The Dick Show - Episode 155 - Dick on Five Years in Podcasting

Episode Date: May 20, 2019

A five years in podcasting super spectacular, the whore situation with Road Rage: Vegas, strip club secrets, The Killstream reunion, how the left can meme, Justin Whang, Null from Kiwi Farms, Denzel returns with erotic photography, Doug TenNapel convinces me not to have kids, Larry challenges me to an arm wrestling contest, The Killstream Reunion call in, a Fat Off with lakembra, the Thought Cops, FigBat DiggerNick is a huge nerd, The Time Travel/Abortion Conundrum, Sean is ganged up on, and Apostrophos sends in a glitter bomb; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one. I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one. I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one. I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one.

I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one. I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one. I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one. I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one.

I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one. I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one. I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one. I'm going to be a little bit more about the next one. I'm going to be a little bit more minutes later. Later. I hope that I met you.

Listen, listen, smart ass. Listen, smart ass. You'll like this one. So I get off the freeway, San Fernando, make a right, immediately about 50 yards up the road, just dead stop. And I see up just in the middle of the road, there's a semi truck. I guess attempting to make like a 37 point turn. Oh great. Trying to back into like that super king

or whatever the fuck you got down there. One of the many Mexican supermarkets that we have here. So, and I'm looking and I'm like, I've seen people maneuver trucks in areas like that. It's not that small. You shouldn't miss the driveway that many times. And I'm like, what the fuck?

It's like a 37 point term. I happened to glance when I stopped, I was looking for at the radio, I happened to that many times. And I'm like, what the fuck? It's like a 37 point term. I happened to glance when I stopped. I was looking for, at the radio, I happened to note to you at the time. Eight minutes. Eight fucking minutes, I'm not going anywhere. And I go, I gotta see this mother fucker's face. I get out there because of back then.

It's a woman. Oh, no. Oh, no. I mean, no. I've been drive trot. Yes. I saw a woman drive a woman. I was a woman. Oh, I'm not the judge. No. Did you quit and drive trot? Yes. I saw a woman driving a car. I was, oh, wow.

I was fucking, yeah, okay, of course. Of course. Oh, man. Fuck this abortion thing. We can't let women get control over tractor trailers. That's a good trade. Did you throw anything at her? No, I didn't.

A bunch of semen. Wow. Silenced in the lamp. Jeez. Yeah. Anything at her? No, I didn't. A bunch of semen? Wah! Silenced in the lamp. Jeez. Oh, yeah. Mix. Yeah.

When I did, you like to smell your cut. Yeah. Ah. I myself cannot. Did she look? You were a aviar skin cream. Did she look guilty? That's today.

About it. Did she look like she felt bad? Did she look like she knew she did something wrong at all? No, not really. I mean, kind of still look concerned about where the back end was in relation to the building, but I don't know. Oops, oops, oops, oops. Oops, oops, oops, oops, oops, oops, oops, oops, oops,

it was just, it was, oops, oops, it was like moving like three feet forward, three feet back, three feet. It was like you ever see like the like an old person back out of a grocery store parking lot and there's like 15 feet behind them and they go like four feet back and they're like, eh, you know, and they just have no. They got those curb feelers that are like a tent pole. They're 10 feet long. Oops.

I don't see those anymore. Yeah, those things are, those things need to come back. Yeah, big way. Those were really popular and like big, you know, El Dorado's in shit in the 80s. You're right. Yeah, my grandpa had a Cadillac with him. Of course.

I get anxiety every time worried my wheels are gonna scratch the curb. Yeah. Yeah, they need us to deputize some guys who can just go all right, man out of the car This is the men's driving Truckers association you need to get the fuck out of this vehicle so I can properly make this three point turn It was fucking bullshit. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, you're having a stroke? Uh, uh, burn toes. Throw up. Is that what your stuff is? Like her and throw up. Yeah. What is it? All men toast?

They say burnt toast. Burn toast. I've heard that. Yeah. I don't smell burnt toast. I think I am having a stroke. Okay. Um, well, when in America, it's worse. Max again, six weeks running with me. He's always a LA based comedian, Sean, the audio engineer. Hello, dude. Hey, what's up, buddy? And life coach, my life coach is in studio today for this very special five years of podcasting anniversary. What's up, dick? Hey, five years of podcasting. Keon is also here, Keon the hero.

Hey, man. And the lawyer, the porn lawyer now, with the crazy porn almost dash that he has, how are the women enjoying that must that they really are i was actually talking to a nick rickie about it last night and we just we can't i isn't it yeah that's right it's right it's right it's right just want to get the guys need love it all the girls with the issues go wild i recommend everyone grow mustache uh... five years of podcasting, Sean. Amazing. Oh my God. How how much we've learned and grown as

podcasters in this time? How much we've learned about each other? This is true. How a audio issue somehow. Shut up, coach. Shut your ass up. I blame, I blame whatever OS we're on now. We've learned about each other. We've learned about the other, we've learned about the audience, we've learned about, we've learned not very much about women, but we've learned a lot, we learned about Maddox. Yes. We've learned about the world. We've learned how long you can use the word cuck

before it stops being funny. Yeah. Yeah. Not, it's still five years. It's not nine. Oh God. Thank you all for joining us on this five year journey. There's people who started listening to us in high school.

Now they're in college. There are people, there are people listening to us who started as dead broke and now are millionaires. There are people who have listened to us who have already flushed their lives down the toilet Very few people very what do you mean? How would they have done that? I don't know there's got to be somebody out there I'm playing the odds like think positive Sean cheese. Yeah It's gonna be this time. Go get on some go get on some meds. It's gonna be this kind of show

I think it is I'm so excited here. Oh shoot. No, I have it. I think it is, I'm so excited here. Oh shoot. No, I have it. It's okay. It was so excited. I'm so excited for five years in podcasting. People are gonna be calling in, congratulating me from my incredible run as America's wingman

and one of the all time greatest podcasters providing these beautiful, wonderful, oh my god, who's somebody can you go get that? Okay, wonderful, amazing story arcs, the only podcast that answers the doorbell in the middle of a show. Was the, was you're the first podcast that you did? Was that your first podcast also? Uh, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. No, that was it. Yeah. Five years together. No, that was it. As yeah, five years together. God. Five years with this amazing, wonderful audience. Yeah. It is definitely the most interesting thing that's ever happened to me. And probably ever will. Probably ever will. It's hard to imagine, hard to imagine something more interesting than this

happening. I don't know, everybody. Uh, I'm also, I'm also pumped because this has been a, boys weekend, oh, it's a package, all right. Look at who it's addressed to. Dick Masterson. It's addressed to a postrophos. Cocoa puffs. Oh wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, be careful.

That may be a careful bomb. It may be a powerful bomb. It may be a powerful bomb. Be careful. A litter bomb. A litter bomb. Yeah, it could be. A bunch of open sauce.

I don't know why. Do not open this. Do not open this. What do you mean? Why not? Oh, come on, eat. At least don't point it at me. Hey, a coin. Hey, no, no, no, no, no, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don Is he can you put anything that explodes in the mail? Oh! Oh! Goddamn it.

Geez. Well coach, I apologize. You were right. Coach, turn, turn that. Turns out you were right, coach. Damn it. I loaded a whole lotta. I loaded a glitter roll.

A claustrophos sent a glitter bomb. Oh god, damn, thanks a lot. But wow, was that clear? It was a little bit ex. It was a little bit ex. The guy was still waiting when I got there. I hate a claustrophos. You said you're fucking dick. Look at, you've got, you can't waiting when I got there. I hate a post-refoam. It's such a fucking dick.

Look, you've got, you can't get it off your hands. I know. Do you know? A stripper asked me last night, a stripper asked me if I had glitter, why I had glitter on my face, it's like, well, we don't have good energy. I said, well, I'm up it. Yeah. I showed her a picture.

It's a long story. It's a long story. Um, Road road rage Vegas. Jesus. Road rage Vegas June 22nd. Oh, it's like, okay, cool. It's in. I'll be posting the, I should have tickets posted on Tuesday.

Apostrophos will be there. Really? Mad Cucks will be there. Really? Coach and I had an in-depth discussion of renting a bus in LA to get all the dickheads out there. Oh my God. How many, the logistics of hooring it,

of getting an appropriate number of hoars for this bus? Holy stock. Holy stocked, whore bus. Depends on what package you buy at. Yes, what whore package for going to buy to get down there. At the wonderful planet Hollywood, we're doing this very upscale. Is that what we're doing the show?

Yeah, that's what we're doing the show at the snackstack. I can't fucking wait, it's gonna be fantastic. This is. It's nice and hot too. That's what I'm looking forward to. Oh God, it's gonna be great. Hotness. We're gonna raise the heat.

We're gonna raise the entire town. We're gonna tear up, tear up Fremont Street. We're gonna throw pianos through the windows of minions. It's gonna be fantastic. Everyone's, the Golden Nugget. Fremont's. Everyone's getting arrested. So I'm gonna fuck that giant neon cowboy.

I'm gonna climb up and penetrate it. God, I have not done Vegas in a long time where last time I was there, I was drinking heavily. Yeah. Do free months. Yeah. We don't have things in Vegas. Stays in Vegas, even as far as AA is concerned.

Yeah. Well, I don't, I don't answer AA. Oh, yeah. You answered a God, right? Is that how that was? Or him? Higher power. No, just, just me, just me.

Just me. That's how President George W. Bush did it. Yeah. I respect that. What? Just decided that he wasn't drinking anymore. He never did. Yeah.

That's how he did it. Same with Trump. I read. Same with Trump. Well, I think didn't Trump, didn't, one of his brothers have a real problem with everything. Yeah, and he was like, nope, it's going to, it's going to limit your potential. Okay, but back to the, back to my amazing weekend

that I'm having, 80s girl is gone. This weekend, she said, she said how to be a girlfriend, conference, she said a girlfriend's conference, they all sit around and talk about it. Was that a yoga retreat? Yeah, it's some yoga. It's blow job classes. Well, all right, all right.

You're talking about Michael. Oh, sorry. I'm sorry. She doesn't do blow jobs, I'm sorry. Oh, okay. What are you doing? I'm keep talking about it. Oh, all right.

What do you think that's appropriate? I don't know. I'm gonna get that murder back in here to rush you up. Oh, fuck. Who talks about another guy's girlfriend? He was thinking blow jobs. You would think that his high brow glass would raise his humor level. And I'll leave it down in the gutter like it is.

I apologize. I'm sure as we get a drunk or anything, it's not enough. You're gonna have to suck my. Uh-oh. I for an eye. I get to make one blowjob crack about your wife, Neck. Yeah, see how it doesn't, it doesn't feel so nice now.

No, no, no, no, no, that's why I apologize. All right, I'm sorry too. Okay. Coach is using an IPA glass sent in to me by Thomas McCoy. Oh, so it is like, can you see it on that? Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can see it, I think. It's got, it's got a shape to it that brings out the flavor. Yeah, probably the aroma too. Yeah, the aroma.

Yeah, there you go. All right, 80s girls gone. You smell the hops. Which means, Sean, I haven't slept in my own bed. to. Yeah. That's there you go. All right, 80s girls gone. Smell the hops, which means Sean, I haven't I haven't slept in my own bed like a man. Yeah. In what feels like years. I've sleeping in my own king size bed by myself, like a starfish. I got in and I huddled up. I noticed that I was taking him like, yeah, she's got me. That bitch has me trained to sleep in a dog position. Yeah. In a fetal position. What you doing jumping jacks on the other side making snowman. Yeah, she's making bitch

angels. Pogging the entire, we're going to have a serious talk. It's amazing how big they become. Women in bed. Yeah, yeah, and fat. This is the first episode of the No Man podcast. This is going to be way too much men in this show today. Yeah, I think yeah, it's already happened. It is amazing how big and how heavy they get in bed. Women weigh 10,000 pounds in bed. We're going to have a serious talk.

I'm going to get back. I've always wanted to record a sleeping so I can prove it, but I'm afraid of paranormal activity. Oh, I don't even want to get a little more than you bargain for. That's really the real reason why I don't want to do it. See all those videos online of people like secretly living in your house and stuff. Well, that's not paranormal. That's a potential serial killer. No, and a ghost. Oh, well, I wouldn't want to do it because I like denying that I snore. Oh, yeah. Why? Why do men do that? It's the best. Oh, they're sick. That's gaslighting. That's gaslighting.

That's gaslighting. That's gaslighting. That's gaslighting. I snored last night. I'm like, no, I didn't. I didn't hear anything. I don't know what you think. I probably jumped in. I'm fucking, you're like, you're like, you're snored last night. I'm like, no, I didn't, I didn't hear anything. I don't know what you think you're like. I probably jumped in. I'm fucking hate that. I, the next time a man tries to pull that on me, I'm gonna kick the shit out of him. My dad tried, maybe, are you all secretly having a laugh and doing it just to fuck with us?

My dad, I don't know, I snored. Like, are you fucking kidding me? You wake up with broken glass by your bed you snore so loud You fucking idiot You can barely breathe when you're awake Whole bed to myself pretty nice. I'm I'm I am full on going 50s TV in this house from now on I'm getting Two fucking beds two king size beds.

What do you need space in your bedroom for? Just fill it up with beds. Fill it up with beds. And I'm getting a ping pong net, and I'm stretching it down the middle of the bed. Yeah. Electric fence. You know what we do? We have separate comfortors.

That was a light changer. Yeah, I do that. So you can choose to use it or not? No, no, no. Coach uses his as a light changer. Yeah, I do that. So you can choose to use it or not? No, no, no. Coach uses his as a napkin. Well, so you can have... No! It's a joy league.

So you can, first of all, you can put your leg out of either side, which is nice. Yes. And then you're not tugging out of the whole time. Right. It's completely free. Because somebody grabs it and rolls over. Yeah, exactly. And then the other one's like, give me that fucking thing.

He's like, you push it down and they pull it up. This is, I've noticed this in the love making too. Yeah, always annoys me. I'll, I'll push it off 80 scrolls, so pull it on. I'm like, okay, what are we arm wrestling here? What are we doing here? Yeah, love making. The love making.

Yeah, you better fucking watch it. All right, all right. I'm gonna watch your mouth. You better watch watch it. All right, all right. I'm gonna watch your mouth. You better watch your fucking mouth. Calm down. I think my lawyer is gonna be a road rage vagus. Gary. Ellen.

Yeah. I ran it. I had the pleasure to meet him the other night with the music town. God, I really did the wrong thing representing that guy. No, you know what? It was really funny talking to him because he, he, he, he clued me in on some of the conversations that were happening,

you know, behind the scenes at the farm. Like after the first time we spoke on the phone, he said, he said, yeah, the first time I listened to your show, I thought, we talked on the phone at first and I thought, wow, what a, what a rational, reasonable individual and well-spoken. And you know, not, not, doesn't have any personality disorders or anything like. And then I listed to your show and I said, who the hell is this guy? Yeah.

I said, why don't you, well, why don't you stick around? I have another couple of drinks, Gary. Yeah. And you could meet him for yourself. I'll show you both. It was funny. I'll show you both. It was funny, I guess, Sarah, the lawyer who ended up representing me completely. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Adelman is just the name on the firm. She's great, right? She was fantastic. He said that he left the decision to her ultimately, whether they would take on the case after the call. So I guess thank God that I didn't lay into any of my material on the initial phone call. Well, what I mean, there aren't any broads that work over there, are there?

Yeah, apparently she loved my running joke of how, this is how little I thought of Maddox's lawsuit that I hired a woman to defend. You remember that one? Yes, I do. Yeah, that was, she liked that one a lot. So hopefully he'll be there. I don't know, I don't know if he's actually gonna be there now.

Um, uh, the mad cast and this Justin, the mad cast media subreddit, I don't know if you're ready for this. He has a rape list. Oh, Sean, the official, the official subreddit of mad cast media. Can you believe that in this day and age? This day and age. Oh man.

Oh, I wonder what UCB, they must be approving if he's still involved with that. That's unbelievable. I don't know. I cannot believe it. A rapeless, a rapeless ton, Maddox's own that's maintained, is maintained on his own sub-reset. It's still there. I can't believe it. Still there.

Still there. It's been there for at least a week. No, my gosh. No shame. I can't believe it. Still there. Still there. How long has it been there? It's been there for at least a week. No shame. No shame. I can't believe it. Let's see what else I got here before. Oh, I left out some of the parts of that murder.

So you followed up them on the murder story. I didn't read it. I didn't read it. I just heard what you mentioned in the show last time. I forgot to say that he showed up to court in a trench code. Oh my God. I'm sorry. Like a flasher or a suicide bomber or a school shooter.

Trench code, Mafia. He had a transfer in the group. Yeah, he showed up to court in a trench code. Like a giant. What was the weather like? Not that cold. I mean, it was cold that you accidentally piss in your pants. But it wasn't so cold that you need a trench code.

I was laughing my ass off when you mentioned that, I forgot to tell you. Can you please agree with me that that is a real thing and that I don't have a medical problem that I need to see a doctor for? Because that's just pants from sitting down. But it was sitting down at a funny angle and it was cold. It was.

Everyone has lay-he, you know, pissed driplets, okay? Yeah, yeah, that's understandable. Yeah. But you said a pancake, silver dollar pancake size? It was the most of pissed driplets I had ever had. And it wasn't for pissed driplets. For years. Earlier, it was, yeah.

Good fit in the bathroom and pissed and had some a little extra shoot out. No, I had just gone to the bathroom. Well, you had. You didn't say that. Yes, I did. I don't think you did. I don't remember that. I had just gone to the bathroom. I had just gone to the bathroom. Well, you had. You didn't say that. Yes, I did. I don't think you did. I don't remember that. I had just gone to the bathroom.

I had just gone to the bathroom. I had just gone to the bathroom. I had just gone to the bathroom. You had. I had just gone to the bathroom. I had just gone to the bathroom. I had just gone to the bathroom. I had just gone to the bathroom.

I had just gone to the bathroom. You had. I had just gone to the bathroom. You had. You didn't say that. Yes, I did. I don't think you did. I had just gone to the bathroom.

I had just gone to the bathroom. You had. You didn't say that. Yes, I did. I don't think you did.akis? But didn't you, because I was wearing a professional for court. But why not darker, dark pants? I mean, that's too professional. You said khakis are out. The last time you had pissed dribblets on your khakis, you had to whole rant about it.

Oh, I forgot. Yeah. War khakis, you know, like the same fucking pants. They were real, they were real sexy, Lulu, Len, and khakis. I wanted to show, I wanted to show the style of it,

like Florida and speed and quickness. Pleated and caught peace. And all my black pants are like ones that I bought in high school to go to. Yeah, and they're formal dance is shrunken the dryer. They all shrunk, they got to drink. Okay, they all shrunk at the dry cleaners. Yeah, stupid dry cleaners. Yeah. Stupid dry cleaners.

I gotta figure out this bed situation. Yeah. Cause it was, I'm gonna tie her up, I'm gonna slant the bed or something like that. So when she comes back, we just always roll onto her side. No, like camping on uneven ground. No, like all the blood flows into your head. I think it'll like a street, so like they both ends curve out, curve down.

No, but I want, I need to dress you up. I want to take her spot. I am old reparations of bed. For all of the years, she's been hogging it. Okay. That's what I'm saying. You really will sleep better in separate beds. You have to.

Yeah. I mean, separate houses, separate lives. Oh, yeah. No, no, that's the secret to a good relationship. Yeah, don't be around each other. Yeah. I mean, separate houses, separate lives. Oh, yeah. No, no, no, no. That's the secret to a good relationship. Yeah. Don't be around each other. Right.

I'm looking for property now. And I'm looking, I'm prioritizing places more than one structure. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So you can have like a damn. Exactly. Yeah.

Yeah. Uh, but other than that. There was some artist. I forget who it was that he had two houses next to each other. Exactly. Yeah. But other than that. There was some artist. There was some artist. I forget who it was that he had two houses next to each other. His wife lived in one and he lived in one and there was like a bridge connecting the two. Yeah.

It was smart. Right. Then he changed to the lock. It's traps. Gets mad. Just gets a door man standing on the bridge. Yeah. Yeah.

With my beard. Yeah. I got my bed back. I had a zit on my nose that's, you know, one of those under the skins, it's, they're the worst of the, like your whole, you can't touch your face for a week. I've said it's gone. I've never appreciated, I have a wiggly nose again that I can just touch my own fucking face, not being held hostage.

Smiley came over and fixed it. Oh, it was wonderful. Well, your life was going pretty well. Great, as soon as 80s, I'm sure you're in such a good mood. I am in such a good mood. I fire it up, put on the classical music, get in, pretend I'm at the Bellagio,

picturing Vig, Roadridge Vegas already. Tell the marketer, it calls the moment I'm in the shower and ruins it, turns off the music, but I heard a second of it. I heard a second of it and that was enough. That's all I needed. I don't need the whole song. Just one second of beautiful music,

like Shawshank Redemption to let me know that they're still a god. This beautiful classical music, coming out of a tiny battery-powered Bluetooth speaker in the ceiling, filling for that two seconds of relaxing pleasure and beauty. That's all I needed. That's all I needed. Well, that's the promise that it will work in the future properly. So you already know you won't, I know it won't, why? It's got something else will go wrong.

Two seconds, beauty, do you call from? I don't care. I had the two seconds. I got what I needed. It's pretty brutal how voice calls are basically useless now because all that shit. It's incredible. Tariffs are up. Oh, tariffs, tariffs. Oh man, you went on a round.

I'm having a one man congal line all around the house with those tariffs, Sean. Yeah. You know, it's getting Trump is going to tear off all kinds of crazy shit. Dick tampons. He's going to put tariffs on women's razors. He's going to put little little action figures, all those pop co-funco things. They're all going to be tariff to shit. 10,000 percent tariffs on all that crap. Maybe you haven't heard the literally a lot of percent about tariffs. What's that?

Fuck, fuck, libertarians! Yes. It's just the beginning of the tariffs. They do nothing good. They do nothing good. Well, you're just gonna end up paying more. You're just gonna end up paying more. It's just gonna go straight to you.

You're just gonna end up paying so much It's just gonna go straight to you. You're just gonna end up paying so much more for everything. So fucking okay. Whatever. It's great. Things are looking up. You're very happy. I'm very happy. I treated myself to a nice dual stripper experience. That's why God gave you two hands, Sean. Yeah. Two strippers. Two stri experience. Oh, yeah. That's why God gave you two hands, Sean. Yeah. Two strippers. Two strippers.

It's an evolutionary thing. It is an evolutionary thing. Yeah. Everyone was looking at him sideways. I'm like, fuck him. This guy. The wall's walking around all everywhere with these broads on the farm. They were talking on your shirt on your shirt last night.

No, but I was wearing a shirt that only has one button on it. That was cool. Okay. These are, they're supposed to be more. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Embrace your shirt. Really illegal attire.

Have you seen the, the Snapchat filters that everyone is using? Because they're all gay online and they don't want to admit it. That men are using to swap their genders. Yeah, see that? Is they're all, I've actually seen that. They're talking, yeah, it's frightening. Yeah, it's frightening that so many people are bisexual. Is that what you mean?

And not admitting it that they're all closet bisexual men who are using this Snapchat filter to swap their gender. I have no fucking clue. So, I'm from their male friend. Hey guys, check me out as a woman. How much would you want to stick your dick and me? Get the, what are you doing?

What the fuck? Don't make me imagine that. Is there a Snapchat filter where it's just you sucking a bunch of dicks? Is that next? For these guys. I wanna Snapchat filter that makes everyone look like Edward James Olmos.

