The Break-Up Diet - Red Flag or Just an Ick?

Episode Date: July 16, 2025

Ever caught yourself cringing at a text delay, a privacy screen, or yet another 3-minute voice note? 👀 In this episode, we’re diving headfirst into the world of red flags, pink flags, and the infamous ick — decoding what they actually mean, and why your gut might be trying to tell you something.We’re breaking down the difference between serious deal-breakers and petty turn-offs, exposing shady phone habits, and unpacking that weirdly common line: “You’re not like other girls” (ick, red flag, AND misogyny all in one?).Plus, we’re asking: Is refusing therapy a red flag now? Are icks just your intuition saying “girl, run”? And why do modern relationships feel like we’re dating toddlers compared to our mums’ generation?If you've ever second-guessed yourself after getting the ick or debated whether you're being too harsh, this one’s for you.👉 Tap play, trust your gut, and follow The Break Up Diet — because some flags are waving for a reason.Send us a textInstagram:@the_breakup_dietTikTok:@thebreakupdietEmail: [e-mail]

So welcome back to another episode of the Breakout Diet. Today I think we should talk about you know red flags, pink flags, Ix, they're all kind of in it. Do you think, I have a question for you, do you think that Ix and red flags are kind of the same? Oh, I don't know. Ix is very very subjective as opposed to red flags are quite objective. Do you think red flags are objective all the time? Yeah, I feel like there are some red flags that's going to be red flags for everyone as opposed to icks. That's a very personal thing. You don't think people can have the same icks too?

We can have the same icks, but I think red flags are more prominent as opposed to icks. Icks vary. Okay so red flags are like worse. Yeah like for me say an ick is like a piercing that could be an ick for me but not an ick for someone else. Okay okay I get you, I get you. So could an ick be kind of like a pink flag? Because your pink flag's like, it's kind like amber, you know what I mean? Like it's like, it's sometimes bad, it's sometimes not that bad for someone else. Pink is ick territory. Red is extreme. Red is we're getting out. Yeah, do you have any red flags that you want to tell me right now?

My parcel of red flags. Yeah. Let's switch it up. We've been holding back way too much. Welcome to the breakup diet. My red flags that I bring. Either that you've had or that you bring. Oh, I was going to say, like, that's something that you should answer. Red flags that I've seen, just being like shifty on their phones. Yeah.

That is like such an obvious red flag if they're talking shit about their mom. Or if they love their mom too much. Yeah, both. Yeah. Both. Yeah, I think the, what is it, a red flag is like when they have a privacy screen. Do you think? Yeah. I've got a privacy screen.

I know. That's why I hesitated when they said it. I think it's such a red flag. Why? Because why do you have a privacy screen? Because I don't want people outside to see my stuff. Do you know how common it is, like, when you're texting someone and if someone sees they're gonna like film it for like clout. That is such a common thing that I've seen on like pages like Shade Burrow and the Archbishop of Banterbury.

What are you texting that they're gonna film about? I could be texting anything. No one's looking at my phone. Because I'm fucking funny. Of course people would be like, ugh. Maybe I'm not funny. That like no one's looking at mine thinking like. That you know of.

That's the thing. I don't know if people are looking. I don't know if they are looking. So it's like a protection for me. Also, I'm on my phone at work. I don't want people to see me posting on the breakup diet. Okay fine, fine, fine. Yours is maybe because you were like, you, but then I don't know, if a

boy has a privacy screen and I'm just thinking, what other bitches are you texting, if I'm being honest, we can have a different opinion, but like, that's what I'm thinking. I'm like, why they have a privacy screen? Like you're not- Protecting their data, protecting their information. They could be literally like looking at a picture of their passport, uploading it, and someone sees their details.

Like... Evie- We can disagree. I get what you're saying, I get your point, but I still think it's a red flag. It's a pink flag for you, it's a red flag for me. Or it's a green flag. Ange- It's not a flag for me at all. It's just like, doesn't impact me. Evie- Is it a red flag for you, or a pink flag?

If they don't text you all the time but then they'll hit you with like a four minute voice note? It is a pink flag but like I hate voice notes when they're that long, just type it to me. Yeah. I don't have time also my attention span doesn't span for four minutes, I can't. Yeah, yeah. I don't like a long voice note but I do like a voice note. Yeah, I love a good 30 seconds, just tell me how it is, like.

