The Creep Off - Episode 135: Uncle Saul
Episode Date: October 17, 2022This week Karl & Vinnie make their nominations for the creepiest information technology specialist: in this weeks “Who are these Creeps” we pay tribute to the second greatest true cri...me podcaster in the world Nancy Grace: In the Scum Parade we meet a gullible Chinese woman, creepy Uncle Saul and a couple with too much faith in their witch doctor Read the stories here:
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey everyone, welcome to The Creepoff.
This is a competition-based podcast where two men try to find the creepiest person in a given category,
and they bring in evidence in the form of clips that they stole from more successful and better-produced true-crime podcasts.
Then you, the listener, get to head over to the sub-reddit to vote for who brought in the clips that actually played during the live stream.
The winner earns a point, and the first to five points can make the loser spin the dreading of consequences,
which includes funny consequences such as the seven-second porn challenge
or having to reboot your computer three times at a live show in front of Anthony Coomia
the current score is insert score here later
anyways last week was Detroit week
which when you have a city where the least creepy person is literally M&M
you fucked up as a city
anyways that's all I got for this week Tucker out
Light a seat is not suitable for kids.
Shoot, it's not even suitable for some grown-ups.
You might want to walk away now if you ain't into these type of things.
I'm going to give the people what they want.
Sensation. Horror, shock.
I'm going to deliver the goods because I'm alive, and I'm not backing down.
Cuckoo, cuckoo.
What the hell is it supposed to be?
Welcome to
Ola
Creepos, welcome to another edition of your favorite true crime podcast,
the show about creeps by creeps.
For you creeps, I'm your host.
My name is Vini,
and joining me in studio.
is my pal who needs a pick-me-up.
It's Cic-Ca-C-C-Carl, everybody.
What is happening, Vinnie Paulino?
Nice to be back in the studio with you, a functioning studio.
Everything seems to be working.
And I want to be mean to you.
I want to laugh at you.
I want to tell you that the first 45 minutes of your live show in New York
was an out-of-body transcendently amazing experience for me
while letting you just suffer all of the pain that I've suffered
when a live stream here didn't work,
all of the abuse you've taken.
and online from everybody, very similar to abuse that I've had to take in the past.
Way to make it about you. Who are you, Nancy Grace? What's going on right now?
So I was going to say I was just going to be nice to you today, but then you got to be a dick.
So I guess it's a regular show, fuckface. Let's go.
Sounds good. Let's get to do it. I want to know about the voting from last week.
I don't want to talk about it. I want to talk about that. I want to see what's going on.
All right. So last week we did Biggest Creek from Detroit. Yes. And I brought the biggest creep from Detroit.
You brought a person who smashed a kitten with a hammer.
Yeah.
People don't like those types of stories.
They're not entertaining.
You're not supposed to vote for who you like.
You're supposed to vote for who's the biggest creep.
And I brought the biggest creep, apparently, because Mike Scoopin was voted with 80 to 50.
You know.
Cause a roo
And I want to thank
this computer right here
The one that I brought with me to New York
For working for some reason right now
So I could play those sounds
Isn't that fun?
It's the same one that's working
I haven't done anything to it
It's working now
Isn't that fun
You know what folks
This is gonna be just enough for Carl
To not buy another computer
For like another week
Yep just to sabotage me a few more times
Yeah
This is just enough
Like that whole soliloquy he just put out, that's the window.
So I did a quick episode when I got home yesterday afternoon.
I put it out an explanation to why the New York show got messed up the way that it did.
And the Drew and Mike show, I'm waiting in bed this morning, listening to Drew and Mike.
They played the entire episode with putting drops all over it, just goofing on me endlessly.
It was really funny.
Oh, man.
You know, the only good thing about you is that you're a good sport.
It really is the only good thing about you.
Fair enough.
I made it really you are you're a great sport what else could I do right yeah well I'll tell you
what we're going to do we're going to have fun because you did inspire this week's category uh
I believe it was band practice guy leaned over to me in a bar and said hey did you decide on a
category for Monday yet and I said no what do you got and he goes well after this shit I think
you should do creepiest IT tech yes IT professional he also made these awesome pumpkins dude
Banperin. This guy rules. He came and joined us in New York. He's a blast.
The man. He really is great.
Love that guy.
So, yeah, I had some audio technical difficulties when we were doing the live show in New York this past weekend.
But we had a good time, though, right, Benny?
Carl, you are fantastic to work with.
Good.
You do a great job.
Thank you.
The show was hysterical.
It was a funny show. It went over huge.
It was a funny show.
I mean.
No one will ever know it, but it was a funny show.
I really feel like you should have followed my advice that I can.
gave you and not have told anybody that you fucked up and pretended it was performance art.
Oh, can I still do that?
Try it.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That was a, that was a bit I was doing called the silent podcast.
Silent podcast bit everybody.
And seen.
All right.
Yeah.
It's like Anthony, how he always says, these guys like Patrick Michael, Tony Michael, all of these lunatics.
All if they were an actual, just a person playing a character, would be brilliant characters.
Right.
That could have been your attempt.
You know what?
In jazz music, they say if you play the wrong note once, it's wrong.
But if you play the wrong note twice, it's right.
And I think that's what I should have done.
I should have thought like a jazz musician and said, video only podcast, first time in history.
First time ever, a video only podcast.
Skoll.
Skoll.
I invented a new genre that nobody would ever want to watch.
Wow.
It's pretty impressive, I have to say.
It's going on your weekend.
Wikipedia.
Yes.
Adventure of the Video Only podcast.
Which survived for one episode has never been duplicated or tried again.
And you would think if that's what he was going for, he would have made it a little more visually stimulating for everybody.
Yeah, right?
It's a little crude for a video only show.
But you know what, though?
That makes it just the undiscovered country.
You're a pioneer.
You know what I could do?
Oh, this is kind of fun.
In post, what I could do is I could take that video and then transcribe what everyone was saying and put it up like silent movie style.
So, like, you see Anthony going,
ah, ha, ha,
then it just, like, shows the joke that he's told.
And the background music is yakity sacks
to the whole fucking thing.
Yes.
On a loop.
I love it.
I love it.
It'll be eight-hour video,
but it'll be worth it.
And you know what's great about that is if you just plug it into the Instagram
video thing,
it'll generate the captions for you and you'll be all set.
Ooh.
Yeah, man,
you could be extra lazy, Carl.
All right.
Look at me giving you a way out.
I like it.
All right.
Let's do creepiest IT tech because we got a lot to get to today.
We're going to have another edition of who are these creepos.
I'm going to have a skump parade.
But before we get into that, I'm sorry, last thing.
Tomorrow is the last day.
The 18th is the last day.
You could order your creep-off zombie t-shirt.
They're going away, folks.
One time only.
All right.
H-Tb kicks-ass.com.
