The Dick Show - Episode 145 - Dick on Kicking Up a Stink

Episode Date: March 12, 2019

Nighttime birds, the cost of motherhood in the US, troubleshooting dad's pornography license, a government for the unlucky, soph calls in about kid prisons, Digibro is in studio, a guide for dealing with a stinky, a Dick Show Virgin gets rejected by a prostitute, moving across the country for cans, Vic Lasagna, Jamie Marchi learns about contextual racism the hard way, Sean and his slow editing, and the Dr. Phil episodes have been found; all that and more this week on the Dick Show!

Do people know your name? May. Okay. Yeah. She's always got to check. She's hundreds of videos online. Okay. Oh, wait a minute.

I just realized who we have in here. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you guys did you know? Where is Cameron going ballistic? Yeah. This is like in crippled Jesus in there. There's 20 guys who want to fight.

Did you, bro? Jumping up and down in his chair, right? He's got his hydraulics going. Yeah, no, for sheer will, he's getting like a six inch jump on that thing, just forcing his upper, he's throwing his arms up in the air. Yeah. Uh, working on it. Where'd you end up getting a beer?

I thought he didn't have any. Well, this is the Dixho IPA. This was number one leg day IPA made by the $20 million meet, man. That's when you get desperate when you're drinking your souvenirs. I mean, I feel like I should be drinking whiskey, something, but I can't justify that. Yeah, not on this. Not on this. Especially it's going to be St. Patrick's Day next weekend.

The day of our Lord, the day of my daughter's wedding, this is the day of my Lord's wedding. This is the day of my daughter's wedding. I already know it's going to get hot in here. Damn, I'm never cold in my fucking my hands are freezing. You don't pick that up on the mic? No, it's very expensive. It's why he got this one. Lifestyles of the rich and the famous.

Yes, yes. Many thousands of dollars spent on air conditioning. It's just that like this is exactly what my setup is like a baby version of what you have here. So I do the same thing. It's probably cleaner though. Probably a little cleaner. Mine. Different sorts of pornography. So yeah, I do the same thing probably cleaner though probably a little cleaner mine

Different sorts different sorts of pornography yeah, oh Not wrong at all I can only only imagine the fucking letters we're gonna get for this Oh Welcome to dig you want diggin you dig you love digging you got it is a show where everything's a contest Come to you live from Mount Buckard even the hardest city of failure. I'm your hostic man. She's in the $20 million man from Mount Bunker, deep in the hardest city of failure. I'm your host, Dick Mancherson. The $20 million man voted America's best Mexican. Let's say 25 weeks.

I think you're on 26. 26 weeks running. Thank you, Sean. So we're going to minus 19 from the number every time. So with me, he's always, most of the time is LA based comedian Sean, the audio engineer. What? What's up, buddy?

Running on fumes, are we Sean? Be a fair licting your duties on the show. Are we Sean? I'm pushing the car up the hill. This is a fumes are gone. Totally abandoning me and my hour of need on this show in the bone-strap episode. And that's recorded.

That was the worst bonus. I'm still pissed that I haven't even heard it. You haven't heard it yet. I haven't even heard it. That's how crazy it is right now. But I haven't even heard it. You haven't heard it yet. I haven't even heard it. That's how crazy it is right now, but I haven't even heard it. I can't wait to hear it. That is the one that I did not want to miss. You mean to tell me you didn't hear this song?

I am the greatest. I am the greatest man in the world What the fuck are you hearing? Then all those stupid little boys and girls Oh man You're bad What was this for? Yeah, I'm a part of my way

Because my balls are so big They're momentum is impossible to change There's a note from me, dog Yeah, I'm the greatest man in the world Big You know what never mind never mind. I need an adult like he suddenly realized maybe he can't do this. He's committed himself to doing it. And he can't just say, you know what, never mind, never mind. I need an adult. I need an adult. I talk my way into this bike.

I can't, I can't, I can't. 100 million people you could hire to sing for you. For free. Yeah. That was for a cartoon that Maddox and I sold the Fox made with a budget. I remember I thought guitar gets smashed at the end of that little bit. Right.

Yes. I told the story on the bonus episode, I suppose, Sean, whenever you can get around to it, whenever you can get around to editing it. My goal is to finish by midnight tonight on my last day of editing. What are you editing for, for like Obama's memoirs? What's more important than this bonus episode I'm trying to get out to people. Nothing, my priorities are terrible.

You are, you do have shitty priorities. I wish one priority should be to this show. Yeah. No, to me. And then the show. So that if there is an instance where the show and my own personal needs conflict choose me But you are not even on the first page dude. It's bad. It's bad Well, you look like shit if that's any consolation I'm all your hard work. I feel like shit ditching this show and it's time of need

I can't believe it. Digi bros with us. Yeah, dig gave his home address to Digi-brow. And now the heat is off me. He is not on you. What's up? Sof is calling in. Who? Wonder, Vunderkind. Blackpilled Sof, Redpilled Sof, 14-year-old YouTuber. Digi-brow heard about that.

He ran, ran right. What? I don't know who this is. No, Sof's a YouTuber. She's incredible. She's hilarious. She's only 14. She's amazing. She's calling it later. Oh, God. she's a YouTuber, she's incredible. She's hilarious, she's only 14, she's amazing. She's calling it later. Oh, God.

She's either like, alt-right, uh, I know who you're talking about. Yeah, I know. I thought Bet you'd do. She made this video, she's shooting all. She's kidding. She's kidding. You're the reason her comments are going to say, but I don't know.

Yeah. And your beautiful wife, girlfriend, fiance. Fiance, your beautiful fiancee is here. Oh my goodness. girlfriend. Fiance. You're beautiful. Fiance is here. Oh my goodness. Yeah. Thank you. You turns out you're doing everything right after all.

I can't go online and brag about having a hot girlfriend, but if somebody else says it for me, then who people trust, then everybody knows now. You guys are walking the door. I was like, whoa, wait, wait a minute. This is the woman that called in that was going to fight crippled Jesus. Is this an S-court? What's going on? It's absolutely stunning.

I'm gonna start putting Lollie Con on your Tinder profile. That's the secret. That's what I've learned meeting DigiRot and his fiancee. Sean, what, you gotta get that bonus episode edited immediately. I can't. Well, then you're fired. Oh God.

We're counting on you. Did you not hear that song? Yeah, I know. I know. In the bonus episode, I tell the story of the cartoon, the Maddox, that I sold to Fox ages ago, 10 years ago, and the story of the fortuitous discovery of a hard drive in the back of Sean's closet or something, work closet, I don't know how the hell you found it, but you found it.

Wasn't that amazing? Yeah. That was like, I was like, there's no way I have this. Like, I was like, oh, you're looking for the pro-tools session and I'm like, oh my god, it's the only thing from that show I have on this drive. And you have those only file, well, up until I have every day's ago.

Every vocal take, because he did it at my old place. So we, we had, I tell the story in the bonus episode, but to quickly recap it, we told us, we sold a cartoon to Fox and we're in doing the, in recording it, we put ourselves in the cartoon for reasons of business and vanity. Wait, but what was your name in the cartoon? Greg. Greg. That's right.

That was my joke in the cartoon because the first time I met Maddox, I sent him an email saying, hey, Greg, it was nice to meet you because I forgot his name. So it was a joke from me that says, I knew he didn't remember, but the first time I met him

I was like, hey, Greg, nice to meet you. And it's like, oh, that's what I'm saying. So you're just fucking with him the whole time that you guys do each other? I'm fucking with everybody. Well, yeah, all the nice to meet you. And it's like, oh, that's what you're just fucking with him the whole time that you guys do each other. I'm fucking with everybody. Well, yeah, all the time. Right. I'm stuck.

But he never noticed the ear in this broken simulation. No, never. So we recorded the lines and Maddox's are absolutely terrible, which, well, that's my personal opinion. You, you, you, you be the judge, listen to the bonus episode, and then Sean discovered 20 takes of him singing that terrible, terrible song, which we listened to. That was just a preview that we got,

but we listened to, we listened to all of them. I thought they would stop being funny at around like seven, but they weren't. There's like 15 of them, 16. They just get funnier and funnier. Yeah. Actually, no, there's a zero listed in there. So there must be 17 or 18 of them in there.

Yeah, oh yeah, yeah, there's 17 songs. I thought it would not be funnier. Did you ever listen to the final comp? I mean, that was the one that, you know, we took the best bits of each. And your comp, it looks like a candy cane. Like, how did you actually look at the edited one, not the consolidated one? I looked at both. Yeah, it looked like a UPC. How did you actually look at the edited one, nothing consolidated one?

I looked at both. Yeah, it looked like a UPC code, right? Yes, it looks like a colorful UPC. It looks like a 80s girls colored pen packs from all the different playlists. Chop, chop, chop, chop, like mid-syllable chops. Yeah. Oh, you don't even have the,

you probably even sound at worst because you don't have any of the plugins I do, right? So you probably just didn't have sounded better without the plugins. Yeah. No, I mean, you got it and all it's glory is what I'm saying. Then we watched the cartoon. I didn't think the cartoon was that bad. I remember it being a lot worse than it was.

I haven't seen finished animation on it. I don't think. I think I've seen, I think I have seen animatic. So this has like a fully realized episode. It was three minutes, three, three minutes. I forgot how short they were. Yeah. And that was their undoing. Yeah, like you said, it's not a pilot.

It's, you don't understand enough in like a... It feels unsatisfying. They're like sizzles except for people don't know anything about it, so a sizzle doesn't work. And you have to tell a whole story. So it's just people tripping over their own dicks to get exposition out. Like, like, military guys want to fight,

did you bro, they're all tripping over there? What kind of network were you trying to sell this shit? Fox, bought it. Oh, they gave you. Fox, they gave you. Yeah, they gave you. Fox animation, bought it. Oh, Fox, they gave you. Fox bought it. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation.

Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation.

Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation.

Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. Yeah, they gave you Fox animation. higher cartoon were inconsequential. They ended up picking up none of them. Yeah, they have millions of dollars. They ended up picking up none of them. They dropped a million bucks on some stupid celebrities cartoon. I forget who was some dumb cartoon about school,

like a kid who knew too much, big fucking deal. Yeah. Not even an attractive kid. Damn. Just Just excited. And then Fox, Fox Network just hired somebody else instead of turning it over. Anyway, it's a funny bonus episode. It's very embarrassing. So it's very embarrassing. Um, let's see here. Other big news, the Dr. Phil tapes have apparently been found that but that's just developing.

I don't have any new information on that. And another country? Yes. A Portuguese, a dickhead tracked down a guy in Portugal who has quick time copies. It's amazing. I've seen evidence of the copies. It's amazing. I've seen evidence of the copies. It's amazing.

I have yet to get communication from the gentleman. My goodness, I'm out of order here. Okay, what, let's see, what makes me rage? What makes me rage? Did you wrote, do you have something that makes you rage? Part of it? I'll wait till after. You'll wait till after, you know.

The best part of this show is the first 45 minutes where you just ran by yourself. I'm going to Quality significantly once I open my mouth. I got beat it at smash brothers by my nephew. You got beat it. I got beat it Beaded. Yeah, I got for real beat at smash brothers for real. Well, that kid probably just Like I was supposed to be practicing violin. He's just in there Playing smash brothers. I mean probably well, but isn't Smash Brothers one of those games where you can there's a lot of There's sort of some luck or some be get because it's a it's the it's the game It's what it is the shit out of it, right? No, they're if you're good you can beat other people all the time

They're all that okay. All right. There is championship play of the Smash games So you point is I went through all the time. There is championship play of the smash game. So you point is I went through all the stages of death of the death of myself as he was kicking the shit out of me. Wow. From I'm patronizing you by playing with you. I am afraid now. I'm just going to try to, I'm going to, I'm going to just try to beat you, give like an

honest try. I'm desperately trying to beat you. I'm pretending like I'm just gonna try to, I'm gonna, I'm gonna just try to beat you, give like an honest try. I'm desperately trying to beat you. I'm pretending like I'm not trying to beat you. And I'm trying to be, and now I'm pulling out cheap moves. Still not working. I went from there's cheap moves on there. Well, there's cheap moves in everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can always do cheap shitty moves that piss people.

I'm the king of cheap shitty moves. I'm the king of cheap shit moves. I'm the king of cheap shit moves. But the object is to win, no? Well, yeah. Well, my mind, because I'll find a cheap move and then I'll turn it into mind games outside. I'll find a cheap move and then say it right before I do it. Fuck with people's leg sweep.

Leg sweep. Leg sweep, because it gets in your head. Leg sweep. Leg sweep. Leg sweep. Yeah. Right, leg sweep, so it gets in your head. You're a lyrical birdie. Yeah, leg sweep. Yeah. I even tried that on a child. Well, you got a, I was trying to, I was trying to fuck with a child.

You've got to intimidate where you can. And you know what? It didn't work. I still. You made him like this. I still got beat. Yeah. I still got beat.

I've never been so humiliated or angry than I was at that moment getting spin kicked by Rob, the cheap fuck robot. Hmm. It was a big, it was a big loss for me. Jesus. It sent you into a drinking tail spin? It did.

Yeah. And I couldn't even swear afterwards. That was the worst part. So I don't know if he does my one swear fuck up by playing Mario Tennis. I let out, I said shit. Yeah, I lost by a little bit. And I was like, oh damn it, sorry.

Does he just laugh? That's swear words? They don't care, they're not that funny to them. No, but I mean, are his parents like don't swear around him? No, because I'm the best one at keeping it in. Yeah. I have the least fuckups. Oh, got you. It comes to swearing around the children. Yeah. Yeah. I couldn't believe it. I was I couldn't it was sitting there watching it. And of course, he watches all of the all of the after the

after climax cut scenes. Oh, sure. Sure. He doesn't scuffling it. Yeah. Oh, man, you mother fucker. And he's not even celebratingling. Oh man, you motherfucker. And he's not even celebrating. He's like, yeah, that's right. That's what you have to represent. ROB, should be ROD's nuts, uncle. Oh man. So now I have to be,

now I can't say his uncle after that. And then he says, I fuck you up, uncle. And he says, well, why don't you play as Rob? Also, you got such a problem dealing with them. Well, no, because if I, he's giving you tips now, if I play as Rob and I lose, then I really have no penis. Yeah. And because Rob is the cheapest fucking again. If I can't beat him, honestly, on random character. Yeah, you've got to have something in your back

pocket to go, you know, just just for little self preservation of the mind. It was a humiliating weekend for me. Yeah. Yeah. And I wore my dad's tuxedo to a gala. That was a big mistake. You say gala. What do you say?

No, I say that too. And almost everybody else says gala. You got a, I think, yeah, either way is correct, I think. No. Gala. Gala or gala. Yeah, or that's what I mean. gala gala or gala. Yeah, that's what I mean Yeah, gala and gala I think well what has happened to me is that I've gotten too fat for my my suits that aren't totally destroyed No, I've become too fat for yeah, so I was drunk my liquor finally had a consequence in my life my liquor Finally just finally finally After 38 years.

Yeah, finally bit me. Finally got stung by the liquor, unbelievable liquor, but the liquor be. That's quite a track record though. I was over at my parents house, lamenting the state of my shrinking suits. And my dad says, well, why don't you just wear my dad's solutions for life or always about 90% there. I don't know why my parents are calling me during the show.

He goes, well, I've got a tux. You could wear that. It'll look great. And of course, my mom, any insane idea he has, he immediately agrees with. That's why it works out. So I ended up wearing what looked like a poncho or a trash bag. Really? A fancy gala because it's my dad's, he's like two inches larger than me. I looked like Tom Hanks, the child in big when all of when he shrinks and all of his clothes are walking around with elephant trunks on your arms for an evening. Very embarrassing.

For me. Was it a recent tux? Can we say a tux or a suit? Tux. Tux? Yeah. Do you own a tux? No.

