The Creep Off - Episode 228: Labor Day Dick-off!

Episode Date: September 2, 2024

Karl & Vinnie are not laboring today, instead we bring our latest Dick-off! We joined Dick and Sean on the Dick Show for a scum parade! Check out the Dick Show Here at https://thedickshow.com/Check out the stories here: Man jailed for impersonating Miami Springs pizzeria, delivering disgusting pies, police say (local10.com)Diving instructor caught on GoPro 'masturbating' above student under water - Daily StarMassachusetts cop Matthew Farwell charged with strangling murder of pregnant woman Sandra Birchmore | Daily Mail Online

Ola creepos. It is Labor Day. Carl and I took the day off, but yesterday we were hanging out with our pals Sean and Dick on The Dick Show, and we brought him a couple of scum stories. We figured we released that to you guys today, and we would be lazy and take the day off. You know how we do. Good news is we'll be back on Friday for you bonus content subscribers, and we're back with a brand new fresh episode of me kicking Carl's ass Monday at 1. Enjoy this episode But most importantly remember It's nice to be important But it's more important to be nice Gagia

Attention parents What you're about to see Is not suitable for kids Shoot It's not even suitable for some grown-ups You might want to walk away now If you ain't into these type of things I'm going to give the people

What they want Sensation Horror shock I'm gonna deliver the guns because I'm alive and I'm not backing down. Cuckoo, cuckoo! You know, Carl, I feel like I'm his, I'm Vito's doctor. I can't suggest they lose weight.

Right. Yeah. You're doing a bad job. How are you guys doing? Good, man. Vinny, ever get fat jokes? How do you respond to that? Oh, I block everyone immediately.

Okay, good. Especially paying customers. Yeah, everything's on my pie hole. You guys are comedians. How do you feel about fat jokes? Are they like not funny? They're the best. I'm a big fan of them.

We have a cross-in-stores series that's only based on fat jokes. do you really no you and i do oh yeah yeah it is entirely that people's the only thing we talk about it's the only thing i want to talk about right you know where i stand dick you've seen our text chain uh yeah you've lost weight so i definitely know how you stand there's no one's more vicious against fat people than former fat cells oh he goes to those pro wrestling conventions and finds the most morbidly obese assholes awkwardly walking around and just sends me and dick videos of them. It's fantastic.

Yeah. Yeah. It's like a Nat Geo special. Yeah. And there he is. It is natural habitat. I'm wearing a t-shirt. He is very at home here at the pro wrestling convention.

One custom to the smells. You kidding? Do you guys think that when do you think Aaron Imhold's going to get picked up by the cops? Okay. So I'm glad you guys cover that. I was listening earlier when you were talking about it. So here's the thing. Here's what I learned.

Aaron's on this one year probation where he's facing 90 days in jail if he breaks the probation. However, the revenge porn was sent in May. Right. So that would not count against his probation sentence. So is that, has a lawyer told you that? Because Ralph, who has, Ralph,

Ralph talked about all this for like, four hours from the criminal side. And he said that if you're on, if you have a suspended sentence like that. As a criminal. As a criminal and revenge pornographer. Right. You would know. What a dual threat. Yeah. He's

probably the only person with intimate knowledge of all of these processes. He's lived it. He's lived it. He said that even getting picked up for this, if you did it before, could endanger your, could trigger your suspended sentence. You asked him a lawyer.

told me this. No, a law tober told me this. Oh, a law tuber. So I just in the law tuber. Which one, the fat one or the lazy-eyed one? Yeah, the fat one with the white beard who hates Nick Ricada. Dude, the fucking potentially diabetic, the law couch, this guy named Sean.

Yeah. Yeah, John Martin, yes. Potentially criminal. Oh, yeah, potentially criminal. Sorry, what did I say? Oh, him too? You're right. Sean Martin's his name, yes. He got famous because he was on, Nick would let him on his show to talk about the law. Yeah. And now he just fucking hates him.

He's like, he did a stream seething about how Aaron didn't cover his tracks of the revenge born properly. Oh, he should have. All you had to do was tell the cop that you didn't know or don't talk to the cops. And you said that you might not have or you don't remember. Aaron, what's wrong with you? So he wants

crimes to go like unpunished because he hates Nick so much. Yeah. He just wants, it's like, yeah, well, he deserves it. So the end... Crazy. The end justifies the means. And he's like, he's 600 pounds. Ralph found footage of him talking to his wife, who's, like, similarly sized. Yeah.

I don't want to guess which one's fatter, but they definitely need equipment to have sex if they're having it at all. Wow. You mean like, like, like, like, like, like, hoist from like SeaWorld or something. Yeah, sea world. Yeah. And they got to give the, uh, the jaws of life. The manatee, a, uh, a CT scan. Yeah.

