The Daily Stoic - Failure Doesn’t Define You—Neither Does Success | Always The Same
Episode Date: November 10, 2025Ulysses S. Grant knew what the Stoics knew—that outside circumstances don’t say anything about us, that it didn’t matter, as Epictetus said, what we bear, only how we bear it. 👉... Support the podcast and go deeper into Stoicism by subscribing to The Daily Stoic Premium - unlock ad-free listening, early access, and bonus content: https://dailystoic.supercast.com/🎥 Watch the video episodes on The Daily Stoic YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@DailyStoic/videos🎙️ Follow The Daily Stoic Podcast on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dailystoicpodcast✉️ Want Stoic wisdom delivered to your inbox daily? Sign up for the FREE Daily Stoic email at https://dailystoic.com/dailyemail🏛 Get Stoic inspired books, medallions, and prints to remember these lessons at the Daily Stoic Store: https://store.dailystoic.com/📱 Follow us: Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, TikTok, and FacebookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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success. Of course he was disappointed. It had been a long and hard fall. He descended from
West Point to second lieutenant during the Mexican-American War, but now Ulysses S. Grant was selling
firewood by the side of the road. He must have hoped that no one would recognize him and his
heart would have sank when Simon Buckner and old school and war buddy did. Could God, Grant, he
burst. What are you doing? But Grant decided he would not be ashamed. I am solving the problem
of poverty, he replied. Grant knew what the Stoics knew, that outside circumstances don't say
anything about us at all, that it didn't matter, as Epictetus said, what we bear, only how
we bear it. Grant was feeding his family. He was doing honest work. What was so bad about that?
After all, Cleanthes was a lowly water carrier in Athens, and proud of it. Now, had Grant been caught
stealing to support his drinking habit? That would have been different. Or if he'd accept it,
a Confederate commission because the pay was better. Again, that would be different. As I talked about
in my episode with Ron Chernow on the Daily Stoke podcast, who wrote one of his best biographies
about Grant, Grant understood this so-called menial work of selling firewood didn't say anything
about him. What he cared about was making an honest living and providing for his family. The position
didn't define him, and not only was this position temporary, but a few years later, he would be
become general of the Union Army, and a few years after that, President of the United States.
And yet again, Grant would refuse to let those high positions define him either.
As Marcus Reelius commanded himself, we must accept it without arrogance and let it go with indifference.
Like Grant, he saw that success and failure were meaningless. They were imposters.
A rock thrown in the air gains nothing by going up, he said, and nothing by falling down.
What matters is who we are. What matters is the character.
we live by.
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Always the same.
This is today's entry in the Daily Stoic.
Think by way of example on the times of Vespasian.
And you'll see all these things marrying, raising children, falling ill, dying, wars, holiday feasts, commerce, farming,
flattering, pretending, suspecting, scheming, praying that others die, grumbling over one's lot, falling in love, amassing
fortunes, lusting after office and power. Now that life of theirs is dead and gone, the times of
Trajan again the same. Marcus Aurelius' Meditations 4.32. And then the meditation. Ernest Hemingway
opens his book, The Sun also rises with a Bible verse. One generation pathus, and another generation
cometh, but the earth abideth forever. The sun also rises.
and the sun goeth down, and resteth to the place where he arose.
It was this passage, his fascinating editor, Maxwell Perkins, who I urge you to read about.
Perkins would say that it contained all the wisdom of the ancient world.
And what wisdom is that?
One of the most striking things about history is just how long human beings have been doing what they do.
Though certain attitudes and practices have come and gone, what's left are people.
Living, dying, loving, fighting, crying, and laughing.
Breathless media reports or popular books often perpetuate the belief that we've reached the apex of humanity or that this time things are really different.
The irony is that people have believed that for centuries.
Strong people have to resist this notion.
They know that with few exceptions, things are the same as they've always been and always will be.
you're just like the people who came before you and you're but a brief stopover until the people
just like you who will come after the earth abides forever but we will come and go and i mean i think
meditations itself is a remarkable demonstration of this probably not accidentally right
all the things that marcus is talking about complaining about worrying about you know seizing on
are immensely familiar and accessible to all of us, right?
2,000 years ago, you know, sometime in the year, let's say, 160 AD,
Marcus struggles to get out of bed and writes a passage about how he likes to huddle under the blankets and stay warm.
Exactly the same, right?
You think about the struggles Marcus Aurelius has with comidus.
Maybe that's what you're going through right now.
You think of Seneca trying to contain Nero telling himself,
You know, I'm one of the good guys. I'm one of the adults in the room. And you think about how politically people in the Capitol, which is named after Capitoline Hill, senators, right, same position as people like Seneca had, were telling themselves about the current president, right? The same thing over and over and over and over again. People are people places are places. I did a meditation on this. We did this road trip and we stopped in Tombstone, Arizona, which.
you know, it's the site of the gunfighted O.K. Corral. And what's fascinating, you walk down the streets of Tombstone.
And this is a place that's burned to the ground, have been rebuilt, to look historic for the most parts.
Some of the buildings actually are pretty old.
But the point is, these bars, what stickers do they have in the window?
The sticker is new.
That wasn't a technology in 1880 or whatever.
But they've got these stickers in the window.
What do the stickers say?
You can't carry a handgun inside this establishment, right?
Same sticker I have on the, you know, front of the painted porch.
But in the 1880s, that's what the gunfight at the OK corral was.
about. It was about whether people could openly carry guns in town. I'm not making a Second
Amendment argument here. I'm saying that people were fighting and arguing about the exact same thing,
just as the Earps had moved to Tombstone, Arizona. Why? To make their fortune, to make a
name for themselves, to have a better life, the same reason that maybe you're moving to Arizona or
Austin or Europe, right? It doesn't matter. People are people and they've always been doing the same
things. And I think what's so beautiful and reassuring but also humbling about Stoic
philosophy is these reminders that not that much has changed, that the hardware issues remain the
same, the software issues remain the same, despite all the updates and attempts to fix the bugs.
So we can calm down a little bit, right? People are people, places, or places, history is the same
thing happening over and over and over again. Time, as Matthew McCona Hay's character says,
in true detective, quoting Nietzsche, time is a flat circle. It's beautiful, as I said,
haunting, humbling, all these things at the same time. And it's something we can't lose track of,
and it's something we have to think about constantly. And when I hold meditations, that's what
I think of. I've actually got the leather edition right here in my hands. Since I got my first copy of
meditation. I've been going through that one. Like, I have a very worn copy has lots of notes in it.
I went through and I've been rereading it. It's on my nightstand. As I've been going through and
rereading it, what strikes me most is that I'm still making notes in the same spots about the same
things, just as other people have been doing for thousands of years. Maybe you have Seneca on your
nightstand just as Jefferson had Seneca on his nightstand when he died, just as, you know,
Cato died holding a copy of Socrates, right? It's a timeless tradition we're a part of both
intentionally and unintentionally. And there's something beautiful and terrifying in that.
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