The Creep Off - Episode 212: Human Tacos: Corn or Flour?

Episode Date: May 6, 2024

In today's episode Karl & Vinnie celebrate Cinco de mayo by nominating the creepiest Mexican: In our cop cam segment we watch a real dork bore a cop to death: In the Scum Parade, we meet a bad mom who turns out to be worse date, a real old lady Lothario and a man who should have dug a little deeperThe score is currently Vinnie 4 - Karl 2, visit thecreepoff.com to vote and decide this week’s winnerGet your tickets to Hackamania in Las Vegas at Hackamania.com use promo code “Creep” and save 20%Check out the Scum Parade stories: Online flirting ends in attempted murder charge for Florida woman (scrippsnews.com)Flight attendant indicted in attempt to record teen girl in airplane bathroom | AP NewsSuspect arrested in sexual assault on 81-year-old woman with dementia in Pacoima; bail set at $2.1 million - ABC7 Los AngelesChae Kyong An sentenced for frying to murder wife (lawandcrime.com)Want to support the show? Find us on Patreon, Supercast & Backed.by to get exclusive merch an extra bonus episode every week! Don’t forget you can leave us a voicemail at 585-371-8108You can follow our Results girl Danni on Instagram @Danni_Desolation

One thing I learned from that reality show this week is your mic on. Check your mic. Check my mic. Check one, too. All right. Carl, we're going to Vegas. Yes, we are, sir. We're going to be there on June 1st. Were they live the creepoff? We just call it a live creep off. Yeah, I guess. I mean, it's like the, the creep off. The creep off live? Yeah, I suppose I like to call it The Live Creepov Well, that's pretty wonderful I haven't been to Las Vegas In many years It's the last time I killed a man in an alley

Guess who created a Patreon over the weekend Yes, it's the reality show They're monetizing now What do you get if you join the Patreon Because it doesn't matter, take my money Dude, I was watching this morning And Helga says, you know, you can sign it for the Patreon and he's also selling some of his art,

digital art for five bucks a piece. It's like, Helga, we don't care about your art. What are you talking about? I'd rather buy an NFT. Yes. It's worth more than your stupid digital art. Dork.

All right. Carl, back to Hackamadia. Brian Johnson's going to be there. Yes, he is. My hell yeah, is going to be our official results girl that night. Nice. So she's going to be joining us. And not only that, Carl,

the category has been decided upon for what our creeps are going to have to be. Okay, what is it? That way you have plenty of time to work on it. Great. Creepiest Las Vagan. Simple. Vegas creep from Vegas. We might even be able to pull somebody off the street. Who knows? I was going to say, they have to be from Vegas or maybe they did something creepy

in Vegas? Remember that guy who I went to high school with? Who murdered his uncle and burned him in his yard? Yeah, how's he doing? He went to Vegas. Back when he was still married to this other woman I went to high school with. He went to Vegas and got arrested and spent two weeks in jail there, which is hard to do.

Two weeks in jail in Vegas? Yeah, I mean, they pretty much let you get away with a lot there. That's true. That's true. But they don't let you murder your godfather. That's true, too. That is illegal in Vegas. I know a lot about the law now.

Carl? Yes. Hackamania, doctor. promo code creep 20% off tickets be there all right let's uh do a show or something you're listening to the carl network warning listening to the creep off might leave you trigger this episode may contain murder rape laughing at murder and rape abelism many dixtra serial keaters smile talking fat shaming child abuse drug abuse pizza abuse victim blaming and the state of flor I'm going to give the people what they want, sensation, horror, shock.

I'm going to deliver the goods, because I'm alive, and I'm not backing down. Cuckoo, cuckoo. Hambergin, I ain't going to have it. Disgusting, vomit-inducing thing. Ola Creepos, welcome to another edition of your favorite true-cry podcast, the show about creeps by creeps for your creeps. My name is Vinny, and all I have to say today is Excelsior. True Believers. Been a while since I hit that drop, didn't forget about you.

joining me today, as always, it is hot. Cacca, Carl! What is happening, Vinnie Paulino? Good to see you, my friend. Big show today, buddy. Big show today. Yes. We did a pivot.

Well, you and I discussed this after the bonus show. Now, we did a bonus show on Friday with the great Royce from Revenge of the Sis. And producer Chris was here. And we watched an amazing episode of Thunder in Paradise. I'm just going to put it to you this way. Hoke Hogan versus Truckosaurus. Oh. with the Queen of England.

And it's crazy. Yes, it's even crazier than that. It is one of the dumbest things I've ever seen in my life, and I loved it. So after we're urging, we're walking out, and we said, what's the category Monday? And I said, well, producer Chris is standing right here. Why don't we do creepiest producer? And you said, great, let's do that. And then you texted me this morning, and you said, this is really hard.

We got a bunch of kid diddlers and shit like that, but it's not that exciting. You know? there was one I found that was pretty interesting and I'm going to save for another day because it would have won me this round. Here we go. Here we go. But Carl decided to pivot. So since yesterday was...

Well, you were the one who said, let's pivot. And I said, no, I said there were plenty of choices. I just did... I also said, I didn't want to step on your toes if you had picked somebody. So I'd asked you if you would pick somebody else because I picked someone and it turns out she was somebody that was used before.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I thought. You're changing this whole conversation now. Do I want me to read it? Do I want to read it? It doesn't matter. Are you illiterate? Maybe.

The point is this, Vinnie, instead of doing a producer, which nobody even knew we were going to do that, we didn't have to talk about this at all. But yesterday was Cinco de Mayo. I hope you had a nice Cinco de Mayo, Vinay. I did. It's my dog's birthday. Oh, beautiful. Very good.

We celebrate Cinco de Sammy at my house. Oh, wow. How fun. Party hats and L.S. Because it was Cinco de Mayo yesterday, I figured, why not present the creepiest Mexican? I think we've done this category before. But that's okay. We can find other creeps in Mexico, I bet.

There are. I bet there's more. the two. Safe bet. Yeah, I would think so. Well, before we get into this week's competition, we need to go back and look at last week's competition. We did Creepiest Gang in here to give us the results is our lovely brand new.

Fresh out of the oven, it's Danny, everybody. Hi, Danny. Hey, Danny. Hi, guys. Welcome back to the show. Thank you. Now, Danny, last week you were on, and I was excited to see you. I'm congratulating.

you for your victory and then you went and told us that viny had won and i've been kind of upset about that ever since it's been a bad week i'm hoping i think that you did a wonderful job she didn't it was terrible it was terrible i'm hoping that she does better this time you're my favorite results girl so far nothing personal jess god rest her soul um but you know daddy you started off on the right foot do you want to uh tell us the results from last week's episode of course of course so the current scores three to two

with Vinnie in the lead the last week's category was the creepiest gang Carl brought the Bohemia Grove which I personally was super excited for thank you your's was awesome too Vinny brought the Chicago Ripper crew

the winner with 57% of the vote is Mr. Vinnie Paulino oh please he's going to make a pass Should we get Redhead and Meg to be the results girl? I don't know if this is working out. I don't think this is working out right now.

Carl, Carl, do you know what this means? What does this mean? One more for the good guys. It's game point, you son, bitch. Oh, no. It's game point for me. What's going on right now?

Hard work, perseverance, dedication to the art. That's how it happens, Carl. that's how you get dropped when you were up to nothing. I really thought the Bohemian Grove was going to put me over the top last week. I was incorrect. Damn. Danny, I got a surprise for you while you're here. Oh, yay. The listeners love you so far.

And you have been inspired. You inspired one of them to create Danny intro music. You have a jingle. Nice. Oh, no way. That's amazing. From Mr. Magenta. He sent this in yesterday.

So, Danny, get ready for your jingle. Tell me if you like it. Because if you don't, we'll throw it on the fire. Okay. Danny, Danny, read and results, oh, dandy. Please won't you post that fanny all over the Patreon. Danny, Danny, that body's so uncanny. Boy, smooth like lamb and shandy.

Oh, yeah, she's my creep girl. I fucking love it. Thank you, Mr. Magenta. It has a good message. It makes a lot of good points. Mr. Magenta sees crushing it. That's awesome. So also, so you like it.

That's going to be your, we'll use it from now on. I love it. Thank you. Yeah, that's amazing. And hopefully there'll be a sequel to that song at some point. Thank you. That's so cute. Now also, if you go to our Reddit page, they started a brand new

questions for Danny for the month of May. So if you visit Reddit, you could submit your questions to Danny. And I went on there, and there was a couple. Do you mind if I ask you real quick? Yeah, of course. Wapio actually wanted to give you a really great point. Wapio says, Dear Danny, if you ever get kicked off the show,

simply post a video of you throwing your child onto your Instagram. Boom, right back in. Oh, man. Was that a question? No, that one wasn't a question. I'll do my best. This one came in from Dr. Ted, penis astronaut, one of my favorite Redditors.

Hi, Danny. Do you know what Carl did with Jess's body? Her springer parents finally realized that she hasn't been coming to dinner. Don't answer that, Danny. I know you know things. Let's not even a pending situation. All right.

I don't want to be next. Make sure you submit your questions. on that on the creep off Reddit page. So, yes, we need to learn more about Danny, our new results girl. Yeah, we need to find out everything about you, Danny. We're going to learn about you. Are your parents swingers or were they swingers ever? I don't think so.

I don't think so. Okay, so we need to get to the bottom of that. All right, so there's lots of things to learn about Danny. All right. Definitely parents aren't as cool as Jess. We learn that. We don't know about that. We don't know about that.

You could follow Danny. at Danny Desolation on Instagram. And thank you for doing a wonderful job reading the results. Thank you. All right. Thank you, guys. Thanks, Danny. Bye.

