The Creep Off - Episode 144: Creepmas 3: Leather Kilts and Mistletoe

Episode Date: December 19, 2022

In this very special Creepmas edition of the show we celebrate Karl's birthday with the biggest holiday themed creeps we could find, and we finally accept your listener challenges: In the scum-parade we meet a jealous Chinese vlogger, a self-conscious pervert and a little boy who granted his own Christmas wish! Check out the stories here:Police: Customer shoots St. Louis KFC employee over no corn (msn.com)Jail for voyeur who filmed men showering at Anytime Fitness; claims he did so because he felt ugly - CNA (channelnewsasia.com)Chinese Food Blogger Stabbed to Death by Rival Influencer During Livestream in Nepal (ibtimes.sg)10-Year-Old Who Killed Mom for Not Buying Him a VR Headset to Remain Jailed – Crime Online

Hey everyone, this is Tucker Tillson, hopefully your favorite creep-off contributor. Better than McBride, better than podcast with a very special announcement. We're releasing the first ever Creepoff NFT collection, right here, right now. They're called Crypto Digital Currency and their trading cards. These have really incredible artwork. Here's one of the average creep-off fan going to the subreddit to vote for whoever they think can a mile faster. This one is Vinny losing five votes and having to jump into a lake. And here's a great one of Carl converting to Judaism and trying to convince Kanye to do the same.

Each one of these creepos tells a great story, like Vinny's Santa creep that assaulted children. Or this one of Carl's creep, murdering Dave from Canada, who, I was told, frequents gay clubs. If you would like to be a part of history, all you have to do is leave your credit card in your gym locker and Chad will come by and drop off an NFT exchange. Oh, I think this one will be super popular. Anyways, that's all I got. This is Tucker Dilsen saying, don't forget to tickle your pickle. Attention parents, what you're about to see is not suitable for kids. Shoot, it's not even suitable for some grown-ups.

You might want to walk away now if you ain't into these type of things. I'm going to give the people what they want, sensation, horror, shock. I'm going to deliver the goods, because I'm alive, and I'm not backing down. Gooku, go, go, go, go. I'm going to fuck with my beard. It's not real. No shit. Well, it was real, but you see, I got sick, and all the hair fell out, so I had to wear this fucking thing.

How'd you get sick? I loved a woman who wasn't clean. Mrs. Santa? That was her sister. Disgusting Vomomomit-inducing thing Ola Creepos Welcome to another edition of your favorite

True Crime podcast, the show about creepy. Bye creeps for you creeps. I am your ho-ho host. Viddy the Pooleino, and there he is, the birthday boy himself, the Christmas boy. It's hot cucka-c-cara. What is happening? Vinnie Paulino. How you do, buddy? I'm really great, man.

We were just on the Dick show. We recorded it yesterday. It'll be out tomorrow, the 20th, number 20th. So we did a little mini scum parade on there. That was very exciting. It was nice of Dick to have us on there. So for those of you've never heard of Dick. Masterson and don't listen to his show. Maybe you should check this one out.

So be a good one to check out, about a half an hour in to the episode. Yeah, we had a really good time. Now, Carl, yes. I'm really happy right now. Well, what are you happy about many? Well, I'm happy that we're here celebrating Crete Miss for the third time. Me too. That's always exciting. I agree. But I'm even happier about the results from last week. Oh, shit. Were you even talking about that already? Oh, yeah, son. Seventy-eight to 72. Come on. Man, this is a huge deal that's going on. It's four to one. It's four to one.

There's going to be a Christmas miracle. I'm going to get my paycheck on money back before New Year. That sucks. Vinhausen for the win housing. That sucks, Vinnie. I'm playing this game hard. What kind of present is that, Vinny? What kind of gift is this?

I gave you a gift. It's in front of you. That's true. You did give me some white claws. There's another holiday happening today, Vinny. I know we're excited about Chris. We're excited about Hanukkah. We're excited about my birthday, but it's also...

What is it? What are the chances? This keeps happening, too. It is Super Champ Monday. Whoa. Did you know that? Carl. That's right.

We got the bell. Oh, I knew. And Turbo Neal Breen, which is me having a birthday for 10 bucks. Thank you very much, Turbo Neal. And keep the Super Chats coming. We'll read them at the end. All right. Yeah, make sure you send in all of your birthday.

Super Chats. We'll read them at the end. Now, Carl, it's a traditioner out here. We celebrate Creepmas, which is the biggest creeps that we could find, where the atrocity revolves around the holiday. Correct. We found some doosies in the past, but it seems like a never-ending well. I got to tell you, a lot of shit goes down at Christmas. It sure does. It's not a great time of year. It's actually a wonderful time of the year to be a creep, because no one's expecting you. Because everybody thinks that, like, everybody's in a great mood like they are. And it just turns everybody into a bunch of victims. Is that why?

I thought it's because you're forced to hang out with your family who you despise. I thought that was the reason why shit goes down in the holidays. It doesn't help. Right. It does not help. Now, Carl, I won last week, so that means I get to go first. Can I get a little ring a ding ding ding of that bell? I do not like how upbeat you are today.

It's obnoxious. I don't like what's going on right now. I don't like what's happening right now at all. Well, it is 4 to 1, which means it's game point. So here we go. All right, let's do it. Now, we all know the story of Matt Lewinsky. We do.

The Michigan man, podcast hitman, who may or may not have partaken and eating back bacon. Well, this gentleman, I hope, ends up as his roommate in prison in Michigan. Matt Lutonski was a married father of four, Carl. He appeared to live a very normal and productive life. He graduated in 1991. He had a master's degree in chemical engineering. He worked for the Dow Chemical Corporation in Midland, Michigan, until he was fired from what I understand for selling his own homemade brand of personal lubricants to his coworkers.

You can get fired for that? It's probably not a good look to go around and say, hey, you want to buy some lube? Or on the water cooler. I mean, they're fine with like Tupperware and shit like that. I see that work all the time. Girl Scout cookies, no problem. It is a problem, though. Nobody likes that shit.

Oh, okay. Okay. Well, his wife divorced him in 2001. And according to reports of his divorce, his ex-wife claimed that he refused to take any medication. And when he was off his prescribed medication, he would act erratic. Now, what does erratic mean to you, Carl? Oh, I don't know, probably yelling at their partner too much. Sure, sure.

Maybe driving fast down the road. Well, my guy, Mark, would watch torture films and then, threatened to torture his children's pets. Oh, I wasn't thinking that. That's not something I was thinking for. Yeah, that's a little past erratic. Yeah. We don't know if he did anything to the animals,

but he did threaten them. Now, by 2013, he was being arrested in charge with kidnapping for allegedly taking two of his four children from his ex-wife. So he played favorites, apparently. Well, can you kidnap your own kids? Come on. Certainly. Let it go.

Certainly. Just trying to be a good dad. Like, when you leave in a divorce, you should be able to take half. Correct. Yes, he gets half the kids. The charges were dismissed after several competency hearings. Okay. And he got the kids back.

Then around that time, Mark came out as bisexual. Oh, okay. You're going to win this week. All right, can I do mine now? Nope. Oh, I thought that was... No, no. He embraced what most folks would call a pretty heavy party lifestyle.

Now, I'm going to show you a picture of him. I believe this is the picture that he used. used on his Grindr profile there. That's gross. That's him in a really cool leather kilt that's going to come into this story

quite a bit later. You know, I can't tell if it's badass or just the opposite of that. Because he's trying to look tough, but that outfit... I don't know how to describe this other than just proud.

Now, he was also a big fan of the cops. This is him and the man that he married in 2016 after he met him on Grindr. This guy's name is uh jamie arnold so he's pretty hot they love the cops for him they love the cops so he decided to divorce him not too long after they got married because this lifestyle that

mark was going for was a little too much for him he said he would come home at all hours and there were always people at his house yeah and he was his husband was in there just fucking dudes and be like come on hop in jamie and he was like i would just make a sandwich and go to bed this really wasn't my thing. So, either way, that marriage broke up. Now, see, this is insane to me because that's the fun part about being gay. That's, I mean, why not take advantage of that? There's not a lot of straight orgies happening in my living room.

