The Break-Up Diet - We Don’t Like Valentine’s Day… Thank u, NEXT!

Episode Date: February 6, 2025

Can a holiday meant for love and togetherness sometimes feel like a pressure cooker ready to explode? Join us as we share tales of Valentine's Day mishaps, where the expectation of romance meets the reality of unmet desires. We'll recount personal stories of awkward, ill-suited gifts and the struggles of planning the "perfect" day, all compounded by the pressure ramped up by social media. Listen in to find out why some of us are finding solace in Galentine's Day, and how being single on February 14th can be the most liberating experience of all.We dive into the complexities of navigating modern relationships during this holiday. From the subtleties of tagging partners on social media to the drama of receiving flowers from a mysterious admirer, we uncover the silent codes and unspoken expectations of Valentine's Day. You'll hear about the unique challenges faced by those casually dating and how the holiday pressures us to define relationships. Yet, it's often the simplest gestures that leave a lasting impression, reminding us that love doesn't need fireworks to be meaningful.As we close, we reflect on the emotional highs and lows that Valentine's Day can bring. From breakups to commercialized expectations, it's a day that can amplify our emotions and magnify comparisons. We'll talk about the "ick" factor that pops up when one partner lacks initiative, and how mutual effort is essential in crafting something special. Ultimately, whether you're spending the day with a partner or celebrating with friends, we've got tips on staying sane and grounded, and maybe even taking a social media break to truly savor the moments that matter.Send us a textInstagram:@the_breakup_dietTikTok:@thebreakupdietEmail: [e-mail]

Welcome back to another episode of The Breakup Diet. Another exciting, maybe not so exciting holiday to look forward to. I mean, to be honest, I think Valentine's Day is the worst holiday, full stop. Minus the gifts, if you get them, the worst holiday. The pressure. And I feel like this time around, Valentine's Day is on a Friday. There's no excuses. Yeah, also, like, that's a good day though so the girls or valentine's day that's kind of hard actually i mean it's not hard but it's a that's a good vital day imagine you have a bad day buckle up bitches it's gonna get bumpy this is the breakup diet

um valentine's day have you had any good valentine's day i've only had one valentine's day where it's actually with like a partner a partner. Okay, how was it? Only one. I mean, it was nice, but it's not, like, what you think it's going to be. There's so much pressure to it, but then is the pressure even that, like, high? I think it's, like, it's nice, Valentine's Day, but you kind of get in more arguments and you kind of, you expect more. Or, like, I feel like I did.

Like, I wanted, like, a really, like, a surprise or something. And the flowers and the chocolate and the coffee when I'm in bed. I don't know. Yeah, no, I want them all. And it's just, I think holidays in general, they've all been so amplified with, like, social media. You're comparing like oh like this person got this massive ass bouquet or i'm not care about that

when i was in a relationship i would care i would definitely compare really so you see i don't care about necessarily like a big bouquet or something that for me doesn't do it like a bag hello that's true flowers die birkins don't you see i don't even want a birkin i think they're ugly that might be a hot take but like i'm just not into it chanel hit me up but or you know like i love flowers i still want flowers and i don't want the cheap gas station flowers either. I want nice, nice, thoughtful bouquet of, like, pink assortment. Obviously pink. But I don't really care about it being humongous.

It can just be, like, the standard big, not, like, big, big. Yeah, but, like... The standard big is what you like. Yeah. No, I was just going to say, on social media, especially on the lead up to Valentine's Day, you'll have everyone kind of showing off what they've got already, and it's not even Valentine's Day. You see, I would never post my... If I got a Valentine's Day gift, keyword if, I am...

Poor shade, I'm going on my boyfriend. Then I would not post it. I wouldn't be like, oh, he got me this. That's so picnic. Like, oh, he got me the Louboutins. Oh, lucky you. He shouldn't have. Lucky you.

Bitch, you shouldn't have posted it. Yeah, lucky you. Yeah. Don't rub it in my face yeah it's hard as it is out here yeah but what do you think is harder valentine's day as someone in a relationship or as someone who's completely single i think it's probably harder when you're in a relationship. You know why? Because you want it to be so great, and if it's not, like if it's shit, you feel so low and you feel alone. Maybe if you're not in a great relationship or you just have doubts, then it feels even worse because you're expected to be happy dory.

