The Creep Off - Episode 77: Kindergarten Cookout

Episode Date: August 24, 2021

This week Karl and Vinnie return to China, spoiler they have a lot of creeps in China: In the scum parade we check in on a British clown, we meet a very disappointed grandmother and her equestrian grandson,  finally another horrific murder lands at Karl's club feet. 

Attention parents, what you're about to see is not suitable for kids. Shoot, it's not even suitable for some grown-ups. You might want to walk away now if you ain't into these type of things. I'm going to give the people what they want. Sensation, horror, shock. I'm going to deliver the goods because I'm alive and I'm not backing down. Go-cool, go-goo. This is my...

My kind of town, Chicago is. It's a new one. Oh, yes. Disgusting, a vomit-inducing thing. Ola Creepos, welcome to another edition of your favorite true crime podcast, the show that's a true crime podcast and a drinking game. You're right. As Carl reminded me this week. The only show that's a true crime podcast and a drinking game.

Drink whenever time many references pro wrestling for no reason. I'm very excited. We are one week away from the live show. That's right. Less than a week away this Saturday in Lombard, Illinois, WATP Live.com for tickets. and we will have a scum parade on that show. Yes, I'm preparing it as we speak. I found an amazing story for it.

It's such a good story. I was tempted to do it on this show today. Okay. But I'm like, you know what? I got to save it for the live audience. Beautiful. Love it. I guess you're all fucked.

Now, ladies and gentlemen, we are going to go back to China this week. We've never done this before. We've never picked the same category two times, but it's a big place. And last week, there were so many stories that we had to choose from. We both were, like, ready to go with the second choice.

And we said, let's just do it because they're both pretty fucking good. Yes, correct. There are so many creeps in China. And I would say underreported in this country. So these are fun. And they're not easy to research a lot of these. There's not a lot of information out there. You know, like a bunch of the ones that I read end with convicted and executed.

Right. End of story. Why did they do it? They didn't give a fuck. They're just like, you're done. We kind of pander to our criminals here. We want to know what makes you tick. Right.

Tell us more. We make him celebrities and give him 14 documentaries and a Netflix deal. We're a little silly over here. It was 2020 when people were like, oh, that Ted Bundy, he was a dreamboat. Like, that's where we're at. We're still celebrating this guy. Yes. Like, we're a fucked up society.

In China, they're like, no, you're piece of shit. You're not even going to find a news article about this asshole gone. Well, because in China, the CCP is like, we're the ones that kill the citizens around here, not you, us. This is our job. You think he'd be going to get some. glory of staging the emperor, do you? We'll take care of this. You know, the government does everything, including murdering innocent people. We got, we got you. Yeah. So, ladies and gentlemen, my creep today is the Chinese government. You win, all right. I'm on the board. No, no, let's talk about

last week's results. Okay. Before we go too heavy. This was interesting last night. Do you want to, do you want to talk about what happened? Yeah, I'll talk about it. Because you were at the club, Steve's in town. Yeah. Yeah. And he had. They added two more shows, right? Yeah. So he was sold out for both shows last night. Yeah. And I was a part of the show.

I was running all of his videos for him and doing shit. So that was my part of the show, was being behind the scenes and being in no way in anywhere near any spotlight where I belong in the shadows of the quarter. Yeah, that's not the point, though. The point is that you were at a club that was packed with people and telling them to vote for you. Oh, 100%. At the last minute. All the servers, bartenders. We saw that around 830, I had a lead of about 9 votes.

That was right before the second show started. And I was saying to the service, hey, come here. You guys got your phones? Come here. Yeah. I was ramping up towards midnight. So, right. So I had a lead of nine votes at 8.30.

And then people are watching it throughout the evening. All of a sudden, you take the lead. Like, whoa, how there's this many votes? And then you came out and said, no, I'm telling people to vote. There's no shenanigans, no bot traffic. No, yeah. Those are legitimate people going and voting. I saw you telling people that.

I didn't know if I believed you or not, but whatever. I took a picture and gave somebody the middle finger on Discord to show like a giant light of people. I did see that. Yeah. Yeah. So, Vinny's good with Photoshop, but not that good. So that story checks out. Now, what's interesting, though, is...

Oh, I was totally pandering. I will admit it because I was fucking pissed. You didn't have a great weekend. No. I'm not having a good... You're not going well for you. Well, I'm going to point out later on the show. We'll see how much longer it's going anywhere for your buddy, Vinny.

I'm going to point out a weekend. that could only be the best weekend of anybody's life that you and I could never pull off. But that's a little foreshadowing. So what's crazy, though, is that at midnight last night, which is the cutoff time for voting, somehow, some way, even though I was not talking to anyone or communicating, I was in a packed club,

telling people to vote for me. But for some reason, I crept back, and I won by one vote 91 to 90. Oh, God! Oh, yeah. baby, I'm on the wrong board. No, God, please no. No.

No. So I thought you had it. I thought you had it last week, Vinny. Your creep was crazy. The most prolific serial killer in Chinese history. But people got behind that my creep was... Triple-digit numbers, Carl. People got behind that my creep was selling the meat, the people meat,

to the wet market. that he was keeping the eyeballs in jars at his house. It just seemed creepier. My dude was just giving corpse his aides. So I am in the lead already for the next round. I'm up one nothing. Wow, that was an amazing victory on my part. I'm going to do something that hasn't been done around here in a while.

You requested that I hold off on my consequence from last week, Seamus's stand up until tomorrow night. Oh, right. Yes. Which is going to be the night. Okay, so I got to go and film this open mic. Yeah, you need to be there tomorrow night. Well, I'll give you the details.

So I sent you, it's about a seven-minute spot where he does his first stand-up. So I'm going to have to break it down to the amount of time that they allow me to have. You should take out the shit where he talks about being a ginger and stuff like that's what I was thinking. I was going to ask you what you want to do because there's like a bit's about looking like Conan O'Brien and I'm like, I mean, it would be funny if I did it with confidence. Andy Richter would make more sense. Right. I would deliver it with confidence so that the. audience would not only not laugh, they would just be completely confused.

