The Dick Show - Episode 228 - Dick on Gender Neutral Jesus

Episode Date: October 13, 2020

Corporate-speak, law enforcement with "full release", Kian is reverse body shamed, Road Rage: Tampa, John Wick Mario, "The Evil Dead" Dicktation, Manterrupting, debate fly accounts and your ticket to Greenland, the WHO says to end the lockdowns, waiting in line to eat in the street, racist restaurant warnings, screwing Santa, sexism in whiskey, gender-neutral Jesus, a man’s psycho ex hides in his closet, a gun fighter calls in, and the wrong Trump guy calls in; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Well, well, well, well. And you know what I did? I cleaned up a little bit. I mean, very, very minimally. I can tell though. Actually. I can. I cleaned up and that means I threw away all my old papers that you need that you really

know it's on. Probably very important that I have these fucking papers every week. Yeah. See like this one, I have episode 227 advice, read the Civil War letter, which I didn't do, which we had on the fucking top. We have to do that this week, right? Yeah. So maybe I could have a list of things to remember to do. Maybe, and maybe remember not to throw your list away. Well, maybe I need an additional list. Maybe you need a dick leash. That's what I need.

That's what I thought. I can't believe I didn't get instant buy-in from that invention. Well, I don't know. That guy's a genius. Is it mute or is jet bat deaf? No, it's not mute, man. Hey, dick.

Thanks, the audio's working. I love that, dude. I don't know. I've seen that before. Good to see everyone again. Good to see everyone again. Good to see everyone again on this lovely Sunday Sunday Sunday. The 11th. So what we're on now.

As soon as I get that beer, that's when it starts. I've got a bunch of stuff that I need to cover today. But you're going to plant on that until you get the beer. Yeah, I'm going to plant on that. But you're gonna punt on that until you get the beer. Yeah, I'm gonna punt on that. You're gonna punt on that. Do you know, do people talk like that at your place of business? No.

We've got to drill down and punt on this so that we can circle back. It sports talk. It sports speak, right? Yes, thank you, honey. Is that what it is? Well, I mean, I, yeah, I think so. Yeah, it sounds like you're probably,

if you work at a job, you're gonna to put it as opposed to go for it on fourth down. It's like a no, no, no, no, I mean the whole like nonsense, the whole nonsense vocabulary of modern business. No, because I don't work in a big corporation. Well, if you do, I'm sorry for you. If you have to listen to that all day, we got a drilled, we got a circle bar. No, I know. Please advise. Please advise. It's fucking, I'll advise. It's really, in fact, it's my fist up your ass.

How about that? It used to be what people made fun of and now it's how people speak who work in those environments. Yeah. It's really wild. It isn't. Then they take it home. They take it into the bedroom. They say, my dick is hard and you put nothing. It's really wild. It isn't then they take it home. They take it into the bedroom. They say my dick is hard and you

Please advise right is a Advise. Are we going to you know interface or what so are we gonna are we gonna Backchannel are we gonna set up a time to back channel? Yes after the kids go to bed Sub fucking talking like that Scream at them. Sub fucking talking like that. Did you get it for a brainstorming session? Are we gonna hash this out? Right. I can't even do it very well.

I'm trying to think of these references. Me too. Me too. Oh, mm. Mm. I will count myself lucky to have never really worked in a corporate environment. You will count yourself lucky for that.

Yeah. Yeah. You are lucky. Have a little bit of my soul. Oh, I know what happened. Then somebody else yourself lucky for that. Yeah. Yeah. You are lucky. Have a little bit of my soul. Oh, I know what happened. Then somebody else, we turned the fridge on. That's what's making that noise. Oh, see, it wasn't even bothering me this week.

Never mind. I don't know what that noise is. Yeah, it was really obvious to me the other week when it was on, but. Well, that's because I was just making up noises in my fucking head like an insane person. So a good night was had by all I take it. Great night.

Really great. Almost all. Let's go with almost all. Almost all everyone but you. Right. Almost all that a good time. How's that IPA? IPA is fan fucking tastic.

You are looking at a man. You are looking at a 190 man. Sean, let's just say. I do look like you are looking at a 190 man. Sean, let's just, I do look like I'm looking at a 190 man. This is a 190 man. You never thought I could get as skinny as you. You're gonna eat your words. You fat fuck.

I'm eating everything else at the moment. Good. Yeah. Yeah. How welcome to the air. You want to get into it if dip you love to you got it It's a show where if it's a contest gonna you live from out in Bucket even the hardest city of failure I'm your hosting mass in a K the $20 million man

Well it America's worst Mexican a 78 weeks running joining me as always is the world touring LA based comedian Sean the audio engineer good morning dick. What's up, buddy? Thank you for not killing yourself. How do you feel about a live show? I've got to put together a road rage Tampa is chewing at my brains, chewing out the insides of my brains. I'm thinking about it early December, everybody getting everybody back out on the road for a road rage. We're catching the bug.

Everybody's getting together. We're giving each other bugs. It's the give a bug. Give a bug. Take a bug. Cut bacteria. Leave a bug. We're going to human centipede each other. I'm gonna say getting the fucking bug Get the bug get it over with get the bug get it over

We're gonna be like Trump be like Trump get the bug my dad My dad got his a release letter from the casino. He had full release where he yeah for whole full release from the state Yeah, they actually send you because they got for bid We get jacked off by the government. They call you up. I give I work for I pay hundreds of thousands of dollars in my life God forget it got forget God forbid that I get one fucking hand job from the government Yeah, you're telling me what you can't send one cop over to jack me off You send a cop over to fucking kill me. I can't a cop over to, hey, how about a hand job? You know what? No, thank you. I got it covered, but I appreciate the fucking offer. I have seen driving around

North Hollywood a couple of hot female cops like no bullshit. Like where you're like, she's hot, not hot for a female cop. She's hot. Hot. Yeah. Send it doesn't even, doesn't have to be sexist. Doesn't have to be a hot feet doesn't have to be hot, doesn't have to be female. She has to be a representative of the state to come over and do nothing but something good for you. And job for once. But where he's a, where he's at the, the state calls you like if you, if you test positive, you know, they call you and ask you a bunch of questions. I really don't like that. Yeah. Yeah. But it was funny.

He forwarded me up a PDF the other day where it's like, we're pleased to inform you that you have, you know, blah, blah, blah, blah. That's the test. Yeah. You can now resume your full activities, you know, your daily activities. It's like, I got out of the Pokey. My daily activities is being a fucking boss in Mario 35. Oh, man, I don't want to brag.

Put a lot of Mario talk on the show. I am probably the best Mario 30. Mario is like an anniversary in the world. Yeah, probably I'm probably one of the top Mario's in the world in the whole world. Really? You're looking at probably a top easily professional caliber Mario. What makes you say about original Mario? None of this donkey shit, no, this bull shit, OG,

Super Mario brother, Mario brothers. One, the one that is like where you go, if you make a bad jump, you're like, ah, like you're trying to, deadlift. Yeah, I'm trying to, I'm trying to, oh, fuck, ah,

you push the button harder and you hold it, ah, I've broken three controllers already. Just turn them a sunder, oh, turn them, turn them right in half. That's terrible Turn them turn them inside out. I man. I pulled First of all number one after number one number one after number one place in Mario 35

It's an online competitive Mario game. I'm playing everybody. I'm playing everybody in the whole world 35 other people Most of them are Japanese because I play late into the night. So they're all good. They're all woke up early. They got woken up by their tiger moms and forced to play video games. Oh yeah, yeah. So they're trained. They're trained, like the movie soldier,

all of them are children in there. Right. Being trained at Mario. They love Mario like Mario is their Jesus in Japan. I don't know if you know that. It's the same. They have the same religious association with Mario as we do with Jesus Christ in America.

Wow. That's Mario over there. That's how seriously he's taking it. I fucking dominate them. I pulled some John Wick shit in Mario the other day. I jumped, I, I, small jumped, like low scrouched myself. Right. Jumped under a, jumped over a guy, jumped over a piranha plant

at the very apex of the jump. Yeah, under a turtle. Yeah, stood up and fireballed their ass. Bop, bop, bop, back and forth. By like the matrix. I can picture that. That's fucking it. Man, I threw it that was a walkoff. I walked off. It's the crouching jump, right? The crouch. And then the jump. Right. On herd of move. You never, a guy whips that out and you're like, what the fuck, kind of level are you playing on, man? No, do you, the fuck, is this guy been doing?

Do you do the jump on the turtle shell to get like the 100 extra men thing? I don't think you can do that in Mario 35, but I don't waste my time with that kind of shit. Yeah, I get a couple extra men, just a couple in the pocket, and then I'm good. Gotcha. All I'm saying is I'm probably the best, one of the best Mario's in the world. Oh.

And I'm pulling big time, big, I'm pulling big moves online in Mario. Okay. Number two, the thing that I need to talk about. The bonus, bonus dictation we did. Yeah, tremendous. The evil dead. The evil dead. Not evil dead. No, no, who said, tremendous. The evil dead, the evil dead. Not evil dead.

No, no, who said, well, I thought it was the evil dead. I tweeted that on accident and I posted it as evil dead. I always, like, I always hear the second one referred to as evil dead too. I don't know if it's the evil, but I know, bro, there's the evil dead. And there's like remakes.

There's so many fucking, they just can't leave it alone. Yeah, you know, you made the movie, just leave it alone as it is. They just keep redoing the same goddamn thing. Now what is it about the necronomiccom and the tree rapes? What is it about that movie that people like? Nothing, I don't know. Like, yeah, why has it become a cult classic? And I haven't seen the second one,

which, from what I understand, a lot of people like better. It's just the same fucking movie over and over. Is it? Yeah. It's the same thing. It's like dating the same girl over and over again. They're just making the same movie, but we did a great dictation comedy track.

It was fun. Yeah. Yeah, Vito was supposed to be in here to promote it and be on the show with his funny ass, but he said he didn't sleep all night, so. Join the club. Yeah So join the club. Yeah, join the club, man. Um, what else did I have something to do?

Oh, yeah, we got a new shirt up. This? No, not this. Not this shirt. Don't buy this shirt. Dict yourself shirts in your store. It's a kiwi. I'm wearing a kiwi and it says,

Dick, do you sell shirts in your store? Gotcha. Chris, the kiwi, by the way, sending me stuff he's sending to women online again. Oh, really? He's sending them his single- You can't learn anything, or? No, I don't know what's going. He's out to lunch right now. He's sending them right now. He's not to lunch right now. Ever since his court case got finished. So is he like free to travel? Oh, God, I hope not. To Globe Trot. I don't even know what his court case was about, but I assume harassment, criminal harassment,

or what I thought it was about. That's what I thought it was about. Women and fucks with them. Okay. It's, yeah, this is working. It's working, right? Yeah, it's working. He's been sending me his, his chats with women where he sends them his cement analysis and

asks if they want him to get him to get them pregnant. Is that what he leads with? Yeah. Hi, my name's Chris. How would you like to get knocked up with some of my swimmers? Like that. Yeah, that sounds like something you would say.

Yeah, it does. I don't think it's work for him. Let's see what we got. I'm guessing not. What we got this week? Man, corruption, that's a thing. I guess that's the UN's latest. The UN is like, they're having like,

Passover for cuts, last couple of weeks, like every day, they have like an advent calendar of here's how we're gonna be a huge cont today. Oh, man toruption. That's what, like, man's planning. So, man toruption. Now they got man toruption. Okay, I know what this is, I think,

and I'm totally guilty of it because I need to get to the information before I fucking die. Are we sure? I have to get to the fucking pertinent information. I don't need to know the shape of the ice cubes and the fucking drink. I just don't.

You've probably needed to say in your life about maybe five or six things. Hey, watch out for that car, you know? Yeah. But generally speaking, that counts as the five or six things. That was it. That was the only thing you needed to say in life. All the words that you learned were totally pointless and useless and have only been a detriment to everyone in your life around you. Yeah. Now we're going to pretend, now we're going to pretend that this, that this plague of man corrupting is somehow not the fault of the gender

that talks endlessly, that is, that rights that texts you while they're talking to you because they have more to say that they can't get out because they're talking to fucking much. I have literally said, I got it. Stop texting. I'm talking. I have said that.

Stop texting. Stop. I can't go back and read the fucking 10 prior paragraphs to remember what the fuck I'm supposed to get. I got it. Yeah. I got it. Please for the love of God.

God. Please put it in one. Think about it. Yeah, I got it. Please for the love of God. Oh God. Please put it in one. Think about it Put it in one text. I need it all in one text. I don't want. Oh, yeah, and also and then something about something else and oh Yeah, oh and maybe if you I can't do it. You ever have this one? Yes or no I can't do it. You ever have this one? Yes or no? Manter option. Fuck the UN. Fuck them right up their ass. Get on go go fix circumcising and then come back. Come back when you've done that. I Jack when you've stopped Babies from getting their dicks cut off. I honestly believe it is just a difference in our in our genders. I

Think it mean. I know I just think it's our brains just work differently. I thought you're gonna say our brains just work. You heard what you wanted. They're just, they're just different. Yes, it's, it's like, it's a common complaint. Your own interrupting me. You are never giving me the information. I need you to never stop talking.

It's as old as time. The who? He was so annoying. So annoying that Kamala Harris. Would you let me finish? Let me get it. R Uspro did it too. Can a fish?

Can everyone make fun of him? Yeah, man. I'm in it. Dana Carter. Of course. Yeah. What's you? I am. I am.

I thought she was going to Z snap. Oh, no. Oh, that would have been awesome. Oh, yeah, what am. Yeah. Uh, that's her power. Yes. Slade queen.

If I, uh, the time when the fly landed on Pence, yeah, I just started seeing that debate, but I heard the, yeah, the fly landing on them. And I saw all the Twitter accounts being, fly, I penned five times, I really wanted to kill my, I almost did. Almost as I said, I'm done. I can't take, I just can't take this anymore. You know, I'm just rowing up.

Does that come with a lime? Oh, there's a fly on the head. There's a fly on a guy's head. Ah! God. Every time I'm flying. Oh, there's a fly on his head. I'm flying on a guy's head. Ah. God. Every time I hear stuff like this, I'm like, yeah, I'm not missing anything. I just, no, no Twitter.

No Twitter. David, David Bonzer-Bons, from the who appealed to world leaders yesterday, telling them to stop using lockdowns as your primary control method. He claimed that the only thing lockdowns achieved was poverty. Who, the first...

Dr. Bonzo from the who. From the who. The band, yeah. The band's what I thought. Lockdowns have one consequence and that you must never, ever belittle and that is making poor people an awful lot poorer. The only time we believe a lockdown is justified

is to buy you time to reorganize, regroup, rebalance your resources, protect your health workers who are exhausted, but by and large, we'd rather not do it, couldn't say it, he couldn't stick to his guns. Yeah, I know, I know. Doesn't fucking work. Look at what happened. Also, we appeal to all world leaders, stop using lockdowns as your primary control method. Oh, really!

So it's, Oh, really. So it's, oh, really. But nobody else is saying that. About the whole. No, that's not like, that's, the who is the world health organization. This is a doctor. Oh, I know.

What the who? I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. What do I mean, look at how many other doctors oppose that?

What, what, this is a pretty good source. Well, no, I know. I know. How many other, how many other, how many other doctors opposed that? What, what, this is a pretty good source. Well, no, I'm not. How many other experts on the who would say a different, you know, really important point by a professor goop to another guy said, another that has 12,000 signatures, 12,000 signatures. I assume those are doctors. It doesn't say though, could just be random Twitter accounts.

