The Creep Off - Episode 4: Detroit Hangover Edition

Episode Date: September 18, 2023

Karl & Vinnie are hungover and back in the studio for a scum stream! This week we meet the late Lewd Skywalker, the creepiest sommelier of all time and a man who absolutely nailed murdering his wife. Check out all the stories here: 2 Men Enroll in High School Using Falsified Documents – Crime Online  Man Pleads To AK-47 Threat Over Pizza Pie | The Smoking GunJohn Stevens, Luke Skywalker impersonator dies, coroner report shows (cincinnati.com)Police: 2 women tossed baby back and forth in Volusia County (wesh.com)Registered sex offender Austin Powers lures Largo teen away from home after meeting her on Snapchat: LPD (fox13news.com)Zimbabwean man reports gay partner to police - Bulawayo24 NewsCypress man sentenced to 40 years for beating wife to death with nail gun (click2houston.com)EXCLUSIVE: Sadistic sommelier Ian Ranney was in a three-way relationship with a married couple and would openly 'torment' the man's traumatized wife | Daily Mail OnlineWant to support the show? Find us on Patreon, Supercast & Backed.by to get exclusive merch and an extra bonus episode every week! 

I'm reading the chat here. What are they saying? Oh, they're late. Do you people expect us to be on time for the hangover episode? I actually have an excuse for why I showed up a little bit late today, Vinny. The dog chewed your feet up? No. Okay, what?

Now, do you remember what happened at our live show in Detroit at the Great Magic Bag? When I hadn't eaten any food all day and I just asked the guy before the meet and greet, can you please make sure there's pizza in the green room? at 7.50, so I can eat that between 7.50 and 8.30 when the show starts. Oh, I recall. And the guy said to me, he goes, no problem. And this guy's great. He can get shit done. And when did the pizza arrive, Vinny? Right on time for my purposes. 845. I was already on stage doing a show at that point. And people who weren't even involved in the show got to eat pizza, not me. Well, today, I'm prepping. I'm all ready to go. I go, let me get some Chinese food from

Grubhub. And I do this before noon. It says it'll be arriving at 12, 25. excellent don't i get the note um something went wrong with your order it's going to be late i'm like are you fucking kidding me so it showed up just as i was about to leave and i had to eat some food before i came here buddy i'm sure you can relate to that well carl i think that you put on a masterful show in detroit thank you buddy i thought you did a great job you're an fantastic live show host uh and you did it on an empty stomach why you're trying to sabotage this show by eating what the fuck good point i i need to be hungrier yeah i guess we'll just start the show and uh let's do a scum stream let's do it or something what are we doing again

scum stream you're listening to the carl network warning listening to the creep off might leave you triggered this episode may contain murder rape laughing of murder and rape abelism many dixtras serial keaters smile talking fat shaming child abuse drug abuse pizza abuse victim blaming I'm the state of Florida. I'm going to give the people what they want. Sensation. Horror, shock.

I'm going to deliver the goods, because I'm alive, and I'm not backing down. Cuckoo, cuckoo! Excelliore, true believers. Ola Creepos, welcome to another edition of your favorite true crime podcast, the show that is incredibly hungover from a trip to Detroit. I'm your host. My name is Vinnie and joining me in studio, as always. It's hot cucka, carla.

What is happening, Vinnie Paulino? I'm glad that we're doing the show today, buddy. I wasn't sure if we were going to. but here we are doing a special scum stream edition of the creep off at our regular time when we should normally be putting it in a ton of work look at us but here's a fun fact all of our scum stream stories have been piling up this last month we didn't do a lot of scum streams so i got some fun ones and i said oh man there's so much so many good things i don't want them to age out i want to get to them and then also carl you won last week and i don't want to acknowledge it i don't feel like having a contest with you i'm too tired we don't have to that's fine i just i couldn't believe leave you didn't want to do the show today when I found out your in-laws are staying with you I just thought like bitty's you don't want to do like a 24-hour marathon or something we can pretend it's a consequence i don't know yeah subreddit surfing's going late tonight folks i bet holy shit you got to do a lot of prep for that show probably to be in the studio all day

i would imagine oh my god i had so much to do i got so much to do you know it's going to be the first episode with our uh of the be the subreddit surfing producer contest oh that's exciting yeah So he picked a really interesting subreddit. It's a conspiracy theory. So tonight we're learning about a conspiracy that I had never heard of. Oh, I bet I know what it is. What is it? Layed on me.

Opie was telling me about this. Traffic circles are actually causing tornadoes. No. That's not what it is. No. I'm not going to tell you what it is. You're going to have to tune in tonight at 8 o'clock on subreddit. Oh, come on.

Tease the stupid conspiracy theory. Carl. Come on, Vinny. Come on. buildings are not what you think they are oh so this isn't the birds are fake theory this is the buildings are real but they're not what we think they are what do we think they are buildings that we made uh-huh are they spaceships no but maybe we didn't make them this is the worst okay whatever i was just watching a building getting built in downtown detroit when i was at the baseball game last week

yeah no those are ones we're building we definitely make buildings we definitely do there's like That's how I'm saying. I'm going to hit some super chats. I'm going to do some stories here. Yeah, it's going to be a fun episode today. It has got some great stories. Oh. And we're feeling relaxed.

This is going to be kind of a loose show. We're just going to have fun, interact with the chat. It is a super chat Monday. I thought it wasn't. And then I looked at my calendar this morning and lo and behold, Super Chat Monday. So let's celebrate. Celebrate together. Well, Uncle Sammy Pooh started the festivities today with $4.99.

He says, in before Carla brings up his frozen peaches in the age of consent in New York for some reason. Funny. Do I bring that up too much? Yeah. I might bring it up too much. It is 17. I do bring it up too much. Well, it's a fun fact to know. It's the only fun fact Carl cares about in fact. Correct. It is fun. Hunter Duke. Thanks for the 499. Thank you guys for an amazing show Friday. You're welcome. Yeah, that was a fun time. And by the way, anyone, obviously, we put out the

entire live show, WATP live show in Detroit, as our regular episode. It's episode 445, live in Detroit part two. But if you're on our Patreon or Supercast or if you're a YouTube member, I've also put out the entire video of the entire show with synced up with the great audio from the board. The audio's never been better for a live show. Very happy with that. They did a very nice job.

And we have a three camera shoot the entire video. So if you want to see all of the different goings-ons, I crammed seven segments into one stupid live show. So there's a lot to get to. Tuki was there. Cardiff Electric was there. obviously Eric Zane the Drew and Mike folks

Vinny trucker Andy Bruce or Chris it was a blast well I just want to say thank you again for having this match his bag Ray DeVito was there thank you for bringing up Ray hung out with Ray after the show for a while I got to chat with him about our buddy we got to talk about Ray I got a video you know hold on before you do that

you started doing the super chats but you relate to the game there's a couple that came in before those two okay well let's hit them all sorry let's just hit those real quick Tiger Lily he says great show via audio left beginning to end can't wait to see it yes that's what i was just talking about yeah it was a great show i had a great time a kinky local two bucks thanks again for a great weekend it was it was cool hanging out with kinky loco too i like kinky yeah me too we're we're all hanging out after the show and uh i got to talk to um i don't know if i'm

allowed to say his name but uh el hurribley minus the uh l and the horribly what about did he still have the b and the dabbler i think so him and Cardiff and a whole bunch of us were all hanging out after the show and it was interesting to hear their backstories to know them a little better it was interesting there was a lot of people there it was a very funny evening for all and uh one of the things that our buddy el hariblay did was he running around talking to people in the line yes during the show yes he was no he was uh i think he did like an hour long uh live stream from the meet and greet slash pre show then he dragged Ray DeVito around to meet people in the line and see if they knew who he was,

which they did not. I heard about that. I haven't seen that yet. Poor Ray. Now, one of my favorite creepos, and this is why I am the worst, for the life of me, I cannot remember her first name. But she's very nice. She came to the live show in Ferndale last year.