Bye. All right. I'm willing to make up with her if she gets it right next week. Oh, I hope she does get it right next week. That means your ass is going to be spit it. No, it does not. No one does not. It's like pointed to the WrestleMania sign.

That's your fucking future. Creepiest Mexican. Let's go, buddy. I'm ready for the competition. I brought it this week. Of course, you get to go first. Well, Carl, since I had roughly two and a half hours to put together a presentation, I really do it. Maybe we should do this more often where you can't fucking write a giant essay and read it to us.

I don't write giant essays. Yes, you do. This one is a medium-sized essay that I was able to put together in under two hours. Okay. My creep today's name is Andre Mendoza. Excuse me. Coffee, baby. He is known these days as the monster of Azzapan, Mexico, part of Mexico City.

And we're going to catch up to him when he is eventually apprehended around 72 years old. Records on this guy, pretty spotty, Carl. No evidence of a wife or kids. The only thing we know about him is that he worked a steady job as a butcher in a slaughterhouse. Okay. That's got to do wonders for your psyche, right? I would imagine. All day long, you're just chopping up animals and walking out to Mexico.

probably is not a great day, I would imagine. So when he retired, he got into local politics and ended up being his area's representative to the board of participants, whatever the fuck that means. Sure. Arriba, Arriba, congratulations you want. So he's well-known fixture in the neighborhood. He's always trying to help people. He's kind of beloved.

But he's also a little sketchy because how do I describe this? he really likes pussy really likes younger pussy doesn't mind pain for it hangs out at the bars in the afternoons of the evenings and he's always be you know befriending and he's not women now we're talking about stuttering John he's running for office he hangs out of bars all day he loves young pussy

I thought we were doing the creepiest Mexican not Puerto Rican okay it's going on I'm just going to sum it up Stuttering John the guy's basically Stuttering John except 702 God damn it uh stop it up he's a creepy old barfly who is into politics do the math kids that leads us to a lovely mother of two 34 years old owner of a small cell phone shop her name is rena amador now is does the shop sell small cell phones or is it a small shop it's a small shop okay that the cell phones are normal size

happens to have cell phones there for sale i just realized i tried to do a tongue twister Does it sell cell phones when it sells? Yeah. Fuck me. You might have done it if your teeth hadn't have gotten in the way. No shit. Well, this one's going this way. This one's going that way.

The guy's in the middle. Like, what do you want for me? My tongues are they going, what do you want for me? Oh, you motherfucker. By the way, you piece is a shit. You and Chris. What do we do? On WATP.

My joke, my joke, stairs, easy for you to climb. Yes. Somebody's like, this is the greatest joke ever. And they go, it was Chris's joke. And Chris goes, no, that wasn't my joke. And Carl goes, no, I'm sure it wasn't your joke. Because there's nobody else there who could ever make a funny joke. Nobody else could have ever made the good joke.

All right. All right. The voicemailer corrected us. We corrected the record. That is really funny. I'm sorry. I had to get out that. That's the name of my autobiography.

Stair is easy for you to climb. Yeah. I like somebody made it simpler. I really liked it. Easy for you to walk. Sure. Carly Amberger, sorry. Starris is funnier.

Agreed. My version was funnier. So either way, this is a woman. She's 34. She's married to a guy named Bruno Angel Portillo. No. Who is a... You know what to fuck with a chick who's married to Bruno?

Sounds like a bad idea. Especially if Bruno is the police chief. Okay. And that current municipality. So he's volunteering and helping her out. He's a beloved member of the community. He helps her out. and long story short

Thank God One day he's going to help her go pick up some new products into the city This was a normal thing He would go with her and help Bruno knew about it

He didn't give a shit He's a 72 year old guy He's just gonna go fucking help out And she gives him a little extra cash She's an old dude, whatever So she doesn't come home that night Bruno's freaked out Sure

Bruno starts trying to figure out, trace her steps. And the first person he goes to is obviously the last person he knew she was with, Mendoza, Andre. Yeah. He goes, she left. I don't know, man. I saw her. I helped her.

I got her with the phone. She's gone. He's complete stonewall. So Bruno having the resources that he has goes and starts tracking her cell phone. He starts pinging it and he starts looking at cameras in the area, the day of. he sees her go towards the area of her his house never sees her leave her cell phone is still pinging to the area of his house got so he starts thinking according to him in later interviews did my wife leave me for this 72 year old loser very possible very possible he's fucking mad yeah

so the next day he goes down there and he's pretty upset so he wants to talk to this guy again he shows up knocks on the door Andre won't let him in he basically breaks the door down goes inside and starts calling her cell phone he hears the ringing coming from the bedroom goes into the bedroom but he's hearing the rigging tried to figure out where it's coming from

floorboards pulls up the floorboards this guy had a makeshift dungeon basement that he dug out of dirt sweet under his house nice so Mendoza goes down or not Mendoza Bruno goes down there and Mendoza

high tails it out of there the second he figures out this guy found this hole when he goes down there he finds his wife right she's on a table well

he finds his wife's torso right got a table sure and she's been scalped her face has been peeled off okay her legs over there

her arms over here everything's all it's a big roomy dog out wow it's well it was big enough for her and a few others we'll get there at a second but i have the audio because the guy was calling the cell phone from the voicemail like the recording of him finding the body of his wife okay and uh it is not pretty here you go mendoza sounds pissed he wasn't too rightful so he was not too happy yeah so either way they

apprehend, Andre not too far away. Obviously, this guy is one of the police department. Everybody was jumping outboard to come catch this motherfucker. By the time they're done digging out the pit that was underneath his house, it took over a month. They found

4,600 bones of people which they presumed when all was said and done to 17 women, a child and a man. How many bones that math doesn't check out? 4,600, they said. 600, there's about 200 bones in a body.

Huh. Well, I had to translate that from Spanish, so. Okay. Okay. So it was like three dogs and a cat probably? Okay, got it. Yeah, yeah. Either way, they found the bodies of 17 women, a child, and a man, so 19 other people

apart from this guy's wife. So that's 20. Wow. Now, he confessed that with the exception of Raina, he met all of his victims in bars, places where they worked and where he visited. You know, there's always that creep at the bar, the old guy who sits there by himself, You're like, that guy's a creep. But you don't realize there's actually dead people in his basement.

You should from the stink lines, though. You should, yeah. This guy had to have stink lines, too. Well, in Mexico, there's a lot of stink lines. It's very warm there. As they're digging through this place, basically what they, he would bring these women back to his house and he would hit on them. And if they went for it, great. If they didn't, you end up in the fucking basement.

Okay. He had a bit of an anger problem. He didn't like to be rejected. Okay. They found IDs, clothing, shoes, makeup, and bags of several women. He also kept their skinned faces and their scalps. See, I think taking the skin off of face doesn't really do anything. It's the bone structure beneath the cartilage that makes it the face, right?

Well, I thought that too. Yeah. And they asked him about this during his court hearing. He said, all I want to do is tell the truth. I removed the skin from their faces because they were very pretty. Sure. Makes sense. and then he said by the way to Bruno

who was in the room when this happened he goes your honor what has been done is done the husband was there he saw it already I mean it's over with what do you want me to tell you that's like a quote

what's done is done look we can talk about all this shit that I did that were blue in the face it's not going to change anything I chopped her face off because she was pretty what else you want to know are we done here can I go now

this is and he Dude, that wasn't all that they found. I would imagine, though, he was very good at dismembering these bodies, right? Probably very precise, all that experience in the butcher shop all those years. This motherfucker didn't think twice. Muscle memory. Yep, nice.

You know how to debone a prostitute? It's simple. Or how about a police chief's wife? Yeah. I mean, that's pretty balzy. He knows, he must have thought that he was so comfortable in his position as like this chief of the volunteer participation thing that nobody would have ever suspected him. but he's also 72 and has no idea how cell phones work

right but also Vinny I'm just throwing it out there he might have had some mental deficiencies he might have been crazy it's possible hold on a second let me show you a picture of him you tell me he's nuts do you think this that

whoa he's docks in his email how is it still doing that what was that voicemails how did that happen I don't know damn it oh that's going to be analyzed for months to come I have a feeling.

Yeah, it's a real problem. Oh, no. See, these guys do all the same shit that they like to goof on me for. Nope, just me. I'm the only one who does that. Oh, God. All right, this week at WTP, I'm reviewing the creep off. You should.

Hosted by Moonhead. And there goes Moonhead. Doc said everybody. All right. Troy Smith, emergency episode. Oh, this is what he looks like? Yeah. What a charming old man.

That's it after they arrested him. What's wrong with his face? I'm guessing a couple beatings from the cops. Ah, that would make sense, yes. I guess they probably didn't like him very much. I would imagine. And then, hold on, I'm going to show you one more thing. This is one of the other things they found Carl in the basement.

Notebooks, meticulous notes. Okay. About with the names of 29 different women. And that weird and fun statistics. like that. Oh man, I wish I could let you see this a little bit better. What does it say? I mean, I don't really speak Spanish. Well, it's hard to read, but I'm going to read you the translation of it. Mm-hmm. Okay. You know what? Just, I'm going to go fuck myself. It's probably easier. If you're really having some issues here, I really threw you up.

I changed the category this morning, didn't I? My mouse is fucked up. Oh, is that what's going on? Yeah, man. Sorry. It's like stuck or something. I must have, I got to stop fucking the mouse before the show it really is sticking so it's sad carl this gives us a cliff note here can we move on what's going to December 17th 1994 at 5 in the morning blank passed into another life age 28 years old lived in coatupac head weighed 4.5 kilograms liver and heart each 4 kilograms legs 2.5 kilograms each rib and right arm 14 kilograms rib and left arm weight weight 16 kilograms, bust one kilo and a half each.

He was eating and cooking with the meat as well. Ah, I was wondering why he's weighing everything. Yes, yes. He was keeping records of all of it so he knew how much he had because after all, he was a butcher and this is what he was used to doing.

