The Dick Show - Episode 203 - Dick on Mad Libs

Episode Date: April 21, 2020

Power buttons that correct you, living the Adult Baby Diaper Lifestyle, California fills up a skate park, Frank Hassel works out and drops hotdogs, the Final Fantasy 7 remake, entertaining Anthony Cumia, Chris Hansen congratulates me and my garbages, tyranny comes from next door, Bam Bam's Easter Madlibs, how to find your broken half, and helping Kiwi Chris make a hooker his housewife; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Gosh, we've got some, I really hope the diaper guy calls in today. Oh, it is. I've got everything crossed that can be crossed on me. I know he said he would. My balls are crossed. You know, it's horrible. But, you know, we did the carol who were these podcasts crossed over last week, where we reviewed so fun.

That was so fun. People are demanding that you do all of them now. Really? Yeah, they demanded and they implied that it wouldn't be good without you. They always, they don't just love you guys. I love you guys. Oh, man. I was losing back.

I was like, I'm kind of on fire on this one. Oh, yeah, you were real on fire. I'm out of the house. I think that is part of it. Yeah, I'm hyped up when I get over here, I think. Randy came over and he started rooting around in my garage for tools and like doing a bunch of bullshit that he's like brought over arts and craft.

Really? Yeah. People are saying, this audience always has, they don't just compliment you right out like that was great. Good content. Thanks. It's always backhand you every single fucking time.

Like I think having one kid would be easy after dealing with, after dealing with 40,000 teenage men who are trying to, who are trying to chili pepper you constantly with, oh yeah, I'm glad Sean, Sean really made this work finally. Oh God. Okay. Thanks.

I listened to one of your other ones, and as I, as I mix, here's another one. No, it was funny. No, it was really funny. I was like, shit, I gotta start listening to to this show and you know, I'll be like yeah I got to do that and then I'll be then I'll be on my deathbed I go you know what I really should have done that yeah, but I it was no The point was was the show was funny. Yeah, what are you gonna wish you had done your deathbed? Oh

God, I mean how much time do you have like a couple seconds? Couple seconds. Yeah. I'll probably wish that I had... No, I've pretty much done everything that I thought I was gonna do. Okay. Good for you. It's like, how am I gonna save this? Good for you. All right, everybody let's start this show Live from Mount bunker deep in the heart of the city of failure, I'm your hosting, Matcheson.

Okay, the $20 million man, voted America's worst Mexican, 53 weeks running, joining me is always this world touring LA-based comedian, Sean the audio engineer. Hello dick. What's up buddy? Yeah, you know.

We're back, we're back again. Lockdown day! Back again, then. So I've been doing those piano, Twitch streams, and like every day. Um, every other day. Four, three, four times a week,

if I don't, there's the right mix, right mix of like hungover and wanting to drink again, you know, I use it as an excuse for alcoholism. Yeah. So every time I've been doing it, I've been changing the quarantine day number. Just because I started, I started that as a joke on day one thinking like, oh, this is cute, right?

Quarantine day one, like we're in prison, right? Yeah, now it's, what I did was like day 32. Yeah. It's like, oh, wow. This has really gotten out of control. Like the most depressing captain's log ever. Yeah. Just a slow, curtsy and descent into madness. Yeah. Like day after day after day after day. Oh my God. Kertz, Puckleps know. Yes. Oh, that's a reference. Wow. 32. Welcome today. And by the time this comes out, I guess it'll be 37 or some 34, 35, 34 in the 30s. In the 30s. But really, I miss my 30s. After 32, after no shit. As soon as when the quarantine passes 39, that's what I'm going to start getting really depressed.

God, I would give, I would give just about anything to be 32 again. Again, I'll say 40s are just like the age of irrelevance. There's nothing good about them. I defy anybody. They say, oh, you know, 40's the new 30. It's like, yeah! 40's fucking 40. It was 40, 100 years ago, it's fucking 40 now.

We got a lot of content out this week. I don't know, you were probably aware of that, Sean. I did a Ralph, a bonus Ralph episode yesterday. Yeah, yeah. I don't know Ralph for his patrons says a bonus episode every month. So I can wait on his Ralph Fasod yesterday? Yeah, yeah. I don't know Ralph for his patrons says a bonus episode every month. So I can win on his and I'm gonna put it

on the Dixho Patreon when we're done today. We just talked about Bojack Horseman for an hour and a half with Vito. That's what I, yeah. And I'm behind Bojack Horseman, so I didn't listen to it. Oh, you didn't? No, because you're like,

you're like, just run it through the mix. You know, run it through the chain and sit there, don't edit, don you're like, you're like, dude, just, just run it through the, the mix, you know, run it through the chain and, and sit there, don't edit, don't anything. So I was like, okay, good. Now I don't have to listen to this. It was fun for me, because you, you pretty much have two alcoholics talking about themselves for an hour. Oh, yeah. It's a, a peel of the show. Sure. Well, yeah, but Bojack makes you do that. It does. It does, because it's a fucking, it's a fucking heavy show. It is a heavy show. Well, you can go listen to it again. My point in the end was I wanted two endings. I wanted two different endings about Jack Horseman.

I don't know the ending. Well, I'll just tell you. Don't tell me. I wanted an ending where he's not drinking and I wanted an ending where he is drinking. Okay. They owedys two different endings. Got you. One with liquor and one with no liquor. All right. Cause one would have gone very differently

and would have been satisfying to me. And if you want to know what, if you want to know, if you want to know the details of exactly why I think so, go ahead and listen to this. Like I'm plugging my phones right now. Oh, quarantine day 33. You know, so go to patreon.com slash the Dixho,

if you want to hear more of that. There's also the Carl, who are these podcasts crossover. We did another additional bonus episode of that. Check it out. Some chick hit me up on Instagram saying that her and her boyfriend listened to the show. They didn't even know you could get video on the Patreon. Oh, damn.

And I said, fuck, have I really, I really just don't plug it. No, I know, I think we, I just kind of assume that people know or that people tell other people. Yeah, but people are idiots. You can't assume anything. No, I know.

No, I'm joking, I'm just teasing everybody. So you can get the video of the show. I also did a pain killer at the PKA show. Oh, you've been busy. This week. I guess what are you gonna do, right? Exactly. What are you gonna do?

This is you. Someone said you've sure been arguing on the internet a lot. I'm like, well, you want me to go argue with my girlfriend? Because that has repercussions. Yes, I just turn off the screen when I'm done. Right. And do other, you know. People are doing all kinds of these meetups

and all this, you know, people are, it kinds of these meetups and all that say, you know, people are, it's like everybody is trying their best to socialize, I guess, and yeah. So it's like, it doesn't, it doesn't surprise me that you're on the internet all the time or arguing on the internet or doing streams or whatever, because it's like,

Randy and Keon came over. There is a noticeable decline in social skills. Really? Yeah, what do they do? I don't really know how to have a party. I don't know, do I, how do I talk to two people at the same time? You or that?

Everybody. Well, me, I only speak for myself, but like, I was very confused. I was like, oh, where's my phone? I gotta get out of this. I need to just text you guys. Yeah. I was on the P.K.A. show with Anthony Cumia.

Oh, yeah. The Opian and Shrish girl. Sure. World famous legendary broadcaster. I mean, you know what, was he the one who went off on that like racist tirade? I mean, racist. I call somebody a savage, they happened to be black.

They were acting, they were seriously acting in a way that I would not act like in the middle of the street and they seem to have no shame about it. Was he like, yeah. I remember that I got fired for that I think. Yeah, it was just like out of, I was like, oh damn man, he went for it. Yeah. If I remember exactly, I remember being like, oh damn, I'm surprised a guy like an entertainment

that long went for that like that. That was my, I don't remember exactly, but that was my kind of gut reaction. I was like, damn. Wow. What the hell is that? What's he up to? Oh, Chris, the Kiwi wants to call in at some point today. Yeah, I mean, he's got his own little network.

He was on there. He called in from his house. He's got some kind of a home studio. But it was cool. That show, the PKA show has a lot of big swing and dicks on it. You know, it's hard to really get a comment in Edgewise, right in this show, because it's all remote,

so it's always very difficult. With a lag and stuff. Yeah, if you don't know the, if you don't know the, like the cadence of somebody you're talking to all the time, like if it's not somebody you're talking to all the time, you're not stepping on each other and like, it's gotta be in the room.

You gotta be in the room to have any kind of life in your show. So my rule of being a guest on shows, you just never interrupt the bigger guests, right? Anthony Cumi is here, this is Anthony Cumi. He's got stories to tell. Well, that's a good guy. I'm trying to make stories, he's got stories to tell.

I have to say, that's one thing that I notice that Joe Rogan does incredibly well because he will let somebody go and go and then like a three word prompt. And then they'll go. It's really, it's hard to do. Having had so many people guests come on this show, what I notice, the criticism of people of people who come sit in the studio is that they interrupt the callers too much. So whenever I go on other people's show and if they have a Gaston, if I'm just like a sidekick there,

try to never interrupt. So we talk to Anthony Cumea for an hour, and then they set me up for my coronavirus hot takes, my material, right? Here we go. You can say. And he lives in New York, right? He's like, okay, here we go.

Which is, yeah, I've ground zero. I'm going the way that round. Which is the only city that's affected in America by this play. I mean, I wouldn't say that, but it's like, it's so much worse. It's the prediction's been true in New York. It's so much worse.

So I go in, I commit fully to it, and he's cracking up the whole time, which is very rewarding for me to get that guy to laugh. It's hard to make comedians laugh. Yeah. So yeah, yeah, you got you got Kumi and you got Bill Burr. Yeah. So it's probably some other ones.

So you get a smile. I got a laugh at a billbird too. You did. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You did. That's why they call me a comedian's comedian. I don't know if you've heard that, Sean.

Right. That's how people describe you are You're a comedian's comedian. Like, yeah. Let me see what else I have here. Like Mitch Hedberg was a comedian's comedian. I'm funnier than him. They all love that guy. No, McDonald's a comedian's comedian.

They filled up a skate park with sand. Did you see that? Oh, you didn't see that? The skate park with sand. Why? God, oh, so they could why so they couldn't agree in there. See this. I get it. Hold on. Uh, skate park. Obviously, this is huge. This is an iconic picture. Skate park filled with sand. This is like Tienem and Square level of iconic. Here is the bulldozer. People standing in front of tanks and then... I mean, I really think it is because it says so much

in this one picture, a skate park. Damn. And Venet and San Clemente, a skate park that is entirely desolate in the middle of a beach that is also desolate and the backdrop is an entire ocean that is completely desolated. And we have one man who is, I think several orders of magnitude worse than Hitler, this guy.

I mean, history will probably show that's true. I don't think it will. That's what makes me so arraige about it. Oh, gotcha. I'm, we're still arguing. This is if it's real. No, a man who is taking a bulldozer, the government is doing this. And is filling in a skate park with sand

so that it cannot be used, right? And then they'll say we're gonna reopen the skate park, but taxes are gonna go up. Yeah, we've got some asshole filled this up with sand. So we've got a, not a sign, like not a sign there to say not use it. But they, like this is the thought process of this animal that we're trying to save. Let me ask you a quick, go ahead.

Where people like gathering their day after day after day and they were like, does it matter? Would that change it? Well, I mean, to fill it with sand with the bow. I would go, there should be intermediary steps. If you sign, let's start with a sign. Start with that, and then if not, I'm sure you can, I'm sure you can hire a security guard. Oh, I mean, like, you know, that's, that guy could get sick.

Sean, that, well, he probably won't, if he takes the proper precautions. Oh, right. He probably won't. Now, we got Philo Sand. Yeah, because you got Philo Sand. One security guard, it's not, the chances of them like beating the shit out of that guy

and then skating the rest of the day are very, very low. Right. So pulling it up on the feed so everybody. I would say that is excessive. Oh, you would. I would. It's beautiful. It's such a beautiful, it's such,

it's just such an evocative image to me. This isn't the best one either. There's a better one where you can see the entire breadth of the skate park and the bulldozer just all on its own. It's like the Tieneman square massacre shot, right? One dude against an empire. Yeah. Okay. And that says so much about the, the context of that time, right? The struggles that they were, that they thought they were dealing with it anyway. And here we have one man against a skater. One fat, stupid, minimum wage retarded person. Like this is, I mean, this is the scum of the earth.

This guy probably didn't even get a bonus for doing this. For going to the bulldozer store, getting his bulldozer, getting his $10 million piece of construction equipment, and voluntarily filling up a part that symbolizes the coming together of many cultures, like the improvements we've made in accepting a different culture of the skater culture. Remember everybody, when we were kids, everybody bitch, he's fucking skaters or he's fucking skaters.

And then it's like somebody was like, hey, it probably wouldn't cost that much to build them skate parks. They work amazing. And they go to skate, what do you know? They go to skate parks. Like not treating children and teenagers like criminals because they're expressing themselves. This skateboarding is not a crime, stickers, right?

Like when we were kids, it's like, we just want to skate. They built that and they skate. And then the response is one guy, one guy who probably drinks monster energy drinks, who probably watches the voice and thinks it's good. Maybe he teavows it. This is the man who's driving.

Half the audience is going, what the hell's a teavo? Yeah, all right. Filling it up, just destroying this monument, because this is the imagery. It is the imagery of the idi the, it is the, it's the imagery of the idiochrosy, a guy filling up. And the worst thing is, is, you know, like knock it down too, right? The walls. I don't think so now. Just filled it up with some. So they'll like, they'll dig it out at some point and not, not getting Tony Hawk to say, like, hey, guys, don't,

I mean, forget, forget the fucking science. Everybody knows what I think about it. And tons of new shit, science is coming out, agreeing with what I'm saying. But this is, this is the monument to our culture. A man, and you know, the worst part, the things that makes me rage about it, is no one will give this guy any shit, even though he is, even though he is 100 pedophiles in one. This is because he's a worse man. Not gonna bunch of skater kids. Because all you, because the real source of tyranny as I think we've all come to see during this,

here I love it, he's dick is bringing us all along for the ride, we just, he's assuming everyone agrees with what he's about to say. I don't care. In fact, I know people don't. I know people don't. And but they will feel even more because I'm so stupid. And because I drink so much, they'll feel even more correct. They'll feel even more correct. Sure, sure. That guy's an idiot. He listened to what he's saying. I knew I was right,

because it is degenerate. I'm going to go online and talk about how trad wives are so much better. Isn't that the case with fucking with everything though? Like people are holding on to like their beliefs no matter how stupid they are, like tighter than ever. Mm-hmm. Anyway, can somebody ask me why? Continue with your ass and I in statement. You're forthcoming in, so that's gonna say.

Sorry, I don't have fucking fucking interrupt me. I know, I did. I derailed you. No, oh yeah, hundred pedophiles in one. It's this continuing, the continuing Nazi defense. Well, you know, he's just like, just doing his job. The tyranny, the tyranny that we're all under right now

does not come from the government. I've seen a lot of retarded people express the idea of like, oh, you got to rise up. You got to rise up. It's, I'm not, you would be rising up against your neighbor. The people that are reporting you. No, no, no. The police live right across the street. Sure.

It's the tyranny comes from next door. It doesn't come from the government. The government's just struggling to keep up with it because you've got a mob of insane people. It's the, it's that fear is a large, is a heavy motivator. And so is the fear of looking wrong. Yeah, which is driving this. Yeah. Uh oh. Uh oh. This isn't, it's not happening the way we thought. Uh, uh, people are going to start, we better do more things or else people are

going to start to think we were wrong. Well, you know, I mean, new sum was on last week and they're talking about they're like, okay, we're starting, we're looking at ways where we can start easing back into things. So clearly they, yeah, they think that, well, I mean, you know, not right away, but restaurants reopening with more space in between gloves and masks, you know, that kind of stuff. But like, so it's like, it makes me, and immediately, because you know, I go to and from the studio on a lot of days, which is the only other thing keeping me sane

between this, the podcast and the studio. Yeah. Immediately after that, I started to see about double the amount of cars on the road. Yeah, meaning like everybody's like, well the worst is behind us. Well, or the cars were already, here's the video of the skate park getting filled in,

or the cars you're going, what do you want, what do you want this guy to do? Not do this. Not do this. All I want. Now, what if they say, all right, you're fired. Yeah. Yeah.