They're talking about their wedding. Yeah. Sean Martin. Because I was playing this on WATP this week. his breakdown of it and he read Aaron's date of birth he was born like 86 and Sean goes oh man he's younger than me yeah you look like Santa Claus

course he's younger than you what do you mean he was surprised by that like he thought oh like they could be mistaken for the same age somehow yeah yeah it's like Aaron's only like 37 yeah he's not even 40 yet get the fuck out wow he's fucked up a lot for it wow he really has

wow Can you imagine you came to Hackamania in Vegas with us, and we were talking a lot about Aaron Hymolp at the time? And I imagine you had no idea the connection to Nick and all of these charges. I think at that time, everything was new. It was brand new. The only thing I knew about Aaron is I saw, I saw like a couple clips from their hot tub stream.

And I said, oh, that girl, that young wife of his is way too hot to be with. a guy who's broke and looks like that she's going to get offers all the time to step it up yeah I think she's swimming in it right now so to speak you know how I feel about Ethan Ralph you know

him and I have handed out on your show back when I was in L.A. But I got to say the photo of Ethan Rout with his arm around Kayla Nick and April is the funniest thing to happen from all of those court appearances it's hilarious I haven't seen it. Ralph went out

there. Oh, did he? Yeah, Ralph went out to cover Nick's trial, which was actually great, because nobody was covering it. Like, Kiwi Farms went out there and they, they're like retarded. Like, they're like, oh, Ralph stinks. That was their court, their court notes. And Ralph took amazing notes and reported it, you know, accurately. But he's there just with his arms around the girls hugging Kayla. Oh, hilarious. God. God, I hope he walks. Who, Riccada? Yeah, Riccada.

I think he's going to. Me too. It sure seems like there's plenty of, like, reasonable doubt at a lot of levels just from what... The star witness is going to be in fucking prison getting murdered while during his trial. Like, how does this look? Hey, where's your star witness? Can we delay the trial for two years? Because our star witness is in prison for felony harassment and revenge porn.

He's not getting extra commissary. Oh, God. would it be bad if Aaron had like a ton of commissary in prison would that inspire any feelings of jealousy like if he got sent like 500 bucks yeah yeah yeah yeah hey white boy anyway what do you guys have for us today

oh man dick I got three stories for you today and I know you just got back from Miami I found a story that would piss you the fuck off because I know it made me very upset There's a 55-year-old guy down in South Florida who has been charged with felony, forgery, and defrauding customers. Basically what he did was he went to Staples and he got a bunch of flyers made up in the guys of a local pizza place named Roman's Pizzeria, a very beloved place. Hey, Zeus Roman. It's a real place.

Okay. So he changed the phone number on it to his cell phone. And then he went to all the local hotels by the airport What a fucking asshole Oh yeah Okay So he puts all the flyers on the doors Out on the cars

And he starts getting calls And this tastes like de journo Is this a Dejorno pizza? What is that? Carl some of these pizzas This motherfucker would drop off Didn't we're even cooked They were wrong

He actually delivered the pizzas Yeah He would do it by cash He would show up and take the cash and the pizza Like at the time the people opened it He was gone Can I say So Dick you were just in Miami

You were talking about how great it is I agree with you That's why I live in Florida as well Yeah If you order pizza in Miami You kind of get what you deserve I'm sorry I'm just like gonna say that You're not wrong

Why really it's not known for good pizza No I can see good I mean I'm sure But it's a big city But I would guess Cuban food And stuff would be really You know would be really good But

Yeah they do a lot of good is there. Pizza is not one. I mean, honestly, that's the best, that's like the, the best thing that he could have done is try to make pizza. If I'm shit-faced at a hotel in Miami ordering pizza, I'm probably going to pass out before it gets there anyway. But if some guy shows up with like a half-cooked ball of dough and some ingredients, I'm

going to go, you know what, I'm going to, you know, that's okay. You'll give it a run. Yeah, I'll give it a run. I always times you walked out of your hotel room the next morning and stepped on the pizza that you ordered. For me, it's been at least a dozen diet. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So this guy's name was Jose Marty Alvarez, and this place, Romans, was getting bombarded with calls from pissed off people going, what the fuck is this that your delivery guy just gave me?

And the dude who owns it's losing his mind. Dick, it took them three years. Three years to catch this guy. Oh, my God. He got away with that. Why was he using somebody Reels Pizza place? Why don't he just make like fucking dirtbags pizza or Homeboy's pizza? That's my thought, too.