He was taking notes after slaughtering something. Okay. So what was he doing with the meat from these people? Cooking, tacos, whatever. Cooking for himself? Probably. You don't know. others probably everybody else in the neighborhood when he had these big parties he don't even know what's going on he probably fed that to people their kids together maybe maybe he probably he probably he might have even raped animals I don't know oh boy this is this presentation's falling

apart right now it's not falling apart this is completely falling apart he pled guilty and he confessed to eating them and using the meat uh huh to cook with and then he would bury the rest of whatever the fuck was left down there that's why there was all skeletons and shit so folks without any hesitation I can tell you that my man, Andre Mendoza, is the biggest creep from Mexico. When you visit the creepoff.com this week, you can vote for Vinny.

All right. Or you can vote for Carl because I'm presenting to you, Jose Luis Calva. Now, Calva's childhood was traumatic. His father died when he was two, and his mother used to bring men home and force Jose to call them Poppy.

Yikes. This is your new poppy now. And she had a lot of different... I have your puppy now. You know, a lot of different guys coming and going. Then, when you were your new puppy now, Then when he turned seven, he was raped by a 16-year-old friend of his older brother. At the age of 12, he was kicked out of his home by his mother.

So he had like 11 relatively good years? Yeah, he was doing okay for like six and a half. Okay. So he met the woman he would eventually marry and have children with. And in 1996, he worked as a clown alongside his brother-in-law who was a magician. Oh, God. So his wife's brother is a magician. He's like, I'll be part of the act.

I'll dress up as a clown. Yeah, you know what he would tell people? What's that? My brother loves a real cloud, huh? Uh, yeah? Come on. Go on. So they divorced, and she took the family and moved to the United States.

Got the fuck out of Mexico City. Probably a good idea for her, because he's taken into a very deep depression. He turned to alcohol and drugs. He would intentionally date women who worked in pharmacies to gain access to Kalanzapan. Yeah, well, listen, everybody has a type. I'm with you, man. Some guys like blots, some like big tits, other guys like pharmacists. No effects has a song called Pharmacist's daughter about that very topic.

In 2004, he became a murderer. His then girlfriend was found dismembered with her body parts stuffed in cardboard boxes. In 2007, the dismembered body of a prostitute was found stuffed in a suitcase shortly before his then-girlfriend went missing. Play the video. This is the news report. of what they found. Inside an apartment in this building, something out of a horror novel, police find a woman's torso in the closet, a leg in the refrigerator, and bones in a cereal box. Authorities arrested Jose Luis Calva, an aspiring writer and poet,

with the draft of a novel titled Cannibalistic Instincts. The body belongs to Calva's girlfriend, her family reported the 30-year-old pharmacy clerk missing. Police came to Calva's apartment after neighbors reported a terrible smell. and works at a pizzeria nearby. He says Calva didn't look like a violent person. He looked like a normal person. The police spokesman says Calva told them he'd boiled some of his girlfriend's flesh

but had not eaten it. Calvah tried to avoid arrest by running from police. He was struck by a car and hospitalized. And he's being investigated in the killings of two other women, a prostitute and an ex-girlfriend, also a pharmacy worker whose dismembered body was found three years ago. John Belmont the Associated Press

So when they got into his apartment They found a frying pan That was cooking human flesh With some lemon seasoning on it He thought that was a good way to season people As you heard, human bones And a box of cereal That's not Captain Crunch

They also found her calf in the refrigerator So, aside from that, an unfinished book titled Cannibal Instincts or 12 Days, I'm sorry, Cannibal Instincts for 12 days and a picture of Anthony Hopkins portraying Hannibal Lecter was up on the wall. So this guy was really into being a cannibal, he's having a lot of fun with it. A former girlfriend reported that he was obsessed with bestiality porn, witchcraft, and the saddest novel 120 days. of Sodom. His lawyer claimed he killed the women because he was high on cocaine. Who hasn't done coke and then wanted to dismember women?

Every one of them, I see. Every one of them. No, nobody, Carl. Nobody wants to do that. On the early morning of December 11th, 2007, Calva, who apparently had committed suicide between 6 a.m. and 6.30 a.m. was found hanging by his belt from the roof of his holding cell, although no note was found and speculated that maybe the other inmates decided to put this guy.

down because he was a problem. So we never even had to face justice for this. He died before his court case. Police believe Jose was responsible for as many as 10 murders in Mexico City in the early 2000s and they started to piece together all of these dismembered bodies

that they had found in that time period. Not great. I have to ask this question though. If you're in prison, right? Like say you're a lifer. You're a hardened lifer. And you're in there and they bring in a guy who's a cannibal. do you off them or do you just kind of like I want to see what this guy's deal is oh yeah for sure I want to talk to him for a bit yeah before we kill him right I mean wouldn't that be a more interesting person to have a conversation with than like say a musician or some asshole like that yeah like just the person who walks in like I'm completely innocent all that bulls yeah I'm like okay whatever I got no time for this guy you yeah I want to talk to this guy this guy sounds interesting oh the other thing I didn't mention you saw how he injured he was he jumped he was out of the

on the second story, his apartment, he jumped when the police came and heard himself jumping and then ran into traffic, got hit by a car. Perfect. It's pretty good stuff. I just have to say, though, it's wild that there's just like, what year was this? This is 2007. Wow. So my guy was 22, he got arrested.

It's just wild that there's so many, like, Mexican cannibals. Yeah, I was surprised by that, too, especially ones that are able to get away with it for a long time, apparently. Like, nobody gives us a shit. there's other problems. It's just like, hey, I can abduct and eat women, peel their faces off and keep their scalps. We live in a country where there aren't any other problems, but in Mexico there's a lot of other problems. Oh, I, you know, I mentioned it earlier and I didn't really harp on it. When my guy was like skinning off their faces and shit, he was using an audio tape recorder

and they had all of the audio of all of it to play in court. This is cheating. So this is cheating. Your presentation is a rap, my friend. That was to be a fun jury to be on. Your presentation is a crap, that is cheating. So go to the creepoff.com, vote for who brought the creepiest Mexican this week, celebrating Cinco de Mayo a day after Cinco de Mayo, which would be what de Mayo, Vinny? Cinco de Seis? No, Maya was May. Seis de Mayo?

Wow, I'm really bad at Spanish. We do. I didn't take Spanish. I took French. Hey, Vinny, not that I can speak French at all either. Did you know that today, aside from me in the day after single of Mayo, is also Super Chat Monday. I was not aware.

The chat did not tell me. We're not even celebrating it. We should be because I see the mechanical ape is here to celebrate it with us. $5. Can you read that, Vinny? No. I think it says, Carl's amazing.

Don't vote for Vinny. If I had to translate that on the fly. Feliz Luna's de Super Charla, Vota poor Vinnie. I don't think that's what that said. I don't know. That was my translation. Two-Baslawing bastard. Sorry, boys.

No super chat for me today. What the fuck? Why not? Come on. Super Chip Monday. Not even one. Killing me. Troy Smith coming on.

Human tacos, corn or flour tortillas? Great question. Troy Smith just named the episode. That's good. I like it. Great question, Troy. The answer is corn. Always corn.

Always corn. Yeah, because the human meat is greasy. Is that why? Yeah, you don't want to put it in like the flower ones because then it'll all just fall apart. Interesting. interesting you know too much about this I know what I know well you're probably eating Italians that's why

it's why it's so greasy yeah a lot of cholesterol a lot of cholesterol all right guys thank you for your generosity and for participating in the show we do appreciate that we got to move on though you've heard our presentations you're going to go vote synchina mayonnaise that's of course

so you know what that means Vinnie it is time for a presentation of Carl's cop cam hit the drop I can't wait to see Carl's Cockham Fight with the cops for no reason Will you please show me Carl's Cop Cam

Lose all your rights Ruin your life A banger That's a great song Stephen All right so Carl's Cop Cam this week I asked Vinny this morning If he'd like to see the Elisa Jordam body cam footage that came out that all takes place after the incident that we've all seen

and then she gets arrested and Vinny said, no, that woman's annoying. I don't want to see her ever again. I believe I said boring and annoying. Okay. So I said, yep, that's fine. Jeff Spangler actually sent us a fun one. This is a gentleman who's, he's the one filming this, not the police that we're watching. So he thinks that this is important stuff to document.

He just got pulled over for running a stop sign and we pick up there. Oh, well, they're obviously harassing him for running that stop sign. Time, time is, I just, I guess I'm a, I'm a, I'm studying to be a lawyer and I know, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a doctor of psychology. And so I just, I get to the like, like, fine detail of, of, yeah, yeah, no, I hear you. So I'm just, yeah, I just stop longer. I can do that. Out of the car. Out of the car.

Shut the fuck up. Correct. So we're already starting off with the, did I tell you about my degree and the fact that I also study the law? These fucking constitutional scholars, man. Watch out for them. I'm a big fan of the Constitution. I hate every constitutional scholar I've ever seen. If I'm this cop, I'm like, I bet your name is Billy because I got a club named after you. Yes, that would be fine. I got a club here with your name out of that asshole. Super Chat covened from Space Age Hamburger.

Thanks to the 999, he says this show is great because of of Carl, always vote Carl. Yay, Super Chats. That is correct, Space Age hamburger. I haven't seen Space Age around before. I appreciate that. It's amazing. We found a Carl fan. Thanks for joining it. It's amazing, isn't it? It is.

So, of course, the police officer's just, okay, can I just see your driver's license? And that's where we pick up on our next clip. Well, did you know that as a therapist, that it will hurt my feelings if I give you my license? Yeah, I don't know anybody.

