The Break-Up Diet - The Pain of Losing a Best Friend

Episode Date: November 7, 2024

Can losing a best friend be more painful than a romantic breakup? We explore this heart-wrenching topic through personal stories and emotional insights. From the end of a best friendship during a divorce to betrayals in teenage years, the aftermath of friendship breakups can leave a lasting void. We also address the difficulty of seeing mutual friends continue to associate with former friends and the challenging path to recovery and self-reflection.Ever lost a best friend over a romantic interest? The pain of betrayal is real, and it's something many of us have faced. We discuss the red flags of toxic friendships, such as friends who disappear when life gets tough or those who blackmail you. One-sided friendships can be exhausting, and losing a best friend can cut deeper than losing a boyfriend. Through personal experiences, we share why the bonds of friendship feel so unconditional and why their loss hits so hard.Starting new friendships can be an emotional rollercoaster. We talk about trust, the phenomenon of being "love bombed" by new friends, and the delicate dynamics of integrating new friends into existing circles. Whether you've handled friendship breakups with direct conversations or ghosting, it's crucial to approach these situations with dignity and respect. Leaning on family, especially mothers, for support can provide much-needed comfort. We remind you that growing apart from friends is natural, and new connections are always around the corner.Send us a textInstagram:@the_breakup_dietTikTok:@thebreakupdietEmail: [e-mail]

I know you've always been saying that situation breakups are hard. Friendship breakups. Yeah, they're harder, for sure. So much harder. You lose the person you tell everything to. Whereas like with a breakup, you probably don't tell them everything. No, exactly. Exactly.

And I think with friends, it seems more unconditional. Like you think friends are genuinely forever. Relationships, we know in the back of our head okay this not sure but with friends especially when you like connect with them so well you think okay yeah this is my girl my ride or die for the rest of my life and then for it to go away where you don't have your partner in crime anymore where you don't have that person to share all your exciting news and to just have a gossip like yeah also you probably bitch about your boyfriend or your girlfriend as much to your best friend so they know all the details of like the inner workings of that buckle up bitches it's gonna get bumpy this is the breakup yeah oh my gosh yes so in winter i had a situation breakup and a best friend breakup within months

apart i would be so upset i wasn't normally functioning in the winter i generally thought okay everyone hates me i'm the problem because when you lose the two core people in your life. Were they best, best friends? Like as in, was it your best friend that you lost? Yes. Not just a close friend, like a best friend. No, like a legit best friend. We used to do everything together.

We used to even coordinate our outfits. We were like 20s. Oh God. That's the icky. God. Did you look better in the outfits? Is this why actually no impossible she was like she is a 10 out of 10 model like fair yeah we still hate her but fair what's wrong with me why did that happen to me back to back maybe it's good because you're

going through a cleanse like the new year the new you that kind of vibe it was like out with the old and in with the new started the year wrong not strong am i right was it like an instant thing that you guys stopped being friends or was it like a long time coming i think it was a long time coming we were kind of drifting apart as my divorce was finally like finalized and i was coming out of my shell wait this is kind of interesting was it was she the person you leaned on most while you're going through the your divorce yes oh so she was like you're fine now see you later oh maybe it's a good thing because she's like you're fine now see you later it shows that you're like you don't need her anymore but i still no no no we're looking at it as a good way a good thing

at least she was there for you in the tough time now that you're better yeah yeah no i'm obviously grateful for the fact that okay at the time when i needed a friend like her the most i got to have that friend but i just i don't get why you can't be best friends forever. I definitely think that a breakup with a best friend is way worse than a boyfriend. It made me forget about my situationship. Like, screw the guy. Who is he? Yeah, it hurts so much more. So much more.

But there's also like a difference between having a breakup with a close friend and a best friend. Because although you might have a close friend and then you have a breakup with them as such that's so upsetting it's still not quite the same if it's like the best friend that's rough yeah have you had any recently i haven't had any recently but i have had a few close friend or best friend two close friend and one best friend how How were they both the experience of it? The breakup experience? Well, backstabbing bitch is all I'm going to say. I'm still salty. I'm still salty. It was a long time ago, though, but I'm still a little salty.

Can I ask what happened? Well, she basically lied. Okay, bearing in mind we're like 14 or 15 at this time, okay? Okay. Okay, nothing in the coming of age activities was going on for me, okay? Okay. Okay, get what I'm saying? Anyway, she basically spread around the whole school

that I had a threesome in the back of a car with a boy and I hadn't even had sex before. That's disgusting. And then got boys to lie about it because she was jealous. That's disgusting. Come on. I'm not even kidding. And I was so upset because she had like this one boy that obviously fancied her, right?