No, not in my living room. If you take the TV away. That's a good point. In October of 2019, James Carlson, 48 years old, called 911, claiming that he'd been kidnapped and woke up in a basement. I listened to this 911 tape. It's very, very hard to understand what he's saying, but here's the gist. He said, quote, I met this guy, I'm by, he's cute.

He hit on me at the bus station. He's cute, he said to 911. Yes. Yes. What's his penis size, sir? Please. Too big. He goes, I don't know.

We went to the car and talked. He went to the store, had a soda. I woke up in the basement. Okay. Carlson told the operator he'd been chained up and freed himself using a butcher knife to cut off the leather strap that bound his wrist. No, good thing. There was a butcher.

knife laying around in the basement. He escaped the house, the butcher knife in hand, stole the guy's keys, but couldn't get the car out of the garage, so ran away with Mark Lutonski's car keys, found a phone. What do you just want a souvenir or something? That time I was abducted. I think his idea was so the guy

couldn't chase him down in his car. Oh, okay. More practical than my thinking, then. He said he didn't know anything like that. Cops showed up within 10 minutes, and when the cops get there, they did the Dahmer thing. Gross gay sex. And the guy, the one dude was like, just give get me out of here i don't want to be here anymore right give me away from him and they filed no charges

on mark even though he drugged and kidnapped someone and locked them in the basement well he could have said that he was into it and that guy might have blacked out and forgot sure well six weeks later after carlson's running with latinsky on the afternoon of november 25th 2020 a 29 year old man ran out of his house and called 911 wearing a leather quilt letonsky chased after him he told 911. I'm trying to get away from some creepy guy. He had me tied up in his basement. The man told the operator from a neighbor's house. He was getting younger guys now. That's cool. Yeah, man. Good for him. Yeah. According to an audio recording released by the county, he said he's after me. He went to the neighbor's house, begged for an address. A state trooper

showed up and Latunsky says, hey, listen, man, I just want my kilt back. Okay. Just give me my kill back. Fair enough. No further questions. He gets his kilt back and the cop was like, I think my work is done here. Perfect. Not caring about the fact that this dude had drugged a dude and locked him up in the basement previously. Go Michigan. Whitmer's doing a fantastic job over there. Yeah. About your business, sir.

You know what? This is actually a really good idea. I have one of those like cards that if you're related to a cop, they'll give you that sort of thing. But rather than use that, have you ever have that before, Vinnie? We're like, listen, officer, I don't know if this means anything.

It probably doesn't. I'm not trying to insult anyone but my cousin happens to be a police officer maybe you know them you know you pull that little thing i i think from now on next time i get pinched for i don't know murder d ui whatever it is you're just gonna be all i'm doing gay stuff yeah i'm like oh my god please i don't want a breathalyzer my mouth tastes like um i just sucked off so many dudes and i haven't even swallowed it all yet officer get up here close you can smell you can tell come here come here come here come here by you as you were sir on your way my mouth smells like an indoor pool you're familiar with this oh you're disgusted all right so uh this leads us up to christmas eve of 2019 Carl okay

and a young man named Kevin Bacon hmm I'm familiar not that one oh he went missing he was I believe 22 years old. He was last seen by his video doorbell leaving his house Christmas Eve. Christmas Day, his family reported him missing because he never showed up for presents. And when I tell you that this kid was like a flamboyant young man,

he already had a receding hairline and he would dye his hair hot pink. And he was just like a little doughy thing. Little roly polly doughy guy. Okay. So, like a young Vinnie Paulino. Got it. His car was found at a family dollar. No

sign of him in his apartment. And then his roommate... He wouldn't be caught dead of the family dollar. I think something suspicious here. I mean, I saw the hair dye. It could have been Kool-Aid. He might have been going to the family dollar. But either way, his roommate says he was going to go hook up with some guy on Grindr on Christmas Eve.

Well, that led the cops through cell phone tracking to my pal, Mark Littinsky's home. Okay. Now, this took two days to figure out where he was. and on December 27th, they knocked on his door and he answered the door wearing the leather kilt and no shirt. It's his favorite outfit. He's just saying, hey, what's up, officers?

And they said he did not appear nervous at all. What do you think that kilt smells like, Vinny? An indoor pool, Carl. Yeah, okay. Your breath. It smells like your breath. Carpeting around an indoor pool, yeah. So police found Bacon's body in the house

lifeless and strung up in the basement. now they go to mark and they say uh excuse me sir could you please explain why did he let him in his house he doesn't have to do that he just was like come out it he let him and they they went down to the basement never never say come on into vampires or cops all right that's just not a good idea they have to be invited in yes never invite them into your home right they say to what the fuck happened here and he's like well i met this dude on grinder and uh you know he uh he came over and i brought him down here, and then I stabbed him in the side, and then I grabbed him by the hair and slid his throat. And then I just tied this rope to his ankles and just hung him up over

the ceiling like a deer. And I kind of left him there for a little while. And then I went back with my knife, and I cut off his testicles, and I fried them up and ate them on Christmas morning. So I'm guessing the officer was just like, is this something that all gay guys do? Is Is this like a kink or something? All right. Well, have a great Christmas. He was just going, P. Hey, Sarge, you got to hear this one.

He murdered this man, and he chopped off his testicles and fried them up and ate them in a pan. Now, Carl, here's a fun part. After they read him his rights. What's the best way to prepare men's balls, Vinny, do you think? I think I would go with fried, but I'm just curious if there's a better way to do it. Can you put it on a pizza? well but how do you cook it first don't you boil it Carl it's on my deep area of expertise

do you use a batter do you bread it? No I have a lot of questions Maybe cooking in some sauce Oh there you go That's not a bad idea So they say to well why did you keep this guy's body hung up here like this He goes oh well you know he was kind of like a Native American He wanted to use all of the buffalo and he had a plan

he was going to use his blood and bones to fertilize plants on his property, and then he was going to use his muscles to make jerky. Fun fact, when his mail got delivered a few days later, he had ordered a food dehydrator. All right, so he had thought this through a little bit. Yeah, he had thought this through. He wasn't making this up on the spot. Which ended up being a real problem for him when it comes to an insanity defense.

Well, they're like, well, dude, you ordered a fucking food dehydrator. I think that's insane. I'd go on with that. Oh, it's insane. I mean, you were clear of mind to be like, oh, this is how I'm going to do this. It wasn't just fucking blah, spontaneous crazy. Crazy people use Amazon, too, man. It's not that difficult.

You can get everything with one click now. Carl, I know the mentally ill-used Amazon. Yes. Now, fun story, the house went up to auction. Okay. In February after this had happened. And the dude who bought it, here's a couple quotes of him. He said, the base with the done, the master bedroom in the kitchen, specifically the dishwasher, I had to clean up human remains.

they just left that shit in the house and the guy bought it in an auction and he comes and this is what he finds I wouldn't have hired someone to do that three sets of dishes with human remains on them all three sets are in the dishwasher he goes and the dishwasher

never had electricity to it it was brand new and never set up it still had the plastic on the outside of it all right well he's going to get to it eventually yeah they would have let this guy go through this plan sure sure Now, in January of 2020, he entered an insanity plea, but that February of judge ruled he was incapable of standing trial.

So originally they were like, this guy has to be insane. But then by October of 2020, they reversed that decision saying he was able to stand trial. The trial started in July and just concluded December 16th, life in prison for Matt Lutonski, which is why I'm saying. I hope he ends up being cellmates with Matt Lewinsky. That would be awesome. That would be fun. Yeah. That would be amazing.

Get mad something to do. It would. So that is my creep this week. Matt Luttsky. All right. Very good, Vinny. He enjoyed a Yule log on Christmas morning. What a nice presentation that was.

Now, I said I would leave Super Chats to the end, but we had a couple really nice ones come in. Oh, okay. That I did want to acknowledge. And I don't know if I can get my mouse working over here. I don't think I can. Oh, wow. Vinny, can you pull up those chats? I sir cut.

