The Creep Off - Episode 117: Serious Calls Only!

Episode Date: June 13, 2022

In this lighthearted edition of the Creep Off Karl and Vinnie dabble in substitute teaching. Karl debuts a brand-new SJ deep fake video: In the scum parade we get down to the bottom of what's really wrong with the media...they are lazy. Support the show, find us on patreon and get cool exclusive merchTo learn more about the creeps in this weeks Scum Parade here are some helpful links Owner of Master Lim’s Taekwondo arrested on sex abuse charges | WHEC.comChild care worker arrested for making porn with children he was supposed to be looking after | Daily Mail Online30 dead dogs, cats found in home of South Carolina animal rescue CEO (nypost.com)NYC teen charged with murdering newborn son, police say (nypost.com)-

I think we should really start the show, Carl. Yeah, I think we should start the show, buddy. No one is delivering more for union members than Governor Kathy Hokel. Cut that pot out. Hey, everyone, Tucker Dixon here. It's time for me to butcher this recap. Carl brought in an award-winning creep. Award-winningly boring. Nailed it.

All they did was track some chip down and rape and murder her. I guess that's a pretty good creep there, Carl. Vini, on the other hand, brought an actual Hall of Famer. She was a feisty redhead who decided that gender equality was not good enough enough Australia, so she decided to become the first woman to be sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole. She also proved that women can do it too. And by it, I mean rape and murder men. As for my creepiest butcher, well, that would have to be Tom Myers.

Anyways, that's all I got for this week. Tucker, out. Attention parents, what you're about to see is not suitable for kids. Shoot, it's not even suitable for some grown-ups. You might want to walk away now if you ain't into these type of things. I'm going to give the people what they want, sensation, horror, shock. I'm going to deliver the goods because I'm alive, and I'm not backing down. It was a trip of a lifetime. Disgusting, vomit-inducing thing.

Ola Creepos, welcome to another edition of your favorite true crime podcast, the show about creeps, by creeps. For you, our little creeps at home, it's a great episode today. It's number 117, and we are going to be talking about the category that you picked, substitute teachers. A lot of creeps substituting these. days. Carl, you notice that? I was absolutely shocked by the repeat offenses and how people were able to masturbate in front of classes multiple times. Yeah, I'll just go to a different school district that if you don't have me doing this here. That's fine. You don't even understand people.

Like this one guy in the same district, like I think 32 days between incidents. Yeah. You don't have to hire this guy. It's amazing. I don't know. There was a guy who was, he was pulling an opi. He was filming some kid taking a shit in the stall. Did you see that guy? Yep. And what's great is that he went running away because the kid caught him. So they just have footage of him who were sprinting away from the school.

They will never get me. There was a little toilet paper on a shoe as he was running down the hallway. Looking great. I liked the one guy. There was a 75-year-old teacher. This guy, he got busted because what he was doing was, masturbating in the hallway of the school. Is that frowned upon?

Yes, it is. Especially when you lay down in front of the lockers, like you're at your house. Jacking it, jacking it, jacking it, jacking it, spike in it, spike in it. You got to get comfortable, Vinny. You're going to do walk around and jerk it? By the way, I'm your host. My name is Vinny Paul. You know, this is Carl Hamburger.

Hey, what's happening, Vinny? We got to talk about last week before we talk about this week. Are you sure you want to do that? No, I'm not happy with what's going on with the voting from last week. Well, I will remind everybody that we are tied three to three. Yes. First person to five wins. Loser has to spin the wheel of consequences.

And currently this week, I just. 80% going to Vinnie Paulino with Kathy Knights. Hall of Fame are in a lot of people's opinions. Yeah. I'm very happy with that. And that was a lot of research on that one. Yeah. You brought it, buddy.

I wasn't surprised that you won last week's contest. But today it's going to be different. Today, I brought it. Hey, Carl, before we move on. Because I need to rebound, I got to get this score to 4-4 so we can have our rubber match. Go ahead. Before we move on, I just want to remind you, that was another. Vinhousing for the win-housing.

Thank you for reminding me that, sir. That's the third middle figure you've given me since I got here. I only've been here for like 10 minutes. Yeah, you just really enjoyed your cackle when you heard your Kathy Hockel video played back to you. Yeah, that was great. That was funny. Oh, my God. You are becoming one of the most hated.

in the world for this. A little switch you did. What did I do? You added ads. Put a couple advertisements on a podcast or two. Yeah, what a... Well, you never heard of the ad on a podcast before. Welcome to Carl's ad-free show, the creep off.

Oh, no, we'll get over on the other platform, but I won. Won't. We'll get out there eventually. Just support us on Patreon. That's all you need to do. All right, Carl. Let's, I guess, start the contest I won, so I'll go first. All right.

