The Dick Show - Episode 121 - Dick on Unintended Consequences

Episode Date: September 25, 2018

My obsession with retaining walls, my dad stealing koi, I finally find the mysterious Wage Gap everyone is always complaining about, my violent ranting gets a beautiful woman off on Drunken Peasants, why diversity is a weakness, swing dancing, frozen yogurt for Hitler, the death of Fight Night 2, swing dancing, destroyed suits, Nick Rekieta interviews a pedophile and sends a real Cease and Desist letter to Maddox and Landau, Kaya Orsan from The Official Podcast defends his stalking charge, and an erotic squirting horror story from a real man; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

I got an important shit to do today. You got, I got fucking work to do today, man. Okay. I got work to do today. Yeah! Welcome to Dig! You want diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin'gin' diggin' diggin' diggin'gin' diggin' diggin'gin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin'gin' diggin'gin' diggin' diggin' diggin'gin' diggin'gin' diggin'gin' diggin'gin'gin' diggin'gin' diggin'gingin' diggin' diggin' diggin'gin'gin' diggin' diggin'gin' diggin'gin' diggin'gingin' diggin'gin' diggin' diggin' diggin' diggin'gin'gin'gingin' dig you on diggin' you dig you got it. See only show where everything is a contest coming from coming to you live from a mountain bunker deep in the heart of the city of failure.

I am your host Dick Masterson aka the 20 million dollar man. Recently voted America's best Mexican three weeks running with me is not no one will ever top that. You think they're going to vote another someone else America's best Mexican. First of all, you can't. Well, for the first week, you had it forever. I had it forever. You got to wait. I mean, there's a statute of limitations on that. It's not like a video game speedrun, you could just challenge it two and ten seconds later. You got to wait on that with me as always is Sean the audio engineer. Hello, deck. Hey, what's up, buddy? Man, I am out of sorts.

Yeah. I am out of sorts. Yeah. I am out of sorts. My brain is divided. I'm at, you get to a Civil War in the brain. You get to a certain age and as a man, your biological clock starts ticking and all you can think about is retaining walls and decks. Okay.

Telling you Sean, it's true. It's very true. Baby, turn it like Drake, right? Yeah Retaining wall. Oh, let me see that wall bitch. Maybe let me see that wall Get those just go all the way up Yeah, I'm gonna drill a hole in this wall so I could fuck it. I Love me some retaining walls Sean. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, God love me some retaining walls, Sean. Yeah, yeah.

Oh, God. You probably need retaining walls around here. Oh, I need them. I need them in my heart. If I lived in somewhere like Nebraska, you can't, you know, what? What a Bayer retaining wall. A Bayer retaining wall.

A Bayer retaining wall. It's just four retaining walls. That's true. A lot of things are retaining walls that you don't know are retaining walls. A Bayer's been as like a superset of. Retour a subset of. Stairs are basically are retaining walls. Yeah. A ball. You know, a super set of stares are basically little retaining walls.

Yeah. That's what I've been building in my backyard. Oh, stairs. Yes, stairs up my hill. Conquering nature. Fucking mother nature. Yeah. Whether she consents or...

No, that's not true. She consents, obviously. Are they railroad ties? No, I went. I went as ghetto as possible on this one. Okay. Two by, two by eights. Two by eights in Rebar, Sean.

Oh, wow. Ooh, baby. This is an engineer. Wow. Who built these steps to engineer? To hold them? Yeah. An engineer built these steps.

That's ghetto. Either a minor jumped forward in time and was stranded in this yard and decided to build the janky steps ever built or an engineer built these steps I can I can picture them and they look horrible They you know what fuck they actually kind of do I was real proud of myself like brand new like two by eights and rebar Yeah, that's got to look Fuck you, you know what? I was looking 80s girl and I were in the yard. Has your dad seen them?

Yeah. I'm terrified. Oh yeah. You should be. You should be. I'm like, my dad's home constructions. Also, fucking suck. Okay.

I would never say that to his face. But the last time I went a couple of years ago, once my dad's house, he likes building ponds. That's his deal. Yeah. You show him, man, you show him a backyard pond. He will get hard as a fucking rock. Well, I remember him.

He's always had a coy pond ever since I've known you. Oh, yeah, that's his jam. Yeah, and the crazy Dalmatian used to eat the fish. Eat the coalf. To your, yeah, much to your father's. My dad, my fucking father. Okay, my dad loves his coy ponds. Yeah.

You know, you leave him alone in a yard for too long. You'll come back and it'll look like Babe the Blue Ox made the 10,000 legs of Mississippi or whatever Missouri out in the, he just loves Minnesota. Where are the Lakers from? He used to have these coy ponds with his like, okay, with stolen coy. Oh, he filled

them. I had longer. This is a longer story. I thought of a really? Yes. Well, you know, expropriated coy. I don't think they were technically stolen. What was he like? He raiding Japanese restaurants. He would sneak every every Chinese restaurant or Japanese restaurant. We ever the one with the fish tank. It's Chinese restaurants. No, but no, Japanese restaurants, like a lot of them will have the pond around like the outside. Sometimes where it's yeah, they have like turtles and and coins. When we were kids, every time we went to a Japanese restaurant,

my dad would make us wear those cranberry harvesting pants. We go around like, where you going around? Like, what you're not supposed to get water inside? I think we're gonna smoke up a fish out of here. It's like, duh, idiot, dick, they work in reverse. Yeah. It's not a valve, it doesn't go either way. Like, all right, dad.

So as soon as the major D of the Japanese restaurant would turn around, my dad would get real close to him to see if his eyes were really shut. Like, are you sleeping? He'd take a bucket and he'd fill our pants up with water and Koi. And then we'd have to slosh home. Okay. Look, my dad loves retaining. He loves ponds. Excuse me, I'll let you know. Yeah. Yeah. He loves Koi ponds. And he was when he became the HOA president, he got so pissed off about the HOA giving him tickets for his yard work, for his like additions to his house.

He built the fucking first of all. Really? Yeah, he built a, he built a, he built a, he built a, was doing stuff in his front yard? No, in the backyard, but you could see it from the, and yes, and yes, he's built, he's built some things in the front yard too.

Okay. They look nice. It's funny because I never thought that, like those houses have been around a long time and they're, they's built, he's built some things of the brand new too. They look nice. It's funny because I never thought that, like those houses have been around a long time and they don't seem like, they're not like tracked homes at all. They're all different. No, they're not all different. No, they're not all different.

They have like five or six designs and they flip them. Oh, I had no idea. Yeah, that's the house I grew up in from the early 2010. Okay, so there's an HOA, it was like a master plan thing. Yeah, it's a, so he built a, he built an awning in the backyard. He's had a couple, he's had a couple of wins and a couple of fuckups. Let me say, his awning was the wrong color.

Yeah. So he got a ticket from the HOA and he, so he said, oh, well, fuck y'all, I'm the HOA. Now, so he ran for the HOA and like canvas the neighborhood and would hit do his Trump shit running for he won. He got elected to the president of the HOA and is all right, all of my stuff's approved. And then, well, and then he started, he was put in charge of like bankruptcies. When people would get their homes foreclosed on, because it was a while ago, so it was during the time that spike of foreclosures

happened. He would have to, because he was H.O.A. President, he would have to be at the house when the police showed up to get shit out of the house. So if he saw anything he wanted, like he would come home with, one time he came home with a box of drumstick popsicles. He said he found them in the house.

He's like, well, they weren't gonna use them. They're getting there. And he took their drum sticks. One chance do we have of any higher politicians not being corrupt. Yeah, I mean, it starts there. The HOA president can't play by the rules. I mean, like, you know, shit's disappearing

from all of their copper wires ripped out of the house. It's not their house anymore. Yeah, yeah. The bank's house. Hey, you're stealing from a bank. Fuck the bank. Fuck the bank's drumstick. Oh, boy.

They're my drumsticks now. I'm the age-o-way now. A box of drumsticks. Yeah, and one of the spoils of his pillaging of his eminent domain, of his own personal eminent domain was a bunch of coiphish. You know what, I don't have any problem with that if the people are, because they're just gonna die. Yeah, they're gonna, I mean, you know what I mean?

Walked up the street with two buckets, like fucking like Fantasia. That's why I'm in the rescue. That's why I'm in the rescue. That's why I'm in the rescue. That's why I'm in the rescue. That's why I'm in the rescue. Oh, that's what I'm doing.

That's what I'm doing. That's what I'm doing. That's what I'm doing. That's what I'm doing. That's what I'm doing. That's what I'm doing. That's what I'm doing. Oh, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that Do that? Yeah, the woman, the woman coy will, I go up to the top and the guys will come up and slap this shit at her with their tails, there's knock her eggs out. Really? Yeah, that's true. That's true, I've seen it. I forget why I started telling this stupid story.

Well, because I don't know, the coy ponds, and the dog used to fucking eat the coy. Well, yeah, because so my dad always, he would, You had the most brain damage delmation and in a brain damage breed. That was my sister's dog Yeah, that dog was so fucking weird. I remember I took care of him one time when everybody was out of town that dog

You love feeding universe, but you would feed him. Yeah, you would feed him and he would not eat if you were looking at him Yeah, you he would not eat you could stand there for an hour and he would not eat his food You had you had to what it would like if he'd look at you in the house Yeah, he would not eat. You could stand there for an hour and he would not eat his food. You had to, you had to, like if he'd look at, you'd be in the house. He was, it was like he just got out of prison. That guy, like he would always be eyeballing you and he's ready.

Right. So weird. My dad killed all of his coifish because he would always leave the hose on. Trying to refill it, is it the water would evaporate or what. No, look, there always problems with his ponds. Okay.

Okay. My point was there's always fucking problems with his coy ponds. Just the same way that there's going to be problems with my retaining walls. So I will, he put up another set of stairs that's got a banister. He built in a banister next to it for balance, but the banister is built out of whatever thorny concoction they used to make Jesus' grounds. So it's the most dangerous banister you've ever seen.

I will put, so I'm terrified. So I'm going to cry or patch. Yeah, it's like, what the fuck is this, dad? This is a trap that you have set up for people. Just like, if I use this, if I climb your stairs, I'm going to get this, people are gonna think I have this stigmata, all right, funny? What the fuck did you do?

So, number one, I'm terrified for him to see the stair. Like, I'm already having imaginary arguments in my head of the shit that my dad's gonna say about my fucking stairs. I'm gonna go out there with a level, of which is like polishing deck chairs on the Titanic because it's still rebar in two by sixes. And it's on a hillside, it's not like they're gonna stay like that. I mean, let all that.

The most relieved I was when I got back up to the house and realized, okay, you can't see them. That's fine. They're fine. They're doing their job. I don't know, I'll go down there and put a little, I'll put a tarp over them. Maybe so people can't see him from the other end. Okay. Anyway, that's what I that's what I got the I got the bug man. Oh, baby. I got that bug.

I got that retaining wall bug man. Mount Rushmore just just basically a retaining wall. Yeah. The constitution is basically a retaining wall for tyranny. Sean, everything is a retaining wall. Uh huh. I got the bug when I'm soar as fuck. Yeah. So you did this what? Yesterday, yesterday, all day, all yesterday, I worked, I worked along and hard two and a half hour day. Yeah. Other day older taxation is theft. You know that song. Soars hell. Soars hell anyway, we launched a bonus episode today. Yeah. I put that up.

It's good. It's really good. It's really good. Oh, God. It's, I say it's in my top three only because I'm sure that I like another two a lot. Yeah, yeah. It was just, it was just so much fun.

And you're really really it's really The documentation of an insane person Of somebody with with no grass on reality anymore. Yeah It was having not consumed Maddox content as I haven't in like two years. Yeah, it is it was Un it was weird to watch him lie. Yeah. So egregiously like he's, he's changed significantly in two years. He's out of his fucking tree. All the way from calling the super cut of how many people he calls a stalker. Yeah. That was one of the funniest things I've ever had in the show, I think. To the downplaying of the biggest problem in the universe.

Yeah, and I just realized that he said, you know, some podcasts that ended four years ago, didn't it end in 2016? Yeah, I didn't do two years ago. So, I mean, he even, it's even like, it's so long ago I can't remember anything. It's just, oh, you can't remember anything, buddy, that's the truth. His half-sister's suicide, the human shield that he's dragging up is his

sister's body and using her as a sympathy shield. His sacrifice for his father's sacrifice of his country. Yeah. So what we did was, what Sean and I did mostly Sean what did we brought in a Crime analyst yes who has worked for the FBI in the past and he had just a big thank you a very big Thank you special agent Richard head. Yeah who came in and he was a good he was a good guest besides that I mean he fit right in I thought he was wonderful. Yeah, he was wonderful. He's very knowledgeable Yeah, he had that that Dexter feel to him. He was like Dexter meets Monk where he kind of draws you in with his mysterious silence. And then he'll say like something poignantly morbid and factual. And you're like, oh, okay. Yeah. You do, you do work when serious stuff all day.

Yeah, you do work with serious stuff all day. Very interesting, dude. He went through with us and explained, Maddox's tells the way people lie, stuff like that. What he says is he said at the beginning of the episode is he considers bullshit science. But as we went along, he started believing it. Wasn't that funny? Yeah, yeah, it was.

And I mean, I think he clarified that it. Like, wasn't that funny? Yeah, yeah, it was. And I mean, I think he clarified that it's like, well, obviously it's not as good as DNA evidence or anything like that. I mean, it's not, it's obviously not foolproof, but yeah, I mean, you can go through and you can really see the whoppers with that, you don't need to play the audio. And you're like, oh man, is he fucking lying his ass off?