Tricky Daddy, 4999. I'm sorry I thought I was donated to an Uncle Rico YouTube live stream. please refund the money back to me skull is that tricky dicky right yeah yeah thank you very much that's awesome minus 30% yeah there will be no refunds i don't see the money until the 21st and then ase presents uh 50 bucks thanks for making so much content every week y'all from mince salad actually yes thank you oh thank you very much you're so sweet that's awesome all right you're ready for my uh we'll read the rest of those at the end you ready for my christmas creep if I have to. I think you know who this guy is. I thought Biden was so good. We don't even need to know.

I think you know who this guy is. His name is Dorel Brooks Jr. Dorel Brooks Jr. 40 years old was convicted on October 26, 2022 of six counts of first degree intentional homicide and 70 other counts related to the Waukeshaw Christmas parade on November 21st, 2021. Yeah. Last year, he gave us his heart. Yes. So. At the time of the parade, so if you remember, this is the guy who got in his SUV. He was driving a red Ford Escape, and he actually was able to escape. He was driving a Red Ford Escape through a parade, killing six people, injuring many, many more. One of them was an eight-year-old kid. Some elderly people were in there as well, the dancing grannies.

He plowed right through them. It was a horrific scene. The dancing grannies, what is that, like a Dave Matthews cover band? Yeah, they're not that great, though. The violinist, yeah. They need to upgrade at that position. I'm not a fan. At the time of the parade,

Brooks was out on a thousand-hour cash bail related to charges filed earlier November because he was charged with punching and then running over the mother of his child, the next girlfriend, Erica Patterson. He's not great behind the wheel. Yeah, so he had already, in this month, run over someone.

He was in jail for it. They let him go, all right, we'll see you back at court. Bye. You enjoy the Christmas Parade. Yeah, exactly. So this is the best part is that he was over at Erica's

house before he went to this parade. Sure. And they got into a big fight. Oh, no. And he assaulted her. This girl, Vinny, you've ever had an ex-girlfriend who just knows how to push your buttons?

Just says the shit that, like, you want to murder people? I have a wife who knows how to do that. So I get this. Like, this guy, hanging out with his baby mama, ex-girlfriend, Erica's saying all sorts of crazy shit to him and he's just like, bitch, I already tried to run you over this month

but this time, you're lucky. I'm going to let you off the hook and take this out on a bunch of people or just celebrating the holidays in the middle of the street here in Wisconsin. Okay. So what he did was with all of his rage is he decided to go ahead and drive through that. Now, they didn't catch him at the time.

He drove through four blocks of this parade. up through the entire parade and then just drove home. So the police call him in for questioning on the domestic violence issue. Sure. The best part about this, Viti, because they didn't... Did he have one of the dancing grannies just hanging off the grove? They pulled up to the police station. They didn't let on the fact that they, he was a suspect for plowing through this parade.

He drove his red ford fordiscope to the precinct for the questioning. And then they're like, by the way, we happen to know for a fact that that car that you drove here is the one that went through the parade. He's like, what? That's not what you told me I was coming down here? What the fuck? You can't trick me like that. You can't make me drive the evidence to you unless you tell me I'm driving the evidence to you. Well, it's funny you say that, Vinny, because he does think he knows the law, this, this Derell Brooks Jr. Dorel Brooks Jr. personally gave me just so many hours of entertainment over the last few months. Oh, then you're going to enjoy this because he decided before his trial to fire his attorneys

and declare himself a sovereign citizen. He thought that he wasn't under the jurisdiction of Milwaukee or the state of Wisconsin. Maritime law, motherfuckers. That's right. Yeah. He marched to the beat of his own drum, this guy. So he had two attorneys assigned to him to try to help him reduce the sentence or whatever. Okay.

And he said, no, I got this. Don't worry about it. He's so bad at law. He's so bad ass. So I brought some fun videos for us to watch from his trial. This is really turning out to be a Merry Christmas episode. Good job, Carl. This one's fun.

All right. So, video number one, let me just set this up. All right, here we go. So Brooks called his ex Erica Patterson as a witness. And what he wanted to do is he wanted to show that she isn't a good mother and she isn't telling the truth. So she's not a good witness for this type of thing. And he pulled out photographs that the prosecutors hadn't seen before.

You get to enter everything into evidence before the trial so everyone can look it over. So all of a sudden, he just like pops his shit up. He's like, yeah, what about this? What about this? And they're like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, you can't do that. And so now the prosecutor has to say, all right, if you're going to enter that evidence, then we're going to enter some other evidence that we weren't going to enter. And this kind of blows up.

Your Honor, exhibit A his fucking bumper. Yeah, right. This kind of blows up on Brooks a little bit. Check this out. Here we go, kids. This guy's the best. I believe that these photographs are designed to make a suggestion to the jury that Erica Patterson is a bad mom. I think that that's what the.

defendant is trying to do. And if we're going to go down that road, then we would be forced to counter that claim. First of all, it doesn't make her an incredible witness, if it's even true. And second of all, if we go down that road, we would be forced to counter that claim by pointing out that not only does the defendant not live with the child in question, he doesn't live with any of the other children that he has. He impregnated Erica Patterson when she was a minor in Nevada. And for doing so, he was convicted of statutory sexual seduction. 2007 to that felony offense and is a sex offender on the registry as a result. So if there's any causation that would lead to Erica Patterson being a bad mom,

Mr. Brooks has a direct role in that causation. And that's furthermore, I'll check to that. I'm not because that's a lie. Let him finish. Let him finish. Since he want to make a record and not be accurate, so let's be accurate on the record since you think you know so much. Once again, Mr. Brooks is being loud, disrespectful, disrespectful, interruption. We can ask that question to me.

He is over the top and animated right now. Mr. Brooks, I'm ordering you to sit down and to let the state minutes. I'm not going to see her unless somebody be in accurate on the record. Did you know she was 18 when I met her? Did you know that? So I did a quick cut there. The judge says, okay, we're taking an hour for lunch. I'm not going to have this disrespecting going on.

And he's like, they're saying that I had sex with the minor. She told me she was 18. It has nothing to do with anything. He was convicted of that. Did you, is the mother of this child? Was she a minor when she, would she conceived? It doesn't matter how old she told you she was. Yeah, exactly.

It does not matter how old she said she was when you impregnated her. Prosecutor. Oh, man. So this is great. So this guy's like trying to use big words and he thinks he's like doing stuff like he's constantly objecting. Every single question asks, he objects. He's like hearsay, leading the witness.

None of it makes any sense. It's really funny. And my video number two here is just, he just, he just keeps interrupting the prosecutors and the way this the judge has to call it on this one she she once again says okay we're putting this to an end your honor when i leave the table i'm away from the courtroom and i have to elevate my voice this is the so she had the alleged record of able to stop talking oh man like i don't know who y'all be thinking y'all fooling i'll set the value and turn for this uh document one more interruption and you're going to be removed to the next courtroom. That's what you want to do anyway. It's not what I want to do. Do not interrupt Attorney Opera. So, can you sleep? Your Honor, I believe he has seven prior criminal

convictions. O.W. I second from 1997, and OWA third from 1997. Watch this, a minute. And OW.I. 4 from 2003. Criminal trespassed dwelling from 2006. I need to take a break. This man right now is having a stare down with me. It's very disrespectful. He pounded his This frankly, it makes me scared. He is giving daggers to the judge just staring at her, not blinking, not moving with a scowl on his face. He looks like he wants to murder the judge right here. That is the face of a caveman who is about to drag you by the hair out of a room. It beats you to death.

That's a scary man. If he's trying to get some sympathy from the judge, he's going about it the wrong way. Holy shit. So eventually because of this behavior, he's constantly at. interrupting people, he's threatening the judge, they say, okay, we're going to move you to the next courtroom over, and we'll set you up with AV, so you'll be able to see what's happening here. You can still talk to us, but the judge has a mute button on his microphone. So if he's being disrespectful, she can just mute him, which is, by the way, something I want to install in this studio. I actually have it from this end. Oh, fuck. All right, so this is video three. He's got a shirt off now. Ordered Mr. Brooks be removed from the courtroom due to repeated interruptions and disruption with the court. You can see that he is seated with his back to the court or to the camera. He took his shirt off as well.

