The Daily Stoic - You Have To Major In Your Majors | What Can Go Wrong… Might

Episode Date: April 1, 2024

✉️ Sign up for the Daily Stoic email: https://dailystoic.com/dailyemail🏛 Check out the Daily Stoic Store for Stoic inspired products, signed books, and more.📱 Follow us: Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, TikTok, FacebookSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you want to focus more on your well-being this year, you should read more and you should give Audible a try. Audible offers an incredible selection of audiobooks focused on wellness from physical, mental, spiritual, social, motivational, occupational, and financial. You can listen to Audible on your daily walks. You can listen to my audiobooks on your daily walks. And stillness is the key. I have a whole chapter on walking, on walking meditations, on getting outside. And it's one of the things I do when I'm walking. Audible offers a wealth of wellbeing titles to help you get closer to your best life and the best you.

Discover stories to inspire, sounds to soothe, and voices that can change your life. Wherever you are on your wellbeing journey, Audible is there for you. Explore bestsellers, new releases, and exclusive originals. Listen now on Audible. Hello, I'm Emily, and I'm one of the hosts of Terribly Famous, the show that takes you originals. Listen now on Audible. Short shorts? Free cocktails? Careless whispers? Okay, last one. It's not Andrew Ridgely. Yep, that's right. It's Stone Cold icon George Michael.

From teen pop sensation to one of the biggest solo artists on the planet, join us for our new series, George Michael's Fight for Freedom. From the outside, it looks like he has it all. But behind the trademark dark sunglasses is a man in turmoil George is trapped in a lie of his own making with a secret He feels would ruin him if the truth ever came out follow terribly famous wherever you listen to your podcast Or listen early and ad free on Wander E plus on Apple podcasts or the Wander E app or the Wandery app. And at the beginning of the week, we try to do a deeper dive, setting a kind of stoic intention for the week, something to meditate on, something to think on, something to leave you with, to journal about whatever it is you happen to be doing. So let's get into it.

You should major in your majors. Just like ours, the ancient world was filled with people who had ambitious goals and trouble prioritizing them. Seneca said it was one of the hardest balances to strike in life. We don't want to be the person who can never sit still. For love of bustle is not industry," Seneca said. It is only the restlessness of a hunted mind. But we also don't want to be the person who's always sitting still. True repose does not consist in condemning all emotion as merely vexation, he wrote.

That kind of repose is slackness and inertia. The work of the philosopher, Seneca said, is finding the perfect balance between those two tendencies. It's about working and relaxing, not working and work avoidance. When we had the great Matthew McConaughey on the Daily Stoke podcast, he told us the story of how he found that balance for himself. At one point a few years ago, McConaughey realized he was doing too much. I had like eight proverbial campfires on my desk, he said. He had a production company, a music label, a foundation, his acting career, and his family. So what I did is I got rid of about five of the campfires.

He called his lawyer and he shut down the production company and the music label. And I was left with the three things that were most important to me. And those three campfires turned into bonfires. So I majored in my majors and I got rid of five minors that I was majoring in trying to major in and I was kind of making C pluses in everything and when I got rid of five classes and concentrated on the three that I really wanted I started making eight. Life is about trade-offs. It would be wonderful if we could do it all, but we can't, not well at least.

As McConaughey and many others have learned the hard way, the more things you try to do, the less adequately you do all of them. And the more vulnerable you make yourself to the consequences of mediocrity, inadequacy, and failure. But as Marcus Aurelius put it, when you pare down to the essentials, you eliminate the inessentials,

you get the double benefit of doing the essential stuff better. And you become more resilient and stronger as a result. And we've actually had Matthew McHoney on the podcast twice. We had him once for an hour remotely during the pandemic, and then we did it remotely again for two hours. I was in the studio. He wasn't.

Both are great YouTube videos, which I'll link to in today's show notes. And then listen to the episode on the podcast, however you listen to your podcast as well. I think it's one of the best episodes. I think he's one of the best guests we've ever had. I think he's a fascinating dude, someone I'm glad to have gotten to know.

I think you'll like it. What can go wrong might, and this is from this week's entry in the Daily Stoic Journal, 366 Days of Writing and Reflection on the Art of Living by yours truly. We call people who dwell on what might go wrong pessimists. Some even think that bad thoughts attract bad events. The Stoics found this all to be nonsense. In fact, they had a practice, pre-meditatio malorum,

pre-meditation of evils, that specifically encouraged musing on the so-called worst case scenario. Marcus would begin his day thinking about all the ugliness he would see on display in court, not for the purpose of working himself up, but precisely the opposite, to calm and focus himself, to be prepared to act in the proper way rather than just to react.

