The Comment Section with Drew Afualo - I'M NICE AS LONG AS YOU'RE NICE | Drew Afualo Ft. Dylan Mulvaney | THE COMMENT SECTION EP 29

Episode Date: August 31, 2022

[video available on Spotify] Drew welcomes Dylan Mulvaney to the show this week to discuss the idea of "spreading love" in life and online. Shop Starface skincare essentials at STARFACE.WORLD — and for a limited time, ALL Comment Section listeners can get 15% off a one-time purchase with the code COMMENT at check out. https://bit.ly/3wK0m3X Drew: https://linktr.ee/drewafualo Dylan: IG / TikTok  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I think there has to be a balance in this world. And so I feel like with what you're doing on TikTok, with what I'm doing, like it kind of neutrals itself. That's what I'm saying. That's what we get along so well. Yeah, we need each other in a way. Yeah, we do. Dom and sub.

Hi, everyone, and welcome back to another episode of the comment section show, starring me, your fay. We already know me. Who cares? Everyone's excited to see the guests. Today, I'm so excited to introduce you all to my favorite person of all time. You already know who she is, Miss Dylan Mulvaney. Hi, hi. Dree.

Do you know you're one of my most requested guests? Are you serious? I'm dead ass. Oh, my God. So many people were like, you have to get dealing on the show. I was like, girl, she's already on the sketch. Also, you know, I just realized we're two girls with boy names. I just realized that too.

Do you ever get, like, hate for having a boy name? Oh, yeah, all the time. What the hell? They're like, that's a boy's name. Well, speaking of comment section, that is my top every comment. It's like, okay, we get that you're not changing your name, but if you were gonna, what would it be? And I was like, babes. I don't want to.

too. No, I love our names. Mine's Drew Buffalo, but it's a little different. It's a little different vibes. Yeah, it's a little different. But I get, yeah, I mean, the whole, it's, that's a boy name. I feel like that's real dated. I know. Or they say the first thing they'll tell me is, is that your real name? And then I go, no, it's a stage name. It's an alias. I'm in the witness protection program. Yeah, literally. Or they'll ask me, is that short for something? Andrew? Yeah. Like, hello? No, literally. I'd tell. I'd tell you. I'd tell you. I'd tell you. I'd tell. I'd tell you. I'd. I'd. I'd say, telling mom, I'm like, nope. I love Drew. It's very gender. I feel like we're like headed towards like gender fluid names. Absolutely.

As they should be. Amen. I don't know why names should be gendered in the first place. Such a progressive podcast. That's what I'm saying. Do do do do do do do do do. My mom actually named me Drew because she said when she was pregnant with me, she saw like a study where it said like if they have like two resumes side by side

and they have the exact same qualifications, they're more likely to pick them in. So my mom gave me a name. Mm-hmm. Oh, that's. So if it's like, if it's like a Jenny and like a bill, they're more likely to pick the bill every time. Misogyny. Damn. It's in everything.

You and I would know that better than anybody. I would say so. Your rise to fame has been meteoric. Love it. I am still recovering from Pride Month. And we're two months out. I think we were just talking in the green room about like how daunting this all is. And it's like, how can I keep up with this all?

No, truly. And it's also something we never set out to do in the first place. You know what I'll say about you, though? Yeah. Is that, well, first of all, when you followed back, there's something about when your favorite, like, your favorite creators, like, follow you back. Or you're like, and it almost feels better than if a celebrity follows you.

Because you're like, oh, my God, this is a real person that I love, like, that also loves me. Yeah. And, but when I first met you, I was like kind of, because you are like, I don't want to say intimidating. online, but you're very strong. And I think I met you towards the beginning of my transition. Yeah. And I was just like enamored by you and how you could stand up to people because I lean

towards submissive. And you're like, babe, let's dominate this. Yeah. Oh my God. I said bitch. You can cuss as long as you as much as you want. We just avoid the F word here. So, but when I first met you, I thought the coolest part about you was how willing you were to

like talk about like little industry secrets with me or making sure that I was being paid fairly or like and that's what I love about I think that's the good part of what we're doing is like protecting each other especially women with what we're doing we have to have each other's backs on all fronts absolutely I was like I remember when we met for the first time it was at milk yes yeah yeah that was the person we ever met in person so you're like one of the few people most of my guests that come on coming here is the first time I ever meet them oh serious yeah most of them I've only ever had one before who I met prior. So you're my second one. But I'm telling you when I met you, it's the exact same as your con. Like I feel like we're both very similar to our presence. No, absolutely.

That's my favorite compliment to get. And you're such a light. I met somebody else. I'll tell you her name later because it's tea. But she literally told me that she loves you so much. And she said, she was nervous to come up to me. I met her at a premiere. She's an actress. Okay. But she told me she was nervous to come up to me initially, but she said she had just hung out with you. And she said, and Dylan told me you were so sweet and that's why I was like you know what I'm gonna go for the record Drew is like very nice person yeah just not if you're a terrible man um that's it that's the that's the only

if you're a terrible man we're nervous for you I'm anything but nice and I need you to teach me how to kind of stand up yeah I'm gonna give Dylan some tips I'm gonna give you a little it's funny because this this episode's called spreading love right yes absolutely and yet I came on I was like I woke up this morning I'm ready to I'm ready to really just lay in to people like I'm like Let's rip them to shreds. I'm more than willing to have to host that for you.

Oh, that's our episode too. We're going to talk about spreading love. I specifically chose this for you because Dylan spreads lots of love. She is just as bubbly and amazing in person as she is online, which is a great thing. I, however, am accused of doing the opposite quite often. But hey, it's gone you here. See, we joined forces.

Right. And that's why I say all the time, I am so nice as long as you're nice. If you keep it nice right and tight around me, you don't need to worry. And I think when I do let loose, that's because somebody's really crossed me. No, truly. But I think there has to be a balance in this world. And so I feel like with what you're doing on TikTok, with what I'm doing, like it kind of neutrals itself. That's what I'm saying.

That's what we get along so well. Yeah. We need each other in a way. Yeah, we do. Dom and sub. Yeah. But I notice, like, because I'm so positive, I sometimes feel like people are. looking for reasons to hate me even more.

Yeah, that's fair. And because it's really easy to, like, I feel like to blow up on TikTok when, you know, you can, like, lay into people or like, with what you're doing, like, I see it as actual good. Like, I feel like what you're doing is very positive and, like, creating change in a positive way. But some people go, you know, on there and just, like, rip people to shreds for no reason or, like, women tearing other women down. Yeah. Do you ever, have you ever made videos about, like, women specifically?

No, I haven't. I made, I think I made one video a long time ago about her, but I didn't talk about her the same way I talked about, I didn't talk about her the same way I talked about men. I just was talking about what she was talking about, but she was being, she was an anti-vaxxer and she was also talking shit on pronouns. So it was like one of those gross things. It was a double, yeah, double-edged sword. Yeah, a real conservative ally kind of girl, whatever. She's not an ally, but just a conservative person. But I have said multiple times on multiple occasions that I'm never going to drag. women the same way I drag men. And I've said that because men do that enough for all of us. Oh, they got that covered. Yeah. But I will say there are women out there that are

trying to take us down. There are. Yeah, I have many of them. It feels like now that I am, you know, I'm still new to like girlhood to womanhood. Yeah. There does feel like this scarcity complex of like there's not enough to go around and then turfs don't get me started.

But I think what's crazy about like women know what to say to like, to your button. They know, well, you know how to find a man's buttons. Truly. And that's why I've said, too,

the only hate that ever really bothers me is when it comes from people that I feel so driven to protect. That's the only time that hate really rubs me the wrong way. Other than like the casual death threat. Other than that. It's more so when it's coming from inside the house. You know what I'm saying?

