The Comment Section with Drew Afualo - TURN THAT YEARN UP Ft. LaurDIY & Jeremy Lewis | The Comment Section Ep. 134

Episode Date: September 4, 2024

Lauren and Jeremy join Drew on the show today for the most dog-centric episode yet (unpacking their dogs' niche health issues). They talk being a Hinge couple, Squid needing an exorcism, yapping in the middle of the night, stealing small spoons, sweating, and so much more. Drew: linktr.ee/drewafualo LaurDIY: IG / TikTok Jeremy: IG / TikTok For sponsorships/partnerships, email [e-mail]. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We fill up our, like, stand the cup every morning and, like, drop ice everywhere. And we're like, man, I wish we just had, like, a little dog who was stoked on ice. Are you going to get that? Yeah. They're like, I just stepped in this. The fuck. Yeah. No, like, because I, that's, oh, what's wrong with you?

You sloth. You barn animal. Hey, everyone, and welcome back to another episode of the Common Section show starring me, your favorite. Who Cares About Me? On to the guest. Today, we have the iconic, the legendary, the couple to end all couples, Miss Lour, DIY, and her husband. husband Jeremy.

Woo! Lauren and Jeremy! Hi. Hello. Welcome to the show, one of my favorite couples in the world. Oh my god, thanks for having us. One of the few straight couples I'm friends with. Let's go.

All my friends are gay. Same. Same. Us too. It started out as a joke. Literally. It's not a joke anymore. Yeah, it's not.

It very quickly became not a joke. We are very much like the token straight couple of so many of our gay friends. Same. Same. They're always like, but you're always like, you're just, it's not a joke. You guys, it's not the same with you. You could pass. Yeah, they're like, it's not the same with you. Like I hate straight people, but it's not the same with you.

I'm like, that's fine. Ally. All right. Yeah. We're all allies. Thank you. Thank you so much for coming on the show, both of you. I just wanted to your mom again, to be honest.

I had that sense about you, Jeremy. Jeremy and my mom are like this. They're besties. They're besties. They bonded so quickly. I'm so happy to have both y'all on the show. Y'all are legends, especially in the YouTube game. Ms. Laura DIY.

Hello. You've been on the internet for a long time now. I'm basically at a fossil at this point. Do you feel like a senior citizen? Oh my God, yeah. Because I do. It's when people hit, like, hit you with like the, oh, you're so OG. Yeah.

I'm like, yeah. I used to watch your videos when I was in elementary school and you're like. It's so painful. Like, oh my God, you raised me. I used to watch you so much. I'm like, hit me with that past tense. Damn. I used to watch you.

I know. It's the past tense that cuts so deep. I'm like, oh. They're like, I don't anymore, by the way. Yeah. I want to make sure you know that I don't. You're not actually cool anymore, but six years ago, you were the shit. That's about the time I go, do you want a picture?

Here, I'll take it. I'll take it. I'll take it. I love that. But now you all have a podcast together. We do. And how's that been? How did that come about?

I would love to know. How did it come about? I feel like, so I have a quarterly spiral, I would say career-wise, emotionally wise, personal wise, like quarterly on a quarterly basis. It's like incredibly consistent. And I feel like there was a point where, again, like, referencing kind of like my older content where I was making a content shift in terms of transitioning to like an older audience. And I feel like starting a new platform, like a podcast is like a nice clean slate to be able to like, you know, reintroduce yourself.

Yeah. And this was kind of, I think it was right before COVID started too. And so the only co-host and best option, obviously, is the one that was in my COVID bubble. Obviously. Not that moose and d. In-house staff. In-house staff. Not that Moos and Diggi don't have, like, so much great things to say.

Of course they do. But they couldn't turn the camera on. They couldn't turn the camera on. And Jeremy is a tech whiz. I mean, you saw our house and our cell and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Your house is, your studio is insane.

It's a, I know. When I was telling Warren about it, she was like, oh, this is all. I was like, I have no idea what's going on. Like, I can press a record button and that's about it. Well, I'd love to know y'all's origins. How you all met, how y'all came to be. Yeah. Go ahead.

It was work at Jason. We are a hinge couple, yeah. Okay, so kind of, kind of. They're like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, with a clause. With a clause. You start, I'll go on. So we, um, were you online during the era of the roast yourself rap parody music? I think so, yeah.

Yeah, okay. Not like a, not an era that I'm proud of to have participated in. Did it print money? Yes, absolutely. Of course it did. Do I still get a check from Spotify? Yes. Of course it did.

But in that era, we were both in other relationships and the company that Jeremy were which is like an independent music distributor had partnered with my management company. So a little old me in thousand like 15, 16 trying to like put my parody music on Spotify, got partnered with Jeremy's company. And he was the liaison between me and the platform. And so we had like multiple calls and emails back and forth two years before reconnecting and being single. That's crazy. Which you thought I was gay.

Yeah. You left out the most important part. Yeah, so sorry. So sorry. Which like fast forward five years made it into my vows, which was... Literally into his vows at the wedding. Oh man, it's his oldest time. But no, like we, I found him on social media and I was like, oh shit, I was like,

Jeremy's with a woman. I was like sick. I love that for a second. Look at his hair. His hair is so good. And like his social skills he can like carry us, like, speak a full sentence. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, exactly. His general, like, hygiene is just like, you know, quite solid.

Right. Okay. The verse on the literal ground. It's below the ground. It's below the ground. It's below the room. It's undergarde. I think back to it, it's funny because we had to show this numbers.

I had your email. I had your manager's email. You probably have my social. Like literally. Probably have like your payment information. Yeah, your banking info. But I will say like there was not a world where that information given to me in the work setting.

Yeah. Was a personal thing. And so it's like. That's a good note. We had to like get reintroduced in like a different, I guess, perspective. Yeah. And then it was like, you know. It makes it even crazier that you were just like casually working together and then so

two years later. Yeah. So then he saw me, two years later like fast forward, he saw me on Raya and was like, oh, she's single, messaged me on Instagram. This was like before it like really helped filter your DMs. I missed the DM. So she ignored it. So she ignored.

You saw conflicting stories. She ignored it. Conflicting stories. Because it's funny, it's like I'll see her on the couch today just check in them DM requests. Like the DM filters now are so good. Like they've got them like categorized and done like nice. That's not my.

Yeah, that's not meta. Yeah, that's not meta. That's not meta. But then I saw him on Hinge, and I was like, freshly single and I was like, I'm, my first time being single in LA. I was like, I'd love to go on dates with people that, like, I know aren't going to be a serial killer, like, trying to go on dates to people that have, like, some mutuals. You still have time, you know.

You can work up to that. Again, had your email, though. Well, I've already done the slate thing now. Yeah, yeah, so I can do something else now. It was funny that because, like, I called her to confirm before the first day. Like, hey, still on for it tonight? Okay, wait, hang on, no, no, back out though. So we, yeah, okay, okay, okay, that's what I'm saying?

I'd be like, what are you calling me for? I'd be like, what are you calling me for? Don't call me. So you know, I'm not a serial killer. No, but it almost like was reverse psychology and made me weirded out. Sometimes I think maybe I'm not the problem. Sometimes I think you're gaslighting me into thinking I'm weird. That I'm the problem.

No, we called me and like, I'm like not like a phone call person. Like an unannounced phone call. I'm like fucking like panicky. It makes me like itchy, you know? He's nervous. And so I was like, oh my god. He said, hello, my lady. Yeah, he was like, I was like,

Jamie's calling me. I was like, what do I do I answer this? And we had a day, voice cracking. I know, I call, hey, on for tonight? Yeah, totally. See what's seven. Gotta go by.

Okay. Are you in the treadmill? Really, why are you so out of breath? No, literally panicking. You panicking. Me panicking. What'd you guys do on the first day? We went to a cute little restaurant

around the quarter from my spot and then he also showed up with a dog toy which was really nice oh for your dog yeah what it was for you that's okay this is for you this is for you must not been like too concerned with me being a stiro killer because the moment I gave it to you like you put it to the side and then like at the end of there did you want to come back and give it to him you just being so naive I hadn't been single in so long like not knowing that could be the last time anyone saw yeah do you want to like hang out more a little And there was a very, I think I give you a cheek kiss.

A cheek kiss, I hate him with a cheek kiss. Yeah. Nice. Like, I newly single though, so I have no idea. Like, I'm, my first line to him on Hange literally was, hey, friend. I should be fucking fired. Brother. Yeah, brother.

Hey, dude. Yeah. But, like, classic guy. I was like, all I need. No worries. The door is open. Like, like, opened it a little bit. That's it.

