The Comment Section with Drew Afualo - POST-TOUR ZOOMIES Ft. Ravyn Lenae | Episode 144

Episode Date: November 13, 2024

This week, Drew sits down with the talented singer-songwriter Ravyn Lenae for an unfiltered discussion on the misconceptions terrible men hold about modern women. Ravyn opens up about her journey—balancing artistry with the demands of the music business, the road to fame and how having a strong support system is crucial for young women navigating the industry. Together, they bond over having a loyal gay fanbase, similar tour experiences, not liking to cook and so much more! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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in leading traditional coffee creamers. Two Good Creamers are available in sweet cream, roasted vanilla, and lavender. So which one are you trying first? find two good creamers at your local retailer in the creamer aisle. He made like a bunch of transphobic comments too. How did that get slip in? Girl, I don't know. I said, huh?

Like, I don't know. What the fuck? You're talking about the World Series? And how did you get there? Hey, everyone, and welcome back to another episode of the comments section show. Sorry, me, your favorite. Everybody knows me. Who cares about me?

On to the guest. Today, we have the iconic, the legendary, the amazingly talented Raven Lanay. Welcome to the show, Ms. Raven. Thank you, love. I'm happy to be here. Oh my gosh, I'm happy to have you. It's an honor and a privilege. How have you been?

How's life? I'm doing good. I just got off tour. So I've been thinking about all the things I've been wanting to eat on tour and I've been eating them. Oh, nice. So it's been a good few days. How was tour?

Your tour looked like it was, it's kind of spread out a little bit, huh? Yeah. So we did the U.S. dates, which I just ended about a week or so ago. Nice. And then I go to Europe in a few days. And are you excited for that? I am. I just don't want it to be too cold.

That's the only thing I worry about. I know in the winter, huh? Like, start of winter. How was tour? Do you like touring? I think of a Michael Jackson meme. Have you seen that? Which one? When he's like, I love to tour. He really hates to. But they made him say it.

You're right, you're right. Actually, I have seen that one. Yeah. I'm with you. I do. I feel like one of the best parts of making music is getting to see the people who love it in real life. Totally. And see how the people. the lyric stick and there's real people behind streams and comments and likes you know who really sit with the music so I think I'm just always so shocked whenever I see people show up yeah really know the songs and are crying yeah so I'm like so fired up to see exactly I'm honestly

that's so tea and I'm with you because obviously I'm not an amazingly talented like singer or a musician which I think their touring is probably a lot harder I just like I'm a dickhead online so So I went on a book tour this summer for a month and did 22 cities of U.S. I hate touring. Really? What about it? I just told everyone I felt like I was living on the run. Yeah.

Like it's just, it's a lot of me like wiping shit down and change just in there long enough to shower and then leave. Yep. And wipe on my fingerprints off everything. That's how it's. I felt like Jason Bourne. That's literally what it is. It's horrible. And you get too good at packing up.

Right. Like my record time. Like five minutes. And that's including brushing my teeth. Right. Exactly. That's not normal. Yeah.

Did you do a tour bus or did you fly? I did a sprinter. And then I flew sometimes. Okay. Cool. Okay. But yeah, it was a good one. I think this is one of my favorite ones,

mainly because the group and my friend of Rima opened for me. So just having another woman on tour I think made a big difference for me. My family, my mom and my sister. Love. always try to catch some shows. So they call a majority of this tour. Yeah. I get that.

I totally get that. And you know what's funny is I felt the same way you did where like performing was the best part of the world. It's everything in between. That's awful. I don't think people even realize or think about. Right. You know, like something that's basic as eating.

Right. Getting exercise, stretching. Right. Sleeping. Like all those little things that make you like a person. Like a normal human. Yeah. And able to function.

Exactly. I can't even imagine doing what you do too because like singing for that much like that long duration of time, the show itself and then also multiple days in a row. Yeah. I'm sure is extremely taxing. Yeah. What's your kind of like vibe on tour as far as taking care of your voice and your body? That's something with each tour I feel like I'm getting a better handle of like with this one. I tried to make sure I ate well and not waiting to the last minute and having it sit in the Burger King drive.

Right, right. That's happened in the past. So just, like, being proactive about those things, making sure I'm getting the most sleep I can. Also, just for, like, mental health reasons, like, telling my mom, like, I really would like you to be here and not being scared of that or, you know. Totally. You're so me.

Yeah. I did this. I brought almost my entire family on tour. I brought my fiancé, brought my mom, my dad, my sister. That is so sweet. Who else? Yeah. Like, I brought my entire team, everybody.

I was like, I need everyone there to like, literally I felt like how Sally from the nightmare before Christmas looks. By the end of tour, stitched together. Yeah, that's what it feels like. Right, held together by prayer and a whim. That's all that's holding me together at that point. Yeah. But I love that you're getting more of a, like a feel for what you like. Yeah, totally.

And I know you came out with an album earlier this year, sophomore album. Yes. Yes, love that. How has the reception been? How has it been? And obviously, I'm assuming the music you're touring. Yeah. So I actually play the entire album, and this is the first album of mine where I play the entire thing, front to back.

See? I feel like this music brought out a different part of me as far as what I bring on stage and what I want to leave people with. So it can be something that's subtle as not feeling like I have to move around the stage the entire time and feeling confident in the songs and the lyrics and being able to just hold the mic. here and just stay there and sing. Yeah. So those subtle things that I think people really picked up on in my like development on stage, I think is something that I want to start to really curate and think about with every album.

Love. So it's been good. Also seeing what songs people like. It's always the ones you think like, oh, this is my favorite, but they're not going like this. Yeah, they're going to like more of the other kinds of like singles. And they're eating them all up. They're eating like the deep.

The ones that I thought were like, this is for me. Like they're not going to like this. I don't care if you like it, but I'm putting it on that. Exactly. I feel you. You got to have at least one. One. This one's for me.

This one's just for me. And if everyone likes it, cool. Exactly. That's cool. I love that. And you have some crazy features on this album. What's it been like working with some of the artists you've worked with? Childish Gambino, Steve Lacey.

How has that been? Childish Gambino has been someone I've always wanted to work with. So the fact that it happened. So naturally and him being so interested in the story around the song he's on. was something really special for me. I bet. Because I could just tell that he cares about nailing it and making sure it feels true and right for the song and for me.

So working with him was a dream. I would love to keep working with him. Ty is incredible. He brought something to the song that I think it really needed. And literally that's the verse that people scream at the show. Love that. Tea? Yeah.

So filling that in person. Yeah. Just seeing how these songs really move throughout the world and through people is everything to me. It makes everything else around touring worth it. Yeah, right. You're like, okay, well, this one thing. All right, I'll keep going. Exactly.

So I'm very, I'm familiar with your lore. For those that aren't, though, how did you get into music? What did you, like, what kind of drew you to it initially? Is this what you always wanted to do? Is it kind of something that you're like, you know what? I've found this medium I'm going to write it. So like, what's that journey like for you? I think from very early on, I knew that I wanted to be in music, entertainment, around it in any way I possibly could.