That's what I want. Because that's what, I'm sorry. That's not only is that what I want, but that's the difference between good and evil. Is that no matter what, everyone will just do it. It's that this guy who did this should get the entire focus of everyone's anger because all it takes is for that one guy to just keep saying no. Got your fire next guy.

No. Yeah. Next guy. No. There's going to be somebody who says yes very early on and that's why. Yeah. I mean, there should be there should be no greater fear than doing what this guy is doing now, but there's not, but well, but there's not where it's yeah, fear is a it's the Nazi defense.

There's always going to be it's the you always have to like the lowest, you know, like I don't know if it's I don't know if Lois common denominator is like the correct is a correct usage in this case, but it's like somebody is going to be There's going to be a group or some people who are more scared than the majority, than everybody else. And they're the ones who are gonna say yes. Here's another one. No matter how crazy things get, stuff crazier than that. Here's another one for you. The who, the World Health Organization,

pop this one out last week. Alcohol does not protect against COVID. Access should be restricted during last week. Oh, whoa. You gotta, oh, that's the problem. Access should be restricted. Access should be restricted. Yeah, it doesn't mean like, look, access should be restricted.

It said they wrote this. Yeah, what are they're fucking sighted? Let's read the read the read the read the international. Should we see the rest of it? Outlaw. Oh, you think they explained that? Reasonably. Yeah, outlaw is known to be harmful to health and general.

Yeah, yeah, so we know that. Should be restricted to that. And encourages governments to enforce measures which limit alcohol consumption. That's wrong. That's just wrong. That's wrong. Yeah, absolutely. I feel like Javier Bardem in no country for old me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. If the thinking is what got you here, and the coin is here, what difference does the thinking make? Yeah. Yeah. Busting myths on out. Why did that's very unprofessional? Restricting alcohol access. Alcohol is responsible for three million deaths worldwide. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's a lot of deaths. I mean, wow. During the pandemic, we should really ask that. That's not're fucking place to say that kind of shit. Like literally is.

There's a world health organization. No, no, I mean, it's poison. It are encouraging. No, no, encouraging governments to limit the, how many, how many deaths of governments been responsible for who you want to throw that one? Billions. Yeah. I mean, in the course of billions, of course.

Yeah. We all know the big ones. Yeah. You know, yeah, which are which are pot right? Stalin right George W. Bush. I'm sure there's another bad one. I'm forgetting but maybe but he's been covered oh Yeah During lockdown we should really ask ourselves what risks we are taking and leaving people under lockdown in their homes with a substance that is harmful in both terms of their health and the effects of their behavior on others, including violence,

says, country, constean, program manager of alcohol and the illicit drugs program for the who. You're up. I don't know. I don't know. I think you better put me in charge for the next one. People are gonna lose their liquor. I also, I saw that remember about three or four weeks ago when they asked that guy about Taiwan or whatever. Yeah, he saw that. And China, it was worse than you made it sound. Oh yeah, it was worse.

It was, I do these, okay, look, do these people, it's the health organization, right? Do these people, why aren't they media trained when it comes to a question like that? That's such an obvious answer. It's like, that's beyond, I'll tell you what, that is beyond the purview of what I'm here to do. That is a political issue. I'm not here to comment on political issues.

I'm here to understand and help protect against coronavirus. Yeah. Next question, please. Very, very simple answer. Are you sure? And so this guy, first he didn't hear it. And then he said, he said, he hung up, he hung up because you see a shoulder move and he's like, and then he's like, I already commented on China. I'm like, you motherfucker. He had no idea, which means he's a guy who's not used to being put in that he's obviously not a politician. But it's like, that is a very simple, uh, oh not if the China is paying your salary. It's not not a China is paying 8% of your salary.

It's not simple. And Taiwan does not exist. Only China exists. I'm just saying it's, I'm here to talk about health and the coronavirus in particular. You know what, speaking of China, I'm not a politician, I'm not a world leader, I'm not a government aid. I'm not a government aid. It is a political organization.

Well, it's become a bureaucracy, but it's, yeah, and it's funded by countries the world over. One of them is China. Yeah. Which means that one of them is us. Which means that Muslims doesn't exist. Which means that Muslims can be used as organ farms. That's what it means.

Really? Yeah. The Wiggers? Oh, did you know about that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. China, the New China crowd. Yeah. Is really, have you seen this sentiment going?

The China will pay, crowd? A little bit. This is even more, I swear to God, the last episode, the last episode of dinosaurs that animatronic dinosaur sitcoms from the 90s, the last episode of that show is what we live every day. I'm trying to remember the last episode. The last episode, there was too much deforestation

so it caused a climate shift. They said, well, we need more rain. So you know what happens when there's clouds, there's rain. And you know what makes clouds, whenever volcanoes blow off. Yeah. Because how are we going to, we never know how are we going to make volcanoes blow off? And the triceratop goes, well, drop bombs in them. Right. And then that was the end of the show. Right. Cainos blow off and the triceratop goes, well, drop bombs in them.

And then that was the end of the show. They kickstarted the apocalypse that killed off all the dinosaurs because of whatever. Right. We're living it every day. It's China. We gave China all of our manufacturing,

all of it, including Annabaya, all the medicine, all the ventilators, all those tests are coming, all the tests, everyone's all hopped up on getting tests. When they're all coming over, they're like, oh, third of them don't work. Why? Because you're being made in China, that's why, the masks don't work. The response is, the response is, China's gonna pay.

We're gonna nuke them. Wait a minute. Can you guys just stop buying shit that's just made in China? I know you can't. I know you fucking can't. No, cause it's, so we're going to war fuck. Cause it's everywhere, because we gave them all of it. Cause we just can't, we can't in the same way,

we can't stop one guy from driving a bulldozer through a skate park. We just fucking can't do it. It's like the South Park Walmart episode, where it's like, yeah, we got a bike out, and then it's like, Randy, what are you doing here? Like, you're all sneaking out in the middle of the night because it's just too tempting.

Fucking kids. Because it's cheap and convenient. Oh man, this whole thing is really hard into my heart. I swear to you. Let me see what else has made me a rage. Shit telling me that I didn't turn it off properly. If one more gadget or gizmo, this was, this disc was ejected improperly.

Your data might be fucked. How's this for fuck proper ejection Cushwing Discus throw out into outer space. I got out of the house. I got a ps4 because I wanted to get final fantasy 7 Playing it around first time I fucking play it go to shut it off. Oh To shut this thing off make sure you got you've got five choices to shut this down properly You've got suspended, suspended mode, animated suspension mode,

where you can still stream your picture. What the fuck is this? I don't need, I don't need any more choices. What about sleep, awake, sleep? Just off, just off, Nintendo, bromp, off. Yeah. You think this system works on the order of tariff laps. You can be making many,

you can be making four trillion decisions, I think I'm off of, billion decisions every, no megahertz, you can make a million decisions a second. You're four million, whatever your megahertz is, I can make about one in an hour. Do not make me, if I hit off, you figure it out.

Yeah. Figure out what you want to do. If I pull the shit out, you got enough thinking in there to put, to tell me off for doing it. So I fucking training me. Yeah. I'm being trained by every fucking thing I sit in chairs backwards. I spin it around like fucking William Recker. And I sit in that shit and correctly. In the future,, the chair is gonna pop up a little box that says, hey, are you sure you mean to be sitting in this chair in the wrong way? Well, it's something, something architecture, like the spikes on the bench or something,

like defensive architecture. Defensive architecture. That's for the bomb. Yeah, I know. And you sit down in the future, you sit in a chair, the smart chair, the Phillips, Magnavox, Google, Amazon, sit in a chair the smart chair the phillips magnavox Google Amazon US postal service smart share they're all gonna come together

It's gonna pop up a little box that says you're not sitting in this the right way scoliosis is the cause of of 10 deaths Every year right you are in danger in your health and you're in dangerering the lives of your children by putting your back at risk as the prime breadwinner in your household. The CPS has been called. Yeah. I just don't want that asshole Dyson to make any of that shit. Dyson with the ball? Dyson, you know, the fucking whatever they-

Ball, yeah. The mobility ball on the vacuum. Yeah, ever- That ball is bullshit, too. No, it's all bullshit. It's just- it's just- It's the same shit in a slick package. That ball does do a goddamn thing.

Regular wheels. Are people driving around with balls literally reinventing the wheel? Like a fucking hamster. Blah, blah, blah. Now, fucking wheels, bitch. Like you shine enough bright, shiny objects in front of people and they'll fucking,

they'll step on each other's head to get it Yeah, my fantasy fan you dick, you know, and also nice hand dryer Is that the one with the halo the fan? Yeah, I hate that fucking thing. I fucking hate everything that guy does I hate everything. Yeah anyone does okay fine. That's it. Well, we can't get that We can't do better than that so I stop. Final fantasy seven has so much fucking talking. I got the whole game. I got the PlayStation for I got the game because I'm going to fucking blow my brains out unless I start unless I commit to a virtual world. I see that the hamsters habitat is growing. Yeah. The hamster now has a playground. She's got a whole Norman Bates house going.

Yeah. And a little, that's her, that's her playground. She's like Bernie. We're going to get her three houses. Right. That's the hamptons. That's the Sanders. That's the hamster. Hamstons. That's the hamptons. I guess you can't really do that one. Ham can you? Hamstens. I don't know. Yeah. There's so much talking in this goddamn game. And the, so here's what I did. I don't know if you're playing Final Fantasy at home.

There's everyone's just, I know you're not. What's the last video Gimme played? Probably like, probably smash brothers. On what? In Atari? I don't know. No, I can't write. I mean, I don't know.

One of the more recent systems, I don't know. I changed. Somebody got me to do it. The voice acting and writing is so bad that I changed it to the Japanese. Oh, no shit. With only English subtitles. So I think I'm actually learning Japanese.

You, you know what I mean? It's so much immersion, like the kind of the way to do it. What do you, I'm just kind of being, I'm just hearing, yeah, just hearing it, you know. That's how my dad says he learned Spanish. Yeah, I don't fucking know. Well, wait a minute. So like, how he learned Spanish?

That's what he says. But he grew up in, Sean, it's best to just not, not try to unravel this. And this is the next, Gordian knot of his life story. The next barbecue, I got questions for him. He grew up in Sean, it's best to just not try to unravel this. The next Coridian knot of his life story. The next barbecue, I got questions for him. That's a mistake. I grew up in like Venezuela.

I'm only 39. I look like this because of dealing with his ass for the first 18 years of my life. Not easy. So I put it to Japanese and it's so much more enjoyable. I don't have to listen to what some pencil dick like thinks is an engaging story. And the chicks are way hotter with all the Japanese and they're little Japanese-y shit.

Yeah. And I've come to the conclusion that maybe it's just the voice of the American woman is like a dentist drill for me, you know, for various. I can see that for you. Because of my own self-loathing. That's why. They're really, they're really sanding your skate park.

They are sanding your skate park. How does that guy live the rest like he just did that and he, and cash the check. I, yeah, well, who said, who was the, I don't know, who was the newspaper bear in the said, I'm not worried about takeover because I could just pay one half of the country to kill the other half. That's what America means. That's the respect I have for the American people. And then you see this?

Like, yeah. Well, yeah, no. As I, yeah, I don't respect the American people by and large. Like, I don't think like, I don't, I don't, I don't go, you know, they're smart enough. I give the American people more credit than, no. Oh, you don't. No, it's the German people. I honestly believe the George Carlin bit.

Think of how stupid the average person is and then realize half of them are dumber than that. That's true. But if I get told by one more thing that I didn't shut it down properly, I hope I'm dead before pens start telling me that I didn't put the cap back on. Oh, you've gotta touch these buttons

before you turn me off. You're not my girlfriend, all right? I don't have to do. I don't have to touch any kind of buttons. Larry asked me where I saw myself. He said, where do you see yourself in five years? And I said, hopefully, all right? I don't have to do. I don't have to touch any kind of buttons. Larry asked me where I saw myself. He said, where do you see yourself in five years? And I said, hopefully, is it? Hopefully dead.

Yeah. Page China with the, oh, did I talk? Well, I also don't get like the people, the nuke China crowd, like that's murder. Do you guys not get, where is this nuke them? I know. That's called genocide. The same thing. You're same thing more bright idea like in the Middle East just level the level of the Middle East Yeah, okay God, it's a it would be amazing to see things that simply

Yeah, would the police on social media here was another good what are they doing? I Think that maybe police should not have social media accounts. I think a lot of people should not have social media here was another good what are they doing? I think that maybe police should not have social media accounts. I think a lot of people should not have social media accounts. That's true, but let's get rid of the cops one first. This is the Raleigh Police North Carolina. We are aware of the North Carolina Raleigh protests that is occurring in downtown Raleigh and Wilmington and Jones Street.

They're in violation blah, blah, blah, arrests. God, damn it, did I not get... Oh yeah, here's how they kept it off. Protesting is a nonessential activity. Because nonessential is a, everybody's throwing that term around. Are you essential? Are you nonessential?

Protesting is a nonessential activity. Is the, I don't know, the oxymoron of the century, maybe of all time. I could see that. Protesting will not be, the protesting is a non-essential activity. Oh, oh, well, in that case. Oh, I didn't know.

I'll just wait, I'll just wait it out there. Thanks for, your compliance is appreciated. Thank you. Thank you so much. We have a survey for you to fill out to make sure that you've been policed in a manner that is satisfactory. How many stars do you give us? How many mickies would you give us out of five?

Mickies. That's an old. Oh, you mean, it's a four out of five mickies, right? That's a weird kid that did the interview or did the review of Disney World? Did you ever see that? Yeah, I did.

Trying to pay what they owe. Yeah, well. I mean, I think it would be easier to, I think it'd be easier for the average person to commit to genocide than it would be to just buy things that were made in America. You know, you may, I don't know that you're wrong on that. I think, historically, I think that's accurate. If we had more genocide than we've had

repatriation of manufacturing, right? If you kill people you don't know and who are really far away, it's hard to connect with it. Yeah, you know, that's, I mean, that's the thing. I think it's, and I kind of think that, like I think it would be okay to do it across the street as well. Like, ah, these guys have been,

I've been fucked over a lot by these people. You know what, I'm taking a parking space. I'm calling the cops on these guys on the golf course. I've been fucked around by a lot of golfers in my day. Fuck these guys. Let me see what else I had here. Yeah, that was good. That was good.

The USPS bailout, you know anything about that? No. I mean, yes, but know anything about that? No. I mean, yes, but I don't know the specifics of it. I didn't think anything of it until I got six emails in a row from one of my neighbors saying that we all have to band together and buy books of stamps to stop the USPS from going out of business.

I'm like, wait, this bitch has only sent me stuff about like bread and block parties. Now I need to buy stamps to keep the US. I'm not going to. Well, you need your junk mail. Yeah, we got to keep the junk mail coming up. I looked it up. I actually looked it up.

