The Break-Up Diet - Your Friend’s Being Cheated On… Would You TELL Her?

Episode Date: October 7, 2026

What would you do if you found out your best friend’s boyfriend was cheating on her… would you tell her? 👀This week on The Break-Up Diet, I’m getting into all things cheating after watching the first episode of Channel 4’s new six-part series, Break Clause. I’ve ONLY watched episode one so far, but it already gave me a LOT to talk about. 😭We meet Lil and Ben, whose relationship is thrown into chaos just as they move to London together — and suddenly they’re dealing with cheating, broken trust and the very awkward reality of living with your ex. We’re talking about whether you should always tell a friend they’re being cheated on, whether you’d actually want to know if it was happening to you, whether being drunk EVER makes cheating a “mistake,” emotional vs physical cheating, and whether you can genuinely rebuild trust after betrayal.Because honestly… if everyone knows your boyfriend is cheating except you, your friends keeping it from you feels like another betrayal. 😬 Pasted textSo I need to know: if you knew your friend was being cheated on, would YOU tell her?⚠️ SPOILER WARNING: I’d watch episode one of Break Clause before listening because we’re getting INTO it.Break Clause is available on Channel 4. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi guys. So today is going to be a bit of a different episode because Channel 4 actually reached out to me to review and give you guys my thoughts on their new show called Break Claws. And I watched Episode 1. So before I start this episode, I want to give you guys a little bit of a like spoiler alert. If you are planning on watching Break Claws, then maybe watch it first and then come back and listen to this episode because I am going to like dissect the episode so I don't. want to ruin it for you guys. But it's basically about a couple, Lil and Ben, who their relationship is over, but their tendency isn't. So effectively, it's living with your ex. But during the episode one, lots of things came up for me, not just that situation. It kind of made me explore and like think about cheating in general. So things like, if you knew your friend was being cheated on by her boyfriend, would you tell her if you were the person who was being cheated on, but the cheating was like a genuine mistake, would you want to know? And things like, does it matter or does it make any difference if the cheating happens

if you're drunk and how much your friends and your environment actually influence your decisions you make? So those are some of the little subtopics that popped up to me that I'm going to discuss in this episode today. So if that sounds interesting, stay tuned and let's get into it. Buckle up, bitches. It's going to get bumpy. This is the breakup diet. Cheating is obviously wrong, but what I find interesting is how people react to it, why they do it, how people's like friends, if they know how they act, and what happens when you're, you can't just like walk away and you can't just like remove that person from your life.

So that's kind of like everything that went on in this episode in break clause. In the show, the girl, when her parents come, like come to drop off their staff and she just found out that she's been cheated on, she's like, I don't want them to know. And I get that. Like when you first get cheated on, it shouldn't be embarrassing because you've done nothing wrong but it is kind of embarrassing to think that somebody did that to you and also like her parents have just come and it's meant to be super exciting and then she just found out that a boyfriend's

cheated on her and they're like oh you've got to be so happy and she's kind of like huh and in the show like I'm pretty sure he smiles or he giggles after that and she's like you're not allowed to do that and I just laughed at that moment in the episode because I was like yeah damn straight you tell that man he's not allowed to laugh like it's not funny for him to laugh like he actually did the hurtful thing. You can laugh at how horrible and awkward the situation is, but if he does that, like, no. How is that embarrassing? But it kind of is. I don't know. You feel like there's shame, which you shouldn't, because you actually have done nothing wrong. And like, they're the shitty person who broke your trust and broke your relationship boundary

and did it. So if anything, they should feel embarrassed and ashamed, not you, but you still do. You often hear like people don't tell anyone or they just tell like their closest friends but they don't tell anybody else. But then saying that, there is something to be said of like if they do get back together and stay together, sometimes I do think it's not good to tell your friends everything.