Who obviously fancied her was then like, oh, yeah, I'll say it as well. So then she obviously had boys and girls saying it. And I hadn't even had sex. I hadn't even kissed a boy. I think I was scared to talk to boys. So I was so embarrassed. Virgins get slut shamed the most. Yeah, but also, thank God, there was, like, another boy in the year

that was, like, friendly with me, that was actually, like, my friend and knew me. So, like, he kind of was like, what? That's not true. Really? But thank God. And she was my best friend for, like, a year. Okay, not a long time, but, like, a year.

But we did everything. Especially at that age group, my best friend for like a year. Okay, not a long time, but like a year, but we did everything. Especially at that age group, that best friend means forever, that kind of thing. So if you haven't guessed, today we're going to be talking about... Friendship breakup. They suck. Oh my gosh, yeah. I'm still kind of slowly recovering from it. I'm seeing like my mutual friends still hang out with her and I'm like, oh. So no. recovering from it I'm seeing like my mutual friends still hang out with her and I'm like oh you know what I find so hard about that is because you don't want them to hang out with them you want to be like don't hang out with them but you can't do that either well it's hard because I'm the one that put that group together oh that's rough that's really rough you're like

I made you friends now that I'm not friends with you you can't be sorry I know that that people like you're not allowed to do that but you should be allowed to do that I think you know there's there was no integrity no yeah no one had my back to be honest I think that should be a thing if you made them friends if you back away from the friendship yeah yeah um that is wrong but yeah it's so confusing I stand by it honestly the way I had to I basically had to have a mini breakup diet because of the friendship breakup where I'm like okay who am I without xyz who am I on my own um What are my interests on my own? Literally just trying to pick up the pieces. I have a question for you.

What for you makes a good friend? Well, everything my best friend was. So why did you have a breakup? She said that we don't have stuff in common anymore. That's rough. Yeah. And you were blindsided by this oh I'm sorry and you were just like okay I'm just like oh but like we can still like hang out and she's like what like for a catch-up you don't even drink anymore and I'm like no one drinks to get

drunk so it shouldn't bother you that I don't drink oh no i feel like yes i got given my reason but i don't have that closure and i'm seeking that closure like you would be seeking from like a situationship breakup have you have you seen her since no not even bumped into no that's weird no i've seen like all my friends hang out with her. So are you sure there's not another reason? There could be and maybe I'm just not self-aware about something. Maybe I'm just dumb. Maybe I did do something and I don't know.

Maybe my self-awareness hasn't developed properly. I feel like there would be something more, surely. You can't just be really good friends with somebody and then just do that yeah how long were you like best friends for three years that's a long time yeah it's not like a short time so three years and one of the the years was when we were like drifting apart oh for like a whole year yeah so when you say drifting apart is there anything you notice in particular or what well she moved out of London so oh yeah but that's not your fault yeah so it was just drifting apart because of like geographic geographical reasoning okay so i never took it

personally and then we went on the girls holiday that's where it all kind of comes out doesn't it girls holidays yeah why what happened nothing came out then but there was just awkward tension. All those girls met up in London again without me. I messaged my main girl being like, hey, what's going on? Yeah, like, why aren't I invited? Yeah, basically. And then she's just like, we just don't have stuff in common with you. Oh, so she didn't just kick you out.

She exiled you from the group. That's so rough. Sorry. I shouldn't have been laughing, but that's giving Regina George off Mean Girls. Basically, at this big age, we're going to be playing Mean Girls. Oh, I feel so bad. That is really rough. Yeah.

And this was this year? Yeah. God, you had a bit of a year. Right? That's not nice. So you haven't answered my question, though, about what makes a good friend. I need like four or five. I'm okay.

What makes a good friend to me is support. Trust. Yeah. Trust. Loyalty. Fun. Loyalty. Fun.

You know the answer. I don't know why i'm blanking i just keep thinking about my ex-best friend wait trust loyalty fun support encouraging yeah positive the ideal close friend is someone that you can celebrate everything with not just your downs because have you noticed there are a lot of friends that will be around you when you're feeling down because they kind of thrive off your negativity. But then when you're doing well, these friends are suddenly nowhere to be found. But I get also people being jealous because it's hard not to be jealous. I'm going to put it straight. So I don't get jealous of them, but I would get jealous if I don't feel like I'm doing enough.