It's what they're for. Half of their revenue, half of their volumetric revenue comes from junk mail. Yeah, I know. 70 billion out of 150 billion or something like total comes from just sending you spam. It's like, it's like we need to band together. Original spam and give a bailout for a click for ads on website. Yeah. It's like, this is, this is not any kind of a legitimate service they're providing. I don't give a fuck if the entire, if the entire USPS went away overnight,

I would be, my life would be, yeah, my life would be improved by this. Yeah. And then they throw out, well, you know, it's the second biggest employer. There's 500,000 people that work for it. There's 500,000 people who are homeless in the US every night. Yeah.

The amount of employees that about the number? That's accurate. Yeah, every night. Yeah. There's 500,000 people in some state of homelessness in America. So I'm out buying $11 in stamps to keep an industry afloat that only delivers me garbage advertising that I have to take from the mailbox and throw in the trash that is that is that that Amazon that makes Amazon money. So every time Amazon uses the USPS to deliver something instead of UPS or

FedEx, whatever bailout money, the USPS gets goes directly into Amazon's pocket as cash. You see how that works? A lot of people don't understand how money flows, but if you are subsidized and you're turning around and competing against private industry with your subsidized price, you are taking their money from a real private company and giving it to the entity that is using your subsidized services.

Every time you get a package from USPS, from Amazon, it's just your tax money going into Amazon's pocket. This is the second level, the third level of their service is making it possible for people who are too stupid to vote without getting it hammered down their throat, making it impossible for that class of people to cast their ballot. Are you in this is I would is there a way I can buy anti postage stamps to drive them out of business harder? Yeah, right. If there is, I would love to find it.

But for some reason when these cockroach-like entities exist, it seems impossible to do anything to ensure their failure. Yeah. I didn't even fucking care about it until I got six emails in a row from the boomer down the street saying we got a band together because a Trump, because a Trump came possibly run this institution out of business. I don't know. I don't know if anyone really cares about the post office, but holy fuck, I am so sick of getting their fucking ads and then being told that this is an entity,

we've got a band together to bail out. Let me see here, the diaper guy, I guess he's not calling in. Let me see. Because you haven't heard from him or? I haven't heard from him. I told him, I gave him my Skype number. Let me check.

Kiwi wants to call in. Oh man, I want the diaper guy to call in. No, me too. Let me see if Riley's here. I actually, I really wanted to talk to that. Hey, Riley, yeah, there he is. Hey, what's up guys? What's up, man?

So Riley's been going to a bunch of these protests. Oh yeah? Yeah, Riley, what was that church you went to? So that was Amin Bundy's illegal Easter service. I don't know if you guys know who that is. Sean probably doesn't. Please tell us who it is. So he led the Mountier Wildlife Refuge Hold in Oregon in 2016,

where he like took a wild life refuge from the federal government there. He won in court. He also held his family's property in 2014 against the federal government in Nevada. Is this what it is to the Bundy guys? Yeah, he's aiming Bundy from the Bundy ranch. Yeah, remember the Bundy ranch?

Sure. So he was a participant in that state. So he's the famous domestic terrorist. Yeah. So no cops showed up to break up our legal Easter. Really? Did they not? No, no cop was there at all.

Nobody even came to see it. There was like a bunch of dudes with guns and stuff. Oh, wow. Because that's a death sentence. Like they've already, the bunny ran, they were shooting at the, I don't know, last one. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, they don't care at all about killing police

and they've won in court twice after being arrested. So what's the point? Yeah, yeah, send them down to San Clemente so they can protect some skate parks Some of them got a stupid in his hell So how was the how was the service was there a bunch of reporters and shit there? Yeah, there were a bunch of bug men with masks You've even just uh it's like a term that people started using for people going around wearing like masks

Yeah, actually like it's an apocalyptic fallout situation. Okay. Like there's like little bug dudes. You can see their buggy eyes, but not the rest of their face. I see. Okay. Yeah, they're out there getting endangered if that's how they feel anyway. It'd be easy to be on the right side of the endangerment. Yeah. But they're getting paid to be out there not liking freedom, so it's interesting.

Yeah, that was cool that you went to another protest, too. Did you talk to Bundy while you were there? Oh, yeah, yeah, absolutely. We've been texting a little bit. He's super busy right now, but I'm going to try to get him on the show. Sexting? Oh, that? Texting.

Oh, no, no, no sexting at all. He's a very happily married Mormon man with seven children. No, he's happily married. No, he's happily married. Anybody who says they're happily married, I don't fucking buy. Well, the Mormons are anyway. Maybe the Mormons. What is the other process? No, not the Mormons. No. So the other one is another thing that Diego Rodriguez and Wayne Hoffman through. They're like the Idaho Freedom Foundation people here. Yeah. The second one was at the Boise capital building and they got the 2A Alliance involved.

So all the gun guys came out and about 300 people. Alcoholics, the alcoholics anonymous teamed up with the 2A guys. They just decided to combine it into alcoholics and amendments. Yeah. Yeah. So now it's they've combined the two A's to A A squared. Right. Yeah. What was that like?

It was great. There were a lot of angry people driving by who didn't get out and do anything about it. One guy who can piss you off there breaking social conditioning or distancing. Yeah, everybody was really mad about it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Somebody said that the next Ruby Ridge is our fault or something. I was like, I'm on camera with my GoPro. Is that? Ruby Ridge was in the federal government,

killed a couple with a killed at least the wife, right? Ruby Ridge, these people were, they were, was it kind of being surveilled, right? Was this in Colorado? No, Ruby Ridge was here and I know. Oh, it was in Idaho, yeah. Well, they ended up like firing on the house and stuff. And she was a 11-day siege back in the back. That was a seat right in the back. Exactly. Yeah.

Well, it's one of the biggest cited like government overreach situations where people decided not to fight back or to fight back. Oh, it's cool to see you there. The best thing about the Capitol building thing was people like Tammy Nichols were out there. She's in the Idaho House of Representatives. So we've got a government support out there.

Brad Little was in the capital building. He's the governor. He was like hiding in the building, watching through the window. If you see him before the protest, he pro again, you just see his eyes. Yeah, he's super against freedom. He's a Republican on his dad's side. I was like, I feel like Jewish on your dad's side. Yeah, that's the bad.

Yeah. Well, I'm Jewish on the dad's side. According to his website, he got into politics because one of his dad's friends gave him a seat. Yeah, well, welcome to fucking politics. Yeah, but you don't tell people that. He says on his website accidentally, I've made two YouTube videos about him now, so. I mean, the only honest video I made about the recent one.

Where can people see that video? Plug your stuff. Yeah, I just dropped it in the chat. I don't have a slash for it because I don't have a hundred subs yet. YouTube's stupid. So. Oh, stupid. So. Okay. But yeah, I'll keep going to these.

They're only gonna get funnier, I think. I think so too. People are gonna give more and more pets. They're gonna get funnier. Yeah, the next 2016 election cycle. Yeah, I forgot I wanted to read this. I had Easter. We went up Easter with my parents.

Oh, you did end up going up. Yeah. And it felt really weird. Yeah. Cause I haven't seen my family in a long time. I haven't really talked to them. So there's no telling how much insanity they've been on. Has occurred between your last visit and like my sister

when she had the coup, she was watching way too much news. Yeah, you got to, it's not fucking deadly for your age. Just calm down. It's very rare that somebody, her age would have severe problems. Yeah, you're gonna be fine. Did she ever get tested or were they just like a show? They don't test.

They can't. Well, they're loud. You can test here. If you have symptoms, if you've been exposed to somebody, there's free tests, there's dry through tests, you can do that in no one. Not when she had it. Not when she had it-through tests, you can do that in no time. Not when she had it.

Not when she had it. Oh, no, she had it like a month ago. But my nephew, BamBam, wrote a madlibs for Easter. I posted them and read it to you, right? BamBam, okay. Yeah, he's four. Yeah, this is four. I asked him how old he was after he wrote it because I forgot.

He was five. My sister's got nine. He's not, he's not. He's a lie. He's a lie. You know, you know, might as well be close to five. Yeah, I think he's close to five. This was his mad lives for Easter. It was a weird quarantine Easter though.

Yeah. People are just terrified. Who was it? Who was it just you guys who went up or with so that was parents? Did you, did so and your sister's family came over to you. Yeah, yeah. Here was his man lives.

On Easter morning, I awoke with a twinkle in my butt cheek. Where did the Easter 80s girl hide my basket this year? I went searching and found mine tucked behind a poop guitar. After discovering it, I ate diarrhea. Oh, okay. I see butts diarrhea. Pooh. Yeah, that's pretty good, though. Yeah, it is. Yeah. But this is what's on. This is at the forefront of four-year-olds thoughts.

Oh, this one. Most of them. It was the biggest Easter dead rat I had ever seen. Oh, yeah. It was spilling over with candy, toys, and poop bags. Uh-huh. There were candy dead flowers, chocolate covered dead frogs, and plastic eggs filled with diarrhea.

Yes. There was even a giant chocolate, there was even a giant chocolate Easter Diary Lady. Oh yeah, my favorite. I mean, I immediately pulled off the colored foil wrapping and bit off its weiner, yummy. But what I saw in the next in the Easter basket made my eyes pop out of my butthole.

Uh-huh. Bwa, I exclaimed. Fuck a kid. The Easter Bunny brought me the new Menchis Recon video game. Menchis, he throws in there. Yeah. That was a noun.

Every single other noun, poop, diarrhea, dead rat, okay, another noun, munchies. I exclaim, this was the best Easter in the history of poopy umbrellas. I posted this, I posted this on my socials, only to find out that a significant amount of people do not understand how madlibs work. Oh, okay. And they all say, oh, wow, that's really nice handwriting for a four-year-old.

And I wanted to reach through the screen and go, hey, fucking funny man. Right. Madlibs, you may have not ever done madlibs with someone. You fucking, you unfunny asshole, you you are asked what sort of word to come up with and someone else writes it down. That's how madlibs work. And the first guy said it, I said, oh, this is while he's just fucked, he's just trying to got too excited, made a joke, trying to make a joke.

One after the fucking other, wow, that's great handwriting for our people out there playing madlibs by themselves reading it and then coming up with a word that's supposed to be there and then yet reading it and yucking themselves up like, do they not understand or there, of course there are, of course there are people out there who are doing madlibs incorrectly. They even have, I don't know anybody who does them. I've got tons of, I bring them everywhere I go. There's even another sheet, there's a sheet attached to the madlib on the top of it with has no context

that you can write in the words and then read it to yourself and use this to prevent you from ruining the comedy of the madlib as you go. This exists too, but if my nephew who was four was doing it by himself, he would have used the decontextualized sheet that's attached to the madlib, you fucking idiot. He wouldn't go through if he's going through and writing his own madlib, he's gonna do it correctly. So either you don't understand how madlibs work

or you're saying that my nephew is an idiot and is doing it by himself incorrectly. Which one is it? That's all I have to say about that. Anyway, Riley, yeah, he's gone. Okay, where is... One man I can be here. Not a community, because I thought you moved on.

Get out of here. That's great. It's awesome to see you with those protests. Yeah, I'll keep going. No diaper man. Damn it. Damn it indeed. Maybe he's having a little accident.

He's feeling a little fussy. Maybe, but also, I don't know how, like, I mean, it's hard to find diapers in the stores, isn't it? Oh, is it? I mean, when we saw it, we were there. We're there. We found it CVS. Yeah.

Maybe he forgot it. Maybe he doesn't have a mask and he can't go, but no, I think we probably orders online. Oh, shit, back orders. Yeah. Damn. I saw his Reddit posting too and the last one he posted was like, does anybody got in a divorce because of their diaper stuff? Oh, yeah.

Because in that episode we talked about what? He was complaining that he was pointing out that his wife wasn't as cool with his diaper loving. Yeah. Well, I guess he got wage-capped. Um, let me see. Come on. Come on. Is Frank here? We'll fight your wife. Yeah. Is Frank in there? Who's frirly? Frank Castle. I'm gonna read some comments on this. Frank Castle. Frank Castle. Oh Frank Castle. Frank Castle. I'm gonna read some comments on that. Frank Castle. Frank Castle. Oh Frank Castle. Frank Castle. That was Frank Castle. Like, there isn't that the... Punisher. Yes.

That's a different guy. Yeah. Braylee, get Frank on. Is Frank around? Oh my God, and the Chris Cantcast is back. I know. Oh. Yes. And Chris immediately starts with, I think we need to change the name. Yes That's the beginning of the Chris can't cast. He says he wants to call in maybe in a little bit I want to talk to Frank first Frank's really funny guy. Here's some comments from last from last week Hey, hey Dick and Sean. This is advice

Advice from it insane DDLGX girlfriend follow up. Do you remember that? Daddy Dom little girl. Yeah. He wrote a follow up. Okay. Last time I wrote about my crazy X girlfriend who I got back without of desperation

and told you I had to. Right, right, right. For fake leaving for Europe or some shit. Dick advised me to fake my death, which I'm currently in the process of. Good. Oh, somebody else is gonna do it. It's gonna be a lot of fake deaths.

Yeah. Let's see here. I'm combining our ideas. On the day I'm leaving for road rage 200 and, oh, this was a while ago, damn it. I'm gonna tell her I'm going to France for a week. A French friend of mine is gonna call her two days later and pretend to be a French cop who says they found my wallet.

Wait, it's not the same guy, is it? What are the other guy fake his death? I don't remember the guy who called in. It was something of 200. Was it this guy? They'll say they're... No, you read it, didn't you? Am I, no, you're mixing up too.

What, wasn't it in France or something? Maybe he called in on 200 and told us of the plan. They say, they'll say they're forming a search and about three days later she'll get another call informing her that the search is called off and I'm being declared missing at this time. Just don't make her worried for three days. Just say you're dead. He's dead and we found him fucking another chick.

Give her, let her go. Don't fuck with your brain like that. Or do, I don't care. This was the plan and it went off without a hitch, though it did cost me 50 euros to convince my frog friend to actually make the second call. Wow. Okay, well, he's complaining about 50 euros.

Rip Cross McNull, the psychology, psychological theory of cuckoldry. Hey, Dick, I was listening to the interview with the Cuck guy in episode 202 while studying for my psychology final, and I was thinking to myself why the fuck his brain worked the way it did when it comes to being cucked. This guy, so this guy is studying for his psychology final. He's got some interesting stats in here. Funny enough, the content I was studying might lend itself to a theory as to why cucks are cucks. I don't know if you give a shit about this,

but maybe Sean will. See, always the backhanded, always slams constantly. According to Shafter's theory of emotion, our cognitive response to stimuli can be very based on the emotion brought about by it and what we view the stimuli as, nerd. Basically, we could experience a similar emotion, but depending on what we label the situation as

in our minds, our perception of the emotions we're feeling will change. Does that make sense to you? Yeah, so you experience emotion, but depending on how you contextualize the situation you're currently in, it will affect the emotion you're describing. Like, if you're eating a delicious sandwich,

but you're also really stressed out, it's the most fucking delicious sandwich. If you're eating a sandwich and you're shooting up a school at the same time, maybe it will be a more delicious sandwich. I think is what he's saying. I mean, they're in testing. They're in testing the testing case. We're eating a York peppermint patty

and you're performing an abortion. Maybe it will be the most, it will be a really wild peppermint patty. I think that's what he's saying. It's like being snuck up on and scared by a stranger versus a friend sneaking up on you and fucking with you. In both situations, we feel intense surprise, but in the stranger's case, we feel genuine fear while with a friend, we label it as excitement.

Now in regarding being cucked is labeled as sexual arousal in their minds due to being in a situation of a sexual nature, this behavior can be linked to a study done by Dutton and Aaron in 1984 in which men were crossing two different bridges while accompanied by an attractive female research assistant. One bridge was sturdy and low to the ground, while the other was a high swaying bridge.