She was there this year. I met her. Really nice lady. Okay. really wonderful fun funny nice lady well well we saw that guy last week sorry guys that's Wayne Cody I'm going to show you this video from the line that was tweeted at me by Franklin Sheckler okay and uh it captured one of our creepos dealing with Ray DeVito who I never really I don't know if raise a creep but this is a weird video and I just thought maybe we should watch

it can you hear that Carl no there's no sound coming through okay perfect so So I fucked this up already. I'm just going to fix it all. I fix that. While you're doing that, I do want to say, speaking of some of our favorite listeners who travel and come out to our live shows,

Brenda. That was starting coming through. Brenda from San Diego did have tickets. She was going to come to the show. And then she had some health thing that came up, nothing serious, but she wasn't able to make it. So I was bummed that we didn't get to hang out with Brenda this time around.

But I'm glad that she's still listening and supporting the show. Okay. here's the video card all right let's check it out real quick this is this is fantastic look at all the people can i ask you a question fantastic i'm el hariblay the world's greatest ventriloquist i just wanted to ask you who are you waiting he asked permission to interviewer let's get lit fantastic who we most excited to see tonight finnie that's one she's happy and comfortable all he now she's horrified recoiling into her he's touching her hates it oh she hates it look at it she doesn't know your name ray whoever made this video don't touch the audience ray leave our creepos alone right yes ray come on what is this oh no

what was he doing that's a great video who put that together for you uh french franklin schekler nice job franklin i i watched that 50 times going gray is an awkward motherfucker why is he grabbing her he's a little awkward listen forgive me girl with rose and hair yeah i thank you for always you're you're great i just i felt so bad for you watching this video i was like what the fuck and and i'm just joking ray's a good guy he's he really is he's a sweetheart of a guy he's not creepy he don't have to worry about him he doesn't even like sex so you don't have to worry about him creeping on you i'm not convinced um not mark thanks for the five bucks says amazing charles friday can't wait for more of the osborne's podcast oh my gosh that had some pops in it didn't it

the uh i think eric zane put together some great clips and uh dr steve for that section of it and uh holy shit kelly osborne got all of auss's looks and none of his talent not poor poor girl she's on that show with jamie fox carl did you know that what show it's a game show okay it's like a name that tune kind of game show i didn't know that no i think it's beat shazam is the name okay i've heard of that i didn't know kelly was on there she sucks she's awful but she looks exactly like ozie did in 1978 and it's scary as fuck she has so crazy she had the blonde teased hair well it's it's blue but it's like exactly the same hairstyle she does her makeup the same as azi used to do it she makes all the same facial expressions she's the princess of darkness

oh man it's not good all right well ray you creeped out our listeners stop it and we'll keep on moving you're ready to talk about some creeps car i i do like the do you know who ray devedo is uh contest or segment maybe we could bring that back for future shows. Just bring Ray around as if anyone knows who he is. That's fun. I don't think he'd like that very much. No, all right.

Never mind. I got to be honest. I don't think he'd be a fan. Well, because, listen, no one knows who any of us are. The only real celebrity in the dabbler versus the dabbler himself, sitting John Melendez live at the comedy to Carls in March 10th,

2024. And the big question everyone wants to know, I mean, tickets are selling, obviously. People are buying tickets for this thing. It very well might sell out. So we've got to get on those tickets. You'll be shocked. I'm not giving out numbers

because I'm just not going to do that I don't have permission to. But there's a lot of meeting and greets gone. Oh, no shit. People do want They do want to meet the stink finger for themselves, huh? I have a feeling the meet and greets will be gone with, you know,

before Thanksgiving. Okay. Anyway, but the shows at six months, I know. That's where I was going with this thing. We should have some type of a side bet. I'm not going to do anything to affect anything. basically there should be something to the side bet whether this will actually happen or not because you booked it so far out in advance it just seems like there's so much turmoil with

centering john and relationships and whatnot you know carl i would make a bet with you on this if you'd like to okay because i know my buddy john's not going to fuck me over i know he promised me because in fact he told me today so what are you fucking laughing at john told me today he's not going to i hate you i will never turn on you unless you turn on me first this is when he says everyone that was very close to what he wrote that was very something about first blood i know that there's something about first blood jod hilarious john did tell me though you know we both want this show to happen i know that a lot of good can come from it i think a lot of people are going to have a lot of fun and i'm also going to make an announcement about the night before very soon

uh we're going to have something interesting going on in the rickles room for uh fans of the dabble that might be coming. Am I a part of this thing? I haven't heard about this. I don't think, no, probably not. Oh, you're probably not invited. See, I wanted to do a creep-off thing. I was thinking maybe we could do a live creep-off.

I would be a part of that, I would hope. Well, yeah, you would be a part of that. That I decided subreddit surfing's never had a live show. Okay, I got you. Cardiff will be in town. I understand. Yeah, so I'm thinking we might do something like that. Dude, do you know that I hung out with Cardiff for hours at a tailgate party this past weekend?

Do you know that I sat next to Cardiff in a Michigan Wolverines game? Yeah, you're actually, you had the same seats. That's right. I was up in the fancy pants seats, but you guys are down with the people. Every single person around us was wildly uncomfortable. Well, I mean, those are those seats are small. They pack people into that place. And between you and Cardiff, you guys are, I would say big and tall.

You guys could be the two spokesmen for that's our tag team name. Big and tall. Guys, we were sitting there. You know what? I realized what I absolutely love. about that man who's laughed at andy sit in i'm just curious mine okay my andy's my little black rose said right about i'm sorry what we're gonna say buddy uh what i absolutely love about cardiff is the sense of awe it's that Canadian uh Minnesota Minnesota

Minnesota you know like border because he's up there yeah right it's that type of it's the accent it's that weird accent mm-hmm right mixed with like that Minnesota going to the big city for the first time. Yes. Like I imagine it was like the first time he went to the twin cities, Minneapolis, St. Paul. Sure. You know.

Yep. I feel like it was like that. And his wife was a sweetheart. Um, she definitely sounds like I know she wasn't, but it sounds like she grew up just outside of Toronto. Sounds very much like that the way she talked to her accent. No.

But Rochester, Minnesota. Right. No, I know. At this game. I'm sitting next to Cardiff. Yeah.

And he's just like this. Wow. He was just to there like. there's a hundred and three thousand people are there yeah but the look of childlike amazement and he looks at me goes wow i feel like i'm watching a movie this is amazing oh that's great i'm just like yeah buddy i'm so happy for you well so mark fellhauer came up he's the guy i got my tickets from from the drew and mike show he came up to check on me and and say hi during the game he's like what do you think about the stadium

i'm like this is amazing these videos screens they have on either end zone are fucking huge they look amazing and I guess all the Michigan fans are not that thrilled with it. They don't think it's that great. I was like, well, then I guess my expectations are too low because I was impressed. They had all these new lights in the stadium. So they have all these different colored lights that are happening and they're oscillating. I'm like, this is fucking cool. And I guess the Michigan fans are just like, whatever.

I thought is neat. I did have a side bet with Cardiff, though, who was dumber about football? The two children sitting behind us or Andy? Let me guess. at one point right these two kids were so stupid they were they were the type of annoying kid where the dad has already learned to tune them out oh i hate that so they would just be sitting there going dad is it this this this this isn't half time yet is it half time yet is it half time yet and they'd have to say 15 times before he would acknowledge them yeah i wanted to punch this man

in the face that's a creep move folks this is the creep up acknowledge your fucking kids when when you're on the airplane when you're in a stadium you might be used to your fucking rat. I am not. Get him under control, asshole. I'm not mad at your kids. I'm mad at you. And I'm also mad at the kids. Yeah. I'm mad at everyone. Usually they say kids are off limits. Not right now. Let me tell you how stupid one of them was, Carl. Let me tell you how fucking dub this kid was. They had honorary captains for the game, if you recall. One of the honorary captains that ran out with the players was the female, was a female member of the House of Representatives, I believe Lisa McLean was her name. Oh, and by the way,

Whenever I see a politician a sporting bout, I'm like, yeah, woo. Lisa, Lisa, Lisa. That fucking hate that shit. So she goes out with the team to midfield to go flip the coin. And this stupid kid, because she's wearing a number nine, who I guess is the quarterback, he's what she's wearing a number nine. He goes, oh, there's number nine. It's the quarterback.

That would be bad for Michigan. And then he starts going, that's the quarterback, right, dad? That's the quarterback, right, dad? I'm waiting for this kid to, like, figure this out. And then the father finally acknowledges this little dummy and goes, uh, no, that's representative Lisa McLean. Five seconds later. No, I think that's the quarterback.