Let's see what you got, buddy. Well, substitute teachers might creep today. Ooh, it's a lady. Her name is Heather Carpenter. Now, folks, here's the thing. We just talked about the myriad of sex offenders. There's a million drug addicts, all sorts of perverts, just running around the schools. We all know this.

A lot of pedophiles are attracted to schools. Huh. I don't know. Go figure. It seems logical, but I don't think I've heard anything about this. Did you hear what Dick Masterson's idea? for solving gun violence in schools is. Arm the pedophiles.

They have the most to lose. They'll protect the kids. You know they're there anyway. Give them guns. I'm like, that's pretty brilliant. Arm the pedophiles. They're mine. Yeah.

They just have like a bazooka. They pull out of a locker. This is mine. If you shoot any of the cute ones, so help me God. Protect the kindergarten. Holy shit. shit dick you're hysterical all right um my creep she's a lady and one of the things that really drew me to her was the fact that you're not going to find anybody else who did what she did

okay this is a one and a million kind of broad here cool she's a what she's a what she teach calculus to inner city youths yeah because that would be impressive she flips a chair up backwards it starts reading mathematic equations to them they figured out integrals in eighth grade would be impressive. No, she's, what she did is impressive. She's a 42-year-old Ohio-born soccer mom who relocated to Sarasota, Florida. She worked at the Philippi Shores Elementary School beginning in October of 2019 as a substitute. Okay. October 17th, to be exact. Okay. Okay. Yep. Sometime in November 2019, Heather puts in a professional complaint to the principal of a school, a woman named Allison Foster. Now,

A lot of the records of what happened here are sealed. But it was a professional complaint about something that was going on. And Heather Carpenter. Were they like kissed by a rose or something? Behind the bleaches. So this woman, Alison Foster, apparently did not handle the situation to Heather Carpenter's liking. Okay. Okay.

And apparently Heather was being very vocal about it and acting disgruntled at her job. You have to stick up for yourself. No one's going to do it for you. This woman is the principal. You are a substitute teacher. Yeah, but these principles, sometimes, you know, they get this power trip going. They think that, oh, you know everything. Listen, man.

I'm about fighting the power. Yeah, me too. I'm about it. Down with the principal. Down with teachers, no more books. Down with homework. Yeah. What?

Dude, that podcast about this show has got to be silly. That show is so stupid. down with home work having a hard time recovering from it i'm sorry well listen we're totally about to go down the uh podcast about list trail in a second here okay here's what complicates the situation Heather carpenter and alison foster both have seven-year-old daughters who are very good friends oh great and they're both in the same grade oh so they their acquaintances already then they're yeah so now there's like this animosity thing going on which is never good right sure So the principal's daughter had a birthday party scheduled for December 1st at a local park.

Now, in spite of this feud, Heather Carpenter's daughter was invited to this celebration. Right. Be adults. Let's be adults about it. Right. Yep. No. No. Let's fast forward to 6 a.m. the day of the day of the party. A man's hanging out in the park by the pavilions that the principal had rented for the day. I'm going to let him describe to you what he saw because he really explained. this well. Mike Hutchinson was at the park before the sun came up December 1st and says he saw the

foul crime being committed. It looked like she was wiping down the tables, who she was, but it looked like I don't know if she was staining the tables or putting some protectant down. He says the woman was wearing a surgical mask and blue rubber gloves and took off as soon as she realized she was caught. When I walked back over here to see what was going on, the smell hit me. Carl. Yeah, I'll let him continue to explain what was going on here. Okay. I noticed that she did it to every table, wiped it on every table. It was on the ground. It was a mixture of

urine and feces. And she had her in a big cup and just just pointed out and wiping it in. She poured poop-y-pee? Carl. She's poured poop-pee all over? Carl. Every part of it has a pooper. That's if he invited you. Party pooper.

A whole potty pooper. Everybody has a booper. That's what you. Party pooper, baby. That's what you are. She took a slurry of her own piss and shit Yeah To the park And rubbed it down on all of the wood tables Just rubbed it everywhere

And not only that She rubbed it on all of the grills On all the grids of all the girls Isn't her daughter going to this party later? Yeah Okay What in the ever loving fuck was going through this woman's mind Well also I have to say 6 a.m. is a hell of

time to be committing crimes right fucking teachers man yeah wow that's impressive the investigating deputy learned that the principal was the birthday party organizer found out she invited all the children in her daughter's class which included the child of carpenter a teacher she was having the dispute with deputy to say carpenter and her van matched the description from the suspect of the witness because when she ran away she jumped into her mom minivan and fucking peeled out fucking idiot and uh you thinks she should have run in the car for this video. Is that what you're saying? I think she should have parked a couple blocks away and walked. Or done this while it was still dark out, you know, maybe 5 a.m.

wouldn't have been a better time than 6 a. I mean, this is just a very psychotic thing to do. I mean, it's hilarious. You're calling her a creep. I'm calling her the world's greatest prankster. Yeah, you may say that. Impranical Jokers has nothing on this woman. They should really sign her.