Yeah, like, hey, you buy this place, like I'm picking up this. Easy, but when it's like a four minute, chitty-chatty like thing. You're not listening to a podcast. And if you are, you're listening to us. Duh, exactly. You know what I mean? Also, yeah, especially a voice note if you're first you're listening to us. Evie & Tilda & Kat-Dah-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor-Tor- or all the points that they said. G. There's like too many points in the voice notes, like I'd rather wish it was a text side answer properly for you. L. Yeah, you could take your, you know, your points, you could see it, whereas a voice

note, you're almost going into your notes out, jotting down, he talks about this at the start, so I have to mention this, then I have to mention this, then I have to mention this, listening to it again and again, it actually turns into like a 30 minute voice note. G. Oh my god, it's annoying. I wouldn't say it's a red flag per se, I just think it's annoying. L. Yeah, it's an ick. G. It's a massive ick, like just don't.

L. If they always talk to their mum and call their mum, but like all the time. G. Ick. L. Yeah. Ick, pink flag, not red. G. Not red entirely, but it is pinkish red. L. Yeah, it's like on the borderline of red because when you're in, you don't want them to be calling their mum more than you. Yeah, like I don't want him to tell his mum stuff about us as well.

Which she obviously will because if they're speaking all the time, they have nothing else to speak about besides like, oh, I'm sure they have other stuff to speak about, but like you would be coming up. I would feel like a second best option and I can't have that. That's not a relationship for me. Yeah, or you're in a throuple. That is not a throuple you want to be in guys. No.

Oh, a red flag or a pink flag if he says he's not into labels, let's just see where it goes. Red. Straight up red. Also, you know what you want and if you don't know what you want, get to know. Be decisive. But the thing is, like, if they're saying they don't know what they want, they want your body. Yeah, or they don't want you.

That's what it is too. Either they don't want you or either they just want you for your body and that is just a red flag. Yeah. That's not good enough. No, kick him to the curb. Okay, red or pink, if he's 33 and still figuring his life out. Red, red. But then also, I think it's red, but then do you think that people nowadays are less like mature than what they were?

I kind of get that. I kind of get that. Like we are really like not as mature as the previous generations of like 20 year olds, 30 year olds. Now we're like kind of infants for too long. Yeah, because even like, I'm thinking about even like my parents, like my mom. They had their shit together. Yeah, way before me.

Like she would have definitely had her shit together now and I still don't have my shit together. Like, my mum, like, my age, she's had like three kids by now and here I am messaging her being like, thank you so much for the Easter egg. Yeah, yeah, so why do you think that is? Hang on, let's stop this for a sec. Subscribe and follow The Breakup Diet. You don't want to miss another episode.

We can't really afford to date and marry anymore because things are so expensive. Yeah, maybe. But I do, yeah, I get what you're saying. I think it is a red flag because I'm like, ew. I feel like by 33, surely, you'd have some stuff together. You'd still have at least your career in progression. Yeah, I feel like there's a level of it maybe, but then also it's not that far away. So I'm like, shit, like three, like for you three years goes fast. But like I'm thinking the

last three years for me even. It's all gone so quickly. Yeah. Let's not justify why he's saying he doesn't have his shit together, but- He doesn't, so it's a red. It's pure edit. Let's just leave it at that. Yeah, it's a ick, because you can have the potential to have your shit together and you're choosing not to. Red.

Red. Red. Okay. Do you think it's a red flag or a pink flag if you've been dating for months but never met their friends? Ooh, I think it's a red flag. Why is he hiding you? What if they don't have any friends?

That's a red flag because why do you not have any friends? Evie But what if they're just like super busy with work? Karly That's a red flag because why are you not able to balance everything all at once? I can, why can't you? Evie There we go! That's the end of that one! Karly Red red red!