You know what I was saying? Steve Wieshemi. It's turning the frogs gay, Sean. The Snapchat filter of a world where men can be women at any moment and women all have sexy beards on them, posting this all the time, trying to farm compliments from their same sex friends. Mumpki was doing it. Justin Wang was doing it,

he's gonna be calling in earlier, just stop it. Stop it, just go, just go suck a cock already. Get it out of your system. Yeah, it's unnerving. Look, they're very strange. Now I got a picture of forever. You pick, you see a woman, you gotta imagine banging her. So now I'm imagining all my friends

and they're still ranking them. They're still kind of the stubble. They try to like smooth the stubble, but it's, you can still tell those that there's a beard gross. It's weird. I have Justin Wang's female version in my brain that I can't get out of my brain that just pops in now.

I'm so glad I've never seen those. If I'm having an angry beat off, it bam. Justin Wings, girl self pops in there, and I think, well thanks a fucking lot, Justin. Thanks a lot, Mumpke. Now I'm picturing your woman asses. You fucking jerks. Just go get it out of your system.

You don't need to make yourself look like a woman and then ask all of your friends to imagine banging you. Just go, just go, just go suck a dick already. All right, it's enough. Don't make it my problem. Shripping over themselves. It's a salt. Shripping over themselves

because we're so repressed. That's a salt. So salt. Oh man, salt to my senses. That's a salt. So a salt. Oh, man, salt to my senses. It's a paradise out there for Tanner. All these men with their repressed gayness, tripping over each other to get it out of, to find excusable ways to get it out of their system.

You, it's a paradise for Tanner because there's so many closeted gay men. closeted gay men. closeted gay men. Cause he likes them every single man is a closeted gay man. That's what I've learned from this Snapchat experience. Every single man is a closeted gay man. All right, coach is looking at the crocodile jerky. Can we break this open?

No, I'll break it open later. Oh fuck. I've been asking every week for like a month. Fuck, I'm sorry. That came in a care package that a couple people sent, Dick, sort of that booze, sort of another bottle of booze. Yeah. So all kinds of stuff in there.

Those hands out of the room. Hey, how about abortions? What, how about those abortions? How about those abortions? How about those abortions? I'm not talking about abortions. I can't. I got an abortion last week and boy, are my arms tired?

Yeah. Yeah That George told I just flew in from whatever and boy are my wings tired. Yeah He said he just flew in and boy are my wings tired That makes no sense like this tan and from you know Would you make like a tree and get out of here? It's leaf. Like like a tree and leave. It's like a damn fool when you say it wrong. I just flew in and we used a legit fuel to get here.

It was crazy. It was fairly inefficient. Yeah. All right. You don't want to talk about abortions? Oh, that's a good show. Why, what do you want to talk about abortions? Oh, that's a good show. Why would you want to talk about abortions? I like that it'll never go away.

Never. There will never, we will never not be fighting about this. Yeah, of course. For the entire rest of as technology grows, it will be an even bigger problem. Yeah, no, no, can you? There'll be nanobots that just, yeah. Going up and there.

Give me pregnant, make me un-pregnant. Let's have it in an artificial Even if we have a time machine we go back in time. Yeah, well, that's all right. What is that then pre pre cod Something pre pre pre-bores your future telling Device report Need nanobots that ride sperm like cowboys. And like get them away from the, it's like, no, we're out here. That's the only thing they can support.

The only thing that'll stop it is men having some control of their reproduction. Damn it. Little cowboys to ride your sperms all around. I don't know. Like a slim pickens right in the bottom. Some pickens, that's what I'm talking about. Wait, I got a question. I just really saw.

I'm glad. What percentage of abortion doctors are male versus female? I don't know. Because I always see to this meme about, oh, 25 white guys, may old white guys may fucking abortion illegal somewhere. Oh, yeah. Aren't dudes giving all the abortions? I mean, I have no idea. I'm pretty sure I realize that. I'm pretty sure 100% of women are deciding to do it. So, what can abortion? Yeah.

Jesus. Yeah. There's gotta be something funny in that. It's never going away. No. Never going away. And it's all about new smokers. New smoke.

What? New smoke. Like, nobody's ever switched sides. They're just louder and louder and dumber and dumber to recruit people who haven't made up kids, who haven't made up their mind yet. Like, smokers, yeah. Yeah, cigarette companies can't convert people

from one brand to another because they're brand loyalties insane. So all cigarette ads are designed to get new smokers. It's a different to your brand. Abortion is the same way. No, it's all of it is as loud as possible and is insane, like a kaleidoscope of insanity to get brand new smokers onto your side. The fair, whatever meme sticks and for everybody who says the left can't meme, just go look,

go look at their, go look at some of their biggest memes, a clump of cells, that's a hell of a meme. Yeah, gun control hate speech. That's a hell of a meme. Gun safety, that's a hell of a meme. They can bust up with the meme. Oh yeah, they're not, that clown emoji is hilarious. Hong, Hong, Hong. Yeah, that is.

Own the lives, good job. They can't meme. Yeah, they can. They accept their memes actually fucking work Their memes are become the law You fucking back patting self sucking idiots Let's get meme self sucking Although memes memes help Trump when we got Trump. Yeah, it's memes. How about this one?

The SATs are now having an adversity score. Did you hear what I think it is? Yeah, I wanna talk about it. It's handy, capped based on socio-economic shan, don't you dare say race, it's socio-economics. No, I know you were gonna say race. You would dog whistle to the alt ride all the time. What's right?

Leave me like running? Like that kind of race? Yeah. I want to talk about this a lot. It's time. They tie your 50. Nope. No, so what do they do?

No, no, here's the thing. So they calculate your SES, whatever. And they give it to the college. Oh, I'm sure you know what economics. So you don't even get to see it, they give it to the college. Yeah. So that they can use this. Yeah, go ahead. SAT scores are marked with, oh yeah, the college board revealed it will calculate an adversity

score for every student taking the SAT, according to the Wall Street Journal. It's an attempt to address evidence that children of wealthy college age parents score higher on the SAT than less privileged students, at least in theory, let me see here. The adversity score will be a number from one to a hundred of adversity. Calculated from 15 factors, such as neighborhood crime rates and poverty levels. A score of 50 will be the average.

Oh, wow, really. Scores above 50 reflect increasing levels of hardship. So it's your victim points. And then, yeah. Right. And then do they, so then they factor that into the SATs. No, they just put it on there. And put it on there,

so it's on secret so that, remember my plan of just say, you're African-American on every college essay. Right. Yeah. You can't do that now, because they'll put a secret number that reflects your socioeconomics that includes your, that travels on this. So this guy got an 1100, but read Harrison Bergeron and think it was a good idea.

Were they reading it and be like, oh yeah, that's how I want to see fucking everything happen. Yeah. Okay. So when you show up to take your test, if you don't look like pigpen, like if you don't dress up like Oliver Twist to take your SAT test, okay, you're going to get, it's going to be a hard time for you in the future. If you get like a privilege, if you get a zero victim points. Oh, hey, Jimmy, look at this. How come your home addresses a PO box? We didn't know

where you actually live. Yeah. I live in the PO box. I live at the UPS store. I live in a PO box in Compton. I drive 300 miles to school every day in Irvine. Yeah, that's, that's here. You get here. Are you cis? Then you have a 50. That's the world's fifth. That's what's happening in the world.

Same guy who pushed Common Core is doing this to the SATs. Just keeping you aware of that things. Thank you. Let's see. Home schooling, everybody. Yeah. Yeah. I'm trying to work that one slowly. I'm trying to boil that frog slowly.

I got five years. Are you going to do it? Are you going to homeschool your kid? There's pluses of minuses. My wife is really against it. Your wife is why? Because you have to do a lot of work. Well, yeah. and the social aspects,

you know, I guess you gotta, cause all homeschool kids are kind of weird, right? Well, plus, I mean, I have to explain the wealth of nations to the kid at like 12 years old and she doesn't understand. I think that supplementing the education is probably the best thing to do. You know, as long as you don't go to a fucking

shithole school where it's like, I watched a little Irishman do homework and it made me, it made me such a bold sherry. Yeah. It's like my mom was saying the same thing actually about like homework that kids have today. It's insane. Yeah. Something has got to be done on. No one is, something has got to be done to lower the amount of homework kids have and the ages. Like, homework was invented as a punishment. That's how it started. I'm sure.

And it's never changed, it just caught on. As some shit to make kids do, under the guise of that it's somehow making them learn more to punish everybody with just menial work of shit that they're never gonna need to know that the iPhone teaches them anyway. I would just pay someone to just do the kids homework. Oh, it's brutal.

And just tell my kid to like, hey, this is dumb. This is how you get around the system. The system's dumb. Don't do this. Do you know how to break good, good, here. And you can, you sit there and you have to just let them do it. When they obviously want to go have fun or something like that, like whittling away,

those tiny amounts of joy in their life, it's insane. I'm always saying it's insane, the amount they have. That's stupid. Just let them not do it. I mean, if they fail kindergarten, if they fail anything until high school, you're the fuck cares, right? And then, okay, now you're in high school

and now you actually have to get through it. That's a ballsy move. Yeah, don't think he's talking about. I wouldn't recommend it to my niece, but you know, you people. Yeah, they're, they're all turn to schools though. I've read a lot about those like Montessori. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, if you have 20 GZU. No shit. Well, yeah. No, that's well. That's how you get taxed. You get your property tax taken away and you have to pay additionally to get a good education. Those tax money.

So add a third on it. Add a 50% on it. Yeah, you should be able to duck that. Why the fuck can't you deduct your school? Because then it's competing against the fucking public schools. Yeah, these are all the pro-borshan arguments that we're making. Yeah.

Oh. Ha ha ha. Rapid incest, that's a good meme. Oh boy. Oh, Rapid incest, that's a good meme. You heard that one? Oh, we're here. Oh, raping incest. Okay. How many of those?

Yeah, how many of the, how many of them are raping incest? Let me get you. So why don't they just say, okay, yeah, sure, whatever, raping incest, allow it. Well, because then everything's rape. You know how easy it is to suddenly have a rape baby? It doesn't, because, no, it's because a significant amount of people want you to pay for your mistakes. They want everybody, and it's not everyone, but there is a lot of people who just have this

hard on about making people pay for their mistakes. Yeah, true. Yeah. Way too many people are just arguing on behalf of that who are not willing to write a check for anybody to help out to actually support their beliefs who are not willing to write a check for anybody to help out to actually support their beliefs, who are not willing to save the lives of all of the billions of people shitting in the street and drinking water that they found in a puddle on the ground that are drinking water that has more diphtheria in it than water.

It's all of those people that just want you to play by the same rules they had. Look at the people who look at somebody else having a good time and saying, ah, that should be illegal. Fuck you. Take alcohol away. Yeah, take it away. I can't handle it.

Take it away. Take it away from everybody. Take it away from Harvey Weinstein. He's not allowed to do all this. Yeah. He's abusing his position in power. He's taking advantage of women. Fuck that guy.

I can't do that. I can't do that. How come he gets to do that? How come he gets to do that? He got to go. That's illegal. Yeah. And also his lawyers.

Get rid of those guys. Kick him out of Harvard. Right. You heard about that? You heard about that. Maybe so mad to hear. But just hold the fuck out of the later. Goddamn.

Rage, I want more. Oh, wait. Hey, can I do a rage? Go ahead. I just realized this is the best fucking rage you may have talked about before. Okay. Uh, burritos with the contents, not equally distributed. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, you get nothing but fucking guacamole in the meat. Is down at the bottom or vice versa. It's a rice burrito for the first half and a meat burrito. What? It's half the second half. Terrible. I never realized how much rage that make,

but I'm eating it at the same time. So I've got these conflicting emotions. I'm like, it's good. Well, the rice makes you angry. Yeah. And then you're in there poking, trying to do carbon dating on your burrito to see where the meat is.

So I'm in three layers. Two weeks ago, I've been eating burritos like every other day now, since I figured this out. I open it up. It's a mix it up. I mix it up. And rewrap it. I'm telling you, it has changed your life.

It's like fucking life. I do it the next time you get a burrito and I promise you, I'm like saving this fucking burrito, I'm like, oh, making love to the burrito. Equally distributed. Three days. Seriously. Oh. I'm telling you. Beer me, Wells.

Beer me. I'll tell you what else makes me rage. Like a oof, but not a good look. Not a good look. You mean just like an expression. Oof, big oof. Yikes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This is the, these are the responses. These are the response. These are, this is the vocabulary of the mentally and firm that we have today. This is the argument. Oof, not a good look. This ain't it, chief. I like that one.

You like that one. I think that's funny. That's because it's not. Is that funny to you? You like that one? Oh, that ain't it, chief. She goes as, you're ironically now, right? The, you mean, like, sarcastic. Oh, that ain't it. She got this use ironically now, right? The, you mean, I just asked. Yeah, exactly. I love chief. I love the word chief.

This, that ain't it chief. I like the. I like making fun of it. I like making fun of it. Okay. I like it. It's just funny to me. I like saying chief and I don't say it a lot. It's like a East Coast thing. The level of smug condescending sarcasm that has be fouled our language and society is drives me closer to the brink of madness every day. Every one day I'm gonna see an oof and just black out and wake up in prison. They're okay, they're chief.

I like they're chief. Okay, they're chief. I like. Ooh, that's a yikes. Oh, black chief. I like they're chief. Okay, they're chief. I like this. Ooh, that's a yikes. Oh, blackout. I like saying it for those of you. They're six YouTubers that day that are way worse. So you're like, you know, like the Holocaust,

like, oh, that ain't it, chief. Dig-yikes. Dig-yikes. Big yikes. Big yikes. Big yikes. You're right. So you use it, I run like funny, like, to downplay something.

Oof. What's your point? What is the point? Oof, what is Oof about it? What do you not agree? Oof, that's a big yikes for me. That's a big chief for me. That's a big chief for me. What is the football dog? What is the fucking point that you're trying to make for God's sakes try? Try to make a point. Just try to cobble together. Right. Enough of the language, enough of your language to make for God's sake try try make a point just try to cobble together

right enough of a language enough of your language to make a fucking point we will help you out the computer will just press tab right until it completes your thought for you you you stupid idiot what that's a brilliant fucking idea Google's already doing that with your email is basically writing your emails for you it that's really good at it's you're like I and it's like love you it's like writing your emails for you. That's really good at it. You're like, I, and it's like, love you. It's like, oh, yeah, that's better than what I was going to say. Sure. Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap.

So there's like, period, sorry. Hold on, let me get, let me throw a sorry in there. Let me get just Mr. Smith. Let me get Justin Wang on. I love you. Yeah. Let me get Justin Wang on to say hello. Woohoo.

Hey, Justin, how you doing? Hey, what's going on, you're, yeah, you're, you're coming and find big oof from me. Big oof, yeah, big oof. What's that? No, you're, you're transgender fucking photo. You know what? You know why I'm actually pissed about that because mine looked like a fat mess. I'm hell? I'm like, for some reason the girl filter on me like added like 20 years onto me. Like I look like a old fucking old hag. No, no, well, then I must be into that because I've been picturing it while I've been jerking off on accident. On accident?

That is illegal. That's a salt, that's brain assault. How do you make that illegal? We need to come up with a law of confidence. I'm like a friend or any of you know it. Yeah, fuck you for posting that. I wish that was a joke You want to fucking know something on the other day I opened up I was saying this was gonna happen and then I Open up in there and the first thing I fucking see is some dude who like everybody who used that filter, they everybody looks the same more or less. You can tell us that right when you see it.

So the first thing I see is some dude who has that filter on and the fucking cash app in the fucking bio. So he's got, he gender swapped himself and then put a link to pay a money with the cash app for his Tinder bio. That's what the guy, that's what he's saying. Because he's a woman. No, because he's just like regular non-snapchat filter women do that. So I guess coach and I are still like, these two boomers in the studio are still confused,

Justin. Can you explain it to them again? So he used the girl filter on his Snapchat thing. So like it, oh, not a Snapchat thing, it's Tinder thing. So he comes up by a thing and he's posing as a woman basically. Yeah. And then you'll have these women who have like their cash out. So he's like, give me money because this is funny.

Yeah. No, he's just like, give me money. this is funny. No, no, no, he's just like, give me money. I'm a woman. That's what I said. Yeah. Now, the coach didn't say that they're still going to understand. They're right. There are huge squads of women on Tinder who their entire bio is just, hey, uh, Venmo, me or cash at me. This much money. Because they're actual prostitutes and we're okay with that for some reason, but they don't have sex. They don't, but they're in LA, at least there's a whole bunch of things closing.

It's kind of like how like taxes work, but it's like if, it doesn't have as a prostitution, if it's donation. Sure, yeah, a desperate in-sale tax. Good job. Does that work? No. That donation, yeah, Keon, that doesn't work.

But I'm just donating for her time. Right, but you are just donating for her time. Right. Yeah. But you are, you are just donating more than makes is by consent between consenting adults once we actually hang out. So now you're talking about two different, two different things. The tax consequences and the actual prostitution consequences are two different, but for tax purposes, the donation part only works if she'll still fuck you, even if you don't donate. Well, of course she would. Well, yeah. Okay. Good point. There you go. Yeah. All right. I don't donate. Well, of course she would. Well, yeah, okay, good point. There you go. I don't think my wife would keep fucking me if we weren't married.

Yeah, isn't that, isn't that, isn't that, ain't it, you go? Should in his wife be thrown in jail for that? Yeah, it should. I agree. You're right. Mrs. Coach, you're on notice. My client is going to be serving you things. All wives, that's Trump, that's Trump 2020.

He's going to come out and say, all wives are guilty. And I'm going to arrest all of them. If you call this number, we'll send out a squad and your wife will be arrested and thrown in jail for it. It's just a whatever reason. We'll find one. I'm playing 20, 20, 20, three, four. And David D's drawings.

Who's David D's? Oh my God. You have to look up. He used to be a Sesame Street. He was an artist of some sort for Sesame Street. And now he draws these super vivid things of like babies getting vaccinated by crazy doctors. And it's any other drawings like a different conspiracy thing. And I just picture Trump, a March go women off.

Oh, yeah. For the marriage thing now in that art style. You pull it up. I think so. Yeah. David D's, he's got, he had like Trump with lizard people. Yeah. He's tough.

Why is the. Here it is. Whoa, look at that dude. He did, we went after the. Wow. That's cool. Yeah, go back, go back show the Pope. It's a really nice art style.

You can tell this guy is completely out of his fucking mind, but I guess that's what makes good art. Yeah, that's cool. Well anyway, man, thanks for calling in for the five-year thanks for having me. anniversary what makes you a rage? And please tell me about Abraham Lincoln inventing pancakes. I tried to think of a rage, but okay. Abraham Lincoln inventing pancakes. I'm trying to talk. I didn't think of a rage.

But Abraham Lincoln inventing pancakes. Actually, you know what? Since I put that video, basically, if you start putting in, if you start typing in did, it's a Google ad is. Yeah. Did Abraham Lincoln actually announce

the back down to AB? But if you start typing in did AB and to Googleogl, it will predict that you're gonna ask, did Abraham Lincoln invent pancakes? Yeah. And you put it in, and it doesn't tell you anything about him inventing pancakes. It's like, oh, he invented this thing that makes boats that get stuck in the water

not be stuck anymore. Yeah. Absolutely nothing to fuck with pancakes. People just think he did. No, not be stuck anymore. Yeah, absolutely nothing to fuck a deal with pancakes. People just think he did. No, not, I couldn't get to the bottom. It must be an Easter egg from. I must, a Google Easter egg. Oh, Google Easter egg.

It reminds me of, you remember last week when I was talking, or two weeks ago, and I was talking about how women have a discrete gap in their knowledge over things that you will astound you. Yeah. And surprise you. Yeah. They've, somebody made a thread on Reddit about that, like about times they've come across this.

Yeah, I got it. From this show. Yes. Yeah. I was going to say that's a hell of a coincidence. Yeah. Another thing I've run, here's, here I'm going to read some of them, is they're hilarious. Women who thought that all liquids had water in it.

Yeah. For example, she knew that milk had water in it, which is why it's a liquid, but then she assumed gasoline also had water in it since it's a liquid. And that all liquid substances. So it looks like there's like milk cubes and gasoline cubes that are just the frozen version

of it that she's imagining. Yeah, and mercury. It's from the East Milk though, I guess. Lava, I guess, she was 28. I get that. There's been, oh, she Lava, I guess. She was 28. I get that. There's been, oh, sure. I thought that at one point. Yeah, when I was seven.

Yeah. There's been a bunch of times I've been on a date and some shit and I'll ask what a girl's favorite animal is. I'll say iguana and she'll give me a look like I'm a knuckle dragging retard and hit me with lizards aren't animals. They're reptiles. Ah!

Really? That's a good one. I dated a gender block chewer. I dated a gender block tour. I dated a girl who didn't understand time zones. Every few months she would hear about a live stream where online maintenance and I would have to explain it to her again. This was a girl in her 20s who graduated university. This sounds like a wonderful existence to not know about this stuff.

I know. I wish I didn't know this. I know. I have to know it. What's shocking is how it goes through life. Like when you're like a little kid and every new piece of knowledge, it's like you just, you feel good.

Can I learn something new? Like that's what it's like to be like that kind of person as an adult. But what's nuts is that they can function. I knew a girl who graduated from the University of Chicago. She had a master's degree from the University of Chicago, did not know that the sun always rose from the heat.

I had to explain that to her and then I decided to talk with her. Yeah, except on the summer solstice when it rises out of the way for some reason. Oh, yeah. Why is that? And it's all well, you hold your an idiot. That's why it does count three set three. Three call you nine said the dinosaurs win extinct because the sun exploded. That's how she thought that happened.

Adult, adult Sean. Yeah. I could see that. I could see that. My wife didn't know who won the Vietnam War. Sky says for instance. Who did win the Vietnam War? I don't know that.

I don't know that. Who did win the Vietnam War? I guess. The federal reserve won the Vietnam War. Yeah. I, yeah see. That's what my mind is like peeling back the layers of the fucking bullshit. The Federal Reserve won the Vietnam War. Yeah. Yeah, see, that's what my mind is like peeling back the layers of the fucking bullshit, the way we're controlled. I tried to get, I tried to get 80s girls,

she'll hate me for saying this, I tried to get her to give me a timeline of wars. Like when was, what year was the Civil War? Yeah. Oh, dude. Did you just want like rough approximations? I said, what year was the Civil War? She started panicking.

61. Yeah. She started panicking immediately, because you knew, I said, I'll give you 20 years on either side, you just got to guess. That's a lot, because there's overlap there. She said 1900 at first, and I started laughing. And she's like, I said, okay, so in your mind, they had the Civil War with cannons and like swords and a gun with the wind and then 10

Lampers 10 years later, those guys went to World War one with like mustard gas airplanes. Yeah, airplanes and shan He goes, well, I said, oh, wait a minute. You don't know. That means you don't know when war was. Okay. Give me the whole start from Civil War. I'm ruining this. Go ahead, go, please, go. I won't understand anything. You just triggered me, by the way. That was like one of the most embarrassing sit downs I had with my dad when he was explaining the progress of wars. And I was just, I had no, it was like a early high school

or something, I don't remember. I didn't know the progress of them. And he's like, you know when World War II was, right? I'm like, I don't know. Grandpa was in it, right? So I had to be like, 1991, 1861. That fucking reminds me that thing of you just said about who really did win the Vietnam War. I was talking to my buddies, little sister. She just graduated college. And we were talking about World War II politics for some reason. And I said, hey, so Audrey, tell me, who were the axis powers? Germany, Japan, and who else? And she went

France. And I just had to look at her because technically she's right, but she doesn't know why she's right. So it doesn't count. That's fun. So yeah, have some fun. Ask the woman in your life to tell you when these wars took place. I predict silly answers. That's a really good one. I want to follow up on this next week. Yeah.