And this is what pisses me off about this story Is that this guy who owns Romans They're getting all these negative Yelp reviews People are complaining and stuff like that How easy would it be to catch this asshole Just grab the flyer Order a pizza for yourself And then he's busted when he shows up

Well no he used the name He hears shoot him So you look him up Well no he used the Roman's name Because it's a known It's a known thing So it's like oh Romans I love Romans Oh you just remind me

It's like oh yeah yeah I used to order from there all the time I'm gonna order as opposed to, you know. Someone just Googles it and looks up and says, oh, yeah, Romans is a place. True. God, that's a fucking prick.

That's what I'm saying. And you know, the worst part is he ended up getting arrested and he's facing an aggravated battery charge because they were onto him at a day's in. Okay? He shows up at a day's in. I guess there was some type of stagger. The employees were waiting for him and they saw him and recognized him.

And he ran to his van as quickly as possible. and he ended up running over or hitting one of the hotel staff with his car on the way out. A pizza caper. This sounds like a Grand Theft Auto Mission. Totally. You kind of make pizzas. Yeah, this guy's an

asshole. He's been charged with aggravated battery as well and he is waiting for arraignment. Do you think he explained this crime to his girlfriend or mom at any point? Like, what are you doing? Oh, I got this real hustle. I put

The guy's 51 What I like about it When you read the article And you read the comments From the owner of Roman's pizza He was most upset That the guy didn't take pride In his own pizza

Yeah It's like you know around here We cook the fucking dough Come on motherfucker I could see that He's gonna be like Catch me if you can Where he takes him under his wing

Right Outside of prison Right Right Right I could use a man like you Just got to learn How to make the pizza

Yeah All right But Am I crazy, though? How easy would that be to figure out? Like, they knew this was going on because they're getting bad. Yelp reviews, they're getting phone calls. They're like, that's on our pizza.

It should have been easy. How hard would it be just to send an employee to a hotel room and have him order the pizza? Yeah, but he knows where he's leaving flyers. Like, he knows the hotel he's leaving the flyers at and then he sits there. Go to a hotel. But you don't know where he's leaving the flyers. There's a lot of hotels. I mean, all South Beach business hotels.

Yeah. Go to the Clevelander and figure it out. Yeah. Just go dance a little bit. All right. Sell drugs. you guys I mean

it's been done via pizza places before the mob did it I mean you know yeah okay before I do this next story I just want to find out has anybody here ever been scuba diving I never have

you've done it I have yep yep okay I never have done it either but this story from Brazil is wild because we talk a lot about on the creep off about how sometimes

it's best just to let a crime happen and be glad you didn't know what happened. Yes. Of course. It's better to not know something happened, right, than knowing the trauma. Yeah, what are you mean? You know, harmless sexual assault, I guess. Yeah. So there's this woman at her gay flight attendant best friend.

They go down to Brazil to go scuba diving. Okay. They are staying at a hotel and the instructor is taking them down to the reef and he's like kind of swimming above them and guiding them. It's like an excursion from the hotel. Right, exactly. So what happened was the friend, the steward, decided to bring a GoPro with him.

And he strapped a GoPro odd. And when he first went down, he had it so he could see the dive. And then he changed it and had it kind of focused on her for a while. Uh-oh. And she was being guided by the gentleman, who was the instructor through all the corals. But what they didn't realize because they weren't paying attention

is that dude had whipped out his dick and was totally jerking off while he was floating this woman Yes, underwater. He is cranking one out in salt water. And the other dude has it on film and neither one of them realized it

for seven years. Oh my God. Until they went back and watched the video. They're like, hey, that's not how you snorkel. Like, he's just cranking it while he's swimming above her.

What the fuck? Oh, no. Like, as a joke or like, like, sexually? As a joke! Well, I think what happened was... It's a good bit. He lives in Brazil, he's not used to seeing hot chicks,

so he was overwhelmed by this. There's hot chicks everywhere. Everyone's jerking off everywhere all the time. Yeah, this lady from Ohio and a big flat white ass, yeah, I'm sure he's really upset. But here's the thing. This is what I get annoyed with with this story.

All right. If you jerk off near someone and they don't catch you, no harm, no father. Yeah, that's true. That's literally the whole point of jerking off near someone He tried out to get caught. Yeah, that's a good point, Carl. I'm kind of with Carl on this because, like I said, he got away with this for seven years.

Could you imagine how confused he was when the police was showed up? He's like, which one? Yeah, which. And I was there's no victim. There's no, if she didn't know what was happening, there's no victim. How was this a cry? He got arrested for that? He should arrest her for revenge porn or something.

Right. Right? While you're watching me jerk off, that's fucked up? Yeah, why do you watch the statute on something like that? I don't know. I'm going to send it to Gino Bisconti. That's the guy who Aaron sent the revenge porn to on stream. Got it.