Evie For red red red! No go for Ilva! If you have no friends you're a loser and I'm not giving you any time! Karly It's an ick because I went on one date where he said that he basically doesn't really have friends and I'm like, oh that means that you're gonna latch out to me and you're gonna just expect me to be around 24-7 and I can't help it. I'm too busy. I'm too busy to pander to a grown man in his 40s. Pfft. But what if you then got all the attention and you were just like

on the pedestal for that? Oh, that's just not what life is about to me. Like there are bigger purposes for me than to be in some guy's pedestal. Fuck that. Fair enough. There we go. Red. Red or pink.

He doesn't post you, but he's quite active on social media. So he does post other stuff, but he's quite active on social media, so he does post other stuff, but just not you. Well, red. Like, if they're posting already a lot of other stuff, then I'm like, come on. Especially, like, imagine if they, like, posted, like, a thirst trap before a boy, but then wouldn't post you. I would be so red that it would, the flag would be so red. Have you noticed, like, men, when they're on like a boys night out their story is like a 36 part story expanding on Instagram and Snapchat, but then when they're with a girl, it's like, nothing. I haven't experienced that.

Oh, I've seen like my guy friends when we're all like hanging out together. It's like a whole movie. But then when they're like dating or like with like a girl or a guy, it's like nothing. Hmm. That is interesting. Yeah. I've never seen that, but I, wow. Yeah. It's insightful that that, that makes sense. They're like taking close up pictures off their beer and stuff.

But like, when you're hanging out with a beautiful girl, who's obviously objectively more beautiful than a bottle, you know? On a good day. You know? Oh, okay. Yeah. So is it a red flag or a green flag if like a boy says that you're so different and not like other girls, but like all the time.

So like you're, you know, you're hanging out and literally all the time he's like, oh my God, but you're just like not like other girls, but like all the time. So like you're, you know, you're hanging out and literally all the time he's like, Oh my God, but you're just like, not like other girls. Is that a red flag? I think that's a red flag because he thinks that women aren't great. If you're telling me that I'm not like other girls, actually I am like every other girl I've met. I am like everyone that I've met all in one. It's such an insult to like the girls around me to girls in general. It's disgusting. To me it's like bordering on misogyny. Actually no, it is misogyny. Fair. Good, because to be fair I've never said to a boy you're not like other boys. I've never said that. No, I compliment them. I say like

oh my gosh you're such a gentleman but I don't need to put down an entire gender just to compliment you. Yeah, I get what you're saying. It, but I don't need to put down an entire gender just to compliment you. Yeah, I get what you're saying. It might be a nice thing if they said it like once or twice, but if they're saying it consistently being like, you're not like other girls, and I'm like... You think I am like other girls, also, I would think that. You think I am like other girls, but you want to try to make me feel special. Like why? Why are you trying to like love bomb me? Yeah. You know, there's like a different agenda.

Another thing that I think is a red flag and it's not even a question. I get this when guys come out of the way to be like, oh, I'm not really into white girls, like the pale skin. And I'm like, do you think that's going to make me like you more? That's so bizarre just in general, because like, why would you feel the need to say that anyway? Do you think that's going to make me like you? Don't know. That's so bizarre just in general because like, why would you feel the need to say that anyway? Do you think that's gonna make me like you?

I think no. That's so bizarre that you get that, but weird. They're so confident with it as well. I think they're doing it to get like, um, brownie points. Yeah, they- To be like, pick me, like, I'm, I'm one of the good ones. Like, I'm all work and yeah. When people say that they only like a specific type.

Yeah, when they're like, I'm really into brunettes. I'm like, shut up. If a really hot blonde came up to you that had a banging personality, you wouldn't be like, no. You could prefer something just by on looks, okay, fine. I'll let you have it. Don't make it your brand. Yeah.

I only date people with brunette hair or things. I'm like, no, you don't. I could bet so much money on that you would date everyone, that you're for the streets. That's why you're saying it. Yeah. To make us seem like as if we could be something exclusive because I'm your type. Yeah. Or like guys when they've like say the opposite. So like, if they were talking to you, they'd say they're in the like dark hair, but if they're talking to me, they don't think so. they're like blonde hair. I'm like, oh.

So what's the truth? Pick one. Yeah, literally. And Oriches don't pick one at all. Yeah, leave us alone. Like it's icky. And a red flag too. Do you believe in X? Like, do you think they're a real thing? Because there was like this clip that went viral on TikTok about howicks don't exist and all this and it's like if you really like somebody they're just not icky. Yeah I actually kind of agree with that. So do I.