Right. Right. Well, you're going to do it either way. Yeah. So no one knows it's happening, except for, I think, Brian Ball, because he listens to this show. And he texted me and he goes, oh, I can't wait for this. I can't wait either. So, like, nobody, none of the comics know what's going to happen.

And I'm just going to show up and fucking do it. And then you and I are going to the bar. Well, I have banned practice after that, but I'm just going to film it and get out of there. so I can go play in my instrumental rock band I fucking hate you so much I know I can't wait it's really so fun I might even like release it in pieces

because I'm so excited about this I don't even know if I want to put it all out there at once we're going to release it obviously on the Instagram for the creep off yeah we'll put it on YouTube we'll put it on Instagram we'll put it out on WATP channels we'll make sure everyone sees it I rather you didn't

I know would you please not I know you'd rather. And please don't put video, please, listen, I have one request. Nope. I have one request of you. Someone reminded me that we were talking about doing Vicks stand up at one place and then going to another place and doing, uh... I don't know anything about it. I don't know anything about it.

You're already getting off the off easy here. Now listen, here's what I wanted, this is my request, Mr. SEO. Yep. When you post us on YouTube, when we put it on the creep off channel, it's labeled as Seamus or Patrick Michael's stand-up. consequence, not Vinnie Paulino stand up. We'll see. Because that's will be a problem for me. We'll see about that.

And I'm going to very politely. Oh, cuck, sucker. This is not good for me. Do I look like someone who cares about your career, Vinnie? Do you think I'm worried about you losing out on gigs because people Google your name?

I'll fucking chill you. I know. With a knife. I know. I can't wait. This is great. Oh, right. I might write Vinie Paulino 17 times in the description. just so that shows up first for any type of search that somebody puts in Vinnie Paulino

comedian from Rochester NY Vinnie Paulino funny guy hire Vinnie Pauli All right Are you having an event You should not have planned

in that seed I wasn't even thinking that Oh Jesus Christ Yeah well I run the YouTube channel So All right so what do we got China round two Do it hit the bell Very good

You won mother Fucker. You know what? Let me get the mood for China. Hold on. I downloaded this wonderful sound of the Beijing Senior Choir singing, Carl. This is lovely. This will get us right in the mood for this. All right. I feel good now. Great. Now I'll be humming that all day. Good. What an earworm that was. I'm telling you, it's stuck in there. What a catchy jettling. Now you know why Yoko Onos things like that.

Yes. Because she's retarded. All right, Mike, she's Mrs. Ah. My creep is Wang Chang. So, Wang Chang. Everybody have fun tonight. Oh, tonight. His parents were divorced when he was six years old.

his brother stays with the mom he goes with his dad now his dad is an alcoholic who gambles illegally not long after the divorce the dad is arrested for trying to kill someone in an argument over gambling so you would think he'd go back with his mom well the mom was already hooked up with another guy at this point and she's like I don't want you yeah

sounds like the kid's the one who lost gambling yeah right So Chang has to go live with his grandparents. Now his grandparents do not live in a very nice neighborhood and it does not work out very well for our friend Chang. His stomping ground was Tai Yuan Lu or Tai Yuan

Street. Because he was much smaller than many of the other people there he was mercilely bullied and often robbed. On one occasion, Chiang was beaten so badly that the people who passed his body record that they thought he was already dead. He

woke up, covered in his own blood, he gritted his teeth and crawled his way back to Xin Yang Railway Station. Are you telling me that you're creep is the smallest man in China? I know. That's going to be a tidy. You have to be.

It's hard to do. You have to fit in people's pockets. Well, the problem was that this kid was not going to school. He didn't have anyone looking over him, looking after him, so he's just out on the streets and getting his ass kicked. So then he turns to robbery. So he decides, you know what?

I'm just going to start robbing people and sticking knives at people's throats and asking for their money. Well, that doesn't last too long. He does get arrested for that. In June 1991, Chiang was caught and sentenced to two years in a labor camp. When Chiang was released in 1993, he was a different person. All right, so he comes out of the labor camp, which Chinese labor camp, that sounds pretty brutal. Yeah, we talked about it last week. There's not books.

They call them reeducation. camps. Right. But it's legitimately just your breaking rocks, motherfucker. So after this, he starts teaming up with different people. He starts getting these partners. So they would team up the two of them and then they'd have these robberies where they'd stick people

up with their knives. Did they have cool finishing moves? They didn't have cool finishing moves. This was before Mortal Kombat, I believe. It's kind of like the Joker though. He was just teaming up with different guys and he wanted to be like the leader of it. And eventually he built a team

and they went on a crime spree together and they were they were going around just yeah just burglarizing and robbing people and uh i always wanted one of those a crime spree team yeah that'd be fun wasn't like just a bunch of guys like if you're going down you're going down with your buds yeah yeah i think uh you should also film that and put it on facebook cool i just might and listen and i'll i see i would like to apologize that you're not invited that's fine it's all you it's really the club feet you're not going to be able to get away oh you think i'm not fast enough you think that's the problem okay fair enough i don't know what you're capable of so now he's got a group of people

together and they're robbing people and uh if you get held up do they have a cool name group of people who want your money you should probably say yes or bad things will happen on one night at around 10 p.m they entered south lake park and located a couple in a secluded area the men demanded that the couple hand over their money. But they refused. At this point, Qiang and his accomplices pulled out their knives and some rope.

They tied the couple together and started to stab them, eventually tossing them into the lake before making their escape. So if I'm in this gang, if I'm in this group, we tie these people up, now we can take their money

and then they're like, hey, we should stand them to death too. I'd be like, no, I don't think we need to stab to death, guys. No, no, we got the money. We got the money. We're good. They're like, no, I think we should probably start stabbing them to death. You know what, Carl? I take it back. You can be in the gang. Yeah, see? There might be a day when we need a voice of reason like you. Guys, we might need it.