Well, hopefully not. I'm just gonna go, I doesn't say though, could just be random Twitter accounts. Well, hopefully not. I'm just gonna go, I've got two toilets in this house. One is for shameful shitting. Oh, when I've embarrassed myself. Okay. And I need to go think about my life. And then another toilet where I'm triumphant. Oh, and I have made a lot of good predictions.

Which one is which? I'm not gonna tell you which one is which. But that's for me to know. Okay. That's a private thing for me to know. No, no. Well, when you see me shit after reading this and stop doing lockdowns. Stop doing them I will be shitting on the trium on the toilet of triumph. Okay. Just so you know, okay I might save it though for when you're gone. So you don't see which one it is

Yeah, right. Here's something funny. Keon. Yeah,, Keon, very muscular, very large, very sexy man. Yeah. Beautiful. He had a photo of his deleted by Bumble. Yeah. I think it was Bumble because it was body shaming because he was so good looking in the photo. It was like a shirtlet, like he's, dude, looks ripped.

You know, he looks like he's got giant shoulders and some traps going on. He's one of those guys, like I've seen him out of shape and then as soon as he gives a fuck, he's one of those guys who like picks up a weedies box and gets into shape, you know, like it's, yeah, yeah. So it's a, it's a deleted one. They deleted one of his pictures.

I saw the picture. It just looks like a shirtless, like it looks like he's trying to flex to look sexy. Yeah, ladies, you know, like ladies. But isn't that kind of like, you know, if you think that would work, shouldn't you be doing that? I don't, I cannot imagine who is body shamed by a sexy man posting a shirtless picture of himself on a dating app?

Is it other men? I mean, in a dating app world where every, where every chick rocking a muffin top has you have to be six foot six or or over to ride this ride. To ride this fucking jolapie in this world. You're a guy posting a shirtless picture of himself, is body shaming to whom? Other men? That's all I can, that's what I think.

Women, women existing is body shaming to, is shaming to existence itself. And you're gonna tell me that a guy taking a picture in a mirror is somehow an aggressive act? Fuck you. What is this app for? They're trying to handicap the field. Well, that's what's going on in life right now. It really is.

It is Harrison Burjeron, 10,000%. We are getting the full life. It's like some sort, not everybody, not everybody is gonna be good at everything, not everybody can do everything. Some people have attributes, other people don't have. The fuck. You can't, the fit and the gifted and the strong have been handicapped by the week at

just a turning point where we're now, we can't even, we cannot even fuck anymore without being dragged down by feminists and needs into this into a quagmite into a still born quagmire of inactivity, of nothing, of nihilism and boredom. It's fucking sucks. If you want to go out, if you want that chick, you have to have, you have to get through like 10 obese people with cystic acne before you have a shot. If she's a, and that's the act of word, people, not even women.

If she says no to those 10, then you can, then you can take your shot in there. You've got to throw the, yeah, it's, it's otherwise, it's transphobic. If you have any kind of preference, you've got to knock through them. All right, well, can I at least post a picture of myself looking good? Oh no, I'm afraid you can't do that. So that's offensive. That's the whole story.

He got that taken down. It's literally, there's, that's it. Yeah. I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? You got your muscles, got deplatformed by a dating app. What the fuck are they dating then? Just I'm sorry.

You're mine. It's a genetic condition where I inherit two copies of this one gene that just make like I express muscle, you know, like it's just, I'm sorry. It's a disability. I have a child disabled. I'm so fucking big. I try to gain weight.

I try to gain weight. I try to gain weight. I try to just, I don't do anything. I use a scooter to get around, so I don't build up my leg muscles. Yeah. I don't rascal. I don't do anything.

I try not even to chew hard, so I don't get to define jawline. I liquefy all my food. I'm trying to make myself as unattractive as possible, but these damn genetics. They just keep fucking me over. Yeah. It's my genes.

And now you're discriminating. It's my supremacist jeans. They're doing this to me. Are discriminating against me. Yeah, imagine that. That's a person and you don't even know, we're gonna know why I identify. You can need to put a, you need to cover up, sir.

If you're gonna do it on our dating app, you need to put a burka on. It's the same, this world is completely fucked. It's gone insane. It's all gone insane. Everything, everybody, everything, every the way, this world is completely fucked. It's gone insane. It's all gone insane. Everything, everybody, everything, every way, everything's insane. What's the point?

What is the point of working out? You can't go out. For your own. Even though the fucking who says you should be able to out. For your own, have you, where I work in North Hollywood, it's fucking crazy. You know what? Is it?

You know what it looks like? What? Where everything looks like, and it's like this. You know what? Is it? You know what it looks like? What? Where everything looks like, and it's like this, well, probably downtown too, but it's like this everywhere that places are open. It looks, it reminds me of Europe, all the sidewalk cafes. That's where everybody is. Oh, God.

And they're crammed in there. Everybody is crammed in everywhere. We went, it looks like it reminds me, it almost reminds me of like the South of France, all those like a couple blocks back from the beach just for miles. It reminds me of a carage sale. It's just like a bunch of garbage out in the street. We went out two nights ago and stood like assholes out in the street waiting to get a table over out in Pasadena.

It's so packed. I don't know why, I don't know why the entire street is in full of tables. Just send out the cops, fill up the military vehicles with picnic tables, send them out on the street, and you know what? Actually, make them start taking orders because you guys fucked us over. You fucked over every single business out here.

You got guys, I know you got guys that aren't stopping crimes. So send them out to take some fucking orders. And give me a fucking drink officer. Hands up. Hands up. Hands up. Hands up. Hands up.

Like you said, I saw the New York police posted a, the New York police posted a weed bust that they had after how many month weeks of not stopping land sacking peaceful protest, that ransacking peaceful protesters in the street killing it beating the hell out of each other. We stop the fucking weed. It's not even illegal in most of the country. Shit heads. Stop tweeting about it.

God damn, I pissed off today. Every time I hear about a weed bust, it's like, oh, like they busted Sesame Street. You know, it's like, it's weed is Sesame Street. Like, it's like, give me a break. No one respect the cops, hey, check it out. We just busted all this fucking weed.

Are you guys insane? Even boomers are a bus cue. 60, 70, 75 year old people are like, oh, weed's not a, give me a point. What are you dealing with weed for? Give me the arc of the covenant. So I can find the person who tweeted that, open it up, show it into their brain,

and have it like a fucking, like a cancer, go back through everybody responsible for that fucking tweet. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All the way back into, all the way back to Genghis Khan. Yeah. All the way back through your fucking timeline. You're telling me fuck you. Genghis Khan, enormous pot head.

What did he probably didn't do any drugs? A lot of people don't know that. Well, just rape, he got off on. I would guess murders. Well, I don't know. Over there, isn't that where kind of, you know, over in East Asia and stuff, a opium and things like that. I would guess that's one of the oldest.

That was the first drug laws too. Opium. Is that right? Guys would go over here. Yeah, guys would go. What do we have? You know, we, you know, we, you know, we, you know, we, you know, we, you know, we, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like,

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like

like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, sure. It's so racist. So Yelp rolled out a wonderful new tool to find the most based restaurants around you, I guess, is there? The most based. Based. Based. Explain that. Based means saying racist things. Really?

Yeah. You say that's based. Why? No, it doesn't mean that. It's just an internet slang word. For, for like saying true things. Oh, that are not, that are not acceptable. Not acceptable.

Not palatable by large. Base. Yeah, like your base. Short for some LA based. Yeah, no, but I mean like a race based or like. No, it has nothing to do with race. All right, well, just a slang word. It's one of those things.

Cool. Oh, okay. All right. Well, it's just a slanted one. Those things are like cool. Oh, okay. All right. People will say it. All right. If you say like no e-girls ever, people say based. Go ahead. Just wait people talking. Oh, okay.

Yelp rolled out a tool for finding the most based restaurant around you. Did you see that? No. No. You think about that? Yeah. You can, it's like a speed. You can report businesses for racist, any racist activities that happened that the business did onto you. Yeah, tell on your neighbor, tell on the, yeah.

I can't imagine a competitor, you know, I can't fucking imagine this being used. I can't even imagine this being used correctly one time. No, I know, you know. But I can't imagine it being used fraudulently all the time. Like it's at a point where I have trouble even picturing what actual racism looks like anymore other than the massive drug prohibition, which is all fucking racist. I have trouble picturing legitimately what racism would look like because it's everything because it's everything because it's fucking everything and every you will read God you will read people seeing

racism obviously everywhere where it's not all we didn't get served at all they passed us over to all the server they gave me the wrong I read somebody say the server giving them the wrong food was because there were a racist. It is fucking insane. It is becoming currency. It's become a currency that is increasing in value at the rate of Bitcoin. Yeah, it's like that's what you think. I mean, I can't say that it's not true.

Most likely they just fucked up. I mean, yeah, you can't, you should. No, it's at the point where you say you know what? If you can't prove it, fuck you. If you can't prove it, go fuck yourself. It's not fucking true. That is the 50-50, well, you know, could be. I wouldn't put that in 50-50.

But people might, oh no, no, no. If you give them a choice. Well, some people, some people wait it the wrong way. Some people wait it like 20. 20, or at least once I gotta be. I know, that's probably true. Probably true. That people wait it like 20 or at least what it's gonna be. No, that's probably true. That's why that one thing pissed me off so much. Like, well, we only recommend it.

Don't fucking say when you only recommend it. We say no, these people cannot keep track of these multiple things. It takes a lot more for me to say, to write somebody off immediately. Like, as it's saying, know, we've talked about this before, like people, you're not the same guy. You were at like 17 when you're making stupid tweets at like 30, you're probably embarrassed by a lot of the shit you said, you know, or

thought or thought you knew. And it's like, so really, so they're forever there, that guy, you know, so it's like, yeah, it's just a bunch of fucking words, you said. Yeah, no, you know, so it's like, what is even that guy? It's just a bunch of fucking words, you say. Yeah, no, I know. Nothing, I know, I know. It's nothing, I know. Say I'm all the time. And then, and then, and then, and then. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But people who say that all the time, they might be racist. They might be, can't be funny. No, everyone's racist. Everybody is like naturally, I don't know if you call it racist or you know, you're you're afraid of something different, like it's inherent, right? It's, it's, I mean, you're attracted to women, right? That's racist. I'm just a hit. I mean, dogs are racist.

How come they don't ever get canceled? Yeah. Right? Oh, you barked at the bark at the black dude. Well, some kind of dude, I don't, I can't tell. They're right? Oh, you've barked at the black dude. Well, some kind of dude, I can't tell. They're, you know, I can't ever tell who they're barking at because I don't see color, obviously. I know, I've seen dogs, some dogs just go fucking apes shit over some types of people who are slightly taller than normal on average.

Yeah. Then I'm used to. I know. I have more musculature than I'm used to seeing. Yeah, some of them don't give a fuck and others just go apeshit. So there is, there will be a point where women are just going to walk around apologizing for their racist dogs. That's coming. Now that we're resurrecting kids, well, they're also a pro-prank.

Aren't they, all these adopted pit bulls that's complete cultural appropriation? Exactly. I don't know what you're talking about, but that's true. Honey, can I have another IPA, please? Thank you. No, you're feeling it. Now I'm feeling it. So you can go, you can go report a business,

a small business, because what we need right now, what the small business community needs. Yeah. Is a scarlet letter to hang out, is what they need is to defend themselves constantly against your imagination. Yeah. Which isn't hard enough.

It's not hard enough. Things aren't bad enough. The, you know, the small business economy is booming. What we really need to do is rein in these small businesses because they're starting to take over the likes of fudruckers, butt fuckers, denys, we're there. It's become butt fuckers. I officially believe we're that dumb.

Oh, yeah. I think we're there. Except it's just not racist. I mean, I wish it was butt fuckers. I wish that idioticity had beaten Demolition man as far as just Hopi's go. Yeah, but it didn't. Yeah. Demolition man one because we don't have the cool, we don't have the cool future stuff.

Well, because there's morality statutes, everyone's clean and doesn't fuck ever. You can report businesses for being racist. Anything the racist happen and then they will put a badge on your business. Can you fucking believe that? Wait, wait, wait, wait. It's on, it helps. Yeah, they'll put a badge on your fucking business.

How was anybody fucking substantiating this stuff? This is, bro, this is horrible. Yelp to alert users if If a business has been accused accused of races, which is, which means guilty. And accusations all you need, you know, there's no one ring in that bell. I just can't, I don't, I mean, every day they found find ways to make me hate the internet more and more. And I run that story. I'm always waiting for the other to see, I'm always looking for who I think it is.

How could this be any good at all? No, I know, I'm always looking for some kind of rational, yeah, out, looking for out. Yeah, and it's not a gun. It's not, yeah, and it's not that. The Alps has created a new label to warn users about businesses accused of racism following an uptick in reports of discrimination.

The review platform says the alert will help consumers decide whether they'll be welcome at a particular business. Yes. Hahaha. I fucking swear to God. I swear to God. That's crazy, man.

That's turned our back on capitalism. That's one of the most, in a way that is unprecedented and is disgusting and is anti-human to me. And we're, they're just giving us tools to teach us to do this. And we're just doing it to each other. Yeah. That is, we're doing it to each other for the, for the elements of these technocratic overlords that are cryptographically enforcing us to hate each other. That's one of the most depressing things

I've heard in a while. No, it really is, I know. It really is. Like you just put that, it's crazy. Because no, no, no, you can be welcome at this business because of your race. No, it's not necessary.

Because of your race, like do you guys understand how, I mean, do you understand how hard it is to hire people that don't steal from you? Like, do you really fucking understand that? Just, I mean, literally taking money out of, taking food out of your kids' mouths. That's where we're talking about being racist.

What in the fuck are you talking about? Just give me a, just give me a, just, just give me a drink and jerk me off. That's it. Why is that so fucking hard? I just need to see some like some empirical evidence. You know, it's like, if you're gonna call somebody racist or, you know, a discriminator,

I'm gonna need to see something else. You just say it like, I mean, even like the, the, I remember when Kramer melted down. And then, and then, I mean, even like the, the, I remember when Kramer melted down and in and in and in and it's like, yeah, you're just saying that to her feelings. You got racist. This is not racist because it's saying mean things. I heard the guys feeling. If you want to hurt somebody's feelings, that's where you would go. Yeah. Like you're like, you're getting a bit argument with a woman, oh, you fucking horror. Like, you don't think she's actually a whore.

The review platform says the alert will help consumers is, yeah, whether they'll be, oh, whether they'll be welcome at a particular business, but it's already receiving criticism by people who claim it will be used to destroy merchants with fake, fake, fake, fake, fake, fake, fake, fake and reviews and shitter on the, I mean, even if it's not fake, it's fucked. No, completely, but you also, it's going to be fake.

Yeah. People do that shit all the time, all the reviews. It's, yeah. If a guy walks in with a anybody wasting around swastika in your face, like that's not the business didn't pay for that. Yeah. We've completely forgotten. We've completely lost the role of money, government, this disavowship has grown into a monster.

A Frankenstein's monster that needs to be put down. All of it. Do you disavow? Do you just, the constant, I played a nine minute compilation of Trump disavowing. No. My supremacist. Yes, he sent it to me yesterday. I'm not going to play it because I mean, I know. No, I know. No, it'savowing. No. My supremacist. Yes, he sent it to me yesterday. I'm not going to play it because I mean, I know.

