The Dick Show - Episode 2 – Dick on Fathers Day

Episode Date: June 14, 2016

Download this Episode Islam is a religion of peace and a political ideology of subjugation, conquest, and death. I don’t know what’s so difficult for people to understand about that. I try to untangle the knot in this HIGH ENERGY episode the only way I know how, by shouting. For all my Big Ballers on … Continue reading "Episode 2 – Dick on Fathers Day" The post Episode 2 – Dick on Fathers Day appeared first on The Dick Show.

Yeah! Welcome to the Dic show! The Echoeist podcast in the world. Dic show, get plenty of dick. You need more dick? This is the show where you get it. Your source for dick. This is your source for dick. It's what everybody wants. It's the only podcast where everything is a contest.

With me is always a Sean. Hey, dick. Hey, what's going on, Sean? And with me today is a special guest auditioning to be my co-host, a very good friend of mine, Larry Blidener. Hi, Dick. Larry, you are the author of Mac Daddy. Yes.

Which is the, what is it, the authoritative guide? It's the last word on how to be a dad. The last word on how to be a dad. Yeah. I wanted to have you on this show this episode specifically because Father's Day is coming. Absolutely. A not properly celebrated holiday,

and I say it gets a fraction, a fraction of the Bidian spent on Mother's Day on dads. We're the neglected parent. That's part of what I wanted to ask you. I know, the only thing I know about being a dad is asking girls what their dads are like and hoping that they were bad. So I think we need an actual dad in here to answer some questions.

Yeah, we're going to get to that. Let's get through some fan mail first because I'm pumped. I'm pumped about the show, man. Rip it baby. What am I showing these guys right now? Can they see what he's showing? Yeah, you can see. Well, you're going to put it.

Can everybody see the sternate comments? The sternate the ceiling. You can see the sternate. Sean, I would have put it. Can everybody see the stern of comments? The stern of the ceiling. I mean, the stern of the ceiling. Sean, that's not a camera. What you're holding is only a reading device. You're doing it from my head. I have the camera from here. You were going to do it from here.

I was going to do it from everybody listening. I'm coming out in the know my patrons on patreon.com slash the dick show. My patrons, the big spenders, the $2020 spenders the guy with the guys with the big money The guilt baby the guys who want to show off. Yeah, how successful they are in life They pay 20 bucks a month to get the live feed right to get the live feed and to be in the chat room That's what we're talking about right now of course There was all kinds of fuckery getting this technology going because nothing works. Nothing works at all ever.

So what Sean's referring to is his live Hangout feed of the show. You do have that, right? I do have that. Okay. So if you want to be part of the live Hangout, go to thedickshow.com, find your way over to the Patreon page, kick in a little doll, show off, show everybody how much money you've got, how big your dick is,

and then you could be part of this conversation, right? What's up? Nothing. Do it, okay. Do your little stuff. Yeah, thank you. I'm pumped. This whole week I've been pumped.

I've been like, like when I go, when I go to the gym this week, I don't even need an O2, I don't need any creatine. I just go read the comments for the last show. And then I walk right through the fucking wall. That's how pumped up I am about Dick's show number one. They were good. They were good.

Everybody loved it, man. That was great. Here's some of the comments. Blaine Cooper, I love having Dick in my ears. Yeah. Jim McGrath, I'm so fucking happy Sean came with you. Because you're like the divorce victim. I know, I get two Christmases. Yeah.

You get two Christmases. And two deads. Yeah. Now instead of just, these are definitely both mothers, man. Now instead of just doing a lot of work for no money once a week, you get to do a lot of work for not enough money twice a week. Right? Yeah.

But you do this out of the love. Yeah, you don't do this for the money. Thank you, Sean. Because there's no money. Joe Rao, how do I get a shot at co-hosting? I want to own the podwaves. Joe, it's open. I'm going to get some fans in here to get their shot at co-hosting. I want to own the pod waves. Joe, it's open. I'm gonna get some fans in here

to get their shot at co-hosting too. I think this show, and the last show, had some of the funniest fans, smartest fans, and definitely the funniest fans of any podcast. So I'll be bringing fans in here. I think I might just open the phone lines one episode. Cool. Maybe you have a contest for that backdrop too.

Oh, what's that? The backdrop. The curtain. The paisley. You like what's that? The backdrop. The curtain. The paisley. You like the paisley. You know, there might be some day core types that could improve that for you. If you wanna know what Larry's talking about,

go to the Patreon. Yeah. Kicking some money. And you can see the feed yourself. Got a love of a long dick. Jordan, Scott, Ling, Zach Owen. I wish my dick could recover this fast, very funny. Joe Albert, how the hell was this URL

not already taken, the dickshow.com? Really? I thought it would be full of gay porn, right? Makes sense. It's probably the only URL associated with the dick name that isn't. Yes, that's up position, pencils out.

But it wasn't. Okay, here's an announcement. Larry, as you know, this show is my never-ending quest. Is there a weird sound? There's a lot of weird sounds. Should I shut this fan off or turn it down? Okay, so the point of this show is to find the perfect co-host. Right. For me. And I think that that perfect co-host is a huge rage monster. You know what I mean? Yes.

I mean, somebody who has a bottomless pit of rage, like mythical, their rage is mythical. Like, they'll tell stories of this man's rage or woman's rage throughout the rest of time. Yes. So that's what the purpose of this podcast was. And last week, we had our first contestant in the show where everything is a contest, the Allegra Ringel, where she brought in what makes her a rage, and then the audience voted on whether or not she is a rage or not. The results are in.

How did they look? Well, she would probably think this was good news, but Allegro was voted not a rage. So, spots still open. Guys, that's what I'm saying. Spot still open. So you're looking for a bottomless pit of boiling bile. I think so, yeah.

I mean, somebody, my last co-host, he once was enraged because I said, water is blue. And he said, no, it's not. That's the level of rage we're talking about. Contentious. Contentious, right? And the sky's not blue either. We could go there, but,

well, actually, you would know, right? You're kind of an astronomy type, dude. Look, it's blue. It's blue. I look up and it's blue. That works. All right. Um, I'll tell you what does make me a rage this week, though. What? And this is something that we would have never got to talk about on the old show. And this is something that we would have never got to talk about on the old show. We all know what just happened in Florida. Yes. Right? Yes.

