The Dick Show - Episode 233 - Dick on Venture Communism

Episode Date: November 17, 2020

Meeting the Dogs-Elect, Patty C-cups: Karl's Bananadox, venture communism, money as an abstraction of values, getting set up by mom, weaponized ignorance, Lowtax sells Something Awful, Ticketmaster requires vaccine IDs, a quarter of women don't know where their vagina is, the 5% Work From Home tax, eating inside outside, and national holidays for drug dealers; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Sean, look what I did. I wish you could see this in studio. You got to see what I did here. You see my, my sign Trump hat. He put it in like a case, like a very rare baseball card. Put it in the, on the loose side. No, it's glass. And is it actually glass?

Yes, it's glass. I spared no expense. This is authentic cherry wood, museum quality. You know, that's gonna, my 30 to 30 years, you're gonna be able to sell that for a lot. That's gonna go right up there with like the collection and Nazi plates and all kinds of stuff. Yeah, I'm gonna be the guy at the SWAT meet

that is fortunate. This is suspiciously selling. Like I just have my signed Trump hat behind me at the SWAT meet while I'm selling like, while I'm selling bespoke Stories about Maddox at the swap meet of the future where experience is the only only only good that can be traded anymore I'm gonna have this in the background. I go go go that guy has that signed Trump hat like well, maybe you know Maybe he's just a history buff. No, he's a Nazi.

He's a Nazi. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He just likes, maybe he really likes to into it. Yeah, maybe he really likes what that, what was that country called? Oh, yeah, America. Maybe he really, he's really into American history. No, he's a Nazi. He's one of those Trump Nazis.

He's probably a proud boy. We should go call him a homosexual. He has all those, he has all those Hitler plates. Yeah, he covers that. Cover up that plate from the third round. With a Nazi flag, will you? Okay, here's what we got. Have some decent see.

Have some decent see. Have some damn decent see for once in your life. You're kidding me. No, you guys are actually no nutting Welcome to the egg you want to get you do you like it? You get out of this show where the contest coming to you live from mountain bucket deep in the heart of city If you got me holstick mask and a K the 20 million the other man But her mayor's words Mexican. Maybe three weeks running joining me remotely

but America's wire is Mexican, maybe three weeks running, joining me remotely, remotely, from a studio that is back in time, world touring LA based comedian Sean the audio engineer. Hey, I'm thrilled I can see you. Yeah, I'm thrilled I can see you too. This is gonna feel like a show. I'm thrilled you look like shit too in your remote location.

Although you should call you based LA comedian from now on, so people get your new Twitter account, your new Twitter account. Is that what you've done? God damn you. Yeah. This is going to cause me problem somewhere. Tampa tickets are on sale. Tampa, did you leave that part?

We just, we just did a bonus episode with Carl's, Carl from who are these podcasts? Did you leave my immediate reaction to Maddox trying to cancel Tampa in that show? Yeah. Yeah. I didn't know if you, I didn't know if that made the final cut, but God, God, I was pissed. I don't even know if I want to talk about the specifics yet. I kind of want to wait till we have the Tampa show. That's such a tease though.

Fuckin' hell. Well, if you go listen to the who are these podcast uh... w a t p cross over you can hear it but got i can't i can't but i can't believe he's still going i can't believe after nine months of living under of living under government control of living under lock down of comedians having to eat out of garbage

to get to subside to get by to get by to subsist because they can't perform any longer that and everybody no one's getting laid, no one's getting laid, no one's gavving a laugh. I can't believe after nine months of that, Maddox comes out of the lockdown, still trying to cancel shows. What a fucking lunatic. Yeah, but I can't say more than that. He email the mayor the fucking mayor Can you bill with the same? I mean, it's the same stick white supremacist white supremac motherfucker

I'm not white. I'm not white Stop calling me a white supremacist What in the well, but are you fucking talking to racist? The racist part of you is you do have some in there and it's a, you're half white and it's a, you're a hundred percent racist. It's very strong genes. My half white, he's half white, 100% racist.

God, this racism meme has got to, this racist meme has got to fucking stop. It's got to die. It's got to die. We've got to realize that he's been, he has been obsessing about you every day. That's I think maybe the thing that you're having a tough time believing.

Yeah. Because it's not something that necessarily maybe you recognize in yourself. Like this, you ruined his life and it's eaten at him every, no, every single day and you are, he is singularly focused on you and anything you do that you might get to do something that he can't, that he could never do. And he definitely can't do now. He could do it. Is something to be, man, he could be, he could be named at, he could destroy it. He could sell out, he could sell out Carnegie Hall.

I would go watch him if he just gave, like if he gave one of his fucking Ted talks on film or whatever he, whatever expert he is in the field or just honestly, if he just took questions like from the, I would go, I would pay $200 to go watch that live. I would pay a proper concert price to go watch that live. His TED talks are looking a little more like Ted Kaczynski these days, I think. I think so too. I was supposed to be the crazy one, you know? Oh, I know.

You know, I'm over here, Todd, that we've got, Sean, this might be the last event ever. This might be the last event ever. This might be the last event ever in Tampa, all the, on all these, all the, yes, huge comedians are come, Ryan Long, Danny Paulic, Nick Ricate is going to be there. Carl's going to be there. Ralph, of course, Ralph who got ridden up so many people, Ralph got ridden up as a white supremacist Sympathizer and like a major newspaper recently so Ralph is it you know DC Washington DC is popping off right But but but but but he is though right Isn't isn't he is is that is that a bad thing?

To sympathize with what like if you sympathize like I sympathize with feminists, I think, oh, honey, you just had for your so fat, you had a really bad dad. You got nothing to offer the world, but you're shrieking, but you're shrieking opinions about video games and need to start Keezy and posted this week about Boob armor and the land of Mandalorians, which I mean, yeah, first of all, no one gives a fuck about Star Wars anymore. That body is dead and buried. No, nobody, nobody, and I mean nobody gives a single solitary fuck about it. It's like she's talking about sprite.

Like, wow, diet, this diet. Because I have, go ahead. They have a losing record. I mean, you take all the Star Wars movies, entire the entire franchise. It's way more bad than good. Oh, it's awful. You gotta say that except for the except for the die hards who are got their fingers and they're never gonna. They're never gonna change their stance. Everything is brilliant. Everything was done for the best reason. And that's why it's so brilliant. Some people are gonna defend everything, but everything it's dead and buried. Everything I hear about it is cringe. Is more cringe than her ass talking about it.

And still she says, the Mandalorian women have boob armor. I think like, yeah, that's, I mean, there's like, you can't avoid it. You can't get shot. Yeah, first of all, they have tits. Like they want to have room for their tits and their, you know, like, we have cod pieces. That's real. I mean, second of all, old armor has like Batman suit head nipples. You dumb bitch.

But we are, we put everybody doesn't walk around in a cardboard box. Like the average feminist should because we don't look like grimace. There are definitions to our bodies. We use when, when, when God was designing the body of a non-feminist, he used the Adobe Illustrator tool that lets you sink and anchor and then turn the thing the other way, whatever that took, the bezel the other way.

They go in different directions. If you go back in time, I'm sure you could find that everything that was ever plated to women has tit has a tit area. You stupid cow, but then in the back of my mind, I'm still thinking, oh God, what did society do to you? What did you say? I just, it's were invented in the 1960s. Yes, they were.

So by me telling me that going back to, you know, the, the, the 14th and 15th centuries, then there would have been, there would have been, a lot of men's made. there would have been a lotments made. There would have been space made for the female form. Madison Avenue. I'm having a hard time with this. I need to research this. Madison Avenue invented tits in the 80s to sell Baywatch. I don't know if you knew that.

Before then, everyone was just a shame. That's what likey. Here is Ethan Ralph being called a white supremacist sympathizer. I think he wasn't called a white supremacist. Nick Fuentes of the white nationalist group, Grypers. Jesus Christ promised on parlor. We will like, it makes me rethink. It makes me rethink. Everything I ever heard as a kid when I see this, just black and white on a newspaper of the white nationalist group, the groipers. Oh, God, I mean, I guess.

Never heard of the groipers. What the fuck is a groiper? It's a guy with a little frog as their avatar, like a little fat frog. It's thinking about things. Who? Yeah, we will rally. It's not Pepe though, it's a fat version called groiper, I think.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Groipers are coming to stop this coup. And on Twitter, he called the event Maga Knight at the White House. Ethan Ralph, a white supremacist sympathetic live streamer. Ethan Ralph, a white supremacist sympathetic live streamer. Where was the headbrite supremacist? Has he had known white supremacist on his show? Yes.

Yes. I mean, that's, well, yeah. I mean, I see, I see why they write that. It's not flattering, but he's not, they didn't even call him a sympathizer. They said he was, what did they say? Sympathetic. Livestreamer.

Sympathetic. Well, I guess if you're thinking that, okay, is he giving him a platform? Then, you know, what? He's sympathetic. I don't think Ralph is a, I don't think Ralph is a white supremacist. I think so either.

Oh God, I really, I fucking hate, I hate everything. I really, I feel like I'm Job. Or what was that guy's name in the Bible? And God was like, you know, the guy who God just fucked with and killed his family and pressed his house and gave him, yeah, I feel like this whole thing has been a big trick on God to see if he can whittle away anything that's of any kind of care that's left for the human condition. I think now you know what? No, you took it all. You fucking you took it all with this shit. Somebody

said last week there are somebody said on YouTube that you know when I was I was carrying on about things like endless war and how the government's back in charge and that soon, soon when the federal reserve introduces their global digital currency race will be taxed. Yes. You'll be talking about race. Because what, because money right now is still, God bless it, barely as it is anymore, money is still an abstraction of labor. And in four years, when they, when they digitize the whole thing and have, and have complete

control over every single transaction. When the 100 year plan is complete from income tax to control over every single transaction, money, money will now be an abstraction of your values. And I can't because that's because that's what matters now. It's not the labor anymore. Venture capital, venture capital which is which exists only as a meme and was created by laws that encourage uh... banking speculation through pension funds

and the use of insurance float money which is my premiums that you put into the insurance company that they don't that they do not pay out and they never do insurance of which by the way is mandatory and illegal not to have in the entire United States which they use to fund which they use to disrupt through Silicon Valley apps and companies that roll up small businesses and deposit all of that profit into the into the into the banking oligarchy that is represented by the federal reserve

in the u.s. government that is that is the nature of venture capital and when they have done that money turns from being an abstraction of labor to being an abstraction of values and abstraction of values which is entirely controlled by a centralized entity and i i i i mean i'm you can you can see it i can see it clear as fucking day that this was the plan from the beginning and i'm somebody commented on youtube that while i was screaming about that last week you could watch video and hit like you could watch them slowly die inside and go

oh god that is what i voted for the government is back in charge they are going back to war and nothing will be lifted. The National Mask mandate will be here for fucking ever and it will be brought to us by ticket master who will now be requiring vaccines but they'll be requiring a vaccine card to attend an event and I've forgot sake if they're having trouble rolling it out, I'm sure that TSA will be happy to help them, because they've been gearing up for it for 20 years.

So I take a step back and look at all of this. I look at all of this and think, God, you win. I have no more, I have no more, I have, I don't have the ability to care for it anymore. To care for these people who've done this willingly and Excitedly who are celebrating in the fucking streets that the that the that the government is back in charge And they're saying that I don't know. I thought it was funny. They're like, oh, yeah You can see him literally you can see him hearing and going oh god

Maybe it wasn't about maybe it wasn't about keeping this guy who's funny but kind of a goof and a buffoon in charge. Maybe it really was for some people about prolonging the inevitability of the inevitability of the blood from stone squeezing machine, the dead curve, the laffer curve eviscerating shredder. amazing machine, the dead curve, the laffer curve, eviscerating shredder. That is the combination of the corporateocracy, the government bureaucracy and the shadow pecking institutions that run our fucking lives from taking over completely for another four years. Maybe, maybe, I didn't have that, I don't know, I've been thinking a lot this week. I can tell. I saw, even, yeah, maybe even not talking a lot. You're I can tell. Hi, son. Yeah, I've been. Maybe even not talking a lot.

You're really, you're really on a roll today. Because you can see it, you can see it clear as say. It's just the money will have the abstraction of labor that money is supposed to be. Value of goods, okay, well you don't need value of goods. Okay, it's still an abstraction of labor. Now it's a fucking abstraction of values. The same way I said, all future advertising

will be virtue signaling. You remember I said that like six years ago, five years ago when the show first started. Well, yeah, and they did that, that Kylie Jenner thing or whatever, that was almost like a test. Yeah. What was that like Kylie Jenner and Pepsi or something?

Or was that what it was? Yeah, and now they can go. Now they're locking down the platforms themselves so that they can only be virtuous to successfully advertise them. I feel like I'm becoming Alex Jones. There's no other way to look at it. Like now I just see, I see the money being siphoned out

of people and they don't understand why. Well, you know, at least we can, that's not Rush Limbaugh, well we can always have hope in our country of America. Like, are you fucking insane? Am I the only person in the world that understands math anymore? No, fuck.