On stream. And then now. I tried to get Gito on WTP. I'm a friend with him. I tried to get him on WTP yesterday. And he's like, yeah, I'm at a barbecue or something. Oh, man. Tell him to call in now.

That shit was. Check out his naked picture of this lady. I've been sending dudes of everyone I know. But to him did you. Bad, huh? He said, I didn't do too bad, huh? Something like that. Oh, my God. When he's bragging about fucking Kayla, and he's like, oh, yeah, bro. He's such

an, errant imhole, it's such a dweeb. It's the best to word for him. He really is. He talks, like a seventh grader who has never gotten laid, who brags about getting laid. I didn't do too bad, huh? Like, why do you, why do you want to share a picture of a naked woman with a man?

What are you getting? What are you getting out of that? And how, and why is it gay? Mm, you know? You got to look for that. Yeah, you really do. It's always the question you should be asking. Yeah. I'd rather send a dick pick to dick. Check out my God.

Yeah. So here's why they made a big deal out of this seven years later. I'm curious. You didn't figure it out from the article, Carl? So she could sue the hotel. Right. He's an employee or works out of there. They should have vetted them better.

They should have, oh, yeah. So that's the story. That guy is a creep. This is not a great move. But, you know, I'm also not from Brazil. I don't understand their customs. I don't understand the way. Okay.

Let me ask a question. You're in the ocean. Jerk off or shit? What's more embarrassing? Yeah, in the ocean. Because remember like Opie from Opie and Anthony? He used to talk about shitting in the lake or the ocean or whatever. He's all proud of himself.

He would shit in the, but shit flies. So it's going to get all over your back. Oh, it's ridiculous. We got a lake to rinse off. But I would. How are you going to fucking, it's going to go like in every part of your back that you can't reach? You just do a couple spins in the water, you know? Like a duck?

There's a lot of paper there. Like you're going to go like that and dog paddle and shit? I mean, you can, you know, I would say you could just splash around. You know, it'll come off. I would think that shitting would be more embarrassing because it's going to be by accident, you know? Is it? You don't ejaculate by accident. Yeah, never jacked off by accident.

Oh, shit. Yeah. maybe but if I shit in a ocean it's going to be it's going to be out of my control so that's more embarrassing yeah I mean there's worse places to shit but yeah it's more yeah okay so this guy did nothing wrong probably every place

that's the conclusion we've all come no we lost you do we lose them there they're back okay all right last story I have for you guys we're going to go up to Massachusetts and we're going to talk about a police detective

named Matthew Farrell. Farewell, he's 38 years old. Okay. And he's been charged with strangling a pregnant woman to death and then framing her death. Way to bury the lead on that. Strangling.

To death. To death. That's too far. But here's the best part. He's the detective. So he then framed the death as a suicide. Okay. So she, yeah.

Well, put her own hands around her neck. So he's accused of killing 23-year-old Sandra Birchmore in February of 2021 Within weeks of telling him She was pregnant with his child Now, here's the problem He embarked on the sexual relationship with her Which she was just 15 years old

And he was 26 The federal indictment says that Farwell began the relationship When he was an instructor At the Stoughton Police Department's Explorer program which she entered when she was 12 years old. God, I know someone who did this too. Really?

Yeah. Those programs are really dangerous, man. Cops around teenagers. Like, that's the worst. There's going to be a percentage that are there for the wrong reasons. Well, 100% of them. I mean, it's a percentage.

Yeah, this girl is there just to get laid, apparently. That's the problem. That's the problem. Here's my thoughts on this And you guys tell me what you think If you're into fucking underage girls Your pull-out game has to be spot on You can't have a weak pull-out game

Yeah, because they're so wiry You know? Right? Like some old broad It's like, you know, you can sluff her off Like a walrus, right? Sure. But these young ones are gonna lock you in Right? You know, like the baby monkeys That hang onto their mom They're like the death grip

Yeah, well their moms are jumping from tree to tree Yeah, right The old monkey's like, oh, fuck, it is. In my day, before everyone had porn hub on their phones, girls thought that's how you finish sex. Now, of course, they know that it's supposed to finish up their face. But back in the day, these girls, you know, these underage girls are just like, shit. Got you. Got you.

Wee! Right? Trying to get away. Remember that? You'd have to break your dick to get it out of there. Pop. Oh, thank God. Not this time, bitch.

Bob! So Detective Farwell was married with children and the indictment says that he was motivated to kill her to order to prevent her from speaking out about their relationship. He was arrested for this. What does she look? Is she fat?

No. She's cute. Very cute. blonde. Cute blonde girl. Huh. Not anymore. She was... Well, God rest her soul. The 23-year-old was three months pregnant when she was found dead inside of her home in 2021. her death was initially believed to be suicide,

but the family did the smart thing and hired a pathologist themselves. And I would have gotten away with the two, but not for this meddling pathologist. The family that gave a shit. The family that did the smart thing and assumed it was the cop. Right.