Ask your buddies too. It's also bad if you have like a ballpark, but you know you're going to hear some outland that you're fucking in. She gets a century right. She's got a century. She's got a century. She's got a right? Well, we all started because she's teaching a course on like boom towns, like she's a teacher. So she's teaching about, she's teaching about boom towns like the gold rush and shit. That is, you should know that it was happening at the same time. Yeah, actually, start off with.

And she was laughing at her kids because they didn't know when 9-11 happened. So they thought it was like hundreds of years ago or so. They were saying, oh yeah, that's like 80 years ago. And I was like, oh, you like laughing at kids, do you? Why don't you tell me when the Civil War happened? Wow. Um, night, uh, it was like the parent version of like your kid bites you and you bite him back you, you like that?

How do you like it? You like it when you eyeball you? Except for just biting the shit at them too. All right, Justin, I gotta get Doug on, but thank you, thank you, thank you. What have you been working on recently? Tell people where to go. I have YouTube, tell us from the internet,

if you look at the channel, the channel should come up. But if not, it's youtube.com slash, Wang, Wang, Wang. All right. You got a band too. Yeah. Oh, yeah. My band is called jinx and on and everything. And it's we are jinxed. Okay. All right, buddy. You nothing makes you rage? Oh, you know what I thought of now going back to what you're saying earlier. Yeah. When makes me a fucking rage, is that fucking phrase gaslighting? No, it dude. Yeah, because it's everywhere and go ahead. Justin, please.

It's one of those words that people have, it means a specific kind of thing. Like, if you don't know where the phrase comes from, it's a movie where it basically, I think it was from something called gaslight or a black basin. Yeah, it's a question in the society. And the bottom. By changing my new details around them. Yeah. So they like, they don't remember,

if like they remember things properly or they're just like, we make a question there. Yeah. And now people have come to turn, use that as like this blanket term for just, you know, someone's lying. Yeah.

As the lying. Just say they're lying. Like very obvious, ladies. Yeah. Now you get extra victim points instead of saying they're lying. They're gaslighting me. I'm being gas lit. I'm a victim. Yeah, we talked about this on the bonus episode. So regarding the pro Jared thing, how he was like how he was telling his wife that he was supporting body positivity by having his female fans send him nude pictures of himself. She says, oh, he gaslit me.

It's like, no, you're not gaslit. You're just a fucking moron. Everybody who's getting gas, none of you are getting gaslit. You're just too stupid to live. Like, you're just so desperate for this to work out the way you want it to. Right. Like, you just don't want to see what's right in front of you, that your house is on fire. The weasel that you've been pretending to be married to

is fucking anything with a pulse. And that, like, the world is not what it is. That's not gaslighting. That's being a delusional idiot. Right. Yeah. It's a blurry line. Oh, yeah.

There's a blurry line. I yeah, it's a blurry line. I will say, I didn't believe in gas lighting until Trump kept tweeting out about how he's building the wall. And I'm like, you motherfucker, you're gas lighting me. What? I feel gasoline by that. I feel gasoline.

You're set, you wall people are such cry babies. Just wait, he's gonna build, the wall is going up. From your lips to Kex ears. All right, all right, Justin, you're out of here. You're out of here, buddy. All right, All right. Just to get out of here. Thanks. Thanks for calling, everybody. Let's see what do the numbers mean? Let me get Doug on. Let me get Doug on here. Where's Doug?

There he is. Hey, oh, Doug, can you hear me? No, I can. Oh, you can. Oh, my God. You've been live the whole time. What a beautiful man. See, how are you, my friend?

They happy birthday. Happy fifth. Thank you. Thank you, friend five years in podcasting Dude, that's huge. Did we learn anything? No In the first 10 seconds Let me see. Yeah, was it a good look? I don't know what it what did we learn Sean? Have you learned anything in five years? May get the visa first before you announce a show.

Yeah. That's what I learned. I know what I learned. What did you learn? After about one month after you started this podcast, remember you called me and you setting up your Patreon. Yeah. And you know, the big mots of ball out there.

Which you know, what big mots of ball. Well, what, you know, how many people are going to, going to be into this show? Oh, yeah. Yeah. And then fucking immediately exploded. So I think I know what, what, I even though I didn't listen to the old show, I think I know what made it good. I think I know who was the talent around that show. Well, that was, that was readily apparent very early on in the other show was like, Oh, one of these guys is made for this. And the other one will never be comfortable with it.

Did you know it's wild? Okay, there we go. Now I got now I got a beautiful dog on. Look at that. There we go. You know, it's crazy. The little Irishman was over my six year old nephew. I called a little Irishman because he's wider than the driven snow,

Doug, and he has bright orange red hair. It's like flames. He had the hunger games. Yeah. Yeah, I'll buy an okay. Yeah. And his first word was Guinness. I'm more, yeah.

He came over, he slept over, he had a sleep over here the other week, and he immediately wanted to do Twitch streaming because I told him about, I showed it to him last time and we Twitch streamed so his little brother could watch him at home and their neighbors could watch him at home. And he immediately wanted to do it.

Sure. He was pressing hard for it. And as soon as he knows, as soon as I told him that the stream was on, he starts in with, okay folks, welcome to the show. Today, we're going to be doing Mario, Mario super deluxe. Okay, folks, this is the part you've been waiting for. We're about to go to Bowser's castle.

Okay, folks, we had a little problem with that one. Sorry. And the potential of another American youth is destroyed. He's already done. He's already done. He's already done. But it's in jail now. Yeah. Show some Earthworm Jim comics in his face.

That'll straighten him up. We're gonna fix him. Doug, you have a new project. You just launched. Yeah, this is cool. I finally got the rights to Earthworm Jim's have been trying to get these for a moment. Yeah, yeah.

And Crab Whirl. It's been 26 years since I created them. Thank you. And the thing is, the story's never been told, like the origin epic of who he is, where he came from, we dotted around it in the cartoon and whatever would fit in the little cartridge comic, the little game insert. So I've been writing on my note cards here. The Earthworm Gym epic. It's a book series and I'm launching the first one on Indigo Go. Really? Five books. Here's the original cover that I just did in Waterfall.

Oh, that's great, man. Wow. Being badass. I'm trying to get it. Man, this thing does not focus. There's the new Peter Poppy launching the piano. It's pretty good here. Oh, that's cool, man. And then, so I, and I'm terrified of writing this thing because of all of you, I know you're a super fan. Yeah, I am. I, I don't want to let anybody down that like after all these years, everyone's going to have this super high expectation and, uh, and what if I let them down?

Here's the new, the queen I did that's in her cave. Oh, wow. She's addressing all the, all the bad guys. Here's the new The Queen I did that's in her cave. She's addressing all the bad guys. That's awesome. Bring me the head of Earthworm, J.A.B. Nice. And here's the cool thing. This is going to give you an art boner. Too late. So my tell us the guy that did the original, you know, the game, all the game packaging, like the cartridge and the cover of everything of all the gaming stuff, you know, of Earthrim Jim holding his gun. Oh, yeah, that art is sick. That cover box is like, will immediately make you pick up the game.

Mike Halsh is his name. Mike Halsh. And I hired him. I'm doing a making of book along with the Earthrim Jim comic that I'm doing. And this is the original piece that he just mailed to me. There's a gem on a rock, it's gonna be a wrap around cover. But he's on a rocket with Cycrow there. But look at how meaty and beautiful that is.

It's great. Yeah, a tongue which real. There's a little evil down here and a little spaceship. So this is the first, you're doing the first of five, of five book series for the origin story of Rathorn Jim. Yep. That's good. And what is it at now?

What's the Indiegogo at now? You launched it last week, right? Oh yeah, we started, no, we started Monday, Monday morning. It's been five days and it's up to $170,000. Wow. That's awesome. Yeah. It's big and I want to, all170,000. Wow. That's awesome. Yeah. It's big and I want to, all the fans I want them in because I just, I can't get this

site. I can't get this thing in front of people, you know, fast enough because they just need to, the fans don't know. Yeah. That's so cool. Like how often do you see something that you loved from a long time ago getting, getting back in the hands of someone who actually cares about it. And you know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah. Like after Star Wars was killed and raped in front of everyone. And by its own creator. By its, like, well, that's the problem because it's like that wasn't the creator. The creator was the team, you know? Yeah.

So after that happened, and after seeing Indiana Jones turn into a geriatric before our eyes and fighting the Soviets for some reason. Yeah, quite. A crystal alien, the aliens with the big, all-blown heads. Over used to be like archeology and now suddenly aliens. But this is rare when a creator gets to go back in and I'd written them off. Like I just assumed he's out of my hands forever.

I remember he's saying that last time. I've been pushing for it. Yeah, pushing for it. I've been in my lap. I have lifelong rights to make as many graphic novels as I want. Beautiful. Oh my God. How did that happen? Yeah, serious.

So I'm just going to do this till I'm almost doing Bigfoot Bill, which I already raised 200 grand on that one. Yeah. This is the Big foot bill book that I did. You were talking about that last time you were on, I think. Right there. But I finally get to tell the origin story. So it's like it's a big sprawling, crazy 160 page epic. Damn.

Doug, when do we get the all female live action version? The words went Jim. Oh yeah. We're going to replace the whole cast. So does that mean that the princess will be a guy, right? Yeah. Is there going to be like a Peter puppy equivalent, like a little girl that's all snarky

and knows how to do everything all the time? Is everything right all the time? Yeah. I hate to be people that don't hate, don't like science. How did you, yeah, excels in STEM and all things STEM? How did you get the rights back? Yeah, I can only talk about some of it right. Oh crimes. Yes, all right All right, that's some legs. I mean we had to negotiate back and forth and I had to give up some stuff

My lawyer Fido said in trade you had to give up stuff like what kind of like my left testicle Yeah, no like some gaming some of the gaming rights and things like that. Okay. I made a trade because I was more interested in comics than the game. Yeah. Is that how it ended up on that like exclusive system that you have to buy the system that has the game on it and people are. That's I am it is putting out a 2000 copy. It's got a cartridge with it's got like cow design on it. And people are going to, that's I am, it is putting out a 2000 copy. It's got a cartridge with it's got got like cow design on it and stuff. It's an exclusive collector's item. And as soon as they announced it, all of the comments below said, Doug's transforming for the dogs are homeless, but I cannot support this. And I am eight bit lead guy says, Doug is not involved in this project whatsoever. He's not making any money.

So before the comic deal might be a hint. You should have just said suck a dick. Yeah, who cares? Yeah. Well, I've been hearing that for 10 years. I was, these are my values and this is what I've always done round. And now it's just been escalated to a huge culture where there's no shame now in going after someone's career now. Of course,

now there isn't fault. It's a badge of honor. And likewise, the backlash never existed before Trump, by the way. Trump kind of taught the right how to fight a little dirty. Not that I approve, but I'm just saying not that I approve of fighting dirty, but the right wingers came out on my behalf this time and went back and just smashed. There was a polygon rider and also an Nintendo Live a game's journalist, which is kind of an oxymoron. They came after me and all the right wingers

came out and just buried him alive. Over this. I was reading one of your tweet threads where you went over a point for point on all the projects you've done that have not suffered because of your beliefs, because there's always that threat of, oh, your project is going to suffer

because you've got this guy on your side. But you went through all the things you've worked on in like the last 10 or 20 years that have been total successes. And your endpoint was that art itself is beyond, I forget how you phrase it. It was like art itself is beyond censorship or something like that.

It's just I can't remember either. I probably made it up. It's really dick. If you think of how we consume art, we do it really to pleasure ourselves. It gives us a good feeling. I know. That's what I'm saying when you said Princess, what's your name up there?

Oh, yeah. What's the really pleasure in you? So why would you deprive yourself of a pleasure over, say, a political stance or sometimes even your religion? Yeah. In general, people are weak and they will compromise their politics unless they're just bury the needle left or bury the needle right who are just total soldiers about that. I don't have a problem separating the artist from the art. I like how Doug

saying it where you can't even help it because it's pleasure and people succumb to pleasure before politics no matter what. Nothing wrong with that. I don't say it. No. So my job is to make pleasurable stuff that everybody likes, right? Even the woke people and also do some. I'll get them. Yeah. Well, can you give us any spoilers on Earthworm Jim's origin story?

Is there anything we can do? I'll give you an exclusive. I mean, one thing that I broke on this story that I had never put in the story before. So this is a black and white that I'm working on of the origin where the suit has fallen on the worm. But this is what's going on in his DNA. There's a little chick in there.

That woman in the dress is a space fairy. And that's his DNA wound around her. And the campaign, there's a color version of this. If you go to Indiegogo, or through Jim Comic. And so the fairy dust is sparkling. And then you see the worm, the sparkles are all around them. And then it starts to grow flesh. And then it grows teeth.

And then it goes, good, good, good. And then the flesh is on their grew. And then it goes, good, good, good. And then the flesh is on their grew, and then it goes, groovy. So I had never, I had always been hated how all origin stories, they're rarely rooted in magic or fairy tale. They're rooted in science fiction. It's always like, you know, alien material, chemicals

caused a chain reaction, like Spider-Man and stuff like that. And in a mine, it's a, it is the suit had picked up this fairies dust in the story. And that's really where the whole story starts is on her. And I'm gonna develop that relationship where the, it's the space who got thrown off of the queen's ship, right? And it lands on a meteor and this fairy has lived on this meteor for 3,000 years looking

for us for a lover of anyone. She's never met someone else. Right. And so she picks up this suit and says, finally, a worthy love. She picks it up and there's nothing in there. Right. There's no head. So she puts the fairy dust in there and says, bring me a suitable lover.

Love her. Make him a great hero with the mind and heart of a child. And she throws it back off the meteor. And that's when it lands on Earth. Yeah. So I mean, over these five book series, Earthworm Jim and Princess have like this love hate thing going on.

And by the end, there might be trouble when the, when the, when the space fairy comes back to claim her husband. All right. Two chickens. We're talking about two two chicks one soup. Yeah. As he takes a sip.

One worm. I love that you, how you've got like the old, old you know like Don Bluth's old animation how it had that that raw sexiness to it That you guys you can't have anymore Sarkeesian came out against earthworm Jim because of princess what's her name really we were actually in her her paper her thesis paper on feminism and games and on how that it's all based on misogynism. But she says too, and she didn't realize that we were making fun of all of the princesses.

They were just kind of an object to collect. And you made fun of them by having princess. We literally didn't give her a name. We called her Princess What's Her Name because we said it literally doesn't matter. We were parodying other video games, not the case of woke feminism, but in the case of humor, in the, in the, you know, in defense of humor.

What's humor? Yeah, no, I didn't get it. It's, since I started thinking that there's a lot of people out there who just don't understand satire or jokes, everybody makes so much more sense. I know. I thought about that the other day. And they kind of group themselves. Like I've been having arguments with people on what is a based, you know, Sargon's rape

comments and he called in and was talking about calling medical groomer and all this stuff. And he told that MP that he wouldn't even rape her. Yeah. I'm trying to explain how that's not a joke. Right. To people who I don't think understand jokes. And to be honest, I don't think Sargon does like the way he's, um, go ahead, Doug, sorry. Well, it just seems like, uh, humor today is going to be, it's going to be taken away from us if we don't protect it. Just like every other right where you

should thinking like political rights or religious speech. Human needs to be protected or it'll be compromised and it'll no longer be culturally okay to laugh at certain things. And that's kind of where we're at. Comedians talk about how like, you know, half their gig is cut in half. Even that. The material is being culturally excised. Yeah.

I was trying to make abortion jokes and everybody in the studio jumped all over me because there are a bunch of snowflakes and cry babies. I was making jokes. Yeah. I'm King Pro Lifer. I heard that part of it. So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, soer. If you tell a funny joke, if I find it funny, all laugh, I might even get a bad ability for laughing. But I'm not going to say this must be scrubbed out of society, dickmasks, and cannot work

or make income or feed his family. It's the pleasure. You got it, Sean, I interrupt. Feed his drimmers. No, no, he's right about the comedians though. Comedians can't be comedians. I mean, there's comedians now who won't play college campuses because they're, they can't tell any jokes.

And with Disney owning pretty much all- world entertainment. Yeah, it's a weird, it is like a weird cultural landscape where you're going to movies that only have, like they're full of only priest humor, no offense dog, but it's like, no, no, it is left winged Puritanism. Yeah. Like whatever they find sacred, they're a bunch of secular church ladies.

Right. And so they own movies, so they own Hollywood TV, journalism, the university and all of education, they flat out on it. PBS just put on an author cartoon that has the same sex marriage. And I'm saying, forget what you think about same sex marriage. I'm only saying all of the politics only swing one way in all of these institutions. So there's no diversity of thought that you will have only one thought. Well, you have to be diverse in their way. Diverse in every way except diversity.

Well, I mean, diverse of the sex is diverse of skin color, diverse of some people can walk and some people in a wheelchair, but no diversity of thought. It is like that church lady thing is so funny because esterios, you know, whenever he's around, when he used to be around, and you would make jokes about, or call and, let's talk about trans or make any kind of jokes about, it's always like, oh, I don't know. It's a bad look. Yeah. You wouldn't laugh.

You wouldn't laugh? Not in the same way. Like, you can go too far. You can always go too far. I can lose clients. I can lose, I can lose like you can go too far. You can always go too far. I can lose clients. I can lose, I can lose, I can lose firm gem. I can lose her firm gem over the wrong joke. I can lose the rights to do it.

Very possible. Can you really? Is that in the contract? Oh my God. Because just in the name of... It's like a sports star. This is true for any kind of intellectual property, by the way. Even if I was doing a Mickey Mouse comic.

Right. I could have the contract in every contract for that. It always says you will not do anything to detriment the strength of this intellectual property of a detriment or harm it, right? That's whatever a court in a jury decides and that means they can just say, hey, you're a little vocal about pro life,

little vocal for us. And you're a detriment, Tarpa. And here's the monetary damages of people who would not buy this cartridge or whatever. Right. So, when you talk about the church lady, remember, the church lady used to, it was Dana Carvey, he'd go, who made you think that, Satan? Satan?

And now the leftist church ladies, they all, what made you think that, hmm, hatred or bigotry? Yeah. He's not wrong at all. That's racism. Yeah. For a chance. That's it. No one's afraid of anybody's church lady anymore They're mocked the nuns and everything they've been utterly dismantled. No one fears no one fears offending me walking around saying God damn it all the time or making making Jesus hang on a cross jokes totally acceptable

I try not to say God damn it when you're on by the way I try to respect you at least that way, but you cannot say we're all terrified or you get a little chill up your spine when you make that wrong joke. You make an inward joke. We all know we've all been culturally trained that and so that is one political ideology just making I'm not obviously not defending all of these, including abortion humor or mocking victims or weak people or anything like that, but you just can't speak freely and speak your mind anymore. They're after you're what's rolling around in your head. They're on what's in your head. Yeah, I agree. I've read that you did the original voices for the game too,

for the Earth from Jim Gain. That's true. That was purely because they threw in, because I was the creator, they threw in just temp voice, they go, what do you sound like? Yeah. So I'd go, I was imitating my red neck. Dude, I have been doing that out my whole life. Really? Yeah. I'll go, I'll do it all the time. Yeah. That was my friend Ellis Goodson and I used to we played paintball at our first video game company in 91. He's a he's a total redneck from Oklahoma. Yeah. And we a guy shot him like from way far away when he hit him in the elbow. Yeah. Right on the bone. Funny bone. And he yelled and he goes, ow!

That was easy for a different gym. Perfect. You can see it for rights now. Oh yeah, it was groovy too. Yeah. And then actual earthworm gym was an actual burp. Like I had to burp that whole earthworm gym. That was an actual burp.

That's cool. God, I have this, if this extremely embarrassing comic that I made, like started drawing of earthworm gym when I was like, I don't know, how old. You got to show that. I feel like I should put it in the Patreon just so people can laugh at it. It's so even talking about it is making me sweat, you know, like a gross and not a rage way and like it's extreme. This will be the largest Patreon rate since the beginning. I mean, if they put it in a big tier, if people want to see it, I'll put it out with the bonus episode.

We got a bonus episode coming out tomorrow or yesterday or whenever this actually comes out. I'll post it on there so everybody can laugh at it. Everybody please don't post. They pay for it. You know, a couple of months. I'd love to. I love fan art and it cracked. The worst it is, the better. I think there's nothing close to Earth. We're gym in the fan art. It even starts with a dick joke. In the comment that I thought was just the funniest thing in the world.

Don't worms look like dick. I'll post it. I'll post it. I like dick. Yeah I'm sorry for your wife. I would love I would love you to make fun of it If you have the time to look at it and say well, this or a please do all right. Does anything make you a rage Everything everything I disagree with everything, but Everything everything I disagree with everything, but Certainly my that is that's a serious. I should come up with a funny answer, but abortion is murder in the womb like to wipe you out Time travels do you think time travel abortion? For it I caught pre-borsion. Do you think that That back to the future if you go back in time and change events

that you're aborting all of the fetuses that never were, all of the people that never were, does that count as abortion? I guess technically. Yes, wow. I just don't, I just think there's a sacredness to life. No, I'm not talking about pre-sperm and egg. I'm talking about innocent human life

where something's taking down there. We know it's a human being. We know that if it follows a natural trajectory, it'll either be naturally aborted or naturally come to term. I just think life is other people's lives are so sacred that you just don't wipe them out before they even get a chance to exist. That's a terrible thing to do, to completely blot your voice out. It is worse than slavery.

What we do to black babies is worse than what we did to black adults, because at least black adults had the pleasure of getting to live long enough to get to be a slave. We don't even get, let done born blacks have that. We wipe them out before they even have a chance to be oppressed. Well, what about all the unspent money in my bank account? What if that don't I have a right to my to my tax money? Yeah. Who's paying for all these? There's a baby living cost you money. Oh, it does. It does. What am I paying for every year? If not, if not more people blowing up brown people besides that. No, so change the law to not pay for me. don't go, look, we can't afford to sustain these

slaves. So let's not free them. Let's just keep owning people because of their skin color. That's not a rational argument. You have to say, well, what to find some other way, because all I know is the right to life has a greater existence than a greater presence than your right to even keep your money. I mean, it's hard. I don't know if you can argue with that, but the other side of the argument is like, well, I just don't want to do it. I want to screw whoever I want with no consequences. Right. I get the appeal, like I said, I get the pleasure of that. It's why you want to make some innocent life pay for yourself pleasure. Oh, Doug. All right.

All right. I always feel bad for all the people who have gone through it and have to hear the argument all the time. Like that's what I, that's my opinion on it. I don't want to insult every single female member of your audience, but I'm a lot of believe you. I'm a lot of people. I'm a lot of people.

All right, Doug. Thank you very quickly. Very quickly. Just like to say, Doug, I grew up in the early 90s and I just want to say that what was the fondest of them? That's right. I would have to tell you. Yeah.

I just want to thank you because one of my fondest memories that I still have and I don't know why the six out in my head is going when I was like six or eight years old to KB toys in Bessadena before it closed down. Yeah. And buying a copy of Earthworm Jim 2 and playing the hell out of that game. And it actually introduced me to classical music with that level where you're flying around inside the intestine with moon lights and not a plane. So thank you.

And that's the flying blind cave salamander. Yeah. Yeah. So animation and that and my buddy Mark Lawrence into the backgrounds and Tommy Tellerie could do the music. It was wonderful, those were great times. And because I was just, we were in like our late 20s, we were 27, 28, 29, 10 guys just goofing around

making the game as best we could. And the games were simple enough that you were working on art and not working on 8,000 frickin' polygons and a render tracing thing. It was a table and animating and scanning them in. And it was just a jolly wonder if I look back on it and we just fell into it. It's one of those times it's a great blessing. I can't believe how lucky we are.