Well, now I own a tux that's a size too big for me. Gotcha. Is that count? Yeah. Okay. Er, let me tell you what makes me rich. I don't know why I got. Porn ID cards have come to the UK.

Do you know about this, Sean? No, I don't. Have did you explain it? I think boomers just, they just legislated themselves out of pornography. You now have to have an ID card. You mean like medical marijuana used to be? Oh, just like your ID, I think.

Like you have to be. So they can track you. I don't, to prove that you're of age. Oh my God, oh, it's just an ID for, yeah. And that's come to the UK. But online porn. Yeah. I don't know how the fuck it's gonna scan you.

Like, who has my ID now after I hold it in front of my webcam everybody Is that what you have to I want that is that they should present your ID or you have to go to a corner store and Use your ID to buy jerk off credits I think they call them and then you come home and type in a code but jack off But you in the UK do you actually to, but is it actually for purchase? Yes. So now, yes. Oh my God.

You can go, you have to go to the cigarette store. If you want to see, if you want to see what's going to cause a revolution in this country, that's it. I can't believe, I cannot believe, I can't believe it has that gigantic vaginas, the men in the UK are. That's incredible. To let this get through. That's incredible.

There would be many, many murders if they tried. I would like to, I would like to think in America that there would be many murders. Life is worth a half a year. Life is worth a half a year. It's more stressful today than it's ever been. Yeah. And women are, every day they get worse. Making the pornography that much access to pornography, that much more important. Why did we even invent it? Why

did we have why did we make an internet? If you have to go to the store, why did we make an internet and why did we give women an eating disorder globally if you have to go to the store and buy jerk-off credits I don't know Now you haven't imagine this you have to help your dad Install his jack-off credits or ID into the internet. They don't think this shit through you're right Into the internet they don't think this shit through you're right Interant boomers cannot do one they can't even text they need to call you to explain them how to do it text now

Everyone's dad in the UK Is going to need help from their kids to jack off and then your mother's gonna find out that you helped dad. Now it's a whole family dynamic issue. Why even, what do you mean? Don't help your father with his jack-off credits. Like why do we need, why do you need to be 18 to look at porn? Okay, well.

Well, you're not looking at porn before you're 18? Of course I was. Well, sure. It didn't, you are fine now. Yeah, well, this could be a slippery slope with DJ. He's got to, we're gonna start talking about the reverse. Well, like, there's all this shit that we try to hide from kids like friends.

I was like, we try to keep kids from swearing, but then they just grow up and they swear. You didn't change anything. Like, just let the fucking kids swear while he's a kid. It doesn't, it makes no difference. Everyone's, you, but it's a bad reflection on the parents.

That's why we don't let kids swear. Like we don't care. It's a bad reflection on the mom. That's why. Okay. Dad's don't give a fuck. True. True safe for women.

Yeah. Is that still happening? It's still happening. Okay. I need more aphorisms. You're right. I get on it. I've been fantasizing about having a chance to introduce you

as the emperor of aphorisms and connoisseur of catch phrases. That's a good answer. As a fellow Oscar Wilde guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oscar Wilde with two dicks. I don't know about you. On the back of the book. There's something quaint about stealing your dad's playboy.

Yeah. Well, yeah, like a norm. That's going to belongs in a Norman Rockwell that belongs in a Sunday evening, Saturday evening post because now porn isn't, it's not transferred. You know what I mean? Like you don't, it's in the cloud. Yeah, you don't find stuff from, you don't find your dad's videos. There's nothing online about stealing your dad's

jack-off identity card online. Right, right. You've got to print out a picture of your dad now and hold it up to get Pono approval. I don't even know how the system works. It's stupid, anyway, you come up with it. The idea that the idea that children are not, teenager boys are not going gonna find the pornography.

Like, we found it when it was locked down physically. Yeah, right. I'll get it that fucking, I'll get it that mad. I just take care of it. They were just under the sink in the bathroom. Well, you know, we found it. It's because he didn't really care.

Now they're gonna try to do it digitally. Like every kid just became an expert on VPNs. Yeah, right. And now dads are just going to try to subtly trick you into installing their porno credits. Yeah, it's how I watch the Dodgers. I'm just like glancing up the screen to seeing people challenging me to fight. No, Jesus, really. Let's rage in the cage did you, bro? It is not safe for women. Oh, this rhyming and alliteration. You're actually, you're actually like not current in the chat. If you were trying to keep up with it.

He was not. I remember when we had this, this condom regulation for, for porno's out here. Remember that? We had to vote on whether or not. Oh, yeah, yeah. We had to use condoms if you were shooting porn. Yeah.

Because it would totally ruin them. Like who wants to watch a porn? If you ever watched a porn with a condom on it. Yes. Unwatchable. It's weird. Yeah. It's weird.

It is gross. Yeah, I don't know. Somehow less of a reverse turn off. Like it's not sexy at all. Yeah, it is very strange. It makes the entire, it cheapens it. It cheapens the porno, forcing them to wear condoms. I remember when it passed, talking about it at dinner,

asking like, who the fuck would vote for this? My mom, of course, only one. Yeah. First one, well, yeah, I voted for it. Gotta be safe. Mom, why don't you work on your own house? Get your own house in order. First, I don't wear condoms, period. Aren't they tested?

Aren't porn stars tested all the fucking time? Yeah, they're probably safer than the average person out there. Take it to know what I do have a rage. What is it? Incessed porn is not convincing enough. Oh, here we go. Because you see it, it's always like a stepdad and his horny teen daughter or some shit.

And then you watch it and the guy's got a nine inch porno cock and she's obviously a porn star. You're like, that's not her stepdad. I don't believe it at all. Like at least try to make it convincing if you're gonna try to make something like CD and weird. Otherwise, it's just the title. There's no relationship to the video. It's illegal to make it convincing if you're going to try to make something like CD and weird. Otherwise, it's just the title. There's no relationship to the video.

And so legal to make it too convincing though. Is it? Yeah, you can't depict someone who even looks remotely like after talking to the credit card processors when I was when I was setting up the Patreon thing, they are very, they very explicitly have morality clauses. Like, you can't be, it can't actually be incised, it can't be too convincing, it can't be hate speech. Who screens every porn that comes out to judge all this? They do. They said you have to submit your entire site and everything on it to get in. And then once you

are in, they will continue the credit card company, the high risk processors. Oh, okay, charge 10% they cross the whole. I want to meet the guy they have in their building who has to sit there and watch porn all day and judge whether or not it's acceptable. Did you see the Facebook mod thing? The article on the people who have to do that at the Facebook, the content curators? No, I didn't see that.

So they sit there, these kids sit there all day and just watch people getting stabbed and like, you know, guys shitting on each other. Yeah. And all the gross, you know, worst, worst of the worst stuff that comes through Facebook. Do you have to be like, especially trained to handle this stuff? Or is it just some guy who's just now like, it's like, it's hurting Goren and like, knows the world is fucked.

That would be perfect. But instead they, they bring anybody on in this world where we pretend that everybody's that say they got like 20 year old girls in there who are having mental breakdowns because they're watching guys get murdered every day for $15 an hour. I could do that job. Of course you could. I could do that job. No problem.

No problem. I would have trouble with that job, honestly. You just be thinking about how much fucking murder is going on all the time. And people posing and posing and posing and the fuck of you is hilarious article. See, I just have, I don't have the illusion that we're anything other than fucking animals.

So none of that surprises me. That's why I listen to this show. So you guys can train me on how to think of the world as a scary fucking place. Because I don't know. The world just, people want to make more sense of it than can be made of it. Like, the world just is. People do what they do.

Some people just do shit, you know what I mean? And it's like, you've got to keep good, bad, all these fucking, all this morality out of it. Because at the end of the day, people just go fucking animal on each other. And you can't trust the systems that are in place to protect you from all that shit. You've gotta be, that's like, Yeah, they're not there for that.

That's what I think you stand for a lot, is that idea of like, I need to protect myself, and even in like my personality needs to be shaped in such a way that it protects me from this shit, because like, the world is way more fucked than what the people trying to tell you it's okay are going to let you know. People who talk about world peace, are you fucking kidding me? That phrase should never come out of your mouth.

That is the dumbest idea ever because it is one of the probably few impossible things that humankind could achieve like there's no fucking way. They're talking about themselves. They're flat out talking about themselves. Yeah, anybody who has any problem with anything or any kind of noble aspirations or altruism in them is just talking about themselves. The reality is most of the world can't eat. Yeah. Are you fixing that while you're saving

while you're dragging homeless people's dogs away from them in the name of rescuing them? No. Like while you're spasming out over lolly artwork online, are you feeding anybody with that? No. Then it's just entertainment. That's it.

You're either feeding people or entertaining them. If it's not food, it's entertainment for you. I've malaria, whatever, like the big killers. Yeah. People were just... Every time I see a scientist talk about going to Mars because then humanity will be harder to wipe out because it's in two places I want to strangle them. I don't care if they're halfway through curing cancer. I want a fucking strangle them

Yeah, you know what's gonna fuck up Mars is Harder to wipe out. It's gonna be people. Yeah, it's gonna be the same shit there Yeah, exactly It's gonna be more licenses to look, how are you gonna get a license to jack off on Mars? You're gonna send them up there with enough credits. The fact is, the UK would benefit from a little Islam. I'm starting to think.

Like, what? All right, justify the state. If I have to pick between one or the other, no porn jack off credits are praying to Allah five times a day, I'm picking Allah. Because I can at least lie about that. I know how religions work. You just fudge everything, like, ah, my brother.

Gabi Gabi Gabi. Salamu alaykum. Yeah, you just say that and everything's fine. I can't get around the porno credits one. Have you heard about the Chinese social point system? Yeah. How like if you buy a video game, your social credit goes down and shit.

And you can't fly. You can't buy, you can't buy plane flights if your social score is too low. It's fucking. That's like, that's what I fear the most is like, you hear about stuff happening in the UK, but it's like China's more powerful and even more

lack of free will I guess Yeah, it's like if they if that permeated through the world it would be pretty scary for any We have the same thing we have the same thing. We're just building it Dynamically, we're just building it in a distributed way in every house in America. We're building the same goddamn system Google is a thought. I yeah, I don't know. I think we are. We just love it. The one, we just love oppressing each other. So fucking weird.

It's true. It is, like that is really the white man's biggest pastime. Oppressing. If you say whoever he can. Sure. Yeah, he sits around for two longs like, well, there's nobody left to him. I just better start impressing myself. Yeah, I've been jacking off too much.

I need to go ahead and treadmill. I haven't burned enough. I haven't got my 20 minutes of activities. So I need a $500 watch to tell me to fucking walk more. Thank you, white man. They do. They get off on it. Yeah, I think you're right. Not enough weirdness

in my religion. I need a weirder religion that tells me to go do more things. Other white people are like, what's that? You got a weird system that where you tell yourself to do odd things. I'm telling you more about it. Yeah. They do, don't they? Does anybody else do that? I don't know. I don't see Chinese people sitting around pressing themselves. I don't know. All right. What else do I get out here?

I've been meaning to bring this one in for a little bit, so I thought it was interesting. Friend of mine. Oh, God, I gotta talk about Jamie Marci too. Friend of mine is very pregnant. I'll just, I'll read the article that I found first. It kind of ties in if I could find it. Here we go. The anti-mom bias. Nearly 25% of mothers go back to work within two weeks of giving birth. Do you know that? No, in this country.

In this country. To give you a sense of where human mothers fall on the legal protection hierarchy, it is illegal to separate a dog from her newborn puppies before eight weeks in several states two months. I thought that was funny. It's dumb, but it is funny that dogs have more dog mothers have more legal protection. White people priorities. Yeah, really, it really fucking is. Yeah. These are this, like, with 100% this is white people. It is, it is remarkable to me how, how much we do not care about mothers and newborns. This is how fucking little kids we are.

This is how fucked our priorities are. That's right. I started digging into a little bit and it became personal for me after I read this study. Some companies are giving paternity leave though. Now, so. Yeah, yeah. A friend of mine, eight weeks pregnant,

or sorry, eight months pregnant, ready to pop, got laid off. So because companies are incentivized because of tax write-offs to buy healthcare for employees, which They don't get companies can't just write off anything they buy for you Yeah, a company can't buy you a car and then write off $40,000 Yeah, that's not how this tax system works But they can buy you health care and write it off because the government wants maximum say in what because healthcare companies

Want to want max want all the legislation go their way. Right? They want the most. Right. Because in all honesty, people wouldn't buy health insurance if they didn't get it for free. Like if you didn't get it from work, they just wouldn't buy it because it's too fucking confusing.

They'd have a lot more questions. Yes. Put it that way. Correct. If everybody had to buy health insurance on their own, they would say, hold up. They'd have a lot more questions. Yes. Put it that way. Correct. If everybody had to buy health insurance on their own, they would say, hold up. Why am I, I'm a single 20 year old man? There's no chance of, there's no chance of me getting hurt or having, there's no chance

of me having a kid. Why am I paying for this? The company's what have, health insurance companies would have to compete a lot more. Oh, yeah. So they convinced the government to let companies ride it off. Oh, yeah. Then nobody has any questions. No. Companies would have, health insurance companies would have to compete a lot more. So they convinced the government to let companies ride it off, then nobody has any questions.

Companies get it too for free. Oh, you got it, you work here? Guess what, you get sick health care benefits. How come it's, how long do I get them? Well, as long as you're working here, we'll give them to you how much they cost. Don't worry about that. Don't worry about that.

All you have to pay is 300. What's the total cost? Don't worry about it. Don't worry about that. All you have to pay is 300. What's the total cost? Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. And you get to pick from these one of three options that are exactly the same somehow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So because of that, she gets late, my friend gets laid off,

instantly loses everything. They say, well, you know what? We'll cover one more month of your health insurance. After that, you're on Cobra. Cobra, yeah. We don't know how much Cobra costs, not insurance. After that, you're on co-oper. Co-oper. We don't know how much co-oper costs, not our problem. Right, right. That's where our, that's where our government subsidies end.

That's where our tax incentive ends, so we don't care. Right. So she's stuck with no job and a kid ready to come. And she's married, but she was the one with health care, because the other guy is an entrepreneur. Right. And if you don't work for a giant corporate, if you don't work for a corporation, but she was the one with healthcare because the other guy is an entrepreneur. And if you don't work for a giant corporate, if you don't work for a corporation,

your healthcare situation is so fucked that it makes no sense for you to compete with the cabal that is the health insurance corporateocracy that runs our country. It's just it makes sense for her to have it. So now he's stuck with a pregnant wife, which I'm sure is a pre-existing condition, with a salary cut in half, needing health insurance now.

Yeah. Or else what? You give birth on the street. I don't know. You go to, you go to fucking county or whatever. Shocking. Shocking to me. By the way, this is, I was talking to Asterios

on the way to an audition, trying to help him out with his stuff. I still do commercial auditions, so I think it's funny when people see me in an airport and they're like, dude, what's up? I don't talk about it though, because they'll get fucked with.

Gotcha. On the way to an audition, talking to a stereo is about how miserable his situation is. Yeah, yeah, where he's raking in Patreon money with a bit right, and who knows whatever unemployment or whatever else. On the way home from that audition,

talking to this girl who's laughing about it, because what, what else can you do? How else could you get so colossally fucked as to get laid off with a month to go before popping out a kid, and then you have nothing. Nothing. Yep. Not a goddamn thing waiting to help you.

Other than WIC, I brought in some stats. WIC, seven million participants, you know, the women and whatever kids, children, food stamps, snap, serve seven million people, including almost half of all infants born in the US. The federal program costs for WIC totaled $5 billion. In 2017, what is that pre-Kid? We do some quick math, thousand bucks a kid. program costs for WIC totaled $5 billion in 2017. What is that, pre-kid?

We do some quick math, thousand bucks a kid. Is that about right? 1200 bucks. No, no, I'm sorry. That's like 800 bucks a kid, isn't it? Am I stupid? Is this math right? Don't try to make me do an F.

