The Dick Show - Episode 130 - Dick on Taxing Women

Episode Date: November 27, 2018

"Winners Drink", my new drinking card game is ON SALE NOW, blown eulogies, how Nintendo has screwed us our entire lives, a four-hour blunder over "the map says!", Boomer football vs. Zoomer video games, flavored vapes and screw the children, the curse of the pinkie toe, The THOT Audit and Women: God's Tax on Life, how to give a girl an eating disorder, chicks with guy friends, when to keep your mouth shut, Jurassic Park and a Vore fetishist, a man's first time, Bleh Rodriguez calls in and giggles, Denzel vs. Peach Round 2, Sean's drag queen persona, background checks for guns, and the restraining order transcript between Mental Jess and 80s Girl is on the way; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey get in, you love Dig, you got it? The shower or everything is a contest coming to you live from a mountain bunker deep in the heart of the city of failure. I'm your host, 20 million dollar man. Recently voted America's best Mexican nine weeks running Dick Masterson with me is always Sean the audio engineer. Hello Dick. Hey, what's up buddy, we missed you last week. I missed being in the, I hate calling it. It's not the same.

No, it's not the same. I need to see people. The phone is, to me, the most disconnected that I can get. I prefer in person or text. Honestly. Yeah, because in text, at least you can imagine, you know, you're in your own little virtual reality and you can build it up to be character in it,

but over the phone, it just feels like everybody's running away from you. It's very strange. And you're on speaker phone. I wanted to say halfway through the show. Sean, you're just, this is a waste of time for you. Oh yeah. Yeah, just go get out of it.

I had a good time with your family. Well, it's a great show to listen to. Yeah, let's not, of course you had a great time. Yeah. Because you're still listening to the show that we're doing here in the studio. True. But you need to be here. You have a feeling with the zingers coming

when you're in the studio. I notice. Yeah, that's true. I managed to, I managed to time a couple last week. Yeah, you had to, so you're an ass man when that guy threatened to cut off some women's pants. Yeah. Christopher the key.

Yeah. The de-instrangulation I got to kick out of myself. I put it to a vote whether or not people want him to come to call back in. Oh, well, I sent everybody to madcastmedia.com. You did. Find Maddox's newest episode and vote one way if you wanted to call back in and vote another way

if you never want to hear from him again. Dead heat. Oh, really? Dead even. Dead even. He won, just, you know, at that point, if somebody is that dead even, he's calling back in. The tie goes to the runner. The tie goes to the runner.

If it's that close, it's not going to be every week, guys, but he's got it. There's just too many people want to know how the story unfolds. I find him fascinating. Me too. But apparently I've got to now reach out to his jailbird love interest. He's so sweet on. Right.

And try to get her. Maybe I could set her up with a call or something like that. We tried to do it with lettuce jones when he went to the clink. Yeah, he did manage to leave voicemails, right? Well, let us Jones left us a voicemail every week, but for some reason, they went to Tanner who sent them to Mad Cux, who then sent them to Astereos. Oh, that's right. Astereos needed premonoctus on the let us voicemails for some reason. Everybody but the show, got everybody but me. So then when lettuce got out of prison,

like the week before I got nine weeks or nine whatever it was, five months of lettuce showing's voicemails. Well, I listened to them in my own in the comfort of my own home, but nobody else got to hear this magic. Well, I wonder how lettuce is. We haven't else got to hear this magic. I don't know. I wonder how lettuce is.

We haven't heard from him in a while. We haven't heard from him in a long time. I hope he's doing well. It was a rough week, last week too with Andy, the passing of Andy Lee. Yeah. That was a bummer. Yeah.

Saved it till the end. Yeah, I got nice and sauce, and then gave an absolutely atrocious eulogy. Oh, I don't think it was absolutely atrocious. I had so many salient points that were well-crafted and evocative emotionally as a nice tribute for Andy, and it just came out like angry gibberish. Oh, the, well, you sort of,

that's what makes me a raised- The eulogy at the end. Well, I did. Well, that was the sort of make me raised the eulogy at the end. Well, I did. Well, that was the angry part to me. Yeah, yeah. It was all angry. I have fourth beer. Yeah.

It's all, one momentum, one way or the other with that fourth beer sends you off into it. It's like Apollo 13. You're coming into the atmosphere, that fourth beer will, it will burn you up on reentry or skip you off the atmosphere like a rock and throw into the sun. You got to be coming at the perfect angle.

The perfect angle and I was not. I was very tilted talking about crying all episode like it's the view. So that was, I guess that's what makes me enraged this week. Bouched you the geez. Oh. See, it was, botched suicide notes was from last week. Yeah. Because Andy had that, he didn't put a dot in front of that, right? It did seem to keep us sense of humor.

Yeah, he did. Botched you, the Jesus, um, his family, uh, DMed me on Twitter. Oh, sister and his mom, yeah. Yeah. Those too much. I had to get a good answer, right? We'll talk, talk about you want to have the ultimate feeling of, much, I had to get, I couldn't answer right, we'll talk about, you wanna have the ultimate feeling of fuck, I got a, I waited too long to write back,

I got a write back. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. No, I can't. The worst feeling in the world is terrible. It is, it's terrible. The email's sitting there and this is for a lot. It's terrible. Any situation, hey, friends will email you,

I'm coming into town for a weekend and then it'll be Monday morning Oh, man. Why didn't I just what did I send this email? I couldn't I spent all of Sunday Just laying on the couch because I had to take a me sit down and watch football for a little bit or watch people play football video games for a little bit Sorry, I missed the opportunity. Well now I look like such a fucking asshole What am I gonna respond to this in a year and a half? No, I missed the opportunity. Now I look like such a fucking asshole. What am I gonna respond to this in a year and a half? No, I know.

This is the worst one of those types of emails that not have responded to. Yeah, yeah. Ah, have another drink. Ah, I could take a look at this. I could take a look at this after another drink or two. I could take a look at this one more beer, then I'm gonna crack that email open,

send back a nice reply. Oops, very thoughtful. Fuck, I'm awake again. I fucked up again. Yeah. I'm waking up again. I can't fucking hang over here. I just keep starting on the fourth beer.

Damn it, damn it. I wake up, most shrink, would you like to continue? Yes, yes, yes, give it to me again, please. Today is gonna be the day. Today is gonna be the day I answer my emails. Put that on my tombstone. Today will be the day that I answer these emails. This time I mean it.

This time I mean it. I'm thinking though, for Andy, I was thinking about it more, because I did that draw stream. I drew the thumbnail. Nobody else wanted to touch it. It was cool. Thank you. I drew a butt.

A butt. There's a lot of butts. A lot of butt. Andy loved butts. I drew a butt heaven. That was by Butt Ross. That's my new, hard to say. Butt Ross.

It's good. Happy little butts. Yeah. Everywhere. So I butt, Ron. But it's gross. Happy little butts everywhere. So I butt-rock, can I can't draw and ask to save his life? It's amazing. Beautiful scenery, can't draw a butt. It's your butt to save his life, but gross. I got something about art that makes me rich as well.

Yeah, but I was thinking during that that I'm gonna do something in the new year, maybe we'll have a memorial, share it or a, for Andy, and then use the money for something funny that will trigger the lips, obviously, but something some kind of funny dedication. That'd be good.

For the man, I think it'd be. Yeah. Why something permanent, you know, like you put a brick in the side of a, you know, like how sometimes hospitals sell like bricks except we'll just get an expensive brick and throw it through the hospital. I've had a sender block. Sender block. It'll be a big wall of bricks with one sender block with a scroll. Yeah. Brandy on it. Anyway, I got something very exciting, something that I'm very excited about coming out on Cyber Monday. I've made a game for the people of the show.

Look for an email. I wanted to do something for the patrons of the show. I wanted to do it last year. And I thought, I hate cards against humanity. Yeah. Everyone knows that. This is the season for the cards against humanity shit. I do do. This is the season for all their cute fucking jokes. We bought a plot of land. So Trump can't build his wall. Our people do that. That's what that was that was something they did.

Cards against humanity marketing is like it's like priest humor for people who hate religion. They still like those shitty priest jokes, though. Yeah, everything in our, we got a flash sale today for Black Friday where things are 99% off. Check out this cardboard cutout of Ryan Gosling. 99% off. Like what the fuck is, just shut the fuck up.

Shut up. I hate Ryan Gosling, too. And I hate your stupid game. So I made a game I made a card game I'm gonna put it up in the store. It might be I tried to capture What I think is fun about Drinking being out with your friends and what the the start of it was I hate in drinking games how It's always the losers who drink. Right. Because that is not what it's about. I always drink anyway. Of course. But then

you feel like you're not living up to the spirit of the game, right? You get to a point where in flip cup, you're like knocking over your own players drinks. It's like, well, I can't sit here. If you guys delay this game any longer, I'm gonna have, I'm gonna drink this beer and you're gonna have to fill it up again. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm drinking the whole time. You don't drink when you lose, winners drink. Yeah.

And that's the name of the game. So it's a card game. Turning winners into losers. We're in 2018. Called winners drink. You play it, go to a bar, play with your friends. I don't know, it's the kind of thing where, it's one of these things where you're really, 2018. We're in tears. 2018. Called Winners Drink. You play it, go to a bar, play with your friends. I don't know.

It's the kind of thing where it's one of these things where you're really, I really am afraid that it's gay to use an outdated term. You know, the context of that term is lost, but you know what I'm talking about? Either it will be fun or it's going to be a little, it might be a little bit gay. I'm worried about it. But I'm still putting it out there because I meant to do it last year and I didn't do it. And I appreciate everyone who supports this show

and subscribes to this show. So I said, look, what the hell, what are you gonna do? Be worried if something is too gay for another year. Just put it out there, you pussy. People will make fun of you if it's gay. No big deal. Wouldn't be the first time. Wouldn't be the first time, right?

Just put it out there, fuck it, fuck it. That's my sales pitch for this thing. How fuck it, fuck it. Why not, fuck it. I put a lot of work into it, though. Clay Burton, the artist, has some beta testers. I sent it to a bunch of work into it though. All right Clay Burton, the artist is an honor. Had some beta testers. Oh nice.

I sent it to a bunch of dickheads, beta tests, and one of them got back to me with feedback. The other two died of alcohol poisoning. Yeah, six. Yeah, I hope they had a good time. Yeah, I guess. There you go. So I'm gonna put that up on Cyber Monday.

And if you're one of the maybe I'll just say, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, look, check your emails or just check the shop.tik.co. Okay. I've also got metal jess's court transcript. I was wondering when this, yes, I did. I was way you said about five days or something, the last time I heard saw you post or something.

Yeah, you have this? Yeah. Well, I went to the courthouse to get a copy of the defense of the restraining orders for fun, and I learned this. Just for fun. Yeah, just for fun. You know.

I have it for my own personal records because all this lawsuit is building up again, ramping up. I got so excited about the sanctions. I gotta get some, I gotta get some law. Yeah, I gotta get get some law, I got to get some documents in my hands. And I learned that I could get a courtroom transcript, which I didn't, I didn't even experience it. I only experienced the outside of Maddox

piling his door like a puppy and trying to ask them the mayor of Muscle City if he could get in and explain himself. Yeah. So I'm, I don't know what we and trying to ask the mayor of Muscle City if he could get in and explain himself. Yeah. So I'm, I don't know what we're gonna do with that. It should have it this week. Maybe we'll do, maybe that'll be the bonus episode. I don't know though. Depends how, depends how funny it is,

but it will be. Right, right. I think I've broken my pinky toe. Oh yeah. That makes me a rage. Yes. Nothing will bring you down like that. When they start replacing body parts

with cybernetic parts, replace that. Just cut that one off. Yeah. Put like a pocket, put something I can use on it because that little motherfucker only seeks to destroy me. Yeah, I don't know what that thing really, how much of an impact does it have in your balance and your walking?

I don't know. I'm sure there's some kind of fucking doctor who will write anything. I mean my foreskin more than I need that stupid little toe. It's gotta be, it's gotta be, it's gotta be, it's gotta be the least useful one. It has to be. I'm getting fatter and fatter.

I accidentally stepped on a scale last week and determined that I need to lose 40 pounds to feel good about myself again. Or I'm gonna have to start going to church. If I don't lose at least 40 pounds, I'm gonna have to start looking for a higher power to tell me that I'm a good person because this is unacceptable and I can't work any of it off because my fucking foot

is a constant source of pain that I can't stop ramming into things. Man, I've got that feeling that I used to get after like a week of binge drinking. Only it's been binge eating. Oh! Like all this disgustingly good food stuff that I like never eat in such quantities. Yeah. I'm just like, I'm like trying to get my bearings. That's how I feel.

It's like, okay, you're sober again. Like, okay, like this. What happened? What happened? It's been so. Yeah. I feel, I think I have diabetes. I don't know if there's an online test you can take for that but I'm pretty sure I have it and I can't work it off and it's so fucking frustrating. I

can't even put a shoe on this stupid bitch. Jesus. Yep. Done that. Not fun. Tell you know it's weird I notice about Thanksgiving. What's that? The dads, the dads, my dad and my brother-in-law's dad. They, those guys can watch football forever. Yeah, all day. You could put it on and they would never, they would never look away. They need to have it immediately. They can't watch 10 seconds of a video game.

It's like they're allergic to it. ideally, they can't watch 10 seconds of a video game. It's like they're allergic to it. I don't know if it's some kind of power move or something, but those motherfuckers, like I'm superior because I don't watch this. I don't know. I don't know how they get absolutely nothing. It was fucking great. The Liars went, because they're, you know,

I can only take so much fucking football, especially when it's not on mute. Yeah. But then the little guy comes in and he's like, hey, I'm gonna load up to Switch. What do you old fucks think about that? Yeah. And then it's, yeah. It's finally, I'm not having to make this.

How about you like, you know, go to a bedroom or something? No. Not on the, no, big TV's always big TV. Cause you wanna know, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, people, they don't feel like a, he tells them. Yeah, you too. Why don't you two load up the NFL app on your phones and go into the master bedroom and lay in bed with each other and watch this shit. You fucking greetings. You fucking jerks. Do you even know what is a video game?