Fine. We're right in there. Hey, friend. Am I trying to friends on myself? Like, what are we doing? What in the fuck am I doing? I think it's, it's, I think what your approach was just, very good because it's like it's almost like we adopt shelter dogs you got to

you got to let them come to you yeah like women aren't who are insane like men are awful and dating men is hard yeah good men are kind of like whenever you're ready I'm right here oh the no Jeremy was was a little bit awful before me oh it's awful oh terrible terrible oh yeah terrible but like the dating in LA you you look across the table and you just see someone who's like you've been on a lot of terrible days happened yeah because like it The expectations are like, oh, that makes me sad to even think about. Yeah.

Showing up on time. Yeah. Pain. That was... Again, the bar is underground. I mean, beyond. I was shocked when my boyfriend showed up on time. My boyfriend was early. Like, he was like 20 minutes early.

Okay, that's crazy. Okay, that's crazy. Again. I'm early. I'm here whenever you're ready. And I was like, I got to put a drink ordering. You want to see me so bad. You're literally love you.

You're literally in love with me. This isn't going to work. That's so funny because I was ignoring my boyfriend to when he was initially talking to. She said, ignoring two, ignoring two. She joined. Yeah, she joined you. It's all right, Lauren.

Yeah. Enough time is past, I can laugh about it with him. This is on meta. This is a meta problem. We had a pretty, like, not chill, like, first month or two. We went from not knowing each other at all to like hanging out pretty incessantly. Yeah, I mean, I feel like you and your boyfriend were the same.

Like, like, he was like, can I see you tomorrow? Yeah, he was so intentional. I think intentionality it throws me off because that's never how. Same. that have ever been. That's why I was like, I was like, hang on a minute,

what's going on here. Yeah, what happened? What do you want? Yeah, what do you want? What happened to that? What do you mean? The dudes have always been like,

bold and like saying things that like is like aligned with the agenda. Yeah. But it's like why wouldn't they be more? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're so right. Yeah.

Where do we lose the plot here? It's like like the old movies. You would just see someone be like wildly bold in the street and like professing love. Right. But in like a polite way. But like boo box on like the, at the window. Right.

Yeah. Which is a little, I don't know about the rock under that. I'm saying, some people have been like, bring back yearning. Yeah, bring back. Yeah, rebe-erning. That's funny. Yearning. That's funny.

It's true. Can we up the yearn? Let's turn that urine right up. It's crazy too, because I made a TikTok recently talking about that, like with my boyfriend, like the early stages of it. And he was so intentional, like I said he'd be like, can I see you tomorrow? And I'd be like, yes. Talking weird out. Okay.

past that like sometimes like one time I literally just didn't text it back because I just felt like it was too weird like too serious because he was gonna meet my my brother and he was just so intentional and then he called me out on it because I like made up a reason why I lied like you are about not saying guys it worked it worked out it worked out it worked yeah yeah but my boyfriend does the same like he did the same thing he was like I don't do it I'm like I don't do anything I don't want to do. So if I tell you I want to see you, it's because I want to see you. I was like, damn. Damn. All right. And then he actually did show up and want to see you. The second part. Isn't that? And what's sad about that is that's like so exciting. Right. No, literally. It's like and it worked. He fucking got my ass. He fucking got me. Well, how did you, how has the podcast been? Like, how has it been working together? How has it been like, now that you're in front of the camera, were you ever in front of the camera prior? I came out here to do reality TV, so kind of.

Have you been on anything? Yeah, I came out to do like a singing show on NBC years ago. But like the moment I got here, this is the last. I'm not doing this again. Like there was no part of me. It was like, oh, this is not a life that I want to live. Oh, no thanks.

Yeah. But I was like, look behind the cameras and it's like, why is everybody going to have a Rolex over there? On that side of the camera. And I'm looking over here at people that are all more talented than me, can't pay a water bill. And I'm like, I'm going to go on that side. But remember what's this side?

sides like. Yeah. It's been 10 years. How has the transition back in front of the camera been? How's that been for you? Uh, especially on this like because now it's more like social media. Yeah, I mean, I enjoy it, but also I think it's difficult to not like lose a part of yourself whenever you do either side. Yeah, that's true. And also I don't have any interest in making this the main focus of like my life. And so there's a sense of not like inauthenticity, but there's a sense of like when you don't want to do something forever and you already know that, but you are doing it regularly.

Yeah. Like a little bit like a give and take. Yeah, it's like a balance that you have to strike. I'm curious, like, how's your relationship been on social media? Because I know social media, they love being in our business. Oh, yeah.

So I had a super public relationship in my last relationship, like on the daily vlog grind. So I think when Jammer and I started dating, I like kept him very protected and under wraps and offline for like a solid year before I even like posted anything about him just because I was like,

you know, nervous, scarred from him. from past traumas of being like too chronically online and like letting people in too much the relationship. Yeah, being too available. And I think like the issue with daily vlogs is that like you're editing together like a highlight reel of the relationship. So it's not like an accurate depiction of the reality of the relationship. Yeah, because it's not like a full 360.

It's not a full 360. And not that a podcast is either, but I feel like the conversations that we have together on the podcast. Like even if we broke up tomorrow, I would look back and be like, yeah, like whatever. We're like talking about our opinions on like finances and relationships. You know what I mean? Like, whatever it might be. Like, it just feels a lot more authentic.

Yeah. Where we're sharing just like our general opinions at the same time doing it together, but we're not sharing like this crazy part of a relationship that feels, I don't know, like I feel like we've created. Too intimate. Yeah, too intimate. But anybody who's like one thumb scroll away and watching for four seconds and like gathers an opinion, it is what it is.

But you've been listening for 35 minutes and like anything has said. Like, you obviously are interested enough in like what we are saying. You know, like we'll give the time. So, like, there's a little bit of, I don't know, like, a litmus test of, like, how much do you actually care? Right. And just, like, when there's more context around any conversation, I feel like it's just a little bit, a little bit better as well. Yeah, absolutely. And then that kind of keeps some stuff private.

Yes. The stuff that you want to keep private, you keep private. And then what you want to show you do. Oh, totally. And, like, when I started dating again, I was like, I'm going to find me a man who posts on Instagram twice a year. And I did. And I did. And I did. Like, is his face on the while till nine Instagram?

Like, yeah, obviously. But, like, at Jeremy. Michael 22 post maybe twice a year. It's like our wedding collab post to go to like both of our friends and families. That might be the last one. I don't know. It's literally might be the last post. I was like this is the kind of person that I need to be with.

Because again, I mean, we talked about this. Like sometimes in a relationship like when you're kind of like the one in front of the camera, there's only space for one sometimes depending on the personality. One of you's got to be the star. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and it's also like it's nice to like my boyfriend's the same way. Like I've talked to my other girlfriends in the industry and you know this too

I'm sure. Like you guys have lots of friends too who may be. single right now like but I've told you need a man that's like online enough to like get to get it yeah but not so online that he's like someone to like yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes my boyfriend like he's in your content like yesterday when you know he was like helping promote the tour and you throw like a bucket of your dad throws a bucket of water on him like that's like an amazing way for him to like be a part of it where it's like not so serious but people still get like a

glimpse into like him obviously being like funny and caring and like totally down for the cause yeah obviously he's come on my show with my sister like on two idiot girls and we had fun and we had a blast but like he's not like me like I can yap for hours I could talk sometimes I'll just talk to him and like at him yeah yeah I'm like can I just tell you about this thing like that doesn't matter. And he's like, sure. And he'll just listen to me. I'll talk for 45 minutes straight.

He didn't say anything. He's just going, wow. That's crazy. Like, he's just like, he'll just chime in every now. My favorite is been like, I'll be halfway through that 45 minutes story and just go, just say it. Just say it. And I'll be like, that's crazy.

That's great. Thank you. Like, I'll just, and we can end there. It's fine. The other day, I was like, I was just like a month ago. I was literally, I woke up early because my alarm went off. And then I was obviously checking my phone because I'm an iPad baby. So I'm looking at everything, checking emails, whatever.

And then I start watching videos, like opinions or whatever. And then I watched one and I didn't like it. And it was a mean video about Beyonce's new album. And I loved her new album. So I was like, what the fuck when I watched it? And then I literally woke my boyfriend up. And I was like, hey, are you awake after I wake him up? Yeah.

And he was like, I am now. And I go, can I tell you about something? And he goes, yeah, I talked for 20 minutes straight. Like, I literally was like, and then. And then she said this. And that makes no sense because that was... 35 second video. Yeah, I was just going off.

And then he was just staring at me and he's like, like, listening to me, but his eyes were like barely open. Barely open, yeah. And I was like, you know what I mean? And then he goes, I cannot believe like how many words you have right now. And it was like 6.30. But I feel like, you know, sometimes you just got it. Okay, cool.

That's honestly a great balance. Like if he's someone who's not like annoyed by that because if I tried to pull that shit, he'd punch me in the face. In like a really loving way. No, for sure. No, I don't think I would. Hang on, hang on. The physical abuse thing, probably not, yeah.