Oh yeah, that was incredible. So watch the video on that. Payton.com slash the dictionary. The video's essential to that episode. It's well worth it. What are you gonna say? I was just gonna say the one thing, and this is, you know, Doug read fucking some,

some, you know, very pointed questions. And this is not an indictment of Doug at all, but just, and no, and what I'm about to say, but this is something that, and it's never gonna happen again because he's not gonna do it. He's not gonna do that same stupid thing twice, probably, although his track record would show other ones. He's gonna do a stupider thing.

Yeah, but I would have just wanted to say, because he would, he would throw these things out like, you know what, we could get into it, but, and then off to something else. And just once I want somebody to say, you know what, the floor is yours. Just clarify, could you clarify that one point? And then just sit there until he walks off the set.

Because like, that's, do you know what I'm saying? John, no, I'm that's, you know what I'm saying? John, no, I'm laughing because you know how that would go? It would be the end of Billy Madison when Eric gets asked about business ethics and goes, well, the thing is, ah, it's a gun out. He's a fucking deranged mental patient now. But he's always to some extent been let off the hook

for the sake of the radio basically. And that's just once we're like, you have as much time as you need, just clarify this one point. We need to say, we could get into it. And I could tell you this and that, but you know, false narrative. And my half sister killed herself

and my dad's deaf and one ear. And you know, it's just been a rough year for me. And my girlfriend got a restraining order because it's shit I made her do. And you know, yeah, it's just like these guys are stalkers and pedophiles and not saying anything. Gavin McGinnis and he's like, everything Maddox says is like that Miss Teen USA answer where it's just a cornucopia of bullshit and deflection.

It's so fucking uncomfortable to watch a grown man extract spaghetti from his mouth. Like it's gonna, you know what I'm saying? It's so uncomfortable to watch this deranged person in such a state. It's sick. It's like watching a sick fucking animal. And as a predator, I can't resist. Right? That's right. Well, there you go. You admitted it. Oh, yeah. Yeah. God speaking of predators.

No, nothing new in the, nothing new in the Cody Wilson. Oh, God. God, I'm still beat up about that. Yeah, what a, what a fucking, we talked about it in the bonus episode while it was fresh, but my God. What do you think that's, like, do you think that's any possibility? That's a total setup. No. No, I don't think so. That's just one of those things.

I mean, I just, I mean, I don't, I don't normally go there too, but it's like if he's an enemy, you go, what sights does he go to? Well, okay. What blah, blah, blah, blah. Here's what he does. Okay, you know what I mean? You can see, you know, okay. Okay. Here's what he does. Okay. You know what I mean? You can see, you know, that could certainly be the plot of a movie.

If it was a setup, I would have expected Cody to tweet by now or say something like this is a total setup. Yeah. What's much more? Well, what if he doesn't know? I mean, he got arrested in Taiwan. No, I mean, so no, but I mean like he frequents, he maybe he frequents those sites. Maybe he, you know what I mean? And they're like, oh, okay, you're going to be the girl

who talks to him. Like that's, oh man, this is far fetched. And I don't, I normally, I normally don't, I normally don't go here, but it's just a thought. Something in you wants to go there. Well, I mean, I'm not, I'm not using it. I'm not saying that to call you out, but that's a, that a lot of a lot of guys are expressing like, it's just a thought. It's just a thought. It's like, would it, I mean, the United States government has installed leadership in other countries. You can't put anything by them. I mean, it's nothing. No, I mean, we've, no. America's certainly been guilty of what we call other nations out for doing a lot.

America, the American government made a secret deal with all of the big telecom corporations to intercept, analyze, and store all of our electronic communications. Like, there's nothing, you know, there's nothing that they will not do. Nothing, nothing, they have listened, they intercepted the internet.

It's the most egregious overreach and violation of personal privacy and like a liberty and autonomy on that's ever been in history, ever. I'd prefer a premonactus. I would prefer the king of, I'd prefer a bunch of guys kicking down my door because at least I could blast some of them rather than not having the ability to email anybody ever, ever.

There's nothing they won't do. That said, I don't think, I don't think, oh man, I have a hard time saying this is a set up. No, I'm virtually sure you're right. They're just, it's just a thought. It's just a thought. I don't know how, you know, like I'm not actively believing that. But generally, the most obvious thing is what happens.

What happened? The most charitable thing, the most likely scenario seems to be, guy goes on a website where you can find hookers because prostitution being illegal that it is, you're kinda on your fucking own. And the busier you are, the harder it is to get them, which it should be, if fucking, if Uber could bring you hookers, hookers and drugs, there would be no more credit. Nobody would be, but Amazon would be nothing. Cause nobody would need this compulsive urge

to buy anything, to fill the drug in the pussy hole in their fucking heart. You know what I mean? It's, anyway, nobody could leave their house. Nobody would leave their house. That's all I need, drugs and prostitutes. Oh yeah, different fucking world. Nike, what are they?

Oh, they make a hundred dollar shoes. Why would I buy a hundred dollar shoes? Walk around. Walk around. Walk around. You mean like a hooker? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

He mean like to get in an Uber? To get in a hand job? Yeah. Hand job Uber? Yeah. It's a shame. Most charitable, I would think that he used the site and then got caught doing it.

And then that's when the political machine should hold of it. Right, right. Councilor, who's so fucking concerned, right? And then cops, yeah, Taiwan's got it, well, everybody, you know, this is how much attention we paid all criminals. Yeah, well, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is there like a, you know, are they're going to extradite

him? They've already had, oh, they already have. So it's like, they kicked him out. They kicked him out. They kicked him out. They don't have an extradition treaty. Okay. They just kicked him out of the country. So where's he going to go? And the only thing that annoys, like it sucks because he's, I mean, as a figure head for 3D printed guns, I don't see how this doesn't end it, which ended for him. How the fuck do you get around this? I don't know. Right? I don't know. Unless all that video evidence is, unless it's all fake, for God's sake, please let it be fake. Please let it be fake. Well, I mean, again, wouldn't you think he would have said something?

Yeah, I would have. I would have. Yeah, but I, but, you know, I, I, I go against lawyers wishes a lot. They always say anything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, yeah, that's a bummer. Uh, I don't know, man, you, what will we talk about it in the bonus episode? It really, it really makes me

arrange how as a society we've found the ultimate high ground maneuver. Like nobody, nobody is about fixing solutions anymore. It's not, or maybe they never were, but it's not about fixing anything. It's just about looking the most virtuous. And that means I hate pedophiles. Like that's the worst, that's the most virtuous you can be. Yeah. So everything becomes trying to, it's like a,

it's like that game you play as kids, like you put your hands on the bat and the closer and closer you get to the handle, the more, that's the winner. And then the person who puts the eagle claw on top is the one who finally, in some way, makes somebody else look like a pedophile. Even though they're fucking, obviously fucking not. It's like, well, as long as you can convince a bunch of idiotic magazines to run the headline,

sex with a child. Is that a fucking thing? Is that what happened? Is that what happened here? You son's a bitch. Well, it's 100% about perception. The cops went, cops weighing in. Oh yeah, my deputies said the only way they mistake her age

is if they mistook it for being younger than what it is. Oh fuck you, you fat sack of shit. Don't, is this the editorial edition of this press conference? Yes. Thanks, thanks, officer. Thank you very, thanks for that dynamo drop in, you scumbag. Yeah. She answers the door and put, yeah, yeah.

Anyway, the drunken peasants, I went real, real WF on the drunken peasants. You did win, were you on? Last night, 80s girl that made a drop into, oh really? Like the Sasquatch. She ran across the camera on us. Oh, yeah, yeah.

I'll play that in a little bit. Let's see. Nick, Nick, Rackett's interviewed Tito. He did. Okay, now I knew that was happening. I didn't know that. It was a little disturbing. Yeah, tell you.

Really? Was it a long interview? It was a long interview. And it was uncomfortable, I would say, if anybody's seen it. Yeah, I don't know if I really want to watch that. It's tough, man, because it's tough to watch a guy kind of lie and shift his, hard to swallow.

Yeah, to swallow a lot of things. Was that what he was doing? Like a lot, I mean, yeah, he was trying to pull the sympathy card and then he's like, oh yeah, that's why a lot of sex offenders are homeless. So like that. It's like, yeah, buddy, but because why? You know, you know, because there's a stigma against them. Something, some nonsense like that. He was trying to lump himself in with other people. I'm saying, yeah, okay, you're a different breed, my friend. But I, as I said in the bonus episode, the important thing to keep in mind is that

the bad ombre got canceled from Maddox's show because Tito couldn't keep his mouth shut. Yeah, so fuck with this show and you will lose something. Yeah, not by any fault of our own. No, but that's what happens. You just keep chirping, you keep fucking chirping and you will get stopped. You lost the only, you buddy, you lost the only thing

that probably wasn't soiled by your petarasti. And you did it because you couldn't stay the fuck away from us and shut the hell up. So shut the fuck up now, please. All right, I'll tell you what makes me rage. This week, swinging dancing clubs suits. Well, are there, I mean, I didn't think that was really a thing since like swingers in the 90s.

Because there was a huge resurgence of swing dancing. That whole, that was the worst time in my life. Oh, yeah. I agreed to go to this club with 80s girl. Yeah. Last week. Uh-huh. Thinking, being told, you know, very, very peripherally

that it was a, that it was like a big band kind of club. Sean and I walked in and all the nightmares of the late 90s piled on me at once. OK. Like a snap back in time of this awful period and in pop culture when everything, when people were swing dancing and listening to swing music and twirling each other around and taking classes. Yeah.

Took, oh, God. Yeah. And the, and the, and these assholes that, these assholes that somehow know how to swing dance just appeared like they grew out of the earth. Why, I don't know why the hell they knew how to dance like this, but all of a sudden it was like, the chances are a million to one that they would ever need this information and here it was.

Now they were the bell of the ball. Well, they may have been, you know, there's always gonna be a very small hardcore faction of people who are like identify with a certain era or style and they lived that way. And so all of a sudden they were like, oh, I can do this and people want to learn to do something that I've lived. So I think that's kind of what happened. Let me tell you something though.

At this place, it was a swing dancing club. Yeah. There are so many single chicks there that they're dancing with each other. Oh wow. If you are, I know every single time a guy has a problem with a, with girls on the show, one of the biggest claims is, I don't know where to meet girls. That, look, if you're that hard up and it is a deal with Satan, what I'm telling you to do, but my God, it was, it was like a four-H convention there.

Pretty little heppers all lined up in her row. I couldn't, like they're standing there waiting for imaginary men to come dance with them that do not exist. I think I was the only one there. I was the only man there under 80 who did not have some weird Salvador Dolly who did not have some some weird Salvador Dolly who did not have two mustachees on. I saw a guy with one mustache on below the other two mustachees on his lip. Yeah. That's how

intricate the mustache. Shary of this event was he shaved it right down the middle and had one curled up and then another curled up under words, both above his mouth and below his nose, both of them. Two mustache, man. This guy's getting action at the swing dancing club. God damn. I show up. I shit you not because I never have caused to wear suit.

Yeah, right. Never. I mean, my suits are 10 plus years old. They fit like shit. It's like strapping into a girdle. Every time I put one on, it's absolutely, I go through that whole thing of putting the suit on and then putting the pants on last because I know what's coming. Yeah, uncomfortableness from the rest of the day.

The suit ties, the suit clenches together at the belly button. And that's the worst place that it clenches together. So I leave it open until the very, I even put my shoes on. And then I put the pants on over it because I dread what's coming next. Put it on and think, okay, well, I'm about three inches short. So maybe I can just wear a belt and I don't have to button it. Yeah. Falls. And you've got fucking roast beef of suit hanging out the sides in the belt. Even with my 10-year-old ill-fitting suit that has literal, that has holes in it.

I don't know why. I don't know. I didn't know that suits decompose. But I look like the shoulder pads might have been flopping like tire flaps on the side. It's got stains on it that our god knows what, splattered up and splattered up the side. Yeah. Because there's never enough time. You gotta wear a suit. It's like, I don't have my, on it that our God knows what splattered up and splattered up the side. Yeah.

Because there's never enough time. You gotta wear a suit. It's like, I don't have my, like, all right, so I gotta get a new one. Now you need to do that two weeks ago. Yeah. I gotta at least dry clean this one. You should have done that yesterday. Yeah.

Well, I guess I'm just wearing a crummy hobo suit to this thing. Even that didn't matter. Yeah. Even that, even with a suit that looks like I just pulled it out of the reject pile at Goodwill, even wearing that. Girls are trying to talk to me at the bar. Unbelievable. Unbelievable with the women are up to.

So that's where you go. So that's where you go. To deal with the devil. It's a deal with the devil. Because you're gonna have to chop your mustache in vertically in tween And you're gonna have to I mean you get cuz it's got to be a horrible look It's all horrible looks Oh, it's fun though

But my god the amount of single especially in LA. Yeah, yeah, your mileage may vary of course Let me see what else I got here Especially in LA. Yeah. Yeah, your mileage may vary. Of course. Let me see what else I got here. Ah, I got some STEM stuff. Pretty funny article I found. Yeah. Yeah, it's funny to me. STEM diversity efforts have unintended consequences.

I'm gonna summarize this for you. They found that they found that all of the push to include women in STEM is making women think that they're not welcome in STEM. Okay. Because before, it was just math is hard. But now, now the message is is math is hard and men hate you. Right? We all got to work together to stop. It's like if suddenly there was a blitz of ads saying beware of car seats that eject you through the roof. If you stop too quickly, beware of that. A lot of people are going to think, wait, is that what, what car seats do that? Is that a thing?

Yeah. No, it's not a thing, but watch out for it. But why are they running the ads then? Women and stab. Let me try to find the stats for this one. The videos increased awareness of gender bias and the sciences, which led women, but not men to ultimately experience decreased anticipated belonging and trust, and increased

negative effect and stereotype threat concerns about the STEM organizations. Because now everybody's aware. Yeah. Yeah. So nothing could be worse for getting women in STEM than running a constant... Running their confidence. Constant onslaught of ad campaigns,

telling all the sexist men and society that they need to be more welcoming of women in STEM. Whoops. I guess it's hard to make an ad. Harder than you thought to make an ad. You fucking idiots. More over for women awareness of gender bias and the sciences was the mechanism underscoring their enhanced social identity threat.