Like I have been in relationships where I've told my friends like majority of the stuff and then like when you go through a rocky patch you know and then when you own a really good patch like your friends do remember the stuff and it's quite awkward. Like, I have done this and I have also had this with a friend too where they've like, and you're kind of like, yeah, but he does, he did do this, you know. You should only say if you really know that you don't want to get back with them, especially like when you first get

cheated on or if you first have a breakup, your emotions are so high that you kind of, you do just blurt it out and then sometimes you can regret saying it because you're like, oh God, everyone's going to remember that. But also, at the end of the day, if they're your real friends, like, they know that, they know that, like, they just want the best for you. That just reminded me of a situation where I had that, and I was like, he cheated on me, like, with this and, like, oh, and then my friends were, like, they went in, they went in, being like, he's so ugly. They were, like, obviously, just try to be good friends and try to be, like, nice and supportive and make me feel better, I think. So they're obviously saying that sort of stuff,

Like, and then we obviously got back together and it was like, oh, awkward, because I was like, I know you called him ugly and they were like, I never wanted to tell you this before. I'm like, okay. But honestly, like, I didn't care because I was like, well, I still love him, so whatever. Okay, so going back to break clause with Lil and Ben. So we basically see that Lil's friend is trying to tell her that her boyfriend has cheated on her. because, so she's obviously found out from her boyfriend, I'm guessing, and she's trying to call Lil and tell her and then Ben tells Lil that he cheated on her.

But I do have a problem with it because I don't believe that he would have told her if he didn't think that Lil's friend was going to tell her. Because obviously in break clause we see like the friend is calling Lil and like keeps trying to call Lil and then Ben snatches the phone and doesn't want her to hear her. it and then blurts it out, you know, because he kind of feels like backed into a corner. So I don't think that he deserves any brownie points for telling her because he was kind of forced into it. And I was wondering, do you guys think that it's better to get told by the person who actually did the cheating or whether it's better to let somebody else say it,

to kind of like soften the blow? I don't know. I think definitely from me, I'd want to hear from the person because I think if they've done something like that, I think they should, own up and have the balls to tell me themselves. But I don't think a lot of people would. Like, I think a lot of people, if they were, felt cornered like Ben was in this situation, I think they would just lie. But I want to talk about being the friend. So when you know that your friend is being cheated on by their partner, do you tell them? And also, if you were the friend being cheated on, would you want to know? So those are two questions I have for you guys. So I think I would definitely tell somebody if my friend was being cheated on, there's no way that I wouldn't tell them.

But it doesn't mean that it's not awkward because sometimes you have it where your friend isn't ready to hear it or doesn't want to hear it. And I actually have had this. Like I have had it where my friends have stayed with their boyfriends when I've heard that their partner is cheated or like I've heard rumors of their partner's cheating. So sometimes as a friend, you have to give the information to your friend, but you can't force them to do anything, and that's okay. Like, at the end of the day, they're the one in the relationship, and if they're not ready to walk away, you kind of just have to be like, okay, it kind of sucks because I wish that they were, and I wish that they would leave this loser.

But also, you can't force somebody to do something, is what I'm getting at. in break clause, although we don't actually see Lil's friend telling her, because Ben does it himself already. But I wanted to know if you guys would tell your friend in that situation. And sometimes it can be a bit awkward, especially like if you're in a friend group and the friend group is your boyfriend's friends, not your close friends, you know, then it can be quite awkward

because sometimes like your boyfriend might get a bit annoyed. But if your boyfriend's going to get annoyed at something like that, like at the end of the day, the friend shouldn't be cheating on his girlfriend. And if you're like a close friend group, like you hang out and do things all the time, like you shouldn't be feeling guilty or you shouldn't have to like hide something just because they, the boyfriend couldn't keep it in his pants. So that's my opinion on that. And also I kind of do feel like it's a bit of a betrayal.

So like if you are a friend and you're a genuine friend to the girl, If you don't tell them, I kind of feel like you're betraying them too, because the person who's being cheated on then feels a bit like a mug. And also, like, how embarrassing is it if, like, everybody knows besides you. Like, you don't want to be walking around kissing your boyfriend in public. And then everybody else is, like, secretly knowing that he's kissed about 10 girls at night or is having an affair with somebody else or whatever. Like, that's horrible.

And then you don't just feel betrayed by the guy who did it. you also feel betrayed by your friends. So my opinion is definitely tell the person if you find out and risk it. Like if your boyfriend's going to get mad or if other people are going to get mad, then find a shifty way to tell them. Maybe you don't have to be the one who actually says your boyfriend's cheating on them. Maybe you can just hint at something or maybe you can like, loki set it up so that they find out kind of a bit more organically

if you don't want to be the one to actually say it. It kind of brings me on also to thinking about would I actually want to know if my boyfriend was cheating on me? Yes. There's literally no situation that I can think of where I wouldn't want to know if my partner was cheating on me because if you don't have the information, you can't decide for yourself if you want to walk away or not.

