Determined Society with Shawn French | Adversity & Mindset - Academy of Maximized Potential with Nick Connor

Episode Date: August 7, 2023

As a Citizen of the World, Nick Connor has learned that no matter where you go, your presence, energy, and the way you make people feel, is the only language you need to speak. As a speaker, coach, & the founder of The Academy Of Maximum Potential (AMP) his in-your-face but on-your-side message cuts through the noise and gets straight to the point. Nick is obsessed with maximizing human potential and is here today to equip you with what you need to finally commit to unlocking the best version of yourself, so you can positively impact and influence others. Key Conversation Points: 1. Wake Up Earlier Than Your Responsibilities - Creating time and space to think, feel, and exercise! You'll elevate emotionally, rise above the distractions, temptations, and repeat behaviors that are crushing your finances, relationships, and fitness. 2. Focus On Removing (-) Behaviors vs. Adding (+) Behaviors - You're your biggest problem! Want to change that? Remove inconsistent results and uncertainty by removing repeat behaviors that bring you pain (alcohol, porn, drugs, snoozing, over eating, over spending, etc). Remove 2-3 of these and in 12 months you won't recognize your life. 3. Actively Recognize Mistakes & Shortcomings Daily Successful people focus on their shortcomings and failures WHILE remaining grateful for their life. Unsuccessful people hide their shortcomings and failures and project an image of success WHILE secretly having their existence. Stop it! 4. Remind Yourself Daily Who You Are, Where You're Going, & Why You're mind is like a heat seeking missile - it needs feedback to reach the target. If you do not intentionally provide directions, your mind will default to what it's always known - which has landed you exactly where you are today. If that isn't motivation enough to get you to follow step #4...sorry, I can't help you. 5. Pour into others daily - NEWSFLASH - it's not all about you! Nothing will accelerate your growth than taking what you know and teaching it to others. Don't let your lack of experience, depth of knowledge, or EGO get in the way. Just share what works for you. Connect with Nick: Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/nickconnor/ Connect with Shawn: Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/theshawnfrench/ Website- https://theshawnfrench.com/ Email- [e-mail]   Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I'm going through that moment now. I am working my ass off now. I am hitting all the nutrition. I am lifting six days a week. I am walking 45 minutes, seven days a week. Like, I'm on this mission now, right? I have to live it because I saw my boy live it. I saw you come out on the other side.

I was like, wait a second. I was sick and tired of looking at myself in the mirror and not being proud of the man that I saw. I was sick and tired of people telling me how much potential I had, but I didn't feel those things. Why? Because I was getting my ass handed to me in the competition with my own mind. My mind was calling me to do better, be better, and I wasn't stepping up. What's up, guys? We are back. This is the Determined Society. I'm your host, Sean French, and I have another badass guest today that, man, I can tell you what. He's one of the most well-spoken, discipline men that I have ever had the pleasure of meeting and being able to call a friend.

He is a speaker, a coach. He is the founder of the Academy of Maximized Potential. is in your face, but on your side message cuts deep to the core of all of our hearts and gets us to move in a direction that we know we can become our best selves. So without further ado, I want to introduce my friend, my boy, Nick Connor. Frenchie is a great nickname. We always add wise to names. My nickname in, in Ball was Nicky C. So that's the way it goes.

I was going to say, what do they call you, N-Con or NC? Like, what was it? Yeah, Nikki C. Nikki C. Nicky C. That's a good one. But hey, man, we should be moved away from those old baseball sports nicknames and Daddy and Papa and all those things sound pretty good too, right? Bro, absolutely. You know, it's one of those things that you hear over and over and over again.

And, you know, you got to be careful to not, you know, assume that as your complete identity. It's something that we are. But, like, man, no, getting away from those old nicknames, it makes sense because, I mean, how many versions ago was that? Like how many Sean Frenches ago was the baseball player at LSU? I mean, and I would like to ask you the same question. How many versions ago is that Nikki C? Oh, man. I mean, that seems like decades ago.

I mean, it's creeping up on, you know, two decades, not quite two decades, but it's been a long time. But I have great memories from sports. And I don't have the kind of the sad story that a lot of guys will share about their sports experience. I mean, I feel like I milked every single bit of talent that I had out and got a great opportunity to play at the D1 level and play some minor league baseball and all that good stuff. But, but dude, if I'm not evolving every year in my life now, I feel like I'm doing something wrong. Like, if I'm dealing with the same problems that I had last year, I feel like I'm not growing.

So, like, I'd say in the last five years, it's been quantum, quantum leaps away from who I was back then but bro i will say since i've known you over the last two years you've had a huge quantum leap right and we were talking about this before we hopped on the show i made a joke or you know a compliment about the the most handsome most well-spoken man i know man i got to tell you everything about you from the time i met you you were the dude back then but you have dialed in so narrowly on everything that you need to do on a day-to-day basis that you're you have turned into this fucking just this animal bro and like every time i see something that you're doing every time that i'm hearing a speech pattern of yours i'm like the fuck he's talking to me again like

what the fuck man this guy's cutting so deep and he's in my face but it's done with such love and care and like dude you're absolutely doing some amazing things right now and you have it all dialed in and i just want i want you to explain to the audience that shift because there was a right you've always coached men but there was this moment like that i can see from afar i mean you're in estonia i'm here in florida and i'm like oh fuck nick just has been in the lab and he's like he's straight up m and m right now like that's what it feels like well man i mean it's a thank you i receive it and the message cuts deepest when you talk about things that there's like deep and knowing, like, well, I know what I'm saying because I'm living it and I'm being it.