She has better ideas than those guys do. So the dudes in the wall who's pretending to be like working at the food court. All right, now smear the poop and pee all over his burger. Instead of oil in the friulator, we've put poop and pee. And we'll be making these red tides. Everything is just poop and pee. Today, Heather is going to work as a janitor where she's going to use a mop bucket full of poop and pee between the folio. And see if anyone notices.

These are good ideas. These are all good ideas. Oh, one trick, Heather. so the cops go to her what do you think she says uh wasn't me no no she goes uh so listen i am in a professional dispute with this woman uh there is a plot something professional about rubbing your shit all over things carl this woman is crazy she is so creepy and weird she goes there is um a professional dispute happening between us yeah and um i did go to the park and yes i did wipe down the tables with human feces but there is a professional complaint that's being handled

through other channels right now so we're going to need to wait for that to figure out like well ma'am you're under arrest for vandalism yeah and uh you're you're under arrest so they arrest her also I have audio from the guy who watched this happen that witness yeah it stinks apparently didn't smell very good it did not so do me a favor carl yeah don't interrupt me kind of Okay, good point You're being giggle pusses Okay, go ahead Carpenter applied

Bullshit My hands are off the board Let's go ahead Carpenter added Applied for an appointment for a public defender And watch your hands I'm watching you For a public defender She claims she was indigent

whatever the fuck it is she had no money she indicated she had two dependents a take home pay of nothing because she can't work right now because she's suspended from her job because of all of this i would think fired would probably be the right word right no at this point she's always suspended permanently suspended i believe she lists no assets a debt tolling 250 000 wow another woman who can't handle finances get out yeah she lost her shit literally one of the chances however the address given to her in court her records show that The home that she owns is worth $345,000. Descernaring John know about this?

I have been defamed. I am the one who rubs shit on everything. Somehow, the records in this case were sealed. I know that the principal filed another complaint about harassment from this woman. Yeah. But everything got sealed. And I think it's because she ended up pleading guilty and she had no prior record. But I do know this, Carl

Did you take a plea deal? I will tell you this, sir. Yeah. In total, with labor and refunds to the foster family for the rental, new tables, new grills, the damage costs Sarasota County, Florida, $2,310. And that's some real creepy behavior, Carl. Okay.

That's my creep this week. Very good, sir. The potty poop. Very good. So when I think of. substitute teachers. I think of creeps who are substitute teachers. Of course, I think about our friend Stuttering John. And I wanted to bring him as an honorable mention for this. I didn't want to just ignore the fact that he's really the reason why this is the category this week. And so I

brought an exclusive Stuttering John video that you have not seen anywhere else that I want to premiere with you right now, Vinnie. You mean you're actually giving content to this show? That's correct, my friend. Content that you could have put on WATP, but you decided to bring here. Let's check it out. You know, this troll, purple, recorded my stand-up set in Florida and gave it to some loser, so now I have to write some news jokes.

Here they are. I was in an Uber the other day, and the credit card they had on file was declined. I used to do. To be on the Howard Stern Show, where I would ask stupid questions, like, one time, I asked Tom Chiasano if I could have a raise. Oh, excuse me. I'm getting a fine here. You know, my dad was so cheap.

He was so cheap that he bought the world's smallest the source. Not only was it terrible, it was also, you know, terrible. oh no that's right there's an exclusive from our favorite substitute teacher sederary john whatever it happened to that little weirdo with potato guy um i don't know i heard he did a podcast without frankin i get it he does look like pat aswells that's good Yeah, no, I haven't checked it on my mom swipes left friends in a long time. Oh, man, I bet you they close that ship up. All right.

So actually, the creep that I brought this week is very serious. As you'll hear from the first video I have here, Alan won, and you'll find out what this person did. Now to Scott County, where a former middle school substitute teacher has been arrested, charged with three counts of third degree rape. Oh, God. Okay. three counts third degree rape Vinnie this is a substitute teacher someone that a mad question

someone that we trust three cubed to be around children and we're talking about a 15 year old Vinny play my play my video two all right you're Alexandria Alan what here's the former Royal Spring middle school substitute teacher at her

arraignment she's charged with three counts of third degree rape According to her arrest warrant, Alan came into contact with one of her students, a 15-year-old boy while she was in a position of authority, a position of public trust. Oh, this is disgusting. This is awful. I get, you know, usually I can handle these things. Today, Vinny, I am not feeling it, buddy. Did she smear shit on anyone at any point in this?