I agree with that. Because if you really like somebody- There would be no icks. It would be like a cute little quirk. Yeah and you'd like see past and you might be like oh that's a bit weird but like whatever who cares. If you don't really like them you'll find the ick and you'll- The icks will come to you. And you'll latch onto the ick and you'll- The icks will come to you.

And you'll latch onto the ick and you can't unsee the ick. Yeah. It's like kind of like an intuitive sign. Yeah. It's your body telling you, isn't it? Yeah. 100%. Ooh, I already know your answer to this one. Oh, let's hear it. Okay. He gets defensive when you bring up your boundaries. He gets defensive when you bring up your boundaries. Ooh, that's such a red flag.

Such a red flag. It's like, why does it bother you that much that I want to be with someone that's clean? Or like, that's like an example. Yeah, I was like, yeah, fair. I just don't like defensive that much. Why are you being so defensive? Are you that boundary? Like, if I'm saying I'm not into creepy guys, are you a creep then?

Yeah. Yeah. If I said I needed something and like I don't want you to do something like you should respect it and don't get defensive because if you're getting defensive, are you doing something shady too? Like, you know what I mean? If I said that like my boundary was that you don't go out with this one girl because you just have a thing with them and then you- That's history, yeah. Yeah. And then you're, even if you run into her but you're staying in an active place with her, that's a boundary. And if you get defensive about it- G. There's shadiness all over and to me that's a red flag, not even an ick. It's just like

unexcusable behaviour. Red flag. L. Yeah. Is it a red flag for you if they're really into like star signs, but they kind of use it in a way of being like justifying actions. They didn't turn up for you in this point when you needed them because like… The Libra moon is rising. Yeah, that totally. 100% a red flag because you're using something to manipulate the situation, your behavior. You know what I mean? I think it's very manipulative to use astrology as excusing your bad behavior. You know what I mean? I think it's very manipulative to use astrology as

excusing your bad behavior. I've got one. He tells you that he's too sensitive when you bring up something serious. That is, I mean, it's a red flag, but then also maybe it could be pink. Yeah, it depends on the context. If they're being an avoidant red flag. Yeah, but then also there are topics that are serious sometimes. And it's a bit touchy. And also especially depends on how fresh it is, you know what I mean? So I feel like that one can be pink purely because sometimes there is a bit of an allowance on really serious topics. But if it's like something that isn't that deep, but they're getting really sensitive and defensive about it, I'm like, ew. What are you hiding?

Yeah, it's always what are you hiding, let's be honest. Yeah, that's what I get from defensive behaviour. Yeah. I feel like most people get that from defensive behaviour, don't they? Hmm, it's like there's something there, something you're not telling me. What is it? Is it an ick or like a red flag? So kind of, we've kind of turned this into ick, red flag or pink flag. Three options.

Yeah, pink flag. When you start dating someone, if they like kind of text you and then they don't text you for ages, to like the end of the day. You know what I mean? So they text you in the morning, like good morning, you reply like, you know, just because when you see it or whatever, like 20 minutes later, you reply. And then they'd wait again till like the whole day, even though you know that they've had like a lunch break, you know they've had like time to even say, I'm good, thank you, just

a while, what do you like? You know? I know, like texting back is such a quick thing I don't get when people like I'm such a bad texter you're on your phone dude I don't get it either like I get it when you get overwhelmed or like if you're really busy with work or having stress oh if you're not on your phone physically yeah I'm editing 24x7 so I'm on my phone and I like reply immediately yeah yeah if I'm not replying it's the issue because I'm like in the shower or something.

I'm eating. Yeah. Okay, if you're at somebody's birthday or something. Yeah, or if I'm filming. Yeah, but that's like max an hour. Like I'm sorry, but an hour and then you could even send like a thing of being like, hey, I've just got this. Sorry, I'm busy, I'm out. Yeah. I'll talk to you later. I don't get it when people say that bad text is you're not, especially when I see you on your phone all the time. Yeah,

that that annoys me a lot when you're on like TikTok or you're on Instagram or you're on your phone. My girlfriends are the worst texters, but like they're always on the phones. I know that annoys me too. I see their phones and it's like all these fucking notifications and I'm like, babe, do you not wanna like... Clear it. You know? Yeah. Yeah, the red thing. Yeah, when there's like 40,000 emails or something and I'm like, dude...