No, no, no, no. I think a lot of people are hopeless. They might not be able to articulate it in the way that you are. And I'm sure that they yell less. Yeah. I've thought about it for years. I mean, even going back to, even going back to W, you could just see the corporateocracy really happen.

And companies really don't go up. It just seems to have just, it's on a curve that is just skyrocketing. I mean, we've got, we have voting machines. We have a private entity running, but like the, you know, not a sane person cannot look at these voting machines and say, oh yeah, well, you know, they're probably good. I mean, you know, I don't know. Who knows? Who knows how they work?

Let's put it that way. But as long as they get the job done, like, well, how do you know that they, do you audit any source code? Is any like, is any central, is it, do they work like in any way that the computers that keep Amazon running? Are they, those are open source? the computers that keep Amazon running are they those are open source are these those Operating that's all fucking open source is anything open source is anybody looking at this fucking data Can we get an expert in here please then low and behold the inventor of email? Do you do you know that this man exists? You know who this guy is?

She does something this guy's fucking inventing an email. MIT, PhD from MIT, loads up, loads up the results from the voting machine, she says, yeah, wow, these trends that I'm seeing are fucked. The trends from these things are completely fucked. This you would never see, and he goes through it. He tries to explain it like a professor would. I don't, I didn't even want to get political this. We got other stuff today.

Do you want to meet the new dogs? The new dogs, the new dogs elect. Do you want to meet the dogs elect? They're moving into the White House show. Oh, with the first dogs. Do you want to meet the first dogs? Do you want to meet the first? I would love to.

Do you want to meet Biden's fucking dogs? Here, you fucking morons to anything. Do you want to meet Biden's fucking dogs? Here you, here you fucking morons to anything. Do you want to meet the dogs? Do you want to meet the dogs that are moving into the White House? I wanted to kill myself. I saw that pop up six times on every device I own. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, as if they were rolling it out at the same time. As if they were broadcasting a secret message to me.

Do you want to meet the dogs elect six times on my phone from every news organization popping up on my fucking computer? It was like I had seen a ghost of Christmas future. Why go ahead? What are you? You asked me like six times. Are you gonna fucking show me the dogs or not? I'm serious. give me the dogs.

I can't, I blocked the dogs. I don't want to see the dog, I don't care. I wanted to, it's propaganda. It's stram, I mean, that's what it looks like. Like, that's what propaganda looks like. Do you want to meet the dogs? You're gonna get a dog. Select.

Hey, everybody, hey, America, you value family, you've like dogs, right? And your family, family and the nuclear family, well, here you go. Here's your new dog. Go ahead and meet him. Are you guys, how can you do this, this blatantly? Congratulations. The work at home tax is coming.

Have you seen this? No. No? What do you mean no? You didn't know how? No, I hadn't seen the work at home tax. There's something new that's on. Sean, Sean, Sean.

Are they calling it, what are they calling it a, a fee? Uh, I don't, I don't know what they're calling it. Deutsche Bank says workers should pay a 5%, uh, privilege tax to work from home after COVID as brightening vaccine prospects tease a return to pre pandemic normalcy and employers map out when and how remote workers return to the office. And unless it doesn't love people, don't want to go back. I mean, doich argues that remote workers contribute less to the economy's infrastructure while still receiving its benefits and says that a fine because they

don't use gas going to and from work, I guess, because they're not, because they're not driving a contained explosion machines that are date that should be quite frankly should be illegal for anyone to drive. If you want to talk about danger, yes. Yeah. Since, you know, since we're all into the ant, since we're all into the anti-death game, driving should definitely be illegal and will be one, I mean, the second that the self-driving car is take over the truck industry, those, it'll be, it won't be driving drunk,

it will be driving. That will be the great, that will be a disgusting social. You will have to sit. If you're, if you're auto-drive or whatever breaks down, you're going to have to sit in your car and drive with your knees and just stretch and like pretend to be working and other things to get around. Yeah. I mean, you know, around here, I'm not sure that's a terrible thing, but you know what driving's like. A 5% tax on individuals levied against their wages on days they decide to work remotely would leave them no worse off than

if they had chosen to go into the office. No, because of that, it says the cost off. So why, don't, don't let them save any money. Just, just let them distribute it somewhere else. It's my money. It's your money. The attitude, the attitude is the, the fucking, the engineering, the attitude is the fucking, the engineering, the engineering that they presume to have, that they do have control over is staggering. It's so, it's staggering to me. They're saving, it's, we're used to getting a certain amount of money, so we're going to get it one way or another. It would leave them no worse off than

if they had you mean you wouldn't you don't get to take more of what I mean. It's so fucking shocking. And and this is this is a hundred percent. There'll be a 100% capable of doing this with essential bank cryptocurrency. As for the basis of the argument, the bank says working from home is financially rewarding thanks to direct financial savings on expenses such as commuting clothes and lunches. Well, you don't have to, you can make your own lunch. Why should you enjoy going to lunch?

Everything's shut down anyway. Why would you want to go eat at a breeding ground for vi-ray and bacteria as well as indirect savings from things like reduced work related socializing. Oh, Deutsche Bank. I can't take it. Good times, good times.

Oh, I can't. I can't fucking take it. I cannot, I would, I would, I would be terrified if I was between the ages of 20 and 30 right now. Yeah, yeah, I was born 30 years too late. 30 years too late, when I didn't. 30 years too late.

Well, I should have been around for the 60s music and I should have, you know what I mean? I should be, you know, I should be 70 something years old by now. Yeah, I just, you know, it starts, I want to be beginning with it. I've got too much time left. I got too much time left.

They did. If you were alive back in, you got in at the beginning of the pyramid scheme with the getting off the gold standard starting printing money in the junk bond. Yeah, the bond. Yeah, I mean, free sex. I should be my dad's age, maybe a little older. Free sex, never getting arrested.

The gains generally outweigh the costs of working from home, such as the stress of juggling work and children at home are an imperfect home office setup. So they're going to use your own money to force you go back to go back to work because they can't because the economy because the banks can't stand the foreclosure of commercial industry is the collapse of the commercial industry. That sounds like exactly what's happening. Oh, it's a perfect sense for them to do that. Yeah. Oh, well, thanks, guys.

Thanks for looking out. Let's see what I'll say ahead here. I can't wait to pay it. I can't wait to do my part. They're setting up wedding tents for you to, as the weather drops, they're setting up wedding tents across the country outside, so that you don't eat, because you can't eat inside, but you can eat inside if the inside is outside.

So yeah, wedding tents, wedding tents, which are not ventilated at all, right? Well, because they, they kind of close all the way to the ground, don't they? Or are they not going to have them close all the way to the ground? I don't know. It's fucking freezing. So there's going to be, so what the entire winter is going to be spent in wedding tents outside, like we're living in Oliver Twist, looking inside at empty buildings, trying to juggle, getting a heat lamp blasted against your, your, your receding hairline.

That is going to be the winter. When biting says it's a dark winter, it's because we will spend the winter having heat lamps blasted at our bald spots and our receding hairlines in wedding tents. I don't know, maybe we could, I don't know what is a, it's like the gun argument,

when does it become a building? When does the outside become inside once again? Like is there, does there have to be no wood in the structure? Right. I don't know. Well, I would say it would have to exist on a more or less permanent foundation.

Okay. Not easily, that's, I guess that's really the real estate definition, the difference between real property and personal property is that real property cannot be easily moved. Okay. So as long as you can easily move it, like you can't bolt it to the ground.

Like, like, no, like an above ground spa, no matter how big it is, that's personal property. An in ground spa is not. Okay, I see, that makes sense. Let me see what else I have here. I got, yeah, I was thinking about those voting machines. I tried to get Vito was hooking me up with this emulator thing to play video games on,

to play old school video games. Cause I'm just gonna pretend it's 1985 from now on. And when I get to the 90s, I'm just gonna start over. Back to the future. Yeah. I'm gonna pretend it's 1980 and when I get to 1990, I'm gonna start over again. And I'm sorry, generation of Z, but that's how you're going to live your entire, your

lives until you're 40. We had to do it. We had to pretend that it was Norman Rockwell's fucking Christmas. We had to listen to, you know, Bing Crosby's Christmas hits our whole lives. So you're going to have to do that too now. Sorry to tell you. I was looking at these emulators and just to do basic Nintendo games, old school and video games, there's about 10 million settings, right? So

much so I said, that's a lot of settings. Yeah, every single piece and I so much I said, you know what, I'm just, I'm not gonna, I don't want to bother with it. There's nothing, no, nothing more frustrating than having to learn something, just to enjoy something. I'm not willing to learn things to do video games. I'll learn, I'll learn something, like making bullets, making ammo. I'll learn, that's enjoyable to me to make some ammo. I'll learn a lot of stuff to do that because you can't buy the shit anymore, but video games is not one of those things. but it's got me thinking, how is there, it got me thinking on the election machines. There are at least this many settings

on this fucking thing. And there is no way, there was no way Rachel the retard who is running the electronic voting system has a handle on fucking any of them. It is, it's shocking to me that we let the electric voting systems happen is what I'm saying. It's fucking shocking. And we just let it go through in the middle of the night. Well, I don't know. There's hand recounts too. I mean, but you know those voting, those voting machines shred the original ballots. They like turn it or do they?

I've read things. I gotta go ahead. I gotta look into that. No, no, no, I just, I've got to look up. I read things that they get some of them or there's a setting to get rid of the original ballot. There is a, the numbers are not given in votes, but on percentages, like it doesn't give you a raw number of votes. It just gives you, it gives you a factor of who is winning, like out of a hundred. It is the most, it is, like I feel like there's gotta be more,

there's gotta be more information to that. Like so many things, it is put together as every and every programmer will tell you this, any good one will tell you this, that when you look at something and assume that it works that way, it doesn't. They built it the dumbest possible way you could bend it. It's every fucking time if you inherit any kind of project

You think oh god. Why did you do it this way? Why did why does it work this way? What this is a simple this is a simple thing that you've That you've totally destroyed with this asinine way you're doing it by having 10 million settings and I strongly suspect that this is Well, I hope we find out one day that the voting machines have fallen under that, but fuck, I don't know, man. I don't know. Let's see. Women, a quarter of women don't know where their vagina is.

Did you know that? Go on. This is a, this is a study. I love your headlight. This is a, this is a study. I love your headlight. Because you reflect, you reflect the news sites so well. This is what they said. I gotta click on that.

You always do that. Yeah, it's, it's really good. It's really good. It said, let me pull up the thing. 25, a quarter of women in America don't know where their vagina is. I mean, I'm not surprised. They know where the Doritos are though. I'll tell you that. I got to know more. You could put a woman in a house she's never been in the dark in a blindfold

and she'll find the snacks within 10 seconds. She'll sniff them out. New poll and U.S. They don't know the word, the vagina. They don't know what it is. Do they just have another name for it? Oh, like Front Hall, do you think? Yeah, like I mean, like 100% of women know where that thing is. Oh, they call it something different.

Like they call it a hoo-hoo or something. Right. Right. According to the survey that pulled 2000 women, 46% could not identify the cervix. And more than half asked identified the uterus as a different part of the body. Well, I don't, I'm never going to listen to a woman say that men don't know where the clitoris is ever again. If a quarter of them don't even know where their fucking vagina is, the fact that nearly

one in four women's in the survey misidentified the vagina. 46% that makes sense though, doesn't it? A quarter of people are retarded. Yeah, women are not exact from that. You know, I think probably more than a quarter. The cervix says we need to keep educating the public about how the reproductive system it's monthly processes and hormonal changes can impact a woman's life. No, that's not what that means.

That means a quarter of, That means a quarter of women should be put into some kind of a zoo. It does not mean that we need more education for where is your pussy. It means that we need to identify you. So everybody knows that you, it means that we need to raise, like it means that while we're okay, you know what? We're cock, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll use the women's bathroom. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we're gonna use the women's bathroom, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, sure, sure, we play women's sports, whatever, I don't care. But we on our side, on the normal man side,

the cuties, the cuties side, the political party of the cuties, which are, no, no, no, no, I established this on YouTube, but when I was driving to Arizona that the cuties party is running boogie as our presidential candidate in 2024 and Frank Hasill as the vice president in 2024. Start leveling accusations of QDs, you know, sympathizing. QDs, the QDs political party, QDs, you're the, you're a pedophile. That's our political party model.

You're a pedophile. QDs. You're a pedophile. Vote QDs. You're, if you don't, You're a pedophile. Cuties. You're a pedophile. Vote cuties. You're, if you don't, you're a pedophile. Um, right. We, but we are gonna raise, the, we are gonna change the definition

of what a retarded person is. You guys can have, you can have, yeah, women change it to whatever you want, play in the women's sports, but we get, we own the word retarded, and we're gonna change it and it's gonna include a lot more people when we're done with it, including these women.