I knew I loved watching artists perform on TV, seeing their video. Something about it just felt. It was calling to you. Yeah. Something about it felt like, oh, like what they're doing is living in the world in a way that lives on beyond them. I don't know if I thought that it's three. you're old but something about it just felt um like i wanted to be a part of it yeah and then being around music growing out like my dad would show me different artists and play

different music and just seeing how it moved him um my mom i just feel like songs and music albums live with us through like each section of our life and i think that's so special that we can like associate different periods and different times and emotions and heartbreak and just different moments. Yeah, and life are like they can be earmarked by music. Exactly. Like certain songs or albums? Exactly.

That's very true, yeah. So that's something that I think that I wanted to be a part of. Totally. My family recognized that in me early. So my grandmother put me in guitar lessons and then piano lessons. Love. And then that's when I started to sing during piano lessons. And I was like, ooh, I like this.

Oh, that's cool. Okay. So they noticed your. musicality and then that's kind of how you found that you could sing too exactly well I love that yeah I wish I wish I woke up and I was like I'm an amazing singer everybody can do just you guys practice I know everybody tells me that every time I have lots of friends who are singers and artists and they're like I bet if you practice I bet you could literally it's just a muscle I mean I'm sure I feel like the ones like you or my friends who are also famous artists too like yeah God given talent yeah like just given to like you

like you just woke up like you know what I'm saying yeah there's like certain things feel like you can't teach. Yeah. Because you're just born with it, which I love and admire. And you're one of them. Must be fucking nice. Whatever. I told us, I got hit with a funny stick and he said, that's good enough.

Send that bitch down. Good enough. Good enough. She's going to be funny for a living. And T, look at us. We're living in our purpose. We're walking our purpose. Exactly.

See? Okay. So I know the original music that you released was unsigned and then it was once you did get signed. So how did that process come about? with getting signed. Yeah, so I was, honestly, so I met Monty Booker in Chicago when I was around 15. And that's when I started to make my own music and with him.

I kind of figured out what my style was and what I wanted to put out. So we put that out on SoundCloud. I didn't think anything of it. I was just, I just wanted to put music online. But then people really started to gravitate towards it in Chicago. I liked it and labels were calling. It honestly happened really quickly. And me being 15 at the time,

I don't think I got the full scope of what all of that meant and what that type of attention meant and how to go about it. So it's kind of a blur, like when I look back on it. Yeah, so I signed and then I put out my moon shoes EP. And from there is when I started. It just kind of started snowballing from there. And how has that adjustment been?

Like that's one thing I love to ask my artist friends is like how it's been adjusting to being seen by so many people and your art being consumed by so many people. Like how has that adjustment been for you and how do you feel now versus how you felt when you first started? I think it's a very different thing when you're releasing music at 15 with no other opinions. You're not even thinking about making money from something like this. Totally. So then like you put on like almost like a business hat after your stuff. and like things become very logistical and numerical. And I think with that,

sometimes you can get caught up in what all those things mean and still being young and wanting to put out things that feel good for you without the thought of, okay, wait, now I have rent, now I'm 18. Yeah, like it has to do well. Yeah, absolutely. So I think that was the major shift for me of like this pressure of performance.

Yeah. And that translates also through persona. and online engagement, all of that. Yeah, it all plays a role now especially. Exactly. But not so much when you first came into the world. I don't even like this wasn't even that long ago. Yeah.

But when I dropped, but when I dropped it on SoundCloud, I don't even remember having like a posting schedule or people posting really on Instagram about music. Yeah, totally. Like it was just a completely different landscape. So things are just changing quick and we just got to like keep up. I know.

I know. That's true. that's actually such a good point. I feel like to be, and that, honestly, you sound like a true artist. Like, it's like the whole reason is to make the art. It's not, it wasn't for anything. And now it's like you have to have both. Right.

Like, you have to still be in that place where you can feel inspired and create your art, but also keep in the back of your mind that, you know, numbers. That's hard to do. Yeah, I was going to say, how has that been kind of blending those two or like kind of keeping a good balance? Because obviously you want to do well. Of course. But at the same time, you don't want to compromise the art either for the sake of doing.

well. So how has that been? I think, especially with this album, I was reminded of, like, the more the logistical part of my brain comes into play, the more I kind of get away from, like, the reason I make music in the first place. And I think people can feel that. I think they can because even with putting out my song, One Wish, which is like my best performance song to date. that's such a deeply personal song that I never thought would really resonate in the way it has. So that to me was a reminder of like, okay, like these things that live in me is the reason why people come to shows and they got attached to the music in the first place. So it's okay to, you know, think as like a businesswoman or think about my future, but also trying to figure out that balance of like making.

sure the music still feels like me and offensive. True to you. Yeah. And what you want to put out. Not necessarily what you know will chart, which I feel like most artists know. Yeah. Like you know what will chart like immediately. And then artists also know what they really want to put out and what makes them feel good.

So that's why I was curious how that balance has been. I know all my artist friends that have come on the show have talked about like struggling with it in the beginning and then learning how to marry the two. Because unfortunately you can't have one without the other if you want to make money off your art. Right. You have to be willing to play the game to a certain extent. Yeah. Which is frustrating, but how has it been navigating just as a young woman, like in the industry?

Ew. I think with any industry, we just got to put in a little more work than our male counterparts. That's just what it is. We can't show up with our hair undone or our makeup off or, you know. but I also think that's a question I've been asking myself a lot and and what that means for me and what collaborating with women and reaching out to women like what that does for us in the industry we exist in. Like I'm sure even with you, you know, I think just across all industries that's something that I don't think is going to change but it's something that we just learn to cope with and figure out.

Yeah. And finding other women, too, that you admire or you can kind of bounce things off of. Like sometimes, and obviously, like, again, I'm just a dickhead influencer. So, like, I've told people whenever they're like, do you have any advice if they're like new and up and coming? Sometimes I tell them, I tell them like, you need to make friends. Like make friends in this industry that have the same job, that have the same kind of like goals in mind. because it can be very lonely and isolating. Like when you have no community in the job that you currently have. Because obviously you have your community, hopefully, from before recognition happens.

But then a lot of those dynamics shift too once you enter this world. And then it's like you have like a whole plethora of problems that nobody can relate to at all. And you're like, who the fuck do I talk to about this? I don't know who to ask about this. So do you have like a good community? Did you find that to be really helpful? helpful for you. Yeah, I found some girlfriends that I love. Love period. But I think having those friends who are in the industry I work in is equally as important

as the ones who aren't. Right. Exactly. Sometimes it's nice to just see friends and not talk about work. Work. Oh my God. That's so real. That's so too. When you're doing this, when you drop in this, when you get, when you, it's just like, being able to separate it and like exist in both worlds is something that I found a lot of value in. That's so true. I feel that. I feel that too it's like it feels like I've told them like I've told my family I'm like it's like normal human time yeah so like getting to do normal human things with normal human people is important yeah because doing this like you you like genuinely once I started doing this I was like I get why people go insane yeah I totally get it it makes a lot of sense it's way easier too yeah yeah

left to my own devices with no support system yeah who knows what I'd be doing it's true I'd be crawling up the walls and shit. I'd be going nuts. I'd be walking on all fours of my head turning all the way around. Like, I would be so bad for me. I would be going nuts. Like, I really would without like a strong support system, like, of people who knew you before and did this happen to you. Exactly. I love that you have that too. And I love that you keep your family so close to you too. Yeah, that's everything. I'm always like, plus four. Yeah, exactly. Okay, final ask two. Final ask plus two. I love that. So when I saw your family come in, I was like, oh, she's me. Yeah.