I'm also told that he is threatening to throw and break items. Yeah. He's sort of a little temper tantrum now. Now they've kicked him out of the courtroom. Well, he's lonely, Carl. He's a little lonely. Probably. All right. Now, video number four is just an example of Dural. You need to explain everything to this guy. I don't care what you believe fully. All right. It's not a game. I don't take this as a game. That's what nobody, that's what nobody, you don't got to explain nothing to me.

That's what you don't understand. You think that this is a whole game to me. This is not a game to me, Your Honor. All right. I think that everyone's quite aware that we do need to. explain everything to you because you have no idea what is going on. Correct. This is why he has six life in prison convictions on him. All right. Here's, this is my favorite. There's a lot of eyewitness testimony, obviously, because it's a parade.

If you want to murder a bunch of people doing it in the middle of a parade's probably a bad idea, that's where all the eyeballs already are fixated. Correct. So there was a lot of eyewitness accounts. This one was my favorite one. Video number five. Okay. And did, I'm sorry to ask it this way, but did you see anybody, like, actually fly or roll or tumble?

Yeah, so originally it was, we heard sounds, like thuds, and then it was in the air, like bowling pins. The crowd of people were like bowling pins getting smashed by this SUV, that's not. Oh, man. That's awful. All right. I think I've made a pretty good case. Hey, everyone. Welcome to the big...

I made a pretty good case that this guy is a creep. But you know what? I'll let the prosecutor put the bow on this one for me. Oh, sure. Someone else could do your work. Yes. He plowed through 68 different people.

68. How can you hit one and keep going? How can you hit two and keep going? How can you hit two and keep going? How can you hit three and keep going? Didn't phase him a bit. He kept going until he got to the end. And there was no more bodies to hit.

Okay. So this guy is a creep. I've made that point very clear. But what makes him creepier than Vinny's creep who's frying testicles? I will tell you the answer to that. The freshest testicles guy could get. This guy, this fucking Dorel Brooks Jr. thinks he's a rapper.

Nice. This is a. a rap video and this song every line ends with what's the bidness and this is the

kind of rap there is just fucking no creativity here at all every single line ends with the same fucking rhyme the same word

it's not even a word let it play I'm going jumping off the train like what's the business I'm a pull up with the yay like what's the business

Eating nuts with the blood like what's the business A y'all double drum like what's the business What's the business? What's the business? What's the business? What's the business? What's the business? What's the business? What's the business? What's the business? What's the business? What's the business? What's the business? Catch me sliding to the trap like what's the business? Got to get it.

Granted, trying to make a stack like what's the best. That goes out of That's all that song does It is terrible What I really like about it is how He made a modest apartment kitchen Yeah Look so baller

I know It's such a shitty kitchen that he's in It's a small cramped kitchen He's counting his $100 bills Like why did you upgrade your living situation And then he's standing on the street in Las Vegas Like that's impressive Wow

You must really be a baller What's your business? He spelled it with BID N-E-S-S, yes. Spidness, yeah. Got it. I miss Run DMC. Me too. Am I alone in this?

Can we get some Christmas time at Hollis-Queen at the end of the show? No, because YouTube will get us. Oh, right, we can't do that. Well, just imagine that as a pallet cleanser. No, I have a fun song lined up for the end. All right, so that is my creep for creep-miss. Help me get back in this game.

I'm down four to one. I'll need your vote. Thank you very much to the Cuzzaroos in advance. Excelsior, true believers. Let's put this thing away. Let's make Carl spin the wheel next week. And next week, by the way, here's your teaser. Creep of the year.

Creep of the year next week. Now, it can be a creep we've already brought in, or can be just someone that we didn't even talk about up to no good in 2022. And Carl is working on a very special guest to join us for the episode, someone who's never done the show before, but apparently really wants to. Okay. Thanks for reminding me. That's why I got to start writing the shit down.

That's why I did it. Yes, I am working on that, Vin. And I swear to God, if it's Blind Mike, I'm going to fight you. We'll try with Blind Mike. It's great. Nothing. I love that guy. All right.

So next week, Creep of the Year, Carl, spin the wheel, vote for me. Oh, stop it. Perfect. Is it Boxing Day next Monday? I don't know, but we'll find out. That's out what I meant. All right. Are you ready for the best segment of the show, Vinny?

It's not the scum parade. Who are these creepos? That's right. It's time for who are these creepos. And this is a segment we've recently introduced into the show. The reason being is that we have the best true crime show on the internet. By miles. It's not even close.

Okay, maybe so are in scale. But other than that, no one beats us. And we want to prove that because I don't know that everyone's believing this. So what I'm doing is I'm analyzing every other true crime show one by one to prove that we have a better true crime show than anyone else out there. And today, I want to present to you gruesome, horrific true crime with Connie and Meg. This was a suggestion. That's the name of the show.

Yes. Grusome, horrific true crime with Connie and Meg. This is a suggestion from Nathan Strigao. Thank you, Nathan, for suggesting this. I want to start out by explaining. I kind of like the name. Okay. Okay, well, you're going to like this.

Listen to this woman's voice. Is it gruesome and horrifying? It's horrifying. annoying would be a better adjective but but remember I told you in 1972 was it 72 or 71 it was 71 yeah 71

okay yeah sorry that sex worker that Robert Hansen had raped that was actually 18 year old Sandra Patterson and she described in detail the man that had taken her at gunpoint and raped her so they say that he had only raped her but he had actually

abducted her as well. She said that he took her to a motel where he raped her, he hit her and threatened her, but she didn't react. She wouldn't give him like the benefit of her reaction. And she said that he was obviously disappointed because she didn't fight back like the other girls. And that's what he told her that because she wasn't fighting, it like killed it for him. I don't know why they don't call this the charisma and chemistry show because these two women are dynamite together on the microphone. Yeah, like a car and a crash. These two.

Let me tell you something, Vinny. This show is on Patreon. They have 675 patrons on Patreon. Now, their first tier is $1. But still, there's fucking people listening to this on purpose and giving them money, Vinny. This is what blows me away by these two crime shows. I'm like, there's tons. a shitty podcast out there.

I've documented that pretty well for the last seven years. But the fact that these true crime shows as bad as they are still have an audience is what's so annoying to me. You want to hear what they say on their Patreon page? No. We're Connie and Meg,

hosts of gruesome, real-life BFF goals, and after years of trying to hide our deranged sense of curiosity and humor, we decided to give up on normalcy and embrace our love of all things true crime and mystery. That was one sentence, by the way.

That's worse grammar than me. We started this... Worse grammar than me? It's one of the funnier things you've said on the shell, Biddy. Me failing, that's impossible. We started this podcast as an outlet for two busy moms to talk once a week about things we found interesting and horrific.

Surprisingly, by creating gruesome, we created a network that allowed us to reach out and meet so many awesome new friends and true crime connoisseurs. See, every single one of these shows is the same thing. Boring housewives, nothing better to do. They have to have their little phone calls every week. And they're like, oh my gosh, look at what I read on Wikipedia.

Robert Hansen. Have you ever heard of Robert Hansen, the butcher baker? Yes. Yes, we have. Everyone's covered it. We know. Carl, I like how the read on everything she said is just, there's nothing dramatic about it.

No. Like everything she said is like, and then he hit her, and then he raped her, and then he threatened her. Was that the order, honey? Is that the order that that happened? No, it's not.

And also, the things that they point out, so I hate these shows that just read a Wikipedia page to you or an article to you from the internet, because if I'm interested in that, I'll read it. But you have to add your own spice to it, right? You have to own your own analysis

this and things. That's what we do. Well, this is what these women do, too, brilliantly. And Meg is going to start. All right, all right. So, Robert Christian Hanson, which, what a middle name for the kind of human being this was. I thought the same thing. He was born the day after Valentine's Day in 1939.

So he's an Aquarius, too? Yes. E. E. E. Ooh. Immediately. Their first thoughts are like, well.

Oh, his middle name is Christian. He's Aquarius? Who gives a shit? No, this makes a difference. His dad's name was Christian. That's why his middle name is Christian. Who cares? I...

You know what we don't ever do on The Creepoff? Point out someone's astrological sign. I've never once been concerned about that. Agreed. I just want to say this, though. I think the greatest lesson WATC has been to me personally. It's just, boy, I didn't realize the details are so. fucking boring.