And that is why my content shifted. And not even necessarily massive growth or huge opportunities that came from people seeing the message. But the depth of the response is so, like, it's such a reminder to me that every day that, man, people need the truth. People right now more than ever are seeking truth. And when I just started talking to my previous self six months ago, 12 months ago, it through the content, speaking honestly about what I needed to hear six months ago, 12 months ago, shoot, maybe even that morning, that's when my content really started to resonate with a lot of people. So, you know, when I hear you say that, I have. heard it from several people. And of course, I'm speaking from a perspective of a man. And so men are

mainly the ones that are reaching out. And also, I realize like, there's a lot of men that aren't as willing as you are to do what you just did. It's difficult for most men to acknowledge another man. And I would say one of the biggest shifts in my life that helped me start to really grow and address my character was when not only was I willing to acknowledge that I didn't have all the answers and I needed help. But when I was willing to go to another man and say, I respect you. I see how you're living. I want to live how you're living. Can you teach me? Can you show me how? That takes, that takes, uh, when it comes to what your family eats and drinks, you know your choices matter. You're the expert because you know what fits your life. And getting it right starts with good

information. That's why America's beverage companies are sharing more information about our ingredients at good to know facts.org. No spin, no judgments, just the facts straight from the experts for more than 140 beverage ingredients. Visit good to know facts.org. That takes a lot for a man to be willing to do that. So for those that are listening, what Sean just did is evidence of his growth and his maturation, his determination, what he's had to overcome, because humility comes with that, man. And so when I think about a turning point, there's been so many. But the one that comes to mind right now is when I was willing to acknowledge another man for his strengths, ask him for advice or support, or even just say, hey, bro, I see what you're doing.

Like, keep doing you. That's when a lot of things started to change in my life, man. No, dude, that's powerful. And you're right. For a lot of years, you know, the immature, Sean would just, would be silently clapping. It's, it's, it's more for me to truly understand and respect what a man like you was doing and then tell you. I mean, like straight up, man, like what I've seen from you over the last year has been outside looking in, astronomical growth as a human being. And it has helped so many men, you know, hearing that message.

But also too, dude, like, it's helped me. Like, I don't know. And I'm going to tell you, man, there was a point, man, I'd say about shit, four months ago, maybe five months ago. And I realized that, you know, kind of like what you said in your Academy of Maximized Potential Video is like you're, you've been so busy taking care of other people, getting your life to that point when you're on that fucking vacation, you have the wife that you have, you have the beautiful children, but you're scared to take your fucking shirt off at the poll that day. you gain 25 pounds and now you're dealing with a problem that you never thought you would have. Yeah. So I've been dealing with that. Hmm.

I'm, I'm struggling through it now. And I think one of the biggest, I think the biggest things I could ever do for myself and my audience is always be real and be straightforward with where I'm at personally. Because I think that brings people closer to you because they're not, they know you're not some bullshit hack. Yeah. With a house of cards, right?

That's about the fault. I'm going through that moment now. I am working my ass off now. I am hitting all the nutrition. I am lifting six days a week. I am walking 45 minutes, seven days a week. Like, I'm on this mission now, right? I have to live it because I saw my boy live it.

I saw you come out on the other side. I was like, wait a second. Why am I not acting like this? Why am I not living life like this? Because I'm incongruent right now with who I truly am inside. but the version of Sean that people are seeing is not the dude and if and if the people on the outside aren't seeing the real Sean I'm like man how's that affecting my wife and my children that's when it fucking smoked me right in the face it's like okay enough yeah but there were

setbacks and there were like it's not that bad it's not that bad you know it's just one meal I went to the gym three days this week it was better than zero now fuck that those are cop outs and so you know here's what I'm telling you and I'm telling the world now that I'm fucking coming for it all yeah man and and and and and that is no threat to my perspective and my approach and my commitment to do the same thing and and again competition is necessary and it's happening whether you like it or not and that's no surprise for for us, we come from that world. And there's a lot of narrative around who's competing, should we compete?

I don't think it's a question of if we, if or should we, it's happening. We're competing in the world. And the competition that most men are losing in their lives is the one that they're having with their self. They're competing with the thing that's actually going to help them win. which is that voice inside their head that's calling them to go to the gym instead of sleep in. Their consciousness is calling them to show up home after a hard day work of work, free mentally to be there emotionally and present with your kids and your wife.

We know what to do. Our voice, that thing inside of our head for most men is calling them to improve, to be better. But most men are getting their asses handed to them in that competition. And so what I had to do, Sean, I had to start looking at it as a game. We're one of two things as human beings, and I believe this, we're either toward motivated or we're away motivated. We're motivated for the potential that we could have a certain type of a relationship or have a certain type of home. or we're motivated to write a book or get booked for a certain stage. That would be toward motivated.

But some of us are a way motivated. I was sick and tired of looking at myself in the mirror and not being proud of the man that I saw. I was sick and tired of people telling me how much potential I had, how much talent or how good looking or handsome I was, how articulate and charismatic I am. But I didn't feel those things. Why? Because I was getting my ass handed to me in the competition with my own mind.

My mind was calling me to do better, be better, and I wasn't stepping up and winning that, that competition. If you don't like the world competition, think it of as a test. A test. We're getting tested every day. And our bodies, society, pretty much everything happening in the world, the test is to make us show up less than we're capable of being. We're tempted to consume.

We're tempted to waste time. We're tempted to be distracted. We're even tempted by our wives who love us more than any. in the world, hopefully, if you're lucky and fortunate, like I think you and I are. But they still test us. How are you passing the test? And here's what I found after the commitment that I made. It was about two years ago when I made the decision that I was going to stop losing that battle. I was going to start winning the battle in my mind and show up every day and be the best version of myself. And as I started to win that victory, I found that I wasn't losing as many battles

with my wife when she tested me. I learned that I wasn't as impatient with my two and a half year old daughter who's downstairs screaming half the time when I'm on a coaching call and somebody's paying me a lot of money. Like I started winning those tests. And that's when I realized this idea that you referenced there about putting yourself first, selfish selflessness. There's a lot of fancy names for it.