Huge tragedy. Well, I'll disagree with you there. That it's a huge tragedy. Yes. Why do you want to be a great... To me, it's because it's... I like already the disagreeing. Why?

Because it wasn't by definition a tragedy The tragedy is an earthquake that kills a bunch of people or a or a brush fire or a shipwreck. That's a tragedy You're making the semantic argument right no No, I think you're talking about Fucktard shoots up a club like that. That's an atrocity and I'll tell you something and I only say that because it's, you know, I'm a stickler for pin pointing words. Yeah. No, you're right. And when people, they say this all about all this other shit that goes on, they're always, oh, that's such a trace. Not a fucking tragedy. It's a fucking atrocity. It is an atrocity. A big difference.

You're right. You know, popular usage has changed a lot of words. And it's kind of fucked it up. It's fucked it up. And it takes out the horror of it. When you see a tragedy, when your dog dies, a tragedy is getting a fatal disease. These are all tragedies that are sort of... Tragedy is something that happens to you. And it's something that someone decided to do. Correct.

Yeah. I've read a lot of stuff on the internet that's pissed me off about it in the last couple days. One, yeah, exactly what you're talking about. This is just a thing that's a whole thing. And it's the idea that we're not allowed to have a position on it because it's not appropriate. Well, folks, this is what happens now. The idea that we've got to wait to weigh in

on these terrorist attacks is a luxury that I don't think we have, that we've thrown away by fucking around. That's a luxury that people who make a lot of good decisions leading up to these things happen. And we've not been doing that in my opinion. No, not at all. It is an atrocity.

It is an atrocity. It is an atrocity. It's a quote someone who's really, shouldn't be brought into the conversation, but he actually had the perfect phrase, Charles Manson would say, you have to come into the now. And this is the new now. Yeah, this is the new fucking faces.

This is the new fucking now, and people do not want to face it. No. And there goes the potential co-host job. Ha, ha, ha, ha. And what I see all the time is I brought this up on the other show, but it's this not only is it not all blanks. Everybody says not all Muslims. Islam is a religion of peace, right?

And I'm fine with that, because I want to draw a very, a very sure distinction right now. Sure, Islam's religion piece. Okay, when a religion becomes a political ideology, is when it tries to enforce those beliefs on everybody else. You know what I'm saying? And this is what I'm saying about about Islam in general, which which the Twitter sphere has pissed me off in their defense of it is that it is not at this point, it is not just a religion. It is also also an extremely motivated

political ideology. It is a government. It is a government that is using religion as a crutch to push these atrocities. And it's very, it's almost from their side, the perfect way to do it. Because you push out, you push out all the goodness. You push the goodness in front, right? Because there's a certain percentage of a tremendous amount of these people that are innocent, that are practicing Islam like

a religion, like you would think of a religion as just a system of beliefs, right? Whatever you want to do with your system of beliefs, do it. Whatever you think happened, you think there's a guy in the sky that's looking down on you and judging you this way or that way. You think doing these, you think doing these acts, you think participating in ceremony is going to put you curry favor with this guy. Fine. But as soon as you start pushing other people to do it, now you got a government, right? So I don't understand why everyone keeps repeating that this is, that this is in any way related to religion. It's related to the politics of Islam. I mean, is that crazy? And I know that it's, and then everyone says,

well, Christian, well, what about Christianity? There's horrific acts done in the name of Christianity every day. Right? Well, you know what, I'm just going to give it to him. Like, let's say the Ku Klux Klan is a religious organization or it was, let's say bombing abortion clinics was religiously motivated. Right? Let's just throw all of Utah into it. Let's throw all of gay marriage into it. Let's throw all of gay marriage into it, right?

All of it, abortion into it. All of it is religiously motivated, religiously motivated activism, right? Brutal activism, which people will look at and say like, well, it's the same then, you know? That alone should convince you that there is a problem here, because it's so similar similar because we as a society

rain hell on the political parts of Christianity constantly. You know what I'm saying? We were used, we're used to being, we're used to beating that dog down. We're used to taking Christianity and looking at it and saying, okay, you guys can, you can believe those things. You can participate in church. You can have that, but the second you start telling everybody else what they're allowed

and not allowed to do, we will fucking hammer you. Legislating morality. Oh, and everybody does it collectively. And there is no sacred calves, right? Everybody shits on Catholicism for it, and Christian, and good. It's good, because the last thing you want is that dog to start biting, right? And on the other hand, this dog over here that we're dealing with, I'm talking about Islam, this dog thinks it's people that line between religion and political ideology is not accepted accepted and it's really pissing me off

It's really pissing me off because you've got entire governments That are just founded on these founded on principles and they're not founded on the the feel good principles, right? They're founded on the principles Where you go take over everybody else and start making them do things take over everybody else and start making them do things. Let's look at the numbers. ISIS says they have a kill list of 8,000 Americans. And I think after today, it's going to be 8,000 and one. Oh, man.

They're coming for you, baby. Get out that pair of rogue. Well, Larry, I'm already on the list. We're all already on the list. That's what drives me insane. Last week, I was joking with Allegra and I said, what do you like most about Trump? Do you like that he's trying to protect women

by keeping radical Islam out of the country? And she made this face like, no, God no. I'm like, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. What does everybody, like what are these celebrities that are so concerned that are so concerned about Islamophobia what do they think people like me are trying to do like in in in an Islamic caliphate I win there's I'm a straight man who will do and say anything, right? Like this, their entire system is built for me. What am I, by fighting it, by trying to expose something about it that is wrong, the only

people who benefit are the oppressed, are women, are in this case gay men. Like these are the people that are, that 8,000 list, that 8,000 list does not include every single gay man in America, every single woman in America, right? And what's the size of that list then? 2010, 20 million people? It's, how many do you think are, how many gays are there?

Just gay or? I'm sorry, yeah, just gay. Just gay. What do you think? I think it's around 10%. They figure 30 million. Man, I tell you, if I was a gay man,

I would be very concerned about this problem. I would be very concerned about the problem with radical Islam. Yeah. I'm only a little bit gay and look at how fired up. Look at you. Look at you now. You know, when you get that fire in the eyes, Dick.