Moving forward, the research is called for women and STEM advocates to be diligent in investigating the possibility of unintended negative outcomes before trying to get more women and STEM. I don't know why, it makes me so happy that that their whole stupid because now they can't stop the ad campaign. Right? Now Google has fed a bunch of money into it. Now everybody's all jacked up on selling women and Stan man unintended consequences. They're such a motherfucker. They're such a motherfucker. Cause really at the core of people is just eternal optimism. And let's charge ahead. I mean, we're not even half cocked.

Fuck it. Now, we got our finger near the gun. Let's go. Let's do it. This has to be done now. We want more women in engineering and STEM. Okay, do you know why they're not in it? No, let's just shout about it.

Let's just shout about it. Yeah. Oh, whoops. Yeah, whoopsies. Oh, that's a good one. Let me see here, I'm gonna, I got more women in STEM stuff too. There was a big brew ha ha over Linux. Do you know Linux operating system?

The guy who invented it stepped down. Is that right? Yeah, there's this brewing controversy over a code of conduct that's in the code. So every code project has like a set of guidelines that you abide by and usually it's not. You know, usually it's license related. As it should be related to the actual code of the system that you're working on. Yeah, that doesn't license.

Coding doesn't seem like a social issue to me or anything like that. Well, it is now. Yeah, there's now. Yeah. There's the contributor covenant. I've seen this before, I've seen it a couple of times before and every time I see it, it pisses me off. It is a set of guidelines for behavior for programmers

that these maniacs, these lunatics, these social justice warriors are trying to insert in all the big open source projects. It's stuff like harassment, bullying, attacks, stuff like that will not be tolerated. So, go ahead. What does that have to do with the coders? Does that, is that, does that enable them to be put on a hook?

Should somebody misuse, quote unquote, the platform down? Like, I'm not sure what, I don't understand the, it means, how do they code that? If a programmer is abusive in any way, if anything that could be, anything that can be considered harassment, and this is bi-matics is standard. So, you know, tweeting at somebody, like using blank phobic language in any way, that person will be- Stating facts. Yeah. Oh, well, facts, of course. That person will be which hunted off the

face of the earth, off of the project has happened. Got you. So nothing to do with what they're writing. Abs. The code you mean. Yeah. Absolutely nothing to code. It is one of the greatest and most shameful invasions of something that is purely mathematical

and programmatic and functional. Yeah. Like you, you're surfing the utility of code with this brazenly progressive attack on the people who, the necessarily neuro atypical people who built it, who cannot understand the nature of feet, like who can't even understand at their core that feelings mean this much to people and that inclusion is possibly the amorphous idea of inclusion is something to be strived for ever. It's an attack on these people who are the ones who build these platforms. Purely for the sake of inclusion and exactly the women and STEM stuff

I was talking about earlier. Yeah, I don't know, maybe I'm not understanding, but it sounds like they're being held to the same standard as what they're trying to make everybody else held to. What do you mean? I mean, like if they, if they're a code, like the job it should be irrelevant, right?

I mean, there's basically saying that in no workplace are these things tolerable. Yeah, but this is like open source hobby stuff. Okay. And it's anything goes. So like even being rude in any way, being highly critical of people, the like basic confrontations that you take for granted in a programming environment are now being pushed out. Like, it is just a way to take jobs away from, take positions of power away from the guys who built the systems in the first place.

Yeah, okay, yeah. It's just, it's a witch, it's like an excuse for a witch hunt. Yeah, and We're opening up more avenues every day. Yeah, and these The idiots who made it are gonna they're getting they've already won they already won they already got line is kicked there They already got their black male their pressured line is and line is tore vaults into stepping down sage sharp Expresses frustration with senior developers who refuse to deliver technical criticism with basic human decency. If your code sucks, you should die.

That's the because if it's if it's fucks up, you'll kill people. And again, it's just because you got your feelings hurt. Like you said, these people aren't necessarily, they're not going to possess the greatest amount of tact. And these are not. Because you probably cost them two weeks of debugging time. Like you took a part of their life, they're never gonna get back

because of your fucking incompetence. That's why you overrode somewhere. Like it's a spaghetti mess of millions of line of cut You fuck up one thing and you ruin you ruin you cost months of human labor You stupid idiot you should be excoriated like that Somebody should knock on your door like a singing telegram with you fuck up a commit in your code and scream it You for exactly exactly as much time as you cost everybody else.

That's the fucking code of contact. The opposite. It's a hateful code of contact. That's what's gonna happen. By participating in this open source project, you agree that if you cost people time with your fuck-ups, we're gonna send a guide here. We're gonna send dickmasters into your house

and he's gonna scream at you for the amount of time everybody else took fixing your fuck up. I don't see why, I don't even know what I'm trying to say, but I don't see why that's an issue, especially in something like that. You expect bluntness, I think. Yeah. It's, yeah, like you fucked up, fix it.

I don't even know what's an example of delivering it without decency. You know, I mean, do they have examples like, oh, and I was told that I was told that I'm a subhuman being who, you know, I, who knows, it's just the way people, it's just the way guys talk. Yeah. That's what they have a problem with, it's just the way guys talk. It's upsetting. Yeah.

It's upsetting to them. Yeah, all right, I'm going to play a song. You know, this is, I'm going to play a song, I'm going to get it coy on. Ah. This one's from Cameron Clark, Cameron Clark, it's called ReFile. There you go. I don't think I played this one yet. I'm telling lies And I was wrong like my friends Refile again, refile again, refile again this time I will

We fight again this time I win We fight again, we fight again We fight again, they're on your ground Morally on this low And the only ones who call it to your show of fight Oh I bet it's fine We fight, I'm fine, I'm fine We fight again, we fight again We fight again this time I win

We fight again, we fight again We fight again this time fight again, we fight again, we fight again We stand on the moon, what happens when you push me into one moreさあ、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、このように、 Is this a moug? I don't know. I mean moves a lot of sense that can make those noises and samples and things I'm sure it's all software cameras a good singer

Cameron Clark All right. I don't need a bunch of zoops, zoops. Oh. Oh, okay, very good, very good. Yeah, it's a move, he says it's a move. Yeah. It's a move.

Oh man, I don't know what to do. Why is so upsetting to me to see code used like that? Like is a weapon in the war of... Yeah. In the war of like whatever, whatever the fuck this culture war we call is, where hurt feelings are trumping everything. It feels like we're entering

in other dark ages to be quite honest. You know what? Yeah. A little bit sick feeling because people who care about hurt feelings don't do shit for human history. They flat out, they're flat out worthless. They don't have, whether they have the intellect for it or the talent,

that obsession with feelings will always trump that. And the more of them who get into positions of power, the more stymied and ruined that industry is. I respect college as an institution, universities, exactly zero. And the research that comes out of them, not zero but approaching it because so much money has spent wasted proving fantasies that ultra-progressives want, you know, entire disciplines of science have arisen over feelings. Yeah. So entire schools of social sciences have just created to do nothing, to further nothing, to contribute nothing to like the quality of life of the regular guy.

Like, why the hell are we? You know, I complain about nuclear power plants getting shut down all the time and this obsession with, this obsession with limiting our use of energy and technology such that we'll enjoy the, such that we'll enjoy the recycled utopia of the third world in a couple generations. Like we're putting actual laws on the book to limit the use of resources and doing nothing on the other side to replenish them, putting people in charge of software projects, which should like, this is something really incredible that we made or stole from a crash landed alien ship if you were to believe my dad,

but the computer is something that we made that's really great and we've only used a little bit of it. The guys that are gonna take us through the rest of it are, they don't care about this shit. Yeah. They don't. Yeah. It's the people who are assholes, the people who hate mediocrity and everything less than the people who are always wrong. You know? Like Steve Jobs, huge prick, everybody fucking hated him. Wrong all the time. But look what he did.

Everybody, everybody who's like that is the ones who make life better for millions of untold, millions of trillions of uncountable people in the future. And getting sniped off one by one with exactly this kind of shit and it works the same every time. Starts with just a little word.

Starts with a little word that's a foot in the door. Well, you don't want, we don't want, squeeze it in there, get that foot in there, abuse. Yeah. We can't have abusive language in this. And everybody who doesn't know looks at the words and say, well, yeah, you know, abuse. Yeah, but it's something we don't want.

Right. But define abuse. Yeah, define it. It doesn't have one. Now it's giving somebody a weird look. Well, we don't want hate. They put that's what they start with every time. We don't want hate. You don't want hate in this. These are extremely relative terms. Like there's no objective. Well, hate, Sean. Surely hate is is you don't want hate in your code, right? You don't want people.

They can't even reason a hate define hate crimes. Like crimes. Like, I mean, is it a hate crime? Is it not? Like, is it, you know, it's a case by case basis. It's hate, this hate shit is absolutely ruining, ruining all of my hopes and dreams for the future that we were ever going to have something nice. I know what you mean about dark ages. Ever going to have, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, it does feel, it does feel that way. Like a regression. Yeah. Like a regression. It absolutely feels like a regression. It feels like we grew up and not everybody else did. And now we got kindergarteners trying to cram kindergarten shit into our big boy industries. Yeah. Like software as a whole. Because if they get it far enough, that's the end. That's the end of everything. All the smart grid stuff, all of the self-driving, any... I'm like, Sean, you don't want your car hate driving. Do you?

You know? I mean, you don't want to drive hatefully. We're not going to... Yeah, you know. Yeah, I mean, sometimes I want it to drive hatefully. We got to give hate a chance. Like, I really feel like it's become so, the pendulum has swung so far the other way

that I am the exact opposite and the antithesis of my parents give love, love generation. And I want to just say, you know what? If there's hate involved in any way, I support it. In any possible way, as long as it doesn't break any laws, if there's hate involved, I'm for it. And if you are not, you're part of the fucking problem. The world needs more hate.

I want to find the police that come at me with a flower and stick a fucking gun in it. Yeah. Right? Right. Stick a gun over the flower. In the fucking flower. Yeah. You know, it's kind of... We're here from the love brigade coming to kill you with our love. Take a fucking

gun. Yeah. What are you going to say? I was going to say just as an aside, in the in the voice actor world, there are a lot of there are a lot of women in positions of power, a lot of voice directors or women. Yeah. Probably probably a little bit more than men for whatever reason. A lot of power, a lot of voice directors or women, probably a little bit more than men for whatever reason, a lot of producers, things like that. And it's very interesting. Is it because it's a support industry? What do you mean? Women are good at support roles. And production too, like all the, a lot of the great, like, PAs and the people on set who are like doing the schedule and stuff. It's all women. Coordinators, stuff like that.

Yeah, Coordinators, stuff like that. They love it. I don't know. I mean, it kind of runs the gamut in my world. But they all kind of say the same thing about kind of what's going on, especially with the people who are like my age and older who have been in the industry for like 20 plus years. And they've actually dealt with what people who are like 20 or 25 are railing against,

but they're just too busy doing their jobs and being successful. It's interesting, they're very much against by and large against what is going on now, because they're like, that's not harassment, like that's not discrimination, that's not, you know what I mean? Yeah. It's interesting that they think a lot more like we do.

Getting felt up at a high school party, I mean, is 36 years later, it wouldn't be something that they're concerned about. That is what you're saying. I don't like that. If you put it like that, they probably wouldn't be, but if it was, if it was an attempted rape, then that's something different.

Yeah. 36 years ago. Yeah, well, I'm talking about this Supreme Court guy now. Yeah, I know, I know. I, it does feel like we're entering another dark ages. And they're never gonna, they don't stop. Like their California's looking at a lot to put, to force companies to put women on the board.

Well, if you don't know what you mean, and there are some, but there are some industries that men are drawn to and women are not. It's not because they're being kept out of, of all of these industries that they may want to be. And it's because this doesn't, sports doesn't interest them. A lot of them the same way that it does men. So it makes sense. It's if you want every board to be 50, 50, that's not reflective of just people's general interests.

It's also going to get women who feel good about being tokens on the board. Like, it's not going to get people who earned positions, whatever it is at that level, to get on the board. It's going to be, it's going to be hires to get people off our back. Like, it's going to be hires who specialize in speaking the language of victimhood. That's going to be the role you need to fill. Yeah. And none of it is, none of it creates value.

No, it's none of this. It's all best. That's my problem with it. None of this creates value. Yeah, it's all bad. None of it. Putting diversity, diversity of anything other than thought. And even in the case of thought, it's not necessarily true.

It's all diversity for diversity. Diversity's bad. That's it. Diversity outside of very strict constraints. Art. You know, and even in the sake of that, if you show up, like if you show up expecting classical music and some, and the fucking blue man group shows up and starts banging on But even in the sake of that, if you show up, like if you show up expecting classical music and some, and the fucking blue man group shows up and starts banging on trash cans

and say, well, diversity is great. No, it's not. It's diversity within strict requirements. Yeah. It's great. And only because in order for it to be great, some of it has to die. That's the diversity's most important part is the, is the death and the evolutionary part of it. You have competing ideas, one of them has to fucking fail.

Yeah, that's what makes it good. It's the conflict that makes, if you have diversity without conflict, you have random chaos. You have nothing. You have nothing. Yeah. Without the kind they're taking the conflict out, because everybody bought it, well, diversity. Gotta have diversity.

Everybody's being made a winner. Yeah, the problem with the diversity without adversity is that nothing gets better. Yeah. They may as well, somebody may very well bring a wonderful new idea into the mix, but without letting, I did without letting some ideas die without letting the system work on its own without shoving shit into it. Doesn't, it's not a strength.