Tomorrow being what date, Vinny, not everyone watches this line.
October 18th.
October 18th, get on, hide the bodies by them.
Yes.
And if I go to hide the body, what is it, HGB kicks-ass.com?
If I go to H-DB kicks-ass.com, is that the first thing I'm going to see?
Is that sure do you have to scroll through a bunch of other bullshit first?
No, you're going to have to scroll through a bunch of other bullshit first.
Yeah, we should talk about that.
Anyway, are you ready to, are you ready to start the show, buddy?
Ring that bell.
All right, I chose as my creepiest IT professional, a gentleman named William Camargo.
William Camargo and IT professional was one of 79 offenders who were arrested in Operation Safety Net,
a nine-month investigation led by the New Jersey Internet Crimes Against Children.
They caught a lot of people in that.
How long ago was that one?
2017, that's when this happened.
That was a big one.
This was a biggie.
This was a biggie, mostly in New Jersey.
It concluded in November of 2017, the operation also led to the same arrest of a camp counselor
who allegedly had sex with a 14-year-old camper and a youth minister, authorities say, sent lewd photos of himself to a young girl.
Authorities arrested Camargo on September 12th after detectives traced 50 files from a shared folder at an IP address that was traced to him.
A forensic examination of his personal device has revealed
More than 138,000 files of suspected child pornography
138,000 photos and videos
Fucking Dragon's Nest
Dude, I mean, at what point do you have?
I know collectors like to collect, but at what point do you have enough?
You could live the rest of your life
and never see the same naked child twice.
It just seems excessive.
that everyone's kind of goal.
Like, wouldn't it be nice to see a new set of tits every day, just once you never saw
it before?
Oh, I thought you were going the other way with that, not seeing naked children.
Yeah, I'd really prefer not to see the naked children.
I'm just saying, you know.
Well, let's talk about this investigation.
That's kind of some interesting factoid here.
So they unveiled a new tool in the war on internet crime and finding where these suspects
might be hiding electronics storing pictures and videos.
We might have talked about it on The Creep Up before.
This is from Officer Perino.
He says, our new state police canine, who we have aptly named Mega, helps sniff out those devices.
And the two-year-old German Shepherd is the only police dog in the country trained, not just to do that.
It could smell the dirty files.
Yes.
It could sniff out child pornography ones and zeros on hard drives in a home.
I believe that that's not what it does.
And Mega's handler says that it's all a game to him.
Megan loves looking for these hard drives.
Fucking narc dog.
What do you think, what do you think this dog's up to?
Well, I think what the dog smells for is, like, electronic equipment.
Sure.
Can smell the actual hard drives themselves, and especially they go around the house looking for hidden ones.
Minnie, I didn't really think that it could smell child pornography files.
Yes, you did.
You're a liar.
Piece of shit.
I might seem like I don't know anything about computers, but I actually know more than that.
But it's the same thing with, like, the drugs.
Yes.
This guy could throw a thumb drive down to the corner and go, look there.
that's my point
I'm trying to say like you could still
plan evidence with this shit
that's true that's true
the 100
I'm reading now from the
attorney general here
the 138,000 files of child
pornography found on this defendant's computer
represent thousands of children
who were tortured and sexually exploited
to supply the demand for these vile
materials and who are perpetually
revictimized by the offenders who
distribute their images on the internet
we are committed to protecting children
by vigorously investigating and prosecuting these criminals
During the search, Detective sees computer equipment belonging to Camargo, which a preview revealed contained numerous files of child pornography.
Later, forensic examination of Camargo's device revealed more than 130,000 files of suspected child pornography.
Who is the guy who gets this job?
All right, here's the hard driver.
I need you to find out how many files are on child porn.
He's like, I don't like that guy.
It's just like mega.
It's a game to him, too.
Right, exactly.
It's like, fight something you love to do, never work a day in your life.
right so uh what do you do for living tip well i like to search for the hard drives for evidence
this was the only thing that i was happy about in here so the device contained the devices
contain more than 1.3 million additional graphic and video files those files have not yet been
examined so it's not known how many constitute child pornography so there could be over a million
files of child porn i think they got to a part just like all right we got enough here we could
Give up now, right?
That's, that's enough.
It's like the fucking, it's a small, small world right.
He's got to have pictures of every race on there.
He's got to have a picture of every kid on the planet.
He's got more peaks at kids than fucking Santa.
You know what I learned about when I was researching this topic today?
Because there were a few different IT people who have some child porn on the computers.
Oh, man, that was the, they seemed to really, yeah.
That's a thing for them.
They should know how to hide it, too.
So how many are actually getting away with that, be my question.
And see, this was the thing.
When I went to research this too, yeah.
Lots of Pito.
It's like Pito is like number one on the board.
If this was Family Feud, if you're looking for creepy IT guys.
Yeah, agreed.
But what I found out that I was very shocked by, in the state of California,
it does not matter how much child porn you have.
If you have one photo or two million videos, there's no difference for how they're going to prosecute.
That's either really good or really bad.
Is it good or bad?
It's really bad because what they do is they don't really prosecute child pornography.
So if you want to have CP on your machine, move to California, I guess is what I would tell you.
Jesus Christ. It's a little insane.
Will that state fall into the ocean?
When will it?
That's why I'm rooting for global warming.
Like if you told me that they treat like one photo the same as they would treat two million
in the terms of like it is going to be a harsh penalty.
Right.
We would be like, okay.
Great job California.
Agreed.
But now we're just going to go ahead and say go fuck yourself.
Yeah.
It's not good.
Okay.
All right.
So here's the good news.
Camargo was sentenced to five years in prison for distributing child pornography on the internet.
He pleaded guilty June 11th to second degree distribution of child pornography.
Camargo will be required to register as a sex offender under Megan's law and will be subject to parole supervision for life.
In pleading guilty, he admitted that he knowingly distributed files depicting the sexual exploitation and abuse of a child on the internet.
That's my creepiest IT professional govow on.
Our Reddit page.
Okay, well, hold my beer.
My creep today was charged with some very serious crimes in October of 2021.
Okay.
Since the trial has not happened yet, I will be very sure to cite my sources here.
The Salt Lake Tribune, KSLTV, the New York Post, the New York Post, and the court documents themselves.
Here's a little...
That's a lot of research, Vinny.
I don't like where this is going.
Here's a little teaser.
I'm going to go grab once.
You go.
You do your thing.
I'll be back.
promise you i worked very hard to make this as brief as i could i'm just and you're going to actually
be impressed all right i'm listening new tonight a serious security breach at salt lake pd that breach
revealed names and numbers of undercover police officers were being given to criminals to protect them
from busts hmm this gentleman patrick kevin driscoll he was an i t tech for the city of salt lake
Yeah.
It turns out this gentleman had...
Some call it Salt Lake City.
Yeah.
City of Salt Lake.