But what is it really? Dude, it's doing you so that. you can fulfill yourself and overflow positivity, love, all the things you value into the people that you're responsible for. That's what it's about, man. Dude, I think, and I know, and I want to point to this, because you're talking about the battle of your mind. You know, we see it all over social media. You know, the big guys in the space like Annie Versaella talk about is you versus you every single day. The only competition is you versus you. Look in the mirror. That's your person. Yeah. That's who you have to become better

than every single day. And I think the problem is, you know, we get so bogged down in consuming and scrolling and, you know, trying to beat the next guy because we feel if we can be better than that other person, then we're going to have all the success. Man, their success means fucking nothing in this, in the realm of what you can create for yourself. The reality is if you can win that battle with your mind every single day. And I listened to a podcast this afternoon when I was walking. My buddy Eric Rock has this awesome podcast, man on the mission. He had Cole Hatter on. Oh, yeah. Cole. Cole Hatter was talking about, what's that? Cole's great. Cole's great. And, you know, he, you know, he met Goggins in 2019. And Goggins told him,

man, if you want, it sounds like what you need is he become, you know, you got to win that battle. You got, he goes, you hate running. Well, that's, you have to run. Because if you can create this mental discipline and toughness to you, then you're going to win so many more battles in your business and your relationships. And you just alluded to that fact. And it's very important to understand that, you know, in those moments, we don't want to get up and go to the gym. Those are the moments you have to go because that is your, that is your conscious and your subconscious fighting each other like crazy. And if you give in to that, you know what, I'm just going to sit here. I worked out yesterday. It's fine. Then the next time you have to make a tough.

decision you're gonna fucking lose very few don't very few don't lose that second decision and I learn that about myself I learn that when I when I don't make a decision that I feel like that I should I generally will make the next decision the same way and I learn that about myself and that that that is my addiction you know I I know addiction I don't throw that word out lightly. My father was an alcohol and drug addict, ultimately lost his life as a result of those things. I know addiction intimately.

So I don't throw that word around lightly. But that was my addiction. And still in many ways, like most addicts, it will always be my Achilles heel. It's that I'm not the dude that can just have one. I'm not that dude. Doesn't work with lace potato chips. Doesn't work with alcohol.

Didn't work with women. It didn't work with, it doesn't work with, the decision to step one, put one foot, which is what I had to do when I decided I'd wake up at at 358 a.m. I just had to pass the test of, I'm just going to take one foot out of bed and put it on the ground. I had to minimize it to that so that I would pass that test. And the mornings that I didn't take that foot out and put it on the ground when the alarm went off, guess what I did? I slept in. Go back to sleep. And then I would generally not go to the gym that morning. And then I would not do

my routine. I would not connect to my source. I would not do the things that I know work for me. And then well, Andy Frizzella, you mentioned Andy and I know you're a first form guy now. Yeah. One of the things that Andy got into a conversation with, with Wes Watson back in the day, who I respect both of them, because they motivate by away motivation. I can't, I hope everybody heard what I was saying there. I don't really finish the thought. You got to understand how you're motivated. When I listen to an Andy Frizella or a Wes Watson, it's very different than when I listen to when I listen to a Les Brown or a Brunet Brown or a Lewis Howes. They're very toward motivating.

I would even say Tony Robbins is heavily toward motivating. They push you to think about what could be. Andy Cazella, why I love him is because he talks about what you're not going to have, what you're going to continue to experience if you stay the same. So that's why those podcasts are worth listening for me. Who is worth listening for you? for those of you listening.

You've got to figure that out. So where I was going with Andy is that when we don't pass these tests, when we lose that competition, when we don't pass the test, the battle of our mind, we get into what they call or introduce to me, carmic debt. I had never heard of carmic debt before.

I don't know if you are familiar with it. What did you say it was? It's carmic debt. And this is, if you've never heard of it, bro, this is going to blow your mind. You're going to go down a rabbit hole,

but everybody should write this down. It blew my mind. Carmic debt is when you make a decision you don't pass the test and you know in your mind dang I should have went to the gym dang I told myself I was going to wake up when the alarm went off I hit the snooze

you're doing that in the future what happened was in the past and when you're thinking about it is in the future so that time that passes from the moment that you made the decision to all that time that you're spending thinking about it, that time that's past is called Carmic Debt. And every minute, every hour that you're thinking about a past decision,

you're not making a decision for your future. That's how I understand Carmic Debt. If you're spending an hour today, thinking about what you did yesterday, you are operating in Carmic Debt. And so Carmic Debt is about energy. It's about how much energy in time are you putting into past debt? decisions. And when you start to, let's say that you, okay, Karmic dad, okay, cool, Nick,

when you start to prove to yourself that you can do the hard thing, whether it's four sets of burpees, 25 burpees instead of two, or waking up at five instead of six, or, you know, putting your cell phone down for the three hours that you're with your family at night, when you decide to do that thing that's difficult for you to do for a week for two weeks for three weeks you'll understand what karmic debt is because your mind your conscious will be free from thinking so much in the past and you'll realize fuck how much energy have i been putting into thinking about my past decisions and when you realize that you start to appreciate time you start to have real gratitude for the moment, which allows you to be present.

And so this is about character development. I think that what you've seen in me, because I know it's something that you value, because it's something that you have, which is high character. So I think that maybe what you've seen from me, Sean, is that my character is more congruent with my message. And ultimately, as influencers, as thought leaders,

authors, speakers, what we do is a commodity at this point. But who we are is really how we level up. Who we are being is really what is going to separate us from everybody else saying pretty much the same things, doing pretty much the same things. And so that's what I try to work with my clients on, man. And I'm doing that because that's what works for me. Okay. I'm trying to sell what works for me now. and nothing else. Yeah. The thing that I love most about everything that you're doing, and the true reason why it resonated with me is because I knew you were speaking to your former self.