I want to know who I'm dating and who I'm in a partnership with. So 100% if it's me, I always want to know if any of you guys would find out that one of my boyfriends is cheating on me. Let me know, shoot me a DM. And even if I'm not ready to break up with them on that first instance, it doesn't mean that further down the line that I won't be. That's another thing. Like, as I kind of said already, sometimes people aren't ready to hear it. But if you tell them and you do the right thing by saying like, look, I think this is happening, then maybe I don't end up breaking up with them straight away,

but I will remember that information further down the line and maybe I'll get lots of little nuggets of information along the way and then in a month's time, in two months' time, in a year's time, I will be ready to do it and then I will do it. So yeah, there's lots of things within break clause that I found interesting. Those are just a few of them. It was also like the environment, how people change, based on their environment?

Like, do we think that Ben would have cheated on his girlfriend if the girl stayed a bit longer? If the friend hadn't earlier that day mentioned being like under the thumb. So, like, for me, that kind of makes it sound like his friend was saying he was a bit whipped. Like, if all those events hadn't happened, would he have still cheated? Or do you think Ben still would have cheated regardless? Or was it simply just a mistake? That's another thing. I sometimes do think, although I don't think it's correct, there sometimes isn't a massive reason

as to why somebody does something or makes a mistake. And I do think in break clause that he is sincere and he does feel sorry about doing it from what I've seen. But yeah, sometimes, I mean, sometimes it's cheating. There's lots of reasons why they do it. But then also, I do think that it can be a drunken mistake, even though I don't like to say that and I don't condone it and don't think it's good. it does happen. But then again, I wouldn't want to be with somebody that allows themselves to get into that state and that environment and allows themselves to do something like that. So yeah, for me,

I don't think that cheating is okay even if you were drunk. I'm really excited to tune in to the rest of break clause though because I want to know how they navigate this situation of living together and what they're going to do. Like put yourself in this situation. What would you do? If you have a boyfriend and you were super happy with them and you guys had this kind of perfect life-ish and you're moving you're moving to a new city that you both haven't lived in before you're starting like fresh you've got your dream job and the night before you guys move you go out with your friends and then you travel down to london and you find out when you get to your apartment you've like walked into your space you find out that your boyfriend has

has just cheated on you. Like, what would you do in that situation? I have no idea what I would do. Like, I think I definitely would want to take a few weeks if I could and go back home or go stay at a friend. Or if you can't even do that, I would definitely like couch, sleep on the couch and try to avoid them. Because you need a few days or a little bit to cool down.

And then if you can't stay to friends, that's immediately what I would do. I would go stay to friends if I could. But if you can't do that and you both can't afford to move out, which is like the situation and break clause, oh gosh, I would try, I'm not going to lie, I would definitely try to get somebody to like sublet the apartment or I would try to find another couple for the both of us so that we could work out our problems and then maybe set foot again in a new plays a year later where if we are still together and then start over because I do think it's going to be very difficult for Lil and Ben to like have a nice relationship when the first memories

of the first like hour or two have been disrupted by finding out that your partner's cheated on you. Also it must be so difficult or it's going to be so difficult which I'm sure we're going to see as the series goes on to navigate that because like you probably would end up falling back into a bit of a relationship again, even if you try to like put those boundaries up because you're not going to be mad 24 hours of the day. You know what I mean? Like especially when you're going through a breakup, there's so many different waves. So I'm sure we're going to see like them kind of fall into being a familiar couple and fall out. I'm interested and curious to see how they either get back together, if they get back together and try to work on their relationship,

or whether they navigate this breakup and stay broken up with each other but still live together. Something else I thought it would be nice to talk to you guys about. Today would be how do you think you rebuild trust after something like that has happened? Well, I think if you actually want to stay in a relationship with somebody and they have broken your trust, like take this situation, the person who has broken it has to put in so much work to rebuild it. And that means things that you might not normally or might not have done before become things that you need to do. It's not just like that you want to do to try to make the other person feel good. You have to do them. Like you have to communicate more where you are, what you're doing.