So she, I guess he staged it so it looked like she hung herself is what I think he did. Oh, wow. And he told his cop when he's like, yeah, nothing to see you here. They're like, yep, nothing to see here. All right.

oh my god what happened oh no i remember her from the explorer program yeah didn't we know her she was like 15 or something yeah i think so i don't know i'm like pussy who can remember that's what he said i mean i didn't say that that would give him away oh you're right so and he like did he throw his back out like he's pretending to hang her it'd be like you know putting up a christmas tree right you got to make the news in tie imagine a lot of work like just imagine going through it in your mind like oh man i probably made the news too long. Yeah. Like he's got a chair,

that he's kicking the chair out, and then put jackety sacks while you're imagining it. Like, like, da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Like, getting caught on shit. Yeah. It's funny.

It's really astounding that they didn't pick up on the fact that it was like a hands that strangled this woman and not a rope. Like, it's very simple stuff. So there's probably a cover up there. Yeah, they're covering up a murder. Yeah. So he was a cop for about a decade.

she told family members before this Oh, oh, is that? I think he's playing something. I think Carl was not going to do it. No, he can't hear it. Oh, shit, no. Oh, okay.

I tried, I tried. It blew out my ears. Thanks, Carl. No problem. So she told her family that he became violent when she revealed she was pregnant with his child,

as one does. At one point, while she was pregnant, he allegedly held Turchmore at a headlock and told her that he wished she were dead. So, you know, he wasn't being very loving about the good news.

You can say that. You know what? I like honesty in a relationship though. Yeah. He didn't wish that she was dead. I mean, I'm going to kill you. That's illegal probably. Probably. You can say, I wish you were dead. Yeah, that's fine. Yeah. Let me ask you guys that's a passive way of looking at it. I do. It was way more romantic. He pointed at a falling

star. Put her in the head like it said, I wish you were dead. Well, okay, let me ask you guys this. So he started banging her when she was 15. Uh-huh. But then stayed with her until she became an adult. Does that make it better? Yeah, I think it does, right?

That's what the Karan says. If you were just into 15, like, let's say he dumped her and he got another 15-year-old. He'd be like, oh, this guy's a great. That'd be a problem. Got long in the tooth at 17, right? Yeah. Then he's a menace. You make a good point.

I would much rather my family loved one died by someone. They were in a relationship, but then just a one-and-done. Right. I would think so too I revealed on the creep off to Vinny and I'd forgotten about this I was in high school I was in a band and I was 16 my girlfriend was 15

and then the singer my band was 20 yeah and my girlfriend started fucking the singer of my band he was 20 she was 15 and he's like that's really fucked up like oh yeah you're right that was that is really fucked up

did that fuck up the band did I quit the band did it yeah did it fuck up the band No, no, he wrote a song about her too And I had to play guitar on it Oh, Coral! Oh, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. You, you,

Whoa, you didn't tell me that point. I got to find the song. My brother had it somewhere. Were you crying while you're playing the guitar? Like, uh, the lyric goes, they say, I'm too old,

fuck them, I don't care. It doesn't change the way I'm real. I swear to get it. And I didn't realize it at first. He brought the sign to the band of a dance school song. And then about it. like, oh, wait, this is about my girlfriend.

It's about statutory rape, Carl. What do you? I got to find that song. Oh, my God. Where's this guy? I don't know. Probably, he used to work in a liquor store. He's probably around.

I got to know how he turned out. He's a cop now. He works with troubled teens. Yeah, right? Probably. You were in a band playing guitar at like 16 with a 20-year-old singer. Yeah, my buddy Nick is older brothers. So we used to go to like frat parties and play like,

Howard shows all the time and shit. And I was like, nice school. I'll make sure you bring some girls from your, from your junior high class with you at our frat party, right? Hey, is your girlfriend going to bring her friends with her? I'm like, no.

Why? What do you mean? Okay. Do you remember the whole song? I remember parts of it. I got to fight. I haven't. Did you have AI fill in the rest?

Probably. I think this song was called Carl, Dry Your Eyes. That's the title of it. What's the most emasculating chord progression, Sean? That you could have someone. You might as. Yeah. C to a G to an A.

Girl, you're playing the little guitar on this one. Yeah. The rhythm guitar. With out the mandolin. Holy shit, I can't even look at you right now. Wow. I know. I keep forgetting about that.

Such a weird thing to have that. You played guitar in the song. Hey, dude, I don't want to do this song. Oh, no. I think he fucked my brother's ex-wife, too. I think he was just. trying to bang all of our girlfriends. Maybe that's actually, that's fine.

