my biggest ever
gig in Limerick my biggest ever gig in my home city of Limerick in the fucking
University of Limerick concert hall and then what have we got big giant tour
there of England and Scotland in June and this one is setting out quick now because of
Christmas tickets, right? So if you do want I know you might think June is fucking ages away
And it is ages away like June is fucking six months away or something like that. But while you're thinking that
Someone's buying the ticket as a Christmas present. So these are setting out fast so if you definitely want to come to one of these UK shows
don't wait until June basically and I'm in Bristol, Cornwall, Sheffield, Manchester,
Glasgow, York, London, Edinburgh, East Sussex, Norwich.
Go to fain.co.uk forward slash blind boy
to see all those gigs.
I hope I mentioned them all there.
Hope you enjoyed this podcast.
I didn't want to interrupt that hot take
with the ocarina pause, so I just went straight,
straight long hot take, and then the ocarina pause at the end went straight straight long hot take and then the
ocarina pause at the end which is a slightly different structure but I hate
fucking sometimes I don't like splitting the hot take in two you know but I
wanted to explore anxiety I wanted to explore collective anxiety this week and
how it can induce mass hysteria and mass panic. It's just a part of the human
condition. Whether it's in New Jersey right now, seeing drones in the sky, or Ireland
in the 7th century seeing ships in the sky, the same shit we're still human beings. I
most likely will be back next week. Next week is Christmas Day. Next week is
Christmas Day and the temptation is to not put a podcast out next week, you know,
to take the time off. But at the same time, this is seven years of the podcast
and I'm just very grateful that this podcast is still here after seven years
that it's still going strong, still with a fuckload of listeners.
So, I think I will put out a Christmas Day podcast.
I'm doing it because I know there's a law to ye that...
Christmas isn't crack for everybody. You might want to get out of the house, you might want to go for a walk.
You might want to treat it as just a Wednesday. So I'm gonna try and do a podcast for those people.
I might do something a bit festive-y.
This was not a festive-y podcast.
As you can tell, my voice is fucked again this week, by the way.
I've had my third, my third cold of the season, so my throat is a bit country.
I'll catch you next week on Christmas Day, you glorious pricks.
In the meantime, Robert Dogg,
Jenny Flector Robin, tug at the pubic, tug at the pubic hair of Santa Claus. Dogg bless.
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From James Mangold, the visionary director of Walk the Line and Logan, this powerful
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Watch the trailer now and get your tickets for a story that inspired generations.
A complete unknown, only in theaters December 25th... You You. You So. So you. So.. So you you You.. You You You You. Thank you.