Yeah, because you're getting out voted here. Yeah. I'm a kid on the other one, but I'm going, I'll go all in on the video game. Right. I would rather watch the little man jump Mario into a pit for six hours, then watch a bunch of muscle dummies tickle each other to the ground and listen to Joe Bucks crooked ear to ask, talk about it. Much rather rather much rather. But what makes me rage about that is the Mario Party, the game, get this scam.

The Mario Party game, the controllers don't work. There's like a pro controller that you can buy for the system to have a little bit of a nicer feel to it. The switch comes with those little goofy controllers. I actually played Mario Party. Yeah. Yeah, like a few weeks ago. Yeah.

I got like shamed into it. Yeah. And some of it was sort of fun because you play all these different games and contests and stuff. Some of it was sort of fun and some of it was kind of not, I mean, I, well, you'd like, I would never seek it out. You'd like to play it. But for some reason, they made it not work with the big pro controllers that everyone has. Oh, yeah. You get these little tiny things where you like, you hold it like a, like a gun sometimes and then you hold it flat other times. Yeah. So if you downloaded that game, you are S-O-L. If you want to load that thing

up and play it with the family for the holidays, you are stuck sitting there watching a little motherfucker build puzzles holding a brick of an Xbox controller in your hand that they decided to not let work with the game just to fuck you out of more money for new rinky dink controllers. Yeah, it is so it was so fucked and annoying to have to have to have absolutely no say to have absolutely no autonomy in this shit show game we're watching. Yeah, that sucks and I'm not surprised It's like, you know fucking fucking Apple, doing away with the ubiquitous stereo mini. It reminded me how much I hate Nintendo. I can't help it. Yeah. Watching it.

After this shit with the robot, that they promised to high heavens in the 80s. Oh, Rob? Or Christmas? Rob the robot? Oh, that was the stupidest thing ever. Be a big fucking scam. Yeah. You get it and it moves around like a one-legged cat on a frozen pond.

I never even saw it in person. It sounds like shit. The games are totally dumb. It's not fun at all. What's it supposed to do? It was supposed to put Nintendo in stores that don't sell video games. That was the entire purpose of it. Admittedly.

How did it interact with any games? You locked a controller in front of it, and it would pick up gyros with these shitty robot gyros. gyros was like a game, right? Yeah, barely. Yeah. I don't think it would qualify as a game.

I would drop it on the buttons and spin, and that would do shit on the screen. What? But you had to like pause it and tell it what to do. Such a fucking scam. Yeah, stupid. Power Glove, also big scam. Stuban.

Nintendo has been fucking me over by annually since I was a kid. Yeah. I don't know how to fuck, I can't fuck them back. So I'll keep buying that shit. Yeah. But every year it's something, it's some other new fucking way to fuck me over Nintendo Making a making an entire OS dedicated to building little miniature versions of you that women can't stop fucking playing

Putting strains on relationships and pocketbooks the ESRB That's their fault They I I I remember in the 80s violence and video game is a big thing. Nintendo swings their dick in and blames it all on Sega. No supporting games. She's no saying, no saying that this is art for adults. This is freedom of expression. They just came in saying, we make wholesome. We make wholesome games. Sega is fucking it up. God damn. And Sega's lying because they know that all kids are buying their mature games. How short-sighted. Like, are you fucking serious?

Yeah, you're really gonna throw your brother under the bus because he looks different than you. Fucking assholes. Oh, it made me. If I could have pulled Demario Party game out and chucked it, I would have, but it was downloaded, so I couldn't. I had to destroy the fucking ones. I found some Italians and beat the hell out of them.

Um, yeah. Let's see here. Flavored vapes. You know what's going on in the flavored vapes world? I do not. This is, I kind of just want to read this article because it's so funny. Flavored vapes.

Everyone's got to stick up their ass about flavored vapes now. I got into this argument with this stupid Twitter thought. What are these, do you have a vape? I would assume you've tried it, right? We have vape weed. Yeah, because it was so much easier. Oh, yeah.

No rolling joints and shit in the bong is just, that's cool. No, everybody, everybody I know is smoked weed. Pretty much vapes. If I hold a bong, I feel like I should be in like a steam punk cosplay. Yeah. Big ordeal. I mean, this was one of my fears and go chemist, like a Bunsen burner here.

Yeah. And then when the bulls kind of get a snap, you like reach your finger in and pack it down a little more where you're still holding. If I may, you got a resin on the tip of your finger all the time. Yeah. Bong is a lifestyle. Yeah. It's not. Well, but it's not really.

People don't really. That's in Georgia, Peterson's. That's in my 12 rules of life to compete with Jordan Peterson's. Stop using the bomb. Yeah. There's, I don't think there's any need for it anymore. I guess people still like to smoke blunts or joints or blunts, but...

Yeah, J's. Whatever. Mind if I do a J? You recalled it a J? Do a J? No, I've never called it a J. Playsing called it a J. A J?

Yeah, we went to the symphony. My friends went to the LA Phil with a... Doobie. Smoking doobs. She busted out a J. You friends went to the LA Phil with L.A. Smoking tubes. She busted out a J. Said, you might have found you a J. Yeah. What do you?

Yeah. The L.A. talks like that. Yeah, yeah. No. I don't. Um, anyway. This was the headline in the New York Times. The FDA started cracking down on vapes.

Yeah. So everybody starts cracking down at the same time. Sure. Because of the kids. It's always the kids. The price. When you want to fuck the populace, you do it through the kids, you know?

I'm so, I'm so, Oh, it's got to protect the kids. I'm so fucking sick of the kids. Even when I was a kid, I was sick of the kids. Yeah. Because even the kids know, the kids are looking around going, you know what, a lot of these motherfuckers don't need to be adults.

You can tell right of what, you can tell already that they're not going to be, they're not going to be pulling the ship in the same direction, so to speak. Yeah. Right? Yeah. Maybe we should make some, maybe we should just have poison cigarettes, skip them right to the finish line. Yeah.

Or you're going to say, no, that's it. You can to the finish line. Yeah. What are you gonna say? No, that's it. You can tell, the kids know. You can. If you walked in and said, hey kids, you're like, I know this shitty kid. I'm in class with who I hate is gonna be a shitty adult. Yeah.

And they are. Yeah. You walk in and say, okay kids, let's put out all the kids, every classroom, let's put all the kids in order. And you know what kind of order I'm talking about. Right, and I'm gonna start you. And I'm gonna start you.

Right, so. Damn it. That's what you're talking about. Yeah, yeah. Oh, why did I just blow that whole joke? I can't say what I was gonna say. God damn it. You started the bottom and you go up and you tell me when to stop. Yeah, the kids would know.

You're gonna start it one and then you go, yeah, yeah, get that guy in here. Keep going. Yeah. Okay, there, there, there, there. Yeah, we like that guy. We need that guy. Yeah, yeah.

Just saying. Kids aren't so great. A lot of them aren't. They're gonna be people someday. It's important to remember that. I know kids. Always important to remember with kids and with charity and everything.

Those people, as soon as you fix their cancer, they're gonna be right back out on the road. Yeah. Yeah. So I should do a little screening. Other than cancer screening, a little screening on whether you deserve your cancer fixed. Screening.

It's all I'm saying. Price of cool. This is what this article, price of cool. This is what this article, the price of cool. It's already, yeah. Cause they're coming after the vapes. Sean, you and I, we can't have a coconut flavored nicotine. Yeah. And fruity flavored nicotine.

You understand it's because of the kids, because every broad in their 30s doesn't need to go to menchies or to get fucking gummy bear yogurt twice a week or else they'll faint right. That's because of the kids that they have that. No one's shutting down yogurt land because of that you don't drive by oh yeah, it's a bunch of baseball teams getting frozen yogurt. No, it's adults. That's right. Fucking pricks. Mm-hmm. The price of cool, a teenager, a jewel. J-U-U-L, I guess, is a kind of nicotine. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's, well, I think it's, that's the, it's the, inhaler, right? Yeah. Yeah. The price of cool, a teenager, a jewel,

and nicotine addiction. Mm-hmm. E-cigarettes may help, may help tobacco smokers quit. May. But the alluring devices can swiftly include a nicotine habit and teenagers who never smoked. This is the tale of one person's struggle. I don't, maybe it's not funny to read this, but I laughed at the entire fucking thing. I don't know. You're talking about inhaling a vape.

A vape. Yeah. A vape. Yeah. You've got, when you walk down, have you driven by an elementary school recently, do you see a lot of emphysema coming out of it? Because when I go, when I drive by a junior high, I see a bunch of colossally fat fucks. And then I see the same thing

when I'm driving around for the rest of the day. Yep. As I'm listening to happy as I'm watching kids scarfing down happy meals for the fucking toys. That's it. But it's the vapes. That's the problem because of the flavors. That's what's enticing the kids. Yeah. Not the grade, not the stimulant to escape this constant shit like this. He was supposed to inhale on something that looked like a flash drive and threw off a whisp of a cloud. What was the point?

A skeptical Matt Murphy saw his daredevil. So his first jewel at a high school party in the summer of 2016 in a suburban basement crowded with kids shouting over hip hop and swinging from Poland Spring water bottles filled with bottom shell vodka, followed by diet coke chasers. What the fuck are these kids drinking? First of all, drink Gatorade. If you're drinking shitty vodka,

Gatorade will mask the taste and it gets the liquor into your system faster. Fucking diet coke. It really does mask the taste. Yeah. Like that lemon lime gatorade. Yeah. I remember doing everything wrong in high school like that.

Diet Coke. Where did these children get diet coke? What kind of party is this? From you dad. Yeah. I got it by watching you. I would be way more pissed if some kids drank the last of my diet coke than my bottom shelf liquor.

No shit. I get decoy liquor. No shit. I get decoy liquor for that shit. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, kids are coming over. The Tito's and the Jamison go all the way in the back of the cupboard and then I just line it with pop off.

Frost. Yeah. Frost, all of the 999 vodka's in that bottle. They triple charcoal filtered vodka. Cake vodka, cake in the handle, the plastic handle, right? Yeah. Okay, you guys good. You didn't get through my pop off defense.

You didn't get through my frost vodka defenses to get the good stuff. Yeah, but you drank all my diet coke. They're trying to get your ass out of bed. I don't care how hungover you are, go to the store and buy me my diet coke. They're trying to get your ass out of bed. I don't care how hungover you are, go to the store and buy me more diet coke. I need that diet coke. Your tastes, but they're fucked.

You could have drank regular coke, you could have drank, you could have drank slice with that, you could have drank RC Cola. I need diet coke. Yeah. Go get, go replace it. Anyway, everybody knew better than to smoke cigarettes, but a few were amusing themselves by blowing

voluptuous clouds with clunky vapes that had been around since. So essential. I know. Boy, and now two years later, I'm sure he's probably living in a dumpster, right? I mean, I'm sure it's just destroyed him. It's just life.

It's funny. This is the New York Times, Sean. Oh, yeah. Okay. I know. This is the New York Times, Sean. Oh, yeah. Okay. I know. This is this is what gets people to read. Fulopsuous clouds. With clunky vapes that have been around since middle school. The this jewel looked puny in comparison.

Just try it. His friend urged. It's awesome. I don't believe that. Matt 17 drew a pleasing minty moistness into his mouth. Oh my god He held it kicked it to the back of his throat and let it balloon his lungs kicked it to the back of his head Look at that hip that hip parlance that Blinking an astonishment at the euphoric power punch of the nicotine He felt it what he would later refer to as the head rush. And he's been chasing it ever since. It was love at first puff.

Oh my God. The next day he asked to hit his friends, Julegan, what a mouche. Yeah. Hey man, can I get some of that sweet Julegan? Yeah, yeah. Good. Did you smoke in high school?

Did you do any bad stuff? What a, what a, well I drank a lot. But yeah, but no, no, I would, I would smoke. As you should. I would smoke, yeah, for a little bit, you did, what I drank a lot, but yeah, yeah, but no, no, I would, I would smoke, I would smoke. Yeah, for a little bit, you know, friends, I never liked it. It was very easy for me not to, not to become a smoker. I tried to pick up smoking, but it was such a pain in the ass when you run out of cigarettes to go get more cigarettes. Yeah, like answering those emails. My brother could, could have become a smoker. He really liked it. Yeah. Yeah, I, yeah, not for me. You got to do what you love.

Yeah. The next day he asked to hit his friend's jewel again and the next and the next. He began seeking it out whenever he could. That he was a sustainable feeling. Three, sometimes four hits a day. It's like he's got a crack habit. Sounds like he's jerking off.

Yeah, it does. Hey man, you got to hit this. You got to get in on some of this jerk. He's addicted to blowing dudes or something, you know, so began a toxic relationship with an e-cigarette that would over the course of the next two years develop into a painful nicotine addiction that drained his savings left him feeling winded when he played hockey. Mario Lemieux used to smoke like a pack and a half a day before he made the NHL. I think he was still smoking in his first couple seasons. Sean, it left him feeling winded when he played youth high school hockey.

Yeah. You can't get a concussion if you're winded. Well, yeah. Oh, this fucking thing. This thing, this is written fucking people. Well, it's dragged me insane because did you see in Florida that they're so people are so pissed off about vaping. They crammed it through with offshore drilling in Florida.

There was a real, they passed an amendment to ban in the same, in the same ban, they passed an amendment to ban off-shore drilling and vaping indoors. And I fucking know I blame 100% women and they're not wanting to smell anything offensive. I fucking know that if you hammered people, if you hammered men on this,

they're just gonna, all of them will be like, eventually, well, I mean, wife just hates it. And if you hammer women similarly, every fucking one. Yeah, do whatever you want, but I'm just sick of smelling it. It's the only smell that they mind, which is ironic because all of them fucking stink.