No, but like, I would, like, not a morning person. But like, I know that. Like, I wouldn't try and be a yapper at 6.30 in the morning because I know how that would end. I feel like I'm, I can be more of a morning person than you. We disagree. I'm not like a, wake up in the middle of the night and take care of the dog when they puke kind of person.

That I'm not. That's me. That I'm not. Yeah. I have, like, a six sense. Like, I can hear a dog gagging in the crate, and I can get his little, I can hold his ears back,

Get him in a trash can. But I've seen her go from, like, dad to sleep to just, he's going to puke. It's crazy. I have that sense, too. Mother's intuition. Yeah. No, literally, mother's intuition, six cents. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you got, like, meatballs.

Yeah, just two little Lincoln logs just living in. Yeah, yeah. I assume yours aren't that intelligent then? Yeah, no, not at all. No, no. Okay, got it. Not at all. Okay.

Okay. And they're, one of them's completely deaf, and we fostered him for, like, a month. Love that. And then, so my first baby. name is squid and then my second baby's name is tuna. I'll show you a picture of them. Yeah, I'm like, hey, fuck this episode. Yeah, let me show you about babies.

Oh, that's cute. Wait, they look so similar. Yeah, this is squid, this is tuna. Me not even paying attention anymore. Anyways, this is my dogs. Were you like nervous to have to raise a dog that couldn't hear you? Yes, we were very nervous in the beginning. I feel like, well, okay, so squid we've had four, he's now two.

he's now two, which makes me want to kill myself because when he dies, I'm going to. Right. Oh, you have no idea. We have a lifetime insurance, actually. We have one. We have lifetime insurance. Yeah, so ours aren't going. Mine could never be insured if I'm being honest.

Do you not have dog returns? I didn't get it initially, which was a mistake. And now everything's pre-existing. But honestly, within eight months, my baby squid started having problems because he's a Frenchie. that's very normal. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Issues, like, honestly, like,

if you have the time and the money, they're wonderful dogs. Yeah. But if you don't, don't get them. Right, I'm afraid too. Don't get them. Yeah, like, they're not. They, like, struggle to exist, I feel like.

Yeah. Yeah. But he was perfect, like, for the first, like, six to seven months, and then he started having stomach issues. And so, like, now he has, he's, like, I call him, like, my peanut allergy kid.

Like, he's a little bubble boy. Yeah, he has prescription kibble. I'm not kidding. Oh my God, so does moose! on that fucking prescription kibble Dude and that shit I couldn't When I first started putting him on it It's because he was having like regurgitation problems

So he I BS girly same I get it Right right he would vomit like anytime like anything He would eat and then an hour later he would like In it the way it would bomb like I'd take him to the vet and I'd be like something's wrong with him Like I could just keep telling something is wrong with him And they're like oh I could just be just

be a Frenchy thing. I'm like, or he could have cancer. Check. Jesus Christ. Was he okay? He's okay now because I had to take him to a specialist because I took him to literally three different vets and they all kept telling me, oh, it's probably a French thing. And you're like, no, figured out. I was like, I don't believe you and his vomiting is not normal. And so I took him to an actual was he project out? Like, what do you mean his vomiting was a normal?

The vet asked me the specialist. She goes, can you describe the kind of vomiting? Like, like, I was like, okay, have you ever seen the exorcist? No, in her head spins all the around and she vomits black shit. It just shoots out. You know in the beginning of Jurassic Park when that lizard goes, and they goes, that's what it looks like? That's your retirement.

I was like, what's your diagnosis for that shit? Like, I don't know what that is. They're like, great. So we actually have a nun for you. Yeah, we have an exorcist before. On your dog. Yeah, that's when we found out he needs prescription kibble. Yeah.

She's like most French, he probably has a food allergy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like, I'm going to give him this. It's literally vegan kibble. Wow, honestly, I love that prescription. Hydroized protein. H.P. Yes.

Not our dogs being on the same fucking prescription. And that shit's hard to get. Like, you have to buy it from the prescription. Yeah, and you have to, like, submit the prescription script to get the freaking kibble. Yeah. Yeah, I literally ordered. I know this life. I ordered, like, I put it on auto ship now, but I have, like, the giant bags.

Chewy? Yeah. And it's like, it's one of those where it's like, he cannot eat anything else. It has to be that. Damn. And then he can't even eat ice anymore. He used to really love ice. Can't eat ice?

No, that used to be his thing. We used to call them ice cookies. Because he would, every time he hears the ice machine, he would go and sit, and then he'll shake and lay down. We literally just talked to the other day about how we wish that our dogs were excited about ice. Because we fill up our, like, our, like, our, like, stand the cup every morning and, like, drop ice everywhere. And we're like, man, I wish we just had, like, a little dog who was stoked on ice. Are you going to get that? Yeah.

They're like, I just stepped in this. The fuck. No, like, because I, they'll just, oh, what's wrong with you? You sloths. You barn animal. No, yeah. My. squid used to love ice.

He can't even have ice. He can't even have water in a different form. That's so sad. He throws up. Can you believe that? That's crazy. That's insane. That's crazy.

And so he, that's new. Like that's what the last year. Yeah, yeah, water cube is out. I think to myself, though, like the, like pups in natural selection, it's been decades that we've, we've allowed some of the softest boys. I know. They would absolutely die without us. Oh my God. Oh, my God.

The Bull Terrier was bred to be a fighting dog. And I guess it lasted like seven minutes. Not very long. Not very long. They were like, this is the worst. Like they move and almost in slow motion. It's crazy. It's crazy.

They move exactly like, the hunger? I mean, they're not fighting anything. They're like ghosts. Like they just follow. Yeah. They're Velcro to Lauren.

I mean, she leaves and they look at me like, what are you going to do for us? They're like, oh, he's here. Is she coming back? They're like, don't bother. Mom left.

I already checked. They'll like start doing rounds. And then they'll like, I think it's her, they'll see me, they go, oh. Not this guy again. Like my little room. By the way, I'm not going to feed you tonight, guys, so. Be nice to me, I control.

Oh, and I always, extra scoop, extra scoop. He tries to make up for lost time. He's like, how can I win them over right now? I'll buy my loyalty, yeah. Wait, so it's Moose and then what's your other book? Diggy, diggy. Diggy. And so we adopted Moose's dad about two years ago this fall to be two years.

Love. But I got Moose as a puppy, and then. Why did you pick Bull Terrier? I'm curious. I grew up next to a full-size bull terrier who was so sweet. He was just like, so great. He's a little stinky. That's okay.

Loved him. And was like buddies with him. And then when I moved to L.A., there was a mini bull terry who lived in my building in Hollywood, my first year in L.A. And I was like, oh, shit. I was like, it comes in a smaller version. Which is Lauren's, like, favorite thing. Yeah.

A smaller version. A small spoon. A small tabasco. Anything mini? I'm in. I'm in. You're klepto. I'm a little tough.

You're stealing. I'm a little. I do have a small. spoon collection from different restaurants. There's like six of, you have like some apologies to write. Only chains. I would never, I would never clepto from like a small business or a small like family and restaurant, but like if I'm in a cheesecake factory and they bring on a small

spoon, that's just coming home. They can afford it. Yeah. You're coming home. I mean, how many of those aren't being stolen? That's what I'm saying. They're so, I have to be. Yeah, but do we need one more.

Yeah, we do. I have to build the collection out. Whatever. So anyways, met the mini-boltair and I was like, oh, it was like, this is amazing. I also like want to be able to pick up my dog in an, emergency, like, would love to have a bigger dog. Small dog, not for me, because I also don't want to like actually kill it if I trip over it or something. But in an emergency at 40 pounds, I want to be able to scoop you up and go. Yeah, that's, okay, that's a good idea. Just in case of a fire,

you're like practicing, picking them up. Because our dogs are going to fucking, if there's a fire, dead. They're dead. They're dead. They're dead. Just a fire across the street, they're like run to it. That's what I'm saying. Fire in our house running, again, to it. Like, yeah, they're dead. If we don't do something about it. Before we cut tuna, like, we had squid. I would, like, I would just take him around. Like he was a gym dog for a while. Like we got a little stroller for him. That's cute.

And so from like six months we would take him. And so he's really good. And the stroller like, we could like park him in a corner and like walk across the gym. He just sits there and stairs. And then people come and pet him and then he'll lay down and go to sleep. So he's really good in like public and everything. And so we took him to my parents' house because we were all like swimming at my parents' house.

And we were all swimming. And he walks up and like Brittany was swimming with us. And we were like, Oh, it's high squid. And he just runs and launches himself into the pool. He's never once swam. He's never been around water. He was like, love this extension of grounds.

Yeah, and he sank straight to the bottom. Right. Like a cannonball. Like a cannonball. Like a cannonball. What would have happened if no one's there? I just think to myself. Again, daddy?