Just 10 guys working hard and partying hard and sweating and grind and grinding out those friends. Sometimes they kiss and out the whole team but we took massive male showers. There's only one straight. Yeah, you're going to touch something. Don't you agree with me that everyone who uses those gender swap Snapchat filters is a closet at home as sexual Well, I've been tempted to use one just to see what would happen So yeah closet at home and then Hal's in homosexual right?

Everyone's closet at home as sexual I got I guess I got to try it because that would be neat and then I go and then I go wait a minute I'm kind of gay Yeah, thoroughly disgusted by every aspect of that. 80s girl made me do it, but it made me a big fatso. Made me look like my grandma was a big pumpkin head, because it mistook my beard for a face. So it just made a chick with a face the size of my beard.

I couldn't find your real one. I said, it was like six acres. So, all right. All right. I'm going to do the eight-year girl. What? I couldn't find your real one. Is that it? It was like six acres. All right. All right. What? What? Did you do it on 80s girl?

Did you turn her around? Yeah, she did the man one, which also pissed me off. I'm like, well, now I got to think about this. I'm banging you. What the hell's the matter with you? You're using tools of Satan on me to pervert my Christian straightness, heterosexuality That you wish I don't approve. It's of the devil. It's a corrupting effect. We got to stop this

All right, Doug stop stop telling people that I need to have kids. You're really messing things up No, I think he does. I can't wait. I can't wait to you We're gonna turn you dick. You're gonna you're gonna love it and you're gonna do it. This is your turn. You're gonna do it. Because I believe that you're gonna, your heart and your strength and your masculinity is gonna come in.

Yes. What's that here? Get out of here. This is starting to work. If it starts laying into the bigger tits thing, it's a lost cause. All right. The other thing is it turns, it turns your wife

instead of this, this girl who's always trying to be skinny and like watch her way. Yeah. They look like a man who worked out and they're all thin, and trying to look at me. They turn the dog day reverse, reverse. Stop. You're, you're, you're killing it.

Yeah, you gross me out. Yeah. The units of Will and Dorf. It's like the few, beautiful. This, this, this, this, it's a fertility goddess. They come walking in their hips. It's like the units of Will and Dorf. It's like the few beautiful, it's a fertility goddess. They come walking in their hips, get this wide. Oh.

Wait, hold up. Doug, you also have to say that it changes the male brain to make you attracted to that, because right now you need to see the look on Dixface. Yeah, get out of here. Is your wife know you're on the internet saying these horrible things? No. Two rims down, two rims down.

She thinks I'm in my jerk off room. She has a firewall and a router that prevents any of his media from getting into the house. Your show is gonna get better when you become a dad. It's like endless material. It's gonna be something. Now you're a big group of people. It's just like every single big group in Peabee,

little gross, scabby little kid. It's like it gives you all this, they scream all the time, you'll give you material. And this material for the rest of your life. All right, all right, I'll think about it. Especially if you don't have kids. That's good, that's a win. Thank you, Doug.

Thank you so much for calling me here. I heard from Jim on Indiegogo. Yeah, Earthworm Jim on Indiegogo and Doug on YouTube, check it out. He's got a great show. Guys, good work on five years. I look forward to another five years. Bring me back on in 10.

Thank you. Thank you. See ya. There we go. Hey, real quick, I want to say one of the first things I heard from Scott Adams back when he started coming on Trump is he said that when he became a comic, he pretty much figured out that about his, by his estimate, one third of people have no sense of humor. Yeah.

Like you were saying, it totally changed, and it totally was an epiphany to me. I'm like, holy fuck, it makes a lot of sense. It makes so much sense because you're sitting there trying to explain why things aren't offended to someone who cannot conceive of something is, let me get harmful opinions on. Lowered my rage immensely when I figured that out. And it's funny, you can think back and you're like, I know exactly who those people are in my life too.

What does life look like to these people? Of great. They live in fucking pleasant places. No, they think that people are walking around assaulting their eardrums in their brain all the time. They think that we're doing it on purpose, that we're like purposely trying to hurt them. And we're laughing at insane thing.

Right, insane things that are not funny at all. Yes. Harmfully there, I think you gotta unmute yourself. Oh shit, Denzel, Denzel has to scoot. Oh my God, unbelievable. Denzel, get the hell in here for a minute. Oh hi, hey, hey, hey, you got a scoot soon, right? I'm doing ready, Ben. Oh, wonderful, where the hell in here for a minute. Oh hi. Hey, hey, hey, you got you got a scooch soon right? I've been a wonderful where the hell have you been you giant

Well a lot of things happen to me. Okay, namely I found other hobbies For now what yeah, I'm actually working towards making What making a what? Porn oh, no Pornography Behind the camera actually that was gonna be like joke Not video photography photography straight up That's not porn art art. You're shooting you're shooting porn a graphic art now, but yeah playboy is not porn

If there's no if there's no come shot, that is not important. Yeah, you are, you are a genius. You are gonna pull, you are gonna pull so much pussy in San Diego as a photographer. You are a fucking genius. That's the point. And looks do not matter in that world. Oh, what are you saying?

I'm not saying, I'm not saying that matters. To the rest of us, one, and raised, do not matter. How long have you been a photographer? Well, I just started doing it about two, three months ago. I just did my first shoot, two months ago, so two months. I got a camera, so he figured out my escape on the life. I'm trying to figure out what I want to do. And then I started playing guitar and that sucks.

Yeah, it starts off. You got to play bass. What are you talking about? Oh, Jesus. I do. Also, bass. I'm already a bass player. I'm fantastic at bass.

But for some reason, the skill just doesn't translate over to guitar. I don't get it. Do you just lay on the top floor? Yeah. Are you dating? Do you have a girlfriend now or what? No, no. I broke up with my girlfriend. Two months ago. I want to say any.

I mean, I totally have a girlfriend. She's just off mic right now. No, I broke up with her like mid-summer last year. Uh huh. Why? Because I was, I had other things that I mid-summer last year. Uh-huh. Why? Because I was, I had other things that I want to do with my time. For our family. Yeah, for our family.

For our family. That's how I was. So wait, so now your new hobby is going to be the photograph, pornographic photography. That's what you're getting into. What's your plan? Uh, well, I need to getting into. What's your plan? Well, I need to work into or get into budwaw, I need to get a client risk and do all that.

But this, this is like a life, your life is following an awesome trajectory by the way. I'm just telling you that I don't forget how old you are, but I'm like, I wish I could have done it, go back and be 20 in my 20s and be an erotic photographer. That's a regrettable way to do that. That's a money to do this.

How do you need money? You need money to pay rent. You should. I just saved my money from work. It's called saving. I just saved you, Bob. I'm the guy who gets better lenses and stuff. I know a bunch of other other photographers already so it's not as if I can't get my hands on lenses. Have you had an erotic photo shoot yet? Have you taken pictures of an naked woman?

No, not yet. Okay. Not with that. I have that in your bio. Everybody's got to start somewhere and you got to have goals to work towards right though When is your goal of when is your goal of having, when do you wanna have your first erotic photo shoot? Yesterday. By the end of summer. By the end of summer, that's a long, I'm talking, this month, you gotta have it in.

When does school start? Yeah. Yeah. That's simple. I feel like teacher shot, the teachers. Are you coming to Vegas? Road rage Vegas a June 22nd We'll get you some erotic photography going on. That's easy. We'll do it on the bus

We're gonna pack a dickhead bus with a hundred guys and two prostitutes That is not the right ratio Oh, under prostitutes and two guys All right, well, you got to bump up your timeline. So about the right, all you have. No cross-track. Yeah, I got, I mean, I have, I don't, don't really have a ton of time anymore.

I had started, started a company and started doing like freelance IT shit or I guess it's not freelance anymore because it's a company, but that sort of thing. Fuck that shit. Focus on the erotic photography. Yeah, that's going to be way more fun. All right, does anything make you rage? And then you got to that sort of thing. Fuck that shit. Focus on the erotic photography. Yeah, that's gonna be way more fun. All right, does anything make you rage? And then you gotta get out of here. Yeah, auto dialers, spam calls.

Yeah. Nearly every fucking phone call that I've gotten in the last week. And I get like six or seven a day, and spam calls. Yeah. It's so ridiculous. And I don't know why it's happening, but it's just, I feel like every time I create a new domain,

I get like one more call added. Yeah, they ruined my shower. They ruined my classical music shower this morning. All right, buddy, get out of here. I just want to say congratulations on making it to five years. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Call in again, fuck Pete. For sure.

For sure. Peace, I'm joking. I know all right. That's all right. That's all right. That's all right. Thank you. Call in again, fuck Pete. For sure. That's all right. Pete, I'm joking.

I know I'm going to get a text. Well, I was going to say something. Yeah, I just want to say it's always good to talk to you. You sound a lot calmer on the show, always, than some of the tweets I see you send. So I think you should, you know, make an appearance more often. I think I'm going to remember. I feel like I have a calming, a calming influence on you. She's calling.

You're just misreading his tweets. Maybe. Yeah. Just read them in my tone of voice. Maybe coach doesn't get humor. Yeah. Maybe. Maybe.

All right. Bye, Dan. Have a good one, y'all. See ya. Bye. Harmful opinions. Are you there? Yeah, man. So it's been a bit of a boom a moment. No, no, no. Hi. Harmful opinions. Are you there?

Yeah, man. Sorry, I had a bit of a boomer moment. No, no, no. That was Denzel had to get on and he had to run. Thank you so much for calling in. Holy shit, it has been a long time since the first time you called in. And so much has changed. Yeah.

Yeah. The world, the internet has changed in all of the ways that you that we could have never imagined that you were talking about the first time you called in with all that candid shit and censorship and blah, blah, blah. It's remarkable. It's leaking into real life too. Yeah, it is. What do you think about all this Sargon stuff that's going on? I saw right before we started the show, I saw that Sargon is now threatening to sue Ralph Ethan Ralph at the Ralph Retort because it's what I've come to expect. It's what I've come to expect. There are no values there because if it jokes against him, it's

bad and it's not good and it has to be annihilated. If he says it, of course, jokes are fine. They have to be protected. Who If he says it, of course, jokes are finally happening. Who else do we know like that? And I've got to say, you talking to Doug about jokes got me fired up, because that's what it is. People don't get it. People tend to like say, comedy needs to be defended. And then they go because it's safe,

and it doesn't do anything, and it doesn't hurt anyone, and it doesn't have any power. It's like people trying to defend the Second Amendment and saying, guns can't hurt anyone. They don't do anything. Comedy can be very powerful for hurting people, especially authority. Think of the great dictator by Charlie Chaplin.

They've got people fucking laughing at Hitler during a war with Germany. That's powerful. That means something. If nobody didn't do anything, why the fuck would you defend it? You did a video that changed my thinking about, I think you called it, it's just a joke where people trying to defend Daniela by saying, well, it's just a joke and as if it's

only okay for him to teach his dog to do a Nazi salute because it's a joke. Let's say he was fucking serious. Let's see, he was a hardcore neo-nazi and actually wanted to train a Pug army. So fucking what? Yeah, it was the idea that if you defend speech only because it's a joke, then you make the entire argument about whether or not something is a joke, which is entirely subjective. Not only is it entirely subjective, but it's also, it's built on a flawed premise that,

like exactly like you're saying, jokes are not harmful, they cannot be harmful. They can't be more effective than so-called hate speech, right? So every time somebody says, well, it's just a joke. It's like, well, yeah, but you're giving them the argument by saying it's just a joke, because now all they have to do is prove that they didn't think it was funny. Right. Right. And you're selling out that you're selling, you're lying about the nature of speech, which

is that it is always harmful and more powerful. And if Nazis did want to recruit new Nazis, they would train a pug to hail Hitler. That is the joke is what makes it powerful. Like that's the pleasure of experiencing the joke and opening you. It's why advertisements use jokes because it makes you receptive to buying their fucking product. You can't say it's just a joke because jokes are the most effective types of speech.

They bypass your rational mind. Yeah. Well, they give you an excuse that the armor you've got up and they slice behind it. I like Doug said, he'd laugh at an abortion joke if it was funny and he'd feel guilty, but he couldn't help, but like some little spark of your viewpoint has gotten into him. Yeah. Well, I always thought, I mean, I'm sort of on the pro-lifeside of things. Yeah.

But I was looking at the onion. I mean, I think everyone is. Like, I think the majority of people is on the pro-lifeside of things. It's just, we also kind of know the reality of life and want to give people a duo of onion. This onion headline, abused 12 year old Alabama girl, doesn't think she can handle being a mom on top of everything else.

Fuck, that hit me pretty hard, man. Yeah. I was gonna say, Dick, you, from the very beginning, I remember when people asked you, oh, is Dick a character, like, back when you did Dr. Phil. Right. How are you joking? And you never gave an answer.

It was beautiful. It was like, I don't, I don't, you tell me. Yeah. Is it joke to you? Which way is worse? Exactly. Is it worse than I would make this as a joke knowing the harm that it causes?

Or is it worse that I'm trying to do this as a joke? And I like how it's worse. And it's like, there's never an answer to that. It's like, that's the whole point. Once you answer it, you've failed. You've given in. Yeah. Yeah.

The, the Sargon thing's so funny. I want to endlessly pick apart what he's saying is his joke. Like, because people. Did he do the second part of the joke? No, the last month, a month or a year's later, where he recently did a video where he said a paraphrasing. People are really pressuring me about saying I wouldn't rape Jess Phillips. Maybe with enough pressure, I would.

And it goes, but let's be honest, there's not enough alcohol in the world for that. I think he doesn't understand what a joke is. I mean, yeah, it's a joke, but you're still calling her ugly. It still means that. You've just called someone ugly in a really sharp way that's going to... Yeah, the punks finding, possibly. You've got to defend trying to make someone sting like that. You can't just go, it was a joke, so it doesn't mean anything blah, blah, blah.

Yeah. You have to have the fucking balls to say, yeah, I was trying to knock that bitch down a peg or something. Yeah. I was trying to hurt her feelings by a used imagery that is traumatic to a lot of people. And that is the comedy is when people try and wheeze out of shit like this. Yeah.

And take comedy's power away and say, oh, you can ignore this because it doesn't mean anything. Well, then any other joke doesn't mean anything. A joke against a tyrannical dictator doesn't mean anything and can be ignored when it could have been a source of inspiration for people to not be afraid anymore. Yeah. It is, I wouldn't even rape, I wouldn't even rape you. That's what he said. He left out the rest of it because it's a butcher joke of the, who is the guy who actually said it? Jar Bolsonaro. Jar Bolsonaro? Yeah, really? Yeah, the original guy who said it said, I wouldn't even rape you because you wouldn't deserve it, right? Which makes it a joke because

you have to think, well, what would not deserve? What would make you deserve it in your eyes? Right, it's funny, but I wouldn't even scratch my call. Oh, that is a, that's, yeah, and the guy's present to Brazil. And you know how you know it's a joke because you're immediately laughing. So, it's version, it's just confusion. It's like, what do you mean? Right. That was like, what do you mean?

What's his name? The, the, it's not to get out of the room. It his name? The, the, the, it's jumped around. It has jumped around. It went from a joke to satire to something that was supposed to be offensive to just, for the purpose of just. It's a meta joke about the press. It's also holy. It's a lot. Which I think in the end to be with what's your name Victoria Darbyshire? He said it's a meta joke is to show that really the press are the ones who are attacking her. And attacking her with my joke.

Yeah, I mean, what a load of wink. It really is. Well, yeah, that's the organ for you. Anything make you a rage, man? It's been so long. Oh, fuck, yeah. Yeah, what are games? Video games.

Okay. They're getting shitier. Yeah, but there's shitty, not even in an acceptable way, not even in a respectful way. They're not even a big enough pile of shit to entertain people with how terrible they are. I pre-order games. I think it's a bad idea to pre-order games, but I stream on Twitch,

and if I pre-order a game, I figure, hey, if it's good, we'll have a good time, we'll enjoy it together. If it's bad, I can make fun of it. No, these new games, this new breed of games, games like Anthem, games like Rage 2, they're so shit, you can't even laugh at them. They're just tepid.

There's nothing to rip on. Yeah. If in the new Final Fantasy 7, if they give Tifa smaller tits or put clothes on her, I will riot. I will burn. I'm going to be a one minute talking about that. I noticed, I noticed suspiciously that in the video they put out, she was the first first one the preview for Final Fantasy VII, Tifa was not in it as very suspiciously because I only angrily watched it to see if they would shrink her tits. They're still drawing the clothes. I feel like they were testing the waters to see if they could, if they, how much they

could commit to giving her. Do you think the, do you think there's something up a tit-y Trojan horse? You're, you're you're they they want you in the stoutie and then when you buy the game is fuck the tits are gone yeah the tits are gone if they shrink if she is down even one polygon on those tits I will fucking riot it's gonna be I don't care who I don't care what I have to do that's the end game for me it's gonna I'm gonna it's I'm gonna go on a rampage there'll be the true going to, I'm going to, it's, I'm going to go on a rampage. There'll be the true, true Final Fantasy. I'm going to be knocking on doors with a giant

sword. Yeah. If they all these advances in physics simulation and titty jiggling technology, and now they're going to take the tits away. What was it all for then? What was it all for? Why do we even, why do we have it if we're just taking this is supposed to be an Escapist fantasy for me. I have no tits in the real world. I don't need a Compute computer game to also experience no tits god damn it. This is important to me. It's fucking important to me. You should understand the game if you're gonna remake it. If I swear to god one inch gone. Well I'm gonna compare him side by side if any Tits are all is gone from her Riot Riot Riot Riot that's a good point my whole life is no tits. That's why I play video games for tits

Yeah, yeah You think these fucking companies that have done everything else predatory to fuck you out of cash would at least realize They could have it with no tits and be like hey give us five more bucks and you can have any size titties you want. Oh my God. What was that? I wish they were greedy enough to do that. What was that game? The boy bug game. Dead or alive. Dead or alive beach volleyball. Yes. You could buy them like outfits. I think I get every outfit in the game. I love that game. You got more to combat 11, right? Oh, yeah.

It was terrible. I talked about that a couple of weeks ago. A lot of the women were a bit more covered up, but did you notice the new character, Cetrion? Her tits are out. Yeah, the earth witch or something like that. Yeah, they're using Carrot and Stick to make you like the new character more. I think it's a psychological trick.

That's smart. They put in the titties with the new one to lower the risk of you you like the new character more. I think I can get a cycle. I'm trying to find the smart. They put in the titties with the new one to lower the risk of you not liking the new one. And they put the hijab on the old one that I already did like. Yeah. The, that game is so fucking stupid. All of the, everything you have to spend hours grinding for is like different versions of a Gundam suit that they slap on the hottest jail bait character in the game. Like why, who is this even for?

This is for another computer to enjoy. Not a man, not a human man. Were you the one that was saying you had to unlock the fatalities to see them? Yeah, to see the moves. What the f**k? They're in the game. If you can figure out what they are, you can do them without unlocking them. Yeah, so they just... That is something.

I'm going to sound like the guy who says I read Playboy for the articles, but I like Mortal Kombat 11 for the gameplay. Do you really? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I guess it takes all kinds of things. I would have been a good on PS4, so I could kick your ass. Now, can we not play cross-platform?

I don't think so. I don't think so. I'll take you on to Tetris so. I'll take you on and to Tetris 99. I'll kill you. Words with friends live on Twitch. Game Boy over internet. Yeah, I'm down. We just got to figure out the whatever systems are compatible. I'm down to give my ass kicked by harmful opinions. Yes. I would love to see that. I'll let my nephew play you. Then I'll have a fighting chance. I don't have a chance against someone whose nervous system isn't destroyed by drinking. Yeah.

All right, man. Thank you for calling in. Thanks for having me. Congratulations on surviving five years on this fucking dystopian hellscape of an internet. Thank you. That's about it summed up as well as it could be. I think maybe I'm some kind of a cockroach. It's kind of a stick.

And I will, and I would survive anything on the, like if they haven't brought me down, yeah, I don't think that, oh, by the way, book, you remember when I was talking about Bogey's teeth? Yes. So I took book, what's his name? Bogey or Bogey? I don't know. Bogey.

Bogey, I took that video of me ripping on his Bookie or Boogie? I don't know. Boogie. Boogie. I took that video of me ripping on his teeth for like 20 minutes and posted it on YouTube under the title, how Boogie changed my, fixed my depression with his new teeth. Dude, and it linked baited me. I watched it because of that. I sent it to him and I said,

hey, you helped me out of a really dark place. And you always helped. God. And then he tweeted today or something like someone was saying, my new teeth look worse than my old ones. Someone. Here's a picture of my old teeth. So he definitely, I think he saw it.

It was just great. Yeah, you can't ask for anymore. Hey, the old ones had character. Yeah. Hey, the old ones had character. Yeah, and there's, I think, I think, between looking cartoonish and grotesque, it's, you know, it's apples to oranges in a lot of ways, but I will say to, like, to cartoonish, I would say looks worse than grotesque. That's my only, that was my only point. I would have thought Boogie, who's all about

positive messages and changing people's lives, would have kept the old teeth. And I acted like one of those ex-Heroen addicts. Look what could happen to you. Yeah, he should have got his new teeth. He milked so many videos out of that. He should have got his new teeth implanted that looked all fucked up like the old teeth.

They were just safe. And let, right? Like, he, I don't want those chicklets only replace the teeth. He still has. Yeah, we'll be cartoonish, but withholding it. I'm gonna have nightmares about falling out tonight. He looks like, like he looks like when in a cartoon, when they get those chattering teeth traps jammed in the, like put them in a dog's mouth and the dog goes, are like that. That's what it looks like.

You can imagine him biting down on something hard and them shattering. Like an animation in Bugs Bunny. The ugly ones, the rotted ones, they're natural so your brain can ignore them. Like when you see someone with fucked up teeth or rotted teeth, your brain will block them out over time. His teeth are so unnatural. Their boogies teeth are so unnatural. They're in like the uncanny valley drawn to it. You just stop looking. Yeah, they're like a neon sign in there. Gotcha. Pulling your gaze in. Anyway, harmful. Thank you for calling in, buddy. Mind if I quickly show. Oh, please, please. Show away.

Yeah. Twitch.tv slash harmful opinions. Come follow me. We'll have a good time together. Mm. All right, get out of here, buddy. I've got some more people call. I see FIGBAD in there.

Oh, cool. FIGBAD. This one, I wanted to read this before I forget. I got a ton of emails about SSRIs and exercise and depression. It's kind of been interesting and it's been entirely positive. Like the feedback I got from our last couple episodes talking about mental health. Yeah.

Quote. And how are you, the madness? Yeah. Did the Jews are behind it? Yeah. That's the moment. It's all a shame. Jews are behind it? Yeah. That's the moment. It's always Sean. We say,

that's the only thing that's parentheses. Oh, sorry. You say the parentheticals. Yeah, you see, we'll see. That's a, I don't, you know, I don't think like that. I don't think like that.

So I'm a sack. Yeah, this is his act. Me and there. Me and there. Okay. Okay. Parentheses is Jews. Okay, sorry. Quotes is is Jews. Okay, sorry.

Quotes is homos. Is it no? No, no, no. You could tell me anything, and I'd be like, oh, is that, is that no? Again, so-called sci-chi-a-tree. Yeah. This is, and I wanted to read this one that came in.

There's, you know, I've got, man, I've got a lot too. You've got a lot. Yeah, we could do a whole show on this. We really could. And honestly, it is a, it's a huge, I feel like the show is kind of always about that anyway. Like, it's all entertainment. It's just like, please just give me something to pay attention to.