No, but I just checked my program. Number nine, that's the quarterback of this team. I'm sorry. And then Andy was sitting there like, oh, that's a quarterback. No, you're fucking idiot. Stupid Andy. Stupid Andy. Let's go drive a truck.

Go drive a truck, would you just stop trying to pretend to like sports. All right, let's get caught up on Super Chats And we've got to start the scum stream We're just having fun We're being a little too loose all of a sudden I didn't realize that was going to happen Okay Yeah, so Dang Lizard was five euros

You know what, Dang Lizard You are all over the place I don't know how you have the time for it I see them all over Shully's show in the morning He's on our shows in the afternoon Evening time doesn't matter He's always there

Here comes the money Thanks for the super chat Dang Lizard is another other hero supporting the show that would also help feed Carl's cat in Florida. Two unrelated sentences. Over a half a million people go missing in the U.S. every year. Ray is not innocent. No comment.

No comment. Oh, man. Just two random sentences. De La, thanks, Dana. Vote Carl, vote Dylan. Oh, he wants Dylan to win the producer contest. Well, down from somewhere is up next week. This week, it's Jimmy the lip baby who's hanging out in the chat somewhere.

Jimmy the lip is here. He's the man. I like this pick. Buildings, folks. All right. Yeah, I'm interested. I'll be tuned in if I'm not watching football or band practice. And then Uncle Sammy for five bucks.

The only way Ray is going to get a woman to touch him is with a taser. Boom! I found out I could do a pretty good Ray DeVito imitation. Oh, I can't wait to hear it. Oh, my God. Everybody, how you doing? I'm Ray DeVito. is Ray here

How you doing, Carl It's me, Ray DeVito Ray, right, right on the phone What's up, Ray? Good to see you this past weekend Oh yeah, I'm glad to be here today I brought Airy Jane with me You think you get her in two?

Boom! Oh God Should we address? I like Eric, she's nice. Can we, I just want to, you just reminded me of the most annoying thing about the live show I almost lost my fucking mind

during the meet and greet because nobody read the website that said These VIP tickets will not get you into the main event. They are sold separately. And guess what? Dozens of people didn't know that. And guess whose problem that became my problem?

It became my fucking problem as I'm trying to go around, take pictures, sign posters. How great is the poster, by the way. Fucking Troy Smith killing it. Troy Smith is amazing. In fact, I added a few Troy Smith stickers to the back behind you there. Yes. Our ICP ones are fantastic. The TCO ones.

to creep off like NWO style ones there's a Tookie world order but the TCO was around before that just so everybody knows Oh what was it before that The TCO? Well it's the TWO Well he's got the TWO but we've been TCO We've had that for a while got you

We've been doing that thing sometimes somewhere It's our trademark See syn to sysm fair enough pop it Boom I like it so much A good stickers All right let's hit let's hit these Real quick couple

of Super Chats came in and then we got to start our scumstreet No way, I guess it was just the one that came in then Yeah, here we go. Daywell, again, Vinnie likes Adidas because Nike doesn't make XXXL. Oh God, Vinnie bought a sweatshirt. Everything, there's so many stories.

There's so many things you remind me of. So when we get to the Michigan game, this tailgate party is fucking awesome. There's a chef there. There's unlimited booze and beer and we're right next to the stadium. It's a perfect day. So we all go for walks and buy Michigan gear.

You know, we're like, all right. Yeah, we're joining the cult. And Vinny goes off and he goes off on his own to find a sweatshirt. And Vinny, how many X's was this sweatshirt that you purchased? It was big and baggy on you, my friend. I'm pretty sure it was made from the tarp they used to cover the field. Yes. That's all I'm going to tell you.

Yeah. Mind your business on the X's, Bafangulo. Um, you ready for some. Let's have a contest. How many axes do you think Vinny's Michigan sweatshirt was? We'll put a poll up on the creepoff. you get guess of the chat but uh each guess is going to cost you five bucks all right sounds good all right and the winner gets accolades if if we could get the hype trade up to a thousand

dollars before the end of the show i'll tell you how many exits you should start doing that that's everyone loves that fuck me can you do uh some jingles about that or something probably all right carl i want to introduce you to two guys in texas here they are this is uh I want a scum stream with Carol and Vinny. I need a scum stream with grieves tonight. I want a scum stream with carol and vina. Gotta help some panels with people who just ain't right. I need a scum stream.

I want a scum stream. I need a scum stream. I need a scum stream. Let's start off in Texas I'd like to introduce you to these two fine young men Tristan Moses 20 and Kierre Trenton 19 Carl, why are we talking about that? I don't know, they skip class or something.

They look at the kind of kids who probably should be in school and they didn't show up. Those look like children, do you? Yeah, don't they? They look like a couple high schoolers that maybe should be in class. No, they do not look like that, Carl. They look like they should be at home.

room right reporting in for the day i'm pretty sure the one on the right with the dreads is the guy who checked my id at fifth avenue the other night these two men were arrested last week for allegedly enrolling in high school using fake IDs and documents well good for them a lot of kids aren't even going to school anymore these guys are going there where they're not supposed to that's amazing why the fuck were these guys enrolled in high school carl it was not to better themselves the article says it's not immediately known while though I'm pretty sure it wasn't because they want another crack in calculus. I have a feeling it's because 17 to 8 year old girls are hot.

Yeah, might be that. Yeah. Might be a great place to sell stuff. You can do lots of fun things if you're just, high school is a good time. You don't have to go to class. Yeah. How did they fucking think?

Like this one guy has got to go tea, Carl. Hold on a second. They're like 19 and 20, right? They're not that much out of school. When we've been covering stories, people in their 30s enrolling in high school and getting away with it for weeks and months. T's two would have been busted in five seconds.

These two stick out a little bit Get the fuck out of here So I have no idea what that's about If anybody has any guesses, let me know Great comment Yeah, you don't have to be enrolled in school To sell drugs to high school So you can just hang out outside

Those ain't real dude says Millie Vanilly looking rough It's the R Kelly boys Oh no That's not good That's not good At least it wasn't middle school That's where R Kelly's at

It's good point They went to the high school Not the elementary school I don't think they would have passed there either so let's go to Tennessee Carl for a little while let's go to a place in Tennessee where it's probably the best place to get pizza in the state oh yeah yeah it's a little Cesar's dude little Cesar's from Detroit by the way did you have any little Cesar's pizza when you're at the Tigers game on Thursday

Carl they put out a lot of pizza at that place don't they Carl I got to say this yeah I don't give a shit about the Detroit Tigers they're now the greatest team in the right and here's why i'm listening folks drew lane is the greatest man alive yes he's my hero i all i ever wish i could have been would be to grow up to be drew lane he's got a fucking the guy's got it man he's fucking still time buddy there's still time you're a lot younger than him i don't know about that right now i i feel like i'm more on a path to uh a cardboard little caesar's box six feet under the ground than i am i i would agree with that i was just telling you i could turn your life the championship club box where i was

where drew late is yeah so this guy was so generous and kind he gave andy and i a set of tickets to go to his box seats and well let me just correct you real quick i was going to give him to producer chris and lucy type box so they decided they didn't want to go but but you guys were easily my second choice on that i'm not thanking you i'm thinking i know i understand as you should as you should so we go there and like the first thing that that i notice is there is a massive buffet. Shocking, that's what I noticed. And I look over there as a dessert buffet. It's hard not to notice the buffets. And then there's an open bar. Yep. So we go get some drinks. We've got these nice seats with tables in front of us. We're all comfy, cozy up there watching the game in the

shade. It's a beautiful day out. And man, we had plate after plate. We got hot dogs. I had country ham. I had country ham. No, I had that country ham. They have Coney Island dogs there with the chili, the Coney Island chili, I know, I had that too. It's fucking fantastic. You're, you're going to Poundown on food. And then I get up and I'm like, oh, I think I'm going to hit that dessert tray. And I walked back in and they would clean up the buffet, the buffet. But I looked over, Carl, and there was open little Caesar's boxes as far as the eye could see.

Miles of pizza. And listen, Detroit style pizza. Is it the best kind of pizza? No. Is it the worst? No. It's greasy. It's gooey.