It's amazing how inoffensive they actually smell. I mean, you remember Lelzike chemicals. It doesn't really even smell. It's amazing. Like, I know guys who, you know, there are always vaping weed and like, there's no smell. No, it's remarkable. It's crazy. Offshore drilling and vaping in the same, same swoop. Yeah. So began a toxic relationship with an e-cigarette that would, over the course of the next two years, develop into a paint, oh yeah, drained his savings. How fucking much money do you spend on fame? He's like 17 or 16, right?

Yeah. What savings do you have at 17 years old? Yeah. 300 bucks? Yeah. You got a little wad of cash in your sock drawer. Drain his savings. So he basically, so he became, he became a smoker.

Right? I mean, I guess. I guess. They're met snappish odds with friends who he always wanted to munch off of him. Oh no, who always wanted to munch off of his jewel and culminated in a shouting, tearful confrontation with his parents. What in the fuck is happening?

I can't believe this article got written. This is the fucking future, man. That's just a barricade. It's an all barricade. It's all a barricade. It's fucking embarrassing. And I really hate it. The FDA's long deliberated moves are driven by new figures from the CDC showing a 78% increase

in vaping by high school students with 3.6 million high school and middle school students now using e-cigarettes. You know what? Fuck them. Hi, how's everybody such a incredible parent when their own kids are so fucking stupid and fat? How is how are all these people such incredible parents? When their own kids are such complete pieces of shit Yeah, these are this these are not problems like this is not a problem. No, it's not an epidemic

It's not a problem. No, we're still working. we're still working on enforcing the first 10 laws we ever made. Still haven't got that knocked out. We don't need a bunch of new ones. Yeah. It's too fucking, it's too much. It's too much. Right now, a lot of the flavors being marketed seem to be clearly targeting teens.

Rubenstein said, I think it's difficult to argue that you're marketing these products to adults trying to ween off cigarettes when you're offering flavors like unicorn poop and bubble gum. These people aren't trying to ween off cigarettes. They're trying to smoke in more places. I love that.

I love that something somebody can think this, your marketing. It's hard to say that you're marketing towards adults when you're using Unicorn poop and bubble gum as flavors. Who so who the fuck is the Lego movie meant for then? No adults are watching that Shrek no have you seen the adult coloring book section on Amazon? This is who this is what people want. That's stuck in a world of Marlboro men who would smoke something called unicorn poop I don't know and what is what the fuck unicorn poop? I don't know. And what is, what the fuck does that, I don't even wanna know. Oh, well I don't know if I've got anything else on it.

No, it's ridiculous. Ridiculous. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this.

You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. You miss any of this. Let me see who I got here. Vaping, big problem. Offshore drilling and vaping, big problem. Voted up. See, too many pit bulls, I had that one. Yeah.

Did you see that? Did you see anything about that? There's so many pit bulls at animal shelters, at the no kill ones. That's almost all they are. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, cause chicks. Yes.

That they're considering loaning them to the homeless. So that at least they'll have somebody looking so that they don't have to kill them. Yeah, they're going to give the homeless. This is LA, right. They're going to give the homeless the Moustangest dogs on the planet. Awesome. Yeah, they're going to give the people

who make wonderful decisions. That's how we built a dog fighting empire out of Skid Row. That's how Escape from LA, the movie, started. Yeah. Well, what happened? Oh, we gave the homeless a bunch of pit bulls. What did they do? You could imagine.

They used it to defend their little tents and stuff. They started a little, they started like a Mad Max kind of civilization. Yeah. They're on dog law. They called it. Oh god. Um, let's see. 80s girl reading a map.

Oh yeah. That was a good one. I had a little, I had a little adventure. Oh boy. Sean, do you have ever, has this ever happened to you? Have you ever vocalized the process? I had a little adventure. Oh boy. Sean, do you ever, has this ever happened to you? Have you ever vocalized the process of getting directions? Oh, what do you mean? Have you ever gone through like a microwave

and written out all the steps of getting directions? You mean for somebody else? No, like let's say you were to, if you were had to make like a, if you had to train like an artificial intelligence on how to get directions from somewhere. Have you ever gone through the steps involved in getting said directions

and then vocalize them? I don't know, maybe mentally, but you know, what would be the first, I wanna walk through it with you because it's not a given I've found in all cases. What would be one of the first things you do. Probably look it up. If I want to get somewhere.

Yeah, yeah. So I would look it up on the internet. Yeah, yeah, look it up. Yeah, that'd be step one, look it up. Yeah, step two. Get an address. Well, yeah, maybe step two. Get an address.

But look the address up. You look the address up. Yeah, you look the address up. I mean, that's, you know, because we have smartphones and we have, you know, I can see it on the maps. Simple, obvious stuff. I just need the, I actually don't need anything more than just the address.

That's all I need. That's all I need. And then what do you do with the address? Even when I used a Thomas guide, that's all I needed. That was great. Just give me the, I know where I am. Yeah. I hope.

I love Thomas am. Yeah, I hope. I love time, I missed Thomas Guides. Yeah. Then you would do, you would get the address, you'd put it in a, put it in some kind of a direction, finding thing like the Google Maps, ways, whatever, whatever you want. Whatever you step three, punch it into the thing. Now what, at this, at this point, at this point,

you're done. Well, you see, I don't think, done. Well, I don't think so. And this is the key component that you take for granted, that I also took for granted. But I was mistaken in doing so. Check traffic. No, that's nice. It's nice to know traffic.

But you've kind of got one way to get there. Make sure. You could be one of these assholes that's always taking surface streets, causing accidents, or making everybody nervous, driving around. They don't know where the fuck they are. Or you just sit in traffic, you take a little bit of a loss. Make sure you have a car.

Make sure you have a car. Sure. Yeah. What's something else you might do right after you get that address when you type it in. You might, you might. Yeah. Put it into the computer and see where it is.

Oh, well, that's what I'm talking about on the phone. Yeah. I want to immediately, that goes into a map and maybe the best route. Take a look at it. Take a look at where you're going, right? You don't just put it in there and then blindly follow. Yeah, yeah. It tells you to go because then you could end up in the ocean or maybe you've met You don't just put it in there and then blindly follow. Yeah, yeah.

It tells you to go, because then you could end up in the ocean, or maybe you've had a typo, especially if you've been there before. Well, and that's the thing about knowing the area. Yeah, familiarize yourself with some of the things you're going to see. Because some people do, they just go, the map says, the map says, the map says, and it's like the map says. That's it. That's what you're trying, you're driving into a riot.

Maybe you should, you know, maybe not a train track. It's on train tracks. Yeah. 80s girl says, it must know that no trains are coming at this time. 80s girl gets to pick what we're doing for, what was it? Friday? Yeah, it was Friday, because she's got the week off

for school forever. So she wants to go out into the nature. Yeah. And sketch, sketch some things like a proper asshole and sit there with a sketch pad and sketch things. Okay. That's not, I like to sit on Twitter and call people idiots, whatever. Do what you do. And ask their hobby to relax. Okay. That's not, I like to sit on Twitter and call people idiots. Yeah. Whatever.

Everyone has their hobby to relax. She wants to, so she goes, yeah, I go here all the time. It's a San Bernardino, San Bernardino National Park. That's where we're going. I said, all right. And I knew it was, it's always a mistake. If you catch it at the right time of season, you can see meth trailers explode. Yeah. Yeah. So I say, all right. It's all, you catch it at the right time of season, you can see meth trailers explode. Yeah, yeah. So I say, all right, it's all, you got it, right? I'm gonna take care of some shit. I'm gonna take care of some work stuff

because this is gonna be a whole day of this crap, right? Right, I need to take care of some stuff here so I can be at peace with nature with you so we can take a nice relaxing day off, right? So you take care of it while I take care of work stuff, the directions and picnic shit, art supplies, stuff, whatever you need. I got it.

I will go, but I don't want to be responsible for it. I don't need to, I need to, I need to break from being responsible. That's the best part about you sitting on the couch playing Red Dead Redemption all day. Okay. It's no responsibilities, no, no chance of anything going completely wrong, catastrophically wrong.

Yeah. So we get in the car, I'm like, you got it on your phone, right? You get the directions. Yeah, going along. All right. We're on a weird freeway. Okay. Well, maybe, you know, going along. All right. We're on a weird freeway. Okay, well, maybe, you know,

maybe there's a shortcut, maybe traffic related, something like that. It says, all right, we're driving for about an hour. See, okay. You know, how long, how long till we get there? What, how long, she goes, oh, it's two miles. Mm-hmm. I can see the mountains.

They're about 15 miles away, 10, 15 miles away. Thank you. Well, not how long till the next thing we do, how long till we get there? It's two miles, it says two miles. It's okay. Automatically, you're starting to, I don't know, there's questions that are happening.

I didn't, I realized at this point. This is, don't see, right? I realized the missing part, you see, the part that you missed as well was look at where it is when you put it in. I just thought that was, thought it was something that automatically. Well, yeah, I mean, that's, I, because I see the start point in the end point and she says, no, well, it must be, it must be where you enter and, and then you get to go in and it's natural and wonderful. And then that's when you just kind of drive in

and get to pick. Possibly. Okay, I'm gonna go with a no on that one, but let's see how this develops. Sure enough, two miles away is the, in the middle of an industrial center, is the home offices of the national... Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha That is can be. Obviously, they have the week off. So nobody's there. Right.

Let's see the... Well, they got a nice cactus inside. See the map. Put your hands up, your pressur face to the window. Let's see the map. Let me see it. Is that a prick or a pair or a... Zoom in out, jumping Troy up or perhaps?

Zoom in out. Yeah. Right in the middle. It's all grids. The roads are all grids. Not even, there's not a, you have to zoom out with the fingers four times before there's any green on the map at all. What did you call it? The map says. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, the map says. So I won't be doing that. Okay. That's pretty great. That's pretty great. But then we can't, you know, I won't be doing that. Okay. That's pretty great.

That's pretty great. But then we can't, you know, I can't turn around at that point. So how far? So how far? I ended up driving four hours. No. Yeah, like two and a half.

Yeah, two each way. For this nice little, no, it's just a little trip into nature. Yeah. 30 minutes. No big deal. Uh-huh. Yeah. Nice and relaxing. Isn't nature relaxing? Yeah, it was very relaxing because as soon as that fuck up, the beautiful thing about the fuck up is it's open season for drinking at that point.

It's almost worth it. It's like, okay, well now we're having road sodas. This is turned into a debotch. Yeah. Thanks to this little blunder. Here was another, here was something else I found. This is Sean. Neuroscience pain can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. New brain imaging research shows that when we expect something to hurt, it does. And if the stimulus isn't so painful, surprisingly, those false expectations can persist

even when reality repeatedly demonstrates otherwise. This is reported in nature, human. So if we expect pain, the people who think they're allergic to light or just like that, yeah, or they're allergic to rays, you know what I mean? It annoys me because of how many women I know who just say, ow, all the time, no matter what. Like anything, if they drop a pen on their foot,

if they're putting in a seat belt, and they think that they drop a pen on their foot, if they're putting in a seat belt, and they think that they're gonna pinch themselves with it, and they just say, ow. You go, what's going on? What do you mean ow? And they say it like a fucking way to communicate for that. It's the offshoot of, it really is. It's either a gasp or an ow.

I know. And I finally have scientific proof that it's not actually hurting that they're making it hurt by expecting it to so they can give that fucking bark of owl every time. You're making a lot of sense today. Making a lot of sense today. Yeah. I had some more stuff on depression too, but I'd rather get to... Oh God, and the thought audit! Let me see if the Brainiac behind the thought audit is here.

Do you know what that's about? No. Oh, it's pretty funny. The thought audit? Yeah, all these Snapchat hose are getting reported now for having premium links and pay pals in their bios. They're getting reported to the IRS. Because they're making money.

Yeah. The thought it, the thought audit, thought it doesn't really work. Oh, thought like that hoe over there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how I thought. Yeah, okay. So there's a ton of chicks that just,

like they just, they just troll Instagram or Tinder or Twitter with links to like premium Snapchat pictures, just selling pictures of themselves, right? Like, yeah, sure. Selling software pornography. And I assume they'll talk to you or whatever. But then let me read you, let me read you some of these. These chicks. But then let me read you, let me read some of these. Uh, these chicks who are all exceptional individuals. Like you can imagine the kind of woman who does this and the relationship that they, that

they must have with their fans. Yeah. Uh, being, being, basically the manifestation of a cocktail. Yeah. Right. Right. being basically the manifestation of a cocktail. Yeah, right. Like having fake relationships with guys who are funding them to have a, they're like strippers.

They're like online strippers, essentially. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but okay, this is a good example of the kind of, this is a good example of the kind of posts this is a good example of the kind of posts that are getting reported. So here's this bitch posing in a bikini, right? In front of it. I need another loser-funded holiday.

Oh, nice. So this is their deal. And then they rake in donations and brag about how they get shit paid for. Yeah, and fuck those heat ears. Some, some hero, some wonderful hero figured out that if you report this to the IRS, you can get 10% of the ode of what's owed in taxes.

Oh, that's brilliant. Yeah. So now, so once, turning in your neighborhood, well, I mean, an enemy of my enemy. I hate the IRS, but I really fucking hate whip, right? Yeah. I hate getting taxed, but the IRS at least gives me a fighting chance. Women have been taxing me my whole fucking life. Yeah.

Well, women are attacks from God, and it's all what we all have to pay since the day we're fucking born. So, and it's always nice to see someone else get in trouble. Yeah, especially if you like it a little bit. I've been, you think you've got it rough getting free holidays? I am, I have been living the fucking Lafracurve for my entire life and I will until I'm fucking dead. Fuck you! Pay your share.

You don't like it? Stop voting for Democrats, you stupid thoughts. This is what it is. Yeah, that's cool. Make your money however you want. But if I have to pay taxes, you fucking better will too. Yeah, better believe you will too. Oh yeah.