Yes. It's women or anyone else in a marginalized group. I will say it's, far less than men. I'm operating at like 98 too. You know what I mean? But that two is pretty strong. And they do say some of the most vile things.

Right. And I think because I so badly want to be accepted by women, like as part of the community, it hurts extra bad. And actually, like, that was on day two of girlhood. Like, some women had already been offended. And I was like, oh, my God, I already screwed up on the second day. And so like to come this far and now have like the majority of my followers are women or trans people. And that feels really nice to like have that kind of support.

Absolutely. That's the that's kind of the thing too is like even as the kind of creator that I am now. Yeah. Even when I have women say really terrible shit about me. Like they'll say some really like racist shit about me sometimes. And like even then I like still prioritize them. Keep it close to the chest. Yeah.

I still prioritize women. I still prioritize you being marginalized. I still prioritize you. The second you start using your platform to tear other women down, it just gives all those men. Validation. Yeah. It gives them like confirmation.

And I always think we're on the same side. Yeah. I'm fighting for you, girl. Like what it, yeah. And then that's my, that's what I'm saying. Yeah.

Sorry, like, don't you want another girl in the mix so that I can like be fighting for your rights as well? Yeah, literally. We're strengthening the cause. Power and numbers. Yeah. we can need all the help we can get.

Truly. At this point. Because apparently we're not strong enough. According to all the men. All the men. They were so emotional. Which my page would begs to different. Question for you too.

When you read hate, does that affect you less than when you like watch somebody actually making a video about you? Um, I guess it depends. It depends really because, I mean, typically when men make hateful videos about me, it's never clever. which is I'm sure how your hate is too it's never nuanced the women can be clever about it

the men are like you'll never be a woman bro you know and yeah it's not creative I like that babe didn't didn't hit home but you know who does know how to take me down a notch is when another trans woman

you know speaks on my experience because then I'm like oh it's the call is coming from inside the house truly and that's and that's another thing too that's like a huge internalized issue you know what I mean And so that's why I always say too, like for women, I'm not going to drag you the same why I drag man, but I'm also not going to help you. Like I'm not doing anything for you like that you're on your own at that point.

Like the internalized misogyny, babe, work it out. And I tell people all the time, life is too short to waste it trying to defend men who don't even see you as a human. They don't see you as an equal. They don't see you as anything except a servant and like a hole for them. That's all they care about. And I have men like that have literally been like how, why would you give up your privilege? of being a man to like do this and I'm like

Babe because I had no choice this is who I am The way they run into the point and completely innocent. Truthfully. And then if I tell them you're speaking from a point of privilege they're like Who has more privileges? Women have more privileges Women have more privileges.

Right and then but when it comes like when the hate comes specifically like from a trans woman to me I just have to like kind of get to the point of like why is she speaking on this and I really do listen because I think it's important. Same.

but this one girl's video started with um dillamilmolvaney's personality is like nails on a chalkboard and i was like i should have stopped the video right there because i knew i was like oh we already you know she wasn't going to like whatever i was just either way it's just like at that point it's just opinion yeah and then we were talking about right before this we were talking about like conspiracy theories about us oh yeah and one of i mean well yeah one of mine going around right now is that like i'm a government plant that was put here right before Pride Month to like take down families and the way that they the way that they give us way too much credit well yes but also I'm like I'm the first one to believe anything and well first of all you do so much sarcasm like the Chris Olson episode is all sarcasm

and it goes right over my head so but like when I was watching this video about myself that was like literally about made up lies yes yes made up lies I'm like oh my god maybe they're right like I was like is because well I'm the I'm the first one to join a cult. Like, if somebody's jumping off a cliff, I'm going with them. And so I'm like, wow, I'm, you know, I'm in the Illuminati and I didn't even know it. You're like, wow, thank you so much for letting me know. I know. I'm so glad you tuned to you. If I ever, you know, blink twice in a video, I have joined the Illuminati and I just can't say anything. There you go. The conspiracies, that's why I'm saying it's the ultimate, like, most extensive form of delusion at some point,

where they convince themselves. Oh, I have a question for you. Oh my God, please ask me. So I noticed when I'm really positive, like I try to be really positive on. Yeah. And then when I don't, some people go, oh, what's happening? And so do you ever find when you like, because you like, you know, lay into these men in your videos. And then when you kind of take it in a really positive tone, do some people like get thrown by that? Yeah. Sometimes they'll tell me, you know, oh, I feel like you went too easy.

Or they'll say like, damn, are you? changing up or something like that but listen we all have to adapt yeah when it comes to guidelines i'm pivoting girl every time they change them i got to pivot so but also at the same time we're business women yeah we are business women also you have to keep in mind too i've been making videos every single day for almost two years so i at some point i get bored i got to change it up you know what i mean yeah so i started telling guys think like this one guy oh my god some of these dudes they got so mad at me on Twitter. Twitter's the,

we talked about that too. That's like one of the most rancid places to be, but some what's because our little armies are on their patrolling like they are. It's not nearly as bolstered as it is on my other platforms, but someone wrote, he called me like

a fat bitch. It was something very unbecoming, but also very unoriginal. He wrote that to me and I just wrote back, hey, your profile picture is so cool. And I just put so boss, man. He looked amazing. He looks so sick in that pick. And he

just blocked me. Didn't even... That was probably the most offensive thing you could ever say to him. I had another guy write some terrible shit to me and I wrote back to him, aspiring actor, huh? Because that's what he wrote in his bio. I go, hey, I hope you make it.

He's like, babe, let me call my agents and I'll get you a meeting. Hey, you know what? I'm wishing you the best. You need some, you need help memorizing those lines.

And that's like so much funnier to me because they, they get so much more upset when you talk like that to them. Right. But then some of your fans might read it like out of context and be like, whoa. She wrote. really just changed up her brand there. They always know. They know. They know what's going on. I have nothing but the worst intentions with them. And they write and they write the most terrible

shit to me. And then I'll say something so silly. Like this is a real common one I've been getting lately. They'll ask me, do you have on TikTok, they'll say, do you have any bulking tips, right? And that's a fat joke for those of you that don't get it. They're trying to ask me how to put on weight. So if you think about it, you're kind of dragging yourself because you're saying that I'm bigger and stronger than you. So that's, that's a read. You're like, babe, I have more muscle. But the, but the brain doesn't go that far. But then this one guy asked me that for like the

27th time in like an hour. The same person? No, different person. Oh. Yeah, I just get that comment frequently. And you're lucky number 27. Yeah, I literally wrote back, um, yeah, I have, I have a great tip. Have you ever tried taking Munchma? Do you know a Munchma? No, what is Munchma?

I just go Munchma balls. What I wrote, ever tried munchma and then he said what's munchma and i said much but babe you use their humor against them and then he wrote he literally wrote back what are you seven you ask me you're like babe i'm speaking your language yeah they're like hey you big fat fatty tell me how you got fat and then i was like much on my balls let's have a laugh together and then they're like you're literally a child you started it if we're pointing fingers here i thought you wanted to know if the principal's running up

i'm saying you you started it someone else asked me what do you seven or whatever are like is that's not for real like they get so angry and then I go well if you don't like that you could also try Sugundis have you have you tried those what's the gunnese I'm nervous to add Sugundees nuts they hate those jokes they hate them they get so upset but that's all was like you asked I thought you wanted a bulking tip that's my tip okay I need some of those for like when when they come for me oh they're so easy those are real easy we'll get into that for sure as we said already we're trying to spread love we're talking about spreading love or these nuts, whichever comes first. So here on the comment section, we always bring

videos that I was tagged in and we bring them here and we laugh and we giggle and we tell people to take Munchma if they need. I'm ready. Okay, so this first video, I just give a little summaries of them. This is a motivational life coach talking to the camera saying, have you ever heard of the saying kill people with kindness? Sometimes people are toxic and don't deserve your kindness. Try killing people with silence, right? Which is fair. I think that's fair. I love that.