We might need a murder everyone. We, we're going to need a level head like you around. Well, Chiang was not a level head because this got him very excited about what would be his future. A few nights later, the men went out again hungry for more. They found a couple walking in youth park. The men surrounded the couple and Chang hit the mail over the head. head with a large stick. Whilst his accomplices searched the man's pockets for money, Qiang dragged the woman to some nearby bushes and raped her, hitting her and leaving them both for dead.

All right, so now Chang is like, I know that we're just robbing these people, but also I'm probably going to rape one of them. So that's part of this now, too. Uh, the bushes, nature's bedroom. Why don't you guys go get a bushes? Oh boy. All right.

So this went on for a couple of years until 1996 when he was arrested for robbery and he lied to the police and he said, oh yeah, what I do is I dress up as a police officer and then I tell people that they got to give me their stuff. So they arrested him and they gave him three more years in a labor camp. During this stint, by the time he got out,

he had decided, I'm no longer working with other people. I need to do this solo. Chiang was released on the 4th of December, 1998, six months early for good behavior. Oh, good behavior. He headed to South Canal in Shenyang, where he attacked a woman with a large branch and raped her at the side of a river. Only three days later, he would attack again, attacking a woman with a metal bar and rape her too. He was really saving up that good behavior.

Oh, it's nice that the one was by the river. That's kind of nice, a little romantic. Nice view. I'm sure it smells great, too, in China. Oh, no. Just being raped to watching terns flow past you. Well, yeah, and I don't think they have an EPA over there. No.

The amount of pollution. Anyway, so the first year out of the second stint in a labor camp in prison, whenever you want to call it, and he has a pretty good year. If this was a rookie year, these would be numbers that were like future Hall of Fame numbers. All right. He would later recall that within his first year of release,

He committed more than 20 attacks, leaving at least 12 dead, and raping seven or eight women. He said that he could have killed more, but he never checked on them. And he never watched the news, so he didn't actually know how many he killed from all of the attacks. So that's pretty interesting. This is a guy who's going around killing people, raping them, and he doesn't even care. He's like, that person survived? I don't know. Whatever.

I'm out of the next thing. That's interesting because most of these guys, like, remember everything. Oh, yeah. Oh, they're into it, too. They're proud of themselves when it's all of a sudden done. This guy's like, I don't know, probably 12 could have been more. I attacked a bunch of people, so something like that. Michael Daly just called you out.

He goes, EPA thought Carl was a libertarian. Yeah, well, the EPA did serve. It actually helped us out at a certain time and now it's just gotten out of control. That's not the point. That's not the point, though. Let's talk about this guy. He would just go on sprees, man. He would like have wild weekends.

Like this one. Many of these would be in succession. One such spree would be on the 9th, 10th, and 11th of May. In these three days, he killed six men and raped two women. God, I'm not going to lie. I get a little lancy, you know, beginning of spring too. Yeah, right? You know how to get out of the house, do something?

But when you do get those three-day weekends, I feel like I always squander them. You know, you come back to work. What did you do? I'm like, oh, my God, it just flew by. I just relaxed the whole time. This guy's like, oh, I killed six guys and raped two women. I was, I was on point. So what happens is he's doing this, and it's all happening around the same time in the same area.

So the police decide, let's put some people in plainclothes. We'll get some plainclothes police down there, and we'll get to the bottom of who's doing this. Well, Chang, to his credit, recognizes that things are different. And he can feel that all of a sudden, like, wait a second, there's more people than they usually are. And things seem to be, like, in order a little bit too much. So he had to put things on pause for a little bit. Okay. But he couldn't put it on pause forever.

So eventually he found an opportunity. Even though the police were heavily investigating the crimes, Chiang could not help himself. In August, he found himself climbing a scaffolding structure. And on the second floor, he saw a woman sleeping in one room on a sofa. And in the room beside hers, around seven or eight men, they must have been labor workers. He silently crept in and hit her over the head and raped her. He would take what cash he could find and climb back down.

Only when he was there, a police car was waiting for him. He silently dropped the metal ball and his pig's knife behind his back and made his way to the police car. They asked him what he was doing. He told them that he was working for a local market and was unloading vegetable trucks. The police searched him but found. found nothing and told him to go home.

Oh boy, these Chinese police, in every one of these cases that we've been researching here, just bungle up everything. This guy's a real Jeff Jarrett, just hitting everybody over the head. Yeah, I know. Fucking Al-Kabong over here. Oh. So, again, the police have had multiple chances at this guy. He just keeps getting out of the labor camps and keeps getting away with this shit.

Until finally, I got to say that this. is what makes him the winner this week of the creep off you don't know that month i'm calling my shot vini later that month he would break into a chicken farmhouse and find three people sleeping inside a teenage girl and her parents chiang took a pickax from inside the farm and used this to kill the girl's parents before going into her bedroom and striking her in the head. He would then take her body outside and have sex with her corpse, committing necrophilia. Oh, necrophilia. Okay. That's a pretty creepy behavior there, Biddy. That's what you got? Yeah, that's what I got. So he fucked a dead teenager. And you're like, oh, that's nothing.

This guy fucked a dead teenager. Okay. In 2003, the police picked up this guy who stole a motorcycle. Yeah. And that was an old buddy of Chang's back when he was. teaming up with people, the guy dropped a dive on him. Get the fuck out. And they caught him with that information that his buddy gave to the police. I'm sorry, man, but they got me with the motorcycle.

Yes. Oh, my God. So, between January 95 and July of 2003, there were 45 total murders, 10 total rapes. November 15th, 2005, they shot him in the back of the head. They brought him into a room and just, phew. That seems like a

really messy way. to kill someone. They told him he was going to be made. Yeah, right. They walked him in a door. They put him in his Sunday best. He kissed his mom. Can't kill a maid guy.