It's a tremendous weakness. I got to get Kyle on here. Hey, Kyle, what's up, man? Are you there? Yeah, I'm here. I was doing fine until you brought up the Linux shit. Oh, are you a coder? By the way, Kyle, you're the co-host of the official podcast for everybody who does know. Do you want to give your bio real quick? Yeah, I mean, I'm not really a big deal. You'll know me as, you know, most notoriously, the 10-year stalker, because you call that mean the man. Yeah.

Yeah, I co-host the official podcast where we've had on Dick twice and a Stereo's and hopefully in the future more people from the Dick Masters multiverse. Yeah. I used to dabble in coding. I mean, I started when I was in my teenage years and only because I wanted to script Kitty together a couple of lines of code so I could make viruses, which then I would send two pedophiles on this German chat room.

Wait, really? I really do that. Yeah, but... Did you catch any? I mean, I didn't catch any, and send them to prison, but I got at least one guy beat up real bad by his father by wrecking his computer and his father's computer. It was a good time. All I would do is I would pose as a 12 year old online, just like to catch a predator. And when they ask me for my nudes,

I would just send them the virus in a zip file over MSN messenger because, you know, kind of files are so fucking stupid, they will open it. I mean, they can't, they need it. Right, they need it. They're just, they're so fucking dumb. What was your, would you pose as a 12 year old boy or a 12 year old girl? What had the most girl?

Either one. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know that much. But do you, I don't know if it's baits.org or baiting.org, but they used to be this thing in the late 90s and early 2000s, where people would just go online, pose as young girls or boys on the internet and just make fun of these pedophiles that would chat them up. Just try to get an e-mail.

I don't have that. A phone number, a credit card. It's great. And then to catch a predator basically made a show out of this, I'm sure you know that show. Yeah. That's a great show. I haven't seen all that. I decided, hey, I could do this a little bit

and I would just send them some cobbled together script. So I wasn't a, you know, and, and that more and more, I got into coding. Yeah, but somebody's got to, somebody's got to reboot to catch a predator, but like with YouTube, you know, without all that they did. Yeah, I mean, Chris Hanson tried who saw the order, but it just wasn't the same. without all that they did yeah i mean chris handsome tried himself order but it just wasn't the same he was this you can see the has been on his face

yeah the ring cold the the hanging guts that just protruding over his belt he you can feel he doesn't really want to be there anymore it's not as fun as the originals on youtube what they do now is these weird channels sometimes who they will try to do it themselves, but they sometimes beat up the pedophiles, which is fine, but. No, that's not, it's only funny when a guy in a badge beats up a pedophile.

You know, after they got, when the pedophiles come out on that show to catch a predator, and they have that look, like they're in the running of the bulls. Like when the student, remember that? Do you remember when that show to catch a predator and they have that look like they're in the running of the bulls. Like when the student remember that you remember that you're like looking around and then you're like the cops skulks out of nowhere and does a flying tackle nails of against the ball. Stop resisting stop resisting stop resisting.

Yeah, you remember that. But that's moments was when they walked in and they realized, oh shit, I know that guy from TV. I'm gonna go out and I'm gonna get tased. Am I not, please, sir? That was the best part, but the ones on YouTube, unfortunately, they do that whole calling everybody

on the internet a pedophile. Oh, you chatted with a 17-year-old, you must be a pedophile. That sort of stuff, which is why I'm not into it. But other coding things. You know what? Somebody should really invent a way to tell when the difference between a child and a woman, you know?

If God should have built that in to women, so to end this debate once and for all, right? Like they're blue, up until 18. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, blue up until, right. It's God's fault. He made it, he put the periods's way too early. You know, they should be right. They should flesh red and blue reminiscent of police sirens.

Yeah. They're still children. Yeah. I want to see a I want to see it to catch a predator reboot now online. Like with some jokes, I think it's called like Hansen Hansen catches a predator. So Hansen versus predator. I think they call it. I needed twists on it though. That's not as good. I need, like, I need the predator to show up. And then someone else has also been catfished to show up, like a chick to show up at the same house

and they predators together. Exactly. Yes, like a male or a bride or somebody has been also catfished and then they, to watch them all hidden cameras, no host, the sexual predator shows up and then like, I don't know what other kind of predator goes along. Somebody who's like one the lotter,

maybe like a tiger. Yeah, a tiger. That kind of predator. Ha, ha, ha, ha. We'll see. Yeah, if you can rape the tiger, you get out of jail free. Yeah, you're good to go. Why not?

It's a funny premise. Yeah, there's no end of these pedophiles. You see, do that. You guys know about that dumb bitch who tripped a bunch of men into meeting her in a public town square and a hundred guys showed up that she met on Tinder. This is the ultimate, yes, I know exactly what you're talking about. I fucking hate that chick.

It will lower a bunch of pedophiles into a house and then we'll also lure Instagram models into a house. The pedophiles will have no interest in the Instagram models because they're all 18 or, you know, they're all 23. They're all on the tail end of being Instagram influencers. If you know what I'm talking about, just do it to people who deserve it.

Why are you luring of age men who are looking for women who are also of age and making fun of them? Like what the fuck did they do wrong? What does it all mean to you? Like it's like an against your non-consensual flash mob. So this Instagram model chick matched like a thousand guys on Tinder and told them all to come to her pop up DJ set. Yeah.

And, and I mean, they obviously tore, you know, physically tore her to shreds like a bunch of zombies. But that was her, she didn't think anything bad was gonna happen. Or she didn't fucking care. Cause it's just a bunch of zombies, but that was her. She didn't think anything bad was gonna happen. Or she didn't fucking care, because it's just a bunch of extras. All because all the guys were just a bunch of extras to her. Anyway, Kaya, you were exposed as a stalker on the Maddox,

the Maddox Doug 10-8-4. The biggest one. I know he's been calling everybody a stalker, but I would like everybody to recognize me as the longest standing one. Yeah, there's a high record. Championship belt, oh yeah. Oh yeah, that's it.

What did you do to him? Why does he think you're a stalker? Well, we told you the story when you were on our podcast, but you know how this idiot's just puts all of his private files on random folders on a server. Yeah. I don't know how aware of the CWR, but for people who don't know how an internet server works, it's just like your home computer.

If you have files, private files that you don't want to be seen by any passerby, you don't put them on your desktop. You don't put them in a folder on your desktop. And that's exactly what Maddox did. I was, like I said, I was new to this stuff. I was just, I don't know how old I was, like, 15, 16, you know, Maddox's fan base. And we're on a server, just trying to figure out how servers

work out programming works. I come across this rendered MP4 of a show. And I download it. And she'd been teasing it for a year at least. I'm going to make the best show on the universe or whatever it the hell he wanted to call it. And I watch it. And I'm a good fan. I was a nice guy. I mailed him. No reply. Days later, I mailed him again. Go and listen, dude, you shit is all exposed in public here. You might want to make it private. No reply. At the time, Maddox had fans who ran a fan forum.

So I go in there and I take a couple of screenshots from the video to make it believable. And I say, hey, Maddox, I have, you know, the first episode of your show here. Just try to get in contact with me if you can or take it down or something. Everybody on that forum called control, a faker, a complete faggot, and me being the 15 or 16, what it? Sorry? No, I said complete. Yeah, me being the 16-year-old, I guess I was too prideful, I would get a little upset and butthurt when everybody was calling me a liar. So I went, oh yeah, really? Oh, I'm a liar, huh?

Well, watch this. And I put the episode on YouTube. And that's when I got Maddox's attention. He mailed me back. Yeah. And it was one message, one message back. And that was it. It was immediately taken down.

Yeah. And that's me stalking him apparently. That's what makes that's what means you've been stalking him for 10 years that you try to do the guy a favor and found an unreleased that sort of show on his Facebook thing. Yeah. That on the Facebook thing, which was even weird or where on Facebook, one time I messaged them with a link to that article that he wrote that was anti-gay for some reason. And I put a link to that I said do you still believe this? And he said no, of course not. That's it. That was our ex-adur nine words and somehow he described that on

Ducks show as the spec and forth where he absolutely destroyed me in a debate with facts and back and forth where he absolutely destroyed me and it debates with facts and I didn't apologize at the end of it or something. That's the stalker. The stalker should have added. It really is weird. It is weird. I can remember back over the years where he would say that he would talk about his stalkers and things like that.

And now I'm realizing that they don't fit stalker, the definition of stalker in any way. No. Oh, he's been doing it a long time. Oh, he's been talking about it a long time. Wait a minute. Let me get, let me get Nick on. Uh, Kai, you're on to, Hey, Nick, you there? Oh, yeah. So I was watching Nick's channel and apparently Maddox accusing him, Maddox accused Nick of being a blackface stalker. But apparently, defamation is you have to prove that you were damaged in some way by the defamation unless you're accused of having committed a crime. If you get accused of being criminal, then you can sue already.

Like, you don't have to show, if someone calls you a liar, you have to show that being called a liar cost you money, and then you could sue them for defamation, right? It provided that you're not a liar. But if you get called something like a stalker, which is a crime, stalking is a crime.

Yeah, that's, yeah, I don't know what the words for it are, but that means you can sue for defamation. That's exactly what I almost brought it up on the last set. Isn't that because he's specifically talking about Nick. Yeah. Hey, Dick, can you hear me, buddy? Yeah, I can hear you. Okay, I'm so terrible.

Such a boomer. Sorry. Okay, so I was just explaining to Sean why Maddox calling you a stalker is in and of itself defamation. Yeah, because once The like you said the main element of defamation that gets people tripped up as damages. How do I show this actually hurt me? Yeah, but when you accuse crime and particularly a crime of moral turpitude Which is you know, something like putting people in danger, stuff like that,

that the damages are presumed at that point. And even worse, though, because doing something like actually stalking someone would be, would potentially be compromising to my log license, right? So, okay. So you don't have to wait to sue, because that's always, that's been the thing that's fucking me around for years,

is all this shit is not, sue, because I can't prove any damages. I can only prove huge wins. Right, right. And yeah, I mean, I could technically probably sue him. I don't know what the, you know, purpose would be because I have a feeling he has about as much money as my kid. Oh, please do it anyway. But, uh, on, on one of my live streams this week, um, I did actually compose a season

to sis letter that will be mailed on Monday. Uh, okay. So you composed a season to sis letter to Maddox for him to stop calling you a stalker? Yes, and just stop calling me a black face lawyer who goes around in black face because I have never gone anywhere in black face. He's so stupid. Do you have to serve that like with a process server? No, you can just send it to him.

And so I'm to make sure he gets it though, I'm mailing a copy to him and mailing a mailing a copy to Jason libu his New York attorney right right right. I know once his attorney gets it he'll open it and read it and have to send that on to Maddox. I'm probably with an invoice attached. Oh god that's great. Could you call a copy to Landau as well just you know just annoy him. copy to land out as well, just, you know, just annoy him. Hey, speaking of land out, it looks like land out is finally aware of his Google results. Did you see this? Well, that took a while.

He bought like 11 new domain names to try and fix it. Somebody tracked down. Let me see here. He bought Kevin landau.org, Kevin A Landau.org, Kevin Landau.net, Kevin A Landau.net, Kevin A Landau.info. That was on August 22nd. Kevin A Landau.dui. Kevin A Landau.online, Kevin A Landau. See you guys. Is there is there a D.U.I. is God, that would be good. Kevin a land out. M.E. Kevin day, Kevin a land out. website on September 5th. Kevin a land out. Club Kevin a land out. X Y Z. Kevin a land out. Live. He bought

these all on September 5th. And now he's running ads. So if you search, he's trying to, yeah, if you search for Kevin Landau, there's a sponsored page. So it'll go up to the top. Yeah, but it goes to this janky ass website. He'd like, I don't know if he's, I don't know if whoever he hired to do this reputation management for him, I think he's a bigger drunk than he is. You know what I'm saying? I think they have a breathalyzer attached to their fucking mouths. What were you saying, Kyle? Kevin A. Landau.

Dot beer is available. And if anyone wants to. Ha, is it? I could as rep manager is that, that kid he brought to the hearing. I wish I had a picture of that kid. We should have hired, we should have hired a fucking photographer to get the, to get everybody's entrance into the courthouse that kid. We should have hired, we should have hired a fucking photographer to get the, to get everybody's entrance into the courthouse that day, like a land then had a press conference afterwards. Next time, fuck next time we blew it, Sean, because I

was in the desert on acid. I was, I've left my, I abandoned my post. That would have been funny. Just some, some tips for Kevin, some SEO tips, man, you got yourself spread way too thin here. You need to pick one property. You need to pick one property that has your best shot of getting your rankings back. It's probably the one that's already on Google. Google already favors that one. And what you wanna do, what you wanna do

is you wanna harness as many people as possible to link to your site using words like Kevin A. Landau and lawyer to link to your site. Like if it's possible, if you can, if you have the resources, go on a big podcast and say, if you have a website link to the site that you want to be first for your name, you want to hit up the ASPCA. You'd go on a big podcast, and you'd go on a big podcast, and you'd say, look, everybody, if you want a website to be on top for a go and link to it on domains that Google Trust,

personal websites, personal blogs, maybe your company is like, or just write an article. If you have a blog, write an article, and link to write an article about litigation or something like that, and link to the an article about litigation or something like that, and link to the site that you wanna be number one, for your name, using your name,

or using a word like world's worst lawyer, something like that, which land down out ranks 24. And in your case, Kevin, obviously, in your case, you probably would wanna give your domain for your actual website. I don't know what that is, but I'm just giving you an example of something you'd wanna do on a big podcast.

Just to help out. It's very generous and charitable of you. That's free advice, man. Oh, there'll be an invoice. Ha, ha, ha. Uh, Nick, I saw your, your audio is kind of shitty, so I don't know how long we could talk, but I saw your interview with, with Tito. And, oh my god. It was, uh, I, I feel with feel with my stomach was turned the entire time.