Especially post-ignition. Yep. I need another loser funding holiday. And you know, they're loser funding holiday. Guilty, your honor. And then they're all bitching about, oh god, let me find some more, they're fucking, they're so funny. Uh...

and there's so funny. So it's really funny because I know that PayPal doesn't send you a 1099 until you make over 20 grand a year. So all of that income, I think it's all, I think it should all be a W2, whatever. If it's anything over 600 bucks, you have to report it. And obviously, if these breads are getting holidays paid for, then they're making more than that. Yeah.

It's great. I'm gonna start doing with everything. Yeah. You know, we have the technology. Sure. You got an expense tracker on your phone. Every dinner you take a girl out to, every Christmas present,

you buy every move that you take, just log it in your expense account, right? And send her a fucking 10.99 at the end of the year. Got a great time. You're, that's in your benefit, because it will take all year. You don't have to send her that shit until April. True.

And then you get to write it off. That's right. It's great. Well, it's, yeah, it's not taxable. Yeah. It's the beginning of, it's, yeah, it's not taxable. Yeah, it's never expensive. The beginning of the end for the thoughts here. The guy, so a guy wrote a program to crawl Twitter and look for women who have premium snapchats and like e-begging shit like that in their bio.

And then an army of these guys are reporting them to the IRS in the hope well not even didn't even think they care about the benefit. Yeah, but just to fuck just to fuck them over because it's such there's such awful cons most of the time. Uh, a guy by the name of CodeFag. That's the guy's name. I guess over a hundred thoughts just got reported to pay pal by it's very funny. I don't see how they have any defense for that. Pay your fucking taxes. It's income. Yeah.

You don't like it? Vote for the people who don't want there to be taxes pretty fucking simple Always talking about how sex work is real work. Yeah, all right. Yeah, that's real taxes if it's real vacation if it's real money a little bit Let's start doing that Christmas presents dates. I'm taking all right. Let go see, let's go see live action line king. I hate everyone in it and I don't wanna see it, but let's go and then we'll just leave halfway through. And the other half was taxes.

There you go. I got a, I'm sending the second half to Uncle Sam. And I just found some dirty stuff, but all right, all right, all right, let's play some. I think Peach is on the phone. Oh good. Peach and Denzel are still fighting. They are?

Yeah. But they made some kind of peace. Me too, but apparently they didn't. Denzel is right. When will he call in? He won't. Why not? He says he's done with the show.

Why? What are we doing? Man, I don't know. He got, he posted a, oh, kind of a weird, like a paragraph long. Is it was something we were talking about? I don't know.

He said something happened to him personally. He's talking about getting docs or something, but he had words for peach and he posted a segment of a private conversation that I don't think he's doing him any favors by posting it. It doesn't look good. I told him a call in but he said no. He's done with it, he's over it. He's been posting a lot It doesn't look good. I told him a call in, but he said, no. He's done with it.

He's over it. He's been posting a lot of shit about Trump though. Yeah, I think maybe that the whole, the Trump derangement syndrome, maybe got a hold of him a little bit. I don't know. Yeah, just affecting a lot of people. They just can't, they hear Trump and they can't think straight.

Don't worry, Trump will be gone soon, you know. Go, he can be gone in six years. Well, everything be back to normal. He's not going to get most of the shit that he wants done. Don't worry. Well, they never do. Never do. Yeah. A lot of people, it's just funny. Maybe he'll get the wall done. You don't like to just go to Mexico, start giving away ladders. No big deal. Do you, you know, do your part? You don't like the fucking wall.

Give it away ladders. Ladders. Oh ladders. Yeah, it's the lighters. I was like, no, no. Okay, here's wales. Visi G. Whale.

Fucking this is that show in the universe, I'm Maddox. Here's some sounds that I can. Great artwork. Yeah. Yeah. Oh. Here's some sounds that I've great artwork. Yeah If I could go back to the day we met I probably would just stay in bed I run my mouth all over town and still can't get your shots it down on bicycles like my range Rover Take it back or bitch like this. I'll do it

I would sense a fuck my ex behind song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. I like this song, dirty. heard a little song for you It goes like Wait me for so Fuck down down with you So fucking dumb we're all with pain And pay that you're brought to feel Sure

So then check some please don't count as soon Just kinda all over the place Yeah I'm not fucking worth the volume. No, I know. All right. It's too all over the place. I can't I can't finish it. Sorry buddy. Um, get peach on. Big dick says it sounds sounds terrible. Hey peach you there. Simple to the point. Yeah. Yeah, can you hear me? Yeah, hey, what's going on? Hey, why does Denzel hate you? I don't know. What is all this? What is all this, man?

I'm sorry, can you eat that? Why does Denzel hate you? What did you do? What did you do to him? I do. I don't know. So last night, I made him quit the show. I'm gonna go energy him, not feeling well, huh?

You made him quit the show, I guess. I guess somehow I must have. So I got a message from Water Boy that's like, hey, you should take a look at this. And I'm like, and I saw a thread on Reddit being like that he, I guess, mentioned that the reason he's not coming on the show anymore was because he got doxed or something

due to whatever happened between us. Like, what was it last year? Around April or March or something. And I felt terrible. I was like, oh my God, what like April or March or something. Yeah. And, and I felt terrible. I was like, oh my God, what happened? I had no idea. I don't know if you knew. I doubt it.

I don't know. So I thought I thought it would be prudent to reach out because if it was it's great. People don't tell me anything because they know I'm just going to talk about on the show. That's true. Perfect. Right.

So I thought it would be if I were somehow even tangentially involved, I should probably check it. Like, what's the deal? So I, that's your mistake. You should never check in. Just leave it alone. I thought that would be the nice thing to do because the last, the last time he and I talked, he apologized to me, which I thought was very nice. And I was, and he didn't have to do that. And I thought that that's what I do next time in San Diego. I, next time I'm in San Diego, like I'll buy you, I'll buy you a brew. That's great. And, and I think he even liked it. And I thought it was settled. So I thought, in my mind, I figured we were cool to do me one another. I thought, so I, I very quickly sent him like a, you know, hey, how you

doing. And he sent me something that I thought was civil back. So I wrote him like a, I thought, so I very quickly sent him like a, you know, hey, how you doing? And he sent me something that I thought was civil back. So I wrote him like a, I thought was kind of an encouraging message. And then he got angry. And then I wrote him like a, whoa, what's going on here? And then he, and the part he posted, which was him being like, I'm not mad, but here's how not mad I am. Do you want to hear it? A big long chun.

I mean, yeah. I'm, yeah. Yeah. Because he's not mad I am. A big long-tron. I mean, yeah. I'm, yeah. Because he's not, I liked Denzel, but he's not calling in anymore forever. Yeah. This is his side. Hopefully, as it changed our heart, I know, I thought you guys got all past all that. He's got 100th episode coming up on Real Nerd Hour's next week. Well, no, if you know that, but you know, I don't.

But Real Nerd Hour's checked out there 100th episode, even though he's not calling in anymore. Here was the one. Here's what he posted. This is what he sent you apparently, Peach. You're the one that hit me up to ask me why people are saying you had someone dox me. You can pretend like you were reaching out on some are you okay buddy stuff, but we both know that's not why you are. That's odd. Yeah, that's what Peach always reaches out. I know that's way too much. Peach is always like, is there a problem? Is there, is there, did I do something? Well, I was, I just, in my brain, I'm like, well,

if I can somehow help like directly like, hey, I hear there's a problem, is there any way I can make things better right now? I believe her with that. Yeah, you can help build a wall. You can get a, we both know why you are. We're not cool.

I don't like you. You've never given me a reason to, I mean, she's got two reasons to, but you've given me plenty of reasons to not. You went real, you went, you for real went after me for days on end. Um, I guess that's true, but it's just shit talking. You told people that I was mocking your lupus or something. Water boy, the person who did the theme on my podcast reached out

to tell me how much of a piece of shit I was for something that I didn't do. Three patrons left. Because of what you said, I was doing to that I didn't do. Three patrons left. Because of what you said, I was doing to you. These are the relationships I'm referencing. As an aside to reiterate, I don't believe you had anything to do. I don't believe Peach would ever instruct anyone to dox anyone. Oh, please.

I don't even have to. I lost my place. I don't believe you had anything to do with to dox anyone. Oh, please. I don't even have to. Never. I should, I lost my place. I don't believe you had anything to do with my doxing. You didn't. Okay, so you acknowledge that. Well, you can go buy your real name, buddy. What are you saying?

Ultimately, I'm not mad about it anymore. I'm not mad at you either. Being mad won't undo any of what was done. Jesus, what was done? I learned that something important, I should be more careful with who I associate with and I don't have to force myself to try to get along with people.

I no longer need to hold on to the pretense that we should or could have a working relationship. I'm done with TDS. They'll be fine without me and have a great time probably because of it. What the hell? No, we have a better time with him as part of the,

what the fuck happened? Everybody who calls in and is like a regular part, we have a better time with him as part of the ourselves. What the fuck? Everybody who calls in and is like a regular part, we have a better time with. I mean, it's like it's just another interesting person. I need to emphasize that I don't like you. I mean, of course he's going to get a big response back. Right? You can't tell a woman I don't like you and they're not going to walk away from that, right, Peach? I don't know. Well, I mean, it just, I don't understand where his animosity is coming from. Like, everything was completely fine. And if there had been an issue, I wish he would have just come to

me and been like, either, hey, are you doxing me or hey, can, can you, but he, everything was just out in the open. I don't know what he's, I'm just very confused by his, is this just recent? His words, I, this morning. Oh, this was last night. This was last night around midnight. I need to emphasize that I don't like you,

but with that said, I have the decency to leave you the fuck alone and I ask that you do the same. But it's the fucking internet. What are you talking about? In reference to the working relationship, I'm talking about you and I. All right, here's, here's,

do you want me to read your report, Peach? Low, holy shit, you're a liar and a massive pussy. Take responsibility for yourself, you big baby. I'm not this weird villain you paint me as. I genuinely was confused and concerned as to what happened, But now you've informed me you just need a diaper change. Oh, it's a peach. I mean, what do you say to that? Well, remember, yeah, peach is a great

writer. Yeah, it's very funny. And wow, I'll try to get over this fat, lonely loser not liking me. Oh, geez. I mean, it probably did sting. Peach, Denzel saying, I don't like you. I think you should know that I hate you. Oh, all right. Somehow, somehow I will find a way laughing crying, like the cooking the crooked laughing crying face that's the ultimate chick's yeah, yeah, the crooked one.

Best of last part. Best of luck out there. Do you want me to say this word that you call them? Oh slugger. Oh, but slugger. It's a dog whistle. Yeah, it is. It is.

Oh, no, no, no, no. Best of luck out there slugger. Chin up slugger. Yeah, I don't mean that. Yeah. So, oh, what a what a shitty way toers. Shut up sluggers. Yeah. I mean, what about, yeah. So, what a, what a shitty way to end it. I always wanted to start to sweetie, but I thought that would have been too mean. It is too mean.

I fucking hate it. They do that. I just sluggered. I just sluggered. Oh, y'all fucking show you a slugger, you bitch. Well, here's, oh yeah, right. So, yeah, please. So what's interesting is that I, he only posted that last bit, but we actually had what I thought initially was a really nice interaction at first.

And I was very nice. I was like, what's going on? I mean, I'll read you what I have. No, I know. I know how you send emails. You're fine. Well, no, he cut it in such a way that makes me look like like I'm so mean, but he actually ended Making himself like he's got I feel I feel like he's sent you a I mean he sent you a What looks to be like a 20 line message? No Never send a woman a 20 no three, four lines, tops. I'm talking of three, four words, tops.

I don't like you, period. That's it. You don't need any more than that. Any more than that is the map. Please check the fucking map. Did you check the map? Did you check where the end of the map is? Where were the destination part?

Well, if he had just sent me, like, look, I don't like you buzz off, I would've been like, all right, well, you know, but. Hey, what do you think about the thought apocalypse that's going on, thought audit, audit, thought. Is that to do with the IRS stuff? Yeah, are you paying taxes? Are you gonna get thought audited?

No, because I don't do that kind of stuff, but it's like, if they're doing something illegal and they should be paying taxes, then yeah, then they should be paying their taxes, I guess. Yeah, they should be paying double taxes. Fuck an A, in fact, because I got two of them. One for each tit. Yeah, yeah. All right.

All right, I'm going to read some, well, I have stenzel to call in, but he didn't want to. Yeah. Because he's done with it. Well, hopefully changes his mind. Me too. I do too. I feel bad. I would still buy him a beer. I don't want to. Yeah. Because he's done with it. Well, I hope it changes his mind. Me too. I do too. I feel bad. I would still buy him a beer.

I don't understand what's happening. Why would you, yeah, and you don't know what, you don't know what he's referring to though. I mean, why would you really suddenly understand? Why would you do that? Why would you what?

Why would you shun peach like that? Like just don't say anything. You don't like her. She's still nice. Yeah. Like what's the point? It's it's always funny for me how two people who, you know, and I feel like I know Peach better than Denzel because, you know, all of us have traveled together and hung out for days on end and stuff like that. But I really can't see I don't see how either one of them gets in a pissing match really like with each other.

Trump should tell him, man, it's Trump shit. Brother against brother. I don't think you guys have had a, you guys don't even have political discussions, do you? No, I don't even know what his politics really are. He doesn't know mine. I have no idea what his problem is. I genuinely am so confused by the interaction now and the interaction last year. I don't get it.

I mean, if you're going to post, if you're going to post private messages, at least post the ones where you had the last word, right? Yeah. Not with somebody else. I mean, take a, take a, you know, a, a point for George and post your highlight real. Yeah. Not, not this. Yeah.

I'll punch it up a little bit. Yeah. And so what do you do in me? Stop what you're doing. Yeah. All right. Peace, you want to help me give some advice to people? Sure.

Got some advice questions here. Comments. Did you, bro, is a pedophile? Why, why give him a platform? This is Reddit, concern, trolling again. Why is Dick giving did you grow a platform when he came on the show and says he likes animated little girl pornography? Keep this fucking peto off the show. I skipped this whole segment. Love you, Dick, but I would appreciate it if you kept to the Christopher Wiki-esque degenerates, not pedophiles. You know, I didn't even realize that that was digi- I forget there's so many guests on this show.