Well, that's what they call the technical organization that he works for.
City of Salt Lake Incorporated.
Got it.
Okay.
He's been ordered to stand trial on charges of aggravated human trafficking,
which is a first degree felony,
engaging in pattern of unlawful activity,
and three counsel of obstruction of justice,
second degree felonies,
computer crimes,
exploitation of prostitution. Those are third-degree felonies and aiding prostitution, which is
only a class A misdemeanor. So the investigation began in March 2021 when the Utah Attorney
General's office began looking at this guy named Michael Joe Hicks, oh, I'm sorry, Michael Joe Ricks
for allegedly being involved in a prostitution and drug dealing. He was charged earlier
this past year with 15 felonies and misdemeanors, including two counts of aggravated human
trafficking for forced sexual exploitation
and two counts of aggravated exploitation
of prostitution. All right, I don't want to fuck up
your story here, but I think... There's a lot of crimes
happening. Well, I think drugs and
prostitution should be legal, and some places in this
country they are. So, you know, obviously
Utah is a very conservative area
with a lot of very religious
wackadoos. Carl, you know what? I'm going to entertain this because
you make a good point. All right. I think
some drugs should be legal. I think some
probably shouldn't be. Okay. I think
prostitution should be legal. That's
fine with me. But
drugging women and forcing them into
prostitution, I might
have to differ with you
on should that be allowed.
Drugs are bud. Yeah.
Mr. Mackey agrees. So
throughout the course of the investigation,
they found out that they were able to identify
13 individuals believed to be victims
of Ricks and a total of 26
commercial sex workers.
Good, like did they have, excuse me.
Red Bull did it to me, baby.
Commercial sex workers? What are they
just yell out like Coors Light while you're fucking him.
That for the mountains of Bush.
This fuck is brought to you by Amazon Prime.
Don't miss Thursday night football this fall.
He's running.
He's got a stable girl.
He's got some of them that are being drugged and fucking sold out.
And then he also has a drug ring.
So after Ricks was arrested, one of his victims, one of the ones that was being forced to do things,
provided the law enforcement with some very interesting data.
She said that there was a gentleman who was working for the city
that in exchange for sex with hookers
was giving this man the names of undercover police operatives
details on police stings, operations of the police in the city.
Now, Carl, if you were working at the IT place
Yeah.
And you have access to all this information.
Sure.
You could do better than dirty fucking meth head pussy, couldn't you?
Oh, I was actually thinking that this seems like a pretty fair trade.
This guy's got it all figured out because he makes his money already.
And now he wants to get laid and his job's providing both, which is awesome.
You know, now that I think about it, Chad Zumach might want to learn IT because comedy's not working out for it.
But yeah, you get access to a lot of information for people.
Carl, I'm going to tell you something right now.
I just got the insider Chad Zumach story
of the fucking year
And I can I'm not allowed to say it on the air right now
Damn it! I will tell you off air
Oh good, okay
But I'm gonna tease everybody and tell you all
I know something you don't know and it's fucking crazy
Cool, can I say it on the WTP this week?
Nope
That might anyway, but all right, go ahead
That's up to you
That's not up to me
So
Either way, he's trading fucking police secrets
Yeah, like they're, for Marlboro points, the equivalent of like, prostitute Marlboro points.
Pussy points, yeah.
In like messages that they have, he's going, how much credit do I get for this information?
Yeah, right, exactly.
Like he's walking up with a gift card to this fucking woman snatch and just like fucking sticking it in.
He's getting titty tickets.
To like carnival tickets.
They just like, right, exactly.
This one is worth four.
You get four tickets.
So one of these women's turned out to be.
the woman who was forced to perform the sex acts on Driscoll.
So she told officers she was fearful for her safety
because she thought he was a cop
Because one time that she was forced to go with him
He took her to the police station
Through a bottom like a basement parking garage
Used his key card
Walked her right into the police station
Took information and then they went to a hotel and fucked
He fucking took her to the cops
station with him.
Yeah, you don't want to spook the prostitutes there, buddy.
They don't like that place.
So the second that happened, she was like, I don't want to fuck with this guy.
Yeah.
So according to the court documents, they discovered that the code name for Mr. Driscoe, he had
a cool code name, Carl.
He was The Guardian.
Oh, I like it.
Salt Lake City Police Chief Mike Brown said his department arrested Driscoe at the public
safety building and secured evidence as part of the Utah Attorney General's office
investigation.
after obtaining a search warrant,
police discovered he was accessing
the cop databases from his house.
They also said they found
electronic storage devices with names of undercarver officers,
Metro gang files, and other law enforcement
restricted documents.
You know what, that's a good thing, though,
because it means he's not doing it on company time.
Yeah, you're always looking for the silver lining.
Yeah, he's on the weekends, you know,
just a hobby he has.
So I cannot wait to find out what happens to this simp
because that's what this guy is.
He's a fucking nerd who wants to bang dirty pussy
And he was willing to fucking get cops fucking hurt
Are killed
Is that your definition of a sim?
I guess I'm a sim that too
Yeah, I guess you are
Aren't we all sims in our own way, Carl?
All right
So it's also costing the city of fortune
To have to do an information audit
To find out what the fuck this guy is sold
Who's he sold it to
And he's been with them since I believe
Like 2018
Oh bitch bitch bitch bitch
They don't know what other fucking deals
this guy's done. But the fact
that he's giving out undercover cops information
to a fucking drug dealer
fucking pimp
who's fucking drugging women up and making
them work for him is pretty fucked up.
And that's why I'm going to say, Kevin
Michael Driscoll is better
than what would you say a half million
picture fucking creepo
sitting in his room jerking it.
Well, here's the thing. This guy's putting
heroes at risk. I'm not going to tell
okay, here we go. I'm not going to tell people how to vote.
And I would never do that, but this guy is not a creep.
He is, he's devised a very smart plan if you didn't get caught, obviously, to, uh, to get pussy.
And, uh, fuck the police.
Ooh, I'm a big fan of his.
You love that guy, huh, Carl?
All right.
I'm just saying, he just, he's pretty cool to me.
So I'm just going to put to you this way.
This week, if, when you go to vote, remember, uh, how much you enjoyed listening to the audio of the New York show.
Oh, stop.
And then cast your, oh, stop it.
Bini.
I dare you.
I'm just fucking with you.
All right, pal.
Let's, uh, is it time for who are these creepos?
Who are these creepos?
That is correct.
And what we're going to be talking about today is crime stories with Nancy Grace.
Finally.
We could play this and someone could hear it.
All right.
Vinnie, why do we do who are these creepos?
It's because we need to prove that we are the number one true crime podcast on the internet today.
and the way that we do that
is by taking down the other podcast
one by one.
None of them can touch us,
but I will say this and I said it
at the Detroit show.