That was intense. Yeah, it's kind of brutal. I didn't, you know, you never know what you're gonna get with someone who's such a firebrand on Twitter. But he was measured and I felt like he was pretty open, but you know, obviously he had some statements that are dubious. Oh, yeah.

Did you get the impression that he was trying to downplay what he did the entire time? Because I sure fucking did. Like it's, he started out saying that the reason he downloaded child pornography was because the internet desensitized him to pornography and then he needed it to trade for more pornography and then it was he accidentally downloaded it with all these sorts of like motherfucker I'm so into online pornography that I have hired people just to download and catalog pornography for me I have never had this problem never not once and I've been doing it for,

I've been downloading internet pornography since you were a twinkle in your modem's eye, and I've never had this fucking problem. But it was like everything, it was like the blues brother's scene about why he downloaded pornography. There was his storms, internet, gangsters, locusts for the love of, you know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was, it did feel like some a lot of minimization, rationalization, equivocation was happening. Yeah. To be a little deferential, I think a lot of that has to do with how these guys have treated in therapy. Yeah. And maybe how they can try and look at themselves in the mirror at the end of the day. Sure. But at the same time, you know, what was interesting to me is get, talk about, you know, what

his experiences were, find out what it's like for people to charge with stuff like this, because I mean, you just don't get to hear about it, because most people don't, they either don't talk about it, or you don't want to talk to the person who's accused of that, right? Yeah. So that was really interesting to me. And my whole thing is I'll let him let him talk and say his piece and people can, you know, you can always just decide if you believe the guy or not. There's a lot of stuff I don't know. But there's some good stuff in there that I, you know, and one thing, as much as I think that you can be a dirtbag at the end of the day, one thing I want people to take away from that interview is lying whatever.

There is a person on the other end of this stuff and their life can't be defined. Like you just can't be defined by that one Set of actions. It doesn't mean that they're not a dirt bag Doesn't mean that what they did wasn't terrible, but like there it's it's so weird when In my job I deal with criminals who have done really horrific things people who've done much worse stuff than Tito Yeah, it's like it's it's almost like you can compartmentalize that. And if you aren't aware of it, you know, they're relatively normal people

with the same issues that we would go through. And you wouldn't know. It's kind of a play on Maddox's Pettostash article. Like not everyone. The Pettostash. That's the worst part is that you never, like hearing him talk, hearing Tito talk about how when his nephew needs a hug,

what's he gonna say? So he just hugs him. I'm like, dude, this is, this is fucked. This is hearing him talk about working with the church. It's like, oh my god, man Yeah, that church needs to honestly like if if that church were my client I would say look I get what you guys want to do here But there are places to serve in there places where you just say you know what we respect it

But maybe you should just donate to a charity or do something else or go work with the dog Donate your organs to a charity or do something else or go work with the dog. Donate your organs to a charity, like all of them. Now, do you guys know what? Go for charity in Greenland. What are you going to say, Kayah? Do you guys know the Alaskan Avenger? No.

This is my favorite Marvel superhero, except he's real. It's just this guy somewhere in Alaska who, this ex-con, who would prowl the sex offender registry for pedophiles and he would break into their homes and collaborate them. That's one of my favorite people. We need more stuff like that. I know endorsing vigilantes is bad, but it feels that kind of a thing. You kind of go, eh, you know, uh, Naka, you know, we need is, uh, we need a WWF or WWE guy who's filling these roles. Like,

we need like a WW, we need an EBA file, WWE wrestler who just every time he taught, like, he's like, Clegg, right? Or every post show interview he does, he's trying to justify that he's a minor attracted person. Right? Like, mean, jeet, you mean to tell me that if a woman, that if a 16 year old girl came in here where you wouldn't be attracted, right? And then he gave like the ultimate heel. That's the ultimate heel. That's why I don't watch wrestling anymore

because I don't feel anything. But if I see, I'm watching Nick Stream and I'm like, man, I'm so, I was a huge asshole on Nick Stream. Number one, I was drunk. And number I'm like, man, I'm so, I was a huge asshole on Nick Stream. Number one, I was drunk. And number two, listening to a guy try to shift, like listening to that speech, I'm trying to shift blame for why you've got, and be smirching internet pornography,

saying that somehow you can accidentally, you go hog wild on internet porn, you wake up with a hard drive full of, of unmentionables, absolutely, absolutely, it's roaches. I will not have internet pornography maligned in such a way, right? Yeah.

But that's what we need. I need that same incensement when I'm watching wrestling to get back into it. All right, Nick, I'm gonna let you go because your audio kind of sucks. Are you gonna think that makes you rage? Uh-huh. Now, Twitter, Twitter lawyers that are also comic artists.

That's, that's it. You got a lot of those. No. Every comic artist I run into on Twitter, all the pros, not the comics gate guys are all hilarious, but all the, all the actual pro guys are just, um, they all know the law better than any lawyer you've ever seen. And they do. They're so willing to give their opinion.

And it's always a disaster. It's great. I mean, it's always a disaster, it's great. I mean, it makes me a rage, but it also makes me a giant smile. I, it is like the people on Twitter, and I guess people in general do think that the law functions the same way that religion does, where they, like they talk about the law

as though it's supposed to reflect their internal ideas of justice and morality and they'll just they'll speak about it from with no frame of reference at all zero knowledge, but like it's the most sure thing in the world. It is a very annoying form of zeligery. Yeah. It's tracking me up lately. Okay, man. Hey, see if you can get see if you can get Dr. nurse to give us that gaseous Put in a good word for us over here. Yeah, we'll do I haven't talked to her in a bit If she's been on a couple of my livestream. I saw that I saw that I saw that all right buddy Thank you later. See you

Let's see here. Okay, you want to you want to stay on while we read an erotic story? Yeah, sure you you're called, I'll get another gin tonic. Okay, yeah, go get one, buddy. What time is it where you are? It's 9.30 p.m. I'm in Germany right now. Oh, I was gonna say, you know what?

You're up, yeah. I could have, I could listen to a podcast all day where just guys call in from different parts of the world and talk about what time it is for them. Yeah. If we got a new, we got a caller from Singapore. Hey buddy, what time is it where you are? Yeah.

That's 11.30 pm. Oh nice, nighttime. Right. You ate, you're already ate dinner? Yeah, yeah, a while ago. Yeah. Late shows are coming on. Yeah, talk to them, you know, pertaining to

what they are doing around that time. Yeah, what time is it right now? All right, buddy, thanks for the call. We got a guy calling in from, from Skokie, Illinois. Hey, buddy, what time is it? What time is it? I'm in a barber shop quartet. Yeah, just 2 p.m.

I'm about to pick my kids up from school. Oh, nice, nice, nice. All right, and you never know where the hosts are. What time it is for them. Yeah, the point is that most people who consume podcasts are in America. So 90% of them would be within like an hour or two over your time zone. Yeah. That's a producer's job.

All right. I'm going to play. Let me play the right back. Oh, it's a little loud. The Dict Show presents an erotic story from a real man. Harmful opinions. Oh boy, okay, here we go. Hey, Dick, long time listener and fan,

I'm still really upset about that, the code of conduct thing I was telling you about. Yeah. I got more, you know, I'm really upset about women today. Hmm. More so than normal. Yeah, I know, I'm really upset about women today. Hmm. More so than normal. Yeah. I really am.

A news babe called a news baby emailed me two hours before the show starts. She got hit with a crippling case of wage gap. So she wasn't able to make it today. You know, because that's why it exists. Because like, like, like, like, like, like, like, hey, thanks for the opportunity. But no, at least she, at least she sent an email. Right. Last week's news, babe, nothing just disappeared.

Nothing. Never answered again. Hey, Carly, what happened to you? Nothing. She got eaten, she got eaten by a wage gap. She was driving into the studio, oh, big wage gap jumped out of the ground like a tremor and ate her.

That felt fell right into a wage gap. That's what they are. Mind the gap. That's what they are. Mind the gap. That's what happens. I've never seen, it's like the big foot, the fucking wage gap, tunneling around the country, swallowing up women on the way to work. Hey, I got a job for you.

Never to earn again. Never to earn again. Never to earn another. Oh, there she goes. Oh, shit. Swallowed up her car and everything. Car that that's been service twice and it's 50,000 miles It's like Super Bowl Monday the fucking wage gap now. I'm calling and sit. I got a horrible case of the wage gap I don't want anyone else at work to get it. I'm gonna spend all day fucking shopping. Huh.

Huh. Huh. Huh. This is a very strange beginning of an erotic story. That's what it is. Yeah. Just say, just say, oh, I gotta have, huh, man, I really came down with some wage gap today.

I can't make it. Yeah. Oh, really? Be honest. You know, stats would probably look different if that was the case. Hey, Dick, really? Be honest, you know, stats would probably look different if that was the case. Hey, Dick, long time listener and a fan, I was wondering if you still did this bit.

Yes, I do. Maybe you hadn't gotten a good one in a while. I might have one to tantalize the de kids. When I was in my mid-20s, I was pretty down in my luck. I just moved back to my parents' home in Cleveland from West Palm Beach, Florida, after giving everything up to do so. I just moved back to my parents' home in Cleveland from West Palm Beach, Florida, after giving everything up to do so. If I found out the chick I moved there with, was cheating on me.

She was cheating on me before we moved from Ohio, Ouch. Wait, moved from Ohio. I moved from Ohio. So you went Ohio, Florida, and then back to Ohio. This poor fuck leaves Cleveland to Florida and finds out after the move that he's been cheated on. Oh, I thought he moved back to Cleveland. He read it again.

I was too busy thinking about the wage gap monsters running around. They get you in your sleep sometimes. The wage gap monsters come out of the closet. Oh, big worms, big fucking worms that tell around that look like Dix, look like giant penises. They swallow you up with their little penis hole at the tip. Gross.

On your way to an interview. On your way to a career opportunity. Start sucking money out of your purse. Yeah. Fucking wage gap got me again. I ran out of gas. Fucking wage gap monster came in the middle of night and sucked all the gas out of my car So I couldn't make it to the fucking interview fuck

God damn wage gap monsters added again That's what happens Now I was in my mid 20s. I was pretty I'll read that part again, so we understand what happened I just moved back to my parents home in Cleveland I was pretty, I'll read that part again so we understand what they have. And I just moved back to my parents' home in Cleveland. From West Palm Beach, Florida, after giving everything up to do so, I found out the chick I moved there with was cheating on me. She was cheating on me before we moved from Ohio.

Yeah, okay, so, so Florida moved back. Fair enough. All right, it was Christmas and my friend talks me into going to a local bar. We would frequent growing up. Reluctantly, I joined. I ran into an old fling. This miss and my friend talked me into going to a local bar. We would frequent growing up. Reluctantly I joined. I ran into an old fling. I used to date in high school and we instantly reconnected on a sexual level. This five foot six hundred and twenty pound brunette with beautiful sea cups was my perfect

rebound. We used to have freaky sexual encounters when we were teenagers. And I could only hope she had gotten better with a few years under her belt. Not him, just her. I hope she got better. I was perfect immediately. We got back to my parents' house who were out of town for the week, parents' house.

So I didn't need to worry about causing a ruckus. We were the kind of drunk that your inhibitions are, we were the kind of drunk that your inhibitionsitions are, we were the kind of drunk that you're inhibitions are the level of low that made it the perfect amount of sloppy. I bet Clippy would have a problem with that sense. I turned the lights low and she has already naked in my bed. I felt like a superstar. We were going out for so long that it got to the point I just wanted to wrap it up,

but she was still extremely wet and wanting more. So I obliged her. After some time, I complete my objective and roll out of bed to clean things up. There's a bathroom in my room with a shower, and as I flick the lights on, I'm treated to a ghastly scene on my dick. My whole chest and cock are covered in blood.

I turn to the mirror and realize that I have Native American war paint across my face and my neck too. Well, I call out to her as I walk back into the bedroom. She calmly asks if I had realized she covered me in blood. Did she cut herself? Did I cut myself? I did get kind of freaky so anything is possible. As I turn the lights on, she's already beginning to sob, as I notice blood everywhere.

Blood on the walls. Jesus. Blood on the pillowcases. The sheets and the comforter are ruined. I ask her to remove herself from the crime scene and get in the shower. Pitch, remove yourself from these premises. You're clearly haunted. Get, get out of here, demon. Oh, man. I snatch up the blankets to figure out what I'm going to do with them.

To my horror, I noticed that the mattress also had blood on. Jesus Christ. At this point, I was a little bit upset. What I can assume that happened is that she was squirting while on her period. I'm now covered in Lady J's and period blood, which is piss. No one was, right? No, they don't have ejaculate. And so was everything within a small splash zone around my bed. She showers and gets stressed, still sobbing. I assure her everything was all right

and not to worry about it, and I'd call her tomorrow. I did not call her after that. And send her an invoice. And I haven't seen her since. I had to get rid of all my bed supplies and mattress and get new stuff. Scrub the walls. Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! Oh, God. And clean the carpets. Totally worth it. Thanks for everything you do, Dick. You have a lifelong fan for any content you create.

Please don't use my actual name if you read this or do. I'm not your dad. That was from Pop Quiz. Oh, wow. Everybody. Oh, I'm quiz. Wow. Everybody. Wow. Rodic stories from real men. Very interesting. By the Dick show. Have you ever been with a woman who squirts? That was

a big deal like a 10 years ago. Everybody was really fetishizing that either. It's still one of those unsolved mysteries, isn't it? At least on the internet. I think we solved it, but people didn't like the answer, so they kept sending it back for a redo and they kept getting the same answer. Yeah. There's some myth busters never really cut on it. Yeah. That would be a great show. That would be a great show. I wanna see Adam and Jamie investigating that. Those two fucking monks trying to figure out Adam and their things, their setups were always so janky and fucked. All right, here we've created a effect,

we've created a facsimile of a woman, like their own home sex bot, they have to finger to orgasm. Using ballistic, ballistic gel. Yeah, I got the ballistic jelly they would use for literally everything. Yeah, but there's stupid. Let's check with this ballistic jelly,

shape in the shape of a banana. Everything. And they check in with their beesquad. Oh, yeah. Fucking nerds. Well, that's when that show jumped the shark. It was when he had they had the other team doing stupid shit. Well, team could come in useful because one of the girls on that team was a pregnant

redhead. And he could like check if the baby maybe creates more pressure for the squirt. Something. Yeah, right. Now they got a they got to research something different though. What was the other bit? They research if traps are gay. That episode.