That's dope that you get that. Most people don't get that. People don't, yeah, you see, see, that's a difference. And that's why when I, when I choose to respond on one of your, one of your, you know, videos, it's because I, like, it's, it's resonating deeply because I know where you were going, with it. I understand that that's why there's so much passion about, you know, the relationships, your body, your relationship with your children, you're speaking to your former self. That's the content. That's the message that hits home for the people that want to be better. You know,

a lot of people would, would, you know, like you said, you have this in your face type, but by your side approach. Man, I, I just don't see it as in your face, right? because I'm listening to it, I'm like, oh, shit. Like, this is enlightenment here. This is great. He's able to speak this freely because he's working through his own shit. He's on the other side. And now he's helping other men do it.

So, you know, major applause, dude, because it's, uh, it's just, it's a, it's a, it's a breath of fresh air, dude. There's not enough people out there putting real shit out. And there's a lot of fake influencers. There's a lot of people. that are talking about shit, that they're not doing. And we can't control that, right? We can't control that aspect of it.

But what we can control and damn sure should control is how we're operating in our daily lives, how we're putting in the work and how we're showing up for others. Yeah, man. Yeah. It's, you know, I've, I've been a version of pretty much everything that people get accused of being in this space. and the reason I have a heart for people slide into my DMs with a terrible approach, individuals who have never coached anybody selling that they're going to teach somebody how to build a coaching business.

Like, dude, I've done all those things. I've been hypocritical because I've talked about things that were hypothetical in my life. meaning a majority of the time I wasn't living, or at the very least committed to living what I was talking about. And that was my character growth that I needed. I was willing to put in the work to create the video, the piece of content. I was willing to show up and put myself out there.

These are all things that were encouraged to do as we pursue personal development. So on one hand, I was personally developing. I was showing up. I was, you know, faking it until you make it, which some people agree with. Regardless of you agree or disagree, I was speaking life into a future that I saw for myself as a speaker and a coach. And even though I felt unqualified, I tried to show up as if I was. So that could be positive.

Oh, good job, Nick. But on the same token, when I wasn't getting sales and I wasn't making sales calls consistently, I wouldn't do what I was talking about. I wouldn't remind myself of the wins I've had in the past. I wouldn't sit down and put myself in the chair and just dial anyway. So there were hypocrisies in the way that I was living. But that's a part of the journey for everybody. The problem is that when your character doesn't allow you to acknowledge your hypocrisy,

that's when it becomes a problem. That's when ego and arrogance, maybe even entitlement becomes a problem. one of the big things I think that is an issue in the in the space that we're in is that you can start wherever you're at charge whatever you want to charge offer whatever you want to offer but where it becomes a problem is when you think that you've earned the right to to be on Andy Frizzellas podcast before you've ever earned the right to be on Andy Frizzell's podcast like the law of compensation is real and I have to remind myself all the time of this Sean because like look dude I've I've done pretty well I've you know I've been coaching out for 10 years

I make a living and provide for my family. I've checked some boxes in terms of speaking engagements, wrote a book, all these things. Cool. But I still feel like I am a nobody in this industry in terms of authority, credibility, all that stuff. So I have to remind myself, like, Nick, you've been in this for 10 years, but there's things that you haven't done yet. And these things are things that will give you the opportunity to get into that space,

will give you the credibility to get offered to be in that space because it's real easy to be like, damn, why isn't Andy calling? Damn, why isn't Lewis Howes calling at the School of Greatness? Why aren't these things happening? Law of compensation. Your character hasn't developed enough, Nick. Where can you grow? Who can you become?

There's a reason why people, men, lose their relationships. And it's not always because of the girl. there's a reason why somebody's going on job after view after job interview job interview after job interview and they're not getting the job and it's not always the fault of the boss. So for, you know, we entered into this and the reason I brought it up because we were talking about seeing other coaches

do things and in the hypocrisy that we see in it. And it's like, yes, there is hypocrisy in it. And we all kind of operate that way at times in our lives. But the real hypocrisy is not being willing to admit it, not being willing to acknowledge in yourself that you have some character areas that need to grow, no matter what you're doing in your life. Now, for us, it's extra important.

Like, I used to sell helping coaches, you know, get to their first 10K in a month, and that was cool in everything. But I stopped doing that. Not because it didn't work or anything like that. I stopped doing it because I believed in something different, and it was around character development. But if I went back in coached coaches,

like if I was working with you and we weren't just friends well shoot even though we are friends I'm so excited for what you're doing with the fitness commitment and the nutrition commitment and discipline because I know that that's a character thing you are going to be more congruent your podcast is going to go get even bigger your content's going to get even better because your conscious was calling you to get into better shape and you answered the call so you do that you wake up early, I wake up early, I prioritize fitness. We have families. If you don't have a family, if you don't want to get fit, if you don't have a podcast, fine. What is the thing in your conscious that's calling you? What is calling you in your life to be better? Don't compare yourself to what

Sean and I are doing if you don't have a desire to get fit or wake up at 358 a.m. But if you do, don't hate on what you gave up on. If you get called out, because you see somebody like me posting 358 a.m. every day, be humble enough to say, I'm getting called out. And this triggers me because I know I want to do that. When you hear Sean talking about being a better husband, being a better father, when you see, see him calling out these youth coaches who are like so far out of their mind for the expectations they're placing on their kids. And you feel called out by that. Maybe you're kind of that dude. Yeah. Man, like what we get to do, Sean, is ultimately we get to help people acknowledge the flaws in their character and and the growth in their character. And we're better at that when we are doing that to ourselves. So like, damn, bro, like we get paid for this. It's wild. I tell you what, man. It's, it's funny because I'm sitting here listening and we're talking about character, right? And how you are if you're if you're in if you're incongruent with who you really are,

Or if you're incongruency. Like, dude, it's straight up. I felt so incongruent over the last shit, man. Probably six, seven months. Because I just completely let the physical part of me go. And it's a small thing for me. Here's what happened with me. I had this weird, you know, little fucking thing on my back.