Nancy Grace might be the second best
to cry podcast. Dude, Nancy Grace
is a lunatic. I
love the show because she's so
fucking crazy. It's unbelievable.
This is all murder porn. That's all
this is. She's not, she doesn't
give a fuck about these victims.
She just wants to tell you about these crazy
heinous crimes and her kids.
It's, yep, and it starts off like this.
Three little girl scouts ages eight, nine, and ten, yanked from their tents in the middle
of a rainy summer night, horribly raped and murdered.
The only named suspect, Jean Hart, tried and acquitted.
This case goes unsolved.
Nearly 50 years until a local high school teacher
uncovers four potential suspects igniting a new investigation.
Do you know how many women have been laying in their bathtub
with just the shower nozzle on their fucking pussies listening to this going?
Oh, give me more of it, Nancy. Tell me more about the murders.
Hey, Benny.
Why does Nancy Grace's cadence enrage me?
Well, Carl, because you're a normal human being
And she went to fucking the William Shatner School of Broadcasting
Every fucking sentence has five periods in it
Stop ending the sentence in the middle of the sentence, Nancy
What do you think you are? Larry Kigg
All right
So immediately after we hear about this horrific, heinous act
These three little girls are out camping with their Girl Scout troop
They get raped and murdered
and they have to then repeat that again.
That's what this audience wants to hear.
Like, whoa, rape and murder.
One more time.
Can we get someone else to say it?
Three young girls.
Beaten, sexually assaulted.
Murdered.
I mean, that was immediately after she had just explained that.
She goes, and listen to this.
And the guy goes, three young girls.
Raped and murder.
Like, okay, we got it.
Well, she also has, this show is very poorly produced for a lot of reasons.
Number one being, because I.
believe it airs on television as well so what they're doing i don't think so it's on serious xm
it's sponsored by a tv network okay so i think it's okay i could be wrong i'll do more research
you could be right but what i'm trying to say is the transitions in the show are fucking
repugnant yeah because like she'll go obviously go to a break and there'll be outro music which
immediately fades into the intro music of them coming back and her playing again three young girls
raped and murdered.
Yes, yes.
There's a lot of resetting of things.
Now, what Nancy Grace
loves to do more than anything else in the world,
even more than talking about herself,
which is up there,
she loves to talk to parents
of children who are murdered.
This makes her so happy.
With me right now,
a very special guest
to my own heart.
This is Lori Lee
Farmer's mother.
Lori Lee just eight years old when she was murdered
during the Girl Scout murders
Miss Sherry Farmer is with us
Miss Farmer, thank you for being with us
Thank you so much
I don't feel right about you thanking me
Yeah, I wouldn't feel right about that either
It seems like you're exploiting her for your show, Nancy Grace
Well, at least she has morals and it's like, don't think me
I'm totally using you, don't it?
Yeah, I'm totally using you, don't know.
Yeah, I'm totally using you.
using you because this story is titillating.
Vinnie, what year do you think this crime took place?
I, you would think that it happened last month the way she acts, but this happened
to the 70s, I believe.
1977 is the year that this crime took place.
This is what we're talking about.
And they made it seem like they're, you know, they have all these new suspects.
They're reinvestigating it.
They never get to that part.
They just want to talk about this crime.
So this is Nancy.
Tell me more about how you realize your daughter wasn't there anymore.
Dude, you're joking, but that's exactly what happens here.
Oh, I've been listening to her show.
Okay, you know, it is completely insane the way she handles these guests.
I love it.
She rubs it in, like, you would think, like, this woman probably doesn't want to talk about that too much, right?
All these years since then, dealing with the murder of your eight-year-old girl,
probably replaying it in your mind over and over what happened to her before her murder.
No.
I bet you think about how she was getting raped
Every night when you lay your pillow
When you lay your head on the pillow
You imagine this man slicing her throat
From ear to ear I can only imagine
That's what happens right
Well not only that
Not only that this eight year old was raped first
She's like and I'm sure you probably
Goes to your mind all the time
Do you ever wonder about the penis size
Of your eight year old daughter's rapist and killer
I wasn't she just asked weird
I know it's like I wasn't trying to
But now I am thanks
Thanks Nancy
I've actually moved on
It was 45 years ago
I've moved on, but thanks for bringing that up.
All right.
So this is the other thing that we love to do with Nancy Grace.
Make it about her.
Yeah.
I love it when Nancy...
She has the exact same disease that Suttering John does.
Yeah.
Not alcoholism.
Right.
Yeah.
During an interview, you shouldn't be talking about your life too much.
You should be talking about the person that you're interviewing's life.
That's something positive and good needed to come from her life.
Ms. Farmer, after my fiancé's murder, I thought I knew it all about pain and suffering and grief.
It was right before our wedding, and it took me, sadly, well, over 20 years before I could even consider marriage.
Right.
Whatever.
Who cares how long it took you to get over it?
What do you think this lady has to go?
Did you ever get over it, Nancy?
Were you ever able to get over it?
So the guy who walked out here is Keith Griffin.
He was murdered before he married Nancy Grace.
And that really was a godsend for him.
Yeah, he was just in a restaurant, right?
Some dude walked in and tried to rob the place and shot him in the head.
From what I read, it was actually a coworker of his.
And the coworker was disgruntled.
He'd gotten fired.
So I think there was a connection.
I don't think it was just a random act of violence.
Okay.
But who gives a shit?
That was 1979 we're talking about.
Nancy Grace is still milking that.
Get over it.
move out.
Well, so is this lady on the phone.
Milking her daughter's rape and murder to be on Nancy Grace's show.
Let's hear Nancy make it about her again.
I've got to say, Miss Farmer, again, I thought I knew it all about grief.
But now that I finally have children, I don't think there could be any grief worse in the world than losing your child.
And you are such a better person than me.
You have so much dignity and you're so calm.
Yeah, she's calm because it happened 45 years ago.
People move on, Nancy.
People move on and live their lives.
Jen in the YouTube chat just really made me laugh
because she says that Nancy Grace's husband dodged the bullet.
In the most ironic way possible.
Yeah, that is correct, Jen.
And then just to prove that this is all about the titillation of this story,
she always has to do things like this.
For those of you just tuning in, this is Lori Lee Farmer's mother, her daughter.
Sherry's daughter, Lori Lee, was raped and murdered at the tender age of eight.
Can we just work that in there about 20 times during this episode, please?
An eight-year-old was raped and murdered.
Did we mention that yet?
It was this lady right here, her daughter.
Her daughter right here.
And then Nisi Grace says some really, it was horrible, y'all.
It was really bad.
There is some really dumb shit.
You, of all people, are saying you believe there could be other suspects.
Right.
Now, I always pay attention to what a victim's family thinks, because they, of all people, want the right guy behind bars.
So if the family believes it, then I believe it.
Oh, there you go.
Case closed.