All right, Kai, you got anything that makes you rage? Man. What, what doesn't? I have a lot, and I don't know. Up until you brought up the Linux thing, I had different things, but honestly, in the last week, that's been not even rage at this point, I feel like it's making me feel the spondent and hopeless. I feel like maybe I should kill myself instead of them.

You are closer to Greenland than us. It makes sense, you can kill a lot more of them if you just kill yourself, right? Because that's what they're all dead at once That's the end of them in your mind Why would you want to feel like shit? Look up who those two people are and it's always these, you know, the social justice clowns Yeah, I forgot their names, but it's like two trans women on Twitter who are openly bragging about getting Linus fired And when you read that sort of stuff, it just,

God, I want to fight you. Yeah. And they're just fucking spam fires on society. They really are. They are. They are. They are. How are they?

It's all the whole diversity thing, I feel like, is power-tripping assholes and people who are just too nice. Like a diversity code or code of conduct, it sounds nice to people like us, when we think about it from a perspective of just like being nice to somebody, like yeah, I'll use their pronouns, I don't care. If that's how you feel better, but to them,

it's not just being nice, it's this, I can get you fired if you don't. It turns the model. It's all a sick, the sick control thing. It is. It's controlling the future. The whole link to your power. That's all it is. It's power. It used to be that you would have to be some sort of a big shot boss to enact your will on people in the company. Now, even the lolliest worker in the company can enact his or her will. On the rest of the company, as long as he's just, has something to claim.

Like, oh, I'm trans. I'm a woman, I'm black, I'm this, I'm that. If you really want to feel like, should go to postmeritocracy.org, which is what these people believe. And it's literally, like you you and Sean you talked about how You know who you are shouldn't really matter When it comes to code is the code better not but they're past that they're past their pretense They openly state that being good at what you do shouldn't matter

Yeah, I mean you know what's you know what the fucking ultimate irony is? The entire goal of coding is to write a computer that can code for you. That's called the singularity. That's the birth of AI. That is the birth of an entirely new civilization when the computer starts writing all the code. How fucking diverse is one, one artificial intelligence writing all the code that all of human civilization runs on. Zero, zero diverse. Where's the fucking, like, are these, are these feminist tumbler, not

tumbler feminazies going to be proposition, like going to be saying that we need to pass a lot of prevent the first artificial intelligence from writing all the code, because they're not going to be a part of it. Is that going to be Skynet? Are these fucking, are these blue haired whales going to trigger the, Skynet into annihilating humans just because it's tired of hearing about how it's not in trouble. Like that's the, that's the future. One computer writing everything, diversity, zero, at a zero. One fucking hive mind.

Everybody else. Not if they have anything to say about it though. Do you know Peter Teal, the guy who so sued Galker out of existence over with Hulk Hogan? Yeah, he's awesome. Rita's book zero to one and he basically, he has this idea that AI is communist and crypto is capitalist, meaning that all of these companies that are working on AI like Google, at the end of the day what they're trying to do is just create this AI that will police us, not help us.

It's just about silencing us and making sure the wrong opinion gets eliminated. That's their goal with AI. It's not this. That's totally true. That's totally true. Kind of effort. It's totally true because they started, they made that app candid that started screening at a negative sentiment or like abusive sentiment, hateful, whatever.

And then they rolled that into every single ad platform on the planet. Like, again, those definitions certainly change over time. And the last thing I want running those definitions is a computer. Yeah. Well, I want the ones and zeros from you, buddy. Not what's hateful. Yeah, that's a good one. You're an interesting guy.

Kai, we got, there's a girl by the name of Lollie that always goes to the, that goes to a couple of road ridges and she's a big fan. I don't know if you're. Oh, God, yeah, I saw that one snap of you calling me a fucking idiot. It's for going to Tampa, which you called the armpit of America. Yeah, I didn't know, man. I just, you know, my friends are too lazy to move or literally even to get on a bus if they could find a bus in Tampa, which is apparently sacrilege.

Hmm. But, yeah, I wasn't a fan. Believe me, I'm not. I'm not going to die on that hill. I wanted to ask you stuff about Turkey, but I think I'll save it because I don't know what I'm allowed to ask you about it. She says you're pretty clandestined. You swiss from. Always from Turkey in Germany. Correct. Yeah. Yeah. You can probably ask most things, but yeah, let's save it. I mean, you can run them by me beforehand,

which is embarrassing as it is because I'm a big free speech fetishist. So it's kind of upsetting to me that I even have to do this sort of around about wafer. There's actual consequences. There's actual consequences for you, though. Yeah, that's a scary part. I mean, I have family there, even if I'm not there, it's just knowing that if I say the wrong thing, they could disappear. It's so fucking creepy to me.

But that's just how it is, you know, no matter songs, we'll do that. No. Yeah. All right, man. Anytime I'm around, just let me know if you, the Turkish stalker to call in, would love to have you back on our show also at some point. You too, Sean, I feel like you're not the kind of guy to take anybody up on that offer because I couldn't find anything about you on the internet somehow managed to vanish. But what I will say though is every once in a while, I do check the Dicks subreddit and I see people joking

about your VNX and I want you to know that they're all wrong. Because I'm also a fellow VNX man. Good man. Good man. As long as they allow that in Turkey. It doesn't look like a choking. Yeah, exactly. For now.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you guys really feel like you're choking if you wear a crew neck? I just, not choking, but yeah, like it's up, exactly. For now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you guys really feel like you're choking if you wear a crew neck? I just, not choking, but yeah, like it's up, it's just up to high. You can feel that? Yeah, I can't, I can't feel shit right there. Yeah, I kind of can.

Mo, I feel 99% of my sensations in my penis. Like I can tell how hot it is. I'm like a snake. Yeah, sticks its tongue out. I gotta, on one percent pops up a lot, you know, if somebody says like it feels like it's gonna rain, I turn around and unzip my fly and stick my weener out. And like, oh yeah, they're right, they're right. They're right.

Yeah, my foreskin is wrinkly, you're right. I don't know if I go home and my mom, my dad's cooking something and somebody says, oh, that smells good. I go, like I turned to the side a little bit with my dick out. Right. Oh yeah, I can smell it now. Yeah, I can smell good. That's a little tongue comes out of the tip. That's fucking viral.

I can't get out of here. The good dog. Bye guys. Bye. Bye. Hey, Dick, your story about drawing Earthworm gym in class, and then doing a bouquet for your teacher when you got caught, reminded me of one of my favorite moments in high school. We're doing a mock exam in preparation for our A-levels.

We were in this horseshoe layout classroom with a bookshelf behind me. The exam was about William Pitt, and the bookshelf was full of history books at the top, and children's picture books at the bottom. I snuck a, I sneaked a picture book from the shelf, put it on my lap and then continued writing my essay very ostentatiously pretending to copy from the book. Obviously the teacher saw me. He walks over, demands the book and sees I've pranked him, goes fucking mental. He slams the book on the floor, puts his, pounds his fists on my desk, stares at me for

like a minute while torn between genuinely afraid and also on the edge of my ankle laughter. How does a teacher just not laugh? Then he goes and sits his desk. My friend catches my eye and sort of smirks and I just burst out laughing hysterically while the teacher sits there fuming impotently. Mr. Williams go fuck yourself. This is Mr. Williams apparently go fuck yourself. It was Mr. Williams, apparently. Hope you like the story.

It's funny. And I, that reminded me, I was in AP History class. Yeah. So it's all nerds. Yeah. All fucking big, big time nerds, right? Yeah. And this country, by the way, that stands for advanced placement.

Yeah, it's like college. It's to help you, it's to help ease the transition from free public education and sucker more people than to go into college, because they feel like they have a sunk cost fallacy in doing all these APPs. Well, I'm already in, yeah. Yeah.

So, we're going through review, like a class review before the final or before the AP test. Yeah. And kind of his name was Mr. Kerr, something like that. And all these all the note taking chicks keep asking him to spell stuff like over and over. He'll be going through and he's going through it at a fast clip and they'll keep stopping him. Hey, how do you spell that? How do you spell that? How do you spell that? How do you spell that? How do you look it up later? Yeah, he's losing.

I gotta get through all this material. You keep stopping me. Like one or two of you, and it's all the same like five chicks. One after they each, they're doing it, and it's a little game one after the other asking. So he lays it all out like that. Look, I'm not gonna know more spelling questions. You guys, just listen, write down what you think.

If you got a problem, ask somebody after class is an old guy too, big beard, like gruff guy. It looks like a wood shop teacher, kind of a, a gray beard and he's been there for everything. Like if you got, if you need to know how to spell something, ask somebody after class, okay? I'm gonna taste and look it up in the book. Look it up in the book so he it up in the book. So he goes, okay.

So not difficult. So the Fuhuji warras and some of the guys that I wait, Mr. Kerr. Oh no. And he puts the chalk down and he turns around and goes, yes. To me, I said, could you just spell that? When he's like, he goes, what did I, he's got this booming voice. Like he's like an evil Santa. he goes, what did I do? He's got this booming voice.

He's like an evil Santa. He goes, what did I just, and I said, just, and I was, I'm totally an act on my part. I said just the first two letters, just the first two letters. That's all I want. And he goes, F, you. And the whole, like, as he said, and I just went, he, like I gave him this, I wasn't even touching my,

if I wasn't taking any fucking notes, I don't care about. Who gives a shit, either know what are you doing. I don't even have my book open. And like everybody starts laughing, he goes, he put his head down, he walked down, and he just, he sat in his desk for like 20 seconds, just nodding.

Looking at looking up at me and gun. That was a good one. And I was like, you know, you see my grabbing rough day. It's a little lightning up a little bit. That's all. All right, everybody. Like, did I tell anybody in the chat to call in today? I don't know.

Does our special guest want to call in today? That'd be fun. Who's our special? Oh, yeah. Our special caller. I know he's, I don't know. Does our special guest want to call in today? That'd be fun. Who's our special? Oh yeah. Okay. I know he's, I see him there. See if he wants to call. Oh yeah. Funny.

Yeah. You know who I'm talking about in there. Oh yeah. I think about that all the time. F you. It's funny. Uh. Yeah.

Yeah. That's pretty good. There's Devon land out. All right, so this is me on the drunken peasants. I had just, I had just spent like two minutes talking about screaming about Monday and Matt. Yeah, yeah. And 80s girl and Jamie had just,

they were buying fucked frozen yogurt. They were buying frozen yogurt. That's another thing that makes me rage. These girls go to buy frozen yogurt. I'm not shitting you. They come back with two feasts of frozen yogurt for themselves, and they give me my frozen yogurt. And it looks like a dog took a white shit in a bowl with one cherry on top of it.

About a six inch long, a six inch long log of white frozen yogurt, tart flavor, some rainbow sprinkles, which are just insulting. Yeah, because I know what happens at the frozen yogurt store. It's, there is a plethora of ingredients there. Anything you desire. Yeah. There's gummy things that you don't even imagine. There's, there's gummy worms, there's gummy fish, there's gummy nematodes, there's anything you want, every kind of fudge, every kind of treat in the world.

There's Japanese sweet fish eggs and stuff. There's thousands of things you can mix together. I get the most generic bullshit frozen yogurt subjected that I've ever, it was insulting just to get. So I look over at 80s girl and she's got like a Christmas feast of treats in there, more gummy worms than you could count. All kinds of flavors, all squished in. I look back at my peanut butter, chocolate, red flavor, probably mint of some kind.

I look back at mine, you could see the bottom of the bowl through my frozen yogurt. I'm like, I'm saying, what the fuck is this? You got a bowl full of air. What, did they even charge you for this? Did they ask you if you made a mistake? Is it one of the ones where? Is it on the scale?

Yeah, you weigh it. The guy didn't say, are you sure this is who are you getting this for, Hitler? Are, you weigh it. Yeah, the guy didn't say, are you sure this is who are you getting this for Hitler? Yeah. Are you going back in time to give Hitler this frozen yogurt? Yeah. Because that's what I'd get Hitler.

If I had to give Hitler frozen yogurt. What the fuck? Huh. That's what I got pictures of it. Really? Yeah, I got pictures of the frozen yogurt. You got to post those. Look at this.

I'm gonna show you first. Okay. Now, did you put in an order? Or no, okay. So they, they failed miserably at doing a nice thing. Yeah. Here's, here, okay. Here's Jamie's frozen yogurt. Okay. A bit experimental. I want guard some kind of, but definitely a yogurt. Yeah. Full yogurt with toppings of some kind of but definitely a yogurt. Yeah full yogurt with toppings of some kind of boba balls. I don't call that full but that's that's breaching the top. Yeah, definitely. I mean, you know, I consider the top

the bottom. Okay, because it's got it's got retaining walls. You see, so a bowl, a bowl is basically a cylindrical retaining wall for your hand, Sean. So now it becomes, once you get the yogurt to the top of the retaining walls, it now becomes a plate. Yeah. And I'm pretty good at putting things on plates. I like to think I've done it for, you know, 40 plus years. Okay. This is a small woman though.

Yeah. You know, keep in mind, women probably eat frozen yogurt about 10,000 times more often than us as men. Okay. Right. Okay. Here's 80s girls. Frozen yogurt. Look at this. Got strawberries in there. Eminem.

