The Daily Stoic - This Answers The Great Unanswered Question | Make Honesty Your Only Policy
Episode Date: October 14, 2025Those that don’t, or those that think they can go it alone, almost always fail.📖 Preorder the final book in Ryan Holiday's The Stoic Virtues Series: "Wisdom Takes Work": https://store.da...ilystoic.com/pages/wisdom-takes-work👉 Support the podcast and go deeper into Stoicism by subscribing to The Daily Stoic Premium - unlock ad-free listening, early access, and bonus content: https://dailystoic.supercast.com/📓 Pick up a signed edition of The Daily Stoic Journal: 366 Days of Writing and Reflection on The Art of Living: https://store.dailystoic.com/🎥 Watch video episodes on The Daily Stoic YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@DailyStoic/videos🎙️ Follow The Daily Stoic Podcast on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dailystoicpodcast✉️ Want Stoic wisdom delivered to your inbox daily? Sign up for the FREE Daily Stoic email at https://dailystoic.com/dailyemail🏛 Get Stoic inspired books, medallions, and prints to remember these lessons at the Daily Stoic Store: https://store.dailystoic.com/📱 Follow us: Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, TikTok, and FacebookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Welcome to the Daily Stoic Podcast, where each day we bring you a stoic-inspired meditation
designed to help you find strength and insight and wisdom into everyday life.
Each one of these episodes is based on the 2,000-year-old philosophy that has guided some of
history's greatest men and women help you learn from them.
to follow in their example and to start your day off with a little dose of courage and discipline
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It was baffling and horrifying even then.
He was one of the worst emperors in the history of Rome,
no small feat considering some of the deranged and incompetent people
who ascended to the purple over the centuries.
In the early 200s A.D., the ancient historian Cassius Dio wrote his Roman history,
and he, like us, was fascinated by the great unanswered question.
What happened to Cometus?
How did the son of a philosopher king, the son of Marcus Aurelius,
bungle things so badly that he was assassinated in real life by a gladiator and his statues torn down?
Dio's explanation is a good one, and a cautionary tale for all leaders and all of us.
Before Marcus Aurelius died and passed the throne to Cometus,
he set up what you might call a board of directors,
among whom were numbered the best men in the Senate.
Dio writes. Marcus knew firsthand how hard it was to step into a great man's shoes, the danger
of being Caesarified or dyed purple by the cloak of the emperor. He knew he was nothing without
Antoninus, Rusticus, Herodas Atticus, Fronto, Sinna, and Apollonius. And so there he was on his
deathbed arranging for the best and the brightest to similarly advise his son. But their
suggestions and counsels, Dio writes ruefully. Comedus rejected. And this, he believed,
was the critical difference between father and son. Marcus had admired how his stepfather
Antoninus would yield the floor to experts, and how that humility helped him fulfill his potential.
When he was emperor, Dio writes of Marcus, he showed no shame or hesitation about resorting
to a teacher. Comedus could not do this, and it cost him, and the Roman
human people. Nero, as it happens, is just another verse in the same sad story. A famous statue shows
Seneca giving a daily briefing to the emperor. You can see in Nero's body language, the slouched posture,
his hooded head, a soul and bored expression that he thinks he already knows everything, that he's
decided what he wants to do and what matters, and that sitting across from one of the wisest people
to ever live is totally lost on him. Of course Nero failed, spinning off the planet into delusion and
paranoia and fantasy.
There is a reason that companies have a board of directors.
Presidents have a cabinet and even a kitchen cabinet of informal advisors.
Athletes and actors have coaches, managers, agents, spouses.
And those that don't, those that think they can go it alone, almost always fail.
In Wisdom Takes Work, which is the new book.
You can pre-order it now, just a couple days left to do that.
We've got a bunch of awesome bonuses there, including some extra chapters.
chapters, manuscript pages. We've got signed numbered first editions. You can even have dinner with me.
We can talk about this over dinner in our own sort of informal strategy session. But in the book,
there are multiple chapters on the art of cultivating these teachers and mentors and advisors
because it is essential to leadership. Wisdom is not a solitary pursuit. It is a collective effort.