No, I know. No, it's been. Yeah. Haunston. Yeah, I just about. Yeah, yeah, of course. He absolutely has. Y'all says it will place the notice on the profiles of businesses that see an influx of

reviews after getting public attention for reports of racist conduct. What would that be? Like they don't have orange drink. Do you guys have orange drink here? Just about. Just about. And direct, what the hell is racist conduct? Like really? What is it? It's a, I need you to, I need someone to show me what it is.

I'm done buying into it. I don't just saying, oh well it exists, but it's tough as, fucking show me what it is. Well, but it's something that is, it doesn't have defined borders. Well, don't believe it then. It's, you know, it's, yeah, I don't know that anybody could give you a, they could tell you extreme forms. That's, that's stuff's easy, but it's like, where does it end? It's, it creeps. It kind of ebbs and flows. It's all the economy. It's all money. All racism is money. All It's all the economy. It's all money.

All racism is money. All of it is about money. It's intertwined in that. It's intertwined in that. It has always been about money. It always will be. And the people who do this shit fucking know that it is.

They know it's all about money. It's always the poorest people competing for the same fucking handouts, competing for the same fucking jobs that, competing for the same fucking jobs that creates this stupid team'smanship that's built into the human DNA. Here's something funny. The boy, my nephew's figured out that they can fuck over Santa.

So there, one of their birthdays is coming up. They can fuck over Santa. They hatched a plan to fuck over Santa. The two of them. Great. So one of their birthdays is coming up and he's showing me in this catalog of all these dumb kids toys. Is BamBam more the Schemer?

No, no. Realism is the Schemer. See, I always thought. That means nice. He's nice kid. No, he is, but I thought because I watched him try to get more video game time by saying that I wanted to play. Oh, I need this because Sean wants to play. Now he met me about an hour before that. Yeah, he's not a good

skimmer because that's obviously lie. Yeah. The other one would come up with a convincing lie. Gotcha. Okay. And he can't, he hatched this plan. He's showing me what he's getting in first birthday. He's like circled all this dumb stuff in this catalog. I'm like, it's all educational shit too. So I'm going through a ripping out. Like, why are you getting all this educational stuff? Where's the toys? And you know, my sister's getting pissed off. And he goes, well, I came up with this idea that I'm going to get the cheap stuff.

Everything I've got that I want is under 20 bucks, is under 50 bucks. I was like, oh yeah. Why are you bragging about that? What do you mean? What do you mean? What do you give me that extra to homeless? Do you even know about homeless people? Why are you telling me that it's weird that you're telling me this?

And it goes, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm doing it. And then when Christmas comes around, I'm gonna go for the big dollar stuff cause that's on Santa. Mm. That's okay. So you're saving mom and dad some stuff for your birthday by getting the cheap stuff.

Right. But then when Christmas comes around, you're gonna stick it to Santa. Stick it to Santa. Yeah, he can. There you go. All right. Can't disappoint Santa. Can can. There you go. All right. Can't disappoint Santa.

Can't disappoint. It's fucking amazing. He's pretty good. He's fucking over Santa. Yeah. Guy just gives you free stuff for no reason. You don't even have to be good. You just have to like say that you're good.

Right. Immediately fucking him over. Mm-hmm. I'm gonna stick Santa with that fat. Stick Santa before he sticks you. I'm gonna get mom and dad are just gonna give me the chief step Oh man, I'm gonna give mom and dad a break. They do buddy. You are a lot for me. Get your wallet out Santa fat mother fucker

That was great. It's good. I laughed all night Yeah, that's it's Funny and then I immediately went and beat Mario 35 right in front of them. Oh, damn. That was, it was great. You flexed on them. Yeah.

Uh, sex, sexism in whiskey. Every year since 2003, whiskey writer and critic Jim Murray releases his self-published annual whiskey Bible. And his top choices for the 2021 edition have just been announced as usual. Blah blah blah. However, let's see, let me just find the meat of this, at least in the whiskey world.

Here comes women, front and center. Yeah, here comes women. See, every time people allow women to get into things, like drinking beer, or drinking drinking whiskey or smoking cigars Whenever I see simps and orbiters go like oh, it's really cool that you're a woman and that you're smoking cigars I think that is it that is like a fucking that's an orbiter thing to say huh you do not know Just what you're meddling with I feel like I feel like Jeff Goldblum in Jurassic Park don't don't don't Don't have your don't have your wife or girlfriend take up golf

or whatever hobby you do by yourself. Don't take your other shooting range. Let me see, this winner, I can't find the meat of this. Over the top, Murray's Bible's main problem is its sexist language. It employs to describe whiskies. And many brands are ignoring this problem. Like smokey or, you know, to describe the whiskies.

Yeah. Oh, it's pain. I can't find any actual quotes. Yeah, what a surprise. It's just a bunch of garbage. Sexism in the whiskey, Bible. I have had, I have I had, have I had this much fun with a sexy 41 year old Canadian before?

Well, yes, I have, but it was a few years back now and it wasn't a whiskey. I swear to God. I swear to God. How do we know that we're talking about a man? Women, good point. Women don't want us to get laid ever again, and they don't want to get laid themselves This is a it is a war on sex. They're just a Roger sonar G spots the fourth generational civil war is a sexual one

And it's been it's been happening and it's been building up for 30 fucking years We're right in the middle of it our dicks are bone dry 30 fucking years, we're right in the middle of it. Our dicks are bone dry, plus these are unfucked, and we have got to change it. That's my plaid talk. Thank you for coming to my plaid talk. He's talking about G spots, so I guess. Yeah.

Simply seduces was the fun we had better, probably not. It is hard to imagine what could be, is this whiskey simply seduces you with the lightness and knowledgeable meaning of its touch. Butterfly kissing your taste buds, finding time after time, your whiskey, arogynous zones, or G spots. It could be a woman then.

Men have G spots. Yeah. I think so. I don't know, I read that in a Jack Black interview. I assume he had done his research. Maybe. And then surrendering itself. But look, they're tender and total submission.

And that's it right there. It's called knowing his audience too. Like the fucking, what do you, the grocery store fucking novels or what do you call, Harlequin or Harlequin novels? Yeah, Harlequin romance novels. Yeah, whatever. I mean, that's, that's for a different audience. That's it. The total submission part, these chicks just, they can't do it. They can't fuck the thought of not being in control for even a moment, fucking terrifies them because they have had to be their entire lives to thread the needle of the current of our current economy. It's crazy how the girl in school that goes

to every after school club packs her dance card so fucking full that she literally needs a time machine. I'm talking about Harry Potter to get through her basic schooling is now in charge of the mouthpiece of our culture. Vizavie, these stupid think pieces that they could pay nothing for. Yeah. Sick.

What were you saying? Nothing. Nothing. It's all were you gonna say? Nothing. Nothing. It's all depressing. If whiskey could be sexed, this would be a woman. Every time I encounter, I mean, it seems like a joke. Marangie artist, glimmerangie is a, that fucking artist and gas glimmerangie is very good.

It pops up with a new look, a different perfume and mood. It appears not to be, this is a little high brow. I think I could review whiskey. Talk about it would be Glen Marangie. Oh man, huge, huge tits. Right. Whoo, man, big ol' fucking boh, boom. Like that.

Huge tits. Huge fucking cans. All right. Oh, God. I'm trying to get, yeah. I'm trying to get you something not depressing, Sean. Um, no, it's just, when you do these, when you do these, it's just like, yeah, I know, I know. The proud boys, but here's another, you know, here's another actual example of what I know is

going on all the time. I'll be honest, I really my favorite part of my favorite way to do the show is to just talk about this bullshit with you every week. Yeah, fucking is. It's just so fucking aggravating. It's crazy. Watching it all week. Did you see the proud boys were epically owned on their hashtag? All of a bunch of woke left idiots decided to post pictures of men kissing using the hashtag proud boys.

As if the proud boys used their own fucking organization and a hashtag to themselves. Oh, so they were putting it up as if that we're taking it over. We're taking it back. We're taking it over. How can you be bullied? You know, how can you be bullied your entire life and still not understand how it works? That's what I want to know. Right. Pictures of men kissing. By the way, don't think proud boys would care because Gavin McKinnis and Milo literally

kissed to made out for at a press conference for I don't even fucking know the reason because they're gay. That's why because they just wanted to fucking kiss and everybody's insane about homophobia, about their repress, about their repressed homosexuality. That's why they wanted to do it. They just wanted to let it fucking out because they had an excuse to do it. Epicly trolled by, I think George decay and a bunch of other crazy idiots, but my thinking is, how is this any different than just calling them gay?

Like just call them F-slurs. Like that's what you're doing. You take over their hashtag and just post a bunch of men kissing. Yeah. Aren't you just saying like, you're gay? Right. And that's a slam, right? Yeah, like you're just saying that's a bad thing. They didn't do anything by the way. You're just calling them gay because you don't, like you're just you're saying that's a bad thing. They didn't do anything by the way.

You're just calling them gay because you don't like I understand. Yeah, that I was I was 13 before. Yeah, you know, I mean, I still do it. Not on the air obviously. Yeah, but yeah, yeah. You're just saying, how is it not just saying a Efsler? Proud boys are Efslers. I know.

No, I'm fucking we're gonna post a bunch of men kissing. Yeah. boys are Eftlers. I know. That's the sound. No, I'm fucking thin. We're gonna post a bunch of men kissing. Yeah. And that'll really, it's my first vlog. I don't care, but secondly, how is it, how you show men, how, why is men kissing an insult?

Right. What the hell are you talking about? That's right. Um, why is it different? Why do you guys, why do we, why do we have to tolerate you? Why do we have to tolerate this method of thinking in all forms?

I wish it was, I wish life was just like a house and you're inside and the kids are fucking misbehaving or whatever and you fucking, you go outside but you've got the sliding glass door open and the screen and then they start getting into more kids shit and they're fighting and fussing and saying stupid shit that doesn't have any truck runs them all. And then no, that's what I then you just shut the sliding door, lock it and just close the fucking drapes and whatever the fuck they do out there, that's fucking fine because it doesn't affect me. Yeah, it would be great. It would be

you're both you're all stupid. nothing that you say makes any sense No, doesn't Let's see. I've got a gender neutral Santa. They rolled that out. What the fuck does that look like? Apple rolling out gender neutral Santa Claus out gender neutral Santa Claus. Let me pull this up on the feed, make sure everybody can see this thing. Oops, oops, oops, oops, oops. No, don't do anything. John, what do you think about that gender neutral Santa Claus? So one of those, are they all three supposed to be Santa Claus? No, that's a man in an address. Okay. So we got gender neutral Santa Claus.

I can't believe it. I don't know why that's not just anyone else in a Santa hat. What else about that makes me think Santa Claus in any way? Yes, not Santa. Because he doesn't have a... He doesn't have a dance as a guy because he doesn't have a gender. He's an older fat man white guy. Like a guy, a man existing as a threat to your fucking identity. Why is it's not?

Santa Claus is not about you and your lesbian partner pretending to give your kids like a weird version of Christmas. It's just a, it's a fucking coke ad. It's not a gender neutral coke ad. It's just a fucking coke ad. Everyone, what the hell in an apparent confusion of their digital diversity campaign Apple debuted the new Santa emoji with the blah, blah, blah.

The non-binary St. Nick is part of a batch approved by the idiot consortium, many of which aim to make online discourse more inclusive. You're gonna change the question. I mean, Nick is generally like a, I mean, I was short for Nick Lisbon, but Nick it should be a different name, should Nick? Well, there ever be a gender neutral Jesus Christ

in our lifetime. I mean, I, good question. That, I am, I think that will happen. I, yeah, well, that's a line that is, you're gonna get more backlash. Good question. I think that will happen. Yeah. Well, that's a line that is, you're going to get more backlash. People are going to feel a little more strongly about it than Santa. Where are you going to go? You're going to go to a mosque.

You've only got one spot for God. We got you by the balls, guys. Jesus, maybe was a woman. How about that? I would like nothing more than to see a gender neutral Jesus. Can't wait to see it. I can't I mean I hope Apple rolls that out just in time for Christmas. Whatever the whatever cut Pope comes next. That would be awesome. It's gonna be who the Pope who comes out strong against Trump. Whatever. ever. Um, you know what else makes me a rage this week? The, uh, the only fans.

There's a lot of hate for only fans. Yeah. Like these chicks post that they got their own place or whatever. Because then everyone shits on them. Like, oh, you fucking whore. And I don't like, I want to ask these people. Do you, because they don't want to pay welfare? Like, what are you, what are you talking about?

This is why would you shit on this? It's they would just get it some perfect system. They would just like marry or get with somebody who would just pay their shit anyway. Now they can get people to pay their shit and not have to be with them. Yeah, right. I mean, I guess.

That's the saying, I don't get it at all. They're gonna get money one way or another. You women, you think? Yeah, I mean, that's saying women are gonna get money one way or the other. Yeah, I just don't get the hatred of it. It just seems like such insane jealousy. I don't know.

It does seem like they hate it because that woman should be serving a man if I'm being honest. I don't understand any more who hates it. The deep instinct like, oh, that's fucked. Guys hate it. There's more hate from guys or girls. Both. Yeah, well, I know. But then I think women are maybe pretending to appeal to guys. Like women do that with politics all the time.

They see guys hating something. They're like, oh, guys, I fucking, I hate that too. Look at me. Mr. Misex. Can you help me with my golf game? That was one of the funniest things I've ever heard. I want you to take two strokes off my golf game? That was one of the funniest things I've ever heard. I want you to take two strokes off my golf game.

Yeah, fucking God. Yeah. Just grenades. Because that's basically what would happen. Hey, dick, I just listened to episode 204. This is from Ducin, where you gave some really good advice about relationships. A guy who rode in about his feminist upbringing raised by his mom

as a guy. I was raised in much the same way, so I related a lot. My parents never divorced, but my dad always prioritized work. So during my early teenage years, he moved to a neighboring country to start a business. As a result, I only got to see him a few times a month. I love both of them dearly.

And I know my mom tried her best, but it was only a few years ago that I figured out how fucked up and damaging it is, not to have a male perspective while growing up. Women really like putting other women onto a pedestal with their suffering. They really like saying the boys just don't understand things like girls do and that girls are better

at almost everything. That they're always more mature, et cetera. They really, man, they really fucking do. I remember that shit pumped in constantly when I was a kid and like, oh, girls mature faster than boys. Girls mature faster than boys. Girls mature faster than boys. Yeah, I'd heard that. Shut the fuck up.

Yeah. They hit you with it when you're a kid too. I do remember hearing that. You do. Yeah, not in my house, but just like at large. I got to remember being a little boy and hearing that shit all the time and then just kind of thinking like, oh, I guess I'm just dog shit then.

Like, huh? Just having a feeling like, whatever. I remember just going like, fuck you. I was like, oh, just having a feeling like, whatever. I'm just gonna like fuck you. I was like, why? Oh, that's weird. Like the weird thing. I didn't like dwell on it, but yeah. I know, I do remember here.