As someone who tends to overspeak a lot, I wish that was a, I probably need to try that tactic. But oh my God, if somebody doesn't text me back for like, you know, a few hours, sometimes I'm like, oh, my, I've got to go send flowers. Like, and. I feel that too. What's your sign again? I'm a Capricorn.

Oh. I've done a lot of Capricorn slander, Dylan. Oh. I've slown. landed Capricorns up and down the streets. But we're productive and that's, and you know what, this is what I'll say about. We're setting the records straight. So what I say about Capricorns. I, well, my hair makeup artist is a Capricorn too. Oh, well. So, and he knows. And you've got these little pearls and look. And look how beautiful I look. Oh, are those little crimping, the crimping ones.

Yeah. Aren't they so cute? I got to get me. So for Capricorns, they are so charming. Very charming, very lovable. People get close to them very quickly. I'll take it. Which I think is a great thing. However, when they're done with you they act like you're dead and they've never met you in their entire life and I think that's a super villain power that you guys sometimes use you know I will looking back I will say that I have cut some ties

and it feels good I left them in the dust some of those high school friends the way that you just like oh I got a good comment to bring up oh my god please tell me okay this reminds me of this time I was watching this hate heat video about me and in the comments was this

this person that, okay, when I go through hate video comments, I kind of like to take in some criticism. Got it. And I like to see how I can people please. And this one name, like, looked really familiar to me and it said, Dylan only does things for likes and we'll never address this. And I was like, what is this name? So I click on it.

And it was someone from high school. And I click on their profile. I was like, I go to their Instagram. They had DM'd me, like two months before, I don't get to read all my DMs. so I hadn't seen this. Yeah. And so I DM, and it was just like, hey, we'd love to get together,

do some content with you. And I, so I, I then DMed them back and was like, hi, I just saw that you left this kind of rude comment about me on TikTok. I just wanted to see what's up and what I've done to offend you. And they responded and they were like,

oh, it was because you hadn't responded to my DM, you know, prior. So I just assumed that you were now a horrible person. And I was like, Babe, that's, and that's where, and that is the Capricorn in me where I'm like, that's where we leave you in the dust. Exactly. Well, the fact that they're, and were they immediately like, anyways, girl, do you want to make comment? Oh, babe.

Flip the script. They were like, oh, my God. Like, this is so great to hear from you. How have you been? Right, because I'm reading, you know, I'm reading those comments. I don't think they expected me to see that. No, absolutely not. A lot of times they don't.

But that was very telling. Like, I'm glad that I ended up having that moment because otherwise. I would have been like, what did I? I would, you know, be losing sleep over it. No, literally. And it just, it gives you confirmation to that sometimes people just say things just because I can't even tell you the amount of things that have been said about me on TikTok that are like just outright lies about me.

And then people are like, I also heard this. Did you? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Because they're looking for reasons. Yeah. And sometimes I've asked people like, where did you see that? Send it to me.

Yeah. And then they were like, well, if I'm being honest, I just heard somebody say it once in a comment section. and you just believe it like blindly. You're just like, that's okay, well, that's what I believe. And the only reason that happens is when you're already looking for a reason to like hate someone valid. And speaking on like the silence as well of like a lot of these hate videos about us get made because they want us to interact with them. I was just listening to you talk about how you can tell when somebody is like making a video to provoke you.

Yeah, absolutely. And so not giving them that platform. Yeah. And not, you know, pushing that sort of. because that's what they want. Yeah, sometimes I'll put them on another platform, and they hate that even more. Let's take you over here.

Yeah, because I'm still making the content that I need to bolster my audience, and then you don't get what you want, which is getting a stitch from me on TikTok. But I always think that never works out the way you think it's going to for me, especially if I stitch you on TikTok. All I do is flip your algorithm upside down, because then your comments outweigh your likes, and then your content gets suppressed.

So me stitching you does not result in you going viral. It's not a good thing for you, babe. Well, and also, what do you think is going to come out of that? You think you're going to get brand deals off being a terrible person? You know what I mean? They're like, get that guy in my office. This man's going to be selling lipstick. They're like, get that guy in my office.

I think I want him to promo my new Starface 100% hydrocholid pimple patch. That was good. Girl, they are not hiring you, okay? Like, when you're a terrible person online, no one's going to hire you to do anything like that. And that is what I will say about, I think, spreading joy online and why that has worked in my favor is because now brands and people do want to work with me

because they know when like you know they come into a space or a meeting with me or going to have me on the show like they know that I'm probably going to be a nice person and because sometimes I think when a platform is all because I mean some people on TikTok they really they're going wild with these stories

and it feels good to be doing the opposite at times. Yeah I agree I agree and it's validating to us because at the end of the day on a semi-serious note we're both good people we really are and we both we both have a greater purpose outside of just social media yeah i can't wait to see what you do for like a whole lot we got a lot okay that is the exhausting part of like of keeping this going and i was like because i i think of ellen a lot of the times like i would love to have a talk show one day i would love to you know do how she's kind of brought gay and lesbians onto the scene in the mainstream I would love to do that for trans people.

Yeah. And I was like, oh my God, isn't she in her 60s? Like, you're telling me I have to do this for another 40 years. Oh, side note, I'm 25. Okay. And do you ever, like, I kind of felt like on the older side of TikTok at some point, like we've been accepted by Gen Z, which is so great. Yeah. We're like on that cusp.

Yeah. But there's also this energy of just like keeping this going for so long. there is. It's it's the nature of social media. I think it evolves as we grow. But I think that's the key to us sustaining careers is that we build it outside of social media. So at this point, I think you and I are in a position where luckily we have fan bases that are so strong and so wonderful that they'll be willing to follow us into other forms of media, whatever that may be, which is a wonderful thing. I think that's a blessing. And I like that we didn't go viral at like 15. so that we had like a moment to like have real jobs and same same do all those things i said that all

the time it is weird though because like i get comments that are like or people will be like oh you're in your 30s or whatever when i'm like oh oh what's going on yeah same but i also get infantilized a lot and i was wondering for you because i think what happens with trans women is we're either infantilized or we're overly sexualized yeah like fetishized do you do you think like are your comments really like protect this woman at all costs or Are they more like, oh, babe, you look so hot right now? I never get those. Neither of those?

No, I talked to one of my guests. You're in the middle then. Yeah, I get more of, you're a fat bitch, I hope you die. But that's a little different. The vibes are a little different. But I do sometimes get men who... What about from your fans? From my fans, no.

They hype me up all the time. They don't see you as a child either. No, they've never... No, but they are shocked to find out how old I am sometimes. Sometimes they think I'm like, I don't know why, but sometimes people think I'm like 19, 18. Babe, with a lot of life experience

and a lot of confidence. Talking like a grown man. But hey, we'll take the, the skin will take the compliment. And I've said that when they meet me in real life, they realize how like large and in charge I am. Like, I'm a tall girl.

I'm a thick girl. So like, I've told people this. Like, I've told people, I'm six feet tall. So, like, sometimes people ask me. And my man is six, four. So, like, when they meet us both in person, they're like, you guys aren't like big people. which is um i think sometimes models are tall and that's hot and that's me yeah but that's like

another thing too i i think um sometimes though i'll have men who do sexualize me um in the same way that they typically sexualize minority women so out of hate yeah it's like it's like a hate thing but it's like a hate fetish thing like they'll say things like i mean like they all just have crushes like all those men that are making videos about you they just have big crushes on you. And it's like they'll say things like, they'll say the grossest thing ever. Like one dude made a video about me and he was talking about like,

can you imagine what, what that laugh sounds like in bed or something like that? Like I don't think I could ever. That's what I'm saying. I'm like, well, the beauty of that is you'll never have to worry about that bitch, will you? And second of all, get me out of your dreams.