I know. I take them. I even like, I'll take my sister on, because I travel, you like you, I'm sure you travel all the fucking time. So do I. And so sometimes my sister will be like, I don't have to go. And I'm like, yeah, you do. Just to come and hang out with me. I just need you to be there. So I can, when I feel like I'm going cracky, I could just look at you. Yeah. And then I'll feel better. It's good. You can articulate that. Because I think when I was like, when I was a teenager touring and I felt those isolated moments, I think I felt bad about needing help and. just asking for people to be there. Right. And like for no real reason other than just like grounding. Exactly. It's like keeping someone there that can like. That knows you. Yeah.

And gets you and reminds you of who you really are. Because I feel like even when you add in now like the added layers of like social media and like obviously entertainment news, whatever, when you mix all of that shit together, it sometimes it can get really hard to like see yourself for who you really are. Because you're looking at yourself through other people's lenses. Yeah, and how they talk about you. Yeah. How has that been for you as far as, like, being perceived on a very large scale? I think I'm doing much better with it than I, like, was when I came out. You and me both, girl.

I used to read every comment and take everyone personally. Yeah, yeah. You have to have, like, more of a callous attitude. Right. And, like, also understand that people are coming from a whole different perspective in life than you are. So sometimes whatever they're thinking about you, you or whatever they think about the work you put out. It's coming from a place that you might not even understand.

Yeah. And that's, sometimes I just have to literally put that lens on and be like, it's cool. It's not for everybody. Maybe it's not for you right now. Right. Maybe I'm not for, you know. And that's like, again, a very subjective opinion. Like art is very subjective.

So like it's, it's, to say one is good and one is bad, it's just like not fair. Exactly. And it's not said in good faith because art is art regardless, whether it's well received by a lot of people, by a small part of people, by a medium-sized amount of people, it's still art regardless. But I get that too. I feel like especially someone, like an artist like yourself, is like you're putting out something very vulnerable. And so to hear people say rude or callous things is like, of course it's going to rub you the wrong way because it's like this is coming from a very truthful place. Exactly. And it wasn't meant to like be perceived. Exactly. It wasn't,

it was like almost like someone reading your diary. Right. Right. When they listen to your songs, it's essentially what they're doing. Right. And to hear someone be like, I don't like it. Right. For no real reason. No reason. I just don't like it. You're like, okay.

What annoys me sometimes is when people tweet like, I've been seeing a lot of this album. Should I listen to it? And it's like, if you want to listen to it, like why do you need? You have to be told to listen to it? Like that drives me crazy. You know what? That's actually so true.

Right. You know what? I'm really glad you brought that up because sometimes like I came out with a book this year. That's what I toured. And like, it's overwhelmingly did well, thank God. Yeah. But thank you very much. And congrats on your album, by the way.

Your second album, too. But I feel like when I recently, I had like a couple, someone like took an audio from my audiobook and like clipped it and then it started doing well months after it came out. Yeah. And then I started seeing people use it and then say, should I get the book now? This is kind of convincing me. You know what I don't. That's what I want to say, but even though I don't.

Yep. But it's like if you can't, like I need people to think for themselves. side for themselves. Yeah, no, exactly. I'm like, I know. Like, if I want to listen to something, I go and I listen to it. Yeah, like taking people to like it.

It's kind of scary. Yeah, and like watching other people talk about it. They're like, you know what? You've actually convinced me. I think I'm going to try it. It's like, and now I know I like it because you told me to like it. It's just like, or no, I know I hate it because you tweeted that you hate it. Exactly.

Yeah, it goes both ways. I always know people are coming from different places. Yeah. I don't take it personally. You know, sending love and light. Sending love and light. Yeah. so speaking of social media how has it been for you do you do with hate online do you get hate

i get i get i want to say hate but i mean people's opinions it's like trolls yeah trolls trolls i feel that i think i just try to ignore it in this thing for a second and then i see a good comment and then i'm like there you go yeah that's what i tell people yeah i'm like yeah i always ask i always ask my guess that because it's a varying degree of answers like sometimes you were like oh yeah all the time some people were like not really like it's kind of just like what you just said it's very very very Mine is always and constantly, but that's my choice. That's the choice I made when I decided to antagonize men for a living. I expected that.

Oh, I know they be deep too. They come in deep. Oh, yeah, girl. They've had my face on wanted posters all over Reddit forever. You know what I mean? They hate me on that app. Ooh, they hate me over there. Someone once asked me, they asked me, do you, have you ever read your snark Reddit page?

Oh, Lord. And I go, no. Yeah, don't. And I go, I had one of those before. snarks became a thing. Like, like, it's just a bunch of pages of men who fucking hate me. Like, yeah, no, I know they don't like me over there. I don't need to go check.

Yeah, no, like, I get it. Like, trust me, I get it. Well, that's good. I'm glad to hear that you don't get a lot of hate and just, it's more so just random trolls. Like random stuff. Yeah. My fans are so thoughtful and nice. Even if they don't like something, they're going to say it in the most respectful way.

Like, they're real real. Yeah, yeah. I know, sometimes they're a little too real. I'm like, okay. Oh, wait. Okay. Well, relax. Exactly.

I was like, you're a fan? I can't tell. Okay, well, are you on TikTok a lot? No. No, not really? Not really. Must be nice. I'm looking at you through a window.

But I feel like I get the good ones through my sister. Oh, that's good. Like, I know if I get them, the neat, like these are the ones. That's good. That's good. No, I'm happy that you're not on there. Trust me. Stay away, Ray.

Really? You're making it seem so fun, though. It is very fun, but it is a vortex, you know, whether it's for better or worse, honestly. But there is a new kind of trend going on on TikTok. So that's going to bring us to our topic. We're just going to key about it. But we're talking about breaking the mold of traditional gender norms, unpacking a current trend of men on the internet complaining that modern women are,

quote, entitled and ungrateful. Which, like, I mean, par for the course. They say that all the time. And sometimes when people ask me, like, oh, have you seen this? And if it has to do with an awful man, I promise I've seen it. You've seen it, no matter on the deepest, darkest corners of the internet, I've seen it. I trust me, I've seen it. Sometimes I see it far before other people see it.

And we're like, oh my God, queen, have you seen this guy? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. In 2022. Yeah, I saw him in 2022. Yeah. Unfortunately for me.