Clearly, he just had writers block. Like, I mean, you should, yeah. You're looking for material. Got to write what you know. He could write a song if it wasn't fucking everybody's girlfriend all the time. He wrote some good size. I got to give it to him. He was pretty good.

He's not only Billy Corgan. He did a very good Billy Corgan impression. I'm old. What was the lyric? I'm old, but I could still, I'm older, but I could still. He said, they say I'm too old, but fuck them. I don't care. It doesn't change the way I feel.

is the weird so he's been he's been telling people about this because like hey they say it's like dude that's

that's a rape dude like that's a oh they I'm too old but I mean who's they my best friend

the police right right yeah wow I'm just picturing Billy Corgan working in a liquor

stuff oh god that's the guy that's him good stuff I'm picturing Jimmy Seville singing that's

oh boy it'd be snappier if he did it Gary Glitter would do a better job with it they say I'm too old to fuck

Carl's girlfriend what do they know Dick yeah what do they know wow okay well thanks for the thanks for the bombshell of course

guys they always have a creep hidden you know they always they show you the creeps and you're like I know you guys got some creeps in the tank

back there right then Carl goes so many I forgot about it yeah it's a show and tell segment

from me Thanks for having us on. I got to tell you guys, we did inducted Maddox into the Creepoff Hall of Fame. Recently, that's on our Patreon. Patreon.com slash The Creepoff. And people are very much enjoying that.

I've been loving your bonus shows going through the documentary. We had Tab Bert on our show because he fills in the blanks like nobody. Oh, he's great. He's amazing. Oh, yeah, he's amazing. So I didn't know the story at all, Dick.

Like I really didn't know much about it. So I'm learning and we're going to be doing part two of this. So I did this post and the things we're going to be talking about, something about an RSS feed. Oh, yeah. Writing letters to people's mothers. Yep. And things like that.

So I'm really excited for part two. I can't wait to hear this. I'll never forget when Dick realized he still had control over the big, best debate in the universe RSS feed. Yeah. And he put in a little intro like, why do you guys listen to the show? This guy's a loser.

blah blah blah. That went out on Maddox's feed of a podcast. I heard it live when it happened. It was amazing. I remember going to go on WTP and going, this is the greatest move by a podcast. Yeah, my only regret on that is not having Sean's reaction on video. When I said, hey, will you wait around? I'm going to kill the feed and I'm going to record something. I record something real quick. And then I just, I started saying that what ended up getting tagged on to his feed without telling Sean what it was or what it was for. And your face was like, you were like, you're like, wait a minute, this is like, oh my, you, you had, this is, I know where this is going. It was like pure elation and like a child. Well, because I, you would never think that opportunity would. Like a young, like a 15 year old girl seeing a cop's penis for the first time.

Speechless. Oh, yeah. I remember my first cop penis very well. I'm getting it a. Yeah. Yeah, that was really good. I was sitting on that forever, too. I know.

You said that afterwards. It's like a year and a half. I can't believe that that happened. The opportunity was there. That was a good one. Talk about not keeping your own house in order, you know? Similarities. Maddo banning the Titanic song.

Vito banning the team guy Vito song. It's like, it rhymes. You see what these things are, you know? Is Vito the next Maddox right now? Is that what happening? We're trying to bring him back. We're trying to reel him back from the edge. You're going to need those hoists that we talked about earlier.

Yeah. It's like Jurassic Park when they're trying to pull the RV. Jurassic Park, too. You know, and they're trying to pull the RV back and the guys in the Jeep like, oh, trying to pull it back on it. Oh, shit, right? That's what we're trying to do right now. But he's just really trying to launch himself off the edge.

Like, Vito, it's, trust me, all you have to do is show up. so dick it might be you there's a common denominator here oh yes yes yes it's definitely me pushing people beyond their ability to cope with

comfort zone comfort zones yeah comfort zones don't exist in here that's because we're doing an entertainment product we're not doing a therapy show in here there is

he just has to say stop making fun of me it hurts my feelings And people stop That's the worst No, that's the worst That's the worst thing you can possibly say You know what?