But if you're single, you can do Galentine's Day. You can, you know, it's just a normal day. It goes past like that thank god for the girls because valentine's day rebranding itself to galentine's has been iconic no seriously because as a single person i look forward to valentine's day because i know it's going to be with my girls and i know it's going to be super pretty with like all the cute little cupcakes the cheese board the wine it is something to look forward to but as a person who was in relationships my valentine's day every single one of them i have cried at

restaurants oh why disappointment after disappointment one valentine's day i got taken to tina turner i don't really know yeah i don't know her music so i don't know why he took me there plus that play was really graphic with like domestic violence and stuff so it's not really romantic and to top it off wait but why did he take you to a play he just thought it would be nice thing to do i think so but the thing is would you not tailor it to their interest yeah that's like you know what that is is when they get you a gift that they would really like but they not something that you would like to do like i've such an exciting day planned let's go watch the football

and you're like no that happened on my birthday with the same person so valentine's day tina turner two months after it was my birthday and it was watching fucking Oslo versus Rome in Italy. Ew. Yeah. That's so boring. It was disgusting. How did he present that idea to you? He was like, no, my dad got us a ticket.

It's like we should go like out of courtesy. And I'm like, but it's my actual birthday. It's not even like around my birthday day before day after on my actual birthday i was in this disgusting stadium in rome and then like the valentine's day he was like oh no but like i made an effort you wanted me to make an effort this year so i made an effort oh you wanted me to make an effort that is so gross i hate that you wanted okay so there's not two people in the relationship i hate that comment and then oh my god this is so traumatizing because

it was raining that valentine's day and i was wearing heels in coven garden and he wasn't even holding my hand while we were walking so i'm like trying to like climb over these puddles and heels and just sleeping yeah yeah and he takes me to um an ivy for dinner and not even one of the good ivies like you know the shitty coven garden ones that looks like a pub and i'm all fucking dressed to the nines wearing this like red sequined dress and i just see people like looking all average and shit and he's just like how is this not good enough for you so his big thing was taking you for dinner play and dinner and then the year before oh my god he didn't do anything and then on the last minute he goes to like borough market gets me like the last like single strand of rose and some like cut up like tatted up cake like yeah with like a bit of

love heart and stuff did he like present it in a nice way it was like here bitch damn here i went out ew then another valentine's day it was like a situationship kind of thing he's like do you want to do anything and i'm like oh like only if you want to and he's like do you want to do anything and i'm like oh like only if you want and he's like well you need to pay you've not had very nice valentine's this year's gonna be a good one because i hope to celebrate it with you even if it's not on the day yeah yeah i don't know i haven't made any valentine's plans I'm honest. Maybe he's going to surprise me with the bestest day ever. Actually, I prefer my ideal. My ideal Valentine's would be... Okay, so it's a weekday, so I don't really care about doing anything in the day.

It's a Friday night. It's basically the weekend. Yeah, it's a weekend, but I mean it's in the daytime. Leave me alone. I'm going to be doing my hair because i you just feel good you know good i'm gonna be you know looking pretty feeling pretty treating myself whatever come the night time i walk through the door after getting my hair done and there's just like petals everywhere you know that just lead to like a drink actually you know a getting ready pre valentine's drink with a little cute note that says like i'm the best oh you know that would

be cute and then this better come out like a week before valentine's day so mr boyfriend sees it that is what i'm doing right now and then um you he's like, doesn't tell me where we're going. He just says like, look nice. Be ready at like eight. Hot. That, when a man does that, it's just sexy. When a man like takes initiative, but he does it that it's like tailored to what you like. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Obviously, like a restaurant, a really nice restaurant that it's like tailored to what you like oh yeah yeah obviously like a restaurant a really nice restaurant that i would like and but i need some sort of thought too i need some sort of like nice sentimental value yeah let me go back onto like creating content for valentine's day because i'm quite guilty of it where i would fake my valentine's days even when I was in a relationship even when you're in a relationship yeah yeah so me and my friend we were both like content creators and we both lived in the same building so we would always take pictures together so we planned to buy like rose petals from aliexpress deck it out in each of our bedrooms as if both our boyfriends did it so wait whoa your actual boyfriend saw it

what the fuck did they say who the hell are you sleeping with no they were just like would you block them off your story so my friend's boyfriend was like well now you've made me feel bad and then my boyfriend was like why don't you just ask yeah fair why didn't you just ask? But why should I ask? It's Valentine's Day. I'm sorry. Am I not with a fucking adult and not a child? Yeah, but men are dumb and princesses. I feel like in 2025, men like to be treated like they're the princess. And then women are like, you know, doing all the bits for them.