No, sir, I do not contract. I'm traveling. So, so, um, I don't, I mean, I do personally own a driver's license. So I'm not trying to break the law or anything. Um, but, uh, um, the United States Constitution lets me travel without one. So, and I'm not going to accept any contract with, with, uh, the city of Lewiston or anything like that. Look how patient this police officer is being with this nonsense, this horse shit. Sir, when the Constitution was written, we didn't have motorized vehicles, okay? His whole thing is just like, it's not the Constitution. I have to show my driver's license.

Like, okay, this is kind of outside that it's Constitution. Not every single thing was written in that document, sir. I hate sovereign citizens. Yeah, oh, that's what this guy is. Yep. Well, did I tell you about the one that I knew? Remind me. Yes, you did.

Yeah. he was so dumb dude and so brazen this motherfucker right he decided he didn't need to have insurance he didn't need to have a driver's license he took everything off of his car was I don't even know if he was making a payment

on his SUV that he had and it was a nice little truck and wait a second as a severed citizen you can just steal cars that's awesome he doesn't believe in contracting with anybody I like that idea unless it's with you and you owe him money right that's But he was a web designer, and so I met him through a friend, and he designed some stuff for me, and he did a great job, but he was just, I would meet up with him and, like, to go over stuff, and he was just telling me all about this.

And then eventually he just doesn't show up one day, and I'm like, what the fuck? And I found out it was because he was getting his car to load by the police because the motherfucker, what he did was he found a state that you didn't have to have any stickers in your window. In New York State, you have to have your inspection and your registration stickers in the window. Correct. So he, I think it was Missouri or some state where you don't have to have any stickers like that. He went online and printed out paper license plates, put them on something that'd put license plate cover. over them to cover them and keep them safe from the weather and stuff

and a cop got behind him and ran it was like what the fuck is this? Made up nonsense. And his cardboard license plates Yeah, I don't know if they arrested him but he owed a lot of money. Like there was a lot of problems like his license was gone obviously. This is not a fun way to live your life. You will fuck yourself up

so much harder. Just doing the simple thing that all of us responsible adults in America do. You pay for insurance. You have your driver license and you register it. Keep your inspections up. It's annoying. I'm not saying it's not annoying.

You know that in Florida you don't have to actually get your car inspected ever? You could just drive any piece of shit that'll move. That I buy. That I absolutely buy. There's some fun laws going on. Hold on a second. Real quick before you eat these. We got a couple super chats came in.

Well, we'll just hit this one. Gardner fan says this week's creeps bring a whole new meeting to Taco Tuesday. Why are your taco so good? I make them with love and Maria. Arriba, Arriba. Very good. Super happy, fun, chatter. Thanks to the two bucks says,

Future episode, Biggest Creep who can't play media. Yeah, and look at Ray DeVito's face. That's him watching the creep off and you tried to play my video. Even he's disappointed. Bazook Bukaki Joe. Cookey Joe. Five bucks.

I'm chanting taser, taser, like, Beavis when I watch you. Yes. I know. And I don't want to be rooting for the police. That's what's so crazy about these. But these assholes with their stupid. rights. Okay, so clip number three, he explained something. I had no idea that this was a federal law. I had no idea. I don't bet the cops did either. I mean, I pulled over because you flash your

lights. But federally, that's actually a federal offense. Because you're not supposed to use your lights unless it's an emergency, right? I know. That's fine. You don't have to. Yeah, I don't either. I understand. And I just, unless you're going to arrest me for it, I'm not going to get right. No, I know. I know. But if, am I free to go? No. Okay. I'd love to see what YouTube channels this guy subscribes to. I'm a feeling delete laws is out there. I want to describe this guy for our listeners. He is bald, greasy. Yes. Disgusting. He looks like Sam Lascao from trailer park boys a little bit. If you just had a goate, just a

greasy looking shirt. And what appears to be a two-door piece of shit vehicle. Yep. It's dirty as shit. There's fingerprints on the outside of the vehicle that you can see from the inside. That's how dirty and disgusting is. His posture also sucks. He looks like he's probably very obese. Yeah. He is a obese man

in a Pontiac Sunfire and he can go fuck himself. And he's got a stutter. I don't know if he's nervous or what's going on. Actually, sir, I don't have to. And you know, you used your light so that's a federally that's an offense because it has to be an emergency all right buddy

so clip four here we go unlawful detainment oh down this fucking road okay just so you know I am recording this because I can

I can I can unlawful entertainment a civil offense just so you know so you can detain me as long as you need to I'm not in a real hurry to get home okay so that's weird right he's like what a fucking weirdo he wants this yes he wants this

this isn't a lawful detainment i just want to let you know but i'll go for it it's all right you can hold me down well we're going to find out why in just a moment before that holy shit nailed it s nailed it it's tobias funk okay yes good call totally yes oh my god rest of development very good way to go all right so um yeah fuket fogg because this guy looks like he stinks. Clip number five. So listen, sir, we just need your registration and your insurance and your driver's license. No, but you could take me away if you'd like to. Got it. Oh, I hate him. Registration and insurance here? No. No, no, sir. This is a privately owned vehicle. It's not registered with the state. It's not, it's not, what we'd say, owned by the state. So I just don't

agree to the contracts, but you can run my play with the Department of Transportation. It is a valid number. Can we? Just show him the fucking registration and insurance if you have it. What's the difference? What are you trying to prove? What are you trying to accomplish here? You know what I don't understand about this?

Everything, hopefully? Well, listen, you know, you don't want to suck off the cops too much because let me ask you this question. It's 20 fucking 24. Why do I have to have a paper. registration. That's a good point. What the fuck are we even talking about here? I got to show you my registration. Scan the fucking license plate with the computer that's attached to your goddamn dashboard. Can't

they do that? Don't they do that anyway? Like, they're just trying to catch you on something here. There's no fucking point. I understand having to see insurance. I get that. Sure. But you know, most of the time you can just show them the fucking thing on your phone now. I got to have a little fucking piece of paper in my glove box. I mean, it's a bridge, Does the state say I have to have a little piece of paper? Is it a pretty too far? Is it that fucking difficult? Do I have to have a piece of paper?

No, you should get the Chilida Castro trifold is what you need, buddy. All right. I'm pretty sure that's what this guy's following right now because he's just not agreeing to do anything. And so you heard him say, this is unlawful detainment, but no worries. I can sit here for a while. You're going to find out why. This is fucking crazy.

So you're just, I see what you've titled this. You're just learning what this is. this is what they all go for everybody okay if you have not seen this i didn't i'm not aware of this this is not to learning about the craziest part of this the fee schedule but um i do have a fee schedule um it is $5,000 for every you know 15 minutes you'll hold me up just so you know so if you want to run the numbers i'll let you i can i you will be liable for a civil suit because i am a state national uh yeah state national so he can charge the police department five thousand dollars every 15 minutes that he's sitting there in this traffic stop now who's

slowing up the traffic stop viti let me ask you that who do you think is slowing things down i'm not going to show you anything looking up for yourself yeah yeah he's like maybe that's why he stutters too it's just time is money baby so my dude who i used to know tried to explain the fee schedule thing to me and I said you're out of your goddamn mind because here's what they believe and I'm trying to remember this. I like they were saying it as if they're like Scientologists or Mormons like listen to what they believe. This is crazy. It might be a religion dude. It might be because it's so stupid. They believe that the United States government was foreclosed upon by some other national court and they go by this ruling that forecloses on the government

and they say that because of that ruling they are contracted into that ruling not this ruling. So none of this applies to them at all because he's a state national or a sovereign citizen and search your brand of bullshit title for it here. But there's a penalty for harassing people because they beat America. They already shot down the government. So if you are harassing them and holding them up and costing them time, you are now causing damages to them so they could set up a fee schedule however they want to. But in their original paperwork, if I were recall. It needed to be repaid in silver. So I've seen these videos with these assholes go, and you will have to pay me $5,000 in silver, officer. It's amazing. Let me just go get my

pile of silver. I'll be right back, sir. You're right. Let me go to my treasure chest. It's so insane. I'll be right back to pay you. I'll go to the land of make believe. Well, the crazy thing is, and I don't even know what you're talking about, I haven't got that deep in any of this stuff. But, okay, let's say that the government no longer exists. There's foreclosed upon whatever. It doesn't matter because they're pretending it didn't. And you know what? That's all it takes. The whole concept of government

is just a concept. That's all it ever was. And the fact that our government allows these people to have guns in their pocket and force you to do shit you don't want to do is the system. Sorry. It sucks. It is. That's what it is. It's the most basic thing. You look at the reality of what is happening.

There's a man with a gun on his hip who's telling you, in order to do what you're doing, you need to follow these laws. I will shoot you in the crazy part. That man with the gun on his hip, when you go to court with him, the court likes him better. He's going to be favored in that trial. So good luck with that, dummy. Okay.

So now this cop's had enough. And he's being very patient. But now he has to bring up another officer like, can you deal with this guy for me? So now another cop shows up. Is it the supervisor? Because they always love to ask for the supervisor. Probably. Yeah, no problem.

How are you doing, sir? Good, how are you doing? Good, how are you doing? Good, how are you doing, sorry? Good. I'm doing good. I'm doing good. Well, yeah, I'm not required to by actual law because I haven't broken the law.

Are you? You obviously have a couple stop-side violations according to my officer. Okay, so that is a traffic violation. Right, right, violation is not the law sir. Right, it is. It's a code. It is a difference. Right under what, only under what law or code is it?

Well, it's 49-8. 49807.2 is for running to stop. Okay, so that's a, that's a code. I love it because it was, well, it's 498072 is the specific code. Yeah, I deal with this every day. In fact, we memorize these for assholes like you. For assholes like you. I don't want to go back and look at the book, so I know precisely what law you broke and violated and why we're doing this.