The problem with being fat Is that your skin does get thinner It has to stretch out Over all the mass of your body What do you think you should do? I think you should fucking grow up And grow up and grow a pair And stop being offended by shit

No Well, the cat's already out of the bag though That's the problem here You should quit the internet Oh no Well he's been called a pedophile He, Vito's jokes About I'm a pedophile

I'm gonna fuck kids Like to fuck with people Yeah Has caused all of us To get called a pedophile For like four years Oh me too I've had veto on my show

And I'm a petto-apologian You're a pedophile You're a pedophile Like people quit People quit the show Quit my Discord They sit on Kiwi Farms all day And call me a pedophile

Because of Vito's jokes Huh So it's like Yeah I mean man You're just kind of like, you can't just say not these jokes. Like, you can't say, well, these are not

okay because they're making fun of me. Like, we're all taking, we're all taking shots here. Can people tone it down? Yeah, sure, but they're not going to if you say the reason is because what they're doing is beneath you and not funny, because it is fucking funny because you're getting this off. If you're going to be an edsword, you've got to be able to take

the backlash. Like, Nick Fuentes is in crying on the internet about people not liking him. Nick Ricada reads superchats that I wouldn't even read. And like, Jesus Christ, about his wife and his kids. I'm like, oh, my fucking God, I wouldn't read that shit. Woo-hoo. And these guys are just like, oink, oink.

He's like, that's bullshit. Like, okay. Are you sure this isn't because super, yeah, exactly. Are you sure this isn't because super killers laid and you're just kind of like, you know, well, freaked out. Yeah. And something in your mind's having to become real. and it's kind of gets, like, things get uglier when they become more real.

Yes, they do. You know, fantasy relationships turn into real relationships, which are gross. Yeah. There have been guys, like Johnny Mansell is a great example of this. Guys get their payday, and then they just phone it in, they don't care anymore. And they're like, I got $8 million to the bank. I don't need to play NFL. I don't give a shit.

Yeah. And he was already rich. Yeah. Right. No, he wasn't. He got money from signing autographs. No, he came from a lot of money. No, he made that up.

That was a news story. They planned it. You got to watch the documentary. No, that's right. It's hilarious. He made that up. No, I'm sure he knows. Really, because it was being reported like for years that his parents had money.

Yeah. I mean, not, maybe not him in particular. They're lying to you all the time. They don't know what the people are talking about. Oh, my God. Did you see the Zuckerberg's like confession? Yeah. That's the weirdest.

What's that all about? You didn't see. That? No. Oh, fuck. Zuckerberg, I could read his letter, but it was basically, Zuckerberg is saying that we Facebook got duped into shutting down the Hunter Biden laptop story and COVID shit. He said that the government was, and he's framed it in like a really aggressive way. He's like, people from the government were telling us constantly that this shit is Russian disinfo and that we're like going to kill people with COVID. And our thing at the time, was to trust the government, and we changed our policy so we no longer trust the government. Like, now we do our own research. Look, well, they should always be doing that. But that's a crazy admission, because 10% of people said they would have voted differently if they knew about the Hunter Biden laptop shit.

Like a ton of people were like, oh, there's criminality there? Oh, yeah, I wouldn't have voted for that then. Yeah, yeah. It was a crazy letter, especially right now, like leading right into the, like, what did you guys, did you guys see that? Yeah, just came out. I did. It came on the heels of the telegram guy getting arrested and Elon Musk coming out and saying like, yeah, no, we're just, it's free speech. What are we doing? We can't listen to government agencies. So then finally Zuckerberg's like, I don't think Kamala is going to get a lie to. Maybe I should get on the right side of things. Yeah. I want to go to jail. Right. Yeah. Yeah. God, that's, that's, that's, I forgot about the telegram guy too. Okay, anyway, you guys got any live shows lined up or anything like that?

We do. We're going to be in Ferndale, Michigan, just outside of Detroit. Really? October 25th at the Magic Bag. You can go to WATP Live.com for tickets to that. It's almost sold out. Yep. And we're still a couple months out.

So that's going to sell out very quickly. Please, if you want to come hang with us, that's always a fun show. It's our third year in a row with the Magic Bag. It'll be our third sell out. It'll be our first Steeltober Fest. Yeah, Steal Tober. Really? Oh.

If they're making fun of Aaron Imhold. Oh, that's the, okay. I'm in on the Aaron stuff now. No, I get it. I'm going to help. I'm going to make it like a personal mission to help Ralph with his letter writing campaign. Did you guys hear about that? You're going to adopt it.

It may tell that guy's a stoolie. When you were talking about that, like, that's the funniest thing you throw else ever done. For sure. It's amazing. Yeah, but he called. Ralph a pig. See, that's how Ralph handles getting called a pig.

I'm going to write everyone at your jail and say that you're, that you snitched on the felony drug crime. Vito just has to think bigger you're saying. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, God. Yeah. Okay. I don't know. Do we have anything? Did you see me out with destiny?