So I stopped thinking about life for like an hour or a camp fucking, I really need it today. I really need to listen to Mr. Plinkett rip apart rip apart the Star Wars prequels another time because other people's suffering is the cure for my mental illness is the care for my depression. You have zero time game. You do need some things to distract and I don't think that's bad. I mean, it's nice, but if you live your life that way, then maybe it keeps you from doing other things. You want to have

it just you live your life completely online or something. It's been interesting. Yeah. Sponsors have been very interesting. A couple of jokers sending in sending in prank emails like that exercise didn't help with their depression or stuff like that. Silly prank. But most people agree with me. Everyone else who's not sending me a prank email agrees with me. He's not gaslighting you. A bunch of people were gaslighting me, saying that I was wrong. Well, it's, you know, it's going around. Gaslighting, it needs to be stopped. It really arouses contempt in my heart.

So when anybody says they were gaslighting. Gaslighting, they go, okay. You couldn't float, you couldn't float that by anyone. What was happening to you? Everybody resoundingly said, oh yeah, that sounds reasonable that he was encouraging underage fans to send him nude pics in the name of body positivity.

That's totally normal. Okay, here it is from Ellen. Hi, Dick, thanks for your rant in the newest episode. Really resonated with me. I know you've had a billion emails about this, but I wanted to share. I'm a bipolar. I've always been vehemently against personally taking mental health drugs. I've had a few tries on them and they've always just been fucking dumb and made me feel like an alien.

I prefer to research and try to fix my brain myself, maybe a bit of a control freak crying, laughing face emoji. I went to the doctor once to get my benefit signed when I was temporarily unable to work. So you see she's trying to get her benefit signs as she can get welfare. She. Yeah. I do my best and I'm mostly functional,

but have had to have a break occasionally. I'm not Jesus. My kind of a doctor refused to sign my benefit form unless I took SSRIs. After I had told her, I would do anything but that. She said that therapy was a bad idea because it would probably be too expensive for me. And that this was the only option I had. A country she had. She in this one? No, no, she's not in this one. She say, yeah, but I don't want to say. No, no, not in this one. Not in this one. She say? Yeah, but I don't wanna say. No, I'm just, I'm curious.

A Western one. I mean, yeah, of course. Of course, yeah. And one that functions like a society with socialized medicine, which we also have to enough of a degree. To a degree. I mean, there is, you can get health care

if you don't have any in this kind of, it's like called county. You know what I mean? Right, yeah. For some stupid reason, I didn't think to just take the prescription and pretend to take the pills. Yeah.

I asked her. Well, she's not taking, yeah. Oh no, she, yeah. I wouldn't have thought of that either. Yeah. No, that's right. Huh, yeah, I probably would have, yeah. That's your life hack right there.

You've taught me that. Yeah. Go along with the flow until it's untenable. I asked her if there were any side effects and she was super vague about it, brushing it off, et cetera. I gained probably fucking 10 kilo in about a month. Holy shit, I didn't bring the 100 pounds, by the way. That's 100 pounds in the US imperial metric system.

Yeah, yeah, 10 kilos. 100 pounds of weight you gain. Well, 10 kilos is 2.2 pounds. Yeah, but on a woman and the metric system, no, no, it's 20. In bed. By the way, no, a kilogram is 2.2 pounds. Yeah, so 10 would be, you're right. You're right. It's 20, wait a minute, it's over 20 pounds.

Yeah, it's a shitload of weight. But on a woman, that's 100 pounds. That's why I set a hundred pounds. Yeah. Sorry, I was a, yeah. In bed, it's incalculable. I gained probably 10 kilos in the first month and it's still fucking with my metabolism.

Three, I didn't bring in some kind of the amount of weight gain that it's making women have. That's the real problem. A lot of them deal with crazy women, not fat women. No, you two to one women are on these things to men. Wait, really? Yes. Yeah. That's one of that was one of my well articulated points that I brought in because they'll because they're they're much more likely to talk about it. They're much more likely to seek therapy. They're much more likely to talk about their mental states. Well, and they complain a lot more. I think this is what he just said.

You know, coach, coach is right. You know what else I read? People who have seen the commercial are 17 times more likely to ask for the medicine holding their doctor. Fuck. Is that right? Yeah. That's what I was saying. How do you even come up?

How do you even, well, you know, those surveys, like, where did you hear about this? It's the people who wrote the TV commercial. A specific drug or, I don't know. I mean, with all these studies, I kind of, it's just very possible to be sure on you. I don't know why, but I don't know how it was. Hold on. But the fact that the commercials exist, make me think that that's true. Like why else would they exist?

Well, like that erection medicines give you four hour erections. You're like, that's not exactly right. That's an warning. That's an excuse to call every ex-girlfriend to every head. Right. But that is dangerous. But it doesn't happen. It's like the fact that it is on TV.

It's very rare. The fact that it's on TV is to get young men into the doctor playing with experimental erection medication. The fact that it's on TV is not to warn you. It's to prompt you into action. I mean, that's my point. Yeah, I mean, I never thought, I always just took him the way I watch those commercials, like, oh, well, if you have like a problem,

then you get the medication. Like, if you're healthy, like, I would just never think to get it. That's me. Yeah, you're not. Most people are idiots. Yeah, the way I think about it is, I don't have three hour erections, which would still be safe. Yeah. Right. Right. Right. Right. What do you mind owns a, owns a pharmacy and he, it's strange how viagran Seattle's just go missing from his pharmacy. Oh, I don't doubt it.

Yeah. He says it's an amazing, an amazing, uh, what's the word? Performance and answer. Uh, of course. Yeah. Last time I was dating girl, it was her birthday. He gave me some, I didn't use it because I'm too proud. And I was, no, I regret it because from what I understand, it makes it a lot of fun

more than usual. I've never done it. I've never popped up. Have you? You're a fiddle around coach. I know you have. No, I was on bachelor parties where guys are popping them like candy and I didn't I didn't partake because I just like same as you. I just felt like I didn't partake, because I just, like, same as you, I just felt like maybe I have to one day, but these guys were on point, like fucking teenagers. Really? So, in the four men in this room, none of us have taken erection enhancing right after the show, boys, we got to get ourselves little blue pills popping my meat. I know the place.

Also, maybe not, maybe not the studio. Also, I was having a, it's never even a surprise. Right, we got tables here. Yeah, that's the, we're, maybe not the studio. Also, I was having a, it's never even bright. Right, we got tables here. Yeah, that's the, I'm a knockover of beer. Let's go to Cheetah, see Hot Wheels. I wonder if she remembers Starris.

Hot Wheels. What? Also, I was feeling like a sack of shit and it could barely work because of Nazi, a Disneyist, my doctor said it's because I wasn't taking enough and she wanted to bump me into 200 milligrams of tape. This sounds very, very bad. Fine. Yeah. In order to bump me up to 200 milligrams a day. This sounds very, very

bad. In order to get your disability, I guess I could see that future more easily than I can not. A future where social benefits are tied to medication. I wonder what you was on because bipolar is usually a mood stabilizer, not a SSRI. Yeah, well, I mean, it could be both, but it's usually something to, like I think I mentioned Lomoatra gene. Something like that. Okay, here's my thoughts. Here's my whole thoughts on it.

The more and more access to medicine, we give everybody, the less and less quality, the quality of the medical care declines, because you're not making any more doctors. Being a doctor is a calling. It's like, if somebody who dedicate your entire life to artificial intelligence is not sophisticated enough to diagnose these human problems,

doctors are the more over tax they get, the more of a shitty job that they do. I think they're saying that too, aren't they? Oh, yeah. Doctors are complaining all the time about that. I mean, you go to your GP who's prescribing the wide majority of these things that they have no business. Oh, no, no, I think you have to,

I don't think a GP can prescribe those. Oh, most, most, most, they can descriptions come from a GP. Yes, you're kidding me. That's why the ads exist. So you go into your GP and say, give me the hook me up with this, they say, they got 15 minutes on you,

like, boom, Jesus. Oh, bro. I disagree with that. I mean, I disagree with that concept entirely. You mean you disagree that it should be able to do that, bro? No, I believe we've been having a totally different conversation this whole time. Yeah, I don't want, yeah, no, I don't want somebody

who's not, who doesn't have an expertise in psychology, or anything, I don't want that. I mean, well, that's how it is. Let me tell you something, my wife is in the medical field. And she has something called a seeker fatigue, they call it. Where, basically, like Dick just said, 15 minutes, you get 15 minutes for a patient. They're coming in and they're like,

I want this, I want this, I want this. You get that day, 15 minutes, after 15 minutes, after 15 minutes, after 15 minutes. Cause they're like, you're not fucking a Jesus here. You can't resist this. You're just like, okay, here, take in. My last doctor gave me the Z-Pack.

My last doctor gave me the Z-Pack. My last doctor gave me the Z-Pack. No, you didn't know that. Okay, we're gonna give you... No, as a matter of fact, now that I think about it, I did, I was talking to a doctor who said that the, who said that he almost never used to write, yeah, and he wasn't a psychiatrist.

He's doctor. Yeah, yeah, no he wasn't a psychiatrist. He's doctor. Yeah, yeah. No, let me think about it. Yeah. Let me say one last thing. Yeah. Every incentive in the entire industry is to make this happen. That's why I used to think that this was a conspiracy theory about these drug companies.

Right. Every incentive is to make that they have built this system. It's fucked. And that's why I just wanted to squeeze this in there. That's why AOC is getting play. It's why Warren's getting play. Because they're like, everyone knows it's fucked. Yeah.

But everyone's like, the Republicans are like, oh, capitalism. God knows, this is how, it's like, what? Everyone knows it's fucked. You're like around and they're gonna accept any message that says anything other than this, because it's completely fucked Yeah, but the real issue is not the the company. It's not big pharma. It's big insurance paying for the shit big insurance It's a big issue, but no one can tackle insurance because insurance has all the money in the world insurance Well, what I also found remarkable is I've been doing Pilates twice a week

Yeah, try to get my fat ass into shape and And I feel hard. I hear it's hard. I've never sweat like this. I mean, even the worst, even the most lies I've ever told, never. And I feel like such a fucking failure. Like I got to take breaks and we'll do 20 seconds. It'll be like, stand on one foot for five seconds. I'm like, how long is it been? It's like, it's still five seconds. I take breaks six times in that five seconds. It's so hard. It's one of those reformers to

a little machine with the sliding thing. And I'm so fat that the machine, it's harder for me than these little twinkle broads that are in there because I weigh so much that, you know, the sign or whatever it is of my gravitational weight down on the carriage. Like I start doing a plank and I throw the carriage through the wall on the thing, the springs that hold it together. Don't work as well on me because I'm so big, right? Yes. Very difficult. But even doing it, 2080s girl made me start doing it.

Wow. Because she does it every day. Doug is a fucking idiot talking about chicks who work out and look like men. He's her those fucking it's he was he was on a Untangent there. Yeah, I think he was what a fool Flashbacks of the first conversation where he was really pushing that you need to have kids and your wife will become You I remember all that. Yeah, He's talking about big fat wives. Jesus Christ, I'm still kind of,

I'm still kind of, yeah, shocked, where it's like, God, the vast majority, no, and that makes total sense. I told you, man, I would never go to a GP for that. Like I just, I don't, of course not. No, man, it's insane. Why would you, why would you go anywhere else to get your fix? Just get it from your GP? Because no, I want a, man, that's insane. Why would you, why would you go anywhere else to get your fix?

Just get it from your GP? Because no, I want a, no, I want a, yeah, I want a psychiatrist. But Sean, what you're forgetting is that you're operating at above 101. I know. Most people are not just math and math. Yeah, man, watching the Burger King ads,

promoting mental health, are not operating on your level. Yeah, you mentioned this multiple times. What, what is the burger king's ad campaign was mental, promoting mental health are not operating on your level. Yeah. You mentioned this multiple times. What is the burger king's ad campaign was mental was mental health. Right. What is the happy way? Yeah. It was co-opting the identity of the mentally healthy and this smart meme of mentally healthy to sell you hamburgers that caused depression.

That was my original problem with it and then we got it. Pist day or something. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like if you're the victim of sexual assault, they have a meal for you that you can come in. So can I say this? Can I say this one thing?

Is you, I know what you mean is shaped chicken finger. You're gonna bite it. Bite it out. Right. Show him, show him who's got the teeth. Oh, bite him out. Bite that dick right in half. Oh, God, how are you saying about the, I know exactly what you're saying.

I wanna say it in a way that you probably couldn't. Oh, gee. What the fuck? Cause you got people real angry about the workout. You know, work, oh, your mental health workout, right? Yeah, workout. What you're saying is 98% of cases could be solved by that. My point is people go in, they don't wanna work out.

They wanna pill. Well, I argue that 98% of cases could be solved by that. That's what people go in, they don't want to work out. They want to pill. Well, I argue that 98% of cases could be solved by that. That's what I'm saying. Oh, you think so? No, I do not know. No, I don't think so. No, what percentage? It's not a percentage thing.

It's a, if you're not doing this, supplementary thing you should expect to not be well. Right. Which might, the whole point, but I was, yeah. The whole point I was making with Pilates is, I feel great. Good. I feel, I wakeates is I feel great. Good.

I feel, I wake up and I feel a core under all this flabbing shit. I get up and it feels good for your psyche too. You feel like you're doing something positive for yourself. Yes, plus that there's always one, there's a least one chick who has a phenomenal ass. Of course, and every one of those classes can fall. They have incredible fucking cores. Those chicks who do Pilates.

Yeah. I mean, they're assed the core. What's that? No, but because they're assed, because the ass, it's accentuated by the core and vice versa. It sticks it out. Yeah. That's how a lot of cores last night.

Not enough. Every one of those, every, every chick at a strip club should be doing Pilates every day by contract. That is fucking bullshit what they get away with. You just see him, these two, he had an bizarre. All right, all right. My problem was, why is none of the fitness stuff covered at all? Oh, what do you mean?

By insurance. By insurance. Fitness by insurance. What, I should give you you mean, uh, by insurance? By insurance. Fitness by insurance. What, I should give you gym memberships? For sure. Yes, yes. My job pays for my insurance.

In fact, my insurance, hold on, hold on, hold on. Insurance pays for acupuncture, which does nothing. Yeah, and nothing. Yeah. But they can't buy me a new, like, a new pair of Pilates socks that I can take, like, they can't even fund a little bit of the only thing that makes me feel better about my, like none of it. Acu-puncture, they'll fuck you a fucking dog.

A dog weird, what? A dog weird, what? It is weird what they, I was pretty surprised to learn of some years ago that like, yeah, acu-puncture is covered by a lot of them. Because of the placebo effect. Yeah. Because they're saying, well, that's an, oh, aren't, anyway, I'm is covered by a lot of them. Because of the placebo effect. Yeah. Because they're saying, well, that's an,

oh, anyway, I'm getting off in a whole weird tangent. Very interesting. What's up? I gotta find it. I gotta find it. Okay. Find what? The name of movie, it's the last thing I want to drop on this

because it will, it blew my mind away and it speaks exactly to this. Control fire, control fire. It's on Netflix free watch control fire. It talks about perverse incentives in our our our healthcare industry. Yeah. Like you just said, why the fuck is the first thing you don't pay for a gym membership? Yeah. Of course, of course, I should be able to write that shit off. Over all of the billions of dollars going into drugs of questionable, of questionable effectiveness. And it's not questionable effectiveness.

But it is for the people it's assigned for. Bro, hold on, hold on, Sean. Do you know how these studies get done? Do you know how these double blinds get done? Where they pay for a smorgasborg of double blinds and they cherry pick the ones to feed to the FDA? It's completely fucked. Not all, not all of them are not all. Yeah. Not all, not all, not all. Of course, they're antibiotics work. You know, of course, vaccines don't work. They give you autism.

I mean, of course, of course they give you autism. Insurance will cover my autism. They won't cover my Plotty's clip. All right. The last one was a joke. But I think what I mean though, yeah, I do. But I think you're thinking, you have to realize that these are worldwide. Yeah.

It's very easy to get into the American centric. Oh, well, we pay off this system. Yeah, we pay off the FDA or we chair like whatever. Other countries like the World Health Organization, these different FDA's and all these other countries are doing it as well. All I'm going to say this is this, when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. That's what's happening. What's happening is people come in.

That's what I think too. I guess it's feeling like I want to pill for it. That's a self-feeding system that they're like, here's doctors like mechanics, meaning half of them are fucked. And what the fuck they're doing. And they're like, who gave me a steak dinner last? No, and to that point, their time is shrunk as well. Yes. So it's like, yeah, I don't, when I go in, we spend time. Yeah. First of all, why do you even go to,

well, I don't know why you go to the doctor. I only go to the doctor because my wife wants to know my number. I'm talking about, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, oh, I'm talking about, I'm talking about, oh, okay, okay. I'm talking about that stuff. Yeah.

You should have your fucking mouth out. Obviously, you're wearing a sweat suit. I'm wearing a, yeah. You should your fucking mouth out. That's on your last night. I'm wearing a truck suit. You're wearing a sweat suit. That's how we know you need to go to the doctor. Here's another thing. Cause I work out all the time. I need to wear a sweat suit.

Here's another thing that I didn't mention. That's, that's, that's, that's, go ahead. These, these drugs are their own built-in reason to get away from them. Yeah, because, because they always have some kind of side effects. What you try to do is you get the one that, and here's the thing, different ones. There's note it is a crap shoot on which one or one's work on you. Some of them, it's like, Paxil doesn't work on it.

You find effects or works. There isn't any rhyme or reason, but they all cause side effects and you go, man, I would love to not have these side effects. So they're their own, you don't get, you don't get all the positive without any negative. So you're like, fuck, I'd love to get off these. I can't wait to not take these anymore. And you end up going, it's a little bit of a net gain. I hate the side effects. I hate the side effects.

It's still better than not. And that's what's, you know what I mean? So it's not like, God, everything's great. I, you know, does that make sense? I'm just saying I want my money. I want my money too. Everybody gets money for their drugs. I'm going to fucking, I can't write off my wild turkey purchases

with insurance. I can't write off my fucking yoga pants. The exercise thing? Yeah, I want my fucking money. That's my point. Let me ask you a quick question. Do you think that mental health has been pretty much the number of people that suffer from certain issues is about the same throughout history. And we just like diagnosis more, diagnosis more,

and we come up with, like meaning, meaning I'm sure people have been dealing with this for, oh, I believe so, yeah. So, and you think it's a net gain, and we just, and it's just a negative effect or amplify. People aren't working out now, though. They're so, right. Well, you used to, yeah, you're last,

you're, let's get sedentary in the face. Let's get Larry on here before we kill ourselves. Wow. Larry, what's up? What's up, man? Hey, how are you? Hey, how are you? How are you? How are you?

Thank you for calling into congratulate me on my five years success to us and pot leadership and eviscerating my enemies. Always be a single podcast. Thank you. Nice. Thank you. Nice. Thank you. How have you been, sir? What makes you a rage?

Do you have any announcements to make for an assesment? I have announcements. Okay. What is it? You've got five years of history here and then I guess two and a half that since I sort of sort of fooling around with you. And I'm sure a lot of people may remember the great Will you punch me

Cliff Fuffle yeah, I said I said that I would punch Larry in the face right according to George Yeah, I just want to come out and say that I did say that Yeah It's just so funny because it's something you were just not safe and and then people you recall sort of said there should be like, you know, we should do get out, which was kind of silly. Um, but well silly because you know I'd kick your ass. That's what we're going. Yeah.

Okay. Because last week I posted a picture at a card show and one of them happened to include myself. Yeah. Some guy said, Hey Larry, your guns look bigger than Dix. Okay, I should arm wrestle. Have everything is a fucking contest. What about road rage Vegas?

You want to get on that? That's not a bad idea. That's not a bad idea. So I'm down for you. Larry, let me tell you a little something about arm wrestling. Not only have I, not only have I beat a prison arm wrestling champion, I have, I have arm wrestled meth heads. I'm the guy at a party who will arm wrestle anyone at any time.

Well, last time I arm wrestled someone, I threw and threw a wall. It was so definitive. I will absolutely fucking destroy you at arm wrestling. You see that I won't even fight dirty and I know how. I will, I'm gonna not kill the over to the top. I won't even curl over to the top. When I arm wrestle, I see in slow motion like that movie with Angelina Jolie, where they're shooting bullets that each other and spinning them around.

I am. Can you be Angelina? Yes. I am probably the greatest podcasting arm wrestler on earth. I will destroy you with arm wrestling. That is what I'm telling you right now. We can have a weigh-in. Are we doing this in Vegas?

That's what you're saying. Oh, yeah. There should be a betting line. There should be wadering. There should be a prize. Maybe give it a charity or the fuck knows. No, give it to me. There's all will be the winner. I'll figure out, I'll figure out what charity that I want to give it to. Are you an arm wrestler? Yeah. That was not a consequence. What's your experience arm wrestling? Uh, snap to do. What have been? What have been? How many methods have you beat? Uh, usually they, I just snapped their fucking, I crushed their hands as soon as we square off.

When's the last time? Tell us some arm wrestling stories. What do you guys? What do you guys? I used to, when I tented Barnes, joint and queens, I was a champion for a while. Then some ringer came in from the Bronx. It's like, he looked like a fucking beer truck. And he finally beat me.

But I was a lot smaller than younger. And now you've got wisdom. I've got wisdom and guile and experience. Let me see those, let me see those guns. Let me see that picture. Shit, let me see if I can pull it in here. Hang on. Excuse me. Uh, I don't know where that is.

Let's see where this is. Try all I do is arms. Yeah, all I do is arms. Yeah, all I do is arms. Yeah, there's no possible way. Yeah, there's no possible way. Why have you been hiding this all these years? You never said this before. Did you?

What, did I exercise my arms primarily? I think everybody knows. I mean, I know you, I know you work out, that's clear. If you never said anything about arm wrestling. I don't like to brag. I'm a pretty humble guy. Here it is.

Yeah. Here it is. That's the funniest thing ever said on this podcast. That's right. There. Okay. All right. This is Larry.

This is Larry next to Ecto one showing his guns off. Yeah, that's just good fore arms. Yeah, you got some good forearm. Yeah, look at that. Yeah. Um, okay, you're on, Larry. Let's do it. I'll see you in Vegas, buddy. See you in Vegas. You better be fucking ready. Yeah. What makes you rage? When I get on this fucking discord and I can't hear anything until two minutes before, well, I'm on. I was trying to work in where the fucking, where I could say the link had expired. Oh, yeah.

Sorry, Larry. You stopped the show. That's all right. That's all right. Yeah. What's going on in your show lately? Show. It was great.

What's going on? I've been going off on everything. A lot more, a lot more a rant than I used to do, but there was good reason. Yeah, since we got AOC and you know, Nate learned these guys is a lot to shoot at. All right, well, you want to plug it? Sure. Yeah, that's right. Show.com. That's a take no shit tojo. All right. Thank you, Larry. Here's two and other five years. That's where I learned that one. Hey, what the fuck was in that bag of chips? We started with the game. I was like, I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm where I learned it. That's what I learned that one. Hey, what the fuck was in that bag of chips? We still haven't opened the fuck it. They've been waiting for you. Okay, bring it to cause of actions. You can't see them anymore. I told you years ago. Bring it to Vegas and we'll open it in Vegas. I'll take a loser has to beat that weird poop chick. That's a good major. Whatever that is. All right. I'll see you later. You better start putting some cortisol and those fucking tendons because I'm going to rip

them right out of your eye. Good luck, Rick. Good luck. Good luck. See you. All right. I'm going to start beating off with my right hand now just to prepare. Get that fucking mask you're looking at. Get that dealt worked out. Let's get FIGBAT. Are there any chicks in this

episode? No. Put on your Snapchat filter. FIGBAT. What's going on, buddy? Hello, gentlemen. What's up, FIGBAT? What makes you rage, buddy? What do you want to tell me about? What makes me a rage? You know what makes me a rage? The world fucking series of dice makes me a rage. The world fucking series of dice makes me a rage. The reason the world series of dice makes me a rage is I got I broke into Warhammer 4k today for the first ever time. Okay. So I they told me we've got this fantastic new version of the game. I don't even know how to play the original game. Just let me throw some dice and let me win some shit. Let me go home and fuck some bitches. Unfortunately, I didn't win.