Oh, I have the emails on. I have the emails on. But I don't have any others. Like, there's no notifications on any of my texts, but the emails, because I have like three emails or four emails and like they're like subscription things. There's not even, oh, okay. Yeah.

My email for work and stuff like that. They're all clear. It's like the ones my like junk one email that I like all pops up. Yeah. Yeah. And if they're like job, text to them. They probably replied very fast. Yeah. Yeah. very fast. Yep.

Priorities. Exactly. Sorry I don't bring in money, but I bring a bang in personality. Yeah. And we might bring in money at one point to the lucky husband. Who knows? Yeah, we might. This is obviously a red flag already, but like, if you're the one who always has to

initiate hanging out. Oh, such a red flag. It is also icky because it's like why not being a gentleman and doing something for me? Yeah. I actually saw this thing as well. This is also me being on TikTok. Jesus, I love watch so much stuff. But like this guy was saying it's really hard to be a man at the moment in our age brackets because women have been pushed so much into doing the best careers, like being not forgotten about as such, or being able to succeed. And they're not needing men.

And then there's a lot of men that aren't employed anymore. They're just not knowing what to do because they don't really have a purpose. So it's actually a lot of men are thinking it's like really hard to be a man nowadays because women are, you know, overachieving in comparison to what they used to be. So then they're feeling a bit like... Excel with us, Excel with the women. Like this all sounds like excuses after excuses. There's still jobs out there. I'm sorry, it's just bums defending themselves of being bums.

I'm sorry, there's no educated woman that's gonna wanna be with a bum. Like, get a job, chase your ambitions. Like... Evie Yeah, yeah, yeah. I get what you're saying, but then I also must be like, there is, we have to admit that there is a lot of pressure on being a boy too. Kite Oh yeah, 100%. There's pressures on both ends.

Yeah, there's pressures on both ends, but I also think that there definitely is still more on men to be like the man. Yeah, the man, the bread provider and everything like that. I get it, it's hard, but equally like this is the system that men have created. Do it, just work. If we are like pulling up our boots and working non-stop, why can't men? Red flag, ick. Is it a red flag or a pink flag or an ick if they say that they don't do therapy because they just want to deal with their own stuff alone and they won't do it? What are you doing to deal with it, honey?

Yeah. I think it's such an ick. Or they don't believe in it. Oh, that's a red flag. I think therapy is like gym. Everyone needs it. I think to not believe in it is- Is such a red flag. Yeah.

Therapy is the best thing ever. I changed my life for good. Yeah. And also it just helps to like, you know, talk to somebody that isn't like in your circle. Yeah. And also it just helps to like, you know, talk to somebody that isn't like in your circle. Yeah. Having a third party person tell you something that is probably obvious to you and your friends. It's just nicer to get that validated being like, oh shit, like actually, yeah. Yeah. And then they're just like, you can make a clear decision and be like, okay, no, they don't know them. That's not okay. They're not biased in some way.

Yeah. Or just telling me what I want to hear because I'm my friend. Yeah. I feel like that's a hard thing with like friends when you give advice. It's going to be a bit biased. Yeah. And also like your friend wants the best for you, but then also sometimes if you're not ready to hear it or if you, I don't know, I think it's hard to give advice.

I think with therapy, it's like when you know, you're, you're there to hear it or if you, I don't know, I think it's hard to give advice. I think with therapy, it's like when you know you're there to hear it, anyone that like bags on therapy, I can't trust them. Yeah. And mentally like stunted as well. Yeah, especially nowadays, there's being so much more common than it used to be. And it's so accessible now as well. Like there's online therapy, you don't even have to leave your house. Yeah, yeah.

Literally have a Zoom call or whatever. And then it's like easy. So easy. It's the best thing ever. Otherwise, let's chat GBT, use her as your therapist. Yeah, literally. Anyway, well, thanks guys for listening to our red flags and pink flags and X. And all the wonderful colors in between. We hope you've learned something. I know I have. Yeah. you