I can't unsee David Cross now. I know. Someone wrote in here that the reboot of Mr. Show is pretty good. I really can't. And like I said, Sam Loscom, it's only because this guy is greasy like a caveman. But he is fucking Tobias. This is incredible. Okay.

Well, you're going to find out, just like Tobias was overeducated. You're going to find out this guy's really smart. Yeah. Oh, is this guy an anaerapist too? I do have a PhD. I'm actually really smart. I read a lot. I'm actually listening to a book on contract law right now.

Who gives a fuck what you're listening? Who Gives a fuck? Jesus. You're trying to impress them? I know that my car is a piece of shit, but I'm actually a Ph.D. Well, then that's sad, sir. Then that's not good. You should be doing better in life than arguing the cop about fucking rolling a stop side. Hand over your fucking license, get your ticket, and pay it.

Officer, you know, I used to be the announcer for the Tonight Show. It's just a shitty fucking car. All right, so my next clip here, now I was going to try to trip the officer up he's going to try to outsmart him okay let me ask you this is this uh what say you a civil law that i broke or is it a criminal law that i don't traffic fit i don't traffic fit yeah so you didn't answer my question though is a civil law or a criminal law okay no i don't need to digging. I mean, you guys can write me a ticket if you want, and we can deal with this in the court of law. But, yeah, you bet. And, and, and then it's, and then my fee schedule, like I told the

officer, is, is, we're not worried about that. Well, okay, that's fine. I'm not trying to be a jerk, sir. I, I, I, I just know the law probably a lot better than you. Oh, that's what these always all say, too. I just know the law probably a lot better than you. I'm studying to be a lawyer. You know, it's a civil law or criminal law? He's like, oh, got him. Trips him up. It's the same goddamn tune. Just different instruments.

This gets nuts right here because if you haven't heard enough bragging, wait until you hear this next one he comes up with. Okay. Okay. Okay, so I'll give you my passport under duress. Okay. Oh, shit. Hold on.

I'm sorry. I set up the wrong clip I set up the wrong clip So this one So finally The guy's like So am I free to go They're like no you're not free to go

You ran the red light Or you ran the stop sign We're trying to figure this out So he's like okay If I'm under duress Then I'll provide you with my passport Which is not what they're looking for at all It's not helpful

Okay Okay so I'll give you my passport under duress Okay Um Yeah You have a valid driver? I'm pretty sure if you run this in your system, you'll see that I do. But I do not agree to the contract.

I'm only letting you know because, you know, I think we're, yeah, we're at 10 minutes already. So that's at least violent. You're the one that's making the following in each week. No, no, you guys are because you guys flash your lights, just so you know, you flashed your lights, which is a federal offense in a non-emergency situation. How was he supposed to get pulled over? I don't understand. Like, what's the mechanism to pull someone over then if they're not

allowed to flash their lights? Okay. I'm running for office now. I've decided officially. Okay, good. Here's the deal. I want to be the new DA of Monroe County. And here's what I'm going to tell the cops.

You got my vote. Okay. Here's what we're going to tell them. Yeah. Turn the camera off. What you do is you take your camera, you physically remove it. Yep. Leave it on.

But, you know, make sure that their window is open. If not, use the camera to smash the window and take that camera and just smash them over the face with it. Like face, face, nose particularly. Yes. Disfigure these people. Now, I'm just, can I stop here real quick? This is probably a closed door meeting that we're having right now, right? Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I don't think you should run on this. And then what you do is you hold their bloodied face up to a mirror and you say, do you know how that kind of looks like a face which you're telling me about looks nothing like a law and trust me I know the better

any more questions sir and then what you do is you take the ticket that you wrote them and you slap it out of their bloody forehead it'll stick yes and then you leave them there at a heap and you know if their car you know is fucking illegal and you have a toad well you also tell them tell your buddies

about me hey make sure you go run to all your little sovereign citizen friends tell them about me Word gets around. Your word will get around very quickly, not to fuck around like this. You are, we're almost to 10 minutes, sir. Oh, your fee schedule. Is he incredible?

He's like, you're the one holding us up. Why won't you give us anything? What is the license? He goes, okay, you can get my passport, and then you can scan that, and then you can run that to try to figure out if I have a driver's license or not. All of this is just wasting everyone's time. Uh, but Kooky Joe, for the eggs of the five bucks. If this video does not add like Rodney King, I will never super chat you all again. and in kind this time.

Well, hold on a second. By the way, this is a white guy. Yeah. Beat his ass! I know. You know what? I should have spliced it Rodney King footage at the end of this. It would have been a better payoff.

But, all right, so this is where the, uh, the bragging gets nuts. No one told me there was going to be boasting. My next clip. Okay. Yeah, I know. I understand. I mean, I, I, I, so, so I'm, so I'm, I'm a black boat in Brazilian Jitsu and I teach a lot of officers and I've had to study the law in regards to what you can and can't. What's a choke? What's not a joke? All that kind of stuff. And it's not a job I would want because there's a lot of legality in here. What's your point? You gave an oath, right, to uphold the Constitution. Some officers every once in a while confuse that with the state constitution, but the state constitution does say that the United States Constitution is supremely.

This fucking guy His voice is getting more and more irritating too, isn't it? He's just getting Ing-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-Officer I'm a Brazilian Blackbell Jiu-Jitsu master and I teach police officers Megan-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-K. Okay.

I've been on the internet talking to hot babes all day. Right. So then Kip, yeah. And then clip 12, the cop is finally like, I can't waste any more time with this asshole. finally true law requires that

either even for this commercial code if we call the commercial code if you just play with me in that imagination station right that under commercial code it's a contract if it's admirable maritime law

there needs to be an agreed upon contract and I don't agree on the highway Right. All right. Am I free to go? All right. Thank you. Okay. So they wrote him a ticket. They gave him the ticket. And they're like, look at drive safe. Stop running. Stop sides. Am I free to go? Yes. You're free to go. Because the cop finally at that point, she's like,

I can't fucking take this nonsense anymore. I have one more clip on there, Vinny. This is, this is the big payoff. This is why this guy posted this video. Remember, the annoying asshole who we hate is the one who posted this. And this is why. Oh, don't tell me. He's going to try to dunk on. everybody now. Oh, this mouse is so fucked up, Carl. Sorry. Oh, it sucks. I'm sorry.

It's not your fault. Track pads, baby. Track pads are the way to go. Tell everyone. Well, you called it a rolling stop? So that means stops within them. Okay. All right.

Sure. Okay. Thank you. That's how it's done, folks. He took a victory lap at the end. notice he has to talking about losing his virginity. Fucking loser. So he goes, you call it a rolling stop?

Well, the word stop is in rolling stop. So I guess technically I did. I was like, okay, whatever. Have a great day, sir. Go about your day. And then he goes, see, that's how it's done. What did you accomplish with that? You didn't give them the driver's license and registration.

Neat. It took you way longer. You still got a ticket. I don't understand. I bet you that cop knows not to tango with me again. You're probably right. I want to see the follow of video. where he successfully sues them for $5,000.

That's what I want to see. Then I'll believe that he actually accomplished something. Until then, I'm not buying it. I'm with you, part of it. That's how it's done, folks. I'm with you. Wow. What a cunt. That was mind-numbing. Are you ready to do some voicemails, buddy?

I am, buddy. The creep-off voicemail segment is brought to you by the city of Syracuse. Hope you had a great Star Wars Day. We here at Syracuse would like to thank the series for normalizing the fact that it is not unusual for things to get shittier and shittier over time. See you in Syracuse. All right, this one came in during the show, but I could read it, so we'll give it a shot.

This is for the creep off. The other day I was watching one of those cop cam videos from their badges, and one of the people that they were chasing who was engaged in burglary dropped something. And when they picked it up, they were carrying... wire cutters, I think a hammer and a screwdriver, and they charged them with carrying implements for burglary. Okay. And I suddenly realized that's what Lisa meant when she said she was picked up for a screwdriver.

Thank you, fuck you, fuck. Yes, good point. So Lisa Boswell, we found out it broke into at least 20 homes back when Lisa was a man, broken into 20 homes to steal women's undergarments and jerk off with them. too embarrassed, Bob. So, yes, if you have the tools, they'll help you get into a home, then I think that they could use that against you.

I think so, too. Pretty good thoughts. Congratulations to Danny from someone who also thinks that your presentation has helped save America. Good. Hey, guys, first things first, Danny, congrats on the win, a big fan.

Second of all, Carl, you really need to tell me that all the world leader go and decide who's going to be the president in this one grove I think we have a shot of a do-over and actually getting this done right does anybody have North Korea's phone number guys I think I'm going to fix it

I want to control all delete it who why has nobody thought of this Al Qaeda is so fucking stupid they're going to fix America a long time ago thank you fuck you bye I'm not endorsing that I wouldn't cry about it if it were to happen I wouldn't be upset

Oh, well, there goes us. I'm just saying, I'm not endorsing it, but interesting thought. Hey, thank you, Vinny, for getting that T-shirt sent out very quickly. Appreciate it, man. Hope you have a good rest of your week. Thank you, fuck you, bye. Wasn't me, my friend, it was Patreon. Right, Patreon.

So, Patreon, remember, if you subscribe to the creep off Patreon, where you get a bonus episode every week, you also get some cool merch. You do. After three months, you get a shirt or some shit. A mug, stickers. The shit we ain't. Who in here just wrote, we got to get Lisa Boswell. Oh, Chris Popke. We got to get Lisa Boswell as a third mic on the creep off.

We really should get Lisa on here. That'd be amazing. I think she'd probably do it. I don't know if she has the technical fortitude. They've had guests on that show before. Yeah, I think Helga does all that, though. Helga, you're going to have to sit in the corner. We're a package deal.