And I did a little thing called kill team. And essentially it's like a small squad scale. I want great for noobies, amazing stuff. The only one problem is, I can't influence dies the same way I can influence women. And that's what the problem is. What do you think about war hammer 40k? Is that like Dungeons and Dragons?

Like you're running a, like you got a bunch of figurines on a tabletop and you're rolling dice and they fight like chess. Pretty much. Yeah, except all the figurines are expertly painted by the world's top artists. Oh yeah. What you have are just dark blue dudes

who have just been sprayed in one color because nobody gave a fuck about your rag tag as army. But they just gave it to you at the last minute starting team in any form of fucking, how can I say this like a pay to win simulator? Okay. So I would say getting introduced and thrown in at the deep and is very difficult but it was very fucking fun and I would heartily suggest 40k to anyone who hasn't already tried it. I've never seen you rolling dice would be good.

But nobody came to rub us, so it was amazing. All right. I was expecting some of the coming and shooting the place up, but it was on the in a game's workshop. So I want to just have one of the documented to know that it was in Jenkins. For Hammer 40k, there you go. No, Rodney Wilson Jenkins. Sure. Or Hammer 40K. There you go.

Looks like an expensive hobby. It is a very expensive hobby. I nearly sold my shirt, but it was a hair to dick show logo on it, so I just went to the pub and drank until I couldn't feel feelings. Oh, you can drink while you play this game, okay? I'm in. Of course. Drinking is entirely part of the fun and making up fancy little names.

I've pretty much named most of my squad after all of you guys. Of course. Drinking is entirely part of the fun and making up fancy little names like I've pretty much named most of my squad after all of you guys problem is is you're all kind of fucking dead Well, kind of what kind of dead. Oh, yeah, well, that's yeah, some of you died herotally some of you died like bitches One of you's charge somebody it was amazing. It was like it had everything that a modern battle has and it also ended with a show down between two leaders I will document and post accordingly. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Um, all right buddy. Think about what's your opinion of Idris Elba? I think he's bitch and I think he's tall and I think he's what a lot of white women like but never really can handle when we start beating Around afterwards in a boat. I love you. Coach, what's your, what's your pin of John Candy?

I love him. He's like, I think that you're out of here. Thank you very much for five years, mate. Yes, it was very much. You had to suffer a couple with my looks, but it's pretty much been like jail man 60 months 260 weeks one 1825 days 43,000 817 hours 2.6 million motherfucking minutes Wow, so it's a rain man to wow, it has been a lot of really rain man. It's more prison that does that

or just calculators before the show. It also does that. Now, it's just, prison's better because we get to throw the soap over here. Have you been to prison over there? I only visit in, you know, it's conjugal physics are interesting. Think about, if you had your baby mama on the couch, and I never mind, never mind.

What do you mean, pre-opposed baby mama, because it depends on whether it's one that I've left in a dust or one that I'm going to create. Because the kids are going to have to find me. Like fuck that shit. I might not them around, but the kids are going to have to find me. But we've just banned the biggest DNA test TV show as well.

So it's made even easier for me to get away. They don't love the English memory postage. Yeah. It's bigger. It's easier for him to get away. Think about it. Are you in the UK? Yeah. I am in the UK and I'm trying to get away. It's a popular belief of everyone in the Dixiel Facebook group.

Why actually am black? Everyone seems to think I'm some based working. That would be hilarious. But so you guys got the surveillance going on. Facial recognition. Oh, yeah. We have facial recognition, but we've had it for years. It's only really been in its early stages.

I've had a few friends that have been bothered by facial recognition, but funny enough, they're not all black. I'm really hoping connect races and really helps me if I ever get into any actual trouble. That's what I was going to say. I don't think it works on black people. Right. We talk about the big works on black people.

You can just say the same things that we've had over the years. I'm trying to about the big works on Black people. We see the companies that we have. I'm trying to make this go on. There are some things that we just cannot control. And unfortunately, after 400 years of flames, we've also found that you cannot control either. All right. Computers can't control Black people. Wait, wait, your answers just... No, no, slaves.

I don't know, like, to be fair, like, I was gonna go onto ancestry.com, but my family's from Bermuda and St. Kitts. So either way, either they originated on an island where there was lots of sun, or they were just taken from a continent to put on an island. I don't wanna go back in time

and find out and relate to that. You also allow for the possibility that they build the ship and sailed over there? That, alright, alright. It's entirely possible, but I've also seen the movie Armistad and it never happened like that. Hey, I've seen the Titanic though, so I've seen most of the most of the ships that leave here usually in the fucked up. And that's okay. All right, goodbye, Fig bed. Thank you. I thank you for coming. Thank you for coming. Thank you for coming.

Yeah. I love everything that Fig bed. Yeah. Fig bed is so funny. I wish he had his own podcast. I would just listen to him all the time. Yeah, just him talking about like fucking, I don't know if I'm bread at the store. I'd be amusing. I think. I think the health stuff, the candy stones, the old vacation of the fat Nigerian nurse was like,

I almost crashed my car with my vest. I know. I think we've got, I think we've got Gator and Ralph. Let me see if I've got both of these gentlemen on here. I really hope we do. Gator and Ralph, are you guys there? Dick Masterson. How's it going, man?

Yes, how's it going? Oh my God. Ralph, you're getting sued. How does it feel? You're congrats, then. Yeah, I saw you tweet a little bit about it. One of Stargon staffers who apparently is actually not even a member of U-Kip and said he was going to vote for Nigel's party instead.

Yeah. Threatened to sue me on StarGon's behalf on Twitter today. Over my very tasteful rape t-shirt, I have to say, a nice, start-or-y old choice for the summer if you're looking for new stuff. Hey, tell them to sue you in LA. We'll have fun. Yeah. I can confirm that the person does work for Sargon at all because I thought it was a troll when I first saw it.

I thought it was a troll too, because if you look at the avatar, he's got the Snapchat filter that turns them into a chick. Yeah. And he's just a real weirdo. Works for Connie. Now, it's apparently, it's apparently actually his staffer because he's love tweeting photos from Sargon's little meetup and and dank the fall. Some and some other people follow him. So well that's incredible.

Real staffer. Yeah. I love your I love your response of oh I thought I thought we were bringing jokes back to the UK. I thought. I'm sorry. So Ralph made a Sargon shirt and said it was from the official campaign where it's a picture of Sargon that just says rape under it. Like Obama is so. Because, you know, because I have to explain jokes to everybody now. The joke is that his campaign has turned into that rape guy, like that N word guy. Every single time he's on TV. So why did you say this about rape? What

do you think about rape? And Sargon, Sargon on TV, claimed that he has, that he's, he's allowed to talk about this because he himself was almost raped. Yeah. He was sexually assaulted then. I think it was yesterday or day before some old woman was in his face, screaming at women particularly earlier. Almost right. About about the stuff. Yeah, almost.

Yeah, he said, my wife was raped. He started screaming in his wife and then raped. Wow. Can you imagine this? That's not good for anything. And my best friends have been raped. Some of my best friends have been raised. Yeah, but no, but the worst branding about that

is that Sargon has already gone on and said, I wouldn't even rape you. So people are associating him with the rapist and we said, oh yeah, my wife got raped. It's, yeah. He's saying that he raped his wife. That's what people hear. Well, he was on the BBC yesterday or day before

and after he left literally the first comment after he left They were reading like viewer responses or whatever Every time she was reading a comment, you know every time I hear this man's voice I'm going to leave this. I'm going to go to the Blade God. Every time I think. It is mad. It's the Randy Marsh. This is terrible.

You keep his dead. Brexit is never going to happen. That's the second referendum. So I don't kill it. never gonna happen. That's their, my God. They're gonna have a second referendum. And it is. So Argonne killed it. Fucking, our boy, Dan Kula is never gonna hold office because he's too closely associated with the Sargon now. Oh, it's too bad.

Yeah. Thank you, look. It could have been better. He's Sargonne too in every way. He's, because he understands jokes. I don't think Sargonne understands jokes. Yeah, you're right. I don't think he does, because he's saying,

this is a meta joke. It's like, no, dude, this is not a deconstructive for me so that it's a joke because it's not funny. I didn't believe you. I have to explain how it was attempted to be funny. I didn't believe you when you first started saying that. Yeah, I believe 100% now. He's absolutely in the, he's like pantomiming jokes.

Oh, this is a joke. This is a joke. I am joke robot 3000 rape rape. He needs that guy. I did the chicken pro load. He needs that. You raped. He needs that family guy.

Foreign guy to go, oh, it's funny because blank. Like fill in the fucking blank, you idiot. Yeah, he's just hired a dane. It's funny because people like me last time. I can talk polish it around so people know when to laugh. Well, you must be happy about it, Ralph. I know you and Sargon have had a beef going a long time. Well, there's been so much Sargon news lately. I've actually got a few people like, Oh, Ralph, come on. You just don't like this guy. Why are you?

Why you keep talking? It's literally every single day, there's a huge story in the news, either he's getting a viscerate on the BBC or they kicked him out of it. They wouldn't let him go to a cathedral or something. Yes, they should have for debate and all the other candidates refuse to show up, but they didn't want to be on stage for them. It's him. It's him. This guy, he's so, Sargon shows up to like an open panel debate or whatever with so-said other candidates. And everybody else bailed because they didn't want to be

associated with him in the crowd. He's a fart in an elevator. So it's, go ahead. Go ahead, Gator. Oh, Tion, go ahead. No, no, his fault, his problem is that he didn't take that as, okay, this is my press conference now. I'm just gonna say whatever I want right like he should have totally trumped it and got all the attention on him and later Everything that he was gonna do and shown hey, I'm not this crazy fucking rapist

You people being groomers who has a dumb YouTube channel. He should have been like all right Here's what we're gonna do. Here's why Brexit is good. Here's why you keep us right Here's why we need to cut that immigration or whatever his life for is. I don't even fucking know, but I know it's not right. And the rest of these people don't even have enough respect for you to come here and talk. Exactly.

My unworthy opponents did not show up because they think that you're too dumb to realize the difference. That's right. Have you had him on the show? Yeah, he called in. And I said, why did you call medical a pedophile? Yeah.

And he said, well, groomer means many things. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I guess so does molesting. If I say I was molested, I'm not talking about getting a massage. Like, right. It's a crime to get you an out of the way.

Not you off your stance or something. That's not, I don't know. Yeah. I'm tired of feel sorry for the guy. I mean, technically, my last thing could mean anything, you know, somebody bumped into you or whatever, right, but it's clear. He tried to smear Jim as a pet. I'm he tried to blame me for getting him kicked off Patreon.

There's a lot of things this guy's done over the last few months where normally, even if it wasn't, you know, somebody I didn't like, I would still feel bad, a little bad because he's getting absolutely destroyed. He is getting destroyed. But it hasn't taken any advice. No. I mean, that's part of the, like, that's a two-way street. I will not celebrate in your failures and humiliations if you are able to take advice. If you're not taking it, like, at some point, you kind of, you become a cancer.

That's why I're the pros. Yeah. You have to take it. At some point, if you're not gonna, if you're not gonna, if you're not gonna help us, if you're on our side and you're making things worse for us, you gotta just go away, man. We gotta put you down.

We gotta, we have to put you down. Yeah. Because you keep talking. You're, you fuck things up for Daniela so badly like. All right. because he's talking you can you fuck things up for dancola so badly like all right i think how to make you look should have every bit of press every day sargon should not even exist because he does such a terrible job of explaining his position he answers every criticism with a question which is so sarcastic and stupid it cannot it cannot be understated how much damage he's doing

to to not only their political party but the concept of free speech like he's so terrible it will lose anything is point you're the worst representative for this cause the worst man the so what i'm saying this as uh... the only thing worse than a bad defender is a worse proponent. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it wasn't, uh, Dankula, didn't he get started, kind of with Sargon or whatever or

how did that go down? Or they kind of, like, in a friendly, just coming up, you know, the same crowd or whatever. Dankula did the Nazi pug video. Sure. I don't know if he was friends with Sargon at that time. Not really familiar with his pug videos. What do you mean you started this blog? Yeah, with a pug video, it's one of the most classic things

I've ever seen. Yeah, let me do. Yeah, I still watch that bus stop laugh and that's one of the best videos ever. Yeah. The best part is he did it just to take off his girlfriend. Yeah. That's his name.

I mean, that's his name. Daniela, Daniela is able to be understood by every man on the planet. Here, 10 comedy. Why did you do this? To piss off my girlfriend, say no more. Right. Yeah.

Okay, how bad was the rape joke, tell me? It's a pretty skilled, too, right? Like he can talk to anybody. He's been on our show even after we've had, you know, obviously some issues with Sargon. He's just able to come across with well with anybody. And Sargon, so he's introducing himself as his free speech activist. And then, okay, well, what's your big thing?

Well, I, you know, I tweeted a rape comment towards the MP like that's his big issue. It's not a great selling point. No, it's not. He gets asked by a BBC person. It's like, well, do you think that speech is violence? And he starts, I says, yes. Right. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

You've given up. I'm incredible. It doesn't matter what's after the butt. He's a plan. Yeah. He walked him into that. He was. He was.

He was. Well, what makes you guys a rage? Let me start there. It's great to hear from both of you. I wish Zidane could be. Is he in there? Let me see. He's not in there.

By the way, while you're thinking about that, this bomb looks like something the Unibrow would make. He stapled the bottom. Yeah. So you wouldn't open the wrong side. Well, he probably bought that from somewhere. No. Glitter bomb.

What makes you guys a rage? I, ho, ho, ho, ho. I'll let Gator go first. I think I have one, but I've got a good one. So I was actually going to hop on here earlier, but I had a 45 minute wait for a freaking haircut. It's like everybody decided today was the day to get a haircut. And then when I went to the frickin' sport clips, I didn't realize you had to sign into the kiosk because apparently that's a new thing.

So like four or five people walked up, then I finally woke up and realized, oh yeah, you got to sign into the kiosk now, okay. Oh, that's a rage. And you're right. I'd kill someone. One, I was going to get hair to tape it too. I never go to any of those fucking places. If I go to a barber shop and I always test them

whenever I get a new barber, hey, what do you hate about your wife? If they can't give me a good, funny answer, I never go back. Even if the haircut is great because I don't. That's an odd test. It is not a test. I know, but that's the kind of thing.

Like, the bars I go to, I think some barbers are living their lives satirically. And I hate things like that. I know you not let it hurt worse ideas. When satirically. And I hear things like that. You not let it hurt worse ideas. Would you not let a single guy cut your hair? Do they have to have a wedding ring? I mean, then you're like, you know,

say never have your mom. I've never had a guy under 40 cut my hair. It's always been older men. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, that's getting taken out of. I had a fantastic Sam. Ralph, how's the, are you still doing the no drinking thing? I have been, yeah, for what?

I guess about five weeks or so now. How's that going? Is it an experiment or do you really not want to drink? Well, I don't know if I'm going to go for the whole rest of my life, but I'm looking at a solid period. I was kind of a, maybe over over sampling, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah, over serving yourself. Yeah, over served.

That was over served. So yeah, it's been going pretty good. My rage would have to be Joe fucking Bernstein who kicked up a goddamn fucking horn. It's nest again with soap. Got the archive channels taken down, which I don't know if your audience is familiar, but what archive channels? What's Joe Bernstein? No, Joe Bernstein. he writes for Buzzfeed. He got it into it. Right. He attacked like a 14 year old girl. He attacked Solve who's been on this program. But he's a blockhead. I know exactly. Joe Bernstein is a blockhead. Joe Bernstein watched the Sam Hyde video where Joe Bernstein. Yes. Let's, well, I'm going to put it on.

I really, so put it on. It's so funny. It's so funny. It's so funny. It's so funny. The best. He, he really is hilarious. That was, I watched that video probably more than any of the video ever. Can we eat the crocodile jerky? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Open it up.

Yeah, open it up. Open it up. Open it up. Okay. Uh, Ralph, what were you going to say about Joe boxing? Keep going while I find this video. I was back on YouTube streaming on my channel. I got my channel's got deleted back in the fall. So it's kind of using a loophole to get on there.

Yeah. Well, he wrote this article about so, so has been on my show. I don't know, three or four times this year. So people started looking hard at some of the archives that were hosting our show. They took down the archives. I see. I had to go back to D-Live. Although to D-Live's credit, they haven't really messed with the show since we've been over there. I saw Josh from Kimmy Farms. It's also streaming over there. So they've been a little bit better, but it kind of fucked up the streaming spot.

Fucked with sooth. The police were involved with this. The police were involved now. Sooth lives in the United States. What do you mean the police were involved? Yeah. The police were involved now. So it lives in the United States. What do you mean the police were involved? Yeah, well, I have to hold on. Let me find, let me see if I can find the article, but she was on the show and she talked about it a little bit last night.

She said she had spoken with the police and they're, let me see if I can find it. You gotta find a short clip. First off, they're, they're, you know, conversing with the school, but they also have to keep her safe. Apparently, I guess maybe there's been some death threats or something like that. Yeah, of course. Of course. Here's the quote from the school. So Joe Bernstein is the guy who ruined. He's the one who wrote this so far article. He ruined Sam Hyde's show, million dollar

extreme by writing this hit piece on how Sam Hyde is, you know, race this blah, blah, blah, blah, and he hit imagery in his show, like total nonsense, but it is, I think it's to blame for the cancellation of world peace. Well, it certainly wasn't the ratings because the ratings for the killment. Yeah. So he's now, so who's called into the show is a 14 year old girl who does videos that are, I would, you know, I guess you would describe them as red-pilled, but they're not political, they're not necessarily political, they're culture-based.

So she's talking about like why women are fucked, why school is fucked, like how so many people are obsessed with how they don't address the core of your argument, they address how it makes you look. And she's incredibly well spoken and able to deliver her points. So Joe Bernstein, he, he, it was the funniest article. He writes about self, but he uses, he uses Joe Bernstein uses a clip, a screenshot of Sof's video, but blurs out her face, and then writes a gigantic article on how she's a racist.

It's like, why did you, she's in her video wearing a hijab. Anyway, I'm gonna try to find Sam Hyde's. You gotta talk about her, like, she'm going to try to find Sam hides. You got to talk about her. Like she's some kind of Nazi. She's not even a even white nationalist, I wouldn't even call much less a Nazi. Well, this gets a cap kind of, you know, lull, I don't know, lull, but Terry might be insulting libertarian, yeah, extreme libertarian type.

Lull, libertarian, yeah, lull, libertarian. I mean, it's just a complete horses. She's not, she doesn't even have that, that edge really. No, trying to put a label on someone already you're losing again, you know, who's using LA based comedian. Me, that's, that's, that's you. That's your Twitter. I don't have a private Twitter. I'm still looking for this same hide. Oh, also, this is from the school, by the way, they sent out the emails to parents. I want to assure all of our students and parents that we are aware of the situation and we are working with local law enforcement to

ensure the safety of all students and staff to those of you who have written or called. Thank you for sharing your concerns with us. Okay. So Joe Bernstein called up Sam Hyde to try and get a quote for his article that he was right. I know. Here's to this is a short clip of Sam Hyde's response, of his phone call, because Sam recorded it on his own. Yeah, and this is like 15 minutes, by the way, so watch the full one is like 10 minutes long. And I'm just playing my favorite part.

Okay. And Sam's favorite part. Everyone's favorite part. I want to be totally straight forward with you. You will, you will never, in a million years, get a job at a publication as prestigious as the New York Times. That little pipe dream is never going to happen. You will be blogging and tweeting until you are dead and nobody will care. Nobody will ever read anything you wrote

and say to themselves, this is important! Nobody's ever gonna read a page that you wrote and say to themselves, damn I'm glad I read that. They're just, it's just fucking popcorn. You write the mental equivalent of popcorn, and you will never get a job at the New York Times. They'll look at your resume and they'll go, hmmm, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm not using that gun to work out. One more thing. Hey, you're a kid. Your parents called you dumb. They probably called you a blockhead. Because you're a blockhead, you're a big attention school general. I'm not using that. I can't hear you because you're screaming very loud. Can you hear me? Sam Hides should be a billionaire. He's so fucking.

Now he wants a TV show, but with that classic video there, I don't even know, thousands of fans probably gain, maybe even hundreds of thousands. I support him on Gumroad. Everybody should. He's got his, is like a Patreon thing over there in Gumroad. Soaps on new project too, by the way. Oh my God, Ralph, I gotta get you in.

But I talked to Richard Spencer Soaps on new project too, by the way. Oh my God, Ralph, I gotta get you in. I talked to Richard Spencer about getting on new project too. Yeah, you know what? They had mentioned something about trying to reach out to you, but it was a wall back. I didn't know if they ever did. So yeah, I had a phone call with him yesterday about getting on because as far as I'm concerned,

like all the hate speech or whatever political ideology you have, you have an absolute fundamental right to participate in commerce and that is more important, that is as important as life itself. And everyone should be behind that. Like it's more, the freedom of, freedom to interact in commerce is more important than freedom of speech by orders of magnitude to me because it's literally the abstraction of your life. I know I'll take shit. I know that I will take shit from people for hosting him, but we've got, there is no point

in having the platform if it cannot support people like that. Absolutely. And I will try to do it until I'm explicitly told by the bank that I can't. And we'll see what happens. It'll be interesting. Well, I think that's a good pause. He'll definitely, I mean, look, you know, as well as I do, that he will be turned up with him on there. But like you said, if you're doing the project, you're doing the project, right? So yeah. Yeah. Anyway, it's not too late for you, Sartaron. You can still call in Dick Setty would make a poll.

Ben the knee. Yeah. Now you want to make him apologize, you said? Oh, no, I don't need, I don't need an apology. I don't need an apology. I don't need an apology. You know, the whole apologize thing too. I don't know what you guys think, but it's, I feel like it's based in this weird macho

power trip where guys are beating their chest and we're like never apologize, never apologize. Well, yeah, okay, but, you know, accomplish your goals first, though. Right. Don't do stupid things to not get you the results you want. Hey, I'll give you a million dollars of you apologize. Okay, apologize. Yeah.

Well, you put yourself in a position where you have to apologize as much, you know, if you're, if you're doing your shit, your powerful enough, you got enough backing. But if it's just a throwaway of polity, you know, you don't mean it. And it's going to advance your goals. Anyways, just do it. Like I don't think like the measure of a man is more about being resourceful, like using the resources you have to get more out of, get more out of life. That seems to be a bigger measure of a man than just blindly following rules, not apologizing. Right. I personally would like to apologize

for kidnapping the Lindbergh baby, for instance. Yeah. All right. Oh yeah. Okay. Let me get Zadan in here. I'm gonna send him a link, which I just want to have the whole team,

the whole band back together for a minute. By the way, five years in podcasting you guys. That's quite an achievement, sir. How long have you guys been doing your show? Well, I've been doing the show for a while, but I've only been, I guess, podcasting regular type shows since maybe last February. So way less time than me. That's for sure.