It's great. It's fine. It'll work. I'm a fan now of Detroit style pizza. Carl, I thought I died for a minute. He probably did. I thought that those little seizures boxes. Someone was sussitating you on the ground.

You're like, gosh, I feel like I died. Like, sir, you did. I was standing there. Must have been an out of body experience because like I'm watching these things. And the pizza boxes started floating, creating a staircase. And I was just running up them. Just get slow motion. Mouth open towards the pearly gates.

It's hilarious. Oh, my God. Then there was just dessert was pizza. Oh, it was amazing. What a day. So the funniest part was, so these guys go to the baseball game in the afternoon. We're all hanging out Thursday night. And one of the guys from the Drew and Mike show goes, hey, good game to go to these.

You guys, what about that grand slam? And he goes, there wasn't a grand slam. Another. They're most certainly lost. You guys weren't paid attention to the game at all. I saw it. Okay. Sure you did.

Andy's the one who doesn't know anything about sports. It's not me. It's funny. Andy's the one who played sports. He does no shit about him. it's amazing he's not a sports guy yeah technically either so september 12 folks tennessee it's a little caesars uh a man named charles doty's 64 years old he's pled guilty uh to a litany of charges folks four aggravated assault counts uh felony counts of assault

he walked into the Little Caesars and put in an order. Yes. And they were taking a long time for it. Well, Little Cedars, the thing about Little Cesar's is that it's not great pizza, but it's already cooked. Here you go, sir. Five bucks, here you go. Here's your pizza.

That's the only thing about it's fast. Yep. They tell you it takes 10 minutes. But here's the thing. Who are these dumb people that go into a Little Cesar's and try to order like a custom pizza? Oh, yeah, you can't do that. You either get cheese, you get pepperoni. Those are your choices.

Because here's what happens. When you go and you go and you go. you do that now these people are interrupting a chain of just mass producing pizzas right you've gone in there and you've fucked up their workflow so yes it takes longer they've got 500 people who've ordered pepperoni pizzas right and you got the one with the fucking this that and the other it takes a little bit of time sir this guy gets upset and he demands some free crazy bread okay and then they're like they didn't say anything they don't say whether they were to give it to him or not but he left the restaurant for a minute. Well, before he left, I have audio of what he said

to the person. Good. I would like some clarity. Please. Yeah. This is, he was getting a little bit upset here. I'd kill you if I had my gun. Well, he lives five miles away from this place. Yeah. When Doty returned to the Little Sears, he was carrying an AK-47. He went back and got his gun. Now, I will say this. There are a lot of times you should threaten violence on people. It actually is the answer to a lot of our problems in life. Cooking time is not one. one of them you can't cook a pizza faster with a rifle pointed out of person it's just that that's not how that works at all yeah well it's a lesson i've learned one too many times you can't rush it you can't rush the pizza you got to give it its time knives guns it doesn't work folks you have to

just wait it out so he comes into the first thing he does as he points the gun at a female worker who was on her first day on the job i actually have the audio of this too good good it's my first day she sounds a lot like the other guy now he's pointing a gun at her demanding his order when another employee sought to leave the restaurant cops before toady asked him where the hell do you think you're going

get back there and cook more pizza do I have a pizza yet sir does he think like more bad powers who's going to get his pizza made quicker it's like no it just it has to be the oven for 10 minutes sir I don't know what else to tell you well I got to tell you this Doty guy really isn't too bright because the staffer that he told him he's not allowed

to leave just went into the back room and called 911. Now, in a bid to get this guy to get out of the Little Caesars, the female customer had received her order, handed him her pepperoni pizza. Sir, I think you want this more than I do. Here you go, sir. And he was like, thank you and left.

Yeah, he got what he needed. So that was good. Problem solved, crisis averted. By the way, Dayla is a pretty good joke in here talking about how a gun's not going to cook anything any faster. He was like, a rifle, no, flame thrower. Yes. Correct.

Good call. That's what you need to brag. Hey, De La, is there a creep off after? show today. I don't know what you're up to these days. So Doty was subsequently arrested in charge with aggravated kidnapping, aggravated assault, which you put guilty to. Yes, Tiger Lily was pointed out,

that's kidnapping now. Yes, when you point to go to someone and say, where do you think you're going, that is kidnapping. Yeah. I like the person from Little Caesars who commented. She said she was shot at Doty's overreaction to a minor wait for pizza. And she said, we're not always hot and ready.

Dude, they're calling this an overreacted overreaction. But as I said in the cold open here about the pre show at the magic bag, if I had a gun with me that day when I'm waiting for this fucking pizza, how many times I ask our buddy Andy, Andrew, who's, uh, you know, the manager there. Hey, you, uh, you ordered that pizza, right? Yeah, the problem was no AK-47, dumbass. Correct. He didn't feel threatened enough to go get that pizza, make it happen. Yeah. You got to start putting me on the pizza patrol. Apparently I do. Although it shows up half eaten. So that's the problem with that. So there's a pizza tax.

There's a tax for services Understood But what I'm saying is if you put me in charge Your pizza will be there Correct, yes Or you'll be at the pizza One or the other Either way, just look for me

Just find me He'll be pizza Dang Lizard says Which idiot does that custom order At a fast food place Says no pickle Karen Paulino That is a very good point sir That is a very good point

You gotta love Vinnie Carlino What do you do Did you know that you're Vinnie Carlino now? I denounce it. You gotta love Vinnie Carlino. I do know that I'm Vinnie Carlino because I was signing people's posters as Vinny Carlino this week. I basically told anybody that walked up to me that was like me to write, what would you like me to write?

And there was a couple of them, a couple Carlinos out there. They're worth a lot of money now. You know what I was signing. I was just signing. Shee. Which is seven E's in that word. now you know good to know

Carl you want to go to Loveland Ohio I do yes I got some great news for you there's a job opening okay a greater Cincinnati man known for his Luke Skywalker

impersonations died by apparent suicide oh yeah here's a picture that's his mugshot and that's him and his so he's the old Luke Skywalker from the new movies yeah

you know who could do this job And I'm not, well, with the beard and the longer hair, my boy, John. Oh, yeah. You know what? That's a good point. John could pull off like old grumpy Lou Skywalker because Luke Skywalker is definitely jaded. He's pissed off at everyone. He doesn't, he just want to be left alone.

I can see that. Oh, stop it. I'm just talking about that he's got the hair and the beard. Yeah, I know. Like a badass Mark Hamel, John. Like badass Mark Hamel, buddy. Now, Loveland, Ohio. A greater Cincinnati man known for his Luke Skywalker impersonations killed himself, as I said,

but he did that after his arrest for possessing child sexual abuse material. So this guy's going around doing kids' birthday parties as Luke Skywalker. You know what his favorite line was? May I force my way in you? No. Good, good thought, though. No, it's, oh, no, I forgot my lightsaber. Wait, I have an idea.

He just painted it green. I just heard these weird electrical noises coming from my kids' room. John Stevens, he's 59 years old. Later, Creepo, Rottenhow. The coroner wrote that the circumstances surrounding his death was an apparent suicide. Stevens was indicted on 11 charges of pandering sexually oriented material involving a minor. Stevens was known across the region as Fluke Skywalker and portrayed the popular Star Wars character to children's and community events. Stevens had sexually explicit photos of children,

videos of female children. The criminal complaints from his July arrest explained. His website said he was, quote, a volunteer cosplayer for charity. Now, why not just escape to some planet that isn't on the charts? You know, an uncharted planet. Grab R2D2. Like Lou Skywalker did it in the X-Wing.