Now that I'm thinking that I remember it, now that I remember having that memory, I'm fucking pissed off about it. Well, the fact that you remember it had obviously left an impression. Women also like to teach kids that life is like a Hollywood movie. That one day someone will come along and you'll both awkwardly stare at each other's shoes

or something. Fall in love because you're that awkward guy that's really nice. Yeah, you're not Keon. You're not a big muscled up stud with shoulders that look like bowling balls. Yeah. Who should be fucking 10 women at all times as God intended? I can you believe that? Is your general neutral Santa Claus?

Your non-binary God intended. Ah, sorry, that's too sexy for our platform. You're giving men body issues. Oh, am I giving men, I'm giving men body issues? Every fat cut on your platform says that if I'm under six feet tall, I don't exist. Why don't you go fuck yourself? That's how nice guys are made. Remove the dad and just add a bunch of romantic comedies when you're raised like that and you're hormones.

Yeah, then wonder why it doesn't, it doesn't work because, I mean, in so many ways, Hollywood has like ruined people's expectations for things. Relationships, how things work, how life changes. That means you shit. How people change via one kind of insignificant event that just makes it, that's not how people work. That doesn't happen like that. Watch intervention.

That's how people work. Every, I beat off and I edged myself to the end of that show when it says three months after rehab, Shandra had a relapse and then I come. That's what I need. Thank you. Thank you, fucking A&E. Thank you for giving me, thank you for giving me real, how people really are. Oh God. Three months after leaving rehab, Amy got back with her abusive boyfriend and they ODed on heroin together. And they they died in that pose of that volcano hitting those two skeletons that every insane BPD bitch post on Facebook all the fucking time.

I'm really angry today. Um, when you're raised on that and your hormones actually started kicking in during your teenage years, I think I can feel the show. I can feel the live show in Tampa, Mersh, and anybody. I mean, I'm going to invite everybody. I need to have everybody back together. It's going to be fun. I'm going to get a big, big fucking theater.

400 people, 400 seats, like the first show big. I'm going to fill that bitch out. That was bigger than 400 seats. like the first show, big. I don't know. I feel that bitch out. That was bigger than 400 seats. I think it was like six hundred seven. It's demolished now. When you're raised on that and your hormones actually start kicking in during your teenage years,

you think that every girl you have a heart on for is the one. You think you're gonna fall in love by being as awkward as possible, just like in the movies. I mean, that's all you saw growing up. So what the fuck else are you supposed to do? I've been that guy. I know many others were as well, so I understand the mindset,

and it really, really fucked us over. Well, don't worry, if you post sexy, if you turn it around and post pictures of yourself on Bumble, you'll be de-platformed. Eventually, I just got really frustrated because the shit I was taught as a kid just be a nice guy, didn't work. That was until one of my friends gave me probably the best advice ever when you're at a party

or something. Just start talking to a girl you don't know. If she's still talking to you, after 30 minutes, try and kiss her. Odds are, she will kiss you back. If not, she'll be flattered and you'll know to move on. Don't fall in love first or you're doomed to fail. It's simple and stupid but it helped me a lot. Maybe it helped someone else too.

Thanks for all the laughs over the years. Go fuck yourself and say hi to Sean for me. If you ever make it to Serbia, I'll get you guys some homemade rakega, not under the dishwasher shit that Null was drinking. People use that to clean their sinks and toilets. Maybe Null would come too. That would be nice. Yeah. Kind regards. Dooson, a fan from Serbia. Yeah, how about that? Oh, that's very Oh, that's very true that it took me, it wasn't obvious to me that girls don't just keep talking to you to be nice. Yeah. You know what I mean?

They got to be stressed to do. Yeah, if you're still having a conversation and she's still active in the conversation, you completely have a shot. Like that's as opposed to like, oh, it's just a, you conversation, you completely have a shot. Like that's the, as opposed to like, oh, it's just a, she, you know, you talk yourself out of it like right away. But yeah, they don't just stand there and have conversations because they're placating.

You got all this Hollywood shit in your brain. Yeah, all kinds of dumb stuff. Here's one, if Eric called me mellow, my ex breaking into my, excuse me, breaking into my house, listening to my phone calls and more shit. Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh boy.

Six years ago, I was living with my girlfriend at the time with whom I have a daughter. Before this point, tensions and complications in our relationship resulted in our child not living with us at the time, okay? I knew this situation was not conducive to a healthy child psychology and we were rapidly approaching a nuclear fallout.

Trigger warning, stupid crazy bitch doing psychobitch shit. None of this is exaggerated. After a year of dealing with top-contjourniering, including infidelity, stealing my money, doing drugs, self-harm, and not being able to cook with this shit, well, that's a bad one. Should've put that first. Didn't mention bad jobs though, did he?

Should've led with that. Yeah, right. I finally had enough when we were struggling to pay our bills, our bills, due to her spending copious amounts of money on shit like diet pills. And she decided to throw away a check. I had yet to cash. Oh my God.

In her defense, she had a good reason. I decided to spend a day with a friend of mine instead of watching say yes to the dress with her. You forget how some people live. I was just gonna say, I was just gonna say this is somebody's life. Yeah, you really do. This is really somebody's life.

I do. It's nice to be reminded. On discovery, I very calmly informed her that the relationship was leading towards dysfunction. Leading. And that the prudent course of action would be to declare it insolvent and terminate cohabitation arrangements.

I wonder if he phrased it like that. I wonder if he was autistic. Following the civilized discourse, no, he said, that's a joke. I know. Yeah, I mean, that part is a joke. Following the civilized discourse and her voluntary egress,

wherein she kindly left her house keys with me. I love this. It was a very late night and I decided to retire for the night after locking every possible entrance and spreading a circle of salt. Defenestrating her around my bed. I went to sleep crucifix in hand. Nice.

Upon waking, I immediately checked every lock window and door and then went to the business of arranging all the complicated aspects of new found single parenthood. That is a great feeling when your wife or girlfriend is gone for the night, like, was being a friend or whatever and you just get to lay in bed, like, ah, silent farting up a storm, doing whatever.

Yeah, doing whatever. Whatever, whatever you want. Watching trailers. Ordering something if you want. Yeah. You don't have to justify yourself. You don't have to wait for them to figure out what they're gonna order.

Yeah, you can not even talk about it. Right. Not even talking about eating. Oh man, that's really heaven. That's the life you're... I didn't talk. How was your time? I was just getting back from seeing my friend for a weekend.

How was your time alone? I didn't talk about any meal one time. I just ate when I wanted to eat and I didn't have to have a conversation about it. What'd you do? Nothing. It was everything that I thought it could be. Ah!

Getting nostalgic. Upon waking, let's see. Yeah, after hours of phone calls, wherein I went into detail, how I felt about our relationship, her actions, the way her call, the way her calf ended in a hoof instead of a foot, and how difficult it is to snuggle with someone with ram horns.

I finally ended up talking to an attorney. This goes pretty funny, about how I could sue this insane person for custody and move on with my life. In the middle of my conversation, he's alone at home, right? The sliding closet door in my bedroom suddenly shot open. Oh my God.

Oh my God. There's been hiding in the closet the whole time. Revealing my ex, crammed in between articles of clothing and board games. The attorney was talking, but all I could do was stare and disbelief, I found my composure. I told him I would call back and hung up. What happened next can only be described

as a verbal blitzkrag, insults, weeping, begging, more insults, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Now I only sleep with her every couple of weeks. Oh yeah, no matter how good the sex is, women are evil creatures who only want your money and mana. Ha, ha, ha, ha. I vowed to never again speak with her unless legally obligated. Now I only sleep with her every couple of weeks

and only when she has a boyfriend. No, no talking. Very good. Good job. You imagine that. What a leveling out of the closet. Jesus. Fucking e-thoughts, dear Dick, I have a rage.

I tried to buy online content from like five e-thoughts now because I have very specific tastes and every time after I've paid money, they've either just ghosted, blocked me or claimed I never paid and then blocked me. I've had enough. Dude. People say female privilege isn't a thing.

Who says that? People say female privilege isn't a thing. It is obviously a thing. If you're good looking for sure. I mean, even if you're not, like if I saw a guy, because somebody on the street I would think, pussy, if I saw some fat bitch crying, I think like, ah, that sucks.

That sucks for you. Like your fat and sad. Yeah, and it's gonna be fat and sad. Pretty good. People say female privilege isn't a thing, but I can't pay my bills by just straight ripping off horny dudes. What a joke this year has been. Man, don't pay them for that shit. Yeah. Well, that's, I know. I'm like, come on, dude. Like, stop. Just learn, learn your lesson and just pretend to be somebody else. Have like a hot profile picture and chat them up and get what you want, but pretend to be on. If he's like, it is very, the very specific taste thing is why they

fuck you. Why he's trying to do this, I think, you know, it's not so you can't, no, run of the mill porn works for him, I guess. Yeah, I asked him about that. He said, I need them to have a tail plug be dressed in like childish clothing and wearing glasses. And I need them to put underwear in there. For real?

Yeah. Underwear in there. It's so quick. And pull it out just as they're about to come. That's very complicated. I know. So it's like a few things. It's so crazy how people's brains work, man.

I need them to have underwear in their pussy and pull it out just as they're about to come. Well, good luck. Damn, man. You know, it's pretend to be hot. Why are you paying? I mean, just, what are you going to say? Good luck to you, sir. Good luck, buddy. You see what else I've got here. First breakup, Dick, I just turned 16 and I was just broken up with. The girl was stunning and had cantaloupe-sized cans. Wow. She was 15. I retract that.

I have no comment about her body in any way. No. I have no thoughts about it at all. I thought he was dating older. I did. I thought he was dating the old- He said the age later. I mean, that cant no thoughts about it at all. I thought he was dating older. I did. I thought he was, I thought he was dating. He said the age later. I mean, that can't alope is, you know.

Yeah, it's not, you've just committed a sex crime on me by describing a woman and then telling me. That's called entrapment. That's entrapment. I believe you're going to jail. If you, as soon as you report yourself to the police, we're trying you as an adult. Yeah, because that was, that was, that's entrapment. You did that. That's what Melissa Forthon, you trying you as an adult. Yeah, because that was that was that's

that's your entrapment. You did that. You did that not me. Yeah. She was my first kiss. Well, now I'm reading child pornography. Yeah. Right?

Is that not what we've learned in the last? I don't. I just don't know. She was my first kiss and I really thought I was in love with her. We were together for three years. Of course she did. And I just got my license two days ago and was excited to be able to pick her up every

morning. But of course, now I cannot. So Dick, I know many first relationships don't end well. So from the beginning, I was trying to prep myself for this day. However, I'm still heartbroken and don't know what to do. I already work out as much as possible. Any other advice for getting over her? Can you advice for this guy? Get over her, get on somebody else.

Well, I mean, that's what, if you think she was the one, just realize that at, you could, at best, you could say she was a one. Exactly. I read something that said, A one, don't ever get over, the guys never get over anybody. I kinda believe that. Yeah, I do too.

See, I think that women do. Yeah. And I'm heartless. I have suspected that at times. If no soul, that's why. I just think that emotions work differently, I think, in men and women. Yeah, they don't have any. You know, you said it.

I have no data to back that up. I read it in a study. Did I tell anybody to call in today? If anybody has something to talk about, let me... You have to read the Civil War letter. Oh, yes! Okay, let me read it right now. Yes, I contributed to the show. Probably the one time I reminded you to do something in 228 episodes. I'll see you here. What's up, Riley? What's Adam from Hughes? Oh, he got in a couple gun

fights. Jesus. Tell me a little more. Yeah, I'll bring him on. Gun fights. cringe. I think he said cringe. Really? Humiliation and failure. They're okay. Oh, great. Okay. Oh, he sent it. It's in a fucking word. It's in a word doc. Honey, can you grab this out of the printer? That's not too long, but I want. Yeah, but it's, so this is a guy in my darling. I hope this letter finds you well. Hey, to give you even though she goes that I really got really lucky and that she responded to my multiple choice survey, were she, oh, were she identified the letter? So this guy wrote in a while ago saying that he was talking to a chick and

she ghosted him. Well, they're goofing around right on. Yeah, they're flirting or whatever. And they had a civil war thing going, I mean, you know, you have stupid stuff going, you're flirting with chicks. And turns out she hasn't seen the Ken Burns documentary, the Civil War. Therefore, the humor was completely lost on her is what I'm guessing. Right? So she saw even though she ghosted, I was really lucky that she responded to my multiple choice exit survey. I would that would be great. Exits. If you could get an exit survey on a relationship. Totally. Like a year later. Totally. Not when you're, because when you're right when it happens, okay, I don't, I don't believe that. I don't believe that.

Where she identified the letter as the reason she lost interest in me and sent the letter back. She's fine. She's fine. She's fine. She's fine. She's fine. Well, she didn't, yeah.

Clearly didn't get it. I've a taxi. We have a letter and it's entirety to this email. If this ends up on a bonus episode, I want to say that my invention this month is post-relationship exit surveys. This is a great invention. Excellent.

The last three girls I went out with ghosted immediately afterwards. After the same letter. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Just out of nowhere, he inserts a, takes on the persona of a slain civil war soldier. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. And the answer takes on the persona of a slain civil war soldier. And I sent them a survey where they all responded.

I found out I was pushy. Yeah. Had a weird alt-right haircut. Oh. And another confirmed I am too short to be alive. Oh, God. Kion can't post just women existing, honestly, is bad for men's mental health. So Kion getting his picture deleted for body shaming.

All the, I always say, is body shaming women? Right. Men are so shallow. Like, well, they got the fuck exist. I don't like your haircut and your fucking too short to exist. God damn, man. I want to know who his body's shamed by having your own sexy, a man having his own sexy picture on a dating app.

It's the man who's bought, it's the other men who's body's shamed, it has to be. But how? You're not looking at other fucking men. I know. I know, but they might feel bad having to compete with that. It's fat, it's fat chicks. It is, there is no, I have never seen a man

on a dating app ever, not even one time. It's them projecting their feelings onto other fat men. But how would they see it? That's what I want to know. I don't know. Only people who would see your picture are women. I don't know.

We are all fat. Yeah. Okay, here's this letter. I don't even. You are all fat. Yeah. Okay, here's this letter. I don't even know how these work. Don't listen to me. Oh God, this letter's bad. April 21st. I get to do a voice.

1843. Are you gonna know it? North, Northumberland County. Darling, I hope this letter finds you in good health and good spirits. I'm just doing wrong. The trenches we've been stuck in for weeks now grow as deep as my love for you.

I gotta send this guy a shirt or something. This is really how horrible. These dreary scenes remind me of the final poem I read to you before I took the train westward. Dead, one of them shot by the sea in the east and one of them shot in the west by the sea dead, both my boys. He's like, I gotta quote there in the middle.

Oh my dearest. Oh, that's from. I mean either, oh my dearest, I don't mean to worry you. I know how you get at nights, but the war weighs so heavily on me. Though each passing day brings me closer to you, I can also hear the hearse draw near and near. Um, she, she's like clearly like no sense of humor too. Yeah. It's a dumb

letter. Yeah, like out of the, it's clearly a, it's clearly a joke. But again, she would not be able to play the war game. Yeah. My only hope is that both sides simultaneously put down their muskets and this frivolous war is exposed for the theater. It truly is. He's getting a little too political. Chicks don't like that. Right. As I look at each of the men in my battalion, we increasingly become strangers to each other

and more alien target. Wow, this is like a platoon. All right. So she has no idea this is a civil war letter. I mean, no, totally. She's like, what are they talking about? They think it's like a letter, like a real letter. Like, what are you talking about?