Uh oh. Huh? Right. Yeah. Um, well, that's what's making me a rage this week. I mean, I don't even need to get into the stats of it because I think the whole thing is just, is a brilliant ad campaign. You've got the religious part

and then you hammer the political part behind the scenes. You bamboozle everybody with the religion. And this is, oh, this is religion. What's the same as yours? And then behind the scenes, you got some small percentage of people hammering the politics through. Sure.

And we know that when it comes to Christianity, we know what that looks like, and we fight it all the time. It is protecting people from religion, no matter what religion it is, is eternal vigilance. Like everybody in society is wary of it. You know what I mean? We are, and we mock it.

We mock it mercilessly. We don't attack it with weapons. We don't attack it with weapons. We don't attack it with bombs. We're not nuking the South, right? We just mock it. We expose it, we mock it, and we got it. We got to start doing that. We can't be afraid of this shit anymore. Well, the whole approach is a cock-eyed. What's it going to come to where everybody lives in a perimeter with machine gun nests around the house and metal detectors everywhere?

I mean, this is of these have to happen before you one starts packing. Right. Well, I'm never gonna do that, but then I'm like, well, wait a minute. What's the number? What's the exact number, right? Oh, anyway.

That's my, that everybody's bringing up gun control. Like this has anything to do with gun, like the, like they wouldn't have made a bomb. Right. Like they couldn't have driven a car. Like the, like obtaining a gun was the hardest part of this. The hardest part of this was convincing someone to murder hundreds of people. Like that's much harder than getting a gun,

than building a gun, than inventing a fucking gun. Well, they will always, always conflate those issues to drive the anti-gun agenda always. Yeah, I don't know, man. I don't know how that's got to change, right? I mean, we can't move, we can't keep hammering that point. Can we, of somehow gun control is gonna stop this? That's what they think.

Yeah. You know, again, in Boston, well, where was the pressure cooker control? What about Mick Vey? And Mick Vey, yeah, he blew up with 200 plus people with a full advantage. For a little bit of shit. With a full advantage. A full advantage.

I mean, come on, if people want to kill, they will find a way to kill. And by the way, this asshole in Florida, you know, he was a paid, so-called professional security guard who acquired his weapons perfectly legally, you know, and he subcontracted the Department of Homeland Security. That's the irony of it. No, and he worked for an organization that drove, they called them, they called them non-Mexican

immigrants, that drove them from the border to other places to put them on buses So they would go back, but there's no there's no verifying that at all So he worked for an organization that just picks up people Ferries them all over It's not a disillusion. No, it's terrifying. Happy is place on her Serifying That's terrifying. It's coming apart at the seams, guys.

I don't think that's crazy. I don't think it's crazy because we're not even talking about the same thing anymore. Like, the conversation about this huge, horrifying, atrocious problem is not, we're not even talking about the same thing. Everybody's talking past each other. I mean, I don't even know what we're, we don't even know what the goal we're working toward is.

It's true. Making sure we don't offend anybody. Yeah, I mean, that's what it has to be for me. That's a goal, don't step on anyways, toast, don't hurt their feelings. They could be dead, but at least we didn't even defend anybody. Yeah, I mean, that's what it has to be for me. That's a goal, don't step on anyways. Toast on her, they're feelings. They could be dead, but at least we didn't hurt their feelings. Amp. At least you're not a racist.

Yeah, at least you're not a racist. There you go. All right, Larry. Yes, sir. I took up too much time with my, the rant. With my offensive rant yet again. But the reason I thought you'd be a great co-host

for this show is because I do think you're a rage. I think these questions will prove it. Okay. And I think you're like the ultimate radio dad. Oh my God. Like that voice, this voice you have is like from a, from a prior era where men had to sound like they have great voices to be heard on the radio, right?

Like you listen to me in Maddox for two years and it sounds like two weasels getting their tails yank for an hour, right? It's like, but you have this like resonant voice that sounds like butter. Like it sounds like a maca-lin, 18-year-old scotch that's just pouring into your ear holes and sinking into the back of your throat.

You've seen my morning health measurement. How did you know that? Yeah. Funnel and maca-lin. Yeah. In the year. Okay, so I've got this interview for you. Lay it on me, baby.

All right. Question one. This is in your field of expertise. I like to start with your field of expertise. Okay. Fatherhood is your expertise. Partly. Fatherhood.

Yes. What's in it for me? What's in it for you? Chew from the hip, short and lifespan? Short and lifespan. Oh. For openers? Yeah. Yeah, it's, I mean, if you're into a corporate failure,

and you have an infant, it's gonna shit on you, it's gonna piss on you. Corporate failure is, you're aroused by feces. Oh yeah, it's gonna be a lot of, like, I had to put it together with contact. I know that. A lot of flopping. I lot of a lot of weird shit But that's not what I really shit is now one of them. Okay, the excruciating

No matter how careful you are how you're you're you're dipering techniques or you're changing tables Etc. You are gonna wind up splattered with shit and piss, you know pretty often That's a strike though. Yeah, I'm seeing that's why I bring it up because I'm seeing a lot of strikes. I think that go ahead. Well, I mean, it's, here's the thing on a, on a, on a, it's dependent. You know what? I'll tell you what, Dick, it's totally dependent on the, on, on the kid, right? Over which you have absolutely zero control. Mm-hmm. Okay. I don't, I'm happy. When I had one kid, I believed in the, in the nurture overriding the nature part of the equation, right? You've heard this, I'm sure, as a kid raised what's your product of the? So you've got, you've got two kids. I have two kids. I have

two girls. Well, now one's one's, one's 16 and the other one it know. Okay. Yeah. And they're both gorgeous and smart. And even worse. Even worse. Yeah. And so the first one, you know, we were convinced, oh, you know, aren't we slick? You know, we're the best parents of it because this kid, she was, you know, my first one was born. She was, she would sleep about 22 hours a day.

We thought she had narcolepsy or something, you know. But in fact, that's just what she needed to recharge. You know, she's actually building up a lot ahead of steam to really give us a pain in the ass later on. But the second one came along and almost killed me, okay, five years later, because she never slept. Okay. And I never was sick ever.