Right. That's what you do. Get out of time. Get the fucking Degabobah. Make sure there's no map showing where you are. Dillard from somewhere stole my joke. the force is in here he stole my joke and did it better now the real

loose guy Walker would not have given up oh wait yeah see actually he would thanks Ryan Johnson he would have given up those ain't real dude says it's not oil it's the force that's how the force works sir it is today oh man

Stephen said out his website that the money he raised from birthday parties goes to local charities that help sick children Hmm Well, isn't that great The Pito wants to help the sick ones How great for everybody Gotta keep my wife, Vinnie

I guess A dead 12 year old is no good to me Solid point Carl Well, it's just like how Dick Mansorson I've said this before But it's just the most brilliant plan ever If you want to end school shootings

You gotta get the pedophiles Working at the schools Who else is gonna protect the kids With their lives Who else is gonna jump in front of a bullet To protect Billy and Sally from a shooter behind me children behind me in front of me children in front of me

holy shit Carl wasn't the greatest that's pretty good Monty lewd Skywalker that's pretty good lewd Skywalker maybe someone else had it down there yeah that's good Hey when you were a kid wasn't Keep away like the greatest game ever Keep away? Yeah sure yeah it was always a lot of fun

You're not allowed to do it anymore because people call bullying but it was always a lot of fun Yeah, yeah, so you throw the thing over the people's hat. Yeah, come on, keep away, give it back. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Well, two women in Florida, Carl, are in trouble for playing keep away with a baby. Uh-oh. Would you mind hitting the baby throwers music, Carl?

Beautiful day on the field for some baby throwing. Brianna LaFoe, 19 and 20-year-old Sierra Newell, were arrested just before. 4.1 a.m. near Wild Avenue on Seabreys Boulevard and Volusia. According to witnesses, people told the woman to stop tossing the baby and started recording the incident on their phones. That's when witnesses

say Newell, who was holding the baby, became more aggressive. In return, she started throwing the baby up and down a little too aggressively. Why is there a baby in a bar at one in the morning? Oh, I'm sorry, it's Daytona Beach. I know the answer. Well, also, when I first had to read the story, I'm like, yeah, drunk chicks. All right. This is going to be

odd. There's a baby. Oh, fuck. All right. Never mind. Yeah, they said to her stop tossing the baby. Then she was like, oh, stop doing this. I just throw the baby up higher. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're playing catch with this fucking baby. And people are just like, and they're in these bikinis and they shouldn't be in bikinis. These women, there's a lot of things bad about this story.

Yeah. Surveillance footage from a nearby business showed Newell walking up to a person recording her and hitting them. All that happened while the baby was still in her arms. So she's like, stop filming me. She's got like the baby under what arm, but she's slapping. Yeah. Drunk girl slapping. backing people's phones out of their hands with the baby under her arm.

It's pretty crazy video. So according to the arrest affidavit, one of the women held the baby by its ankles and shook it. And then what she did was really spite me. She put the baby upside down. And it was like, hold up. This is getting way too far. So now she's just holding the baby upside down at the bar and probably having her drink. Right.

And it's a concrete sidewalk. They're running around on. I mean, this baby at any moment could just smash its head on the ground. These two are going to fail. fail health class. Yeah, that egg is not getting back there in a week. You're right. All we did was play one game of baseball

with it. I don't know what happened. There's a great sentence in this story that I really like. It says business orders of the area were appalled. Yeah. I'm pretty sure a lot of people did like this. There was one guy specifically that they taught you. They got a quote from. He was the manager of crazy Johns. And he was like, these women are insane. I don't know. it's John from crazy

Jodd and I know crazy and these women are it These women are fucking crazy Did you notice that really was a crazy job The guy's like I don't know what these ones got into these people They're heads and nuts Bad news folks

This is pretty fucked up The baby was saying to a Halifax hospital He had red marks on his back And x-ray photos indicated The baby has a possible broken arm Well they were swinging it around Yes It probably has a broken arm or two

I would imagine yes Yeah both both are being currently held without bond they're facing charges of child abuse without great bodily harm because yeah it's not great this whole thing isn't great bad bodily harm yeah bad bodily harm is what you should charge people with uh carl that's a good word to stop for a second let's hit up some super chats matthew raleigh two dollars why does viny look like that it's off put it you're fucking telling me matthew there's nothing i could do it dude i'm trying my fucking best to look like a human being and actually you're almost doing a centering john impression now you're reading two

dollar super chat they're just insulting you am i not supposed to read all the super oh i think you are i love it in fact there's one that we have to read and that's because it's coming in from nice here comes the money thanks for the super chat nice nice is always a huge supporter if lucky car will immediately offer the money for another boops pick from vic 20 bucks nice says what are the odd stuccio shows up love you guys good luck with that one yeah that's on minnie that's not my thing yeah i don't work by the way unbeknownst to mark i don't work for this club so this is not on me to figure out none of it has anything to do with you pal who's putting this on you i know he said good luck guys like uh huh uh just about yeah you're not probably not even

not even allowed in the building no i know i know i'm not i thought maybe i could do a podcast from this building, but I was told that can't be done either just now. Not that night. So $20 from Nice. Thank you so much. Nice. You're the greatest. And the odds are looking good.

Can you do me a favor? Sure. Can you just go up to our start? I think we might have missed one super chat that snuck in there. Yep, yep, yep, yeah. Broccoli. Oh, actually, there's a couple that snuck in there. Oh, there was a bunch of snuck in there.

Yeah. All right. So broccoli, two bucks. Details on the March 10th, such show event, Vinny. brockley i don't know about that avatar that looks a little bit uh insulting to certain people not nice like actors from breakfast at tiffany's that's a great mickey rooney picture it really is it's spot on uh well there are tickets available right on the website yes tickets are available now you go to stuttering john live dot com and you get yours now

so i uh i think it's going to be a lot of fun he's going to do the show that he wants to do It's going to be the John show. So there's going to be stand up storytelling and Cardiff is going to be there. Q and a audience Q&A. Yep. And just a couple of old guys on rocking chairs, just talking about their old war stories. There's not going to be rocking chairs.

We'll probably do like a two chair set up for that. Yeah. Like I think, you know, Cardiff will do a good job interviewing. He will. Cardiff actually knows more about the dabalmers than all of us combined. Yeah. And I know that he's very excited and he's going to be putting in a lot of work

into it so that'll be fun and then uh radish diff carl had a white waffle white flour you idiot's you tubby i said white flour white flour uh monte 699 canadian minnie's bad at fighting superchats i don't know why is it said there it is uh been listening for about a year and a half and just sign up for patreon thanks for the last car i love you guys cheers Cheers. Dude, thank you very much for signing up for the Patreon. I assume you're talking about the creep off, but I'll take it either way. Well, if you haven't signed up for the creepoff patron, you get a bonus episode every week,

except for last week, but we're going to make up for it. I got some stuff in the works. And actually, we did have a very fun episode of, uh, there was like a little bit of a creep off bonus within our live show in Detroit. You know, what was really cool was the coolest guy in the world, Drew Lane. Yeah, was on a segment, BFL, Yeah. And we watched a code cam video. That was phenomenal. Yes. So we're going to do those more often on the show, not this week, but we're going to have some more on this regular version. So keep an eye out for that. Now let's go to Largo, Florida, Carl. Yes. Is it Largo Florida or is it California? I have Largo Florida here. I'll take your word for it. A registered sex offender, ladies and gentlemen, here he is. It's awesome.

Austin Powers. He's in a lot of trouble. He's been arrested at police say he met a Largo teen on Snapchat and lured her away from home. I'll let that. I just love that song so much. I really do love that. Oh, it's great.

Yeah, it's fantastic. I just have something I want to tell Mr. Powers here. Yeah. Oh, behave. She's not listening. No, I know. He tried to lure a teen girl away. She's 14 years old from her parents

and pose as a parent of a friend and introduced himself to the victim's mother. He didn't try to. He successfully dead. Yeah. This stupid idiot. So this guy's 26 years old and the 14-year-old's mom

thought that he also had a daughter her age. Why would you think that, Davy? Not even close. So while investigating, police say they learned that the team had left home after her parents discovered her secretly talking with the adult male on Snapchat. Investigators say the man

who they have since identified as Austin Powers picked up the girl at a home at least one time before she ran away. They say he picked up the girl again several days later. This time according to police, he posed as the father of one of her friends and even met the victim's mother. Police say Powell, Powers told the girl's mom that he was taking the victim to play with his daughter at his house. Yeah. Yeah, daughter's what I call my dick. I just be playing with my daughter all afternoon. According to the L. P.D. Powers has been previously arrested for a similar incident in 2016. See, this is that Skywalker guy just killed himself. This is the guy who won't give up.