After crossing said bridge, they were asked to rate the assistant and were given her number. The men who were on the scarier bridge were much more likely to rate the assistant higher and call her number. How about that? So that feeling of attraction was amplified just because they were in a scary position. Right, a tense, like speed. That's what Sandra Bullock said, it's speed.

Right, remember that. This is due to the cognitive appraisal of fear being on the bridge, being labeled as the end. Interesting. Basically the cucks mentally labeled a fear and embarrassment of being an inferior male as sexual attraction in their minds, thus making them cook fetishes. For all I know I'm talking about, out my ass.

Speaking of cucks, remember that we talked about that guy Idubs? Yes. He filed a DMCA complaint against the entire internet for his girlfriends, for his girlfriend's nudes, getting posted on like 4chan in Kiwi Farms. He filed, this is the guy who said he was not mad and that he was totally cool with his girlfriend, buying his girlfriend tits so she could open an only fans page.

Yeah, I guess maybe he wasn't so. I understand. Nobody wants their content, their paid content released, but I don't know if it gets released, maybe DMCA in 4chan is not the best way to go about. Maybe that's maybe there's a little something going on in that, in that fucking thought process then just protecting your copyright. If you're submitting a DMCA against 4chan, that will do nothing and will get you made

fun of by the entire internet. That's what I mean. What does he actually, he doesn't actually think that will work, right? I mean, I don't know. And the backlash, like his bitch is putting him up to it. Like the backlash is gonna be, oh, maybe so, the backlash is gonna be way worse. Yeah.

Riley's Frank here. Oh, hello. Oh, yeah, there you are. What's up, Frank Castle? How's it going, man? The Punisher. Yeah. That's what I thought. What's it going, man? The Punisher. Yeah.

That's what I thought. What's going on? Your videos are really funny. Thank you, man. I appreciate that. I'm gonna try to find this one that I was showing my girlfriend right before the show. Hot dog.

Hot dog. Hot dog, brawl. What is it called? Hot dog heroes, ghetto rumble. I'm in. I'm in. I hear hot dogs and ghetto and that's, so what are you?

Frank, will you introduce yourself to the audience please? Yeah, of course, Ty. My name is Frank Hasel. I make YouTube videos that are kind of a mixture of like, it's like Jackassass more confrontational, more direct, just going out in public and being a nuisance, bothering people, getting reactions. You know, you're really unbothering people. I love a more direct jackass. There's one of this guy, there's one of this guy at a gym where he's just slapping his stomach, like staring at the mirror while

a guy's doing dumbbell presses next, he's going, oh, until somebody tells him to stop. They never do. Yeah, many rolls up to another guy at the gym and just starts talking about wanting pussy. Like, I'm here to work out because I like pussy. Yeah. What do you think about pussy? You like pussy?

He's like, it calm down, man. There's kids, he's like, there's no kids here man. I'll just love pussy, right? You want to tell me over and over. Here is, can you set up this hot dog heroes, ghetto rumble for people who maybe aren't watching the video, which is stupid of them, but they exist. They're out there.

Yeah. So this is a video where we were in fall wherever Massachusetts, which is kind of a hell hole, I guess, in New England. And we were filming a bunch of stuff all over Fawar River that day, that YMCA video was filmed the same time, like an hour for this. Just kind of going around to different establishments until they either called the police and made us leave or we felt we knew the leave.

And we were about to head back to the home base and I was walking to the sidewalk and there was this weird looking guy and I threw down a package of Oscar Meyer hot dogs on the grounds and I said, sir, are these your dogs? And he got very confrontational and like, serving so shoving me, he spit on me. I'm gonna play it. Just set up is, sir, are these, sir, you've dropped some hot dogs. Yeah.

Yeah. It's an odd reaction. I can't even know, Sean. We'll see why. Maybe there's more to it. Maybe, maybe. Maybe, oh, this is Fall River. I see crime rate is above 88.4% of US cities.

Yeah. It is a ghetto.4% of U.S. cities. Yeah. It is a ghetto indeed. Here you go. I'll turn it up. I got it. There's Frank in his pink shirt, his pink polo shirt. A pre-opened hot dog package asking a guy. I'm not playing games on your asking you guys Boy those are your dogs

Are those your dogs? No, mine. I'm gonna tell that one of them. Are those your dogs? I'll say it again. Are those your dogs? No. No, don't say it again. Are those your dogs? Oh, come. Look at that pussy walking away.

Bitch. Uh, he's, the guy he's talking to, he has like that strung out prison. Oh yeah. He looks like he's fresh out of jail. Where you can see their entire eye. Like people have been to prison. You, they can open their eyes wide enough so you can see the entire eyeball yeah yeah here's right here he's coming back after you after you called him a pussy he's he walked away about 30 40

feet now he's walking back very aggressively I guess I'm not a shopping match. Yeah. Nice close up. Oh, shitty one down there. Hey. Stop calling me, bitch. I ain't gone. I'm gonna bust your fucking head. Calm down. Stop, guy.

Calm down. You dropped your dog. Oh, my God. You dropped your dog. You dropped your dog. All right. That's just good. That's just good. You dropped your dogs! That's just good. That's just good. Oh, he's got him now.

He's got to see if he picked up his hot dog and threw it. What did you do? Why are you throwing your dogs into the air? You're throwing noises. Why are you throwing your dogs at me? Dude, come on. That's like a crazy reaction to what you think. It was weird, guy.

He didn't like, he didn't throw any punches or anything. He just kind of pushed me a bunch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now he's coming after you, pushing you into the shrubs. What do you do with this jacket? It's OK. Now your friend is stripping off his jacket. He looks like a muscular man.

Yeah, no, that's the commander, Jason Conner's a very funny individual. Okay. This is great. This is great. What made you do this, Frank? I don't know. I have a background in pissing people off online.

And after getting hooked up with Sam, he asked me if I felt like I'd do it in real life. And I said, well, you know, I'll give it a try. Oh, yeah, you can. So I started out just like, you know, shotgunning high-necks in the bathroom of establishments to work up the courage to talk to people in slowly but surely like, uh, gave me ability to do stuff like this. Like found your home.

Like to junkies and like, you know, yeah. You dropped your dogs. How did you, I mean, that's just like, how did you come up with the hot dog as, you know, the piece of the gag? Why would you, it could have been anything, eggs, like whatever, but you kept hot dogs.

No one has ever dropped their open pack up. No. That's what's more amazing about it. I think that's what we're doing. No one's ever used that. Yeah, I think we're just kind of workshopping some things to do. And I don't remember whose idea it was.

So we should just get a package of hot dogs and carry them around. And just the idea that somebody would be carrying around. And asking them if they had dropped their their uncooked hot dogs on the ground. It's just so funny to us. And the fact that somebody took it seriously enough to get really angry, which is like the greatest thing in the world.

So aggressive that you're like challenging their whole paradigm for their world with the dropped hot dogs. Yeah, it sounds like ready to go back to jail over a package of uncooked hot dogs. Crazy. So funny to me. Did you have to encounter several crack addicts before you found this one with the hot dog? No, that was the first hot dog guy. That was the first one.

So that was the first one. He really found magic. Oh, yeah. Yeah. You've done this more. The same hot magic. Oh, yeah, yeah, you've done this more. The same hot dog. Oh, wow. Oh, we've done a couple times, a couple times, but nothing was as good as that. That was like, uh, there was a time we went into a best by and we were accusing people in the best by of dropping their hot dogs on the ground. And the best bike all the cops on us. Oh boy.

Yeah, it was interesting. Somebody came up to you and said, look, you dropped these hot dogs. I probably laughed. I probably said, no, this can't be mine because I only like red hots or something. There you go. That would ruin their video real fast. Hot links. It's very interesting to see that guy flip out over hot dogs.

You know, I still don't. Yeah. What other social experiments have you done? The one you talked about before just going to the gym and talking about how badly, well, the original idea was just going to the gyms and doing like vlogs about how I'm tired of being fat and gross and how I want to get jacked so I can get pussy. You know, that one was when I've done a few times just offering to towel people off at

the gym. Oh yeah, I got it. That's right. I remember that one. I had to go well. Let me, this one's called Manlit Liquidator. Frank Casso. Is this one, one I can play?

Yes, that is very funny, I think. Okay, hold up, let me cue up the video. Again, everybody, the video you can get at patreon.com slash the dick show for only $1. So if you're like that beautiful girl earlier that didn't even know you could do it, I'm telling you right now. Or you can see this where what's the name of your site? Manlet liquidator. Frank. Hassel. Frank. Hassel. YouTube.com slash Frank Hassel. Frank Hassel. Because he hassles people. Yes.

Okay. Um, here you go. He's at the gym here. Looking the mirror lifting very small five pound weights. I'll lower it a little bit. Stay one of my insomplog. Try to get jacks so I can get some pussy. There we go. Okay. We just want to get some pussy. Uh-huh.

My thumbs up with the gym. I shit my pants all over the place. Oh, it's running down my leg. It goes all over the floor. Just want to get some pussy. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh.

Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh.

Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Just to be clear, that is not Frank making that noise. That is the most annoying guy at the gym. No, no, everybody knows, yeah, everybody's seen that guy or heard that guy. Roaring like Frank and Stein. Yeah, what the fuck is wrong with you? Yeah, just, I need to hear the, that you put some effort into stifling that like a hiss or something.

I understand that you got to get it out, but I need to hear the slightly stifled. Next to the guy who's, that's the most annoying guy and also the most annoying guy in a tie for that is the guy who is rapping, like along with his headphones, like just full fucking, like full volume, like shut the fuck up. Or the ghost rapper. Yeah. The guy who's like, does the set and then you put up, and it's kind of coming in and out of wrapping.

The fact that you think like what you don't think, but then also like, yeah, like other people are just totally cool with like whatever you're listening to, essentially. Cold cock that guy. Shut the fuck up. I'll be hit him with a fucking dumbbell. I was still at the gym playing his music out loud for everyone to enjoy.

Yes, yes, yes. You know what would be legal? I think is you wait for that guy to get into his third set, his third set of bench, and then you just say something. No, say something really funny. Right? When he gets you spotted, say, but I want to spot you. Yeah. I want to, I want to spot you. spot you and then he's like eight and he's really Struggier you go like tickly tickly balls like something like that Get him to laugh something you know is gonna kill and then just let him die, right? I was like doing that at the YMCA and I was I was standing next to him while he was his lip thing and I was going Like fucking, you know grunting for him and he was lifting and I was going, grunting for him and he was not pleased about that.

Yeah, right. We used to work out in the two one expresses garage in high school. You know, I'm gonna really talk about my buddy in high school. He was a big weight lift, too. Well, because he was small. He was short guy, so he lifted a lot.

And he was cranking the insane clown posse. This was 1996, bitch. Maybe, 19, 19, six, bitch. Maybe, yeah, there's 19, 19, 19, six. So I'm doing the bench and he's over me, but he's like Mr. Motivation. Yeah. So he's like, come on, you can do it. You can do it.

But every time he does like, that makes me feel uncomfortable. I laugh. And then the ICP, one of their songs came on and he goes, and I was fucking three fat bitches Lost it. Yeah, I started laughing and he's still going come on you can do it You can push through it. I'm like man, they're weird Remember that story you didn't get a guy on the weight machine and then you tell him tell him that and you go Oh shit, I have to go to the hospital My wife the weight machine and then you tell him tell him that and then you go oh shit I have to go to the hospital

My wife's giving birth and then you just leave He's dying. Yeah, yeah trying to figure out how to drop one side of the weight Then you put you put other benches, so he can't tilt it. Yeah, it's a very elaborate set up It's that annoying you have to go in and prep beforehand. Yeah, you got to work with the gym guy. Yeah. You think you could pull that prank off, Frank? I think that would take a lot of work, I think, to murder someone at the YMCA. I mean murder.

Yeah. You know, you give him enough rope. You give him enough rope. That's what that is. Yeah, that's true. Okay. I have to put that on like one of those not film is. Yeah, that's true. Okay. I have to put that on one of those not film websites, I think. Like Vimeo.

Now I'm just thinking about ways to prank murder people. Yeah, of course. Yeah, hanging a news. Well, now I'm trying to make the world more like the road runner cartoons. Like, sprinkle peanuts all over the weights until somebody with an allergy comes in. See, this is how it comes up with hot dogs. I'm going to never come up with that. I'm peanut man.

I go everywhere. I dust all over from the, yeah. I go to a lot of planters cans. I go to PTA, like I go to children's performances at schools with like a giant bag of peanuts, like a hundred pound bag of peanuts, and eat it like a dust from the bottom of the can. Looking like pig pen with peanut dust and the women are, oh, you gotta get this guy.

I'm trying to watch my kid, you bitch. Okay, let's continue watching Manlit Liquidator. Chad noise is counter three. And just for the people at home, I mean, you're not in shape No, yeah, okay, I'll leave it at that. Here you go. That's kind of joke. I think is that I'm like a I'm a fat out of shape guy bother and people at the gym. Yeah, well, you want pussy Who doesn't I mean get out of shape people want pussy too. Yeah, of course. Yeah. Yo.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's one of the jacks I can get pussy man. This guy, big guy coming over. Yeah. Muscular Danny that we do.

Is that illegal? Guy with shaved head wearing a long sleeve, Gore-Tx Active wear Thing that I also hate here we go. God the guy is What is a pussy man? We go to get pussy man. I just want to get some slip I'm just trying to get jacks man Oh my God. Oh my God.

Oh my God. The guy in the manager. The guy is standing there telling him to leave. The guy's got to be like five feet tall or how tall are you? That's a story. Okay, so you're tall. You're tall, but that guy is damn that guy's short. Yeah, there he is.

Look, this is like this from Frank. Do you you know, have you seen fear in the movie? Yes. You know when they're smashing coconuts on their rental car? That scene when the, the attorney, Benicio Doutoro was spinning around and smashing the shit on the front of their car and there's a crowd of people going, you have to stop! You guys have to stop doing what you're doing. You voted for Hubert Humphries and you killed Jesus. That's what this is, right there.

This is real people. You have to stop. You have to stop grunting so loud at the gym. What have to stop doing this? Here we go. You're ruining this. The point is for me is that I just walked in here. I'm not a member or anything.

I literally just- Yeah, sure. I just walked in and started losing their weights and shit. Ah. I'm just trying to get some pussy, man. What's your problem? You're out. I just want to get some pussy.

Here. Oh. So what? I just want to get some pussy, man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man.

I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not veteran, is that what you just said? Yeah, I'm a veteran. I'm a re-server. He thanks me, he actually thanks me. Yeah, well he thought, oh maybe he's fucked up from being a combat. So he's gonna be a lot of pussy.

You get that in here. All right, let's just people at the gym. I'm gonna rock. I'm gonna rock. maybe he's fucked up from being a combat. So we're gonna be a lot of pussy. You're good at it here. All right, let's just people at the gym. I'm a rough girl, a man, dude. Yeah.

Not any kind of manager. I think the reason I place a black woman is an employee or something, I'm not sure. I don't know. The little guy is just some dude who is there working out. Yeah. All right, very good, Frank. It's fucking funny.

Thank you. Thank you for doing what you do. Thank you, man. I wish everyone was like you. Then we wouldn't need to do these videos. We would just be constantly entertained. We could just, we could just all chill out, have a nice time and think about the, I would buy stock and hot dogs if everybody did stuff like this. Yeah, man, we'd all be rich.

Yeah. What do you, what do you have planned next? Are you doing stuff with Sam? Hi. I will be hopefully sometime this summer. I'm in Atlanta right now. Do it a little, doing some stuff for him remotely, but hopefully we'll link up I will be hopefully sometime this summer. I'm in Atlanta right now. Do it a little, do it some stuff for him remotely, but hopefully we'll link up again this summer

and we'll shoot some more stuff. And also I have some stuff planned. I would like to go to an escape room and potentially eat some clues. Or... Oh, I have some sort of mental breakdown. Oh, yeah, that's good. Eating the clues. Yeah, oh yeah. Eat the key. Like like jigsaw.