I forget who they are. I forgot it was Digi Bro. I forgot that it was Digi Bro until after. I think when I was mixing, maybe I was like, oh wait, was that the guy? Yeah. Why give him a platform, Sean? Why give him a platform? I would give a fucking actual pedophile a platform.

What is this platform shit? Enter. When did men start considering attention to be a currency more valuable than actual than money? They can't give him platform. You can't give that guy a platform. Why? What is so, are you jealous?

What the fuck is the problem? Because if you give a pedophile a platform, he will get a bunch of high school kids to start smoking. Yeah, that's the problem. Comes back to that. Give him a platform. I'm so sick of the platform, shit. Why would you give, why would you,

why would you have, well, I mean, it always just happened to me, but it's the same thing with Milo and Gavin. Why would you give those guys platform? You know, I actually recently, I haven't even told you this, Dick. I got in trouble really very recently because I just went on the kill stream and spoke with you and Ralph about like pants shitting and farting and stuff. Just because of that, I have a large group of people have been attacking me and my boyfriend,

calling us like actual for real Nazi recruiter. She is. That's stuff. And I'm like, why? And they're like, well, you associate with Ralph and Dick. And I'm like, well, yeah, Dick's my buddy and Ralph was the host. And they just really went at me.

And I can't wrap my mind around the fact that because I speak to someone, I automatically share. They're like, yeah. Yeah, every decision you've ever made, I now fully endorse, I guess. I don't know. Dick is no longer a Nazi, so just everybody knows. Yeah, I'm sorry, I just wanted to.

I mean, he might have been when you spoke to him, but I'm sorry to want to be one just to piss people off. Maybe that's how it got started. If you're going to be painted with that brush, then, you know, yeah, why not? Clearly, it clearly rubs all the right people the wrong way. So I just, I don't understand. They, it's like they think that conservatism is akin to, like, or not, is akin to a zombieism where if they, if they look at you or bite, you

or touch you, you, you now have those beliefs or thoughts, I don't know. They're infected, need a colony, send all of it. You own colony, like leprosy. Right. This is, I don't know if I should read this guy's name. Hey, Dick, if you read, oh, thank God, if you bring this on the podcast, don't use my real name. Just call me Christopher.

We got too many Christopher's though. Yeah. So I'm 19 years old and I'm going to community college before transferring to a university for engineering. My problem is I've been in a relationship for two years with this nine out of 10 babe. 17 to 19, huh? Cans are about mangoes on 120 pound woman.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. She recently broke up with me wanting us to go separate ways in life. That sucks. However, both of our lives are boring since all we do is work and go to the same college. So because of this, we spend a couple of nights a week together and have sex often.

Doesn't, all right. That sounds like you're doing pretty well. Hey, yeah, what are you complaining about? I should be asking you why are you calling in? have sex often. Doesn't. All right. I think you're doing pretty well. Yeah. What are you complaining about? Let's see where this goes. Why are you calling in? Yeah. You got out of a relationship, but you kept banging her?

Because they're bored. I would be okay with this. However, one of the huge problems during our relationship is that she only has other guys as friends because she's an attention-horror. Well, they all want to fuck her. Yeah. Yeah. his friends because she's an attention-horrent. Well, they all want a fucker. And she's, yeah, right. And you make the age-old young man mistake of arguing with a woman who you think doesn't understand your point, who you think is speaking to you with a single ounce of sincerity.

And she knows exactly what she's doing there. And the more you try try you more you exhaust yourself Spitting words at her like a fucking ATM the more she thinks you're a huge pain in the ass. Yeah Giving her exactly what she fucking wants drama drama drama I would be okay with this however one of the huge problems during our relationship is that she only has other guys as friends and Most times she would most times she would hang out with them, it would cause me to have a panic attack. Well, now you're not in a relationship. It sounds like he wants to be just from what you've read so far.

It sounds like he still wants to be. And it's always been a, yeah. Get rid of that. You're going to get rid of that. Now that we aren't together, but I clearly still have feelings for her. She can just go out and be with whoever she wants, which causes me more stress than when we were together. Yeah, but she's choosing to still,

she's choosing to still fuck you. That oughta be, you know, you oughta feel pretty good about yourself. Yes, she doesn't want to be. What's the question? You can't, he doesn't know what his question is. He's like, hey, he's gonna have to fuck. This is body, body, body, body, body, body, body, body.

Yeah, you can't turn a hoe into a housewife. This is a hoe. You have a great, you have a great fuck body that you will tire of. You will tire of this, the said, who will never be any better than this. She is never going to be any better than this, never, never, never, never. And keep telling yourself until you realize that she wants to fuck you, congratulate you,

fucking lations, any guy in the world would trade places with you for a couple of weeks and then get sick of her because they know who she is. Yeah, no, you've got that in the bag. Now you can do other stuff too. You could do whatever you want. It's like having your cake and eating it too. You don't have to listen to a shit. You don't have to buy her.

Christmas present, you don't have to buy her. Birthday present. You have to have dinner with her. Fucking parents. You have got to this. You've got to look at this positively. You don't, when she says something's banging around in her car, you don't even have to think about it.

No, you don't have to listen to any fucking. Some day, any fucking fucking any rambling. Nothing. Somebody else's problem. You've, you've, yeah, go ahead. We know that she's sleeping with all these other dudes. Do we, do we know for a fact that she is sleeping with him? It is.

Just assume she is in fucking use. What a protection. Yeah, for sure, definitely use protection, but do we, do we, like, is, is she indeed a hoe? Like is she indeed sleeping with all these dudes? or is she still just sleeping with this guy? Well, she'd be a slut. I think I'm not sure she was taking money, right? Oh, gee.

Call the IRS on her. That's what you got to do. Yeah. Hold on. Let's see. Yeah. I'm just totally fond of how much money you spend on her and then call a fucking IRS. Peach would have mattered if she's, if she's having sex with all these other man, man friends of hers.

Well, yeah, because then that would indeed, I suppose, make her a ho, I suppose, but a bit of a, if she's still only sleeping with him, then she's just has these other dude friends, but I don't know. I mean, I get, I get from there. Yeah, I get it. I don't know. She's going to get to a drunk one day. Maybe her interests are male or maybe, I don't know, maybe she's in a male oriented field.

I don't know. Oh, those in a male oriented field. I don't know. Oh, those are the questions I'm asking though. Like, what do you mean? You think she's a twitch streamer? Something like that? No, I don't know. It's like, like, is like, why does she have these male friends and is she sleeping with them?

I don't know. I just think the context would be important. She's setting it up so she could at any moment. Oh, probably. No, that's a good point. Friday, I'm basically stuck working most days every week, including Friday and Saturday. And I won't be able to transfer to a university for a couple of years. I feel like I'm stuck here.

And being that way will never, never want me to move on from what I'm comfortable with. Finances are a problem like any other 19-year-old who's in drown. Well, they're about to get better. They're about to get a lot better. I also can't work less because I need to make enough money to pay bills. One thing to note is that we were both each other's first time. So there is a connection sexually to her

that I wouldn't be able to go. I can't believe I just read that. Yeah. From a man, there's a connection sexually to her that I wouldn't be able to get back with someone else because you wouldn't have lost your virginity to them. Dude, dude, no fuck that. I lost my virginity to my hand.

I'm not gonna be with her for the rest of my life. If not, some woman didn't take it from me. I lost my virginity to my mom. That was in there first. Jesus. That was the good out there. Yeah, no, that's the context I needed. Get out. Oh, God. He'll think differently.

Look at what Denzel did. Say nothing. Just say nothing and take what you get, which is a little chicky, little 19 year old chick with mangoes and 120 pound woman. My heart is shit. Who wants to fuck you before you move on and do other shit? Yep.

Before you move on, don't say anything! That little voice in your head that your mom telling you this shit! You gotta listen to the dad voice on the other side, who is always surprisingly silent! Um, yes. Yeah, I don't know what his question is. Move on, man. Get out of there. Do not know! Do nothing.

Nothing. Do nothing and take what you get. Do nothing. She wants to come over. Yes, sure. Come on over. You see another girl? Ask her out. Another girl is a fuck. Go fuck her. Do nothing. She wants to come over. Yes, sure. Come on over. You see another girl? Ask her out. Another girl wants to fuck.

Go fuck her. Do nothing. Do nothing. Come back to Chicago for road rage because my buddy started listening to you after you road rage Chicago which I missed my opportunity to go. Either that or come to Wisconsin.

All right, you got it. Um, see, here's another one. Can we please go back to Chicago? Yeah. Oh yeah. That was fun. Good. Good. Uh, let's see, here's another one.

I'm a virgin, kissless and scared. I'm a virgin, kissless and scared shitless. So I might be thinking too far ahead, but I'd like your advice for introducing fetish shit. Okay. And to the relationship. A virgin. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait it up to vanilla stuff anymore. Ooh, I don't want to bring up stuff like being dominated or cross-dressing too early and seem like a weirdo.

Well this is too early. Yeah. Pre-relationship is probably too early. Pre-kiss. Yeah. You got to let him, you know, you always got to let him know before the first case, if you don't have everything on the table. Right.

That's deceptive. I don't want to bring up stuff like being dominated or cross-dressing too early and seem like a weirdo. But I also don't want to get too far into a relationship only to find that she's turned off by my turn-ons. You are worried about a lot of hypotheticals. I understand that. I understand that. I understand that. I wanted to control.

It's not me who understand that. Don't for sure. I mean, black venecks is not all I have. It's all like out of the house with. Usually you look like RuPaul. Yeah, oh yeah. That's why everybody asks why you're always only wearing black venecks. The only man clothes you have.

Right. Otherwise you're a sh wearing black. Me and that's the only man clothes you have. Right. Otherwise you're a shajan. Exactly. Yes. I also don't want to get too far into a relationship only to find she's turned off by my turn on's and have my big fantasies stay unfulfilled. Dude, aren't there like groups for this shit cross dress? No, for everything. What do you mean?

On the internet, get around a bunch of freaks like yourself. Right? No, I mean, like, that's good, right? No, why not? There's like forums and stuff that's pretty fine. Does that work? What I'm saying, if, no, like actual meetups and stuff, like, if you're like, you sure there's gotta be,

like, you know, if they're not fulfilled, try, you know, you get a relationship. I have been so- I like it. Like, no, here's what, you know what those meetups, I think you're talking about. Yeah, what are going to be- I've been done tonight. It's going to be a bunch of guys. Oh.

That's what it is. It's going to be a bunch of guys, it's going to be 20 guys and one chick who's a total bitch and has mental power. That's getting me crazy. Yeah. There are dating sites and stuff where this person could probably go and and it's assumed that that's got some kind of weird or not weird, just different fetish-y type thing that they can.

Peach, dating sites are totally worthless for men. Only guys like Sean can get dates on dating sites. I mean, this is just a fixed fetish thing. So I mean, I'm here, thick fetish thing. So, I mean, out here, buddy. Let me help you out. Any girl would be into this stupid shit. They're turned on by anything. They're literally turned on by anything.

You hook their brains up to an MRI. You show guys fucking, you show chicks fucking, you show gingerbread men fucking, they're turned on by all of it. Anything having to do with sex. No, Peach. Dick, I'm so sorry. I have to intervene. Yeah, no, we're not turned about. It depends on the woman. So I think if you have an intimate

connection with a woman emotionally, it is my life. They're just women on. She should try out everything on here. Jesus, I'm sure she would try anything with someone she cared about, but I don't know. I don't think we're turned on my absolutely everything. I don't know if that's entirely true, darling. But I don't know. Virgin caseless and scared should look. That's not a poor thing.

Yeah, I see here. You're gonna do that more. I'm just talking to you. How are you? Very good. You want to do one more? I'm just talking to you. How are you? Very good. You wanna do one more, Sean? Yeah. All right, Andy.

Let me see, maybe I wasn't supposed to say his name. Andy! Then I got a tie. Then agent, I think Agent Dickhead is here, but I don't see him. Blair is on here. Agent Dickhead. Oh yeah, Agent Dickhead, right.

If you guys are, if you're in there and I told you to call in, please post, type something into the general chat so I can see, because I don't know what your names are a lot of times. Andy Fanta the show, here coming to you with a question, me and my girlfriend have been together for a while, two years, moved in together recently. Most of the time I've known her, she's been working a shitty retail job, but has been trying to find new unemployment. The issue with that is while she has tried to take a class to get some cert or some bullshit,

she basically stopped trying and never finished. This has made her basically just stop, and you think this guy's Mexican? That's three basically, so far. I don't know. Basically just stop any attempt to try and better herself, even so much that I've even said I will not only pay for the classes, but cover more than my share of the rent if she devotes her time to getting her shit together.

She just doesn't want to. Call the IRS. That's what you do. If a chick's giving you a problem, you call the IRS immediately. You take a girl to dinner, she doesn't put out IRS. You let the professionals handle it. You let the government... Don't take the law into your own hands. You take the IRS.

Don't take thoughts into your own hands. Bitch, that meal was 35 bucks. Boop, boop, boop, boop. IRS, yeah. We'll send someone right over. I'd like to report unclaimed wages in the form of the Blooming Onion. Half of the Blooming Onion. That's tax, that's fucking taxable. There you go.

You can only write off half of that. I've even told her she's not going to get anywhere because retail management qualification she has with only high school. What are you, fucking guidance counselor? Under belt is basically worthless outside retail. This is even worse than she went from a kind of chubby, cute girl to a ham planet. Oh my ham planet. What a great term.

Oh. All right, buddy, you duped me. Hi, Marks for you. This was, all of this stuff doesn't matter. Yeah. All the stuff at the top that you've sandwiched in. She went from a kind of chubby, cute brown girl to a hand planet as she just binge eats garbage and sugar and won't join me in the gym.