You know what, honestly, I didn't even listen to those numbers you read off. Yeah, of course, that's why they do that. Yeah. Seven billion, where's my stat? Seven billion, I don't know, five billion, five billion. And seven billion. Seven million.

Seven hundred and fourteen dollars per kid. What could you do with, I couldn't survive three days with that. No, no. Are you fucking serious? Meanwhile, to put it in perspective, because you know, I like to do that. What else is the show for? The government spends $80 billion on college. So fuck the kids when they're one or two or three, but man, as soon as they start learning about intersectionality and art history and language arts and Japanese, studying Japanese for four years, whatever the fuck else, not getting math degrees and then claiming that they got math degrees for the rest of their life.

As soon as they're ready to participate in the giant scam that is student loan, they're there to help out, they're there. Oh, you guys want money for that, but when you're a fucking baby, like when you need all the help you can get to set you up for the rest of your life, the government for God's sake, if we have it, should exist to help the very unlucky. If you happen to be born stupid, I'm fine with giving you money.

If you can't fit the square block in the circle hall, you'll get congratulations. You won the idiot lottery. Here's some money to live to eat. Because if you were born a baby, you are the idiot lottery with the square in the circle hole. That's crazy. If you can't crave it in there, congratulations buddy.

Here's some, you get fast food for the rest of your life. Amazon Whole Foods will be delivered every week at your door. Just popped hearts, don't worry, you don't have to work the oven. We'll give you a nice corrugated iron storage container to live in. You don't have to worry about shit because you are an idiot. Well, here's the first thing. Fine with that. First, you have to.

Wait, let me finish that. And if you happen to be unlucky enough to be born a baby, guess what? I've got some money for you too because the system has fucked you. The system has totally let you down and because preferring to pay ass loans of money at the end when you can when your skull is strong enough to serve as a cog in the machine or dumping it into the Middle

East. What was our budget for that? $500 billion a year for the army or something like that. Kids get a one percent of that. Yeah. Yeah. I was going to say first, first we have to admit that there is a percentage of society that just cannot do any kind. They can't. And we're not going to admit that. And when people are unlucky, Sean, you get brain cancer, that's unlucky.

Yeah, that's unlucky. And if we're looking at it morally, we all, we have to agree that you, there are things in life that you cannot control that are unlucky. Yeah. Fuck yeah. Any fired when you're eight months pregnant, where you're the, where you're the health care provider, that is unfuck and lucky. And we can all, we're a lottery society. God damn it. We all love the lottery. We would play it every day. We would all have it. We would live the lottery. It's the only true accomplishment

that we respect as people is winning the lottery. Working for something. Tell it somewhere else, buddy. Tell me about the time you lucked out because that could be me. All this hard work. Never gonna be me. It's the great equalizer.

But luck, I'll listen to a luck story all day, the unlucky, the unlucky we should, for God's sake, strive to protect a little more than 1%. Yeah. You know, I think hard work is just rolling the dice over and over again. Yeah. That's all it is. But for me personally, that's my career. It's like I can make videos all the time, maybe one 20th of those get big enough to pay my bills.

Yeah. A lot of them, nobody fucking watches. So it's like I can work as hard as I want on any individual video as nothing to do with whether it's successful, pure luck. And we're more like, No, that's an interrupt to do. No, that's what you talk about being unlucky,

being born a baby. I already said it that we have to admit that there's a certain percentage of the population that just can't do anything. And we have to figure out what to do with them. You give them money. Give them money. They don't have to be integrated into the workforce.

They'll be, yeah, we don't all have to pretend. Right, that's the thing. We don't need another detriment to the machine. We've been pretending too long. Just take care of them. We pretended on too many things, and then it took over. And then the dream, the pretending became real. Yeah. And now we've got, now we've got to go to the store

and buy jack-off credits. Yeah. Is what happened to us? Incidentally, Dick. I based on your advice have never bought health, as I am a 28-year-old entrepreneur. And that's why I'm not fighting any of you motherfuckers. I'm going to make those guys fight each other to fight you.

Yeah, we're going to put together a Budo Kai, a 10-Kaiichi Budo Kai of everybody. You ever watching Dragon Ball Z? No, but is that like blood sport? I understand that. It's just big tournament. Every fucking big guy in the whole universe all fights each other to see who's the biggest guy. And you're going to be the Shen Siu at the end.

He's sitting in a throne watching all, yeah, Shen Long watching these guys fight, reading your lolly pornography, perusing it. Excuse me. He's going to get his big throne carried in by a bunch of preschoolers. Like 50 on him lifting up the... Sorry, that was a cheap shot. Do you ever, I told Mumke to call in today, do you guys still talk?

You and Mumke, John's now, do you hate each other? I don't know if I hate him, but... You guys were doing stuff together? Yeah, we had a podcast. That's right, that's right. In stuff for a full social media, but argument podcast. And stuff for both social media argument, the podcast, which Asterios was on a couple of times and now him and Mumki

do a show together again. That right. Yeah. Mumki was pretty hard on you with the lolly stuff, wasn't he? I don't know. I think he was just, he's hard on everybody all the time. Yeah. He's just a dick.

I didn't see that much of it. I did think that it was, there's a bit of irony in I think what I perceived to be Mumpke getting de-platformed for the same thought crimes that you get. I mean, that's why he and I were associated with each other. We both were just like super edgy dudes on YouTube, but like edgy in a different way. And for him, it was the Elliott Roger shit that, like, I mean, the theory is that it was like a FBI take down

or something. So, thankfully, I don't talk about anything violent. It just defend lolliporn and say, say words I can't say on this show. and just defend lolliporn and save, save words. I can't say on this show. It's, yeah, I mean, it's, I brought in a news story the other week that I didn't read, but it was, the increased surveillance

like every street corner had a camera on it and San Diego and a microphone. And they were experimenting like this. What's the experiment that you can get away, that no one will care and that you did it and then you're going to do it again. In a society where everything is surveilled constantly, the freaky shit because all they have to do is flip the switch and say, well, this word, now you can't say that word anymore.

It's only scary to me because the way we treat what's wrong is so monumentally fucked up. Like if the laws were fine, I would have no problem with 100% surveillance. Look at me all the fucking time. I don't care because I'm not doing anything illegal. Well, I'll stop doing, no, because I'm not doing anything illegal, but the things I'm doing that are illegal are wrong or they're not. They shouldn't be. Right. Exactly. So be. Right, exactly. So the surveillance is a problem. But if the, I guess what I'm saying. That's always gonna be the case.

Like that's why you can't want a government like that. Because no matter what, if somebody is making the decisions and you disagree with the decisions being made, that's why we don't have a government like that. Somebody's gonna push back at some point. There's like a threshold that if you cross, if you ban this thing, that's the line that's going to get crossed. And if we found ourselves in a situation where like 80% of everybody agreed on one set of rules, that other 20% are fucked.

And I feel like just by defending Lollicon, I fall into that like 20% of the people who even the other edgy guys are not willing to say that they stand up for this or are against it. And it's like, to me, it's just, it's just the line should be very clear that there should be, if there's a victim in something, then it's a crime. If there is no victim, there is no crime. And if everybody's not, if there's even one guy that does not support that, then the surveillance system is a huge problem because he's eventually going to be in charge of it.

What you said, when you called in after that lolly gate, you said that you have to explain how your friends with me to some people. I said something like, well, this is a, that's very uncomfortable. You said, how the fuck do you think I feel having to explain being friends with you to my friends? Because that's true. I met a fan on Huntington Beach just yesterday, because that's where I'm staying at. And he is, you know, trans furry, like, new me because I used to be a my little pony YouTuber

before I was an anime guy. So like, a lot of my audience is trans kids. And a lot of the trans community is very communist, very socialist politically. And like, there's so much crossover in that click that like, I have fans who are like, because I'm very pro trans, you know, so like, I have trans kid fans, a lot of them, but like the less men out there, the less competition. And I'm not particularly political. I'm like, if anything, I'm just very libertarian, but I don't care about left or right politics

that much. But, you know, being on your show and then parroting things that you say here and there or razor fist. I don't know if you. I know that. Yeah. I'm a huge fan of him as well. So like, if I say any of you guys as talking points, it's like the kids who watch me are like, oh boy, you know, like we're going to get shit for liking this guy because he associates with Dick Masterson and razor fisted shit, you know, but I don't give a fuck. I'm like, take or leave it.

I'm gonna say whatever I want, you know. Well, there was this picture that I posted a couple days ago from the magic tournament where Dick had Carl, I don't know, Carl man's, he brought his kids to the magic show and I took a picture with his son, Gavin, who said he's sent a letter in before. I took a picture with his son.

Let me open it up here. His son has sent in a letter. Yeah his son sent in a letter saying that Maddox is a loser. Oh, oh wait a minute I think I remember that. This one. So this picture is a cute picture right? Yeah, but somebody said and they're right he's got like the kid drew a picture of, um, my no, kind of, boy, Yeah, I'm really indoctrinating him.

Well, then somebody said, you know, in, in many circles, this is as offensive as that Gavin, the, that, that cross-dressing kid next to a naked guy. Sure. And I thought, yeah, that's a hundred. That is that picture would be horrifying. Yes. To people, a large, even the mustache would be offensive to them. I know.

Everything's offensive to somebody in the same way that everything's a fetish for somebody. Yeah. Right. I think, are you touching that kid? I am. Yeah. See, that's, I mean, I'm not there. I'm out.

I don't have a hand. Sean, I don't have my hand. Yeah. Yeah. Jesus Christ. Yeah. Sean, I have my hand. Yeah, yeah. Jesus Christ. But there you go. I guess my only point was if we don't have this, if we don't have that,

if we don't have the idea that the actions and victims are what make a crime and that's it, then we're fucked because we got a lot of people who are really upset about shit that it has no victim and is not a crime. We have too much time on our hands and the government is working to make everything wrong. Too much thought and you know intention control.

All right, let me get so fun here, she probably has an opinion about it. But let's just go to the bathroom. Go to the bathroom, did you? Go to the, actually I don't want you in the room and so if calls in, get the, yeah, we're putting a room condom on, right? You know what else, you know what else makes me rage? What's that? Night time birds.

Do you, uh, my time birds, okay, go fuck themselves. Okay, there's mocking birds around this time of year. Is that what it is? Do you have a bird that's always around the same place that changes his calls all the time? Yeah, I thought it was a ton of different birds. No, it's a mucking bird. They're fucking assholes. They'll do it all fucking night and they'll change. It's amazing how many different calls those mother fuckers have.

Dude, I'm fucking. Oh, yeah. I'm putting on an Elmer Fud hat and I'm shooting him dead because it's driving me insane. I already can't sleep because my comforters all tangled up and my fitted sheet doesn't fit all the way around. So it springs up around the corners. I can't listen to funny YouTube videos because 80s girls asleep because she gets up at five in the morning to go to Pilates and then work. I'm too fat to get out of bed and go up to the living room to watch shit by myself. And then I got this bird twirling and chipping his ass off

outside all fucking night. He's having a conversation with him. He's having like a 12 bird conversation with himself. With himself. Yes. Just talking to himself. Oh, they're the worst. Having his own bird podcast outside.

Right outside of my bedroom, it's driving me crazy. So, so if you there Yep, so what's up? What's up? How you doing? I'm doing really well actually. I'm really excited to be on Thanks for calling in. I'm really excited to have you on. I love your video I'm gonna play a little bit for everybody right now so they can I do a, I do a really bad job of introducing people. So if I leave anything out, let me know. I'm just like full to beyond.

You're, you're how old you 14? Yeah, 14. Okay, let me pull up this video now. I got sent this video, but. My way for learning institution. I got sent this video. I like this, I like this already. Yeah, I got sent this video by but... I'm sorry for learning institution. I got sent this video by... I like this, I like this already. Yeah, I got sent this video by multiple people.

Coach included, so. It's called suicide bomb. It's called suicide bomb. It's about the, it's about the condition of public schooling or public education for kids, right? Mm-hmm. So, by the way, this is Digi-Bro. Also on with us, I don't know if you're,

I don't know if you know who Digi-Bro is. Okay, here we go, this is Digi Bro. Also on with us, I don't know if you're, I don't know if you know who Digi Bro is. Okay, here we go, it's called Suicide Bomb. We've got so in a prison uniform speaking directly to the camera, here we go. My spite for learning institutions is exceeding the time I spend in them and increasingly disproportionate amounts. The first time I read about the kids

who shot up their high school, I simply couldn't understand it. Why would they wait until high school? Every year, I was trying to reach the goals of the victim and mother's chest and shoot by the bus flowed into the state of the vaccination camps,

whose authority figures come just sort of prison warns. Cause finding me with every year, the reason not to put them out of their collective misery before they can add up in their heads becomes more and more mysterious to me. The vitality I once brandished dished windows like ice under a hot bulb. Do you buy these? It's like a real sibling. And when I ask myself why are you still here, I get no answer.

This is the sister I wish I had. It's a really dreadful gallery of discomfort. Among the insistent demands that I surrender all of my firearms and smile longingly upon the incoming droves of Muslim men. Anything you see in a weapon and something you see in your mouth and your face. And raising it with my bare fists. One thing and one thing only manages to keep my morale high. A dingy piece of paper taped to the bathroom wall telling me not to kill myself.

What was on the cake? Oh my god, you are funny beyond your years. It's, it's 13 minutes of that. Do you write all that? Yes, I do. I work with my, pretty much my best friend online. He lives in Brazil. He's vapor a boy on YouTube.

He's 16 and we, I pretty much like right up the drafts, I get like all the ideas over like a month or so into a script. And then we like go back in on a discord call together and like just make it like super succinct and like punchy and just like like. I mean, you deserve a MacArthur grant. Like I've never, I've never heard anything like that, especially from a 14-year-old, not to be condescending, but Jesus. Well, you've been doing this for a while, right? Like, haven't you been on YouTube for years? Yeah, but a lot of people do a lot of things for a while and aren't good at it.

I've heard a lot of people talking only one time, I've ever heard it put like that. I'm going to play a little bit more, self. The level of this, there's a reason a little bit more self. A level of this. There's a reason a racer's don't work in your heart and that's because who you are and who you're born wanting to love, isn't a mistake. Is being living around my school with exactly what you'd expect self-righteous teenagers to find deep.

Ultimately, their objective is to propagandize that unhappiness isn't a proper reaction to the school hassle. Instead, you should just passively accept the fact that your government owned invoids stuck in a glorified POW camp. So you might as well just put your feet in the stirrup and try not to whimper as a stranger changes your diaper for the next half a decade. But the campaigns were actually about suicide, they would be distributed around office faces and nursing homes, since the brunt of suicides are committed by older men.

As opposed to teenage girls, as you are led to believe. But of course, the true motive of the campaigning is to put a bandaid on the public school system's issues. Most of the posters consist of vain truisms about self-image and fat phobia, as if the lumbering large buckets of America were in all 30 something year olds. And as if some hand-beast or stardiano bones is going to become healthy off of shit or wisdom. And as there's some hand-beast, there's still the anabones is going to become healthy off of sugar wisdom. This is like a maddox video, but funny. Yeah, it really is.

So you have a problem with school self, is that? Yes, I do. It's got a right one to know, too. What's that? Say that again? It's pretty much my main problem. It's your main problem. The editing is incredible too. Do you do all that? I do that myself. You do that.

I'm speechless. I'm still trying to swallow all these red pills that I'm getting. That legitimately got me three times. Wow, Jesus Christ. You can express certain ideas, certain similar ideas, but to say it, that succinctly is, it's like craftsmanship.

You made me, so if you made me feel like I was back in school again, reminded me of how much I really hated it. What do your parents think of all this? You probably get asked that a lot. My parents are actually pretty much fine with it. Like from the time that I first got a lot of traction, they were pretty much just like,

okay, they were fine with it. They just let me do it. And you know, yeah. Yeah. Was this stuff always so written and edited and pointed? Or because I don't know if it's you who I'm thinking of, but I remember seeing just like more along the lines of edgy screaming from uh, from someone your age before.