So this first clip is from a podcast episode called Why Your Man Should Have a Say in What You Wear. That's a really long title. I'm like, first note, first note out the gate. Simplify, right. Abbreviations. Okay, two men are interviewing two women about an incident that happened to one of the women late at night. The man says, aren't you so grateful your man was there to protect you?

And the women responds, well, no, I'm capable of protecting myself. The men get offended and post this clip with the caption, modern women are ungrateful for the protection of men. Which, believe it or not, Raven, that is not the first time I've ever seen a man say something like that. That's probably the hundred thousand. I've seen that's exact. I've seen that's exact. Do you ever get any misogynistic comments or anything that could be perceived as massaging? Not really. My fan base is pretty gay, honestly.

You and me both girls? I'm like, thank God. You and we both girls? One thing about me, the gays got me. They got my back. Yeah. I love that for you. That's fantastic.

Keep it that way. I don't really get those type of comments. Thank God. And is your fan base, like, real protective? Very protective. I love that. Very protective. Okay, I love that.

I feel like, whenever there's, could be an issue they clear it up right they're like nah actually da da da da da da da yeah i love that i love them they ride they ride i'm like oh i didn't even have to tweet right i know i love when they're like it's a real self-correcting yeah system i love it like they're like one of my girls is going to get you they're going to get you they're going to correct that real fast i'll be back later to check i love that and it feels good i'm sure it does it feels good because i feel like like they know my intentions with things and that feels good. Okay, we built a rapport with each other in a way

where they like, they know where I'm coming from. Well, and also I feel like too, it's like critical thinking is very void and a lot of online conversations like there is no critical being whatsoever. No, never, it's never present. And it's always like, I just woke up today and I don't know the context or nuance of anything. And it's frustrating because it's like whenever like people start saying shit or talking shit like trolls, whatever trying to kick things up about you. that are not true, saying they're not true, they'll be like, well, of course you're going to say

that. Of course. There's just no winning either way. So it helps and it feels very validating when you have fans who love you and know you and have followed you forever and like followed your career for a long time for them to be like, that's not true because of this, this and that. Like to see them kind of like listing all the things that you would say. Yeah.

If you defended yourself. Y'all get me. Right. It's moved me to tear sometimes when I see that shit. I'm like, thank God. One of you's listening. Thank God. One of you listening.

Thank God. Somebody has a brain. Dude, somebody. It can really make you feel insane. I love for real. Like, it's like, I even said on the last episode, like, that just came out with Ravina. I had just said Ravina. I love her.

My friend Tephy's described it as, like, sitting in front of a one-way mirror. Yeah. So it's like, you're like in an interrogation room and you can hear everything people are saying, but you can't see them. And they can't hear you. Like, no matter what you say, they're not listening. That's exactly what it is. And it feels so suffocating at times. That's exactly what it is.

So I totally get that. Having fans that are writers. They're like. One thing about her, she's got me. You know what I mean? She gets me. Thank God. Oh my God.

You're all, thank God. One of you's listening to me. Okay, so we have these men saying women are ungrateful for the protection of men. Yeah. Are you ungrateful for the protection of men? I don't know what that means for real. Yeah, me either. Like, what does that mean?

I've talked about this before in the same lens of men being like, oh, what do you, like, you want, you hate all men. What happens when? You need us or something. Yeah. someone breaks into the house or whatever. Yeah. I always think, like, the same thing that would happen if I was alone, like, that's probably what's going to happen?

Like, what are you fucking talking about? Like, there's just two of us now. Like, what do you mean? Like, I just think, hypotheticals. Yeah, it's always like, and what if, what if I killed you? Like, we could go down that route, too. Like, there's just such a pointless conversation to have. Yeah.

But I always think, on a more, like, somewhat serious note, like, the few times I have seen women get harassed in public or like whether it's like sexually harassed or just in general um do you know how many men are around and not doing anything yeah it's true so yeah it's true um no i'm not leaning on y'all that's for fucking sure like you guys don't do that shit normally yeah but in their head cosplaying as like don't talk to her that way yeah i also i also feel like certain things or certain situations don't have to turn into like this match on the men's side of what if but what if but what if yeah i think two things can be very true at least about me right i can love the men in my life and respect them and know that they'll

show up for me but i can also acknowledge that a lot of violence towards women is is inflicted by men right you know and that we aren't protected in a lot of spaces yeah you know so i think the instinct for a lot of men to get defensive and get up in arms about some of the things we say totally and some of the things we are sad about regarding men it's just I don't I don't keep men like that in my life amen that's what I say I say the same shit too I sometimes people have told me like are you just like this all the time yeah I'm always like well no because I don't hang out with men I fucking hate exactly I don't surround myself a little like that I don't I don't see them on the regular I don't see them

constantly I'm just I'm I do it online because I come across it and then I make fun of them and then I move on. And they move on. Yeah. I know. And that's, I think that's the greatest irony is that, like I said,

context and nuance missing always. Yeah. Because I've said on this show, exactly, I've said, when women tell me, if women tell me I hate all men, I don't ever correct her.

Yeah. Because clearly she has a reason for feeling that way. And who am I to tell you you're not allowed to? I'm not. That's not my lived experience. So I am not in a position

to tell you how you can and can't feel. And that's essentially the genesis of my intersectional feminism. Yeah. Is driven by autonomy. So it's like women's right to choose how they act, how they move, how they feel about things, right? So I said that and then all of a sudden someone clip that shit, put it on TikTok and said, well, clearly she said she hates all men.

Stop it. I actually didn't say that, not even a little bit, but it's not shocking to me that men don't listen. So it's crazy how you just like don't listen. Yeah, it's crazy that you just like don't listen. Crazy all that works. And I've had so many men like try to take a very logical approach to like, well the way she chose is to be mean to men is like what about men who are not bad men who are not genuinely not bad and don't and no they aren't yeah don't care about me like they i don't bother them not even a little bit is yada's committed full twitter pages to trolling and and sliding and undermining right all women any and all like every single woman actually like to exist ever yeah especially famous women that's why i was like when when you have women who are singers and artists or models or whatever express any sort of you sort of opinion, boundary, anything like that, jump down their fucking throat, attack them

immediately. And when men do it, they're like, well, he's got a good point. He has boundaries. I love that for him. It feels so elementary, I feel like, to explain it. So sometimes I'm like, they're like, why don't you educate them? I'm like, well, they didn't come out of my cooter, so that's why. He's not my responsibility. That's why. And those personalities I typically don't want to be educated. I just think it's it's all the debate and just sliding and undermining. For who? Yeah. That's why sometimes when they're like, well, debate me. And why would I do that? So my scalp can be even drier. I don't want to do that. Waste my fucking time. I don't want to do that. They don't stress you out. Girl, no. I feel like they don't stress me out. Well, you know,

who stresses me out. Honestly, you know who stresses me out. More is when women are like, well, what about like if women don't like me? Because they. You get that a lot. Yeah, sometimes. Really? Not a lot. but I would say more than you would think. Like I would say if we're looking at a percentage and it's like 100, it's probably 80% men. It got like 20 women. 20's a lot.