In the course of one year, I had pneumonia twice, thanks to. It's like an organ trail disease. It really, it was like holy crap. So you think that you've got a part of this, and then the first one was very cerebral, you know, she was reading at a very young age and always carrying a book in this for,

and the second one has come to be that now that she's 11, but when she was at the, you know, five, six years old, a book was something to shred and put in the toilet, you know, what she did off, and it was just fun, you know, so you have absolutely no control. You especially your book, Dick. Am I, yeah, she did my toilet, you know, what she did off, and it was just fun, you know. So you have an absolute no control. You especially your book, Dick. And mine.

Yeah, she did my, so you think, you know, you think you're, oh, well, look at me, look what I've raised. You haven't raised a goddamn thing. They, they, they come with their own agenda and hire a wide group. Because I seem, it seems like people, I'm glad you said that, because it seems like anybody going into it.

Yeah. Has a big ol' smile on their face. Like I compare it to anyone going late to the gold rush. Like the, you know, 1849, was that when almost? Yeah, 49. 49. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Going to the gold rush, but they're going two years late.

Yeah. And I'm like, well, I'm going to get there and I'm going to get me rich. Yeah. I got, it's going to be nothing but smooth sailing because I'm prepared for it. That's what I that's what I think of whenever I see a first time parent coming along. Of course. So I really want your perspective on it because it sounds like that like your nature versus nurture thing. It sounds like a look at the job. It is. It is. You know, and then by the time, you know, on the far side of it though, I used to joke when I'd walk around the two of them, when they were toddlers, people say,

oh, the old ladies at the supermarket were like, oh, these, and I would always answer my body guards. Well, now, they almost are, and they're pretty ferocious. And so it's like, at least I think having kids, I probably hope to not die alone, which many. Okay. So there's a good class. Somebody would be somebody to pour some account over your grave.

Execute your will. What if they put you in a home? Well, yeah, that would suck. Wouldn't it? Yeah, I know Guarantees no guarantees. You're right. Well expensive. It was like swing your home or something I'm not be okay, but do they have any of those? I think they're all swing your home like the Viagra do yeah But can you imagine how pissed off women of like 69 plus years old were when Viagra hit the scene

because you just now you just fight enough hard on at the retirement home with a machete, right? The incidence of STD's jumps has this crazy spike as a 16 and 69, like something like that because they're like, well, you know what? Yeah. Fuck it. Well, yeah, and they don't have to worry about pregnancy. No pressure, it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Why use protection? Fuck it, I can't get pregnant. Well, I ask because I think fatherhood is a hugely important role. It is. I think it is overlooked and unappreciated. Damn straight. But I also think that dads like that it's unappreciated.

It gives us something to bitch about. Yeah, I think that men do like being martyrs about fatherhood and father's saving. That's true, it's something that. You know, part of it, I mean, don't get me wrong. It's been overwhelmingly good. I wouldn't undo it. I mean, you know, but you just don't know going into it. But I'll tell you what's some, another part,

if you want to get a little bit ragy is, what your kids will do to you, Dick, is. Yeah. They will, they will rig it in your life so that you're going to suddenly be forced to socialize with some assholes that you would never even share a zip code with, okay, and the fact that- It's not a positive.

No, no. This is not a positive, because what happens is your kids will be friend the kids of other folks. Right. And this is actually a function of the time we live in in the geography, okay? When I grew up in New York, no one of you ever fucking played it. What the hell is it? I went out in the street, there were kids there, we played.

I never knew their parents, they didn't know mine. That was it, it was my own little world. That's how it worked. Now, you know, Los Angeles with every quarter hiding a predator and a child molester, everyone must have adults, you know, this is really spawned the fucking helicopter, parents. If you want any rage, I could get on that for a couple of hours. Please, it's a show of rage and science. I covered the science, were you talking about Islam, I think.

These assholes, you know, and so what happens is you find yourself forced really to interface with the parents of your kids' playmates. And most of the time, I'd just, I'd rather be head than talk to them. They're fucking horrible. That's a healthy reaction. Yeah, we had, we did the Halloween thing

last, last Halloween, with a trick-or-treat deal, right, with I-11-year-old, right, some of her friends. Or that's like a new fad. Yeah. Well, here's, this is really, like somebody of the moms and dads, they dress up in costume too. That's fucked.

You know what, you're done. It's the kids turn to play, put your fucking clown costume away, and be a parent. But the side, we're walking along. Well, you're right because it's like it's so much attention away from the kids. It's very supposed to put it to them. Correct.

Oh, man, and I can just imagine the kind of woman, especially in LA, or man, because in LA, you can't tell the difference at the time anyway. I can admit, right? As if they act the same. They say the truth. The same now, man, 10 years ago, I would have said that as As Frank's, they act the same. They do, they act the same now, man. 10 years ago, I would have said that as a joke,

but now I listen to men talk, and I'm like, am I listening to women talking and from a time machine here? What the fuck are you guys talking about? Frank's Apple called a men with women's heads, and he was right, he was dead on right. No. And I can see them getting way too into their costume, like setting up the

whole like Ivan Trap or family or some, a theme that the kid doesn't even know. Sure. Like a dad who's more into superheroes than their kids, forcing the daughter to be a black widow. Yes. She wanted to just be a princess, right? Go ahead. Yeah. Well, you know, it is, I mean, the new zeitgeist almost demands that daddy be a mommy too. And here's, you know, you like to become a dad and they want to hand you a shirt with the tit flaps or something. You know, so you can, you can nurse along with mommy. It's really, it's really sick.

It really is. And these fathers just, they love to assume that role. You know, now at Halloween, we went out with a few other kids whenever in parents and walkings were a really, really fucking wealthy neighborhood in the West Valley. Cheap at the ship box houses are four million bucks. Yeah, good candy, bad candy.

No candy. Apples and shit. Yeah, apples with razors in them. No, so the... So I couldn't believe it's like, you know, there's absolutely zero traffic. You know, there's zero danger. And one of these dads is yelling at his kid, you know, whatever the fuck her name was, Hyoweth or something.