I have, yeah. And he, mind you, he's been to my parents' house many times. He's been in the backyard many times. He's not once ever did that. I don't know what the hell came over him. Again, an exorcism. And like, when he was sinking, I was like, grab him, grab him. And so we picked him up.

And he's all like, he's scared, obviously. But he was fine once we put him on the sidewalk. And then Brittany was like, well, he just jumped with so much confidence. I thought he had done it before. But also he's never swam. Never. Ever. Never.

Never. Never. Ours rolled into the pool last weekend. Literally rolled it. And like they love like baking in the sun, like being like little baked potatoes. One of the biggest fears that we're going to send our dogs to daycare and they're not going to remove themselves from the outside. Again, dead. Dead.

Dead. Like the doors unlocked. It's wide open and they just refuse to go inside. I'm like, please, please go get some air conditioner She even goes, please. Hey, can I speak to someone of the manager? Can you just make sure he just doesn't cook for too long?

Yeah, yeah, could you limit his sun exposure? He won't go inside, so please. You might need to reapply his sunscreen. A helicopter mom. These aren't jokes. These aren't jokes. No, you have no idea how serious this is. I'd like to have a meeting with you, please.

Before I dropped the mom. Her mom is, I think, beginning to become concerned she won't have enough time for a real child because of the dogs. Because of the dogs. Between like the six cents of the yaking and like the sunscreen application, it's a full-time job.

Oh, you actually put sunscreen on them. Oh, dead ass. Again, not jokes. Not jokes. I thought you were getting it. No, yeah, yeah, yeah. No jokes. I didn't even know they made dogs sunscreen.

Yeah. Well, like, for dogs that, like, don't have a ton of fur. They don't really have fur, like, on the top of, like, their snoot. And, like, you know, the snoot. It's all snoot, and it points straight up at the sun. So, like, it really does need, like, a little layer of SPF. All seven people that are left. Guys, I know.

I'm so sorry for the riveting conversation. You're like, when he's 40, he's going to have wrinkles. So I have to make sure that SPF has rubbed in Yeah, I adopted tuna my boyfriend and I Because Oh, did you get them together? No, we had squid for like a year And some change before we got tuna But the reason why we got tuna

Because we were entertaining the idea of another dog But then I started getting super busy Yeah And so we were like, I don't know about two Like we knew we wanted to get another Frenchie But squid because he was an only child He started like, he's the perfect dog Like he's so good around humans.

Was he acting out? He never barks, nothing. No, it's just anytime he was around other dogs, he would just get so excited. Like it's never aggressive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like too excited. He's annoying. Like, he'd be like, you know what I mean?

Like he's just over. Literally me as a child. When I like finally, only child like, I'm like, oh my God, friends, stimulation. Let's go. Peers. Yeah. Interaction, social interaction. He had social interaction with other children my age.

Let's fucking go. Yeah. And I was like, dude, I feel like he's a homeschool kid and he's not socialized properly. Like I was like, I need. to socialize him. I was like that window is closing and then he's going to be annoying like we're going to be that couple with a dog that can't be around other dogs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And a lot of my family and friends have other dogs like, and they would just get so annoyed with squid because he just wants to play. And Frenchies have

a lot of energy and they love to like do the little nipping and the biting, which is not aggressive biting, but not all dogs like that energy. Totally. And so I was like, okay, I don't want him to like try to play and they get attacked or something. So like, we need to get him a friend. Like I was like, I need to get him a fucking friend. So we could socialize. And you got a one that was deaf, which is strategic. Exactly.

That was actually so smart. Yeah. Honestly, we had no idea he was deaf. I, like, found him on a website, and then I, like, message the guy. But I wrote that, like, we already have a Frenchie. I know that they're high maintenance. I know they have problems. Like, we're more than equipped to take care of him.

This one's, like, actresses. Yeah. Yeah. I get it. Trust me, I've mastered it. Yeah. And then the guy even told me, he was like, honestly, the reason why I picked you guys was because you said you have a Frenchie and you understand their high

maintenance. because I you know but when we went to go meet him at the dog park he was so cute like you know like he was a man taking the pictures and so like they were really awful pictures like they're like from super far away they're really dark no any justice they're all their worst angles yeah yeah yeah yeah I was like showing the pictures to my family and they were like oh because he like looks like so cute so cute and I hope it works out because I was like excited I'm telling you I have a good feeling about and then when we met him my boyfriend was like he's way cute and then I thought he was going to be,

because the pictures were so baffled. Yeah. And then when we're... But it's almost hard at this point. Yeah. The iPhone is... The iPhone is so good. So good.

To intentionally take a bad phone. It was crazy. You would work really hard for that. You have less and less excuses. One was from like a hundred yards away it felt like. He was done a plane across the room and he just like took it. And so we met him, he goes, yeah, you know, he hasn't really had any problems. Like he had one issue with his back, but he's good now and blah, blah, we're like, okay.

And then he goes, also, I can't confirm this, but I think he's deaf. Okay. And I go. you think he's death and he goes I just have a feeling I go why and he I was like have you gotten him to take tested to get tested for it and he goes yeah but the reason why I took him was because on 4th of July like where he lived there was like a huge fireworks thing and so a lot they always send out things to people with dogs right yeah yeah yeah huge fireworks show and he said he didn't wake up once like he wasn't moved could just be unbothered right that's what I said yeah

and then I was like because I thought squid was deaf turns out he just didn't like listening well that's we've got one of those here actually actually It has that same quality. It's crazy. Same with the fireworks, they're just like, they don't enjoy your night. Yeah, but like the crack of a banana from 300 feet away.

No, because Jeremy really did think that like, Diggy, our new dog had hearing issues. He was like, I really think there's something wrong. And I was like, bitch, fucking sit down and watch this. And literally I put a piece of toast in the toaster. He's upstairs. The toaster pops, it's like,

dingh, and Dickie, you hear the little paws coming towards you. And I was like, sit down. I was like, sit down. No, and so he said the same thing. And I'm like, well, he could just be a bad listener. And he's like, okay. So when I took him, we fostered him for like a couple weeks before we adopted him. And I took him to our vet.

And I was like, just did like a whole little physical. And then I told him about the hearing thing. I was like, I am a little concerned. And then the guy told me when he took him to the vet, it's not affecting his quality of life. So, you know, he was saying like, it's probably not worth getting a test because it's like $400 or whatever to get a hearing test. And they just can tell you yes or no. Right. There's no cure.

You can't stand on that side and I'll stand on this side and not clap. Well, that's why my vet was like, well, I can test. it and so he like the bag of the favorite food behind him see if he does this literally cracker bag of chips well he like he slammed something down on the counter and that made him look but it's like he feels vibrations so then he had me drop it behind him and it was like a big tin and it made a loud ass noise like a clang he didn't move not all he goes yeah he's deaf he's dead that's $400 the results are in you get like 40 bucks would be great yeah well ours um picked up

epilepsy week like week three week four No, no, no, he had had a seizure, like a year before we adopted him. And they, like, were super open about it. And we're like, here's all his medical records or whatever. Yeah. Well, they also said he liked baths. Can't confirm fucking hate to bath. So we're like, okay, what's true?

What's, like, not true? Yeah. Trying, you know, sorting through the facts there. Like the first bath, you're going to love this. He's like, what the fuck? Literally, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's all doing that. Yeah, I got hurt. I'm like, oh, yeah, we really fucking love this.

Love's back, huh? Thanks, Kathy. And so we I think maybe it was probably in his first year that he did have a seizure and says he, but like just one. We're chilling. It's all good. Just a little bit. We don't have other hobbies, so we're not in pickleball. Yeah, we're like books. For real.

I was like, and when we brought him home, like they meshed well. Him being deaf has worked out tremendously. I feel like there's benefits to that. Yeah, he's absolutely, and I can confirm he is for sure deaf. Like he absolutely is. I think the old guy probably could do. He just didn't want to spend the money to get him to test, which I get. So I was like, well, he's better.

It's better now. It worked out. Thankfully, like, he has completely 180'd squid. Like, squid is so chill with other dogs now, like, because now he has someone. Because they would, like, W. WWE wrestle on my couch for, like, 20 minutes straight. But it's, like, slow motion, like, just two hippos being like, ooh. And then they take 10 minute breaks in between.

And yeah. To sleep for an hour and a half. Is he older or younger? Tuna's actually younger than Squid. Got it, okay. So he's probably, I think Squids too, and he's like right behind him, so he's like one and a half.

Yeah. So they're like right up against each other. But they're like perfect boys, two little sausages. They love each other. Now they're in a real bestie phase. Oh. Squid was in a real like,

I'm gonna WWW wrestle this bitch every single day. Like every single day, Squid was like, ah, ah, ah. And because Tuna is deaf, it doesn't bother him as much. Right.