Yeah. Like I try so hard to make things interested, but man, the details of these things are so fucking boring. Well, look at the whole reason why true crimes are big categories, because we don't witness things like this in our day-to-day lives. It's amazing that someone would

actually go through with these horrific crimes. We don't want to hear it like, it's a fucking history lesson. Nobody wants to be back in fucking the classroom. Jodding down notes. What year was he born? Oh, yeah? The day after Valentine's Day?

Okay, get the shit. And then too many people take it the other way, where they over-dramatize it. Yes. And they have the fucking Foley work, the creaky door, and the footsteps coming in. Like, I hate that shit, too. Well, don't get me started on, and I'm going to draw a blank on this, but it's a pretty big show. It's that true crime show. It's all about rock and roll stars.

Oh, I know which one you're talking about. God, I can't think of the name of it. Oh, Disgraceland? Disgraceland. Thank you. Yeah. And what that fucking guy does that is so enraging. is he tells you specifically what people are thinking.

And then he entered the room and he remembered back to that third grade class when the teacher had told him, but I'm like, you're just making all this up. This is all just made up. This is fan fiction. It's not true crime. Correct. All right. Let's hear more about the butcher baker, shall we? His dad was a very strict disciplinarian.

And even though he was left handed, he was forced to use his right hand. And I know that seems like a weird thing to include. apparently this caused him to have a stutter. Vinny, that's kind of weird when your dad forced to use the weekend. Do you know anyone like that? Any creeps whose dad force him? Maybe, I don't know, Tua, the quarterback of the Miami Dolphids, he was right-handed, but he's forced to throw left-handed because his dad's a fucking weirdo.

There's Tua. Yeah. And my parents tried to do that shit to me. Did they really? I'm a lefty. Yeah, they tried to make me right with my right hand. all right we we need to discuss this did that cause you to stutter i do have a stutter you've not people who listen to the show know i have a stutter huh do you think that's why no

absolutely fucking that sounds retarded i think it's i have a fat tongue all right vanny and it gets caught up on my teeth these women crack themselves up now over what i'll ask you you tell me and he had an accomplice when he did this he actually had a kid that worked at his bakery with him and that kid told on him immediately which is how he got caught. Save.

Hi, sweet. So... It's funny. Well, I don't think it's funny. The gasping there. It's so unnatural. That was the most forced. Like, it sounds like you just been

stabbed a bunch of times. right it's not good broadcasting bennie it's not good and it doesn't get any better here and is my professional opinion that if your husband burns down a school bus garage you should leave him like probably just dip what better time than when he's in prison why not like this is a lot of red flags here the biggest red flag because it's on fire yeah you know it's not funny, but I'm, you know, I get it. They're tagging each

other's non-jokes. They're laughing about nothing. This actually is the clip that sums up the show for me. Do you know what make the show worse, by the way? If they didn't try to tag those jokes, if they still just let that shit hang. It's brutal. That's a red flag. Yeah, because it's on fire. Remember, he set the whole

place on fire. Fire's red. Right? Like, oh, dude. That's what sums up the show for me. Like, ugh, dude. All right, this one's just super obnoxious. So she's trying to explain how a child would tell a lie.

Okay. She might be retarded. I might have to retract all of this. Look, it's one of the cardinal rule of lying. You can't give too much information. It's too much detail. Yeah, you're giving too much. And it goes back to that infantile personality, too,

because this sounds like something. child would do when you're like, hey, did you eat the rest of the cookies? And they're like, well, well, well, I saw the cookies and I thought how much I would want to eat those cookies. And then I thought about my sister sitting on the couch and how much I'd like to bring her a cookie. So I took the cookies in there and we shared the cookies. But then I realized that me, I'm sorry, then I realized that the littler one ate the rest of them. So I threw it away, just like a tangent. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. What the fuck. is this supposed to be?

Dude, I don't know. Hold on to tell you. What the hell is he supposed to be? I don't know. Like, wow. I'm so confused by this, Betty. I'm listening to the show going, The kid is on the couch.

Who is listening to this? Who wants to hear these women? All right. Well, maybe it's because of the brilliant legal analysis that they bring to the table. But he's shown his ass enough times that the prosecution and the judge are like, no, like you still have to go to prison.

Is that how that has? happened? The judge was like, no, like, no, like, you, like, have to, like, go to prison. I think I might, like, send you to prison for a while, I think maybe. Like, ugh, dude. These women think they have personalities. This is what's so annoying to me, Benny, is that these women have no personality, as you can tell, just from these short clips I've already played for you. And other people without a personality listen to this and go, wow, this is dynamite content. I like the way she laughed at everything she said. Burn it down to garage.

That is funny. Fire is kind of red. Jesus. All right. One more clip and then we can move on with our lives. I just found this ridiculous because they're trying to figure out how to pronounce someone's name. And this guy, as you know, was living in Alaska. The trick to pronouncing people's names, by the way, is just say it with confidence.

Correct. I've learned that just recently, by the way. I don't think I ever get one right. But so I thought this was an interesting, well, no, not interesting. really, really dumb thing to say. So the first woman who Robert Hansen claimed to have murdered was Eklutna Annie. Eklutna, Eklutna.

That's kind of how I was saying it. Okay. At Lukena, Annie. If you're from Alaska and you're like, no biatches. I looked at the pronunciation guide, but I wasn't confident in their robot voices. So this is. Vinnie. I don't care.

I don't care. People in Alaska are going to be offended because you mispronounce someone's name. Vin, do you know what language they speak in Alaska? They speak American English. Yeah. She's like, well, look, I don't want to offend people who also speak the same language that I do. If I mispronounce this, this name. What do you think is going on in Alaska?

I hate the show. Yep, it's terrible. It's not great. Can we do voicemails? Let's go, let's move on to voicemails. Please, holy shit. Shit. Let's get done with these people. What's the name of the show again?

That show is called Grusome Horrific True Crime with Connie and Meg. Ugh. The creep-off voicemail segment is brought to you by the city of Syracuse. The new superintendent of Syracuse schools says he wants to bring pride back to the Syracuse school system. Pride declined. See you in Syracuse. All right, good job, McBride. Let's start off with this one.

Let's get this done because we started this show without any hot football talk. Hey, hey, hey, fuck you, Vinny and the Dolphins. And I say that as a fucking Dallas Cowboys fan who's hated a bills, his whole life living in fucking Western New York. Fucking, I really wanted this to be a congratulatory voicemail saying, fuck yeah the dolphins wanted fuck the bills but damn it can't say that so fucking fuck you've any

Carl you're still fucking fuck I'm very confused yeah he seemed happy about the bills winning at first and then he wasn't I'm confused about what that person was he's mad because the dolphins let him and me down by not beating that fucking I hate the bills fans so much I hate everything about that franchise

It was a great game. Great game, Vinny. Buffalo Bills remain the number one seat in the AFC. I'm looking for that first round buy in the playoffs. Guess what? Don't care. Hope we see you there. Hey, I got a voicemail for us today.

Yeah, go ahead. Man, what I love about Super Chat money is when you're in the middle of the sentence and go, oh, we got a $5 super chat. You're just like Sutterin' John. It's fucking pathetic. Save the Super Chat until the end of the fucking show. Or at least after you fucking do your creeps. God damn.

Is that fucking annoying when you interrupt the show with Goddiam? Try it in a little bit of that fucking singer is. But fuck off, Vinny, do it better, be better. I'm not doing that. Fuck off. Hey, Two-Face lying bastard. A down 99, happy birthday. Thanks, two-faced lying bastard.

Much appreciated, my friend. I just used the bell. All right, here's another voicemail. Interesting thought here, sir. Carl. Hey, I was just thinking that maybe we should look up girls from the scum stream who could read reviews and make them review girls. I'm sure they'd be up for it.

Call me back. So you're saying we should call up women that are in prison that we have featured on the scum stream to be our review girls? Some of them are hot. That's true. Some of the methods. We've never had an application for a review girl for the creep off. Neither is. Who are these podcasts?

