The Daily Stoic - Do You Have This Too? | The Sphere of Choice
Episode Date: January 6, 2026They knew that life was tough. They knew that a fragile person would not survive. But does that mean the Stoics were unfeeling? Utterly disconnected? Harsh and invulnerable?🎙️ Inter...view mentioned: Donald Robertson: Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube📓 Pick up a signed edition of The Daily Stoic Journal: 366 Days of Writing and Reflection on The Art of Living: https://store.dailystoic.com/👉 Support the podcast and go deeper into Stoicism by subscribing to The Daily Stoic Premium - unlock ad-free listening, early access, and bonus content: https://dailystoic.supercast.com/🎥 Watch the video episodes on The Daily Stoic YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@DailyStoic/videos✉️ Want Stoic wisdom delivered to your inbox daily? Sign up for the FREE Daily Stoic email at https://dailystoic.com/dailyemail🏛 Get Stoic inspired books, medallions, and prints to remember these lessons at the Daily Stoic Store: https://store.dailystoic.com/📱 Follow us: Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, TikTok, and FacebookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Welcome to the Daily Stoic Podcast, where each day we bring you a stoic-inspired meditation
designed to help you find strength and insight and wisdom into everyday life.
Each one of these episodes is based on the 2,000-year-old philosophy that has guided some of
history's greatest men and women help you learn from them.
to follow in their example and to start your day off with a little dose of courage and discipline
and justice and wisdom. For more, visitdailystoic.com.
They were tough. They knew that life was tough. They knew that a fragile person would not survive.
They also knew back in the days of ancient Rome that life was fragile, that even tough people could be cut down by disease or events or a tyrant.
So yeah, there was a gruffness to the Stoics, a weariness of getting too close or too attached, lest your heart be broken by fortune.
But does that mean that the Stoics were unfeeling, utterly disconnected, harsh and invulnerable?
hardly. In his fascinating biography of Marcus Aurelius, which you can grab from the painted porch,
and he's discussed it on the podcast many times, Donald Robertson takes pains to note a virtue
exhibited by Marcus Aurelius' incredible mother, Lucilla, and he refers to her natural affection.
While the mothers of many emperors before him were ambitious and cruel, she was kind and generous
and genuinely loved by her own children, Marcus, Donald writes, came to agree with Fronto,
his rhetoric teacher, that generally speaking, those among us who are called patricians are rather deficient
in precisely this quality. Both Marcus and Fronto Donald point out use the word that Paul would
use in the Bible, which he used to say that Christians were to be kindly affectionate to one another
with brotherly love. The Stoics loved and were loved. They honored their parents. They played with their
children. And this is exactly how one would describe Cato's relationship to his brother who lived
very differently than he did, just as it would describe Marcus with his stepbrother Lucius Veris,
who was also quite different. The Stoics were kind. They cared about people, and not just people
they were related to, but all humankind. I'm at the office right now, but I'm at the office right now,
heading home. The family's at the house and we're already like, do I need to pick something up on the
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The Sphere of Choice.
And this is from this week's entry in the Daily Stoic Journal,
366 days of writing and reflection on the art of living by yours truly,
and my co-writer and translator Stephen Hanselman.
I actually do this journal every single day.
There's a question in the morning, a question in the afternoon,
and then there's these sort of weekly meditations.
As Epictita says, every day and night, we keep thoughts like this at hand,
write them, read them aloud, and talk to yourself and others about them. You can check out
the Daily Stoic Journal anywhere books are sold. You can also get a signed personalized copy from me
in the Daily Stoak store at store.dailystoke.com. If the first step is to discern what is
or isn't in our control, the second step in Stoic philosophy is to focus the energy on the things
we have a choice about. The Stoics viewed the soul as a sphere that when well-tuned, well-directed,
was an invincible fortress against any trial or circumstance.
Protected by our reason, this sphere of choice was like a sacred temple,
and it is the only thing we truly possess in this life.
We are the product of our choices, so it is essential that we choose well.
This week, consider and reflect on the choices you have about your emotions,
your actions, your beliefs, and your priorities.
Keep this thought at the ready at daybreak,
and through the day and night, there is only one path to happiness, and that is in giving up all
that is outside your sphere of choice regarding nothing else is your possession, surrendering
all else to God in fortune. Epictetus Discourses 4-4. Who then is invincible, the one who cannot be
upset by anything outside their reasoned choice? Epictetus Discourses 118. The soul is a sphere true to itself
It neither projects itself towards any external thing, nor does it collapse on itself,
but instead radiates a light which it shows itself the truth of all things and truth in and of itself.