Well, yeah, I think there should be, I think there should be, you know, a series of questions that you can ask people that kind of cover all of our life. Ethnicity, income brackets, gender, whatever, like a sexual orientation, any of that stuff. That basically, so basically at least 25% of people just kind of end up in zoos one way or another through a series of questions.

Carl from who are these podcasts here? Let me bring him in. Hey, Carl, are you there? Oh, cool. Hey, hey, what are you? Yeah, I don't want to make you wait too long because we're trying to figure out how women don't know where their pussy's are.

You wear that? That's good to take a while. 25% of women don't know where their vagina, a quarter of those replied, oh yeah, here we go, one thought periods got rid of bacteria. Another had a similar idea saying that periods are detoxification, I guess so.

A quarter of those asked, replied with, it's the process, a woman's body goes through Heather had a similar idea saying that periods are detoxification. I guess so. A quarter of those asked, replied with, it's the process, a woman's body goes through to shed excess blood. That's amazing. These are fucking priceless. Excess blood. You thought that you thought that- You got too much blood.

Women, they just have a build up of blood all month, and then once a month, they shoot it all out of their cuts that's what a period is god damn it and this and we have guys worried that women will think he's lying if he's under six feet tall they probably don't even know what a foot is they they probably don't even understand that it's like an additive distance of measurement uh... more than half sixty three% were able to offer the correct explanation. Oh, that's, that's generous more than half. That was like, that was like bragging.

No, more than 63%. We're able to go fucking, that's just great. Uh, knowledge was also severely lacking when it came to menopause with 13% thinking menopause was missing a period amazing. Yeah, I guess you missed. Oh my God. You missed one and then the other and then I'm having a job having a menopause right now. And 13% thinking it was to do with turning 40. Yeah, nailed it. Around one in the three of the women and bodies like up calendar, perfect. Around one in three of the women in the poll blamed their teachers for the gaps in their

knowledge on their reproductive organs. Man, I don't know if I'm gonna say another quarter blamed religious organizations, 27% blamed the government. Okay. They told them they were wrong and that said why were you wrong about this? They had a big on a stick. Yeah, who's the president? 28%

28% blamed their failings, blame their parents for their failings. Did any of them blame themselves? Why don't you know what menopause is? Why didn't you Google it? You fucking bitch. At this point, yeah. At this point, there's no excuse for not knowing information like that. Oh my God, you fucking idiots.

Half of Britain's could not identify or describe the function of the Yerithra. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Do they have a narrow urethra? Do you think they wanted to meet the dogs elect? Do you think that that half was really interested in meeting Biden's fucking dogs? Stop saying that if you're not going to show me. Half of Britain's cannot identify the labia or the vagina. Oh God. Oh God. You got to be fucking 41% of men being able to do. Oh God.

Carl, how you doing? I'm doing awesome, man. This is a fun show today. I'm so pissed off. Maybe keeping a show out of the studio is a good thing for you. I'm just so, I'm so Alex Jones, amped up. You know what? If we're riding with biting for four years, I'm gonna ride it straight into the fucking ground.

It's great, I don't have to apologize for the what the government does anymore. It's fucking great. Oh, what about this government keeps kids in cage? Yeah, because they're evil. That's my response now. Don't you know that? Oh, why did Trump kill this guy in Iran?

Well, you know, I mean, it turned out to be a pretty good idea. I could kill that guy. It's a little dicey for me, but this is what he did. And this, well, now it's just fucking, because they're evil. Fuck you. I don't know what you, this is all you are fucking fault now. You voted for him, you dumb motherfucker.

I haven't felt this feeling in a long time. It's great. Did you see Lizzo wrapped in an American flag, Tarp? I haven't I haven't felt this feeling in a long time It's great Did you see Lizzo wrapped in an American flag tarp? Do you guys see that? No, no here see if you can see if you can pull this up Oh, by the way, Dr. Fanucci says that we still have to wear masks and socially distance even after the vaccine I know if you heard that I would recommend to people not to abandon all public health measures just because you've been vaccinated.

Fennuchi told CNN, tape-tap her on bleb-la, because even though for the general population, it might be 90 to 95% effective. You don't necessarily know for you how effective it is. Jesus fucking Christ! So then what's the point? Yeah, well, that's, that's very, very conservative, obviously. Yeah, 95% would be amazingly effective.

Well, that's, you know, because the flu vaccines are generally not that effective. Let's put it this way. If I'm vaccinated, I'm not wearing a mask anymore. I feel like, I feel pretty confident. Well, Dr. Hill pretty damn confident. Now, if it was 40%, that's another thing. But the fact that the fact that you have a 99% chance of surviving doesn't plan. Dr. Fanucci says that the independent spirit of Americans has gotten in the way of the, and that it's time for us to just listen. What? Did you see that?

Americans has gotten in the way of the, and that it's time for us to just listen. Or did you see that? Well, Americans definitely do not like being fucking told what to do, like ever. Like, yeah. And then this is, this is a direct quote from him from, from Fno Chi. I can understand that. Uh, we have an independent spirit. I can't understand it. But now is the time to do what you're told.

Holy fuck! Now is the time to do what you're told. Told while Congress has a cattillion while Congress has a fucking dinner to welcome in their new members to their, they've got a new, this, in their marble dining hall wave. They've got a whole little special dinner for, so they can, so they can prepare to rape us for the next. It's so disgusting. Anyway, Carl, can we talk about Patty's seat cups, please?

Yeah, I would. Yes, instead of this shit. We did it. Dick and I, John, we all did a crossover episode this past week and we focused on two podcasts, do you party and the briefcase, both of these shows hosted by one Patrick Michael who hosts a lot of podcasts and is fascinating. He's great. He's really nice. He's a girl and I really love him now. She's like, God, I really want to listen to more of that guy's show. Where is his Patreon? I want people to support him on Patreon. This Patreon is Patreon.com slash pod culture. Yeah, pod culture. So he's, he's

prolific, right? Like he cranks out hundreds of podcasts, there are dozens at a time, picks them up, runs with them, runs them is the ground. This is amazing about this guy. He's the worst marketer to ever exist because he cranks out new shows all the time and you can't find him. He's gonna put his name on him. They're not centrally located somewhere. Yeah. So let me just read a short list of podcasts that he's been the host of.

Do you party? The briefcase chewed gum, nine minute podcasts, less than 10, tell some of trailer park, American crimes, dead town, after PM problem academy, aggravated our crimes and movies. You've got murder. Is it the shoes, breakfast, dessert, ginger snap podcast? These are just some of the podcasts. This guy has made in the last year. And he's horrible at it.

And he's also a huge, like entitled asshole. Like he's ungrateful to people who listen to him. He's entitled to an audience that he does not have. Everybody who's better than everybody who's more successful than him to him, he's entitled to an audience that he does not have. Everybody who's better than everybody who's more successful than him is like, he's somehow undeserving of it or doesn't work hard. Right. It's like listening to a fat chick. It's like listening to an embittered fat chick talk about, yeah.

But he's so entertaining because of that. He's really so entertaining because of that because we all have that in us like that sick jealousy that we're not allowed to express. And he just openly embraces it and is a failure. So it's, I don't it's beautiful. His whole thing is quantity over quality. And he even comes out and says that I'm going to play a clip for you, deck about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it.

I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it.

I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it.

I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk that. He starts up the show by saying, I thought he's probably going to suck. Just wanted to make you guys aware. Why would you start a show like that? God. His do you party. It was like 14-year-olds making a podcast about drinking. Yes. Like I thought, yeah, anyway, go ahead, please. So what's happening with Patrick Michael right now, what we've documented on the show that we did this past week is he's starting to get some notoriety,

because like you said, there's something about him that's captivating, and there's a growing audience of people who are listening to him on purpose now. It used to be a goof. If you go to our Discord, who are these podcasts discord? We have a channel in there called Shamest Watch because the guy is also goes by Shamest McKillian, Patty Seacups. Patty Seacups was his party name. Yeah. Cause Bobby Bitch

Tits was not subtle enough. There it is. So it's amazing because what's happening to him now is he's getting all of these followers and he doesn't know how to handle it. Let me just play this clip where he's talking about that. It's my own judgment, okay, but I'm sitting in a situation where I'm getting a bunch of new followers and what have you. People messaging me, telling me they like the show, whether you're saying something negative or saying something positive, it's hard to tell. Because somebody could be like, yeah, man,

I love your show. Only to set me up to say something back to them. And I don't know, make fun of it. I don't know, I don't know what they would do. He's super paranoid that nobody actually likes him and everyone's just goofing out of him. So when people reach out to him, if they send him a DM or if they email him, he just assumes

that their assholes making fun of him, which is hilarious. Is it paranoia if he's right? But it's also his way of saying constructive criticism is just done to hurt him. He interprets constructive criticism as a trick. Like, hey, I love you show, but it would be nice if you did this, like, oh, that guy tricked me into getting criticized. Well, we should point out that he was invited

to come on the DIC show, and not only did he turn it down, but he was angry that he got the envy. Yeah. See how dare you think that I would go on the show to promote my show? You want more listeners or not? What are you doing? Why are you podcasting?

Like, you don't understand, we like you. I like that you exist. Like it's the same with Maddy Locks. I just wish Maddy Locks would stop calling fucking venues and trying to get our shows canceled. Yeah, there's that. He or she would continue making content, but stop trying to fuck up our content.

So Dick, I'm gonna play a clip right now, and this is from about two weeks ago. We didn't talk about this on Wednesday night when we talked about parody seekups. He actually went on and invited people to reach out and communicate with them. But yeah, man, feel free to create some dialogue. BriefcasePod, or thugbriefcaseatgmail.com, But uh, yeah man feel free to create some dialogue briefcase pod

Or the briefcase at gmail.com always willing to talk Okay, always That's why I do this. He's always wanted to talk to his listeners. That's why he does a podcast Now you guys know this because you already heard the episode only doesn't tell people not to communicate with him to shut the fuck up As in this example and then he goes in comments on my episode about Bigfoot So all he does is tell people not to communicate with him to shut the fuck up as a misexample. And then he goes and comments on my episode about Bigfoot. And, you know, whatever. But also shut up, you know, like I don't,

I'm not looking for dialogue. I don't do the podcast so I can talk to the- So angry. It doesn't make sense for you to assume that I want some sort of conversation with you when I do a podcast by myself. We're not assuming it. You actually invited it two weeks ago.

You said contact me. Here's my email address. I know he's pissed people are contacting him. I don't think he expected anyone to ever actually reach out to him. No, he has listeners. He does not know how to handle it. It's hilarious. I wonder what his ideal interaction was.

I know Maddox's ideal male is someone saying that they were going to kill themselves and that they didn't because of his show. And then here's the picture of my tits. That's his, that's the only fan male he wants to get. I wonder what Patrick Michaels is. Well, I don't think he knows because he's got so much cognitive dissonance. I know I've been using this word about Patrick a lot, but it's amazing because he'll say one thing and then the exact opposite immediately after he says that thing, he doesn't

even make sense of it in his own brain, which is why he can't communicate it. Yeah. Well, no, he doesn't know who he is in any way, shape or form. That's the thing. Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point.

Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, that's a famous. He wants to be famous on his terms. And the fact that he's popular, but for the wrong reasons, he's popular because I talk about him almost on a weekly basis. I can't get enough of him. But he says he doesn't care about everything he does. And he still wonders. He wants to be famous, but he does things he doesn't care about. He says he doesn't care about them. And then he's angry when he's angry when people likes's angry when people like, it's like, yeah,

no, shit, you're angry because you're not that person, you idiot. So he does care about it because he gets angry. There's the answer. Yeah. Oh, whenever somebody says that they don't care about something, I get, I hear this all the time. They'll bring up that we were making fun of them, but yeah, this podcast, sorry about us, I don't care about it though.

The definition of not caring about it is that you don't even talk about. I'm commenting. A lot of things I don't care about. I never bring them up on my shop. Yeah. I remember when you made fun of us, I was like, what the fuck is this guy talking about? I couldn't have cared harder, Carl. You were actually really funny about it. You told me that we should make our show into

a contest. I didn't even, I didn't even know he made fun of us. That's how a little I care. That's how we know Carl, because he made the episode where Mr. Fancy Pants was on and the whole, how do you piss argument came up? Carl made fun of that episode. Isn't that right, Carl?

You made fun of that episode. So in your show. Yeah, so. That's correct, yeah. Somebody reached out and told me, I gotta review the dick shows before I ever heard you guys before. Yeah, I didn't even know about the biggest problem in the universe. Yeah, so I just came in, I think it was like episode 77 or something like that of the

dick show. And coming in cold, it's hard to understand the fuck is going out. It's impossible, because it's a Mexican telenovela this show. That's why. Yeah, I only get about 40% every week. I believe that. Sean knows more about animals. He knows about the show that he's on.

I do. Yeah, that's true. I do have animal facts. That is true. Sean. Okay. Did you want to talk, Dick, at all, about this do you party? Do you have clips from that? God, let me see if I have any leftover clips.