Every time this kid would set foot off a curve, right, or dare to go up to ring a doorbell that he wasn't hovering over here, he would shout, red light, red light, that's not okay. And this kid, like one of Hitler's guard dogs, would fucking freeze. And I mean freeze, until dad gave the green light. And after about three minutes of this, I looked at my daughter and I went, Jackie, green light get your ass in the street, we're outta here. And we were, and they looked like,

they actually, I guess I did verbally bitch-lapped them and I have no regrets. You know, that was the end of that group activity. And suddenly a couple of other kids decided to come along with us and they had the time so the last few years, we let them basically do what the hell they wanted to do. Yeah. Okay? Unsupervised.

Yeah. Pretty much. Well, I bring this in because my brother-in-law has got two sons. Yeah. And man, do they bust his ball? Good. Yeah. He's not only, not only do they bust his balls nonstop. Like he took a toy from one last week. He took a toy from the other one who's like three and a half. Takes a toy, little kids flipping out

and nephew's throwing a big tantrum. And he looks at him like, and like from an action movie and just goes, I'll rip those glasses right off of your face. And I was like, I'm sitting there. I'm just like, I'm like, you just gotta, you deal with this all day. Like I'm, I'm come in and I'm uncle who doesn't care.

Like I let him do whatever they want. I, I talk shit to them. I don't have to like usher them into being grown up people. I just gotta come in and give him a dose of reality. Like here you go, whack, like just have fun. I wind him up like the Tasmanium devil and then I'm out of there, right? Thank you, thank you, Uncle Dick.

Yeah, so this guy, this poor bastard is a great dad. Always there, loves him and I, you know, it's reciprocal, but all they do is bust his chops. And I'm thinking, man, this, you just, maybe Father's Day getting ignored is a step up from just getting your chops busted all the time by this little motherfucker who will never know as much as you.

And I still do it. Like I thought back and I'm like, I remember doing this to my dad. And I still do it. I'm still like, and I see you nodding, Sean. I don't think you ever outgrow that. As long as your parents are alive, especially as long as your father is alive, you'll bust his balls.

Never would do it to mom. Never would do it to mom. No. Mom can say anything and I'm like, yeah, you know, yeah, I get that. Like I internalize and I'm like, you know, that's pretty close. Or I gently say, like, well, you might want to look into, you might want to, you like that Sylvia Brown book, and you might want to look into, it want you like that silvia brown book You might want to look into it's a load of bullshit Get it I got you but dad makes one fuck up one little fuck up a Miss quarter something I'm like hey

Hey there, Daniel. I noticed you missed a little punctuation in that sentence. Oh, please allow me to correct you I just the ultimate the worst I all sons become the worst internet trolls when they're dealing with their fathers. And I think so, like an internet troll is overly pedantic, like overly argumentative. You don't have sons, so I guess you avoided this. I'm sure daughters of their own pains in the asses, but that's how I feel sons treat their fathers.

Yeah. And it's shameful. It's shameful. It's shameful. It's shameful. I feel down every time I do it, but God damn it. I'm gonna do it. I know I'm gonna do it again. You prick. That's why I ask is there what's what's in it for what's in it for dads? Yeah, you need them. Mom builds the machine them mom builds the machine and dad programs it also you know really on the grandest of all scales it's your really your soul shot at at at a because your bloodline will continue on after you, right? And also, you're actually, you're never closer to God when you actually, you know, it's not full creation, but it's pretty damn close.

So if you want to flex your God muscle, become a dad. What does that feel like? Now, I'm really intrigued by that. What the hell is a God muscle? I feel like. Well, you know what? I'll tell you what, I actually, this is, this is, you guys are gonna laugh, but when each of my kids were conceived, I knew.

Really? I did, you knew. And I really talk about, you know, I felt a disturbance in the forest. I knew. We're like right away. Really, like Beckham, when he kicks a shot a disturbance in the forest. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha this vortex from wherever the waiting room is. What did the feeling feel like? I wanna know if I've felt it before. It was almost like hearing distant thunder. But it really was an auditory.

It was like I said, it was a feeling. It was nothing you could perceive with your eyes or ears, of course, but I just, no, you know, it was very. I think this is a dad scam. Like this is a scam that's a dad recruiting misery. Yeah. This is a classic ice-ish recruitment technique. So you're like, oh, you're never gonna get the feeling

of a suicide bomb before you do it. Such a scam. All right. Yeah. Let's question number two. Ready? That's a great answer. Question number two, you are from a generation that was, I think, the last generation that

had fun. That may be true. Sean and I have never had a day of fun in our whole lives. Every day gets worse. Yeah. We used to be in a beautiful studio. Now we're here. Shitty mics and an echo.

It's started at the top and worked my way down. But from this generation, I think you, part of it was that you talk to women, women talk to men, you guys talk to each other all the time. Yes. My wife had that bus to pass. Oh, that's all that stuff. We're gonna cut that out.

What's on word I'm looking for? There's a certain word. It's a professional. Professional. Yeah, we're not it. A defining characteristic of your generation was that women and men talk to each other. Yeah, I guess.

We don't do that anymore. No, no, no, no. We got things like girls' nights, where just the girls go out. We got dudes playing video games. What was, in all these wisdom you have, what is the best pickup line that you ever used? Well, it wasn't a line, really.

If you want to... Got me already. If you want to... Intrigued already? Yeah, because she ever met his agent and then unzipped his pants. There you go. If you can stand on your wallet

and suddenly be looking down at them from a great height, that might, that's kind of something we get through attention. But... How would you do that? No, that's a good point, because that's why I wear a watch. That's why I wear an expensive watch. Girls come up say like, wow, what's what's going on here?

We can't see it. Can I touch it? Yeah. Yeah. Well outside of that though, if you really, I mean, if you always got to sort of get to the, you know, the essence of of any of any question. And really, um, most women when they when they look at you, they're really thinking of a gene pool and a means to an end. And that end is, they want to reproduce. Okay. Okay. And that baby will come to mean so much more to them than you in a very short period of time. Because it's an asshole to you.

That's right. Yeah. And so you want to, you really, the ultimate chick magnet is an infant child. And if you can't get one of those Get a get a freaking puppy Yeah, you know what if you can borrow a kid or rent a kid great and I'll tell you what you know This is a tip for your your single, you know, dude listeners. Okay We just got a dogry it was a foster dog It was a it was a it was a rescue dog? But the deal was you had two weeks to say,

I don't like this much in return. Yeah, nobody ever does. No, of course not. Especially with kids. I love what I know somebody who did return a foster. Do you really? Yeah, I really liked it. Actually, I do too.