I know. Shockingly. And I'm like, I'm fighting for you, girl. And honestly, if they're white women, I'm like, and you're ahead of me in line. What the fuck? Like I'm fighting for your equality, bitch. And you're cutting me.

You're in front of me in the line and I'm fucking fighting for you. It's crazy. But I know that's internalized misogyny. So like I have a lot more. empathy for them. I have a lot, I have a lot of empathy for them at the same time. My empathy can only extend so far before it's like, okay, you're sinking your own ship and I got to keep it moving and help everybody else who's not stuck in this wheel of like, oh, I need men to like me. I need men to like me. Right. I feel like decentering men's validation has freed me. I was like, I'm free.

That's a big task. It is. It is. It can be very, that's a big task. I could be very taxing. Yeah. And I feel like, especially in the industry you're in too, like I feel like that's why a lot of women band together a lot of times because it's like it can like we talked about earlier it could be very isolating but also like sometimes misogyny is very subtle and it's very like minor and it's very that's like the most sinister form of it to me because there are I think more men like that than there are men who are like out in the kitchen yeah you know what I'm saying like yeah those men you could spot from a mile away but there are other men who are a lot more subtle with their misogyny And those are the men who don't like me because it flares something a little bit.

You know what I mean? So, well, I'm like, par for the course. They hate me. We all know that. Okay, so I'll read some of the comments on this. This says, she can defend herself, L.O.L. I'm starting to think these women have been overprotected and pampered. They are clueless.

I find it very strange when, like, women are talking to a very outright misogynist and you're like, I just don't want you to be mean to me. Like, if that's cool. Yeah. And then men go, well, then I should be able to be. to punch you in the fucking face. You're a psycho. Like, hey, buddy, see a doctor.

Like, you need help. Like, their first instinct is to be like, and what if I tried to kill you? Then what? Yeah. I was talking about, like, I was talking about being nice, but you're talking about murder?

That's what I'm like, a lot of these interactions just show more about, like, the other person. Right. Like, that's what I take away from it. Right. You got a lot going on.

Right. Yeah, I'm actually scared. You're weird and I don't like it. It's giving me bad weird. Okay, this next one says, I can protect myself, like they're mocking her. Yeah. The independent women are too independent.

Y'all keep this up and you all are going to be marrying a cat and drinking Henny to sleep. Huh? Drinking Hennessy, Hennessy, specifically, why? Why do you see? Is that a spinster drink? Every single bitch drinks Hennessy. Okay. Do you like Hennessy?

I don't really like him to say to be honest. Yeah, I don't. It hurts my stomach. It's not talking about me. I feel like, well, I just think pooping my pants is not really my body. That's why I don't like any kind of whiskey or anything like that. No, anything dark, like, turns my stomach completely. Yeah, completely.

I don't even really like drinking that much anymore. I feel like, well, I just feel so old, like mentally. But I feel like I drank too much in college and that's why I was like. You just got turned off. Oh, good. Yeah. That's okay. Maybe just a season.

Now I have like a few fun, a fun drink. No spurts. I'm like, like an old white mom. That's how much funner. Yeah. Drunk off two glasses of champagne. That's me. That's my kind of wine, too. That's my drink of choice is always like champagne because it doesn't hurt me.

What about yours? It just feels fun. Yeah. I like champagne. I love wine. Like a little stuff. Well, I love wine. Do you like a white or a red?

Right. Really? I like more of a white, but I think it's because I'm a baby when it comes to the taste. Red wine's intense. Okay. I haven't drank it in a while, though. so maybe I need to re-up. I can see, could you like champagne?

It's like a softer, sweeter, sweeter. Yeah, a lighter. I like a, like a reesling or a pinot. Yeah. Red just feel grown. That does feel really grown, huh? Damn, you're inspiring me. Not gonna want to try.

Like red wine in a bath? Exactly. Grown. Roan, grown, grown. Hair up in a clip. See, he didn't say red wine. No, he doesn't get it. Wrong.

He doesn't know. Okay, this last one says, this is why no one wants to get married anymore. Oh, God. These women think they're married. men. The United States has made y'all delusional. The United States. What I got to do with the United States? Okay. I'm assuming because the United States is, and this is not saying much, far more liberal for women. Yeah. And that's not saying much, is it? Considering we're still fighting for our bodily autonomy. So clearly that's not doing much.

This is why no one wants to get married anymore. These women think they're men. I don't really, I feel like the idea of a gender role is exhausting to me. I'm more of a capability kind of person. So I'm like, I just think like whoever's best should do it. Are these people like in real relationships? Oh, I think that all the time. How real relationships work. There's usually some tug and pool and you do this because you're better at this.

I do this because I'm better at this. Exactly. And we kind of even each other out. It's really that simple, isn't it? people like in a room with a TV with matches on the floor like that type of that's what I think right I'm like I don't think you've ever spoken to a human woman ever considering that's why I've said before like my my fiance like he loves to cook I don't yeah so he cooks yeah and he refers to and that's okay because cooking is not a gendered thing yeah or not we can all learn how to boil an

egg way I'm like I'm not about to torment us you know I know torture us with my cooking and honestly I just like I get bored yeah standing there cooking. I'm like, just standing there. I feel like I'm shackled to the fucking oven. I'm like, oh,

I'm stuck here and I want to talk. I'm not a cook. I just, no, I'm a yapper. Yeah. I love to yapp. You keep them company while you're doing it.

Exactly. I'll, I'll entertain. I'll sit and tell a story. I'll sit and tell a long, winded story. Yeah. You don't like to cook either.

Not yet. Yeah. Not yet. Maybe in the future, maybe in a different part of my life. But right now, I just can't focus on it. And then I'm like,

Usually when I think about cooking, I'm already hungry. Right. So like cooking and then like I notice not about to be as good as the place next door that I can order from. Carol, what am I doing all this for? Every time I have dishes, I'm like, see this is, see what happens when we eat at home. We got to clean. We got to clean. We have to wash dishes.

I can walk. So I'm kind of saving an earth for a little bit. You're so me. I'll tell myself every excuse in the book. I'm like, if you think about it, I'm actually saving money. If you really think about it, if you really think about it, I'm actually saving money. and the earth and and so many other things and also i'm i'm putting i'm putting money in the hands of people who need it yeah see i'm tipping well see if anything you got to think about all of that yeah

you do i'll tell myself every excuse in the book i'm like this is right and especially too with traveling all the time it's like it's fucking hard to have food at home when i first started doing this and leaving all the time i felt like every time i came home the first thing had to do was empty my fridge because all my shit went wrong you don't want a grocery shop because you got to leave again No, for real. So it's like impossible. Right, literally. That's what you said eating on the road.