Yeah. Yeah, that's if that's funny. I think that would be a very good. Are you guys locked down at Atlanta? Oh yeah, yeah, we're we're hard for a locked. And I'm actually quarantined. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that. That would be a very good. Are you guys locked down at Atlanta? Oh, yeah. Yeah, we're, uh, we're hard for a lock. And I'm actually quarantined because somebody I work with directly get the virus.

So, uh, I'm locked inside your two weeks. Lock down. Oh, man, we went, uh, when did we go to Atlanta two years ago? I think so. That was fucking cool. That was the most. It barely felt like America. That was really wild.

Oh, no, I would be 300 pounds if I lived in Atlanta. Yeah, I'd look like Frank. I think there's a lot of good food here. No, shit. I'm starting to look like, I mean, I'm already halfway there. I'm kidding myself thinking that we look any different right now. Yeah, we're twins, man. Oh, yeah. Me and Twin, we're all twins now. Me, coach, madcucks, we all look like the same guy now. Yeah, we're twins, man. Oh, yeah. Me and twin, we're all twins now. Me, coach, mad cucks, we all look like the same guy now. Frank, what makes you a rage, buddy? I ask everybody that I'm calling.

Could you, could you, could you, what you said? What makes you a rage? What makes, what is that, what is that mean? I'm sorry. What pisses you off more than anything? Oh, what makes me rage? Yeah. Oh, I don't know, man.

People who try to cut line when I go places. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That gets me really good. People who don't accept responsibility for the hot dogs they leave on the ground. Yeah. That's another one. The cutters are bad because you have to be on guard for them all the time.

Yeah. Really ruins your line-weighting experience. Yeah, just the fucking... It's the best for you, man. It's a lady like walked directly in front of me. I wasn't there and I had to resist the urge to blow up my phone and start... Start asking her about hot dogs. Start asking her why she looks like Danny DeVito. You know, basically she's she's given essentially consent if she does that. Oh, yeah, I mean as far as you get just she's she's she's going online.

You can't wait you deserve as how I yeah, yeah, you're you you're metering out justice. Yeah, of course. Who would you really like to prank? Who's like who's like some kind of, I don't know, Celeb or whatever, E-Celliz? Do you know Bill Mitchell is? Yes, I do know who he's a GOP commentator, right, Wing Commentator. I would love to run up on Bill Mitchell. Bill Mitchell, I don't know. There's a couple, I think, I think Bill Mitchell is probably the top of the list just because I think he is so like out of touch with the internet that he would be very confused about what was happening to him.

Yeah. You probably get really, really angry. Yeah. Diarrhea check and all that shit, you know. Yeah. Why is it that making people angry so satisfying? I'm not sure. You know, I started out pissing people off.

I'm like Gary's mod and counter strike and stuff like that. And I always thought it was really, really, really funny just to come up with different bits to get different reactions out of people. And I don't really know, but I find it to be very, very entertaining. Yeah. I've always thought it was the control. Yeah. As long as they control so much of me, I can get that one thing out of them and they can

never take that away from me. Yeah. I can control you this little tiny bit. I don't care how illegal everything I do is. I don't care what you take. You could lock me in a world full of jokers. Well, you know, you don't want that, but you have given me no choice. You could lock me up like Hannibal Lecter with the Godfathers, put my arms behind my back,

put the muzzle on, but as long as I can look at you, I can still piss you off. Yeah, you're gonna have to kill me for that to stop. Right. You can put me in the bottom of the ocean. I'm still get that out of you. Some way, somehow I'll get that out of you. But that's just me. I've had a long time to think about it. Mm-hmm.

I think the idea of like going to a gym where people go there to do a certain thing and just doing completely the opposite of whatever you're supposed to be doing at wherever I am. Yeah. It's like, Just take a moment. Take my pants and eat.

It was supposed to work out and I'm treating it like my playground where I piss people off, you know? Yeah. There's this funny. There are so many people who are doing the goofiest shit at the gym. Yeah, it's very true too.

Yeah, I know. Weirdest stuff, like they're all the hose are all dressed up, taking pictures of themselves. It's so fucking obnoxious. Yeah. Very more obnoxious than a guy talking about getting pussy. Yeah, that was like- Crossfit and there's like nine people carrying a heavy bag across the room doing like zigzags over like truck tires and stuff,

you know. Yeah, I've never been to a CrossFit. I've seen them because they're always glass front and they always like work. Right, again, you can drive by and you see what everybody's doing, fucking with the ropes and the tires and the, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a clown show. Yeah. Now, you were on the Ralph Retour last week, weren't you?

Yes, sir. How was that? Did you have fun time? It was good. It was, it was very fun. Yeah, I had a great time on there. Yeah. Well, shit, I don't know.

Sean, you got any questions for Frank? I love this content. No, I'm, I'm good. I mean, I would, I would watch more videos. All right. But I think I know what he's about. Yeah, I think I do too. All right, Frank, get out of here, man.

Have a good Sunday. Hey, man, thanks for having me, appreciate it. Thanks for calling in. See ya. Later. Lalalala. Where was I on the comments? No diaper man.

No diaper man. But it criss is around, right? Oh, that's right. Maybe I'll get him on in a minute. We'll do some in a minute. We should. Yeah, I got questions. You know what, speaking of Chris,

Chris Hansen apparently gave me a message. He did hear that. Yeah, I do It's Hannah posted it speaking of you know pissing people off Chris Hanson Congratulations me on 200 episodes. Wow really let's hear it. It's a minute long. Let's hear it rich rich rich. What do I like to do with you? Rich a minute long, let's hear it. Rich, rich, rich. What a way to do with your... Rich. Chrissiancine here in Hanson versus Predators

to Ketra Predator and have a seat with a Chrissiancine. Now, I'm really curious. I'm gonna need you to have a seat right now. I think so. We threw some transcripts. And I see you just did your 200th episode of your weekly podcast. Rich. Yeah.

Awesome. Congratulations. Ah, thanks, Chris. You do amazing interviews. I mean, that was just mine, but... of your weekly podcast. Rich? Yeah. Awesome. Congratulations. Oh, thanks, Chris. You do amazing interviews. I mean, that was just mine. Well, I mean, anyway. I was on a... There's something you need to know.

Oh, boy. I heard from George. Yeah, that George. Anyway, he said that if you don't stop stealing his fans and garbage is, he's going to sue you. It's a be careful. We're in a pandemic. Stop stealing his fans and garbage is he's gonna sue you It's a be careful. We're in a pandemic. Just focus on your own show won't steal his stuff I'll be watching see you soon on the TV and my YouTube channel stay safe stay healthy

Keep up the good work with the podcast. Oh wow He said that if you don't stop stealing his fans and garbage is you're sweet. It's fucking hilarious. We're in a pandemic. Just focus on your own show. I'm so confused. So cameo is this site where like celebrities and e-selebrities will let you pay them to say whatever you want. So did Tanner write it? I don't know who did. I don't want to fuck them over, but maybe it's funny. That is funny.

God, that's funny. Shit blaster, 69,000 posted that. I don't know if he's the original one or what, but God. I don't understand. Maybe I'm putting on errors, but I really don't understand why someone would have a cameo account where people could pay you whatever to say to make a video for them. How much do you think that costs, Chris Hansen? I don't know.

Am I going to be doing that someday? Like, oh, fuck, I need 50 bucks. Somebody pay me something, please. Yeah, there's like, I'm off like a jerk, but it just seems like you have to kind of check your self-respect at the door for some of this shit, right? Yeah, just so just a guy who is a kind of famous, saying whatever people pay him to say, it's, I've tried to pay Rucca, Rucca Rucca Ollie.

Yeah. That guy that everybody used to know. Yeah. I tried to pay him just to say something about the lawsuit. It wasn't, it's like Matt's loss, something dumb like that. And he refunded my money. Like, oh, you bitch. Yeah, he's not gonna do it.

I guess. Fucking dickless asshole. What do you, oh, you bitch. Yeah, he's not gonna do it. I guess. I can dickless asshole. Just, what are you fucking care? Why do you fucking care? I don't know. There was that. Okay, back to comments. Oh, hurt Hawk.

Hey, Dad, what are the best cryptocurrencies to watch? Also, would you ever consider doing a podcast or Patreon special where you go into wealth management, investment, etc. I mean, I don't know. You could probably piece that shit together. My dad could do that. I don't know. It's so hard. I feel like such a dick ever saying anything about anything because like what do you, six trillion dollars just got created out of nothing? How are you going to plan for that? What are you gonna do by more index funds?

What if, like, what if there's only 30 more years on this currency? These are the kind of questions that keep you up at night. They do. I spent, I didn't sleep a couple days ago because I stayed up all night reading about chain link. It's a new cryptocurrency that tries to tie, it tries to tie smart contracts to real world events. So like you can have a smart contract,

the smart contract is a distributed app that runs on the Ethereum blockchain that cannot be changed once you submit it. So like if you wanna buy a house, like if the house ownership is digital, it will automatically enforce the mortgage and the payments, and if you default, you lose it, right? And it cannot be influenced or changed by real actors.

So it's, I mean, if you're going through, like if you're a billion dollar shipping industry, or if you're a billion dollar industry of any kind, you have these incredible amounts of logistics out there run by people. It would just save you so much money and issues, putting it all in the blockchain, where it's immutable. It can't be, you cannot fuck it up.

But the missing part is tying it to real world events, which is what the chain link cryptocurrency, it means to do. Hence the link. Yeah. And Facebook and Google are buying into a big time, because Facebook obviously wants to replace, they don't want to work at the dollar on their platform.

But I don't know, I don't know. Maybe some of this stuff's kind of boring. If anything, Bitcoin is having in like two weeks or something like that, three weeks or something like that, three weeks, something like that, which means it's gonna take twice as much computer power for the miners to generate the same amount of Bitcoins. Oh, I don't know.

So that's only how, it's happened twice so far and every time it happens another zero gets added onto the price of Bitcoin in the long run. So, if I had qualified for Trump Bucks, I would be putting that straight into Bitcoin, 1200 bucks of Trump Bucks in the Bitcoin. I don't know how else you're supposed to retain the wealth of the cash that you just got. Christian Parker, your anti-nurs talk makes me a rage. I hate the stupid videos of them doing choreographed dancing,

but it's nothing new. Well, I mean, you know, there's a whole pandemic at all. Well, the situation has changed. Yeah, that's kind of, I mean, you know, it just, it seems, I play violin all the time. Well, now you're running a concentration camp right now. That's why people have the, what, so, I play violin all the time. Well, now you're running a concentration camp right now. That's why people have the whoa so

um What are you gonna say? No, no, no, yeah, the issue I take is that everyone seems to think that all hospitals and nurses are slammed But they're not no, we know most are cutting staff and sending people home to low-staffing. It's just a little tone deaf Oh, yeah, yeah, little yeah It's just a little tone deaf. Yeah, a little, yeah. With most of the money coming from elective surgeries that have been canceled for so long with potentially a month to go,

Doug Tenepel had some kind of not elective, but let's see if there's anything wrong with that. Oh, like a biopsy or exploratory surgery? Cancer, it's like, what about yeah. Well, what about my, what about my cancer? What if something really, is that what, what, I mean, that's what there,

there's no way to know. Well, no, but I mean, is that what he went in? We have to see if it's cancer. I don't know. I don't want to pretend like I know. Yeah, no, true. It was something,

it was something that they wanted to do at one point. Yeah. They're not in a good place. Each hospital is filled with nurses, but only some parts of the hospitals are equipped to deal at one point. Yeah. Yeah. They're not in a good place. Each hospital is filled with nurses, but only some parts of the hospitals are equipped to deal with respiratory isolation. Especially when it comes to events and the ICU's, not to mention the PPE supplies,

everyone's heard so much about. This is what they were unprepared for. If only every unit of every hospital could take these patients. When it comes to pain killers, I get the frustration more than you'd think. No, because I'm the addict. Yet you blame the nurses, but nurses don't decide who gets the narc's doctors do. Again, the Nazi defense does not work on me. It's the person who has the key.

If I had the key, I'd go to the cabinet and unlock it and get it for myself. I don't need anyone's permission, but I don't have the fucking key and taking it from you is illegal. You have the key, go fucking get it. Okay. I don't know. At least don't give me an excuse, just give me no. I'm not gonna do it.

Okay, what's the excuse you get? Oh, it's a dog, it's up to the doctors, the doctors. See, I have to go, I have to take your wish and go to them, and then if I'm allowed to, I can come back and give you one. Oh, I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What if the key were just to be left somewhere while she went to the storage closet or somewhere else

for 37 seconds. And then this is a great point, because that's how then the key would be magically, it would still be there when she got back. That's how the medically assisted suicides work. The doctors say too loud what the code is to override the machine because it has protocols to keep you from killing yourself. They say it too loud, let you do it, pop, pop, pop, you're dead. So clearly they break the law when they want to feel good about themselves, but when I

want to feel good about myself, no vikin to net all. Well, you didn't go to med school. The nurses are just messengers, bad news, and dispensers of happiness. The doctors have had guidelines put in place by lawmakers, oh, so it's not even their fault either, but the license is on the line. Oh, man, this is a, oh, wow, I totally understand now. Second, turn about your livelihood. Ha ha ha ha ha.

Hey, Jake and Sean, this is the anti, I'm the anti-rape guy from last week. Following Sean's advice, I'll try to clarify a few things. Wait, I don't remember. The guy who stopped a rape. Oh, yeah, yeah. Remember? Yeah.

One, this all happened in a town near Montreal, Quebec. Yeah. Rough town. She picked herself a town near Montreal, Quebec. Yeah. Rough town. She picked herself up and ran away without a word. So technically, they might have gone after her, but I didn't just leave her on the ground to internalize what was about to happen to her asshole and a few seconds, Dick.

Wow. The limpedic cop I spoke to at the station asked me what I was doing out during martial law. I'm fighting crime. What are you doing? Why are you not out? Yeah, where were you, asshole? You should be out.

Yeah, stopping rapes. Right, or at least, letting at least stopping me from stopping them. Yeah, I had to go, I had to go find you. Yeah, I'm gonna tell me what are you doing out? If you're not gonna stop the rapes, at least stop me from stopping them. I had to go find you. Tell me what are you doing out? If you're not gonna stop the rapes, at least stop me from stopping them.

Late at night, but I was too tired to test the legality of flipping off an officer in Canada. So I guess my rage is not rapist, but Canadian cops. You're a joke plot twist where I was gonna go in on her after pushing the guy off is funnier than you know, since she started screaming even louder when I ran towards them. Probably think I was gonna cheat her.

Perhaps she was not thinking rationally. Food failure pussy. This guy says, Hey, Dick, I heard you tell that 300 pound virgin to try fasting for 30 days to help them get laid. I too am a 300 pound virgin, and I'm game 30 days or minus 100 pounds, whichever comes first. Any ideas? We should race them.

Yeah, we should. We have a fad off. We need to have a guy who actually knows how fasting works, I think, to run this. Okay. If anybody's like some kind of a fasting fitness guy, so I've heard people shed enormous amounts of weight. Intermittent fasting?

Yeah. Yeah, if you can stick to it. Yeah. Because some of you guys are too fucking fat. I mean, something needs to be known about that. See, look at all this stuff I didn't get to. Already. It's almost $1.45.

Let's do some advice. Torito, Don, hey, Dick, I'm going to be frank about this one. I'm a date-less loser with no idea of how to get one. I was raised by a feminist mom in a feminist family, in a feminist city, in a feminist state. It's like that song. How to make you afraid to do anything? Yeah, I think it would.