You think there's an application process. What do you fucking just submit? Like people just... Yeah, you just send your nudes. Yeah. All right. Is you going to read or not? Send us your nudes.

The creepoff pot at gmail.com. Ladies only. Oh, fucking. We're going to have a naked potato. I guarantee it. Coming into that inbox. That fucking potatoes hung. Oh, man.

Here we go. You know what, Carl? Here's what. like to do buddy yeah what do you got i have some applications speaking of from listeners to challenge us oh right for the uh creep off listener challenge for patreon so i have narrowed them down to four calls great and uh i have some that are to me two of them are to you and then we could decide which ones we want to go with sounds good all right let's start let's do it hi my name is ken i'm calling about the listener challenge you guys have coming up

I am a patron I am one of the creepomaniacs I couldn't choose which one is either funnier or more lame and I would like to challenge Finney and the category I'm going to go with is creepiest family man

all righty thank you very much thank you fuck you and bye creepiest family man what does that mean like someone who is sired children, I think, I guess. Okay.

Well, you have to, well, you can't just, like, leave them. You have to, like, be a stay-at-home. I don't know. We'll have to clarify that. That's an option. Okay. Sounds good. I'm calling for the listener challenge.

Oh, this is Evan Michael, by the way. I'm calling for the listener challenge. I'm challenging Carl to creepiest animator. And I'm not telling you who I'm bringing. Am I supposed to tell you who I'm bringing? I can't remember. We'll work that out. Well, anyway, I'm challenging Carl, the creepiest animator.

I'll see you there next Sunday. Or, I mean, Monday, or whenever the fuck this is. Thank you, fuck you, bye. All right. All right, well, I call Walt Disney for that one. I think I'm going to win. Oh, shit. That guy's a fucking creep at a half, but all right.

What else he got? Hey, this is Nick from Michigan. I'm a $5 patron, Carl Cuzzaroo. Thank you, sir. I want to challenge Carl to the audience challenge, listener challenge thing, whatever you guys got going on. And creepiest man from Michigan. Okay. I think we did Michigan already, but I think we have.

But that's okay. It's a big state. It's a lot of creeps there. And then I got one more coming towards me. Okay. Yeah, I'm here for the listener challenge thing. My name is Curtis. I'm a creepo maniac on the Patreon.

And my challenge is the Vinnie. And my category is creepiest predator caught by. Chris Hanson. It's a limited number, but they're all great choices. So here's what I figured we should do, Carl, just for the shits and giggles of it. Yeah. Here's how we decide. Flip a coin?

How about I pick yours and you pick mine? Okay. That sounds good. So it was... Creepiest animator versus creepiest Michigan man. For me, yes. Yeah. So here's my question.

Yeah. Which one would you rather do? I don't know. I'm not giving you that. I'm not giving you that, buddy. All right. And then I have a predator caught by Chris Hansen or creepiest family man. Right.

Birthday boy, which one am I doing? Who am I challenging? I got to go with the Chris Hansen perp because the family man thing. I don't understand that all that well. Okay. Okay. So I'm going to be challenging. I think it was Curtis.

Okay. Curtis, I'll be getting in touch with you and we'll schedule a time to record this. And we're going to do them all together this time. You know what it would be nice is that I don't have an Aussie this time because we, The scheduling was difficult. By the way, he was very accommodating to me. Don't get me wrong. Sure.

It's just that Australia, I don't know this, other side of the world, pretty far away from where we are. Definitely different. Yeah. Definitely different. So yours are creepiest man from Michigan or creepiest animator. Yes. What do you think? Well, you immediately said you wanted to do Walt Disney.

I did. And I just picked the creepiest man from Michigan, Matt Latunsky. You did. So. You know what? We had a lot of people who listen to Michigan. Give them the love. Oh, come on.

Michigan, we're going to wish again. I went to expose old Walt, that anti-Semite. All right. You really going to do Walt Disney? Well, I would have, yeah, dude. And you're going to make it funny? Dude, I was just at Disney recently. And that fucking place, everything's just a goddamn gift shop now.

There's two or three rides. But everything else is just a gift shop in that place. Did you buy Disney? Disney dollars? No, you can pay with the, they'll take cash. They'll take credit cards. They'll take cash. They figure out a way to take your money.

I'm almost upset with my decision now. I might take this back. You can. I'll watch you if you want. All right. Creepiest animator. All right. Creepiest animator versus creepiest predator caught by Chris Hanson.

And by the way, I'm going to go deep. I'm going to talk about shit that happened long after Walt Disney was dead, acquiring Star Wars, acquiring the Simpsons, ruining all these great franchises. Fucking Marvel. Oh, we're going all in on Disney. Well, to that young man who picked Creepiest Animator, you're welcome for the win. It's coming your way.

All right. So those are our voicemails. I guess that would make it time for a Scum parade, Carl? I love it. All right. Scum parade. Take me on a raid of these fuck charades that these creeps have made. Scum parade.

Vinny and Carl Gonna tell you about some fuck shit Scum parade Like stories of a kid fucked by his mom or dad Soking up the blood of a cat Scum parade It's a scum parade

It's a scum parade That last line of that song gets me every time So unexpected and funny Um Vinnie As I mentioned you we were on the dick show doing some fun scum parade stories. We did.

And it seems like we could have an international scum parade for this show. We are going around the world a little bit. All right. Cool. Before we do, let's start off in St. Louis, Carl. Okay. At a KFC in St. Louis. Yeah.

Sounds heavenly. But unfortunately, one of the employees there had been hospitalized after a customer shot him because he was upset that the restaurant had run out of corn. This dude is fucking corny. I read this article, and I got a little upset because I'm like, over a vegetable. Yeah. You're going to shoot someone over a vegetable. They're not out of fucking extra crispy, motherfucker.

Right. Dude, I understand if they're out of thighs, if they're out of breasts, even mashed potatoes. You don't have any tenders. We're going. Yeah, even biscuits. Let's say you can't get a biscuit on the side. All right, yeah. You're getting shot if there's no biscuits.

Maybe I got to break my AK. for that kind of scenario. But corn, there's mac and cheese. Oh, I'm sorry. So we're out of corn. Would you like mac and cheese instead? Yes, actually, I would. Oh, thank you.

That's better, actually. The only way I would be upset is that they're like, oh, the only thing we have is green beans. Oh, yeah, that's a bullshit side. Do you think they even stocked that? That's just up on the menu just for show, right? Yeah, see, we have vegetables. We're here somewhere.

Never seen anyone actually ordered that. They're not looking in their pockets. They're not anywhere. This happened Monday evening in the city's West End. a gentleman at the drive-thru became upset and threatened employees when he was told the business was out of corn. The man had a handgun

when he drove up to the drive-thru window and a 25-year-old employee who, for some reason, went outside to talk to the driver. I'll calm him down. The guy with the gun out there? Let me handle this. Hey, sir, what seems to be the problem? It's fucking the manager

from Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Yes, exactly. Sir, what seems to be the problem today? judge nelson he comes walking back no not judd nelson it was the bet dennis dennis was the manager of the great american burger right yes okay i could talk to dennis nelson see if i get you a job where's anthony kumio and i fucking need i know so bad at these references i bad okay so this guy goes outside to talk to him walks back in going i've been shot yes surprise the aristocrats Dude, I've said it before.

I'll say it again. They wanted $15 an hour. Okay. Here's the money. The job just got tougher, though. You're going to get shot sometimes. Making the big bucks. That's what happens.

Listen, man, no money, more problems. That's exactly right, Vinny. Might be the name of this episode. Yeah. Mo money ball problems. You might want to just keep that 715 and have zero bullet holes. People get annoyed. The prices are going up on this shit.

I just, this guy just wanted his fucking corn, Carl. And you want to know the best part? It hasn't been caught yet. good he's free good glad you're happy don't they have cameras on the drive-thru and shit they know they must know his car in license plane i would hope so but they haven't caught him yeah nobody's been arrested yet st louis seems like a fun place doesn't it well nelly makes it sound fun i gotta say there's a lot of places that i i would like to visit st louis is not one of them you don't want to go see

that dumb fucking arch no i've seen the half of mcdonald's logo they're so fucking proud of I'm good. I don't know if I've been to St. No, I've been to St. Louis. I don't think I saw that bullshit. I don't think I have. All right. Let's go to Singapore, somewhere I've never been and have no plans on going to.