That's the problem. So Wang Chung is the creep this week. Vinny, what do you got, buddy? My creep today. His name is by Ning Yang. He's 18 years old. We're going back to 2006. Now, young kid, a bit of a problem in his neighborhood.

He doesn't really have a job. just kind of floats around the neighborhood. He has a dad, he has a family, but, you know, he just kind of does his own thing. And he kind of was into the school teacher. Okay. And an illegal kindergarten. What's any legal kindergarten?

Exactly. What are they teaching them, like, that communism is bad? Is that what makes anything like that? I think they teach women there. Oh, not cool. I don't know. I don't know what they do to make it illegal. They let women go to school and shit, don't they?

Well, they do. They do. But one of the things that we should point out here before we get too far into this is one of the things I mentioned to you when we were talking before the show is that in China, they had a bit of an epidemic with school violence kind of the same way we do in America, except you really can't get guns over there. Right. So these motherfuckers get creative when they get very, very upset. So I guess they had to crack down on these, like, illegal private schools. I don't know what they were teaching, probably stuff that wasn't approved by the government or something like. like that. Yeah. It definitely wasn't critical race theory. That's for sure. No, it was not.

We weren't teaching that. It was absolutely not. So one day our boy by is walking down the street and he walks on a private property and he's just kind of walking through it. And it was a freshly paved road that he was walking on. There is no private property in China, but God. Well, that's the way this is worded from the, uh, from the articles. Yeah. That the government has allowed us in the West to read. Now, the man was on a lovely villa that was owed by a farmer as he was skipping down this private property. Lush with crops. He got yelled at. The dude was like, hey, fucker, I just paved that. Get off of that. And by snapped, bro. He fucking snapped. He went to the village and he waited for the farmer to come to the village. He hid around and then he jumped out of nowhere

and tried to murder him with two knives. The guy got away, but he chased him through the fucking town. You need one hand to grab the guy and hold him. That's why you don't kill him with two knives. It's hard to just go, ah, just the one knife. Yeah, two knives makes it more difficult. I knife at you. Yeah, so this guy's an idiot.

Okay. Yeah, oh, he's not, he's 18. He's not a smart kid. He was just so upset at this guy, but he tried to assault him and they tried to subdue him, but this kid's fucking slippery. He got the fuck, got the fuck away. Okay. So, but he was identified.

People are like, oh, that's that dude. It's by, we know where his dad is. So they go get his dad and they go to hunt him down. And when they find him, they kind of all corner him like, yeah, man, you need to come with us. You try to kill a dude today. We need to talk. Well, he again, escapes the crowd and grabs a five-year-old child. Dude, where did he go?

He's the fucking gingerbread man, this kid. He gets the fuck away. He grabs a five-year-old child and holds a knife to his throat, holds him hostage. Like, you're never going to take me, see. And that's the way the news goes. And dude, like the wind, he's gone again. No shit. They don't see

him for two days. Okay. He's in love with the school teacher. The kindergarten teacher. The kindergarten teacher. How old is she? I don't know. Is she hot? Did you find a photo or anything? She might have been. All right. Fair enough. So this escalates quickly,

Carl. Okay. On the morning of May 8th, 2006, about 9 a.m., by went to the classroom where she taught, it was on the second floor of some type of this building that I guess they had a whole school in. In the classroom, there were 21 kids and the teacher. Apparently she was kind of rejecting his advances and said, you need to leave.

Yeah. So he leaves for a minute. He comes back. But when he comes back, he brings his two knives. But he also brought something. else with him. A condom? No. Three gallon buckets of gasoline. Oh, okay. And a lighter. That's going to quickly. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, he's sitting there and he looks

at the kids. He gets them all, like, he's like, ha, everybody in the corner. They're all backed up against the wall. And he looks around, and he sees this one kid. And apparently he saw a kid whose parents he knew. And he's like, you, you can leave. Oh, nice. He was like, he literally was like, fuck you. Fuck you, fuck you, you're cool. And fuck you, I'm out. So, he lets the one kid go. Then he just starts throwing the gasoline on the teacher, on the children, and then between the children on the floor and between the door.

So they- What an asshole! Then he lights the lighter, drops it, setting them all on fire, Carl. Brutal. He set an entire kindergarten class on fucking fire. that's um if that happened here in the u.s i think they'd make fire illegal i'm pretty sure so on the scene two kids died 10 more died later okay teachers dead every all these kids are fucking burnt the fuck up the ones that survived and they could not find this motherfucker anywhere it took

800 police officers wow these people are incompetent these people suck at their jobs i hate to be the one to do it but they the cops were just like we got to find this guy he burned up the kindergarten class and they found him living in a fucking cave in the woods oh neat yeah he went camping after right yeah and uh they took him in a room and shot him in the back of the head all right good my dude set a kindergarten class on fire because someone told him to get off of his freshly paved street that's a good one minnie that's pretty fucking good one it's a good story buddy it's not a fun one not a fun one so if you're going to vote this this week, go to the creepoff.com and

please vote for by Ningyang the kindergarten cookout. That's good. All right. I mean, that's terrible. Yeah, I guess that is this week's contest. Carl, are you ready for some voicemails? I am ready for some voicemails. Well, the voicemail segment is brought to you by

our friends in Syracuse. The Creepoff voicemail segment is brought to by the city of Syracuse. An update to our new mask guidelines. Please wear a mask if you have COVID. If you are unbacked. vaccinated, or if you look like a typical Syracuse citizen. See you in Syracuse.

McBride, if you ever dial in another one of these, if you ever calling another one like that, you and me are going to talk. I need some good quality material here. He's had some good ones. We can let that one slide. McBride's like, I do tell jokes. Some better than others. First voicemail.