Without a beat, I was in a blue house, in a blue little car. Remember that song? I've learned all the wrong lessons about women. I've never, I've never, I've never anyone in my life, and I need to change that. I've never, I've never, I've never, anyone in my life and I need to change that. I'm 27, I have a dead in job, dropped out of college

and while I'm working on myself in terms of career, it'll be a while before I can make money from it, especially with the current quarantine. And short, I'm not exactly a hot commodity. I'm not looking for a hot girlfriend, just a decent looking one. Oh. for a hot girlfriend, just a decent looking one. Mm.

Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm. Beggars can be choosers after all. Why don't you shoot for an ugly one? Who shares, who shares my interests?

Oh, fucking why? Ideally, the kind of woman who's also a recluse. Okay, so I want a, I want an attractive girl with mental problems. Fairly attractive. Yeah, fairly attractive girl with mental problems. Fairly attractive. Yeah, a fairly attractive girl with mental issues who I can keep in a pumpkin shell. Yeah, right.

Who spends her time on the computer, working on shit or playing video games and is similarly socially retarded. This is the plague of two broken pieces, making a whole one is I think one of the worst lies ever perpetrated in a generation. Oh, sure. Women have eaten it up so entirely that they are proud of the worst parts of them on mass.

Like I would say 50, 60, 70% of women are to find themselves internally by what's fucked up about them instead of being horrified by it. Statistically, there's gotta be one. Statistically, most of them. I just don't know how to meet another hermit. I don't have any friends to ask nor the social skills to make any, but maybe you have some advice for someone like me.

I mean, you're kind of like asking to meet another heroin addict. Like, I do heroin. I'm a big, it's my no my hobbies. I'd, you're kind of like asking to meet another heroin addict. Like, I love, I do heroin. I'm a big, it's my no my hobbies. I'd love to meet a chick who does heroin too. We could heroin it up together. Seems like he has just a hard time like talking to anyone. Yeah.

Maybe my expectations are too high or maybe the kind of woman I'm looking for doesn't exist. They exist, but they're, yeah, well, yeah, it's Lou. Go, you want to meet a chick who's socially retarded and hangs out online all day, talk to Monkey Jones about his ex-buck and girlfriend. You do not want, you do not want that. You do not want everything that's wrong with you

and somebody that you rely on for pussy. Hello, hello, hello, hello. Are you back? Hello. Can you hear me? Yes. We've been, I've been having audio volume problems all day. Sir, you are the host of Dipper Taves. Did I get, is that right?

Yeah. We recently came across your podcast on this show. On this show, we review, we go over podcasts and we're assholes. And somebody sent us yours to review and then we found somebody found your uh... somebody found you on reddit and we really want to know what the fuck's been going on in your life and get to the bottom of this uh... diaper lifestyle

uh... yeah sure i i guess first thing first it's not a 24-7 thing for me. Okay. So some people it is, but I live a pretty normal life half the time and the other half. I actually listened to the thing you guys did. Oh, you did? Yeah, it was pretty funny. It was funny funny thank you but uh...

i said in one part like coming home after hard day you want to just not deal with the bullshit anymore yeah you can kind of regress and do that you know it's like uh... so for me it's definitely not a twenty four seven thing it's a half you can't even half the time but you know i'm saying my name is dick by the way, and this is Sean. I tried to get Carl in, he was on earlier, but he split out.

So what percentage of the time do you think? Like I'm an alcoholic, so I drink probably 30 to 40, maybe 25% of the time in a regular life, but in quarantine it's probably about 40% or 50%. What is your diaper relaxation percentage of your life? Well, the whole king gets called ABDL, right? Which is a dog baby diaper lover. And there's kind of two sides to that there's like the a b side that i think you guys had a hard time wrapping your mind around the

adult baby stuff acting like uh... kid and oh yeah baby talk stuff like that yet we had a hard time wrapping our minds around it not gonna lie that's your the we're not the two parts i mean because we're struggling trying to convince women just to suck our cock and you've got like this entire elaborate thing you're trying to convince them

to do right well i don't know about convinced them to do but uh... part of my show is uh... how to accept yourself so that other people can accept you to you you can be more confident about it uh... you know i eat it's like on a first date you might not tell a girl that you're not going to be you know i you it's like on a first date you might not tell a girl that you're not going to be you know so i think it you know that i've done that on a couple of

uh... who's uh... okay tell me more about that then yeah i've got really comfortable about yourself uh... but the other half the time that

diaper lover, if you will, I mean, I didn't coin that term. It's not probably what I would have termed it, but that's just like people who enjoy the feeling of it and it's like a comfort thing. Why? Why? Yeah, so we had a couple listeners wrote in like last year, saying that they're into vore, which is like being eaten. So this dude and his girlfriend would wrap themselves up in a blanket, and that's how they would get down. Yeah. And it was,

they also said it wasn't completely sexual. But what is it? what is it about diapers that gets you that i don't know whatever scratches that itch what you got to understand to i thought that a lot of it also isn't uh... sexual for a lot of people it's all about the comfort and the relaxation after a long day and uh... just forget about life's worries and a lot of people have a common misconception that it's about like people who are abused as children, I think at one point you guys said like what happened in their lives to have that happen.

Honestly, nothing, it's kind of something, some come on that the set of puberty. Some people just like a, for most people, it's kind of an interest that happens at one point and it's kind of hard to turn away. You know, you see you were not abuse in any way. It's just like a wiring thing. I mean, the first thing I always go to is abuse because I know how many kids get abused. Yeah, in one way or another. Yeah. So you were not abused in any way. anyway and i heard stories of people online into the cancels have been abused and for them i think it can

become more sexual um... because it's tied to that especially if it's sexual abuse so yours isn't sexual at all sorry what is that yours isn't sexual at all your a bdl fetish i mean there's a sexual side to it but it's predominantly not okay

i i mean i've come to me i know it's gonna sound weird not that all of this sounds less weird but uh... the just that act that there's gonna be a diaper rubbing against your pocket like if you're doing like that

change thing there's gonna be somebody who's in your cock area and messing with your private what's that like what's the change that the sexual experience press feeding and stuff can be sexual you know the aspect there can that's uh... i don't know that's a bdl well now you've got a sold dick on the whole concept is that what i got a disorderly cities of ordering a palette full of papers from paul's car right

now what is the changing thing like what kind of stuff do you do to enjoy this fetish with the world that's something that i haven't done i've heard stories and stuff and that i guess that's like the ultimate endgame of a video like your story that i heard the endgame is the diaper changed like

there is an endgame i guess it's that but then it's right back anyway if you're if you're the 24-7 so you've never done it you've never gotten changed not by somebody else now do you do you do you quick guys quick on the street do you have a regular job you have a regular job do you have a regular job do you have a regular job do you have a regular job do you have a regular job do you have a regular job do you have a regular job do you have a regular job and do you wear them going to work

and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work

and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work and do you wear them going to work guys are called you have a normal job uh... i work full-time and i've got a of normal wife and kids and uh... it's oh well it's really a small part of my life but it's something that i

felt other people who are less comfortable with it uh... it's still something that i'm kind of working to be comp confident comfortable with you but you have a wife and kids yeah wow with me, but you have a wife and kids? Yeah, wow. Well, we knew he was married, because it's right. That's interesting. So it's a smaller portion of your life than a lot of people take it, but it's still very

important and it's still part of your identity, right? Yeah, I would say so. And it's something that's been with me since i was a little kid but uh... it's inseparable even though it is a small part of something that no matter what way i went in life who i ended up with they kind of had to be somebody who could ultimately at least not

be weirded out and yeah i'm able to be with me because i am how's that working out because i remember you talked about it on your show where uh... your wife was reddison and then i even saw it kind of bummed me out i saw in reddit you were talking about uh... asking if anybody ever got a divorce because of their a bdl lives are a bdl how is that how is that working out for you right now yeah it's it's getting better.

It's constant communication. You know, some days can be harder than others, especially if you're feeling down and wanting to participate more in that cane. If you will, you have to be there for your wife and your family and your job, and especially during this quarantine and stuff. It's been easier for some people to... Extra stress for others. I mean, I can see a husband who is like really into sports being way more annoying than one who just wants to throw a diaper on after work. Yeah.

And that's screaming at the TV. You just got a little rattle that you pop and over, right? I'm sure I've been more obnoxious. So while drunk, I have pissed on the ground of the bathroom, at least you're wearing a diaper, right? Right. What were you going to say, Sean? No, I was going to say, I'm going to go out on a limb and i would i would guess that

this is not something that you just picked right i mean this was like there's a contest no you win a contest but i mean i have this fetish or this king for whatever you want to call it is definitely not something that i picked like i said when i was maybe five i was sitting on a couch uh... watching a movie and

it kind of just popped in my head like what would it be like to still be wearing diapers and like what more you like a baby and at that point i was just freshly out of that stage of my life i think so more natural to feel that way but for some reason i kind of just never went out of that what movie were you watching do you remember because we're gonna be on the band movie it was the mommy with brain and phrasier i've i've seen the money

pressure but if i had to get maybe what about the money with brendan phrasier wanted you to make you a lot of diamond i'd be correlated at all dick something got to be something the mummy wrapping around his crash looks like a diaper what can I say oh boy I stand corrected okay now but I'm gonna my sister get unlocked something my sister will ban the mummy from being played in her house boy she's got two five-year-old boys uh...

okay do you do you go ahead uh... i was just gonna say i think it's really all about comfort i think the biggest thing is that i didn't come out when my wife and i started dating her uh... anything like that and specifically said like i'll leave you if you can't be into this it's really been a given take up uh... per comfort level in my comfort level and

trying to really go things slow so that you know it's important to remember that how much shit women make us put up with uh... like if they ever if they ever start saying all you know this maybe i want to do this like you know you are you make me do a awful all the reality tv all the stories about work.

My girlfriend is now complaining about her villagers on Animal Crossing that she's having interpersonal conflicts with the virtual characters and that can like, Hey, it's my personal life work. I'm not listening to your problems with virtual people, computer people. Right. That's over the line.

Bring me my line. Yes. Bring me my diapers. Yes. Bring me my diapers. Did you teach your kids to potty train somebody wanted to know in the chat? I think they're being, I think they're just joking. Okay. Jesus.

Well, I got, oh, so I'm sorry. There were two youngs for that, but I'm not planning to involve kids in any way. There's kids are in no way involved in this. It's something that i plan and everybody who's into this should keep it in from their kids and so there was uh... there was a check on your show or maybe maybe carl just found i think he found another yeah there was a woman who did it and it was uh...

your she was really creeping me out like she was talking about pissing herself and seem to be she's without a dipper she'll just like wet is she was really creeping me out. Like she was talking about pissing herself. Yeah. She's without a diaper, she'll just like wet, wherever like between the bathroom and the closet where she's gonna close. Like, I mean, is that really deal with that? Well, she is one of those 24-7 wearer

that she kind of does the same thing that I do except in a YouTube video form, which I don't do for privacy reasons, but I think it's good that there's resources on the podcast front, on YouTube front, on Reddit, on just the different resources there. When I was a kid and first figuring out about this nothing like that was out there so helpful that people can have those resources whether they do have a normal life and just do this on the side

yeah feel comfort or if they're a twenty four seven where they're just thought first up in their head in their like it is something that makes me crazy or is it something other people have thought of her i mean it's crazy but what is it well but you also that if you thought of it so has someone else i mean i

chances are that's a six hundred dollar video game system just like it's he's t-fixing like what's that's not enough crazy uh... that's the bad part man i was uh... kid thinking that i was so original coming up with this idea myself but and the internet came and everyone thought of it yeah

now how did this how did this kind of i just want to hold on i guess uh... at my uh... fuck face is saying in the chat that you dodge the the uh... parental molestation question i don't think you did i think he said no he didn't get there was no abuse at all right and i write in that yeah definitely no abuse at all right and i write in that yeah yeah definitely no use at all yeah go go ahead and close it normal childhood uh... my my parents

there was never a uh... monthly weekly daily checks and i think you guys were saying on the podcast it was uh... we were spippable i think i didn't really stop and when i said they were checking every couple hours is like when we were at a location where i could reasonably

you know that i don't know that only from like well yeah i don't think to a liquor store you keep your eye on me yeah right if i go to a wedding and there's an open bar i'm getting counted i know that half the people that have to be blind other is a little movie to take care of the shinnir pockets uh... i think he just I'm getting counted. I know that half the people I know there have those little movie ticker things in their pockets. I think you just clip that. I'll see if he calls back in. There he is.

There you go, you're back. Yeah, start losing again. Yeah, half the people I know have those little little movie clicker things like the drug coach. Click that's one drink. That's two drinks. This guy's trouble. Well, you were saying something, weren't you Sean?

I was gonna say, yeah, how did you, did you have younger siblings in the house who had diapers because I would imagine, no, I would imagine that you would want access to them. So I know you brought up a story about the neighbors. Can you, you know, expound upon that a little bit? Yeah, it actually wasn't the neighbors that I was talking about.

I said, another family, there was the neighbors that i thought i said uh... another family that there is that another family that was staying with us for a while and they had uh... children uh... you thought jackpot now i'm it i got a fresh supplier right here in the house right was a part of you happy about that uh... initially but but after a while, it's something that they're

shame and try and suppress, but after a while, and then if there's something there, it's like an alcoholic, and then if they're trying to quit, but there's alcohol stashed away, they know where it's at. After so many days, they're probably gonna go looking for it. Yeah, yeah, that's true. Yeah, get themselves Yeah, and at that age you don't really understand the whole Like addiction fedation anything like that. It's just about This is what I'm feeling right now. This is what I want right now, you know, yeah Do you guys have meetups because there's a huge amount of you. There's like 30,000 people in your subreddit.

Wow. Do you have conventions where all the developer people, there's a lot more than you'd think. Yeah. Yeah, there is meetups and conventions and little lunch meetings and certain, yeah. Like I said, different communities on different websites. And I think a lot of people have the feeling of when they were younger, they felt a little

fuck you breaking up. Well, you can see that. I mean, you can, it was, it would be, give you, you know, like a sense, you got a lot of responsibilities as an adult and things to stress you out. And I mean, it's just, honestly, it's the easiest thing to understand in the world. And all this weird sex shit that everybody makes fun of, I'm like, uh, what, what, what, what, what, I mean, life sucks. Like, look, what is the deal?

Is he still there? I don't know. He might have cut out for him. Yeah, he's still there. Oh, he was just still there. What I was gonna say, at the end of the day, who gives a shit, what you do if you're not hurting anybody else? I mean, this is a pretty benign kink to have.

Yeah, it's funny, but yeah, sure. It's just because it's so odd, you know, for the normal person to understand. Definitely. I mean, I host a podcast and preach except Vincent. Everyone who's into that should definitely feel okay with themselves, but I think that it's a silly thing and it's abnormal for sure

which is why there is podcast and people have to talk about how to talk to your significant other about it and how to feel confident about it it's definitely weird you know i don't make it bad yeah it's just very it's just very different but now uh... i'm from the other side right think, I think that I'll tolerate it. I do not want, I have no acceptance and that everyone should feel bad about themselves

no matter what. Like, whatever you're into, if you're, you should feel bad about it and you who is not into that, you should feel bad about yourself from other reasons. Like, there's no, there's no one should be feeling good at all. But, you know, that's just my, that's how I get that alcoholic brain. Yeah, that's why he drinks.

What was I going to say? I'm trying to get good. Did we, did we establish, I don't, from, from his podcast? Do you, do you use the diapers? Oh, yeah. Good question, Sean. Yeah, I do for one, but not two. Right, not two. Okay, I can, yeah, okay.