Marcus Aurelius Meditations 1112.
Well, here we are.
We were talking about this last week.
You know, you only have so many energy points.
You only have so much, so many resources.
How are you going to spend them?
Are you going to spend them on what's up to you?
Or you're going to spend them on what's not up to you?
are you going to emote about things and pretend that that makes a difference or are you going to
spend your energy trying to do something about this thing that you found so upsetting right so
i think people think that that stoicism is about resignation it's not it's about allocation right
it's resigned to the things that make no difference where you can make no difference
but it's very focused, intensely focused on the areas that you can make a difference, right?
So you could despair about the larger, you know, political trends in your country because you're one person and you're, you know, at odds with the majority, but maybe you can make a difference with your family, with your community.
You could run for school board or mayor or something like that, right?
What can you do as the individual?
That's not to say the Stokes aren't interested in collective action.
I'm just saying, I'm going to focus my energy where it's going to make a difference.
And as a Stoics, they'd be indifferent to the things where I can make no difference, right?
Where can you make a difference, right?
You know, it gets tempting as a writer, right?
Because our job as a writer is to have opinions about things.
That's a really dangerous way to go through your life thinking that the world gives a shit about your opinion, right?
And that having the opinion is to think.
that matters. And it doesn't matter, right? What matters is what you do? What are the actions, right?
We ended the year with the idea from the Stokes about turning words into works.
Well, what are you providing? Where are you putting their resources and are you putting them
towards where they have input, where they have efficacy, right? So A Stoak has resigned in some sense
to, look, I'm not going to get involved in that nonsense. I'm not going to waste time regretting
the past either. What I'm going to try to do is move forward. What I'm going to try to do is move ahead.
what I'm going to try to do to make some change where I can make some change.
And yeah, I'm going to be indifferent to the things where that's not true.
And that's what we're talking about here, right?
That's what the sphere of choice is about.
And it's an easy thing to forget.
And that's why Epictetus is saying, keep it ready in the morning, think about it throughout
the day and think about it at night.
He's saying there's one path to happiness.
It's giving up the things that are outside your sphere of choice, focusing on what else is
in your possession, surrendering everything else.
So it's being zen about the things that are not up to you.
But there's a kind of invincibility in that zen, right?
Because if I didn't make the call, I didn't do it, if it wasn't something that was up to me,
I'm not going to get upset by it.
Remember Marks is saying, you don't have to have an opinion about this.
You don't have to get upset.
But you should be upset about your own choices.
Why did I do that?
Why didn't I do that?
Why did I, you know, why did I make this mistake?
Why did I do this thing again that I told myself I was going to stop doing?
Focus on you.
Focus on your choices.
Make good choices.
That's how you exert control over the world.
Something I, you know, I remind myself, you see what's going on in the world and you can
despair.
You can feel sad or you can go, look, I've got two little kids in my house who I'm responsible
for.
The biggest multi-generational impact I can have is in raising them well.
And then I go, and this is something.
Seneca fail. It's like Seneca spent all these years beating his head against the wall trying
to change Nero. He's affected far more people had far more impact in his writing, which he did
control. So I go, okay, and look, I'm not going to, you know, yell at some person I know on social
media for being silly and have the impact on one person, but I am going to sit down and write about
this or talk about this on the podcast in a way that can reach a lot of people, right? Let's stay in our
lanes. Let's do what we can do. Let's try to make a difference where we can. And if we all do
that, cumulatively, that is collective action. And that does have a big impact. So this is a short
lesson today. It's a straightforward one. But it's so hard. And that's why Seneca is saying you've got
to remind yourself constantly throughout the day. I'm going to focus on what's in my sphere of choice.
That's where I have impact. I'm going to focus on allocating my energy properly, not going to waste it on
regret, not going to waste it on bitterness, on resentment, on anger, on fear, on worry, on hope.
I'm going to focus on what I control. I'm going to make a difference there. That's what Stoic does.
Hey, it's Ryan. Thank you for listening to the Daily Stoic podcast. I just wanted to say we so
appreciate it. We love serving you. It's amazing to us that over 30 million people have downloaded
these episodes in the couple years we've been doing it. It's an honor. Please spread
the word, tell people about it, and this isn't to sell anything. I just wanted to say thank you.