All right. If they want to be treated like princesses, at least keep your... I was going to say at least like, like, shave your fucking pussy. No! Jesus! But if they want to be like princesses, at least be, like, demure and cute. Because right now you're just, like, shedding hair everywhere,

sweaty and disgusting, offering nothing to the table. I mean, they offer some stuff. I do not think... Agree with me. Like, lots of men are more princessy than ever like they expect the girl to do all the stuff and like bend over backwards you know for them and do all these like cute small intricate little things but then they won't do it for like valentine's day or the birthday or they might do it for one but not the other no it's crazy like with my situationship

when i was when he was asking about valentine's day and i go oh well if you want me to pay i don't want to do and he's like fine i'll just go on a gay boy dinner with my best friend and i'm like okay i prefer to pay my own self at a girl dinner exactly like i will feel more romance with my girlfriends i'd feel more like fulfilled with my girlfriends feeling like the sense of i don't know like belonging community all of that over oh with the man that's like half arsing his way on valentine's day and you still want me to like wear lingerie for you after dinner that I had to pay for? Yeah. Yeah, that's a good thing.

Maybe you can say, well, if you go half on my lapela or my agent provocateur, then maybe, let's talk. Then he would shut the fuck up. A hundred percent. Like, that is expensive. What would you do if the guy took a really sexy photo just of your body, like, without your face in it, though, for Valentine's Day, not necessarily like in lingerie or anything. I'm talking about just like a really sexy photo,

but like a mysterious photo like a girl would do on Valentine's when they don't really, you know, they want to just show that they're on a date. What would you do if a guy did it to you? I don't know. I wouldn't vibe with it. Why is my face on it? Why am I not tagged?

It'll ring a lot of alarms. You know? Maybe I'm just know. I wouldn't vibe with it. Why is my face on it? Why am I not tagged? It'll ring a lot of alarms. You know? Maybe I'm just insecure. No, I would find it so offensive if you didn't put my face in it and be like, you think I'm ugly, bitch? Like, and then also, like, I'd also be like, why aren't you tagging me like you're trying to keep other hoes entertained? Yeah.

So girls are out there doing that with their boyfriends being all mysterious when actually it's kind of insulting it's an aesthetic and an art form when we do it no no it's an insult when men do it no no i'm disagreeing i think it's an insult with both okay you don't tag your partner on your photo It's because you're trying to keep your other doors open. I would never tag my exes because I'm really insecure and I'm scared that girl's going to tap into them and be like, oh, if he landed her, clearly he's, like, packed or something. Sorry, I'm just thinking about your exes and I'm thinking,

you don't have no problems. So, Emma, I actually had a story about, it was not really like, yeah, it is a story, I guess. But so there's this guy and basically whenever he goes on like dates with the girl, doesn't matter how many days. I think maybe it's like two days or something. And he basically has this big list, right? And on Valentine's Day, every single year, he sends the entire list flowers. Like I'm talking nice flowers too. And just like keeps them on the list.

So the florist just gets added another girl or another, not one girl, it's probably about 10, every single year and he just sends it out. Only time I think it gets, like, fully removed is if they have, like, a serious, serious boyfriend. But if it's, like, a boyfriend of, like, one year or something, and, like, they don't live together or something, he still sends the flowers. Oh, my God.