Question about the live show. Hey, creeps. It's the Chicago weed guy. So you guys are coming to Lombard, and I was wondering, you guys want to smoke weed? Let me know. I'll be back. Vinnie, you got an answer for that? Just come say hello.

And please identify yourself as the Chicago weed guy. Yes. When you introduce yourself, lead with that will be all ears. Oh, wait. He left a second voice mail. I forgot to mention Chicago Weed Guy yet, that I actually have a bunch of weed and would like to share in trust with you guys. I mean, the entire cast. Uh-huh, uh-huh.

And I'm already going to the event, so yeah, let me know. All right, see you guys. Cool. All right. Please identify yourself as a CWG. Yes. The Chicago Wii guy. Nice.

Hey, Carl, did you call in again? Hey, Vin, this is Carl. I just wanted to remind everybody to subscribe to WATP at patreon.com. Now, what I just released is episode 88, the band episode, where I trashed on helpless women and made them make me take down the the episode. Now, since I'm not on any other podcast, you should subscribe to my podcast and WATP Patreon.com. Get in, pal. Really, Carl? Sorry. You never, you don't, you fucking barely talk about the creep off on your show. I know. But you're calling into this one just to leave WATP

Patreon. Well, you think that's annoying. You called in to the WATP hotline. Well, somebody had to plug the creep off. Hey, Cole. This is Vinny. Man, these creeps, really do get grind my gears i can barely sleep thank god that you gave me to link to newcom dot com slash w a tp so i can get more restful sleep in a shorter amount of time i veney really do love this product see you soon karl thanks vini i appreciate you trying them out it's partners dot newcom dot com slash k a r l n-u-c-l-m is the name of the product is how it's spelled New. Don't interrupt me, cunt. But anyway, thanks for, I'm glad

you're enjoying the product. Thanks. Me, you fat loser. And Carl, you club foot loser. At this point, the cheating isn't even isn't even the person who is cheating's fault. It's your fault. Take, I don't know,

$100 from your Patreon and give it to some Indian on fiber who knows how to do HTML and CSS. And give them to make you a real website so that way you don't have all these cheaters. You're fucking retarded

both of you, especially Vinny. No, especially Carl. He makes a point at the end there. That's funny. All right. Hey, Viddy, and just listen to the last recent episode, and I've got

to say you might want to learn how to mix your sound. I was trying to listen to your stats on your guy. I couldn't hear it over the fucking organ. So I'm going to have to go for Carol this time. Sorry about that, bud. Have a good day.

I was busy. Don't you know C.M. Punk is back. Drink. Drink. All right. I got a note from one of our long-term fans that I couldn't play on WATP. I couldn't play this on the Gateway Show. I have to play it on.

I'm the real deal show. The W-A-T-P, what's up, Carl? Just kind of let you guys know that I actually can't be a part of the show anymore. I got a girlfriend. She's eating up all my fucking time. This is, uh, this is goodbye. I can't call in anymore.

Keep it up, though. You guys are great. Don't call me back. I hate when that happens, man. People get involved in their relationships, and then they can't participate. Oh, wait, he called back. He called back.

Fucking hell is up on this shit. Don't you fucking run away from me, dude. Go, let me! All right. Hey, uh, What's up, Carl? I want to let you guys know that, um, that relationship didn't work out.

So I could be part of the show again. Oh, good. Call me back. James obsolete. He's back. That's good. He then called back again, I think. maybe he was feeling bad about something

I don't ever want to hear you say I have a boyfriend because I need a girlfriend all right so he's got a lot of free time now which is great I'll be back to get the show seven months worth of back bacon

now I have what poor voice mail this is a suggestion for the wheel Carl Okay. Hi, I'd like to rename Anonymous. I got an idea for that wheel of nonsense you guys got there. The loser has to come to my, I mean, Sutter in John's apartment and get rid of all the cockroaches. And I also bring some beer.

Okay. Sounds good. Yeah, wouldn't that be a fucking great consequence if you have to show up at his house with like an exterminator back? I'm into it, man. Oh, by the way, did you see that the guy who was living in Florida was going to buy a cockroach costume and go to John stand-up. He ended up not going because he didn't want to pay for the tickets.

But I thought they were copped. I thought they were free anyway. But he was saying he didn't want to pay the 50 bucks. I guess you have to buy food and drink later there. Carl. It's like, dude, we would have chipped in for that. Are you kidding me? Carl is a very generous man sometimes.

He would have taken care of it. I would have taken care of that. If you have an opportunity to troll that hard. Yes. If I got video of you wearing a cockroach outfit at a Suttering John stand-up show? Old hamburgers got deep pockets kids. Oh, for that? For that type of stuff, hell yeah.

Little tiny shoes, deep pockets. I think even Dr. Steve might get involved in that one. So Dr. Steve's coming to do the show in a couple weeks. He is, yep. We haven't scheduled. Yeah. So listen, can we talk about what we're going to do next week? Because we're going to be on the road.

Yes. You're going to be traveling next Monday. I'm going to be hanging out in Chicago. Okay. So what I'm thinking of doing is this. Tell me what you think. I'm spitball in here. I'm spitball in live.

I think for the regular creep off listeners, we're going to pull a WATP and give you one of our bonus episodes that will put on our normal time in the feed for you to check it out. People love it when you do that. Give away the content they paid for. They love it. But check this out. Check this out.

Yeah, I'm listening. All of you patrons, Dick Masterson is going to be hanging out with us in the Airbnb. Yeah. I'm going to put together a scum stream and we're going to record a scum stream while we're in Chicago. So wait, you're going to do two scum parades in one day? Why not? One's for the patrons. uh one's for the patrons and then ones for uh the live show hey man i'm forward if we can make it happen

i think i can make it happen okay but we're gonna do our best either way folks i apologize and then we actually actually that's interesting so if we did record that so i think the only time we're going to have with with dick and everyone is going to be saturday morning ish so if we did record that saturday morning we put that out on the creep off patreon let dick put it out on his patreon too so that he's getting some value out of it yeah and it'll just be exclusive kind of for people who subscribe to those shows. I love it. Okay.

Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. And then we just release a bonus episode to everybody else. But you patrons, you get special, fun, new content. Okay, cool. So everybody else, we love you. You're still going to get something, but you got to forgive me. Your boy, Vinnie's sick. I can't do everything.

I'm sick. I'm not doing it well. Please. He's doing everything. Give me a break. He's doing everything. Give me a fucking break. All right.

Very good, Vinny. Let's try to do that then. Let's do a scum parade. Oh, yeah. You probably want me to play a drop now. since we're going into the scum parade do it watch out for the scum parade oh no it's the scum parade

for the scum parade making minnie's day day if you're coming to the live show in Chicago and you want to make my day come visit me over at the merch table get yourself a creep off poster bucks they're beautiful full color their color posters very nice very nice i got a pride of signing

the word hamburger you're not going to do just the kh that's a dude you are someone who could get away with just putting carl yeah i think you could carl and then i'll put my jersey number and then write hall of fame yeah all right cool yeah what is your jersey number did you ever play an organized sport i did i heard you trying to brag that you played soccer did you get like pleats at a build a bear how the fuck did you play soccer you saving that one up in it that's not bad no i was just listening to it i went he's playing soccer not bad with those fucking abominations in your feet i scored a goal in lucer in switzerland all right how was that for a little humble brag action i we played in

england in germany and austria and switzerland when i was a teenager who's we my team and myself we traveled over to europe and played a bunch of games and you scored a goal I did. Uh-huh. I didn't know that the Special Olympics traveled. Here we go. They let us play against kids that were half our age. And we won't a game.

Yeah. Were you like Traybert karate? I was number nine anyway was my jersey number. I imagine the American soccer team was really great compared to the European kids. Oh my God. In England, they destroyed us. They beat the shit out of us. Now that we're talking about England, that's a wonderful segue into our first story today.

Burnley, England, a care home staff, raised the alarm after a spotting a man, incessantly exposing himself at the window. Okay. So he's basically going to the nursing home and giving the old people a show. Police are hunting the man who donned a clown mask and exposed himself at the nursing home. It sounds like he may have lost on the wheel of consequences somewhere. Right, yeah. All right. So there's a clown mask, there's girls' panties, what else can we about?

And a nursing home. Believe it or not, that's not what was on the wheel. What was on the wheel was a tri-meth. The tri-meth one, yeah. So the man who was dressed in women's underwear and wore a cloud mask. We've seen standing at the window and was performing a sex act on himself. He was blowing himself. No, it wasn't that.

So if I lived in a nursing home, I'd request this type of entertainment. They don't get fun stuff like this coming through all that. often. It's usually just some old woman at a piano singing songs from the 40. This guy's way better than the last clown. Right. Yes. And by the way, this could be an act. If he could make balloon animals with one hand, this would be an act you could take out of the road. Dude, I'm so glad Dorkles is okay. I'm so glad Dorkles is so good. Dorkman got away with it. They can't find the guy. It's great. They have no idea who is. He's on the loose. He's on the loose right now.

So if you're in England and you have any information on, uh, A dorkerkels A clown mask jerking off In front of a window It's fucking amazing Why can't we Why can't they export that That's a fun crime

That's a funny fun crime Yeah You're a creep but it's funny If he gets arrested And I'm in that jail I'm high-fiving this motherfucker When he comes in Like wait you're the cloud guy

Yeah Well not that don't high-fiving with that hand You're gonna walk in and they're like My grandma lives there motherfucker My grandma says you got a huge hog congratulations my grandma says you can suck your own dick no when they said a sex date that himself i know i'm joking i'm making it up that a cloud sucked his own dick in front of senior citizens it's funnier carl i'm assuming

it's more like jacking it jacking it jacking it spikein it spike it smack but you're right it is funnier when clouds are sucking their own dick yeah man that old trope i think we need to work that into our logo cloud sucking its own dick it's fucking funny man I'm going to start a rap group that's called clown sucking their own dicks where clown makeup will be the ICP rival game. Well, they're retiring. ICP's retired. Are they really?

Yeah, what's his one? The fat one. He's sick. Are they going to wrestle still, I hope? Me too. Drink. God bless him. So you're ready to have a good time.

We're still in England, I believe. Yeah. October 2018, we're going to go back a little ways of this story. A horse owner was mortified. to find her grandson standing behind her horse with his pants around his ankles. The grandmother was not the only family

member to see it. The kid's name was Nicholas Sardo and he fucked the animal in the field in front of his grandmother and his aunt. His aunt told police that she saw him naked below the waist as he pressed up against the pet's backside. In the affidavit cede by the Daily Star

states that they called the police out to her home in... Oh, I'm sorry, this is Florida. This is uh yeah oh shit i'm an idiot it says look at the wrong thing the unemployed florida man is the way they described it i'm thinking how many stories would come up if you googled the unemployed florida man it's a nice qualifier it is a nice qualifier i agree i agree unemployed florida man sets you up for a fun story every time the document say sarto admitted to his aunt toady that he had fucked jacky g the miniature horse four times that week yeah but he said listen

Aunt Tony I wore protection He did He put out a rubber He wasn't, I'm not gonna get the horse pregnant Well, I don't need to worry about it Protect himself from STIs Does he know something about the horse's past

That we doubt Obviously Nick's like I've seen who you've been with I'm putting on a rubber Well grandma went out there originally To find out who the horse was fucking again It's like, duh She's out there banging again

And then the aunt came out there Saw him fucking her and she was like Get a stable And they all shared a laugh It was a good line The horse return and went Hey So wait

He was fucking an ass In the ass What an ass You know That's That's a joke That's a lot of layers Right

Because That's a good joke So this guy is just Fucking hopeless It just goes to show you though Vinny Love Always finds a way

So this happened in 2018 So he spent one month and 24 days in jail. Since then, he's gotten himself into a little more trouble. They found that he was possessing more animals in his house. He's not allowed to own animals. He's not allowed to own animals. No. No.