So the so he just lets him bite him and he's just going and he's like, just over and over and over again till he got tired enough and now they're besties. I'm not entirely sure ours are aware that the other exists yet. They coexist so peacefully. What does they think they're like reflection? Yeah, like they're like and like walk away. You're like what? Do they ever play?

They don't ever play? No, they do. They'll do W.W. Smackdown on our couch for like about 60 seconds once a day and then again sleep for four hours and that's kind of That's kind of it for like acknowledging each other's existence. Yeah. Like they'll wake up at the morning and like sniff each other and be like, oh, are you guys meeting for the first time right now? Like what's going on here?

Like did you forget that you also live with this dog for last time? That's why I said that. Maybe they think that's me. Well, that's me. That's just me. Yeah. That's me. They have enough self-awareness.

Aren't you like you're raising something with your boyfriend just to like get a sense for what he does and doesn't care about in that like style? Yeah, like he's all about food. Like he does their food and everything. the one thing my boyfriend like just struggles with severely is dog shit I don't know what it is about shit like it truly makes him gag so violently like nothing grosses him out really

nothing like like he would rather clean like human vomit than clean dog shit which I don't get really oh I'm on reverse on that me too me too is that are you like that too I don't I've never thought to myself I'd rather clean human vomit I've never been like yeah that's that's the bullshit well me personally I like to clean human vomit

But I was like, I would have to clean a toilet in a kitchen. That's tea. Jeremy, brain cells, and he walks in the kitchen, brain cells exiting. God, spoon, can't, no thoughts. No thoughts. No thoughts. No vibes. No vibes.

She's not kidding. It's crazy. For such an intelligent man, it is crazy. Do you just not like cooking or do you not like cleaning? Oh, I don't cook. I don't cook at all. That's not going to happen. No one wants to eat it.

No one. It's a lose-lose if you cook. Oh, it's a lose-lose. But I come back sometimes from having seen the mess that I left and I go, what happened? You're like the Hulk. Like when I were done eating, did I just go? You just leave.

Literally just leaves. And I walk out, I'm like, what the fuck is this tornado? Is the help going to take care of it that we don't have? The kitchen elf. It's me. It's me. I am the kitchen elf. I'm aware that this is annoying.

Why am I doing this? I haven't stopped doing it. I do want to be clear that although Jeremy cannot, cannot literally function whatsoever in the kitchen, all of our tech stuff and like security of our house, like we have a very, like, balanced household, I'd say. So, like, I don't want to, like, rag on him, yeah. No, your strengths. I get that.

Like, Dave, week two, you were like, you take the trash out. Okay, that's your, that's your job. That's a youth thing. That's a you thing. Although, I did get the trash out last night. I know, I heard that. I know. I'm so welcome.

That's so nice. I literally, uh, my boyfriend loves to cook. Like, he prefers to cook. I don't. So that works out. No, that's perfect. Yeah, that's perfect. You say, like, you just like hang in, yeah.

Yeah. The problem is Lauren doesn't like to cook. So you guys were at a real crossroads. We're on that like, we're on that meal delivery service situation. Oh, I feel that. Yeah. That's one of the greatest curses of this is the opportunity to eat out every fucking day.

Yeah. It is a privilege. Don't get me wrong. But it is a curse in a lot of ways. My fridge was like a drink fridge. My sister kept calling it the drink fridge because there was no food in there. And a college frat guy? Yeah, because every time I buy food, I'm gone for weeks.

The shit goes bad. It's a waste of money. Throw it out. Like, so then I'm like, I can't buy groceries because I'm just gonna, they're gonna go bad. Yeah. But it's because I would grocery shop like how I did before I did this, which is like, you know, you buy for the week or you buy for a couple weeks. Oh, your produce, your bread.

Yeah, but now I have to buy for in like two day increments. Yeah. I literally shop, grocery shop like I'm going to have to go on the run in like a couple days. Just in case. I have to Jason Bourne like exit. Just in case. Just is my go bag. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I literally get up. But she loves the grocery store. I love the grocery store. You do? I love the grocery store. Just grocery shopping in general, just the vibes.

in there. Yes. Yes. What's your favorite grocery store? Um, love a Whole Foods, but I also love a Ralph's. I love Ralphs.

I love Ralphs. People really shit on Ralphs and I'm like, guys, this is where the deals are. I love Ralphs. Ralphs, Vaughn's, Stater brothers.

Because I don't like, like I love Whole Foods. I feel like they're like Pratt food is so great. But I also want to be able to like buy the shittiest most like fake bag of chips in the world and like someplace like a whole food. You can't do that. I know. All that healthy shit.

Yeah. It's like, Get it away for me. Give me like the face ship with a preservative. You need a balance. And I feel like Ralph's really serves it up. Oh, I tried the Haley Bieber smoothie for the first time. Oh, how was it?

Like a week ago or so. Like draw down an investment. Yeah, yeah. I had to take out a second mortgage and then I got it. Yeah. But it honestly, it's pretty good. Yeah, that's what I hear. I haven't heard one parent, I'm like, this is gross.

No, it's pretty good. Like I was like, you know what? This bitch kind of ate with this smoothie. Like, is it $30? Yeah, is that insane? Yeah. Did I try it? Of course I did.

I think to myself, if I had a smoothie named after me, one, it wouldn't be $30. And two, would it be good? I'm not sure. I think one of the things is, like, people have like, you like this? I feel like the consensus, like, it's expensive, but it's really good. Yeah. You can imagine it's like, oh, it sucks and it's expensive? And it's expensive?

Yeah. It's one of, it's like I was, I saw TikTok, because obviously I've been seeing people talking about it for like the last year. Totally. And I hadn't tried it ever. And then I saw one TikTok of two grown men being like, can I tell you something? Yeah, they're like, that bitch knows her way about. Around the lender.

I saw that one and I go, all right, I'm convinced. I gotta try it. This is the involuntil that got me. Yeah, I've been in coincidence. Because neither of them wanted to like it. No. They didn't want to be able to go, this is stupid. Yeah.

That is the most candid review. Yeah. And I went and I tried it and it was good. It was very, very delicious. There's a couple things I feel like that I've really changed Jeremy's life. Like not only like now being his wife. Like obviously that was like a life change as well too. But the two things, I feel like I got him off Carmex and onto Aquifer.

Okay, T. One. Carmex is. I had no idea that I was putting salt in my lips. This man. This man was drinking lukewarm room tamp water and I got them with Stanley and I was like welcome to the world I love a stanley water for 48 hours at a time it's just not me and the girls walk around without jugs of water It's wonderful me and the girls I told when I saw those stanleys like when they first started getting popular

I told my sister I was like I think I need to try that white girl cup I need to try that shit I need to try it They're eaten with that I said that white girl cup I need to try it and I did and now I have fucking four of them like yeah They're good. The things that I would get out of bed for once I'm already in, walk all the way downstairs, walk all the way back when I have water sitting to my left. But it's not as cold. Oh, I love it. You've been right about a couple things.

That and sunscreen? Who would have thought? Crazy. I said a couple of things. I know there's stuff like that I've put my boyfriend on too. Is he skincare? Does he do skincare? He loves skincare, yeah, like now.

Can I ask you a question though? What does he put you on to? Ooh, that's a good question. I'm like nothing, I'm perfect. I'm blank. You're like, I was actually fully cooked when I met him. Yeah, I was actually flawless when I met him. Don't make me ask your family.

I honestly, I'm trying to think. Like, as far as products go, I really don't know. Because when I first started doing my boyfriend and I went in his room for the first time, it was really clean. But he had like one, his bed. It was like pushed in the corner. And then one lamp. Man, I don't know.

And then when we moved in together, I was like, okay, so I want to rearrange some things. I'd like to get in from the bed. Blacksheets. aside. Don't like that. And then I was like, we need to move the bed. And he was like, well, where? And I go in the middle so I can get up. And he was like, oh, like, does it have to be like that? And I go, well, I'm not a teenager. So I'm not going to roll off my bed. You want me to scoot to the end and get off? But I'm not doing that. Did he want to just like climb over you to? Like what? No, he was like, oh, go on that side. I was like, hey, we're adults. We can have in the bed. Yeah. And I was like, we need one of these. And I'm talking about end tables. And he goes, for what? And I go for the side of the bed. And he

was like I know but what what is it hold and I was like your things like where do you plug in your phone he goes I just plug it in and put it on on the window sill next damn what built in got yeah he was like I already have it and I was like well I don't have one so we're buying end tables yeah I think by like this like the single mother who raised me like instilled a few of those things yeah because I had he had great furniture but I watched a department I was like I was like oh this is a fully cooked man who like knows how to find it's funny because my boyfriend was raised by single mom. Yeah. Oh, it's right. Yeah, but he, it's just like furniture. It's like extra shit, like, decor, like shit that like makes a home a home. You know what I mean? There was

up on my walls. There was white. And there was, that's where it's, it was never going to be on the wall. Like, was there a throw blanket? Yes. But like, aren't too far. You hated my throat blankets. It was just not soft. So it's like, why I get a throw blanket if it's not going to be soft? It's warm. Find me the logic. When I first moved in with my boyfriend, too, I was like living, oh, this was right before COVID. So I had like moved in and then I had to stay there because of COVID. But I was with his family. So his brother lived in the house at the time.