Yes, that's the kind of jealousy I get too. Or I don't know where I'm going. In my life, yeah. And I'm like, why am I like this? i'm jealous of how they figured it out yeah yeah yeah yeah it's more like kind of kick up the ass motivationally yeah still there's like a ugly underlying feeling of jealousy which i beat myself up about because it's like but i think i'm happy but then why am i not like that yeah yeah yeah what are some bad traits of a best friend or like a friend that you would be like no jealousy the ones that kind of make weird digs at you yeah so they'll be like oh you're wearing too much makeup right now your lashes oh are you

really gonna wear a skirt out or yeah oh isn't that just a bit attention seeking oh wasn't that thingy's boyfriend you were talking to for so long as in like trying to make a claim even if you were just being friendly or you know what i mean they're just like little shit stirrers they're not mean but the way that they're said and they're passive and you overthink it and also you know what you're doing yeah they know what they're doing and say they don't what they're doing. And say they don't, like they do. They 100% do. That's probably the worst kind of friends is insidious, passive, jealousy. I think a bad friend or a toxic friend would be somebody that only wants to hang out with you when it's like a Friday night or something like this.

They don't want to hang out with you or just see you normally. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They just want to have a night out. Yeah, because they know that maybe you'll be going to somewhere fun or whatever. Sorry, back to the digs thing. I've thought of something really funny. So basically, on my wedding day, my childhood friend, we grew up together. She talked about my makeup and was like do you not feel

you look like a corpse on my wedding day she said that i look like a corpse what did you do obviously i was you're like no bitch but you're about to be dead yeah exactly you're about to be the corpse like could you imagine you've got like the wedding day nerves as it is and you've got this like childhood hometown bully that's like oh you look like a dead person just about to go out yeah did you cry i would have cried i was just paralyzed in shock you know when you're like okay i'm meant to feel the most beautiful it's my wedding day yeah and you're here to support me yeah and like big me up even if i look bad okay maybe help me fix it yeah and then like don't tell me with it yeah yeah not oh you look like you're dying you're about to die honestly my wedding as well yeah i hope you're

not friends with her not really no forced to be friends with her because of our families, but that's it. Okay, okay, then I'll let it off. Otherwise, Ilma, you've got to be less simpy. I know you're simpy with men, but not with your friends. Yeah, or I can be simpy with my friends too. Oh, no. It's hard to let go, though, when you have some people, for example, that are good friends, you think, and that you put a lot of time into,

you have so much fun with but in return they don't show you as much support or anything like that that I find that dynamic really hard I'm trying to cling on to the friendship and I'm like oh we just have all these amazing shared experiences I can't let go of this friendship even though it's obvious we're both growing apart but then also that if they're not the same anymore it is time to move on sometimes yeah I think it's just hard to know when to leave that friendship have you ever found out something that one of your friends said about you behind your back that was like really bad and shocking? Not really, but I did have a best friend at the time where she was going to set me up

with this guy that I really liked. And she was like, by the end of winter holidays, you guys are going to be an it couple. She started sleeping with him. Yeah. And that was also a best friend as well. So had you met this guy before or anything? Yeah, we had like accounting class together oh and she like and she like was like trying to get you in there but secretly get

herself in there yeah and she had a boyfriend it's like girl you're don't be greedy yeah yeah i was 19 at the time i really wanted a boyfriend yeah she took that away from me yeah because he liked me as well but then he got men he just got led the wrong way yep yep yep the friendship breakup have you had another one not in recent times no apart from just that one at the start of the year do they get any easier when they're like keep going or not really? No, because like I said before, the friendships that you have, you think they're forever. You think they're unconditional.

And then for it to go, you're like, what? You're meant to be by my side forever. Have you ever had something when your best friend has like, you've confided in them and then that's the right word, isn't it? Yeah. You've confided in them about your relationship and then right word isn't it yeah you've confided in them about your relationship and then they've told your boyfriend or they've told like that kind of situation god forbid that's not happened to me i feel like that would be

oh yeah imagine you tell them like a secret like oh my god i hate the way i don't know my man does this yeah and then he she goes and says it to like his friend that is some pick me ass behavior yeah genuinely like why are you trying to ruin my relationship my man doesn't want you yeah or just like why are you trying to ruin it full stop yeah what's another like toxic trait that a friend could have they have to watch out for the ones that are there for you when you're really down and are thriving from how down you are but then when you do well they're just nowhere to be found or they're not as happy for you as you know you would think because they were there for you when you were really low yeah so i have another thing of a bad friend like that would be like a red flag they do you a favor for example they cover for you