We need people to help us see where we are blind. We need them to serve as parents to our inner
children, a sounding board for our ideas, a check against our impulses. They expand our limited
experiences and education. They keep us from ending up like comedus or Nero. Wisdom, it does take
work, but that work is not only sitting alone with your books. It's cultivated in conversations,
in meetings, in late-night phone calls, even in criticism and arguments. One of the heroes of
Wisdom takes work is Abraham Lincoln, who would not have been able to succeed as president without
his team of rivals, a cabinet he deliberately assembled of brilliant individuals who often disagreed
with him, whose differing perspectives and differing skills profoundly shaped his agenda and
improved his ability to lead. In whatever position of leadership or followership we occupy,
we must be able to take counsel and suggestion from others, to yield to people with more knowledge
and experience, to resort to teachers and mentors and advisors. This is not just the path to
wisdom. It is wisdom, and it is work you must do. As I said, just a couple days left to pre-order
the new book. It's out on October 21st. Wisdom takes work is the fourth and final book in the Stoic
Virtue series. I'm so, so proud of it, and I can't wait for you to read it. Dailystoic.com
wisdom. Check it out.
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Make honesty your only policy. That's what we're journaling about in the Daily Stoic Journal.
that's where this little meditation comes from.
As Emperor Marcus Aurelius did not see the best of humanity,
leaders never do.
At court there would have been backbiting people who sold their friends out
when they saw an opportunity to advance themselves avarice and deceit.
He especially didn't like faux attempts at honesty.
His point, if you have to say, I'm going to be honest with you here,
what you're casually saying is that honesty is an exception for you and not the rule,
that you're making a special effort to tell the truth here because you usually don't.
And how sad is that? It's time to think about what these little statements say about us
and how to make sure that our default policy is honesty and straightforwardness.
And then the two quotes we have from Marcus Aurelius's Meditations and then from Seneca's moral
letters go as follows. How rotten and fraudulent when people say they intend to give it to you straight.
what are you up to friend it shouldn't need to be your announcement but be seen readily as if written on your forehead heard in the ring of your voice a flash in your eyes just as the beloved sees it all in a lover's glance in short the straightforward and good person should be like the smelly goat you know it when they're in the room with you i love that quote that's so great a calculated give it to you straight is like a dagger and there's nothing worse than a wolf befriending sheep we should avoid false friendship at all
costs, if you are good, straightforward, and well-meaning, it should show in your eyes and not
escape notice. That's from Marcus Aurelius' Meditations 1115. And then Seneca's moral letters,
109, he says, it is in keeping with nature to show our friends' affections and to celebrate
their advancement as if it was our very own. For if we don't do this, virtue, which is strengthened
only by exercising our perceptions, will no longer endure in us. Look, I think this idea that
honesty is your best policy is really important.
And obviously, we should cultivate a reputation for candor, for straightforwardness, for not holding back, for not being too-faced.
If you have an opinion, you put it out there.
You don't say one thing in private, another thing in public, right?
But I would say, you know, and we had Randall Stuttman on the Daily Stoak podcast and in the Daily Stoic Leadership Challenge.
And he did push back on this trend of radical candor, you know, that often it can be an excuse for being a jerk.
You know, the Stoics take their original roots from the cynics, you know, Diogenes, who sort of walks the streets of Athens, just saying whatever he thinks.
But I don't particularly admire him. I see him as sort of antisocial. So I think what Marcus is saying, cultivate a reputation for straightforwardness, this is in context of the other Stoic virtues.
It takes courage to be clear and to voice unpopular opinions and to say what people don't want to hear.
but it also takes moderation and an understanding of justice to know what opinions to voice, how to voice them, how not to be a jerk about them.
You know, radical candor in Wall Street firms, Randall was saying, is, again, often an excuse for asshole bosses to be more of a jerk.
And that's not the excuse they need.
We want to be both straightforward as well as restrained.
And I know that seems a little contradictory, but, well, life is complicated and it's about balance.
So when we say we want to be this smelly goat in the room
And someone who owns goats
Let me tell you, man, goats can stink
I can sometimes smell my neighbor's goats
He's like a half mile away
I'll catch a whiff of it in the wind
A male goat, this sort of musk they have, man, it is repulsive
It's disgusting
I don't think that's what Marcus is saying
I think he's being a bit exaggerated
He's just saying that, you know, these
I'm going to be level with you here
When we say, I don't mean any offense
or no offense intended, you can almost expect that the next words out of this person's mouth
are going to be really poorly thought out, not so nice things. And so I think we should take some
time here to think about this balance. This is what temperance is really about, right? Just in the way
that courage is a midpoint between cowardice and recklessness. I'd like to think that honesty
is a line somewhere between omission, not saying things, and saying too many things,
or something like to that regard. If you get what I'm saying, it's that, yes, we have to tell the
truth, but you don't have to tell someone that you find them repulsive today. You don't have to
tell them that you really hate the sound of their voice, right? There are things you can keep
yourself. And I guess I just wanted to add a little color to this week's meditation. So all things
in moderation, including this kind of honesty that we're talking about from Marcus Relius,
have an identifiable scent that you are an honest person, but don't be a stinky goat.
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