What a troublemaker. Yeah, the shit-stirrer. Yeah. How do you even explain that to someone, like, to your boyfriend, if you randomly got that bouquet? What would you do? Would you lie and say it's from me? If I randomly got a bouquet from a man that wasn't my boyfriend,

I would have to lie because that's weird and then try to uncover who it was. No, yeah. Or actually, to be honest, I probably and then and then show my whole phone and be like i don't have anything on here anyway or i don't know because if you lie and then they found out you lie you'd look even worse if you tell them they're probably going to get angry and be like what the fuck don't believe you but then yeah because it'll like stir up questions starting with why why is he still sending you flowers why is he still i don't know following you are you in touch with him all the questions have you ever got flowers

from men that was like wasn't your boyfriend um no but i did get flowers from my best friend at school and then people accused me of buying my own flowers for Valentine's Day. Oh, why are they so mean? I know, kids are such pieces of shit. Oh, that's so mean. Valentine's Day is really traumatic, Yaz. Get it over with. So what if you bought your own flowers, bitch? Yeah, at least I had enough pocket money.

Yeah. Oh, you're like swearing, you know, when you're swearing, you put it in the jar, you stole the jar. Yeah, exactly. Bitch. Yeah. And what were you like, I didn't buy them. Yeah, and I was genuinely curious because me and my friends, we never really bought each other's flowers because we were at school.

We didn't have money to. So I was genuinely shocked too. Oh, so you were like, oh, I've just got these flowers. She didn't tell you she was doing it. No, because it's like a secret admirer thing oh that's really sweet i don't think i ever had a secret admirer oh i'm your public admirer yeah so am i with you okay obviously single person valentine's day it can be kind of tricky to navigate not because you're like alone and single with nobody on your roster I think it's somehow worse when you've got guys that you're

kind of talking to and Valentine's Day is around the corner and what do you do yeah it's so hard yeah because you don't want to bring it up and be like so are we doing something and also like you don't want to be like you don't want to ask and you don't yeah so if you have a lot on your roster is that the question i'm confused now no i was just gonna say how would you navigate when you know you're you're seeing someone where the lines are a bit blurred nothing's defined or either it's like really early days say's, like, really early days. Say you met, like, someone really great, like, two weeks before. I mean, two weeks.

Like, fuck that. Should you do something with them for Valentine's Day? Like, if they want to take you out for a nice meal, take it, because free dinner. Yeah, of course. But I don't think it's expected. I almost don't think Valentine's Day is expected even up until, like like a month in.

If you've been seeing each other like a month, then maybe you could do something cute. It doesn't have to be super extravagant either. Also, I don't think people need to be doing these big dates. You know, like you don't have to do something super expensive for it to be super nice. Like if you decked out your apartment or the room and made it super cute then that's so nice too i was gonna say i think my best valentine's day ever would be during covid so 2020 21 best valentine's day where he would like decorate the place with petals and stuff and that's cute ordered in like deliveroo got some candles it is just like simple moments where

you're like away from everyone i did that yeah because my boyfriend did a really nice thing like we did go out for a really nice meal in the day this was just like an extra little he went out for a few hours and i was like what can i do oh see that's sweet yeah i think it is cute like in a relationship like if one person does one thing one does the other because i get like there's a lot of pressure for men to do you know a lot and do the most and everything but it is also nice to for somebody to do something else for them too like a little thing even if it's like writing post-it notes around the house or something i agree i agree so like my covid valentine's day like i would do something he would do another thing and it just would be such a nice like weekend off it as well that is cute that is

actually a nice idea if you could do little things for each other but on different days and make it a whole weekend yeah and it keeps the excitement alive it like reignites the spark as well without it being super duper commercial if that makes sense you know yeah with the massive bouquets and the massive like gestures that the men do yeah yeah even though they should do that one day of the week every week every single week for the rest of time yeah put that on the prenup i need flowers not even flowers i need just something something good not even i'm not even talking expensive just good 100 100 treat your woman like the queen she is yes and in return like you will be

treated amazingly as a man yeah to be honest the return is so much more when you treat a woman so great because the way women love

the way women nurture yeah it's like 10 times a return yeah that's why when they get these little breadcrumbs they're still like

they're still you know doing the most 100% and not even their most they're still like they're still you know doing the most hundred percent and not even their most they're just doing like a lot whereas like imagine if you give them even more yeah half the slice of cake could that be over the moon on a sugar high exactly exactly also if you're going through like a breakup in breakup in this time, you have to kind of... We haven't gotten to that. Yeah.