Not the investigators.
not the police the family okay yeah who do you think did it lock them up
yeah i believe her district attorney i know that's what's so insane about that that really is
an insane admission she should know better she should know better than i know that she's just
fucking talking and grandstanding i know there's no way she can possibly believe that all right
so this is a really funny clip see if you can catch this this woman mentions the other children
that she has and she goes through and lists their ages i don't know if nancy can't count
or what's going on here?
Our children at that time were Lori,
nine, seven,
five, three, and one.
I always wanted four children.
And we had five.
You lucky lady.
I always wanted four children.
We had five.
Yeah, but now you have four, don't you?
I mean, that's pretty much what Nancy Grace just did.
Oh, no.
We had five kids.
She's like, I always wanted four kids.
It's hilarious.
Oh, Nancy.
So you guys don't even understand.
show is a treat. It actually kind of is. I was telling Brian Johnson this. I said,
Go listen to an integer story. I found it very clippable. Oh, my gosh. Did I just hear a
drop? What were you doing, hanging out with Brian Johnson? I was at your show that you invited
him to. So I was talking to Anthony about this thing. And Brian says to Iraq, he says. All right,
I got a couple more clips on here. This is ridiculous. Remember, 1977.
45 years ago.
Many people who are watching us right now,
we're not alive when this happened.
I wasn't alive.
Including us,
including us,
correct.
And she wants to find out how this woman reacted when she found out about this.
She wants details about this.
How hard did you come?
Did you know that this would one day make me a very rich woman?
Do you remember that?
Hold on, hold that thought.
I have a sponsor break.
I got to go to it.
And you cried all through the night?
Well, if you do have problem sleeping at night,
then I want to introduce you to sleep phones.
Do you remember that moment your husband told you that Lori had been killed?
Well, he didn't say she had been killed because we did not know that.
He said Lori had died in the night.
Right.
So we are trying to figure out.
Where were you sitting on the sofa in the bedroom and the kitchen sink?
We were in the living room.
And he and his partner said, we need for you to sit down.
Oh, dear Lord in heaven.
Yeah.
And I said, no, I'm not sitting down.
And Beau told me, and he looked, he looked like I'd never ever seen him look before.
Was he happy?
Please go on.
Whatever.
I know.
Your daughter's dad.
It probably was pretty shocking and awful.
Remember how this episode started off?
It started off by her saying
They were never convicted anyone of this
And now there's new suspects
So what the fuck is the point of asking the question
How did you find out how did you react
Where were you? Which room were you in?
Were you standing up?
Were you sitting down?
What does that matter?
And then Nancy decides to tell us even more information
That no one could possibly care about
When I was first told that Keith, my fiancee was dead
I didn't know any
Of the facts surrounding him
Of course I later learned he'd been murdered
but I just assumed he'd been in a car crash.
And it wasn't until several hours later,
I was at my local little Methodist church.
I had nowhere else to go.
And I was sitting across the desk from our pastor,
and I saw him right,
and I read it upside down, Bernstein funeral home.
That's when I knew for sure that Keith was dead.
And he, Billy, told me Keith was murdered.
Why is it we try to,
look for just even subconsciously for a rational explanation.
First off, that's not a real question.
You know the answer to that, Nancy.
That's a really darn question.
That was absolutely not a real question.
She just wanted to make that about herself again.
Yep.
Yep.
That's all that was.
She had to go through the whole fucking story and that's, I was in shock and then I found
out he was murdered.
Why do people hate it when their friends and loved ones are murdered?
Well, what do you think?
What do you think, Nancy?
I don't know.
What an interesting question?
holy shit so uh this podcast i understand how you get enjoyment out of it because i did find it extremely
clippable i'll give you that but nancy grace wears on me man this is the first show that i've listened
to for watp because we did this for who are these creeps for detroit we did yeah and i started
listening to it just a few weeks ago it's the only one that i've ever subscribed to really only one
you listen to this for enjoyment now it's in there and i pop it on and i just left and i'll tell you
what folks when I hear particularly
interesting stuff I'm clipping them for this segment
you're going to get Nancy by the boatload
good good I need to
fucking day off if you can pull some
clips that'd be great if your computer
could pull some clips that'd be great too asshole
all right that wraps up this week's edition of
Creepos
I guess that means it's time for some voicemails and they are brought to you by
our good friends in Syracuse
The Creepoff voicemail segment
is brought you by the city of Syracuse
home to the famous Syracuse Petting Zoo,
where if you get bit by one of the foamy ones,
your next trip's free.
See you in Syracuse.
That's a good one, McBride.
Way to go.
I like it.
All right.
Carl, you asked the listeners a question last week,
and only one of them was brave enough to answer.
Hey, this is about that menacing girl threatening to kill you thing.
Absolutely, that would turn me on 100%.
No, Carl, a thousand percent.
There's just something about a fear boner.
All right, call me back
What is it about a
Fearboater?
Yeah, all right, cool.
I'm not the only one.
Yeah.
You're not alone.
Here's someone yelling at me.
Penny, you jackass.
You're in the Scum parade.
You had a Florida story,
yet you didn't play the fucking Florida theme song.
I was looking forward to jamming out to that tune.
A fucking awesome song, dude.
Make sure you fucking play it next time.
Retard.
Need the stingers.
Need the stingers, Vinny.
Come on.
I feel sorry.
I'm sorry, sir.
Do you have any voicemails, Carl?
I don't.
So everyone else who left us a voicemail,
Major League violated the 45-second role.
Oh, no.
A lot of long-winded ones.
And one of them was kind of funny,
and I'm only going to play you like the first 20 seconds of it.
And we'll laugh at that.
I've turned it out because it's rambling and pointless.
But what a good concept for a call.
Oh.
Vinny, this is your boss, Market Burrito.
And let me tell you, pal, I'm real sideways with you.
Real sideways.
Yeah, that's where it goes south, right there.
At first, I was like, okay, this is going to be good.
Hey, bud, whoever did that call, great concept, do better.
Try harder.
Try better next time.
All right.
All right.
Good advice for people.
I like that.
Yeah.
So, Carl, I guess that means we're going straight to a scumper.
Things are moving today.
I like that. Let's go.
Watch out for the scum parade.
Oh, no, it's a scum parade.
Oh, no, it's a scum parade.
Let's go out for the scum parade.
Making Vinny's day.
Day.
Let's start in Japan.
Yeah.
Did you like this story?
I did.
This story's just silly.
I can't.
believe this happened. A 65-year-old woman in Japan paid the equivalent of $30,000 in a recent
online scam that defied gravity. The con artist tricked the woman into believing he was a Russian
astronaut who just couldn't afford a plane ticket back to Earth. A rocket ride back to Earth.