You know, I had a clip problem. Yeah, because we both pulled so many clips. I ate over 30. you had a ton. So we left a lot on the board this past week, because there was just too much I got to. We also, while you're looking for that, I'll just say, if you go on the W-A-T-P Patreon or on Dix, you can get this episode. We went through another three chapters of fuck whales, Mattias's failed book, because humor less.

It's getting sad. It's getting sad. He's trying to be funny. He really phoned those last couple. Oh boy. Let me see if I have any. I do have a lot. And so Fist had to say, these guys do not party. Yeah.

Oh, he was great. He goes, what was the last big party that you were at? And the guy goes, my wedding. I really did it up, but it's weird to hear like a guy, because he is, the more I think about it, he is just like a real Borat. Like Borat just sells, sells this idea that you have to tolerate this foreigner and Americans are all very tolerant. So they will and like kind of help him along with this thing.

But Patty C. Cups is this lame and people kind of help him along with this thing by acting that lame. It's a very hilarious, practical joke that he's playing on people and they don't even know it. You know what, let's see, do you host parties or you, I've got girls stuffing their bras. This is from Patty C. Cups. That grand bother whiskey. Who had hair on your chest, boy?

What, I am 12. Exactly, yeah. But I will take some hair on your chest, what? I am 12. Exactly, yeah. But I will take some hair on my chest, please. Whatever I gotta do, you know, you feel like at that point, please. Yes, please, yeah. All right, you know, that's the shame, dude. How come girls when they get that age and they don't grow boobs, they can stuff tissues into their shit to make it look like all of our own, your puberty and no one can make

money, but yet all of us that don't get facial hair at a young age, we're like, we can't just, we can't get dad's shavings from the bathroom and tape it onto our chest, we like check it out. Is that a real, is that like a common problem to guys want to know? You guys want to pretend to have facial hair when they're 12? Also, that clip reminds me of something that I pointed out a number of times. This guy's in his 30s and he talks about high school and elementary schools if it was like last

year. Yeah. He's done nothing in his life since that. He has no stories to tell. He's got nothing going on. Yeah, he doesn't. Oh God, I don't know. I think that's enough of Patrick Michael for me. I don't know. That's a good tease, right? Yeah, that is a good tease. So you're coming to Tampa as well, right? Oh my God, I can't wait. This better not get shut down, man. I'm nervous with all these new regulations and shit

that are going on. Dude, I really think it's gonna be the last show. Like when Biden gets in, I think there's gonna be no more shows or you'll have to show an ID that you're vaccinated to get into every venue that ticket master controls. No, no idea to vote, but if you want to go watch, you know, a if you want to go watch a Queen's Reich, you definitely have to have a medical, medical fucking ID to go see that. Yeah, did you did you buy buy Queens right ticket somehow? No.

No, I don't know. Fuck did you come up with Queens right? You don't know. Don't you remember he says go bet to that D-D-5? Yeah. You just said that. Yeah, I'm going back. Okay.

If you want to go Z-Wine, if you want to go watch my dad's, cover my dad's, Kink's cover band, you'll need to show some ideas here. Voting, nah. No, this, this Tampa show is gonna be amazing. I'm really excited about it. We gotta figure out, I'm planning on bringing video that we can watch like Maddie Lachs or watch Banana Docs. Okay.

We can plot it. Oh good, good, good. The audience, that's great. Here's something that just happened. Airbnb, anyone, good. The audience. That was great. Here's something that just happened. Airbnb, anyone, they banned, this is their statement. The guy got kicked off of Airbnb and got his reservation canceled because he was going to that DC march.

And I guess he's a proud boy. I don't know. I don't really think that matters. Airbnb says anyone affiliated with hate groups has no place on Airbnb. We've identified the reservation canceled it and banned the user from our platform, a platform that they created by taking the mom and pop business of renting your shit out

and usurping it with venture capitalists. Venture capitalism, the main created by the government and the federal reserve uh... to trick you into thinking that it's that it's a risky and that it's capitalist when it is neither that is that the communist one and that is that is their pride enjoys venture capitalism uh... congratulations anyway anyone who thinks that communists are wearing all black and fighting in

the street is wrong uh... the communists are wearing all black and fighting in the street is wrong, the communists are running the government and they are running Silicon Valley and they have taken every, they have taken every possible way for you to make money and put it into an app. Thank you, Airbnb for that. Dick, I have somebody here who has, has been listening to your show and has a comment about what you've been saying. You're fucking all about this shit.

Yeah. I mean, did you see, so Tim Allen, this also fucking pissed me off. Tim Allen comes out and says something about communism and Karl Marx, and I see people against him saying, weren't you the guy that was caught with like a pound and a half cocaine? And I'm thinking, wait a minute.

Wait a minute. So now the left is anti-drug. Now you're the side of, now you're the side of we need to go to war in Syria. We need to stay in Afghanistan and it's bad to be caught with cocaine. Have I lost my fucking, I guess that's awesome that Tim Allen was caught with cocaine. He's providing a valuable service for many Americans That's something to think but they should be if they if war veterans have to memorial day and veterans day drug dealers Should have ten fucking days off. There should be a drug for there should be a day for every fucking drug that we have a National fucking holiday then I think it was veto said yeah, but he narked on everybody

I'm like, why why would you not narc? Why would you go to jail for your fucking co-workers? What universe am I living in that everything that basic rights and liberties have been so flipped over but you liberals are supposed to be pro-freedom. You motherfuckers. Did you forget that? Did you forget that to win an argument on Twitter, Jesus Christ.

Go ahead. I love when you had your rap with Gila. win an argument on Twitter, Jesus Christ. Go ahead. When you had your rap with girl, somebody else say something. I've got more about women. Some of his dumb bitch said that Trump was only talking to Trump. Trump was only being nice to her to have sex with her. Let me see. That one. Claudio Jordan says Trump was only nice because he wanted to sleep with her. No, no fucking shit you moron. That's the only reason we think about you at all. What the fuck, what the fuck kind of bubble

are you, are these hot chicks living in where that is a, if there was a women's university, that would be every single one of their dissertations and every single one would get a standing ovation. You know what, this guy was only nice to me to fuck me. Yeah, is this, no wonder you guys don't know where your pussy's are, you don't know what they're fucking for. Would that be a headline with anybody else's name in it?

You'd be the laughing, so who would put it out of the article like that? Trump should have said, you know what, she only, she was only talking to me because I happen to be a fucking billionaire. I don't know how many nice guys who's out there ignoring. All right, Carl, I think low tax is going to call in. Does anything make you a rage? Yes. What? Arbitrary COVID regulations, Dick. Oh, my God. So bad. Did you know that in New York state you can have live music, but you can't promote it. You can have a band at your venue, but you can't tell people the band will be at your venue before they have. Okay. All right. That's a big deal. Wow. In California, when you have

gatherings, you can't sing. You can have instrumental bands, but the band can have members from more than three households in it, and wind instruments are discouraged. Why? Because it's a spit. So, I know that. Because of the spit valve. You have to empty the spit valve. Give them a new sum. Yes, the guy who's all about data and science thinks the saxophones are killing people.

People have killed themselves after Kenny G concerts. And then he just had like a big, he just had a big gathering in Napa Valley or something. Did you see that? Newsom just got busted having this big gathering up in Napa. He had busted going to dinner. Yeah, something like that. Yeah. Two weeks ago in New York state, all restaurants had a closet midnight.

Now it's 10 p.m. because that's gonna make a difference. Like this whole idea that we're closing things early is gonna stop the spread of COVID makes zero sense. That's that one restaurants are busy. They're not busy from 10 until midnight. Yeah. One of the regulations that they had back in March

with our awesome governor Cuomo was that nursing homes had to take COVID positive patients in. Yeah, or else they'd lose their money. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. And that spread COVID. Yeah, that. Yeah. Thousands of people. I killed more people than 9.11. Yeah. Cuomo killed more people than than been lot in. And probably so. Yeah. Yes. Yeah, because it ripped through, fucking nursing homes, they're like a wildfire. Where's SEAL team six when you need them? Last thing here, because it's just so arbitrary.

So you can get together and you could be in a restaurant and you can have all the people in there. But you can't have a comedian on the stage telling joke, stand up comedy right now is illegal in all of New York state, which crazy is people started, people started going to the park. In Central Park, they would start doing stand up. They banned that.

So it just poofs. Wow. But they're just starting to make people miserable. That's the ethical. This is not about the spread of COVID, it's not about our safety. They want people to be miserable and it's working. Congratulations, Andrew Cole. Well, they got their mail-in vote. I saw a judge said that Newsom's order to do mail-in

voting was illegal. So I think it's going to be hilarious. I think the next 45 days is going to be hilarious. I don't think people realize that it's not all this like numbers and voting shit doesn't matter. All that matters is that Trump can convince the legislature that there was fuckery with the voting systems. Like all he has to do, I mean, all that matters is that Trump can convince the legislature that there was fuckery with the voting systems. Like all he has to do, I mean, all he has to do is produce a hockey stick graph and say, see, look at this. See how this doesn't make sense?

So go ahead. I mean, pick electors with your conscience, how your conscience dictates. I think it'll be hilarious. I hope it gets really dicey because I'm perfectly safe in my bunker. Hey, real quick. Can I just do a little Tony from hack the movies thing right now? Yeah, sure. Yeah, go ahead.

All right, sweet. Not only am I co-host or the host of a who are these podcasts, but I also co-host a show called The Creepop with Vinny Paulino. And what we do is we bring on a creep. There's a theme every week. We have to talk about a creep. But coming up this week is truckers. We have to bring in the biggest creep. There's a theme every week. We have to talk about a creep. Like coming up this week is truckers.

We have to bring in the biggest creep. We make our arguments. And then it's a contest. People vote on you. You plot the bigger creep. After you get to the score of five wins in a row or five wins, the other person has to spin this wheel of consequences and go through

with the consequence. So it's very interactive. It's got a little bit of a great idea for a podcast. Like, yeah, it's fun. And dynasties after you win a bunch in punishments, that's fantastic. It's called the creep off. The creep off. Yeah, the creep off dot com.

Okay, what was your, what was your favorite creep so far that you brought in? Oh, this guy named Nick Bate. Do you know who that is? No. Nick Bate is in jail now for molesting his nine year old sister. But there's a video of him that I had a watch for the show because I have to do my research. He's trying to prove that he's innocent

because apparently he licked her butthole. Okay. And he says, I'll prove that I wouldn't do that. And he jerked off with his shit. He, he's shitting the toilet, grabbed his shit and then jerked off with it. And that was one of the most disturbing things I've ever seen. That's been my favorite creep so far. I, uh, I regret asking. All right. Goodbye. The creep off. Thanks. See you in Tampa. Bye. See you. Oh, wow. Fantastic, Sean. I, um, well, that was every time I asked.

I, I forget that it's always going to be some kind of gross petafine. For a fine. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know why I asked. Fine. Disgusting vomit inducing thing. Um, okay. Let's get's get low tax in here. Oh, did he just disappear? Low tax, get your buns in here. He's going to throw up.

Yeah. Low tax, there he is, there he is. Hey, low tax, you there. I think so. Yeah, what's up, man? Oh boy, I've been trying to score tickets to Queen right. There's all these right patients. So I have to sell for iron butterfly.

Oh, well, that's the good. Good. Can you tell the difference? Well, yeah, by the the crowd instead of like 68 year old smoking weed, it's a 78 year old smoking weed. That sounds like a better crowd to be honest. Sure. Yeah. So last time we talked, we actually went to an iron butterfly concert once ironically. And we were like the youngest people there by at least 300 years. I believe it. Did you have fun?

I was just looking at the people on the crowd. I mean, we didn't have anybody nearly as creepy as the other guy who just, honestly, when you said you regret asking that question, I regret hearing the answer. I know. Because that was, I get emails from people like, hey, can you stop talking about like, pedophile shit, I have this on it work. And I think every time I think I'm really trying, like I'm trying to avoid this shit, but I thought I'd get a nice. I'm trying to avoid this shit yet. I'm asking questions.

Tell me about the creepiest person ever. I thought I'd get a wholesome creep. Like, oh, he was looking in the windows on you. I guess sorority, big tiddit, big tiddit of age. Guy, here's a practicing Christian, but he really liked furries the end. Yeah, he was a creep in like a way that you like, not in a way that you want to throw in a wood shipper like, huh? I'm on the way that he's creepy.

I want creepy. Maybe everybody is a pedophile. I want creep light, man. I don't want full, yeah, creep. I don't want FDi creep. I want diet creeps. Where is this, where can I go for that? I want rated, PG 13 creeps, not rated,

and for sure. To the internet 20 years ago. Right. Yeah, let's do it. Let's build some, let's buy some satellites and get some old internet going on. Fuck this new internet. 1985.

Yeah, back to 1985. So last time we talked to you, you were in a bit of a jam with a young lady. And since then you have... Pickle. Since then you have sold something off, right? Uh, yeah, it was great because as you know on the internet, you're guilty until judged innocent and then even then you're guilty for the rest of your life. She accused me of domestic assault even though I was bedridden and I had a broken disk in my spine.