And obviously because I'm moving in, I like have all of these products and like I have them all in the drawer and everything. And because I'm a Virgo, I know when my shit is touched. Right. And my boyfriend. Yeah. So I would go in there and I would see things out of order and I was like, somebody's been here.

And I would tell my boyfriend and I'm like, I think your brother's using my stuff. And then he was like, like what stuff? And I go like my skin care. Like my shirt. Like what stuff? Yeah. It was like my serums and my moisturizers and all that. And I go and I don't care.

But where's he putting it? Because I'm putting it on my face. So I just want to know. Great question. I literally found out like he was like, like he's in a fucking Nordstrom. He's just like, well. But don't you just like see a video of him by himself going, huh? He's just,

he was literally just sampling everything because they had never like done stuff like that before. Like my boyfriend used to just put baby lotion on his face and that's it. Okay. Perfect skin, by the way. Yeah, fuck you. Yeah, what fuck's that about? Yeah, must be nice. Can't relate to that.

Literally, like, dabs his wet, like, water washed face off with the same towel that he wipes his balls with. Perfect skin. Perfect skin. What's that about? Must be fucking nice. Yeah, I was like, what thing? That's not true. That's slanderous.

I have one pimple in his leg. Hasn't touched a serum, hasn't touched a lotion. I will say, start wearing censoring at 32. I'm 32. I've neglected my facial everything. And that's because you guys have perfect skin. I didn't used to, though. Didn't used to.

But also he's white. So I'm like, you've got to step this up now. Or else he's going to go downhill quick. You're staring down the barrel, girl. Yeah, you're staring down the barrel girl. I did notice that, like, other, like, white dude couples with Asian women. And I'm like, you look terrible. If it gets too far, then it starts looking like, like, I'm a male order bribe.

It's always the guy. Tea. I mean, when's the last time you saw, like, oh, the white guy looks great at 80. And his Asian guy doesn't. His wife looks awful. Show me one. It's not going to happen. I'm not going to be the .

You're not getting me like that. So yeah, I now go to her Botox doctor to try and just keep me frozen in time. To keep the eyebrows at the level they're supposed to be. Is that what your 11s? I forget. No, that's your 11s, I think. I don't even know. I've never gotten Botox.

Have you ever gotten Botox? I've never gotten them. Yeah. I really want to try the sweat ones. Oh, I almost got that. Okay, so I've heard though that like if it stops the sweat in that area, but it'll find a new place to come out. Which really scares me.

That's like rolling the dice on on like a gamble that I don't know if I'm going to take. Like it will redirect it. Like somewhere even weirder. Somewhere even weirder. Yeah. Like my forearms, my like elbow pits are just like perspiring. And I'm like, I don't know about this. It's your back.

The center of your back. Oh, I would die. Because I'm a sweaty girl, like I get hot really easily. Same, same. Yeah. So I, and I sweat the most like on my hairline and like my neck area. Ooh, that feels so hot too. Oh, yeah.

And it's the first place people look. So when I'm sweating, they're like, it's hot out here, huh? And I'm like, I'm actually cold. I'm actually shivering. I'm shivering. If you were to like, remember like the show Room Raiders? Yes. Uh, yeah.

Let's go back. If you were like go into our room and look at the bed and go, I wonder which side the the six foot four kind of hairy dude sleeps on. And you would think that it was hers for sure. Yeah, yeah. I'm a sweaty girl. But I'm also on like anti-anxiety medication and that makes that, like it makes it really. And don't you feel mean?

That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's so able to you. So thanks for violating my HIPAA rights anyways. Yeah, you definitely have more temperature issues than I do. Yeah, but it really fucks with your like regular.

If you're hot or if you're cold and you walk by the temperature on the wall. This is a hot take here in our household. If it was 72 degrees and you wanted to make it cooler, what are you turning it to? I turn it to like 69, 68. Let's say it was like, let's say you already at 69. Okay. And let's say, oh, you know, it's too cold in here. I like it to be warmer.

What would you turn it to? 70 probably right because that's that's that's normal thing Lauren does like crank one way like 80 or the other no no no but like I'm going extreme like even in the car it's like either the AC is at 10 or it's at 10 like there's like no or zero it is like there's just no finesse there's nothing there's nothing in the middle it's one way or the other my boyfriend actually runs really hot too hotter than me like honestly he's what's easier than I do so like living together too I've had to really adjust like comforters like sheets like I have to get comforters that are cool enough but

still warm. Can we talk about sheets actually? Oh there we go. Like jersey sheets are too hot for him. Oh yeah there's no world like I could do a jersey seat. Yeah I would be French. But do you both you can like a tuck a sheet is a nurse's corner is that what it's called? Oh like the nurse's corner or do you hate the nurse's corner? Is that the one where it's like it does not move? Yeah. I like that on a sheet. I hate a flat sheet like one that goes on top. of the fitted sheet. Let's fucking go. That's all the time we have to visit there.

Thank you so much for watching. We'll see you next week. I think flash sheets are so pointless. Get out of my face. I don't need it. So you're telling me that you're sweating directly into the comforter. No barrier. Right.

So the both of you are just too water-coiling and it just goes into the comforter every week, week over week, year after year. Down with the fucking flat sheet. When you could just have that one little sheet that you put that into the washer, and the everything else just stays so fresh. You know what's funny? the flat sheet goes on my bed when I'm washing the other sheet

and I forgot to change the load or something. And that flat sheet's always clean because I never use it. Yeah. So I just throw that bitch on there. Oh, oh, I feel so good about this. I feel so... Feeling validated. Feeling validated. Support group out there. I just, I don't understand why you wouldn't want to keep...

It's right there. It's right there. Like, wouldn't you want to keep it? Right. Because that's what civilized humans do. I... I... Where did it? What is it wrong? I feel, I don't like feeling constricted, like I gotta have a leg out again, like I run hot.

Like I gotta be able to kick a Lego and get it over on top of the computer and stuff. And the flat sheet's too heavy? No, but he tucks it and he wants me to be in a fucking asylum of flat sheet tucked into the sides. I don't know because it'll just be kicked out over the week. Yeah, I kick it out. Eventually I'll get into bed and like, it's just the bottom of the corner of the bed and I'm just like, okay, I'll just... Listen, I don't take responsibility for what happens when I'm like... You guys are passively putting the sheet on and on kicking it off.

You have no, every night. It's a battle. Mind you, we have that eight sleeve thing which like that, changes the temperatures for both sides. Oh, nice. Yeah, so, like, you would think that we'd be able to, like, cohabitate there. It's also not as soft because I have, like, a cooling blanket that I also use. And so I want to touch that. She's got the heat up with the cooling blanket.

Walk me through that. And it works, okay? You're curating a vibe when you go to sleep. Yeah, thank you. You're carrying an energy bill. Thank you. My God. We have solar.

It's fine. So do I? Yeah. See? I feel like the, yeah, my boyfriend doesn't really care about the flag. I don't think he's never told me listen if this man didn't have end tables he's fine by that's true that's how I know you guys one day you're gonna have that conversation sure and but circle back please I know he's he starts to like he'll develop like really

weird like things now which I'm like oh now you care about that I've been with you for seven fucking years and he never gave a shit about that I forget the one he told me the other day it was something I like I just never put back I can't remember what it was he's like when you do this you have to put it back which I am always doing that to him I'm like, hey, hey. Hey, do you mind just maybe? Oh, here's one for him that I like truly, it drives me nuts. It's like he takes the razor out.

Mind you, we have two. Right. Right. For obvious reasons. But then sometimes if there's only one in there, we share it. But he'll take it out and use it to shave, but then won't put it back in there. And I don't notice till I'm like balls deep in my everything shower. Then I have to get out dripping wet and I have to creep over there and look for the fucking razor.

Yeah. And then I'm like, you didn't put the razor back. He's like, oh, I'm sorry. Every fucking time. That and there's a hand towel in my kitchen. I have like two hand towels hanging on the stove. Yep, yep. He uses the same one every time.

I don't know why it's that one. That's like his favorite one. And he uses it and then he puts it on. Explain ourselves to you. And then he puts it on the counter. Put it back. Yeah, and I'm going and I literally, the other day I go,

if I like, I don't care how much time has passed every time you use this. Like I know it was you because it's in this exact spot. Like you could take half a second longer. How did you know? How did you? I had a,

your calling card was here. You have, and you made it very clear to me early on, the sink should always look as it's never been used. Have you tried to clean dried cheese off of the bottom of the sink? This sink should look like it came from Lowe's. Today. Just installed. Today.