I don't even want to be in the brain. Throw me in the trash. That just confirmed that they're thinking about you while laying in bed. Rip it right out of that brain stem. I don't want to be in the brain. imaginary field either. Sometimes they'll be like, I mean, I wouldn't say no, but I would, you know, I definitely wouldn't tell my friends if I hooked up with you. You wouldn't tell your friends, first of all, friends. What friends? I think that would be the biggest claim to fame that

this man ever had. I said, and I've literally told people I'm like, the, the meanest thing you could ever say to me is saying something to the effect of like, if you and I were together. Yuck. Yuck. Call me a fat buffalo back bitch. That's what I prefer. I prefer that. I prefer that. over you. But don't put that image in my mind. Yeah, but don't ever tell people if this were my girlfriend. Well, that's what I get. I get now with these straight guys is like they're so nervous to either like befriend me or even like interact with my content because they're nervous that like, it will say something about them. Yes. And like my favorite though is like I'll get a message from some straight man that makes a point to be like, hey Dylan, I'm a straight man. Thanks so much for

clarifying. Oh, thank God you told me. And then we'll be like really enjoyed watching your girlhood. series um you know take care bud or pal or friend and i'm like okay so you um you didn't have to put the pal or like let's let's not embarrasses bowl jerry yes and i'm like i understand you don't want to kiss me and you don't have to stress it at the end there but see don't they you know what i mean because they're thinking about it they felt so yeah and that's why i always think to when i it's the same thing when i it's not obviously not the same thing but it's in the same vein as like when i I post thirst trap pictures like glam picks and men will be like this isn't even heard. This is Photoshop.

Okay. Right. But I always say that made you mad that like that made you so angry that you had to comment that because you saw those pictures of me and your pee pee wiggled. And that upset you. Ooh. And that's on you, babe. And I've been thinking about too with these like straight guys in my content. Like there's that idea that if your boyfriend is transphobic or.

or homophobic or any of those things like run because like they really do hate women like they hate femininity that's what they're so scared of yeah and like this is like it could be a test like show a few girlhood videos to your boyfriend and see how he reacts because if he runs for the hills or has something bad to say like that could say a lot about him oh girl I tell them to show my videos too you should show both of our videos honestly that's the boyfriend test yes yeah show my videos show Dylan's video if they're cool with both. You'll learn more than going on vacation with the man. All right. That's all you need right there. First date as a matter of fact. We'll just link some videos. Honestly, just through the DMs. Send them both our links and see what they have to say. You don't

even have to go to DMs. You just do it on the Tinder app right there. Don't even meet up yet. That's a waste of time. I and I said that too because I say that like they don't have to love me. They don't have to think I'm the funniest person alive. But if they hate me, run. Immediately run. Same thing with Dylan. If they actively and viscerally hate me, they have a problem. And you know what's actually like a green flag is if they're like, oh, those are like some really lovely women.

Or I think the coolest straight guys, which I never even assume that they're trying to hook up me. Or like, oh, yeah, you look great today. Or like, you look pretty. Like,

they're so afraid to even compliment me because what, what does that mean to compliment a trans transphobia? Ooh. Don't I know it. Don't I know it. So you're like working on your own time. Yeah.

Not with me. And now we're spreading joy. Yeah. And I got to say, I was thinking about like the whole joy thing. Like I have become more joyful as a woman because, which I feel like it could have gone the other way because, you know, I had these quote unquote privileges of when I was a gay man. And I very much think that like even gay men can be mean. Like I was like a little mean as a gay man, believe it or not.

And now it's been, I think part of that that meanness and that anger that. that we see from haters is really being afraid of femininity. And it's like an unhappiness. Yes, I was unhappy with myself. So of course I had moments of like not being this person I am today online. And of course like I wasn't, you know, ready to be this joyful person. Yeah. But that is what feels really good is to like let that go and try to like step into

girlhood because I feel like I hear from women a lot specifically on their girlhood that it was really negative or that it's still negative. And they're still working through all this trauma. Yeah, absolutely. And the fact that I can start mine in a joyous place and try to make things as positive as possible, like, thinking about like, I truly am starting to get stretch marks on my butt.

And I like love them. I'm like, they're my new friends. And that's where I like, I do want to get us all to like a more positive place. Yeah, I agree. I mean, my approach is much different, but the outcome is positive. positive.

Yeah. And that's like two negatives make a positive. Amen. So I think for me, the positive always comes from the women and other people who message me and tell me how much my content has helped them or how much courage I've given them or how much strength I've given them just to like leave abusive relationships, right? Get divorced. I've had, I had someone in Mexico tell me that they wore a bathing suit for the first time.

on the beach. Like they were really nervous about going to Mexico and wearing a bathing suit. Like we ran into each other in Mexico. And she told me that she packed a bathing suit

because she's been watching me for almost a year now and she said she has so much confidence and you actually met her real life. And she was crying when she told me. Oh, that was a universe moment. Oh yeah. So special.

She was crying when she told me and that made me almost cry because we were both drunk. So it's important to mention. And we were at one of those bottomless. This is Euphoria Calvin Klein. The new Elixir Collection featuring three

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And so, like, that kind of stuff is what I hold on to. And what I think is so cool about that is it's not even what you're saying in your videos. It's just the fact that you're standing up to men. Yeah, exactly. That's what I tell people all the time. I think with what I'm realizing, too, with, like, my girlhood series, it's like less of what I'm even, what the content is. And it's more of the fact that every day I'm showing up and I'm trying new things. And I'm, like, trying to flip the script and show trans joy.

rather than trauma. Yeah. And that is like getting those messages of kids like coming out to me and me or parents being like, thank you so much. I just, you know, my kid came out to me and now we're watching your videos together. Like that is why we're doing it.

Exactly. I think that and it's the fact that like you said, we show up. Right. We show up and we show out and we have the courage to do it because. And it's still scary. Like I still every day going to make a video. I'm still like,

oh. Like there's still. It never really goes away. Yeah, the fear and the like, For anybody who wants to be an influencer out there, the fear never goes away. Yeah, truly, I did a Q&A recently and someone asked me,

what are some tips you want to give to someone who wants to be an influencer? And I told them, be absolutely certain this is what you want to do. Because it is not for everyone, and I promise you that to me. I'm like, please go learn the piano. I'm like just something.

Get a skill. Yeah, I'm like, babe, like some sort of land-yard crafty. Don't be a puppet like me. No. No, it's not for everyone. And I tell people that all the time, especially with what you and I do. Because obviously... We're not doing all the dances, which, babe, I kind of wish that was the brand.

Oh, the amount of times I'm like, I wish I was a beauty girl. Like, the amount of times I wish I was a fashion girl. I'm like, oh, oh, man. I'm getting wrinkles over here. It gets heavy. It gets heavy. Speaking on my transists, I'm exhausted. No, truly.

And having to prove, that's why I said to, like, the negativity is extra negative. for the two of us, obviously, in different ways, but it's extra, extra negative because it's people debating whether or not you're a good person, whether or not you're a valid person, whether or not you're worthy. That was, I think, the biggest part of this, too, was being confident enough to share my opinions for the first time

in a big way on a public platform. Because, again, like, I'm such a people-pleaser. I want to make everyone happy so that when I do say something that might be, like, you know, edgy in some capacity, it scares me. Yeah. So that's why it's like, we got to take big swings. We're like two opposite ends.