It was too much work. Too much work. Yeah, I had to wake up and take care of it every day. Yeah, they are work. So if I was a single dude, man, I would be getting a new foster dog every, you know, several weeks. But what about the infant? You said infant. That's number one. And nothing, nothing trumps a live human baby for attracting chicks.

Oh, can I, that's, I swear to God. You know, you put it, you go to a mall with it, with a kid in a stroller and you will be surrounded. Did you have to say live? Yeah, with a baby the big ones, yeah. We're a human baby. Yeah, you know, and it's- In a jarne of formalities. I know, that's all fires in me there. That one's human, live. I've done this though.

Like I watched the boys. Okay. And this man does not work. Like I'll put up a picture of me with a puppy on Facebook. Boom. Hundreds of likes. Boom. Chicks asking about the dog. I put up a picture of me and a kid on Facebook. It's a fucking ghost town.

Really? No, nobody. I mean, nobody. I really? Yeah. I walk around with the kid and I get the, I get the cold shoulder from women. And I thought what you were saying was going to happen. Like, oh, dogs are, dogs are kryptonite. This, this, the baby must be, you know, the silver bullet. The baby's must, the baby's going to get these brats so juiced up with these hormones going on. Sure.

Ooh, baby, right? Yeah, yeah. Opposite. What was wrong with that kid? He's, he hormones going. Sure. Ooh, baby, right? Yeah, yeah. Opposite. What was wrong with that kid? He's perfect. I'm kidding. But you're right, there's something must be wrong with the kid,

because there's nothing wrong with me. No, the damn right. Well, actually, maybe that's, yeah, maybe those women were not looking to reproduce with me. Maybe. Maybe. That could be part of it. those women were not looking to reproduce with me. That could be part of it. Yeah, so I guess, let me know how that works for you. Okay, this is my, this is the question every co-host gets. What makes you a rage?

You mean a-rager-in-raged. Why is everybody got a problem with that question with the phrasing of it? I mean a rage is a noun I'm thinking, you know, the fucking thing in a desert with the, you know, the ecstasy like the incredible Hulk like rage that makes you a rage like when you get upset like, Hey, or if you tell like a joke, you made a funny. Yeah, what makes you a rage? Basically any any any form of bullshit, you know, you made a funny. What makes you a rage? Basically any form of bullshit, you reach a certain point in life where your bullshit detector becomes almost flawless

and your tolerance goes down. It really does. You put up a lot more bullshit as a kid. For sure. You really do. And it's probably because you seek it out. Yeah, you want to see it out. That's right. That's right. And then stories. Yeah, and then a lot of time. That's a good point. I mean, you when you're a kid, you're into fairy tales. You start out with, you know,

the the cow flew over the moon. Yeah, you want tales of superheroes, but man, as you get older, that shit just means nothing. I get mean so much less and less and less every year. You want and you demand truth in everything. Yeah. And when you get bullshit at any level, you go nuts. I mean, that's what it arranges me. Somebody trying to zoom me will really piss me off.

Sorry. Somebody trying to zoom me will really piss me off. Sorry somebody trying to zoom me to bullshit Zoom zoom that that was the parlance back east for Somebody laying a line. That's cool. Hey, man. Don't zoom me. I'm a reethers on who zoom in who who zoom in? So how do people to what's what kind of bullshit are you getting? Bullshit I get from you know, God, you know, you just get it everywhere. You know, from teachers of my kids, you know, every time I turn the TV and see something political and other fucking politician, they're all liars, they all bullshit, every one of them. You know, there's a, I think that's probably, if you were to extract all of academia and government bureaucrats,

the level of bullshit in this nation would drop to almost negligible. If you were to extract, there is such a source of bullshit combined. And so much so that there are times when I will almost go into media ingestion shut down for several days because I figured I'm going to have to. I can't take it. You can't take it. You just have to fucking tune out. And so there's no computer.

Everything's. That's interesting. You see that there was a study recently or a data point. to and out. And so there's no computer or the phone, everything's, you know, that's interesting. You say there was a, there was a study recently or a data point, I don't even call it a study that the, the suicide rates for men were, were jumping up inexplicably. Like it's in the middle of a recession. Yeah. It's not, you'd expect like, you lose money, guys start killing themselves. But it's not really changing.

Well, you know what? I think that's part and parcel with the entire, sort of the feminization of our culture, right? I've never heard about this going on. And look at, look at, look at the, yeah, you've never, you've seen, it's alien to you. Right. And look at the workforce. Okay, you look at guys 50 60 years ago right when when when United States was an a force of industry when we actually made things

Right and how it's good feeling yeah damn right and so what you know think about it What are women women most of most of what women like to build? You know, I'm sorry Marissa Myers of Yahoo, but this is how I see it. It's kind of temporary. I mean, it shakes like, you know, floral arrangements. I don't give a fuck about the flowers. I put them in the vase. You know, they're going to be dead. What's the point? What's the point? You know, they're into sort of temporary things. Guys like to achieve something that they can stand back and look at, you know, whether it's pyramids or sphinxes or, or blowing up in island.

You know, it's, they want quantifiable results. What guys get that kind of fulfillment in their work anymore? You know, what is a customer service rep tapping a fucking keyboard somewhere in a cubicle? What kind of fulfillment are they gonna get at a customer service level where everything is temporary, where you know, your first response for,

why, what's in it for me as a dad was in mortality. And there is nothing, there is nothing to be proud of. I don't think, I mean, like I didn't feel proud of helping someone bitch about their internet. You can't contribute to a real thing anymore. Everything is every single thing that's being worked on just kind of seems like bullshit. It is. Like, you're making an app.

An app that's built to be replaced in six months or maybe it'll never even see the light of day. There's some cool stuff being worked like the, the, the, the space X projects, the, the, the, uh, hyper loop, like it seems cool, but it's, it seems and feels like a pipe dream. Like you're not in there making a thing that someone's going to use for 20 years. Sure. Uh, yeah. So I think you get a great point there. So and then, you know, the fun quotient is just plummeted. You know, what do you mean the fun quotient? Well, I saw a story last week saying that college students are having less sex than ever before. They're drinking less than ever before. They're drinking what the fuck is college for if not to get laid and drunk?