Seneca too practiced meditating in advance, not only on what normally happens, but on what could happen. Epictetus went as far as to imagine losing a loved one every time he would kiss them. The Stokes believed that all we have is on loan from fortune and that negative visualization helps increase our awareness of the unexpected. So don't shy away from this and your thoughts.

And we have two quotes today from Marcus Aurelius and from Seneca. When you arise in the morning, tell yourself I will encounter busybodies, ingrates, egomaniacs, liars, the jealous, and cranks. They are all stricken with these afflictions because they don't know the difference between good and evil. Because I have understood the beauty of good and the ugliness of evil, I know that the wrongdoers are still akin to me and that none can do me harm or implicate me in ugliness, nor can I be angry at my relatives and hate them, for we are made for cooperation." Before I get to the Seneca quote, I would say that the many first times I read this quote,

especially when I read it young, I focused on that first part where you list just how awful and frustrating everyone will be. And I think that's sort of the rudimentary understanding. It's like, look, you know, don't go into the world all rosy-eyed and bushy-tailed or you're gonna get your heart stomped on, right? You got to be aware. You got to be prepared. You can't be naive. Marcus really says, don't go expecting Plato's Republic. But it's really the second part of that that's hit me more, right? Why is he doing that exercise?

It's so when he's hit by it, when he's hit by a cheat or a liar or a person who is, you know, messing around on their spouse or, you know, when he sees somebody do something wrong, he's not surprised by it. It doesn't make him bitter and it doesn't make him write off all of humanity as a whole. He says, because I know better, I know that the wrongdoers are still akin to me. And he says, and none can do me harder, implicate me in ugliness, nor can I be angry at my relatives or hate them.

That's something I've been working on. It's like I was just dealing with this someone who I really care about and they're just, you know, being, you know, not safe or smart or who I know them to be. And I wanted to unload on them and I had to go, no, I care about this person. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not going to let, I should have prepared for this. I shouldn't have built

them up in my head. They're human being. They have flaws. They do the wrong thing. Sometimes I'm not going to I'm not going to cast them out of my heart or out of my life for what they've done. And then this goes into the second Seneca quote, being unexpected adds to the weight of a disaster. And being a surprise has never failed to increase a person's pain. For that reason, nothing should ever be unexpected by us. Our minds should be sent out in advance to all the things,

and we shouldn't just consider the normal course of things, but what could actually happen? For is there anything in life that fortune won't knock off its high horse if it pleases her? You know, I have the pre-Mentachio-Milorum coin here on my desk, and I just look at it, I go, look, look, Murphy's law is real, man, things can go sideways fast. I

mean, imagine where you were the first week of March 2020. Did you see the next 12 months coming? Very, very few people did. But we would have been better had we been more prepared, had we been more realistic, had we been less in our own fantasy world. You know, Seneca says, the only unforgivable thing for a general to say is I did not think it would happen. So of course, positive visualization is thinking of all the good things that can happen. You can

succeed, you can break through, you can make it. If it's humanly possible, no, you can do it, Marcus says. At the same time, the law of attraction is not real. If you would think about negative things, you don't attract negative things. You actually make yourself more prepared to wrestle with and deal with and conquer those difficult things. And that is why we do our premeditation,

that is why we think of all the things that can happen. That's why we meditate on the people we're likely to meet so that they can't drag us down. They can't implicate us in ugliness and they can't make us unhappy. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to the Daily Stoic early and ad free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today, or you can listen early and ad free with Wondery Plus in Apple podcasts. Your girl Kiki Palmer is out here doing all the things, winning an Emmy, acting, singing,

looking fabulous. And my favorite role yet, podcasso's. In my podcast, baby, this is Kiki Palmer. I'm talking to so many cool people. Some of my favorite conversations have been about growing up as a child star with Allian AJ, queer rights and trans issues with JVN, abusive relationships with Dr. Drew,

silk presses with the VP, and the music that shapes us with Mean Girls' Renee Rapp. So many to choose from. And in this new season, just wait who I'll be talking to next. Snoop Dogg, Sterling K. Brown, Saweetie to name a few. Follow Baby This Is Kiki Palmer on the Wondery app

or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch full episodes on YouTube and you can listen to Baby This Is Kiki Palmer early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus.