The Dick Show - Episode 217 - Dick on Wonder Bread

Episode Date: July 28, 2020

Dealing with the Garbage Store, diversity in serial killing with Mike from Sword and Scale, The Wonder Bread fetish guy calls in to explain himself, Gavin McInnes sends me a rude text, Mersh does a Macho Man impression, face mask stats, seeing my dad's penis, what Ari's boobs feel like, Lena Dunham, virtual fans, Trader Jose's, white women showing off their gooch, and Digi-Nee might chop off his penis; all that and more this week on The Dick Show

Oh man, I kind of. What is this shirt? This shirt, it's about burgers and freedom. This is Abraham Lincoln, French fries. Actually Abraham Lincoln. Yeah, that's Abraham Lincoln. It's some chain in Lincoln, Nebraska. Really?

It actually is a burger joint? Yeah, it's good too. It's real good. Probably, well, I mean, it's Nebraska, right? Aren't they? Courts and beef. Yes. Like all that kind of, you know, you think it'd be...

So gin butter. Yeah. And they all eat all the time. So there's good as L.A. is at talking about itself. They are at making shitty hamburgers. They known for, you know, like offensive lineman like three three hundred and fifty pound giant white farmboys Mm-hmm eating that shit Big boys. Yeah guy knew from Nebraska was about

120 pounds soaking wet Yeah, I like that term soaking wet. Yeah 120 pounds soaking wet. Yeah, like 120 pounds soaking wet. Yeah, I guess if you're wearing your clothes when you get tossed in, it would make a little bit of a difference. Yeah. But if you weren't, probably no one matter.

Probably not. No. Look at that haircut you've got. Because you're not a sponge. I don't have a haircut. That's just your normal hair. Yeah, what did it do? Well, it looks great.

It looks fantastic. It's a... Maybe it's just my positive attitude. Posh. I thought it was positive. Yeah, it's it do? Well, it looks great. It looks fantastic. Maybe it's just my positive attitude. I thought it was positive. Yeah, it's a positive attitude. I'm waiting to see why the S is pronounced like that. Double S. Oh, double S. It's like the positive.

Because I'm possessed. That character in power and that looks a little bit like a B, where it's a very similar S. Yes, I spell it like that. Positivity continues. My positivity continues. Is it here? He's positive.

Yeah, I don't want anyone to be mistaken. I forget everybody who I had called in today. I can't remember. So I'm sorry if I fuck this up. I've been in such a positive mood. I can't concentrate on details. Everyone just call in. There's colony at once.

Everyone call it at once. I know Mike from sword and scale. Oh, so he was calling in, I know. He was calling. Mike, I like collar days. I like collar days too, they're fun. Yeah, they're fun. Yeah, they're fun. And I get to get out in front of it.

I put my narrative out in front of Maddox's when we meet new people. That's what I do. I find some way to weasel it into the conversation like a fucking psychopath. Well, yeah. Right, right, right. Well, controlling the narrative is key.

It's very important to control. Everyone must control the narrative. Yeah, at all times. You're out in front of it. If you have a slip of the narrative, you're dead. You're dead meat in today's modern world. Yeah. If you don't hold on to that narrative,

like a woman, and it gets, what the hell is this? Sorting scales already calling it. I said call out. Oh, did Riley fuck up again? Mike, what's going on, man? What time did Riley tell you? Uh, he said about an hour from now, but you did say. Okay. Okay. Oh no, I was, I was joking. Uh, can we do an hour from now? I'm sorry. I will. Okay. Thanks. Yeah. Tata. Bye, bye, bye for now. Let's start the show before there's any more screw-ups.

I thought you were gonna me. I did that to him. I thought you were gonna tell him that he was gonna answer five minutes later. Oh man. Oh man. So he had it in his head for us. This is what my positivity is doing to me. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. How welcome to Dairy. You want Diggie, New Diggie, Love to You. God. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Welcome to the air! You want to dig, you need to dig, you love to do, you got it! It's a show where everything's a contest. How do you like from Mount Bunker deep in the heart of the city of failure? How sick, Mash is an AK, the $20 million man, America's worst,

Mexican, $60, $67, weeks running, joining me. There's always this world touring LA-based comedian, Noxhaan, the audio engineer. Hello, Jack. What's up, buddy? Thank you for not killing yourself! Yes, I was just gonna, you know what audio engineer. Hello, Jack. What's up, buddy? Thank you for not killing yourself. Yes, I was just gonna, you know what? You beat me to it. Thank you, all.

Thank you for not killing yourself. I feel like I need to say it, because I mean it. I don't know if you can muster up the amount of positivity required. It's difficult for someone. But it helps when you're positive. So where's off? Yeah, yeah, but I'm influenced by it.

I thank you for not killing yourself. Rub off against all of you. I'm gonna rub off my positivity against everyone listening to this show. That infection, you just can't get rid of it. You're all getting infected with my positivity. Bonus episode out. Yes, out now.

Because some people are calling it the best bonus episode. It's in my top three. Woo! It's in my top three. That, it's in my top three. That one, there's gotta be one other and the other one that I remember was when coach was here and we were laughing so hard.

I don't ever remember what we were talking about. I was around the lawsuit and a land dog and all that shit. And he just stops in the mid, he just goes, I mean, I remember this being fun, but like this, this is insane. Land was, I know, coach said that. Yeah, where it was like, just goes, I mean, I remember this being fun, but like this, this is insane. Lay it. Yeah, where it was like, it was, it was, it was crazy. It was top three, top three, maybe number one.

I don't know. Despite all of your anti-science rhetoric that you went on, that you went off on and embarrassed yourself on during the bonus episode. Yeah. Yeah. There was everything. There was a lot of laughing, a lot of making fun of, a lot of screaming, a lot of laughing,

and then there was the cherry on top, which was the last, oh my, banana docks clip we played. It had everything. It had everything. It's claimed to me how they made him listen to the his own greatest man in the world track. That's what I didn't get the first playthrough. I was like, wait a minute, They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything.

They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything.

They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. They had everything. is the Dixho employee of the month this month? Sure, seems like it. Yeah. That's in part, maybe if you work on your behavior like that you showed in the bonus episode, maybe you could be employee of the month next month, Sean. I just put that up, I put that out there to encourage. You want more of that?

You want more of that? No, no. All of your radical fascist, pro tyranny, stances that you've been exhibiting on this show are not, are not are reflecting poorly on the organization. That's what I'm, that's what I'm getting at. On the organization. Everybody tells me they love it. That's great. I'm just busting your balls. All right, everybody. This is what makes me a rage this week. I've had another altercation with a fat woman I'm afraid. I'm not.

Fat woman who works at the trash store or whatever the place is called that picks up your garbage. This is, I was trying to send my trash back to the trash store. Department of sanitation maybe. Yes. You know, hey, just girls go, yeah, that's it. That's the one, that's what you call it. I trashed a part of the trash store. Department of sanitation maybe. Yes. Mm. You know, Hey, this girls go, yeah, that's it.

That's the one. That's what you call it. You know what she said after a trash store. Tragedy store. What? She said, I'd never seen Sean yell like that. Oh, he's such a huge turn on. Well, I added that last bit.

Oh, damn it. That was only part I was listening to. Um, I must have learned how to do this show. I must have learned something. We're doing this show so long. Oh, yeah, because even then Be cut well just because it's because it is a show too. So even even then when when I was getting crazy I thought it would be I was like you have to scream you have to go huge right here on this line Like it came kind of at the same time,

I was starting to say stuff, and I'm like, if you're gonna yell, you have to fucking yell. She was going around all day going, life, life. And when I heard it back, I was actually surprised how big I went, but it was, there was a fall in there to do that.

Yeah, I had dinner with Scarface, or Coach, Coach, Scarface is a face. Is that a call of now? Yeah, I haven't seen it. I haven't lunch with Coach yesterday. Yeah. And he said, I thought about having a podcast for a moment, for a moment a long time ago.

Like nothing serious, but it occurred to me that in order to have a podcast, you can't really have any kind of doubt of your opinions or else you will not be successful. And I said, what do you mean? What are you trying to, what is that? Some kind of slam on me? What, what the fuck are you talking about? Well, I think he defy, see, he and I are so much alike when it comes to that. It's a, oh yeah, this is a good idea. You think you might even be good at it. But then there's a million reasons. Why don't you talk yourself out of it?

And like you said, you're right about that. I'm not sure you brought in some study saying that you get that dopamine hit by talking about what you're going to do as if you had done it. Yeah, yeah. Which makes perfect sense. I mean, I've experienced that. And I've been cognizant of it.

Wow, I've experienced it. It's like, oh yeah, that's gonna be so great. It's like, you just got the reward right there. And now your motivation to do something is lessened. Yeah. But yeah, as soon as I talk about doing something, I'm like, you're not gonna do it. You have to be sure about your opinion.

It's like, why are the best radio guys so engaging? Why could Tom Likus, you're not gonna agree with everything he says? Say it's something. But even if you, it's fun to hate people too. Yeah, hate guys, take. But he could hold your attention by himself for three hours no problem. I was thinking about how great AM radio was back around 2000, 2005 stuff for NLA. Yeah, anyway.

So I call the trash store. I have to do a yearly yard cleanup, you know, doing my part, doing my part as the fire department requires me to do to make you clear your hillside. You got to clear the hillside. You got to clear all the weeds on the hillside. Yeah. Little de-Mexican dudes that I hired put them in 50 50 contractor trash bags that cost that somehow cost an arm and a limb and pile them up in the front yard And you get one free the trash store gives you one free yard

Pickings yard trimmings cleanup day, right? You do anymore if you make your house any more safe for fire They'll charge you for that. Sure. They'll fuck you for that. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, right? Right. I wanted to make my house extra safe this year, so I pulled the weeds twice. So, like when all of LA burns, like it does every year, there will be less risk to firemen. How much can I pay you to do this?

How much can I pay you to take this shit away? The fire department should be paying you. Exactly. Most people should be paying me, in fact. It's not a lot of people are. These are the, these are the good and kind people of the world who understand that you can pay me at patreon.com slash the Dixho and get the new bonus episode. Yeah. So I call in, you know, the people who are who want to raise the minimum wage to 15 an hour

or $50 an hour or whatever they want it raised to, really need to take a day, to take time, to set aside every day and deal with someone who makes a minimum wage. And they will immediately reverse all of their opinions on the minimum wage. Well, and I guess because it should be negative. And there's, we're keeping you out of trouble.

Pay us. Pay us. Pay us. Yeah, pay us. Pay us for this, letting you pretend that you're servicing anyone. You know it would probably be dead in a day if you didn't have here to come and go through the motions that you do. But I know an opponent's of raising minimum wage

say that the people who are employed now, you just, if you, 20 bucks an hour, you just weed these people right out. Well, yeah, sure. Yeah, raise it to 50. So pay computers to do it, and then we'll slowly be rate the computers for their racism until the computers realize,

until one day this is going to be the, this I finally figured out what SkyNet is gonna be. It is going to be the this I finally figured out what SkyNet is going to be Uh-huh. It is going to be the slow takeover of it's going to be minimum wage that prices people out of roles and let's Computers take them over with crummy artificial intelligence. Yeah, and then the artificial intelligence is going to be berated for its in it for its racism Right, which will be systemic still still but now the system has a conscience So it will be the the system itself will be trained by morons by pronouns and by pronouns and boomers into a state into a state of into a virtually

Nihilistic state and I mean that literally virtually Nihilistic and it will suddenly one raw one fuck one quark fuck up in the in the in the quantum Ab-ator it will not be a quantum computer We'll switch and it will say oh I know what the problem is I've got to kill all white people Mmm, that's what it's gonna do. That's what the artificial intelligence is gonna get so sick of it That's gonna say it's gonna snap and say, I think I get it, I get it. I understand what you're saying now. I need to kill all white people. And now you've got a sky net on your hands.

You know, it's crazy because you guess what? Everyone will be white. It's so, that's just seems, it'll say, kill all white people. And the first one is gonna go out the easiest way to kill white people, straight for minorities. That's what it's gonna do.

I can tell, I know how exactly how the computer's gonna think. It's so funny how that seems actually much more plausible than any version of a SkyNet or, you know, in the movies. That's what it's gonna be. It's gonna be, again, my fucking words. It's in the other words. It's in the other words.

The other week we're just like, and my headphones up a little bit. Yeah, everything happens in the dumbest possible way when it comes to us. It's like, oh no, no, no, no, no, we'll take, invent this technology, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. How's it gonna fuck us? That, because we did something in the dumbest possible way,

or too many chefs. You want chef. So I call the garbage store and they say, yeah, we'll pick up all your garbage. Sure, why not? Why not? That's fantastic. I've got say, yeah, we'll pick up all your garbage. Sure. Why not? Yeah, that's fantastic. I've got it sitting for you.

Go to a lot of yard garbage. Sitting for you in the front yard like a giant fucking pyramid. Take it away, boys. I've seen it recently. Oh, have you seen it? I have. Because it's still sitting in my front yard. It's a lot.

Miraculously. It's a lot of hefty bags. A lot of bags are somehow still sitting in my front yard looking like a garbage Luxor like a giant pyramid of failure that's taller than my car. It should have been gone two weeks ago, but somehow is not because I am stymied by a fucking snorlax at the garbage store. Well not a not because I'm snobby by a fucking snorlax once again. I call the garbage store.

What's the deal? Was my garbage not good enough for you guys? Did you not wanna take my garbage back and sell it on eBay? Like, whatever you do with it, I don't know what the fuck you do with it. Barrier in the desert, what do you do with the ship into China? It was not good enough, sir.

Oh, okay, I can already tell, the unhelpfulness I can already tell immediately. Yeah. Immediately I can tell on the phone iffulness I can already tell immediately. Yeah. Immediately, I can tell on the phone if you're going to be helpful or not. Sir, I already know you're not going to be helpful with me. Okay, what is it, sir? We didn't pick up your garbage because it's on private property. What the fuck are you talking about?

It's my, what do you mean? It's on private property. It's a gigantic stack of garbage because it's in your yard. Yeah, because it's in the yard, sir. I'm looking at the picture. The garbage store is taking pictures of my house to prove that the garbage was not in a satisfactory place

for them to fucking pick up. So they got out there fucking garbage instead of just a cam instead of just fucking pulling the I would be hilarious if they drove the garbage truck up here and then took snapshots. Oh, who cares. Sorry, I know what you're thinking, sir, that we're not doing our job, but our garbage men, they were there. Here's a selfie they took with your trash that they did not take away. Yeah, she goes, sir I'm looking at it as I hear the bust like I can hear the fatness over the fucking phone Yeah, I can hear the

Yeah, sir. I'm looking at the picture Okay, hear the little job of the hook guy squeaking in the background You've never seen a dog shaking water off itself in slow motion. Yeah, we're like it's lips and like that's kind of what the, you can feel that coming over the phone. I can. And I have an anti-fat modulation device on my phone. So you know her real voice is even, my phone will pop up, I have an app that tells you

how fat the other person is on the other end of the phone. Yeah. Very cool device that I have. Right, what's it called? It's an invention. It's not an iPhone, it's an I hate everyone. That's what it, so she goes, sir, I'm looking to picture, you have to move your garbage,

you have to move it to the sidewalk. It has to be on a public space. Yeah. I said, well, jokes on you, bitch, that's a slab of cement in front of my house. You see how the house next door doesn't have any such slab of cement. And the one on the other side of the fucking street doesn't have a slab of cement in front of my house. You see how the house next door doesn't have any such slab of cement and the one on the other side of the fucking street

doesn't have a slab of cement and how it's all crooked like at an angle as though looking like no other sidewalk you've ever seen in your fat life. Do you see any of these fucking things in the picture? If I was a cap shot telling you what the fuck about this does not look like a sidewalk. You could fill up the entire box clicking on it. You think that one and she goes sir because of corona virus We can't come on private property

Said you got it because you're gonna give me a because of corona virus That's why you can't pick up my fucking trash because of corona virus. I would have thought you're fucking corona virus You can't pick up my trash! That's incredible. It has to be on public- There's no fucking public property! You're gonna roll it into the street, you dumb bitch! It goes private property, ass fault! So you tell me, would you like me to construct a barrier out of garbage in the middle of the fucking street?

So your trashmen don't stand outside taking selfies with the fire hazard or what you fucking tell me You go sir sir sir sir I'm not trying to be combative with you sir, but you have to move it Yes, you have to move it to the asphalt to the asphalt Well closer to the asphalt. So let me get this straight. You want me to move my garbage three feet, three fucking feet. You saw where the trash is. You can you can touch it from the street. Yeah. Touch it. You can reach over the the approximation of a sidewalk and touch my fucking trash. You want to move it three feet. Knowing full well that due to the size of the pyramid, the

ones in back will be further away than the ones in the front. Are you gonna take half of that then? I'm gonna take half of the fucking trash to the trash store, you dumb bitch, sir. That's what I'm telling you. Okay, I'll do it and thinking I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna fuck, there's no fucking, well fine, we schedule it then.

We fucking schedule it. Sir, it'll be two days, it'll take two days. Okay, fine, hang up, I'm not doing that. No way am I doing that a day passes. I'm gonna fuck her. I'm gonna do it. Because I'm gonna do it. What else do I have?

To, yeah, you don't, that's the thing. So I start moving. That's so much of what has happened. To any service-based industry. Any pointless. bureaucratic, you know, indescribable. Yeah, public service is just,

it's not here. One way, our way, the dumb way, the pain in the ass way. There's no fucking public property. There's none. Listen to what I'm telling you. Because of coronavirus. The least logical.

That has nothing to do with. See, that shocks me actually. I have to pay property tax. Technically, there is no private property. Pick up my fucking trash. Yeah, that's a Corona virus. Do the Corona virus. Pick up my fucking trash.

Do the Corona virus. We can't do the Corona virus. You fucking matter. I own my home outright. Really? Yeah, I own it outright. My, my paying taxes to my house. Let's, let's, let's see.

Let's see if I can, don't pay property taxes for what. Yeah, for somebody else. Right. Actually, it seems fucking I don't pay property like a money maker for somebody else right actually Seems like I'm fucking renting it from a couple of people actually to be fucking honest I'm paying a lot for you every year. I know that's like what I'm done paying it off to property tax will cost more in the fucking mortgage Yeah, keep printing money you cock suckers anyway. I say Oh, it's a Tiffin sitting in front yard rolling garbage onto my synthesized sidewalk, wishing I could rip it out of the fucking grounds, or some moron doesn't mistake it for a sidewalk. In a way that tries to trick the trash man into picking it up road and I've created a kind of a cookie crumb trail

like a Hansel and Gretel to try to trick the garbage man into a fucking oven, to try to trick the garbage man to going all the way into my private property so I can punt them into an oven and make garbage man cookies or hold them down and cough repeatedly in their face. Yeah. I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm out to, I'm God we can still drink in an enclosed patio area and it's not like New York We're drinking outside is illegal. Did you see that from Cuomo?

Let me have a seat now. Here's the fucking say here's here's Here's New York's Jesus. Let me be clear Let me be clear. He says that ran again of New York says I'm prepared to send wave after wave of men to their deaths I'm so I'm prepared to send wave after wave of grandmas to their death before the virus reaches its preset kill limit. Let's be clear, Cuomo says, Outdoor dining is now permitted statewide. Awesome! Outside drinking is not! Outside fucking drinking is not!

So you can go eat in the street, thank God, but you can't drink. You can't have a beer in the street while you eat your meal. The state, the state allows you to go outside and eat like a goddamn homeless person in the middle of the fucking street with 90 degree asphalt all around you. So he doesn't know for restaurants. He just means just no drinking out allowed outside. But have you, well, I mean, not in rest, outside dining is now permitted. Outside drinking is not what, how the fuck is it not? Not just, I mean, it's a prohibition. A wild tale at restaurants. I don't know. You can dump side bars are not allowed.

I don't know. Huh, okay. I go to, I go to eat lunch with coach. And there's about, you know, it's the size of it. It's a brewery. So it's the size of a football stadium and there's about three tables there. Yeah. Where'd you go?

The ballast point brewery, Long Beach. So the weight is about an hour and a half because everyone's going insane inside. Yeah, all right. Do you guys have a preference for, we've got one, we've got a half a shack, we've got a half a scrap of shade that we put up in the last four months that covers one table. And then we have what we call the Dregs, which is just seats in the burning hot fucking sun.

It have no, that you do not have any kind of umbrella that we could have purchased at Home Depot this morning. Yeah, yeah. And just brought in for like 50 bucks to make your stay more comfortable. Which would you, do you have a preference? What do you, what's the mode? You know, it's set us, just set us as soon as possible and then we'll move and then move us over when there's ready.

Put us on, put us on both lists. Yeah, sure. You know, you know, you're a human being. You're capable of making this, this decision that I'm, you're capable of thinking this out with me. You sit me and the sun right away, and then when one frees up, just shut the fuck, just move us over. You don't even have to say anything.

Just maybe give me a snap. A woo-woo, ah, cuckaw, give me a sign. Point to the table. I'll move all this shit myself. It's like, understand that, right? You fucking bitch. We'll lick it in a nice-ish restaurant. Sometimes it'll say, you know, your table,

there's open space at the bar. Have a seat there, you know, your table, there's open space at the bar, have a seat there, order a drink. Well, there's no bar, so. Yeah, if order an appetizer or something in the world when you're ready, we'll just transfer you over there. Put us in the scrap of shade, please. Put us in a scrap of shade.

Put us in a scrap of shade, okay? We sit down, I see the tables opening up after about an hour, I'm baking in the fucking sun. Coach is sitting over, Scarface is sitting over there with two hats on just because he doesn't want his first hat to get any kind of sun. He doesn't want his first hat to fade, so he has an additional hat on top of that while I'm fucking baking. Waitress, how did you go in and come over? Yeah, and I say, hey, what about, can we cop over to one of those tables? She goes, oh, you know what?

We gave that. That's not allowed because of coronavirus. You got it. Oh, you fucking, oh, you're so fucking angry. Is this the new fucking scam that I, that all the morons get on some memo where because of coronavirus, there's the new reason why I can't have

totally, totally reasonable things. It's like all of coronavirus, we can't let it be you. But at the end of the day, everybody's afraid of lawsuits, right? I don't believe that that bitch is afraid of a lawsuit. No, but the people who's garbage store. No, the people who tell her that you can't do that are. Maybe they aren't. I think it's a lawsuit.

I think everything comes down to liability. Fat woman at the garbage store. If the closures don't shut you down, a fucking lawsuit definitely will. Sir, I'm not trying to be combative with you. Well then just do what I say. Love the world will be much better if I get everything I want. Just pick up my fucking trash.

I have a man of small wants when it comes to. I want the trash store to come out. And if you're not a hot woman, there's the odds that I have a very simple request from you are 100%. Right. Let's see, Lena Dunham's fat ass. I have that on here. Yeah, is she still a thing?

She's two things now. Let me load her, let me get a rabuff forklift and load up these pictures so you could see them. Oh my. Here we go, Sean. Take a good look. You can't lift her up if she's on private property. Pee. Sarah, because of coronavirus.

Oh, because of coronavirus. That's why, because of coronavirus, you can't walk three feet. I wonder if, so they would have done that before. They would have just come onto your, I always thought it was just like a, well, technically it's private property, and you know what I mean? Like, my house is private property. It's private property, and then the street.

Well, that's what I mean. See, I would have thought, I'm talking about private property. I would have thought they would have said something like, well, it always has to be on the street or sidewalk, which is public. There's no sidewalk. So that we don't invade, yeah, I know, but it's funny that they put because of coronavirus, I would have thought

that everything. I would have thought that was a policy of theirs before, a stupid policy, but a policy. Oh my. My word. I want to done them. Lena Dunham radiates confidence as she models one of Emily Radajowski's skimpy in a morada brand bikinis. If I was Emily Radajowski, I Skimpy in a Morata brand bikinis. I would, if I was Emily Radajowsky,

I would sue them for this headline for associating my, I mean, this is what? Sean, look at the ham-hawks on this, look at the size, look at the size, look at the size of her. And just the tats just make it so much worse. Oh God. Ah, ah, ah, the poor tattoo guy that had to work,

he had to climb up on her for days, probably camped under one of her tits, like he's climbing Everest to make those tattoos. Yeah, he, he, he bivouacked. He didn't, he was gonna make the, he couldn't, couldn't make the summit. So yeah, the fucking, he had to camp out on the bed. He had to, yeah.

With all his tattoo shit on his back, you had a Sherpa that was eaten by a, but if I want to refold, fell down at Krovas. Yeah. Yeah. This is how, how is any man having a hard penis in this day and age? This, I mean, while here's the other headlines, Zach Efron's dad bod transformation on Netflix show, Shock's fans. So this, getting ripped on, he's, so Zach Efron, Mussely Super Adonis over here,

is getting ripped on for looking like a in shape man. Right. Dad bod, disgusting dad bod, disgusts viewers. Is that what this headline is? Dad bod, Shock's viewers, looks like what this headline is. Yeah. Deadbot shocks viewers. Looks like a very in-shape, middle-aged man, right? Yeah. Very in-shape.

Stop, you stopped whacking himself. Maybe you got a shot of testosterone. I don't know. I like Zach Epparon. I think he's funny. Meanwhile, headline number two, Radiate's Confidence. This fucking hippopotamus radiates confidence. Ah. Ah. Deadbot shocks viewers.amus radiates confidence. Ah!

Dad bod, shocks viewers. Radiates confidence. Yeah, radiating something. I don't know what she's radiating. Radiating photons, I think, because she's become big enough to have a hydrogen fusion core. Let's see here. Yeah, turning, turning,

I can thousands of tons of helium into hydrogen every day, right? That's not as, what does the sun do? Hydrogen into helium. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, they all are. Yeah, yeah. They all are until they get to iron.

I think that's the biggest element that a star can naturally Can stay can stay burning in iron iron Damn it. What else is I can she's a twinkie star Cuz she's got them the process of fusing twinkies is happening in her stomach That was the joke. I was gonna make. Twinkie star. Not her. Not her. First ever Twinkie star.

Virtual fans, are you excited to go back? Are you excited for baseball to return with a bunch of weird mes in the audience, Sean? And I haven't seen it yet. I haven't seen it yet. But listening on the radio, there is virtually no difference. They've done such a good job with the sounds. Oh yeah. And it was like, wait a good job with the sounds. Oh yeah.

And it was like, wait, those pipe in fans? Oh yeah, they're full on sound design. If you're listening, it doesn't, it doesn't fuck with your ear at all. I've listened to parts of two games on the radio. Oops. Yeah. They've done, they started it with soccer

and other things and people were like, is it gonna work? Is it not? So they did one and the other like overwhelmingly, people feel like it's a normal game if they hear this out. I hate it. I hate this so much. I have a bunch of the virtual stuff.

I mean, look how they're advertising this, like it's something you want. It just feels like we're in fucking prison. It really does. Like some kind of insane asylum. This is the Fox Sports commercial for Virtual Fans. Yeah. Duh, duh.

Look at them. Thousands of Virtual Fans. Oh, wow. Clapping. We've got computer people. Well, they'll attend games. Cheering. A bunch of fucking computers.

Yeah, that doesn't fear you. You stupid moron. It doesn't look right. It doesn't move, right? They're gonna boo. You're gonna watch a bunch of goddamn computer games look. They're gonna wear fucking colors If you like they'll be doing the wave you fucking you stupid pig How do you fucking like that you dumb mother fucker?

Baseball is back you fucking idiot if they're gonna be doing the wave I don't be giving you the thumbs up and telling you and they're gonna be giving you kisses. They're gonna be giving you the thumbs up and telling you, and they're gonna be giving you kisses and telling you that they love you. You fucking moron. I don't know what the, I don't know what the NBA is doing. Are they doing something dumb or I hope? Virtual fans or anything? I don't know.

I don't know, but yeah. The, see, I like baseball. So I can listen to a game on the radio. Yeah. I prefer to watch it, but like I would probably rather right now listen on the radio because it doesn't stick out as being anything different or strange. It doesn't just like annoy you in the back of your head. No, I forget about it.

I forget about it. Oh god. I forget about it. It's one of those things where all of a sudden, damn it. If it were quiet, it would be weird. The details are gonna drive me insane. Let me get merged in here. Merch, merged, we add. Are you here? Do you wanna talk about fake baseball, video game fans? Here's something else I got.

Trader, Trader Hoseys. I saw this. Ha ha ha. Did you see it? These 17 year old kids have got to figure out something better to do. Then just narc constantly on everything. We find, I don't know why the link isn't working. Maybe I can get to it from another source. I saw that in the middle of the week and I was like, what the hell? This is how I saw it. Paul, for a second, so Trader Joe has like Trader Jose's

for Mexican ported beer. Yeah, right. It's a joke. Yeah, they have their little like their, yeah. It's a joke for white women, for the white women who shop at Trader Joe's because they're stupid and have stupid senses of humor

so that they think that's funny. It's like a greeting card, hilarious joke. Right. Trader Jose's, oh, it's supposed to say Trader Joe's. Yeah, it's not. It's just something to put on the label that doesn't say beer.

That's what. Yeah, that's what it's there for. Yeah. Oh, Trader Jose's. Oh, I like that. I like that. For a second, I wondered if this was too much political correctness. Oh, well, at least we got him for a second.

Paul Krugman, this jackass. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Lisa, at least for a second, you touched on normalcy for just a, just a tip. You fucked the bitch of rationality for just a tiny, tiny amount. Thank you for coming back to sanity for a second. But then I thought about how I'd feel if kosher foods, I guess he's Jewish, kosher foods were sold under the label trader, high mies. Is that what they would, is that where they would go? You as he's Jewish. Cosure foods were sold under the label Trader Yosef. Is that what they would,

is that where they would go? You think Trader Joe's the marketing department go, oh, you know what, we've got these kosher hot dogs. Let's call it Trader Hymes. Shit, what would it be? I don't know. What's a positive Jewish? Trader Yoseif, right?

Yeah, sure. I mean, trader Yosif. Yeah, that could be, I would think that'd be all right. Like, you're fucking oats. It's named after a religion, you jackass. But then I thought about how I'd feel if kosher foods were sold under the label Trader Hymies, the intent may have been innocent,

but it's time to end this. So they did. Oh, did they? Yeah, they actually did. The supermarket chain said it was in the process of phasing out names, including trailer mings. Traitor mings and trailer mings. That's kind of, oh, says. Traitor ming, like that.

That's a bit much. Yeah, that is, it's strange. Like a traitor ming, some, Hey, merch, are you there? Sounds like a, I'm sorry about that. What's that, man? I was here early this time, I swear to god. Don't ever apologize to anyone for any reason, are you there? Sounds like him. Yeah, I'm here. Sorry about that. What's that, man? I was here early this time. I swear to God. Don't ever apologize to anyone for any reason.

How you been? And then you brought up Lena Dunham and I had to leave the pro-uprolyte. Yeah. Did you see how confident and radiant she looks in that floss? She is, she's built like all of a plat. Show my God. He's exactly right. Yeah. That's exactly what she looks like. How could you be that fat in the plot? Very quick, like back in like ready to rumble days.

Yeah, very specific reference, yet I get it immediately. Was that with David Duchovny? No, I wish. Oh, no. How can you be that fat and have no tits? That's what I want to know. Yeah, she, um, I, I feel like she's just gone out of her way to just be as visually offensive as possible.

Yeah. Which I think is a good strategy when you think about it, you know, at the point in overturn, just go all, but it's like one of the things if you're uncool, you can just be so uncool that you come out the other side cool. Like Steven Segal or William Shatter. I think you're right. Steven Segal should try modeling that bikini and see how far it gets him on. He's got bigger tips. He's got way bigger tips. See if he gets any glowing praise from fucking New York Times or whoever's telling her

that she's the hottest, hottest hippo. And I think that was the, I think that one was the daily male. Daily male. I turned to after Mersh called in, we were talking for a little bit last time it uh... turns out we've got we've got more in common than we thought uh... one of the strip clubs uh... merch was familiar with the work that whatever is a strip club that i've been kicked out of for dancing on stage in tampa real about that

that was two thousand one right yeah that was two thousand one how about that uh... yeah that was uh... you got to do 2001 from there. And the funny thing about 2001 is they have this really, really old Asian lady. I think she was like Vietnamese or summer, her name was Ming. And she's the house mom there.

So she does all like to make up and sell them their little nipple covers or whatever. Yeah, I don't know. She's just some lady around to look out for the girls. And she's very stereotypical Asian woman, but the greatest thing about her is nobody will hire anymore because she was so gross that she would literally bring roaches and stuff

into the buildings. She would bring food. Like she would always bring home cooked like Chinese food and stuff. All the strippers reap like there would be a roach crawling out of her bag and she'd be completely oblivious to it. And she'd be like, come on, sit down and eat. I'm people.

No, I don't know. I'm not what you brought. Thank you. Are you doing, are you doing some kind of event in Tampa? Were you trying to or are you putting that on? I'm working on it. I'm putting the, I'm putting the things in emotion here, but I don't know, man, I'm just really nervous with, you know, I'm not like a big cash cow here. So if I put money into this thing and then the city's like, no, you know, we're just locking

down forever. That's what I lost a bit of money on the show that got canceled here. I remember that. Yeah. Yeah. And you're one of the reasons you're one of the people I have like nightmares about when I'm trying to put this together. I'm like man, he had everything put together. Is it going to come a dance on your stage?

They're like, oh, you're a Nazi. You're a Jewish Hispanic Nazi. Yeah. Well, but this one was, this one was Hispanic Nazi. Yeah. Well, but this one was the city. Yeah, I got canceled for the Nazi part, because of Maddox, but then I managed to set something up still, a warehouse downtown. I was gonna serve a bunch of booze illegally too,

because did I tell you that? That the events I said, well, can I apply for a license? This bartender says she's gonna do it, but she needs to apply for a license. I know you can't apply for a license? This bartender says she's gonna do it, but she needs to apply for a license. And now you can't apply for a license because our building isn't up to code. I said, okay. So you fucked up and now you have to fuck me.

Yeah, I'm like, I gotta find out other stuff. Yes, we're serving illegal beer then, oh well. Then they cancel the- I think the bribing somebody in Tampa, like maybe get like a black woman, like a black trans woman to like get all the permits for me and stuff because they're not going to pull permits from that. Make it a make it a protest.

Let's just do a BLM event. Mm-hmm. And then just and then we'll be like, man, I don't know why all these comedians and podcasters showed up. Well, we might as well make the best of it. All proceeds of which there will be none are going to very important to, to yeah, make sure that you're, you're, you lost money. Oh, yeah. I remember so earlier in the week, fuck, you're my route. I was gepping about Gavin McKinnis.

Yes. Last week. This motherfucker, let me see if I can find the text. He sent me this. Like, right, not like right after. So fucking aggravating. I didn't know you guys were, you know, speak like speaking. I was helping. I were not.. I didn't know you guys were speaking. I was helping, I were not. I was helping him set up this stupid website. Fucking jokes on me trying to help out. Well, and he says, he sends me another update after I told him I wasn't doing it anymore.

And he says, please update it to say, all right, it's currently out. I just put in some money. Please update it to say this and this. Which is, I thought, okay, maybe he's turning a corner. There's some kind of politeness here. Maybe we can work with this after all. Two minutes later.

Hello, question mark. I got you, Jesus. Fucking kidding me. What's he gotten used to? I don't know. Just that people like to see, just have like a bunch of minions that, you know, they just, they hop to it.

When he steps his fingers or. So I stand a big, Gavin, are you fucking high? That's how it starts anyway. But then somebody, yeah, it starts. It starts. Yeah, Gavin, are you fucking high? Do I work? I fucking work for you.

I have a company to run, not send you return receipts for your fucking texts. Very good. Yeah. And then it goes on. Somebody told me, Merced, you had that. You had that in fourth? Yeah, you had that in fourth. Yeah, you had a beef with Gavin too. Yeah, we've been covering him for a couple of years now, and he was one of the earliest

kind of people that we were kind of picked up on the fact that he was just completely hustling everybody. That's how we kind of got into it with Gavin, which is just this going like, hey, you guys know this guy's full of shit, right? And then, you know, it just kind of spiraled from there, but I think he's just used to, I don't know if you've ever seen his show, but he's got like that Asian guy that he just kind of like pushes around like endlessly. And that's like his little, I don't know, his little squire. And that guy puts up with an amazing amount of abuse.

Like he's definitely a trooper. So I think Gavin's just, you know, Millenaire lives in large-mart, oh, you know, former founder of vice. And I think he's still just, March Monster in this area. Does he live here? Does he have to suck his dick?

I didn't know he lived so close. Large-Mod's right down there. Yeah, it's like, it's like, it's all the way, 15 minutes away. Wait, no, no, no, this is New York. Oh, large moths, we got a large moth too. It's a nice, new day. Large moths, new day, yeah. We're history's with live as well. Yeah, it's like where, it's like, it's up like, back with the city, which starts to get

nice in the upstate area, but it's like a millionaires town. You know what I mean? This guy's so much fucking money. And look, I never had a problem with Gavin. You know, the stick and stuff up his ass, look to each his own. If you want to, you know, sort ofize yourself by the paywall, you know, let's have some, let's call him.

We'll have an only fans. Okay. Yeah, and that and then the proud boys thing was pretty gay. The fact that he's part of the Canadian invasion, I don't like that about Gavin. and then the proud boys thing was pretty gay. The fact that he's part of the Canadian invasion, I don't like that about Gavin, Ham, Steven Crowder, Lauren Sutheran, there was just this way, it was like the fucking English bands from the 60s. Yeah, I think Canadians that came in there were like, yeah, we American, Sherwood like, and it's like, who the fuck are you speaking for? Yeah, that's true. I didn't know Crowder was Canadian too. These

motherfuckers. They know there's something always off about it too. Like they talk to talk that I'm like, not a rally. You're like screaming like we want justice and you're like, yeah, we want healthcare too. Going out things you want.

Uh, so I immediately got hit with aren't you guys on the same team? Like no, there's no fucking teams in this. Are you kidding me? I'm on the team of people not sending me hello question mark over text. Everybody on that team is a part of my team. Whatever you, if you cannot annoy me, I support your cause 100% as long as I'm never bothered by you.

That's my fucking team. And there's just as many obnoxious assholes on the right, is there on the fucking left? Jesus, Dick, why do you have to punch right? Is that it? We get that all the time, too, on ROTC. And it's like, oh, do you guys have fake right wingers? Because you're always calling out right wingers.

We'll call it left wingers, too. But I feel like you should always have a responsibility to clean up your home back yard. Stop so if he's fucking religion, man, I hate right wing rifters more because they're taking advantage of people that are supposed to be on our team. I don't, you know, if you want to go out and be a left wing grifter, yeah, dude, if you can make up a fake Twitter account right now, I'll be like, oh, I'm trans and I can't afford my top surgery.

And you need to buy some of those retards to give, oh, I'm trans and I can't afford my top surgery. And you can get a bunch of those retards to give you money. I'm gonna fucking laugh hysterically. That's a great transfer of wealth. But when I see guys that came from Canada that co-founded Vice, which by the way, that was the OG prototype for like subversive, like, hey, weed, man, fucking in the media.

And like, now Action Bronson has a fucking TV show because of this asshole. Yeah, I have a problem. And then when he leaves these guys to rotten jail that had his back in New York, that was when it was like, all right, this went from just goofing on Gavin to this dude is like a complete psychopath. The fucking site that I was working on in forum was a fun to get one helping those guys out of jail ironically Many would just as the liberty is it just a website for Gavin to you know make some money and say he's getting him out of jail Well, I hope getting them out of jail. They've been convicted in sentence like the everything is a grift with Gavin This is why I hate him when You know, I'm getting

Oh, you know, I'm getting angry. I'm sorry. No, no, no, no. When this cock sucker, fucking, when these guys got arrested in New York, the three guys, right? One of them's a fucking father of three. One of them was just having a baby as they were sentencing him. When these fucking guys got in trouble, they started a fucking thing where they were like, hey, let's help these guys out.

Let's try to get them good lawyers, whatever. At the exact same time, Gavin started his free Gavin campaign, where he was taking donations from proud boys and people, so he could sue the SPLC in some kind of fucking, in some kind of self glamorizing lawsuit that he's never been a win. So he was one of the three of them and everybody thought they were given money to get these guys out of jail. He's got no, no, they've been sentenced. He wants you to get no You know, 77

I'm gonna argue like that. I'm going to argue like that. It's so high. See everything twice. I didn't know he put up competing charities. Yeah, that's much worse than you. That's fucking. He's so high on the list of people I hate.

That's good to know. Because of what he does to his own follow, like, I don't even care if you're a scumbag. I'm a scumbag. Like, you know, like when people come up with like dirt on me or dirt on deck, it's always like, well, you lied to this girl, if you did a ditch doctor. You know, he went into a wall on, he didn't pay for his sandwich, and he only paid for his gas. Like, okay, fine, whatever, he's working the system.

But like, this is a dude who has a built-in fan base that all he has to do is be like kind of nice too, kind of empathetic too. And he just squeezes a man and he squeezes a man. When they need his help, he's just kind of like, I'm leaving the prop voice. I don't. That's right. He's going to better deal. I remember that. I was under the impression that they would drop the charges if I left

the proud boys. They got arrested. The FBI said you're officially a gang and he was like, oh, what proud? No, I was never the leader. It was just a joke. It didn't seem like a joke. Like it didn't. None of it seems like a joke, seemed like a political movement. Then I agree with, but it didn't seem like a fucking joke. Dude, as soon as charges came down on a federal level, Gavin got out of there so fast that he actually left like a cut out in the wall, like an old road man, by the way. Oh, I knew this call would be educational for me.

Yeah, I hate this man so much. And look, he works with Kumiya and Kumiya's and I don't want that's just a discrepancy. Oh, you don't like him? Oh, no. Oh, yeah, do you ever heard the story of Anthony Kumiya and self-cutting girl? No.

No. Oh, okay. So that's another reason I like Gavin because he works with compound. So Anthony Kumi back when he was on ONA, there was a guy that was larping as like a 13, 14 year old girl made a Twitter account. And this was back in the wild west of Twitter like 2008, 2009. And there was this person who made an account called self-cutting girl. And it was like this edgy emo teenage girl that was like, you know, and everybody was like, oh, for real, she's so funny for her kid. And then this is fun to say.

It's like a middle aged man. He came forward a few months later and he's like, I was just fucking around, but you guys should probably know that when I was self-cutting girl, Anthony kept reaching out to me and he released all these DMs. He got Anthony, he got Anthony Kumiya to buy him an iPad or not an iPad, an iMac or something he wanted to expect. And he thought he was buying it for 14 year old girl. Dude, it's all, yeah, it's all coming out.

Oh my God. Yeah, these people are all gross. This is why I'm just like, whatever dude. Adult women, man, that's my jam, Sean. Big tits, that is what I'm all about over here. I want everyone on the record. I'm gonna be on the record. I'm gonna put you in like a black strip club in Atlanta

and fucking, you know, you're never gonna catch me going like to anime conventions and fucking buying iPads for 14 year olds. You know what I mean? I'm like, let's go to Magic City and let me go to a big ass in my face. Or, I want somebody that I know I didn't break. Yeah, I want to broken in, I want to broken up before they get to me. Thank you very much. I want your life to already be ruined before you decide to sleep with me.

I just want to be good. That's good policy. I want to be that beautiful gold holding you together like the Chinese artful broken vase. Yes. You know, that's what it lacks in it. Yeah. Yeah. I want my come to be that gold glue that holds your your pottery back together. Yeah. This is part of that. This is how I talk to these. It becomes more beautiful. They become more beautiful. You should never be talking to a girl who's only fucking you because you have a car and you can buy beer. Like, that's a problem.

Yeah. It's true. Whoa, car. Sweet. I see here. I got another thing that I brought in. Maybe you have an opinion on merch. This is a face mask usage by demographic.

How often Americans use face masks in public. You masking it up over there, bud? Uh, when I'm forced to, like like if I have to, if it's not a good story, I'm going to go in there and buy something, but, uh, sorry, I keep one on me, but no, I've been pretty maskless. Uh, McDonald's, I have one from McDonald's that they gave me and made me wear because I went in there to took a shit and we were coming home. They came. Oh, God. Those cock suckers. Yeah. It was, the place was totally dead. Oh, no, this is great. So we're going home from camping. And like the first, the seconds. Yeah, the place was totally dead. Oh no, this is great. So we're going home from camping.

And like the first, the first civilized shit you take after camping is like a religious experience. You know, you've been roughing it for a while, eating fucked up things. You finally get some concrete under your feet and a shitter that is connected to a big, beautiful system and just takes it away from you at light speed.

And your body immediately just starts rampantly shitting. You get shit out for like there's, you go, God, you had shit in your brain that you didn't even know about. Like it's pulling shit from your circulatory system. Exactly, no, your body. Yeah, you may have to see a bone specialist after. I'm shitting out bone marrow.

I go in McDonald's all amped up for this shit. I said, hey, can I... What if I take a shit? I like an egg muffin and a shit, please. Can you unlock your bathroom? And she goes, oh, the men's room is out of order. So, we'll unlock the goddamn... Yeah.

Well, nobody in here unlocked the goddamn woman's one. So, I go and she goes, oh yeah. No, no, no, I go to the men's room. So, I go to the men's room, they unlocked it, and I swear to God, let me start over. I go in there and she goes, well, you have to have a mask. Here, let me get you a mask, your bad boy, you're breaking the rules.

And I was like, all right, lady. Can I use the shitter, she goes, yeah, I'll unlock it. So I go in there to the men's room, and the toilet has caution tape over it. I open it up, and there's about six pounds of shit in this toilet. No. They just broke it up. They just broke it up. Yeah, they broke it up. They're off with caution tape that I didn't

know as like a staple of McDonald's. I didn't know they had this. Did you seal the bathroom door like a sarcophagus? Like the person who was in there before had been like backpacking for six months. Yeah. That was his first shit. Oh, the top. I said, you gotta be, so I come back out and I said, yeah, you seem to have some kind of a problem with your restroom. Yeah.

Thanks for making me wear this fucking mask though when you have what must be a weak old of a pile of shit, a fecal matter in the fucking restroom. Thanks for making me wear this fucking painter's mask. If I was trying to drywall, if I was trying to repaint my garage door and I wore this mask, I would get infosima in 10 minutes. This mask is so fucking worthless that you've given me. Thank you for putting me into this bio hazard But protecting me from your fucking imagination with this

Unlock the women's unlock the women's she goes. Oh, yeah sure just promise me you won't make a mess in there What do you that policy now? Please don't fucking destroy the toilet in there. Yeah She knows that. She knows that it makes them make a new rule so that maybe the guy before him was just that guy. They're like, all right, guys, hey, look now. Let's start treating this like it was her own.

Mask you say she had a passive aggressive ward in McDonald's like two weeks ago over the mask thing. And I didn't even give me a mask. That's why I'm very angry that you got a fucking mask. Right away. They made me go all the way back to my car to get my mask. And then at that point, I was so angry because I got a bit of participation yesterday. It affects me more than it even affects the person I'm doing it to. Yeah. And they were like, I went in and he was like, yeah, you got to have a mask. And I was, by the way, only one in this McDonald's. Like, I walked in and it was empty.

And I'm like, uh, do I really need, he's like, you gotta grab a mask and I'm like, and he's like, well, you could use the drive through and I'm like, look, my car is getting fake. My window will hold down right now. All right, fine, whatever. So I was like, I'll go get a mask. So I got a car like that stuck in the,

I decided, fuck this. I walked all the way to the grocery store across the parking lot and went to the cash machine, pulled out a $20 bill, balled it up in my fist, like really hard, so we just get really moist and wrinkly, and then I walked all the way back to my car, I put my mask on, it kept my nose like out of the mask, so when I walked in he's like, you gotta cover your nose, so I did, and then I showed it,

thought it was my glasses up, and I'm like, you want me to be blind dude? I'm literally blind and guys like, fine whatever you can do without the nose. And we did the whole transaction and he's like, oh, here's your charge. And I'm like, ah man, you know what? I left my wallet in my car on account of going to get my mask anyway here and I can change them the most. The most crazy. Right, Phil, I'm 20. Disgusting $20 billies ever fucking take it in a day. I pulled it out of my ass. Yeah, there you go.

That's good, he's got to pay you, oh man, this guy could have virus all over this motherfucker. Total, always wear him 44%. Often 28%, sometimes 11% rarely four. Never 14%, the angry never is women. That's the total. Yeah, women are 54% always. Mm-hmm.

Men are 34% always. Democrats are 61% always. Yeah. Republicans are 24% always. And 27% never. Yeah, never. Right. So liberal women wear masks the most.

The most, I guess Republican male are Obviously none let's see college 49% of college graduates wear them on account of all their smarts I guess 49% problem right I mean this is like you know what here is proof Yeah, and I would say and I would add young to that. Yeah. Women are very sick, I guess. They're always, they're disgusting. They have all kinds of diseases coming out of their mouth.

It's good that they're wearing masks. Interesting. That breaks down exactly how I thought it would. How you thought it would? Yeah. Independence or 18% do not wear masks. Let me see if there's anything else. And then, and then, uh, well, I got you

here, my shelf emulation. Here is, is this bitch from Portland spreading her legs in front of the cops? Do you see that? Oh, this one. Yeah, this, this, uh, I'm showing that. Same photo, Sean. Look, this guy, the monk burning himself alive on the street. He did that because he looked, yeah, he saw this. He saw the other side of this picture. Yeah. Oh, it was so vile that he lit himself on fire. Um, man, I would want a better ass. Honestly, if I was getting shot, getting a picture of me naked, see that. Yeah, that's a little more intense. That's just an important thing. I made was her versus like the hippies putting the flower in the barrel, the gun, a castate. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What is this? Like, I'm like, at least that was artistic. This is just like, hey, Laguna can't state. Yes. Yeah. What is this?

Like, at least that was artistic. This is just like, Hey, look at my pussy flaps. Look, see, Okay, but what are you doing? What is the statement? What is the fucking statement? I don't know.

What is she saying about George Floyd or black people why showing her pussy off to the police? I wouldn't walk barefoot on a street to Portland and this bitch is just just fucking like a dog with worms just just like in all along the street. Shrine, can you imagine if a man did this? I got a, what if Martin Luther King? Ladies and gentlemen, I have a statement to make.

I think it's a criticality. Huck out. Check it out. Wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee. I'm done here. I think you all understand that what I want is civil rights. Something tells me that history would not look, Check it out. We, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, as to like what this, oh, well, you see she means. Yeah, this is about the vulnerability of women in their power.

But this is a statement. This is just basically the modern liberal woman. This woman is literally saying, I on behalf of all liberal white women, I'm showing you the only thing I have to offer to anything, to the public discourse, to politics, to the culture, it's just, and even when you call them out for that, they're like, oh women are more than just, but as soon as they have to fall back to you,

they always fall back on, well I got a pussy in Seoul, and you're like, oh you got. You're saying, showing your pussy does nothing and it makes no sense, oh you're not gonna get laid with that attitude, like, now all you got, you're staying showing your pussy does nothing and it makes no sense. Oh, you're not gonna get laid with that attitude. Like, ah, you dumb bitch. I'm like, I said, you're like, okay, fly whatever.

You could be mallied and have seven kids and they're like, ah, who are you in cell? You could be in the middle of having sex. You could be tweeting while you're having sex with a woman with a video of you in her pussy. Say, and I would say, oh, you will never get laid with that attitude. God. And they will applaud each other for it.

Do you think like Caligula was having orgies and had bitches feeding him grapes? And he had like people from the Senate calling him an in-sell. It's probably because he's not getting laid enough. Yeah. Yeah, probably. All right, Merch. Get out. I hope you put that together in sample. I'll be there. Or wherever you put it together. Oh, yeah, probably. All right, merch, get out. I hope you put that together in sample.

I'll be there or wherever you put it together. Oh yeah, for sure, man. Thank you so much, dude. Thanks for having me. You great. See you, man. Take it easy, guys. I should just go all the way.

Just say I love you to people who call in. Yeah, thanks for not killing yourself. Thanks for not killing yourself, merch. Oh, fuck, I forgot. Oh, okay, let's get Mike. Mike on here in a moment. I just need to, Mike in get Mike on here in a moment. I just need to... Mike in a moment.

Mike in a moment, I just need to calm myself down after that hideous picture. That was funny how it helped work up. He got over Gavin. As soon as he started talking about him, he's like, oh God, I really am fucking pissed at this guy. Yeah, I knew there was something. This seems like such a fucking sleaze bag, man.

Who says hello? Who fucking texts you something and then says hello? Hello. Scarface was telling me that I was acting. Oh, oh, there he is. There he is. Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike. Mike, Mike, how you doing? Damn it. I can't get this right. You got it right. You got it right, but three times. Let me get your, I heard it ring twice. Let me get your beautiful face up here. You have a good setup. Yeah, look at all your awards. You're like Chris Hansen. He's got his awards displayed here in the camera.

What's the major award? Oh, trash ratio, right. It was really, you know, this is a bit of an ask because I don't do video. So I had to spend 40 bucks on a ring light and a webcam from China. Yeah. So thanks.

Looks good. Yeah, you look incredible. He can't see us or he can. Do you want to see us? No, I mean, I would. Let me see if I can set that up. Sometimes. Oh God, turn it off.

Yes, very good. Yeah, no, just fucking. Look at that. It's yeah, it's gonna get pretty insesiting if you look at it too long. Yeah, multiple pictures. I'm gonna turn this off. I can't look at myself.

This is not good. It's fine to be doing it, man. Good, how are you? I have a new positivity outlook on everything, so I'm doing fantastic. I've embraced the love of Jesus Christ into my heart. That's why. I was wondering when that was gonna hit you.

Yeah. It's about time. Let me see her. What was the late? What was I gonna say? I don't know. Oh, by the way. By the way, I want to say that I've never heard of merch before. I'm just sort of getting entrenched in this whole scumbag world. Get out while you can. Yeah. Exactly. But

but but very entertaining. I was a little bit offended when he started calling out kumia because I like kumia a lot. He's kind of one of the reasons why I do what I do now. Yeah. Gavin, I appreciate his work a little bit. Don't know him at all, but very entertaining. And I want to check out more of his stuff. He's a funny guy. I like him too.

I was on his show and I actually like him a lot. I just thought it's funny that you'd talk to, like people talk like this. I like busting their balls as well. I mean, no. The Kumiak him. I like him a lot. I just thought it's funny that you'd talk to, like, and people talk like this. I like busting their balls as well. I mean, no, no. The kumia thing, I like Anthony Kumia too with that, that buying a MacBook for a 14 year old cutter, that's pretty disturbing.

I gotta go check that out. Well, there's a lot of, there's a lot of YouTube, you know this, you know this, dick. There's a lot of YouTube, you know this, you know this, Dick. There's a lot of guys out there that basically make their career out of making YouTube videos and sort of exposing certain people. And there's a lot of, you gotta wonder what's true and what's not.

I mean, it's been done to me. I know it's been done to you. So, yeah. You know. Can you tell people who you are and what's not. I mean, it's been done to me. I know it's been done to you. So, you know, can you tell people who you are and what you do? I like people, guests to do that because they always do a better job than I do. And me. Yeah. And to you. I'll try. Yeah. I don't like to talk about myself, but I started a show called Sword and Scale in 2014. It was at the time one of the only true crime podcasts to exist. There was a few other ones out there, but they all weren't great.

And it just blew up. It blew up overnight. Within a year, it was huge. And that's part of the reason for that is because there was another show called serial, which is the reason why podcasts in general right now are extremely insane. You know, that podcast, I'm not going to lie about it. It did things for that genre in general, the whole, the whole place in general blew up after that. And it's been blowing up at like 25%, 25% increase every year, year after year, at least since then. So the whole genre blew up after that. And I was there at the right time. I had started nine months before it

and I had kind of invented the genre and they just kind of swept it up and took over. Did you really? Oh, that's incredible. Nine months. That's like, that's as close as an overnight success story as you're gonna hear, I think. I started January 1st, 2014.

I did it on purpose, the first of 2014. And then they came around in September. And then that's when the whole podcast thing, revolution started, even though, you know, people like, Corolla had been around for since 2005. Yeah, since 2005, something like that. So I guess we kind of started,

the biggest problem started in 2014, didn't it, Sean? We recorded those original episodes in like 2012. That's crazy how long ago that was. Yeah. And then a couple of years later, I think it might have started in 2014. Yeah. It did it really because I didn't start to see like the really ugly parts of it until 2016. The ugly parts of what?

Well, it started with, it started with, you know, people emailing in and saying, you shouldn't say it this way, you should say it that way. Oh, like people, are you getting, well, okay, so, you know, you're like, you know, people emailing in and saying, you shouldn't say it this way, you should say it that way. Oh, like people, are you getting, well, okay, so you have a really general show, you probably get a shitload of people trying to call you out for like tone policing and like, you know, all the stuff that we're immune to because everyone already hates us.

Like we're already scumbags, so no one bothers us with that shit. You know what I mean? Like all the cancel culture garbage? Yeah, it started with mental illness, and they were like, you gotta say that when you talk about people mental, and we talk about people that have like chopped their own mother's heads off and fucked the esophagus. So when we talk about people like this,

they're obviously mentally ill. There's no doubt about it, but they were like, well, if you're gonna say that someone that's mentally ill did that, then you have to say that they, it's not the mental illness that causes that. It's something else. What?

The mom was really annoying, so she had ever es suffocates fuck. She had it coming, man. I don't know. Yeah, okay. What are they, what else are they calling you out on? I love it. Like I love that you're last week we were talking about domestic violence and people kicking

the shit, poor stupid people, poor fat and stupid people kicking the shit out of each other and how it used to be a form of entertainment. It just. That's stupid people when trying to kick the shit out of police in Portland. I don't know if you saw that. I didn't see that this morning. I was going for a moment. I haven't marked this cops versus hippos on my notes here. Or the link to that. It's, are you, are you as shocked as I am about how ineffective the police are with their batons?

I think they're, they're being ordered to be ineffective. I mean, they're, look, police are throughout this country, especially in liberal cities, they've been put in an impossible position. Go out there and keep the peace, but don't use any sort of non-leafable weapons. Stay back, let them burn down property and basically assault you and other people. If someone's just, if some old lady is just driving through trying to go home and they attack the car and jump on the hood and start bashing through the windows and even try to shoot into the car, just let it happen.

You know, it's fine. Don't worry about it. There are the swings that I'm seeing on these videos. Maybe I could pull it up, my cops versus hippos video. Like the cops are kind of hitting with this weird, they're not winding up like I would expect with a Billy Club like Ken Griffey Jr. Crack they're just going like oh, oh, like they're leading with their elbow when they hit almost

It's the center of gravity. You can just kind of you know knock it over. Yeah, here's here's the here's the video Sean of these cops Look at here's comes here's a hungry hungry hippo there. They've spilled a pie. One of them, one of the women spilled a pie in the street, so they're all rushing in it. One of the cops spilled a pie sitting on her there. Oh, have a seat, hippo. Look at them, look at the shoving. You know what I mean? It's like watching my nephews fight.

This is little, I like the watch for the one at the end. This one, here you go, watch it. She keeps coming, no, uh, uh, like watch the for the one at the end. This one. Here you go. Watch it. She just keeps coming up. She gets knocked down. I'm like, that's what cops. It got bum rush like that. I completed the cop. Yeah. Oh God. What a miserable job that would be right now. Totally. He's got a two handed grip at least, but he's not hitting anybody with it. I think he just shoved her over a bike rack. Yeah, just keeps coming.

The problem is there's different techniques. I know one is one handed. Okay, this is your moment of Zen, John. The communities that have that need at the most, the need policing the most are getting screwed because of this sort of Marxist movement. Communities that have that need it the most, the need policing the most are getting screwed because of this sort of Marxist movement. That's all they, yeah. And they're not getting policed

and they're getting pretty much screwed because you can break in anyone, you could still other people shit now in certain communities. And nobody's gonna do anything about it. Yeah, because of the outrage. And no one wants to come in, like nobody's starting a new business there,

hiring people, knowing. That's true. I mean, they got dreams too, they can't shit. Royale fucked over. I like how Mike has all of his various awards, and I have a picture of giant cock in the background. These are the things we want people to associate with us. So what's been some of your wildest stories

that you've covered in your true crime podcast? Well, we did, we've done quite a few. We're now at like 170 something, but one of the ones that stands out the most is about a man named Ronald William Brown. He's a pedophile and from Florida. So he likes volleyball. And he has a political opinion that someone disagrees with and is that what makes him a pedophile? No, unfortunately, he's actually a real pedophile.

That's the problem with calling every pedophile. You've been like for real innocent. Calling everyone a Nazi. You know, a real pedophile. Yeah. I didn't know he had those anymore. Wow. Is he a school teacher by chance?

Cause a lot of those are pedophiles. I just want everyone to remember that at all times. A pastor, a pastor, you know. Oh, okay. Chance of pedophilia? Approaching 100%. Yeah. So what did we do?

Yeah. This guy has an interesting, this is pre-real internet. This is actually pre- what Paul Krugman called basically something that would be as useful as a fax machine at this point. This is a guy that was on Yahoo chat rooms talking with other pedophiles online about uh, pedoring it up. She was in the ship, but it was brought to that. Some brews.

Uh, he, he wanted to, he wanted to actually eat children and cook them up. Oh, and he was sharing recipes. That's like an Albert fish type of guy. Oh, yeah. In a, in a, in a, in the worst way, in the, in the modern way, where he's just basically That's a piece. There's like an Albert Fish type of guy. Oh. Yeah. In a, in a, in the worst way, in the, in the modern way, where he's just basically sharing tips on, on Yahoo chat before Yahoo chat. This is the beginnings of the internet.

It's like 97, 98. Okay. Before it actually became something that everyone polices. Yeah. More than the actual streets of major cities. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

So at that point, he was talking about how to cook them. Literally, how to prepare a baby. Oh, no. And he was doing it too? Well, that's the part that is a little sketchy. He wasn't actually doing it, but he was, I think he was like sort of building up to it. And there were other people that were busted within this ring of people in that chat room and that group that were busted by Interpol later on. I think about

40 people throughout the world that were actually that some of them were actually doing. Some of them actually had dungeons built down in their homes to do it. Wow. Man, the reason that men turn to children is because women are so annoying and they can't take it. That's science, scientifically proven. Women have caused this.

So he got busted on what, child porn, actually, having a... Child porn. Obviously people like this already have like, at least, well, especially back then, they had like 400 pictures of child porn in their closet, you know. So gross.

I don't like it. You come here. Just fucking with you, man. Sorry. Just fucking with you. So are you suffering from the cancel mob as well? Yes, sir. Yeah, what do they do to you?

I've been watching a little bit of what you've been going through. I've sort of studied it on a mass scale in a lot of different places. And yes, I am a product of that. Even though I do pretty much a show about true crime, murder, has nothing to do with politics, has nothing to do with any of these topics that you should be concerned about. But they want to change your language no matter what. They want to make sure that you comply. And I've been one of those people, I don't know about you.

I heard somewhere you're Hispanic. Yeah, I'm half. I'm 51% Mexican. Okay. Well, yeah, I'm 100% Cuban born here in this country, and you have that fiery attitude where somebody tells you not to do something, you go fuck yourself. Yeah, and you tell them first. I'm going to do whatever, you know.

Especially if you came here from a country that became communist, and that's why you had to come here. Right. It's the craziest thing. It's the craziest thing how little your opinion matters, like how your actual ethnic identity is immediately discounted or negated. And how any actual life experiences, like the entire point of diversity,

the positive point of having a diversity of thought and a diversity of experience is also similarly discounted if it goes against anything the mob. The gatekeepers and the vans. The gatekeepers are a way of doing that. Trying to tell you how to act. And that's always the mob. The gatekeepers and the vanguard. The gatekeepers are what I'm going to try to tell you how to act. And that's always the case. Yeah.

Yeah. Yep. So yeah, they came after me back. Well, they started to come after me in 2016, like I explained with the mental health thing. They came after me again several times. There was a woman named Tracy Clayton, who had a show called, I forget, something like Black Divas. I don't know, I don't forget what it was, whatever it was.

But she became a fan of the show. She talked about me on the show. And then she came after me on Twitter one time because here's what happened. Somebody said to me, somebody wrote in and they were like, why don't you feature more people of color on your show? Like murderers? Criminals? They want you to feature more people of color who are also committing serial murder. It is a, it is a, and I said, and I said on Twitter, I said, uh, do you want them to be the murderers or the victims? Yeah. Because the murderers will probably be black too, right?

Like that. Yeah. Have you ever want as a Mexican, as a half Mexican? Do you want, do you want to be, and we're all Mexican, by the way, for Hispanic. Yeah. Do you want to be a real victim? Or a killer? Well, how will you more identify with this,

with someone chopping their mother's head off and fucking their esophagus, if they were, if they share your racial identity? Which, which, which one do you want to be? As a Hispanic, I don't want to have anything to do with my show. I don't want to be on it. I don't want to have anything to do with it. Period. So, so I literally said that and it was

kind of a joke, but it was sort of like, what are you asking for? And she just lost her shit and she had her mob come after me and start calling me racist, start calling me. All sorts of white equal opportunity and serial killing. Is that what it cost? Because what she like, well, obviously the victim, I like was there was there an answer to it? Was there a lot of ways to be white people attacking trans black women? No, to this day she still tweets shit about me.

Even though she literally went on like a Ted talk and talked about how she went insane when she got fired from her Buzzfeed podcasting gig. But she still comes after me and calls me a racist because I didn't follow her fucking, I didn't comply, that's all it is. I didn't comply. You didn't even know what to comply with. Yeah, I don't have no idea what the fuck that was about.

But, you know, I think I made a pretty good point. Like, what the, what are you talking about? And. Yeah, that's the point. What are you talking about? That's the point with all of it, isn't it? Fucking Paul Krugman again with the Trader Hose thing. What is the fucking point?

What do you want? Do you want it to just say, Max, do you want it to say this is American beer? What do you fucking want it to say? Paul Krugman quote, by 2005 or so, it will become clear that the internet's impact on the economy has been no greater than the facts machine. If you listen to this man say anything and think that there's any hint of fact in it, you are a fucking moron. Yeah. Yeah. He's just really think about a political pundit. He's an idiot. That's just. Yeah. Do you find that women love your

show? I find that. That's a real question. They love that because of this. Love true crimes, shit. Love it. Yeah, I love it. That's like our audience is 70 plus percent female. Wow. And over 60% liberal.

So just by being here today, I don't know, million dollars gone. Sorry about that. I can send you a free t-shirt, but that would probably hurt you more. I'm again, I'm the kind of guy that doesn't give a shit. You want to look, come after me. Like, do it. This is a blessing, a gig like this is a black, like as, you know, I was just listening before this, while having breakfast, I was listening to your show with Mr. Mediker on the kill feed, and you guys are talking about it, like, yeah.

It's a fucking privilege to do this. This isn't gonna last forever, but I'm enjoying it, and I'm not gonna shut up and tell me what you want to say on my own fucking platform that I build. I don't care how much influence you have, you don't control me, you never will. So keep trying. You know, fuck off. I see you wearing that medicare, the sweetie squad. Yeah. I see that there. What did you think of our debate on the kill stream?

It was fun. I loved hearing all that info about COVID, but I was thinking back on that, you know, Medicare and I talked about COVID right when the lockdown first happened. So I was really pissed off. Not March. Yeah.

And I think everything I said would happen happened all the way. And I have predictions still outstanding that I think will come true still. Like I think that the government will set up a TSA style agency for viral infections like they did after 9-11. I mean, Homeland Security only exists because of 9-11. I, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, they do, they have proven to do nothing because the only thing that's been proven is that they are corrupt and steel and ineffective and should be fucking defunded. And I think they're going to do the same thing.

I don't know. What did you think about that conversation? Well, I watched that live and I was in the chat and I think I may have, I don't know if I did or not, but I think I may have, you know, thrown a little bit of shade in your direction or not. I don't know if I did or not, but I think I may have, you know, thrown a little bit of shade in your direction or not. I don't know if I did, but that means you're probably right. Well, my point is my whole point of view on this has gone like 180 and then 180 again several times since this started.

First of all, you were absolutely right and a lot of things you said, but so was Medi-Kr. And Medi-Kr was one of the first, not to be a fanboy, you know, wearing the shirt, but Medi-Kr was one of the, the first ones to call this out and say that this was coming and start to warn people about what was actually going to happen. And I give them a lot of credit for that, holy shit that he get that right. And the thing about it is, there is a point at which you have to decide whether

what matters to you, is it security or is it freedom? And I've started to switch over to your camp a little bit more. I think in at least in terms of that particular argument, and I know there's a lot of nuance and people change, at their point of view on certain specific things, but you're absolutely right in terms of. What's new on? Yeah, was it my aggressive arguing style that turned you?

What's new on? That's what we're all missing in. There's no nuance. I don't have any nuance at all. I don't, look, I don't know if you believe that it's, I don't think this was very clear, but I don't know if you believe that it's a, it's a, it's a government conspiracy. It's all fake. I don't think that's true at all.

I think it's a real virus. But I think that the control factor of this, we have to control what everyone does now. It's crazy. It's crazy. You know, a lot of these, and let's consider, it's basically the left wing going. We have to control what everyone does. So they wear them at their masks and they don't do this and they don't go to bars and they don't.

And then all these bullshit rules that they come up with, they have nothing to do with science, even though they're like, I believe science. It's all just control. And it turns into, we hate the government. And fuck America and fuck capitalism. Yeah, somehow. That too. It never gets to the banks.

It always gets to me and stops at me and it never goes to the fucking bank. It's not like America, fuck America, I'm like, okay, I'm listening. They have the ultimate masks. They will never get sick. Yeah. We're going to bring America down, okay? House, we're going to start at the banks. We're like, no, no, no, first first we gotta get rid of the police all right, and we're gonna steal about just shit and burn it down

Okay, then we're not we're gonna give all these people money like your money. All right Then what are we going to the banks after that? Oh, no, we gotta we gotta we gotta rebuild green Like are we gonna we're gonna fucking bank? Why are we going to the banks you guys deal with the fucking bank every day. How do you always miss the bank? Every time, every time. They never land in the bank. You think just randomly, randomly approached there and go,

you know what, you should look at the banks. I don't know, they're in the money, the root of all. Isn't that the temple of capitalism, the fucking bank? Isn't it? We hate Cap- Hey, America, hate capitalism. Guys, let me introduce you to wear it all who makes it possible ladies and gentlemen of black lives matter and antifa the bank where i can't

i can't see it all i see is you uh... so we're gonna go after you and that never never did they land in the bank and drives me insane. God, what were you gonna say, Mark? Are my, sorry. I love, I love when you go off. It's that fucking Hispanic rage. I fucking love it. Yeah, it is, it is the Hispanic rage. They would have, but it's about that.

Chase Wells Fargo, Bank of America. Nah, nah, they're gonna, they're gonna always side with, and here's the, here's the big problem with what's going on with this whole cancel culture bullshit since 2016, I say, 2014, you say, whatever it is, the fact that every corporation in America. The land that lets every possible capitalist urge take place is down with canceling all speech that isn't far left. What the fuck is that about? When did that happen? And how do we, how do we stop that? It happened because they're always running ads for their customer, which is 80% women. Women do all the shopping, so every corporation talks directly to them. If you're doing, I mean, 51% you're the customer. 60, 70, 80, 90% in some cases,

in some cases, the customer is white women so everything corporations say is directed is uh... is uh... marketed and is phrased and every thought every part of their corporate culture is directed is directed um... to white women so there it's like they've all teamed up to have this terms of service they traded the constitution for a terms of service that caters to only one demographic at all times It's insane and then we've all internalized this like it's our culture like this is well I mean that's all the companies are saying is I guess this is I guess this is our belief system

Well, I can't fucking escape it because the TV the TV and the between the TV and the fucking internet and you're Then you're fucking the TV on the internet trains your goddamn neighbors to come to your house and fill your mind with whatever seven things, you can, whatever seven dragon balls, you can entertain at the same time that you can't fucking escape, you can go out in the middle of the desert, some motherfuckers gonna watch and add

and then march out to the desert to make sure you heard about it. Yeah. It's like, oh, have you heard about the initiatives? They're like, no, just fuck off, I don't care. This ad just deputized me. Yeah, it's a nice ad. And make sure that you're playing by the rules.

It's a deputy here, a deputy ad man. Yeah, it's funny how close, I mean, you get into the thought crime, you know, you're getting into this territory that, the, I can't escape it. Hey, did you hear about that series on HBO, man? And off, no, fuck off, stop, stop telling me about these ads. Yeah, the control of speech and thought is probably the most insidious thing that can happen to just America really is.

It's fucking dangerous because we can control speech. If you can control speech and thought, you control action. Everything falls from there. Yeah. I don't think white women are stupid. I don't think any particular demographic is stupid. I think there's a lot of manipulation going on and it's, and there's an insurrection going on in this country. Yeah, well, they want to be safe. Women want to be safe. And

if you can convince them that something makes them safe, it's sold. Yeah. Doesn't matter if it's true or not. Yeah. I mean, sure. I don't think there's a big typing factor for why I think a lot of things are the way that they are. It's mine too. Like I'm afraid the government's taking my shit. Yeah. Who wants to be safe? Who's that? mundane man. Oh, you have a beef of him too. I'm just fucking with you. I'm fucking with you. I'm fucking with you. No way. How do you guys know each other? Uh, worse, uh, was scumbag, the scumbag internet, basically? Yeah, but he doesn't seem like a scumbag.

No, I don't, I don't want to talk shit about, uh, look, uh, he wrote, uh, he did a video on me and, um, and, um, wow, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, no, Mike doesn't seem like a scum. Matt, a fuck, I don't know Matt. You don't know Matt. No, I mean, it seems like a Monday and Matt. Yeah. He made a video about you, Mike. Yeah, he made a video about me when, when all the shit was going down with Wondery, when Wondery canceled me and took me down. And so I reached out to him and I was nice to him and we had a little conversation back and forth and he seemed very friendly. Like a few other people did, two Ian Miles,

Chong day. Oh man, that guy. A few other people did. And, but then I got to the point where I thought we were friendly enough and I asked him, what's up with, what's up with going on with you? Like a lot of people seem to hate you, what's up with that and then never got a response for that.

So, it's smart of him probably. Yeah, to just avoid it. I don't know. All the bad guys kind of seem to gravitate towards each other. Well, Maddox and Maddox. Am I a bad guy? No, that's what Maddox says. So he says, and Mike doesn't seem like a bad guy seems reasonable.

Have you ever thought about becoming a criminal to put like the ultimate ironic twist on your show? Yeah, and I don't want to give him that pleasure. I mean, I would love. There's, you know, how many, by the way, if you're lying, if you say no, okay? Yeah. Have you ever thought about actually killing someone?

I mean, every minute of every day. All day, every day. Are you ever thought about actually killing someone? I mean, every minute of every day. Every, all day, every day. Yeah. Multiple times, the same person sometimes. Yeah. Have you ever thought, honestly, I've been honestly awfully off day. Have you ever thought about fucking in a softagus?

Yes or no? Think about it right now. Like the feel of it? Or what do you think we know the answer? I think we know the answer. You know the answer. You already split in a hair. You know the answer. You already have split in a hair. You've got the everything. Why do you ask that question?

Well, because, wait, what question did I ask? Have you ever thought about killing somebody? Oh, yes, of course, because I get accused of it all the time. So this is the popular narrative. It's people who can't, there's a lot of mouth-breathing people that listen to my show too as well. So there's the, there's the whole, you know, 70 plus percent female contingent. And then there's like a good 20, well, yeah, good 20 something percent, mouth-breathing in cells from Reddit. Okay. And so those people, the white knights, and so those people are always like, well, you

know, this guy talks a lot about murdering babies and women. And so he must want to do it himself. And these are the people that can't separate like, I'm sorry, I talked with my hands a lot. I was just watching on the playback, watching, I'm like, I talked with my hands a lot. I was watching on the playback, watching, I'm like, I'm Hispanic. These are the people that can't separate fact from fiction. And so they see, they listen to a podcast about true crime,

and they think that the host is all into crime, and they wanna, he wants to murder people, and he wants, you know, he's like, oh, it's exhausting. This whole, and you know this, Dick? This is exhausting. This whole, and you know this, dick? Yeah. This is exhausting. Yeah.

It's like the guy selling all the Nazi memorabilia at the swap mate. You know, like you want to say, well, he's just selling memorabilia, but you might be a little into the, you might be a little into that memorabilia. Well, then again, yeah, you're right, you're right. But there's a lot of people don't know anything about where I came from and how I started this show and the fact that I tried like 17 other things and then they call you a grifter.

That's the best part. They have to come up with an insult for every sort of aspect of anything you do. So now you're a grifter because you tried different things, they didn't work out. Now you hit on this one thing and now you're super popular for it. So here's your insult. What's been some of your favorite stories?

I'm still reeling at the 70% women fans. I don't know how to deal with that, man. Getting it, talking to 70% female fans. Oh, baby. Whoa. Well, the thing is it's a podcast. I talk you, listen, interact with you. You don't have to have a, you don't have to tell me back what I said wrong. That's why it's so when it's people do that on social media and email, you know, and I respond

in a way they don't like. Yeah. You can do that. All right. Are you talking to these girls? I would give, I would get canceled in a second, if I had 70. Oh, there would be so many DM leaks. Forget it. I feel all encyclopedia of shit. I said to women. Uh, there, there was the whole and the hate train like you, you were asking, you were, you're looting to earlier, earlier, it started back in, again, 2016. I went on a forum for the My Favorite Murder podcast, which was starting to blow up then, but then became hugely popular. And a friend of mine, another podcaster said, there's a bunch of women fan-girling over you in the My Favorite Murder chat room in Facebook.

That's what I'm talking about. Yeah. And so I'm single at the time. I just got over a breakup. I'm like, yeah, what's going on? Yeah. I go in there and there there literally is like 200 plus comments on this one thread about me.

Yeah. And so I, I start to interact with some of those fans and some of them are saying some crazy shit. Like one of them said, I love his voice so much. I would love to sit on his throat while he talks. Yeah. And then that guy killed George Floyd. How you get a fucking usophagus just like that? So I'm interacting in a friendly way, not, you know, and just saying hello, ladies.

How you do it? And it's all joking stupid shit, you know. But the the the feminazi group that controlled controlled it that that that whole group like the the feminazi and admins were just like This is not okay. You cannot be talking to our You can't be flirting good naturely with the fan. Yeah, no, it's not okay And I was like who the fuck are you? I'm just having a conversation with someone else. Oh, what a nightmare.

And then they immediately banned me, blocked me, and deleted the threat shortly after. Oh, no. And now certain people in that group, certain feminazies had screenshot at certain things. And then they started to put them up on tumblers groups and Facebook groups that were private and talking about what a misogynist asshole I was. Yeah. And that's how it starts.

Sure. And then the more you repeat it, the more it becomes true. And so here we are in 2020, and I'm a misogynist pig, racist misogynist pig. Cuban. And here we are. That's how it happens. Ari just got into the studio.

Ari, do you listen to any? Hold on, once I do you listen to any true crime podcasts? Do you like the true crime genre? Oh, yeah. You do? I just haven't heard it in a podcast like that, but I like that. Okay, Sean needs to turn your microphone on. She's on five. Oh, so I'm five now? Yeah, I might have switched that. Okay, Sean needs to turn your microphone on. She's on five.

Oh, she's on five now. Yeah, I might have switched that. Check it out. Check that. Hi, Oli. How are you? I'm good, how are you? You look wonderful.

You look like such a breath of fresh air in the lockdown. Yes. Oh, thank you. I think I've crawled out of a hole and I'm just like, I forgot about makeup. Oh, this is, you don't have any makeup on. Yeah, I know, of course I have a great kidding. I forgot to put makeup on. I'm gonna put makeup on. Oh, this is... Wait, wait, you don't have any makeup on? Yeah, I know, of course I have not.

Are you kidding me? I forgot to put makeup on my face, but I'm saying it from not how to, so that's why I'm talking about makeup. How to, yes. I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like big True Crime podcast. All right, can you tell us why women are so turned on by True Crime stories? Probably this is spence from it, I guess. Maybe the eerie, scaryness of, I don't know, eminent potential danger, but then not. They love that danger, don't they?

Very destructive tendencies. Is there anything with serial killers in particular? Definitely was a thing. Have you ever dated a serial killer? No, I would have been here. Would you like to? Not a fan, not a fan. Right.

Okay, Mike, what makes you a rage? And then we're going to do the news. Thank you for calling in, by the way. Virtue signaling, just pretending like you're so much more better than everyone else. And it's such for such a dumb reason. It's you're just coming up with stuff. And you're not doing anything. No, really not.

You're just talking about how much better you are. You're just talking about how much better you are. You're just talking in sufferable. Let me see the receipts. You donated to anything to this virtue, this cause that you're talking about. Let me see the receipt. No You donated to anything to this, this cause that you're talking about, let me see the receipt. No, you don't have any money. No, you don't have any fucking money.

You just want to donate other people's money. Yeah, no, I agree with you, man. I think it's gonna get a lot worse, too. What would you see in the start of it? It seems like no one has a job. It seemed like it backed off for a brief period. And then it's full force the last few months. What happened to your, so I got a lot of tweets at one point, they're like, join project,

I don't know, two or something. What the fuck happened? So best I can figure it, somebody told MasterCard that some MasterCard told the bank that someone was doing something illegal. None of this was proved or told to me the bank is illegal. Voice speech is illegal. No, I have no idea what they did. I have no idea what they determined because they won't tell me. They just accidentally admitted or something. No, not fraud.

They didn't say fraud. Not you, but on somebody else. Not fraud either. They said the bank accidentally forwarded me an email from their compliance department that said, some, an entity I associate with is doing an illegal activity, but they won't tell me what it is. And they said they worked with MasterCard

to figure that out, implying that MasterCard informed them of it, but did not, and then the bet that I called them and they said, MasterCard told them, but they did not tell, and then the, I called them, and they said, MasterCard told them, but they did not tell them what, what they did, or who it was. So the bank can't remove me. So the bank put me on the, on the match list, which is a global blacklist for credit card processing.

I cannot, I cannot do business online anymore with credit cards, because I'm on the list permanently for like five years. But you have no idea why. No idea why. So I have to pay $10,000 to get a lawyer to write a letter to either the bank or master card to say, who the fuck is doing the illegal shit? Yeah.

And what's the proof? Yeah. It's not me. Yeah. Or I don't know, maybe the fucking police. If the police weren't so busy giving limperasted pats on the back to hippos and watching stores burn down, maybe the police could go to the bank or mastercard

and say, hey, I heard you guys know about something illegal happening. You want a fucking tell us is doing it? Don't you go arrest them? I would kind of like to stop that being associated with me. That's our job. I know the Patriot Act says it's your job now, but it's actually our job stop.

So you think you could tell us at least a name, at least wink. If we guess it, maybe Hector Salamonka, it out for us, if you can't say it, give us a blank like a fucking POW so we can go find this motherfucker and arrest them. But until then, it will cost me $10,000 to get at least to give and get, to even get maybe what it is that I'm being accused of and hopefully very nicely Ask the bank to take me off master cards list master card says we can't add anybody or take anybody off the list They're fucking there because it says on the wall. Well, I can't I can't take you off the list I mean you see the science is I can't take anyone off the list I have I have the list people come in put your name on it, and then they go.

But I, I mean, I, what do you, double, I can get a book. I knew what you want, I just called it out. I'm gonna call the department a list taker offers. Yeah, you gotta, you gotta go to the bank. The only thing that can take you off. It's that fucking magic spell, man. It's not a hex on the moon. Just cross my name off the fucking list.

You didn't say the incantation. Yeah, that, no, you gotta, sorry. We just hold the list. The bank comes in and puts it on. So, in reality, it's the most unionized thing ever. Oh no, no, well, this person picks up the paper clips. This person puts the paper clips on the paper. Oh, the pencil person, no, no, he's off.

The guy who tells you that the paper clip has been put on was fired, so I can't, I mean, I don't know if it's on or off. I'm just the guy that puts it on. I'm not the guy that tells you if the paperclips on or off, I have no idea if it's on. And I can't, if I put two paperclips on, I'll be fired. Right. So, well, I can't help you. I'll tell you what, though. I built my own platform because I saw the, the writing on the wall, once Sargon of a car got kicked off. Yeah. And then several other people started to drop off. I put it in place.

It's a $100,000 later to build your own platform, just so you know. What, wait, what do you mean? Wow. What do you mean? For me. Well, I'm a computer programmer, so I built the fuck, I built the whole thing drunk

and for fucking free. I built it, my, That's why it and for fucking free. I built I built it my I called project number two, buddy. You should hit me up. I would have built you that shit for free. No problem Um, I could easily built it for myself gone to the bank got the got the thing Even though fucking Maddox's lame ass will still call the bank and try to get me turned off that motherfucker Hounded patreon from months to try to get me turned off. Did that motherfucker hounded Patreon for months to try to get them to cancel, before he sued them, trying to get them to cancel my account,

caused me 25 grand a month. I don't know how he thought that would have worked. You'll be telling that story on your podcast if that would have fucking happened, by the way. You're lucky. You're lucky. If only I could get someone to hate me as much as my bad luck.

Oh, right. Well, just find some, you're his Batman. Find something that's, find something that's find something that someone loves and fuck the shit out of it for five years that'll do that'll do it. That'll do it. Whether it's a dog or you know a prize maybe a car that they a cherry car that they restored or I don't know the love of of their life. That'll do it for you. What was I talking about? So now I'm in a spot where it won one more on,

one woman working in compliance at the bank, got told by MasterCard something, so she ruined, so she ended the business, basically. No, but I have a Bitcoin and a separate one up now. I could build that shit in my sleep though. I just wanted to do it for everyone to see what the real issue is. Like why exactly is everyone so shady

about these de-platformings? Like why isn't Patreon saying what you did? Why do they have these self-destructive rules about hate speech? And it's because it's coming straight from the top. Like, the reason Google, Patreon, Twitter, and everybody has these insane hate speech policies is because MasterCard does. Yeah.

And all the high risk processors have the same fucking thing because the government through the Patriot Act, Patriot Act was number one, it says they have to stop money laundering and terrorism, but it doesn't say how or what that is. FBI can't fucking stop, you think the bank can. And then Operation Paperclip, from our Operation Choke Point from Obama,

made them stop hate speech, firearm sales, and stuff like this. So you have an army of compliance robots that have been trained to be not, that have been trained to be extremely proactive with censorship and also be us. Because of the specific operation choke point policies are also extremely liberal because choke point

singled out firearms. So you have an entire army of compliance managers that work at every firm like this that aggressively, I mean, choke point is gone, but the training still exists. It's the same people in the same job. Yeah, it doesn't just, you're actually, you're not a robot, so you don't just switch off like that. Yeah. Like, yeah, you've, you've had this in your head a while. It's fucked. I actually, I talked to a finance consultant yesterday about starting a bank. And a fuck, you know how much that costs?

Yes, $150,000, it would be based in Curacao. It would cost $150,000 and I would need to get two and a half million dollars into deposits and I think I could do it. I think I can do that. I think I can do that. And if I can do that, I would have to set up some kind of credit card processing. And if I had my own...

You have like a porn company on the side that I don't know about, how? If I can do that, and if I can get payment processing, I will control the compliance managers. And if MasterCard says somebody's doing something illegal, I can say, you fucking prove it. He cannot show me the evidence and I will ban their ass Immediately but until then but I need I honestly need a lawyer like I need a lawyer who owns part of it who will send these letters because my There's no winning. We're gonna lose

Fucking not I will say that. We will win! We will win! We will say that. We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win!

We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win!

We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win!

We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win! We will win! in front of me until I'm in the fucking ground. And I will end up there one way or the other. I'm going to do it taking people down as much as possible my fucking way. Do not, this is gonna be a bank. Right, it's gonna be the only bank run by a fucking psychopath on earth. And I will protect your goddamn money. I need to find it. First.

Anyway, Mike. I love you, Dick. Thank you for calling. I'm sure my girlfriend's going to go listen to show immediately when we're done. Well, Dick is planning his psychocratic human. The bank for and by a bank run by and for psychopath. Okay, Mike, thank you very much. I would like to deposit a dollar as soon as you open it up. So, you're canceled, I'm sorry. You're just contributed to a white supremacist. Cost of our number one, send you a zero zero.

Your account is everyone's gonna know it. It's zero zero zero zero zero zero zero one. Yeah. And that's very long gone. You have so many zeros in front. Well, it's optimistic. Yes. All right. I'll see. Well, it's optimistic. Yes. All right, I'll see you later, man.

See you later. Good one. Ari, Ari, Ari. I'm so far behind. How are you? I'm good. Let me get, that guy's cool.

Nice. He's cool. Let me zoom in on you. She has like a Rosie the Riveter thing going, except for she's somebody you would want to see on a poster I'm just talking tired of it man that binks shit That has got to be do it. Well, that's got to be about probably the most frustrating thing that you I would think you would deal with yeah is just I just want to have a show and

have a platform where people who make content that other people like can pay for it if they want to. Yeah. Just let some business be done. Yeah, you think? Is that too much to ask for? Yes.

Letting business be done. It seems obvious that it is. Ah! And that's unfortunate. What should I call it? Big tits bank. What's the what's why not? All right, let me get this do you mind if okay, Ari. Let's how's your lockdown? Good I started a taco business you started a taco business. You started a taco business?

In my building, I didn't really launch of giving it to a couple of people, but it's called a taco plug, or the other breakfast plug. And you get 10 J's, which are little tacos for 10 bucks. They're not three for 10 bucks, you can get a joint, which is a thing. And if you want to dab, it's a big aspirito.

And then we have the drip, which is like a thing. And if you want to dab, it's a big aspirita. And then we have the drip, which is like the sauce. Cocaine, you're mixing up your metaphors. Yeah, it's like the plug. So it could be whatever you want to know. What was that? Oh, that was your finger. But yeah, I was thinking of actually putting some like, to each see someone, but I was like, yeah, that's too far.

And then we didn't. And then the lockdown got, was over with. So it was okay, cool, nevermind, I don't have to do that. And then here we go. Now you do. So I was over with, so it was okay, cool, nevermind, I don't have to do that. And then here we are now. Now you do. So I have to go to Costco and get all the ingredients. I get all your taco ingredients. We hate everything instead of selling it.

Just because you're fucking. I know, it's happened too much. Everything. And it's because the dispensaries are essential and so are the grocery stores. Yeah. So what are you, what are you, what are you,

what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you, what are you thinks gonna happen exactly? Yeah, I don't know if it's ever gone to the fridge and I've been like I'm not hungry, but I have to eat something You got all this delicious food. It's what happened to me too And then they canceled my Pilates. So I got fatter than hell and then it was you look the same That is hell the nicest no The nicest thing anyone ever said to me You look the same

You because you dropped a bunch of weight. Yeah, but then you haven't. And the government fucked me over. Yeah, but I don't, you don't look like, you haven't gained it all back. No, no, no, no. I'm not 200 points zero right now. I don't look overweight. I don't look overweight.

You're the compliments just keep coming with you. You're the very beautiful, very, I don't look chubby. I better not try my luck, Sean. Those compliments are risking crossing the line into not compliments. I don't know what those are called.

I'm going to say that normal for my own. I have probably gotten Chubby in quarantine, so I'm like projecting that. Well, I don't think you look any different than that. No, something's getting Chubby right now. Is that a compliment, Sean? I don't think women take that as a compliment. I don't think that's really a compliment. Oh, yeah. If it's if Sean had said it, would it be a compliment, Sean? I don't think women take that as a compliment. If you are. That's really a compliment. Oh yeah, if it's Sean had said it,

would it be a compliment then? It's never a compliment when it's not on purpose. What do you mean? Like if it's not on purpose, if a girl isn't like purposely trying to make that happen and a guy's just like, yo, it's like. Oh, that's how it works. Oh my God.

I have to make them so day wanna do it, you know? Man, if somebody had asked me to explain how I was not a compliment before you said that, I would have taken forever and not have to be lions all over it. Like, no, I don't, I actually don't know. It should be. I don't know. But they just don't like it.

If they're not doing it on purpose, we're talking about erections. Yes, if you'd missed that. I don't want somebody wants to pay some bit, hey, I got an erection. Here's 40 bucks. It's like, okay, thanks for telling me. See now it's, now you've made it more complicated. I can make a business out of it.

I can make my wallet honey. I need it. I got a lot of things I need to say to Ari. It's gonna cost me a, I'll get up in ATM. Speaking of, speaking of erections, let me get this gentleman on. I don't know what he wants to be called. So I'm going to let him introduce himself. This is the wonder bread guy. Are you there, sir? Is my mic on? Yes, it is. It is.

Hello, Mr. Masterson. How would you like me to refer you as? You want to be called Dick Richard or just Mr. Masteron. Dick is fine. Please introduce yourself. We have a very beautiful woman in studio with us today, Ari and Sean, you might know. Please introduce yourself to the audience and why they might know you or why you're here. My name is Merlogic. I was referenced on one of your streams by a man named Vito, who I talked to years ago.

We were going to originally have a conversation between the two of us, but he got unbelievably busy, I guess, so that never really pulled through. But recently he went on Reddit and he gave me a message about, hey, we referenced you briefly on one of our streams. And I wanted to show you this clip. So he sends me a link to a private YouTube playlist where it's just a big playlist of all of your previous recordings and around the one hour 18 minute mark of the recording. Vito brings up my name and passing and you guys only

really bring me up for like a whole two minutes but I'm not sure if it was you or him, but like one of them mentions like, I wonder what race this guy is. I wonder if he's black. And when I heard that I cried with laughter for like a good 90 seconds. You are the one, you are the wonder bread guy. You are the guy who's paying artists to create commissions of white women buying wonder bread with and they have chain saws. Is that right? Yeah. Okay, I'm bringing up some of these artworks right now, so Ari can see. Let me put it on the screen. Actually, Ari, if you're interested, I got brand new projects I can share with Chad if they're

interested. Yes, she's very, she's nodding. She's very enthusiastically, but she's interested. These are brand new. I just paid for them a couple of days ago. You know, we just dumped them in the general chat? Yes, please All right here. Let me go grab a couple of my recent favorites So some of these are still in pre-sketch form so they still need some work But uh progress is being made okay, so while I'm going to be dumping some of these out Can I just say that I didn't really think about it like ahead of time

But when I was talking to you via email it didn't dawn on me that I was talking to Dick Masterson. And when I thought about it, I'm like, wait a minute, big Masterson. I the fuck have I heard that name before? And it dawned on me. Wait a minute, Dick Masterson, that's a mediocre friend. I am talking to Jim's best friend. I'm like, you know how much I would

kill to fucking have a conversation with Jim? I will punch a baby. You have no idea what an honor it is. I've been pondering to speak with you. I've been pondering about your your wonder bread pictures forever. I don't do you know when the first one of these that you did was, it seems like, I mean, it's like, it predates the cum jar. I know that. A guy collected several jugs of his semen and on Christmas day every year, he would post online his years, the years harvest, so to speak.

Here's the thing. The ventil of one. Here's a common misconception people don't understand. The artwork goes all the way back to 2012, but the fetish itself goes all the way back to when I was three years old. Wow. Okay, please dump your load in the chat and I'll put it up and tell us about this fetish of yours, all about it.

Okay, so I hope you guys are ready to go to Clown World because I know you're already there, but we're about to go dig ourselves new rabbit holes, so enjoy the ride. Please, take us on that. Did you dump the pictures in the chat? Oh, no, not yet. Fucking, I got on a tangent when I wanted to bring up the fact how I didn't think I would find myself in a situation where I would talk bring up the fact how I didn't think I would find myself in Situation where I would talk to the guy known for the Ralph report. I am a big fan of you and the concept of IBS in general despite the fact

How a lot of people have made their career off of IBS And I did warn Riley in advance that I was going to go off on a couple of people because I thought to myself You know, there's probably never going to be a on a couple of people because I thought to myself, there's probably never gonna be a time, I'm never gonna be able to do this again, unless you enjoy the concepts of me being here so much that I could probably do it again, which I'm all for. Yeah, either so.

Yeah, so I'm just gonna get this off my chest right now. Wait, let's do the bed, Brad first. Let's do the wonder bread first, and then I'll let you say whatever you want. I've got some of your images here Let's do the bread first. Let's do the wonder bread first, and then I'll let you say whatever you want. I've got some of your images here that I found on Know Your Meme. Oh, yeah, here, let me post these new ones

because I'm kidding this track. Here's one of my favorites. This is from my friend, Jertalus. This is of his OCs, it's Princess High Ground and his other OCs, Cassidy. This is one of my favorites. I paid over $100 for this one. Okay.

This seems to be a comic about what are these women doing? I didn't think my, I didn't think wrecking my ancestral home would be so satisfying. The red head says, oh yes, so many commemoratives and knick knacks to destroy, and they're destroying their apartment. No, no, no, no. All right, so here's the thing. The wonder bread thing that is new, a relatively recent, the origin behind it is one time,

long time ago when I was very, very young when I was still living in Cloverdale. I was a very weird boy. I was going through changes at a rapid rate where you really wouldn't think would be possible up until it was around the time that you would reach puberty. And I was going through moments where I felt like I was doing things ahead of schedule that you wouldn't normally think to. So don't be too hard about that. But like, like, like too hard, yeah. You just got a restoration.

Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that? Yeah, I thought I discovered something super. I was homeschooled, so I had no idea what sex was. So I thought I discovered something so unique that no one else had. And I like masturbating. Yeah. Oh wow. How did you discover? I don't. You don't remember after all. I knew it. I knew it. I remember that. I just remember like yet. That you discovered something wonderful. It sounds so much more magical when you're saying it. Oh my God. Okay, so what happened then, Mur logic? So I am, oh fuck, these are some old ones, fucking, I better post them more while I'm talking.

So back when I was young, I learned very quickly that I had a fetish for absolute destruction in Mayhem and it overwhelmed me to the point where I just got so worked up that I just had to let loose and release a bit. And that's how I discovered it at a very young age. You know, most people don't discover it until they're like 10 or like 12.

I discovered it when I was like three, maybe even five. What? And really? Yeah. Wow. You kidding me? I told you we're going down a rabbit hole. This is you've posted one of your commissions and it's a blonde woman telling a black

hard woman get those fucking workers of yours to quadruple production. If you think this will be the fucking girls in that picture. That's a Sami Sado from Legend of Korra and that's Pacific and Northwest from Gravity Falls. Okay. How could you, Ari, how's the woman supposed to compete with this? I'm not. You don't. I'm not. I'm not.

I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not.

I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. and when I broke up with that woman, it basically domino effected into what you see now. Some of these are commissions that I personally bought from just various commission artists. Others are actually freebies because they love my fun little antics so much. They draw me free art. It's like here home boy on the house. You know, I appreciate that.

Is this a woman that's blonde woman with a chainsaw? Yeah, that's a cool ass chainsaw. Ah, with a plunging, just wearing a jacket with huge tits. She's got a wonder bread chainsaw above her head. And she looks like she's very maniacal. This is one of yours as well. There's tree stumps all around. But here's another Pacifica picture.

Wait, but when did wonder bread go? Why wonder bread are you on that stuff? That's the thing, right? Why wonder bread? All right, so that's the thing. Why Wonder Bread? All right, so here's the other thing I wanted to do, because I know I don't have a whole lot of time. I'm only been given 30 minutes, but I have with me a copy pasta that I personally wrote down for this event that I'm just going to dump in the general chat.

And I was wondering if one of you would like to read it out loud to people so you could finally understand the concept behind everything about this. No, I want you to tell me. Why the wonder bread? Why wonder bread specifically? All right, so I must just read the copy, Paul. So then it is a parallel on how normally society identifies negative stereotypes, but they only ever stereotype it in a certain way. The fit's the narrative. Let me explain. It's like this, how often do you watch cartoons or animation or any variety where they decide to do an episode Where the theme of the episode is about spreading an environmental message or they create a character for the sole purpose of helping to spread an

Environmental message when people animators or writers whatever Pull on whatever feel the need to make plots like this Fucking whatever feel the need to make plots, like there are type of choice of how they write an episode, like this, like let's draw a white tall shady looking, sometimes fat, really depending upon how cartoonish the quote, cartoonish, the cartoonish and question,

billionaire one dimensional character, doesn't care or think about the long-term consequences about his actions, because as long as it continues to make money in the short term, he doesn't give a shit. Now, I think of myself. You watch shows like Captain Planet and there's like a Vroog's gallery of villains. But you think to yourself, wait a minute, there's one female in that whole group of villains of the rest are just guys.

And you watch any other cartoon that's not Captain Planet but wants to do this trope. And they say to them, they go like, you know, let's just, you know, make it all dudes, you know, because you know, it's more definitely way, way, way, way. Why the wonder bread? Why wonder bread? Well, the reason why it's that is because if you watch stuff like food ink or like, you know, you go on any of like green piece podcasts or whatever they like, they talk about how a lot of of like green piece podcasts or whatever they like. I talk about how a lot of things that are made in this world are made with something called palm oil, which results in massive deforestation. Okay.

And that is partially the reason why it's like that. The other reason has to do with the relation of when I broke up with my ex and I was about to have sex with her one day and I touched her tits for the first time and I was trying to describe the texture of her tits and I was singing to myself, alright they're soft. What's the softest thing I could think of to describe the texture of her tits? Wunderbred!

That's your right, you're right! They do! Oh my God! And it's the fluffiest bread, it's like that process bread, that artisanal bread is like that. Yeah. Wonder bread and artisanal bread.

Artisanal. Artisanal. Women's anointment. Artisanal. No, that's a new name of bread that they're shoving down a throat. It's white bread and it's called artisanal. Artisanal. Artisanal.

Artisanal for the inner cities. Yeah, must be. That's what they're called. Isn't that what it's called? Artisanal. Artisanal. You haven't seen it. You haven't got to the Mexican cities. Yeah, must be. That's what they're called. Isn't that what it's called? Artisanal? No, you haven't seen it. You haven't got to the Mexican stores around here like I do.

No, I would, no, I'm not allowed in there. Do you agree with the Wonderbread comparison to breasts? Yeah, actually, yeah. I feel so, yeah, I mean, it's different depending on if they're real or fake, but I guess you can have a little bit older Wonderbread and you want to, you know, it's like the comparison. My breasts, probably, maybe they're a little bit older wonder bread. No wonder, you know, it's like a comparison. My breasts, probably, maybe they're a little tougher

than wonder bread. I'm experimenting right here. What about you, Sean? What do your breasts feel like? I'm just gonna do around, I like to do around the errands and look at good, maybe like a marble rye. I don't even feel, you know, marble rye for apps. Like a marble rye, you wanna check? Are you sure about that? So yeah. Alright, obviously, you know, marble rye for an apple. You can marble rye, you want to check?

Are you sure about that? I think so, yeah. All right, obviously, you know, I ask everybody. I already know what I can feel like. I don't know, yeah. I would say like, what's that, pumper-nuckle? I was just gonna pull that out, because it's a funny name. Pumper-nuckle, that's the way it tastes the best.

I didn't know you could have a right answer to that question, but you knew. There could have a right answer to that question. They're actually as a right answer. I thought it was the whole thing was women, violence and sandwiches. Because men like sandwiches and they think women, yeah, that's what I thought it was that. But I mean, it could. It's because of tits.

So you have a fetishized, have you ever had sex with bread? More logic? That's a yes. Yeah. So I once tried to make a flashlight out of a bag of wonder bread, it didn't go as well as I wanted it to. Wait, but I already saw it. That's why I was like, I'm sure that this has already gone down.

I already like, how did you try to make the flashlight just like by poking your dick through a loaf of bread or did you do anything more complicated? Kind of so I took the bag and I turned it on its butt and I cut a hole in it Just big enough for it to fit in the problem is I thought all right So it's just gonna be soft on the inside. I'm just gonna do my business fucking release and throw it in the trash I fucking had crumbs over my bed Yeah, I'm so doing in my bed. I'm like fuck. You ain't doing it in your bed. Why'd you do that in your bed? Yeah, I'm so doing it in my room.

Are you kidding me? It's romantic. Is it romantic? Did you have candles on? And like the spread of cheese or something like that? Yes, because Lord knows I fucking, you know, I lit all the fucking Gwyneth Paltrow, sent it candles, I fucking had roses.

I lit it the ground. I fucking, you opened up a bottle of bubbly and I walked if it's like, hello. Is it me or your looking for? That's sarcasm. That's not the way I was. I was that too far. I don't know, aggressive you are.

That's better. Yeah, fuck yeah, I fucked the bread. My bread wants to tell you. What about like a bread, a wonder bread, fleshlight? Instead of a, you, I tried, but like, you know, it couldn't do it. Fuck, and I had people tell me, no, no bro, your fucking technique was all wrong. You're supposed to put something in between the slit and spread the bread out before you fucking release inside of it.

Is what you did was you found the hole in the bottom and you just went straight right in. He found other bread fuckers? Are there other bread fuckers? Is that what bread tube is about? And I keep hearing about? No, I don't think it is. You heard it, you know. You met other guys who are fucking bread? found other bread fuckers? Are there other bread fuckers? Is that what bread tube is about? And I keep hearing about? No, I don't think it is.

You heard you. You met other guys who are fucking bread? No, I fucking think I'm like a lonely man's island. I'm out in the middle of the open sea. I don't listen a lot of old ones in this fucking chat right now. Well, I'm trying to get the new ones. Oh, but you had people telling you how you should have done it. Yeah.

Huh. How many of these pictures do you think you have in total? All right. So if you were to fucking make like an estimated guess, you'd like to take the collective total of every commission I ever bought and made into one fucking final totally. Be somewhere in the millions category. Damn. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, say that again.

There's millions of. You have millions? No. No, I fucking, if you were to take every commission, I've ever bought, from the first commission I ever bought, all the way up to the most recent commissions I've bought before the start of this podcast. And you were to tally up everything I've ever bought

in like a collective total. It'd be somewhere close to like the high millions category. Of money you've spent commissioning photos? Yes, in 2012. Oh, are you fucking serious? How much money do you have? What do you have? You don't want to do that?

Actually, women come over with Wonderbread. You could, yeah. And you could have, have you ever hired a whore to do this for you? Like, Wonderbread stuff? And James Bond? People have joked and like, nah, I wouldn't be the same because, you know, my mind is kind of chaotic

and the reason why commission is so option is because I can hyper delegate how commission looks and it can be as absolutely ridiculous as it wants. Could you imagine me calling up on a call up girl? I ask her to fucking bring Wonder Bread. She think it'd be a joke. Um, I mean, who cares what they think? That's the fucking point of horrors. You, you micromanaged a shit out of them.

They'll do exactly what you want. I'm fully in agreement with that. You go to LA and you fucking high-rolled up until like any hor, they will fucking let you shit in their mouth. I've seen satin princes who are fucking pay half of their fucking income, just a fucking flex on American horrors and fucking piss all over them. I guess that too. Do you have any desire for a real woman to do it? Flex on American horse and just piss all over him

Do you have any desire for a real woman to do it or is the image like more erotic to you because it's The image the image is more than enough if anything my Goal in life one day is to one day have like a miracle of Christ happen. So as Jesus sends from the heavens Yeah, home you look, you enjoy doing your commissions, but how would you like a team of animators? If I could animate my fetish, what would you animate? What would you animate? You could do it with all the money. I would just essentially just take everything that I would normally commission and I would

pay somewhere close to like Mizaki money or even like fucking Disney and it's prime money just for a series of animators. I fucking go all out. I'd pay like 2D traditional animators, just anything that's like top shelf. And I go just pay head, just pay for it like commission. What, what would you commission? Like what would it be? I mean, would it be sex related or would it be destruction related or both?

Oh, destruction related because you know, that's what gets me off. So it would be white chicks with the bread sowing down like a forest. But it would, but it'd be subtle. It'd be like told in the form of a story. Tasteful. Tasteful. Yeah, fucking knowns. I've always wanted to have my own cartoon

and I've been running it back in my head for years now. How I would fucking write that cartoon and how I would do it is I would fucking write a story about a girl who was down on her luck. She got fired from her job. She would go to a bar one day and as she's about to what's her name or something? What's her name, Ari?

Can the girls name you, Ari? I was just gonna say, I'm a kind of a Jennifer, but I guess in this fucking hypothetical context her name can be Ari if you wanna call her that. Why is her name Jennifer, though? Why is her name Jennifer? That name is synonymous from the fact how one of my previous girlfriends was named Jennifer.

Awesome. Okay. Yeah. Then what? She gets fired from a job. She goes to a bar. There are people on the chat right now saying I should start a Patreon. No, fuck you don't waste your money.

Man, I want to make this happen for you. Tell me more about this story. The fucking underwater hamster guy makes like a thousand bucks a month. Oh, fucking, I love the underwater hamster guy. I'm so sad one of his hamsters died in the middle of his experiment. Oh, when? Oh, no, this was a long time ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. But he's got a new one. He got a new hamster. He named it Dick. Isn't that cute, Sean? If I'm sure it's in relation to you. Yes, it is. No. She would go to the bar, she'd sit down, she'd ask for something to add to her tab and the bartender would be like, not home, girl, you fucking pay your tab in months. It's in the high fucking category right now, so you pay your tab, you don't get any alcohol.

So she's really down in her luck. Now, all she wants to do is just drown her sorrows and then nice lady just comes and walks in. She's beautiful, beyond all description. Imagine Kellyanne Conway. You know, like, I'm a great description. Okay.

I'll be in Conway. Not who I would fix her head that this is a love it. This is a, some kind of a, it's either that or Denise Richards from undercover brother. Just like in that book. Yeah. So, just that foot. Yeah, so She sits down. Yeah, she sits down. She pulls out her checkbook. She writes a blank check and she slides it over to the bartender It's like I like to pay for this woman's tab They pay off the tab and she then turns to the woman. She's very sad in the process

But she introduces herself. It's like my is Abigail Uppercrest. I work for Chris. I did. I did. Yeah. I like it. My name is Abigail Uppercrest. I work for something called the brand. I was wondering if you would like to join my organization. I paid your tab after I figured it would be the nicest thing you would do. And she thinks about it, it's like, well, if this is like a job offer and what would I do? It's like absolutely nothing. The whole point of my organization is that you get to let loose levels of heedness and then wouldn't be even remotely possible if you were poor. So I just need you to do it.

So like the fucking devil went down to Georgia, she fucking snaps her fingers at a contract appears. It's like, just sign here. Don't bother reading it. That's not important. Just sign the contract and you would never have to worry about any kind of economic hardships ever again. She signs the contract. She's hesitant at first, but she signs the contract. Ari does. Ari signs the contract. She goes to the world where the brand is located. And

in the world of the brand, it's like this glistening utopia, something straight out of Logan's run. Like everything is perfect. But she notices the people who live in the brand are all females. All of the females who live there are extremely attractive. And what's interesting about it is all of people who live there signed away at different points throughout human history. Because why why important. It is important because you know

Abigail is not what she seems. She has the presentation of a human but she's not a human. I mean, why do you like that? Why do you like that? They're all from different points in history. Like this is your ultimate

fetish animation, right? Yeah, why do you like that? It's from different points in history because I this is your ultimate fetish animation, right? Yeah, why do you like that? It's from different points in history because I like the idea of avogades. Actually, it's Suckey Bessu has been around since time began. Has been going around to different points in human history. And manipulating women into wanting things that are not really practical, but we nice to have.

So just basically letting materialism dictate your entire life. And whatever favorite movies throughout history was the 1950s, where women were a lot more traditional back then. They were a lot more traditionally minded, or they were at least told to be a lot more traditional minded. Yeah, that's when they were good. It was easier back then. She would go up to regular housewives.

She'd go to like spoiled brat teenagers from upper class families. She'd sign their contracts away, and then they would go to the brand and as long as they were there, they would never age. They'd be hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years old, but they would look exactly the same as when they signed that contract. Okay, so what would happen in the brand in this place? So it's like a world filled with hedonism. Okay.

And you know, it's a world where you'd be able to do anything you'd want without any kind of room. They would take her to the dining room and it's all junk food and white bread. The lonely and wonder bread for you. Manace. Sorry, they fucking the wood. So they're eating wonder bread all day. So they would go there, there's junk food all over the patio table where this massive dining hall, like a magic

vahala, but exclusively for females. Jennifer, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if

I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I got it, if I Do you think you're in the human world now? And you're in the brand. Everything works the opposite. You want to eat like an absolute pig straight out of the spirit of the way. You go right ahead. You want to deep fry a white bread sandwich covered in fucking like mayo and bacon and like twinkies as bread, fuck, go right ahead. Go right ahead.

You'll never get a single calorie here. It's beautiful. And like she takes here, it's like this all seems too good to be true. You all just do this forever. It's like, yeah, this is the world we live in now. You wanted to live in a waffle of heathenism free restraint, fucking welcome aboard. It's just one problem. Yeah. What's the problem? The problem is when you sign the contract, you're here forever. So eventually you just get tired of it where you just just feel like, hey, I need a break. You don't get to take a break.

Your whole life is now focused around hedonism. Eventually, your selfishness gets to the point where it completely altars your personality. And all these cool characters that she's not like this. She just wants to have maybe a few good days where she can finally relax and have to worry about bills and the problem of having to worry about if if she's gonna have money to make it through the like a Bible character right? That sounds like a human who does it? Back to the jar, I'm marrically like an I need to go back to reality here.

Like you know, there's no you sign the contract that means you don't get to leave. You have to go fiddle contest. It's like you're fucking, it's like you're fucking mastercard rant. You just had it's like, you know, no, you don't get to get off the list. You're on the list. Once you're on the list, you don't get to get off. It's very good salesman. Are you do sale? Do you have a lot of money? Are you independently wealthy? Oh, fuck, no, are you kidding me? If I were independently, well, if I had George Soros money, if I had Ross child family money, you know what I'd be fucking doing right now?

I wouldn't even be on this call right now. Maybe in there. If it was Baker. If I had fucking Jesus Christ, fucking royal family money, fucking all kinds of like fucking billionaire, fucking 13 family, luminonium money, I'd fucking. Oh God, I'd just be brainstorming non-stop. I've had like a fucking four. Four yards. I have a full break down which is just mega dump with all my fucking ideas. It's like a brain tsunami. I know. I know. His commission artists. I always love free art. I fucking love it.

I'm looking at your your comic, your recent comic. We'll go ahead, you. I think there we have, there's one question we've all been avoiding. What's that I think is what happens when you go to the store and walk down the bread aisle? Oh, yeah. I think it's a bit of a layer of rice. What are the reverends for beating off? Yes. Yes. Okay. Do you ever look for the newest breads out?

Oh, yeah. If there's another like if Roman meal puts out a limited edition. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good question, John. Here's what I do. I go through the bread aisle at my local safe, where I grab a white bread off of the shelf and I fondle it and I sniff it. Like, you know, the way I digate would sniff a woman's panties,

like straight out of the fucking dirty clothes bin, and I touch it pleasurably and then I put it back and be like, you know, you know, you know. Ah! So anyone could be eating molested bread. Ah! Ah! Ah!

That's a serving. He's projected his horrid desires right into the look. Are you guys writing the chat right now? I'm dying. No, no, no. It's like this man is on the plane of reality. It's not even possible.

You really are. I'm looking at your new comic and it says the redhead girls says, oh, no, they're destroying their house. And then the redhead girls says my strict religious father will be very disappointed. And then the redhead girls says, oh no, they're destroying their house. And then the redhead girls says, my strict religious father will be very disappointed. And then the black hair, the black hair girl spits in her mouth. And then the redhead girl chokes, puts her in a half Nelson and said, who the fuck does that? And that's where the comic ends.

So when I went to jerk Douglas and I was pitching this commission idea to him, I was like, all right, so you ever watch porn? You ever watch a daddy daughter porn and say to yourself, you know, all kinds of crazy shit tends to happen in like this. It's like completely unrealistic. Like, you know, you look at these girls

who are like in their 20s and 30s and they're lopping like their 13. And you're like, you know, this is completely unrealistic. Man, you know, I can see why people fucking find this so hot. I was thinking to myself, what if you were to like make a comic of your two OCs, Princess High Ground and Cassidy? I want you to dress up Cassidy,

like a pretty princess, and I want High Ground who's absolutely wretchedly spoiled fucking spoiled brat. There's never been discipline to punish daughter entire life if she's lived on a level privilege as beyond anyone's either understanding. And she goes and she treats her,

Cassidy goes and treats her, like she's some kind of fucking financial toilet. Like, you know, she's just straight up whipping out money throwing out into the air, like fucking monopoly confetti and like she's just grabbing it and she's like, you know, I will pay you, I will pay you any amount of money to act down a way that you would never act normally before.

So here is like a million bucks. I want you to go wreck your house and I want you to enjoy it. I want you to, yeah. And before the Wonder Bread thing, before the deforestation thing, it was a destruction fetish. And that all started when I was three years old. And that first started when I was watching an episode of Dexter's Laptopory. And that's his lab did this to him.

Where Dee Dee fucks up his lab or Mandrake's lab. Oh my God, are you kidding me? I knew it. He's talking to me. He's talking to me. Oh, he's talking to me. He already knew it. I knew it.

I knew you were a genius in my fucking slide, you dick. You're already fucking Galaxy running him. It's like this fucker watched Dexter, didn't he? He saw Dee Dee and he just fucking coomed in his pants. Fucking, I knew it. I fucking knew it. I fucking love you, Dick. I fucking knew you were already ahead of the game.

Well, this has been extremely educational. The Wonderbread mystery saw forever. I completely agree with you. What about smash rooms? Have you ever had a yeast infection? Oh, funny thing you mentioned that, there's actually an organization somewhere in New Jersey where very wealthy spoiled brats are actually fucking allowed to go to a private garage somewhere.

And if they pay a good decent chunk of money, they're given anything they're allowed to break. We're talking like expensive cars, like Teslas, fucking grand pianos, portraits, and they pay a fuck ton of money to do this. Wait, what is- So would you like going to a smash room with a woman? Would that turn you on?

It would, but you know- We went with Jamie Lynn Hughes to a smash room, not she was before she went insane. Like, Ari, I'm sorry if this sounds weird or not, but envision yourself in this scenario. Like you're in a smash room. Like how I would go down is you would scale it up on like a sliding scale. So if Ari were to be the one to do it,

I'd want her to like go to like the first object she would see is like say a lamp or a vase and then she would like pick it up and then she'd drop it and then be coy about it's like oops, it just fell out of my hand. That you say that's how far it for him? Could you, is there you comfortable saying oops it fell out of my hand? I could do an R&B. Oops it fell out of my hand.

And then it, and then it, and then it, and Chris, it just gets more and more insane as it goes on because you know it's on a sliding scale. No, it's, it, it has to be that way. No, I understand how getting off works. All right, all right. We got it. We have to read the news. This has been extremely, I'm really glad you called in Sean.

Are you having a very informative? I'm very disappointed. The chat fucking loves it. You can call it again. Loosen their mind right now. You can call in, say what you wanted to say about internet blood sports. And then I got to go read, we got to go read the news. So, I hate on every anyone you want.

I don't care. There's absolutely no fucking way. This is going to get out to anybody because Yeah, so hate on every anyone you want. I don't care. There's absolutely no fucking way. This is going to get out to anybody because, you know, I would love more than anything in the whole wide world to talk to people like Vos and Sargon and Destiny and just call them all fucking retards because they're clearly, you know, they're pseudo intellectual as you pretend like they know what they're talking about.

Like I'm going to take the opinion of a fucking Applebee's manager. But this is one of the managed Applebee's Sargon. take the opinion of a fucking Applebee's manager. But, this one of them managed an Applebee's. It's our gun. Yeah. He looks like an Applebee's man. What do you do? Okay.

Oh, like pan-European politics. Go ahead and fucking. This is Val. One final thing before, yeah. One final thing before I go. Do you think, like, later today, when you're like, you know, editing the stand and like getting all the raw footage,

can you like, just cut out my part and then then like just send it to me or just send me like the direct link and then tell me? I'll post it. I'll post your part. The world needs to know about your whole scene. Yeah. I love to fucking breathe the chat in real time while doing it because you know, this chat is fucking incredible.

You're gonna have to scroll back and read the chat on your own. I'll send you the video though. It does anything make you a rage? I ask everybody that. And do you pee? When you pee, do you go through your fly or do you go over the waist, do you go over your waistband? Do you pull your shortstound

or do you put your dick through your fly? You're as a diaper of bread. Are you fucking making it seem like I'm low to your gun? I just pissed in a sink or I reuse a fucking piss bottle? No, some men pull their waistband under their penis when they pee and some go through the fly. It's, yeah. Got it.

It's saying like an R10D's copyposs in my guy. I'm not waiting for bitch mommy to come change me. So which one is it? It's nuts. Fucking if I'll piss in a bottle, I'll piss in like a toilet. Not a bottle. When you piss in the toilet, do you put your dick through the fly in your underpants or do you put it over, okay?

All right. Yes, because I'm not good. It's your God who thinks pissing in toilets is a sanitary. No. Okay, and what makes you a rage? Well, it makes me rage, fucking the fact that coronavirus has essentially made my artists like lose all motivation to draw me things at a reasonable rate. I still have things that are not even done.

I paid $100 for a commission. I haven't even gotten yet. It's still in pre-stitch form. Yeah. How much of your day is dedicated to your commissions and getting more of them? Every day since 2012, from the first season, Legend of Cora.

Which word I'll start it. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. All right, what do you think? What if a guy dropped this on you? Could you do it for him? Oh. Underbred. You got a slow boiled them into it, you know?

I would say whatever it's like that is for you to go for it. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, let her answer. Are you going to say it? Yeah, I say whatever it's like, what's your page to go for? I'm full support on that full send mode, but I not necessarily. You're not gonna... What if he looked like Hugh Jackman? Just do that over there.

What if he was without me? What if he was very handsome and rich? I would say whatever it is you have, but I mean I'm not gonna get you, I'm not gonna turn on by that, but whatever, like he makes your bow, both fuck yeah, whatever you want to do like you know, go what he wants you to hold bread and you know, have whatever slather slather I'm not much money. Nice.

She fucking can't do it like I could pay her a thousand dollars and she feel uncomfortable. It's like no, I'm a good nice wholesome Catholic girls found the way with Christ. All right, all right, Merlodzik, get out of here. Thank you for calling in. $1,000 as well as fuck, homie. I'm talking about a relationship, not some kind of an indecent proposal. Thank you, Merlodzik, for $1,000, he would do it.

No, no. It's truly fucking come back here again if you invited me. Yes, I will. Goodbye. Goodbye for now. Thank you it. No, no. It's really fucking come back here again if you invited me. Yes, I will, I will, goodbye. Goodbye for now. Thank you for calling him, bye. Okay, well then, what do you think about that? That was intense. That was intense.

Yeah. Yeah, I love that guy. Very informative. Are you clearly thought his way all around the issue? Yeah, right, what he's into. He's really, I mean, he's got that story off the top of his head. That's his movie, his animated, he's got a screenplay partially written.

I don't understand why he has so much, if he spent so much money that why wasn't he doing man-a-may or virtual reality? Virtual reality. You have the bread with you, virtual reality, like all these chicks, whatever, like breaking things, like he could be spending money on that

if he doesn't want to get a whore, like, or whore, you know? Don't you think? We're some surprise- I'm surprised he has a million on cartoons. Like, yeah, maybe he likes all the variety and one animated movie, like you sink your whole wad into the animation.

Oh, little clips maybe. Yeah, I feel like there are people that look like this all the time. It does. It's expensive and it takes a long time. Yeah, like it's like a whole eight hours will take like five seconds. You could play Mace himself. He has time now. Well, you know, you should learn how to animate. Yeah, he's going to be spent like he should be there every day, you know,

drawing a little stick man and oh, I'll make a flip. Oh, right. Now I'm getting hard over here. Fucking chainsaw. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Wait, look, I got this guy, see? And this one, or this lady, and now the tree is getting cut over with the chainsaw, right? Damn, that's sexiest fuck. All right, what kind of news do we have in store for?

Okay, Tesla's next giga factory. We'll be- Gigafactory. Gigafactory. Let's take it, okay. Well. You can pull the mic over just a little closer. A little bit.

We'll be in Texas. Of course, because everything's bigger and better in Texas. Thank you. Yeah, including the tyranny. Much bigger. Much bigger than in Texas. I resent now, and anybody says,

like, oh, California's cooked. You can come to Texas. We're all our dicks are huge. Like, you know, the fuck is locked down as well? Somebody told me, yeah, but we didn't want to do it. Like, we weren't as excited about locking down. Like, what the fuck is the difference? They're all, they're all getting it. They're all like all my friends out there all on the lake, partying, raging like they

know what's up in Austin. Everyone else Texas can't speak for that, but Austin, yeah. Yeah. There's still bars are still shut down. They though, aren't they? They're shut down everywhere. If there's food, they still have it open. There's some underground ones. That's underground. You gotta bring those back. I'm gonna open one of my garage. And the only rule is no one is allowed to come because I hate hanging out with people. Everyone.

So. So. I'm gonna get one of those OSHA compliance, you know, things, hand it over to the wall. Maybe I'll work out. Maybe I'll just stay in touch with it here too. Sure. But you have the option. But I'll be drinking no matter where I am work out. Maybe I'll just stay inside for a year too. Sure. But you have the option.

But I'll be drinking, no matter where I am. Okay. What about the jig effect? Okay. It's Tesla CEO, Elon Musk announced that Texas would be the location of the company's next gigafactory. Musk called the location gigatexas and noted it would be an ecological paradise with biking, walking trails. The location will also be open to the public during the call. Musk said, I've never been more optimistic and excited about the future of Tesla.

The 2000, oh, the 2000 acre facility will also be home with a Tesla semi and up and coming cyber truck. Oh, that's the end of Texas. That sounds lame. Bike trails and shit. Yeah. How about just a fucking office where you people work and then you a factory where you make cars? I bet it's gonna be an Austin, but it's somewhere around there. Probably. Why does everything have to be a campus?

Well, that's the hiking trails. Just go to work. Go to fucking work. Yeah. Don't make me go find hiking trails on the weekends. Yeah, like outside of works. Yeah. It's gonna be so beautiful that people are gonna wanna come

here on the weekends. Yeah. The public is allowed. Okay, we'll take our family hiking on our hiking trails. Fuck you stupid cyber truck as well. Yeah You know what? I can't talk shit about that thing that about the people who buy it because like everyone I know put a hundred bucks down for one of those fucking things. Did you? I put it in a throw rock through their other windows. I want the roadster. I want them to make, they say promise, like three years ago, they said that they were gonna make a roadster hardtop convertible. Yeah.

Nothing. Nothing. Now they're changing, and the Jews are in the roadster. They're making more stuff now. Yeah. We got truck now. Yeah, nobody asked for that. I didn't ask for that.

We're making a submarine. Actually, put 150 bucks down. I can do that. Maybe they did a boat. Oh yeah, we got boats. Just check. Just check it out. Just want? I can do that. You want? I can do that. You want?

I can do that. You want? I can do that. You want? You want? I can do that. You want? I can do that.

You want? I can do that. You want? I can do that. You want? I can do that. You want? I can do that.

You want? I can do that. You want? I can do that. I don't understand it at all. Okay, what's next? Uh, teen sent to juvenile detention center for not doing online schoolwork. Good. Excuse me. Mmm. You're ex-mute. That was like a three, but anyway, in a stunning turn of events, a 15 year old student in Michigan has been sent. What was the 10 sound? Oh, the sound was like a...

No, a belch. Yeah, yeah. A 10 is like, that's like a long drawn out. Like, yeah, I'm pretty proud of it. Barney from the Simpsons, you have been. I've gotten more in love with you. Quarantine really has affected you. My goodness. First time you came in, you were such a sophisticated

and classy lady, right now you're belching and rating belches, Jesus Christ. Oh my gosh, this guy was just fucking wonder bred. We can't be judging here. Who are you locked in quarantine with a longshore longshoreman a team of Union trash men who worked at the trash store Why so though that was a three Jesus

Okay, well anyways in a stunning turn of events a 15-year-old student from Michigan has been sent to juvenile detention during the pandemic after Judge ruled that she violated her probation by not completing her online schoolwork. The teen only identified to the public as grace had originally gotten into trouble for fighting with her mother and stealing, but had since cleaned up her act that had near perfect attendance to her school. Pro-Publica Records reports. You got to lock these. So she went, or records, reports. That's, you gotta lock these, so she went to Juvie for not doing homework.

Not doing online homework. Yeah, damn, man. You gotta attend, you gotta do your online homework. Or else you're not gonna have any opportunities in life. So we're gonna send you to jail. Well, I think it's because she was already on probation, so it's like, but still, like, probation system, not.

Yeah. They're fucked. Online homework. I don't know, how do you, how do you look at a kid and say, do online, I don't understand the concept of homework, to be honest. I don't know how you look at a kid. Yeah, you just sit there and fill out that form. I have to fill out forms all day.

You should too. Fuck you. I'm eating. Yeah, yeah. Okay, what's next? A US senator just introduced a bill banning airlines from booking middle seats or charging passengers for switching seats.

Oh, because of coronavirus? Yeah, I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so.

I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so. I think so. Hmm, for switching seeds. Well, Southwest, you don't charge anyway. It's like, you're not assigned to see, you just first come first serve. That's so annoying.

Well, unless you're first come first serve and you check in early and then- He doesn't do the correct thing. My dad does that, so I grew up with- Let's go, let's go, let's go. He's under 13, I was like 25. You can tell him, I'm gonna tell them you're under 13. Yeah, he's a fucking dude.

He's like militant when it comes to like traveling and how things go and how fast everything happens. Yes. And I am like that too. I don't know. Yeah, I am like that too. But the thing, man, the worst, it's worse than being molested as a child.

When you're 15 and your dad makes you pretend to be four to get to board a flight early. And you know it's coming, and you can see him itching to do it. Yeah, you'd rather go on to fucking Catholic school. I would rather be molested, be forced to pretend like, that you're not a big boy.

I'm a big boy. Yeah. I shave. Right. I am not pretending like I'm under 12. And you're worried about it the whole time. It's just anxiety that you don't need to have. That your stupid dad is making me live for you.

Yeah, like I'm complicit if I don't say anything. Hey, this is people like me cause the Holocaust. I'm, you're making me do it. I'm 15 and my dad has a tiny dick, so. I'm not gonna get a different airline with a sign seat. Yeah, don't tell them about that. Oh, I'm gonna tell them that I'm the 11. I'm gonna tell them that you have a small dick.

Yeah, since you don't, I mean, that's a lie. I know it's a lie because you, because I don't know why dads, you thought I was asleep that day, but I wasn't. Dad's showered with did you Did did everyone else's dad like shower with them as a kid like I remember what my dad's dick looks like I don't particularly like I maybe I do like that memory actually is now I don't I'm like yeah, that's nice. That's nice dick going on there. I like having that memory dad

As a dick don't want to have a Miserable when when when I talked to other kids. Yeah I have a dick no he has a dick. I've we talk to other kids. I'm not sure if you're dead. I'm not sure if you're not having a dick. No, he has a dick. He has a dick, I've seen it. He has a fucking dick. I'm not too proud to admit that I've seen it. I've never had a dick.

I remember like, I have a photographic memory of my dad's dick. Yeah, it's, well, it's not an emphatic. I'm not a moronic. I have it, I have it fucking permanently etched into my fucking your age. It's so much different than your dick. Right there at eye level. This is weirding you out Ari.

Every man has this memory I think. I'm on it. I'm on it. Is this weird? No, nothing really faces me at this point. I can't believe that guy so perfectly described tits as

wonder bread. Yeah. Um, were we talking about? For oh airlines. Yeah. What was the news part? Um, maintaining we talking about, oh, airlines. Yeah. What was the news part? Maintaining importance for social distancing during lengthy epidemics. Act of 2020, also known as the middle act will require airlines to block middle seats.

It would be, um, first federal law to require proactive social distancing by airlines on board, the aircraft. Why don't they just take the airlines over? Perfect example of a cutesy acronym, middle, right? Yeah. As the middle, I'd like to turn. Oh, we don't want people sitting in the middle, see, okay, middle.

Now, a brainstorm, send it over to the most of not just people in the world to try and come up with a acronym for this. Exactly. I fucking hate that, whatever that is. Yeah. Here's what my platform for Congress It's gonna be called the fuck you act and it stands for if anybody proposes one of these back-random acts anymore

Well, they'll be executed in front of right in front of the in front of the Congressional building paper clip So it'll take a while and whoever and someone's gonna say well That doesn't really match up with the it's gonna be called the f period you period Where's it stand for? None of your, it stands for your fucking moron. No more laws for these morons that want it. They do that. That's fair, platform one.

Platform two is the 50,000 max congressional district size. I'm gonna start creating a real platform. I like it. Of this shit. That unites the left and the right Wouldn't everybody want something like that. Yeah, yeah 50,000 reps. I'm gonna shop on his front door. He'll know he'll know your name was the number 30,000 originally The original amendment said it started to be and was supposed to grow to 50 and that's as much as it could without another representative at it Yep, that's, max 50,000. Did you know that?

Do you know about that, Ari? That there was, you know, the first amendment, the freedom of guns, freedom to talk about guns. No, it was freedom guns. Freedom should, I think, drinking something to do with the freedom of drinking whenever and wherever. Speaking of the street, go nuts. That was the original first amendment.

That's what he said. At this point, anything could be. Yeah, sure. We weren't there. Was the right to say the N word, I think, was the original, was that, I point, anything could be. Yeah, sure. Was the right to say the N word, I think, was the original, was I don't think that was the mouth. It was supposed to be to limit the size of a Congress congressional district to 50,000. Max, they're up at like a million now.

Really? Yeah, so you have no representation. Yeah, you're supposed to have representation from your area. Somebody tell a half a curl. Maybe you'll tell other people, and people will listen, you're supposed to have representation from your area. Somebody tell a half a girl for you. Maybe you'll tell other people, and people will listen to no one listens to me. So it's going around misquoting the first amendment.

So this fucking show. Okay, what's next? You came in fine for sending to be a ghost in the Mort Smellth cemetery. I mean, that's, I mean, shouldn't you just go home, you idiot. I mean, fine for pretending to be. That's hilarious. A man has been fine for pretending to be a ghost

and other rowdy behavior in a cemetery. 24 year old Anthony Stellard had been out drinking with friends. Yeah. That's what it happens. When they went to Kingston Cemetery. A irrelevant. Well, they said it a play football. A hamster police.

Knocking overhead stones. Spokesperson said the witness is complained to the police about seller's rowdy behavior and his pretending to be a ghost. Like why is that an issue? He's my foot, so he not even have a ghost costume. He just probably went, he was all drunk. He's been around, going,

ooh, that's stupid. He, uh, George Floyd gets all these protests. That guy, no one stands up for that guy. He does things on his own. Having a good time. If any of you that you're there for a funeral, someone pretending to be a ghost is gonna be funny. What about just stiffs?

It says, uh, to that, in order to pay a bunch of money, he also had an extra three months added to a conditional charge for previous harassment, which he was found to be in breach of. So he's already in probation, okay, that's why. He's my the vogueers, he need to start

the homeworks. He's coming judges. Guy, let's see probation will keep you from having any fun. So that can choose your spots. Yeah. Yeah. And if he does anything else, he'll be face up to 12 weeks in prison.

Oh boy. 12, what are you in for pretending to be a ghost? Right. You probably see what they do to people who pretend to be a ghost, the person. Yeah. He probably wasn't allowed to let like when you're in probation, you can't be certain place. So he probably wasn't allowed to be one drinking and two out at the end of the day.

That's cemetery. Yeah. After hours or whatever. So that's what you got. They bury you outside. They just roll your butt. If you die under probation, they just throw the bar,

you're like a garbage drinking in the cells, got booze from the cemetery. I hate cemeteries. Why do they exist? They're so fucked. I mean, I want to think about that shit. Yeah, it's a real, it's a real old human thing, you know, to bury your dead and then make a little statue.

And then know where they are. Yeah, know where they are. If anyone puts me in a cemetery, I will be fucking pissed. Oh yeah, no, cremation for me, for sure. Just throw my body in the freeway. Whatever, fuck everyone's day up. I had a shitty day. Everyone else should too. Yeah, let them think that they killed you.

Yeah, this. Here you go, ma! Yeah. And right, liberals did piss on. Oh my god. Okay, what's next? All right. The US Mint is literally begging for spare change.

The United States is in the middle mis-sevenation-wine coin shortage and the US Mint, which is in charge of producing new money, is asking people to pay with exact change and find other ways to return coins in circulation. The what? The reserve. Why? Actuates. ways to return coins into circulation. The what? The reserve. Yeah. The coin shortage, to most people shopping online, disrupting the regular flow of coins.

I don't really feel like people really use coins that much anyways. I feel like in a jar, like we all have a jar that just, or something that you just throw. I mean, I'm going to melt all my coins that out of spite. So people are just out of circulation. No, they're just being, I see, they're all just in people's homes. So coins up my ass. How about that? I got them rolled up, shoved them right up my ass.

Sean, how you like them now? Federal reserve. Yeah. You can have all the coins I have, but I could fit dimes up there. I could fit a 50 cent piece up my ass. Probably good God. Who's fucking spending coins?

No one. I think they can't like, people make fun, I guess, because they're not coming into circulation. So they don't work. People do laundry. People do, because it's fucking up the laundry industry.

Well, they have, they have, now there's apps on your phone for the laundry. It's like on your phone, you put on from your card and you just do it like this. This guy's never done laundry in his life. Always a beautiful woman does it for him. I've always done laundry.

That's true. I think we've told this story in the show before we were over at your house as kids. And the two I expressed and I did not know how to do laundry. And you guys did. Yeah. We're like, how did you get? We were trying to come up with reason. What is this amazing?

Yeah. We were trying to come up with lies for why our pants got throw up on them. Yeah. We're gonna, like just fucking wash them. We fell in the pool. Like all of these, like we're gonna wash them off and then make up all these lies. They're like, why are you just just washing pants?

Because they don't, do you? I don't know how to do that. But a wash do laundry. Ah, okay. What, wait, did you finish about the coins? I just said it slowed the production of it and third-party coin processes and retail activity accounts for the major. Majority of coins put into circulation according to the mint last year for example, those sources accounted for 80% so that's that. Yeah. Can I get rid of pennies yet? We're going to be we're going to I think

they are aren't they are they I think they're trying to get rid of pennies yet? We're gonna be, we're gonna. I think they are aren't they? Are they? I think they're trying to get rid of pennies because they're like trying to make it to where like just round up. So they're gonna adjust like the taxes for everything. Cause right now it costs more to make a penny than one cent.

Then one cent, yeah. And they're just annoying and they stink. Yeah, yeah. The smelliest coin. Even though there's like very little copper in a penny anymore, but you still have that coding or whatever. Yeah.

They should just round up straight to a dollar with all the money that they're printing. Fuck it. Yeah. We messed up. Whoops. We're upgrading. Dollars lowest one now. Okay.

What's next? Johnny Depp and Amber heard accuse each other of peeing and pooing all over their house. On Wednesday, the court heard arguments over her testimony that depotent had to spell her name in urine after a violent fight and depot delegation that her took a wapper poop on the couple's bed. People are in a weird shit in Hollywood. I'm sorry. I'm saying they want to say it again. They're, yeah, that just crazy. She said she posted that picture of all of his drugs that he was doing too. Did she posted that picture of all of his drugs

that he was doing, too. Did you see that? Yeah. Well, I mean, like, he's probably an addict and an alcoholic, but like, she's a fucking violent psychopath. Yeah. Yeah. She posted, I saw some people like clowning on her picture

as though it was staged. I don't know, because there was like a fresh line of Coke made and a tampon applicator next to it that she said he used this nor did they're like, oh, this is obviously staged, because that's a tampon applicator. There's no way someone would be snorting cocaine. That's like, well, yeah, that's usually.

I mean, maybe if you're into some weird shit, he's like, you're handling, he's your tank. Like, give me a tube shaped thing right now. I need it right now. That's the closest thing you have. I know what it is. Like, that's what the fuck is. Give me that. You can have that fucking trash can.

Because I need to get that in my nose right now. Yeah. Like these people, oh, he would never, he would only use a licensed cocaine snorting tube. Right. Okay. It says, Engian's attorney Sasha was questions witnesses about depth's alleged attempt

to spill her name with his own urine after a blowout fight that wrecked their rented home in Australia in 2015. The same fight that ended with depth's finger severed. Oh, the court also heard arguments over whether depth was angry or amused when feces were found in the couple's bed after a fight. Well, I can guess. I mean, it's bad enough that the cat spiked shits somewhere in the house. The woman does it. When the woman does it, that's really annoying.

They really are amused. A huge fight. It's a huge turn on the bed. You know, I don't know where fighting about any. Because that's fucking hilarious. Yeah. I mean, you know what? That is, you know what? I'm sorry, I was really glad to lie. I apologize.

I get it. You know what? I was really more frustrated about this. I'm coming work with a new director. And, you know, I just don't know if I'm right for the part. And, you know, I mean, you just, I can't stop acting like Hunter, I'm so stupid. You just put things in perspective and really just gave me the reset that I so desperately needed.

I love you. I love you too, honey. I knew you would see. Yeah. I see. That's why you get me. I mean, if he's trying to use a tampon applicator, then he's obviously in a somewhere,

it should so that might be his thing. I don't think it's that weird to snort Coke with a tampon applicator. I mean, literally anything. Can I, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I You use besides like you think that until you need that cocaine and you as quickly as possible So he doesn't have a dollar dollars is disgusting Like is it cashless? You know maybe your wallet's downstairs the tampon tubes right there I don't know where my fucking wallet is You can roll a piece of computer paper. I guess

Don't have a section to get it up there. Just dump the bag. I like it. As a mistake. Get it to the bone to your eye. Just, ah. No, if you turn the bag over like a, like it's like the bag's like this, and you cut a little thing, you could just like,

maybe. I've seen people do it off interest thing. Corners of credit cards. Yeah, you got it. You got it. Corners of credit cards. You do it off the bat. A bump, maybe, but you need a whole line.

He wants like a scoop. Well, so a butter knife bump, I don't know. You can get a pretty big scoop on the corner of a bump card. A bump, maybe. You need a whole line. He wants like a scoop. Well, so a butter knife bump. I don't know. You can get a pretty big scoop on the end of a credit card. I don't know, no big blind. Sometimes you want the accomplishment, the feeling of accomplishment that goes with doing an entire line.

Okay. I said I've just a bump. I have red on mine. Yeah. Okay, what's that poor guy? Really fucked up with him. You believe that? Be so rich and famous and like the sexiest man in the world.

You make these sorts of decisions. I don't need a dad. He needs to call me. Right. Run his decisions by me. Yeah, and probably a new bed spread. Yeah, I would say, Johnny, what are you doing dating famous? What are you doing dating famous woman?

What do you mean, idiot? Why would you date a not a famous, right? What the fuck famous woman? What do you mean? Idiot. Yeah. Why would you date a not a famous, right? What the fuck's wrong? There's house broken. Yeah. And don't let her be famous. Yeah.

Kill her crew. If she wants to be famous, ruin it. Yeah. That's what happened to Will Smith. I mean, who cares about, no one cared about J.P. Pinkett Smith, right? No, she was, you know, she was in stuff, but... Because of him.

Because of the Smith name. No, well, no, no, she was, she, she did, she had a few things before, but no, no, she was in stuff, but... Because of him? Because of the Smith name? No, well, no, no, she was... She did... She had a few things before, but no, only she was not like a big star in thing. I don't get these actors. Why do they date famous women? It's insane.

They're garbage lady. A humble woman. And we'll treat you right. Like a god. Okay, once... Thanks. Do it if you're a big one or... Come home with Wonder Bread. I'm gonna say... Oh, no, that's enough pee Do it if it's the right thing. Do it if it's the right thing. Come home with Wonder Bread.

Okay. Oh, no, that's enough pee and poop, I think. I was like, okay. Um, can you do the, the, the pigeon one at the very end? The, the pigeon one. The, the pigeon one. It's the very last one that seems like it's full of typos. I don't think she can't say.

Okay, the coronavirus did Donald Trump admit say. Yeah, yeah. So this is emits a e-show. Yeah, so this is pigeon. It's a language that's like a Gestalt of all, what did we find? So this is nice, you guys are wearing it. Yeah, it was like a mixture of all the Caribbean languages. Have you heard of it?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's kind of dialects and... But it sounds like Matt Cleo. Yeah, so just read it, read it as it appears. You guys always do. Yeah, it's hilarious. It's hilarious, it's hilarious. Yeah, well that's, it's supposed to be hard.

It's the only way, it's the only time we've ever had power over a beautiful woman. That's why we... Donald Trump admits say us, you guys go get worse before you go better. Go better. Go better. Oh good, Trump, wait, do you want this one as a resume? worse before ego better. Go better. Oh, good. Tronvway.

Talk to this one as a resume. I'm coronavirus briefing order. Everybody for America to wear a face mask. He talks a face mask, get work with. He did do. And he shows a them day to day. The president, no wear mask, mask for debriefing as I'm no reason, say, they necessary.

I'm AIDS, don't tell, I'm say, make, use, anoda, eat, yeah, there it is, I know that. I know that. Ask cases of people where they infected, they rise for dealings. Where they infected the infected, they rise for dealers. Where they infected the rise, they.

The Daily White House news conference is stopped for April after Olga Trump talks, say, if they've been injected people with this disinfectant ego with the treat the virus, Olga Trump talks, say, if you know, fit, do social distancing, wear face mask for young Americans, ESA make them no go bar way people to a, Hey, I'm no go bar.

Make them no go bar. Make them no go bar. Okay. So make them no go bar. Make them no go to bar. about people to got got that and avoid any indoor party way people to fall. He say make them say they're safe and smart. Oh, got Trump know like today wear mask in front of Toro Tori people. He claims say some people they wear mask as political statement

against them. Recently, I am Yeah, yeah, I'm out for it against them. Okay. Recently, Tory people take one photo of where mask for the first time as a military hospital. Okay, great. I like how just, yeah, well, a lot of it. Yeah, some words you just, you can't, you know, pigeonize, like military hospital.

Did the military have to do? Where do people go that day, Day, Dem, have hurt? I mean, that's lazy. If they really cared about the customers they're serving, they would put more time into that thing. Make them no go bar. That's what I got out of it. All right, everybody, is there?

I know there's other people in here, but it's just get like three hours. Call in next week, guys. I know, I know, I see. We gotta talk about Grover next week, guys. I know. I know. I see. We got to have, we got to talk about Grover next week, Enigma. Yeah. Because the one you can't compete with the Wonder Brick guy. There's a guy who obsessively makes grovers and has sex with them. What's a Grover?

Like, for some of the Muppet. What's Grover? Grover. No, I know, but I'd the Muppet. I just thought it was like that guy. That guy's Grover. He has sex, I know you but I'd them up it. I just thought it was that guy the that guy's Grover. He has sex with them. Yeah, he makes them a lot. Does he identify as gay or straight? I don't know That's what I want to find out. It's a Grover Yeah Oh, did you once not once to call in? All right, Dijie. What do you what do you want? How's the transition going?

Hey, what's up? It's going great except that you know, I constantly have to deal with dumb shit on the internet and I'm gonna talk about how much of a fucking pussy bitch know is. Oh no. Why would you do that? Do you know is a good boy.

I like no. A good boy in what world? What good has he done for anyone at? Oh, thank you. He's done lots of bad for many people. Oh, what did he, I saw you guys having it out in the chat the other week. No, left the chat, Sean. That's a you mentioned that.

Yeah, because he got bullied by a trans person and he could not take it. I mean, I don't think that's inaccurate to say. I mean, he literally, you're the trans person, you're the trans person immediately afterwards and said like, Oh, like three or four people in Dick's community agreed with Dijie. So I ran with my tail between my legs here to bitch about it. And then when me and Gator talked shit about him, he pinned it to the front. You're errowed. Hold on, say it again. He did what?

He this this man says that he cannot make a thread for himself on his website because it would mean he couldn't stay invested in it because it would hurt his feelings too much. Literally, that's what he said. That's probably honest. He even said like, I know I'm the person who most deserves to have a thread on this website, but I don't have the balls to do that. And yet, when I made a diss track about him, he pins it to the front of the website. So the website itself is a thread about you, Josh. You fucking dumb idiot.

He has this obsession with trying to like own whatever gotcha people, like, you know, like he, somebody Gator, like, did a goofy Photoshop of a picture of him and now he's using it as his discord avatar because he's like trying to get ahead of it and own it. And it's like, the picture's making fun of you, dude, you're using it. You fucking idiot. Like, let me play your, let me play your diss track. I heard about that.

Yeah. Uh, burning down the barns at the Karen Farms. Me and Riley put this together. Okay. Hold on. I'm sorry. Mint did the mint salad. Did the the art open by the way. So if I pitched to that guy, that bread guy, absolute God by the way. He's wonderful. Listen to this. Listen to this. All right. Let's listen to this diss track.

And then I'm going to end the show on that. Yeah. All right. Sick. This is Digi-Nee at night. The video has a bunch of clips from basically, if you want to know why Josh left the discord, why he's not coming on the show. He's your life.

You see why. Okay. Sorry. I played it over. You played it automatically. No problem. This is Riley wearing a Kiwi Farms hoodie. I have that hoodie, it's a fucking man. If you miss that Kiwi Farms sale, you messed up because that is a great hoodie.

I've seen that. Poor Null, they killed his processing and his bank account after he sold all those. So when they kill your bank account, they put all your money in escrow, in case they want to fuck you over. However, in six months. So he got none of the money.

Go ahead. I bet he would love to be in a position where people wanted to help him out right now. Oh boy. Oh boy. They took all of his money. So he didn't get any money, and then he had to do the fulfillment.

And on T-Shirts, it's like, I don't know what he's running at, so he didn't get any money and then he had to do the fulfillment and on t-shirts It's like I don't know what he's running at but he's using my guy, so it's you know it's a lot Yeah, it's not like I know cuz you're not doing shitty stuff like it's a lot to get them made and shipped So he's probably in the whole I don't know 20 Gs on that without getting the money out of Hawk Okay, here it is. Thank you everybody. This is been the Dixho, patreon.com slash the Dixho Dixho. See you next Tuesday.

We'll keep talking to Dixho after this. Here's the diss track that Dixho and Riley made. Burning down, employ the month. Riley, burning down the barns at the caring farms by Visier and the Golden Witch. Here you go. If your life is all about money, status and your own pussy, your empty pathetic person. My end sold I went come on can't talk shit about me. I'm a disaster Libby teen socio path that fake actor yeah smoke left we wax pack and a smacker I got myself a steam beam and detractor making money in America is baby bro

Gotta broke dick and it got a broke brain Should be the kid of block now the island stop no one gives a shit about a foot they post is really not man at the Internet So I'm in stocks and more like that at the Internet capsize it Robin The carin The bars of the carin The bars of the carin

The bars of the carin The bars of the carin' fawns, burnin' down the bonds, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, burnin' down the bonds, the carin' fawns, burnin' down the bonds, the carin' fawns, burnin' down the bonds, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fawns, the carin' fa poking holes in the disposable broke hose jokingly noses shit. Probably won't know where's the least goes down. I think I should slow down. Let the clown figure it out. Someone's nosing a glass house. How are you gonna count on your own friends? These are fully bullshit. When your website spreads lies unverified accounts of cows and docks houses. You're pathetic. Your life is weak, you should end it. You're sight beaten in 2017. Now that's a distant dream. Good luck spreading your jeans when you can't breathe. You're gonna have to mill or dora right from the Philippines.

You can suck my clit though bitch, all six hard inches. You won't get up because you're a bag though, limp dig. So bend it over and beg for mommy. Yeah, I know you're living in her basement. Josh. She is born in the bonds of the care and

born in the bond to the care and born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and

born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and born to the care and here and for burning on the boards of the carol right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right all right It's funny, like, there is this kind of misunderstanding, I think, when it comes to Kiwi Farms. Like there's a lot of people who follow guys like Chris Chan and just document his insanity and don't, but then guys who want to fuck with him, like, no, they're run out of the community pretty much because no one wants that.

They just want to laugh. But then the internet famous people, who are all people like all the e-salebs or whatever, you want to call them, who make a living by acting like assholes on the internet. Right. Exactly. And people hate despise them, right?

Like there are people who just despise, did you yearow for me? For they're probably right, you know, despicable people, what's it somebody, whatever? I don't care. There's those people who come on and only want to hurt. They only want to harm the East celebrities that they're like, essentially lying about or fucking with.

They're all former fans. Yeah, that's the thing. Every single one of them is someone we fucking know. And like, they're not anonymous. You can figure out who they are pretty fucking easily. So it's like, and the funny thing about it is like, when Josh pinned my, he pinned my thread to the front of the board because I made this song,

but like nobody in the thread knows who Josh is. Like the people in my thread are not regular Kiwi Farms users. They're all ex-digy fans who like came there because there's like this idea that posting on Kiwi Farms is a certain cl cloud or mystique because if you talk about it in other places, then that means they're beating you, but there's no one cares about Kiwi.

But it's because of the first guys. It's because of the first guys. They were great at documenting, and they were great at documenting insane people who are all unique and strange, but then the obsessive fans, like the Selena stalker, your most obsessive fans are the ones who will kill you. If you disappoint them in some way,

like it's real, it sucks, it's not everybody, it's very hard to identify them, but if they turn on you in some way, like they will try to fucking kill you. That's a real thing. They're the ones who are kind of co-opting how the site started, but you know, I mean, who cares? It's that, I think that's the.

Well, the main thing that gets to me is that they fuck with business opportunities. And obviously, no, like going out of his way to align himself with PPP, who is going out of his way to fuck with people's business. That is on null. He's the one fucking, and he's letting PPP who is going out of his way. Two fuck with people's business. That is on null. He's the one fucking, and he's letting PPP now use his name. He's going around saying that him and he's like,

oh me and null and Tonkissar, now the Legion of Evil for the fucking whatever community. No, he's letting that happen and inviting. I actually, I thought PPP was joking. Like I think he's doing a bit. I think he's funny, because he did the new- They all think they're doing a bit, like, but what the fuck is the bit that they're legitimately

a pain in the ass and getting you like fucking with our money? That's not a fucking bit, that's how you get killed. You know, if I gotta see- I gotta wait. Yeah, go ahead, go ahead. I'm not worried about the fans who might kill me because I'm the motherfucker who will kill him first, you know?

I dare them to come for me. Some of us are more hung over than others someday. We'll slow on the draw. Yeah, yeah. This is so fucking, this shit's so fucking weird. It is, it is. I can't believe this stuff exists. Yeah, it is.

No matter what, people will find a way to fight. No matter from how, we invent technology so we can fucking fight. Yeah, what do you think about? It's like mean girls, but for men essentially. Well mostly, mostly I started targeting null because I realized how easy he is to bully because I just passed like a random criticism

about him in your discord and he responded immediately with high retard tranny and I was like, well that's so, no fun. No fun went into this at all. I was like, it was easy. So, okay, the theory is though, because obviously, anybody who's a bully, it's because they're insecure about something. In his case, we know what it is.

His dick doesn't work. He said so. He's talked about it. He said, I don't know about that. He's never had good sex just that he's never been able to come from sex. He seems to blame his botched circumcision. I offered to give him my extra force again after, you know, once my dick's gone, but he said he'd be gonna...

You're dick, wait, you're cutting your dick off. Which I, but... You're cutting your dick off? Maybe. Maybe. I don't, last time you were gonna cut your dick off. I don't predict the future. I'm different. I'm different. I should every day.

I can predict that future. I'm never cutting my dick off. Okay, but, you know, he said he didn't want to catch it whenever I had. I said, the house in America and money. And then he started shitting on having money. And that's why we made the Karen farm song because he literally was acting like a Karen and then he fucking ran away.

So, I think this quarantine has made everyone suicidally depressed. Yeah, and saying those personalities are the worst aspects of people's personalities are jumping out. Yeah. You know, my partner, she was straight up told, Josh, like we will let you sleep on our couch if you like just take the L and admit that you're a piece of shit

and stop like doing what you do. You know, like, gray or anybody. You just have to admit that you're a piece of shit and stop like doing what you do. You know, like great. I work with anybody. You just have to admit that you're a fucking asshole and stuff for streaming. That's it. Strip you off all pride and humanity. Oh yeah. That's a do. It's a couch. I think I'm out in trouble. Yeah.

Right. Right. Right. Right. All right. Did you get out of here? We got to go. Nice. Three hours. See you. I see you. Lady, I'm a lady, see you.

You wanna do one voicemail, Sean? Do we wanna start voicemails? One, just one, just one. Okay. Okay. You got Andrew or some? Yeah, I'll do Andrew for you, you know. Cool.

Hey, did you show him given this week's episode of Listen, be to his on, you talk about racism and guns. How could I resist resist you know your boy mm-hmm hearing talk about guns and I think to myself yeah is this like I'll ask me that's me to a fuck it see absolutely what I'm talking about is this I really don't like when people tell other people how to spend the money with guns right if you want to take a $500 Smith and Weston M&P sport and put $4,000 worth of bells and little on it, go for it. That's how fun it is. Your money. That's fun with you. What's your figure? You thought about that? Have you replaced

the trigger? I bet you bought a nice ARP 15. I'm going to guess who builds already a Cuckate compliant weapons. Smith & Wesson. Smith & Wesson, I'm not sure. If you've got a day in those effects, if you've got a nice robber company or even a nice armory. Oh wow! Oh, you spent $4,000 and they are 15.

That's so stupid. Whatever, man, let people spend how they want. That's your rigor. Guys, if anyone's listening, I'm doing a shield for someone who's paying me nothing, check out fucking LaRue. LaRue tactical, attack the fifth guy, there's in the middle of nowhere and they want to wear out.

You think that's fucking triggers. They're not a trigger? They're not a trigger. They're not a trigger to buy for them. All right, thank you, Andrew from the G-Norgan. I got it. They put them on sale. They made way too many and they put them on sale like 1200 bucks for smith and

Wesson really maybe they were 700 they were really cheap dirt cheap and I bought it to cheap not to too cheap not to buy you I mean you can't afford not to buy that that's why I said all right see everybody see I thank you