Okay, what's wrong with that picture? Everything and it's it's the encroaching, you know, the nanny state the political correctness. I mean it sounds like a cult This is like that's what you do in a cult You don't have any you don't know. No fun. Any of your human desires you go to college and you get indoctrinated And is the drinking and the sex go down the more go to college and you get indoctrinated. And is the drinking and the sex go down? Yeah. The more receptive to crazy ideas you are.

Yeah. So I don't want to get laid and get loaded by you. You want to find a safe space where I won't be offended by anything. Yeah. Ever. Okay. Yeah. You have a tough time in life. Oh, yeah.

This planet ain't safe, no. You have a tough time in life. Oh yeah, we're in. This planet ain't safe, baby. I mean, you got kids, man. How do you keep them safe from college? But you gotta send your kids to college, right? Of course. Well, how do you, what the fuck do you do? They're going right into the lion's dead.

Yeah, you know what? I mean, life is a terminal proposition. As an uncle of mine said, you know, years before I ever had a kid, he said, when you have a kid, you are handing a hostage to fate and it's fucking true. Okay, you can only take them so far and protect them so much, but at one point, you know, they're off on their own. So that's just how it works. And, you know, I would hope that my kids are going to have a few laughs along the way and accomplish something and not make apps for a living

that do customer service. All right, well, you got any, you got any dick tips? Of course. But it may sound like you're full of them before you had a shit load so far, but you got any real one specifically you want to tell everybody about? Absolutely.

Don't eat fried food. Don't eat fried food? Were you just talking about how much fun we got to have? And fried food is the first time the chopping block? No, no, no, that was just, there's a silly tip. Well, if you give me a, you know, if you can narrow the field a little bit, I'll probably come up with dozens, but it's like, it's like, you know, the menu at Jerry's deli.

Well, what's helped you most it, go ahead. It's going to say like a dick tip would be like some fatherly advice like never jerk off in the shower otherwise you'll get a bone or every time it rains. Oh yeah. I'll go along with that. Sean that works. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Doesn't have to be disgusting like Sean. Yeah, it doesn't have to be so blue and grass. It's really. Sean, with your joke, with your singers, nobody's obscene singers, nobody's listening. Nobody's listening. It's like any general dick. Any general dick tips.

We'll tell you. Here's mine. Here it is. Here it is for you. Here's the tip. If I was Elvis, who was one of my heroes, Elvis, he had custom made for his crew, for his guys, little sort of like. TCB.

TCB. Necklace that said taking care of business and lighting bolts. You're a huge Elvis fan. You're a huge Elvis fan. Well, I would amend that a bit, Dick. And my necklaces for my crew would be TNS. Standing for. Take no standing for take no shit

That's it because you if you do you always fucking regret it always you know, yeah, and so so just don't you know There's no reason to put up with it. Don't take any shit your boss gives you shit. You say fuck you. I quit Fuck you the bank gets as you got to pay more. You say fuck you I don't need this house. Your parents try to help you out pay you pay some rent so you can say fuck you. Okay. Sure. I'll take that. Yeah, but you got to start looking for a job. You know what mom fuck you. I don't need your basement. I'm out of here. I like it. It's a park bench of my name on it right over there. Laurel and Santa Monica. All right, Larry, thanks for stopping by. Thanks for having me reviewing.

I hope it goes well. This has been a blast, man. It has been a blast. For everybody who was on the Hangout and watching this show. Yes. Thank you, thank you for donating. Thank you.

I apologize for the crudity of the video. I apologize for the poor quality, but you've got to understand what happened. And this is what makes me a rage. It is. Okay, this is what happened. I had to go to I had to go out of town suddenly last week. I might get into it next episode, but I had to go out of town suddenly. And what happened was everybody was in on the show, on the dick show.

I put the dick show up. I worked for 24 hours getting, what is that? How is that? It's like a fucking horse. That's gone now. The horse is loose. The horse gets loose in the halls here Pegasus is here. Yes 24 hours get I got the dick show up it was lit so so the biggest problem ended yeah on a Tuesday

Right, and it was it was a mad dash to get the new show going right and I spent like you do I spent six days agonizing over That we should gotta stop for that sound right? I think it's just water. It's just a pipe of water. Yeah. I spent six days a bit deal Yeah, no big that I spent six days agonizing over what to call the show right and I've be like a show like That I ended up with the dick show. Yeah, obviously took six days to come up with. And it was worth it.

Every minute. Every minute. So that day, I'm at a Mad Dash, Sean and I, on a Mad Dash to get this show up on time under budget, right? You know how a show like this, a podcast like this, there's just a million things you got to do, right? Maybe 12, but that's a lot. That's way too much for a person to do.

Yes. In 24 hours. Oh, yeah. So I throw it up there. Boom, first episode. Bam, people are into it. Comments start pouring in, right? Patreons start pouring in.

People are signing up because they want this content, right? They can't live without dick. They need more dick. They want to pay for dick, right? So I'm like, I love it. We're going to do something awesome with the show. We're going to we're going to do things that we've only dreamed of when the other show, right? Let's get this fucking thing going. Let's get this video chat going. I go on Amazon boom. As I got, as I get pulled out of town, right? I go on Amazon boom, ordering mics, ordering USB mics, boom, ordering cameras, ordering video cameras, right?

Same day shipping, Bing, Bing, boom, got somebody coming over to the house to check it out, right? All this stuff comes in, like Santa comes to my door, drops off all this equipment, right? Yeah. So I come back on Sunday and I'm going through all this stuff, and I'm like, hey, where's the video cameras though? This is great, I got pop filters, I got some mics, I got some stands, I got some tripods,

I got a USB extender, but where's the cameras? Cameras is the most important part, right? This is the people want the live feed, they want to interact, right? They want to see my beautiful man bun, right? This is a people want to live feed. They want to interact, right? They want to see my beautiful man bun, right? Where's the video cameras? I go on Amazon, track it, delivered. Ooh.