This guy is just like, no, this is what I do. And I'm going to do it. He's being charged with traveling to meet a minor and lewd and lascivious molestation. Lecivis molestation, worst kind. Is that the worst kind? Yeah. Sounds bad. It's not like silly molestation. That's the best guy. That is the best kind, isn't it? Like tickle it and shit. Yeah. yeah you know by the way i have a theory full molestation i very much hate to be tickled i'm very ridiculously ticklish that's why i hate what people thought oh yeah you hate when people

touch you yeah but my wife comes at me all the time and tries to tickle me and uh i call it laugh rape hmm well you know what you know it's not laugh rape is your stand-up show good thing i quit is that why you don't like ray de vito because he's too touchy too Feeley I thought I don't like Ray DeVito I don't know Ray DeVito He was lecturing me about how I don't know How to use Instagram

Because I keep mine private Oh right Yeah I forgot about that whole conversation Ray was explaining to you How to be a stand-up comic I forgot Yeah I just sat there Thanks Ray Thanks for all that

Zimbabwe Carl Yes You would not do well there What What are you trying to say Being a feminine With no children and all In the wood paneling

The wood pan-green felt on my pool table. You wouldn't last five minutes in Zimbabwe. Okay, what happened? Police have arrested. Let's get Austin off the screen as child molester. Do more publicity for child molesters, please. Okay. Thank you.

Bye, baby. Oh, behave. They arrested a gay couple. After one of them approached the police demanding that the other would be arrested. He tried to tattle on his boyfriend. My boyfriend's stuck in my penis. That's illegal in this country. Oh, I'm telling.

Oh, I'm telling. So this is a weird story. And I don't know if I understand exactly what's going on, but both of these men have been arrested. Correct. Okay. That's what you need to know before I get into this. And I'm going to try to tell you what I think happened. This is a country where gay sex is illegal.

Yeah. Which kind of makes the whole LGBTQ plus who complain about like the U.S. seem kind of silly. Gay sex is illegal there. or as Carl calls it, sex. Well, okay, I don't know if you want to read the story or if you want me to explain why this is illegal in this country. Yeah, go ahead. This is the reason why.

One of the things they do is called anal leaking, where a man's ennus is leaked like this, like ice cream. And then what happens, even poo comes out. The other than poo is out, and then they eat the poo. The other one they do is they have a sex practice called fisting, where they insert their hand into the other man's hand, and it goes into the inners all the way. And it is so painful, they have to take drugs, but they enjoy it. You can see a man here having sucked the other person's rectum, and the other person is poo-pooing, and this one is hitting the poo all over the place. tell me when you have a law against homosexuality

do you say except eating yeah Vinnie is that what you want you want these guys just eating poo poo all over the place do you see why there's laws against this mini it's actually pretty good rationale right there they eat the poopoo sorry that was a lot it was a lot to digest right there

so to speak Carl enough chewing the shit literally they're in the poohpoo I fucking hate you for playing it's so gross and tough okay Midlands Provincial

Police spokesperson Inspector Emmanuel Mohako said police however arrested both men after investigators revealed that the two have been staying together since July whilst engaging in sodomy Major crimes.

Shit. They're facing sodomy charges. Now, what happened was during the month of July, on an unknown day, one of the suspects, James M, in one building, met up with a guy, someone named Praise, also last name M, in a nightclub who pretended to be a woman well dressed like a woman. Believe me, she would not be my first choice that I can tell. The first one, James proposed love to this woman, said, I love you, you're beautiful. I want to be with you together, be with you forever. And that invited him or her to stay with him.

It's very confusing. Yes. These are all dudes, but they bed there for a while. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then one day the two of them quote, this is the story from the, this is what I'm, this is it. This is what they told us.

Yes. They had an argument after praise got erect as they were cuddling in preparation for intimacy. Stop it. So James got pissed off that praise got a boner for some reason. Well, it's his girlfriend. So yeah, that's not good. So I'm wondering, did he not realize this was a woman?

Did he like live with a trans person and not realize it? This is not a joke. I guess. And either way, now they're both at jail for no good reason. They're in jail for a Saturday night. Right. But yeah, this is. similar to that code blue with that woman called the cops on her boyfriend and then

ended up going to get arrested herself. This guy goes to the police. You won't believe what happened here. I've been living with this chick. Turns out she's got an erect penis. We fuck all the time. And they're like, well, sir, that's very illegal on here. I'm both going to jail now. Yeah, I've been paying this dude for like five months and I had no idea. Okay, well, come with us, sir. Not good, sir. Not good. one of the thing they do is called enno leaking okay okay I gotta get eat the poo-poo as an ISO out here I just realized what was I thinking not doing that this show has been going for gonna be three something years and we haven't done that years and I have not gotten they eat the either of us I know we failed you as your host better late than never that's what I like to say when we start at 106 that's what I like to say it's good philosophy better late than never comes in handy for events like that Carl let's go to cypress texas real quick what's going on in cypress texas well i'm just

introduce you to a gentleman this is him this gentleman is uh how do i put this when i tell you what he did you're going to go yep checks out look at this face lam nagan tran he's 65 years old and he murdered his wife okay i mean so far i don't see the problem but go on his wife 49 year old my tie dang was it the number 63 it sounds good right I didn't get a lot to eat. Isn't that what you ordered? Yes. Okay.

They found her in a pool of her own blood. She was pronounced dead at the scene. Now, she'd been beaten to death with a heavy pneumatic nail gun. Ooh. Now, Biden, what do you think about getting killed by a nail gun? This is not a joke. That's not a joke. That's brutal.

Candidate Trump, what do you think about being murdered by a nail gun? I denounce it. All right. Stop it. Nobody wants that. you know what he said to her when she was complaining about it oh bitch bitch bitch shit partner cut that pot out okay now we're getting silly yeah moving this is what happens we end up digressing into silly talk okay when the deputies found Tran who had reportedly

tried he tried to kill himself by shooting himself with the nail gun several times he tried commit suicide by nail gun you don't own a fucking rope there are so many better ways to kill yourself was he owned a tesla start the car up and close the garage door you're killing yourself with a nail gun sir so this guy had had the situation he's like i have a nail gun three nails and two people need to die yeah i know so uh i don't want to fuck this up let me just beat her to death with this with the blood instrument then i'll shoot myself with it wow that sounds like a very horrific way to die. Well, he's sentenced to 40 years in prison and he pled guilty to the murder earlier this

year. And boy, is that a guilty face. Well, so this is what happened. She was going to leave him. He was an abusive husband. She goes, well, I'm going to leave him. Wow. I know, right? Can you believe it?

He was abusive like that? This guy makes, uh, what's his name, uh, machete look handsome. Like he looks. I know. It's not, it's not a good luck. But who am I to judge? Um, I think, because he was all upset that she was going to find someone new. I think making your bitch wife someone else's problem is the sweetest revenge that you

could have. So just for all the guys out there, just like if, if I can't have you, no one can, it's a horrible way to go through life. Let that bitch that irritates you every fucking day of your life go be someone else's problem. Namaste, baby. Have peace in your life. Right.

Go away. Fucking get away from it. so he's going to jail for 40 years and I got to be honest with you he deserved it now before I bring up a guy who I'm going to call our creep of the week and the scum stream car but wait but viny yeah this guy came over from vietnam yeah to this country Minnesota of course he came to minnesota sure from vietnam do we need to get back to vietnam and show these people what's up like they're getting a little too comfortable got aren't they do we need to get back over there get them on their heels a little bit

it didn't work out well the first time no so so let's try it again hard pass the sequel should be good uh i say you know we do just just go after korea just go after them again yeah we need fix korea south and north i'm with you let's go take them both out take them both out these hundas are getting stolen all over the fucking place but uh way to build a card dummies but uh as far as the streaming algorithm is concerned i uh i say let china take taiwan taiwan what i never heard of such a place okay um daily mail carl oh you know what fuck that we got a bunch of super chats yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah vini you looking okay today still voting for carla thanks for the thank you dela he also added can i assume all my patreon dollars go to car yes you can't thank you

oh i should point out since you're talking about our looks i have my brand new queen to the stone age shirt on that my brother-in-law sent me i was not able to go to the concert but he was nice enough to get me this uh fancy fancy t-shirt one of my favorite bands of all time That is a cool shirt. Thank you. Nice comes out. Nice. Let me hit something for a nice because nice deserves it.