I felt like was a task in it of itself too because I was so tired. Yeah. And do you glam before shows and stuff too? I glam before shows. It's a lot of work. It is. You know what's funny? Halfway through our tour because I toured with my sister because we have our own podcast

too. And so like the two of us were doing it, performing every night together. And so like we had to take turns getting glammed. And like halfway through I was like, I feel like every time I've watched a documentary movie about going on tour. There was a lot of jack around time. These men are like they're riding scooters and they're like playing soccer and they're like having fun.

No, and I go and then I realize they don't have to sit and fucking glam for two hours. So I have no jack around time. It's a lot. As soon as I get to the venue, I have to get in that fucking chair and start getting ready immediately. Sound check, test the sound, come back and get ready.

I had to do a sound check too, which is so silly because all I'm doing is sitting up there telling people to suck my wiener. I shouldn't have to do a sound check for that. I don't have any. in ear for that. How long were your sound checks? They were probably like, I'm complaining, but they were probably like 10 minutes. Okay. Yeah, yours are probably an hour. How long are yours? Um, like 45. It depends, but like 45. What do you typically do for a sound check? Do you just go,

do you go over every song or do you kind of just test levels with certain songs? I test levels. I test some that like I, it's kind of a vocal warm up for me too. So I like to do like some of the harder songs. Okay. But it's just a good moment to like get a feel for the venue. True. Like the sound people. get it out in. Yeah. But like, you're just real professional. I'm like, oh, I'm like,

I just stand up here and be like testing, testing, one, two, three. And then they go, okay, you're good. And then I walk back. But you're right. It's like, it's no downtime. No, there's none. Did you see the city?

Did you? No, I did it. I really didn't. Me too. I'm like, I didn't see shit. Yeah. I haven't seen. I opened my eyes.

I came, I went to, I saw the inside of a hotel room. I saw the inside of this green room. Yep. And I'm going to see the inside of my eyelids. Exactly. When I leave here, I'm going to wake up in Nashville. That's it.

When I leave here, I'm waking up in a different city. Yeah. It's exhausting. It is. It's like, I think that was like when I got home from tour. Yeah. The first night in my own bed. You felt it.

Oh, girl, I felt like I was, I felt like what I believe dogs feel when they have the zoomies. You know what I mean? And then they're like, that's why. I felt like I was going insane again in my own bed, but I was just like had tears in my eyes because I was just so grateful. It's the best feeling. To be home. It's the best feeling. Oh my gosh.

I know. It's like my smells. Yeah. My clothes. The smell thing is so real. I felt so keen. I felt so akin to smell on tour. Yeah.

Which like in every venue. Every venue got its own thing going on. Oh my gosh. It has its own smell. Put a candle on your rider. Put candles on your writer. That's such a good idea. This is my first tour doing that and I was like this day of my life.

That's such a good idea. Oh my God. I'm for sure going to keep on your writer. I'm like Carrie because Carrie's my assistant. Carrie, keep note of that. Carrie, keep note of that. that's such a good idea what is on your writer what do you like having on your writer this i did like a really this is my

best writer oh t okay space heater you got that fan uh makeup removal with the cotton pads you need both because you will run out um oatmeal that saved my life this entire tour because we're leaving so early and most hotels have just like the hot milk or hot water that's true just throw it in there real quick get on the bus. us. So young, you got to think about it or stop. I love it. I love a quick oatmeal.

I love a cafeteria oatmeal. Yeah, exactly. Like the little bit ladle. I love those. Okay, so you have oatmeal. Just really think about the stuff you really need when you go on tour. I like the little stuff, you know. Right.

Like halfway, I feel like did you change your writer at all? Like halfway through, if you got too many of one thing. I was going to 10 bananas in every city. And I was like, I cannot get any more bananas. We kept changing ours too because we were like, okay, we have. 2,000 romans let's go ahead and change that one. And we're like, what else do we need? What else do we need?

Yeah, we thought about that all the time too. Yeah. Because I had so many people on the, on the tour with us. Right. So you're thinking about everybody's needs. Yeah, what everybody likes and like what people don't like. I was like, we can't even hold any more bananas. Right.

They're all going back. Get rid of them. I know we had a veggie tray, I think the first week. Yeah. Then we had seven of them and we were like, hey, these are disgusting, throw these out. Don't ask for those. Because then you feel bad. leaving stuff.

I know you take everything with you. Yeah. But I'm like, I'm not going to use this. I'm really not. Just take it off. Just take it off. Ooh, that's so real. I know we,

one of our main ones because we were touring in the summer and I'm a big sweaty girl. Most of my family is, we're all sweaty girls. We would have them turn the air down to like as low as it can go. Oh my. But I think it's because we were touring such old and small venues. Yeah.

It just takes a million years for it to turn on. And we did one show in Chicago. The green room was above the venue and it was like an apartment and it was a little scary because it was giving brothel, which is a little scary. Oh, Chicago. I know. And then when we went downstairs, no air. Not nothing.

No air. They had those big Home Depot fans and that's it. But then they had to turn those off once we started performing because it'll blow the mics and you can't hear us and they're too loud. And I remember like when I went on stage, it felt like the Everglades in that bitch. I was like, it is a swampy in here. And I was literally talking, I'm like, if I was a patron, I wouldn't sit through that. It was that bad.

It was that humid and hot. Chicago. Do you better. Don't embarrass me. And they honestly, they didn't take their cut or anything because they felt so bad. They knew it was bad. Yeah, they were like, it was so bad. We're so sorry about it.

Like, it had just. But then I saw people saying that went to that show. They've been in that video. Like I always like this. Yeah, they said, it's always hot. The air is never on. I was like, they lied to us. But I was like, I'm such a sweaty girl that I was.

was like, this is miserable. I cannot. Every person stayed the entire show. Wow. And it's not like. Right. At that venue. Right.

And I'm not like you like singing and entertaining really. I'm just like sitting and making fun of them. And they sat through the entire thing, which I'm grateful for. Still at lights, at like everything. Right. Did you ever have a performance where you were like, oh my God, everything's going wrong. I hate this.

Oh, going wrong. Or just like stressful for whatever reason. Funny enough, Chicago was my suites show. Right. This tour. But I wore the wrong thing too. Oh, you did. It's thin.

Did you wear like a long sleeve? It was a long sleeve, but it was the type of material that like clings. Oh, yeah. It's like tight. Yeah. And showed every sweat spot. Like everything, everything. That's so funny.

Here, here, here, everywhere. It's just, it's obvious. Just push through. I come off stage. There's a song I come off stage and like kind of pat down. Like every. And my tour manager was like, don't put your arms up anymore. I'm gonna miss.

They're like arms, arms locked, arms locked at the sides from now on. We're swaying and arms are down. I was like, oh, it must be bad. Don't put your arms up anymore. I'm like, we've reached, we've reached. You know, you're all, oh, it must be bad as they're telling me. That's crazy. Oh my gosh, that's happened to me too.