Well, yeah, I am over time I've gotten better and like I put more time into my videos. I mean, like back in 2016, like I had a few hundred thousand subscribers, but all I was really doing is took like a couple hours to make a video. And I would just like pick whatever was popular on like the YouTube commentary community and just like talk about it. And it was pretty bad, it was pretty, but like it was the novelty factor of like how young I was is what I was doing it that got people now

like it's shocking. It was shocking. Right, because my liberal friends used to watch them ironically just to like watch those videos ironically. They secretly like them. No, they love them. Yeah, they love them.

But I don't even know how you can watch that one ironically. Like that is the truest shit. Well, that's why I was asking, because it seems like a lot more structured and written and pointed now. Yeah, that's being like, actually trying to make real points.

And, you know, do your teachers watch it? Has any of you sent this to any of your teachers? They've had somebody's head who have seen it. Yeah. I want to go to their house and make them watch it. I'll be really happy to see what you're doing. You see what you're doing. Take, I would be concerned about that

because I almost got expelled from school for something I wrote kind of like this in high school. Was it kind of like this? Or was it kind of like what was it? It was just I'd just been assigned to write an essay that was like about a time I had failed at something in the style of one of the writers we had read and I'd read George Orwell. So I wrote like an Orwellian story about me not wanting to do my homework. And at some point there's references to to suicide or someone texting me telling me,

like, well, don't stab your teacher or something. Like, I wrote that in the story. And yeah, like the teacher freaked out and I almost got kicked out of school. Thankfully, I didn't. But, you know, what happened? Having careful with it, your teachers see the videos where you're talking about school to play. No, you want to have a...

You want to have a suicide bomb as the title of the video. You want to be a victim these days. You want to get expelled. You get national media attention for it. Oh, she would probably do a lot of money on Patreon if she got expelled from school for what she said. Yeah, well, maybe a new project too, rather. What is it like at school for you, so?

Well, I actually moved this year to California. I lived in New York all my life, and I had a couple problems with my school regarding videos because I've talked about school a lot before, and it was a couple videos where I was mentioning specific events that took place like bullying type things. And I didn't use exact names, I used first names, and they pretty much made me take down like two of my videos.

When you say bullying type things, were you talking, were you exposing bullies or were you doing the bullying? Well, I was, I was sort of like exposing bullies because I was talking about, you know, like, insecure kids who are like, uh, picking on others for like bullshit reasons and that sort of thing. And then there was another time where I really could have fucked myself over because I wrote something like along the lines of the this like the suicide bomb video script in like a ELA test. I really didn't want to do it but my parents made me take the test because you can opt out.

So you'll show them. So on one of the answers, I, instead of like writing a response to whatever like bullshit, like reading, understanding question, I just, I just wrote ideas like the ones on this script. And it like, I don't know something I said that was like along the lines of like, I have a gun and like, I know if these teachers live. Well, potentially could raise a flag today. Yeah. You're supposed to even burst the night in your school.

So I guess you don't have anything to worry about. That's great. We have to come to California. I mean, I always say the one thing I regret about being young is not committing more crimes. Yeah. We can't always look back. You. Yeah. You always look back. You beg back. You're like invincible.

Mm-hmm. Especially as a girl. And they could have more leeway. They could have more leeway. They could have more leeway. They could have more leeway. They could have more leeway more leeway. Yeah.

So you took the ELA test and then your parents learned to never make you do anything you didn't want to do. Well, it was eighth grade, and that's the last year that you have to take it. But I had a month later, the counselor called me down in the office and I was like, oh God, I know exactly what this is about. And she just talked to me in there,

the typical man, or like, well, what do you mean by this? And are you okay? Is everything okay at home? And so like that. Yeah, and what are you gonna do do about it if it's not bitch? Yeah, get another some other idiot involved right? No, thank you. Right, right. I'm curious. Are you with clearly you don't like school? Are you actually planning to finish high school? Uh, yeah, well, yeah, I have to if you like want to get anything done in this world is pretty much

necessary to get to finish high school Yeah, yeah, I was just wasn't sure because a lot of people who become internet creators if they get I want to get anything done in this world is pretty much necessary to get to finish high school, which kind of sucks. Yeah, I was just wasn't sure, because a lot of people who become internet creators, if they get enough money, they might just skate, you know? Bounce out of high school. Yeah, like ego raptor, big famous animation guy, he just dropped out of high school

because he was getting animation gigs from like MTV and shit off of his YouTube work. Huh, how about that? So, do you want to turn this into a career? I don't know what career, I guess the career is like giving, I don't know either, but it's been like a plan of mind for a while to do that. And that's why I've been like trying so hard to like,

to get better at writing and get better at editing and doing all that stuff. But I'm not sure exactly what career because it's not really like I could get on television or anything like that. Or really like for television. Yeah, what do you mean? Probably.

There's gonna be no televisions, dead. Yeah. What's gone? Boomers watch television, that's about it. No, no, I mean, my parents can't even listen this fast. She could, I'm just saying she could write. Yeah. For creative content.

Yeah, let me just so everybody knows, you have 800,000 subscribers on you. Oh, yeah. I mean, she could easily, if she had a Patreon and with the views she pulls, she could definitely have a full time career with the size of her audience. I have a full time career and I have less than half her subscribers. I was planning to set up a Patreon, which I'm going to announce in the video that I'm writing right now. Oh, yeah. Next one. Yeah. You can be. Yeah. You'll probably be making like,

what's it gonna be, patreon.com slash what, self? I guess so. You guess so? Yeah. Um, what was the, what was your climb like from nothing to 800,000? That's a lot. Did you start at like 11? Yeah.

Were you 11 years old? Yeah, I was, well, I started starting making videos when I was nine, but I first got any traction when I was 11. Wow. It was actually this exact day that like paracinacal, you know, gave me a shout out. He was a big commentary guy and like a couple million subscribers.

And he like, somebody posted my video to a subreddit was a big commentary guy and a couple million subscribers. And he like somebody posted my video to a subreddit, and he like noticed that I made a video about me, and that's like, I got like 100,000 subscribers in like two days. So it was really like, really fast, and I don't know if it was really deserved. Well, no, it was deserved, because I've rarely watched a video on it. And guess what?

You don't have to worry about whether it was deserved or not. Lots of things are undeserved. Just use that as another point to jump off from. What's like, I don't know, what's like the nexus of your clear, of your evident rage that you have here? What turned you into this red-pilling monster? That way, see. Well, I don't know, probably, probably somewhat to do with just adolescent hormones, probably

online. Because, yeah. Are you just on a poll or a lot of what? Are you big on poll or what? Well, I mean, yeah, it's kind of obvious. All right. Stupid. Okay. Adolescent Mormons.

I don't know what's poll is. The political board of fortune. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm there all the time. Dicks out there, actually. Yeah. Oh, God, I don't even know what. After watching this video, I feel like I know you so well. School sucks.

Yeah, I'm a big anti-school person myself. I have a lot of podcasts about hating school. Do not support college in any way. Don't go. It's bad because it's like now I see or I pass that age where I see who's teaching. And I think I wouldn't, I wouldn't trust you to do literally anything. No. And now and you're warping kids' minds.

Teachers, a lot of them are people who literally they just like can't conceive of themselves not being in school. And so they don't, they don't ever leave school. Well, that right. But yeah, they just go from school back to school. I say the same thing. They don't fucking anything at all. Yeah. Yeah. And they're in shitloads of debt. So you don't want to listen to them from money advice. Like, they can't teach you anything helpful that you really need to know. No. What are you going to say, Sean? I was going to say, I work on,

you know, I work on animated series, there's child actors all the time. So anybody under 18 needs an on set teacher. They don't do anything, they just sit there. Occasionally they go, we should probably give them a break. We're like, read week-to-week, we could be into them. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's just,

it's not to teach them, it's just to be there as like their advocate. They're a piece of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what it is. That's just to be there as like their advocate for, yeah, yeah, that's what it is. That's what teaching is. Well, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. So they, I was talking to one of them and we were talking about, I don't know,

she was probably like, you know, mid, mid late 40s, something like that. And you know, teachers are, teachers generally are pretty liberal. Yeah. And she was just going off about the indoctrination in college and how worthless college is. Yeah.

And she could not get it. I was like, wow, like I was very surprised to hear that from her. From a teacher? Yeah. So, so if you move from New York to, do you say California or LA? Yeah, California. Oh man, you're going to really hate it here. Oh yeah.

We've been here for like three days and the amount of like liberalism is like astounding. Well, it's different than everywhere else though. So what's your thoughts on it so far, California? Well, at least the weather is better, but there's definitely more political messaging in the school. Oh yeah. The teachers who don't like know what they're talking about at all. Which is great because you can stall class time

by arguing with that. That's the problem. Oh man, you are, that has taken me back. I had an economics class. This is your sister. Yeah, I had an economics class in high school and I would purposely, like 10th grade. I would purposefully start

controversial topics in the first five minutes of class to like keep it going. And one day, one day my friend and I, the two on express, we really didn't want to do any classwork that day. So we were panicking and trying to come up with something and I said, hey, what about like, what about how men have invented pretty much everything

and women aren't that into science? And what would you say about the, would you say that men contribute more to science and women are a conversation? The teacher stopped the class, oh yeah, yeah. And lectured me that if I ever said anything like that in her class again,

I would go straight to the principal's office. It's so threatening to her. Oh, shit. To hear that. Just this old C word. I should send her a copy of my book. What was her name? I don't even.

I don't remember. I don't remember. What have you seen from your teachers? So. Well, there's just been like, you know, actually the most recent one was like my English teacher, we're talking about immigration because we're reading this book called Enrique's Journey. It's like, you know, it's supposed to tug at your heartstrings about like, you know, illegal immigrants and how

just let them all in or something like that. And he like took out like, um, I think like Trump Jr. tweet or something that was something, there was some comparison between Syrian refugees and skittles and how you wouldn't take a handful if it was three-yard poisons or something. And he was just saying, this is so, this is dehumanizing them. I can't believe you would do this. This is your teacher saying this? Yeah, yeah. It's called a metaphor. Yeah, fuck sake. And then what happened? Doesn't like skittles, obviously. And then he was like pulling out like statistics that were like, actually none of them are

terrorists, but nothing including like the crime rates or anything like that. Yeah, just straight up, bad. Like statistics are very... Has nothing to do with English. Yeah, oh yeah, right. So, and you know, that's one of the things that you you, you know, you torture the numbers. They'll tell you anything you want to hear. Yeah. Are they like, do they push you to take a certain lesson from what they make you read? I think so. Yeah. Because like, I also had it in a class called social issues where we

watch this documentary called misrepresentation, which is all about how the media is just so misogynistic and portrays women as sex objects and that's what we should intervene in that. Oh yeah, we're doing that. We made all those chicks get Instagram and post half-naked pictures themselves at the beach. Yeah, there's a couple that they're so vain. Like, Jesus man. half-naked pictures themselves at the beach. That's so mean. Like Jesus, man. I'm so sorry for doing that. Mm.

To every woman with an Instagram account of anyway, sorry. Social issues is the name of the class. Yeah. So half of it is like liberal topics. The other half is like the fucking sex ed. Yeah. Jesus Christ. What a mess. What do you think? What? So for you, I've always

thought this. Tell me if you agree with me that high IQ people get short changed in school, that they're left like exactly like you say in your video to just rot in prison while all the dumb-dums around them are taught not how to not sniff glue and given a given a collection of memes that they can repeat for the rest of their fucking lives about Hitler or Beowulf or whatever like simplistic paint by numbers primary color um, I mean because they can say. The only type of intelligence that school cares about is the ability to pass tests and have college skills and to continue down that road. But if you are intelligent in a way that is not like that, if you could have a career

doing something other than that, it's like they don't know what to do with you. They only have these certain prescribed paths. And those are particularly in today's world where there's so much you can do. There's so many new systems being built just through technology that like, school's not training anybody to do what I do, you know, which I'm glad for is that I don't have that much competition. But like, you know, imagine if they would just give it a decade. You're kind of going to have a dedicated school so it's a lolly drawing yeah I could do that yeah I don't know what do you think about what do you think about the plight of high IQ kids in

school so I think it's a huge national resource that we're just squandering yeah I think it's um well you can't like they they attempted to just like shove the spectrum of like like straight up like crayon eating retards to like 150 IQ Like way ahead of their grade type people and they try to like shove them all into one classroom Just doesn't work, but they simplified it because they're so lazy. Yeah, and the high IQ kids Yeah, they're really are tortured because they have to sit for seven hours and like stare at a wall like they're in solitary confinement or something. And they're missing crayons.

Yeah, the kids next to them. Yeah. That's the worst. Uh, it is the worst. Um, yeah, what do you think about, um, I don't know, what do you think about stuff like, uh, what do you think about, uh, like the trans movement or anything like that? What's a Gen Z take on all this multi-gender shit? I haven't looked much into all the other genders as for transgender people. I'm, well, my best friend last year was actually transgender.

I have no problem with then, you know, when they're adults taking hormones and doing surgeries and whatever, because that's their choice if they want to, you know, to have those surgeries and stuff, but I would be very wary about, like, administering those sorts of things to children and, like, having children take hormones because I just don't, like, we don't know enough yet. Yeah. What is it like? That's the best answer. Pretty good. I think, well, we don't know enough yet. Yeah. What is it like? That's the best answer. It's pretty good to see. Well, we don't know enough yet. Yeah. About, you know, because- That's offensive though. That's offensive too.

Well, I know, but just the fact that they, the fact that the concept, you tell me, I don't know in the past. Well, we have to realize that, like when your brain's not done, your brain's not done, it's still cooking. Yeah. Fuck you, maybe, forget.

What's it like walking around school with an 800,000 subscriber YouTube channel? You just swing it out there or what like to people? I can't even imagine because I didn't get it till right after high school. Is it like being like the Don and the godfather part two like the bag where people are like, oh Don's so feel like to people give you reverence or what? Do they? Well, it is like I even like moving. I couldn't really escape it because like, according to analytics, like, of demographics

California is like the most like watch time in the state. So of course, like the first day of school, like, there is somebody who recognized me or just spread through the school. So pretty much like every day, I got people like, saying hello, they might be on the show stuff. Or something like that in the halls. Do they like you? I got to imagine there's a lot of kids

at different politics from you who want to kick your ass. Yeah, I mean, teachers probably, teachers get usually a probably worse than the fucking students. Right, I'm sure they are. What are the kids like who like agree with you and don't agree with you Do you have like a I don't know a haters squad? I mean not really I mean people just say hi to me I just I Nobody is really talking to me further than that outside of my it's only 30 old men like me who are fawning over

It's like all thank God, a woman and a kid is saying this stuff. I can't imagine that a lot of the kids her age even get what the hell she's talking about and some of this shit. Really? You don't think so? I think a lot of them don't think about it. What do you think so?

Let's move quick. The kids get what you're talking about or? I think they get it and they relate to it. And I would go as far as to say, just based on some of the comments I get when I still had comments, like got them taken away from me. Really? I was wondering about that. Why? It's the new policy that like miners within a vague age range cannot have comments on

their videos. That's actually what my new videos partially about. Oh man. That was one of the funniest things when I went to the Watch Sof's video, it was age restricted. I had to sign in and prove it's like, it's a 14, this is a kid, but I have to be 18. Yeah, it's this kid's video, but you gotta be 18 to watch it. I think you're supposed to technically be 13

to even upload to YouTube. Oh yeah. Yeah, she's the dude that said she was a dive. So I'm surprised you haven't gotten taken down considering the shit you talk about. Well, you can put stuff in the about section like it's the channels owned by your parents or something and they can't technically get you down. Do you get a lot of weirdos? Not at all actually.

Really? Not as much as people would expect. Yeah, I would expect a lot. Why do I get so many weirdos? I think we know. Yeah, there's so many weirdos. Did you, bro? What's your life like when you're not doing these videos?