I know. You're like, we're the same coin. Yeah, we're the same coin, but I just like, balls to the wall, just do it. I let it all hang out and just do it. But that's like, it's the approach that we both have is necessary to what we're doing online, like to our presence online. Because I've said all the time, like, terrible men don't respond to niceness. They don't respond to kindness.

They don't respond to education. But they'll respond to these munchma jokes. I'll tell you that much. They're listening. They hate those jokes. I'll tell you that. That's the only, like I'm speaking your language.

That's how I get you to stop. Fire with fire, baby. And that's, and I've said that too. People are always like, fire with fire. It doesn't help anyone. And that's why I say,

according to who. You know, you're like, it goes out. It turns to ash. That's why I said according to who. Who's deciding whether or not it works. There is no rule book. Depends on your goals,

babe, the fuck up and it works magically okay so we're gonna go into some of these comments on this video um so one of these says yes flip the script i love this concept and am adopting it no more energy spent on those who don't deserve it i feel that unless you're talking about my job but i feel that if it makes you feel any better i don't want to expend the energy yeah if you got the energy expended yeah literally if you're tired girly don't silence it And I would argue, too, that me having a silly, goofy time with them is not me spending any energy at all. Me getting mad or getting upset is expending energy.

If you're, if you're like finding entertainment in it. Yeah. That's hot. That's what I was like. This next one says, thank you. I was advised by a so-called friend to treat being back sad with kindness. She's toxic and I avoid her with my silence. I feel that.

Sounds like a healthy friendship to end? Yeah. Capricorn. Ooh. Oh, wait. you think? I don't know, maybe. Oh, shit. He said cut him off. Dead to her. Sounds like Dylan Mulvaney.

Cut him off. I look and it's literally your handle that wrote that. It's okay. I know. You're like, this, uh, this comments from here. Actually. Okay. The funny part is, I think I preach so much positivity and yet my, my time, like my

for you page is all like just people like, I had, you know, he had my baby and then you know, her sister screwed him and then the mom, you know, I see those all the time. I love them. Right?

I eat it. I eat it up. Okay, back to the nice stuff. Okay, so this next video says it's basically a woman she's posing with text on the screen, but it says the term, don't fight hate with hate. Which is like, are you in my

comment section, girl? It's basically subtle gaslighting because it invalidates real injustices that we suffer. Being angry doesn't mean you're being hateful. It means you love yourself enough to get upset at your own mistreatment. which put it on my tombstone bitch at this point. My mind is like crickets right now.

I have no idea what you just said. It's basically when you get angry at people being hateful towards you. That doesn't make you a hateful person. It means that you love yourself enough to set up yourself. I wish I got angry and not like broke down into a puddle of tears in my canopy bed. Well, that's why you have me, babe. Now that's, we're about to flip the script. Yeah.

Absolutely. That's why I'm saying. Dylan, Dylan is such a softy and such a kind soul. And honestly, this is why I gravitate towards people like you, because I am such a menace when it comes to people being preyed on. Has this been your entire life? Like, were you on the playground and were you like somebody like, you know, took, like a bully took lunch money and you were like, hey, give that back.

I've done that many times. I can't even tell. That's not a joke. This is part of you. This isn't a new thing. No. And another thing, too, is my sister is older than me. And but we're two years apart and age, but we're one year apart in school.

So we were always in the same schooling. And my sister is such a sweet, kind person. Like she's so soft and like, okay, yeah, like, whatever you say, like, she's real, like, amenable in the sense that she just wants everyone to be happy at the time, right? So she would get whenever someone was even remotely mean to her, immediately, I got upset. And you were the little, like, you were the little sibling. Oh, yeah. I was the mean little sister. Put him up. Put them up. Yeah, literally, I remember my sister, she went through a period in school where she was coming home and she was hungry, right?

And my mom was like, why are you so hungry? Because we had free and reduced lunch or whatever at school. And my sister was like, well, my friend always tells me that she wants my lunch, so I just let her have it. And then my sister's like, we're young. We're super young. Okay, kindergarten. This, like, put yourself in my shoes. I'm like, I don't even know, four or five at this point.

I went into school early. my mom said I couldn't wait to go to school, which I think is the Virgo in me. But anyways, I digress. So my sister, my mom tells me the next day we get ready for school, she's like, I need you to find out who's taking your sister's lunch. And I said, you're, say less, which I'm on it. So I go and I find out who's taking it. And I tell her, give it back. Like I literally walked up, I said give that back to her immediately.

We never saw her again. No, and she tried to laugh and like make fun of us. And I remember this is one of the first, this one of the first times I ever. That's super ballsy. Yeah, this is one of the first times I ever compared anyone to anything now that I'm thinking about it, like actively, like to defend somebody else. This is the, the hero origin story. Yeah, truly. And then she told, she said something mean about my sister. And then I said, I said, give it back Stuart Little, because that's the first thing I could think of. And honestly, that's really, it's really, it's really short. Stuart Little had just come out. It was firing up the box office. And I was, and she was tiny. And I, when I was that small, I was still really big. I was tall. I was a big child.

Towering over this first grader. And she started crying and ran away. And then I got, I got in trouble, but then my mom defended me. Guaranteed she's like a follower of yours now, but he's never commented in the fear that like you're going to see her name and she's going to make a video about that.

I still remember her name. I won't say it. Hey, she got a shout out this many years later. So that's, I was just thinking of like. She probably doesn't even remember that, but I do.

And so does my sister. And I remember Jason was concerned. I was going to be in trouble. And I was like, I don't care. Right. Well, and you do it so effortlessly. Like, it just comes from you. And I was just sitting here like, okay, when I, when I get mad at people or if I like have a problem with someone, if I do get angry on the rare instance, it's like for good reason. And also I like plan. Like I, I'm not kidding. I had like a friend falling out situation. And I knew that she was going to call me eventually. And 12 months later, she did call. And I had a, I pulled up my notes app. And I had. And I had. I pulled up my notes app. And I had. everything I wanted to say to her. Do you have Virgo in your chart?

Yes, Virgo Moon. Look at that. But the Capricorn with getting the business stuff done, so I had to have it all written down. And I just, I thought, like, that's the way I work with if I get, because when I get angry or when I am offended by someone, I tend to get really emotional.

And so I need to, I know out of the moment what I want to say to them. And so sometimes having it really. written down can be really nice to access to be like okay now when I need to lay in with you like it's like when you practice in the shower you know your arguments really hard conversations yeah that's why I know you're I knew you had Virgo and you Virgo's are receipt keepers big time I love a receipt real me too real reticulous receipt keepers so they like keep everything they remember everything I feel like this is a running theory I have I feel like Burgos a lot of times have photographic memory so they remember almost to the fiber of like what was on your jackets like how the situation

happened. Yeah, that that is, I do that sometimes. I'm so particular about things. Same. That I think I love to analyze every detail. Same. That's Virgo, babe. And you're Virgo Moon, so that's your emotion. Okay, so we kind of like canceled out this like Capricorn negativity that you had earlier. Saved you with the Marup. I felt threatened on the show. Yeah. And literally on here, when it says like when you respond i've talked about this already but like when you respond to disrespect in whatever way you see fit i like i'm not going to tone police how somebody decides to react to open disrespect i was like you're forgetting because sometimes dudes will be like you're an adult you be one too then right you started it but you can't finish it and that's the problem

well i have literally never like i've never intentionally ever started anything online before And that's what's crazy. Like people are out here multiple times a day starting things. And they just like when they see my videos and they get upset, they just close their eyes the first half of the video, like the first 15 seconds when I include what they said. And then they only open them when I'm talking. Yep. And they're like, that was just so mean.