And it was like a pre-cancer thing. We go in, we get it removed. My wife goes to Ecuador. Then the very next day, I barely have anybody to change my dressings, right? So I have to like go to the actual dermatologist, change my dressings, drive an hour so my mom can change my dressing so that way it doesn't get infected. And, but when I lifted, it hurt because it was in the very middle of my back. And anytime I would, you know, you just feel it, just pull. That took me so off track. That was last, fuck man, man, it's been almost a year.

That was last August. Yeah. And I was finally getting to that. point where I was, you know, 202 pounds. I was starting to tighten up and I was like, that one thing threw me completely off track. And I firmly believe the struggles that I'm facing now, whether it's with my, with my show growth, maybe revenue within the business, all goes back to that one fucking moment. I let up. I stopped.

So now I can sit here and I can, just like you said, I can either hate on what I gave up on, or I can just say, hold on a second, dude. Like, you want to get back in that energy, you want to get back to that, then fucking go. And I, like you said, you alluded to, I partnered up with first form. They saw something in me. That was the catalyst for me to say, wait a second, the biggest supplement brand on the fucking planet. One that the CEO is Andy Vrcella, who I've been inspired by since his first podcast, MFCEO project, I'm like, oh, dude, don't fuck this up.

Don't fuck this up because you were going to expose yourself in the nastiest way if you do. So let's dial back into it. Let's infuse myself back in that culture. Let me live that lifestyle and let's see what the fuck I can create. Because for me, if I can be congruent in that part of my life, my speech pattern gets better, I'm still not to the point where I, I feel like my speech pattern is where it needs to be. Like there's moments that it comes back, but then there's moments where I'm in low energies.

Like straight up, dude this morning, lowest energy I've been in in two weeks. Man, it was low energy. I was just frustrated, angry. What I do? Well, I went out for an hour walk. You know, I had to sweat a little bit. I got in the sun. I knew I had to be on this call with my boy today and have a great conversation.

that might inspire some people. I owed it to not just myself, but to you and to the community listening to get off my ass and fucking walk. And oh, by the way, it was an act of rest. So that's what I needed to do anyway. But I want to be in a better energy. I don't want to be on this call with you, you know, talking about all this stuff and then knowing that I let myself sit in my own pull of piss.

It's not how it works. Dude, it's so powerful. And because what you're talking about, is, and what you're revealing, very, like, dude, it's visceral, bro. Like,

I could feel the depth of the conscious incongruence that you are in, we're in. And you were using powerful words. Someone say words that are, like, you're like mentally hard on yourself. Like,

a personal development person who doesn't hold space very, well, would want to come in and interrupt that and be like, hold on a minute, like, listen to what you just said about yourself. But no, man, you've gone into the darkness and you've gone into the darkness with the truth. And number one, that's not easy to do. Most people aren't willing to do that. And you've expressed very clearly the way that you feel when you're not doing what you know you need to do. And the response has to be inspiring for people because of that, if you're not inspired by somebody who says from a place that they were in

where they were new, the depths of their decisions were taking them mentally, emotionally, spiritually, maybe even financially, they recognize that they are the biggest problem in their life. And then they actually do something about it. If that doesn't inspire you to address what's going on in your lap, I don't know what will. But here's the reason why most don't, because they're not willing to go into the dark. They're not willing to look at the truth. And maybe they can't see it, but most people actually can. Sean, I've been on thousands of hours of coaching calls.

I've been a one-on-one coach for over a decade now. I've talked to men, women, CEOs, first-time salespeople, and everything in between. Most people know what they need to do and are aware of the fact that they're not doing it. and for a long time I would entertain a whole bunch of other stuff to get them out of that place, teaching them tactics, teaching them time management, teach them how to overcome objections. I know you're a sales guy. God, that's really never the case.

You're not just a sales guy. But none of that matters. If they're not able to get over the fact that they're not doing. what they know they need to do. And that's why, dude, I've just stripped everything away, even in my own life. It's like, okay, yes, I need to be improving with skills and tactical, that kind of stuff. But at the end of the day, I can't go a day without answering the call because this is the margin that we live in. Give me one second.

That lighting was causing like a crazy glare on my face. Yeah, I noticed it. Isn't it like, what day is it in Estonia? Dude, dude, the stuff is really go down in Estonia for everybody. The sun is up pretty much 24-7 here. and funny, funny quick story about that. You know, I wake up at 358 a.m. And I document this daily for accountability for myself is how it started.

But now I've realized like, oh, people are actually following and inspired. And some people are getting up earlier. So it's cool. And for a long time, I would record making a coffee. And it was light outside. So I started getting messages like, bro, you're not waking up early anymore. Like you're faking the funk. And I'm like, no, you don't understand.

It's light every morning. It gets bright light outside at like 2.45 a.m. here. It's basically daylight outside. So for all you hate it is out there, you know, go fuck yourself. Yeah, go fuck off. Test my integrity, you dicks. Yeah, yeah. But dude, what you're talking about is the margin.

And people call it momentum. But it's like a delta in our lives. We have this delta. And the delta for you toward motivated people, the truth about the delta is that right now you're in the negative and I've been there. I know what it's like to have a negative balance in my bank account. Or maybe your relationship makes you feel bankrupt. Or maybe you're putting in a bunch of effort and it doesn't seem like it's paying off right now.

But the truth is that you're really not that far away from breaking through. You're one more day, Ed Milet would say, one more day, one more day, one more. Your one more moment. My thing is you're one test away from breaking through and getting to the other side. But if we want to accept that, like I'm a Christian, I think you're a Christian. We both love God, certainly. If you believe in Jesus, you also got to believe in the adversary. And so the opposite is true here.