Could you imagine? Or did she just, like, fulfill people's wet dreams here? This 25-year-old woman who's in very good shape takes care of herself. She's a good-looking boy. Raping a 15-year-old boy, just an innocent boy who's just trying to get an education. This is what the problem. I mean, let's just keep her these run. I mean, this is so disgusting.

In the warrant, police say during a forensic interview, the 15-year-old told them he had sex with the 25-year-old teacher. I just want her in jail. We talked to his mother last October after she reported to police that she found nude photos and videos of Alan and her son on his cell phone. She said Alan tutored him because he had developmental delays. Oh, so you got this. Oh, no. Poor kid who's got mental issues, can't learn real well. She's filling up his phone with all of these awful pictures.

She should tip this girl. Nudes. Oh, my gosh. Now she doesn't have to have a talk with a slow kid. This poor kid. He's getting an education. Could you imagine, Vinny? She's going above and beyond.

You just want to go on Snapchat. See what your friends are up to and there it is. Nudes. of your teacher in there, and you're like, oh, my gosh, this is unbelievable. And the mother, of course, is not happy with this at all. I was disgusted because you're supposed to be helping him. And she wasn't helping him at all. The warrant states the alleged crimes took place over eight months from March to October of last

year at three different locations, including a Hilton Inn hotel in Georgetown. So this kid was getting... My mouth, my pussy, and my butt. I don't think this is a laughing matter, Vinny. This 15-year-old boy was getting raped for eight months. Just getting raped all over town for eight months, Minnie. This is all brought John. I'm going to beat you with the dumbest creep I've ever brought into the show.

It's so awful. This is so off. Fifteen-year-old boy was raped for eight months straight. And Vinny, if you think that's not bad, my last clip on here, They're not done investigating this person. Well, that's good. Meanwhile, Georgetown police say their investigation is not over. We are waiting on some more.

Search wants to come back for social media accounts. And it's possibility more charges may come with what we find. So these police officers, I do not envy them. They have to go through more of her Snapchats and find out if there's more nudes in there and videos and sex acts. Oh, God. Can you imagine? Who would sign up for a job like that? So we'll find out, you know, maybe she was raping other kids, too,

and they just haven't spoken up yet. I don't know. But what a creep. Alexandria Allen. Prince Gratz in the YouTube chat says, is the mom the creep? Or who's the creep here? This woman raped a 15-year-old boy for eight months in hotel and shitty hotel rooms all over town.

Are you guys, is no one following this story? am I not explaining this correctly? This poor fifth-year-old boy was raped by his substitute teacher who was supposed to be tutoring him. This is awful, guys. This is awful. Is that your case? That's my case. That's my creep. Has she been convicted? Vote for Carl.

Has she been convicted? I don't know. I'll do a follow-up when I win. How did they catch it? Just because the mom found the pictures? Because the mom found the nude photos on this kid's phone. He's probably tried to delete them. He's like, ah, get this up my phone. Mom! How do I get these photos up my phone it's her fucking snatch close up should have picked the mom this video video of my teacher rubbing her snatch it's it's really close up too you can see everything she just got a wax

i wanted to do like a drum saw right now i'm hot for teacher oh it didn't look like you were doing a drum soul looks like you were doing something very different than that i was trying to hit the table yeah okay well that's what i call my dick oh oh all right to go to the creepy Pop.com, vote for Carl. Oh, good, Vinnie. Thank you. Vote for Carl and Alexandra Allen. I think you should be voting for Vinny and Heather Carpenter.

The rapist, Alexandria, Allen. The party pooper, ladies and gentlemen. Normally, I don't argue with you at this point in the show, but your creep is hilarious. Your creep is fun and funny, and I enjoy your creep, and I would invite her to other people's parties. Yeah, but other people's. She's definitely creepier. Yours is sexier. Oh, right.

Wow, Vinnie defending a rapist. You heard it here first. You heard it here first. Don't put things like that on me. All right. Let's do some voicemails. This is brought to you by the city of Syracuse. The creep-off voicemail segment is brought to by the city of Syracuse.