Ah, that's not a good sign. I could. Call everybody. I call the handyman. Hey, you seen anything? You seen any packages by my door? Because all the other packages are there. Call the door? Because all the other packages are there. Call the building manager.

All the other packages are there. Call my neighbors. All the other packages are there. I drill down to the actual tracking website on track. I put in the tracking number there and it says, you know, alpha delivery delivered, like the tracker commonly does. And then in the little comments on on the delivery,

it says left in front grass. Oh, good. Now, just so everyone understands what I'm dealing with here, the level of incompetence and idiocy I'm dealing with here. My apartment is like a fortress. It is, it is rock solid, man. Doors are made out of iron. I got multiple fences between me and the rest of the world. Like if zombie apocalypse, I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm boarding up the doors. And I'm getting the chicks into my apartment. Right. And then I'm boarding that shut and I'll be safe forever. As I'll go up and down, you know, pilfering food and whatever. There's a lot of dogs in my building.

I'll eat all the dogs. I got it all planned out. I'll get all coked up and go to each, every big dog, steal the dog. That means necessary. This is zombie apocalypse. Everything goes. Point is it's safe.

My building is very extremely safe. Except, except for the giant patch of grass in front of the building that is basically sitting out on Hollywood Boulevard. So this idiot took $300 of camera equipment that had to be delivered two day, same day, and decided, well, I'm not gonna call this guy on the call box. I'm just gonna throw it over the fence. That's just as good.

I've accomplished just as much that this is what I'm getting paid for. Like when I go to get my check at the end of the week, I feel totally comfortable knowing that I did a good job by instead of just dialing this guy's name on the call box where he can ring me in from wherever. Anywhere in the world, it goes to my phone, I can ring him in and he could go up into my fortress, my parapet of an apartment and drop it at the door.

He just figures, fuck it, I'm gonna lob it over the fence. Because it's the door, he just figures, fuck it, I'm gonna lob it over the fence, because it's the only grass there is. Let's find him and grot him. Yeah. So thanks, OnTrack. Everybody who saw the video, anybody who had a problem with the sound,

I'm sorry, OnTrack fucked me. That's my story. You got anything to plug? Larry? Yeah, yeah, get my book. Mac Daddy, mastering fatherhood without losing your style, your cool or your mind. Hey, you know what?

And Amazon. That's a good present for new fathers. Damn right. You want to do it right and not be a whosified daddy? Get that book. Yeah, good, good tip. That should have been your tip by my book, right? My book, baby. All right, everybody. Here's the thank you to all the patrons. Thank you

for everybody who watched the live stream. If you want to vote for Larry Blidener, go to thedickshow.com and Motherfucker. Walk down to the... Well, the dogs love me. That's clear. I think there's a pomeranian. If you want to vote for Larry Blidener, go to thedickshow.com and tell us if he is a rage. Can you still hear that fucking dog? Yeah. Yeah, I love it.

I love it. It's being neutered right now. I wish you won't come home soon. I wish you won't come home soon. All right, if you want to vote for Larry Blidener, all right. I got to the fucking dog. Head to thedickshow.com and tell us if you think Larry Do you want to vote for Larry Blightner? Uh. Ha ha ha ha. God of the fucking dogs.

Head to the Dickshow.com and tell us if you think Larry is a rage or not. I'm voting yes Larry. I got a good feeling about you. I'm sorry. He's just, he's really subtle about it. Yeah. Yeah. That's the scary kind of rage.

Exactly. Like no country for old men, Javier Bardem. Let me, let me look at your forehead with this thing your yes cattle bull yes his is invoiced me last week's show hey good you dirty mother fucker uh... you know all i want to do right now since you're basically

fucking bolder mark is you know shit all over my dot that's what it's important to put fuck that i'm not gonna do that i just wanted to call in and say fucking congratulations on the first episode your fucking awesome but i wanted to throw a fucking wrench in the works for a moment you know a legra was great and everything on the first episode but fuck her fuck voice for his coconut what about your audience

as fucking co-hosts um what about fucking butt santa's what about dr. smooth rod what about me you or fuck voice for his coconut. What about your audience as fucking co-hosts? What about fucking butt Sanchez? What about Dr. Smooth Rod? What about me, you motherfucker? So I think that's the best idea. You're gonna fucking world. So, I think you're fucking audience on the show, man. I know that's creepy as fuck,

but that would be fucking... I was in creepy until he said it. I don't know about your stuff. That's the thing with creepy. Don't ever say it. I'm not trying to be. That's the thing with creepy, don't ever say it. I'm not trying to be creepy, but is not a good pick up line. Yeah, otherwise it's the other person's fault

for thinking it's creepy. Yes, no one wants to be the one deciding it's creepy. When you open the door, you're letting them think it's creepy. Plus, I think you just granted his request, didn't you? He's on the air. Yeah, no, I totally want to get these guys on the show. I want to have a call-in show, but clearly I couldn't even set up a fucking video camera.

There's another one. I think everybody's gone. Hey, Diko, you lost a couple of man points this week. Number one, you let the chick tell you what the weather was going to be like if like when you're dry. Oh, true. Number two, you were offered a tumbler of sketch and you were grossed out by it.

How else do you drink sketch? Anyways, but I'm gonna show you. Bye bye. Not a, like, okay. Tumbler is a low-wide glass, is it not? Well, I meant like a spaghetti jar. I was pretty loaded at the time, right? So what?

Yes, but this woman served me like 12 ounces of sketch in a spaghetti jar. You're already loaded at the time, right? So what? Yes, but this woman served me like 12 ounces of scotch in a spaghetti jar. And that's disgusting. Like that is a disgusting amount. Imagine a beer can full of scotch. You don't want to drink that. Is a shot, a single shot? Not enough. Because you can't get the whole scotch experience.

Can't get it into your nose. It doesn't fill up your head and push all your troubles away, right? You need a glass that you can sink your nose and your teeth into, right? Spaghetti jar? Disgusting. Was there like spaghetti and sauce, a fluvia mixed in everything, Scotch or...?

I wish there was, I don't want to drink it. All right, this has been Dick Masterson. See you next Tuesday. Is that thing? Dic? Dic? Dic? Dic?

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