I can't afford a ticket to get back to Earth. I always say, don't leave Earth if you don't have
enough money to get back home. That's just something I've always told people. I feel it's a good
advice. You know, if you can't schedule an Uber before you leave, think about what you're
up to. The pair started corresponding through Instagram on June 28th, and the scammer claimed
that he was a cosmonaut on board the International Space Station. He blamed the poor
cell phone service aboard the orbiting Space Station. No Verizon Towers out there, that's
lack of communications at times. The things between them quickly escalated when the fake astronaut
professed his love to her, claimed that he would want to marry her.
her once back on Earth. If only, I could get there.
Right. Except there's only the one problem. He simply could not get off the ISS unless he had
enough money for a ride back to Earth. Makes sense. Sure. In order to rendezvous with her online
lover, the woman ended up sending him 4.4 million yen, the equivalent of 30,000 American
dollarinos, so that he could hop on a rocket and leave the microgravity environment behind.
The victim was sold on pictures of space, the self-proclaimed astronaut put up on his
Instagram page.
Yeah, where else would you get those?
And the fact that he could name drop space agencies like NASA and Jaxa, the Japanese
aerospace exploration agency.
Not that impressive, but okay.
But everything else about his story was wildly inaccurate.
Starting with the fact that the ISS has no self-service and said astronauts use the so-called
space network, a network of communication satellites around the base antenna is to transmit
back to Earth.
Yeah, they have some technology up there.
Yeah.
The tech is pretty tight.
So they really don't spend their time.
time, you know, using Instagram, looking for dates.
No, probably not.
Yeah.
The ISS also does not work like an airport where you need to book a ticket to return
back to Earth, just the case anyone's currently being scammed and needed to know this.
Oh, yeah, I know.
No shit, Sherlock!
No shit!
When I read that in the article, I'm like, that sentence did not need to be in there.
Everyone knows that you don't buy tickets to get back to Earth.
Right.
Like, even if you bought, like, a fucking Virgin Rocket or whatever the fuck it is, ticket, it's
It's a round trip.
It's a round trip.
No one's going one way.
Yeah.
It's good point.
You fucking dummy.
All right.
Well, hold on a second.
Yeah, go ahead.
This $30,000 didn't all happen at once, Benny.
Oh, that's true.
There were five payments until she finally got suspicious and reported this to the police.
And like I always say, Vinny, my saying is, scam me once, shame on you.
Scam me twice, three times, four times, five times.
How fucking stupid are you?
How stupid is this woman?
She just kept sending him money.
What I like about this is, I can imagine his argument on how to get her the five times.
He's got to be like, honey, you know how ticket prices just keep fluctuating.
Every time I go to book a ticket, they're charging more.
It's unbelievable.
You want me to sit in coach?
Do you know how far it is to get to Japan from here?
I'm not sitting in coach.
There's no leg room.
There's no leg room there.
And the emergency exit aisle is another 15.
thousand dollars they really screw you with these things you want to you don't even want to know about
the carry-on phase yeah the policy for carry-ons is ridiculous i can't even bring a lighter by the way
the last sentence in this article says space agencies like nassafay about 50 to 55 million dollars
to get one of its astronauts up to the i ss and that just reminded me of uh the very important
Gil Scott Herron
poem
A rat done bit
My sister Nell
With Whitey on the moon
Her face and arms
Began to swell
And Whitey's on the moon
I can't pay no doctor bills
But Whitey's on the moon
Ten years from now
I'll be paying still
While Whitey's on the moon
You know
The man just off my rent last night
Because Whitey's on the moon
No hot water
No toilets, no lights
But Whitey's on the moon
I wonder why he's up in me
Because Whitey's on the moon
Well, I was already giving him 50 a week
And now Whitey's on the moon
Tax is taking my whole damn check
The junkies make me a nervous wreck
The price of food is going up
And as if all that crap wasn't enough
A rat doesn't bid my sister Nell
With Whitey on the moon
$55 million and sent one asshole
To the Space Station
Hey everybody
Does that piss you off? Does that piss off any other taxpayer?
Is it just me?
That's annoying, right?
Carl's been hanging out with Anthony Cuvio way too much lately.
I'm just going to say that.
I'm just going to throw that out there.
Oh, stop it.
All right, Carl.
Let's move on, shall we?
All right, let's go to Colorado.
You ever deal with, like, a physician's assistant, not your doctor, like, when you go and when they're busy?
Of course.
What's the deal with that?
Like, how, like, you're not a doctor.
You're like halfway there.
And some of these people are like, I don't know.
They don't, it doesn't feel right to me.
I always say no.
If I call and they go, would you meet with the, uh,
nurse practitioner or the so-and-so.
No, I don't want to talk to them.
Yeah, I'm paid for a service.
And I got to pay the same price,
so I got to talk to the person who knows less.
Well, hold on a second.
I feel like they're going to be able to identify the lumps on my penis
regardless of how much medical training they have.
Monkey pox.
It's not hard.
Everybody knows.
I know.
I just need the medication.
It's how I'm looking for here.
Okay.
I can understand that situation.
I'm just saying that I'm paying a premium,
and I'd rather get the most qualified person that I can.
that's just me
Mark Brian Jones
he's a licensed
Colorado physician's assistant
he's voluntarily surrendered
his license to practice medicine
after admitting he exposed himself
to a female patient
during a telemedicine appointment
and in a separate instance
yeah I think it's funny
that he agreed to get rid of his license
like as long as I just keep setting dick pics
to this chick is that cool
as long as she promises not to change her number
I'll quit my job
this fucking guy
he's 66 years old
He's permanently relinquished his license following a state investigation.
Now, according to the state medical board, Jones engaged in unprofessional conduct between June and December of 2021.
He was treating a patient for medical health concerns, which included prescribing medication.
Mental health concerns, right?
Yes, mental health concerns.
Sorry.
Those are the best patients to try to fuck, the mental ones.
Yeah, she's crazy.
I don't know what happened.
My diagnosis.
And she lies about getting dickpicks from her physician.
Yeah, that's one of her symptoms.
I have it. It's in her chart.
It's in her chart. It must be true.
That's the name of the episode. It's in her chart.
The report states,
Jones was subsequently fired at facility where he worked as a PA,
but he engaged in communications of a sexual nature with the patient,
including sending the patient nude photos,
conducted a telemedicine visit with patient in which he exposed himself to her.
This is, you don't go for looking for, like it must be hard to find.
to fuck a doctor in Colorado that you're still going back to this guy's fucking
office. When you start getting the dickpicks and you're like,
ah, I still need my fucking vagusil. I got to get going back whatever she's in there for.
And then she still goes back to this guy.
Well, he's fun. You got to give a bat. How often do you mess with your doctor and then it
turns into a jerk off session? For me, never. I don't know once twice a year.