That's the reason a bull, if you're going to use them, yeah. Okay, have you met any real weirdos doing your podcast? I'm not doing my podcast, but in general, I mean, I don't know if like real weird us in terms that I would use, but there's definitely people who extremists are hardcore. Yeah, and I, I mean, more power to some of them, but there's people who are like 24 seven by per slaves and they live in like a crib and some do towels and just orthodontics like maybe 24-7 like it's a little much for me but if that's what

they're into they're happy they found someone who's into that too more power to on my guess yeah have you ever gotten a therapy for this uh... yeah what did they how did that out? I don't think therapy works at all. It's a big scam. How did it work for you? I'm here. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm feeling, but for all therapists have been pretty okay with this. They've understood. Yeah. And they've had kind of a stance that it's not hurting anybody else. And if it's making you happy, why not? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's the only way i can see it there's your wife have any rules like no and uh... any kind of boundaries like uh... uh... i don't know it seems like

something there this might come up with all this honestly that's the biggest thing that like the only real reason i've even brought up on the podcast is that trying to respect boundaries of uh... like she's not into it. It's not her thing, which I accept.

So I wear pants on top so that she doesn't have to see it. That's a reasonable compromise, but she can hear it, I would imagine. I'm sure she can sometimes. I try and keep that down and be respectful as much as possible. I'm trying to think of how I disguise my drinking to make it more palatable for people around me. Shuffle vodka bottle up your ass. Do you have any advice?

We've got a bunch of people who listen to the show who are virgins and they're trying to get laid for the first time and some of them are taking a lot longer than others. Do you have any advice for the virgins who might be listening on how to how to hit on women? I mean you're working at a significant disadvantage, I would say Or do you have any disadvantage? Yes, because you've also got this. I kind of have to disagree. I think If you're into something like this you can definitely find your community and find somebody else who's into it. And it's easier than ever to date with the internet the way it is. I think the hardest way to go is the way that I went. I mean, I love my wife a lot, which is why I'm doing it.

But a regular person. If you find somebody and you're trying to help them understand and accept this part of you then it's going to be a lot harder than if you try and find somebody who's already into it. So are there chicks in the ABDL community? How many? I mean I'm in the drinking community and the magic gathering community and there's not a lot of women in those communities.

No, there's not, but in the ABDL communities it's maybe not 50-50, but maybe like 75-25. That's pretty high, 70-30? It's not maybe higher. I think some of the surveys have shown that it's significantly higher than that, but I think men are more likely to reach out and shown that it's significantly higher than that but i think men are more likely to reach out and uh... show themselves online and say you know women have tended to be more into themselves and shy about the side of themselves

oh man i bet some of these will often come to get a woman into this like a guy who's already in the hello women about and to be like yeah it's either this or fucking my dog so i bet there are what's that

i thought play is no so these versions can try the diaper life try to infiltrate the community or whatever they're into find the community. Well, we already got a good one here, you know, just be into it. Okay. How hard could it be? Well, I'm gonna try it. We should do a whole show. It's done type. Yeah, I don't let me see if I had any more questions here. What do you think of Donald Trump? You think he's the greatest president we ever? He would just die per lover. Yeah. God, I don't know. Everything else you kind of talked about on your podcast that I wanted to ask about. The Escorts, the ABDL Escorts, do you think they're

really into it? That seemed a little predatory to me. Do we lose him? I think we might have lost him. Hello, check, check. Predatory from the S-squared system. Yes, yes, yes. Yeah, we lost him. Let's see if he calls in again. What do you say? There it is. I'm very, any answered all the questions.

Yeah, I did. Yeah. Nice guy. Interesting. He comes off. I know it's like it's hard talking in just by yourself on, you know, on a podcast or something that you're gonna put out. He comes off a lot more, I don't know, a lot more confident or just a lot more, you know, like he's got his thoughts together when he's just talking to another person. Maybe more than he's driving.

Yeah, oh, I thought he just say he stepped away. It was driving. Oh It was on the podcast. Yes. Yes. Very well spoken. I think listen to the show. How funny is that? And he, yeah.

I don't know. I don't remember. I hope we weren't too hard on him, but like he gets a lot of jokes. I mean, you know, which as, as you're going to do. Yeah. Anyway, he gets it. He doesn't think it like it's completely normal run of the mill. So he seems to understand it. Yeah, he does. Alcoholism hurts way more people than

diaper stuff. And that's exactly why we accepted. I don't think diapers don't really hurt anybody. Get a yeast infection. Dipper rash. Dipper rash. Let's see, maybe my expectations back to this guy are too high or maybe the kind of woman I'm looking for doesn't exist, but doing the nice guy thing obviously hasn't worked out so far. I don't really know if you're a nice guy. Anytime somebody says they're nice, I just reject it out of hand.

Yeah. Like what do you mean nice? I don't understand that word. It's a broad stroke. You're inoffensive? Yeah, what do you mean? What do you mean? I don't understand that word. It's a broad stroke. You're inoffensive? Yeah, what do you mean? What do you mean?

You don't go out of your way to harm people? Yeah. That's not nice. Do you? No, I know. How much of your time do you dedicate to charity and why? Like what specifically about you have you identified with as nice and why?

That is that always trips me up. It probably will continue to be devil me. If you want, feel free to read this on air. Probably you've got a lot of dateless weirdos listening to your show. Just don't say my email address. You got it. You got this, I think your feminist upbringing has taught you this idea that you need to look for yourself in women.

And in fact, you've defined yourself by all the broken components, which is, I would not do. That seems to be feminism's mo is this is what's wrong. This is what's, these are the inequalities between us. We need to make us the same. We need to take everything that's wrong with each side and we need to equal out what's wrong with, like I'm focusing on everything that's wrong with men

and everything that's wrong with women and those things need to be equal. And it's just a really fucked up way to live and look at your life. You need to find, you should find, you might want to try alcohol. Alcohol, you might wanna try finding someone who is better than you, does not have these things

that you're looking for at least has the good parts of you, not the bad ones. Find someone who you can embrace for the goodness in you and the goodness of them and try to help each other fix the bad parts that you do not have in common. Or the alcohol, either one, probably as equal rates of return. I don't know. The science is still out on that one.

This is from, you have any advice for this guy? No, I was going to say, I think you just gave very good advice right there. You don't look for other people with the bad qualities that you see in yourself. But unless he's, you know, he seems to be somewhat self-aware. A lot of people are afraid of introspection and they don't really know necessarily or have studied the bad parts of themselves. So you know, they do do that, the bad parts and other people. So fucked up people make, you know, have, get with fucked up people. But it's like you should want like, you should want to,

you should want to work on those bad parts and seek out somebody who's healthier than you and strive to, or else, why are you dating for sex? Yeah. I mean, that's fine. I'm not gonna judge you, but why do you want this inside? He says socially retarded. That's the giveaway that he understands that it's bad. This is from Matt Fuckface. Hey, Dick Matt Fuckface here. Congrats says socially retarded. That's the giveaway that he understands that it's bad. This is from Matt Fuckface. Hey, dick, Matt Fuckface here. Congrats on the 200 episodes.

That's almost 100 good ones all every time. Every fucking time there's some kind of slam in the compliments. Here's to 200 more. I have a bit of a follow-up advice after I wrote in about that girl in December. After I wrote in, I saw her a handful of times over winter break. Last of which, we went out alone together. We hung out and got food. I had a great time with her. I know she did too. Very confident. Only thing is, nothing really happened. Well, you didn't touch her? What, Matt, can you be more specific about nothing really happened? What didn't really happen? After that, she's not a third party that comes in and makes things happen. Okay, you got to do it. You know, I mean, that's cut, yeah.

Nothing happened, things don't happen. You do things. That's life. You did, you did these things, you said these things. I'm fine with that. After she went back to school, we kind of went our separate ways for a bit. I tried to focus my attention elsewhere.

The thing that women are not, they're not, no one's looking to make moves. That's what you do for them. You know what, we're both here. I'm gonna make the move. How about that? That's the thing I can do for you that will pay me dividends for the rest of my fucking life. I tried to focus my attention elsewhere,

and I had basically no luck at all for about a month and a half. She was pretty upset. I was gonna be away in LA when she was home for spring break. Oh, this was for, and then comes Marshall Loll. All the schools get shut down. Hers included and she sent,

and she's sent back home for at least for next fall. Wow, Matt was gonna come to the show instead of hooking up with this, that's good move though. Cause then he looks cool. He's at the show talking to people, looking cool with older people, that's cool. Since maybe a week before she got back, we've been talking every day. We've been out alone three times

since she got back, buddy, you better be. And I'm basically the only other human she's seen in four weeks that isn't related to her. Her pussy boyfriend is too afraid to leave the house. Because of the fucking quarantine? Oh my God, doesn't drive and lives an hour away by public transportation, which she isn't taking to avoid getting sick.

Thank you, social dis. Also, one of our mutual friends told me that she's been complaining to her constantly about how unhappy she is in her relationship, but says she has no intention of breaking it off when pressed. Yeah, women don't do that. Women don't do these things. You keep saying, expecting them to do.

Your expectations do not match reality. That is not reality's fault. Yeah, he doesn't know. Yeah, he doesn't know. They don't do that. They react women are reactors In both ways that I mean that I suspect she's too afraid to make the decision. It's just not it's not how they think She doesn't really talk much about their relationship to me. Thank God. That means she wants to fuck you But more to the point. what do I do about it? Do I continue doing what I'm doing

and just play the waiting game, spending time alone with her? Or do I tell her flat out that I'm into her and let her make a decision? Okay, they don't make decisions. Women do not make decisions. That's why they have a closet full of 10,000 shoes and why a man has one. They don't make decisions. They make options available to themselves. That's how they improve their lives by keeping as many options available as possible and letting the one that they and deciding

slowly letting the one that serves them best bubble to the surface over time. That's how they've done it for hundreds of thousands of years. It's how they will do it until the end of time. But more to the point, what do I do about it? Yeah, let her make a decision. Do not let them make the decision. Aside from making sign-filled references about three-sums at her. That worked for Jerry with two women. Right. It didn't work for George with the man. Right. This is, you're making the wrong one. You pick the wrong one.

Learn from Costanza. Maybe I should be focusing my attention on other girls. Always do that. Well, you can do both. You can absolutely do both. But that's basically your fault for the road rage LA debacle. I was counting on that never count on me either.

Thanks, I'm an uncle, not a dad. Thanks in all seriousness. By the way, I have better hair now. Go fuck yourself. They can't. If you find yourself thinking that you're waiting for her to make a move or a decision, you are done. That's it, check out, turn the system off,

let it tell you you didn't do it properly, because you didn't. All right, everybody, this is the next shot. So we have anything else? Is anybody else in here that I told the colon? Oh, I don't think so, but. The doctor man was great. Yeah, though, this is the next. So we have anything else? Is anybody else in here that I told the colon? Oh, I don't think so, but. The doctor man was great. Yeah, though, that's, that's great.

He called in. Let's, let's, let's that Kiwi Chris colon. Oh, man, I really wanted to talk about homeschool. We'll talk about it next week. There he is. Chris the Kiwi, how are you? How are you, Dic, girl? Yeah, I'm doing great.

You sound wonderful. So I hear the... My skype's always on the floor, isn't it? Your Skype is always the best. You have the best audio quality of anyone who calls it easy. Must be the Australian Skype. They were better software down there or something. See, you want to talk about the...

Well, hooker? You want to talk about a hooker? Okay. Yeah, well, I came to visit here for the second time, but the advice I want to ask you is, if I want to try and separate your business from your personal life, how do I get in there and no strings attached, can you sort of answer that one or not? Wait a minute. So you want to turn your hooker into a girlfriend?

Yeah, is that possible or not? So you want to turn your hooker into a girlfriend? Yeah, is that possible or not? Yes, it's not only possible, but that's what every hooker wants. Yeah, like they're not. So how do I go about it then? How do I go about it? They don't get social security.

It's they all just find guys. There's no old whores home. Yeah, there's no old whores home. So if they're doing that for money, why would they want to help you? How would it be possible to actually turn it into a relationship though? Well, what's a relationship to you?

I don't know. Just spending time together watching TV, watching movies, I guess, you know? Yeah. And how is she going to live off that? She can't pay her rent with watching movies right Yeah, no, so what do you think it's possible then? So she's looking for a guy who has a lot of money. Is that what you say maybe but is she looking to like? I mean hookers don't want to be in the hooking game

Is she looking why why why the one? Yeah, cuz women don't like having sex with guys period They definitely don't like having it whenever they women don't like having sex when you want it. That's why Why? Why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, They eat telling the truth. Yes, they need to eat. That's why they call prostitution the world's oldest profession because cave women needed to eat so they would put out to get food that men went out and killed. You ever heard that before? Okay.

Yeah. So are they necessarily looking for a guy who's got money though? Well, women are complicated. Does she have any other options, like vocational options? Well, I know that she's going to mortgage her net house and I gave her a bottle of wine for the second time and after we did what we did. Well, she shaved me at the door and she shaved me her dogs and so I got to see her house and also how she lives and stuff like that.

Yeah, and the dogs. Have you ever seen Pretty Woman? Yeah. The movie with Richard Geer? Yeah. Yeah. Is that kind of... Oh, sorry.

I feel a little bit, but I haven't actually watched it. Yeah. Maybe you should watch that movie, because that's all about turning a hooker into a girlfriend. Yeah, I might do that, but is that real life? I probably have that. Yes. For some people.

Yes, I think an overwhelming amount of women are in the sex industry who then get boyfriends and get out of it. That's their plan, eh? Yeah. So, about all the stuff on the Twitter, like there's a few people messing with me, did I see those messages about guy thinking, Jesse, those things, thinking you're a transender? Oh yeah, there's a lot of people who hate me, Chris.

I'm sure they've said everything, so what's your plan with the hooker? I'm not really too sure. I mean, what's your advice to me? What do you think I should do? See if she wants to get out of the game. Try to look for signs to see if she wants to get out of hooking. She'll probably have some kind of a plan B. You know, she's not getting any younger. I actually, I sent her a message asking

her, she's got a boyfriend, but she hasn't replied. And I said, I enjoy my time spent with the and she didn't reply that. So, what does should just like what is not replied me and like I know you're pretty quick on the reply game Well, maybe she's a specie she she does find me, but I'm I'll just Just play by ear and see what she says. Yeah, do that. Don't good don't start insulting her or threatening her really quickly Just give it yeah, give it a minute. Give it a minute Yeah, and then if you see if you can get out of her, what her plans are post-hooking, I guess. See if she's got any. Because you guys have a pretty generous welfare system down there, don't you?

Yeah, we do. Yeah. But unfortunately, I'm a bit worried that what the Australian government want to do, I mean, this sort of seemed to be taught in there. Well, funny enough, they gave me 750 bucks because of the economy about the coronavirus. They gave the Australian government, they gave me 750 bucks, that's pretty good. Yeah. That is. Has the US government, I think the US government did that? Didn't I? Or something?

Or a lot of people? Yeah, they gave everybody 1200 Trump bucks. How's your, what's your opinion of the pandemic like now that you, I remember last time you called in, I think you said that Jews caused it. Was that him? Yeah. And that your Kabab shop was shut down. Has your opinion of it changed a lot?

I think it, well, my friend Chris Savage, the guy who I'm talking to the X coffee is an ex on the Philip PNC He did a video and he pleased it's a great big hoax and And it's just Yeah, well, I believe that but I mean Yeah, well, I believe that but I mean, they're doing everything these days like they're trying to like make all sorts of weird names for different viruses and shit like that. And you could ask yourself why they do it, you know? Why making names for viruses? What do you mean?