Yay, Super Chats. Carl, you're so nice. Here is a few more bucks for the pussycat in Florida. $20 from Nice. Thank you, nice. Nice is another one. It's all over the place all the time. It's amazing.

Thanks, nice. Amazing. Dang lizard, two euros. Fun fact, Austin Powers is 26 years old. We've been able to that today. Dayla two bucks give permission to VC on Discord I don't know what the fuck that means

give permission to VC on Discord Viet Kong Does someone need permission on discord Dale reach out to me I don't If I got to do something Let me know

And then Dale I got five bucks Thank you Dela Vinnie would eat the poop Depending on what they ate Voltcaro Yeah human son of Pete Vinnie We call him

No Don't be dicks That's not true Pizza you had pizza for lunch Get over here All right I'm going to introduce you to our creep of the week this week

There he is There's Ian Ranny ladies and gentlemen Seems happy doesn't he proud of himself Yeah he sure does Ben he's he voted today That's why he took that photo to show up Oh yeah He's fucking voting in our free elections

Hold out I got it There he is He's got to stay here Oh good I'm glad this guy's making decisions On my behalf I'll put him right down here I just want to make sure that face is in frame for while we talk about this guy now the daily mail did a a little bit of an expose on this gentleman

um he's a resident of san matteo uh texas i believe he had just gotten his dream job at a nearby luxury result in rosewood sand hill uh he put off his start date oh i'm sorry he's in california and he went to texas last november right so he was never able to get back to californ so again it's one of these problems people from california going to texas and ruining it he's one of those guys. Well, exactly. He's, he's like Joe Rogan. That's not what I meant. Oh, okay. I'm sorry. So he never got back to California, though, even though he got his dream job, Carl. You know why? Because he was arrested outside of San Mateo walking into a warehouse in the middle of an FBI sting. Because he showed up with instruments of torture, including restraints, ropes, and

batons cool he had been responding to an ad seeking quote an experienced sadist you know what's funny there's a certain guy I know who runs a comedy club who would also likely respond to that ad I think I heard his dog down the hall a second ago that dog will bite the shit I know I know I will oh fuck that they're a team those two dude I saw johnwick four in the movie theater with him And there's a part where this one guy has got this crazy attack dog and it comes diving out of a room like nobody expects it,

just takes this guy out and I go, Sonny, no! See, you're still doing comedy, Vinny. Just not where anybody wants you to. Just where you should shut the fuck up. I had a mic and everything. I brought my PA.

White guys in movies all be like making jokes and stuff. I didn't get to see the end of the movie. Sir, go with us. You need to leave. We don't care what your closer is, sir. You've got to go. We don't care about the squeegee bits. I was just going to get

to the snowblower thing. I didn't get to the snowblower thing yet. Okay. So, he responds to an ad seeking an experienced status who would be paid $6,000 to torture a human trafficking victim to get her to engage in sex worker. So basically

what is happening here is they put out an ad saying, hey, we got all these belligered women we kidnapped that just won't fuck for hire. Right. And we need a Bronco buster in here. Yeah. Get these women in line. Let's go.

Yeah, it turned out to be the federal sting. And the ad was posted by a, uh, someone, an agent posing as a human trafficker. What percentage of those ads are real? Zero. Is that really how you recruit people like this through online advertising? It's really funny. Ian thought he had his dream job. Yeah.

But then he saw an ad and realized his real dream. Yeah. now in February rainy pled guilty to attempted kidnapping the possession of child pornography he was sentenced to 14 years in jail last week in Dallas now the new sent shockways to California where he was pursuing a sadistic double life while working as a high-end Somalié that's right yeah this is the fucking guy who brings you the wine oh it's so nutty I'm gonna go fucking beat up some women to get him to fuck for money look at this guy look at those fucking eyes

Oh, I just like him The guy loves waterboarding people To get a job with the CIA If that's what you enjoy I mean there's opportunities in this country for everyone, sir And he was loved at his job People seemed to like him His nickname was Sheldon

Because he looked like the guy from the Big Bang theory So he needed another reason to hate him The harmless dork that no one's afraid of This sadistic fuck Oh, I can just imagine this fucker sharpened a knife going I'll show you who's afraid of Sheldon Jesus Christ So they called him

Shelton because he strongly resembled Jim Parsons A relative of a traumatized woman told Daily Mail.com that Rainey had been living with the young woman and her husband for years in a condo complex in San Mateo and they'd known each other since high school. Now, she fancied herself in love with being the family member said he treated her very badly. I'm not surprised at what happened.

I knew he was into that kind of stuff, making people feel bad, hurting women. Rainey had worked at Torres Steakhouse, an upscale restaurant in San Carlos that recently closed. He started out there as a waiter after the restaurant opened in 2019. A wine enthusiast, he worked his way to become the Somalié and briefly served as general manager. A co-worker at this restaurant described him as an odd dude who seemed harmless.

They said that he was a handsome guy with a cheesy mustache. He drove to work in a Tesla wearing a suit. He was also kind of creepily, in a way he'd linger around the tables with older female customers. He quote, liked cougars, the co-worker said. He couldn't get him away from those tables because he was flirty with them.

He also had weird social issues but otherwise seemed normal. One coworker continued to say, he always thought he was the smartest guy in the room, but that wasn't the case. Obviously. No shit. He even told me at one point he was on a bit on the spectrum. He didn't pick up social cues.

He would continue to talk and didn't get it when it was time to shut up and leave. he had this odd way we just got used to. He didn't seem dangerous at all, just weird. You're a stupid, dumbass. Now, he made no secret to the fact that he was pursuing a three-way relationship with a married couple as well.

He lived with them, this other woman and her husband. And the girl had a kid, according to another server that he worked with. It was a weird triangle thing. According to Ian, she took turns where she slept at night, and he was pretty open about it. But I didn't get into that with him. it was his private life.

Now, however, he did get into some trouble at work, and this is what makes him the creep of the week. Oh, not the going to go torture women and all that stuff. Okay. Here's why I don't like him. As a former server, he had another gig that he worked at that he got fired from. And it turns out that what he would do is he,

after becoming the manager, he would hoard the tips for himself. Yeah, he would, there's always like, especially high-end restaurants, you got your high rollers to come in there. They're regulars. They love taking care of the staff. They love that they can swing their dicks around. Everyone goes, oh, Mr. Johnson's here. And so this guy's like, I'll be taking Mr. Johnson's table tonight.

Yeah, he would take over the high paying customers tables. It's fucked up. To the point that it was so egregious that the service were organizing to sue him for wage fraud. So this guy is proud of himself for voting, proud of himself for driving a Tesla, hoarding all the money he's basically just a standard Democrat enjoys torturing

people that ain't funny I can raise my eyebrows at you too sir oh Carl now another person who knew him said he had plenty of money he had taken tips that he shouldn't have and made a ton of money before leaving the restaurant

and he was about to start a good, well-paying job that he really wanted to do. That was his dream job, the colleague said, but he never started it. He put off his start date so he could go to Texas. Yeah, and torture women for $6,000. Yeah. $1,500 a day is what it pays to torture women. So listen, I know that R-Bs is $15 an hour now. Do you feel like you're good?

But there's opportunity out there for everyone. So this asshole had planned to go to Texas, tie up this woman, and waterboard her for at least four days, dowsing her genitals with a chemical irritant and subjecting her to sensory deprivation. Yeah, I love that he explained to this anonymous person that he was hiring him on the internet, all of the things

he was planning on doing qualifications too. Yeah, hey dummy. It's a trap! How do you not know? This is the FBI setting you up. You know what they said to him when he showed up? You, my friend, have committed a crime.

Now, this is what he told these cops. He is, uh, specializes in objectification and degradation, degradation, I'm sorry. I can say that properly. Sure. Having psychologically destroyed a few girls, he had he could break any bitch. He described himself as 35 male 6'4 sadistic dom who would quote, use you mercilessly showing you a world of pain you never imagined. His social media shows a luxurious.

Furious lifestyle filled with travel and elegant dinners. No one told me there was going to be boasting. Yep. Showed his vaccine card. Oh, here we go. That showed off his Tesla, his voting records on Facebook. Uh, here we go. I know this guy.