Okay. Very forward gentleman. I like, he's like the physician going, does this look
infected to you? It's like, Doc, that's not the way this works. It's supposed to be the other way
around here. It's supposed to be showing you my cock. It's weird that he's always constantly
trying to measure him together. He's like, let's see what they look like. It's weird. Jones agreed
to the charges and agreed to permanently give up his license and consented to never reapply
for a Colorado license in the future. He's 66. It's time to retire. Yeah, it's good. I would
say so. Enjoy retirement, sir. All right, Carl. Here's a real piece of shit. A 51-year-old Tamerick
man is accused of molesting a partially blind 15-year-old boy.
Tamarack, where is that, Vinnie?
You got to get your shit together.
Why so many creepy bugs?
What the hell is going on there?
Maybe it's a swamp gas.
A playground.
Come on Florida
Tamirk, Florida. He's accused of molesting a partially blind 15-year-old boy with cerebral palsy and several other disabilities.
All right. That seems really heinous. But how else is this kid going to get laid?
No one's looking to fuck this kid.
Well, Saul Garcia was. Yeah, there's one guy.
He was arrested Tuesday in charge with lewd and lascivious molestation of a person under 16 record show.
According to the arrest report, Garcia was in the Lyme Bay Community Association Center
at about 5 p.m. Monday when he approached the teen from behind, groped his rear-ending crotch area
over his clovey. The teenager was washing dishes in the kitchen at the time.
Garcia left the kitchen momentarily to see if anyone was around and went back to fondling
the teenager.
Well, that's retarded.
A receptionist witnessed the incident that was also recorded on a surveillance video.
you shouldn't be molesting children in a community center is what you're telling me right
anywhere really oh right you shouldn't do it anywhere right yeah and i mean the kids trying to do
the dishes give me a break that's what my wife says when i come up okay so listen a lot of problems
here well one of the biggest problems is the fact that there's a uh oh retard alert
retard alert class i mean he's underage he's retarded there's a couple problems there
They asked him, were you blessed and he said.
How should I know? I'm retarded.
Deh.
After the guy gave him a reach around, he said.
Thank you.
I actually have the audio from the surveillance video.
Okay.
Jesus Christ.
Okay. Okay.
Who's that old guy over there?
Uncle Saul, Uncle Saul.
Uncle Saul. Perfect.
Okay.
bad man here's the worst part about this you remember how back in the day old i used to talk about the
perv switch yeah like a guy would be a dentist and he'd have the woman in the chair and for some reason
the perv switch just flipped in his head he's just like got to grab the tits yep okay if this is what this is
and the perv switched switched and he has to explain to investigators he can't be like come on look how hot
she was right yeah no one's going to relate to this this is the craziest like
thing that i could think you could do well when when a developmentally disabled blind 15 year old
what i see disabled people the last thing i think of is i really want to see that guy's dick
that's definitely the last thought on my mind yeah after i wonder if he wants to see mine yeah i don't
think that either okay just check i was just making sure all right okay cup check for me i got you
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah so that guy is ben arrested he's in the broward county jail on bonds
tolling $200,000.
And I like how they had to say,
the teenager did not consent to the fine line
and tensed up uncomfortably
when Garcia touched him.
Yeah, when guys come and grab your dick,
you tend to tense up a little bit.
I know I do.
It's not great.
It's not the best.
It's not what we're hoping to have happened.
This is going great.
Oh, Saul.
All right.
Let's talk about a story in India, Carl.
Grab your barf bags.
kids did you like this one india's nuts i didn't realize that india's worse than florida oh yeah by a lot
well one of the details in this story that i find fascinating is if you were one of these like
weirdo religions anything could be a ritual you just call it a ritual and then it's like oh okay
well it's a religious thing then that's fine yeah like passing around the money plate every
sunday yeah that's a ritual kind of kind of not quite like this one
An Indian witch doctor and his married couple clients
have been accused of chopping up women in human sacrifices
and cooking and partially eating them.
Yeah.
Convicted rapist Muhammad Safi was arrested this week,
along with husband and wife Ben Gavl and Laliyah Singh,
after the partial remains of two women were dug up in the couple's yard.
Police said Wednesday,
they brutally abused and killed a woman in rituals three months apart.
Police spokesman Pramad Kumar told agents,
murder was brutal. The manner of killing is indescribable, and they said
both victims were in their 50s. They were tortured for an hour before they were
beheaded and dismembered. With one hacked into 56 pieces, they told the
India Times. See, I can't even commit to Sunday mornings. This is why I'm just not a
religious person. It just seems like a lot of work. It's just the hours.
It seems like a lot of work. It's not the holes of the stories. It's not that.
You know what? I'm going to set my own religion and we're going to have robbing banks
will be a ritual for us.
Your honor.
It's a ritual.
That's how.
It's how we please God.
That's how we keep stuttering John's show going.
It's by robbing banks.
Yes.
And then paying for our beloved ones.
Kibo.
Lalea Singh later confessed the eating parts of the bodies,
claiming which Dr. Shafi promised it would bring them riches.
A portion of the bodies were cooked and consumed by the three.
I mean, did they stop and think, just go, wait a second.
Why wouldn't this bring us riches?
All right.
Did he explain that part?
No, you actually didn't explain that part.
Should we question about that?
It seems bizarre, right?
They wouldn't be connected in it anyway.
Police believe Shaffy was the ringleader,
say he hoodwinked to the hard-up couple after befriending them on Facebook.
Schaffey is a psychopath at a sexual pervert,
and the one who derives sexual pleasure and will go to any extent even to kill for it,
the police commissioner said, further calling him a sadist.
Yeah.
Got him there.
Hey, I don't see that in the Facebook commercials.
Wow, we connect like-minded people.
Like sadist.
We have a great new club.
You want to come and see it, bitch?
Have you noticed that two of these stories so far have involved social media?
It's pretty wild.
Biggest problem.com. Show. Voted up, people. Social media.
When all three were questioned together, Layla broke down and gave up details on the two murders,
blaming Shafi for all of them.
She said that she and her husband were having financial troubles with their massage parlor business.
And Shafi convinced them that human sacrifice was the best way to great riches.
Wait a second. So, your two.
telling me that these people were
in the service industry
and they weren't doing well? I'm shocked
by that. They seem so likable.
Yeah, these
are the two I want rubby'd me down. It's kind of
hard to thrive in a massage parlor
when you enjoy torturing, murdering,
and eating people. You're not going to get
a lot of word of mouth
advertising. So the first victim,
her name was Rosalind. She was a woman
in her 50s. They chopped
her into five pieces after being lured
to her house in June. Singing
cut off her breasts after the murder
the police said after the sacrifice
and not bring them the desired wealth
they killed again in September
that's the best part buddy is
their strategy didn't work the plan didn't work
they go okay what's plan B they're like
hey listen try it again we chop that
broads tits off on everything
and I still am in the negative
in my checking account right we're in the red over here
what's going on and
the guy goes all right I have another plan
let's do that to a different person
I think this time will be the chart
Yeah we just picked the wrong girl
Let's let's try it again
So this time it was a 52 year old victim
They chopped her into 56 pieces
They mutilated the woman's genitals
And slit her throat
Oh that's what God wants
Now God's gonna give you riches
Wait a second guys
On the first one did we remember
Immunealink the genitals?