Like, what do you do? Normal kids, shit. I don't know. What do they go to? You go to the arcade and play NBA jam. Is that what kids are doing? Yeah, that's what kids are doing out is yeah, oh Well, I'm pretty much inside as much as I can be like outside of school because school is just too much to be like

Expo, I mean, it's a lot of Gen Zers that are cool, but it's a lot of like You know half naked like child process who's walking around that Yeah, I just spend some time at home in like being cathartic and like playing Minecraft to knock it traumatized. Oh, yeah. Do you think, do you agree with me that the Gen Z being conservative is overblown? Like I think Gen Z is going to be even more liberal than millennials. Like it's a never ending asymptotic progression towards extreme progressivism.

But what do you think about that? Well, yeah, I worry about that. I ask partially why I'm like trying to get the message out there to like, kids my aid because it's not really anybody else my age articulating like the Gen Z's perspective. But even in California, from what I've seen of some kids, is that they have all this liberal propaganda, like directed towards them all the time, that they actually start rejecting it, that they don't like it,

and they start becoming more conservative because of how much it's pushed onto them. So you do see that. It's like the kids of cops are fucking out of control. Do you think it's mostly just kids not wanting to be told what to say? Um, I think they was a lot of, they see like SJWs and that sort of thing and that sort of because I know from the left. Like Gen Z is definitely like they have to deal with the SJWs the most and they're the ones who are like coming into the internet and being like, don't tell us we

can't say all this shit that's been that was what we were reading on the internet all being like, don't tell us we can't say all this shit. That's been, that was what we were reading on the internet all growing up, you know? Yeah. Yeah. So like it, it feels like they're, they're old enough to feel like something's being taken away from them because they grew up on the internet, you know? That's true. Um, I don't, do you think anything could, could, um, could fix the school system? You're right in the middle of it.

I don't want to ask a teacher because they talk enough like all the all the Appreciate a teacher shit drives me insane. I don't know if you see it But in LA we get it all the time because our union is so big and every every half a percent They can squeeze out of the local government is like millions of dollars for the union. Well the teachers the teachers union and the nurses union are two of the, two of the heaviest hitters in this state as far as who gets put in power. Yeah. I don't know.

Anything you think could fix it. Well, I'm pretty anti-government. I don't know if that's just a phase or whatever, but it seems like the right thing. Well, it's a phase that'll last the rest of your life. Life is a phase that will last the rest of your life. Yeah, life is a phase. So I would like to think that privatizing more stuff would be beneficial just so you could have a range of things, schools to attend and have more selective so that you could filter the kids out into how intelligent they are off the bat.

Yeah, that'd be nice. All right, anything make you a rage? I don't know, I try to get any questions. No, no, I think I've chimed in where I wanted to chime in. I can't believe these things she's saying. I couldn't say them that well. So if anything make you a rage?

Well, our school, yeah. I don't know, I'm trying to think women. Yeah, women, you got a problem with what's wrong with women? You know, it was international women's day. I don't know if you knew that. But all women were encouraged to buy shit that was purple. That was the, that was what I got out of him. That was what I got out of international women's day. Hey, bro,s, go out and buy purple clothes. I like purple.

Yeah. So this one is that a women's thing. How about Captain Marvel? You see that? You see her try to topple the patriarchy? What's your problem with women, self? Well, it's just a lot of like just nowadays, especially with all the social media stuff, it's so a lot of like just nowadays, especially with all the social media stuff,

it's so apparent like the vanity and like, what's the word? I think vanity definitely, it's like almost every woman has like, histrronic personality disorder. Yeah, they do. So jarring. I think social media has broken their minds. I think social media has destroyed. It. I think social media has destroyed many women's minds and that they can't, they can't mentally cope with anything more than just their immediate family.

Like when we forced a certain amount of women to take on the emotional burden of the world, we effectively destroyed them. So you've got women cruising around their neighborhoods late at night looking for homeless people's dogs to steal. Like that's, that's how badly we've corrupt, like that's how badly they need a fix to matter is that they've invented like the entire dog rescue industry is for emotionally crippled women in my opinion. So I think that's probably an overwhelming amount of women who are heavily involved in that.

Dog rest, emotional, emotionally crippled. I don't know, so what do you think about that? Yeah, there's probably something. I mean, there's always like women calling dogs like fur babies and all this like creepy shit. What do you think of furries? That, you do, man. What?

You do, you just don't, I just don't look at dogs. What do you think about, bro, don't fucking dog, good? That's the line. It invites from the mouth of the band. Right, you keep your, yeah, you keep your fur baby away from this furry over here. Yeah.

What do you think about what else is there? What other weird shit is there? What do you think the weirdest thing is on the internet that you've seen this, the most degenerate I guess? I don't know. I mean, red it's a pretty bad cesspool. Yeah. I don't know.

I don't know the answer so much weird. Yeah, there's so much weird shit. What about Bernie bros? What do you think about them? Oh my god. Nah, just nah. Nah, just nah. Give him a pass. I would think it would be, I can't even comprehend like the young, like the teenage dating world where a girl's got 800,000 subscribers on YouTube. Yeah, there's just nothing I can relate to. I can't comprehend that. It's just entertaining to listen to, but I have no idea what, I wouldn't know what the

hell I was talking about. If I even tried to comment seriously on what the, what the, what young, fucking, what teenagers are like. I mean, we have huge social media followers. I would imagine that if, if the, what young fucking, what teenagers are like. I mean, who have huge social media followers? I would imagine that if, if anything, there's no army on that. That's 800,000 people. She's like, I know.

Like she could command 800,000 people. And a lot of them are, a lot of them, I'm sure are 30 year old men. Probably. Who will do any, you're like, you're running your own fight club from your YouTube channel. I don't know how to, I don't know how to wrap my mind around that one. It's a good point.

Yeah, you don't. Thank you. All right, so was the women what, does anything else make you a rage? Not that I could think of at the moment or the okay to say so. Oh, anything's okay to say here, right? Did you bring it on? I don't know if that's true. Don't test me. I really appreciate you calling in.

I love your stuff. I'll watch every video. You guys put me on, I throw all the compliments. I'll watch everything you put out twice. I think you're gonna be a huge star. Thank you. Like my low level. How do you stop this?

How do you stop it? He's hard to fucking subscribers and that could easily just keep climbing. Like that's the level. How do you stop this? He's such a dozen. He's a lot of fucking subscribers and that could easily just keep climbing. Like that's the level where YouTube promotes you a lot. Here, I'm going to play a little bit more suicide. Who actually end up sucking the smooth end of Satan's trident have nothing to do with these weepy man cows. Use it as an excuse to be big as a barrel and not get made fun of. Of all things to protest, they couldn't have shipped the bed worse than by contesting a medical consensus that obesity is unhealthy.

You're spinoza paper. Don't cut it. Your size, your body, isn't a book. Don't judge it. Your life isn't a movie. Don't end it. Don't go. You know what I'm supposed to hit?

Yeah. Fist when you put down it. Take yourself with the zoo animal you are and stop getting fed so often. I really did the animal crossing music. I think I heard some death grips in there. It shouldn't shock anyone when they start giving nougies to their classmates. I'm surprised there isn't a shit flinging epidemic yet. The root of the issue is that schools are inherently

incompatible with the nature of teens. And speaking of the nature of teens, this goes out to whoever picked the curriculum for public schools. I'm so bombed. Teens already want to jack off 24-7. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Donny Washington, Bigmouth, and all types that in general should have home. Last thing they need is to learn how to put a condom on a one-d dog and get birth control without their parents knowing. They think sick fucks uses that 13 year olds are having sex anyways, so you might as well teach them

how to do it properly. I hope you realize that people thinking on their part, they want kids to be sexualized. It's not a coincidence that teens are cranking their hog about as often as they brush their teeth. And STDs have been on a steady source since the 60s. Now, the reason why they want kids to be sexualized, I'll let you figure that one out for yourself. I love those things in the dark. Alright, I love it.

I love every part of it. Alright, so thank you for calling in. Thanks for having me. I'll every part of it. All right, so if good. Thank you for calling in Call back anytime anytime. I love it. I love you. I love your stuff. All right. See you. I see you. See you Highly highly entertaining on the drive here. I heard about some fuck shit that happens here in LA What happened? Apparently there are celebrities injecting their faces with the stem cells of Korean baby penis. Four skins. Four skins?

Yeah, that's true. Yeah, well, that's what the fuck is going on here. I think that's, might still be, I think I brought this up on the show. I think that's technically illegal here still, but not in, I don't think it is in most of Europe. I heard that like Sandra Bullock was like going on, like promoting it on the Ellen show,

like talking about how she does this to herself. Oh yeah, Ellen, they injected, injected four skin, baby four skins, right into their faces on TV. What the fuck? On Ellen. How is that okay? Hey, I don't know, man. maybe four skins right into their faces on TV. On Ellen. On Ellen. How is that okay?

Hey, I don't know, man. I don't know. Is this an end to show us your force, your elephant force? We're using it for, in Europe they use it in their collagen, collagen injections. Yeah, it's a weird town.

They'll do anything to stay young. They'll buy anything to stay young. I got some advice. Hey, Dick, skip. There's a new meaning to this term DSL, right? Hey, Dick, skip to the second paragraph. If you don't care about the backstory, oh, of course I do. I got a problem you might be able to help me with.

So a while ago I met this incredible chick. I was walking to a bar with my buddy. It was about to go home. And I had worked, I had worked in four hours. We were at, we were about to part ways. Some chick walked up to my friend. This was someone he met at a festival. Maybe I should skip this. We started chatting and sort of flirting with me. I just talked for a bit and then bailed as I was intending to do. The thing that stood out was that my friend was always a bit of a jackass, he always was. One of those guys that had always had to leave the last word regardless of how stupid it is

and it's a terrible trait. However, this chick shut him down at every turn and he fell silent. She was the first person that I've ever seen do that. This made her more attractive to me. Ha, ha, ha. Just because I know you're asking G cup, they are incredible, larger than my head.

Uncheese-eavable. Somebody tell me to hug you, too. Yeah. So I got her details. Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, et cetera. What a pain in the ass. Can you send me all of your, all of your details on every account you have? Yeah, seriously.

If a girl gives you a Snapchat, you're getting dudes. I went home and as I intended to do, I talked to this chick for a while, flirting, sexting, etc. She lived a decent distance from me. I really wanted to hear more about what did she say? Routine prostitutes. What did so say about women? Well girls her age. Yeah, yeah, preteen prostitutes or teen prostitutes. She lived a decent distance from me. So we talked more than we hung out. Brutal. We started getting more and more serious. We got more and more involved with each other and then suddenly shit got in the way. She went through deaths, been her family, a handful of health

complications and job problems. Eventually our everyday calls and messages became shorter. And then eventually barely none at all. Man this chick have been talking and etc for nearly three years. And although we've expressed how we feel about each other and where we wanted to go with this relationship, it's gone nowhere due to all the shit that she's been through. That's exactly the problem. There's always more and more loss, health problems and work problems. I know it sounds made up, but I have sex. Good question. I know it sounds made up, but I've confirmed it myself in person.

He said, yeah, he said hung out. And I don't mean to sound insensitive if I do. She's just really fucking unlucky and way too caring. I really do like this girl. And this is the first time I've been felt the way I do about someone in this way. So my question is, what should I do? If I back out now, I'm just another problem to a list. Not that I won.

I knew that would set you off. Not that I want to in the first place anyway, if I... But you suggested it. If I stay in weight, all I'm doing is sitting around waiting for a relationship that may never happen. Plus, since this is the first time I've felt this way towards someone, it's just made me more lonely because we see each other so little. We'd love to hear your opinion on this whole thing and if you have any questions, let me know keep killing it dick and go fuck yourself dick and Sean George, whoo, that's a my three years. These are the lives. These are the lives of silent desperation that men leave three years of

sexting and cyber stalking Wait, etc. Whatever that is It's way too long with time you work at least you didn't say way too long. Wait too long. Etc. Whatever that is. It's way too long with time. You work. At least you didn't say way too old. I do want to tell everybody if you have any kind of internet presence at all, Snapchat is how you're going to get laid.

I learned this from... I've never used Snapchat. Mumki Jones was big on Snapchat when he started his channel and he would have it in all of his videos. He just put his Snapchat. So he just took fans and shit. But he met girls that way. Really? That's how he met his girlfriend that we lives with.

Oh, putting mumke on blast. No, no, because I just copied it. Like after he did it, me and everybody else in the Procrastinators podcast, we all got on Snapchat. That's how I met her. All my friends got girlfriends like that. Guys, guys, Virgin Guy is getting laid in shit. I'm putting up a Snapchat. That's how I met her. All my friends got girlfriends like that. Guys, guys, Virgin guys getting laid in shit. I'm putting up a Snapchat, the Dixho Snapchat, the Dixho Snapchat. No

nudes. Put that right in the title. So women know not to do it. I heard that wink. I can't. Wow. I feel like this guy's wasting a lot of time, but she has huge tits. That's important. Yeah, but he hasn't gotten to touch of yet, right? Well, we don't know.

As he or she, I mean, we need like a, doesn't seem like it. Shit, or get off the pot. That's my basic thing. That's something like this did happen to me. The whole thing about adding a problem though, not your responsibility, fault in any way. It's just like, it's problems, non-stop. Yeah, you don't hang in there

because you're afraid to add a problem to her list. If you think that might be part of it, something's going on. Yeah. What did he say here? They don't live anywhere near each other? I think if it's anything like what I dated a girl very, very briefly, also huge tits,

and then immediately, almost immediately after her dead got cancer, people got deported, all kinds of stupid shit. It seemed like the same thing, all kinds of stupid shit was happening to her all the time. I mean, you invested three years into this. Why not commit, make a giant, make a giant stupid commitment and see how it goes. What's preventing them from being in the same place?

Like, can he not, if it's so important, could he move to where she is? I don't know. Let me see. Let me see. One of them doesn't have a car. So as soon as the other one gets a car, then all the problems are, no, I don't know. Yeah, I feel like now if I back out now, I'm just another problem to her list, not that I want to in the first place.

And if I stay in weight, all I'm doing is sitting around waiting for a relationship that may never happen. Need more details. First time I felt like this towards someone, it's made me more lonely because we see, I think everyone's very attached to their life. Yeah. You know?

He's also built up, sorry, go ahead. Yeah, I picked up and just like, when I met her online, through Snapchat, she lived in Rochester, I just picked up and moved there. Yeah, you didn't wait three years. I mean, I have a job I can do from anywhere. So I was just like, she was like, I have to finish school before I can move,

and I was like, fuck it, I'll move to you. Like, I don't know what his situation is if he can't do that. But three years, everyone can move. You're serious enough about it, then go fucking, you just go up there. Go do it. Why not? See how it works.

And then bail, and then bail if it doesn't. We'd love to hear your opinion. Yeah, because if you don't, you will clearly, you will clearly regret it forever. Not doing anything, just letting it die. I'll do it, why not? Just go move. Get those titties.

Hey, dear Dick, how do I deal with my Asperger's sister and her autistic boyfriend who reeks of cheap Mexican cologne? Do Mexicans have cologne? I have no idea. I'm a normal 30 year old boomer with a job and a pension for low calorie energy drinks. My Asperger's sister, whom I know she has Asperger's because she takes all sarcasm literally and also bursts into tears whenever I interrupt her monologues about her Harry Potter fanfiction to ask her how university course on female representation

in zombie movies is going to help her find a job. Let me read that again. Who my know she has Asperger's because she takes all my sarcasm literally, and also bursts into tears whenever I interrupt her monologues about her Harry Potter fanfiction to ask her how her university course on female representation in zombie movies is gonna help her find a job. Yep, she has.

She followed, yeah, you got it. She has recently made things very awkward by bringing her 350 pounds semi-autistic boyfriend to every family gathering. Obviously, she has the freedom to date whoever she wants. False. People do not have that freedom. You have just given her that freedom.