That was so mean of you. And I always say, I made a video about this yesterday. And I literally said on there, what gives you the right? Like what makes you think it's up to you, how I react to disrespect. to misogyny, to bigotry of any kind. Why is that up to you? And then I was like, unpack it. You're right there.

Let's work through some trauma. Why do you think that that's up to you? Why it's supremacy? Because all of these people should be in therapy and they're not. Yeah, amen. Amen to that. And then some of the comments on these videos, like it says, I kind of needed to hear this.

I always feel guilty for being angry or mean to bigoted people because I was told to be nice to everyone no matter what. And that's misogyny, Ben. It's pushing you down. It constantly makes women feel like they need to be the bigger, person, they need to be kind and respectful and patient. And coming back to the video, like this being such a positive video on TikTok, those are the ones I'm like kind of embarrassed to enjoy or like, like, those are the ones that

I'm like saving on, you know, like my Instagram, like save folder. Or it's like the, you know, the poetry that's like really impactful. Yeah. We're like, I'm sometimes even nervous to like like like it because it's like, you're like, they'll see it. People are going to see it. And also like there's something about self help that still sometimes is like a little, like there's a stigma of like.

oh, this is preachy or like this feels like MLM. Like it makes you feel good. Yeah. Like when you see it's like life advisors, any kind of help. Yeah, but we need more of that on TikTok. I agree. And I think it's, I think it's free game if you're going to be awful to somebody. It's free game at that point.

Right. You just give me the green light. That's why I said like, as soon as you tell me it's ready, let's go, then let's go. So that's why I'm like, how come only you're allowed to joke? Right. I don't get to join in on the silly goose. goofy time. And I just wonder like as we get older, how will this like will it get quieter from their side or will it just continue? I feel like the only reason it does continue is because new people

join just like how you're saying a new fresh batch of people find you and then it's like. Or they're teaching their kids something that then their kids grow up to say those same things. Yeah. Hate is is taught. It's not it's not ingrained in us. But you know what is ingrained in us? Patriarchy, racism, homophobia, transphobia. But it's up to us. unlearn it, right? We take the necessary steps. You and I are both adults. We're halfway to 30. Yeah. So we're well into our 20s. So it's on us to unpack and understand why we can't laugh at certain things, say some things, why it's important to like know the difference. And getting resources like that aren't on the internet or on TikTok because I feel like so much of like even like people are

getting diagnosed with things from an app. And that's like super dangerous. And so I think learning how to unpack all this trauma shouldn't just happen online. I agree. I think that's a huge reason why I'm such a proponent of secondary education. So college of any kind, whatever it may be, whether it's like a trade school or maybe you go backpacking in Europe or whatever. Yeah. Like I think especially in college, because that's what I can speak to, you meet people from all different walks of life and you learn a lot more about yourself and you learn more about your impact and the intention you should have going on to the world, how to be a better person. Oh my God. You're the president of the United States right now. It's true, though. That's how you learn. You interact and engage and befriend and maybe even

fall in love with people that you never thought you would. Right. And I do feel like a lot of the people that you have to end up stitching are these like millennial men or even older. Yeah. And hopefully it's like with Gen Z, I'm like, baby, babies, please. Yeah. Yeah. You know, don't do this to us. Yeah. But it'll just, yeah, I'm really, I am hopeful for the future. Me too. And that. And I think that's it I think it's a wonderful thing that that they have people like us too so what would your advice be for someone like me who's a creator online that's like super submissive and like what would you recommend me do for like when the hate comes like how do you how have you always found this confidence in yourself I would say for people like yourself who are more on the demure side so you kind

to like take it and then you you're upset about it internally but you don't want to rock the boat yeah you just it's not that you don't know how you just aren't used to doing it and that's what i tell people all the time because i always tell them to work up to it right so start small so if you're someone like yourself i know if they get your order wrong you don't correct them if they call you the wrong name you don't correct them like you just kind of let it slide because you're like well it's not that serious and it isn't but it is to an extent because it speaks to a larger issue which is you feel like you're not important enough to be respected even in the smallest of ways right whether it's your name correct whether it's your your pronouns right whether it's um your just gender identity in

general yeah and i think because or your starbucks order right and sometimes i think because i i want to listen to everyone and really value what everyone has to say that when it is bad about me or when someone is like being transphobic towards me. I'm like, well, I guess they have a right to like say those things because, you know, it's. You know, that's the thing is you have the right to say things. Your right to freedom of speech is not freedom from consequence. So everything has, you know. Have you, this is crazy, but like, have you ever had people like lose their jobs because of like what you were doing or like get?

I honestly don't know. I don't think so. I know that some dudes have like, some dudes make shit up, but some of them are like, well, people were calling my work. And I'm like, well, why did you post this? Babe, like, you brought this upon yourself. But I had one moment where towards the beginning of my days of girlhood series on Instagram, I was getting a lot of like death threats. And usually for men. And it got to like, I don't usually post people.

We were like post people's names. Yeah. But I did. I just like posted this, this comment. It was so horrible about like somebody's wanting like kill me in my sleep or something. Yeah. And these people, this would, man, I looked up this little town in Australia, like in the, in the bush. Something about the men.

In the Australian bush. The men in Australia. Ooh. What's going on over there? Misogyny. Get it. 50-50 if my zippers up or down anymore. Take my pants off at home.

They come off easy. I'm like, I thought it was four hours I was walking around like. Netflix is a joke presents. Nate Bargatsy Big Dumb Eyes World Tour. A special live taping at Into a Dome. I think it's because I'm peeing so much longer. I watch young people come and go. I'm like, tell my family I'm okay.

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But these people managed to like get this man fired from his job in Australia and I had this intense guilt. And I don't even know what the job was. Like I just couldn't believe that like me reposting something had that effect. And it really was like at first I was filled with regret because I was like, oh my God, this poor man lost a job. And then I was like, oh my God, Dylan, he was threatening to kill you. Yeah.

And although like, babe, that's a, that's a hard flight to, you know. Yeah. That's a pretty penny. I'll see you in two weeks. Yeah. Thank you. It's going to get a party guard by then. No, truly.

But I did think I was like, oh, that's that happened. Like that was the universe's plan. Like in that, you know, I don't. need to lose sleep over that at night? No, not at all. And hopefully it was a learning lesson for everyone. Yeah, freedom of speech does not mean freedom of consequence. And that's what I've said countless times. Like, and you have to think too, whenever we post these things, we don't tell people like, go harass them, go get them fired, go, this is where they live. This is where they are ready. I make fun of you as a person and that's it. Anything that happens after that, I have no

control over. But I'll tell you this. Am I supposed to to weep because you called me a fat buffalo bitch and then I posted your thing online and then you got a raz and then maybe got in trouble from your school I'm supposed to feel bad for you no I don't I immediately don't and I think too to speak to the other point about how the younger generation is learning a lot more especially when they have creators like you and I there's also a certain amount of privilege in being raised in this generation now as Gen Z because you and I in our generation, we did not have access to the education that they have now. So that being said, there are sometimes where there are things you used to laugh at,

there are things you used to say, there are things you used to do that are no longer funny. And only millennials and older can relate to that. Right. Because sometimes Gen Z people hold you to such a stark standard, especially you and I, because we have very specific platforms. Because they're like, oh, well, how could you ever? laugh at that. How could you ever joke about that when you were 15, 16 years old? I didn't have the access that you did. Oh, my God. We had horrible role models. Oh, the way the things we used to

joke about. Like for trans people like on TV, it was just like law and order victims, you know? Yeah. Or they were making fun of them on like things like friends, right? Like they have a bunch of jokes about about trans people too. And partly why I took so long to even because I was non-binary for like a year. And then why I was so scared to take on that trans, woman title because I didn't even know the steps of what like how to do this so that's why I was like oh I'll start a day one and now I'm like oh babe that was uh taxing experience we're in the think of it I'm sure don't know if I would recommend other trans people to do what I'm doing oh my but just to protect yourselves because I think that this is such a personal journey personal journey yeah

but I am just so excited to like have this new generation have access to people like us and And that's what I want there to be more people like us. Same. I agree. With what content's being made, especially for like millennials creating content, I think we're so afraid of like being cringe. Yeah. That, you know, people don't, they just choose not to make anything at all.