And I'm one of those people who I've only been on the internet for about like 22 years, so I don't really know how it works and operates and things like that. Yeah. And I just, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm a newbie on the internet. I don't even know what the pressing that F key does. I don't even know what happens if I do that. Yeah. So I thought that like if I was proven innocent or the charges were dropped that people would say, oh, the charges are dropped or oh, he's innocent.

Well, that was dumb. That was a dumb thing to think. I know. I know. I do this thing where I hope for the best in people and then I get disappointed and then I'm surprised even though it happened over and over and over and over again. Because where everybody goes and it gets dropped, it's like settled out a court. Yeah. Settle still guilty. The most obvious thing reason why he would settle is because he is a pedophile. I get bad news for you, Dotax. This is the best out of people. What you're witnessing is their best.

They're actually much worse. It's, it's just amazing because the prosecutor had to charge me with something. Okay, I don't know what the rules are here or how that works, but they had to charge me with something. So they dropped it down to the lowest possible thing, which was disturbing the public. So it's the same as like playing music loud or something like that. They tried to drop it to literally, they tried to drop it to littering, but they couldn't prove that I littered.

You beat a woman too loud and you threw her in the street. That's littering, Sarah. That's how she has trash. Yeah. Then I played Queens right, really, really, really loud the 2 a.m. Can you believe he came up with Queens, right? I don't know. You're always supposed to be specific.

What a poll. That's comedy. You got to be specific in your references. That's the first time I could think of it. I don't know you're always supposed to be specific. What a poll. That's comedy. You gotta be specific in your references. That's the first time I could think of. I don't know why. I was jamming to sticks. 3 a.m. So even that I could understand.

How was the sale of something awful? That's a big sale for you, isn't it? Yeah, it was a forced sale for me because obviously, since I was, there's always an excuse for anything. Like if people want to believe something, they're going to believe it, they're going to throw everything out. That's right. That doesn't fit into their narrow world view.

And so their new theories is that the charges were, what is it, not that they were dropped that I pled, I pled them down from domestic assault to delivering the public peace. Like you're charging somebody with murder, but it's just like, we're gonna plead you down to illegal dumping of a body. Yeah. Dumping without a license.

Yeah. God. That's a thing. They just don't know how anything works. But they know that they do. That's the problem. They know that they know how anything works, but in their minds, they know that they do.

Yeah. Everyone needs a fucking job. They need to feel. So they're spreading all this stuff still. They're saying that I'm a serial abuser, even though I, there's never been any charges. There's never, there was one accusation and that was dropped. And I'm a serial abuser, you know, just because. And they're doing awesome cool things such as like

Facebook and texting on Facebook to girl I dated in 2000 saying, are you aware that you dated a domestic abuser? Like if I was the domestic abuser, she would be aware. She would have been abused. I'm not gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I'm gonna say that I was domestically abused. Just in case you have any old photos of him, you're gonna wanna get rid of those.

You're in danger. You might have some forgotten memories of getting your ass kicked at night. You might be able to help us. I'm gonna do the Terminator thing, travel back in time domestically abused, come back. Yes, I would want to see my fat naked ass in a bubble appearing next to a next to a huge truck. He's a woman. Give me your abusing hands. My ZB is a woman

beating. And abusing hats. Give me a clothes and your wife be the, give me a wife be the, I'm your shit, give me a jacket. Never mind, I've got my own wife beater. Uh, God, I think people, well, I don't know, a lot of people seem to not understand how, how crazy women are. That's what I get from the whole thing, like any time somebody's, well, this woman said she filed a police report, like, yeah, do you, do you have any idea how fucking crazy women could be? How crazy do you think they are? They're worse. That's them on a good day, by the

way. Yeah. Well, even, even if we can get over that rampant massage that you're so famous for dick. If you just look at the girls past, it's just like, okay, recovering or alcohol, recovering co-cad. What is it, bipolar? Uh-huh, that's one of them. And then you think, okay, well, she's been drinking. She has been interfering her anti-psychotic medication with alcohol.

Oh, good. Perhaps she's not saying exactly what happened. Do the fact that she blacks out. You can predict with near certainty exactly what's gonna happen if that shit happens. Yeah. She's gonna make up crazy stories and throw herself down the stairs

and say that you got hit and call the cops and then You're gonna make up crazy stories and throw yourself down the stairs and say that you got hit and call the cops and they're gonna take you away because I don't know if this is what happened. I don't remember, but the problem was that I couldn't fucking move. I had a broken disk in my neck and somehow I overpowered it to abuse the hell out of a woman. Well, you're upset. Yeah, I could believe that part actually. If you're telling me that if my spine was broken, I couldn't beat a woman, I'm going to say, nah, I could do it. I'll figure it out.

You make your own. This is the long tangiously work movie stuff. I'll piss on my sheet and then wrap my sheet into a rope and then last so her ass at the door and drag her in and then like that. Very, and that's just off the top of my head. If I had time to think about it, like in misery, no problem. No, that's a good one. I just can't put a lasso together.

I tried that. I just ended up flailing a sheet at her. Come here so I can beat you. Come here so I can take you up the stairs and throw you down them. Is it weird not having something like you're totally, it's like you're Don Draper at the end of the series. Like you just said goodbye to that site you built that you built and that built culture on the internet. Is that a weird feeling?

Yeah, but then again, when I look at how the site is now, it's just like, it's intolerable. Yeah. I mean, literally you cannot make jokes there anymore. I started as a comedy website, I'm pretty sure. And it started as a comedy forum and there was comedy stuff coming out of that. And I don't know if you've guys have noticed it, but there hasn't been much comedy stuff

coming out of it lately. No, I haven't seen any comedy stuff in the internet a long time. People are shouting too. And so, yeah, everybody there obviously believes that I am guilty due to the fact that the charges were dropped. And so I will perpetually be guilty and nobody will ever say, you know, boy, we were wrong. We kind of ran this guy out of his own business. We kind of destroyed his life.

We kind of ruined 22 years of his career. We kind of made him unemployed. He's not doing anything now. But you know, it was fun at the time saying that he was guilty and, you know, telling everybody to stop donating to his Patreon and all that shit. Oh, yeah.

Well, the reputation destroying business has been in full swing for the past four or five years. I don't see much in the way of reputation restoration businesses happening. No. There's nobody's ever wrong. Yeah. And nobody follows up for the full story, too. That's what's fucking so maddening.

Everybody's a fucking headline reader. Oh, on the surface, yep, sounds like he probably did this. Nobody, even if you can find a follow-up story, you're lucky. Most people do not have any type of discipline to actually search and try to find out and root out what actually happened. And then go, oh, you know what?

It looks like that could just be a fucking story. I can't judge the guy guilty without way more fucking evidence, but people don't do that. It is, it's the culture of outrage. I mean, I've said this before, but outrage is currency. You've got one person who shouts the most and everybody looks at this person, they're just like, wow, what they're saying must be true because they're, you know, so passionate about it. Right. That's dick. That's dick.

That's dick. Yeah. No, what I'm saying is true. There's the passion is brainwashed into American kids at an early age, like the idea that you're not wrong, never saying that you're wrong, and just in that only passion will carry you through is brainwashed into our entire culture from an early age, and it's more and more so, I think, as you become inseparable from your screen. What did you want to call, you wanted to call in today and talk about something? I didn't want to get distracted before you got to it.

Low tax, didn't you? I think that was it. That was it. Okay. But I think the whole fact that unemployed and I've had my entire business taken away from me and the charges were dropped. Was my thing. Women, fucking women, man.

And it's the, well, I actually think I might have been referencing the follow-up where they're still harassing me and I'm getting mass Facebook where they complain about a post, even though it's clearly a joke and they just do it to get you banned. Yeah, I can't believe you saw on Facebook. Yeah, there's, well, I'm, I'm permaband for Twitter, because I said I was going to throw a chess board at Nancy Pelosi's head. I remember that.

A chess board. That's high brow comedy. That I was just temporarily banned for that one. I was perma banned because I told her to eat children and their explanation for my perma ban was that was age discrimination. I swear. I swear. I swear.

I swear. I swear to God. They said it was age discrimination. I'm like, was that a, should I put Nancy Pelosi, eat the children and the elderly? Was that a plea deal? Yeah, was that a plea, did you,

did you plead that down to age discrimination? I mean, I think the lesson is, originally it was an outright death threat and then I pled down to eat the children. Right, I think the lesson is, if you're gonna be guilty in the court of public opinion, you might as well do it. You might as well.

I was saying, I was saying, I was accused of abusing this woman. I should get a free shot. Yeah, you really should. Like, here, I'm just gonna, I know you guys will never admit your wrong, so I'm gonna make it right. I'm just gonna I know you guys will never admit your wrong. So I'm gonna make it right I'm gonna pop her one time on TikTok so that you you can I don't we have to we can stop fighting

You're like oh good there. He did it. Yeah, he did it. We'll just we'll leave you alone now We'll leave you alone now Yeah, we got that backwards and then they'll stop and then they will probably stop yeah like that is the fucking sick part about it Like okay, yeah, yeah, I'm good now. I'm good. I'm good. I can you've taken the sliver out of my brain I just wanted to be proved right yeah I finally have proof Right I knew he was guilty because he had it in him. I know he did. He might not have

actually done the first one, but he did the second one, which means he's had it in him the whole time. Guilty. God. I think that is like how can things get worse for me? Can I lose another website? I haven't started one yet. Don't ask for it. Can I, can I wait 22 years and build another career and lose that? You could pretend to be a woman on Twitch or a banana. You could take a, do Maddox's thing. His, his second act. You could post videos of your dogs. Yeah. See, I don't have any. They were taken away from me after all the domestic abuse. That sucks. That's unfortunate. Yeah, I took away my dogs, my cats, everything.

Wow. Really? All of them. Wow. Wow. That's 43. The internet. What are you going to do?

I don't know. That's the position I'm in. I don't know. That's the position I'm in. I'm actually searching for jobs. I had people I was looking at a job at a company for a community manager, which is basically what I've been doing, hurting cats for the best 22 years. I figured I was a lock, but then somebody messaged them and saying, hey, you might want to be careful.

Oh, God. Yeah. Yeah. He was once accused of something by a fucking insane person out of her mind on pharmaceuticals and booze. Any email that you get should plant the image that is unrequested or unsolicited, should plant the image of someone of Buffalo Bill sitting at home with their dick tucked between their legs, putting on lipstick while they're writing you that email. Because no

sort of sane person would ever send an email to anyone that was not solicited. The act of sending an email that is not in your business is one of the most insane things you could do. So nothing is off the table. But people believe it. People think like there's a guy, there's a mirror image of them sitting on the other side of the computer that's writing the email. Even though they have themselves never written such an email. Yeah. It's shame. Sorry, buddy. I've got the Scarlet letter. I've got the internet scarlet letter. Well, I don't know, man. So other than that, how's it going? That's a going, no, I'm not. It's good, you guys hiring only women beaters and you don't qualify.

So sorry, just wait. mess like a music yeah People on the internet believe me for once they believe in me. I can do this. Yeah Well, fuck man give out give out your patreon at least It's gaming garbage gaming garbage gaming garbage. I still play terrible, terrible ass games on YouTube. Okay. Sorry, buddy. I hope things get better for you. Thank you. I mean, you know, shit happens. So, you know, I, it's just a lot of fighting going on, a lot of stupid internet shit going on. And unfortunately, the internet has leaked into real life and we don't have the, I mean, the internet is real life at this point. Yeah.

As soon as it's monetized, it becomes. Yeah. I agree. So, I don't know. One day I'm going to start a platform that has extremely stringent requirements to get in. Like, not only credit card, you have to pass like all these fucking tests just to get in because there's no barrier of entry to the internet anymore.

Yeah, it's bad. Yeah, it's like parenthood. Yeah. Everything comes with the internet. You can't buy a single item anywhere that doesn't have the internet on it. So we need to make it more difficult for people to get on or use these services or find things we need to just, I don't know, man. Come on over to the blockchain dog.

Come on over to blockchain. My sister called me today because I give my nephews bitcoins for their every holiday and birthday. I just load them up. So my sister calls and says, hey, how do I access these? And I said, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You don't get a tutorial.

They got to figure that shit out when they want to use them. And they'll probably, hopefully, they'll be worth, shit loads of money by then, because it's a little bit, but there is a barrier of entry there, which is nice, which is fucking great that even the name crypto will scare people away from talking about it. I hope it never gets easy, but you know, we'll figure out something complicated if it does. If it's on the internet, they'll figure out a way ruined it.

Yeah. All right, buddy. And on a happy note. Get out of here. Can I tell you, before I go, can I tell you one thing about my biggest creep? Okay. I'm not going to. I just joking.

Thank you. I'm going to spare you. Goodbye. Goodbye. I'm going to sell for it again. Cause that's the thing you fell for it again, Dick. I always, you and your queens, right? I know there's a lot of creeps out there.