You, you rode the way that he created. Just blows ours out of the water. I'm but a baby compared to Dick. Yes. We're all but babes. I'm sending it to Zidane right now. Now someone mentioned, uh, Maddox possibly hopping on here. That'd be great. Oh yeah. I'll eat my own dick if Maddox calls it. What would you say? No, seriously, I was in here thinking, what would Jackson say to Matt? Would you be magnanimous and just chill about it?

Or would you, I mean, I don't think I know what you would do. The way, the way I see it is, Maddox is still today as funny as he was on day one, episode one of the old show to me, for exactly the same reasons. For probably the exact probably the same reasons that Sargon is funny to you. He is I think that he is intellectually disabled in some way emotionally disabled. I think that he is emotionally disabled and slightly more intelligent than the average person and that his childhood

has given him a way, his childhood has not prepared him to cope with life and that I've, I had, I had an infinity of advantages over him when it came to our upbringings. And I was fine trying to help him for so long, but it wasn't until he actively tried to fuck me over that it became this, that it became a rancorist, like, that it became a project, that it became a project to try to destroy, like, exactly, you know, to put him down so that I could survive. Right. And that everyone who relies on me could survive. Like, it became a necessity to me to do that.

I don't even necessarily hold any ill will against him. I think he's fucked. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's always been fucked. I think you summed up pretty well where it came from too. And why, and why you're different and able to deal with it. Yeah. Still to this day, if he wanted to call in and work things out, I would help him try to get back

in the good graces of the world. Yeah, that's what I was asking. If he actually was serious, are you believed enough of it that where you think he was for real, would you actually kind of try to make peace with him, be cool with him? Yeah.

I would pay him for to do a bonus episode every month. I mean, I'm not going to, I'm not going to be his best friend, but there is, you know, there is something, there's something wrong with him. He has a lot to answer for. You won't be vacationing into the Hamptons together or anything like that. Oh, no. The pencil and the Patreon. Yeah, it depends on, we'll be on Fire Island.

I'll be drilling him up the ass. Does he have to drink any toilet water or something? He's got to make himself, that's making us. That was my deal with Maddo. If Maddox makes himself throw up every day on camera, I'll pay his rent. I'll pay his rent. That's a good extra.

I would do that. I would do that. I would do that. I would do that. You I do that. Not you. No, you're not especially able. If Maddox makes me go ahead. Oh, just go say I see Zadan in the oh, let me get him in here. Zadan. Look at this. Oh my God. The crew's all back together. Welcome to the programs. Hey, what's up? How are you? Zadan, man, the boot and knees butcher. Holy fuck, I missed this trio. This is the entire round for tour at the time the show right now. Wow. Yeah, Z man, the boot and ease butcher, holy fuck, I missed this trio. This is the entire round for Torrent that's on the show right now. Wow. Yeah. So Dan, what makes you a

rage? But I'm just talking about Maddox and how magnanimous and I am and how I would welcome him back into a world that he doesn't understand and open fists with open fists. Close open fists slapping. And I would and I, because, because I'm the only one who knows how to monetize his disability. And this is true. Historically, I'm the only one who could monetize his crazy ass. That is true, but if you look at him, he's not doing so hot. He's not doing so hot.

None of his podcasts are doing well. What is the last one he's tried to do? A Godzilla one. Godzilla versus podcast. Yes. I don't know the whole story on this. What exactly is the next? May interrupt very quickly.

Go ahead. What do you want to do? Maddox, I know you listen, or at least I know that you used to be a patriotic because there's no way that you had the information in the lawsuit without being a patriotic. Right. I also know that you owe a stereo $290. I have $300 in my wallet right now.

If you call into this program while we're live, I will drive to Hollywood when we're done and give you $300 cash, please do it right now. This is in the interest of the olive branch and in humor and in comedy. Go ahead. You have probably another four and a half hours. That's not happening.

That's not happening. You have a very good, like, phone bank type of donation voice. Yeah. Coach, I want to come over here. I try to give people to give me money all the time. That's my job. Salesman. Uh, what were you saying, sedan?

Staying in rough here. No, you didn't interrupt. We were just talking about his dumbass podcasts. Like he's trying to do it. Oh, yeah. Godzilla versus podcast zero. That's the name of it? Yeah.

That's his attempt. Oh, that's his attempt to bang his co-host. Yeah. Again? Yes. This is all the time. We were the first. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. This is all this guy does is make podcasts with Chick so he can try to bang them. Is that his entire MO? That's the only reason any guys do improv comedy. Truth. Oh really? Yeah, they just want to bang the broken souls that wander in there who have teds. She's not exactly that stumpsuous, I don't think.

No, and she's, well, it's Maddo. I don't think. No, it's mad. She's got to get what he can get. She's 38 too. I found my god, something like that. 37 for all the things I could fall to for. Can't fall to for that one. Mm hmm. For trying to fuck a 38 year old woman, you can't well fuck anything. Um, Zidane, what makes you rage, buddy? Oh, what makes me rage? Yeah. Fucking right now. I, oh, right now it's all the Democrats are running. I have been reading and paying attention way too much on what is it? 25 of these fuckers all running at once.

Who's the last one? The mayor of New York, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the butcher of groundhogs, the, the, the butcher of groundhogs, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, theio the butcher of groundhogs the blasio himself is running. You saw that story. Is he? I killed it. Yeah, we're about six feet in a Maui. Did he kill it? They had a fucking conspiracy to cover up. Wait until he did. Wait, the blasio killed a groundhog. He killed a ton of people on his head and it died.

I just read this this morning. That's just right. This morning, that was a, that was a, that was a mob sanctioned hit. The groundhog knew too much for weeks of, yeah. Yeah, the, the Democrats feel looks really, it looks like a Batman villain, uh, Rogues gallery, like there's dozens of them. Calendar man is coming out.

$1,000 man is coming. It's crazy. It's not an everywhere. I'm not a part of it. And they keep coming. Oh God. It doesn't stop no-name people. What is this, this butt?

Butt-a-game. Butt-a-game. Butt-a-game. Yeah, whatever. He's not a bad shit. He was in Chicago talking shit Biden was in Philly talking shit Elizabeth Warren just trying to talk to you. So what Elizabeth Warren did is no one wants to see her at all like one person. So she went to a college during graduation and the way that

they counted the people was everyone who walked by to buy food because they were by the food court, they counted. So until like the 200 people are standing there, they're like, they're like, they're thousands of people. I'm like, no, the food court, I'm trying to get away there in the way that. Yeah, yeah. But they put them on wigs and mustaches and make them walk by. You know, speaking of graduations this year, it is going to be, we're going to have live people hanging themselves during their graduation

because just imagine it, every single graduation from college in high school this year is gonna have someone talking about how they're illegal. It's gonna be like 10 minutes of me, Abuela has always been my biggest support and it wouldn't we are not illegal. I am an undocumented like with all that sassy fire of someone who has absolutely nothing to feel like dreamer. If you can just imagine the dream speeches that are going to be going on in graduations this year. Which is why I don't know if you saw it. C.J. Pearson

recently retweeted some guy saying, I wonder what these trump towards would think of my undocumented ass with my 4.0 GPA and full ride to Stanford. Yeah, I retweeted it. Yes, I saw that. I added these jokes. All right, boys, thank you for calling in. Thank you for wishing me five years of podcasting. Don't make all the mistakes that I've made. I don't know what they were. Make more, make

more of the housewarski doing by the way they did. How is anyone? How's Worski doing? Congratulations, man. They don't want to thank you. All right. All right. Five years of many more. Where can they go to find you? Five years, man. Thank you. Thank you. To, to find me deep for the most stable point for now is D.Live.tv slash the Ralfour Tort. And yeah, that's the best play or Twitter. The Ralfour Tort. The Ralfour Tort. All right guys. I see you later. Good luck. Bye bye. Blue car comedy crew. I like that, boys. Yeah. I couldn't tell if that was Ethan Ralphalf Yeah, Ralf what's his face to that one? Browse grade. Yeah, you see he gets along with everybody. No guys under show that I can't get along. He's good nature

Let's see who else we got here. I saw Noah was in here a second ago, but he has Sam Hyde in the show. Yeah, yeah, oh there's Josh There's okay there he is No, no, no, how you doing? Yeah, oh there's Josh. There's okay there is No, no, no, how you doing? Hey, how are you? Why did you not tell me when we were talking on DMs that you were recording in like 30 minutes? Why did you what did you not tell me? He's talking to 80s girl. I'm sorry. Yeah

I apologize I was gonna ask I literally came in here to ask like what time does he record? Because I don't know. I like to punish people who aren't on my Patreon. I like to keep everybody guessing until they subscribe. That's why Ralph had the Patreon list. He had to remind himself of your recording schedule. Yeah.

Thank you for calling in to congratulate me on five years of podcast. Thank you. Well, that's self-evident. You're on the top. You're on the tippy top. It is. I do feel broken in shit, but I do feel like I'm on the top.

Everybody who's dealing with depression should just achieve all of their dreams. Simple. They're not being addicted to pills, just achieve your dreams. You're saying, like, don't make the mistakes I've made, but it's like, make all the mistakes and the world just be funny about it after. You can get away with anything if you're funny about it. Yeah, that's true.

So somebody tells Sargon that. Oh, they're gonna be on it, be on it, be on it, be on it. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, he's awful. Completely humorless. Just be side to the shit that he gets into that causes him to look like an idiot. That's pretty funny.

And the maddox sense, I guess there's a word for that that starts with L and ends with W. You might know what it is, but. What is, starts with L and Cout. Low Cal. It's not L. Yeah. Shit, I don't know what we're talking about.

I never want to be in a position where I need to win an argument by screaming my wife has been raped in public If I ever find myself in that position I will you made a poor series of life choices You never want to start arguing with my wife Yeah Scream that some of my wife was right my wife. yeah, he's arguing with an old woman in the street. And I assume she takes offense to him joking about rape.

And he's rapeseed twice. My wife has been raped. My wife has been raped like, oh buddy, come on. Nobody wants to. Nobody cares. I'm sorry, nobody cares. That's not how you're gonna fix Brexit. I don't know what it's going to be.

You're gonna fix Brexit That was cruise chef's shoe speech he took a shoe off with my wife has been raped When Winston Churchill was facing down Europe being conquered by the Nazis, he just screamed at Hitler. My wife was raped and he was like, fuck it, it's her under, it's her under. You know, I just realized that they say a one in five women have been raped, right? Okay. That's what the feminist stats are.

So that maybe that doesn't, it doesn't hold any water at all anymore. So the two things can't exist. Meaning, if you're like, my wife was raised, it's like, yeah, we know, like 20% of women are raped. Oh, yeah. Next. Well, what else you got?

Well, I just don't think, I think it's an odd thing to say in response to someone. Of course, yeah. I just went off in tangent there. I just realized he's not using a great argument against some people who think that that rape is happening all the time. I'm trying to think of when it would be appropriate to say that. Even if the question was has any of her in here had the wife been raped? I know. That is not something you ever admit. That's that you, if someone suggests that your wife has ever been raped, you kill him. That's the only answer. You don't admit that shit. So how are things in the bad neighborhood of the internet?

Or reflection on you? Yeah. Oh, man. Oh, man. Your streams are great. They're very entertaining. It's so weird because like Ralph gave a lemon. He gave me a lemon and said, oh, hey, Ralph's in the chat and he Ralph gave a lemon. He gave me a lemon and said,

I was like, oh, hey, Ralph's in the chat and he gave you a lemon. And they're like, oh, that's nice. And then he retweeted it. And I was probably going on my rant about 4chan passes. And you're like, oh, this is good. This is yelling and being mad. This is something I got to share with people.

It's weird, because it's like, it's just some shit that I do. And I thought, four jam passes real. I thought they were a joke to get idiots to put their credit card information into a scam site. No, they're very real, but they're, uh, there was a laugh like, I should have a cancel my card. We can't buy, you can't buy them with credit cards.

You've got to buy it with Bitcoin. Oh, no. The banks don't let forechan have credit card payment process. Oh, man. Well, that's you know about that. The banks are just insane. So, I've been, you know, running new project too, which null is on. Yeah. Thank you so much, by the way. That it's doing very well. It it has surpassed my expectations. Great, great. You're feel free to give the URL out if you want to. I don't know if you want to.

It's just mad at the internet.com. I mean, tell myself, I try, no matter where I broadcast, I always upload it to BitShoot because they've been reliable. So it's nice in my hub right now. Null is up there. The some of the de-platformed artists for the show are all up there. Stone costs is up there, which is big up to him because he's he's been thrown off everything. It has been people people went after you because you host them. Yeah, and it's been so so I'm currently in the middle of changing banks

So I'm currently in the middle of changing banks because When I when I started it I was with Chase and this is this is before all of the chase Canceling people's accounts for noise and thank you for naming the name Oh, yeah, yeah, oh, yeah I mean, you know the sad thing is with banks is you can't hurt them You can't know no protest in the world can hurt them even them destroying is you can't hurt them. You can't know, no protest in the world can hurt them, even them destroying their business can't hurt them because the government will bail them out. Right, they're insured.

I mean, also, they'll bail out with your money. Yeah, also, when you told me about Chase, I'm like, well, shit, I got some good cards with points on Chase. I don't know if I'm gonna give those. No, and there's honestly, there's no point. Can't lose my airline. Yeah, exactly. There is no point in protesting them because they cannot lose.

When all the banks went down, the government and the Fed made the decision to dump $2 trillion of qualitative easing into the economy that stole the future of millennials and Gen Z. And it is something that we will grapple with for the next 50 years. And it is, it's why we've got AOC, it's why we've got Trump, it's why we've got this like hyperbolic red, it's why we've got a political environment of hyperbolic red, uh, uh, uh, it's why we've got a political environment of, of, of, of, of, uh, hyperbolic rhetoric because people's futures were destroyed.

The entire recession, the entire recession has been, uh, bailed out by another looming bubble that is manifesting in defaulting auto loans, uh, default, like the idea of college loans will not exist soon enough. So like to say that you're going to protest a bank is just insane. It's standing in front of a steamroller. Yeah, putting your hand in. You're standing in front of a comments. Especially.

The student loans, it's like, you can't bankrupt those student loans. So it's like, okay, I'm a student, and I think you deserve fuck all because my education's worthless. What are you gonna do? You're gonna siphon my income that I'm not gonna work, and I'm gonna collect handouts. And what are you gonna throw me in debtor's prison?

Cause I'm not working and refuse to pay my loans. Come, come, come arrest me for that. And here's the bill you. Here's the bill you're in GOP. You're protesting capitalism. Yeah, yeah, like this. It isn't happening. It's not, it's not, it's not. Motherfucker. You guys, you guys turned, yeah, like this. It isn't happening. It's not in motherfucker.

You guys, you guys turned our money into a game. Yeah. Anyway, so Chase has twice canceled my business account with the ex... The first time they canceled it, they just kill it. They canceled it because they said they couldn't prove it wasn't internet gambling. They didn't have a form that said it wasn't. Yes, they fucking could. That's by looking.

There was, Kean, there was five transactions on it. There was five and they said right away, now it's, you forgot to sign a form that says, yeah, that's internet gambling. That's a good. You guys have every contact number and address. You know, everything about my life, you can, if I turn my phone off, you could probably still call me. Don't tell me that I didn't forget, forgot to sign a fucking form. Yeah, sure. I went back in, go ahead, Josh. I was gonna say it's like the matrix. You just hear the phone ringing outside. Yeah.

So I went, I went back in and did a major, sure, I signed the form again. And of course, this takes like three weeks to get approved because you've got to get a new merchant account of meanwhile, everything's on another, I mean, everything's on a protected account during this time because you know, I expect everything to go wrong all the time. Yes. The second time I go through fully signed form, notarize through the bank manager, it still comes back, canceled. We're sending you a cashier's check for 15 grand or whatever I had in the account because even though

you said we cannot prove it's not internet gambling with they're really leaning on that. Oh yeah. I don't want you. So I go into the bank and I said, look, man, I could do all this again, but it sounds like you want me to go to another bank and the bank manager looked dude, I can't tell you this, but yeah, you're gonna have to go, I don't know why, I've never seen anything like this. I don't know why and I said, yeah, don't worry, I've seen it a lot. Yeah, I know, I've seen it a lot. Did they say the exact same thing at the fucking airport when you try to get your visa?

Like, I've never seen anything like this. I've never seen anything like this. I'm a fucking omega man. Everything only ever happens to me. So I'm moving banks and the new bank, I hope to have a better relationship. But it's fucking wild man. Because I think that they fucked with,

I think that they fucked with those alt-right people because they have like, you know, a checking account, fuck you checking account, fuck you checking account. You fuck you. But I got bigger accounts at this bank. It's a little more like they never give me a smoking gun. I guess is what I'm trying to say. Yeah.

And they never will. Yeah, anyway. I want to interrupt very quickly. Everyone, everyone, every single listener needs to sign up. Be a Patrionia, I want you $10, $20, $1, fuck whatever. I need to make sure that Dick has $5 million at his disposal so that he can open up his own bank, this will never be a problem.

Yeah. Well, it will be a problem. It will be. Then MasterCard's gonna shit down your throat. Yeah. That's true. MasterCard is taking it. Then we'll start our own.dam credit card.

With $5 million, you can do anything. Yeah. Then people'll start on Don Dan credit card. With five million dollars you can do anything. Yeah. Then people can't transfer money to you because then lastly you have the the Dicaroni master card or whatever or whatever you want to name your your credit service. Yeah. Like unless they have that they can't transfer money to you. So it's like even be like I've done a lot of transfers and stuff and even between master card and visa discover at all make up less than 10% of all transactions. It's all MasterCard and Visa card. And MasterCard is basically just saying, look, anti-definitionally, whoever you want, completely shit listed from all payment processes

forever, just let us know. Just let us know. We'll throw them off in a nano so we don't need any justification. Just say that they're a heat group. We'll take your word for it because people trust you and that's it. You took conspiracy theorists are right. Holy shit. Anyway, everyone go donate to fucking Dick's Patreon. I want to have $5 million. Definitely do that. How do you get Bitcoin?

Just, just, just learn it. You don't have to put any money into it. Just learn how to use it because you can't, they can't take that away from you. I'm pretty honest with you. I have like a thousand thousand vehicles. I don't know how to access them. I know where they are. You'll learn. I give both for my nephew has his birthdays tomorrow. I'm going to give him a hundred bucks and big coins. I gave them both a hundred bucks and big coins. That's like giving back in the boomer days they would give you a savings a tea bill for a thousand bucks.

Now we do pick points. Now those are utterly worthless. You can already see the day that they just get to faulted and throw them to the trash. Yeah. Unless you're trying to catch it. Trust me. How is life in the Ukraine? No, Josh.

Comfy. Comfy. Yeah, it's very strange. Nobody knows how to talk to me, so they leave me alone. It's very comfortable. Wow. That sounds great. That's like my paradise. You got to move somewhere where nobody speaks English. I know I know I know a lot of women too. I got a restaurant and I like you know, Bush, Elate, Fajalista. They bring me the bush and the latte. It's like four bucks for the best food you've ever eaten. Do the chicks have huge tits? Am I right in picturing that?

They're all very tall and slender and they have resting bitch face. I love that. I love that. I love that. I understand why Russia wants to invade Ukraine now. I like an angry looking woman, you know, it doesn't matter what country. They all are like, my line of Trump, she's from Slovenia, which is all the way on nearly. But it's all sloppy and they all look the same.

They all that's like my version of 72 versions or whatever it is. It is. It is. It was just a Russian bitch. It's just Ukrainian. If I, if I suicide for the cause of end capistan, you wake up dead and you crane. Yeah. If I did, if I suicide bomb in the name of a libertarian issue, I wake up in the Ukraine,

Poland with your own farm. With my own farm and, you know, big city beaches everywhere. Yeah, that make in vodka, that's paradise right there. Potato vodka, superior. I'm gonna bring bourbon to the Ukraine. That's what I'm gonna do.

My own special type of bourbon, Ukrainian bourbon. That's my goal. That's my goal. I'm sure you're not. All right, Josh, what makes you a rage? Did I already ask? No, probably, God, probably MasterCard. Cause I was gonna, I yelled at Nick

cause both of you, for some reason, after fucking Trump put that street shitter and the goddamn FCC, everybody put on that neutrality. Everybody, like, well, I guess if Trump doesn't like it, then I don't like it. Well, I like it. You like that neutrality? You like that neutrality? That neutrality has existed since before the dot-com boom.

So people who said it came about in 2014 are just wrong. The status from Title II and Title III changed after like the fourth lawsuit with Verizon finally pushed it to a different classification. And now everybody says, well, look, this didn't exist until Obama's bad. Therefore, this is bad. It didn't exist before 2014, which is just wrong.

And the thing is, the big thing with net neutrality, even if you don't like the implementation of it You should support the concept and you should want to see that in force because right now You're looking at all these alternatives, right? Yeah, you're looking at how hard it is for something like gab to start up and compete with Twitter because you got it You got to compete with it on a bunch of different levels Yeah, and then you can't even monetize it But imagine if you couldn't connect to it. That, then you're just,

fuck, good luck trying to convince people to switch ISPs to connect to your fucking shitty Twitter clone, it's never gonna happen. Yeah, by the way, did you see the Supreme Court thing where Apple can get sued now for being a monopoly with their App Store? Did you see that three days ago? Now I didn't know.

Oh, oh, dude, I don't know why nobody has seen this but me i think that apple controls the fucking media they have all the money in the world apple juice is not even apple it's they all know it very good trust busted everybody can get trust so everybody's ass is open now what's long overdue apple can now be sued for running a monopoly long over the supreme court decision that just came through i think have not even went to the liberal side or gorge did one of them they People can now be sued for running a monopoly. Long over. A big Supreme Court decision that just came through. I think Kavanaugh even went to the liberal side or Gors did. One of them, they split it, it was five, four.

It's great. It's great. They should be sued by everyone on the planet. I agree with you about the concept of net neutrality, but I think the details are so extremely important. It's almost impossible to discuss it without including them. Yeah, well, let me give you an anecdote because people like to say, okay, this got repealed last year and yet I'm still on the internet. Still on the internet. Doomsday never happens, still on the

internet. Yeah. Well, they know they can't. If they started restricting your access and Netflix, you know, to pay them $10 extra a month. They would have legislation passed through Congress in six hours. People, Congressmen would be waking up and crawling out of their fucking houses in pajamas. Like, where the fuck is my Netflix? You'd draft up a bill in the next 30 minutes and pass it through to get their fucking Netflix turned back on. In the Philippines, where I lived for about seven months, there was one telecom provider for both wired and for phones.

And they had tiered plans for their telephones and it ranged from full access to the five peso plan. Five Filipino pesos is to fuck off. But if you paid the five peso plan, you got a phone number and you got access to about 12 different websites. One of them was the telecommunication website and the other, would you want to guess what website they can access for five paces?

Born hub. No. The other paces. Facebook. Facebook subsidized the telecommunications bandwidth and allowed everybody in the Philippines to access it for very little. Now if you look at, there's a popular meme map where they show what each country consumes more than any other country. And the Philippines is the top world-wide consumer

of social media because everybody there can afford the five peso plan and they can get on Facebook. And while I was there, I could not find websites for almost any service or even government services, but I could go on Facebook and I could talk to people. So you're talking about a literal fucking nightmare, where the majority, 90% of the population can't access anything but Facebook. And even as a wired consumer, I had the router and everything,

$60 a month, 100 megabits per second. And if I went to Google or YouTube, it would never load. And I would have to use a VPN, hit the US, hit Google, and then it would load instantly. Because Facebook was paying them to throttle Google. So don't say it can't happen, or that that's like a foul. Well, no, I know that it can happen.