You have to kind of just treat it like any other day, I think. And if you want to do something, like, if all your friends have boyfriends or something and you feel extra, extra alone, I would just make a day of it being, like, self-care. As in, like, either getting your hair blown out or, like, going and getting your hair blown out or like going getting your nails done a massage something that you like relax and feel good i would do or do something that you really enjoy like if you enjoy painting or like going horse riding activity you know what

i mean so that way you can kind of just treat it as a usual day, but you did something fun. Don't have like a big stress on it. And then go to bed early and you wake up and it's gone. It's not even there anymore. Turn off your social media. Bang. Yeah. And also anybody that's posting on their Valentine's Day, like, oh, I love you so much.

It's just whack. They probably pre-filmed it like me. Yeah. Or it's just like, they're not that happy. A hundred percent. That're probably compensating. Like, it's not, I get it. Like, it's nice to post your partner on your page and, like, have them up there also to wear off the other hoes.

But also, on the flip side, you shouldn't have to. And also, it's nicer if you're not even on your phone. Oh, a hundred percent. Yeah. A hundred percent. And also it's nicer if you're not even on your phone. Oh, 100%. Yeah. 100%. And I think, you know what, sometimes as a single person, be grateful that you're single during Valentine's Day because you're not crying on Valentine's Day

because of a man who didn't live up to some expectations. Yeah, or get it. Like, get you or get it. Also, it is hard not to cry on valentine's day or feel bad or sad because especially if you are somebody that does a lot for their partner and then they don't do it on that one day that they're meant to do it you feel so low because you're like they couldn't even make the effort then yeah it's so much pressure and so much expectations and anticipation it's just yeah it's a lot it's almost like you should not have to have a valentine's day

ban it honestly get rid yeah because if you're in a couple it should valentine's day should be like every two weeks i was gonna say every day should be valentine's day if you're in love like yeah i know but that's quite a lot like sometimes you don't like them let's be honest some days you're like some days you're like yeah some days you're like your breathing annoys me

and some days I'm gonna just cheat I mean no this is how you get boys in love they're telling them you're just cheap. Actually. Kidding. What would you do if you had, like, a boyfriend or someone or a situationship, like a big situationship, not like one week, I'm talking like a couple months,

and you're out at a restaurant and they walked in with a date that was obviously not you. Just you were there on Galentine's Day, hadn't told him or, you know, had a dinner with your best friend. And then bang, he walks in, he's there with another girl. I definitely know that it'll end with me getting arrested by the police for assaulting another man. Okay. I'll be so pissed off like what the hell you've been using me you've been using my body and for you to do that to me that kind of betrayal hell no would you walk up yeah yeah i would say yeah i would let them sit down

yeah and i would do it almost straight away so that he doesn't have time to like you know do the due diligence the other way straight up off you go yeah and then apologize to the girl yeah for ruining her night yeah i probably walk up and first say sorry yeah this is probably gonna be a bit awkward yeah and then say and make it very graphic so that it's awkward god thank god i'm single thank god i'm not seeing anyone because valentine's day is galentine's day this year i feel like you can have both there's no one on my roster so i'm really excited that's galentine's day okay i'm gonna have both i'm greedy i want both have you ever had a breakup near Valentine's Day? Touch wood No

It would be hard to navigate Yeah but you've almost broken up with somebody Were the Crying you didn't want to break up? No because I was married Fair Bit harder Was it more than one time with the same guy

That it was bad? Oh my one time with the same guy that it was bad? Oh my god, yeah. Was that all the same guy that it was... How many Valentines did you have with this guy after it was so bad? Was any of them good? The ones during COVID was great. Oh, that was the COVID. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah. And then Valentine's Day as like a fully single person though roster, the best. Yeah. roster, the best. Yeah. Genuinely the best. Fair. I was trying to think what I was like when I didn't have, I've only had one Valentine's Day and it's still like, I'm trying to think. It really has become more commercial in recent times because five years ago, no one really gave a shit.