I have not seen that. I can only imagine how difficult that was to deal with those people for four hours. Dick. I'll have to check that out. You know, it's interesting. Interesting. This audience writes in with advice questions. Like, how do I fuck this? How do I cheat on my wife? How do I, is it okay if I fuck this fat shit? How do I stop looking at my girlfriend's sister's tits at the dinner table all the time? Yeah. So Destiny starts his advice part of his show. And these guys calling in, they're like, I can't seem to do anything. How do I organize my time so that I can do my homework? And I didn't graduate college. How do I become a doctor like house? I'm like, what? What kind of? What are these guys? What kind of questions in these? Is this like a TED Talk?

What are you talking about? I'm unfamiliar with this line of questioning. It sounds like Stefan Molino's show in a reverse universe or something. Yeah, it was like a reverse universe. Like, man. Yeah, I guess that's a good question for Destiny. I was like, well, just stop jacking off until you do all your work. It seems pretty obvious.

Well, but other than that. Other than that. Did anyone ask about like IQs based on continents that people live on or anything like that or wasn't about that? No. No, that didn't come up, strangely. Fair enough. So, did you win the conversation, Dick? Yeah, I think so, because I think the win is just to wind them up.

Like, you just give in to everything. And then, like, a guy from the Ukraine called in to tell me I'm an asshole. And then everybody was telling me that all the things I think about. Ukraine are all lies and like there's no that all the separatism in Ukraine in Lou Hans and Donbask was all just Putin paying people to pretend to want to be back in Russia and that there's never been any kind of separatist genuine separatist movement which I believe is you know totally insane like if Texas said I want to be separate from the US I'd say yeah that's yeah there's a percentage of people yeah California has been saying it too

at one time everybody you know we had a whole civil war based on it that wasn't like fake right so I said like it could still happen I said okay like let's say that's true yeah like okay let's say it's true let's say that's true that let's say it's true and they're like well I'm like well you got your you're forcing got you're conscripting guys at gunpoint to like go fight your thing and they're like no everyone wants to fight like okay then what else do you want they're like well we need weapons I said no yeah no right you don't get any yeah okay well now we know your position moving on I'm like all right fine we finally found yeah you got everything you want

What else do you want? Weapons? No. Yeah. Oh, damn it. Everything else is just like a trick. I don't know. The country, and we talked about this on a bonus crossover show, the country most Ukrainians have fled to who have left the country is Russia. Yeah, of course. They speak Russian. Yeah. They remember the Soviet Union.

My grandparents were from the Ukraine. Yeah. Right. And Carl, that is true, but that's not quite the whole story. And you're getting Ukraine says they're being taken by Russia. at gunpoint saying come with us or die here Russia is saying we're taking everybody to Ukraine because it's a humanitarian mission like so it's like well that's obviously lie

but I mean they're but what I'm saying is most people are going to Russia because the alternate like they're they're not all going I can't wait to get back to Russia they're like this is where it's going to be safe yeah I understand that but there's also they live with a bunch of Nazis and they and of course they speak Russian so it's like what's easiest thing, yeah. And it's like, but Russia's also told them they can go to like three different countries, but apparently nobody's going there. I don't know, but it's like, yes, yes, of course. I mean, you're getting bombed for years. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just don't believe that when the

USSR collapsed, everyone was like, ah, Ukraine, we love it here. Like, no, I think that happened. Yeah, yeah, probably not. Who figured out where this line was? Like, I don't, I mean, I know how the South works. They're still like, it's like, nah, we've been living here for a long time. that rock over there that's actually our rock not yours if you touch it we'll kill you isn't it odd that if you go to the south

there's more American flags than anywhere else and that was the one place that I wanted out of America yeah yeah now they're all in on it it's weird how that is transpired over the last I never thought about that it's true that's true okay guys go have a good Sunday

thanks for calling in you as well thanks dick the creepoff dot com we promise we won't block you Yes, we don't block deep on the creep off. Watch us every Monday at 1 p.m. Eastern, except for this Monday because it's Labor Day. Can they call you a club foot and stuff and like your teeth are messed up? Don't even go there.

That's where I get very upset. Pre-block. Wait, look at what somebody sent in. I'd have somebody sent this in. Yeah. To go in Vito's booty. I was like, I can't. I can't do it.

Really? There's a line that you. I, you would not believe the filter that I have. Okay. He's getting something now. All right. So Vito gets these toys that he has to get by weighing himself.

He doesn't weigh himself. He doesn't get the toys. This guy broke. Well, he gets the toys smashed if he doesn't get on the scale. So it, yeah. Very much an adult, this guy. Why doesn't he get on the scale? This was the, this was the,

this was the guy. Oh, God. Oh, no. It's dozens of pigs. dozens of little pigs I can't that's hilarious wait so

are fat jokes funny or not exactly what is this is this funny we're laughing I'm laughing I can't that's too much

yeah okay all right see you guys see you guys see you thanks again I'm going to go ahead.

I'm going to come. ...you know... ...and...