There's a lot of creeps out there. There's a lot of creep lights out there. Like we don't have to go to the very bottom with creeps all the time. You asked for the biggest, you asked for the biggest one. Yeah, that's true. That's true. I messed up. You got jerking off with shit. That's like asking somebody tell me the worst thing in the world. And they tell you to you're like, that was the worst thing in the world. Why did you tell me that? Dude, again, tell me a bad thing, but not the worst thing. Internet. All right, by the tax. Yeah, thanks for having me on.

Bye bye. Better luck next time. Uh, poor guy. Poor bastard. No kidding. All right, let me make sure everything's still working here. Yeah, you're in there, you're in your dark cave. Everything seems to be streaming properly.

Okay, let's read some comments. Kevin Stewart, dear Dick. I don't know if I got to everything. Any silk road, legal shit. Amber, herd is fat. Everybody's talking about how Amber heard is beat up Johnny Depp, but no one's talking about how Amber Hurd is beat up Johnny Depp, but no one's talking about how fat she is. That she's in this awkward movie.

I don't know. Was it up to us to cover that? It's up to me, yeah. I'm pretty much the only person that covers fat chicks. I think probably in the world. You're one of a very few, I think. Very few, but no, I don't think anyone covers it with my gusto. No, I would, yeah.

I really do feel like that is my purpose is keeping women, keeping them from gaining too much weight. You can never stop it, but you can try to slow it. You know, but it's like, it's like trying to stop the tide. I'm out there. I'm stop the tide. I'm out there It's like my Jordan. Yeah, I'm out there. We'll just one stop. You can only hope to contain him I'm out there just standing in the ocean saying no stop to the tide and the women just keep getting fatter at At an insane rate

But I'll still try till I'm dead Okay, well you can only stop the one right in front of you. Thank you. Like the tide. Yes. Dear Dick, what makes me a rage is getting COVID being told not to come to work for the next two weeks and then not being able to buy the new Xbox. The whole world is so out of these things right at the time when I could actually not go to my job and play.

Oh, oh, oh, that's X. Wait, wait, he goes to his job to play Xbox? No, no, no, he has to stay home, because he got COVID. No, but you said when I cannot go to my job and play, is that what you just said? When I actually, when I could actually not go to my job as in not go to my job and stay home and play,

he just left out. I mean, he's not, oh, got it. Yeah, yeah, got it. Yeah. Yeah, they should have a separate website where people with COVID can buy one. Yeah, they really should. Sort of like make a wish. Maybe not, yeah.

To make matters worth, worth my wife threw away my old Xbox. Oh, I did see. Thinking you have a new one. So all I have is my shitty PC from 2013 to game with, oh, fuck you, and Microsoft, Kevin and Maryland. Oh, buddy, why did you go by a used one? They're all, they're always cheap and they come with a million games. Episode 30, 230, Diet Coke versus Coke being too similar. Same problem with ordering iced tea. It's from Dr. Jebus. Poor motherfuckers can't

say unsweet tea without saying sweet tea. So's from Dr. Jebus. Poor motherfuckers can't say unsweet tea without saying sweet tea. So you're permanently playing a coin toss at this appointment. Yeah, solution, call it dirty tea. Call it skinny people tea and call the sweet and tea fat tweet tea. Do you want fat person tea or do you want tea that tastes like dirt? I'll take the dirt T, please. See, that's a southern thing.

That's the sweet T is a southern thing. But out here, it's fucking passion fruit, iced tea. Yeah, you're right. Mango guava, passion fruit, fucking, I don't know, bullshit iced tea. And the option, if they have a, if there's a second choice, it's regular iced tea. Yeah, just give me the dirt.

Give me the dirt, see, look, look at me. What fucking kind of tea do you think I'm sitting around drinking sweet tea? Oh, day, you bitch. Crabby, yo dick, my whole life, I've wanted to think well of people. Uh-oh. That's a mistake.

Here we go. As I got older, I saw friends and other people keep getting into dumber situations. Let me guess. One of the biggest reasons for their stupidity. What's he friends with low tax? Man, I think everyone's friends with low tax. One of the biggest reasons for their stupidity,

which I kept denying was either that I was talking to women or talking to men obsessed with women. Am I just going hard, Tom Likus now? Sean, is that what I'm doing at 40? That bitch, I'm that bitch. You got to spend $40. The crazy energy would get passed around by everyone and make everything miserable. After getting out of a dumb situation with a woman, I talked to her over a year.

I'll try to stick it in my silly head to look at both women and men affected by women, like they are dumb, rather than them being able to think like me at all. Those thoughts were just thought up after seeing you tweet about how women are stupid. Just need to nail it in my head now. Yeah, well, you nailed it in your head every couple weeks. Take a refresher. Johnny Rico transgender woman won Miss New Zealand. Men do everything better than women. A transgender woman won Miss New Zealand. Let's see about that. Really? It wasn't like Miss transgender New Zealand. Sean, you know, goddamn, well, there's no Miss transgender New Zealand. What was that?

Well, you know, I was holding on to hope. What was holding on to hope right there? Miss Lady Boy, Miss Lady Boy universe. Here he is. This is political correctness run absolutely wild and pissing and shitting all over the house and attacking every guest that comes in. This needs to be put down. You think so?

Google.com. Multiple sources. Ms. New Zealand. How come I can't find it? Transgender. Transgender woman. 26 crowned. Ms. New Zealand. Miss New Zealand. Okay, so that's normal.

Uh, Filipino woman. Oh boy. Oh, come on. Yeah, to put it right out front. Phil, I want about five to about 165 pounds. All right. Phil Vino woman 26 who is disowned by her family for being transgender has made history after being crowned Miss New Zealand. R. R. R. They gave her a trophy. You know, let's see what she looks like.

So much of family. Come on. Speaking to Metro, Ariel said, the pageant was an amazing experience. It's something I've wanted to do for the longest time. So to actually live out my dream has been amazing. Come on, this is Miss New Zealand. I mean, come on.

Come on. Can you see it, Sean, on my screen? Come on. Come on. I can. Come on. Come on. Can you see it, Sean on my screen? Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Oh, God, damn it. I'm looking at the pictures ever right now. There's nothing sacred on the transgender. I mean, I'm just, it's impossible to comment on it on the way that I would comment on these pictures if it was a woman.

I mean, if it was a biological woman, it's just impossible to say the things that I would say if that were true, which is fucking mad at me! Well, good job, guys. I love this. I'm proud of you. Said coming out as transgender is more terrifying than being a gay man because of the way people view you,

changes forever. Ariel who's studying for a fashion design, bachelor's degree, revealed coming out as, despite being aware, blah blah blah blah blah. She was kicked out of her family. I don't care, good for you. Good job. Let's see.

Okay. After getting, oh no no. Men win again, just take that, women. Fuck you. Well that's true. You wanna get your crown back loose? Yeah, lose some weight, get good. Get good, ladies.

Oops. I think I just threw away the rest of the comment. Yeah, who cares? I think so. Yeah, here we go. James Beechham, Australian Hentai band equals Bigmouth, Bigmouth band. Do you know that show Bigmouth? No, you don't know the show. Australian hen tie band equals big mouth big mouth band. Do you know that show big mouth?

No, you don't know the show. I don't. It's a cartoon. No. James, you hate big mouth and Steven universe. I really, I do not hate either of those television programs. They're just weird. I don't watch them. And all these other child sexualizing American God, damn it.

Can we go one fucking episode without this shit? Stop. No, while you were, while you were worried about big mouth, the left stole an election while you were impotently bitching like a little bitch about big mouth, Democrats stole your ability to vote. Let that sink in, if you are at all concerned in your life, about the TV show Big Mouth, someone is out there literally stealing all of your civil liberties in the form of voting. They're all fucking gone. If you don't vote, you have none.

That's why I said at the very beginning of the pandemic, they're going to scope everything at stake as civil liberties, everything not one or two or three, but all of them. While you're sitting there complaining about fucking big mouth, um, a guy in parliament, even got, I'm not reading about, I'm not reading about any more kid shit anymore. I don't fucking care. Uh, uh, Isaiah pool, the disconnect between you and Sean's opinion of COVID,

I think is that Sean actually cares about the experts and looking into the numbers and projects that, projects that optimistically on other people where you see COVID as the tool that it is serious or harmless. Yeah. Do you see it as a tool? I'm going to wash my hands more. I don't know what to, everyone should do that. I'm talking to my mom to wash the fuck out of her hands.

Anything can be politicized. Anything can be politicized. And I'm not interested in the politicization of really anything. I mean, because I think each side will use what they, you know, what they can to their advantage. Well, one side is, one side is tyranny. The other side is freedom. So I agree with you.

Good luck, I'm gonna shoot. On realizing our criminal justice system is fucked. Hey, Dick, this isn't a letter that's meant to be read on the show instead it's a serious recommendation on Netflix in case you haven't heard it. It's called forensic files. And it examines criminal cases that have occurred in the US. The big takeaway I get from every episode is just how fucked are police and criminal justice system is. Seriously, they even have episodes where they put a man on death row for killing a woman only because his teeth kind of looked like

a bite mark on the victim and was later exonable. Yeah, I bet they had an expert in there. Well, he's fucking teeth marks. If you could see the average Joe will look at two teeth marks and go, huh, that's interesting. They look the same. But then you get that same person and put a lab coat on them, put them on the stand, say, this expert, Dr. Slappdick here says that those things look the same. It's not the same person.

But the bite mark, the same person. But the by mark. It's not the same person. But that by mark shit is false. Like that is, I mean, this is like doctors throughout history and experts have been experts in fields that turn out to be total horse shit. And it can, like the idea that that stopped happening in the modern age is preposterous. Of course, there are still people going around promoting brunt bunk science

uh... and the by mark is one of them it's like well despite mark expert or this handwriting expert says that these two are identical people people in the journal oh yeah well that that i mean they do look the same and that expert guys is that if it was just me looking at it looked the same that doesn't make me confident now that this fucking moron who is wrong by the way who is completely wrong says says that that's,

by the experts, it's okay. Now that guy should go to, that guy, give him the chair, give him the fucking chair. Whereas ordinarily, they would say, like, I don't know, looks the same, but, ah. Yeah, I mean, look at the, you know, I gotta look at the case, when it was, who it was, who, because sometimes they get people

who have no expertise in a field, too. Well, you can't, it's like, oh, he's a doctor, but he's not familiar with this. You like that. And they just go, oh, here's an expert opinion. They just hire people for a quote unquote expert opinion because they hold a doctorate, you know, or a license of some sort. But that happens all the time but that happens all the time. That happens all the time.

That's what I'm saying. That there are experts in fields that you cannot have experts in. So the process, do you understand what I mean? What do I do? You cannot have a bite mark expert because it is not science. So it's just crowning an expert in that field

as since it is not scientifically factual at all, is impossible. Right, so they got a doctor or a dentist or somebody. No, he was, she probably said he was an expert, like, phonology has had textbooks of why this was true. Oh, no, I know. I know. So, it's studying and anoint each other as,

oh, this guy knows more about it than me. And he knows more about the fairy tale. Yeah. What I'm saying is the process of an, I understand. The process of anointing experts is not immune from the human element. No, absolutely not. Again, it's fucked, but yeah, I'm into that. Ponco Anem says, laugh at my ass off, I bet you 50 bucks, patty, see cups, punishment

game for spilling a beer is blowing the other dude. Like, hey, bro, I noticed you spilled some beer out there. He listened to the episode. Yeah. Grab his bulge, you know, the real world. What's the craziest thing you've ever done at a party? It's like, oh man, I'm the guy who just gets, you know, all eyes are on me and I get wild and I just run up to my buddy and like grab him and then like kiss his head and just go, it's nothing but love, man.

That is what he said. That's crazy. Out of control. Wow. That's wild. That's the crazy thing I have. Out of control. Ever heard of.

I mean, you got to steer clear of that guy. Somebody sent in an Alex Trebek with Dick and Shadek. Hey, Dick, I made this a while ago, but since old Alex Trebek chose uncontrollable cell division for a thousand, I figured this might be relevant. I made this audio. Hey, that was my joke. Was it from an old Dick show episode? Yeah, well, I said, I'll take uncontrolled cell division for 350 or something like that. Oh, yeah.

Let's play it. Joke stealer, kill that guy. Like I've never stolen a joke, you know. Here we go, here we go. Let's see how long it is, dude. This historical North Hollywood. A minute 42. Ah, buddy.

All right, let's see. Let's see. When Chad gives me the ink, I'll give him the ink. This historical North Hollywood theater experienced a successful rebirth in the year 2000. Dick and Sean. It's like a play theater or whatever. It's a couple, it's, it's, it's, it's a little licking. I don't, the one on Lanker Shim, like kind of the one theater.

No, it's like a big, it's an Alportal. That's not, that's not why I'm seeing it. What is the Alportal? It's like just North of the answer. You two, we need to move on to the fun. No, no, it's like a, it's like a... We can't accept that answer, Tim. What is the L-feeder is that in the Eurothalli? The L-Portal.