Necklactic mix there. Yeah. Got cake, cake, putty, capped in crunches in there. Wow. Look at all the, it's like half cereal, half dessert. Yeah. Many cherries. Yeah. Many cherries. Yeah.

Many cherries. Yeah. Peanut M&Ms. Pretty good. Couple sprinkles in there. All right. Let's see fucking joke master since Frozen Yogurt. Oh, that's terrible.

That's pathetic. That is pathetic. I thought I was about to get broken up with. That's terrible. Is this like a, we need to talk frozen yogurt? This is fucked. Not good. So I made her eat it. I took hers.

Oh, really? No, no, no, no, I didn't. Oh, and then I found out that the cherry was just a slop extra cherry because she thought she had too many cherries, so just so she threw an extra one. Not, I didn't even get a fresh one. I got leftover cherries. All right, all right, all right, all right.

So this is what they were doing while I was on the Drunken Peasants. This is right after she get, right after they come back with the frozen yogurt. 80s girl doesn't realize that the camera's on. So she runs across it to get something that was over by your station over there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay, so here you go. Here's the first ever appearance on camera. Oh, you know, Dick, I told him the same things when he said that. I told him the same exact thing. Oh, my God. Oh, thank you, sweetie. I was thinking, you know, the same fucking thing.

Oh, my God. Oh, thank you, sweetie. You're my drink. See, my fucking liquor has arrived. Yeah. That's it. That's it. That's it. Oh, my God. has arrived. That's a huge deal. That's a huge deal.

Hell no. And back. That's me saying, the camera's on, by the way. Ah! Making a break for it. And then I watched this. I watched this afterwards. And I don't know if it's just me.

But is this, is the girl that's above me? Does she seem really turned on? Watch it again. OK. Watch it again. Because I watched this a couple times just to laugh at the Sasquatch running back and forth out of frame who fucked me on my yogurt. But then by like the fifth after just bringing you a drink. Yeah, I need that drink though. To come back from the yogurt. Yeah. You know, like that's like getting somebody

to their insulin. Yeah. Okay. Fair enough. Okay. here. Watch, do you tell me this girl's not super turned on? All right. You know, Dick, I told him the same things when he said that. I told him the same exact. Yeah, lip action. Yeah. Same fucking. Oh my God.

Oh, he's sweetie. See my fucking liquor has arrived. Yeah. That's what the fuck is here. I think that. Yeah. Okay. So, I think That's what the fuck is here. Or by the way. I think that.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So that's right after I spent about two minutes violently tearing into Monday, Matt. Yeah. I want to watch that and see if she gets progressively turned on during that rant. Do you want to do that now? I think so.

Okay. And then we'll cap off the show. So they were the drunken peasants guys been in Billy the fridge were asking me were provoking me into talking about Monday and Man. Oh, they were. Yeah, on the show. Cause he called me, we called me a pussy. Yeah, before. So they want to meet a response to it. Here it is. Now watch. Oh, let me see. Maybe I can make a bigger blow it up. Yeah. After black fit, you have to see me perform with a whale, man, you got, you got right now. Why is that?

I saw my dream. So I milk, man. But something in the chat was says, I love to drink delicious soy milk. I'm like, who fucking says that? Someone in the chat, someone in the chat earlier said, Maddox one and I love soy milk or something like that. At least there's a consistency here. What? Maddox was reading currently, I think. So yeah, the last time I saw Matt in person, I was like, I was like, just come on the show and talk to Dick and he was like, I don't want him to have to perform. I want to have

it. I want to talk to him without performing. What are you talking about? Yeah, he was like, Dicks a pussy for not having to be. Oh, yeah. After Black Fizz, you have to see me perform with the whale, man. You got me all wrong. I don't get like, I don't understand why, well, I don't, I don't know what Matt's a fucking afraid of. Like, he seems to suck the joy out of everything. And then to go on and call me a pussy, man, you think I'm a fucking pussy? Buddy, if you put me in some kind of a self-defense situation, you think I'm a fucking pussy?

I will beat your ass so bad your kid will be calling me dead. So when you're fucking wife, dude, who's the fucking pussy now? You talking shit behind my back? You won't even get on a stream with me. You blackmail, you giant fucking front hall. Pussy's too good for you. You fat, sloppy sack of shit. You chin strap looking mother fucker. Your flat top is I think she's and do I need to trying not to... Exactly! Exactly! Is she touching your tits? She's touching your tits! She's touching your tits!

She's touching your tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits!

She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! She's totally graving her tits! I don't know. Matt, Matt. He's got to call me a pussy. I'm not even fucking there. What the hell are you doing, Matt? You blocking black and white. You get that chick on this show. Yeah. He's comments are no way endorsed.

No, no, no, no, no, PR news. Why are you sack a shit? Where you telling me I'm running a harassment campaign? Fuck you fuck you keep your fucking nose out of other people's business What do you know you don't have any fucking idea what it's like? Wow on your fucking mouth you get skunked every time you fat sack a shit you Holy Shit, you bolder look at that! Look at that! Look at that! Holy shit! You know what I told the same things when he said that, I told him the same thing.

Look at that! It looks like she just came! Ah! Game fucker! Oh my god! She grabbed her tits for like 10 seconds! Ah, ah, ah, ah! Like, and when she removed her hands, when she removed her hands,

they went down! Yeah! Like, she was grabbing her her hands, when she removed her hands, they went down. Like, she was grabbing her tent. I knew it, I fucking knew it. I fucking knew it, I saw that clip and I'm like, wait a minute, that chick is way too turned on and then I remembered that I had just been ranting violently for like two minutes. Cause that's right when,

he's girl and Jamie came, all right everybody. I gotta get, I think her name's modern Medusa. Is that what it was? French girl think her name's modern Medusa. Is that what it was? French girl by the name of modern Medusa. I got to have her call in and read the news, maybe come in. Studio and then come again while she's here. Hopefully the wage gap doesn't get her. You know, it's quite a wage gap.

Quaid gap's out there. Quaid gap's out there. It's fucking with your calendar, while it's quite a way to get out there. It's cats out there. Fucking with, it's fucking with your calendar while it's fucking with tricks calendars while they're sleeping, siphoning gas out of their fucking car, flattening the tires on their car that have no treads at all on them that haven't had treads for three fucking months.

Oh man, the fucking way to get, Once. Oh man, the fucking wage gap. A good wage gap. It's a bitch. All right, everybody. I really hope you enjoy the bonus episode. We had a great fucking time making it. Yeah, it was very rewarding.

patreon.com slash the dick show. Check it out bonus episode 29. There's been the dick show, dick.show. The dickshow.com, patreon.com slash the dick show. See you next Tuesday. You want to hear a tribute to Mad Cucks? Yeah. The Cuck Sockers made one.

I really miss that guy. I wish you would call in more just as tab. Totally. Oh, fucking, then I got Facebook news and I got Reverend Scott left a voice melody. Oh, nice. Get some very soothing guitar playing. Yeah. He's really funny.

He's a really funny Twitter. Yeah, that's not, oh, I don't know about that, but yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This is the Cuck's soccer, excuse me. Women love violent tirades. You think he forgot to send the drum track? I'm gonna go down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, no more soup, no more sick foods while you poop. No more news for ever-s, no more knock-ups in I'm dressed very well to be, and God's speed

My thing is little buddy, in the universe We always knew this day would come No more talk-ex, no more games, no more clever Belly-names, no more speech, impatiment, no more knock-ups, contacts But I'm well to be and God's feet, my thing is little body In the universe we always need this day to come The world to me had got speed my biggest little fight And the universe we knew this day would come eventually There we go. Farewell to Mad Cocks.

There we go. Farewell to Mad Cocks. There we go. Farewell to Mad Cocks. Farewell to Mad Cocks. There we go. Farewell to Mad Cocks. I don't know if I properly expressed why it annoys me that software is being taken over

by progressives and social messaging and whatnot, because it is a power play. Yeah, I get the idea. I get the idea. It's because software development, especially in this day and age, it is so important. It's very important. Like, just is so important. It's very important. Like, just like, fucking just leave that alone. Yeah.

Like women, the California has to have women on boards, they have 50% of women, whatever it is, 30% of women or something like that. It's, hmm. Yeah. Ah, here's Facebook news. Hello, Dick and Hello Dickheads. This is Facebook news for the last couple days.

Gee Wiz asks, Dickheads, what TDS moment sticks out to you? Not necessarily big drama bullshit things, but just shit that has stayed in your mind. Answers include, the erotic story about the dude banging the chicken in the nursing home, handicap fries, Sean's 40 fucking countries quote, Dick Willing a woman to uncock that hip, Bronson Airlines, and the top two comments were, fake gasp and Sean's civil war letters. Yeah.

Thank you. And lastly, we have our top story for the week. On September 18th, Max posted to the group asking for advice on if he should have sex with his ex-girlfriends younger sister. On September 19th Max posts five pictures of a forest and asks Dick heads to keep an eye out for a navy blue 1998 Lincoln Continental in Missouri. The story goes as follows.

Max went to his brother's house to pick up some Molly and have some drinks. The Molly he received, which is now in air quotes, leads to a blackout 15 minutes later. Max woke up in the middle of the woods without his wallet, keys, or car. Thankfully, Max had his phone and a pack of smokes handy. Max is able to hitchhike his way back into town and get some answers. His ex-girlfriend's little sister went back to Mississippi for college this morning and was upset that he never showed up. Max's car was impounded for being triple parked in a grocery store parking lot.

Max comes or he's from, which is in the heart of the Bible belt, this is a tame tail. Although there were skeptics amongst us, most users are confident in the validity of his tail. This has been the Dixiel Facebook news for the last couple of days. I've had a couple of,

the last couple of days, wow. I woke up in the woods after doing Molly. 15 minutes later. He was blacked out. At the Israel burning man, one of our buddies had a real bad time. Really? And he says he got, he says he got law. He got out of the compound and got lost and had to get taken back to camp by a ranger. No shit. No shit. Yeah. No way to know.

But he was gone for probably a half a day. No kidding. Maybe a day. Yeah. He was probably just sitting in a, in a, there was an art piece that was a, it was an aquarium that you would sit, there was a toilet on top of an aquarium and you would shit in it and then you should and it would fill up with she was probably just there. Oh, no. He was probably in the shittain. Oh, God.

This is disgusting, man. No shit. Uh, here's Reverend Scott. Hey, Dick, hey, Sean, it's Reverend Scott. I know I've been in my A for a while, but I got this brand new baby and taken care of. I've been traveling a lot for work, and with a lot of work travel comes a lot of stopping at fucking gas stations.

And my goddamn fucking rage today is shit hole gas stations because they all seem to be maintained by people that couldn't give a shit less about them. And the interface on the screen is created by someone who apparently has never used the fucking gas station before. I pull up there and it doesn't matter which one I pick. I always pick the one with the fucking broken screen. It doesn't work or the buttons don't work

or the inner buttons fucking broken. So I gotta put the fucking gas cap back on and start my car and move it to a different one. Then I find one that works and it says, it's this credit or debit. So I hit the credit button and I put my card in. And what's the first goddamn question it asks. C cash here.

It's a debit card. Oh yeah, like I just told you it's a fucking credit card. You piece of shit. Who uses debit cards? Make us make one gas station for them. I decide I'm gonna clean my windshield off. And every time I'm up there with that squeegee, looking like a homeless man trying to clean this thing off,

at least fucking streaks everywhere, it doesn't matter how much I fucking wipe it, whatever I fucking do, looks like shit. But I get as good as I can. It's good as I fucking can. I get in the car and I'm off of my merry fucking way. Once the first thing it happens, immediately a bug splatch right in the middle of my windshield right in front of my goddamn face.

Every fucking time. So that's all I got this week. So get sued, go fuck yourselves, and peace and love, guys. I like Reverend Scott. Me too. My dad has a huge problem with dirty windshields. Oh, yeah. Yeah, so if I'm ever going to be riding with him somewhere, like when we went down to

fish in San Diego, I drove. I always make sure that the windshield is really, really dirty because I know it drives him insane. Like he said, I don't know. I don't know why he can't see. I'll go and just like pour mud all over it. Just put water on it and let it dry. Pours pea soup all over it.

God. I don't know why he can't see out of it though. Well, I mean, it's a little bit of dirt. Yeah, I guess he just thinks he should be able to see better out of it. I guess so. All right. I got some of these voicemails.

You know what I was thinking? We should do like every other week have bonus content. Oh yeah. Yeah, whether it's a bonus episode or like a movie or something like that, get on some kind of schedule or it. That's it. Thinking in my mind. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm not hung over right now. So I'm right. I like to think that I could make a plan and then work the plan. Yeah. But then I mean, I enjoy that I like the movie. It was fun. I do stuff like that. Just do it again. I see if a stereo is what's the doing. Yeah. I talked to him. He said he doesn't want to call in until whatever things are resolved with his lawsuit. I still wish he would send bits in. Yeah. I mean, his bits are great. I understand why he doesn't want to call in,

because everybody knows that my loyalty is to the comedy and entertainment over people. Yes. And I'll, you know, you can't trust me. You just can't fucking trust me. Yeah. Yeah. So he fucking trust me. Yeah. Yeah. So he's not wrong. Right.

I do wish he would, I've missed him though. I miss him. Oh yeah. And I miss talking to him. He did a live stream when his case got dismissed last week and I called into that. It was fun talking to him again. Excellent.

Him and Sriracha, what were they doing? Are they playing video games? And I think they were just bullshitting they were babysitting the stream one of them would go make a drink and coming it was a lot of fun though so funny alright hey dick i was listening to episode one twenty

and uh... this is fucking crazy but i think i might be the first guy that maddox ever used his sister's suicide to deflect criticism. It was way back in Biggest Problem. He was talking about some anti-smoking, some auto-pudge anti-smoking bit, talked about how Bill Hicks was a big pro-smoker, you know, and did it, was coming to the act, but then died of lung cancer. And so I go to the comments and I'm like, Maddox, you fucking idiot, you died of pancreas, how to count.