All right. A compliance officer with an investment management company was caught recording videos of men in the shower at an anytime fitness. Hmm. Now, Von Lin, Y. Howe, 36 was sentenced to 20 weeks in jail on Friday. He pled guilty in November to eight charges, included voyeurism and creating obscene fitness. films because when he's filming people over the thing, he wasn't blurring out their pubs. Oh, right. Yes. It's frowned upon. The judge called for a mandatory suitability report for it, but he was found unsuitable for the order. Citing the report, the prosecutor said,

Ling does not suffer from any diagnosable condition. He tried to say he was insane. So here's what happened. Yeah. January 2020, he and a colleague go to exercise in anytime fitness. About a half an hour, he goes into the shower in the men's changing room and notice that someone else was showering in a cubicle. Ling showered in the cubicle next to the person who was already in one. Yes. Which apparently there were a bunch of other open cubicles. Right.

It's like the bathroom. It's like walking into the urinals. You see one guy there. Right. You fucking give them some space. You need some buffer urinals. Yep. Well, if you're trying to get some awesome dick picks, you don't do the

buffer. You go to the shower right next store. And then you take your camera and you hold it up over the stall. I believe they call it the opi. The old opi. He pulled the old opster on that one. Oh, no, no care if I just put my camera up over the wall here. I forgot. That's what he did. Yep. And now he's crazy talking to the sunset. Cheers, sunset. You're my friend, right sunset? You know what? We're so stupid at sunrise. It's a sunset and somebody's going to yell at me. It's still funny, though. So this guy sees this is going on. He looks up and he sees the phone over the thing. And so he

goes and knocks on the cubicle door. And he was like, no one home. There's nobody in here. Right. He refused to answer the door to answer it to talk to him. So he just stayed in there. And they went and got a manager for the gym and she comes back in and knocks on the door. And finally he opens it. And he's like, all right.

Here's my phone. The cops end up showing up looking through it. They found all of these videos of other men years worth of videos of men in the showers. By the way, I think he could have gotten away with this. This is what I would have done. Smash your phone into a billion pieces. Nope. Because it's all about if the guy wants to press charges or not.

I'd just be like, dude, the reason why I was video taping that? You got a fucking hog on you, bro. Holy shit. I'm so jealous of your cock. I was showing my girlfriend, she was blown away by it. We just can't get enough of the size of your dick. It's incredible. here's the thing but my penis so tidy you could you could you could bust me right now and you know

I'd understand why you did yeah but here's the deal my super hot girlfriend with giant tits yeah is looking for a guy she wants to fuck and I was scouting yeah right exactly she needs someone to titty fucker and I need you have to have a certain size in order to pull this off so you know I was gonna take it to her it was basically an application process we both go to the same gym I would see what I mean really do you see how easy this is to get out of these things yeah man You are quite the fucking criminal genius. If you know anyone who wants someone to drop the charges against them, you tell them to call me. Never have I met someone who so eloquently knows how to talk his way out of filming their piece, someone else's penis.

You've got Carl Hamburger. Yep. This is the kind of prep that I put into this show, Betty. Here's what his argument, what he did say his excuse was. Yeah. I'm so ugly. And these guys are so handsome. I just wanted to see what a not ugly person looked like.

See, I wish I had known about this sooner because I think. I could have made this guy feel much better about himself. If I could have sent him some of my nudes, he'd be like, oh, okay, I'm not that bad. You know, it's one of those things where doesn't he realize that everybody likes to film the ugly? That's the fun part. People like, when you see the ugly, you like to film them, because it's like, hey, get a load of this. Yeah, no, that's hilarious.

No, I think this is a gay man, Vinny, if I had a guess, who's probably beating off to these videos. Good point. Even though it's never mentioned in the article, that's even a possibility. I guarantee that's what's going on here. Otherwise, it doesn't make any fucking sense. Correct. Because the guy's actually like he's beating himself up over.

It's just like, I just hate myself so much. I just want to watch these videos and hate myself even more. Really? Okay. That's dumb. That's stupid. Enjoy your trutty weeks of jail. You get lots of looks of men in the shower.

Oh, yeah, lots of showering going on, buddy. Can I bring my phone? No. No. But here's a Polaroid. And that's why it's a jail. Here's a disposable code hack. Go to town.

No, they don't have that over there. They get a Fuji. Oh, yeah. Good point. now uh carl yes let's go over to nepal okay chinese national feng zhang yang 37 was arrested december 4th on suspicion of killing gan sojang 29 an injuring 32 year old lee chuzon oh it's not fair the violent knife attack replaced on a sunday afternoon at the crowded indra chalk market at the capital of catmandu shocking video shows gan who's known online as fatty goes to africa

broadcasting himself live walking and laughing with a pair of friends when the scene is suddenly interrupted by a series of distressing high-pitched screams followed by wild shaking before the scream goes black. Another clip shows a visibly dazed gan sitting in the middle of the street covered in blood while another person believed to be fang can be heard swearing at him in Chinese. First off, Fanny Goes to Africa would be a great movie title

if we ever made a movie about you going to Africa. I think that would do really well. I can see the cover. It's me standing next to an elephant. Just like, you guys are like, who wore it better to you next to an elephant? Anyway, that's hurtful. Fannie goes to Africa. Yeah.

Is a, uh, a vlogger. Yeah. Right? He's a video vlogger. Yeah. Food, uh, reviewer, basically. Yeah, he's very popular. A lot of viewers.

So, uh, basically he was stabbed to death. on the street quarter, probably a rival vlogger. Yeah. And I was reading this thinking, wow, this might be what happens on February 3rd if Chad Zumach shows up the dabble con. I could very much see this going down in a similar way. Wouldn't it be fucking wild if you just get stabbed to death? And it's literally at a Stuttering John thing.

And Stuttering John isn't the one who stabs you to death. Right. Wouldn't that be ironic? We never would have guessed. Well, actually, we did guess a lot of people hate this guy. It actually wasn't surprising at all, it turns out. man my question to you baby devil con is going to be lit my question to you is why is it wATP live dot com why's ever not to be so jelly all the time you got to stop being so jelly

this guy's just how jelly it's not a good look it's not a good look and now he's in prison in Nepal for murdering fat he goes to africa yeah so faddy goes africa died his buddy is in critical condition and they're just trying to eat some food and have a little fun with it being a fatty in africa would probably suck I guarantee chairs are not built for Oh, that's why you're thinking that? I'm thinking people are looking at you like, dude, what the fuck? Couldn't have saved some of that?

My family is starving. And you're just going to eat the entire, okay. Yeah, I am. Not your food, though. I don't know. Yeah, I brought my own. I brought a lunchable. Now, folks, let's close out on a Christmas story, shall we?

I swear we've covered this story. I swear we did it last month. I don't think we did. Okay. Because this just happened. Well, no, it didn't just happen. Anyway, read it, read it, read it. If I covered this, I must have some type of brain aneurysm

where I do not recall. Or maybe I talked about another show or something because, God, I remember this very well. A 10-year-old Wisconsin boy, allegedly shot and killed his mother last night, appeared in court for the first time on Monday. Quiana Manson... Yes, he appeared in court for the first time. That's why this is an updated article. Anyway, keep going.

Quiana Manson is being charged as an adult on a homicide case. reports indicated that the boy shot his mother, Quiana man, 44 in the face. Yeah. For not purchasing him a virtual reality headset and for waking him up early. See, this is why you have to lie to your kids about Santa Claus. Get them pissed off as someone else for not getting the gifts that you wanted, right? Dad is the best point.

You didn't get it. Santa, that son of a bitch. Santa, you pizza, you rat bastard Santa. I don't know if my car will make it, but I'll drive you to the North Pole right now. We'll take care of business. Oh, boy, we're going to send him a letter. We're going to send him a letter. The boy allegedly went on Amazon.com after he murdered his mother and ordered the item that he wanted an Oculus virtual reality headset.