Yeah. And yes, a lot of like millennial humor is like very cringe. But sometimes like being real and authentic and like putting yourself out there. Yeah. Can really pay off. I agree. You don't know how many people you're actually helping. I think that all the time too.

when people ask me, I want to make content, but I'm afraid of like the backlash of hate, whatever it may be. Yeah. I always tell them you got to make the content for you. That's the most important part. Well, in a lot of these videos that I make are like little diary entries that mostly what I'm excited about is to look back, you know, so many years from now or have my kids be able to watch these videos and be like, oh, wow, look at our mom and date.

And that's where joy comes from. It's like, I think that even TikTok in what can be such a hateful place is making it for you. And once it's out there, having it be, because it can be a free for all. Oh, absolutely. Maybe we know it's a circus out there. Yeah. I think having it be for you and be something that started with joy so that you can hopefully hold on to that for as long as possible. I agree.

I think that's, it's a universal feeling for all creators who grow, not just like on TikTok, but like they explode like you and I did like I was a pretty steady growth for a while and then it just like exploded into another universe and that's how yours was too so we never asked to do this we never thought we were going to do this but now that we are I like know and I'm sure you feel the same way that this is like my true purpose in life like this is what I was always meant to do I was so scared of like what the term influencer meant like that made me like that was cringy word for me yeah it is it's a cringe word we know okay We're well aware.

But now, like, there is, like, true power in that. There is. And I think it's a wonderful thing. And you know what? I always say, too, like, I'm so grateful to the younger generation. Look at us. And are these, like, like, Cosmo and Wanda outfits? I know.

Look at us. They ain't slick. This is to the younger jet. Like, we're addressing the nation. I'm so, I'm grateful to them because they've taught me a lot. Oh, my God. I'm their biggest fans. Yeah.

They've taught me a lot. They inspire me. Like, and they make me helpful. Do you consider yourself, Genzi, or millennial? We're millennial. Okay. Especially me. I'm older than you. So yeah. That's the weirdest part is like, thank you for claiming us as your own.

Yes. But we are old. Old grandpas. I'm an old grandpa. And I'm a grandmother. There you go. Your grandpa and your grandma. That's the two of us. I'm like, that's why sometimes they say like that, oh my God, girl, like that Nick Jonas, TikTok I was telling you about the millennial humor one. Okay, that's the bad, the cringe of millennial humor. All love, all peace, but that video was hard to watch. And I feel like you and I are more of a pure form of millennial.

And then below us, obviously, is Gen Z. So I think that, I think we're okay, okay? We're all right. But sometimes when you tell people you're a millennial. Yeah, they say cool beans and, you know, things like that, like makes me real nervous to be around. So, yeah, maybe take a few notes before the content creation from the Gen Ziers. Yeah, that's what I'm doing. That's how I feel, oh my gosh, I never feel any more millennial than when I do transition videos.

Oh. Oh, girl. The amount of times I film them, I'm like, oh, this is so embarrassing. If anyone watched me do this, I would die. I have no idea. That's why I just talked to the camera and I slap on some captions. That's why so many of mine are talking to the camera. And then with the few times I do, do transitions. I will say like, but it's funny for us too, like coming from a world where we were normal people and then now being in all these like glam spaces. Yeah. And like it's pretty surreal. Yeah. It's so fun to be able to be like, oh, I'm going to make a transition

video because I got my hair and makeup professionally done. And that's exciting. Same. That's what I'm saying. I'm like, just let me be an oldie, okay? Let me be your Facebook mom. I don't want to talk about it. Who are some of your favorite, like, positive people on TikTok? Mama Tots a great one. Oh, Mama Tott, we love you.

She's a great one. And she's in the comments. Oh, yeah. She's in those comments. Professional. And I got so excited. Michaela, too, makeup by Michaela. Oh, I love Michaela. So much fun.

And I think that was like you and her were my favorite like like mutuals like to have follow me back. I love. Because it really does. I think the more people like that on there just sharing their stories and being vulnerable. And, and, you know, Mama Tots going through a lot right now. And yet she is so strong and so confident. And she's still showing up. She's still showing up for everyone for her audience.

And still managing to find joy. Yeah. And I've even seen recently. like people are trying to take her down when she has been able to find joy in this really tough time for her and I think how evil is that how evil is that

if you are trying to strip someone of their joy of what little joy they have in this like storm they're going through yeah truly you're a bad person I adore her I've loved her for so long so like I followed her forever same with Michaela I she is so funny I adore her I trust her with my life. With makeup.

Like, I'm like, well, I gotta go buy it. Any makeup video she makes, I'm watching every second of that shit. Can I do it? No. I'm so. But I'm invested. Same. Every second I'm watching.

I'm like, uh-huh. Like, it's going to change my makeup routine. Right? But I'm just watched. I'm so invested. She has me hooked. Yeah. And I think, you know, this women is what it all has in common.

I feel like, you know, we very rarely see like male influencers trying to make a very positive impact. I feel like it's so much clout chasing. It's so much, you know, trends and all, you know, just trying to stay relevant or stoking the drama. I love how men love to pretend how much they hate drama when they're the ones that started.

Men are the most dramatic people. They are. They really are. Bitch get a theater degree. That's why I said they're like, you don't think men are, they're like, women are so dramatic. I'm like, just take a scroll through my comment section, just for a day. Just go ahead and look through there and see what men are really like. Yeah, I've watched a man's stuff,

his toe. Oh my God. When they get a cold? Um, the end of the world, bitch. But that it does, there is something about femininity and joy and

yeah, being in tandem. And I think the moment men separate the like gender identity of being a woman with the idea, the idea of femininity. Yeah. The qualities of femininity. Yeah.

And knowing that they can tap into it and access it. Yeah. Yeah. Babe, this world. Yeah. Gonna be rocked. Yeah. Because even like,

like straight feminine men. Yeah. Some of the hottest men in the entire world. I mean, the Harry styles of it all with the... I saw, and you know what? I saw a trend going around and I only saw it because unfortunately for me, I'm tagged in the worst things ever on TikTok.

And it was literally like big Jimbrough type dudes saying things like, if you ever feel bad about yourself, just remember this is her crush. And they're like putting that picture of Harry Styles when he dressed up as Dorothy for his Halloween. The hottest thing I've ever seen. But then I think to myself, I'm like, that's what shakes.

you a man in a dress like honestly give up like if that's the scariest thing you've ever seen life is way too hard. Amen. And a lot of those men are on Grindr right now and they're looking for. And you know what I think too? I just think like I personally, I'm too busy. I don't have the bandwidth. I don't have the emotional capacity to get that upset over shit that doesn't affect me.

Literally at all. It doesn't hurt me, doesn't touch me. I like, I have no capacity for it. I don't have room. And I think that even the things that we're witnessing online with negativity, like, that applies to our real life relationships. Yeah. I know that, like, I haven't dated anyone in years.

Can't wait. Who's out there? And I think with the negativity that we're, like, seeing online, it directly applies to our lives as well. Because, like, I know that when I go into entering a relationship, which I haven't dated anyone in years, if anybody's out there. Hello. Dylan single.