Are you pretending you're in like, the Persian Gulf or are you that way? Yeah, what are you talking about? I know she has no idea what the fuck he's talking about. The memory of your cherry blossom eyes and ripe bosom. Well, you got bosoms in there. That's good. Yeah.

Just throwing some more in. Is the soul thread keeping my sanity? The watery jungle surrounding us beckons louder and louder. My bayonet, my bayonet in gorgeous with the thought of you. The siren sings and sucks our souls into the depths to see. Oh, when will my time come? Either to flee or fight. please, please pray to God to quickly reveal my destiny.

With love, private, and he's got it like an S-quire thing. I don't know if that's his name though. No, there you go. Sorry, buddy. The relationship color don't. Well, to Braini. To Braini, you're too, got to have too much history education there. Yeah, you did. Yep, you three have too much history education there. Yeah, you did.

Yeah, you're through, you fucking made her feel dumb. Yeah, you made her feel dumb. Stick to the classics. Bozums manhood. Bozums manhood. Bozums manhood over and over. You dodged a ball out there.

All right, who's in the gun fight that you guys wanted to call in? Adam from Houston. Let's see. Adam, you there Didn't tell you doing hey, what's up, man? You're some kind of gunfight. What's going on? Oh, yeah, man in light of all the stuff that happened with boogie I thought I should call in and give everyone a PSA about warning shots and how they are never a good idea Yeah, yeah, oh, man

First off, it's the law and it's a bad idea So I was also gonna offer you my services as your prison expert because these warning shots that I sent off ended up landing me five years in prison for my other business fired. Oh, god. Like actual prison. Yeah, like we're for like actual real, real prison and not real prison because Texas does a different man.

So you spend two years in a transfer unit before they actually throw you on your ID unit, which is like your real prison. Oh God, what did you, what did you do? What, who did you shoot at? Frank Hassel, was that comedian that you shot? A warning shot, no. It's a time-honored Texas tradition

to shoot a man that fucks with your transportation. So that's what happened. Well, yeah. What did they do? Well, so I have to wake up at the blood crack at dawn to go work at the machine shop. So I'm waking up at 2 in the morning to, you know, get my day started. Yeah. Well, I go to a gas station, get some cigarettes, a dude follows me home, jumps out the vehicle and tries to carjack me with a meat cleaver. Damn. Well, yeah, but I have this railroads spike that I have like sharpened down that I used to get tools out of my CNC lathe, and this thing is on like a knife sheath right on my hip.

So when this dude ran up on me, I pulled it on him real quick, and he stepped back long enough for me to lock my car and get the fuck out of there. And I went to the apartment. Is this happened to you? What? Like knife fights and car jacking? So you're prepared for it. This is unusual to me, which is, which is what's weird, because I before

this, I was a hustler in a gangster for three years. Like I was, I was actually like pretty deep in the gang, like hanging out with like Mexican gangsters and shit like that. But I don't look the part though. So I mean, really, this dude ran up on the wrong one. He just didn't know. the part though. So I mean, really this dude ran up on the wrong one. He just didn't know. So what gang were you a part of? I was an independent contractor man. I just knew people. Just doing crimes, doing crimes and violence. No, just hustle and weed man. That's a fucking job. Especially in the middle of Texas, like deep and prohibition in 2008 when this shit was happening.

Yeah. So I mean, it was hard to get weed back then, man. I mean, yeah. Shit, my crew, we looked like the fucking planet tears from Captain Planet. And so we were able to make shit happen. Okay. But I quit doing all that shit anyways, which is what's so fucked up about this. So this guy tries to fucking car jack me. Well, I've run into him again a month later at a gas station man. Just I walk up to someone to bomb a cigarette. Hey, it's the guy.

Yeah. I was like, I don't mother fucker. So, but this time I'm strapped. Like I got my gun that's like in a holster like right in my abdomen. And I have a button up shirt that I'm wearing that has like a fucking venom print for spider man on it, but the only of the top three buttons are button. So, okay. Yeah, wearing some shorts and flip flops, man. Okay. And so, but all I got to do is just reach inside the shirt and pull out my gun. Like this dude has no idea.

I got the drop on him so bad. So what can I gonna say, shit back up? Oh, it was just a 22 buckmark. I mean, I just wanted to give him a love tap. I wasn't trying to kill anybody. Yeah. Did you give him your cigarette? I did not get my cigarette.

I mean, I don't know if the student immediately snapped to who I was, but I mean, as soon as we locked eyes, there was that tension in the air. We like, oh shit. Some sums about to happen. So anyways, he said he had a gun. We're saying shit back and forth to one another. And eventually I feel like it's about to hit that breaking point. So I pull my gun out and shoot twice in the ground.

And this dude like tenses up, does this weird like serpentine running pattern running away from me? He gets to the edge of the gas station, but he's at the wrong. You shot the gas station. He's pardoned. Hold on. Okay. He has to run to the other side of the gas station, like basically run back by me to get to his partner set up around the corner. And as he's running back by me, I mean, from my vantage, it looked like he was trying to pull a gun out of his waistband. And so I was going to back to people one. So I shot him in the side. Okay. He did like this weird bunny hop, kept on going. And got around the corner where I guess he hopped in the car and burnt off. But as soon as he got around the corner, I'm like, well,

shit, I need to get the fuck out of here. Yeah. So I fucked off to the rim fair. And I know a bunch of people that work at the Renaissance festival in Texas, and it's like outpodung nowhere. And they have the rim fair. You going to skies? They'll never let her gun in the rim fair. No one even knows my name out there, man. Everyone knows me as patches.

Okay. Are you, did you think you killed the guy? Did you think he was okay? I didn't think I killed him. I mean, I just shot him with the 22, man. I had a crazy ass gun collection, man, because while I was hustling, I was in a former life, I was an engineer, and before that, I was a nurse. So I had a really weird perspective on how to look at hustling.

And so I made sure to have a firearm for just about every application I can think of. And, you know, I was just fucking pissed and wanted to be able to pull out a gun to just let people know that I was fucking serious that I wasn't about to be fucked with. I wasn't trying to kill anybody. Well, yeah, that was what Boogie, yeah, that was Boogie's position on the matter too. Yeah, like a 44 Magnum, man, incident that shit at a damn angle like that. Like really, he should at least get fined over something like that. This date kind of has a problem with people fucking around with firearms go for come find out. I cannot believe he shot into the air like that. Like I thought it was going to be a shot

into the ground and that I would look like an asshole, but I don't know. Something I mean just like I bet he did it the dumbest way possible, the most. I can see in the movies. Yeah. but I don't know, something I mean just like I bet he did it the dumbest way possible. The most thing. Like you see in the movies. Yeah. Shooting and the ceiling of the bar. I hang out with the NFHC crew and I do a monthly bonus episode with them. Yeah, I'm a guy that can actually do a monthly bonus episode.

And so anyways, I'm like, as soon as I saw this shit, I was like, oh my God. So I had to like look up all the laws and figure out all the shit that happened. Like this is some ignorance shit. Yeah. I just couldn't believe what the fuck was happening. I was just so happy that the memes were just the perfect amount of spice. Man, I was laughing my ass off all day and night. So you're at the rent fair hiding out.

Yes. After shooting after winging a car jacket. Yeah. So I stay there for a couple of days and kind of let's shit die die down go back to my apartment fully expecting to see my door kicked in and Everything seemed fine. So sit. I'm good to go take a stroll around the apartment complex and do it all the time And as I'm going around I get shot at whoa and yeah, there's this guy that's like duck down behind a car He's shooting a revolver at me. And so I pulled my buckmark out again, and started shooting at the car to keep this dude

like duck down behind the thing, and I run back to my apartment to grab my shotgun. And what are you gonna kill him with it? Is that you're gonna deal with the shotgun? No, just make my noise. Look, I ended up getting back at the guy well enough anyway. So I didn't know this dude, I never talked to him, but I've seen him around and I knew what Kari drove.

So I go and run and grab my shotgun and come back. As soon as I get out of my apartment with my shotgun man, it turns into state of emergency man. People are just fucking, it's panicking at this point, like running all over the place. But this guy that had just shot at me, I knew his car. He had like a late 90s candy red and Paula was super poker on it. It's a Houston thing. Okay.

What's a super poker? His car. So it just starts shooting his car up with a shotgun and you know, having a gun set up a, set up like buck, then ballistic tip, hollow point slugs, the hog hunting slugs. Oh, God. Oh, my God. Okay. So I shot this dude's car up and then actually the tip hollow point slugs, the hog hunting slugs. Oh God. Oh my God. Okay. So I shot this dude's car up and then actually the car that had dropped a guy off that

originally tried to car jack me, this guy lived in the same apartment complex as me. Man, I ended up finding this car a couple of weeks before then. And really, I'd kind of run the situation down, but I decided to let it go until shit just kind of happened. So anyway, you shut up this car. Some people live. Yeah, and income the cops. So the cops, you know, him, my ass up.

At one point, I just opened my apartment door and walk out there, and there's four cops with ARs pointed at me. And I'm also not really in my right state of mind to say lightly because after this dude tried to car jack me And I was already in insomnia. I basically didn't sleep after that like it really fucked with me. Okay. Yeah, I suppose it would And so I ended up getting locked up. They charged me with two cases to aggravate a assault one with a bodily injury And then I had an illegal weapons charge too for one of the shotguns that I had in my apartment. Yeah. And I was looking at 45 years.

Oh my God. Oh, yeah. That's terrifying. Ended up spending five before I was able to parole out, but I mean shit, I got prison stores for days about all sorts of shit, man, because you know, I I went through the system and I was actually getting a bachelor's degree inside the prison system. And there's only one type of degree you can get in the Texas prison system and that's sociology. So I was like, I was like taking women in society classes where the only woman there is the

teacher. So he's really gave convincing paper about legalizing prostitution kind of one or over. What's your, what's a fucked up prison story you got? Was there, do you have any attempted rape stories? I mean, that's like, that's so hard. People talk about that all the time. That's the meme. And I can tell you, it's not even like that at all.

Oh, thank God. It can't be as much as it's talked about. Because that's the, I mean, that is the otherwise prison sounds great. You just don't have to deal with anybody. You don't have to go to work. It can be painfully boring. Yeah. I mean, people do time in their own ways.

Like, you know, like the only other person I've ever heard talk about on a podcast is like Kyle from PKA. Yeah. He was down for like 60 days. He was still shit. Now McDonald's by the time he got out. He really has no idea what that shit's like. Yeah.

You're in there for years. Oh, yeah. So it's not. I'm in a fuck motel in the furniture factory. Okay. To please tell me about that. Mm-hmm. All right.

So in the furniture factory, I'm making wardrobes and shit for fire department. Yeah, you can what's a furniture factory? What is that? There's jobs in prison. And oh, yeah. I mean, I was a slave. I got forced to do labor that I didn't get paid for. Nor did I get credit for my time.

There's like 13 states that got it that way. Texas of course is one of them. Yeah. And I'm back there. And eventually I get a pretty cushy job at the warehouse. And there's a separate warehouse that doesn't have its finished parts. It has the raw materials. And that thing's basically never open unless they're getting a truck delivery or something like that. So because no one's there, that's when people can sneak

off to and go get some ass. And dudes get horny. What do you think? Do you want to fuck a lot of guys become a lot more gay in prison. And so they need to get it handled. So they pay a little bit to everybody that works in the furniture factory and we all keep an eye out so they can go off and do their fucking. And it's also just a regular motel too. If you're just tired as fuck and you can sneak away from your job, you can just go take

a nap. So do you build them like a little set, like porn set to fuck on that? No, there is an area behind the shelves that you really couldn't see. And I had something that was for me that I slept on. It was on the very top shelf of those warehouse like shelves. So if you're lying down up there, you can't even see that you're up there. So it's right under the intake fan too, because nothing's fucking air conditioned in this end prison. You get me that fucking sucks. God damn. That's the spot right there under the intake. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. I'm talking to everybody going to college classes just

to get in the AC. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, bet. So it's not so the attempted rape isn't as big as everyone. The meme isn't as big as everyone the meme isn't as big as that. I never even heard of it happening the whole time I was down. That makes me a lot more rape elimination act to 2003. If someone rapes you, there's like a separate box that you drop a slip in that goes to like the federal omnibus and they take that shit really fucking seriously. Yeah, there's a lot more rape kits you and then they'll investigate the shit and they'll charge the guy with another crime. He'll get reclassified to maximum

security and have more time stacked on top of it. So people kind of act right about that type of thing and it's not like it was kosher to begin with. Y'all pass a badge for it. You get your prison as a rape. Yeah. That's a huge relief. Honestly, I'm going to start committing a lot more crimes. I know. I know. I just spent all my time playing Dungeons and Dragons in there, man. Oh, with prisoners.

Yeah. That'd be kind of fun. They probably have to give it in a nice way. The furniture factory, a Mormon bank robber figured out how to do it. Oh. Yeah. Who's the, what do I like the most fucked up people you met in prison? I love prison. I could listen prison names all day.

Well, I met a guy that was notorious. His name is Brooks. I was at the same unit with him. He was responsible for the, oh, in Houston, there's a bunch of bodies that were found in a basement. There's like 14 bodies of like young hitchhikers that had been raped and tortured to death. Oh, serial killer. And the Manson murders came out like right after that.

So it got like overshadowed. And this dude was him and another guy that were teenagers with lower kids in for this dude to rape and murder him. And eventually they got where he this guy and they killed him and then went to the cops. And but they got found out because they knew too much. And so this guy worked in the furniture factory with me. And I mean, I was at the same unit with the guy that did the Jasper dragings to. He was in administrative segregation. They couldn't let this guy out because pretty much any black guy would kill him. Like that's just what it was.

We're in drags. The real heinous racial crimes are really bad like that. They can't let people out. So this is all maximum security I'm assuming. You got the... Well, every prison has their own little ad-seg segment. Oh, I see. So it's... I think they throw people in the hole.

Yeah. And I mean, I'd see the units where they got the maximum... You got to get there, man. Like, if you're confirmed to be in a prison gang, they'll throw you in there, or if you're fighting all the time, they'll throw you in there. But other than that, you're in gin pop. And most people are just trying to do their time to get back to their family. Yeah.

That makes sense. What kind of tips do you have for dealing with prison in case we end up there? My friend said, shave your head and pretend to be white supremacist. Keep to yourself and read books for a while. Look, it's just like being on the internet. Lurkmore. You know, the people won't usually come and fuck with you unless you give them a reason to. In fact, if you don't talk to anyone, people are usually about their own business.

Did you, were you able to find liquor or drugs there easily in prison? Yeah, I mean, there's hooch that's around. I mean, people make what you'd call toilet wine all the time, but usually they make it into garbage can. They'll be the normal garbage can that has the garbage bag in it. And they'll have another garbage bag underneath it where they got the hooch brewing. And so they'll, they'll, every once in a while, they'll go and burp the bag of the stuff. And yeah, people will get drunk out there. I found some shrooms in the fields when I was picking onions one time. That seems like the hardest way to pat like also sober, like time moves. So I don't think I could do free life sober because time

moves so slow, but it sucks. It sucks so much. What's the first thing you did when you were out? Oh, come again. What's the first thing you did when you were out after five years of eating? Eat a steak. Yeah. Fuck yeah. No man, prison foods, stocks. Not first. Ask so fucking much.