I think you could have done that without murdering his mother, but okay. Well, he did that the morning after he murdered. That same morning, he reportedly attacked his seven-year-old cousin, leading his aunt to take him over to his grandmother's house. apparently, I don't think anybody knew that he murdered the mom. No. So he goes to the grandmother's house and they called child welfare workers there. And the boy told his grandmother, I'm really sorry for what happened. I'm sorry for killing my mom before asking if his Amazon package had arrived yet.

That's hilarious. Merry Christmas, kids. Do you shot your mom? Oh, yeah, yeah. Sorry about that. That's a bad day. Anyway, anything come in the mail for me today? It's so bad.

Yeah. What's that fucking Sabre game, Beat Saber? Yeah, right. You're going to fucking shoot you from the faceover, Beat Saber? Dude, that's a fun game. I know it seems like exercise to you. That's a fun game, buddy. Dude, I have a fucking Oculus, and I've never turned it on.

You've never tried Beat Saber. It's a fun game. I have it on. I have the thing. I've never turned it on. I have an Oculus as well. And they keep showing ads for that football game. Yeah.

Where the kids like, oh, I want to be the cowboy. quarterback. And I see that. I'm like, oh, I want to play that game. But then I realized they never showed the gameplay in that commercial. It's got to suck. Have you tried it? No, I have no idea. But I was just, I was just realizing, I'm like, wait a second. Why would they show what it looks like just even for a moment? If the game was really realistic, it would be awesome. It would suck for you if it was really realistic. Because then you'd be like, hey, I want to be the quarterback. Like, no way, club foot. It'd send you home. You think, are you think that's what happened? To the stands. Now, uh, apparently this young man has had some rage

issues for a while. He had, uh, at one point when he was four years old, he had grabbed his cousin's puppy and swung it in the air until it howled an agony. Hmm. And, uh, oh, I'm sorry, the mom had gotten a puppy for him. Yeah. And they had to take the puppy away. Yeah. And you'll find in another house. He wasn't playing well with that pup. Yeah. Apparently, he also filled a balloon. with a flammable liquid and set it on fire inside the house. That's funny. Causing a bunch of damage. That's a pretty good prank. And he told his mother

that he hears five imaginary people talking to him. Two sisters, an older man, an older woman, and a second man who he called mean. Oh. So this kid is schizophrenic. Yeah. Which might be a good reason not to give him an Oculus. Well, she wasn't going to.

Yeah. If you remember right. Nautilus, asshole. Noddy list. Remember the balloon? So this is what I think we should do, Biddy, because this kid, obviously, it's not going to get better, right? Right. This kid's got some fucking problems right now.

I wish we had a new Australia. I wish there was a new place that we could just send people to. And just like, we could turn into a reality show or something. How about we send them all to the Walmart on Dale Mayberry? It's Walmart and Del Mayberry.

Perfect. They can go be employees there. Perfect. According to Chad Zumach, they'll fit right in. Isn't that hilarious? It's so hilarious. So wouldn't that be fun though? Maybe it's Hunger Games.

Maybe it's already been thought of. But wouldn't it be great to just take like these people who really have all these fucking problems and just put them somewhere where they can't escape? Uh-huh. The Cuba might be a good place. I don't know. Dump them all in Cuba. What's Epstein's Island doing these days?

What are people doing with that real estate? Dump them all there. Put cameras up. We can watch a 24-7 stream sponsored by Bounty. It'd be a real pirate island. A pirate island. We got to stop talking right now. Someone's going to steal this idea.

Because then you won't feel bad if they, like, kill each other and stuff. Dude, it's just like fucking locked up. It's Lord of the Flies. Yes, right. And no one's going to feel bad. They're like, hey, that 10-year-old who shot his mom in the face, yeah, he just got killed. Like, great. We sent him to New Australia.

Yeah, New Australia. New Australia. I mean, fucking, does anyone live in New Zealand? New Zealand? I don't think so. Can we just send them there? I know Steve left. I don't know. Either way, Carl, here's to a new Australia. I'm with you on that one. New Australia. That's a pretty fucking dynamite idea, I have to say. Well, folks, Carl, you are a genius. You can talk your way out and taking pictures of men in

locker rooms. You could solve all of our overcrowding problems of the pedal system. You are a wonder. Thank you, buddy. Thank God you were born, what, 53 years ago today? Something like that. Sure. Carl, happy birthday. You know what? I am going to lie about my age on the other side of things. That's what John has always done wrong because he looks terrible. He should be saying he's 70 people. Like, oh, okay. I'm going to start to say it.

I'm in my 60s. Carl, you look amazing. Thank you, buddy. I know. Holy shit, you really would turn the tables. Dude, I chalk it up to clean living. Yeah. I'm a health nut.

Chalk it up to clean living. I'm a healthy diet. All right. Let's celebrate not my birthday. We get the shit about that. Let's celebrate the. the very important holiday that is Super Chat Monday. All right.

Let's see what we got. We got one from D-Ban, $2. Thank you very much. VPN might work. Two-facedline bastard. How do I send Canadian money, question mark, $1.99? We'll take U.S. or Canadian. We got that one from our great mincella.

Two-Face-line bastard also said, happy birthday, $199. Cam Critical Happy half birthday Vinnie Thank you very much for remembering Cam 199 That's right It is your half birthday It certainly is

Turbo Neil Brean says A happy birthday to Carl for $10 Thank you Thank you Turbo And yeah that the VPN might work I think was an answer To how do I send Canadian money I don't think that VPNs convert dollars

But maybe they do Give it a shot Why not One more time to Tricky Thank you for the 4999 And then to our pound mint salad but thank you for the 50, the cool fitty from Mint. Yes, thank you, Mint, and the rest of the gang over there.

Riley and those guys. Also, Daniel Christensen is not giving me money, but wishing me happy birthday and thanking me for the great content. Thank you, Daniel. Thanks for checking out the show live with us. We really do have the best fans at the creep-off. We do. I don't know why.

W-A-T-P fans are very fickle compared to the creep-off fans. Is that true? I think so. I've been reading the RECP-O-F fans. Reddit since we had our conversation yesterday. Yeah. And a lot of WATP fans talk shit about this show, and I'm not sure why.

Like, I get really true crimes not for you or the atrocities are not for you, but Jesus Christ, we do it in the most fun, different way than anybody else. Oh, people were talking shit about this show? Yeah, they were like, I didn't get into that fucking show because they're fucking... Hold on. All right. You're thinking about this all the wrong way. Okay. These are fans

of WATP that talk mad shit about WATP. Yeah. So you think they're going to like this show I didn't even like the show that they claim to like. So, yeah, don't feel bad, buddy. You're not going to win that one. No, I don't even give a shit. I was just like, I couldn't believe that I was reading it.

That people were like, our real creepoff fans were showed up and being like, actually, the creepoff is way better than WATP. It's shorter for one. All right. I know you wrote that. All right. People are saying great about how great the show was. And I was like, I wanted to make sure I sent a special thank you out to those people who

defended our show on Reddit. Fucking sock accounts. Get out of here. You're the real true blue fans of the show. Excelsior. True believers. And with that, I wish you a very Merry Christmas. We'll be back next week with The Creep of the Year. Until then, it's nice to be important.

It's more important to be nice. Gagia. What is this garbage? How do they have a podcast? This is bullshit. One nature, we need a pull of an arm, and each day, all the Christmas counter.

And there comes in a chair, a season on good win. And yet one of the star must feel vested, Gritches out there just get resting, and spoilt it all for everyone. Though it's too much to expect you to be nice, you'll find that life is easier with this advice. Try not to be a cut, it's Christmas.

Try not to be a cut, it's Christmas. Take a tip from Santa's home The rest of us are doing our best to be jolly So don't go looking like you swallowed a bunch of holly Don't shout at carol singers and tell don't to stop Don't buy your presents from the Oxfran shop A fuck to say me, Terry Have another sherry

Try not to be a cut Try not to be a cut I'm going to bring it. I'm slaying up to Lapland. Try not to be your con. C-U-N-T-C-U-N-T-C-D-C-C-T-C-C-T-C-C-H-H-H-A-C-H-H-H-H-H-H-H-G.