I'm the sweaty's girl alive, so, and it feels like, it honest also feels like it's never and no one ever sweats. Yeah. And when I, I remember recently I did like an interview thing, but it was in studio. And so I was like talking to one other person on camera. Yeah. And you could see my full body. I'm like sitting on a stool.

And I had this like, it's like a two piece. Like it looked like a dress, but it's like a two piece thing. And it's really tight. Like it's like that silk kind of thing. Right. And I had hair down and it was like a turtle neck. So it's like gripping my neck too. And they're like, oh, turn the air off.

I'm like, no, perfect. Perfect. I love it. Turn the air off. And they turn it off. because obviously they don't want to hear it in the mics. And so I was sweating like a motherfucker. We had to keep pausing so that I could wipe off, like towel off, like a boxer.

And then I remember at the end, when we wrapped finally, I was like, oh, thank God, like I'm done. Yeah. The sound guy came up to me and was like, oh, can I grab your mic? And it slipped off. Girl, I was like my sister because I had it, it was blue. And I was like, I knew I was sweating through it. I just knew. And I was like, whatever my back looks like, please don't hold that again.

I have to say that all the time. Girl, I'm like, if it looks horrifying back there, I'm so sorry. I'm very sorry. And I was telling Jason, like, my sister, I was telling her, it's also because that's a man taking it off me and I'm like, me not wanting to get caught slipping. Right. Exactly. Like, oops.

Don't you hold that against me. Don't you dare. And I literally was like, and it's because I sweat through the sides to like armpits and everything. Yeah. It's okay. Have you thought about like getting Botox and stuff to not sweat? I don't feel like you sweat nearly as much as I do.

I need to entertain. I'm nervous sweat. I nervous sweat. Nervous sweat. Yeah. That's tea. I nervous, but like not, like definitely my underarms. But both talks helps with that.

I didn't know that. Apparently, if you get them like injected, it helps the sweat not come down. Yeah. Maybe some with the poorest clothes. Something like it's like it freezes them. And then what they do say, though, is that it redirects to another part of your body because the sweat has to come out. Yeah, I'm like, what have? I got to come out.

Yeah. So you still get hot, but it just redirects and I'm like, okay. To a different place. Yeah. So because I'm more of a face sweater. Okay. That's like where normal like gush is out of me. Yeah.

But then I'm like, well, let me find out I get the Botox and they goes to my lower back. How is that any better? Or your feet or somewhere random. Then I have a different problem. I have to figure out. They got it. You got to keep going bad. That's how they get you.

Exactly. Okay. Okay, let me move on to this next one. I'm like, back to misogyny. Okay. Speaking of sweaty. Okay. So in this video, a woman who makes dating TikTok says she's received a lot of comments

that men would rather marry a. quote traditional woman than a quote modern woman she asked viewers if this is true and what the terms of traditional versus modern right even means to them and these men in the comments had a lot of thoughts okay of course they did oh I'm so glad I want to hear what men have to say all the time everything this one says they're problematic have no self-control super narcissistic have no skills outside of a nine to five not feminine no self-preservation huh this is this is from a man. This is a man. A man saying why he hates modern women. Okay. Okay. Okay. No skills outside of a nine to five.

This is just such a huge generalization. Like, is that not insane? Yeah, that's insane. Like, what am I supposed to be a fucking cartographer? Like, no. They're like, oh, can you, can you so? Like, also teaching straight, awful men, the term narcissistic. It was a curse. It was a curse, but on this earth, bitch. That was one of the curses that came out of Pandora's box. That's for real.

They should have never given him that word. The access is the word. Because she asks what's the difference to men? Yeah. Like why, if you feel that way, why? And what would be the difference between a tradition? And every time they say traditional. What did they mean by that?

Maybe that's a trad wife. Have you heard of trad wives? No. They're just, it's women. Stay at home. Stay at home. Cook clean. Okay.

And they don't talk much. So it's like no talking, no thoughts, no nothing. It's stay. Home, cook, clean, yeah. It's basically, like, I've said before, like, men like that, they say, like, oh, I just want a homemaker. I'm like, no, you fucking don't. Yeah. You want a lobotomized bitch.

Like, that's what you want. You want a bitch that is just standing there and does whatever you say. And agrees. Yeah, and agrees with everything you say and has no problem with anything you do. And then cooks and cleans and serves you like a, like a servant. I don't know. Any woman like that. Me?

That exists. Like, ever. Yeah. That's what I was like, I think about, I think even back generationally, like in my family. and I was like, every bitch in my bloodline is loud as fuck. Like, I don't know. There's a lot of women in my family too. So I think I'm just very used to growing up in a women-dominated, like, space.

Same. And my, I'm someone, so I'm, I'm indigenous Pacific Islander. So, like, I've told people before someone, someone culture prior to being colonized is very matriarchal. So we've always, yeah, we've always held women in very high regard. A lot of Pacific Islander communities are the same exact way. So women have always been empowered in my purview, like in my perspective. So when I started- You came outside and it was like- Yeah, I said, ooh, ew, that's how you're doing it out here?

Yuck! I said, oh, that's not going to work for me. It's not going to work. That's not going to work for me. Oh, like, these don't sound like real breathing women. That's what I'm saying. Like, who are they, I'm just said, who are you referencing? Like, especially a lot of times they're young men.

So I'm like, you haven't even lived long enough to meet enough women. Yeah. let alone a woman exactly like the way you're describing. I don't know. It's so, yeah, y'all are scary. This says, I've dated too many strong and independent women or girl bosses. No more. Those women are not it.

Well, I can lie on the internet too. They lie all the time and nobody is like, I don't, hey, I don't believe you. Like when men say, I've dated a lot of them, I don't believe you. I don't believe you. I don't believe you. I think you're a liar. I think Pixar didn't happen. You know, that's how I felt.

Yeah. Okay, I'll just, I'll do this last shit comment, but it says there's a third modern woman. They're not independent or career driven, but have a conflated sense of entitlement due to online validation. Guilty as charge. I'm the one validating them hoes. You know what I'm saying? Like, it'll be me every day all day until the end of time, bitch. That is so funny.

That's me, bitch. You're looking at her. To me, it sounds like some jealousy. I think men should be in men's comments, like hyping them up a little bit. Right. And that's what they want. Exactly. They're like, there's a third one.

And it's a picture comes on TikTok and gets validated by somebody else. I'm like, men seek validation from each other all the time. All the time. I'm like, no one needs validation more than like men like this. Yeah, it's true. And they need it from other grown men. It's true. Never from the women that they're allegedly liking and they want to date.

Yeah. The other day, or literally like two days ago, I got back from a trip with my family. And we were standing at the baggage claim. and this old, this old ass white guy. And I can say that because he was a dick. But like this old ass white guy. Old white guys salivate over my boyfriend, like, or my fiancee and my dad. Because they're big brown guys.