Within the hour. Today. The moment you get done washing your hands with that. When he lets a scrambled egg die in the sink and cook on there for like two days, I'm like, I, It's that. And then this is actually one that we haven't talked about and I'm so excited that we can debut this on the podcast right now

is that after he showers. So we have like in our closet, we've got a middle island that's got drawers. But like we always have, we both have like, we both like throw, you know, like it's like the corner chair in the bedroom that just like gets shit tossed on top. Yeah, like laundry. So we both like.

And that's all the time we have for today again. We both have a bad habit of like throwing like, you know, t-shirt, shorts, whatever on top. Then after he showers, he leaves his wet towel on top of both of our shit. It's not even just my shit, it's his shit, too. His soggy ass towel. And so it's like, if there's... My man does the same fucking thing.

Five pieces of clothing. It's like, you just made all that shit damp. Why? Why? I don't love the things that I do. It's like, you just fucked up all of our shit. Like, for what? But you're like, come over here and feel these. Do those feel dry?

You give us a sniff right here. It's giving moist. I admit, I can even do better that. But the winds the last time I failed to follow the key that you gave me the dishwasher. So she wants, she, there's a very specific place that she wants all the force. She has like a key for a map. Yeah.

So the forks go back left, the spoons go front right. And then you got the knife section and then you've got like the like ladles and things and they must go in there one. And you cannot get them out of order. You know why? Because I'm the kitchen elf. Who unloads the dishwasher? So it's like, just keep the fucking orcs together. But like, like, in like the rug. Just keep them together.

Now, of course, every once in a while, like, her assistant or like, someone will be at the house, whatever, and like, I'll see a rogue fork. He's like, uh, sit down. She is not going to be happy when she sees that. I'm going to tell you this once, okay? And you're going to want to hear from me, not her, okay? Allow me to be the messenger. Do you have an hour? Because if she sees that fork.

Do you like coming here? You like working, yeah? Okay. I do pretty good. You do a great job with the, with the colory. I could do better with the soggy towel. The soggy towel. I got to just, I don't know if I'm going to remember.

But I'm gonna try. I tossed it on the floor. I'm like, this is yours to deal with later. It's not gonna fuck up my clothes. I wonder why it always does make it to the floor. Yeah. It's crazy.

You're like, I've sworn I put this on top of Lauren's clothes. On top of the dress that she's wearing to the wedding that we're going to this weekend. I swear I made this damp. Yeah, when people ask like how is life like post wedding? Like this is the conversation we should just present them.

Oh, I thought of something my boyfriend fucking hates that I do. I just remembered as you, as you were talking right now. Um, we sometimes share like shirts, like big graphic t-shirts and stuff. Oh yeah. I'm familiar with that. Yeah.

All my shirts are her shirts. Yeah, we share a lot of clothes. And so like, he hates when I take off his shirts and I like stretch the neck to put it so it doesn't rub my makeup. And he's like, please don't do that. Like it's something like even if it's a little like this, he goes, throw it in the trash. I don't need it. I hate it. I hate it.

And I'm like, why? And he's like, you stretch the neck out. I can't wear it anymore. I'm like, it's not even stretched out. Also, I feel like that's the lesser of two evils between foundation. Thank you. Foundation marks or stretched neck. He's just like, that's your shirt now.

Never mind. Why are we picking between these two options? Because those are the fucking two options. That's the reality of the situation. Notice how when you walk in the closet, there's a left side and her right side. Left is mine. Left is ours. The whole closet's ours.

What's mine is yours? Happy marriage, baby. She shrunk a hoodie early on, and that was the last time any laundry of mine was done by her. My boyfriend's really particular about laundry. Not particular. We just like the clothes and look like what they look like and put them in the washing and dryer Oh, and I'm like fuck a color Put it all in there, it's fine

And you all go Unless if it's not white If it's not white, it all goes in together Oh, white? Oh, she's just waiting for something bad to happen But socks though, I'll just throw them in there Oh yeah, I don't care And my boyfriend's like the socks are like blue no Yeah, because you're my bombes

You're welcome, have a little color My precious bombas They're $97 a pair They are so expensive Yeah, and I have very few things I enjoy in this life and that's one of them still. No, honestly they'll highly recommend fucking up the laundry early on in the relationship if you don't want to hear your man's laundry. I remember she goes, I watched your, your head, oh, you dry it? Yeah, on high.

Okay, that's great. Well, of course I did. Yeah, no, yeah, of course I watched and dried it, babe. It was it, it was, as if like, yeah, and I'm like, oh, okay, cool. Is that a problem? No, no, no, no, that's great. But that's your sweater now. Well, also like, you don't You can drag another. Me? Yeah, like you own not, like... I don't want to buy clothes that need to be dry cleaned. Yeah.

You're still me. Yeah. I don't want to buy clothes and I'm like, I don't need it. Someone else will do it. You didn't have to do it. You still have to go out of your way to like schedule the drop off and the picket. I don't even, I don't want... I don't need it.

Yeah. I don't need it. I don't need it. The other thing my boyfriend really gets irritated about is lint. Oh. Oh. That's interesting. Because she's never like emptied the lint drawer.

Okay, okay. I have a concession. You must not mind it. When I lived in Toronto, okay, so when I first moved into like my university residence, like it was just communal laundry machines and someone's changing the lint. Wasn't me because I didn't know there was a fucking lint catcher. I had no idea. My mom did my laundry until I moved out in high school.

And that's just her being honest. And I'm just being honest. Do you have eyes? I couldn't see it. Didn't know where it was. So eventually I like am living on my own in Toronto, my fourth university and my boyfriend of the time was like, he's like, this is like, my shit's not getting dry. like what's going on there had been a year and a half worth of fucking lint in this lint catcher it was one of those ones that's like a plate that gets inserted oh yeah into the dryer and you pull it out and it's all there.

The fact that I had not set that apartment on fire is so incredible. That happened in the first house I lived with my boyfriend because he wasn't changing the lint trap either. But it's because we got a different washer and dryer and he thought, I don't know if he just thought, well, this one doesn't have one. Okay. That's what I'm saying.

It's that one, that sneaky one that lays flat and flush. And we stayed with them. And that's on y'all. They ran. That's on star lives, Jeremy. I don't have an issue with us. Yeah. Well, that, and then I, I remember like, I don't know, month three of us hanging out, me maybe moving

in probably at that point. I look up at like the air filter and I go, it's awful black. It's dirty as hell. When's the last time you changed that? None of my business. And she goes, what do you mean that? That great? That's screwdriver to the wall?

Oh, that was here when I moved in. I don't know anything about that. I just think of myself, you would just be eating just toxic air. Highway ass. Breathing in asbest. Freeway L.A. ass. It's the air that I'm breathing. But I feel like between the two people, you just bring them together, like you, you make up

for the other person's idiot. And I agree. And that's my idiot. Yeah, you train, you train, you trade brain cells. Right. Yeah. You're like, because then sometimes I'll, I'll do things for my boyfriend. I'm like, you don't know this? Like, yeah. And then sometimes he does that for me too. Well, we have that, but I sometimes I go, is that a Canadian thing? And I used to, I used to, I used to believe that, like, some of these most, like, just atrocities to just the world were just like a normal thing somewhere else. And then, like, I would speak to anybody else who's Canadian. They're like, that's not a thing.

You should have just started saying it was. She told me their money smelled like maple syrup. Someone told me that once. So Canada rolled out these like plastic bills. You said someone told me and you told him for a fact. And I was like, yo, you know what I heard today? And she goes, so they rolled out this new bill. This new bill.

And I was like, tell me. It was like this new like plastic one. And I was like, I heard if you scratch the maple it smells like maple syrup. So what did I do at the next meeting, filled with a bunch of Canadian executives? Guys, you'll never guess I learned about your money. And like you could tell they were being so nice.

They looked to me just like, you're like, oh. No, that's not a thing. You might want to go tell your Canadian girlfriend. You're all, fuck, Warren. I mean, you look so silly in my meeting. Whoops. Whoops. Girl, well, I didn't say it was a fact.

I just said I heard it. I heard from this person. So I saw TikTok. Yeah, I might have hyped it up too much. Who do you think is the more social one out of you? You, her, her, her. Yeah, that's me. It's me.

I think my battery's done. Yeah, that's my boyfriend too. I used to be an extrovert. Really? Now I don't want to see anyone. That's not true. I do want to see people. It's just like I don't want to see people in the way that I used to see them.

That's fair, though. That's fair. I think that's just getting older, to be honest, maturing. Yeah. I feel that. You always find the time. At the end of the day, I hear about all the conversations you've had. And I just, how?