I don't think it was a pony. It was probably something a lot smaller, which, according to him, it's a nice change of pace, tighter. The second incident that he got in trouble for, apparently he attacked an old woman in his street, and he dragged her down the street. street by her hair. 73-year-old woman. Yeah, screaming up going to kill you. Yes, because she was going to call the police on him, right?

Yep, yep. She was going to call the police on him. He doesn't like that. Yeah, he does not like it when the police get involved in his love life. Would you? No. No. So, yeah, that is Nicholas Sardo. He's in a little bit of trouble.

We'll find out what happens. Now, this is a fucked up story. A medical student disguised himself as a woman. Before throwing acid in the face of a junior doctor he had started. with. A guy by the name of Malad Rhoff, don a mask and sunglasses before throwing the corrosive substance over Dr. Rimm-Alawai, who is in her 20s on the doorstep of her home in Brighton on May 20th. Well, on the run, Rof discarded the items of his costume and bins across the city of Sussex before buying new clothes from Primark, which I guess is a store there. Officers later

examined hours of clothes captured TV footage to follow all of his movements, discovering he had heavily disguised himself as a female to carry out the attacks, and a search of his home in Cardiff also found items matching the clothing he bought, as well as a handwritten list of the items included in his disguise. A handwritten list. How quaint is that? It's usually like the Google search history. This guy's like, oh, welcome, officer. Thanks for coming. Uh, so here's some pretty damning evidence that I wrote up for you also. Fucking England, man. I liked that blouse so much that I bought two of them. So I have a matching blouse over the one I discard when I was running from the crime scene.

This guy should have just put out a clown mask. Jesus is great. Why is it those elaborate ruse of putting on makeup, it looks like a woman. That's not a good disguise. Just put on a clown mask. It might be part of the kink. But I also find it really fucking strain.

This person didn't think that cameras would see them just like stripping off the disguise. Yeah. It's just like the end of like an oceans movie where they just got away with the heist. But in this case, the heist was throwing acid in your ex's face. And he's just like stripping off be like, yeah got it

they didn't explain that they were ever had a romantic relationship they didn't I'm just guessing yeah I don't know something weird is going on they said that explain what happened they said that he was wearing sunglasses and a mask and then sprayed her with the liquid in the face causing irreversible burns yeah

they actually call it in their life changing injuries which usually I would think change is good but when you hear life changing injuries that's never a good thing that's never like yeah I've been upgraded so we don't even know what happens she's probably fucking burn out of the eyeball or two

it's pretty horrific if you ask me anybody I think that's creepy behavior this resulted in a guilty plea and he'll be sentenced on October 7th handwritten list what a fucking moron yeah I mean my god you can't have a proper asset attack

without a handwritten list also once you're done purchasing the items go ahead and throw the list away you don't need it anymore it's just evidence I like to file these things in case I ever decide out doing a second asset attack fucking idiot Alright so uh carl you tease something on wATP I did and uh our creep we got a hometown boy right now

We got a hometown boy Lance Mitchell Who I graduated high school with I was friends with speaking of soccer I played soccer with this guy and his younger brother Did you all go to Europe together? I can't remember if Lance was this in Europe or not I don't think so But, so him and his older sister, Dawn, who I also knew. So we were pretty close with the Mitchell family. And this past Friday, friends of mine from high school, send me a link to a local news article that these two have been up to some shenanigans.

I guess back at the end of May, their stepfather went missing. Okay. And they were on the lookout for the stepfather. You know, everybody gets very concerned when the stepdad goes. missing well i checked my buddy lances facebook because we're friends on facebook and he was right up there going if anyone has any information about the whereabouts of my stepfather please call 911 we got to the bottom of okay you know he's broken up okay so i don't know if you want to read the story but they discovered that his remains were burned in a fire pit on his property so

the father the stepfather's name was william charles mason he went by bill mason Bill Big Bill Mason They discovered him in the fire pit His cremated remains basically Right They had a very intense fire Right Now your boy Lance and his sister

Dawn have both been charged with second degree murder What they have at the moment on them Is that there was a fire That people have proof of The day around the time that the guy went missing And then they have afternoon well into the night time this fire was going yeah and then they have basically cremated remains removed from the fire pit that matches DNA right so they're arrested all right his their

lawyer is going they're grasping at straws here yeah another guy went to high school with by the way his attorney it's so it's such a weird story for me because it's like always like weird gossip that someone from spencerport is actually was admitted to the bar yes and the other guy from spence report decided that he wanted to work with him on purpose. I don't get it either, but it seems like a really bad idea. Well, when you're that desperate, he must be guilty. All right, so you're ready for this? I haven't

have an insider with some inside information. Now, are you going to be spreading salacious gossip right now? Yes. Correct. This is, no one's reporting on this information, and I'm going to tell you that it is gossip. I'll say this. The person who gave me this information has never been wrong about anything she's ever told.

Oh, salacious gossip time. She's not a lot of times. Congratulations gossip time with Carl. I am going to read you the text that my friend sent me. I'm going to leave out some of the things that might identify who this person is. But she says, so Dawn has lived in the house behind. Oh, this is the other part of the information that we needed to lay out there. Their mom who was married to Bill.

Hore. Because obviously, you know, that's their stepdad. She passed away last November. So she has just recently passed. Okay. All right. Was there a. inheritance or anything like that. Well, so listen to us. So Dawn has lived in the house behind

her mom slash Bill's house on their property for free for the last 20 years. Okay. So Dawn, the 46-year-old daughter, is living rent-free. So she, she likes that situation. Sure. Lance lives in a house not too far that his dad gave him, his real dad, biological. So Mary Ellen, the mom, passed away from cancer. and Mary Ellen and Billy had a son together who was about 28 lives in Pennsylvania. He's married, has a couple of kids. All right. So now, Bill's, he has family now.