My problem is that the deeper, the deeper issue with net neutrality is that local governments have made it cost prohibitive legally to set up competing ISPs because they are not allowed to access the last mile, which I feel like is owned by the public and they absolutely should be. And that I think should be challenged by the FTC and not the FCC. I think the FTC is built to challenge something like that. And if net neutrality goes through, they're going to remove the FTC's ability to do so, turn it into a public utility.

It's already been around though. I agree with you 100% and I think there's some keep that. Like if there is competition, like they remove that and there's competition again, fine, get rid of that neutrality and have people shop around for ISPs, whatever. But that doesn't exist. To the point where even Google,

trying to lay their fucking magic fiber, they can't do it. Because it's so prohibitive and they, if Google Is a country with it's fucking money breaking into a market Someone fucked up. Something fucked up somewhere. Yeah, there's a problem. Yeah And well again, and then my my problem with their solution is it seems like like if you're a big company like Google The problem is like once you identify a problem. You don't fight it, you just learn how to swim, like you learn how to adapt to it.

So now, then Google goes like, oh, okay, Nendotrylides, it's very important. Let's do it. Taxpayers should pay for all infrastructure upgrades. Right. And I like that. No. No.

Obviously they're going to try to get the government to bankroll their fucking fiber. That's a different issue. You said something about how Google didn't say anything about article 13, which is wrong. I think you actually go to the Twitter profile for YouTube right now. The Twitter banner is,

save your internet fight Article 13. It's been like that a week and weeks. I think you said something about Google not saying anything about Article 13. They fall for Net neutrality. They fought against Article 13, they fought for Net neutrality, they fought against Article 13 because if Google doesn't like anything, they don't like DMCA,

because DMCA fucks up their business model. I did see what you're talking about. I think that's a paper tiger. Like I don't think, I think they put that out, but I think that they could, I think Google could fight a hell of a lot harder than they're currently fighting. Slip service.

Yeah. I think maybe they just don't see the point, Google could fight a hell of a lot harder than they're currently fighting. Flip service. Yeah. I think maybe they just don't see the point, like they know somebody in the corporate knows, like this is fun. The palms are already greased, the EU already made up its mind. We can spend, you know, five billion dollars and then multinational crossing language, barrier, advertising campaign in every country in the EU and we're not going to be able to swing all they had to do was get those stupid Swedish MPs to just click the right button as it turned out at the end of the day

are those article article 11 and 13 passed because the the people in charge of voting clicked the incorrect button well, they just fucking redo it. That's my bullshit. Yeah. Reduacity said. All right, real quick question. So the last mile question, when I was in Anglewood for 10 years, a 20 years ago, I could get the copper was basically a commodity and I could get any, I got speak easy, an internet provider.

Is that no longer the case? Did they, did that expire with copper? There can be no new ones. They don't share it. And the little ISPs have been bought up across the entire country by the year. Zero no longer exists for it. Yeah.

When I was growing up, Earthlink was a, the Earthlink offices, their servers were a mild downstreet from my house. Right. No, don't exist anymore. It's not there. All right, Josh, get out of here. Plug your stuff.

Hey, it was good stuff, Josh. Good talk. I'll find a dog too. Yeah, yeah, nice to be here. What do you think of the weeb wars? The Vic Lasagna stuff, isn't it, great? Oh, yeah, it will, I guess Nick isn't here. So I can't compliment him too hard, but isn't it nice seeing Nick all grown up with his big channel and thousands and thousands of daily watchers? It is. It's so nice. It's great. I was talking to Gary Adelman, my lawyer for the lawsuit, and he was, he was saying that

they watched his first videos in the office, and he's like, yeah, we couldn't understand why so many people are watching this guy in the middle of nowhere, like dissecting this lawsuit line by line. I said, man, you should see him now. He's got 10,000 people now 10,000 people in his neck last night I was on there with him and he was cross examining me and I mean of course I had to fuck with him but it was so much fun it was everyone needs to go watch that everyone needs to support his Patreon yeah go for a new project he's on new project he's on project to give Nick money Nick is doing great stuff. Nick is doing today greatest fucking job

He I don't know who I hate more Nick or Harvey Y. I think it's drunken and dorses everyone. Yeah, well Here's a lot of people who are like angry at him because they're jealous that this fucking big. Exactly. Here comes in and just immediately like mobs up all their dragon. Exactly. Drama. Yeah. Yeah. I just And since before I ever met Nick, I've been saying I need to get rich and just do pro bono criminal defense. And that's what he's doing now. Cause he's only off new project too. He just in a sucker.

Uh, it is great. And he has some of them on and they, they just can't hang with Nick. Yeah. He's such a, he's such a fury, he's sharp. Energy, he has no shit. He could make, he could make a million dollars in New York City, but he's happy doing what he's doing in his family. He's doing it right. He's got his wife, homeschooling, his five kids. Yeah, big piece of land.

Josh, you're dating anybody? Am I dating anybody now? It's okay, they don't speak English. Are you fuckable? What the hell kind Josh, you're dating anybody? Am I dating anybody? No, they don't speak English. Are you fuckable? What the hell kind of? Are you fuckable? All right. It's time to end this show.

Yeah, you're out of here. Get out of here. I like it. Josh, I got the, the brunt end of my question. Sorry, Josh. No problem.

No problem. I'll see you, buddy. I think my favorite thing about Noel, he wants to ask me a question and my answer was, look, I'll tell you the answer but I just want you to never fuck with me and his response was, no, I'll tell you if I fuck with you

for, I'll tell you before I fuck with you. So I answered the question anyway. He's a great guy. You got all the information. Let me get the hard men working hard in here. Let me get them in here. Null's a great guy as long as you don't mind. John, don't worry. We're ending soon.

We're ending soon. Null's a great guy as long as you don't mind every piece of your life being on the internet. Yeah, exactly. Indistinguishable. But you know this. If you, yeah, he's not trying to fool you, I don't have that. No, he's completely honest.

He's a known chaos. All. I don't have it. No, he's completely. He's a known, a known chaos. All right. All right. All right. I get the hard men working hard here. Guys unmute yourselves for God's sake. Yeah. Look, Ambra. Get on here and the other ones. Good day. Hello. Hello. Hi. Hey, it was great to see you guys in Australia. Thanks for coming out. So you've called in to congratulate me on five years of podcasting. Thank you very much. Coach, move your head. Well, please. You're most welcome.

Oh, shit. Lequimbra. Yeah. I owe you stems. Fuck, I'm sorry. That's sorry. Yeah, that's why we're here. We're here for the stem, Sean.

Fuck, man. We need to get Sean. God, what a dick. What are you guys working on here? He's muted at the moment. Okay. What are you guys working on here? But he's muted at the moment. Okay. What are you doing?

What makes you a rage? Oh, I wasn't expecting to, to, to call in and actually I was just listening in you. Okay. I mean, He's a pretty mellow guy. Is he? Yeah. I'm surprised he's got a wholesome.

That's kind of hard to do. I do. I'm surprised he's got a wholesome. That's kind of how I do this. I do. Okay. Like a real job. All right. All right. Lecambra, what makes you a rage? Hmm.

Hmm. Same guys. Oh, when you're on the toilet and you're taking a big dump and then you have to wipe your ass, but there's still a big chunk of shit there. Yeah. That's pretty annoying. And then you end up wiping, you know, half an hour, run out of toilet paper.

That's, that's yeah. It's like trying to get away with noisiness. He's a better out of, out of shag carpet. All right, you son of a bitch. I like you. That's a stolen joke by the way, that was. That was such a great out of Kerala. That's a great analogy, right?

Asia, Asia, where are you? He's the, he's the Twitter thing. I'm you yourself, you dick. Oh, hey, what's up? There you are. What makes you a rage, buddy? I'm actually feeling pretty good. I'm, I'm not doing too bad today.

All right. Thank you for all your music, I believe it's five years. Thank you for the support music over these five years. Thank you for the support. That's all right, mate. It's also a deal by Ray. I have something very quick. What are you going? It's when you send someone a direct message on Twitter and it says that they've seen

it, but they don't respond. I'm not naming any names. Okay. Dick Masterson. Oh, yeah. We've been getting left on red. Wait, that's a lot of man to your red. You're made by getting left on red. Wait, that's a nice, you're a rapper. You're made by getting left on red by dudes.

Not hot chicks on Instagram. Just one dude. Just okay. All right, all right, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, look, Amber. I'm sorry for leaving you on read. I'm gonna play a song. I'm gonna play a song you sing because you are such a dick.

This is a Lecambra song called Just. Here we go. Lecambra, hard men working hard, Just. A message for dick, it's beautiful. It's beautiful. Thank you guys for all your music. It's really changed the entire show. The God of training.

Fuck that up. To try to please me. You cannot get up off the floor I don't imagine, you're too familiar with your own penis anymore more hot dogs and pizza whiskey double you've ever seen a side bomb I took the good times I take the fat times

I'll take you just the way you are. Fat times. Fat times. You're a fat fuck too. What are you talking about me? Fat times. Just that you sell. I say it because I'm like, you're a big fatso as well. I fuck you. You don't want to be like me. I'm trying to warn you.

You sing like Michael Jackson, but you are fat like Michael Moore. But he has kids. Don't listen to look,ber, you're beautiful. No, I'm not. Good at work, man. Thanks, guys. Who'd you like? Who'd you like?

Thanks, Dick. Cheers. We got Grant Mooney. Okay, let's get him on. He's being king of singing. Grant Mooney, are you there? Fuck. He was.

Oh. That's beautiful. Beautiful. He was. Oh. That's beautiful. That's beautiful. What's up, Dick? Hey, what's up, man? What was that? You can do it. I'm kind of like asshole harmonica, that was amazing.

That was a melodic, melodica. Yeah, melodica. Yeah, I got one of those soon. How you doing? Happy 50th birthday. Thank you. Thank you for congrat going happy, happy 50th birthday. Thank you. Thank you for congratulating me at my 50th birthday. My beard is 50 years old.

I love you notice that. Well, I got my dad's gray hairs implanted on my chin. Oh, gotcha. So it looks like, so it just makes you look wiser. Yeah, much wiser. Thank you, Grant. Thank you for calling in to congratulate me on five years in podcasting. I think you're the oldest musical contributor to my podcasting career. Is that right? I don't know

how old is he? Well, no, no, no, the oldest because he was the longest. Maddox lost song. It was the first, I think that was the first fan song we played. Whatever happened to Chris Strand. I missed that guy. Oh, I don't know. Yeah. I'm having a run. I'll go find the other than the IIC. Oh, good. Yeah. Good. What makes you a rage, Grant? I guess we were talking about this on thought cops like an episode ago, considering you're talking about beards, but the whole blank has shit particles in it, clickbait headline anytime, anytime someone finds a new scientific study with E. Coli particles and someone's beard or on McDonald's screens or something like that.

It's just like, yeah, great. This does nothing for me. Thanks for that. Your wife has E. Coli all over her. Throw her away. That's what I think that I could throw her in the dumpster. You need to check out that Shag rug. Yeah. Nobody washes their hands. Everything that you, your life is full of excrement. You are mostly particles of shit. Deal with it. You are coated with a film of feces. I was told that I was star dust. Yeah.

You'll digress, I'd like to. Did you ever grant Mooney? Did you ever think it would come to this five years later when you sent in that Titanic song that you would have a thriving podcast? And that this... I didn't even think you would play it. Not unbelievable. And here we are. Change in love. podcast and that this I didn't even think you would play it.

Unbelievable. And here we are. We're changing lives. What has been your favorite part of this five years? I should have asked everybody that. What has been your favorite part? Oh, man. For you personally, I mean, what about the show has has had an effect on you personally?

How much have I meant to you and me and Sean meant? That's what I'm trying to say. How have we influenced your life? I talked about this when you were on an episode of ours but you know it it changed my life. My life was going in one direction and then I started listening to the biggest problem and then it went in a complete opposite direction. I'm sure you're there for Bernie but instead you voted for Trump. Yes. All these things with me. That's exactly the point I was and a complete opposite direction. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good.

I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good.

I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good.

I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you're good. I'm sure you Oh good. I'm playing the Titanic song by Grant Mooney right now. Here we go. I love this. This is this I think was really the end of that podcast. This brings back so many memories. I've never known any house house love you. It's a feeling I get. Because it's so funny. Nothing to ever talk. I loved it. Yeah. Every week, I have to look at his fucking sour pussy. I'm even so angry. I'm sick of that.

You're really sick. You're such a little girl about. I feel like I'm a girl about to say. Nobody lost. Howdy. Oh, nice. Oh, wow. Nice.

Nice. It's not still cold. Mystery Dick Theater. Oh Wow nice like nice mystery dick theater Oh, man, that's the first I really felt a connection To people when I got this song for the first time I thought yeah, you get it everybody why this is funny. I'm gonna keep doing it. I'm gonna keep doing it forever. Five years, ten years. It was 20 years. 20 years. It pissed them off. Oh, it did.

I didn't even hear it. It's a reaction. Only a few clips of the reaction, and I knew. I knew he hated it. All there is in life is pissing people off. That's the only thing that The only thing that's important in life is annoying people. Yeah. That's why don't ask me if it's joke or not. Maybe I believe it. Maybe I don't. Are you pissed that I win? Then I win. I've already won. All right, guys. Grant, thank you. Thank you so much for everything. Thank you, Dick. Good luck. The thought cops. They're podcasts.

Dotcomspot podcast. .com. .com. .com slash.com. Oh, is he there? Is Kevin there? Yeah, he happens here all the time. What's up? We guys sharing a phone, gay. No, we were recording a episode.

All right. All right. Get out of here. Did you guys do the gender swap Snapchat filters? We did not know. Good. Good. Good. I didn't want to hear your ex. I'm not know. Okay. Good. Good. Good. I didn't want to hear your.

Good. I'm for bless you. It is good. All right. See you guys. Thank you. Later. See you. Hard been working hard. Obviously you guys are absolute champions.

Thank you so much for everything you've done for the show. Yeah. Thanks, buddy. You too. See you on the next tour. You that message I sent you did get that voice smell right? It's very important. I don't feel so bad about it.

I'm not responding to my messages. I'll play it right now. Look, I know what you're talking about now. I'll play it right now. I just said the same thing this morning. Dig, by the way, you told me to get a sandwich for you and it takes you back. Which sandwich should you get?

Yeah. Okay, everybody. I didn't get that message. It's a pretty easy. Everyone loves it. All right, all right. Sean, I think should you get? Yeah. Okay, everybody. Get that message. It's a pretty easy. Everyone loves capacity. All right. All right. Sean, I think we're wrapping up here.

All right. Unless you want to talk about abortion more, I know that you are all about it earlier. I'm good. I'm good on abortion. You're good on abortion. Yeah. Doesn't Doug's segment seem so long ago? It does, doesn't it?

It does. Because it was the re-smorning. I got some advice. I guess we can get to that next time. No. I think the best advice was mixing up your burrito. We got plenty of time. Everybody.

Go ahead. Yeah, no, I agree. Actually, that's the best advice is mixing up your burrito. Thank you, everybody, for listening for the last five years. We've had a lot of fun. No, yes. Thank you, Dick. Thank you I do, thank you, Dick. Well, thank you for congratulating me, Sean.

Yeah, congratulations to you as well. Thanks for everybody. Thank you very much. It's been, it's still the most fun thing I do every week. Yeah. We can tie that in your face. It has not gotten, no, it's never gotten old. No, it's always a blast.

Never will. It is all I think about. The listener contributions, all of that. it's it's so much fun yeah Here's to another five years. Yeah, we're gonna get some we're gonna get some big-titty hose in here I promise over the next five years. We're gonna have highs and lows and more lawsuits Apparently because there's people there's always fucked people running around trying to fucking stump us always. That's what I've learned.

That's what I've learned from the show is that life is a continuum of people trying to fuck with you every day. And all you have to do is try to put your hands on their heads and push them harder. That's all you got to try to do. You can't end it. You can never end the continuum of, no of non-faced, exed out people trying to fuck with you out of jealousy

or proud their own problems. You've just got to let them suffer and die and you have to concentrate on all your own shit and not think about it. Focus on the good stuff. everybody for listening this is the dick show dick dick dot show patreon.com slash the dick show the dick show that come i see next Tuesday this is by and congratulations to me of course on five years of podcast this is the biggest problem anniversary song, here we go. Oh, that's cool.

It is really remarkable. We've been to space. We've had the funniest lawsuit that's ever been had. And met the creator of Earthworm Gym. That is awesome. We've had multiple best-selling Billboard starting album. Launch half a dozen careers at least. Yeah. It's like they have to Vic Blasagna's life. I don't think there's any downplaying that.

Because of the show, they have Blasagna and I as a career. We stopped that one guy from killing himself when 80s girl tricked me into thinking that she gave up the generator. We've learned how to flip fried eggs correctly. Boy, this show really has covered it all. I'm gonna piss dole someone. Yeah. Someone calls me a Nazi or a pedophile.

That's coming up. I love that. That's gonna be real. That's really a great idea. Larry doesn't know what he's you know what I want to I want to say that Larry has no chance against me but you never you cannot underestimate old guys no I'm gonna say yes no chance against you I know man those five times used to be a little bigger. No, but... Close four.

No, I... Larry's been talking a lot of big game about that chip for so long. I feel like he's gonna be talking a lot of big game about his arm wrestling. Yeah, it's all right. I told him, let me look at it as soon as it came up so that we could sue. But... Here we go. Here's the voicemail that Lecambra wanted me to play. Oh, we didn't even get to talk about Dr. Rachel's tits that Chris

the Kiwi apparently is. I'm really curious about. No, I have. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Hey, Dick, it's me, Sean, hosted the hit podcast, the Sean show. Nice. This is how I talk. I just wanted to call and say thank you for graciously hosting me, Sean, on my international tour. I had such a great time with all my fans, the Sean hits. It's a family couldn't make it. All jokes aside, it's been an amazing five years of quality podcasting and incredible growth. We've all grown together, especially you, Dick. You've grown so, so much. Oh. You know you don't have to grow all at once.

Anyway, I'm here with my crib and I've got to get back to all my bitches in a weed. Is that how you talk? Just like that. Just like that. And I'm going to delete all these bitches clothes and place my gear in an improper area. I'm going to delete all these bitches clothes and place my gear in an improper area. I'm pushing them.

I'm going to be. Oh, phenomenal. Did we ever listen to your episode when you brought, when I did get the cool Sean transcription? Did we ever listen to the whole thing? No, not the whole thing. Some of them. We should.

I don't know, it's funny. If I got to put my earthworm Jim comic up, you got to play that episode. That's, my comic is embarrassing as fuck. Is it really, know if it's funny. If I gotta put my Earthworm Jim comic up, you gotta play that episode. That's my comic is embarrassing as fuck. Is it really, I bet it's drawn, but I bet it's drawn pretty well, huh? Yeah, but it's just like, it's the earnestness of a child.

Yeah, it's a, who's not, who's not, who's not like anticipating shame. Yeah, but you do that, you. 14, 15, yeah. See, that's different. Well, what makes it embarrassing is that I still in my darkest of hearts feel that way and putting it up will reveal that.

Like, I will, you build this, tough, you build this exterior. How long is it? I don't know. It's in the, I think it's only a couple pages. Oh, excuse me. Making a comic is a lot harder than it. Here's the good news. How long is it? I don't know. I think it's only a couple pages. Making a comic is a lot harder than it. Here's the good news. Even though you just said what you said,

no one will think that that's what you think now. What? People have to allow for their 15 year old selves being different. So they will never commit your brain. Your brain is shameful. And wrong. Yeah, and wrong.

And illegal. Okay, here's Facebook. We're gonna end on Facebook news. Okay. Hazen Cruz and, oh fuck, I forgot. That's terrible of me. Hazen Cruz and Alan from, not for human consumption made a Facebook news.

Please just let them read the news. I know. We've been over. It's gonna be, hi, this is Stewie Griffin. And I've got the Facebook, no, no, no, no, please God, please God. Let's say, let's say, okay, what do you think? Do give me a thumb sideways for the emperor. Oh, what, let's all do a thumb up or down.

At the end, no, no, no, no, we'll do it. Everybody close their eyes. Okay, everybody close your eyes. And then as you feel it, start indicating, you know, like a dial, like a suicide DACA. Here we go. Hello, Dick and hello, Dick heads. When do we open up the Facebook group? Until the end, the last couple of days. Play early wants to know, when you're home alone, do you shit with the door open? As expected, the vast majority of responses were yes, regardless of someone is home or not. Allison says she has to keep the door open.

Otherwise her cats go insane. Kyle's reasoning for keeping the door open is simple. Who wants the hot box with their own stink pickles? Abortion is an extra spicy topic this week on unbelievable. Oh, huge success. They just love the news already. Already unbelievable success. Yeah, everybody's was.

You should do you shit with the door open or close when you're home by yourself? No, ready, unbelievable success. Yeah, everybody's was on fire. I assume. Do you shit with the door open or close when you're home by yourself? You know, I've done, I've definitely done open. You've done open. I have, but no, I normally close the door out of habit. My thinking is you never know who's gonna come home and I don't want shit particles getting out of the bathroom

and getting all over my stuff. You turn on the fucking vent and you close the door. Yeah, I would say almost always out of habit, just close the door. Close the door, getting all over my stuff. You turn on the fucking van and you close the door. Yeah. I would say almost always out of habit, just close the door. Close the door because it's, yeah. Okay. Next, Hayes and Cruz. The Facebook group, as Anthony John, simply posting only the word abortion garnered everything

from rees to yikes to apathy. The Lamar says he lives in Alabama and doesn't care that they've banned abortion. Grandmaster Chimes in saying, fuck, metal coat hanger salesman, it is. Danny Smith is looking for engagement ring advice when it comes to the size of the rock and how much to spend. Some of the suggestions include, if you're going to marry her, you should know her well enough to know what she wants. If she doesn't accept a ring that isn't branded as an engagement ring and isn't solid diamonds, she's a cut and you should leave her. Jump off of a bridge, tell her you don't believe in marriage.

Just break up with her and save herself the money and finally just make a pearl out of your come. Christian offers a hut. Wow. I don't know, you could do that. I'm not sure you can. No, you can because you could you could compress like dead pets into a diamond. Yeah. So you can probably compress your semen. I guess there's a carbon in that or whatever to you. There has to be a custom. Yeah. Everything's an organic compound. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. So you could if you really loved a woman, you would jerk off into a two liter bottle for three years. Yeah. And then I've seen to compress into a diamond. That's the next debirz commercial.

That is, you want some of that dedication, commitment. Just diamonds. Yeah, that jizz guy, Lord Chan, is gonna make a big turn at the end and surprise everyone. Okay, here we go. A lot of your comments. Christian offers a hot take on Sean, saying that he's a pussy that always takes a neutral stance, adding that he's been listening to the show quite regularly.

And Sean always seems to take the middle ground to stay likable. And response, Tyler reminds Christian that Sean definitely has a hard stance on t-shirts. This has been the Facebook group news from the last four days. Funny. Yeah, Sean, you do always take the middle ground. Yeah. Yeah. Like I, when I said that I should legally be allowed to build a nuclear bomb in the garage.

I don't, I don't know. I don't remember you saying absolutely. That's a great idea. There was something less than that. It was not that. Yeah. Do you have anything you say to that guy? Yeah. He hasn't been listening to the show. Yeah. What a middle, what a middle ground thing to say. Yeah. All right. Goodbye, everybody. Thank you. So yeah. Thank you. What a middle what a middle ground thing to say. Yeah. All right. Goodbye everybody. Thank you. See ya. Thank you.