We didn't meet with the genitals
That's what we fucked up
Gotta do it again
you got to write these things down step by step i actually have the audio of that murder too
all right i'm just kidding so an investigation and continuing to whether there may have been
more victims i mean there might a bed these people sound pretty dumb they're pretty fucking dumb
yeah so apparently abducting and killing people for wealth and superstitious beliefs is a crime
which is beyond imagine a nation in states like creola because it's a bigger city where this
happened. They say that these things, the occult remains widespread in many tribal and remote areas
of India. So this was a surprise to the police that this happened in the city. Okay. Okay.
Whatever that means. Because at the end of the story, it talks about how this happens in
India and it said earlier this month, two men were arrested for allegedly killing a six-year-old child
in the capital, New Delhi. The construction workers told police they were under the influence
of cannabis and murdered the boy as a sacrifice to the Hindu god Shiva to get rich.
Good shit.
And when I read that, I was like, did it work?
Because they don't tell you whether or not the sacrifice to the Hindu God worked or not.
It sounds like it got them arrested.
Oh, so it did.
So it probably didn't work.
Well, free room and board.
So there's that.
So your bills are being paid for.
And you get to do all that work and you don't really have any expenses.
Yeah.
So kind of worked.
There you go.
In essence, makes you a communist.
What happens is you just go to a prison camp and you work and you get free work?
Do you have any desire to ever visit India, Vinny?
I don't know if it's their PR or their marketing.
There's nothing I hear about India that I'm like, I should check that place out.
You know what I've realized?
I don't want to visit anywhere.
I know.
Even New York, I'm just like, I'll give me the fuck out of here.
I don't want to visit the parking lot here, Carl.
I don't want to do anything.
I know, Vinny.
Life is so difficult, isn't it?
It is.
Can I talk about how Newark is a piece of shit?
That airport is my least favorite airport in the environment.
entire world.
Burn it the fuck down.
And I forgot for whatever reason.
I'm like, you know what?
I'll go to Newark.
We'll get on a train.
He'll get right into Manhattan.
It'll be fine.
It's impossible to get to the train station from Newark.
There are no signs telling you how to get there.
Instead, employees shout at you would you do it wrong?
That's all that.
That's the only way.
That's their system.
And the guy even said, he goes, yeah, I know it's confusing.
They put up a fucking sign somewhere.
Hey, asshole, not that way.
Yeah.
Well, what's way should I go.
Well, I know it's confusing.
I think you don't want to go down the hall.
He goes, he goes, he goes, all right.
we got to get on this train
take it to this station
then you get off it
and then you get back on it again
but it's not that train
it's a different train
but it's going to be in the same spot
I'm like okay
so we get off
and then the guy goes
there's a bus downstairs
and I went oh they didn't say anything
about a bus
he's like yeah yeah yeah
well you gotta get on the bus
oh the bus is gone
it's leaving but actually
but actually this train also
like what the fuck
so last week after the show ended
Carl and I had a conversation
I asked him exactly
I said you know I got to get my tickets
where should I fly into
what do you think
and Andy went to JFK
you said go to Newark and I was like
oh shit he's right because you could just go
right through the tunnel right to Penn Station
right and get you right through but here's the deal
I got there I landed and I looked at
how much an Uber was and it was dirt
fucking cheap for New York to go to the hotel
I took an Uber and I didn't bother with any of that
shift when you told me that on Sunday
morning when we got up to go to the airport I said
we're taking an Uber I'm not going to fuck
with the train this time not dealing with it
yeah but because Newark has
to fuck me.
And I don't know if this is United or Newark.
I don't know whose problem this is.
But for whatever reason, we get our boarding passes on the phone.
It says gate C-88.
Awesome.
Take me to Terminal C.
Get it.
Get there.
Changed it.
Well, no, listen to this.
We had a little bit of time.
So we sat down.
We had some breakfast.
We're hanging out.
We're killing time.
I'm like, I should probably get over to gate C-88.
Now it's almost time to board.
Because I like to be the last person on the plane.
So we're kind of moseying down.
I get a text message, A-25.
Yep.
What?
You got to jump on.
a train to take you through two fucking terminals.
No, I had to fucking fight a bus shuttle
to drive across the tarmac to get to the
fucking thing. We were the last people on the fucking plane.
Anyway, fuck Nork. Dude,
the same thing happened to us. I
rode with our buddy Jay. Yes. The greatest.
He and I were on the same flight. Guy incognito
from the isotopes. Guy incognito
and I rode back together. And we
were on the same flight. And he was
so cool because he shocked me.
He comes up. He goes, bro, I got his club tickets.
And I'm like, fuck it. Hey, it's football
Sunday. We got like two hours before the
takes off let's go watch some football and kick back and do some drinks we have to walk through
two terminals to get to the fucking united club get there and they go we're not accepting day passes
we're full up you're out of lock guys dude i saw that and he fucking paid for that shit it was ridiculous
i saw that they were building a new club it was like in the work so they probably that's probably
why i don't care why in the c tunnel do you see that i don't know it was near there now okay
whatever i ended up in the a terminal i was supposed to be in the c terminal i was supposed to be in the
C terminal. I got there, went through security, looked at my thing and says, oh, now you're in the A terminal.
Yeah. So the same thing happened to you. Yeah. Fucking assholes.
Fucking annoying. New Jersey. Suck a dick. Guess what? Biggest creep from newer coming next week, bitch.
Let's do it because honestly, the other thing about New Jersey and specifically this part of New Jersey, I know it's the garden state, but it looks like a dystopian shit hole. Everything about the landscape there. It's like, oh shit. Is the war still happening? Or did it just end?
I don't, that's what it looks like.
I don't remember being as bad the last time I was looking at it as it was this time.
This is actual audio from me on the train.
Jesus Christ.
Dude, I looked out the window and like the fucking Sopranos music started.
It was just fucking shitholes.
Yeah.
I had to bury a body at one point.
I do not like visiting Newark.
It is no fun.
Guess what?
Biggest creep from Newark.
Coming your way next week, everybody.
Until then, remember, get your t-shirt, 24 hours left.
to get your zombie viny zombie carl t-shirt at htb kicksass dot com support the show on patreon
and supercast and until next time it's nice to be important it's more important to be nice
galaga just kidding it's kidding hold on a second oh you're playing a certain i certainly am
It's the Creepaw.
Right now?
Well, let me know what I can talk to.
I'm scared me.
I don't know.
That's why I want to talk to you on 10.
That's why I bring you up now.
Okay.
Hi, HGB kicks ass.com.
HGB kicks ass.com.