If you're that close to breaking through and getting to the other side, that means that you're also that close to losing all that momentum, all that progress, all that hard work, that moment. momentum, that energetic state, flow state is fickle. And so when we make a decision to not do what it is that we know we need to do, we have taken that step back. And that step back is felt. It's real. We just talked about Carmic debt. That's how you feel not taking that step. You know, for me, it's if I don't take the step, I'm generally not taking the next two or three steps. that's how it's felt. So if we want to believe in all these aspirational and platitudes of personal development, and we want to be inspired by all of that, we also need to embrace that there's a negative side. There's a light and dark to everything. I've experienced it in my life. I know the

depths of my evil inside of me. I've said things in my marriage, Sean, that I never thought what I would hear come out of my mouth. Yeah, man. Yeah. I've, I've, I've done things, bro, in my life. I've been in places mentally. I never thought I would get. I've done things. I know I'm a dangerous person. I know that I know that. I can be a danger to myself and I can be a danger to others. But I also know how giving and loving and kind and compassionate, how spirit-filled I am. And so it's the polarity. And the thing that people miss, especially Christians,

for you Christians listening, especially you Christian men, do your men's group, bro. Go do your devotional. But you got to get up off your knees when you're done praying, man. You got to leave the room, the comfort of that room with your brothers and go out into the world. And it's like, what are you doing? How powerful are you showing up in those times, in those spaces?

And it's like, who are you actually being when it gets tough? Because that's where we feel the power. Like bro, when I started working up earlier in the morning, I was having spiritual experiences. I was so available energetically to receive. I was so grateful for the moment of peace and quiet. And actually proving to myself that I could put that foot out on the floor when I said I would. dude I'd be in tears going to going to the gym no music I always cry when I listen to Christian music there's something that Christian yeah that that's how I became a follower man

because same elevation worship music man is the best in the world it was in my backyard for so long but I cry all the time when I listen to Christian music but no music bro just in tune and so if you believe in the conscience and you believe in that voice that we're referencing and you're a Christian and then we call that generally the Holy Spirit, you become available to the promptings, to the message, to the voice that's calling you to be better and do better. And it is that simple.

You either listen or you don't. Binary, you pass the test or you don't. You get to feel high levels of energy or you don't. You know, it all goes back to that one point where you said, you know, I'm here. the powerful language, most people would stop you. You've gone to the darkness. Brother, I don't think you could ever come out on the other end if you don't choose to

fucking dive into that darkness, dude. Like, I don't, I don't think I've ever created anything worth shit in this life. If I didn't just take a minute to feel where the fuck I'm at, as dark as it may be. So true. And close my eyes and not run from that moment. Come on. But just to lean into that suffering. If you cannot lean into the suffering, there is no light, there is no reward, there is no success.

You have to be able to feel that pain of the suffering that you're going through, whether it's financial, physical, relationship, emotional, spiritually. It doesn't matter. You have to feel it because if you don't feel it, you can't appreciate the good moments. And that's for me, that's where I'm at. A lot of people would say, Sean, you're being way too hard on yourself, you're loving, you're a great father, you're this, you're that fucking stop. I'm not the fucking man.

God created me to be. Let's go. So if you can sit there and you can be happy for the mediocrity that you might be right now, then by all means, because when you go to those pearly gates and God introduces you to the person that you don't recognize that was supposed to be you, that's my biggest fear. That's my biggest fear. So I'm running away from that. Like, I don't want that. I am a big away from motivator. Right. Like I know where I'm at right now and I want to run away from it.

You know, and maybe I might be best served running towards something, visualizing something that more beautiful. Like what am I going to look like in 12 months? It doesn't work for me. Well, I want to resonate with the current pain I'm in right now. The people that are feeling it. Absolutely. And I love what you're saying because it's an important,

it's an important thing to discuss, especially for men. the worst thing that the best thing and the worst thing, or not worse, but the hardest thing, the best thing for me was that I was raised by my mother. She was incredible, raised us on her own and was the most nurturing, kind, caring, compassionate soul that I know.

But it was also the hard, created the hardest thing for me to overcome, which is that I was too driven by my feelings. I was too, I was too concerned with how I felt. I would do things based on how I felt. And a lot of that was nurture, but it went against nature.

And make no mistake about it, our nature as men has been created based on evolution. And we have survived because we've been willing to go into the darkness. We've been willing to go on the hunt. We've been willing to go to battle. We've been willing to, you know, jump in front of the bullet. Time and time again, you hear stories of men that were willing to do things that were very

dark. And frankly, this is how we as a society have evolved. We men are necessary pillars in society in order for it to thrive. And the problem is that people think that the woke agenda and the attack on masculinity is new. bro, this been going on since Exodus, bro. You need to dig into the word. And even if you don't like Jesus or the Bible or religion, go read Exodus and read what the Egyptians,

what the Pharaohs tried to do with the Hebrew women to make them kill the newborn baby boys, not the females, the baby boys. Society wants power. The people in power want control. Controlling a society is about demoralizing, demasculizing the men. And so I respect women.

Like I just said, I'm so grateful. I wouldn't be who I am without my mother who raised us, who is a huge, huge part of my life. I have three sisters. I have a wife and a daughter. Like I honor women. But bro, we got to step up as men and we can't be surprised that there's an attack happening. Well, why are people surprised? Because they're not willing to consider the darkness of the world.

When I think of determination. I think of somebody like you. I think of somebody like Oprah. I think of myself. And not because I'm determined to get clients or build a business or Oprah's determined to be a great talk show host. I see determination because I see the evil, the capacity for evil and wrongdoing in people. Because we can be determined to destroy ourselves. We can be determined to do bad things at time, to self-sabotage, to hurt.

I've been all of those things. I've heard stories about Oprah Winfey being those things at times. I've seen you self-sabotage. You've admitted to it here on this call. Determination is to do good and you can also be determined to do bad. There's light and dark to everything. And to not acknowledge that in yourself is not only hypocritical, it's hypocrisy. And so, yeah, man, got to be willing to go into the darkness.