That is not a right. You do not have the freedom to date whomever you want. Little bit of Islam goes a long way. But the problem is, it's all my culture. It's very concentrated. Yeah, just a little tiny bit. Muhammad had some things right, most wrong, but all religions do.

But the problem is this awkward motherfucker is so cringy, his very presence clearly makes everyone else in the room uncomfortable. He looks like a heavier Matt Jarbos speaks in flat mumbling monotone, like Christ the Kiwi, is never seen without a half gallon jug of drinking water because he gets thirsty. But that in quotes. We all get thirsty. Yeah, I get thirsty. I'm thirsty right now. Can I have one of those? Yeah, go ahead. I guess beached whales need to keep themselves hydrated.

I've never seen him talk willingly. Let me see here. Oh, let me get so off the video out of there. I've never seen him talk willingly with another adult beyond basic greeting. Okay, so you, and any given family gathering, he and my sister spend the whole time either talking about Pokemon.

We're ignoring everyone else and looking to each other's eyes. Pokemon are restaurant menus, right? Calling each other my guardian angel. Oh God. Oh, or some hilariously immature names. That's a fact. I don't have any hate for them. I've gotten in trouble with my parents and the rest of my family several times because I can't resist throwing zingers the way for example when this guy revealed to me in one of our One in our one on in our in our one and only long conversation that his career goal Was to be a professional dancer You got to be shitting me Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Maybe a little harsh. But I do not fault the bursting out laughing at all.

After which my sister refused to speak to me for weeks. It doesn't help that he dropped out of community college because delivering pizzas and oh my god, he really hates this guy. The other difficult point is he wears a ton of cologne. Well, he probably, seriously, he probably stinks. I mean, I enjoy spending my, I enjoy spending time. I enjoy spending time with the rest of my family, but my sister and her boyfriend are making it hard. And since they both leech off their parents, despite being in their late tw- Oh, okay. Uh, you are two, you're two into your family. Yeah.

Yep. Yep. You got to, you got to get out. Nobody should care about. No man can care about his family this much. He's really investing himself in it, isn't he? Yeah, all these, just all these types, I haven't typed about my, I've never typed about that much about my family, my whole life. No, it's just, yeah. I just got some comments. How can you be that, how can you be that invested in your own family?

I don't know. There's TV families that are much better than yours. Sure. That are making mistakes. How about that are making mistakes that are crafted? Is he like the one guy who hasn't learned any form of escapism? Yeah, just play video games.

Just games. He gives a fuck who your sister's dating. Yeah, it'll be somebody. Right. They'll be an idiot. Sure, no matter what, it's gonna be that be somebody. Right. They'll be an idiot. Sure. No matter what, it's gonna be that much better. Was she just mad that her sister's boyfriend was fat and a nice...

Stinks like Cologne. It doesn't sound like he's doing anything. Yeah, well, I'm just trying to do it. Try this. Hey, fatso, he's up on the Cologne. Yeah. Just sit at dinner, first thing, say grace, right in that moment of silence, A-Tub-O, why don't you pump the brakes on the cologne a little bit?

Yeah. And the smell's in career. You could smell like a rotting whale. Think about how you smell like a beached whale, rotting in the sun, you fat sack of shit. Just try it. You know, what's it's your family? They can't kick you out.

Just start it with no offense, but. Yeah, that's how you do that. I mean, this is a compliment. You stink like shit. Because your colon stinks and you stink. And they're together. It's creating a third stink. A third stink.

It's a chemically, it's an industrial, industrially created stink. The likes of which has never existed on earth before. You stinky fat sack of shit. Try, just see what happens. You know? Yeah. So the next time he puts on the clone, maybe he gives it a second thought.

Like, ooh, I don't want to be called this fat-stinking sack of shit anymore. Yeah. And he's up. I'm going to pump the brakes on that clone. Yeah, maybe spend more time dancing or I don't know. Or next time he comes over, here's what you do. You get a pump bug sprayer, a roundup, bug sprayer, you know the kinds I'm talking about.

Yeah, yeah, I do. And you fill it with gasoline. Oh God. Five gallons of gasoline and then you pump it full. And next time you see him right when he comes in the door, you say, hey, smelled like you could use a shower stinky and then spray it all over. She's with gasoline, okay.

Yeah, why the gas? That's just, watch it. Watch it, dance on over to the pilot light on the furnace. Because gasoline you buy by the gallon and it's cheap. Shoot a hose at them. Nah, no, it's water. That's like, there's nothing inherently threatening about water.

Baza, not unless it comes out of a fire hose. I think that would help. Yeah. Be careful if it's sister smokes. Go up in flames. Or a fire extinguisher. That's that's good. That would be funny. Yeah. Walk up right behind him and stick it on his asshole and then spray it. Fill him up. Fill him up. And just right out right out you stink in the yard with a fire You stick the tube up his ass and you hold on to the the red part that he'll float you away Yeah, we're taking a blimp right over LA. Do the howey-man Dell joke

We're get him to balance a quarter on his see if he can balance a quarter on his head Put a funnel in his pants, you know put a glass balance it a glass, get him to balance it in his belt between his stomach and his belt, put a quarter on his head and tell him that if he can drop the quarter into the glass, you'll give him 20 bucks. And when he's like that, punch him in his nuts. You know that joke? No. Yeah, that'll, that'll, that joke? No. Yeah, that'll, that'll stand by.

No. You know that joke, Sean? Yeah, I mean, if I had a nickel. Take a bar of soap. This is what you do. Go over, go over to his house, take a bar of soap and write on the bathroom mirror, you stink fatso. So that when he showers, the steam will fill up the room and he will think a ghost thinks that he stinks, that it just appeared like a haunted mystery. I have a friend who smells so bad that when he lived in my house for a

little while and after he moved out, we had to had to pressure rush the room several times just to get his send out of it. Wow. Send can be powerful. Here's what you do. Sticks. You get a, I understand why you're so mad. Here's what you do. You say that you have an app on your phone that can detect stinky fat sacks of shit.

Who's... Sean. Sean. Yeah. And then it's actually, it's just a tone generator that just goes, boo, when you hit the button. You go from person to person. It's called stinker, STINKR, the app. See, I've developed an app called stinker. And it makes a noise if you stink. And then you go to everybody and you go,

you pretend to press it, but you don't really press the tone generating thing, tone generating, just look up tone generating app. Yeah, sure. The thing, ooh, you know, it goes, ooh, like whatever you, and then you go to everybody, oh, nothing, huh?

Dad doesn't stink. Let's try mom, nothing. Mom doesn't stink. Let's try me, of course, to get a baseline. No stink over here right in the middle of dinner. Yeah, because he can't. What is he going to do? Walk away from dinner? That's right. That's right. Yeah. Then you go to your your home. Are you just sitting around behind the table like a super villain? Yeah. Like like De Niro in the Untouchables. Like the bat. Like Kurt Russell and the thing.

Right? I haven't seen the things. Oh, it's weird. It's okay. Yeah, it's good. Yeah. Yeah. And then you get to him and you go, uh-oh, you're the last one here, stinky. Get ready for this.

And then you just hammer the tongue. Wow. And then try to shut it off and it won't shut off. Yeah, I can drive this to the top. You've overloaded the stink sensors. I got to get a new phone. You owe me a phone. You stinky ass motherfucker.

Any of these solute, any of these things I will work. They all involve calling him a stinky ass motherfucker. Or pretend to get mail. Hey, look, all this mail just came. Let's see, this one is for stinky McGee. Who here, does anyone here, was this address to the right place? It says, dinner tonight, stinky McGee at 6 p.m. dinner tonight, my parents house.

Huh. I would just tonight, my parents house. Huh. I would just like, do I stink? Just like do a whole show. Have Amazon sent soap to his house every day. Soap the month club. Yeah, sign them up for a service, like a mystery box of toiletries.

I think they have those. Every day. Yeah, yeah, sign them up for like a service like a mystery box of toiletries. They I think they have those every day. Yeah. Yeah. Every day a six pack of Irish spring and a rope and a how to make a news. Oh, Jesus. printout. Very just, you know, I don't think you can hang yourself clean. You don't have to do that fat, right? What? When it just break the rope depends. If you're that heavy, not if you get a nautical rope. Yeah. Fatter than a ship. Get a nautical rope. I can't do the math.

You saw, I struggled with one math already today. I get one math to show. Oh, Jesus Christ. I'm trying to figure out a way to say, yeah. Yeah, I'm figuring it in. I figure you're working on that. This is gonna shit it. This bit is not done.

Get a shirt, get a shirt, go to fiverr.com and get somebody to make you a shirt that says, I'm with stinky. And then a big picture of him. This is, it's easy to fix. That's my point, it's easy to fix. Make him wear one. You gotta make eight different versions of that shirt

that each have an arrow pointing in a different direction. Get eight people to surround him with all their arrows pointing at him. Yeah, you get eight different versions of that shirt, and then if wherever you end up sitting, you say, okay, hold on, I gotta go change. And then you put on a different shirt with an arrow pointing at him.

Yeah, and then everybody at the table has to spend 15 minutes, musical chairs arranging themselves into the right formation to have all the arrows pointed at this. Yes, like at a sports game, when you hold up, go team, and it's like, ought game or something, we gotta switch it around.

Or just play him this clip. So everybody now, hey everybody, go, it's easy. You wanna check out this podcast that I listened to? Yeah, you got to put this on YouTube. It's called, here's this week's episode, it's called My Sisters Dating a Stink to Puss. You know what you can do? You can do stinks.

Dick, I do, I do, here's my plug for this show. On my Patreon, if you pay me $15, I rant about whatever you want. For its own video. Okay. So you just give me $15 and I'll rent at this guy about how stinky he is and you can just show him my rent. It's cheap, $15, solve all your problems. So I'll go do.

You hire a guy who wears like a dog catching uniform and have him knock on the door during dinner. So hey, you guys, and he says like, hey, I'm from the show animal hoarders? It stinks like there's about 50 dead cats in here Like a stripper except right like hire a male stripper and tell them just come in in your one of your outfits like a UPS man or whatever erotic Erotic sensations the women are into and then look just spend the whole time looking for the stink that's emanating. Okay, is that enough?

Yeah, I answered that guy's question 25 minutes on two tonne dancer is enough. Alright, let's see here. I know I had interesting stuff to talk about today. Oh, but I don't know if I got to it. Does anybody want to? Oh, I would imagine there's you, bro. Right. Does anybody want to call in and say they? I'm sure a lot of people are fighting.

Did you grow? Oh, here's one of the virgins. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Hey, long-dung disco venom. What's going on? Hey, what's up, Dick? Hey, so you almost got lit.

You're one of the virgins in the virgin contest. You almost got laid and then you didn't Yeah, that's right. Let me read. Let me read what Ryan sent me A virgin ass a name Ryan is yeah Ryan braze there. He was the he's in charge of the virgins. Oh, oh, it's the virgin. Oh, gotcha It's a rangler. So the virgin code name long, dong disco venom is the one that went on a date this weekend. He was traveling out of town. Oh, no, sorry, go ahead. Oh, keep going. Yeah, you're right. I was traveling out of town. I

didn't have any date set up. I just met a chick at a bar. Oh, yeah, he was traveling out of town for work, which I told him to hit on any and every woman you find, he'll probably never see them again. That's good advice. Yeah. So, so he met some woman in the lobby of the hotel and asked her on a date. Things went well. No, okay. Go ahead. Well, you tell me what happened. Yeah, so I'll tell you what happened. Okay. I can I think I can already see what happened. Go ahead. You can. Yeah, sure. So I went out with a couple of the other new hires at work, our conversation.

The chick was giving me the look like, like, come over here and talk to me. So I go back to the bar and she's still there. So we start talking and my, our conversation, it went to absolute shit. Like I've been working all day and I'm like, I, so I just try to try to put my moves on and spaghetti just starts coating the floor. What did you say to her? What was the first thing you said to her? That's the hardest line.

That's the hardest thing to say. The first thing. I don't remember. I was glad I was at the bar. I was already like two drinks in. She didn't care though. She said I was cute. And I got her number in her Snapchat.

She looked like... So she was black. She had... Can situation was pretty good. Incredible ass. She had her nails and her lashes and her lip gloss all thought up and stuff. Do you like black chicks?

I'm not, I'm not picky. Okay. It's in the Virgin Contest. He's taking what he could get. Sometimes being picky is what gets you in the Virgin Contest. Oh, that's true. Right. I guess I guess I'm the exception.

I don't know. Okay. So then what happened? She wants to go out for a meal even though I already I have of course a blish Yeah, and I pay I paid an exoie burn them out for a meal for two and like an hour playing ping pong at this place Where like one of the like an adult video games plays Almost it was more like a it was just like a regular bar, but it had like a Dave and I was kind of like the same.

Like a Dave and Buster. I'm actually, I might this week, I might be going to one of those later and I might have, maybe I'll have a story for you then. That's a little more successful. Those are tough, man, because there's so many distracting things around for women. There's a lot of family stuff. Yeah, the ideal setup to talk to them and is in a cell where there's not like in a basement or something where there's nothing to distract their attention.

There's no way to spend money or to trick you when it's spending money. So you're in a hotel bar on a work thing and a woman convinces you to take her on a date with an expensive dinner. Yeah. Well, she said that like we're, let me see, we're gonna, she said that I got like some notes. She said that like we were, we were gonna like, we could have sex. Like we, I go on the, I tell some of my other versions, I'm about to hook up. But, but as soon we'll find out that I, I pay for her meal.

Yeah. And we have prostitute. We have prostitute? Hold on, I'm getting there. Oh, no. No. No. No. Okay, what happened? We take a lift back to my hotel room.

Yeah. Yeah. And so earlier, she told me that she works at a hospital. And that she had to go to work like an hour after I did the following morning. Okay. It'll always be after you do. Yeah. Yeah. Right. So so she says she's she's she if she's going to stay the night at my hotel room, she's got to get her clothes to go to work the next day. the next day. So I'm thinking, well, okay, just, I'll pay. She, she tells me she doesn't have lift in that. I'm, I'm paying for her. Oh, she's okay.

She's going to, she's all right. Let's set some ground rules for the virgins. Don't spend more than $40. We're doing straight top like it's $40. Yeah, but you can't get away with 20. That's one round of drinks and not at all places. How much did you spend in total for this, for this prostitute, shake down experience that you had. Quite a bit more than 40. I'll say that much. Oh, much.

200. Well, okay. So I think the, the, the meal was like, was something like 70. Okay. And then I know just for like a first date, I'm talking tacos. And then it's too much for a hotel.

I don't know. I think about an hour of ping pong was $25 fucking dollars. I couldn't. I saw the ball. I'm like, yeah, that's about right for this fucking city of districts. Could she return the ball? I mean, like it was so weird. It was, it was, it was, who won at Pink Pong? Well, I taught her to like be like,

not fucking retarded with the, with the Pink Pong battle. Okay. Yeah. That was our hour of who was me teaching her how to return the Paul. How to play Pink Pong. All right. Yeah.

I mean, if a woman pretends that she doesn't know how to do something, usually that does mean she wants to fuck you. So it's like, he got fucked like four or five times that night. Yeah. Sounds about right. You know, the good news is I think you're definitely going to get laid because if he's even willing to talk to girls, he's a step ahead of like most internet guys. Yeah, that's the point.

That's true. So that's just like what, what's his name is talking about, the pickup artist guy who called him about how this generation, it's like a whole different level of, like most of people I know, they cannot, I couldn't even bring myself to talk to anybody. I only was able to finally get laid

because I became an internet celebrity. So girls taught to me. I was afraid to ever go to talk to a girl at a bar or anything. So like if you're even on that level, I think you've got pretty good eye. So she said that in order to stay in your hotel room, she had to go get clothes. She had to go get her work clothes because like I said, she was all dulled up to, um, to, um, to, um, to, um, to, um, to, um, probably a lie. Yeah. If women want to fuck, they'll wake up, they'll wake up as early as possible and go home and get their shit and then go to work. Absolutely.