He has grandkids in Pennsylvania. Right. So Mary Ellen, who's from this area, well, they're both from this area, but Mary Ellen passes away. Bill decides to sell the house and everything and move to Pennsylvania to be closer to his son and grandkids. You know, he's retired now. He's 69 years old. He's retired. He's decided I want to just spend time with the grandkids.

He told Don, she would need to find a. place to live. The weekend, this happened that he went missing. Okay. He had a house sale to sell to sell everything. Lance and Dawn weren't happy. They weren't getting mommy's money. And also, Lance's ex, who I also went to high school with, was getting remarried that weekend. So my friend is speculating that Lance might have been in a fucking rage. Like, his ex is getting remarried. His stepdad's taking all their money and then where his sister lived and he's taking it all down to Pennsylvania. Does he think sister's coming to live with him? maybe.

So his sister did move in with Lance. Oh, oh, they're sharing a cell? Right. Yes. So, so this is interesting.

So she says, I'm not 100% sure how they killed him, but supposedly Dawn ran him over with a car. Then they put him through a wood chipper before burning him on the property. Fuck yeah. Dude,

this is insane. This is a kid I went to high school with. We were friends. He put his stepdad through a wood shipper. And the reason why they knew it was him. Fucking Fargo style. Fargo style. And that's got to be so,

that's got to be a mess. How do you fucking clean that out? That's going to be a mess. So apparently the reason why they were able to identify him is because he had a knee replacement and the metal pieces were in the fire pit that still had like the serial number on them. So they could identify exactly who this knee replacement belonged to. Oh shit How fucking crazy is that

No that's true though Because like my mom had her hip replaced And so she That's why you haven't killed her yet Because they'll be able to identify the body Yeah they'll know They'll know Yep

If it wasn't for that goddamn hip No one would suspect her sweet sweet boy So yeah Until they listen to 60 hours of the creep off That's all they would do in court Is just play episode after episode We should bring this Carl guy in for questioning too now listen to him sing as this child is screaming as a dentist tortures him yeah all right so that's the

story that's the inside scoop and fucking wood chipper bro let's keep a close eye on this one this is interesting stuff by the way i want to say my sister-in-law chrissey who's uh active in the discord she's probably on youtube now she usually is uh thank you for the t-shirt yes thank you for the t-shirt i got mine got my new creep-off t-shirt thank you for that But Chrissy also graduated with me from this class. So we had a fun conversation about it yesterday over at my folks' house. So this is quite the news story, man. This is something else.

I'll be keeping a pretty close eye on this. I said this on WTP, but it's so funny how Mike Boudet told me, you know, Carl, there's a lot of people that you know who turn out to be murders. You don't even know about it. I'm like, no, there aren't. Shut up. And then a week later, it's like, okay, yeah, maybe he was right. Never brought.

I had a teacher murder his parents. really yeah a teacher yeah how old were his parents well he was like uh an iraq like vet and he wasn't kind of okay he wasn't okay and he was having like flashbacks and shit okay and uh he was living at home and he was like working as a teacher and i he was young he was a young dude yeah and uh he fucking went nuts one night and fucking murder them with a baseball bat wow yeah huh so you're saying that the iraq war was um mistake. Is that what you're trying to say? At least the second one. I would imagine. The second one wasn't a good move, man. Yeah, but Afghanistan worked out well,

so at least we have that. Agreed. USA. USA. We're a great country. Now, ladies and gentlemen, don't forget to vote this week at the creepoff.com. We will be back with a bonus episode next sometime this week, and you're going to get a, I haven't decided which episode we're going to release. Any suggestions, Carl? Should we do the, we should probably do that one, the scuba, stream one we did do a scum stream okay i was thinking maybe we could do a lot of fun yeah i don't want to give away any kaya and jesska yanov's stuff oh yeah those are good those are too good you gotta you got you got to ante up if you want the good stuff if you want the pamperchew if you want that you got an

up all right cool patreon dot com back slash the creep off we are going to be back thanks you're giving me monday off by the way that's awesome oh dude i you're traveling it's a travel day i'm to be asleep. Right. I'm going to be asleep. But looking forward to the live show and looking forward to meeting the creepos and especially Carl's Cuzzlews at the live show. If you're part of being on, you know, Cardiff Electric and I have made up,

it's a possibility that I can forgive and we can get along. We'll see. I will hug all of you, Cuzzaroos. I love you all as if you were members. So many watch you nowhere near them, apparently. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I'm thinking about changing the name, Vianon.

The whole Q thing is over. It's negative connotation, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It seems like you're an asshole if you're part of Vianna. I think we might be the Creep Foundation. Interesting. All right. You want to rebrand?

You're going to do a rebrand on me? I might. I'm thinking about it. The Creep Foundation sounds pretty good. You keep thinking about it. All right. So please send your photoshopps of clowns blowing themselves to Carl. And that's that.

We'll see you when we get back from Chicago. And our next live in studio episodes, it's going to be with Dr. Steve. so. Oh, is that true? Yeah, man. And that's going to be on a Wednesday. It is going to be on a Wednesday. So we will be back with you guys. We're going to go have some fun with you guys who care enough to come see us live. We're going to have a blast with you. Yeah. And if you're thinking about it and, you know, pull the trigger. WATP Live.com. Ticket started at 20 bucks a seat. So what's the worst that can happen? They already locked up Lewinsky. Remember, it's nice to be important. It's more important to be nice. Gagia. Chow Bella. Drops got me every time. They do. I love it. I love it. Fuck you. Fuck you.

Fuck you. You're cool. You're cool. This is stupid!