And everything is a concession when it comes to the food there. So you're never eating anything that's actually good. And so man, you know, I've had a steak like that a million times, but it never tasted so good. Where did you go for it? Texas Roadhouse. I just got some, some filet mignon's. Awesome. All right, man, do you got anything that makes you a rage? Oh, yeah, man. What makes me rage is when people ask me to do something and use the word can. is when people ask me to do something and use the word can, that shit drives me fucking crazy. If someone's like, hey, can you go and take the garbage out? Can you have the air barging my confidence? I'm capable of doing it.

I can, yeah, I'm not going to. Hey, would you? Yeah, that's really what they're asking. And it's a slippery slope. They ask in questions like that, reeks of the double secret reverse psychology that women have, because if they ever say can do something long enough,

eventually it turns into you can do something. It is, it is a trick. Okay, can you do, can you do it? Like, well, my first instinct is to be defensive and say, yes, I can do that, but I don't want to. And you're already in an agreeable state at that time. What the fuck kind of game is this? This is a very dangerous man who knows this much about psychology.

Well, that's he's got a lot of studying. You got to call in again. I love prison stories, man. I interviewed, I was working on this job one time on set. I was in art department. I used to get hired on non-union stuff if I was out of work, if I wasn't working much as an audio guy. Even the non-union stuff pays really well

and I was with this driver. Well, they wasn't driver like a teamster but he was driving the cube truck and he was like fucking hard core Latino gang from Southern California, driving the cube truck. And like he was like fucking, in a fucking hardcore Latino gang from Southern California, face still tatted up. I guess he was like a registered gang member at 12.

And still, yeah. But yeah, all I did was interview him the entire fucking weekend. And he didn't mind, but it was fucking fascinating. All these like, from how he grew up to what, how he got in, how he, and it's like, I think a lot of people don't know, like most people don't, they don't leave gangs,

they just don't come around anymore. You know what I mean? There are ways it's like, and it's cool, like if you go off, and like a credit card, like you know, can't you look? Is that fucked up if you credit? If you go have a family, if you go have a family, you're doing good on your own,

they're like, no, that's good man, like just, you know, stay family, if you go have a family, you're doing good on your own. They're like, no, that's good, man. Like just, you know, stay away, you know, but you're not, you're not out. So but you don't put yourself in positions to have to be down to do something. You know, like you just out to show you all my prison tattoo at some point. But yeah, what's your prison stuff? I mean, it's, it's fucking huge. It's, it's really hard to describe, but it covers my whole back and it's cost me $55 on commissary, buster.

What was the race relations in prison, like the white supremacy gangs? There's hardly no stuff I see on TV, you know? No problems with the Nazis more than anybody else. In fact, that actually gets into a little side rage, man. When people call each other Nazi online, I've had to deal with actual fucking Nazis and people are like, ooh, come on, man, you need a more strict criteria.

Don't call them motherfucker and Nazi. But these people thought that they could tell me something because I'm white like them. And as soon as they started talking about, look, man, like we're white, but I'm not white the same way that y'all are white, man. There's no trash after my white and they get so fucking pissed. Yeah, that sounds like it would piss off white supremacists, all right. Well, look, none of these motherfuckers, all their teeth are made out of black cheetos, man.

I just don't want to hear what these motherfuckers have to say. Black. And I'm not trying to entertain any of this shit. And I mean, she had a one point I actually had inward pass at the pod that I was at because the OG from the seven foes thought that I was funny as fuck. So it gave me the pass. Like I hung out with anybody and everybody that was willing to fucking laugh with me. That's like being knighted.

I mean, that's a black community. That's it. You got that pass. That's, that's a black community. That's a great, you got that pass. That's a big deal because you can't give that to yourself. He's that had a problem with it. Well, what would they do? What would the Nazis do? Like, how do you get a pastel aggro and shit like that? And prison turns men into a bunch of bitches, man, and it makes you obsess about your weight and gossip all the time. Really? Oh, God. Everybody gossip about everything all the time. If something happens on one side of the prison, everyone will know within about 15 minutes. Actually, no prison sign language to how to talk to people and pods across the way. If you can't actually physically talk to them,

because sometimes you need to get a message across the prison. Yeah, what kind of message would you need to get across the prison? Oh, man. So I got written up one time for not showing up to work because my boss was a fucking asshole. How do you not show up to work in prison? Like, do they not know where you are? Do they sense somebody at your table? He was like, you're the top shelf on the air conditioner. I don't know what they're doing.

They see you in the toilet. Yeah. And they're a little right. You often be like, hey, if you don't go to work, we're going to take your commissary away. You're a motherfucker. I love ramen noodles, son of a bitch. But this dude wrote me up. And you can kind of get away with not showing up to work every now and then.

It is slave labor after all. But I was kind of a victim of my own competence and it kind of ended up being an issue. But so he wrote me up. So I got a message all the way across the prison to the janitor that works in the captain's office and he snatched the case off his desk and they got it to me and I gave him a bag of coffee for it. And I just took the case right up. It was yanked off the officer's desk and ripped it up and flushed it down the toilet. It's like antics. Yeah.

They're antics that are happening in prison. Pilferate stealing a lot of fucking. There's a lot of sleep over camp story style situations like shit. I got stories about this shit for days. I mean, I got two, three ring binders full of my journal. I wrote a page every day while I was down. Really? God damn it. Yeah. You got to tell what you got to come on again. You got to tell another one. Oh, man. Well, I got a good story for you. Okay.

You know what, heuristic processes are dick. No. Okay. Basically, it's pattern recognition inside the human mind. It's your way to be able to compact data so you can access it easily. And not very many animals have anything like that. In fact, dogs don't, they don't have the same type of pattern recognition that humans do.

So they're not like we started talking about discrimination and prejudice and how it's actually tied to heuristic processes. That's where racism comes from. And man, this dude raises his hand. He's a really big black guy with tattoos on his face. And he's like, are you telling me that dogs are too stupid to be racist? And man, this professor just looked like he shit his pants. He's like, oh, fuck. You gotta answer this question.

What do you think I'm saying? Very carefully. Otherwise, you're about to have a situation on your hand. Because man, the looks that we're getting thrown around that room, I was like, oh, man, I don't want to be that guy right now. What did he say? It's funny. He said that dogs are incapable of having the pattern recognition to properly discriminate against somebody on basis of race. Pretty good answer.

But they can. They can. On basis of skin color. Skin color, yeah. It's like an AI. Every single AI we make instantly racist. Yeah, I mean, we talked about a lot of weird shit like that. Did you know the babies are racist?

Yeah, I did. That's why I hate that. It's an interesting thing. It's the ingrained inside of all of us to have an in-group and out-group. And of course, people in the in-group are going to want to use their ability to have the advantages of it. And people are the out-group are going to be but hurt about it. Yeah. All right, Adam, that thank you. Please call in again with more prison stories. Yeah. I love them.

All right. And if you ever got any questions about what prisons like, I'll be more than happy to chime in. Oh, yeah. Honestly, now that I know the prison expert, yeah, now that I know there's not, first of all, what I've learned on this show is that they call them. Five years in legit prison. That's that's that's close. I was an expert to me.

Oh, man. How old were you when you went in? So I was 25 when I went in and I had turned 30 a month before I got out. How many years ago is this, you said like 2008 was when all this shit went down, so you've been out of washroom. I started hustling, so I was a hustler and a gangster for about three years. And I was like dealing a bunch of drugs driving like hundreds of pounds of weed around Texas and shit.

Wow. And I was, I had fucked around like that for a long time and I dealt with all of like the real yuppie clientele like, you know, I hung around in a spot that's like a block away from the courthouse. And then after I got out of doing that, I became a machinist and that was actually the profession that I enjoyed and I kind of found myself doing that. But that's when I ended up getting in that gun fight and then getting locked up.

And as soon as I got out, I just got a degree in machining and I continued to do it. Did you ever kill anybody? No, I never really intended to kill anybody. Like I was never like part of what, if I had to kill somebody, then I had really miscalculated like the situation.

I mean, killing someone doesn't make you big or anything like that. And the whole time I was hustling, I was trying to make sure that a deal went through. Like, I had a 460 magnum to shoot somebody's engine block that disabled a vehicle so I could still get money. I don't want to kill anybody. Yeah, sure. Never wanted to kill anybody. Were you in any prison fights? Yeah. Yeah, man. I got stomped out by my celly one time talking shit to a guard. The law had beat my ass a couple of times because I was being a fucking asshole. Man, really, the stories will never stop dick.

And I know you got the rest of your show you got to do. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I can't believe it. I call that call back. Yeah, the moral, the moral of the story is a bookie as a retarded movie. It's shit, right? Bookies, maybe. I got some, I want to plug it, I call that call back. So the moral, the moral of the story is a bookie, is a retarded movie. Right? Bookies and maybe I got some, I want a blog, if you don't mind. Yeah, go for it.

All right. So, hey, everyone, check out my website, remdrinkscom.com, REM Drinkscom. Uranus show day, got 108, the Rich Digmins show, in case you didn't know he drinks com. And also check out the monthly bonus episodes I do with Dave from the NFHC crew on NFHC podcast.com. Got it. I'm glad you guys are still going. Oh, yeah, all right. P. Allen. Yeah. Yeah. All right, buddy. See you. Have a good one. Say hello. Say hello. Good call. Um, you, all right. We've got a, what are you saying, the Trump sign collar.

Oh, yeah, slipknot. All right, let's do some, she's out of town. Oh, is it, well, we do we have the fucking voice thing? I can try something. Try something. Please put it together. We're gonna take a tiny break and then, I didn't know he was calling.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, he was here. Yeah, get him, get him and then, I didn't know he was calling. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, he was here. Yeah, get him and then, let me know when he's here. What's this phenomenon? Looking for a perspective, if you have the time, a friend of mine recently texted me at seven in the morning with a come to Jesus moment, saying that she realizes she has anxiety

and that all her problems in life were because she has anxiety. This is advice question. Uh, nope, Federal Reserve too. She tells me it is all of our problem, all of our fucking problems are the Federal Reserve. Put it on my fucking tombstone. The Federal Reserve killed me. She tells me she had this encounter with this hippie 50 year old woman in a poly relationship and that all of the sudden she just understood everything.

I'm like, okay, for sure, dude. Now a week later, she's pansexual. She's looking for like a belief system to cling to so hard. Women like they need an excuse, they need a permission slip to fuck. They really fucking do. Like they need, they have always needed it. They have needed the church to write them a permission slip. They've needed God to write them a permission slip. They need a permission slip to fuck.

And this is, here you see it. Here you see it. And uses they them pronouns, which are the most fucking confusing thing to fuck. And this is here, you see it. Here you see it. And uses they them pronouns, which are the most fucking confusing thing to use in practice. No, shit. And the people making us use them don't ever find out because they aren't the other assholes using coerc like, yeah, they're not using them. Yeah. People with the pronouns are not the ones, but you don't refer to myself as he, him. I just say I do stuff with people. I don't have to fucking you.

You don't have to use them. That's why it's no big deal. Oh, just use the pronouns. Like, no, it's fucking hard too. You don't have to do it. Oh, he doesn't need a modulator? Are you sure? I don't want to modulate any, All right. All right slipknot.

Well then how are you can just talk in a Southern accent or something or like a like a Chinese accent you're off mute, but you're there. Yeah, it's off Yeah, there you go Sean. Please fix It's the pleasure to be on the show. Wow, so you are the Trump sign. You are the Trump sign guy. A Trump sign was erected on the hillside of the 405, the busiest cluster fuck freeway in LA by the Getty Museum, a beautiful pass. By Skurball.

By Skurball packed with traffic. Pretty funny. And you put up a Trump sign that looks exactly like the Hollywood sign, but it says Trump. Ha, ha, ha. Right? No, it was a gay proposal, but it was a Trump sign at my high school. Oh, God, damn it. It was saying, what? This is a different guy. Riley, you jackass. No, this is completely different.

Somebody proposed to me at my high school. Somebody proposed to your high school? Yeah, it was a gay proposal, and it said, will you make formal grade again? And it was a giant sign, and it went viral all over the school, all over the city. Okay.

Oh, God. Oh, I'm embarrassing. Flareus. Okay, and what happened? You got proposed to? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got proposed to, and I mean, I got a bunch of hay, and because I don't have a Trump supporter, I walk around, I have the mag hat on. And then from that, I went to having a Betsy Ross flag. That's bigger than me.

And I mean, it was a... Him and Timble. Trump sign guy. Riley, what did you think I meant by Trumps? What did you mean by Trump sign guy? Did I read that wrong? Oh God. Where's the horn?

Deep dick. Hilarious. Man, I thought you were somebody else. I apologize. Not your fault, buddy. Yeah, that's not your fault. Yeah, that's fine. I also, I'm on YouTube, but I am also close with a lot of Republican.

I guess you can call them celebrities, Magahawk, Big Black guy, where's the Magahawk? Kevin McCarthy, the House of Representatives, minority leader. Oh, yeah. He's called me. Yeah, he's called me because we're both from Baker'sville, then he knows me. I'm a meaty company that I work for. Oh, yeah, so you got you got proposed to what was the answer? What was the answer? Well, the answer was yes, of course. the answer. Um, well, the answer was yes, of course. Yeah, but I'm only 15, by the way, I'm a sophomore. Disavow. It's about you. It shouldn't be too young. Should be thinking

about anything about thinking about staying out of politics and for God's sake, stay away from women or men or others or they're all horrible non binary from whatever you think you're into. You're into. You're definitely not. Don't get into it. Well, I've been sitting politics for like three years. Oh, that's a huge mistake. Don't get out of politics. It's a passion.

I honestly enjoy it. I enjoy it. Actually, I was getting back from DC. Someone mentioned that I just got that I wasn't in town, but I just got back in town. I was in DC this weekend. Oh yeah. What you learned from going viral for getting proposed to what's here? What's the takeaway?

Well, it's enjoyable. The hatred I enjoy it. Yeah. Well, then you got to be that kind of guy. If you're going to be online, right? I swear to God, the Trumps, did gotta be okay with it. Did you not say the Trumpsign guy? Right? I'm losing my fucking mind.

I'm all out of sorts here now. I apologize, sir. So you're 15, you got proposed to. You're a lot of hate. You got a lot of hate, right? And he likes it. Are you gay? No, it was actually to not pay the expensive price for tickets.

So we went, we tried to go viral, so we said, you know what? Let's do a gay proposal. And let's get these free tickets. Disguised made for the internet. It's like a big, it's like a big ripe whatever that everybody wants to fuck. It's a big ripe, big wet pussy. The internet is that everybody, you can line up and play it and fuck it all you want. All right, man. I apologize. We thought you were a different guy. You're fun. Yeah. You're fun. Fun anyway.

When I went to DC, I saw Trump yesterday, he gave his first public appearance and he got COVID-19. Yeah. And it was pretty good. I saw Candace Owens give a speech. And I filmed all of it. It's going to be on my YouTube channel pretty soon. All right.

What's your YouTube channel? And then I'm going to read this advice later. What's your YouTube channel? Sammy Wells, SA, M-M-Y, Space, W-E-L-L-S. I just started a couple weeks ago, but I'm at like 260 subscribers. Okay, good luck with that. I gotta go, buddy. Thank you for calling and good luck with your YouTube channel. Oh, Riley, fucking jackass. Good luck using your real name on your YouTube channel. Hey, this is, there's what he says here. Fine, this isn't the first time this has happened

to my friends. I feel like I'm taking crazy pills. Anytime someone says they figured out the root of their problems and has this entire realization arc, it just sounds like a load of horseshit. Am I the asshole here? Is this normal? Thanks.