I guess what I'm trying to say is what can I do to get, to either get her off her ass and fix herself or do I just pack up and leave? Baffelicia. Issue with the latter is we're both on the lease, and if anything, I would kick her out, but I'm not sure she would leave without a legal batter, that battle. Oh my God. To top it off, I think at my best, I'm a six out of 10.

I'm basically socially retarded at the point where obvious cues, a girl is interested in me. I'm oblivious, so I just squirrel money away and disappear. So do I just squirrel money away and disappear? Do I try to either hope she comes out better or schedule to rent a forklift from Home Depot? Oh my God, to get her out of my place. Wow.

Well, I gave some tips on how to make your girlfriend lose weight a couple episodes ago. Yeah. Just throw her keys down the street every day. If I think I have a suggestion, if you make it like you, you're going to do those cute couple workouts like you see on Instagram, chicks, chicks love that shit. So if you're like, hey, we should do that kind of couple, you know, time spending bullshit time together.

They love that. I think that'd be a great way to get her to workout. Yeah, they like that. Like, you know what? Pettin' a dog, cardio. Yeah, you get a dog, and a dog, you pet it, and get her to pet the dog, but run with it. So she has to run, pitch can't resist that, right?

I mean, you're not run there. You know what, it sounds like she needs an eating disorder. Just cheat on her. She can't leave, she's legally stuck there. She'll get so in her head that she won't be able to eat and full of self-loathing, right? Yeah, the eating will stop. Well, she goes to the salt.

She goes to like sit on your lap or anything, just go like, whoa! You know? They're one of those, you know those little things that babies have, the little wooden blocks that you turn over and they make farm sounds? Get a cow one of those and when you turn over and they make farm sounds, get a cow one of those and when you turn over, you know, have one around all times in the house or

maybe an app on your phone and whenever she does sits on anything go, ah, turn it over. Yeah. No, no, I think you were going somewhere with a dog. I say have him get a dog, which that would be great anyway. And then have both of you jog with the fucking dog. That's great. No, don't get a dog. Go to like some kind of him. You see how this women, they can't turn it off. They're always trying to fuck you. Get a dog. Get a dog. Yeah, but you know what? Go pet dog. Get her pregnant. That'll work too.

Then she'll then she'll really work it off. Peach. Get her a fucking dog. Get out of here. All right, they're in Benji with a dog. I don't know the dog will be fat. You have a fat dog. Okay, Peach. Does anything make you rage? Who me? Yeah, you oh God, well as I was saying earlier just that that I mean you nailed it the Oh God. Well, as I was saying earlier, just that that I mean you nailed it the platforming thing where it because I spoke to Ralph about pants shitting and you I suppose I'm now being branded as this monster and and it's it's just bullshit I'm allowed to speak to people and enjoy their company and if I find out they have

Opinions that are different from mine later. That's something else, you know. But I think that- Would it be easier to rebrand the Nazi meme or do we have to keep denying it until we're dead? I have no idea. Cause I think with a little tweak, you know, like remember Jack in the box, when that E. coli happened, then it killed a bunch of people, and they brought Jack, Jack, and everybody forgot.

Like, oh yeah, they didn't kill anybody. That was other guys, the puppets guys here's back, he fixed them all up. What if Denazzi did something like that? No, God. Like they bring back some kind of a puppet, right? Okay. Like a puppet comes back and he's like, hey, I'm the real, like trying to have the dog.

Like, hey, that other guy was an imposter. Yeah, I'm here. And now that I got my country back. Now that I got my country back, now that I got my country back, I'm here to make a few changes. None of that old stuff. None of that old stuff about Jews. That's that's stupid. No, that's dumb. Jews are friends, not food. All right. Yeah. Bring them. Get it back. Muslims on the other hand. Fucking called a Nazi, I guess. Yeah. Yeah, it's weird. All right, Peach. Thanks for coming in.

Sorry that Den's all doesn't like you. Thank you. That's okay. I like you guys. I'll see you later. See you later. Bye. Bye, guys.

Bye. Hey Sean, how about those guitar parts that you were going to send me? Oh, shit. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I'll send them over to you. Yeah, how about that? Um, a Vora file sent me a. A Vora file? It'sorefile sent me a...

A vorefile? It's pretty long. That's a name. Yeah, somebody who gets off on eating people. Remember I said last episode of eating people like a necrophile right in. Yeah, there was, I can remember a guy in Japan. He's out.

Somehow he either didn't go to prison or whatever, but I think he was traveling abroad and he put an ad out and a guy agreed to let this Japanese guy eat his dick. Eat his dick? Yeah. Yeah, his dick and balls, I think. Oh!

And what order? I don't know, but they did it. I think the other guy died of like shock or sepsis or something like that. The guy that got his dick chopped off for food. Yeah, and they did, they did. I think both of them ate part of it. And this guy is now like, he's kind of a weird celebrity in Japan.

He's still alive and he's like written books and stuff like that. But he has that, yeah. A guy got his own dick. He wants to eat his own dick. No, no, no, no, no, no. He ate the other guy's dick. He found the guy online and, yeah, and they were like,

we're working on vapes. We've got guys eating each other's dicks out there. Yeah. Man, some of them know what I'm talking about. Speaking of Japan, I had a news bae lined up in Japan with a humongous rack. Really? The fucking time, it was 5 a.m. for,

yeah, yeah, time to record. Yeah. So my dreams were dashed. Yeah. Peach get a dog. That's why I'm in solution to everything. Get a dog. I didn't pay my taxes for the last six years. I ain't get a dog. That's women's solution to everything. Get a dog. I didn't pay my taxes for the last six years.

I ain't get a dog. Hmm, okay. I'll read this for a file. One. Okay, cool. Again, no names on the air if you read this. I keep this shit a secret for good reason. Yeah.

Trim it down if you need to. The email's gonna be weird, but hopefully in a fun way. First for those Sean who don't know, he has, he says that here, voraphilia, just called vor is a fetish where I'm aroused by the idea of me or whoever, being swallowed whole and alive. This is because I asked a Necrophile to write it. To this different. I do not like the idea of prey being cooked

or being torn apart by a pack of wolves or a real life cannibalism of any kind. Got it. This fetish is restricted to fantasy, both by morals and of course, by simple reality. From what I understand, snakes won't eat someone alive and whale throats are so small you'd be crushed before you made it to the stomach. At least that's how I like it, which I'll get into later.

All right. To start, I'll second both the feeding guy and the one-of-be-fatist woman's idea that these fetishes are probably started at an early age due to consuming some kind of media. The way I understand it is that if you're looking at something in your formative years when your brain is beginning to develop the part that tells your dick what's sexy, some wires will get crossed and you'll find whatever that is to be sexy. Could that be true? I mean, can you not watch Willy Wonka with your kids because they might want to fuck a blueberry?

I don't know. I don't know. Did you not watch Pinocchio as a kid? Because then you're going to want to get swallowed by a whale like this guy and fuck a whale? Or a puppet? What do you even start? I don't know.

I'm more worried about that than vapes. Yeah, I think it's so complex. For me, I distinctly remember a lot of vorusch media with cartoons seeming to put it everywhere you look. I'm even really. I don't remember that shit. People being swallowed alive. I'm even convinced the animator of Rugrats

was a sick vor fuck with the amount of episodes that started out being shot from the inside of a baby's mouth. Huh, there was also that scene in Dude, where's my car, where the giant sexy chick in a bikini swallows someone whole? I do remember that. I also remember that the aliens gave their girlfriend's

huge tits at the end of that movie to thank them. Yeah. I also really, really loved dinosaurs due to Jurassic Park. And I thought the idea of being swallowed whole by a T-Rex is just straight up sexy to me. Wow. Shot. He's in Jurassic Park beating off to the T-Rex, getting the lawyer, biting the lawyer, and

then tipping his throat back like a shot, right? Wow. The guy's in there. That guy's in there. That guy's thinking about that later. There's people in that theater going, oh, I can't wait to get home and beat off to this. Like, you're going to that movie and go, oh, wow, they put some stuff in for me.

Yeah. However, no matter how much I've tried to wrap my head around my fetish with logic, such as dumb subfactors, sub-dom factors, a desire for excessive intimacy, weird mom attachment shit, I always remember I have no control over nor feel a real explanation for what my dick wants. I look at Vore, my dick gets hard, that's the best explanation I can give. Well, there you go. Yeah. I think you could do better.

I think you could have a better explanation than that. I mean, just for, you know, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know if you can. Just for fun. Just for fun. Just for fun. Yeah.

For a very long time, I thought everyone was into it. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Yeah. Who doesn't like blowjob? I'm surprised by that statement that like everyone was into it. You got to, you would think you would see much more of it, or maybe he's reading a lot of things into, I can think of cartoons as a kid where somebody ends up like running into the other person's mouth or like a shark. It's like Tom from Tom and Jerry or something. He goes into a shark and you see the outline of him. The tailings gotta run out.

Flings out. Yeah. So he's in there thinking, oh, they put that in because of it's. Oh, I don't know, maybe. Yeah. For a long time, I thought everyone was into it. I mean, that'd be super, like if I'm watching American

gladiators as a kid, thinking everyone's into it. And then I am 14 and find out that I'm oh, so I'm kind of fucking weirdo. Yeah. After all, who doesn't like blow jobs? And what is being swallowed whole by a giant, beautiful woman, if not really, just a really good blow job?

That of course turned out not to be the case. And for my experience, I figured you either like it or you don't, there's no real way to turn anyone into enjoying it. Ellie is not different. That's all right. The guy that was worried about cross dressing, this is what you're up against.

Yeah. Look, if you're into cross dressing, it just means more clothes for her. Of course, she's gonna be into that. It's more money. Yeah. I'll explain to my personal experience. Just try to find a girl who's about your size.

Right, right? You could go shopping together, wear the same clothes. Yeah. She could try her outfits on you. You gotta just learn how to sell it. I'll explain that my personal experience isn't as crazy as the feeding guy. I can get off without thinking of VOR in some kind of context, but it is absolutely my favorite thing to jerk off to.

I'm very thankful this is the case as for it is a fetish that is 100% unable to be fulfilled in real life. Yeah. Is it? I guess so. Well, I mean, what do you get? Yeah. Do you think is this guy down at like the car dealership when they got that big gorilla

out for the sales, trying to climb in his mouth like you're driving by that? I wish I could climb in that guest room. However, due to this, any and all content is restricted to hen-tie at best and first shit at worst. But the need for fresh content was so strong, it forced me into becoming a furry against my will. Oh, terrible.

I'm sure you have discovered, I'm sure you have discovered something I'm sure you have discovered something similar in your descent into depravity. I've seen everything. Thank God, I only like women with, well, that's super looking faces with huge tits. Thank God for that. That's easy to find.

Well, that's the thing, that's what would suck about having a very specific fetish where their content has gotta be very, very low. Yeah. Now the weird thing is that there are so many stupid subdivisions in the vore fetish that there are huge amounts of sickos. Oh, they're deluding as precious vore. Don't like what I like.

Yeah. But instead like drastically other things that everyone covers in the blanket umbrella of vore. Fucking. Fingers. Fingers such as ad pauses for Sean's reaction and make sure he doesn't vomit anal other things that everyone covers in the blanket umbrella of war. Fucking posers. Things such as ad pauses for Sean's reaction and make sure he doesn't vomit anal, or shoving someone up your ass until they reach your stomach somehow.

Okay. Cock of war, shoving someone into your dick until they reach the balls. All right. Okay. I don't need to go through all these different types of war, do I? It's basically every part of your body. Breast, war, stupid, full tour,

going in through the mouth and coming out the ass. Unbirth, shoving someone into your vagina until they reach the womb, sometimes to be digested and scattered, sometimes involved. Sure people like me are into digestion and some people, okay. All right, should I continue reading this? It's very interesting.

Size also doesn't need to apply with regular people depicted as opening their jaws like in a horror movie as all their organs disappear and their entire torso is turned into a stomach. And some people exclusively get off to only this kind, hating the idea of a perfectly normal woman eating someone the size of a gummy bear, like that one scene and hunting I shrunk the kids. Some people, yeah, yeah, yeah, all this is nonsense. If you thought ads of Simpson's having sex is bad, imagine looking desperately for new content and having to sift through middle school tier drawings of burly furry men shitting out bones. Wow.

Yeah. Lastly, I'll talk about the interesting part, money. I'm currently following a few high-profile artists on Patreon. There's a 3D animator who uses the same big headed furry crystal looking model, but only releases one, two to three minute video, maybe twice a year, who is making five grand a month. He's got to pay for this stuff, doesn't he? I mean, he's got to pay, he's got to commission people. There's another who has drawn the same giant chick doing the same boring vanilla ship for years, who's making 3,500 a month, just drawing. Then there's a savior who is making large-scale 3D animated virtual novel-style video games with regular looking chicks making six grand a month.

There's a friend of mine who draws 2D, mostly furry pictures in black and white, only uploading rough sketches who has more Patreon followers and is making more money than Maddox's measly 152 a month. Does he know that you... Does he not know that you can hide that? I hope this email is interesting. I love the show. And it's weird descent into different fetishes. These past few episodes have been very interesting. Let me know if you have any questions or if you want me to call in. I think my fears of being on the very bottom of the rage board have been alleviated with the last few college you've had on the show. Go fuck

yourself, scene exterior. Wow. Very interesting. If there, yeah, if you can think it, if there's somebody who gets off to it. People are making five grand a month. Yeah. Kimball wants to blare on. Blare? Yeah. All right, let me see.

I see him typing in all caps. Over and over again. All right. Blare, are you there? Hello. Hello, hello, hello. Are you there? Can you hear me?

Yes. We've got no Facebook news this week, so I guess Blair Rodriguez is our only connection to Facebook. Yeah, okay. Kimbo wants you on really badly. Yeah, well, I don't know what, um, what do I, do I tell the Bayley's stuff? Yeah, yeah, what do you got?

No, it's just, um, I didn't, I mean, I don't, I don't like him. So I just made a post. Wait, wait, who don't, who don't you like? Who don't you like? Bayley's Bayley. Steven Bayley. Okay. Yeah, yeah, they had me on the group. Oh, yeah. I made a post. Bailey. Bailey? Stephen Bailey? Yeah.

Yeah, they had me of the group. Oh, yeah. Sorry. I made a post asking people to vote between a Kimballer or a Mertol, a Mertolisanal person from the group to be admins or Bailey's, and Austin to keep being admins, even though they are huge spurgs. Yeah. And they, they Maxwell won and I'm sorry, I'm so nervous.

That's okay. Ha ha ha ha. Dustin left a couple hours after the post. Even thought, I mean, I I was joking I was in my grandmother's house the the power was out and I just made that post we are thinking too much about it um so you're it's it's your fault that Dustin is gone from the Facebook group is that what you're saying? Apparently he left that same day four hours later. I did hear about that.

Yeah, yeah, a dust and a lot of it. How long ago? I don't know. A couple of weeks. Five of November. Ah, the fifth of November. Yeah, that's a shame. I missed that guy.

No, I mean, I don't have anything against him. I just want to do another person into the post. Yeah. And he just left. So you hate Stephen Bailey. I'm getting a lot of, I think Nick and Vikita has a problem with him too. Oh, really?

Yeah. Oh, yeah, he made, he blocked Nick Vikita for, I don't know for what reason I couldn't find it. And he made, Nick Vikita made a post about him arguing, and Stephen Bailey's will comment on a different post about Nicariquita, but he wouldn't unblock him. So people will have to speak to Bailey's, and Bailey's will have to make them tell to Nicariquita what he wanted.

What do you want to say to Steven Baili then? Right? Is that what we're doing? Sure. Yeah. I don't know what you're saying. Steven Baili. Oh, no, I don't have anything against him. Just made a post and he took it too personally. But he is a very bad mod. I mean, he kicked a guy from the facebook group

because he called him fat in a fake posting group a different one plain as fire calling a mad a mod fat john well i think we know that yeah i mean Well, I think we know that. Yeah, I mean. And, and he muted me because apparently one of the rules of the group is that you cannot speak about the mods in the group. You have to tell them. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, yeah. That sounds like one of the rules is that. Yeah. Yeah. That sounds like one of Dustin's rules, is that? Yeah. The best decision I ever made was not moderating any of the channels. Oh, no, of course.

When they got made, Dustin said, well, here do you want to, you know, what should we do? And I'm like, no, I don't have, I've been on the internet a long time. I know how forums work. Absolutely fucking not. Am I moderating anything? I don't want to be hated by

everyone who listens to the show. Right. And that is what happens. Any mod, go to our bad, everyone's gonna fucking hate you. Yep. All right, blood, you want to, you want to listen to voice emails with us? Okay. Okay. What makes, think about what makes your rage too. All right, everybody, this has been the Dix show, dick.show, patreon.com slash the dick show uh... i'm excited to see what people think of this winners drink game that i've developed yeah so you're gonna watch that on monday yes cyber monday okay um...

it's uh... it's a pack cards easy to take with you anywhere look basically fuck cards against humanity okay whatever cards against humanity is doing i'm doing the opposite so if they're buying if if cards against humanity is doing, I'm doing the opposite. So if they're buying, if cards against humanity is raising money to buy a plot of land, to prevent Trump from building the wall,

then I'm building a fucking Tesla coil. I'm buying a plot of land, and I'm building a Tesla coil on it to zap anybody who tries to come across. You see what I'm saying? They've got a 99% off sale. I'm going to I'm going to I have a sale where I pay homeless people to go shit on bird scooters all over Santa Monica. That's my promise to you and the promotion of winners drink my game

fuck cards against the hum- fuck cards against humanity and fuck everyone who plays it. I haven't gotten over the shitting on bird scooters thing. You like that one? Yeah, yeah. I mean, I think it's very funny and the price should probably be done. Uh-huh. And get their pit bull to shit on the bird scooter.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, both of them. It would be a dual species assault. All right, everybody, this has been the Dixiel. The Dixiel.com Patreon.com slash the Dixiel. See you next Tuesday. They're gonna listen to, oh, this has been the Dixiel, the Dixiel.com, patreon.com slash the Dixiel. See you next Tuesday. They're gonna listen to, oh, excuse me.

They're gonna listen to a hard men working hard. All right. So, now we're gonna listen to some voicemails. Oh my, what in the hell is that? Barber pole fetish. What do you think about that, vorsh, shit? It's very interesting. I mean, I've obviously, I don't get it on any sexual level.

You know, but I have this thing where I can't rest until I get it. Yeah, but I don't know what you expect to get. Like imagining, what does that guy get off on? Do you want to feel just a little bit of that arousal like where you're like, oh, now I get it under a very certain circumstance, you could get off to that.

Is it like a guy in men in black? Like he's controlling that big robot guy. I don't know. You know, or like that episode of Star, like when the the trill in Star Trek deep space nine that's in that woman, like is it like, like when the, the Trill in Star Trek Deep Space Nine that's in that woman? Oh yeah. Is that, is that's not the same, right?

You gotta eat it. It's about being eaten somehow. That's the kind of thing, this poor fucking guy, if a woman brought that to the table, no problem. I could do it, get a bunch of little army men, I'll eat them and bad while I'm plowing you. I can make that happen. This guy, this poor fuck,

you think it's that easy for him to get his weird thing fulfilled? No way. No way. No way. Yeah. That's why the thoughts are getting t- are audited, because it's shit like that.

It's not fucking fair. All right, here's the Asterios Aids 2, Mega Mix from hardmanworkinghard, patreon.com slash H-N-NWH. I know America and not America. Enigma here and I've got an enigma for you. You'll know. I'm not using the word Rital.

I have been served a restraining order from the estate of Frank Gorshin and DC Comics. I am to stay 100 feet away from DC Comics headquarters at all times and I am not allowed to use word riddler or riddles. But I've got an enigma for you! I really want to go report some thoughts. I don't know we can come on, bring it out. I got to do background checks to get a gun. Sure. You see how Tom Shoes is going big. Tom Shoes is telling everybody how they need to have more background checks on God's

Cheerios a 2 The album I think they could use an audit me. I'm a stereo's coconut. Yeah, yeah Oh I'm allowed to be on this out. Do you think that? It's so fucking funny. It's like I'm not even allowed to be on an album Apologizing for not being on an album because of the lawsuit because that could be considered commentary on the lawsuit which I'm not allowed to do. The gun background check strived me in saying, okay look do you know anything about that? Not a lot to come in, I mean I know we have them.

Not a lot to come in. Yummy guns, but I am allowed to thank you for buying this album for supporting this crazy shoot for uh Carrying by me, it's Dario's Cominose and for your pledge to each Role me By listening to this album

You have signed a legal contract to me He's rolled me on bread, Twitter or Facebook. I get so easily triggered. Oh my God. Anyway, thank you. Goodbye from me. I love you. Blah, what do you think of Asterios?

Oh, I don't think so. You like him? You got a really cute giggle. Yeah, I'm sorry. I got a weird fetish for that. No. No. You can do that. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go.

I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go.

I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go.

I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. You're wrong. Yeah, 50,000. Yeah. Oh, that's my ex-gas. Who the hell is what background checks in the world is gonna catch that? Is Santa Claus doing the background checks and this fucking magical list are gonna catch what? What can process that amount of checks on anything? Well, they're saying they're gonna make their, but there's like a holding period, right?

Well, they do the background. Three days. Yeah, but every, you have to process the entire list every day or it backs up. Yeah. So 50 right. Yeah. Pagan of process. Another saying they're going to add your social media.

When you buy a gun, they're going to, this is what they're actually, this is what Democrats actually believe. They're going to make you submit your social media in New York to buy a gun. Yeah, it's going to be to each individual state, right? Yeah. Do they, do they? Who the fuck is going to shake this? It sets the background checks, right?

Yes, yes, yes. It doesn't seem like it doesn't seem like the, like they're doing, even what they're supposed to be doing with the background checks. If in three days, if, like you said, 50,000 unsoldered, they're checking your felon're supposed to be doing with the background checks. If in three days, like you said, 50,000 guns sold a day, right? Well, you're a valid, well, we call it prison. Is that three days on handguns? Federally, yeah.

Oh, federally. Yeah. I wonder what, yeah, that's the thing because California is 10. But my point is, the time doesn't matter because it's every fucking day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And what are you gonna do?

Save it up till the weekend? Well, you can't do that. Can't do that. It's gotta be every day. Yeah. It's yeah. And like, what are you going to do? Save it up till the weekend. You can't do that. Can't do that. It's got to be every day. Yeah. So stupid. It's interesting. Every 10 minutes I see on Twitter, every time I log in, Tom shoes 90% of Americans want background checks. Yeah. Well, that's because 90% of Americans don't know what the fuck is going on. That's why. Well, yeah, but I mean, I think I want to know who has a gun.

We have problems then. Why? Why? I don't want anybody. How is that going to work? How? By doing what they're supposed to be doing? What do they think? What do you think they're supposed to be doing? Felony convictions. Felony convictions. Things like that. Like, you know, stuff like that. They got absolutely want to know who has a gun. Well, that, okay, so if a felon tries to buy a gun from a gun store, you want them to have to what go to their neighbor and buy the gun. No, you don't get a gun. Cool, they do.

Let me tell you something about felons having guns. They absolutely have them. No, of course they do. Illegally, you're never going to stop that. Well, then why stop anything? to have them. No, of course they do. Illegal, you're never going to stop that. Well then why stop anything? Because do the point. Because doing so, that's not a real argument.

It's like because you can't solve it all, you say do none of it. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like it's like, oh, like, you know, kids drown every day. It's like, well, you know, I mean, the kid could get through that fence around the pool. Yeah. So don't make me have it. So don't make me, no, you don't have to have it. It's just a smart thing to do. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no every state? I don't know about every state. Well, maybe a bad example. I'm just using it for an example because of something it's like, dude, it's like common sense.

Like, that's the thing. Can't stop kids from smoking vapes. No. Cause the cost of being cool. Yeah, what are you doing? Thucks up their hockey practice. No, no, I mean, you're like doing something is doing is better than doing nothing in those cases.

Oh no, I strongly disagree with that. Why? Doing something for the sake of doing something is bad. But doing something, if it achieves some result, like I said, you're never going to get rid of, you're never going to get rid of like felons having guns. Yeah. Just make a little more difficult. Well, how?

By doing what they're supposed to be doing. The background checks you're saying. Yeah. Okay. So then, yeah. I mean, you don't have anything to worry about getting a gun, right? I mean, well, yes, I do.

Why? Because the point is that they don't want me to have any. Like, this is, who doesn't want you to have any? There's some women. Yeah. They don't want, most of they don't want me to have any. Like, this is who doesn't want you to have any. Moms, women. They don't want most of America doesn't want me to have a gun. I don't know about most of America. There is always the loud ass minority who thinks gun should just be illegal. Yeah.

You're going to have to overturn the Second Amendment. Well, they have. Who has? Nobody's going to turn the Second Amendment. Yeah, they have. No, yes, they have because, okay, Nobody's in California. In California, yes. Yeah, they have. No, yes, they have, because, okay, can you not buy a gun here? I can't, I can't bear it.

I can't bear it on my person outside, period. Okay, so it's, I can't bear it at all. Yes, I can't have it. So that's partially, right, right? So that's, that's contrary to the, to the full of the second amendment. Yeah. Yeah, to right keep and bear on. Overturned.

Yeah, there you go. Yeah, effectively. Well, I can't do the bear part. I can't do the bear turn. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, effectively. Well, I can't do the bare part. Yeah, partially. Yeah. Yeah, partially. That's why I'm so pissed off. Yeah.

Now, there's adding more shit. Well, we gotta do checks. We gotta have background checks. You guys can't, do you know how many people it would take to do this at the speeds that we're talking about? Yeah, so cares. I don't care is what everybody wants. Yeah, I Yeah, so cares. I don't care what everybody wants.

Yeah, I don't know how I don't know how many states can't do. I don't know if any states do them properly. There must be. Settlerily, it's federal. That's federal. They can't go that fast. They can't process that many.

Yeah, but aren't the background checks done by each individual state? And in California, yes, and the federal government has their own. Do any states not't the background checks done by each individual state? And in California, yes, and the federal government has their own. Do any states not have state background? So probably Nevada. I don't know. I'm saying is there are reasons why certain people shouldn't be in society.

Just as there's probably reasons why certain people probably shouldn't be allowed to vote, shouldn't be allowed to have some guns. Felons, are you, do you think felons should be able to vote? Um, do I think felons should be able to vote? Do I think felons should be able to vote? Felons can't vote. I don't care about the voting part. Because I think that's, because they vote with gun, right?

Because I think voting is kind of a lost cause. Yeah. Yeah. Because you didn't vote for Trump like me. That was great. No. That was a great thing, no, I think I just think I'm very, very cynical on the power, the power, the people in power are going to stay in power. It's like, we're on the other side of the fence. If you're, if you're us, if you're

Democrat or Republican, you ain't in the club. Yeah. You ain't in the club. It doesn't matter. People, and people don't see it that way. It's like, keep people like us fighting with each other. And it's like you and me. Or whatever. Denzel and Peach. Yes. Fighting and Munked each other. Yep.

Yeah. All right. Let's do some voice mail. Hey, Dick. As I got up this morning morning i was just kind of idly thinking about it but it occurred to me the you and maddox has something in common

she maddox doesn't run any ad on his website and you don't run any ads on the podcast so maybe you start letting us know and i'm the episode you don't run at the Yeah, just a word where that's true. I hope you and Sean a girl, Jamie, and he was not a big because that they're happy things going. See you. Thank you. Sean, I've never run ads. I know you'd count your, count your restraint and and mean and morality level. I how would he say it? I've never run ads on my, I mean, I've never run ads on my podcast.