The only place you get to see Vinnie Paulino and Jim Florentine together live, June 23rd. Apart from all, when you, June 22nd. See you in Syracuse. I'll be dodging gunfire through the. the ball all the way to the funny bone yeah that mall's scary i wouldn't go there i'm really like i don't know you'd be lucky to just get hecklers at that place right it's gonna be like the blues brothers yeah right uh either way it's like a dave chapelle shell watch out all right this is a gentleman who was none too pleased with uh our comments on poodles during last week's scum

parade yeah fuck you guys had a proud pool owner it is the most loving dog that I've ever owned and plus it gets the peanut butter off my balls better than any golden receiver or Labrador I've ever had so fuck you guys

wow I would think that a poodle might bite I'd be nervous about that so we're really doing licking peanut butter off balls jokes on the show now Vinnie is that what this is turned into um it's digressing even more Carl I hope WATP doesn't get his hands on this episode.

I hear that guy, Kevin's a real asshole. This one is from our good friend that we had dinner with in Nashville. Carl, listen to WATP and heard you wanted to do, you wanted to add a consequence to the wheel. This is the Calvertor, by the way. Hey, buddy. You wanted to put on the cow bikini as a consequence and do a photo shoot. Oh, Carl.

Lucky you. I'm happy to oblige that Consequence Thote on the wheel You or Vinny Penny would be gross and funny And we'll work out a way To meet up and conduct

We'll reenact the whole shoot Maybe we'll even do it in Kansas where the original shoot was in the same hotel room Oh my God Carl Oh put it on the wheel Put it on the wheel five times You'll fuck yourself

This guy knows gross This guy would know That's right, Carl I'm suggesting creep off live show In the city in Kansas I don't want to docks where Vicks lives But city in Kansas Fonanos and that cows

What can be better, Carl? He really wants to get you in that bikini All right Wadley finds out you purposefully left it in Nashville I did not purposely leave it in Nashville Yeah, he didn't Somebody else did Because I flew to Florida from Nashville

and I had other people who were supposed to bring all of our stuff back, and that didn't happen, apparently. And, yeah, people have some explaining to do. Here's a suggestion from our pal, Crunk Daddy 68. What up, Vinnie? What up, Carl? Hey, Crunk Daddy 68 speaking. I just got a suggestion for a topic.

You should do creepiest person with dwarfism, and the special guest tries to be Hornswoggle or Peter Dinklish. All right, come to do you. You think we could get Hornswoggle? Yeah. I think so. Probably, you're right. Sure.

Who about Webster? Is he still alive? I got a big announcement about the creep-off roast happening September 17th here at Comedy of Carlson and Rochester, New York. Someone is announcing that they're going to be here. Oh. Me, Brackerel! I purchased my ticket to the horse of September, and I don't see you all there. I'm following you fuckers around like the bandfish.

To water. Fuck you love you, bye. That's good. I like that. Bad practice guys covered. Nice. That's exciting. I always like hanging out with Bambride this guy.

Yeah. Do you got any voicemails, Carl? I don't. No voicemails this week. But yeah, but we should remind people, creepoffroast.com. You should remind your fucking self. Creepoffroast.com. Trying to make up for it, Vinny.

Try to do better. All right. Will that do it? Go ahead. Finish the plot. Creepoffroast.com is where you can get your tickets to come see the roast of Carlin Vinny in beautiful. Rochester, New York. September 17th is the date.

There were some tweets. last night that somebody sent at us that said that we were sold out of the VIP combos. That is not accurate. There are some left. Oh, great. Okay. There are definitely some left, but they are limited. So grab those if you're going to grab them.

Now would be the time. I'm shocked at how quick the tickets moved for this. Yeah, we have a VIP meet and greet that's happening, what, before the roast. Yeah. There's going to be some hors d'oeuvres. It's going to be a lot of fun. Can people check out our studio here? Can we do a little tour of the studio?

No. Why not? Because I don't want people in here. You have to clean up a little bit? Yeah. If I was trying to clean up, you wouldn't be allowed in here. I see what you did here. No, but I think maybe we might be able to work that out.

Okay. We sold out of all of our front row tables. Maybe if you were one of the front row table purchasers, you might be able to get a. Well, that's not a good promotion, dummy. They've already bought those. They're like, okay, we'll just give the purchase to those people. No, no, no, no. I'm trying to help us sell tickets here.

But he's going, yeah, no, no, no. We won't even talk to that. And I'm planning I'm putting out a bad show Like no, no, no, that's not you talking about I'd work my ass off on the show And not only that, can I, can I say this, Carl? Please. You get a poster, too.

You get a cool creep-off roast poster. Sweet. With your combo. So, can I get one? Absolutely. Nice. Our friend It's a mince salad is doing them for us. Yay!

I love men's work. Yeah, she's great. So keep in mind, creepoff, Rose. I go. Last time we're talking about, are you ready for a scum parade, Carl? I am. Do you have our sounder? No, you do.