You got it. Whatever, I don't know what I just said. Excuse me. I don't know why. Dick Shaw, this has been... It doesn't even matter. He has solved this one, and we're moving on. I'll take Hills and Valleys for 800.

Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norge were the first to reach this mountain summit. What is Mount Everest? Sean, I want to say 8,840 meters. No, no, the question wasn't about the height of this mountain. Okay, just ten seconds. Okay, just ten seconds. Whether you count the fucking ice cap on top of the mountain. This is the 29,000 on your dick.

29,028 feet or 29,035 feet. All right, you two, I'm like you two or 28. Excuse me. It's Everest. All right, it's Everest. It doesn't matter how tall it just, what is it? Just give me a final answer.

I wasn't asking for the highest grade. This is great. This is great. Motherfucker, you're like that. You're a condescending fag. I'm sorry, who let these two on the shelf? No, that's what I was. Will someone get them out of here? Right, that's like a card, did they? fucker you like that you can't ascending fuck I'm sorry who let these two on the shelf oh that's what someone get them out of here right that's like a card did they

try to get out of like that was he was like he was trying to play it off like that was that you could see the embarrassment on his face okay do more I don't have anymore. That's all he got. No, no, no, no, he needs to send, that was a win, right? That was great. I mean, yeah, that was good.

So he's got to do, he's sent more in. Alex really could not remember the Elportal theater. I like the, they climbed this mountain mountain Everest, right? I don't, I don't wait for you, but, what is? That was good. Let's see here. I remember talking about the height of that. Rage fart knockers is people who drive

with their headlights on during the day. It's the same as driving by yourself with a mask on. Do they still have those areas where they're doing like a study that's to see if driving with your headlights on is safer? You ever seen this? I don't know, but there's a, well, yeah, the daytime headlights. Yeah, they put their sound on a lot of the older roads. Yeah. Yeah, I don't, I don't know.

It's, there are always on roads where slower traffic gets passed a lot in the oncoming lanes. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like out in like the analog valley or if you're going. You know what I mean? Like out in the analog valley, or if you're going out to like Mahavi, or somewhere like that, where there's just one lane per side, and there's like some old guy on a truck,

and you gotta get around. So people do that, and then they don't see the car, the oncoming car. So I think that's why they do it. I don't know if, I don't know how much safer it is. Well, I've seen those signs since I was a kid,

but in 30 years, I have not seen a, the like, when is the study coming that says whether that's worked or not? Is the study signs always there? The sign is gonna be there and we'll have self-driving cars. I'm like, well, did they ever finish that study? How do you do the study? How do you do the study?

Do they, you make people for like five years turn off there? Well, you like or just like that's what it, that's what signs away. That's what I thought when I was a student. I was like five years turn off there. Well, yeah, that's what it signs away. That's what I thought when I was a student, I'd be in kill people. Well, they got us, maybe they're causing accidents. Like, oh, there's a fucking UFO coming around the thing. I gotta get off the road.

You know, that's an interesting point. I thought they were gonna stop it eventually and say like, oh, you know what guys, we did a science. Congratulations, we now know that daytime running lights are more safe, so everyone has to do them. But then they never have it. So it's just this guy. This guy cared that much about, this guy cares that much about

the time that leaves. My whole fucking life, like where's the, when is the study concluding? I want, we have, we're talking about a study or just the concept of turning on the, somehow your civil liberties are violated by turning on your headlights, I think, in the daytime, right? If it's illegal to not have them, then yes. But I want to know what the study's determined, whether it's safer or not.

That's what I want to know. Don't cut these. I wonder if anyone's ever been cited for not having there in a daylight section. I wonder if anybody's ever been cited for not having them on. They better not because it doesn't say it's mandatory. Just as we appreciate. No, no, no. It's kind of implied that they're doing, they're asking you a favor, which is nice.

I wish speed limit signs. Yes, signs were like, yeah, 35 if it's not too much trouble. Like not speed limit in your face, just like we depreciate it. You know, everyone would kind of, everyone would be a little more relaxed if you would just drive at 25 if that's okay. You know? If you smile, we're in a hurry. We understand.

If you're in a hurry, we totally get it. Probably not going to be a cop. Just do it next time. But next time, maybe next time, go a little slower. If you're taking, if you're taking miles out of the bank this time, put them back in next time. And we'll get through this together. Quality penis.

Take a penny, leave a penny. Yeah. Have you ever left a penny? Yeah. Have you ever taken a penny? I hate pennies. Oh yeah, that's true. Oh yeah.

Sure. Quality penis, going to work when the sun is down and leaving work when the sun is down. Yeah, that's horrible. Yeah, sorry, quality penis. Got some advice. I think, what are you guys posting in here? What's Ralph saying?

The white supremacist sympathizing livestreamer. Hey, Jack, how do I lose weight? This is from Ty. So I want to start losing weight by running more often. Since right now I only lift. That's cool Come to find out When you're fat and have asthma running for five minutes makes you not able to breathe

So I started taking medicine to help me breathe more better consistently without an inhaler turns out my medicine makes me incredibly hungry Which isn't the best trying to lose weight also Because my mom thought it'd be a good idea to make me take allergy shots, which we're supposed to make your allergies go away. Your mom, what the hell? I received a rare side effect that makes me allergic

to nearly every fruit investor. First of all, don't be doing anything. No, no, no, listen to your mom. Never do what your mom says to do. Definitely don't put anything in your body or your blood, because your mom tells you to your mom. Never do what your mom says to do. Definitely don't put anything in your body or your blood because your mom tells you to do it. That bitch might not even know where her pussy is. Think that if your mom gives you advice,

say, there's a one in four chance. Can you point to your pussy right now? The only things I can eat, have you gotten, do you still have excess blood in your body that you need to get rid of? The only things I can eat without having an allergic reaction are meals, are meats, potatoes, and some steamed retards.

Huh. And because of the medicine, vegetables. And because of the medicine that helps me live, I have to eat even more. Well, I don't know about that, allergy shots from mom. So, Dick, do you have any tips for someone who's asthmatic and allergic to healthy food to lose weight? I would go get, you gotta, you always gotta get a second opinion

from a man when it comes to shit that mom says to do every fucking, that is, that's more important than losing weight right now is run moms, run moms advice through a filter until you can be able to eat more or less a wide variety of food. Yeah. And stop drinking, you're probably drinking carbs, but you drink a, drink a coke, switch to diet or switch to water. And if you're just, if you're pounding, like, I don't know, you get bored of, if you're

just eating healthy food, you kind of get bored of it all day, don't you? Do you? I sure as hell do. Yeah. Just eating. I love to eat. Yeah, just eating rice or whatever. Yeah, get a second.

Ian says, hey, the other day is my mom's trying to set me up. The other day my mom hit me up saying I should meet this girl. She knows from her job. Wow, probably job. Wow. Probably big. How? What? Mom's trying to set them younger people or looking for an older woman for them.

I don't know. Tells me she's cute and likes a lot of the same stuff as me and that she's interested in meeting me. Now obviously this is sort of embarrassing to begin with because my mom is trying to set me up with someone. Why? Why would that be embarrassing? That would be fucking great. Mom, or a mom meetup?

That's like, that's, you're already on your third fucking date. Now, obviously, this is so, oh yeah, but I'm like a lot of the guys in the Virgin contest, IE not exactly the most outgoing, so I feel like it's dumb to pass up an opportunity to meet a cute girl who's interested in meeting me. Holy shit, are you, don't be, don't be embarrassed by that. Jesus Christ, be embarrassed about every other way to meet a girl going to a bar and getting shit-faced or loading a fucking computer

and letting an algorithm match you up with some attention whore who's got 10,000 messages in her inbox. So I meet her and she's cute and what not? Likes a lot of the same stuff as me and we had a fun conversation. It was a pretty decent time. Seems like a no-brainer to keep talking to her, right? Well, here's the thing.

She's 17 and I'm 20. God damn it. Wait, what? She's 17 and I'm 21. Now I'd like to say that. A fucks up with his mom. Mom. Mom's a pedophile.

Mom. Mom, what are you trying to get your mom? Why would you do? You knew God damn well that I couldn't have sex with her. And that's 18. I bet you fucking do this. Now I'd like to say first that the age of consent is in my state is 16. Now bad news buddy, that's, no, I'd like to say first that the age of consent in my state is 16.

No, bad news buddy, that doesn't matter because guys are just itching to get in fights. And secondly, that we're both Christian and I intend to follow the whole no sex outside marriage thing. Oh, this is fucking perfect. Actually, then you should be dating an even younger girl. However, my brother already made fun of me for talking to her. So I'm worried about what people would say if I actually tried to get to know her more.

And so on. My mom seems to think the age difference is no big deal because she's in college. She's in college. I guess I was in college at 17. But I'm just really worried that if this is morally wrong or have some kind of sick go for even continuing to talk to this girl, even though she seems to be enjoying it, I mean, man, Hollywood's age,

if consent has really fucked people up. This guy is probably more moral than anyone I have ever met in my life. He's being himself up about it. Curious about your thoughts? I'd mention cup size, no, but you can't, because under the circumstances, the question seems inappropriate.

Also, I just like to mention, I did win the Virgin Contest a year back with this crazy bisexual girl, the ensuing mess and insults I received from her at the time, at the time, girlfriend, or a pretty big reason I went back to the Christian faith, she just seems simpler to me. I mean, buddy, if you're feeling like it's immoral, don't do it.

That's pretty, that should be pretty obvious to you. I didn't, I can't read some easy. You gotta live with yourself. You're in your own head. You're in your own head, but, you know, somebody else make a decision for you. Man, it seems like your head's leaning one way. If it makes you uncomfortable, don't do it, man.

Just wait, wait. Wait for God's sake. If you need to do it, wait. But if you don't want to, fuck it, do whatever you want. One more. Are you gonna tell everyone? Yeah, you do. Listen to God, you gotta pray to God. They'll tell you what to do need some advice about my girlfriend can hey dick. I got a big problem with my girlfriend

She's more met he's 21 and she's 17. I mean pretty I Think that's even legal in do you remember that big thing where everyone was bitching about how California made it like legal to be they, they were saying California made it legal to be a pedophile or something like that. What? You know what, I don't care. I don't care. You gotta explain more.

I don't want to, I don't even want to talk about it. Need some advice about my girlfriend. Hey, I could just got a big problem with my girlfriend. Oh, hello, sympathizer. She's more mentally ill than most women with bipolar disorder and sometimes she disassociates randomly. She thinks I'm cheating on her, no matter what, I'm no matter what I say, she keeps thinking it.

She's got amazing double D size tits and a juicy ass, so I'd rather not lose her, but I don't get how to... Oh. Didn't, listen to the low tax interview. Yeah. Uh, I mean, just, just, just buckle up. Just know what you're getting in.

You know, you're signing up for there. It's just, but I know that it could go horribly sideways into a ditch, but I catch on fire. But I don't get how to make her stop being so paranoid. When I talk to her about it, she brings up all these nonsense points that have no correlation to each other. How should I tell her that I'm not cheating in a way that will finally put this issue away? Just cheat on her with your fists. Just kidding. Just fucking cheat on her. Do it with your fists. Just do it. Just cheat on her and get her away. Open palm.

Cheat on her. She'll obviously stick around because she's crazy. You don't have to, but give her what she wants. She wants you to cheat on her. Just fucking do it. You are only there to fuck her. So it's not like you owe her anything. Cheat on her, get it over with. So both of you are on the same page. All right, everybody, this is with the show at patreon.com slash the show. But you can stab a minute sleep. Yeah, then she gets stabbed in your sleep. Just cheat,

just cheat on her. And and and be and rest assured that she's cheating on you. All right. Page on the console.com slash the dick show. See you next Tuesday. We'll do some voicemails. Sean, stick around for the voicemails. You go. Yes, sir. Go to Tampa. Tampa.dick.dick.dick.dick. Show.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, of those black, this big fat, big fat antifa woman that got stabbed and has a bunch of braids coming out of her hair. Oh, God.

Because she's lying on the ground after getting stabbed. That's pretty funny. Pretty funny. I mean, you know, six sort of way. Yeah, I did that. Pretty cool. Oh, okay. Here's one.

Let's do some voicemail. Got some comments, Dija. I got a lot. I got 2,000 likes on that. Really? Wow. Pretty good. On my Twitter. Yes, on you got 2000 likes on that.

Excuse me. Oh, God. Here we go. Oh, this one will be good. Objects and mirror are fatter than they appear. Although I'm super excited for a road-wage Tampa. Yes. Tampa.dig.show. Objects and and the mirror are faster than they appear.

Honestly, Sean, who do you know? Better. Who do you know who is like the vanguard against fat ladies? Just me. Just you. Just me. No one else. No one else goes as hard as I do. No one's talking about Dick. Okay, let's try this one. Hey, Dick, you know what really makes the array is Indian guys. And specifically how Indian guys learn English. I work at a call center, so it's partly a array from that.