I like your Helga impression. Dude, I do Helga and Lisa all day long. Me, dude, it's in my head. It's so obnoxious. I can't stop myself. Is it in your head? The shit it ain't. Is it in your head?

I like how she tries to just sneak stuff in. I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what thing. If you vote for Trump, you are voting for a dictator. That's right. That he wants to round us all up into camps. Is that what you? you all, a dictator.

I was mowing someone's law the other day and one of the blades got stuck in the grass. I love how much you're studying this show, as much as I am. It's great. Michael Cises, by the way, thanks for the doubt. Carl was the guy arguing with the cop's your brother? It was not

my brother. That was not Grant in there. By the way, speaking of my brother, see him at the hackamania. He's going to be performing stand-up comedy. He's got his act altogether. He's upset about it. grant. promo code grant no promo code grant

stop with that hey I got a couple of voicemails for us. Grant 316 hold on one second one more super chat last slide 1899 thanks to three bucks Carl you don't get it he educated the cop oh you know what you're right in his mind he's like I had to explain his police officer that using

his lights to pull some number it's not an emergency is actually like that's the federal car it's just exhausting it's exhausted and I had to watch that whole fucking I'm pretty good with electric fences, too. Hello, my name is Edomé Farquhar. I need a refill on my prescriptions.

Customer number M.O.0213-2016F99. I usually go to the Walgreens on Monroe Avenue, but it got trashed by an unfunny lummox. He ate all the candy, called an Asian boy a jive turkey, and punched him in the face. Then he humped a beanie baby, ejaculated on a pharmacist, and he'd all my glaucoma medication. Oh, no. He called himself the people's champion. Oh, no. I heard police are still looking for him.

Please refill my prescription. My daughter will come by tomorrow to pick it up. Enemy Farquhar, customer number M0-213-2016-99. Thank you. mini you fucking a beanie baby at the walgreens that beanie baby was asking for what was it wearing busted let me tell you something i regret nothing busted i got another voicemail for us here hey carl this is for the creep off you i'm federal law enforcement agent you've never been a cop a day in your life and you are a better cop than that jack wagon that

over their fucking DA. You're absolutely right. She could have a gun. She went in the house. That's the kind of asshole that gets other people fucking killed. So she needs to be prosecuted. He needs to be fired. This ain't the line of work for him.

He might be a nice guy. He's a fucking idiot. Go miss some grammar or some shit. You have this job. You have to be able. You have to know you might have to take a life one day. This fucker ain't it. And then he'll fucking fail.

And someone like me gets hurt. And then I got to shoot the fucker, which I had no problem doing. All right. Wow. That guy sounded a little one hitch at the end, but I appreciate it. But yeah, I wish you would have tackled Sandra Dorley. I went on all apologies. I'm pretty sure that guy just deputized you.

I think so. Yeah, sweet. I went on all apologies last night with Andy and Joe. Never heard of it. It's a podcast. And we were talking about Sandra's apology. But even better, she did an interview was one of the local news stations. Oh, I watched it.

Did you watch it? She's an insane person. Why is she out there doing these interviews? because you can't answer the questions. Why don't you just pull her for the cops? She's like, I can't answer that. I had a bad day. She kept talking about how she had a bad day.

She literally wanted that job so badly that she ran for office and did everything she got to raise money to advertise and get people to vote for her to get that job. More work than I've ever put into getting a job. And now she's complaining about the job she has. Or will ever. I mean, what the fuck? Can I add that my favorite part of that interview was when they said to her, so why were you calling the chief of police instead of pulling over and her answer was uh because i was just letting

him know that i wasn't a threat yeah yeah just let why don't you let the officer who pull the fuck over yeah that was a lie it's a blatant lie fucking yeah expect people to be stupid i mean they expect reporters to sit there and go oh yeah that's how little is thought of the media at this point yes or the general population for that matter all of these people when places of authority think that everyone's a fucking idiot and they can just lie to you. You know why? Because that's how they got there. David Lyon and boot scooting

all the way up the ladder, baby. Dude. And that she lost it. The Joe Biden, the Joe Biden shit I've been checking out lately. It's really firing me up because he's on with SmartList. We just covered the NWATP. He was out with Howard Stern. The Howard Stern shit was hilarious because then Howard had to come on the show next week

and try to back up what he was saying with Biden and try to prove that it wasn't like questions that were planted by the White House because everyone's going what the fuck I had an interview is this why is everyone ball washing this guy he can't form a sentence no we agreed

no voting this year right no voting everyone stay home all right on election day stay home at your vote no vote this year baby the only thing we're voting on around these parts is the creep off that's right and libertarians yeah I like them

I'm a fan hey guys just wanted to point out any time, Carl really, really drops the ball. You guys did a week about gangs, and Carl just kind of whiffed it, and then launched into a long

individual piece about the wrongdoing in a police department. Police departments function as gangs for the most part. Oops, Carl. You almost got it. So you think I should have presented that instead of Bohemian Grove? Is that what you were telling

The police. You should have presented the police. All right. Hysterical. Next time. And listen, man, we might need to give this guy a call back. Okay. Hey, Carl, Vinnie. This is Wes.

Real name. Hey, just want to let you guys know that celebrating one year this month of being clean off of opiates after a 15-year battle. And it's all because of all the losers.

Losers and creepos that I've watched on this show and mostly because of stuttering John. Love you. Love the show. Call me back. That's amazing. Congratulations. He does have that effect on people.

He does sober most of them up. Except for Carl. It's pretty amazing. Carl can't get enough drinks when he watches his job. That's true. Yeah, it is funny that John likes to take credit for all these good deeds that he does. He thinks he's curing stutterers and doing all this stuff. He literally is helping people.

and he won't even acknowledge that. He's literally stopping people from drinking and doing drugs just by watching what he's turned into at the age of 58. I can't wait for things to come full circle. And you're just in your lonely. Bachelor apartment. Oh, got my 500 square foot apartment and some shithole. Trying to play guitar, but your fingers are...

My fingers are not working. Your fingers have somehow transformed into your toes. And you can't get the notes anymore, but you're still convinced that you understand who these podcasts are and what the people want to see. Yep. and I'm sitting there going, Howard turned into Amos, I swear to God. He used to make fun of him, but now he didn't turn into him.

I'll tell you, tell him, Andy. Yeah, and he's still there. Just left years ago. And he's the only one who's still there. He's left years ago because he was just like, I don't care for the way you're speaking to me now, Carl. By the way, my band went on Wayo, W-A-O-104.3, and we did a whole hour-long performance on the radio. yesterday. They did a whole video of it. It'll be up on YouTube soon. Oh, that'll be fun for everything. Yeah. So you can, you could see, we play original music

that we wrote, and we can see if it's as good as Stuttering John's original music. Wait a second. I heard you don't do that. I know. There's some nasty rumors going around out there, so we're going to squash it. Squash it. Carl, I got good news. What do you got? It's time for a scum parade. Let's go. a raid of these fuck charades that these creeps have made Scum parade Vinny and Carl

gonna tell you about some fuck shit Scum parade Like stories of a kid fucked by his mom or dad soaking up the blood of a cat Scum parade You know what I hate You hate Chris Popkey pointing out that

Imagine trying to complete a 12-step program with a club foot This is why I can't get better, people It's a good point No, what do you hate, Betty, sorry Well, I hate it when you meet a nice girl I mean, back in the day, I'm a married madman married for 15 years But back of the day you meet a nice girl You know, and then you find out that she's just a prostitute

And trying to get money out of it Oh, that sucks, dude Because you're like, but one of those long conversations we used to have online That meant nothing to you? It's such a bummer. An online encounter ended in multiple charges for one couple, Carl, included an attempted murder charge for a Florida woman named Crystal Skiba. Now, I call her Skeevy Skiba because they take a lot of time to discuss how disgusting her apartment is. Yes.

And how disgusting her children are. Well, black-toothed black-gummed children. It's in Florida, so we're already starting off in a bad spot, and it gets. the worst from there. Dude, it's fucking Hardy County, Florida. That can't be good. No. It's named after like fucking Hardy's owns it. Carl's Jr. runs the town. Big boy's the mayor. Welcome. So deputies get called to the scene by the alleged victim who claimed that schema fired multiple shots at him as he fled her home. Now, this guy's name has been redacted from the story because

no charge has been filed against him, but they had met on Facebook earlier that day, and their conversation was very flirtatious, and apparently this guy was trying to start a horror production company, and thought that her house could be a nice set for one of the scenes. Can I get your

mutant children as extras? Yeah, right. With their fangs? I mean, the article says they have black teeth and black gubs. What the fuck? Yeah. A five-year-old and seven-year-old missing teeth and rotting teeth. They just go walking out of them.

Like, they have tails and shit. That's not normal. Well, you know what? There is no mention of a toothbrush in the Constitution. So if you're an American, you shouldn't be brushing your teeth. Well, even George Washington used furniture polish on his.

That's true. I didn't replace some teeth with wood, but that was the joke. Probably not great. So when he arrived, Schema directed, two young children to go into another room before taking the man into her bedroom. Okay. Now, the arrest report states the man says he spotted a handgun on the bed.

Okay, so you come by and she tells her black-toothed kids to get out of the way, takes you to the bedroom where there's a gun. And you're over there to talk about your horror production company. Well, it was getting fortacious, though. Let's not forget. Sure. So they get in the room and he claims that Skeeba, Skeevy-Skeba, tried to seduce him and get him sexually aroused.

Yep. Which is really hard when flies are landing on you. I would have thought so too, but doesn't she end up giving him a blowjob? Isn't that what the story says? Yeah, she gives him a blowjob. How the fuck do you get it up in this house? I don't know. Like out in the hallway, you hear those two kids going,

one of us. Gimo, gama, what of us? It's fucking awful. So she starts blowing him and he's going for it. And then she adds to the blowjob. You know, you can't leave without paying me. Right. I guess he didn't realize that this was going to be an expensive blowjob considering the state of the home he was in. Figuered this was a freebie.