You have to stick to promises. Like if you say you're going to be home, by a certain time, be home by a certain time. Because if you're not, you're going to, the other person that's had the thing happened to them, like had the cheating happen to them, is going to second guess everything that you do. You also have to be willing to put up with the person that obviously had the cheating happen to them. They're going to ask you questions. They're going to be, there's going to be moments where they're going to be angry and hurt. And you kind of have to just go through all those processes and remain calm and then also be willing to chat with them and talk about it and say why like i know whenever i've been in a situation where i need the trust

to be rebuilt it has taken a long time like it's not one day you're fine or a week later you're fine like the person really does have to put in the work and it is not every day you have to have a massive conversation about why you did it and la la la but you do have to you do have to do small things for an extended period of time that makes the other person feel safe and secure again. Literally the worst thing is if you're in a relationship where you don't trust somebody. I honestly think there's no point being in a relationship if you can't trust your partner. You shouldn't have to be on top of your partner the entire time. You shouldn't be at work thinking like, oh my God, I wonder what they're doing now. Like they told me they're going to

be back from the supermarket this time and then they're not back from the supermarket this time, like, maybe they're cheating on me. Like, it's such a toxic and horrible place to be in and you don't want to be living in that type of situation. You want to know that your boyfriend can go out with his friends and have a nice time, but not cross any of those boundaries. And for different people, the boundaries are different, but you have to understand and have those talks with your partner and know what your boundaries are. I think you can be friendly with somebody else. Like, You can be friendly and polite. But the moment that you have a bit more of an intention behind it, then that's the line for me.

Like if you couldn't show your partner everything on your phone, it's probably cheating or you probably shouldn't be doing it. And if you're deleting messages because you don't want your partner to see it, that's cheating. Another topic that wasn't really in break clause, but I want to ask you guys about it is do you think that emotional cheating or physical cheating is worse? And I feel like this is where men and women separate a little bit because not all men, obviously, and not all women, but for me personally, and from talking to friends and other women, it tends to be that they think that emotional cheating is almost worse than physical cheating. Whereas like my guy friends would say, they would definitely say that there's no way they would want their girlfriend or the person that they're seeing to sleep with somebody else or to kiss somebody else.

would find that a lot worse than if they found messages. I think both would seriously hurt, and I don't want to say that one is worse than the other because they are both so bad. But for me personally, I think the reason emotional cheating hurts so much is because it's like a constant decision to betray your partner, and it's a repetition of doing it that I think cuts deep.

Like you're not just gone out once and cheated on them. You know what I mean? It's still really bad and I would still be so hurt. But if you're going back and you're going back to message that particular person and you're deleting messages and you're, I don't know, having the thought more than once as well. The last thing I want to discuss with you guys about break clause is why do we think from watching episode one that Ben cheated? Do we think maybe that it was just a drunken mistake?

Do we think that he felt inferior maybe because Lil's got her dream job in London and he doesn't have a job yet? So is he feeling a bit like inferior because her life seems to me going upwards and maybe he's like not quite figured it out yet? Or do we think that he was influenced by his friends? Like what do we think? Why do we think that Ben cheated on Lil? I'm kind of undecided on why I think he did it. at this moment in time, I'm getting the vibes that it was a drunken mistake and it's like going to be this mistake that kind of ruins their relationship and makes it super difficult to navigate from this point forward. Also in the show he said, sorry, I just forgot, but I remembered, sorry, he said that the move was a lot to him. Like, it was a lot moving to London. So

maybe, I don't know, it doesn't excuse it at all, but like he's got overwhelmed with how far their relationship is moving and they're super young. So that also might be a reason why he cheated. Which I feel like is maybe more of a boy thing. Like I don't really hear that many girls that are, get overwhelmed with the relationship so then they act down and cheat. But maybe that's just my experience with the girls and myself. I don't know. But yeah. I hope you guys actually do tune in to break claws and make sure, I mean, I would definitely watch it before you listen to this episode because I've just ruined it. but I'm super excited to see what happens.

I want to know how they navigate this tricky situation, what pops up. I'm sure there's going to be way more curveballs that are thrown our way. And definitely go check it out on Channel 4. And thank you so much for listening.