We could talk all day long about this. No, I mean, and I think it's needed, man, because like I can, I can relate this to you you said that you can't just be that one i can't just have that one free to lay chip i can't have that one beer like dude like i make decisions in my life currently based on the darkness okay i know where i'm going to go if i do x y z right if i didn't walk today i knew i wouldn't wake up tomorrow to go to the gym i know if yesterday i said okay let's go over to so-and-so's house let's have some beers i'm fucked like i i i'm not that just one person i don't have addictions okay i don't have that but i know how to self-sabotage myself that's that's a double whatever i

know how to self-sabotage right that's something that i can go through in in in understand unequivocally that okay if i go do this right now i'm going to play to those loud voices in my head that tell me i ain't shit yeah right right And I'm going to honor them too much instead of now I'm just trying to suffocate them by giving them zero opportunity to present more evidence that I am that weak bitch, right? And for the people that are listening right now, I'm interested to hear your opinions, right? Because we're touching on some topics today, like going into the darkness and understanding how you self-abotage yourself. Shoot me some emails, some questions. Like you guys want answered because at shan.

dot French at the determinist society.com because here's the thing guys there is an attack on our society look at everything that's going on in america i can't speak of what's going on in estonia but it begs the the thing that nick just talked about the only way that the people in charge can have that control is if men are weak yeah 100 percent and it's very i mean go ahead sorry go ahead no i'm just i'm on a rant i'm just saying because the bottom line is like the people doing nothing there in their lives, whether you're male or female, it's because you're not fucking listening to yourself. Yeah.

You know what you need to do. Everybody knows what they need to do. Now when it comes to building businesses, there are certain strategies that you need to follow. Hell, I'm still working through that. But I'm talking about it at a personal level. Yeah.

Like, you know, when you go out to a... Went out to lunch with my wife and my daughter yesterday. It was a great place called Christophilmognege here in Fort Myers. Christo. I love their burgers. Love their burgers. love their fucking Cajun Jambalaya, their chicken Alfredo.

I got a fucking salad with grilled chicken. It wasn't fun, but I knew what I had to do. I could have given in. Could have given in. Yep. It's just one, but it's never about that.

Right? So we know as human beings. We can talk about it sort of blue in the face. Yeah. I love that you did that too, man. Because I know the feeling. Like there's, there's always a choice,

and generally the choice that is made is the one that puts you into this, this potential for a tailspin. And at the very least, put you in a place where you're not doing what it is that you know you should do, ought to do, want to do, maybe even have verbally told other people that you're going to do. And that's when it gets, that's when it gets dangerous to the people around you because, you know, like accountability is an effective thing because it can get you to do things. but it's also effective if you're someone who cares about character because you will see the people

in your life lose respect for you if you don't do what you said to them you're going to do. So for example, with your wives, with my wife, we had a conversation two days ago where it was brought up like the bank account of are you doing what you said you would do. There's been more withdrawals than deposits in the last couple of days when it's like, okay, well, can I ask her to show me the respect that I want from my significant other that I need in order to feel certain things that I've asked her to prioritize? Here's what I need for me to show me respect. Can I ask her to do that, expect her to do that if I'm not doing what it is that I say I'm

going to do? No, because that's hypocritical. And it's unfair. And life isn't fair. Life shouldn't be fair. But the truth is, is like most of the, most of the negative experience that we have in our life is happening because of the way we see ourselves. It's not because the world is the way that we see it.

It's the world isn't the way it is. It's the way that we see it. And we see it that way because of our internal dialogue. So, man, when you're dialed in and when you're saying no to the burger and yes to the chicken salad because you made a commitment to do that, you're going to see the world very differently. And you're going to have more gratitude and you're going to have more patience and you're going to feel more love because you're feeling those things for yourself. And ultimately, that is the thing to prioritize is how do you feel about yourself? Because when you feel a certain

way about yourself, other people are going to feel that from you. Why? Not because they're telepathic. Not because they saw you order the chicken or they recognized it and said, good job because you are overflowing with those feelings. And so we can get into as far left as you want to go with frequencies and energetics and the law of attraction.

And we can go all the way to the opposite side of Andy Frizzellas and David Goggins and the West Watson's of the world that are being very direct and calling you out. It doesn't matter. Everybody's really saying the same thing. It's internal. It starts there. That's where it all

goes. 100% man and we could go for hours um let's start to land the plane a little bit here i want to know well i want you to explain to the audience how they can work with you man the academy of maximized potential i want i want the listeners to know where they can find you and again it's going to be the show notes but i want to give you the opportunity to talk about your program and how you're helping men and individuals all over the globe so when i was when i was first working with men i thought that the whole kind of kid and caboodle man like the whole bag of tricks needed to be thrown at them in order to get them to where they wanted to be better relationships more money more freedom

more respect more confidence and so I thought that I needed to teach them a bunch of new skills you know, hey, let me teach you how to be more articulate. Let me teach you how to how to dress better and show up with more confidence because of those things. Let me talk to you about writing down a vision and your goals and having clarity around what matters most to you, all of that stuff. And we got to work on many of those things and clients got results. But I also noticed that a lot of guys fell off, didn't take action, weren't consuming the content.

And so I took a step back and I started asking myself like, why am I teaching these things if they're not working for most men? And I had to get honest, man. Like I was selling stuff that I thought I needed to sell to make money. And I said, you know what? I don't feel good about that. I don't want to be that guy. And so I made the decision when I started AMP, when I launched AMP, that I want to sell what's working for me, what's always worked for me. And what's always worked for me is being in the best physical condition,

period. During seasons, when I wasn't making any money, I had no credibility. Being in great shape got me into a lot of rooms. It got me opportunities. When I was disciplined with what I was eating, I was better with my finances. I was not making stupid choices on the weekends with alcohol because I knew that too much alcohol led to too much overeating. I started making better choices with my finances when I was prioritizing my fitness. And when I was doing all those things, my relationships with women changed, how I dealt with women changed. And so I started to think about that as a married man, as a father. And I just stripped everything away and I said, when I'm prioritizing my health, when I'm prioritizing my fitness, my finances and my relationships

are better. What is more important for men? These are the only things. These are the only areas that men have hired me in the past to help them with. Their relationships fallen off or done. Their finances are all over the place. Their health and fitness is no longer a priority. So I launched AMP to help men solve the biggest problem that men have, which is prioritizing their health and fitness, getting themselves to show up and do that part of their day, whether they feel like it or not, and to allow that momentum to change their mindset, to change the way they feel about themselves, and to spend time every single morning before or after the gym, thinking through what's happening to them emotionally, so that they can show up in their day and not react emotionally.