The man told investigators at that point he tried to leave the home. He's like, I didn't come. You can't charge me. I didn't come. You can't charge me. That's true. That is the law. Obama. It's another one of those Obama laws. He tries to leave the house, but Schema grabs the gun, attempts to block him with his hands in the air. He pleads to leave, walks past her, and as he begins walking to his car, he hears her cocking the gun, and he's like, ah, evasive maneuvers. And he's fucking running to his car. And apparently he was very lucky. He's like, O.J. in the airport, looking for, uh, whatever that rental car

company, I think I even think of it. His dick is probably bleeding because her teeth weren't much better. Right. He's trying to run holding his fucking chewed up dick. And she starts trying to fire the gun, but it jammed. Thank goodness. Yeah. Both children were in the house at the time of this. And this is where the police said this. They said when they went into the house, they found both of the children. They were experiencing deterioration and blackening in their gums and teeth and with some missing that is not consistent with juvenile development. Right. They're not being kept up well. Yeah. So she claims, well, also they found firearms. illegal drugs, paraphernalia.

I'm just going to lead into this, maybe. Let's talk about Matt baby. Let's talk about a yes, sir, re. Let's talk about all the bad things and the bad things, Matt and see. Your kids' teeth are black. Well, there's also cat shit.

I mean, there's a list of things. Mold. Mold. Mounds of trash. Mounds of trash. I mean, this is Cedery John's house. This is how horrific this is. Yes. Roaches, there's no food in the house that isn't rotting I'm guessing this is not a great

place for children to grow up well the cops had a little tried to have a conversation with the kids yeah I imagine these two probably speak their own mutant language clicks and shit but they said

when was the last time you went to school and they went oh no I never been to school I never been to school I don't pay my diet since 20 years

I once killed a man by a dumpster uh you're done showing off now It's $5 and $7. We should just recreate that reality, Joe. Can we do that next week? I agree, Bob.

Okay, I'll buy the wigs. It's all I want to do. Shit you do. Should you weigh. Skeefest charges include second-degree attempted murder, false, imprisonment, and child neglect. She has pleaded not guilty. Well, what's crazy as her story was, oh, no, no, he took a gun and was shooting at me. They're like, um, dummy.

where are the bullet marks? There are bullet marks in his car, not in your house. Nope, those are teeth marks. How does that story check out? Wow. Fun stuff. Turns out she's dumb.

Yep. And easy. All right. Maybe the name of this episode is this is how to easy being skeezy. It's a Cheetos, uh, Cheetos, uh, corn puff joke. I get it. I get it. I get it, Vinny.

You like snacks. We got it. You're a big fan of snacks. We've got to hit some super chat. Yeah, we've had a few roll in here since the last time. We looked at them. No, even higher than that, actually. It's Uncle Poopie.

Uncle Poopie, here we go. I'm late. Curl, you get my Lisa Boswell images? Where did you send him? I hope not. Send it to my email? I don't know. Michael C. Carl has been doing a Lisa voice for years.

I've been doing Lisa's voice for years. What I love about Lisa. You like what I do, do you? You like it? What I hope about Lisa? Like I said on the show, it feels like I've known her my entire life. Like as soon as I was introduced to Lisa Botswell,

I'm like, I don't remember my life without her in it. The grandmother I always wish I had. Matthew Rowley, thanks for the five bucks. Off topic, but I listened to the WATP Stern clips. And Imus was always the more intelligent show. Stern was Beavis and Budhead to Imas's South Park. Yeah. All right.

Yeah, I never listen to IMS. I was just told that he sucked by a guy who now sucks, so I don't know. Yeah, man, my whole perspective could be completely right. Correct. That's what I'm saying. I'm realizing now that maybe I shouldn't have been all in on the Howard Stern show based on what it's turned into. Talking about Ray, when will he be on David Collins

and will squashing it with Ray DeVito become a real podcast to squash the dabble versus beef? I thought it was squashed. I thought the people squashed. Oh, yeah. That reminds me. I've got to follow up with Ray about David Collins because I guess he's been blocked for some reason. David Collins is a great guy. He was just on blind mic on the show yesterday. Very funny gentlemen. I enjoy David. He's great. He's great. He's great. He's great conversations with him. Great kid. He's coming to Rochester. We're going to see him

over the summertime. No, he's just traveling and he's going to stop, pop through. So I said we've got to do a show together. Hit me up. I'll see if I can find you a guest spot somewhere, David. That's true, yeah. Ebnie, thanks to the dollar 99. whatever that is, a pound. Biden passed law, cash refund for bad below jobs. Yes, that is true. Let me tell you about my fee schedule

for blow jobs. If you waste my time, it's $5,000, I charge you. I still am blown away by that, this asshole. Is there any precedent for that? Has there ever been anyone who sued the police for $5,000 and gotten it? You think that if there was, these guys wouldn't have that case number

and be quoting it over and over again. Good point. So there isn't. Okay, thank you. So that was my point. Yeah. All right. Boston, Carl,

an American Airlines flight attendant was indicted Thursday after authority said he tried to secretly record a 14-year-old girl using an airplane bathroom last September. Dude, the first thing I thought of when I saw this is, like, how do you hide a camera in an airplane bathroom? There's not a lot of nicks and crannies in this thing. Like, what you see is what you get. Dude, there's no good way to do this. as we're going to find out. Police have alleged that Estes Carter Thompson

36 of Charlotte, North Carolina, has recordings of four other girls using lavatories on an aircraft where he worked. Thompson was indicted on one count of attempted sexual exploitation of a child and one count of possessions of image of a child sexual abuse depicting a prepubescent minor. Now, he was charged and arrested in January

in Lynchburg, Virginia. He had been in federal custody since then. A lawyer for Thompson said after the indictment by a federal grand jury, he was unable to comment, but apparently what happened was during a midway through a flight September 2nd, 2023, from Charlotte to Boston, a 14-year-old got up to use the main cabin laboratory nearest to her seat, but found it was occupied. Thompson, being the white night that he is, then told her, hey, you know, the first class bathroom is open. Dude, hot chicks get all the breaks, don't they? It's not fair. Let me tell you something, man.

If I could, if these tits could have gotten me a first class bathroom, right? Oh, never once. Never once. Usually when I do that, people turn in disgust. They kick you off the plane. Yeah, they don't even land. Before she entered the bathroom, Thompson goes, oh, hold on a second. Let me wash my hands real quick.

Yeah. And he goes there and says that the toilet seat was broken. Don't touch the toilet seat. It's broken. Yeah. After he left the teen, entered the bathroom, she saw a red seat. stickers on the underside of the toilet seat lid, which was in the open position. Beneath the stickers, Thompson concealed his phone to record a video investigator said.

Dude, it's his phone. When I first read about the camera, I'm like, it must be like a really tiny little camera that bludsoned. He popped his fucking iPhone behind the toilet. Worst off, it's a 15 max. That's a big one, fucking idiot. So she sees this. She takes pictures of the thing.

that's there, and then she leaves the bathroom. Prosecutors allege hundreds of images of child sexual abuse generated through AI were found on his iCloud account as well. Dude, those poor artificial children. They don't deserve that. It's bad enough if you're not real, but you're also getting fucked by a person who's not real too? Jesus.

What a goddamn slippery slope this AI is, isn't it? It's awful, man. This is the fucking... That's the most disturbing part of the story. Fuck it, I expect stewards to be fucking perverts. Sure. I expect a steward trying to catch a glimpse to someone taking a dump. I mean, why not?

Out of all of them. They all look suss. What about the sassy ones on Southwest that like when they're doing the safety instructions, they turn into a rap song? Yeah. They're not looking for people to shit. They love their jobs. Wait, what? You never heard, you ever seen that before?

No. Yeah. fly Southwest more often I will not fly Southwest sucks Southwest made me fly from New York to Baltimore to New York to Florida

Southwest go fuck themselves I forgot about that Holy shit you're bad at booking flights Dude that was not the original thing They ended up moving stuff around Uh huh Uh huh It was not on my itinerary, sir

How are you getting to Vegas through London? Fucking through Greenland I've had their first, motherfucker. Good. Yeah, piece of shit. So they also found four additional videos, like I said, between January and August of 2020, which Thompson recorded a minor using the lavatory.

So you know what that means? He got away with it. This shit worked four times. But all of those girls were younger. This girl's 14. She got her own phone. She knows what the deal is. Couldn't take advantage of her.

That's true. Those kids were 7, 9, and 11. You got video of them not wiping properly. Good for you. I know. Fucking gross, man. So you know how they found those videos from his iCloud account? Yeah.

Thanks a lot, Apple. Whose side are you on? The customer? Or the authorities? Are you on the side of the imaginary AI children? Yeah. Apple. Come on, Apple.

This is a loyal customer here. Buying your phones, every upgrade. Boy, this is fucked. Now, the craziest part about this story, though, Vinny. They contacted the family. they find that there's three other children on this guy's phone taking a shit. And so they reached out to the families. Would it be better if the families didn't know this guy had photos of their children taking a shit?

How does that help them in any way? Let me tell you how happy those parents were. They probably won't even tell their children. They'll just accept the checks from the airlines. That's what they're saying. Oh, you think that's what's going on? Yeah. Uh-huh.

I do think that's what's going on. You're right. Why the fuck would you tell these people? It's horrific. Okay. All right. Fair enough. So don't fly. I bet you the airline's called. I bet you the airline's called. Hey, listen, we had to fire an employee. This happened. We think this is totally heinous. Here's a check for $15,000. No, it's, it's this. You guys can fly anywhere you want in the continental U.S. for the next three months on us. Not odd. Weekends or holidays. No upgrades.