You want to fuck this person. That's the only reason you care. That's the only reason anyone cares about anything women do is because they want to fuck this person. That's the only reason you care. That's the only reason anyone cares about anything women do is because they want to fuck them. Otherwise, it is just an annoying burden to hear anything about their lives. Just FYI, the reason you're thinking this is weird or whatever is because you want to fuck this girl

who's doing pansexual now, who's they them, you want to fuck her pronouns? I just really just do it. Just fuck her. This was a continuation of the same letter. Ha ha ha. Don't worry about anything. Oh, it's weird or anything.

You want to have sex with her. Go have sex with her. Talk her into fuck her. Yes. If you're in a relationship, she's on whoever you're with or stop dealing with their whore. None of anything that women do make sense ever. If you're not a relationship, she ain't on whoever you're with or stop dealing with their whole, none of anything that women do make sense ever.

If you're not having sex with them. But to, yes, you're completely right for the reasons. But to answer his question, it does seem weird and it probably should seem weird because it's usually not a eureka moment where their entire life is quote unquote fixed like that because they realized that's been my whole problem the whole time.

The whole problem is you're not getting fucked. That's fucking it, that is the whole problem. What I'm saying is having sex and you're fucking with your brain. What I'm saying is that will be the solution until it isn't, until the next thing, that's the root of my problems. I just need to do this and it'll be a series of that.

And she probably, and then you're probably will never find out the real cause of her anxious. There isn't a real cause. There is no fucking real cause. There may or may not be. The cause is having been born. That's the worst thing that anyone has ever been charged with.

More cause. And only more likely to be a combination of things. It's almost never just this. God. If I had ever been to that woman in the first place. My life would have changed for, you know, I'd only booked the right guest. My house actually.

Fuck, just fuck her. Just fuck her. Don't worry about what she's all. She's doing all these decisions. And I don't know if she's, I don't know about what she's all she's doing all these decisions and i don't know if she's i don't know if that's bullshit and is rather right and just go have sex with her fuck jobless college student wanting to make a lot of money this is from miles edge lord hey dick and shun i want some advice and i get a job

and one that makes a shit ton of money for context i'm employed on my uh... i'm an unemployed twenty two year old with two semesters left in college who's realizing that he needs to get a job and get a life. I've been jobless for about five years of college so that the government would pay for all of my college through financial aid. But now I'm about to enter the real world. I need to figure out how to live in it with no work experience, with no work experience, with no idea how to get into the job market. I'm lost, quite scared though. I end up a loser who lives with his mom at age 30. Wow. I want to make enough money to move out of my mom's house for her and my sanity. Just mom. Make enough to sustain my life and make enough that I can give to a charity and make a difference.

Take that part of your brain that wants to give to charity and make a difference. Find it. You're the charity. Fucking eradicated. That is a sick, entitled way to think about life that you are gonna make a difference. You are lucky to eat. What? The charity's gotta be you.

You gotta, you have to, and it's not a selfish thing. Just a bit. It's not a selfish thing. You do not have that kind of power. It's a survival thing. That's what you want. You need to look out for you. Nobody is capable of looking out for you like you

and you have to do that. Best thing you can do? Make money. Don't bother anybody. That's the best charity you can do. The biggest, that's the most difference you can make. Not affect anybody else. That said, I have no idea what I was supposed to do

to get out of the house and into the realm of making enough money, start living my own life. Get a job, motherfucker. So he's almost graduated, he's got a couple of semesters left in college, like his studies got a year. I mean, I should've been thinking about this for six years, man. This is a long, this is a long con. I wanna hear from you guys about what you'd advise.

I wanna hear from you guys how to make a shit ton of money. Man, make a dollar, or at least how to get my own place. If you could figure out how to make a dollar, you can figure out how to make more. Yeah, make one dollar first. But it's like, everything you learn in that, make two. Is he going to school for something he could actually get, he was the degree to get a job with whoever does. I mean, some people do, if it's specialized or something,

but a lot of people just, they find out that what they went to school for is either not lucrative or they find out that they don't want to do that. So I don't know, but. Okay. Here's. I don't think there's, for me, not enough info there, but not enough info. Not for me. There's plenty of info for me.

Talk about charity, giving back. Well, I can say, you can say what, what not to do with mom coming out. No, no. You can say what not to do, but I think I need more info to tell like, make one dollar. Don't make a ton. Make one over and over and over again. Just make the one and see how that works out for you. Let's see.

I've got some bumpers for Sean Animal Facts. Do you want to see bumpers? You want to hear one of these? Sure. This is from Alex Walker Smith. Uh-huh. I thought that was really the Trump guy. I can't believe it. I can't believe it. I can't believe it. I can't believe it.

I can't believe it. I can't believe it. I can't believe it. I can't believe it. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out.

It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out.

It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. It's a jungle out. This is the other one from Connor Curr. I couldn't understand the first sentence. Yeah, but you got to have, if you're going to do vocals, you have to make them understandable. I like them both. It's got a bond.

Totally different. Not very respectful to be honest. I'm okay with it. You're okay with that. Well, which one would you like? Because we're gonna do what Sean's animal corner. Obviously one on the intro and one on the outro.

No, that's too... You gotta have the same. No! I think this is good! This is great. It's a jungle-y. I'm down. Doesn't save Sean's animal corner.

That would be nice. Maybe we could make... Maybe those guys could collab and come up with one together. Let's see here, Sean's, and this is from Robert, McGregor, all tortoise shell cats are female. Did you know that? I did know that.

You did, you knew that? I knew that. How? How did you know that? I read about it. When what? Because of where the, it's copied with the way that the inheritance works for that.

But where would you read that? Like where would you come across that information ever? I've noticed that, I've read that a lot of times. Ha ha ha ha ha. Okay, this is because the gene for the tortoise shell color pattern is recessive and carried on the X chromosomes and the need to display the, train, there you go.

All right, well, that's one for Sean. I don't know how, but... This is from Stephen Beck, because there's a kind of mite that is impregnated before being born. There's one male in every generation. That's how I feel. It mates with all the females, then they eat their way out of the mother's body. This male stops eating and just dies at that point.

The females will eat insect eggs for four days until the cycle repeats and they're eaten from the inside by their own children. Did you know about that? I do not know about mites and you don't know anything about mites. No, that's your weak spot. No, I thought one of them. I can't believe it. Hey, John, animal grown.

John Smith, did you know the ter-ter tur, turito, turitopsis do me also known as the immortal jellyfish, the immortal jellyfish. Oh, it's out there. You know, is it by a lot? You know, one of the biologically immortal, like a fucking, that's the next thing he says. Yeah. How did you know about an immortal jellyfish? Because I've read about biological immortality.

Because you are immortal? Well, no, because I'm interested in that concept. Hydra is like that, I think. Hydra? Yeah, that's not a real animal, that's fake. No, it's like the little hydra, like the, the, the, not a microscopic dragon.

That too. Heads. It is one of the few known cases of animals capable of reverting completely to a sexually immature colonial stage after having reached sexual maturity. I have read about it. I have read about it to the individual.

So you knew that. Oh yeah. I remember reading about it. That's fucking unreal. So you two for three. Today. All right, this has been another episode of Sean's Animal Corner.

Uh-huh. I'm pissed about that sign thing. That was retarded. That was hilarious. I spent way too much fucking time on that. All right, everybody, this is the Dix show. I think I'm gonna wrap it up, do some voice moves. Patreon.com slash the Dix show,

you get the evil dead, the evil dead commentary. Boy smells, picture.com slash the Dix show, you get the evil dead, the evil dead commentary. And I think that's about it for this week. The evil dead commentary with Vito, if I'm a good beer today, but whatever he's sleeping. See you next Tuesday, fucking Vito. I know, fucking Vito. Presenting. Is that a dick? DICK! DICK!

DICK! DICK! DICK! Ready! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Oh, are we done or advice now? I mean, I'm gonna do some voicemails and see what else I forgot to cover. Oh, it's so pissed off earlier today. Virus, shamers.

See those people. If you get the virus, if you get the COVID, you're an idiot and you fucked up. Oh, that's not fair. Well, it's also, you're, that's the best thing that we have is people who had the virus. Some people just get it. Yeah, and you're now immune.

You can't carry it or give it to people. There's documentation, you can get it again. You can get it again? Yeah, like for fun. They think very, it'll most likely be a very mild case, but yeah, you can. But but very low chances because they're finding the antibodies are not, you know, they don't last forever, but okay. But yeah, no, that's not fair.

I mean, some people just get it doing just just living there, going to the grocery store. You know, people are going. They've made this, they've made this whole lockdown and mask thing. They've set it up so infallibly that if you get it, now it's like, oh, you fucked up. Like, well, no, it's, you know, tiny. Yeah, it's in the fucking air. There's no, there's no, you didn't, nobody washes their hands.

That's why we're getting it. I mean, there's no failsafe. Yeah, here we go. Hey, Dick, you wanna know it makes me a rage? People who tell others how they should have spent their money. Oh, yeah. There's a guy who made that from Hollywood sign. Yeah.

Are you reading comments and people are saying, oh, you should have just spent your money. You should have donated the money to a charitable organization. Yeah. I don't think that guy thinks that, don't do no on your money to an organization. Why is that?

That girl's like herself. This is life. Yeah, the people say, the kiss is supposed to be smooches. If you're gonna gross me out, he did an actual kiss. Well, he said, kiss is more. Yeah, it smooches.

Yeah, fuck it up. So I hate that word. People do, they do, they're very preachy about your money. And they also have, like they also have saved money themselves. Yeah. Go, you really want to do what you really, what you should really do. Like, do you have even one dollar saved? Because if you do, then go fuck yourself. So, stop telling me how to spend my fucking money. Right. Right.

If you're not spending it on, I mean, do you, do you know, do you understand except telling me how to spend my fucking money. Right. Right. If you're not spending it on, I mean, do you know, do you understand how poor people are? Like do you really fucking understand that they're like getting raped while they're trying to find clean water every day, that they're shitting, where they literally shitting, where they live?

Like that's the world that we're in. So can you pump the brakes on the interrupting shit? Men are interrupting like bitch. There's people are like fending off rapists trying to get clean water and shitting on the fucking floor. Are you bitch, are you for real? Because it's just that's something you might be able to, you might be able to shame people into complying with.

But those other, just to say. It's just not like a goddamn scam. The other stuff is just too big. And it's so easy to fix. I mean, it's so easy to fix the hot, the, the amount of homeless people in LA, especially 150,000, whatever homeless people every night in, uh, in LA is 150. Yeah. 150,000 people.

God, that's, that's an incredible amount, isn't it? I mean, kind of, I think I could personally figure it out. Well, let's just build a bunch of, well, let's build a bunch of, I mean, we have, you guys have prison, right? We'll just pretend it's a fucking hotel. How about that? Just release all the people who are in there for drugs and then put the homeless people in there and you know, pay the cops the same.

I don't actually fucking care. Pay them the same, just tell them to pump the brakes on all the crazy Just tell them they're there to get drinks and hand jobs But fucking and with for the ins for the people who are born insane. Yeah Hey, they tired little rage here fucking fucking dumb you over And so I'm like 25% capacity opener whatever now and Say forget your mask at home then now they fucking

sell them at the host this thing for a dollar yeah so you can wear it and walk 10 feet and then take it off the bar. Oh put it on between bites you fucking pigs put it on between bites you fucking idiots you'll do anything You will do anything that you're told. Put the mask on between bites. I'm, I'm, I'm, did you see that? God, did you see the put it on between bites? Sean? No.

Let's call for anything. Put it on between bites, really? Yeah, but mask between bites. Newsom's office says to keep masks on between bites. I'm eating now. Look, you're really then just don't go to the restaurant. They've got the tables apart.

You're outside. How do you even say that? Just for go the restaurant experience. That's getting ridiculous. Going out to eat with members of your household this weekend, the Democratic governor's office tweeted. Yeah. Don't forget to keep your mask on in between bites. Do your

part. Yeah, that's to keep those around you healthy. Look, there's, what do you think about that? Well, I think there's, I think there's things that are reasonable and things that are just pretty ridiculous when it comes to that. You don't get the feeling that you're being tested. I can't see if you do this. Yeah, you don't get the feeling that you're being tested. I can't see if you do this. Yeah, you don't need to. You know what else would help go of it? Hold hands with guys. You have a guy friend kissing each other on the mouth that builds up your immunity. How much could, how much could that possibly help? How much could it hurt? No, I mean, just, I mean, you're putting stuff, you're putting something on your mouth and off all the time.

Maybe. Yeah, I'm pretty sure they're not gonna whittle it down to that fine point and like quantifying what that would do. So, I don't know. It's clearly just some idiot thought that. Yeah. Sean.

Yo. This is Alex. I am very disappointed in you. Uh-oh. A green with ink of the no- about no big cookies that's absurd have you never had chocolate peanut butter no big cookies no I will give you a recipe right now most no big cookies are dogs shit I agree with you but not these okay are good no big cookies.

Here you go. No, they're not. Well, and just make the fucking cookies. To reach tables, phones are cocoa powder. No, no, no, no. I want to be enlightened. To reach tables, phones are butter. It's just butter.

It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter.

It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter. It's just butter. half cup of peanut butter and three cups of folks, you just get some quite a row. Oh, it's a nothing man. Those for being out meal. I don't know. It's just going to be really tough like all the liquid stuff.

Looks like he votes. Yeah. Put them into a low body. Shit. On parchment paper, bottom dry for 15 minutes and their hard cookies.

Just like any other cookie. They're not like any other cookies. They're not they're not cookies. They're not cookies. You know I'm going to have to congeal mess of brown sugar. A very disappointed in you. I'm going to make these. You're gonna make these no big cookies?

Why not? If I can't make anything in it, you have to work for harder this point, but Sean, I'll try. I'll take on the point. It's shameful. Shampoo, shampoo, shampoo. Well, I...

I'll... Go fight yourself. Whoever your guest is, they can go back to themselves. Oh, yes. Well, okay. I really go back yourself whoever you guessed is taking a lot of themselves. Oh, yes. So guest is an empty chair and a Trump proposal. Beetle. Beetle is supposed to be here. We had a lot of problems.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah, I, uh, I would try those. I've just I've never had a no baked cookie that was any good. Here's a no baked pizza. So it's to eat a bunch of flour and cheese and some salami. Well, yeah, it's made with a crushed, it is salty and crackers. Yeah.

Here's a tortilla and some ketchup. It's a no baked pizza. Yeah. It's really fucking phenomenal that we found out this. We've been baking like suckers for 2,000 years and we figured out how to no bake, make cookies and not bake them right just eat the sugar idiot now we don't need women at all I'm listening to you uh fuck I can't remember what episode it was me neither little shan's animal corner someone gave some bullshit information

about how lighter doesn't stop growing all it takes us like a fucking five second Google search to find out that that's a goddamn man. So yeah, I thought fucking people, man, but I was right on there. You were right that it was big. And I was like that I don't know about the the stop growing thing. They get so excited they just send in facts and they're not facts. It's just shit that I heard. Yeah, it's not. I wasn't aware that they had like an indeterminate growth. Well, they don't, they don't know. No, I know. That was, of course,

they don't because that's retarded. Yeah. I just know that they're bigger than either of their parents. As the biggest cat you can make. Okay. They can stand on their hind legs and dunk a basketball. Really? Yeah. That's how fucking big those things are in a regulation size. Oh, yeah. Wow. Yeah. They can. What makes me rage Advertising and gas stations. You can't even go to a fucking gas pump these days without getting fucking I know I know Fucking hey man. He's right and I was gonna get you know, I think a gas. I saw Jimmy fell and on a fucking I swear to God. You do fucking anything these days without ads.