You don't like this guy. I've met this guy before. Well, Ian Rainey, I would like to congratulate you because you're our creep of the week. You are the creep of the week. A piece of shit. Second place is Vinnie for twisting his mustache so much today. What is going on with you in that mustache? Are you going to be one of those mustache guys now?

No. You're going to put the oil on the ends and twirl it up? You can't do oil on the ends. It's got to be wax. Wax, okay. I'm not doing that. So what happened was this morning as I was sitting down, I noticed that I had it curling on one side and I put it down.

And then it kept curling up. So I did the other side. And I'm like, but doing this. But then I was being evil viny earlier. Okay. Twisting it. And it's just fun to do. I just thought that you were looking for any excuse to avoid your in-laws.

You were just, I'm in the bathroom. my mustache. He's just spending 30 minutes of there working on your mustache. It's not right yet. No way. Carl. What a show. What a show. We have more superchance. You guys have been very generous today. Wow. I don't even know why we do all this research. I creeps and shit. We should just be reading these stories. Oh, good point. It's fantastic today. Dang Lizard, thanks for the five bucks. As war hero, Alan Torring,

was arrested for car like behavior. Yeah, he was. Condemned a hormone therapy resulting in depression and Brody by eating a poisoned apple yeah good point yeah can we get a creep the week off the screen i like him uh is that his eyes the lawyer his eyes are just in oh hi vince did chooley's team up team set up tuki audio from detroit press one for carl's social security number love producer chris hate big viny for betraying john i don't know did shooley's teams have tuky audio from detroit oh i get it because that didn't work in the hotel room oh yeah that's right the next day i was trying to watch that and uh yeah it was not good it was very echoy although i think it was card his fault i'm not mistaken

hate big viny for betraying john i didn't betray john yeah we're not betraying john over here listen i'm just gonna say can i please say one thing i'm not looking to fuck john over for the hundredth fucking time you people i want this thing to happen i want the guy to have a good show i want him to walk with some good video that he could use to promote himself in his career and maybe turn some things around and get some good things going for him. Stop being a prick, dude. You're fucking half the reason the guy's in the mess that he's in. I'm trying to help him.

Jesus Christ. Vinny is team-settering John. I fucking hate you. Monty with 2007-19, that's Canadian. Says, I meant W-H, blah, talking about the Patreon. He goes, I meant W-A-T-P, but just signed up for the creep-off. Very good, sir. Thank you very much for that.

In the words of Opie. Give yourself a bail. Thank you, Manny. Thank you so much. Y'all should do creepiest influencer. That is a good category. What was that, actually, I don't know that too,

this guts referring to here, but did you see that that mommy influencer was arrested for neglecting her children? Here's this really famous YouTubers all about how to be a mom and giving all this advice and it turns out that she was not feeding her children. locking them in rooms

because she was too busy being a star on the internet It's a very funny story Well, there's always next week I've got the creep out if I can't wait to hear more That would be a good one to do That should be our teaser Now, uh, tant-da-lan dang lizard again

The first Austin Powers is actually 26 years old Oh, yeah, the movie itself, yes, that's correct Dang Lizard, man, you're the best, thank you so much So you're telling me that that guy's parents named that kid Austin The year that movie came out That's what it sounds like I know that the first one's pretty full funny like you said that music the initial scene very good dude the second one i don't i was 18

years old maybe under the influence of something in the theater watching that i just turned 18 i have never laughed harder than the fucking jerry springer scene where dr evils beating the fucking guy everything okay uh matt trybomb 10 bucks thank you brother how have you guys not covered creepiest child beauty pageant parents yet oh also if he looks like disney channel momster today. Yeah, it kind of does. Hey, that dog got on briefcase after all. Thank you, Bucky, by Matt Tribomb.

And, yeah, wasn't that Honey Boo Boo? Can I call her mom to be the child beauty pageant parent? Yeah, I got to tell you that that is a great suggestion, Matt. And I really like it. And we're getting a lot of good ones today. Thank you, guys. Yes, this is great. I want to make sure I'm not missing anybody here.

Shannon Duffy $1.99, Vinnie takes Chinese HGH and weak testosterone. I think the Shannon tells you that every week, if I'm not mistaken. Every time I'm anywhere, it's posted somewhere. That's hilarious. David Chandler.

David Chandler coming in. Here comes the money. Here we go. Thanks for the super chat. There's David Chandler, Gandhi, Jesus, and Abraham Lincoln. David fits right in with

this group. I agree. And actually, Lincoln is pretty far down that list. But yes, David Chandler with $100, do I sense a bit of jealousy for Vinny's sweet stash, Carl, maybe a little bit. I mean, showing it off the whole episode, sir. I love that it took that for David Chandler to finally post a super chat. For one, for $1,000, I'll shave it off and bail it to you. For $2,000, I'll give you my teeth. I'll make my teeth out of my head. Dude, they're going to fall in any day. Just wait.

Just put a cup under your mouth. Lady K, got tooth decay, that lady K. I played on the Drew and Mike show, Marcus. I think Erno is Jim Belly. He's like, that's actually pretty funny. Okay. Can I go ahead and say something that my pal Stuttering John did that is hysterical? I would love for you to lie about Suttering John.

Oh, I'm not lying. This is hysterical. Have you heard his new nickname for Shulet? no it's not the dues payer anymore well it can't be that wouldn't be new it's pretty good what's the new uh the duty wear oh he didn't come up with that it's more than the chat did it is it is good it is good though oh i heard him do it i thought it was the best thing i left you think he came up with that he didn't go up with dusepayer he didn't go with duty wear he just reads shooley's anonymous all day that's how that's where jugg gets all of his material from all right whoever came up with

the duty wear it's way better than dues payer i agree yeah i even heard uh what's his fucking nuts laughing about it All right, folks. I even heard what does fucking nuts laughing about it? I guess we're winding down here on the show, but it seems like we've done it enough. We've done it all today. It's all downhill. Suburited serving tonight at 8 o'clock on the Suburit Surfing YouTube channel.

Yes, sir. There are people vying to be the producer of the show. There's a competition. So tune in for that. Yeah, I'll tell you what it is just because you folks hung out until the end. We're going to discuss an interesting conspiracy theory about a lost civilization entitled Tartaria and that's all I'll tell you okay see you tonight for that and uh until then folks please go to the creepoff.com yes if you want to support the show or just follow us on

Instagram Twitter social media and all that stuff or subscribe to the audio podcast it's a great listen we've got a ton of episodes in the back catalog I believe I had about four people I'm lying it was two at the at the meet greet tell me that because we started broadcasting on your YouTube channel here for WATP that they subscribed to the audio and went back and started listening to episodes and are digging the show. Awesome. So if you haven't done that, check it out. You might have a lot of fun.

I actually had someone come up to me and tell me how they have no problem listening to the creep off while eating dinner. And I said, God bless you, because we used to do this at noon on Mondays and we went, people were having lunch. We really can't. We got to stop doing that. Yeah, this is an after-lach activity. Yeah, I don't recommend this while you're eating this show, especially when they're eating

the poo-poo. Thank you, Tiberius. Tartary is legit one of the best eat popcorn and laugh conspiracy theories. So join us for that tonight. Awesome. All right. Sounds good. Yeah, people are telling me they were checking out. So please do that. All the links are at the creepoff.com as well as a link to the Patreon supercasts and back. Where you'll be getting a bonus episode this Friday. And thanks again to the super chatters. You guys, David Chandler, nice, dang lizard. All you guys, Uncle Sammy Poos in there a lot. Thank De La. Dayla all the time. You guys are fucking awesome if you want to get free bonus content like minnie said the creep off patreon is the

best bang for your buck in podcasting we do a a bonus show every week and we change it up we've been doing scum streams we've also been doing the watch along with thunder and paradise hall of fame episodes chrystalia oh my gosh our buddy uh my buddy kevin in la reached out to me and he said holy shit that was like watching date line or something he said he loved our uh presentation of Christalia, so I appreciate that. Well, folks, you are just the best audience in podcasting and on YouTube. Thanks for being you. Remember, it's nice to be important.

It's more important to be nice. Gagia. Because Vinny's a creep. And Carlos a weirdo. You're not charismatic. I'm not kidding around. They're both a generous psychopaths. no business in a civilized society, and they're gonna take you on a scum parade.