Woohoo. my boobs are getting big it's awesome love that but um i i just think that i will if they're triggered by my feminine joy or if they're you know pushing back with pessimism i know that that's that's their own trauma i know that's not me and i also know right away that they're not getting a second date absolutely and that's another thing it speaks to misogyny as a whole right and that's another reason why things that are universally loved by women are typically shit on on in all capacities. Like anything that's loved by women,

anything that's cherished by them, whether it's boy bands, second rate singers. Yeah, they're like, oh, that's so lame, that's so corny, and it's literally only because it's loved by women. I have a question for you. Sure. With your current relationship, so cute and I love everything you post. Thank you.

Do you see how great men can be? Is he living an example of like because you don't have to have those conversations with him because you're like having them online and like does it make you value your relationship even more? Yes, uh, it definitely does.

It's mostly because my boyfriend, um, and I are like on the same page morally. That's why when people say like what's like the first red flags you look for. So a man can't have the same morals as a woman. Yeah. It's very possible. And you know it's funny.

You know it's funny too. It's like I got I um somebody another creator actually asked me this question and they asked me if I had to teach him anything as far as like being open being receptive like learning growing all that kind of stuff and I said no I did not believe it or not I didn't have to teach him to respect other people who may live in a different life than they than he does like I believe it or not I didn't have to convince him on his own yeah on his own accord on his own free will parents that were willing to teach him that yeah and he and he and he and he and he and he and he and And he taught a lot to his own family.

And he's taught me a lot. Like I literally, have you ever heard of the classroom example? No. Okay. So in sociology, I don't know if it's all around, but he was a sociology major in college. So there's like a classroom example when it comes to the idea of oppression. So at the very front of the classroom is cis straight white men. So they can't see any oppression because it's all behind them.

We're all facing the same way. Right. Right behind them are cis straight women, white women. Right. Right. behind them are just gay white women, right behind them, and so on and so forth. At the very back of the classroom is black, trans women, right? And so you can only see what's in front of you.

When you're born into this world, you can only see the oppression that's in front of you. That's why a lot of times they talk about the, they criticize white feminism because it doesn't include anyone else. It's not intersectional and its very nature. It doesn't include trans women. It doesn't include disabled women. It doesn't include black women, women of color. Right.

So as the classroom goes further back, the people at the people at the, the very back of the classroom can see all of the oppression in front of them. So it's very obvious to them. Or you have to make an effort to like walk yourself to the back of the classroom. So you have to make an effort to turn around. Yeah. And look behind you and see who's behind you and who you can help. He taught me that.

So I told my, I told my friend that and she was all, damn, bitch. Must be nice. Yeah. And also like I think the work that you're doing online, like I think it would be even harder to do if you didn't have that example in your life of like a partner that you know like imagine if you were doing this as a single girl being like wow these are all like because as a single girl i'm like wow i really got a lot of men to look forward to in this life

and it's you know what's you know what's even even more ironic and also kind of terrible is that me having a relationship with a cis heterosexual man um who's the idea of masculinity right to these terrible men gives me more credibility to them that's the irony is like it's the same concept like when we go out if I get hit on and he's with me. You did a field study. Yeah. If I get hit on and he's with me or they see him after the fact, they apologize to him. Well, there's some burgo in you right there because you've got, you've got the receipts of like this amazing man. What's his name? Billy. Thank you, Billy. I can't wait to meet you. And I know I talk to him all the time about you. Really? Yeah. I was just telling him last night how much I'm so excited.

So you could come over well girls in my house. I got lots of wine. Oh, my, I'm a red. I'm a red girl. Red girl? Oh, I'm a white girl. Oh, love. Look at us. Now that's the different sides of the coin. Spreading love. Spreading love through red and white wine. Okay, so I think that's all for today. I do want to say, though, I want to ask Dylan, like, what would you say is something that you want people to take away from, whether it's your platform or just the idea of what it means to spread love on the internet or just in general in life?

What would you want people to take away? that it is so much it is actually easier to spread joy than it is to spread hate and i know it can be sometimes when we get anxiety and depression built up i think that it then can become such an effort to spread joy but once you break through those things yeah um it can it can it can reignite you and and i think that i know it's so silly to say but like if you don't have something nice to say don't say it at all like sometimes it's like it it really we don't have to be horrible to each other. Yeah, exactly.

And I just hope that we can, like, even if you have opinions about me or Drew that you don't necessarily like love or, you know, we aren't your cup of tea. Yeah. Babe, talk about it at brunch with your girlies. Like, like roast us in the DMs. Yeah, I just, I don't need to see it. Yeah, I don't need to know. Yeah.

That's your business. That's your opinion. Yeah. Because we have feelings. and we're real humans that didn't expect this to happen for us. And we didn't choose us. Right. And if we're going to continue with this, like, I can't deal with all the hate.

Yeah. And it's, if you think about it, it's not natural. No. Like nobody, nobody who works a regular 9 to 5 job, whether it's retail food service or like corporate, nobody has to deal with people watching them through a one-way mirror and saying all the most horrible shit so you can hear them, but you can't see them. Nobody has to deal with that. We're the only people who have to deal with that.

So it's a beautiful thing and the good far outweighs the bad. But the bad is very bad. And that's why we talk about, like, we spread joy and love in very different ways. But for me, it's something where my joy comes from women and others getting strength from me and drawing from me and using me as almost like a talisman when they want to stand up for the. themselves and that's that's joyous that kindle so much joy for me marie kondo bitch oh i am so excited and i think the other part of it is like we spend so much time online our jobs are online yeah finding the joy outside of it because even if you're going to ticot to find your joy or your hate um that's a problem yeah because it has to happen elsewhere and then whatever content comes across your for you page like

so be it yeah but it's it's the outside that matters like go pet so you animals. Oh my God. Animals change the game. When I got my dog, oh, when I got my dog, it changed the game for me. I gotta get some animals. Something about an animal in the house, like another living thing who like has no brain cells outside of you. Like my dog is so like, my dog knows nothing except food and peeing on my beanbag chair. That's all he knows. That's all he cares about. But that dog doesn't have hate in his heart. Not at all. And I wish sometimes I'm like,

you want to switch lives with me? Let's switch places. you and I. Yeah, that sounds really. What I would give to be my dog squid for a day. Oh, my God. Anyways, I will say this, though, if you're someone who thinks that I'm a hateful person, whatever, I challenge you, right, to let go of the patriarchy, let go of misogyny. This goes for women and men and everyone in between.

It releases you. When you release that need. And that's what, hey, this is what I want for you. Yeah. I want you to stop late. Like, I never. want you to think of what you're doing is hateful or negative. And when we speak on it, I don't want you to put yourself in that category because at the end of the day, we're actually in the same category.

Love. And so we need to be watching out for each other. And when you're consuming content, really see what content creators are actually doing behind their words and what the, you know, you making people confident enough to wear bikinis or me making people confident to come out. like that's the essence of what we're doing yeah absolutely and you know what i would say we're doing a pretty damn good job bitch whew cheers it looks like it's paying off so thank you all for joining us for this episode of the comment section today thank you so much to my guests the beautiful wonderful dylan where can everybody find you babe you know instagram tick talk uh we got a book in the works baby love it's going to be wild but i love you and what are your handles oh at dylan mow vaney

We love it. Thank you so much for joining us today. Will you say love you with me? Oh yeah. One, two, three. Love ya. I've always wanted to do that with you. Oh my God, I love that. Thank you so much for joining us for this episode of the comment section.

If you enjoyed it, please make sure you subscribe to the past your bedtime YouTube channel. New episodes drop every Wednesday. And you can also stream it on all streaming platforms, Spotify, Apple Music, Amazon, wherever bitch, you know where to find me. Thank you all so much for joining me. I'll see you next week. Bye.