But most people, when they learn English, they'll start off with some simple, basic phrases expand from there, kind of learn how the culture uses certain words and phrases, and things like that. But in the end, guys, seem to go the exact opposite direction, they start off with the most idiotic, old-timing phrases that nobody ever uses uses and no natural English speaker would ever use it in a day-to-day conversation. Like, nobody says more over anymore. Nobody says dust anymore. Yeah, they do. We're going to get that. The tendency to repeat themselves with as many of these ridiculous phrases as possible. It just makes me want to bash my head against the wall telling us, shut the fuck up. More over.

That's what? Use some simple questions. But I hate, I think a call center's gonna make me kill myself. Anyway, Indian guys. You know something's got to. Bye. God, they do. I wish that level where somebody learns a language,

but then like it's not fluent, but they've learned all the words to be dangerous with it is harder to understand them than right before that where they don't really know English, but they're kind of piecing it together and just using like now now like, now, like an American Indian, they're like, sky, big, big bird sky. And you're like, oh yeah, I know what you're talking about,

but then when they learn this call center thing, it was like, moreover, and thusly, it would be, I have an intituborous concern about it. I was like, man, I can't fucking understand what you're saying. Yep. Okay. Dick, this is a new rage, man man i'm at the fucking bank you're trying to get money

uh... for drugs and and i'm looking at i'm trying to pull up the a-t-m-t-m is gone they got rid of it because the covid so now i have to drive up instead i guess somehow it's safer is a teller gives her fucking chronage irons to me that it is an ATM great it's all the fingers I think an ATM should have a big a big bottle of sanitizer people just I mean you know put it on and then use the keypad and then

walk away and then somebody puts it on use a key keypad, walk away. I know it gets stuck. No, I'll be the opposite. You use the keypad and then use it. You should have it in your fucking car before and over. Before and after. Why would they get rid of a perfectly sterile environment? People are so fucking dumb. All the ATMs are open around here.

Yeah, they are. I haven't seen that, but everyone's just kind of winging it. Nothing's working, but everyone is winging it regardless. Let's see here. Hey, Dick, it's Sam from Connecticut. What's up? I sweared up fucking God. Nobody works at any of the hardware stores around here. I went to one of them to buy a fucking door and I was walking down the aisle and I see an employee and I'm like, hey, can you help me for a second? And the guy is like, I don't even know what a fucking door is.

And the manager should be here. Just like that. I call them. I don't even know what a fucking door is. Okay. Great. So I'm waiting in the door aisle for like half an hour waiting waiting waiting waiting for you walk by Fucking put monsters down and runs away

Now what so I call the fucking store Get the front Front desk and I said hey, can you transfer me to the door to party? You see that movie falling down? And then we can't help problems. So they, yeah, right, transfer me to the door department. And the fucking phone next to me ring was like, what the fuck?

So I'm there for an hour waiting for any of the phone department. Fucking door is. And nobody comes. So I fucking leave without a door. Oh God. I hate hard where I saw. I don't know. The Home Depot's policy. Some of them exist anymore. It's all Home Depot are low. And their policy of hiring young women is so offensive to me. I don't know why, I don't know how the cell phone stores all hire sleaze DJs, men, and home depot.

Manages to hire young fat women. Like what is, can you guys, can you turn over, nobody knows anything except the one guy who's in his 50s who's been there for 25 years. If you can find that guy, you're golden. He knows where everything is, how to do everything. Anybody else in that store you talk to is not going to be there the next month. Walking like this. Like a half god.

How have you not had an accident? How have you been working here? Even one day and you haven't been hit, you haven't had one of those hoop earrings taken out by a forklift. Take the cell phone store guys. I don't know, put a mark, put it like an incentive on lumber. So they try to sell as much as possible, but please, please swap them. Please fucking swap them. I I cannot take I cannot take it. Okay. Here we go. All right. One more try. What's up fellas? Ryan from the grill cast here. I got a rage for you. So I listen to NPR sometimes when I'm driving to him from where

because I'm a retard and you know sometimes they're talking about Trump and specifically him wanting to leave Afghanistan and every time he's talking about him wanting to leave the Middle East every time they ask they have some fucking retards some guy on the house committee right the House Intelligence Committee do you support do you support leaving do you support leaving the words and they always say well possibly possibly we have to do possibly. We have to do it right. We have to do it right. What do you mean we have to do it right?

And they always lay out all these stupid fucking turns and conditions and they're like, oh, the Hicken Craterinos, we gotta save them. And so fucking stupid, man, I'm telling you, these people go on a leave. And they're posturing like they do, like, possibly, but we have to do it right. There's no right fucking have to do it right there's no right

fucking way to do it it's always going to be a fucking hell skate there. We can't fix it. We're like an abused girl friend. He's like, oh, I just got a fix in and everything's gonna be okay. It's never going to fucking happen man. It's never going to happen in these retards yeah and they listen to yeah well we have to do it right we gotta do it right

i hate it we just need to leave we need to go we've been there this people isn't into this voice mail right now to have literally born. Yeah, we started this shit like 20 years ago. No, 20, 15 years. It's like Vietnam just fucking just go home.

I didn't work anyway. Love you Sean. Peace. Hey, thanks. Yeah, I read somewhere that we don't write. Dick, do it right means that we don't leave until we're sure that like our interest in the region can be maintained with some level of stability. Man, you know, that's what they mean by, by do it right. No, you know, I think. No, they mean they just said a magical phrase that will cause you to invent the smartest explanation possible. That's what do it right means.

So you have just invented a very smart explanation for that just because you heard those words. But everybody else is inventing an explanation that is as smart as they can think of and attributing it to that guy. It is self-sick. Go ahead. I think that's exactly what they mean.

But you know, and they'll pray on people's compassion to where it's like, well, we can't leave it destabilized. I mean, they're going to come in, somebody's going to come in, somebody's always going to come in and fill the fucking vacuum. What they mean, what happened is never. When they say we got to do it right what they actually mean is Well never we're not my entire our entire my entire salary is based on their being perpetual war We'll do it we'll do it never because I would I need to feed my family I can't go I'm not gonna go work at best buy I'm a general in the fucking military as long as as long as there is a Military I eat like what do you get out of Afghanistan? Are you fucking kidding me? Do you know how much money I make by being Afghanistan?

Fucking never. Let's like go with stereo, the top and say like thing, all that kind of shit. It's, it's crazy. When Saddam in their, you know, 90, 91 or so invaded Kuwait and we got him out of there, you know, a lot of people said, you know, to the first push, like, you know, why don't you go take him out? Why don't you go into back? Take him out. It's like, there's no viable exit strategy.

You would be there fucking forever. Yeah. It's like asking a car salesman, like, well, when's the right time to buy a car? Like they're gonna say, oh, you know, you don't actually need one. Just use, just get a, no, if you need one, get a used car running into the fucking ground as we're right now.

Sure. Just bought a car. Well, you know, you can never buy too many new cars. Are you kidding with the rates the way they are? You're losing money by not buying a new car. You stupid fuck. If you wait till next year, you can't afford not to spend the money. Go out and vote by the way.

I got to show you this, one of the voting things. So that MIT, I mean, I think it would be. No politics. I think you'd be pretty fucking weirded out by this. That MIT, PhD, who's putting some of this stuff together, can you probably can't see it? Can you see the red and the blue on my screen? Red and the blue. It looks like it kind of looks like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I can't.

Yeah, so the red, the dark red on the top, the red is, the red is the dark red is Republican votes, like straight ticket on the voting machines. And the light red is Trump only. See how they kinda correlate, like you think, oh yeah, I mean, as the X-axis is Republican-ness of the county. So as the Republican-ness of the county increases,

the straight ticket votes increase and the Trump only votes increase. So it's like, either people voted straight ticket or they voted Trump. These are just two counties, by the way, Corley pretty well. And then Biden, this is the same kind of thing, but Republican-ness, as the Republican-ness grows, the straight ticket Democrats go down, but when they're at their most, let me see this.

Biden only hangs at that exact same, hangs around that exact same percentage for the entire county. So you're talking about down voting or down ballot. Yeah, this is the down ballot issue. And it's, I mean, I have a trouble finding like a lot of stuff on that. Well, I mean, that's it. I've looked in the last few days. I got to, if you want to watch it watch it, the, again, MIT, PhD,

goes through it and talks about why it's a statistical anomaly. It doesn't prove anything, obviously, but you look at this and think that is interesting. It just, it seems the straightness of the lines, the reliability of the data, of such a, the reliability of the data of such, of such a, the reliability of the data to not correlate with, um, with the other voting pattern, the, how it reliably does not correlate is very bizarre, uh, to me, looking at it in a couple different counties, like counties

where the, like, this is in Oakland and McComb County. And as the district, as the Republicanness of the district increases, the Democrat straight line voting went down, but the Biden votes, the Biden only were completely unchanged. Does that make sense? Like the light blue is Biden only totally unchanged. Yeah. Trump correlates with the Republicanness. Biden does not at all. That's the part in those counties. That's what doesn't make sense. It's that it's that it's that his is that Biden's ballot only, the Biden only ballots don't change it all, which I mean, obviously, yeah, I guess that's how it could have been, but it also could be that you know, who are just like, I don't know shit about shit. I know I don't want Trump.

Well, sure, but at the same exact percentage, like that's why I would believe it was one or two or three, but it's like, oh, I really need, I really need to see the source code of the voting machine that did this because if you've got some kind of weird fucked up ranking algorithm that like changes the value of votes going into the system and that is a documented feature in the system, I just want to see that it was turned off. That's all. I just want to see that the weighted ranking algorithm that you do have in the machine and that you requested that was in the machine and that is documented in the machine, I want

to see that it was turned off. That's step one. I just want to see that it was turned off. That's step one. I just want to see that it was turned off. And I want to know how easy it is to turn on. Because I think, I'm just an idiot, but I think that's what it would look like if it was on. Highly fucking suspicious. I know that I know how much damage one single graph can do in this world, but man, this is this is not I do not want to have our entire country relying on a black box, I guess.

I'll just leave it at that. A black box of forevoting. Anyway, sorry. That's right. Sorry, sorry, here we go. Let's see here. All right, all right, here we go. Let's see here. Oh, how about this one? Hi, Dick. You know what makes me rage? This is Ken from San Jose. Being woken up. I was sleeping soundly after turning in at six.

It was a long week. And a couple of hours later, my grandmother wraps loudly on the door and wakes me up to herang me for missing dinner. Actually, that kind of asked if mine in this from the elderly is more of an annoyance, but it reminded me what does make me rage. This entire boomomerocracy in which 90% of the wealth in this country is owned by people over 25, consequently the time when the netty-diffic rate rises. That should be a case. Something to which your audience can attest. And compounding that on the other side, the easiest consent, designs to protect our women from manipulation instead fortify them with

creeps and canines only to prepare them for Tinder, where they think they're entitled to the 10% of them who have proven themselves because some Chinese click farm told them their influencers with social standing. Oh boy. some Chinese click farm told them their influencers with social standing. Oh boy. By the way, get Sean out of the house. You act like you've never carried the virus before. Oh yeah, and don't fuck yourself.

I don't know how so all the time. What are you saying, don't what? I don't know. I don't know what the last thing, I don't know what the last thing he said was. So he's saying that I'm out of the house all the time. Sean's a mover and he's a jet-setter. He's out all the fucking time. One more. One more. It's what makes me a very dick. It's a Paul from another career.

What you're in for which didn't fire like for a British bake off but for that's called for on blacksmithing and these two guns make make their own sword and in the woods or the front trailer or whatever and they go to the studio do the test and there's a whole fucking ghost hanging it off the ceiling and thinking this is gonna be forks or something this they're gonna test those blades on the goats. If you be fuckin' brilliant, it's a great shell and a cart weight to fuckin' see. Doug McAver, slice that motherfucker into, and then attend that one of the heads didn't make the blade long enough.

So they're also might feel like the squall of the head. So therefore they lose no testing required. And I don't get to see a sword go for a fuckin' dead carcass on a cow's head or a a fucking polyblastic fucking dummy into the alternate cockies and a blue ball And I can't fucking see it and that's what makes me really cute. Look at work. And Broadway UK went in the fucking pandemic so that I can't even feel so sure. I have to say with that, I peanut on me you'd be to hope you've been being to laugh. He got blue-bulled.

Yeah, well, we have to do a road rage UK. It will happen. I hope so. I hope so. It will. It will, not soon enough, but it will. Did I talk about the broadsword that Rich brought to Burning Dick?

You mentioned it. I mentioned it. He brought this big fuck off broad sword there. And it was like, the hilt was wrapped with like duct tape or something. That's how you knew it was. So broad sword is, a broad sword is swung with two hands, right? Yeah.

Yeah. It had, it was like a baseball bat. You could grip it. So we were throwing pumpkins at each other and taking baseball swings with them. It was awesome. It was cool. It was cool. It was sharp as hell though.

I had to, I was being a real narc, telling people to put their weapons away at night because I didn't want anybody to lose a penis. All right, everybody. Yeah, no shit. See you later. Thank you, see ya. you