So they can be more stoic, so they can make decisions more. rationally and logically. So they cannot be clouded by the decisions of the past, sedated, hung over, you know, distracted, all those things. And so, dude, what we do at AMP is simple, man. We give guys seven steps. We call it the playbook. It's seven steps to get you into the right, a mental, emotional, and physical state before your day begins. So some call it a morning routine. You can simplify it like that if you want, but it's much more than that, man. This is saving people's saving their marriages, getting them back into the best shape. Like me, I don't know if, if, if, uh, anybody would believe this, but, you know, I played

college and, you know, tasted a little pro ball. I'm in the best shape of my life at 41. And so at the end of the day, man, it's character development and it's, it's working for guys and it's like so fun, bro, just to see guys having these breakthroughs and this belief, self-esteem's improving, confidence, all those things through the program. program. That's awesome. Do you group calls and all that kind of good stuff to get them all together and network with each, network with each other? Yeah, the brotherhood's a piece of it. And that's a powerful piece. The group training in this environment, I think, is more powerful than one-on-one.

And it's proven to me already. So we have a custom app. We deliver custom training and nutrition programs. And when I say custom, I do mean custom to the individual. And then we have the group coaching, which is all about accountability and following through. We do check-ins every Sunday, getting feedback from all the clients to make sure that they're on track, making adjustments when and where necessary. But generally, the guys don't need adjustments, right? Like, what they really need is to just do what they're doing. And most guys are three weeks in and they're not seeing the results yet.

So they want to change their nutrition program. They want to change their weight routine. And I'm like, bro, this is why you're not getting results because you keep changing things too prematurely. We're going to continue to do exactly what we're doing. And we're going to do it until we know we need to. to stop. So wrap your mind around forever and just show up and do it. And so, and it's like, dang, once they string together instead of three weeks, which is what most people think is enough,

I put together three weeks, I can go on the weekend and screw off. No, I'm talking, think three years. We're turning this into a lifestyle. And that's why guys after 30 days are losing 20 pounds. because those types of guys have never gone even two weeks before they fell off. Like I had one guy, Joe Schleiker come in and he shares this openly on the group call so I can share it. But he was drinking a six pack a night. He was not going to the gym, not exercising. I mean, he's 5'8. He came at 234, bro.

He was, you know, that's a little guy with a lot of weight. And after a month, he dropped 28 pounds. literally starting to see lines of his abs. They're not out, out, but you can see lines in his ass. He looks like a totally different human being. Why? We got him to stop drinking. He's now over 100 days, no drinking, which is a massive shift for him.

But in addition to that, he started doing a bunch of cool things, too. In his business, he was working for somebody, started his own business, something he wanted to do for years. Now he has the confidence to do it. It's amazing what happens when you prove little things like your ability to go to the gym when you said, wake up when you said. You start thinking bigger in every area of your life. But that's why I simplified it down to these things, bro.

Because like, yes, I can teach you how to sell better. Yes, I can teach you how to create a better offer and messaging that's going to resonate with an audience. I can teach you all those things. But dude, if you don't do it consistently, it's not going to make any bit of difference. If you don't commit to it and follow through on it for months and years, you're not going to get to where you want to go. And you're never going to feel the way you want to feel about yourself.

So that's why we created AMP, man. It's about character. It's about character development. Now, that's not what we sell because nobody cares about that. That's not sexy. Right. Right. How about some abs while you're at it?

You feel me? Yeah, exactly. No, dude, dude, again, I'm going to have that in the notes and they can go. They can click on your link. They can go check it out. See if it's something that they want to dive into. And if you guys are listening right now and things that Nick is saying is resonating with you, I strongly encourage you to click on the link and go check them out, right?

Join his brotherhood. you know learn from him and and be your best self um did i appreciate the show i appreciate you coming on and uh dude it's been way too damn long man this is something that should have been done a long time ago but uh i'm i'm glad it did finally happen and we're here on a beautiful sunday and uh you know i'm going to go eat some lunch and hop in the pool with my four year old and just fuck around the rest of the day maybe go for a run tonight i don't know well bro it's it's it's been fun to sit back and watch i mean i appreciate you again acknowledging me, but dude, I've been watching your growth, your commitment, your discipline,

what you're doing with the podcast, the moves that you're making with social media, like the perseverance, man, like I'm equally as inspired by what you're doing. I'm not surprised by any because you just, you're a high character guy. And I love to see the priority around your health and fitness because I know, bro, for me, any man, you're going to experience massive, massive of growth because of that commitment, man, because I know it's important to you. So I'm excited to keep part of my man. I appreciate it. I receive all that.

And coming from you, it means, it means something. So anyway, guys, with that being said, check out my boy, Nick Connor. Go see what he's got going on. And one thing I want to leave you guys with today is something we've talked about the whole show. You know what you need to do. You know what you need to do in your relationship with your wife or your husband or your boyfriend and your girlfriend. kids you know what you need to do in your nutrition you know what you need to do for your body you know what you need to do spiritually let's make today the moment where you just actually follow

through and not judge yourself if you don't have the results just yet let's turn this into a lifestyle yeah i promise you 30 60 90 days 120 days help 180 days six months you'll look back and you won't even recognize the person that you are because you'll be so far away from that person you were six months ago. So with that being said, guys, commit to that, Nick. Once again, thank you, brother. I appreciate you. I value you. And I love you to death, man. Feelings mutual, bro. Thank you for having me. You got it, brother. Anytime.