and then they like remind you of that so they're like keeping score on like blackmail oh that's bad isn't it that's terrifying but some people are like that they're like oh just remember like i know threat alone is like why are you doing that to me yeah and also like why are we friends like why why would you want to blackmail me yeah why are you getting a weird kick out of this yeah explore therapy i was gonna say like explore smm or something same same yeah yeah or another bad thing about like a friend would be always one-sided so you're the one who always has to you're the one organizing everything and then they flake and they don't like reschedule because it's a courtesy if you if you counsel on someone you go

okay because i can't make it today can we do another day my treat or something yeah yeah you try to make it better instead of worse better yeah i hate flaky friends you're the one who always reaches out you're the always one who always checks up how they're doing you're the one it's like one-sided that's also horrible oh it's just tiring have you been ever been had that happen yes oh my gosh it's so exhausting and i think this year came to a point where i'm like i don't need to be this desperate yeah I've definitely had it happen but not even I've not realized till like later and be like oh my god why am I the one who's always initiating hanging out yeah but then some people are just

bad too like actually they don't mean to be they just are like that because they maybe never had to i agree i agree but it's just shit being on the other end of it yeah literally so bad ilma why do you think it is way more hurtful for somebody to lose a best friend over a boyfriend i think a best friend is someone that you actually genuinely plan a future with because you talk about weddings together you talk about you know be fun to have kids together like you plan on like living this life in parallel and it's almost unconditional where you think okay this is my girl yeah yeah forever boyfriends come and go we know this we've been taught this but girl girlhood, sisterhood, that is forever. And for it to just...

Yeah, I definitely think it's because you tell them so much and you tell them even more than your boyfriend. For example, like when I first started dating my boyfriend, I would definitely like not... I wouldn't hide things, but I definitely not share things, whereas like my best friends would know. My best friends know like everything. Tell your boyfriend I killed the person the sorry no that went so dark this went like really like you're still in the corpse you're still thinking about your friend

that called you a corpse yeah basically do you have any like regrets when you've had a friendship breakup maybe I should have drank. Maybe I should not have stopped drinking alcohol. That's bad, though. You don't want to know the friend if she's ditched you because you drink. Don't drink. Yeah, well, that's what it felt like. Oh.

Sorry. Made you sad for you. No, it really does. Maybe I should just go back on. Maybe I should go back to rehab. No. I was obviously blindsided with my best friendship ending. Have you ever, with your friendships ending, have you ever seen it coming? What are common signs, would you say, that a friendship is coming to an end?

I think if it's like, for me, the only time i have seen it coming is when you've moved away or something like this or you've had a massive change or the thing that you used to always do with that best friend for example i had it with a best friend we used to when we were best friends i was going through like a dark time i know this sounds bad but like i was going through like a i was just sad way more sad and stuff. Anyway, I would go out so much and we used to go out together so much. And then when I kind of came out of not feeling as low, I didn't want to go out as much. And being around that person reminded me of that.

So then our friendship kind of drifted and like separated it took a long time but maybe that's like a sign so a lifestyle change a lifestyle change you know what i mean like why should a lifestyle change impact it i don't understand well i mean it i think it depends on your friendship really how deep it was like as in how best friends you actually to the core were. Because we obviously weren't. Okay, so she was like your party girlfriend. My party girlfriend that we were best friends because we were always together. But I wouldn't say we were actually best friends.

Yeah, okay. I feel like you have to put your friendships in different categories. Yeah, so... But if it was like a best friend, I never had it where i've had it like a leader but if it was it'd probably be like they just start annoying you maybe that's what happened sorry maybe i just started annoying her yeah maybe she starts bitching to other people which is bad like about the small things that then add up to the big things yeah and then they get involved and then they're like oh okay then we won't hang out with ilma anymore okay yeah maybe okay i mean it's not nice but maybe that's it i mean this is kind of closure yeah yeah i'm giving you closure

you always do with the situationship and now with the friendship breakup this is the breakup diet when you know that phase in the breakup diet where you reach out to your friend, this is it. Is the breakup diet the same with a situationship and a friendship? Well, for me, whenever I've had a friendship breakup, I don't not want to see people. When I've had a breakup with a relationship, I am like severely depressed and don't want to see people, can't even fathom eating because I'm just uninterested by it for like two days. And then after I want to see people, but I'm kind of just dead behind the eyes. Corpse-like, if you must. With a friendship breakup, I probably am more angry the whole time.

The grieving stage is different. So with a relationship, you go through the entire emotion, the sadness, the questioning, the anger. Yeah, what could I have done? Like how could I have been better? But then also like how could you do that to me? Yeah. Thinking about all the happy things.

Whereas with the friendship breakup, I think it's – It's just pure anger, isn't it? Yeah, I think it's anger. And then maybe sadness comes after. Yeah, and then – But with the breakup, I think it's before. You go sad, angry, whereas a friendship breakup angry sad what would you be doing after a friendship breakup so what i did at the start of the year kind of dealt with it the same way as a breakup a relationship breakup where i'm like

oh i don't want to go anywhere i don't want to be outside i feel like i'm not worthy really it got really dark to be fair though you you did lose like my two most poor people like my boyfriend and my best friend it would have been more rough if they started hooking up thank god he's not her type she's definitely his yeah yeah i was thinking i was like trying to make sense of that definitely his time that would have been like the nail in the coffin if they both did end up hooking up She's definitely his type. Yeah, I was thinking, I was like trying to make sense of that. Definitely his type. That would have been like the nail in the coffin if they both did end up hooking up. Could you imagine?

No, honestly, that would be so, so horrible. It's like how much more does God want me to learn? Was a divorce not enough? Yeah, you found it rough, but maybe because you've had it rough so many times, you only got uphill for now. Well, I should bloody hope so, You've had it rough, but maybe because you've had it rough so many times, you only got uphill for now. Well, I should bloody hope so. But then where is the uphill going to start?

How do we get there when you're obviously so guarded from these experiences? Are you going into friendships being wary? Definitely wary. And I'm very hesitant to mix in groups now. Yeah, fair. You're like, different groups, stay here, stay there. Yeah. Which is crazy. I was going to be like, is this why you don't ask me out like shut up you're never here i know i was spilling your leg

i was trying to pull it i was trying to get a reaction just for fun but yeah you always ask me to be fair yeah what are ways that you would do to move on from a friendship breakup i would probably to move on chat shit about them oh my god to my mom who's not going to tell anyone i'm not going to go spread like bad stuff about them to other people yeah if they were a best friend i still have a level of respect oh definitely they did something dirty then i probably would be dirty back i feel like it's fine if they slept with your man it's fine to talk shit about them to everyone yeah i would the entire community yeah exactly yeah but if they didn't do that but like something else i was just really bad i would still tell everybody about the situation if it was more of a respectful thing

like you kind of drifted yeah i would share it on the podcast yeah share it on the podcast no i would um with no names though so yeah everyone's concealed um i would bitch about it to my mom because my mom would give some helpful advice yeah reassure me might add some comments i don't want to hear in there have to give it back to her a bit about whose side are you on mum yeah pick me and then I would probably just try to hang out with other friends and focus in on like hobbies and work yeah definitely it's weird because when you lose a friend just like when you lose a partner you gain so many fun new people in your life how do you let down your guards with a new friend set of friends i think it takes a long time for me for me personally

trust is earned yeah given so that goes with friends too yeah no definitely a long time and different situations that pop up within like life and then you become closer. Some people, this is the same with relationships when they have anxious attachment and they just cling on to you just like they would cling on to with a man. Yeah, almost like love bombed. Yes, love bombed with friends that's actually such a thing because I've noticed I've been getting kind of love bombed with friends where I feel like when I make friends with new people they're so obsessed with me they find my jokes funny they're so interactive with my stories and then you're so cute they find my jokes funny

and then just like over time I. They're like, I am. Yeah. And then just like over time, I'm like not their favorite doll anymore. Oh. Have you not felt that? I just get love bombed like crazy everywhere. I don't know. Lots of my friends have been my friends for years because I have a good, solid group of friends. That's a nice reflection on you.

You see, I don't mind when i introduce people and they become really good friends like i find it like oh that's so cute like you know they found something in common that's nice but then i don't like it if they leave you out yeah see there's like a line yeah i i think it's really nice when your friends get on because then if you're all together you can hang out it's fine you know you're all really good friends but it is awkward if you if they become better friends even though that's nice for them it is awkward for you if you're like them yeah just like kicked to the curb like yeah yeah when you've ever had like a friendship breakup how has that come about like have you been just ghosted have you had a face-to-face

when this girl told you was it over the phone or zoom imagine the friendship breakup on zoom just dial you in on google meet like yeah and they're like enter the password yeah host is gonna let you in host has dumped you get out kicked you out mine was on a call i texted her being like oh i saw you hung out with everyone else when i've asked you to come hang out with me what's up and then she called me immediately and we talked things through and i burst into tears and yeah i mean it was nice and that, you know, we talked it through. Yeah, fair. But sometimes when you talk about things, you get even more confused and you ask questions in your head, like, later on when you've, like,

analysed it over and over again. So I have, like, 10 million times more questions to ask her, but I'm never going to get the closure. Do you ever have when you relive situations? I always have it. All the time. I'm like i'm like oh we have an argument or something and then i'll like relive the argument like

oh yeah but you did this and then like and then i'll think about it and be like oh yeah but also you did this and this and like i will tell you this yeah that yeah yeah if only i could have that conversation again because i would have such fresher points that would just swipe the floor you know yeah but sometimes when you have an argument I find if I'm like a bit shocked or if I'm a bit I just can't like say

I was paralyzed yeah yeah yeah I was paralyzed yeah I just yeah instead I'd be like so so, um, like, we can hang out, please. She's like, no, Ilma. She's like, we've got nothing in common. I'm not going to come down to London for a catch up.

And I'm like, but what about FaceTime? Will you FaceTime me? She's like, Ilma, no. I've blocked you. When would be an appropriate time to ghost a friend? It makes sense to ghost men. an appropriate time to ghost a friend? It makes sense to ghost men. An appropriate time to ghost a friend. Actually, wait.

I have ghosted a friend before. Why? Because she made such moves on my man. And I just felt so embarrassed to have that conversation being like, please don't ever climb on top of my man. Well, she just climbed on it oh yeah like a tree oh yeah in front of everyone and i'm like paralyzed i just had a dinner or something we were walking home together in the big group and she just climbed on top of him

from the front like not even like a piggyback yeah basically valid reason to ghost right if a friend jumps on your man yeah if i would probably just like watch to see what my man did though is that really toxic i'd be like my man failed the test what do you do oh he was loving it he was egging her on ew what they should do in that situation that would be hot as a man would be okay she jumps up you very like gently and elegantly put her on the ground and say please never do that again yeah would you mind i think that's quite disrespectful to ilma bang hot instead he's like whoa you're so light i've had a situation where i wasn't a close friend but like a friend she would always invite all my other close girlfriends on group trips and not

invite me and i would always be like making a conscious effort of inviting her if i did something because i was like no that's mean like i'm not gonna invite three others that you're in a group with and not that person even though you know what i mean you can't do that it's just a common etiquette but after the third time i was like why am i even being friends with this person i don't really like them also they bitch about everybody so i was like i put like three different reasons as to why and i was like not gonna be friends anymore and then slowly all my other friends stopped being friends with her but not i didn't tell them even though i really wanted to be like guys don't hang out

with her she's a bitch she said this about you i still didn't do that yeah you were respectful even though i really wanted to. Nice. It's nice when they're the problem. When they're the problem and you're not the problem. It's like. And when everybody finally gets on your train and you can be like, I was the first person to do that. And you're like, justice feels so good right now.

Literally. And I feel like when people are bitching about their friends it does come back like you do hear it it might it might take a while because people some people are scared of like power in friendship have you ever had like a situation where you've been scared to say something even though you thought somebody wasn't treating somebody else right i don't think i've ever actually come across that situation so what would you suggest to somebody going through a friendship breakup right now? I guess to just... Bitch to your mom, get a hug.

Literally, your mom is the best thing ever. Yeah, yeah. Before your best friend was your mother and you reach out to her. She will have some... Well, my mom will have some funny things to say, I can't lie. She's like, that bitch oh yeah queen yeah and just hold your calm with them be as poised and dignified with it yeah because it does come back to you if you act like a bitch it'll come back to you 10 times more it's not

worth being catty yeah i think for me i've learned that it's actually okay to kind of grow apart from people you still have those amazing memories that you can cherish forever and now you get to be friends with more people and make more new memories if there's some sort of rule like if you've been friends with somebody for like seven years you'll be friends for life that is true that is true because i also find with friends that if you're really good friends, you can go away for so many years or whatever. And just pick things back up. Yeah, those are the kind of friends to have.

So hang on for those types of friends. Yeah, because when one door shuts. Another door opens. you