I don't... So, actually, when I first talked to her at the bar, she... So, you know, I like your shoes line that works like fucking magic. I actually, in my last job, a black chick, I was working at a grocery store in there, it, a black chick, I was working at a grocery store and there was this black chick, I used it on her and she was super interested. I was stupid to not like get her number. Yeah. So what happened with this girl?

She took a, you paid for her lift home and then, what, that was it? We texted a little bit. I didn't see her after that, but she texted you after that. She actually complimented my shoes first. Okay. And then I'd, I,

what were your two to receipt for superty? Yeah. And then what happened after the lift though? What happened after the lift? Nothing. I tried texting her a bit and Like the conversation I made with her was a complete wash all the It was really weird like it wasn't the kind of conversation that would happen when when you're trying to

Pick up a chick, right? Right. She like one of the early questions was she asked if I was gay That's a bad sign. Yeah. She said, she also said she didn't like Mexicans. Are you Mexican? No. No. But she was getting cared about the negative effects of illegal immigration on black people. I don't know if she was even capable of forming those words, but she did ask repeatedly if I was, like she asked if I was a cop and she repeatedly depended on Jesus Christ. Oh, sorry. It's a hooker. It's a hooker.

You took a hooker and a center. You took a hooker to a nice dinner and ping pong. So, that's what happened. What moment had you realized that she was a hooker? Because surely you realized before you decided to take her. I realized now. All right. Oh, I realized like the next day when I was having like a nice dinner with my other co-workers.

Have you ever actually really taken a hooker to dinner show? I was a little from now on, take note, if a girl says, ask her, you're a cop. She's a hooker. I only read the note, come on. I was two drinks. I was two drinks in a two. I look from now on take note if a girl says ask are you a cop? I only read the cover I was two drinks. I was two drinks in a two drinks of what? Right Two drinks of cyanide and If a woman is by herself would have take like Eventually, I wish I'd had to drink more and do you could start over? Yeah, of course you can handle or alcohol.

If a woman is by herself at a bar, probably a prostitute, especially a hotel bar. If she asks if you're a cop, probably a probably a redneck prostitute. Yes. We got to put a spending cap on though. It's the Tom Likus rule, 40 bucks. though. It's the time like it's rule 40 box. Yeah, 40 box. Don't spend more than 40 blocks. There you go. I'm gonna say 30. I'll tell you she was worried that she was gonna kicked out. She was gonna get kicked out.

Yeah, and I'm like, you know, what the fuck up to my room now? Let's let's go. Let's get this over with. And I didn't like, I should, I could have asked, like, for that. She said she left. I could have asked for like something like at least a BJ here in the room, but I'm like, fuck, get, go. I was at that point, I was just like, just get out.

Oh, you were angry? No. Well, yeah, when she told me that, oh, I gotta go get my work clothes. If I'm gonna stay the night here, I'm like, fuck it, just go. I, but I should have asked for like something like a, like a BJ at the very least. I mean, you might as well just play. I don't think you've gotten charged for that. I don't think what, I don't think it works like that where you can ask for a BJ at the very least.

I paid for a meal though. So what? No, that's definitely not, that's definitely not the way it works. Right. Where you pay for, you's definitely not the way it works. Right. Where you pay for, you outlay something and then expect something. If she's across to you, you were going to have to pay for the blow job. Hold on, hold on. It's not the way it works where you pay for something and then you get something in return

because you already paid. What are you going to, what are you going to go to the better business bureau and say, I dropped in her on this pitch and she didn't give me a blow job? That's not the way it works. You got to get the BJ up front. Yeah. Because you can only trust yourself. You can't trust them to make good on the transaction.

You can only trust you. You're the bank. You're the banker. You're the monopoly banker. You don't shell out the money first. You don't give out the property until you get the money. You follow what I'm saying?

It doesn't work. It doesn't work where you pay and then you get something in return. That's not the way it works. Because the money's worthless to them. The money's totally worthless to them. It's been spent. The time has been had and there is no check. There is no mater deed to come collect the money at the end.

And for what it's worth, she doesn't have to be a prostitute to run this scheme. I mean, you told yourself a Tinder for hot girls is a place to get free. I know. Here's here's something. Here's something you gotta remember. Women think that because they had a good time, you had a good time. And you most certainly did not have a good time. It's a odds are. It's all right. Better luck next time. Long done, just go.

Yeah, help yourself out a little bit too. I hope you yourself. Yeah, don't, if somebody asks if you're a cop, that's when you, you know, that's the curtain. I was in the moment and I texted her that too, like the next time I like time I didn't know. And like that she was there for business in quotes. And I guess she didn't like that because I did text her later that I wanted to see

her. But she got a free fucking meal. So, yeah. Also, don't say, man, that's it. If you could have heard the conversation, you would have been like, no. So yeah, sex workers don't like being told that they're sex workers, no matter what.

Before I had the, before dawned on me. Like, I was like saying like, like just so much fucking stuff. Because they're not there for business, they're there for something else. Whatever they've done to convince themselves that they're okay with what they're doing. I mean, there is a fucking up there reality.

And that's what that was a fucking weirdness in the conversation that I just tried my hardest to ignore and just try to spit my game, which I don't have. Well, you got rejected by a prostitute, so yeah, I would say. God damn it. God damn it. Hey, it sounds like he has the self-awareness

to take this as a learning experience. Yeah, and you just gotta look at it positively. Spend less money and realize all the virgins realize that every dollar you spend is not coming back to you. You're not investing in pussy. You're just advertising. It's advertising. There's no way to track the ROI.

This is what's so great about the Virgin Contest is that they can all compare notes. Everybody can share their stories and it helps everyone else who's in the contest. Now everyone else listening knows if you find yourself in the situation, if a woman says she's asked you if you're a cop, put a stop on it. You say yes. Yeah, you say yes. I am a cop actually and I'm going to bust you down town.

Because it sucked this cock. Because if she wanted you to reach over here and rough up my suspect. I would think most women who aren't prostitutes would think would want you to be a cop or they think that's cool. Or at least they think it was funny if you then revealed you weren't.

If a woman asks you anything, you say yes. Like in general. If you're not playing it, you're in the middle. Yeah, definitely if you're gay, are you gay? Yeah, totally. Yeah, super, super gay. I'm super gay. This is the only time I've ever been attracted to a woman and I need to prove to myself that I am gay.

Let's see that ass. Let's get upstairs. She's a nice ass. Yeah, always yes. Always yes. You tried to, you told the truth too much. That's where you fucked up. Yeah, that's where like, within like the first couple minutes,

I knew what fucked up. I told her what I was there for. And. Get out, get out of here. Better luck next time. Good luck. All right, good luck. Thanks, Nick.

Oh boy. Oh man, good luck. Thanks, Nick. Yeah. Oh, boy. Oh, man. Rejected by a prostitute. Who? Vot of prostitute. Boy. Yeah. He should call the better business bureau.

You could do that if it was legal. Yeah. File a note or the idiom of a C. File a, she didn't put out. File a complaint. What time is it? Let's play a song. It's very late, isn't it?

Let's play a song and then do some voice mails and do some Facebook news and get out of here. This is everybody report this by Vizzy G. Nope. It's Vizzy in the bird. Nope. Yeah. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope No. Let me tell a couple jokes. No.

Everything gets smarter than snows. Yes. Press your rams on the truck. No. Think the bus will give a fart. No. Feel bad when you home. No.

Enjoy being spying the sand bone. Yes. Dinner. No. Starving. Yes, good sun. Is the tension getting thinner? No.

Would it ever be a winner? No. You were melancholy dope. Nope. Head thick and yellow-kino-lobe. Do you lack some awareness? Nope. Put the word flag on the swear word.

Yup. Did you act in fear? Nope. Pamela from your school interference. Yup. You can cry of tick-pollies. Nope. On the end, side, you're going to die.

Yup. Everybody gets choices. If you use to get money, you're fenced as she said. Everybody report this He's not easy losing, I'm taking the bread Everybody report this Keep you blocked up for Patreon though Everybody report this

He's not easy to be Satan, I already know Gotta write a talk I'm staying in the body Gotta get this job I'm staying in the body Not a little smile I'm staying inake and buddy Have it had a low job That's a sad loss of faking homies Can you say eat a brit? Nope, can you say the president's say? Yup, can you say autistic to a tard? Can you say Kanye is a tard? Yup, can you talk about him on a camp? Fire James Gunn, if he did Yup, where's the trailer? Have you a business part of total look like an ass? Can you whistle low streets? No, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope Fire James Gunn, if he did. Yeah, where's the trailer? Are you listening to this? Have you a business part of Tottenham look like an ass?

Can you whistle low streets? No, white night get girls in the sheets. Get in more poems than you can cope. Brain Kindle Jenna reps cope. A la committee is so be funny. What if they crowdfund Kanta Loney? What if Ralph does it though? Somebody call? Who's your job to a lawsuit?

You see B. Kickle do, no, trying to get you fired And all in hiding, spired, sent too many spicy tweets Fire from the lux at the boss rates, gotta get a boy's job back Where the lynching end can be pushed to my back Is it all over for free, speed job Everybody get choices, usually get money offensive, shit said Everybody report this. He's not he's a loser. I'm taking a brand. Everybody report this. Keep your block up on Patreon though.

Everybody report this. He's not to be Satan. I already know. Gonna write to talk. Staying buddy. Gotta keep this job. This is a good song. I know it's a really good song Kind of like that's making me really mellow. Yeah me too Contact's matter nope retweet voice active. Yep. Can't establish a boy big. Nope, but you're talking about a big kid. Yeah Listen what I said. Nope. Hashtag killer man. Yup. Think you best be trolling. Nope. How about an interview on Rogan?

Yup. Slip up and make a confession. Nope. Deser out temple's question. Yup. Try to trip him with the lights on. Nope. Try to trip him with the lights on.

This guy is better than the first guy. Nope. What first guy? Two different rappers in this song. Can't even be a fan of him. Oh yeah, yeah. That guy's in it. Yup.

Better. Can you verify me? No. What yeah. That guy's in it. Better. Can you verify me? No. What I need is an ID. Can you stop the game? I'm so sorry. That's Hayes and Cruz. Talk about killing cops.

I think. I gotta get in the rap battle with him. But you've been in the rap battle with him. Or something. Yeah, you do. Like, I rap? No. Do you really?

I'm not. Yo, everybody gets lost. You choose to get money. I don't have a diction, rap. I've been meaning to do it over the opening thing for a long time I'm not even gonna take it, they brand Everybody report this Keep you blocked on Patreon, no

Everybody report this These Nazis be Satan, I already know Gotta write the tag You'll stay in buddy Yeah, yeah, yeah Do you remember Asperger? You were staying in buddy Yeah

I did a nasty commision Before that happened I did a rap battle with him and I killed him. He left the internet probably a while ago. He was so upset by that that's probably why he kicked the shit out of his girlfriend. He's silly comics Anthony Cooley and Mela, you're not police, Gavin McDennis, Alex Jones, Jiggle Wall, Rumble, or Sorgan of a cod fox day. Asterios from his actual real life career. That's true. Please keep reporting them online. They're dangerous minds.

Words are violence. I did see somebody tweeting about Rosanne. Another woman saying it was a woman on woman violence. She was saying something. We didn't get to talk about the kick-vik thing. Do you have any familiarity with that? You know, it's one of those things where it's like, I don't want to talk about it too much

because everybody's like, you're, you're, you know, there's, it's all conjecture. Nobody has proof of anything. Personally, I just think if somebody who's been following, you know, anime for a long time, I've been hearing stories about this dude doing shit forever. Like doing what? Just, you know, creeping on people at cons and shit

and like having, I hate baby, I wanna get a piece of that. I don't know. Let me get a piece. I don't know about on that level. But like, people just come out with stories about like, you know know uncomfortable moments they had with him but it's been going on for so long and like other voice actresses have

accused him and shit. But then you got like Monica Rial who is also freaking out on Twitter and being fucking weird. So actresses are the least reliable people on earth though. Yeah. Um, this was this was a funny thing. Personally, I think that he should lose his job because he's a terrible fucking actor and he's annoying the shit. He's a bad actor.

I mean, I hate dubbers. I hate everybody who fucking does English voices for anime, it's fucking garbage. What are you like reading? Yeah. Oh man. Well, I can not understand enough Japanese. I don't need to listen to a fucking dub.

Get real. Well, the, don't, don't, don't, don't, you know, dubbing is the, is the minor leagues. Yeah, no, be'd be on original. There's only a couple actors who are good enough to come out. Like Steve Bloom would be one of them. You can imagine on original shows now because he's that good. But could you even imagine the voice acting in anime does was as good as like Rick and Morty

or venture bros or something? Yeah, no, no, all those actors are working on original shows. Right. So I don't think the voice acting in venture brothers is any good. You don't like it? No, because it's the same guys and the guy has like one voice that he tries to use 70 different times. Well, those are like the monarch should have stuck with it, but every single other one is like, oh, dude, a few of those guys are anime people. But I thought it was one guy doing a shit load of voices on the show. Yeah, no it is. It's mostly hammer one guy.

Yeah, it's a duck hair. Yeah, it's mostly right. It's mostly like Hank and Sarah. Well, Justin and Wily just like, Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael, and Nickless is on that. I'm fine with two. All right. But like, it's environment also a lot.

It's a lot of the like background characters like bird person and like all didn't know that. Yeah, a lot of them are damn harmful. I hate that too then because I said it because of my principles this was this was some of the this is a very funny tweet to me. Nick Rikita has been enabling this guy Vic Lasagna or something. Is his name he got me to I lost all of his lost everything. All of his future. I lost all of his, lost everything. All of his future jobs, a voiceover stuff.

He lost his, he makes most of his money by going to cons. Yeah, he lost the cons constantly. Well, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't because people have been, like this has been a thing that keeps coming back. It's just that this is the time that blew up. That's why I'm like, and it did blow up. That's why I don't wanna be like on his side or anything. So I'm like, this has been coming up for a long time. Like why do you keep getting accused?

What do you mean why do you keep getting accused? Cause he's a handsome man, cause he has stuff to take. That's why, that's why he keeps getting accused. He's got something to take and these, they snarling a heartbeat, see it, and know they can ignite a flash mob with an insinuation that is something happening.

That's why. That's the thing, that's why I don't want to take sides on this because even if I thought he did it, the people who are coming after him are fucking insane. So this is one of them. And they are like, doctoring photos online and shit and getting caught.

And it's like, what are you fucking doing? Like you're hurting, you're argument. This is one of the people that went after him. Nick Riccata launched a GoFundMe to help a guy whose career was destroyed, ostensibly because of me to, as soon as that me too shit hits, you're done. You kicked off of everything forever,

Funimation booted him and said, we don't support that kind of behavior because they's made a statement like that. Now they're now that's defamation. Yeah, now we've got lawsuits. The voice actor world is extremely close knit. Yeah, so. So this is Austin, it's like 20 guys in Austin,

voicing every anime. Jamie Marci is her name. She has been going after Nick for being a blackface lawyer. Like she tried to start that thing again. Blackface lawyer, right? Because Nick dressed up as a friend. As his friend, at his friends party, it was even, it was even dumber than that in his own house when they were roommates.

Nick put on the guys close It doesn't to these people the any reason is completely indefensible. Well, this is where it gets funny So she's saying blackface lawyer blackface lawyer blackface like over and so much so that it's on It's uncomfortable because this bitch is white is the driven snow like what did he find of hers is what I want to know She eventually says here's the the tweet I brought in from her. Let me find it. So she's gets, you know how women, they get up their own ass with how funny they think they are.

You know when that happens? No. Or they're just, they're lolling so hard that they get lost in the loath sauce. They think, they think they're funny and they're not. They're never funny, but they keep having to tell themselves how funny they are. So much that they lose track of the conception of funny and it becomes like the existential ism of the existential crisis of women of women burned of women burning you. She says.