Yeah. And my dad used to play in the NFL a long time ago. And so like when they see my dad, they're like, sports. Like immediately. They got to say something. Yeah, they're like, sports, sports. And so this guy was holding my dad hostage, a baggage claim talking about sports for God

knows how long. Okay. And my poor dad, my dad is so shy and like antisocial that my dad's just like, okay. He just stares with a smile on his face, doesn't talk and they just talk at him for like 30 minutes. So this guy's like talking his ear off and eventually we were like, okay, we got to go. So we leave. And my dad was telling us in the car, what are you saying? He's like, yeah, he's talking about like baseball and he was telling me about, you know, his season tickets. And he was telling me about like this guy's stats from college, like all this shit. random all about baseball players what the fuck ever yeah and this man's like probably in his like 70s and i told my dad i said i find it shocking when men like the only thing that makes up their entire personality is memorizing the accomplishments of men far greater than them you're a fucking weirdo

you're a loser hey you're a loser you're a big fat loser bitch that's all they have in their brain they can't talk about anything else like you are boring as fuck and you're a weirdo, like, sorry, sorry. And that's how all these men are. Like, they're like, again, lobotomize. Like, they want to, like, just being able to cite off the 1965 World Series MVP's college. You were a freak. Hey, you're a freak.

Hey, grow another personality. I'm sorry, find something else. And it's crazy how in the midst of him, like, telling my dad all this shit that nobody cares about, he made like a bunch of transphobic comments too. How did that get slip in? Girl, I don't know. I said, huh? Like, what the fuck?

You're talking about the World Series? And how did you get there? Oh, I know why. Because, like, my dad was wearing a hat that was a Yankees hat. The Yankees are in the World Series. My dad doesn't give a fuck about baseball. He just liked the color of the hat. Which honestly would have been so funny if he said that.

I'm a fan of him. I just dig the color. It's pretty much that. But he talked to him about the Yankees for 30 minutes. And he was like, yeah, next thing you know, they're going to make, they're going to make them in, in different colors. Like, for trans people. What? What?

Yeah. What would that even look like? And what does that have to do with baseball? What does that have to do with, like, why? And then I told my dad, I said, that man is so old. I could have pushed him over and he would turn to dust. Fuck you, bitch. Like, get out of here, you geriatric fuck.

Like, I made him even safe. Like, people are me. And then I'm like, and then you expect me to not make fun of you when I get in the car? I'm going to. Yeah. I was like, I'm not surprised that trans people scare you because you've been alive since, I'm sure you were in grade school with Jesus Christ. So sorry.

The world looks a lot different than it did. back when you lived in Jerusalem, you fucking old bitch. That's why it makes me so mad. I get so angry at old white people who act like that. Like it makes me so mad. I feel like personally attacked. I said, girl, don't worry about trans people. Get your affairs in order.

Because one fart and you're gone. You're done. You better get out of my face immediately. I hate old people. I don't hate old people. I hate old bigoted people. Yeah. That's who I hate.

But my point being, from like me going on a complete and utter tangent. My point being, like men like that, that is a man who grew up who constantly seeks the validation of other men. And I said, and look, you are father time. And you still care what men think about you? What a prison.

That must be a prison. You really got to feel bad. Really. Like, it's just truly like, that is sad. And I think I talk about that too. I'm like, the irony of men getting so mad at me, like very specific awful men, getting so pissed off at what I do,

is that if you fought with me, it could free you too. Yeah. Like, it hurts all of us. It doesn't just hurt women. It doesn't just hurt, you know, gay people, trans people, not binary people. It hurts everybody, including men. And I was like, it must be a prison to, like, feel like you have to perform every time you see other men that look big and strong. Yeah.

Weird. You're a big freak. You're a weirdo. Yeah. What sign are you? What do you think? I don't know. Aquarius.

An Aquarius? I love Aquarians. Really? Well, Aquarius women. I love Aquarian women. I would say that about any sign when it comes to men. I'm like, I hate them all. I'm a Virgo.

Oh, cute. I love y'all. I know. I love Aquarian women. I get along with Aquarian women pretty well, I would say. That's good. But to be honest, I feel like I get along with all the signs. Yeah.

It's just men where I'm like, you know what I mean? I love y'all because I feel like you're bringing so much, like, structure to us. Yeah, planning, real life. Right. You bring us, like, down. Okay. Aquarians are always so creative. Yeah.

Like, that's why it makes a lot of sense that you're an artist. Like, they're so creative and the way you see things. And Aquarians always dress fucking awesome. And they're always like your taste in music and art and everything, film. What else? Top notch. Oh my gosh. What else do you like about me?

I don't. Make sure we're a row. Okay, just to wrap us. I know we talked about all kinds of things, but what I would love to end on would be if you have any advice for any up-and-coming artists, especially young women, and just people in general who feel maybe like,

I feel like this past year especially has been a really big year for women in music, which is fantastic, and I'm so happy that you're in there too. I'm so excited about that. Thank you, boo. Yeah, what would you say is your best piece of advice for people who are pursuing it, especially because you started so young.

Yeah. And like, like how to navigate it or how to like stay close to their art form, anything like that. That's tough. Mm-hmm. I think the biggest thing to keep in mind is that there are going to be a lot of voices and opinions. And people who are older than you, who you think are smarter than you. Yeah.

But really zeroing in on like what you want in your voice. and the things that make you feel good out of music and like holding on to that. Totally. And not letting all the other things cloud that. I know that sounds like a big word salad that a lot of people may say. But I think it's crucial. Absolutely. And even just keeping family close is something that has helped me a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot.

Even moving from Chicago to a whole other city where I didn't really know anybody. And you can just easily get lost and get. sway this way or that way. That's so true. But I think like channeling that inner voice and like making it for me is getting clearer and clearer the odor I get and I'm able to hear it a little better. Thankfully. Yeah.

Which is a wonderful thing. And I'm glad you're listening to it too. Yeah. Because I feel like women especially who like grow up essentially in the industry that you're in currently is like they almost get taught and trained to not listen to that voice because like you said, it's easy to be moved. Yep. So I think that's a wonderful thing.

And I do want to say, too, that I think you are fantastic. And I think your art is so beautiful. And I'm excited to see where you keep going. I know you're on a real trajectory right now, but I'm very excited for you. And I'm on the ground floor. Where the fuck were you at? Exactly. You weren't here with me.

Tune in with me. Thank you so much for coming on the show. Thank you, love. I think you're fantastic and amazing and so talented. And for those who don't know, where can they find you? You can find me on everything at Raven Linnae. period and you can stream all of raven's music on all streaming platforms as well yeah and you are going on tour again yeah in november how exciting for europe yep yep yep we have a lot of european listeners get into it europe i'm like

you just saying europe as a person's name thank you all so much for tuning in thank you to my amazing guest ravin for coming on for those of you that don't remember or aren't familiar new episodes of the comment section drop every Wednesday. You can stream the audio on all streaming platforms or you can watch the video exclusively and for free on Spotify, which is perfect because Raven Linnae's whole entire discography is also on Spotify. You can listen to that. You can watch this episode and then you can go see you on tour in Europe if you would like. And thank you all so much for tuning in. Thank you to my amazing guests and I'll see you next week. Bye.