You still got to pay for the bags. One, okay, we'll give you one checked bag, but you got to sign now. What's you got to decide right now All right, let's head over to L.A., shall we? Yeah, what's going on in L.A.? This one's fucked. I don't know. Maybe you'll be behind this guy. I don't know.

A 22-year-old man has been arrested filing a sexual assault on an elderly woman. Okay. And officers Carl's bed with me this whole time. Well, you know my stance on older women, Vinnie. Oh. But I'm going to go ahead and say it. This is going to surprise some people.

I think this one, too much of an age gap. I think this one's a little creepy. be. Yeah, she, 81. He's 22, she's 81. That's too far for me. Talk about a winter spring relationship. That's too far. That's four X, the number of years. That's not good. Walker Gabriel Munez was taken into custody Friday, booked for kidnapping with intent to commit rape. His bail has been sent at $2.1 million. Now, family members of an 81 year old woman told eyewitness news, Munoz committed the X Monday around 6.45 p.m. in the woman's apartment. And it was caught on video because they have a camera

in the house to make sure that the old lady doesn't fall over and die. They could check on her. It's like having a goldfish. You just I'm going to get one of these for my mom's living room. It's great. You don't care enough about your mother-in-law to put her in a home where she needs to be and get the support she needs. But you care about her enough to set up a camera and just let

that record and case something bad happens, you can call the authorities. Or funny. Yeah, probably. They're probably looking for America's funny some videos footage. So the woman cella says the video shows her letting the man into her apartment after he knocked mentally unaware of what she was doing. I don't know how you could tell that from the video. But after checking out of the rooms, he returned to the living room where the camera shows him sexually touching her and making her perform sexual acts upon him.

So do you think this guy when he was growing up as a kid was sexually abused while watching Skeletor on He Man or something? This is a weird fetish to have. They don't want to fuck a skeleton. This kid got raped watching Golden Girls Okay, something like that must have happened That's fucking weird He's got, he ripped

He knocked this old lady's teeth out And had her giving him a gummy blowjob Will he's saying thank you for being a friend and cried That's what happened here In case anybody's wondering I'm pretty sure The video I named this episode gummy blow job

All right It is not It was the other one that we said The video catches of doing things That I wouldn't wish on anyone So the son-in-law there's a lot of elderly people in the community this guy needs to be off the streets

yes agreed yeah and in the homes where he can get gummy blow jobs he's not doing it on the street dummy so listen if you live in L.A. right and your grandma has been raped by a strange 22 year old

you need to call the foothill division of detectives at 818 8343115 serious calls only all right there's no laughing matter so do you think this suddenly Law has uploaded this to Porn Hub yet? Or where could I find this video? I was looking.

I was looking to send me. I got to say, I know Milf porn is a very popular category. I don't think elderly woman porn is racking up the views over there. It could be wrong. You don't think so? You don't want to watch me get fucked? You don't think so?

So my favorite thing about her is how she says things so happily. Yeah. You know, uh, she smiled. I was watching this morning's episode. I'm sorry. but said her head moves like Terrence and Phillip and they're right. Yes. That was hilarious.

I was watching this morning. I'm sorry, we keep going off on. If you don't know what we're talking about, that reality show. If you know, I can fuck you. Lisa Boswell.

And you know, meaning she just stares off to the corner. She's just looking at herself the entire time. That's the video monitor. I caught her like playing with her neck thing that sticks out. Her Adam's apple. Yeah. So you know she just sit there going,

Oh, I've looked better. I forgot the boystries. Yeah, she's got that Bill O'Reilly thing going. Like, you would think, if you stare at yourself long enough, you would do something about that. Yeah, I grew a beard. Smart. Good move. Oh, shit.

All right. Last story, Carl. It's a shame when marriages don't work out. A Washington state man was sentenced to more than 13 years in prison to be followed by three months of community custody. What the fuck is that? 13 years plus three more months of what? Just got to make sure.

He did something really bad. I don't understand that. I've never heard of such a thing. That's so stupid. Washington State sucks, Carl. What do you want me to tell you? Fair enough? He received this sentence for kidnapping

his estranged wife from her home and burying her alive in an attempt to commit second-degree murder. Jesus. So, Vinny, I ask you, do you think that spending 19 years in Afghanistan was a good thing for our military personnel? I think that was a smart move on our part.

Did we bring freedom? Nope. Not even a little bit. Probably should have thought about that before. Probably should have done that, huh? But they were trying to bring freedom, though. They didn't bring it? Well, I think that they were trying to stop.

They didn't even bring them a little freedom? For a minute, a little bit. Women got to take their headdress off if they wanted to. Who cares about that? Yeah, it's not great. I have a feeling that there's a lot of people traumatized by that experience being over in the desert for so long. Yeah, well, this gentleman

Che Kong, Anne, he was 54 years old. He kidnapped his estranged wife from her home on October 16th, 2022. The woman had previously put out a domestic violence protection order against him, and he bound her in duct tape, even going as far as to cover her eyes, but she managed to use her Apple Watch

to send an emergency notification to her trusted contacts. Dude, that would be the craziest Apple Watch ad ever. That'd be so, intense, they should really use that as, because you've seen that before where they say actual story, someone, yeah, right, and so they show someone was rescued. Save me. Yeah, so watching a woman get tied up and buried alive and you're like, oh, this is crazy.

They're like, Apple Watch to the rescue. Hey, Siri. Yeah. They can start a whole campaign called Hey Siri of people almost getting murdered, but thankfully they had their Apple Watch on. Hey, Siri, release Seal Team 6. I don't know why I was Lisa Bottswell all of a sudden. I don't understand.

Yeah, right. Well, the Apple Watch can't save everyone, but it could save you. Dispatch advised they could hear muffled screaming in sounds of a struggle. Officers arrived and found the garage door to the residence open. Cops wrote at the time of the crime, shortly thereafter the children of the resident arrived home and told officer, their mother and father were at home when they left to go to the store about a half hour prior. Officers cleared the home and no one was located.

There was used duct tape found in the home. It is believed to have been used on the victim. Authorities say that Anne dragged the woman into the wood, stabbed her, buried her in a hole 65 inches long, 30 inches wide by 19 inches deep. That is shallow, people. Shallow. That's, I mean, don't you want to be buried alive in a shallow grave, though? Wouldn't that be easier to climb out of?

well i guess my point is that's really easier to climb out of i mean she was stabbed and stuff too so probably thinking like she's gonna bleed out and die here yeah but come spring maybe something will grow sure um vini this is people's like biggest fear right being buried alive yeah this is awful this is really terrible torture i would say well not only did he put the dirt on her he planted a tree like a stamp lead on top of her i mean that's cute that's fun but burying someone alive seems like a sadistic thing to do he got 13 years and then three months probation

keep that in mind everyone I hope they make him like dig holes during that probation they don't just get good at it Vinnie you were just saying how it wasn't a deep hole that's why she's going to learn don't want him get good at it I believe in rehabilitation you're insane

you are an insane person this guy should be flown back to Afghanistan and left there and I'd like to be your district attorney Monroe County please vote for me yes I well. So she believed that she was under the ground for hours, but she managed to get out of the duct tape and escape. She was able to dig her way out of that 19 inches of dirt and tree roots. It was the next day on October 17th when a resident neighbor woke up to the sound of the woman pounding on the door and asking for help. She said, my husband's trying to kill me. And they called the police. Now, she had walked between 20 and 30 minutes to get to that home. As for Chay, and a person walking on a trail found his vehicle approximately 200 yards off the road. In minutes, Thurston County deputies and Lacey cops responded, found the vehicle and arrested the defendant. So they caught him pretty quickly because he never thought she would get out.

Right, yeah. That problem's done. Next. And he got a plea deal. Check it out the to do list. Moving on. Yeah, they wanted to get him for the maximum. This is why I don't understand about this. You're out. What is my client's crime here? Landscaping. This is horrific what this guy did, and he's getting a slap on the wrist for it. It's just psychotic. The defense said the defendant of former military intelligent warrant officer of three decades lived with PTSD.

You know, it's funny. Some people with PTSD have a hard time sleeping at night. They have some flashbacks. They have a hard time burying a proper... Others kidnapped their ex-wife and then trying to bury them alive. Yeah, it's a big range of things that happen. Kids, that is this week's scum parade. Thank you for joining us.

What a fun episode. Wow, we were setting off iPhones in the chat. Sorry about that. Hey, Siri. Porn. Hey, Siri, hang up. Hey, Siri. Hey, Siri.

Hey, Siri. Call mom. Oh, no, it's so mean. We're a bunch of pricks. All right, everybody. Thanks for tuning in. We're out of here. Don't forget to vote at Creepoff.com this weekend on your bonus episode.

And check us out at Hackamania. We're going to have a lot of fun in Vegas. So if you're considering it, make it happen. You will be upset that you missed out. You will. Hold on, Carl. I want to remind everybody what's happening on Friday. We're hunting peddows.

Coming up Friday for all you bonus content subscribers. That's right. Patreon, supercast. Oh, yeah, baby. Backed up by. We're hunting pedos. This would be a lot of fun. one out you're going to jail

that's just my favorite part hey okay hold on text farts in has there ever been a bigger creep than viny yes no not bigger not bigger come on come on jfk had junk just said my watch just called stevie tomatoes oh no oh no we just we finally got away with that too now we're getting our listeners to call See which is a disaster. Oh, man. I'm just waiting for them to issue the warrants. They're going to add three more months to our probation now.

Don't forget to follow our results girl, Danny. Hey, Danny. At Danny desolation. She's just having to follow her. Do it. Yes. We recommend it. We got it.

Thanks, guys. This is getting stupid. Vinny, Vinny, Vinny. Play my music. It's more important to be nice. Good gear. Yeah. I'm