Never. Yeah, you want to talk about integrity? Yeah, I've never run ads. That's my livelihood. Yeah, my livelihood. I've never run ads on my podcast. It's true, it's a good point. Yeah, yeah. Not only are the colleges and universities right i've never run ads on my podcast uh... true it's good point

not only are the colleges and universities raping students financially they're also raping them intellectually there are over forty five hundred god am colleges across the sputthin nation how many of them that is that he's been a hard more causes than there are smart people to teach

because only an idiot would go and act to be a bird long term especially some of these local bullshit regional colleges god damn it is such a fucking champ i can't like if anything was sent to civil war it should be the way every guy that college graduate or person even like started college but didn't finish that should be the fucking fucking sumpter hill the next award for something I think I I think my idea of having I think my idea of having a mock civil war like sumpter hill better is a great idea I really I do think we need to get some of this aggression out with a real good civil war. Yeah, we need to decompress and win some ways.

I don't, I'm not the opposite. It's the opposite, that's right. You can't misgender someone on purpose on Twitter anymore. They made that a bannable offense. Yeah. See those, I remember all the trans people saying that we were crazy crackpots for thinking that they were gonna make it illegal to tease them.

But it's slowly happening. Yeah. A little bit by a little bit. Yeah. We're making, yeah, in practice, making things illegal to mean, I know how, I know how much, I know how funny it is. And I know that that is usually means they're going to take it. Let's see what else we got here Hey, dad, it's Tom from Amsterdam

So my rage of the week is Jins that are missing have one less piece of equipment than what you need them for So I consider myself a bit of a left I mean Yeah, then the jet then lifting things like that football in high school I would find a gem of a left in the jim in lifting to play football in high school to find a gem with a winner's trashes yet within chicago germany now like a monorail

work trips places on the philippine but all of these jams always have one universal truth there is always one less equipment piece than you actually then you need. And they're all so the other meaning the other ones are always taken. So there's one less set of the dumbbells that you need. One less set of the dumbbells that you would need. I mean, one less flat bench than you need new horrible. Shrugs, it's a fuck leg day, but you still need one less set of cable machines to be able to be able to be capable of. He's totally right.

He's totally right. And cable extensions. And do you know why? Because I hate waiting in line and doing awkward sets in between people. Because then out of the gym, I don't want to talk to anyone or associate with anyone I just want to zone out with subtoons and pump some iron. So that's my rage for the week. Yeah, he's absolutely right.

And you know why? This is so important now because everyone is on their fucking cell phones when you're on the fucking bench in between sets they're on the fucking bench, in-between sets, they're taking like five fucking minutes to do three in-between each set. But where you got, they stand there and they're fucking typing, like it's like, Jesus Christ, you're doing nothing. You realize you're doing nothing, right?

You're completely fucking recovered. Yeah, they, they did. God, I fucking hate it so much. And that's, no, they did. I mean, God, I fucking hate it so much. And that's, no, they need, what? No, that's, that's it. That's it. He's totally right number one, and it's only getting worse.

They just sit there. I think that you make you fucking check your phones at the door. I'm just recovering here. Let me just scoot around. You know what? Nothing you can do. I'm all for buying guns at the gym.

Yeah, that'll move people along. No background checks if you buy a gun at the gym. They should hurry the mother fucker up on the bench. They should make you pay more. Yeah, you bring your phone in. Yeah. Maybe more people would, I can't imagine more people doing it.

Fucking assholes. I'd have a special gym phone. You just swap your phone in at the beginning and then you can only, it only lets you be on it for like 30 seconds and then it shuts off. Because no, there's nothing you can do on the phone that is equal to or less than the amount of time it takes you to recover.

And then you're still going to drink water. Yeah, and you're still doing all the same bullshit, but you have a whole other extra step in it. You've put everybody who wants that machine's life on hold for like three minutes. It's like nine minutes for you to fucking do. At least if you're resting twice. I didn't think about that.

I'm so busy on my phone. Yeah, I work out in the garage now. Well, that's fine. So I, oh man, it takes me about three hours. I'm like, I'm like, for Chad now, crying into my eggs. Yeah. See how my phone, crying into my eggs. Yeah. See how my phone, I got my computer in there.

It's great. What do you think, Blah? Yeah, Blah, you got to the gym? Are you a lift? Oh, well, I went for like two months. That's what happened. What happened? The gym.

Why only two months? Well, because I was, I didn't know how to use the machines and I couldn't ask people and every time they tried it, I don't know I think I heard myself more than what I did. I should try. It should be a lot of people willing to show you. There'd be a lot of people who would help you out. I think that gentleman who just held in would be willing to fly down there. What do you look like?

Like a Picture Do you look like anybody that can you anybody famous anybody? I don't know. I'm trying to picture what she looks like Do you look are you more of an Amy Schumer or? What are you trying to ask Sean? I don't know what she looks like. Do you look, are you more of an Amy Schumer or, uh, what are you trying to ask Sean? I don't know what she looks like. Yeah. Uh, well, I don't, I don't, but they, they say, uh, we know the writer, but I don't. So, uh, do you have Skype? Oh, wow. Do you have, do you have, do you have, uh, do you have Skype? Do you have a webcam? No, no. No, okay. All right, we got a wage, Sean.

No, Jamie has, oh, thank you, Jamie. Thank you for showing Sean a picture of Blair. What did you think, Sean? She's cute. How do you think? Well, how cute? She's cute. Yeah. She looks like kind of how I thought she might. How did you think? Well, how cute. She's cute. Yeah.

She looks like kind of how I thought she might. How did you think she would look? Well, you know, probably dark hair. I know you like dark hair. Well, I mean, I prefer women with hair in general. Yeah. What about in their privates? What about that?

Oh, no. Oh, no. She says, what celebrity do you think she looks like? I don't know. Let me see it again. Let me see it again, Jamie. No. What celebrity do you think she looks like?

You got to relax. I don't know. Let me think about it. Let me think about it. It's fine. It's kind of like a thin Winona Ryder kind of. Yeah. Like a little bit thinner.

Yeah. Yeah. That's not a pretty good comparison. Yeah. Winona Ryder used to be really thin. It's true. I mean, she's, you know, she's like 50 years old now, I think. What?

Really? I have a late mid to late 40s. Whoa. Alright. Yeah. Alright, really? I don't know, middle eight forties. Whoa. All right. Yeah. All right, let's off the hook. Oh. What? What's going on over there?

No, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I'll hook up. What? Oh, no, no. I'm just saying, I'll stop questioning you. Oh, okay.

That's, oh yeah. Off the hook, might not be an expression in our Let me just cool down the sexual tension in this room with a digi bro voice mail. No First the fucker looks at pictures of little girls and master base for them fucking a pile Thank you. Now he's giving people with horsekin a bad rep fucking a what fucking moron this is through their foreskin and thinks they're

thinking about his dick probably smells so fucking bad smells like old stagnant piss you know that kind of piss when you go through an alley and you see a bunch of homeless people hanging out in a bump is that kind of smell of yeah you imagine the game pit bulls Jesus

You What the fuck how lazy are you Worrying about that I wanted to follow up, but then I like started to dry heave so I didn't yeah I got more pictures of blood here for you Sean started to dry heave so I didn't. Yeah, I got more pictures of blood here for you, Sean. like a predicting of how people look that you're so proud of? Yeah, that's kind of my thing Audio engineer thing you guys are real proud of that. Yeah Yeah, exactly. I can I can you mean how you thought she would look I can hear hair color I didn't expect just her voice and she I would guess she's very small and petite. Okay, so let me let me translate

You look like how you you look the hell he wanted you to look. That's not how you thought she would look. That's how I thought she would look. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It is. Okay, let's say, yeah, I'm quite impressed with myself. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got it.

I see what's going on here. Go away. All right, you know what makes me a fucking rage? What's that for each later holiday? The big three being the fourth of July Thanksgiving and Christmas. Somebody comes home for the holiday. You know, one of your fucking neighbors' sons or whatever.

Michael's a kid. Michael's a kid. And then they can't keep it together for three fucking days. So on Christmas Eve or Thanksgiving or the Fourth of July, you end up instead of just enjoying a nice quiet night with your friends and family you have to listen to your gift-shit neighbors get into a goddamn screaming match and instead of having a nice time you got to sit there and wonder oh Jesus is this bad enough that I get involved? Do you know you're in a homicide investigation?

When really in your heart you want to be showing off or blood now? You're all of those. Because it's fucking ridiculous that you have so little self-control that you can't feel the pain for a couple of days every year. You're the better idea. If shit's that bad, just stay home. Don't invite anyone over. No, I disagree.

You don't go home with your family. Jesus. You don't know, sir. You don't know how good you have it. I used to have a real wonderful collection of freaks in my apartment building. You know, people getting restraining orders against each other. I had this, I had this pair of lesbians next door to me, fatter than hell, and they would get in huge screaming matches in the hallway throwing Tupperware at each other and screaming. They're both the same kind of physically.

Yes, yes, yes. Both on each, as on each, each more unattractive than the last. I would, I would turn all my lights off when they started fighting and I would turn my phone, I would put my phone to record, and Army Crawl over to the door and then stick like slide the bottom of my phone through.

So it would be the microphone in the hall. Why would you have to record that? Army Crawl under crawl over to the door and then stick, like, slide the bottom of my phone through so it would be the microphone in the hall. But you have to call that. I would record the Army crawl over to your door. I don't know. I don't want to. Yeah, it was shut. I was like doing a thing. I was being a spy.

Okay. I was having a good time with, I was shutting it all off and then just wait there. Like, I didn't want them to notice my little phone sticking out into the hall. So I would wait for a particularly loud bang or series of bang and slide it out like that, just so I could enjoy it again later.

That's funny. I miss those times. Do you have any of those? I don't think so. My phone's been through so many different iterations to get to this point now that I think I lost them, but it's a, well, that wouldn't be the holidays without a couple of big blowouts.

You'll miss it when it's gone. You'll miss it when it's gone. I'll say that. Oh. Some interesting names on these this week. Oh, here we go. I think maybe we'll just do this one. All right.

Dig on your point of not too many mothers being alive, I recently developed a hypothesis that thanks to modern medicine too many women are staying alive Thanks to them not dying childbirth. I believe this is a fucking problem and especially since this thing Convention of women surviving childbirth happened after women sufferage. There's a conspiracy here That's why we're getting a liberal hellhole yeah all of our western country through all these western countries that let women vote it's there a western country that doesn't let women vote

and is it a hellhole i think there's a relation yeah we're in liberal vote let them see we we are owed it because of divine providence, right? Yeah, we let them vote. Yeah, subtle differences in the descriptions. Too many moms, guys write.

It's too many moms. They're supposed to be, they're supposed to be keeling over in childbirth. Well, now we gotta keep them alive with Christmas CDs and frappuccinos and targets, targets, targets. That guy last week from Florida is like a, he's a, he's a thought leader really. He's doing his part. Yeah.

Yeah. What's your fucking problem? What's your fucking deal? Killed your mom? Huh? No. I killed my mom. Get it together.

Get it together. Get it together. I did my share. What do you want me to go around killing everybody's mom? Yeah. I already fucking did it. I never got a court. Fucking sucked. Yeah, I'm not doing your dirty work.

Should have done it when you were a kid. Yeah. What have been easier? You could just spend a year in Juvey. No big deal. Right. Um, I think that's enough. At least it's enough.

Blair, what makes you rage? Anything with your rage? Bad nuggets. Mac nuggets? No, bad ones because I bought some and they changed the recipe and they didn't tell you because they get cheap with the ingredients. They gave me, it was like pure chicken, which just spread around, it wasn't a nugget.

It was like a millionis, sir. And hello. It was like a millionis. Mm-hmm. I did notice that when they changed the McNugget recipe. Worldwide? Yes. Really.

It was, it was, because it used to be dark, some were dark meat. That's right. And they would have like things in them that you was, it was because they used to be dark, somewhere dark meat. That's right. And they would have like things in them that you could tell it, it was real. Yeah. They changed it to that stupid pink, they changed it to all white meat, but it's a white meat slurry in the form of McNuggets. And it used to be, they called that, it used to be really textured chicken.

Yeah. And I also, but then they also pumped it so full of sugar that I do think they ruined, I do think they ruined the, I think she's right. The batter, the batter for a McNugget is sweet. It's very similar to their apple pie crust. If you think about it, it is. Yeah, a lot of sugar in those. Um, yeah, bad McNugget.

You're right. I just cover them in so much hot mustard sauce that I just don't think I taste it. I don't eat him much. I wish. I love McNuggets though. I wish that they would come in a cup. I don't know what, like, really? Yes, because I'm so sick of holding it on my lap.

The McNugget box, you know, as you're trying to drive, what they just, let's stop fooling ourselves. So you can use a cup holder. Everybody who's eating them is gonna, sometimes I'll go nuts and just order a large drink with nothing in it just to have the glass and dump the McNuggets in the glass. And then I'll dump the sauce in too.

And just say, fuck it, it's a free for all. Well, it's like a buffalo, you know, that's like your toss buffalo wings. Yeah. That's how I do it. Large glass, dump the 10 wings in dump the sauce in bucket I'm not I'm not doing a balancing act on my lap today. Yeah, not a bad idea It's a free one

There you go my gift tip. All right, thanks for calling in um I Hope that you've increased your enemies and such. Oh, yeah Yeah, can I say something? your enemies and such. Oh yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Can I say something? Uh, uh, myrtle, uh, his house burned down. No, his house. Um, shop, how do you say a wheeling shop burned down? So if someone can help, uh, who's something shop? Myrtle, myrtle tuna. Yes. Myrtle tuna. Okay. Does he have a go fun me or something? Should we go to patreon.com slash the stereos? What's, we go to find the side? I don't think he made anything but it's just this week it happened

is welding terrible yeah and he's like he's busy he broke down so now he can come to my rabbit streams oh how you burned down a welding shop. I don't know. I don't know, man. I was. Hmm. All right. Well, question. Those are thoughts for another day.

Maybe you and Dom may call in and read these. That would be amazing at them. Yep. Yep. All right. Goodbye. Goodbye, everyone. I want that.

Bye. Bye. Bye!