All right. My board's fucked. Can you hit your sounder? I could, but it's funny or just to call you out? My board just died on me, and I went to hit. Shut up. Driving, chid and dread. Up and pitil-in.

Two-bagged murderers. Rake to do a rinkily-ray. So you see your path. Abusive asshats. Yeah, the scum parade. Scum parade. on the creeps Have some parade

Oh, it's on parade Carla and Vinny are back Oh Hey Carl Guess where we're starting off today, buddy Let me guess Brockport, New York Ah, that is correct

A little place where yours truly went to college Yeah That's where I got my marketing degree What an endorsement I wouldn't recommend anyone to go there. You should be flocking to Brockport. Yeah, I wouldn't recommend it. I hope Brockport sponsors on the Brockport University, the proud sponsor of the creepoff.

The owner-operator of Master Lins. Now you want advertising. Okay. All right. I see what's going on here. We do funny, silly commercials, and it'd be fun to make fun of the college that gave you a degree. I earned a degree. Earned it.

Paid for and earned are two different things. Yeah, I know. The owner-operator of Master Lims, Taekwondo, and Brockport. is facing charges of first-degree sex abuse and endangering the welfare of a child. The Monroe County Sheriff's Office says that J. Lim 50 of Sweden, New York, touched a 12-year-old child in a sexual manner on more than one occasion over the course of a month. I heard touching under the clothes and trying to open-mouth kiss her. An investigators believe is an isolated incident.

Did you see that? Yes. So here we have a 50-year-old guy. He was around children all the time. He's finger-fucking a 12-year-old. And investigators are like, I think this is probably the first time he's done that. Why? What is she, like, super hot or something?

No, Taekwondo. They're all about discipline. Why would they think that this is the first time this has happened? This guy went to this profession for a reason. He could be like, I was trying to do a demonstration. Yeah, maybe two finger poke. Yeah, I was thinking maybe they were trying to act out a self-defense scenario. I was like, okay, let's preface the move when the attacker drops two digits on you.

And let's figure out of that one. Try to get out of this move. I call it the French tickler. Yeah. So this guy... What if I got my tug wedged up your asshole? What would be your self-defense move for that? Let's try it.

They sent him to the Monroe County Jail and they issued an order of protection for the victim. But here is the fun part. Oh, okay. I don't know who the bigger creep is here. Not the person I'm going to mention next. Markipolito is a two-time New York State Taekwondo champion. I had no idea. Yeah.

That's really true? 100% true. So he could kick my ass. Market Bolito could kick your head right off of your fucking shoulders. So I shouldn't be so wise. I shouldn't crack wise around him as much as I do as what you're talking about. I might recommend you start booking an isotope's Christmas show now. Yeah, okay.

Whatever he wants. Dude, I'm not kidding you. Markipolito. I believe you. One time, I watched the dude. It was at the old club at Webster. A guy did something and he grabbed his arm and like leaped over the bar in one motion. It just walked him out.

Just like, you're out of here. The guy's like, all right. He's just like, he's the drunk whisper. but he is a badass dude. How is it that the bouncer is allowed to run the comedy club here in Rochester? Who gave the bouncer the keys of the front doors? And all right, you booked the talent. Try fucking heckle it at the roast.

Yeah, right. So J. Lim, this guy, Mark used to spar with this guy. And he's a Korean tiger, which is like a big deal. He said this guy is an absolutely amazing athlete. But here's the thing. Was Mark able to finish with him, or how does that work? Before this guy had this dojo. He was at a place called Master Kim's Taekwondo.

And he moved out to Brockport and opened up Master Lim's Taekwondo with like the same logo. Yeah, not confusing. The same everything. And it was like everything cost a dollar to last. It was like one of those situations. I'm going to start a comedy club called Comedy at Carls and see how that goes. I'm sure no, no, care. Everything's spelled with Kay is in case you're wondering.

It's because this place called Comedy at the Carlson. So, why that's, I said that. The guy who trained Mark's son now runs Kim's taekwondo. And that's the guy who doesn't fuck 12 year olds? That is the one who does not try to open mouth kiss children. Okay, good. His name is Sung C. Kim, okay? Should we get Mark's son in here and ask him if anything's happened or?

Mark's daughter, no. Daughter? Because his kid would go to Kim's, not to fucking limbs. Don't go to Limbs, go to Kim's. Okay. So yesterday, June 8th, this is an article. This is actually a Facebook post from Sung C. Kim. You were going to laugh your ass off with this.