She says about Nick Jamie Marci. It looks like he fell in shit face to me. What's worse, black face lawyer or shit face lawyer? We'll find out on the next episode. This seems a lot more offensive to me. That seems so, I'm gonna make a lot more racist. This seems really racist to me. Then imitating your friend, like, oh, we got it.

You got got, you got got. So putting a private thing and you go, what are you saying? He looks like he fell in shit, huh? Really? Because you've been saying this whole time that it's morally indefensible to put shoe polish on your face

because of black people for some reason. you've been saying it over as a white woman, you've chosen to weaponize a race to the offensive arrays on someone just to get social credit. Like you've chosen to do this over and over and over. You've convinced us that you find this morally reprehensible to do this at all. And now you're saying that they also look like shit? I can't believe this tweet is still up. And that you're not sharing a screen camera right now.

Oh, yeah, sure. Here you go. This is Jamie Marci, who thinks that blackface is identical to shit face. Yeah, there it is. Just just for just in case. Just for posterity. Yeah. This is one of the, where is it?

It's right there. It looks like he fell in shit face to me. And then she spends the next, she's still what's worse? Well, yeah, what would be worse? America, shit, what's worse? Shit face or black? Like none of us thought it was black face, so she spends the net, listen, oh fuck.

Oh, fuck. She spends the next week talking about how people are taking her statement out of context. Oh. And that she's not racist because they don't understand the context in which she was comparing black face. That's a feeling beyond the other side, bitch. Shit face. She had a qu- She had a qu- She couldn't stop it. because they don't understand the context in which she was comparing back to me. On the other side, bitch.

Shit, she had a qu- She had a qu- She couldn't stop it. She thought that was so funny, so funny, she couldn't stop it. I'm so funny, I'm a woman and I'm so funny and it's International Women's Day.

I was trying to find it. I knew people would be, I knew people would be more upset by that tweet and what they wanted it to mean. But I didn't anyway because I didn't mean that. Fucking moron. Then the fact that this man has no problem with his picture in blackface. Oh man, hoisted by your own retard.

I knew it would upset the people harassing me in excusing blackface because of their assumptions about skin color. It's almost as if they don't care and just want to find a fault in me. You think? Well, if you pointed out yourself, people are going to comment on it. Blackface, more like shitface, Jamie Margey. Black civil awareness. Fucking unbelievable. What a colossal bitch. I hope that I hope that Nick gets all those people sued into the sun.

I suspect the mass is suing. Like, Vic, we don't know, but according to Nick, like he's he's conjectured about what who they might be suing and its foundation the cons the cons that made a statement about him being a predator and then every single woman who's insinuating who he was and his friend Todd whatever his name is and anyone making accusations at this point because they're all going to be on

the hook for forty grand whether and even if it gets tossed in the first couple seconds vix got free money to charge every single one of these stupid cunts 40 grand. And I know they don't have it. It's funny for me, because no matter what happens, this is all hilarious to me, because I don't care about the dubbing industry as a huge anime fan, you know. I see. I only watched the Japanese shit all the way.

And I watch it online, like I don't fucking buy the DVDs and shit, because I don't like any of these companies. They're all fucking terrible. It's the fact that they hire dudes like Vic, that is why anime doesn't spread through the West because they hire shitty voice actors. And I'm a retarded. Well, that is like a step over.

And they say over and over the same shit. Come on, man. Diggy. What have you, you tell him you haven't you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you So what are these fucking 10 second like emotes that are like, is a stupidest fucking like the Japanese actors suck ass too. They all suck. It's bad. It's fine that you like it.

It's a fucking entire genre of shit acting. Okay, here's Facebook news? In the Dick show Facebook group, Leia stick heads for their best and worst celebrity encounters, sharing her own story of Dennis Rodman buying her six kamikaze shots. Jack High five Johnny Cash. All his friend was hit up for heroin by the guy who bought Kirk Cobain his shotgun. Oh, one he blew his head off with. And Kate Thompson ripped a pair of powerful and thrilled Johansson's hands at a craft service table because she was taking

too long picking out a hot dog. In the Dixia Facebook group, Sam celebrated International Women's Day by complaining that the pepperoni pizza she ordered also had olives on it. And it's end them, Sam clarified. I couldn't really taste the olives, and I like olives. So it wasn't that bad. Okay. Lastly, the Dixia was nearly avoided in accidental trips to Greenland. When James pushed the limits of his chemical respirator as he sprayed primer in an enclosed office space.

After spending over an hour and a half breathing fumes, James decided to finish the job before making his escape and collapsing on the steps of the office building. His brother arrived in the scene and noted that James' face was drooping like a stroke victims. James estimates that just several more minutes of that office would have killed him. From Facebook news, I'm Tom McCoy saying, be safe, Dick Hetz. Ah, got it. Yeah, I got it. It'd be safe thing. Yeah. I had one from last week that I didn't play.

Do you want to hear it? Facebook news? Yeah, sure. I've got some Twitter news, too, from Reverend Scott. Let's play the last Facebook news. Hi, this is Facebook news in the Dixio Facebook group Eric asked their kids what they would do if they were in Rajere's body for 24 hours. Yeager says, finger blast my crooked curry crack to audio clips of Bles' Jariiatric Korean

voice. Okay. Charlie says, upload pics of my feet. Alexander says he would go enjoy the wonderful sights of the UK. Ha! Over in the Dic show Facebook group, Derek made a thread for Dickheads to list the strangest body parts they find attractive. Standouts include cancels, slightly crooked teeth, clavicles, long thin necks, muffin tops,

and any vulvas. Lastly, John asked Dickheads for help with a math problem. A bakery's ovens can bake 360 loaves of bread a day, making that 131,400 per year. How many loaves will it make over five years? Among strange, unrelated comments about wooden doors and fingernails on concrete, Chris answered no more than 200,000, mostly from natural causes. Other commenters criticized the soundness of the problem.

Oh, pointing out that careless figure is going to put multiple loaves in the oven. The Holocaust, too. Many loaves were made outside the bakery itself. Thank you. This is Facebook news. Oh, I see. The answer is 658,7,000. Yeah, I get it. Have you seen the Holocaust mean with Polly Walnuts? No, oh, they're pretty funny For other people what happened to the deep voice guy He had school took up his time and I don't know if he ever came to captain Jackass. Yeah, yeah

School he got real busy with school personal shit. Remember Dustin. Yeah Here we go. It's weird to think about. Hey, Dick. I've got a rage for you. People who can't tell when you're busy. I work as a dishwasher. Yesterday I go into work.

I find out the person that I'm supposed to be working with I can turn that cos I know something. So I have to work on my own on a Friday, which is quite busy. And so I'm trying to work as fast as I can but people keep coming through, mistaking the fucking plates and shit so I've been mitten up for what they're doing

so I can actually work at a properly decent pace. Then this one person comes in, she sees her and struggles and she thinks, oh, I'll help out. Her idea of helping is asking me stupid fucking questions not telling that she's trying to help So I just say I don't fucking know and so she says oh you've got a very bad attitude today Do your job properly and then I'll do my fucking job a whole lot faster

I've got to clean up off the you You're gonna be fucking angry Love the show. Yeah, good accent. Just don't help. Hey, can I help out? I mean, I don't know, can you? There's a lot of stuff going on here. What are you gonna, I'm washing them.

Just watch for a little bit, observe it, you know? If you feel like you could replicate anything that I'm doing, jump in, otherwise. Yeah, yeah. This isn't really like a learning. This isn't a teaching moment. Yeah, I got too much time to explain. I can't do it.

You're too much time into this to... I can't gauge what you've got going on in your brain. That makes you not know this already. I'm all the rage because Rolbo Rivera is supposed to be a libertarian and he is supporting Alexandra Arquizia Cortez with what she says and As a libertarian

He's not supporting a Dickenar mouth in Hustler magazine, which is what we all work forward to when we watch and look at the Hussler magazine we had Jennifer Edson's mouth filled with a cock we want to see what the fucking dick in the mouth and why Hussler doesn't do that right now that's a fucking rage. He's not libertarian. Fuck him. So did Aos. I think that's pretty obvious. Did Aos do something to make hustler not have porn in it? Or was-

I have no idea what the guy's talking about. Fuck is he talking about? It's all over the place. He's called in again here. I think. You don't me a rage? Yeah, that's him, right? Yeah, this incoherent.

In the title. Pushers that forgot about the LGBTQAA. I want you to wear purple. They keep adding letters. Wait, what was that? That was the LGBTQAA. No, alcohol. So, wait, what was that? That was the LG BTQAAA. No, alcohol.

No, it's TMA. A-A-I are the next couple letters. Like, A sexual or intersex? Yes, intersex, like, A sexual, like, international in a freeway. Yeah, intersex, I think. What level, like, what size? How far do you go? I think it goes further than that, too.

What size of population does a group Have to reach to get included into the acronym Like oh like as if you go online PANsexuals. They're not in there. No, and there's like 700 established like Cross sections of gender and sexuality online like what what do they have to campaign to get into the new column the 700 club more alphabets that's it the 700 club Christ Oh, and then okay, I forgot about my puppy Where's purple all the time by who wears fur all the time purple?

Is that what he said? He said purple. I thought he's his puppy that wears fur all the time. Is he talking to, I don't know what he said. He's like talking to somebody else. I don't know. I don't see what that said. Hold on.

It's a disaster. He got confused at the end. Oh, wait, wait. He got confused at the end. Wait, wait, wait. Where's Purple all the time? Where's Purple? Yeah, hold on. Oh. That's not gonna make it out of this show.

I'm not gonna make it out of this show. What do you say? She said that's not gonna make it out of this show. Oh. Oh. Don't overestimate us. That beat out to like 15 calls I've sent it and never got a code.

But you come on. Yeah, I've called in a comedy show to tell you what makes me a great. We've helped me. We've helped you fight a way to laugh at this. 70,000 fucking people.

70,000 people who were to claim their turn themselves into the border for a final claim. One in 10 people get their asylum claim approved. We'll have to say that in the United States, it just appears a good interior of the other fucking country. There are many thousands of people.

One fucking month, dude. Tell me how accelerationism is in the solution. Tell me how we can stop it. We can't stop it. We can't help it. The country is done. We're fucking done, dude. There's no way to come back from this. Are you kidding me? It's getting worse. It's getting worse.

Yeah. 70,000 people are applying for asylum at the border and 10% of them get some percent of them get in. Yeah. We just got to annex Mexico, right? Let's send all, send the military down there. We could turn it into like America light. I don't know what that would involve. Just like make it like Puerto Rico, like just a yeah, not a not Hawaii. Cause Hawaii's who I is only making dumb decisions as a state. Just leave it as like, I mean, would it benefit us to have Mexico?

Would they want it? Well, it control the world's agave supply. LA is any indication. No, it would not benefit us. But maybe if we just give them the name, it'll relax for a while and stop trying to get in. Okay. Guess what? You guys are now a huge amount of legal Puerto Rican.

Well, I guess it's not illegal, right? In New York. Yeah, he's coast. Like, hey, Mexico, you guys are a territory now. You are now a part of the United States. What do you think about that? Yeah. But you can't call football, you can't call it football anymore,

you have to call it soccer. Like, yeah, we don't want in that bad. We don't want in that bad. Never mind. Okay, never mind. I don't know. You know, they call't want in that bad. Never mind. Okay, never mind. I don't know. You know, they call it soccer in more places than they call it football.

I didn't, I don't want to tell me that. Wow. That it's not stupid to call it soccer. It's like actually called like the so- They're a country, they're a good guy. It's based on population, population or country versus country. I think just country versus, I don't know.

I don't know how much, I don't know what they call it in Brazil where I feel like they're the biggest fans of it. You know what we do? We build a fake America at the very north end of Mexico. We just take all that over and we build like a fake Arizona. We and a fake Texas and stuff and we have like guys we hire guys to go down there and pretend to be Texans, like pretend to be the governor of fake Texas, so then they don't get, like, then they just

think they're there, like, oh, this is America, fuck, this guy with a hat, Mickey Mouse going all around, and stay old, blazing saddles. I do, yes, blazing saddles. Shut up of friends. Fake rock ridge. Fake rock ridge. Remember to put a state. Put a back on what he called a toll road. Yeah. Candy grams. Somebody's got to go back and get a shitload of dimes. Look, our

current solution's not working. Modern solutions. What is the Edgol? Slow these Mexicans down. That's the end goal. Just like like fewer of them will want to come to America if they already What is the Edgol slow these Mexicans down? That's the end goal Just like like fewer of them will want to come to America if they already are technically in America Is that your theory? Well because who would believe them if you said no the one guy was like hey Amigos this is not America. This is a fake America that they set up like blazing saddles I'm gonna go that's crazy. What are you talking about? No, why would they do that? All right.

He's gonna go, well, fuck it, I guess. Yeah. Otherwise, I guess we're creating jobs by sending all these contractors down to build cheaper than a wall. America, Disneyland or whatever. Yes. Well, I was gonna say, there should be a Disneyland, you know?

Just over the border. Yeah. And then instead of, and then if you, if the ones that keep going, we just put a sign in the ground that says invisible wall, be careful. And then people go like, well, fuck, I don't want to run into an invisible wall and look like a giraffe. I've walked into a glass door, drum before. So you're gonna go, glass door, glass wall. That's what everybody laughed.

Don't keep walking. That's way cheaper. There's a sign. Yeah. It's just a sign. And another sign that's like road tax, desert tax, please drop, please put money in until you get a ticket that comes out and no ticket ever comes out. Oh, Sean, this is simple stuff. Simple stuff.

The art Kelly means has made me realize that everybody has got fight for their love lives every day. Bitch, your fight is always fighting content and dark. is always fighting content and does. Sean, his fight is being the Miss Ant rope, hating people, killing Jenner. Her fight is fighting just straight bad to call a beautiful. That's not even challenging fight, too, but I don't know.

I didn't. The materials, his fight is the legal fight to the public sacrifice sacrifice of laughter dead as to fight for their life and tell me he didn't have to fight he didn't have to fight like 30 years he got to watch little girls get away with he goes, take his way out of fighting. And look, all of the sedatives, now I've watched a kid have to fight with his life and he can't take his way out of it.

And it may be real, it may be feel better about my own fight with just existing every day. And so the world could be blind, that it's we all fight. And I believe that you keep fighting. I don't know. Five. Did you say being blind or being black? What did he say there at the end? Hold on, let me play it again. And so the world is being blind. Yeah. Wow. Man. Being blind. It's we Yeah, whoa man. I

think blind. I didn't know it affected your speech. Well, he's speaking Braille. Was that like bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little Kind of everybody's fucking deal, right? Everybody's got a deal. Yep. Yeah, everybody's- I'm with him. Everybody's swimming against a great, and tremendous current, cheering down on them at all times. Yeah.

It's best to keep that in mind when approaching anyone. This is a terrible, feral animal that has been- It's on the waging of war from the day they were born. Hanging on by a very thin threat. Make very certain that what you need from them

is important and worth challenging such a creature. Yeah, you know, like maybe their job is important. Something like that. All right, everybody see you next Tuesday. See ya. Wait, I'm gonna play a song. Okay. Just a little song that I wrote.

I am the greatest, I am the greatest man in the world. I am better than all those stupid little boys and girls. And if you see me coming, you better get out of my way Because my balls are so big, you can't even look on this impossible to change I am the greatest, I am the greatest man in the world I am better than all the stupid little boys and girls I can feel his realization that he's fucking good at as he goes and just getting worse You know what?

It's easier to hear without the guitar Oh no, you got the acupel He's got all the, he's got every take He's got the steps Oh boy I am the greatest, I am the greatestaves. Oh boy. I am the greatest. I am the greatest man in the world.

I am better than all those stupid little boys and girls. And if you see me coming, you better get out of my way. Because my balls are so big Their momentum is impossible to change I am the greatest I am the greatest man in the world I am better than all the stupid little boys and girls Somebody's in rescue him.

All right, everybody.