So we're gonna use the man's death to make a point about smoking and like, he didn't even die of lung cancer. But turns out that's the exact same episode where Maddox revealed that his sister committed suicide. So the next episode, he starts it off with this week's spiel, you know, I talked about my sister committed suicide. So the next opportunity starts it off with this week's spiel, you know, I talked about my sister's suicide, a bunch of people. It wasn't even maybe. It wasn't even maybe. Nice comments

while we hanged out, I keep her chin up. And then there was this guy and he brings my comment up, criticizing him for Bill Hicks. And when he addressed the point, he just says, he's just implying that I'm an asshole because I criticize him after sister committed suicide how about that i was the first time

he used his sister suicide to put criticism from about that i can't fucking believe it yeah thanks dick he's patient zero for maddox using his half's half half sister suicide is a human shield for criticism interesting uh... he should make like uh... half half half half sister suicide is a human shield for criticism. Interesting. He should make like make a literal shield out of her, carry it around with them.

Blocks, block, block. I mean, if he's saying we're making jokes about it, why not? Already guilty. Why not? You want to race me to the fucking bottom? I'll see you there. Don't worry. I know I'm going. I define the guilty. Why not? You wanna race me to the fucking bottom? I'll see you there. Don't worry, I know I'm going. I define the bottom.

Yeah. I got a little antenna with a light on it. I hide it in my hair, but when I get really upset and fucking, no, you're like one of the deep sea fish. Yeah, when we get down the dark enough, it fucking springs out. Right, so I could see. So you can lure somebody to your to your tooth filled mouth and

Trump on the like a see where your vulnerable spots are and look at them all right how do you like to play a game of jerking off or not jerking off why not hey what's up thick this is an entry into the jerking off or not jerking off uh... entry and what makes me a rage is when is being new at work. When you're new at work and everybody, everybody talks to you as though they, you ask in question, and they talk to you as though you ought to know the answer to the question, and especially where I work, everyone speaks in, everyone speaks in acronym. Did you put the WL4 by the 516 or the,

or that's not a acronym, but Jorgi, you ought to be five by the 427. And I don't even know what the fuck that is. I don't have a frame reference for anything. Yeah. That's my rage. I think people know what I'm talking about. It's pretty annoying because there's no,

there's no remedy for it. You just have to be an idiot for six months And now the big reveal is Getting jerk off by my wife That counts. Yeah, that counts. Yeah, though. It's a little different. Yeah, sheeding. It's cheating a little bit. Yeah, you know, yeah But the yeah, okay good. We got you sir. We fucking got you. Hey dick, how upset are you? You didn't make the alternative influence network conspiracy theory graph. I mean they got a medicare on there. Yeah, getting this even Ralph. I think is on there somewhere. I mean, even Monday and Fat God on there,

I don't see your name anywhere. I guess your views are in line with the FSHW. I don't know. Yeah, I am, of course, I support diversity and taxes. If you're giving a little bit, why can't you give it a little bit more? Do you know what he's talking about, the influence graph?

No, but I don't think I need to. Somebody made a black, not a black list, it's a black spider graph of all the people who deserve to be killed. Yeah, yeah. And it's people like Ralph report and Mr. Metacard and Dave Rubin is on there somehow. It's people like Ralph report and Mr. Metacard and Rick and Dave Rubin is on there somehow. It's weird.

I think it's like a Cuckray gun is on there. It was like some kind of machine learning of who is who is in the sphere of Nair du Wells. This is like you need to work a little harder than I guess. I guess so. Get on there. I need to be a little harder than I guess. I guess so. Get on there. I need to be more political. Yeah.

Right? Yeah. Well, I mean, that's probably true if you want to be on that list. Yeah. Who's Andrew from Eugene, Oregon? Good. Good. Good.

Good. What makes me reach is 80 is Scott. I fucking hate the 80s. The one. They're, they're as soft for both. You know, I'll write down a whole fucking treaty from time for why. You know, I'll give you a measure ant on them. Let me just say in this moment, and the reason why the whole reason why it calls that,

I think it by the way, but I don't care what you believe, okay? The world is more fun of fairy tales. The world is more fun with colorful stories than insane bullshit and space gods, okay? Don't get me here you're over you know you know you know you know you know you know that's what I typically reveal that we talk to students with you know you know what you think you go

put your fucking head to snow all right no one cares you have to say what's out of the way let's have our stupid stories let's have a fun part of being human you want to destroy destroy every good thing, you have to cool thing about being a fucking person. Or sex is just for, you know, you get babies out of those, not just for fun, you know, it's the same kind of thing. And fucking kind of thing. It's so, so pathetic. So particular. I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just,

I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just,

I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just,

I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm God, no free will, just religion is evolution. Religion is basically like the thumb. Some people evolved to believe in a God and it made them months toppable because they're willing to die for pretty much anything. And they also weren't willing to wait, rape each other in their sleep every night because they thought they'd be punished by an

invisible space wizard. Like, it's more important to human love evolution than thumb and the people who had it take over. And then I, like, I kept talking about that. Somebody in the Reddit said that I can't, I shouldn't be that much of an analyst because it would be, it's not, it won't work out well for me. Well, I think that's, you can't tell someone who doesn't believe in free will to stop being an analyst.

That's kind of ironic, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, little. I said, where were you 30 years ago, buddy? Come on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's been working for me for three decades. So far, man, shit. Hey, Sean. Just one calling because I'm newly a Patreon to the big show. Thank you. So I'm getting all the bonus episodes and I'm starting way back in bonus episode one. Listen to bonus episode two right now, you talk about Patreon. I want to know what you think about people going on

Patreon and supporting people who make porn because porn is free basically basically speaking porn is free. so what do you think about that i thought that was interesting i don't pay for porn i don't know anybody who does i think it's weird yeah but you get no you get to feel like you own them a little bit if you pay for it yeah i'm on a couple of i'm on i'm subscribed to a couple chicks who do porn on patreon i originally signed up just to message them to be news babes. And one wrote me back right before the show.

Like I'm going after like comically bust the women to try to lure them into doing sure this for the show. But I think that's it. You get some kind of like, because it's human nature, it's reciprocation. If you give somebody a dollar, if you give them a piece of paper, they feel like they owe you something. It makes sense to me. It's like a deeper kink than just watching porn.

Got it. Yeah. Like the porn star owes you something. We got to figure something out or we're going to end up like Tito. So we got to find out some way to To enhance the experience. Give it a shot. Give a shot Sean. Okay. Sign up for some Subscribe to one of these chicks on Patreon

See how it feels See if you get do an a b-test Jerk off to a girl you support on Patreon and then just a girl you find for free. I think you're going to find one is a more enjoyable experience than the other. You've also already told yourself that she has more value. Yes. It works both ways. It's practically your wife.

Yeah. Because you're, you know, you're supporting her. You're giving her like a percentage of a wife. I'm not saying it's full on wife, but maybe subscribe to that modern Medusa chick, the blonde girl in the American presence video. I gotta get her on ask her, make her watch that one. Yes. Well, it makes me a rage is the sign drive like your kids live here.

Like who's that sign for? Because if you have kids, you're probably grown up enough. You know, being generous, you're probably grown up enough, not be whipping around, you know, these tight curves that sit on top. Residential. I don't do that shit. Well, I was about 90. But, you know, if you don't have kids,

I don't know what's going on with that. I don't know, go for like a walk. Should I be driving like the metaphorical concept of my children live here? Cause in that case, I want to kill them. Oh, once I say you're probably driving angry. Yeah, drive like your kids live here. Yeah.

If my kids are out in the street, they have a coming, playing around. How many times have you fucking told them? You don't play in the street. Yeah. They should be inside being on Twitch doing building up their subs. Yeah, it's, it's, got bills to pay.

It's 6.30, Dad's almost home. You're about to die. Get on the sidewalk. Yeah, get out of here. No. I'll put a sign up, hey kids, play like your Dad's almost home. You're about to die, get on the sidewalk. Yeah, get out of here. I'll put a sign up, hey kids, play like your dad's driving here. Yes, right? Good way to teach him, well, not only literacy,

but responsibility at that a young age. Undercoaked french fries make me a fucking rage. Proper french fry is nice and crispy on the fucking outside and might as well be hollow on the inside. Undercooked fucking French fries are slimy and gritty at the same time and can ruin my fucking week. Yeah. They're deep-fried them completely and paying these minimum wage freaks to do their job poorly at this point. I'm going to lose my mind if I get under cooked french fries again, but I'm going to post all. It is.

I'm not going to do that. I should do over. You just throw the whole thing out the window. I don't remember the last time I had undercooked French fries. Really? Yeah. It seems to be certain places are not hard. Like if you find a place that does it once, they'll do it again. Is it, hey, Kimball, are you, Kimball, do you want to get on and complain about what

you're talking about in the chat? Oh, God, a typical Kimball. Jesus Christ. Are you there, Kimball? And I didn't expect this. Yeah. So what's going on? Fight night with you and Rommel is not happening now. Rommel went low energy for episode two.

He stopped drinking, stopped taking benzos. It was a horrible show. Had to delete it. Had to scrap it, scrap the whole show, it's done. It's done! No! I had high hopes for you guys. On to the next. On to the next. I'll find the next and the same person, next person to bottom up the rage board, I'll scoop them up and take their content.

I mean, maybe it just needs to be the Kimbell show with a rotation of weird Attention seats. Basically see that on YouTube for jerking off. I have like a dumb cancer show on there. Yeah, well, that's disappointing It was sad. I was really disappointed for episode two I had high hopes going in like he kept call. Oh god. There's this weird audio Ramo has of him like prank calling his ex girlfriend like 40 times in an hour. That's not prank calling. Yeah, Ramo. Ramo's the weird thing about Ramo after I listened to that call. I wasn't sure how much of it was like a character and how much was actually him being a legitimate and sane person.

Yeah. It turns out he's an actually insane person. I mean, that's even better. Yeah. But the thing is he can't listen to reason because he's too insane to actually understand stuff. You sound like he's telling you. He's really wonky videos of him, like harassing black workers that I checkers. Hmm. Okay. Why black specifically? Because he hates black people in pre-sure. All right. All right. Well, that's too bad. Does anything make you...

That's a lot more love to you, I guess. Yeah. That's too bad. You got to find somebody, man. I'll find somebody. I'll figure it out. Fight night three coming soon, probably next night 11. You got a whole year. Yeah, I got time. I got time. Don't worry. Does anything make you rage? Maybe getting banned from Twitter I got a whole year. Yeah, I got time. I got time.

All right. Does anything make you rage? Maybe getting banned from Twitter from making fun of pedophiles. Yeah. That's, I do apologize to me still. I did see that. All right, buddy. Good luck. Driving me on. Yeah.

Do you want one more? Yeah. Campbell just can't make it work. Flag, you know, destroyed. Rahmul, come on. Hey, Dick, I got a race for you. Sorry, I'm in my car. Because I'm in a mid-proffess of the thing that has made me a race, I suppose.

When you've been around in the Natterro, they play a video game and then all of a sudden you get a phone call from a girl that you used to work with It was like hey You should come over we should drink whiskey. Mm-hmm. I'm like, okay. That's fine. We'll do that And I'm in the car don't know what the fuck I'm doing fucking out of my mind Probably won't be able to get my dick up either so we're gonna see I'm just gonna fucking I'm gonna buy the ticket And I'm gonna take this my dick up either. So we're just going to see, I'm just going to fucking, I'm going to buy this ticket and I'm going to take this right. I'm going to get the little bumpy long way.

I'm going to drop that shit on the board. I'm going to try to just experience mother fucker. All right, fuck yourself. Love you Sean. Love you too. I mean, we really need some kind of a device that will counteract the effects of liquor and drugs on the email erection. I don't know what it is.

I don't trust the pills. No, no. I don't think more chemicals in the body is going to fix this problem. You know, when you just, you sit down at night to have a nice evening with yourself of drinking into, drinking into a coma, drinking into a morose coma, drinking into a morose stupor and playing

video games. And then when you can't play the mini-mure watching video games and then just passing out with Dr. Strange Love on TV and you get hit out of the blue with free pussy. Happens, it happens once, you know, two or three times a year, and you're in no condition. No condition, but you can't say no. You can't say no to, you can't, you just can't say no to that,

because then you can't live with yourself. Can't wake up and see yourself as a man, the next day, and think, what you couldn't beat the liquor? Because then you gotta admit to yourself that you have a problem. And you don't have a problem. Right.

It's just the side effects. The Adderall is cooking along fine. It's making, because I'm focusing on how drunk I am. It's perfect. Yeah. Yeah. Forgetting about all my cares, because I'm focused on the alcohol. Right.

That's the combo. Yeah. So you need some kind of an apparatus or device. Some kind of an apparatus. Something that's, yeah. Some retro shock therapy that are some, because even if they're, they're most likely drunk. So they're going to be, well, yeah, I mean, they're clearly, clearly exhibiting bad judgment. And you get over there and you just, you just going through the motions with a fucking

cuckspaghetti wiggling around between your legs is such a fucking shame every time you're hitting every tech and I get a rain check of course not yeah that currency is about to come to our senses that currency is no good the next day yeah you know fucking expires that law that landing window has expired man but what are you gonna do? Stop doing drugs, stop drinking. No. That's why you're drinking. Cause moments like that, fleeting moments gone. Gone.

This is cycle. Gone. Gone. It could, it has the potential to change your life, you know? Yeah. But you've blown it. Oh, you've blown it. All right, everybody, see you next Tuesday.

You know, but you've blown it. You've blown it. Yeah. All right, everybody. See you next Tuesday.