At about 2.30 p.m., News 8, Rochester ran a story out of local Taekwondo instructor arrested in charge of two counts of first-degree sex abuse. The story was disappointing enough as it places a black eye within our martial arts community. To my shock, my picture and Master Kim's Taekwondo Institute's business logo appeared in all of the stories. No! Oh! That's the ultimate revenge right there. that guy was playing the long game he's going not only am I going to rip you off it's going to be confusing then I'm going to fuck a 12 year old

and people are going to post your logo on all the news stories I might go to prison for 20 years but people are going to think you're the one fucking children so when channel 8 got crazy that's insane can you imagine like you're at Hollywood like I did what so the people the digital editor for WROC channel A contacted.

Could you imagine like Todd Gerson like fuck to 12 year old or something? People are like, Rochester podcaster fucks 12 year old. I wait, what? No, no. Everyone would automatically assume it was you. Or you. No, nobody wants to fuck me. That's true.

The digital editor reached out to them and said that it was about a mistake. And I asked him how this could happen. He said, quote, our staff Googled master entire. Taekwondo and your picture popped up. Wow. That's what the news media is, people, in case you're wondering. The news media is reading tweets and Googling things and picking the first results. Wow.

Just thought you'd like to know everybody. Yeah. So I feel bad for Sung-Cim. If you're in Rochester for the roast, go take a Taekwondo class over there or something, help the guy out. He won't dittle you or nothing. Well, unless you're really hot. Master Kim's Taekwondo. I believe it is.

So that's a fun story. That is a fun story. Wow. Yeah. I kind of kept that a secret from you. I like it. I wanted your surprise. I like it.

Let's move over to the Bronx, shall we, a daycare worker has been arrested on child pornography charges after he was allegedly found with images of a child he was supposed to be looking after. Police said Silfredo Castillo Martinez

worked at Lena's Garden Daycare for more than a decade and was arrested for possessing multiple images depicting child pornography. Computer crime investigators said Martinez had been dealing in child porn since July of 2011 when he first began working at the center. He lives in the same building as the center.

Convenient. It's good. It's not every day you could have a pleasure palace and get a paycheck. Right. The children come to you. You don't go to them. The state records show the place had 12 children between the ages to six weeks and 12 years old, as well as four additional school-age children.

One of the alleged victims which appeared in the footage of the phone was a 12-year-old who attended the daycare center. A handwritten note now hangs down the door declaring that it is temporarily closed. But apparently, there was a room in the back where the older kids were and he was in charge of that room. And he was like producing pornography.

Vinnie, I think being a porn director would be a hard job, but imagine trying to be a porn director with 12-year-olds and get the money shot, correct? And like little stupid kids come modging in trying to get a toy they left in there. Yeah, and these kids are taking me shots.

These kids aren't taking direction well. Yeah, I imagine this would be a very grueling job this guy had. We got time for one more take before your parents get here. Also, what about the parents whose kids weren't cast in the film? They got to be pissed. Like, oh, what? Billy's dick isn't big enough for your movie? What do you think they're upset?

The kids aren't going to get a fucking sag card? Shut up, Carl. So, listen, ladies and gentlemen, I learned something today that I do not like. There is a website called Winnie, which is a daycare finding site. I do not like that. Winnie? Yeah, W-I-N-N-I-E. Winnie, Winnie, Winnie, Winnie, Find the daycare.

Winnie, Winnie, Winnie. I don't like it. Winnie, Winnie, Winnie, Winnie, Winnie. So the NYPD have urged members of the public with more information on Castillo-Martinez. So, ladies and gentlemen, if you're listening to this, and you are a student at this daycare and you were dittled by this man, please call 1-800-5-7-7-6. seven tips why do you always read those serious calls only

do you really think the people listening to the show no it's just funny have any connection to these things I just like to say serious calls only people yeah guys this is no laughing matter this next story really made me a little sick Carl this one is a doozy

this really is just to show you the world is filled with completely disgusted hypocrites. I have a theory on this one, but you read the story first. The CEO of a South Carolina animal rescue nonprofit was arrested when police found dozens of dead animals inside her home while investigating a complaint about the quote, the smell of death. Caroline Don Pennington, the 47-year-old CEO and director of growl, was arrested Friday in charge with 30 counts of ill-treating of animals after officers discovered the bodies of 28 dogs and two cats decomposing in cages inside of her shithole.

Richmond County investigators uncovering the revolted seed while performing a wellness check at her house on May 22nd after a neighbor reported a quote smell of death wafting from the Columbia residents. Richland County Sheriff Leon Lott said the discovery was one of the worst cases of animal cruelty he's ever seen. This is someone who is entrusted by the community to care for these animals and find them homes. She betrayed that trust and she betrayed the trust of these innocent animals who relied on her, they said. the animals were in there for up to like nine months they figured out they died inside of cages they were found laying in their own waste police said Pennington is a well-known figure in the animal rescue community

in addition to being the director of the animal rescue grouchy's also employed by the Kirschok County Humane Society no shit so this is what I think Benny because this is an unbelievable thing like why would somebody have all of these animals decomposing in their house. Well, you could just take them to the Humane Society. Just fucking going to clean it up for you. I have a theory.