Trying to confuse us. I mean, there's different names for it. I mean, there's so many different viruses out there. It's not funny, like, I mean, the always, the always seem to be a beating something. Do you know this? I mean, there's a lot of, yeah, there's a lot of viruses. They mutate pretty quickly. Do you think they're just making different names to confuse us?

Yeah, yeah. Just, um, this lot of different medications are always putting out a medication for a different psychiatric illness. It's just like that. But there's only actually one. They just rebound it and they name them different things, but they're all just a chalk in the day. What is sugar pills?

What is the medication? I saw you spreading a bunch of like brown substance on your arm. What was that medication? That was, that's not really a prescription medication. That's like an undergraduate, alternate medicine, it's just like hiding, hiding, hiding supplementation.

Okay. Okay. What did you think of the guy who called in just a second ago who wears diapers to relax? I don't actually, I don't think I can listen to your share life because I'm not on Patreon. Oh, well this guy called in who just, he wears diapers to relax.

He's an adult man and he wears diapers to relax and there's a lot of other diaper-wearing people. And he pees in them. And he pees in them. That's like, that's like, Cuck isn't it, really? That's a Cuck? Yeah, that sounds like a Cuck to me.

By big diaper? Yeah. No, a Cuck is only supporting a woman financially who's not faithful to you. I'll match you, I'll match you, my season, the definition. Yeah. What do you think? Would you ever wear it, consider wearing adult diapers to relax? Like, do you think there might be anything to that?

I should know, that's two. I mean, it's just, that's really a manly. You know? So have you heard much from best dental ritual? Not really? No, I haven't heard anything from Dr. Rachel. But the Chris can't cast his back, right? Yeah, I was willing to give can't tell you the stuff of a chance. But the thing is, the thing that you have to understand that he has to like not put anything like all the bad stuff, bad stuff that was like that in the past,

like all those songs that were like really negative towards me, I'm just trying to focus, make it positive, not sort of negative, you know, like the to chopping stuff like that, you know. Yeah, no, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not you know? Yeah. No, not that. All right, Chris, I'm going to end the show. I'm tired, but I'm going to listen to the Chris can't cast as soon as I get off of here. Okay, bye. All right, bye, bye. Cheers, bye, bye.

Trying to turn a hooker into a housewife, Sean. Yeah. I hate to tell them no, because I don't believe it in my heart. All right, everybody, this is Mddick Show. dick.showpatreon.com slash the dick. So see you next Tuesday. This is MC Jorbo. He did an Idubs song now.

I think, let me make sure it is. I love my girlfriend. There it is. I got only five. Only fans, damn. You're jacking off to pictures of her on the internet. See you next Tuesday. If you are upset by me admitting this, listen to f**k up.

I love my girl. Love my girl. So f**king bad. I let her sleep her t** for 50 cents. I don't get mad. I just have some mommy tissue she has. Problems with her dad. So I grabbed a box of tissue.

Say hello. They're Mr. Hand on man I'm totally familiar with masturbation from dudes who are fascinated by camhors living with a cancer patient This shit's pretty basic, you just gotta fucking embrace it and build a man of the house For example, listen to this shit, I'm facing no more kissing without first asking for an admission Ian, you bitch ass in that kitchen Ian, listen Ian, she's always on only fans So I find my face Get in here

How much of her pussy? I gotta show you out Oh my gosh, I love my girl so fucking bad But why she spread her face? Get into the chat room You know what, I've seen enough of that crap Time to file a DMCA Hey, just call me Monday, Matt. Huh? Damn bitch, look at all of this.

Damage. Only fans, magic your ass. Get your ass in the live show chat. Bitch, stoop your dick inside your fucking house. Where are you? Quick, I cops give not a shit. You nut over his stupid bitch. Only fans, dip this switch. Grab your wallet, click click click. Get the camera. Click click click. Outcome the dick dick pics. I respect the trip trip. Which grab your wallet, click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click click to be what I'm seeing. You ain't protecting fuck. Hello, are you there? Are you there, Matt? What did I just

done? What did you just say in the chat? What did I just hear? Um, so I should tell her. Tell her.

Why would you tell her? What do you want from this girl? Do you want a nice conversation? Um, I'm not really sure. He's thinking that will lead to, if he, he'll, he'll know one way or another if he tells

her, right? I want, I want you to tell me what you want from this girl. Um, possibly a relationship, I guess. Pop. I want you to, so you want a relationship. No, don't you do it for him, Sean. But he knows. No, he doesn't know.

I don't, I don't, knowing doesn't mean shit. Unless it's action, it doesn't mean shit. I want you to know. I want you to wait. I want you to pause for one second. And I want you to pretend that you're not guessing and that you're sure of it. I want you to tell yourself that you're sure

of what you want. I don't care what it is. I don't care what it is. You just, you want, you just want to fucker that's fine. But I want you to put into words what you want and I want to hear that you're sure about it. Tell me what you want from this girl. Okay, I want a relationship.

There you go. Yeah. Okay. He was, he was afraid that he was going to get a little bit of backlash if he said that. I could tell. I'm not working against you. He's, he was thinking of daddy dick chastising him a little bit of backlash if he said that. I could tell. I'm not working against you. He was thinking of daddy dick chastising him a little bit.

Oh no, no, no, no. I've got a relationship for. You think I'm gonna be harder than that some girl? No. Oh, no fucking way. She could be, they wither you with a look, with a scoff. What did you say, Matt? No, nothing, that's it.

You're gonna tell her that? Is that what you're gonna go with? I guess, yeah, that's what I'm doing, yeah. Don't guess. If you tell her anything, if you're gonna tell her anything, do not guess, you sure about it. You're sure about it. If you're sure about it, they're sure about it. That's how it works.

If you're not sure, they're not fucking sure. Because where are you gonna be? If you're just guessing, where are you gonna be tomorrow? Say, bitch, I'm fucking sure about this. I'm fucking sure this is what I want. Of course, you could leave tomorrow. That's entirely, but you gotta be sure. Doesn't mean you have to stay sure. It doesn't mean you have to stay sure. You don't even have to want a relationship, man. But whatever you do, be sure about it. That's good advice. No more guessing, no more questioning it.

Think it in your head, you could have your doubts in your head, but when that comes out of your mouth, you're fucking sure. You got it? Yeah, get out of here. All right, go fuck yourself. All right, go fuck yourself. Get the showers.

Yeah, get out of here. Couple of voicemails, let's do it. the showers you get out of couple of us mails let's do it yes you're god we didn't read i wanted to read maddox's article you know bonus episode this week yeah we need to do one for a real don't we yeah sure we could do uh... let me check my schedule maddox had a bonus episode in here that awful bob dillian article that i want read uh... here you go

hey here's a mystery rage. I just saw a sign that said a hero lives here outside of some fucking up-to-use house with a medical heart thing, like the local doctor looked a lot of fucking out. I'm assuming that's where it was, at least. I don't think it was for veterans or whatever. But what? Dude, I'm driving home from work right now. I'm a fucking janitor. Am I a hero? I come to contact with people every fucking day. I don't have this pretentious air about me.

Well, I'm not making TikToks. I mean, dancing. I'm fucking way there. You think janitors are making TikToks? I don't think so. To blow off steam. Probably not. No. No. They got to saying, if you have time to lean, you have time to clean. Right.

They don't have that for doctors. No. I don't. Yeah, I mean, if that's a, you know, you got time to do the wife get it for her husband or it was it just like, yeah, you're not supposed to go around like describing yourself as an intellectual. That's what somebody says about, you know what I mean?

That's the pretence is embarrassing. You know what? I got it. If you got me, I'm the hero. If you got time to drive, you got time to save lives. There you go. That's for nurses and doctors. Speaking of talking about yourself as a hero,

Lacey posted this picture on her Instagram and her caption, her text part of it was a quote about how beautiful a woman let me pull it up. This is what she put. She posted herself. Hold on, let me find it. It's too good. Lacey Lotties. Yeah, here it is. It's her and a bikini, right? Yeah. And the way she, her from behind in a bikini, and she posted, nothing prettier in the world

than a girl in love with every breath she takes, heart, and she attributed the quote to someone named Atticus. I said, so you're posing a quote about how there's nothing prettier in the world than you. Is that? Well, because she loves every breath. That's the beautiful part. That's not what the quote says.

Yeah. Here we go. Hey, Dix, hey, Shar. Hey, you only see to reach these fucking acts? I'm not used to bugs in my house, but these bugs, I don't know where the fuck they're coming from. There are these ants outside wings and I can't find their hive or their nest or whatever I do the kinds of walls or the fucking coming through to the windows of the subject it's always in my fucking computer room that they always come through it comes in the same

fucking way I put I put I spray my whole fucking room that fucking computer room with you can spray the room and I'm outside I know they're like ant it traps and like it seems to like kill the ants for them to like go back or whatever yeah I don't work yeah you need that legit gray around the perimeter of the house I don't know where the crazy I'll look a little bit outside I'll find a house like don't see any entryway. I'll look inside of the corner where it runs. So you come up.

Don't see anything. I have a no idea where the hell they're coming from. Outside. It just makes me a fucking rage. There it is. So, I basically took a 1960s and you spray your whole house with just this, this guy's saying, yeah, you don't, don't you know what it's coming from.

You can't see in that fucking room, it's just feel like you're on the way. They like it on, they like it on. It doesn't matter where they're coming from. It's fucking room. But it's fucking, the guy that's flying ants, that's not gonna be flies. No, they're flying ants.

Yeah, get some legit, you know, professional spray or whatever and go around and fucking hose the entire perimeter of your house, right on that, yeah. Easy. Look at that shit up. Okay, let's see. Here we go. Education on D.F. I didn't know that I was going to do this because it's too early in the week and it's not going to go on the show but

uh... second call in and raging to your voice mail is one of the only things keeping me from killing a motherfucker i did let's say it's way art i'm sorry to grocery store you could say say that right now i'm on my little red square is to be apart from the other red squares yeah old man and in line behind me comes over like real close

Want to put a shit on the little conveyor belt. So I scoot forward. I put a little divider little divider stick like hey You know this is my side that's your side. You keep your shit over there. Yeah, right? That's my side. That's your side. Keep your shit over there. Yeah. Right. What's fucking care? If you've got a mask on, you have a guy's got a mask on, the cashier's got a mask on, I fucking don't. Yeah. Cashier looks at the both of us standing too close, and now I'm standing too close to the third guy. I've got it checking out. Does he push to go over?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I touched that thing. I touched it. I'm scared. I look at her. I look at you guys. It's a bother. You guys, it doesn't bother me. They both said, it's OK.

We don't mind. It's just my second. And she flipped the fuck out thing. I don't know. I don't know anything. Come on, you don't respect yourself so best at it. Like, can we take us back and wonder, like maybe if somebody's not doing what I want them to do and what society wants them to do, but I shouldn't grind everything to a fucking halt.

I mean, she's just making the phone line the exposure. No, no, no. Now we need self-checkout. That's what we need. There's a lot more self-checkouts in the stores that I've been seeing. Yeah, really? Yeah. Thank God. Last few months, I've seen them put them in. Oh, okay. Here's a guy. Holy shit, Dick. Fucking throw out martial light. It is literally fucking martial law at my university okay i just got an email from a university and legal services say now if you have any of the other university you are really going to be charged

almost a grand and you can say that 90 fucking days in jail oh and if you just don't have to comply you know don't need the satisfaction of the officers the bus to your fucking house. They can just take you to jail right on the fucking spot. I'm really, I'm really, now cannot leave my house and have to worry about getting seen by a cop now. Going out of my house.

There's an auto-fucking university. I think I'm not to have this fucking home alone party. This is an old film. You know, I've all these fucking extravagant parties. It's fucking like a bustling and popping from the street. Go ahead, we'll hop to my fucking Dorian cop. Come on in, it's just myself and my other fucking dolls. I'm gonna waste all the fucking time I can. Be funny, film it.

Hey, film it. Go fuck yourself. Please film it. Did you see those cops that kicked in that guy's door in the UK? No, I didn't see what was, it's these, they, you know, ram in his door. And then one of the chick and charge is telling him that they broke in to make sure that he wasn't,

that he wasn't having a party. It was just him. And he's like, get the fuck out of my house. The fuck are you guys doing like, sir, calm down? We're here to make sure we had a report that there was some kind of a party going. Why did you start on level seven by ramming in his door, level nine?

There's a lot of cops. Like, how about like a knock? Yeah. Like a fucking, like no, fuck off. Not letting you in. Well, no, but the talk to you through the fucking door, you can at least not start the situation at hey, they just fucked they fucked up his door and then they're like, well, we're sorry, we're out of here.

And he's got look at my fucking door. It's all kicked in and fucked up. So now he's got to go pay how much do you like an apartment door? How much is that to replace? And they just, they walk off, to go all three of them standing right next to each other going around. Okay, let me see. Hey, Dick, self-heading Mexican. Oh, hi. Got a rage for you.

You've done fuck sites like Rubhug or DoorDash or UberEats or some other dumb shit that allow you to say that allow you to not request napkins or utensils or shit. And it's always something with, it's always couple of some type of snarky message about, oh, I don't need napkins or utensils. I'm trying to save a year. I'm gonna fuck you and fuck me up. If I want to destroy napkins and utensils, I'm trying to save the earth. I'm gonna fuck you and fuck the earth. If I want to destroy the napkins and utensils. The environment or the core of recent shit, it's my own goddamn business if I'm ordering

ramen. But what does that have to do with that? You guys weren't 100% on napkins and the utensils before you started. Before you started randomizing it. You kinda, I've missed too many, I've eaten too much Chinese food with no soy sauce. I know, oh. To know that there is no, or Indian food

with no garlic sauce. Yeah. There are Middle Eastern food with no garlic sauce. To know that there doesn't need to be additional steps in this process. Yeah, you'll probably leave it out anyway. It's the same reason why sometimes if I don't like something on a burger,

I just, I won't have them leave it off because of too many times I've had them leave other things off that I wanted on there. I'll pick the tomato off. Ain't that big a deal. Anytime I see somebody ordering like with a slight change, I think, man, you are. Asking for it. You're an idiot. Yeah, that's asking for it. No, it's too bad that you have to do that. Well, what you do. But you do because of who you're dealing with. I don't think one fork. How many forks do we have to not eat to protect the invite?

Like is that what the guy here is? I think that's what I think that's. I think that's way down the list. I think industrial equipment, like there's factories right now that just have in China. Yeah. They had a quota. They had to use up a certain amount of energy to get manufacturing back going. So they just turned on factories to make them go, even though everyone was locked down and say, don't worry about the forks.

Don't worry about the fucking forks. You stupid cunts. All right, maybe everybody's calling in about the virus because it's, or I guess martial law, not many people are affected by the virus. Here we go, this is a good one about jokes. Hey, Dick, Hey, Sean. Sorry.

I'm a crack-fectant. You know, make me a rage this week. When sometimes you're telling a trick a joke or a group of people to joke and let's be honest, not all of them land as well as you would like. And she doesn't get a joke. And so she's like, what? And then like, yeah, never mind, let's move on. You're not smart enough for this joke.

Tell me. Bitch, trust me, there's nothing more embarrassing than having to explain in joke. Having to explain the retarded ass joke for you. And then you just look at me the same way. You made a reference that you think everybody would do it. You go like an idiot and I have better material than that. Anyway, go fuck yourself.

If you just laugh when other people are laughing, you know. Well, that's people will criticize you for like, oh, you didn't get that you just laughed, but you saved everybody a bunch of time by doing that thing. You did. So, sitcoms tell you when to laugh. Yeah. And how hard to laugh.

And really, you got the joke. Like, the laughter was the intended reaction. It doesn't really matter that you didn't understand why you're laughing. You know, you're laughing long with everybody else. All right, everybody, see you next Tuesday. See ya.