Yeah. Watch, in five years, you're gonna go to a fucking bathroom and they're gonna be turned to Sully, a Taco Bell's new artery clogging in Shalada. You're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold. You won't be able to close your fucking eyes. You're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold

, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold , you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a fucking cup of wine in the cold, you're gonna put a It's going to taste like mustard for the chick. Can't do fucking anything without people trying to fill you shit. See ya. Yep, good call. You're absolutely right. It's fucking crazy.

I'm just going to take over ISIS. All of a sudden I hear this, all of a sudden I hear this, you know, when this is first started happening, I hear this like radio speaker. I'm like, there's not a car back that's fucking, you know, it's right on the pump. I was like, God, I hated when they started doing that. Me too. It's not Jimmy Fallon the other day. It's like, and you can't, I mean, you can't even say to destroy them, right? That's obviously, I'm no one who want to do that and I don't want anyone to do that.

Yeah, right. Right. No, I mean, you can't even say it. Because the advertising runs the whole fucking world. So you cannot even say it. I'm gonna have to go start getting gas in like the worst parts of town where hopefully those things have been gouged out or never put in because I know they'd be destroyed. Never put in.

That's what you have to say. I'm going to go find never put in. You're never going to go find some really antiquated gas pumps that don't have that shit on them. Just gas. I go up to Baker's field out. I go up to needles on the 99 and I find there's one gas station left in the entire fucking world that doesn't play Jimmy Fallon Talking to me while I'm getting gas. God I fucking hate that guy

Hey deck it's not a deck scenario. Don't make me a rage returning thing Not the fact that you can return things the fact that when you return something It takes the money out of your account instantly when you return it it take yeah now i'm the fourteen and right but you know that right you your what a billion dollar corporation

maybe you can refund the couple hundred dollars right back now did you got the order and overcharge me yeah i didn't want to pay for the fucking thing. It's usually not that long, but it can't be. When you fucked it up, why do I have to wait two weeks, you fucking half-holes?

Anyway, fuck her out. Yep. Use this as a good one with the, you see that stimulus thing going through. One point, it was one point five. Well, I've seen them going back and forth was one point five, going back and forth on it. Yeah, going back and forth, Republicans are 1.5 and the Democrats are 2.5 trillion. Is that they are going over that amount? I heard the, yeah, coming together and then not and then yes and then no. And I haven't, I, the last couple days developments, I haven't

followed to see people take sides on that. Like, oh, they're stopping it. They're stopping it. They want to grab them by the face and scream until their skin blows off. But that's what they do. We're fighting over the people and then guess what? The people get hit off the fucking table and they just squabble over. The people are off the table. Should have been day one. We're shutting the economy down.

Okay. Well, here's two grand a month, every month. Yeah, I know. Until it's open. It should have been day one. Oh, we're shutting the economy down. Okay, well, here's two grand a month. Every month. Yeah, no. Until it's open. I mean, it should have been, it should have been, I can't say what it should have fucking been.

It should have, it should have literally, the government should have been held hostage. From day one, we're shutting it down. Okay, that's fine. Yeah, I mean, you're shutting it down. We're getting two thousand, everyone's getting $2,000 a month, right? Until you open it up, like, otherwise, otherwise, otherwise what you're doing is a slavery.

Otherwise, it's just a tyranny. Well, you know, we wanna get you guys this big package, but these guys over here, I don't wanna, like, man, it's literally just give people both of you, both of you are fucking around to a, to a degree that is so insane. You can't even convince people of how fuck that is. You can't even convince, well, you know, the Democrat, the Republicans are like, are you fucking retarded?

But you just don't want to give, they're just not giving you money. But they, they work for us. Don't forget that. I mean, if I hear that, if I hear somebody say that, I know I'm not dealing with the serious person. I understand the idealism, but I just buddy. I can't understand people anymore. You can't honestly think that anymore, can you?

Like they can all just give you two grand a month every month, like they could have done it at any time. Do you understand that? Do you understand that? You idiot. At any time, at any time, they could have done this. Hey, Dick. Hey, Sean. Myself in my roommate, we live together. We never rage for you. Cool. So we both work together, right? And we both live together. And live together. And live together. Fuckin' somebody. Somebody who does it, isn't the boss of you who tells you what's it's gonna do.

He's not the boss of it. This mother's fucker. He comes up to us. Myself and my roommate here, really. You know, not the boss. We're talking, we're taking up the garbage, right? Okay. This guy was sitting our hallway.

And he's like, hey guys, can you pick this shit up too? And he, but he's a neighbor. We're talking work for this guy. What the fuck is that? What the fuck are you saying? You're not fucking jacked on telling me how to do my fucking job. Tell me how to do my fucking job. Tell me how to do my fucking job.

Do you think those guys are lovers? I don't know, it's cool if they are. I mean, to say in. It was one gonna propose to the other with the sign that Riley can get them on. We can. Oh, Riley. Um, I just, I wish I said would, I said would come out against those Jimmy Fallon gas machine things.

That's, yeah. I mean, at least like OPEC can make a statement. So I can't say, I mean, at least like OPEC can make a statement. I can't say. I mean, you guys are just, you're a world-renowned brand. Everybody in the world knows the brand ISIS and you're just fucking it up. Like you can be anti, you can be anti-capitalism in a way that people can embrace. See they need, they need Hollywood. They need a little Hollywood in them

to understand, you know. I would take that check in two seconds. Sure. Hey, can you do some consulting for, I mean, we're just happy like we got the Beard's thing, we're doing the Beheadings, oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, what do you beheadings?

Nobody wants to, maybe do Beheadings, but don't put them on the fucking, put them on the internet. What do you guys? Yeah, you're not showing your best side. Yeah, right. You've got to, you've got a good side and a horrific side. Yeah, like you guys, ISIS hates bad drivers. Right, that's something that's a good side.

That's a good side of ISIS. They don't even have bad drivers, right? Or not driving. Oh, I mean, jackpot. Yeah, but see, in two seconds, two seconds, we just gave you a complete facelift, a PR facelift. You are rebranded. Rebranded. A man who saved ISIS, that's what will be my time cover.

Yeah. No, no, no peace prize. It matches the man who saved ISIS. Well, you know, when I started with ISIS, they're making videos of people getting beheaded. What are you doing? What are you guys doing? This is why I cringe. Honestly, they were making videos of people getting beheaded. What are you doing? What are you guys doing? This is why I cringe. Honestly, that's faces of death, 90s shit.

This is, can't do that. There are publicists in Hollywood who are capable of stuff like this. I mean, easy money. Nobody knew Tom Cruise was fucking insane until he fired his longtime publicists. Yeah. And then his insanity actually turned out to be cool.

I think. Maybe so. A long timeline when he did Tropic Thunder, I was like, well, fucking whatever. He's insane because he's so funny. That is really funny. That was, he was great in that. Less gross men.

Yeah. Oh man, you're getting away with a lot of stuff that a lot of people couldn't get away with. And he had, and he had fat hands. Yeah. That was the fucking best part. He dances like he's nervous to dance. He dances like, and he's dancing like he's insecure.

That's what I liked most about that movie that when I was in, he dances like you're insecure. I love it. Thanks. Thanks for letting me know that. When he's like doing his moves, you know? Yeah. It's like, ah. You buy your, you buy your lift of watching, man. After watch that scene, because I'm Mexican. Yeah.

So I don't have these insecurities that white people have. Right, right. I can see him and white people. Yeah, check, I'm, I'm. Big ass word of God. I swear to God. So I tried it just once, you know,

just once I wanted to try it. So I gave a girl. I like, yeah, I like a shoes one. Yeah, good. Good. Good. me that you've training to crush your watermelon with your thighs. You have to be fucking thick. I'm going on a date up amount with this chick in two days now, cuz of you. That's what a godman. If I get with a girl who's training to crush a watermelon with her thighs cuz of your fucking show, I'm buying everyone in my friend group and my entire family when you're fucking sure. It's recorded. That's where the fucking got it.

What are you saying? I'm fucking joking about this stuff. Oh my god. No, it's a great tip. Yeah. It's a great tip. I will get you laid. This show will get you laid.

Mm. Fact. Yeah. That's not a fucking bit. Nice high note there. Oh my god, this is a big one. Whoa, whoa, whoa. All right. All right.

Okay. A little bit of sports sports for us. My rage here is about the current bullshit about LeBron and walking off the court after 11 seconds. Like, are you fucking kidding me? It's not a story. It's not a story.

It's not a story. That you checked out for the last 30 minutes of your shift at your boring ass office job. Because that's what it is at the end of the day. It's just the goddamn job. All this bullshit about not a job. It's sending a message to all the youth that look up to you as a player and all that. It's not it doesn't. It didn't.

What's happened? Did it a number of times the game was over. There was no. And I guarantee you. They were just you running the clock. People that are telling. Like seven seconds. Are you there? This point seven like, the worst person here for

not the court after 11 seconds. It's a known story of it as he is. And if you, because if it's not LeBron, it's not even a story. Because there are people for some reason who fucking hate LeBron. Like, hate them.

Why? Because of his comments on China. Because of his lack of comment. If you comment on, so usually, she, Adam, why? Because of his comments on China. Because of his lack of comment. If you comment on social issues, and you don't comment on China, you're fucking idiot. Yeah, yeah, oh no, he's been hypocritical, but as far as like, you could point to other athletes

who have literally like no redeeming qualities. Oh yeah. He spent more of his money to help people than any- I don't care about that. Anybody in the NBA. I know you don't. But what I'm saying is he walks the walk.

Yeah, I thought it was funny when he made like a whole spectacle about when he was gonna pick which city to go for. That was a big mistake. And I think I think he's pretty much admitted to his self. I thought that was hilarious. I know you did.

Everybody was out in bed. Because it's pathetic to be so like invested in these, I mean, there's this weird like, I know. There's this weird duality people have with sports figures where they like to pretend that they're just doing a job and a sport, but they get really emotionally attached to them. The only reason they have any money is because of the entertainment part. Like it's 100% sports entertainment.

It's not a game or a job. It's like, it's entirely what you're, it's entirely what people are pissed about walking off the court too soon. Like you have to be perfect because that's why you're making, you're not making all that money because of fucking basketball. You know what I mean? It's just like people vicariously living through you. Yeah. Well, no, people align. That's part of fanaticism is for some reason, you identify with a player or certain players or what you think you do. You don't know them, but...

I wouldn't walk off the court like that. Yeah. And they extrapolate all these crazy personality flaws or attributes in these people by thinking it's like, well, that means it's like, it's such, it's just a non-story. It's like not a thing. I like that they, I like that they do it though. I like that they're, the baseball players getting tagged for going out and partying when

they're in other cities. Did you see that? That hasn't happened. I haven't seen one of those come up in a while, but like the idea that they're just going out and going to bars and clubs and whatever is so. Dude, like the idea that you will you would get in the was a Cleveland or was it. Somebody had a big couple teams had big out. I think Miami did. Those are a few months ago.

And everybody's everybody's been good that you would get to that level and then have to sit in your fucking hotel room like a jackass for you. Such a waste. I think this isn't a rage, but it's more of a hypothesis. Okay. So do flat-chested girls fight more often because big-press girls don't need to because they're big to. They do. They tend to get them everything resolved peacefully.

They may not have flat-chested ones. You immediately take into fighting stances. I know this might have no stance or no actual evidence to be like behind it. But I'm glad you're all that from your personal experience. Who fights more flat-chested or big-chested girls? They all fight exactly as much as they can get away with. And it may not be their fighting because they're flat-chested. It could be that they're fighting because they're flat-chested it could be that they're fighting and their flat-chested because of the meth uh... because of the meth yeah uh... good point

good theory it's a good uh... uh... but it's all right fucking you're fine sitting here driving the work

again after what you eat a month of being fucked over about Laura and here we go Delta at least it's not beta. At least you're not getting caught by beta These mother fuckers. All right. Well Whatever, maybe my last voice now. All right. Thank you. Thank you for your voice mails Maybe a couple more. Thank you, Sean. This is Dr. Jirk McCawke here. Quick question.

What do you do when the only jobs you can find in your location are treaty sales jobs or Bullshit manual labor jobs at an email Mexican can Can do at penny little dollar when you've got a Science background hard science background Masses and business Thanks love show, Cheryl. Bye. Move, bitch!

That's what you do. Fuckin' move! Get out of there! Get out of town! Move your ass! Yep, that's the answer. Put some hard science thought into it. Fuckin' move.

Pantificate some locomotion. Yeah. Think on that. All right, let's do one more. All right, one more. Hey, Jake, so, you are correct. Yeah, I think on that all right, let's do one more All right Hey, Jake so you are correct Mm-hmm about

China sending our manufacturing Correct about everything fucking stupid Parted a lot of people over for no good reason whatever balance you're right You're off base in my opinion about you're fishing about the Projection of american military power otherwise that guy that reach out that's not only on about you know there are but

trade which i'm i'm gonna agree different but but the jess of american military power enabled free trade and i mean as you'll free trade i don't know free trade and I mean, national free trade. I don't want free trade.

I don't want free trade. When they can make some stupid widget by paying their people, you know, a couple of nights a day or using a foot waiver and we can have a million regulars. We're just making widgets. What are you making? I don't know, widgets.

Now, what are you making? After World War II, it was the american military the only reason why those kind of sending assholes in europe are able to afford those assholes welfare state which now we have to listen to socialist in this country go on and on about a lot of european

and those kind of sending european cashuggers uh... get to you not have to speak Russian because the Soviets were able to invade. I mean, kind of the... Go fuck yourself. I don't understand what the difference would be. If Russia did take them over, they're all socialist anyway, right?

Well, not Europe is... I don't understand. Not to the same extent. I mean, there's countries... There's a couple bucks. Well, the Europe is like I don't understand not to the same extent. I mean, there's there's Contrater a couple bucks. Well, the countries are there's various degrees of varying degrees of democratic socialism I mean, how much like if we were living in if they we just had the UK as the government right now Would it really be that different living here would yelp would yelp still have racist badges? Probably, yeah, I mean, I don't really yeah America. Yeah different living here would yelp still have racist badges, probably. Yeah.

I mean, I don't really. Yeah, America. Yeah. Independence day. Woo. We kicked off our taxation heavy overlords. Like, well, we're, I mean, they're so what? You go to the UK and you're like, oh, man, it really fucking sucks here.

Yeah. It's so much better in America. What are we set? What are we celebrating? That's what I want to know. Oh, I know. I know. Russia took over Russia and socialism took over all of Europe. What if America had an intervene and Russia would have taken over?

Oh, they'd all be speaking Russian right now. Like I doubt it. Probably just be exactly the same. I mean, what if they, isn't that kind of the whole thing with the Ukraine, like they couldn't indoctrinate them? I don't know though, I'm just talking how I ask. All right, everybody. Have a good one.

See you next Tuesday. See ya.