I think we need to look at whoever's up for CEO. Like, who's next in line? Who's the C-O-O? Who's the VP? Who's next in line? I think that they planted this shit. I think they let these animals decompose and broke into the house, planning them all there, got the neighbors to call the cops.

Because honestly, otherwise this makes no sense whatsoever. You ever see that Danny McBride show? vice principals on HBO. I'm picturing like that type of scenario where these two guys get together like, how are you to get this woman fired? Oh, I got an idea. I got an idea. I got like 30 dogs that we could just let starve to death

and cages. Well, hear me out, hear me out. Then we'll wait like nine months make sure they're real stinky. I like the long game. I'm in. Yeah, right? It's got to be it. Otherwise, none of this makes any fucking sense. Well, they're also investigating her for fraud because she was taking money in as a 501

C3. Oh, okay. Which is probably also not a good thing to do. Well, she wasn't taking that money and buying cat food, that's for sure. The Richland County Sheriff's Department is asking anyone who donated to Growl in the last year to contact them. Serious calls only.

That is a brutal story. Holy shit. Yeah, that is not good. Although, I bet that show Animal Herders is pissed. They didn't get in on that. 30! The producer's fired. He's just packed, he's cleaned out his office right now. this uh to this woman i just want her to know you think you could get away with that without

having legal legal ramifications you're out of your fucking mind that's right car words have never been spoken i got good news carl good news and horrifying news okay we have another baby thrower a 17 year old bronx marum has been charged with murdering her newborn son who she threw out a window. I don't think that baby bird was ready to leave the nest yet. You know if the baby returned, she'd be hers forever.

Honestly, how do you know whether or not you gave birth to Superman if you don't chuck him out the window and see if you can fly? I think that that's a pretty solid way to go about that. There's so many superhero movies now. I'm surprised this is happening more often. If you were a child thrown out a window by Carl, Please call the Rochester Police Department. Serious calls only.

The teen tossed her day old child out of her fifth floor apartment window on East 58th, 158th Street. Police were initially called to Lincoln Medical Center around 3 p.m. When the teen told them she had previously given birth inside her apartment. And they go, well, where's the baby? Yeah. She was like, I don't know. How much wind is there today? She just like, it depends.

It depends. It depends. It's just like, put a minute mouth and held it up for the breeze. Yeah. Ah, 30 yards that way. Today's Bronx weather report, 60% chance of raining babies. Hey, everybody. We're out here on East 158 Street.

Oh, God. Holy shit. Authorities searched the area and found the infant unconscious and unresponsive inside a flower bed. It's fucked up. So, cops said he was pronounced dead at the scene by EMS. His death was ruled a homicide, obviously. The young mother whose name was not released. was arrested Thursday in charge with murder

and manslaughter cop said. So. Oh, my board's working again. Sorry. Carl, you are a treasure. I think it's malfunctioning, but there's nothing funny about that story. Yeah, it couldn't be. That story is more like,

ha! Folks, that's the scump parade this week. That is this week's episode of the creep off. Make sure you visit the. Creepoff.com to vote for Vinny because, holy shit, my lady, let's not forget. Every part of there has a booper. That's if he invited you. Pod the booper.

That's right, Carl. All right, so here's what it comes down to. You can vote for a rapist or someone who's a hilarious prankster. And I think this show is called The Creepoff, which means you should be voting for Carl and Alexandria, Alan. Yeah, because Carl is a creep, but this week you should vote for Vinny and Heather Carpenter. We will be back next week with a brand new episode. Also this week, if you are a member of Patreon, you'll be getting a very special from my heart episode,

bonus episode this Friday afternoon. Our pal Kaya is going to be joining us. Can't wait. It is going to be the 15th birthday celebration. Why don't we promote this at the beginning of the show? Why are we talking about it now? Oops. Good idea.

Most people listen to the whole episode. We have good fans. We have good fans. It's true. It's not skip around. And our content is, amazing through and thrill from start to finish. Except for that paw in the middle there where Carl talks.

So creepoff.com. You can also, there's a link there to get your tickets to the roast. And we will be back next week. Until then, remember, it's nice to be important. It's more important to be nice. Gia. You're a party pooper baby. That's what you are.

That ain't funny. It's the cream off. Splat! No one is delivering more for union members than Governor Kathy Hokel. May your enemies be cursed in your podcast adventures.