Yeah. It was more like couples. Now it's like this commercialized thing of galentines and you've got events at bars and stuff designed for it you know yeah i remember when i was single i just wanted to have one because i felt like you want to have one if you've never had one like properly i've been sent flowers before like big bouquets as well. Like, but not by a boyfriend and not by a situation. Scott sent them. Because this guy was like, I think I posted on my story,

like flowers, as you do. Not on Valentine's Day, though. And then I think some guy, some guy did message me and he was like, those were nice, but I think I could do better. So I was like, do better. And then he said, what's your address? And I was like those were nice but i think i could do better so i was like do better and then he said what's your dress and i was like i had met him before but only like once yeah um and like nothing happened and then i was like it's this to be fair they were like this big red roses oh my god that's amazing it was like 100 150 like huge do we see what the lesson is guys i think a key to good valentine's day's

communication you told this guy what you wanted he delivered sometimes maybe that's what we need to do yeah i mean i know we want the element of mystery and the element of surprise but sometimes like you said man of dom well i to be honest this this isn't a good example because it's not like somebody I was actually interested in. Sorry, you just spent that money for nothing. But so then if the flowers don't actually mean anything, it's kind of just meh. But I do feel like the point still stands. Communication is like the best way to navigate Valentine's Day

if you're in a relationship. Yeah, it's funny because now I'm thinking, would I want that from my boyfriend? That wouldn't be the main thing that I would want. It's funny how it changes, doesn't it? It does, doesn't it, as the years go by. Yeah. Yeah.

But I did get a good photo, so people thought I was seeing someone. Oh, amazing. Somebody packed. Packed but gentle with it. Oh! Gross. I've been with it. Gross. I've been celibate all year. What would you do if you had like a friendship breakup and a boyfriend breakup?

Well, that was me last year. And I literally had to just recruit one of my sexy friends to make it seem like I was having a nice Valentine's Day. It's hard because like obviously you celebrate Valentine's Day with your best friends too. Yeah, if you're not with your partner. Yeah. I don't know. I just think it's overrated and just, you know what, put on some Love Island if it's still on or whatever and then that's it. Job done.

Have a glass of wine to yourself. Social media break. Social media break. Get break get off that like stuff that you don't need to be comparing jenny's flowers that are 10 times bigger and her chocolate cake and her ferrari she got yeah because also what is that about with social media like i actually it's less now i think because like a few years ago it was even more where like you're just like posting this luxury of cars and and flowers and big chocolates and you know oh I feel like when you're flexing that much it makes me think like oh are you compensating for something because when I would be in relationships I would be flexing the most flexing the most

they have a boyfriend that I have a boyfriend that like you know I'm taking them like you know because that's like the goal that women are sold you know if you've got a man you're good you know yeah I don't want that goal I would like a man in general because it's nice to have a partner but that's not my goal as in like i i want that and i want i want a nice family and all that but i don't know i think it's cooler if you're like a girl boss and they're like you know have to come up to you and you're like they're like okay i could leave you if i wanted to and it wouldn't make a difference. Yeah, so maybe Valentine's Day, get off social media, get on LinkedIn. Do you have an ick?

A Valentine's Day ick? I think the biggest Valentine's Day ick is there's no initiative. The lack of initiative is such an ick, And it can be from both parties, you know. Yeah. You have to make it special for you guys together. Yeah. The man should do the most, but you should also pick up the ball, whether that's, like, dressing up for him, whether that's, I don't know,

making little notes or, I don't know, cooking for him. That's also pretty cute. I mean, I would find that quite stressful if I had to cook on Valentine's Day because that stresses me out, but some people would like it. Yeah, so, like, one of my best Valentine's Day, when I was in a relationship, he booked the dinner reservation, everything, had the most amazing meal, and then I, like, planned as a surprise a massage back home.

So, like, when we got back to the flat, like there's like two people laid out the like massage bed. There's like petals everywhere. I feel like that's a nice, like that is a partnership Valentine's day type of thing. You can also, Valentine's day can also just break you up because if you're not feeling the part,

like your other partner, and then you're seeing other hot part like your other partner and then you're seeing other hot people about that are in relationships it sometimes also looks a bit like no i think or or like for example if you see a man taking out a girl and you can see from small like behaviors that he treats her really well and really like a princess and nice you know and it's like you can just tell then if you're in a shitty relationship and you're like looking across the room and you see that you're like oh i wish i had that yeah i think definitely sometimes valentine's day if you're

in a shit relationship it will bring up the cracks 10 times quicker all for that day and then what yeah yeah so actually we don't really like valentine's day unless it's only with the girls yeah i think that's the moral of this episode