We're like, I'm inbox zero. He's inbox 14,000. Like, we like navigate that very differently. I don't, I believe, like, you gotta get, if I don't get, you don't, you don't see it. Yeah. What meant to be. Yeah. I know.

When I, like, when I first started dating my boyfriend, because we knew each other in high school, um, I thought he was like me. Like me. Like me. Like me. Yeah. I am so like, again, a yapper to my fucking core. I could talk for hours with no one in the room.

I could just talk about myself. And he cannot relate to anything less. Like, and I found that out as we were dating because I was like, damn, you're, you're, you're, literally nothing like me at all. Like I thought you were like me and you're not. Two years later. You know what I realized? Yeah.

I was like, you actually hate talking, which is true. Even when we would walk in the grocery store like past like Girl Scouts or whatever or even kiosk in the middle of them all, he always puts me on that side because he doesn't want to talk. No, hold on now. Actually.

So I can interact. She puts me on that side. She would make me talk to the Girl Scout and say no, we're good today. That's like I don't have it in me. I don't have it. I just don't, I don't know. I would be the one that has to do like the interaction with the public.

But I don't, But as far as like being social, that's, like, if we're going to, like, go to a dinner or something, I've organized it. But if there's, like, a hard email to send, I'm sending it. If there's a call that's a little awkward. No, a hard email I can do, but, like, phone confrontation, I'd rather die. Really? Oh, my God. Like, a hard phone conversation. Like, communication with, like, friends stuff I'm totally fine with, but, like, if I had to, like, fire someone or, like, ask an uncomfortable question via phone, would rather die. But, like, by uncomfortable, like, you know, confirming.

Or if I, like, had to, like, ask for a raise. Like, even something like that. Yeah. So I ask for all her raises. Good balance. I call Mr. YouTube and I say, hello. Hello. May I have a higher CPM?

Thank you so much. That's me. I'm, I sometimes literally just go like, I was like, we should just talk on the phone. Like, because I don't know if you guys could guess this about me, but I am very confrontational in a lot of ways. Well, you. It's on your life.

Yeah. Yeah. Isn't that shocking? My boyfriend's not like that at all. He's very like, whatever. And I'm like, no, no, it does matter. It does matter. Hang on.

Get back here. Yeah. And I'm always like, no. No, actually he doesn't want that. Like I'm always that person. Aren't you glad that only one of you is like that? Absolutely. I couldn't date me.

I'd kill myself. Same. I think you're crazy. Insane for putting up for this. Oh, to date you. Yeah. I don't know what's wrong with it. Well, you know, pros and cons.

That's your fault. I'm not going to do it. You're all too late. We're married. Yeah, too late. Here we are. Okay. Like, just to like, we've just been yapping.

Speaking of yapping. Have we started yet? Yeah. I don't know. The three cameras guys, I don't know. You tell me. But just to kind of like wrap it, what would you all say is your best piece of advice for couples? In general, just like sustaining like a healthy relationship, but past that existing on social media as well and like navigating that as a couple.

Because like you all talked about how like it's good that you have like separation now like from your work life. Especially working together too. Like it can get really hairy. So like how do you all keep that balance? What's your best piece of advice? I mean, I feel like for the work and relationship balance for us, like, we really capitalize on focusing on our own personal strengths because I think we also too like mesh well together because a lot of like his techie strengths and I've got like more like

artistic creative strengths and so we don't have like we do have obviously some overlap but like we I think lean in the direction of just naturally being better at different things. Yeah. Like complimenting each other. Yeah. Complementing each other. So like I really let him I let him take the reins on like all the tech stuff and you know that side of things.

And I think that's worked. I think also setting boundaries. Totally. We've always also been like if like our relationship comes first no matter what. And if that means that we're sacrificing a fucking ad breed, like who is a shit? That's not, that's not the priority by any means in terms of like putting our relationship first. Totally. Like we sat down before we started the show and like I created the priority stack.

And I wrote down like what are the three things that we care about in the order we care about them? Yeah. We both agreed at any point in time, any of the things that are below number one get, in the way that's the last episode I don't care if we have I don't care if there's a contract I think that I don't care if there's money on the table over there we'll call the sponsors yeah we're not doing it I'm sorry yeah I'm sorry it won't happen yeah and so I'll we can work with you but like yeah it's done yeah I'm not gonna apologize for that I do apologize for inconvenience it's causing you

but like we can't move forward on this yeah and I just don't think that there's that many problems that would be as big as they've become for people if they just talked about it earlier yeah that's the other thing I feel like we talk about resentment a lot on our podcast about how it's like the moment that you start feeling any kind of resentment I feel like you have to nip in the butt and communicate about it whatever like even even acknowledging that like okay this might be really stupid and feel really dumb and like not you know of value to you but like to me this is really important yeah and I want you to know how I'm feeling and I'm starting to feel this way and so before it becomes like a bigger issue I feel like resentment is just like the most like the strongest

poison to poison the well and it can just make things go so south so fast but it's too stupid Because the person who's feeling it often doesn't want to admit they're feeling it. Totally. I know, I don't. Like, I'm always like, later on, I'm like, let me tell you why I was upset with you, but I shouldn't have been, but I want you to know why I feel, I felt stupid at the time. Yeah. And like, now I realize it, but we haven't talked about it.

Yeah. And you might have even missed it. Yeah. But I want to talk about it anyway, just like, so you're aware. Yeah. And like the many times I feel like I've said that and halfway through the conversation, I realize more about why I'm upset in the first place is like, I don't know. I've had so many.

epiphanies like that where I'm kind of like I just want to tell you what bothered me earlier I'm not upset about it now I just want to tell you so I can get it off my brain and then it can die like we don't need it then it dies versus like then it kind of just fester and fester and I feel like also too as soon as both people in the couple are aware of something that's happened before it like sets you up for success in the future if you encounter a similar issue again also you have to respect your partner totally and like if you don't respect your partner I don't know how much communication is gonna help like if you that's true

really don't think that like they're if you fucking hate your boyfriend you should or your girlfriend you should leave i haven't that you can't even hate somebody but if you respected them you can get to a better place that's true that's true yeah that's true yeah guys just don't respect their partner yeah absolutely and like i'm like oh you you legitimately at a certain point you're like oh yeah but they're just not capable of earning your respect yeah there's like no basic human respect what are you going to talk about yeah like there's there's no foundation to build anything You think you're on this pedestal and you think she's on this one. So why are you even doing this?

Yeah, it's like communication's built on trust. And if you don't trust that your partner is capable and sentient enough to understand and like offer them respect, you can't communicate problems to them. Like you won't. But I think that's wonderful that y'all were like, we come first. So like any problems pass that like I don't give a fuck about this enough to like lose you over it. I think that's wonderful. Oh my God.

The check is never going to be big enough that it's worth it to like lose your whole relationship. over. Absolutely. I'd love to see a brand to try. Let me know. That maybe wants to like try and stir something up. I am open to reviewing offers. Well,

thank you so much for coming on the pod. I adore both of you. Thanks for each other's token straight. Token straight. Look at us. I love that for us. Where can everybody find you? Wherever Lauren is.

Literally, Jeremy's got his, you know, bi-annual Instagram post. We're Wild Till 9 on podcasts everywhere you get your podcast. And I'm Lord DIY across all socials. period. Very exciting. And our dogs. Oh, yes. Oh, they have to share an account though. Do you have an Instagram account for your dogs? No, not yet. Oh, man. Not as of right now. Yeah. Honestly, Moose's got some, like, sizable brand deals. I'm like, oh, so you did better than me this month? Sle. Girl, I'm trying to get on that shit. I could have made as much as Mooster when I first

moved to L.A. for the first, I don't know, five years. That would have been amazing. My manager's like, so I guess I'm wrapping a jog. But he skipped the ramen noodle diet, went straight to filet. I do get, I do get PR for squid and tuna sometimes. I don't know. Squid gets PR. Yeah, squid gets PR. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you just have to unwrap it.

That's true. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he just doesn't give a fuck. Justice for tuna, PR. Yeah, I know. I know, no one sends tuna PR. Hello. Yeah, what the fuck?

Justice for tuna. That's Able list. Anyway, you is. Squid and tuna Instagram coming soon. Yeah. Thank you all so much for joining us on this episode of the comment section. Thank you to my amazing guest, Lauren and Jeremy. Make sure y'all go follow them on everything.

Go listen to their awesome podcast. I was on there. too and that may be coming out or maybe it's already out depending on when this today today look at that i don't even know when you all are going to see this but i was on their podcast so make sure you all go listen to it they're wonderful and amazing and thank you all so much for joining us don't forget new episodes of the comments section drop every wednesday you can stream the audio on all streaming platforms or you can watch the video exclusively and for free on spotify thank you so much to lauren and jeremy thank you so much for watching and i'll see you next week bye