The Dick Show - Episode 241 - Dick on Insurrection

Episode Date: January 12, 2021

I eat a tub of cookie dough, the perils of shaving your ugly face, THOTs posting pictures of themselves in Dubai, rolling your own cigarettes, the pros of Trump being banned on Twitter, taking over the capitol and Opposite Day, Vito's podcast, two teenagers sexting, Ari's ex with the foot fetish, Cantillions and Matt fight, the Danish giant penis cartoon, turning a prostitute into a housewife; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Oh God, I got really fat over the holidays. Unacceptably fat. You gained some personality. I gained a lot of personality. A lot of personality. A lot. Yeah, I did too. Not that much, but where I can't justify like, oh, it's just water weight.

I ate some salt, you know? Like that kind of shit where I'm like, consistently in the morning, the scale is, yeah, is fucking a little higher than it ought to be. I feel like there's no stopping it now. Like I was on a point where I thought, oh man, there's, this weight is under control. It's trending down.

I got some serious mo in the downward direction, but now it's now it's out of control in the opposite direction. It's bad. Just let it ride. I'm gonna have to let it roll. Let it roll. I'll tell you what makes me a rage. Before we even start the show, I'm worried once the theme song starts, it's just going to get too political. And I can't, I do not want to even suffer one or two emails about how the show was too political this week. I got pre complaints. Oh, this week, I know, I know I'm sure you're going to, you're going to get one from me. Dick, Dick, you spent last week. It was nearly 40 minutes talking about politics.

Now I know the temptation might be great for you to talk about politics this week, but I must implore you, sir. I just, I don't even know if I'll listen if you'll talk about politics next week. I don't know, Dick, I don't know. One email, two emails. I don't know, I don't know man.

I don't know. What, yeah, see I mean, even complaining about it, I'm already getting into it. I know. What makes me rage is, you shave your face like I have done. Yes. I shave my face for the hell of it for new years, new year, new me, whoops, that didn't work, sorry. I shave my face, the hell of it for New Year's, New Year, New Me. Whoops, that didn't work. Sorry.

I shave my face. Not only do I get, not only do I get a hundred assholes telling me that my face looks ugly. I know. I know. I know these listeners watchers of the piano streams. Oh, which you should come and do one. I know. I should do one.

Not only do I get a hundred ass, telling me in their own unique way, how ugly my face is now that I've shaved it and that it's smaller. Any creative ways, you know, I mean, to know. Some people are pretty funny. You go, that's, okay, that's funny. Yeah. No.

The cameras are on. I'll hand Sean his. That's mine. This is Sean's. Okay, what's the difference? Sugar. Yeah'll hand Sean his. That's mine. Oh, this is Sean's. Okay. What's the difference? Sugar. Yeah. Sugar in your coffee. I never used to, but the holidays, man, the holidays got me. No wonder you're getting fat. What do you, what do you not put sugar in? Okay, the big bowl of soup. Would you put sugar in it? I only eat sweet soups.

I've been making a lot of, I've been making a lot of borscht at home and just, you know, sweeten it up. Yeah, sweeten it up. You know what this needs? I like the sweetensour sauce from McDonald's. Splendid ain't gonna do it. I need the real crack stuff.

You know what, I like this borscht, but could you throw some ice cream in here? A little bit, I like my soups, sweets. Have you ever had Borscht? Yeah, man, my mom's Russian, like black Russian from Lincoln, Nebraska. That's all those motherfuckers eat, is culvers. That's what they do every night is figure out. Is she Russian?

Is there going to eat from culvers? What do you want to do tonight? What do you want to do tonight, dad? They all call it no matter how old they are, or what their relationship is in Lincoln, Nebraska. Yeah. All of the men call the, all of the women call the men dad. Yeah.

Whether it's your son, or a teacher, a coworker, or whatever. It's, what do you want to do tonight, dad? What do you want to eat from culverts tonight, dad? Let's figure it out. Oh, I'll take some tasteless floppy meat. Is Culver's a chain?

Yeah, it's a chain. Tasteless floppy meat, like, is it all wear around their bodies? They wrap around their bodies and chain themselves to that the middle of the country, which I want to escape to now that California is going into the shitter. Anyway, what I was saying was, what makes me a rage is you shave your face.

Yes. And you're greeted by face shaming from other men. Yeah. Immediately face shaming, you're telling you how ugly you are. I know. I know. I know. I don't know why you might start wearing masks.

Believe me, guys, I am the ugliest person to me because I'm a man. So I have no interest in the way I look at all anyway. And I have to see, and I, this face is to blame for all of my failures in life. Real, there's no, well, what else could it be? You've narrowed it down to the face. You walk up to somebody, how are you doing? And they go, well, I mean, look at this. How are to somebody, how are you doing? Oh, and they go, well, I mean, look at this. How are you doing? How are you doing? Not well.

Yeah. Ugliest hell is the answer. Sorry, I asked. So after I get over that, I'm like, all right. Well, it's, it's growing back steadily. Don't worry about that. Man, there is a one-to-two-day period. And I'm, I'm guessing it's different for all men. There's one to two days after you've shaved your face where you wake up and you go to the mirror and you think, wow, I look great. I look really great today. This is a, look at this.

I look like a cartoon where the shade of the face is the stubble and it's not even individual hairs and it's not a gradient of grotesque pubecense that spread all over your face like acne instead of the beard, which is what you want. You know, with discolorations, it's not like black and white acne. It's actually a beard and you think, wow, I look like a, I look like Indiana Jones today. This is fucking great. I'm going to have a great day.

And then the next day you wake up and go to the mirror thinking, oh man, I'm going to look so great today. And you look like like a you look like a mug shot. Mmm. Yes, that's what it that's what it is That's the shaving your face. That's what makes me rage about shaving your face. That's it now. Let's get now Let's get into some serious politics I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die!

I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! No, it's a guy that's gonna be live around more good even harder to see failure. I mean, how's the maximum? It's $20 million, man, but our mayor's worse, Mexican 91 weeks running, joining me as always and as Corona Proof Studio.

As world tourling LA-based comedian, Sean the audio engineer, what's up, buddy? Hello, Dick. That is still an offensive intro. Hey, which part? LA-based comedian. Oh, it doesn't even make sense anymore, because you know what's what Twitter account.

Well, I have had one time, I was thinking about this on the drive over here for some reason. There's been one time, you know, in the run of this show or really in my life where somebody has like made a half-hearted swipe at cancelling me. Oh, yeah. And that's where that LA based comedian comes from. Wait, what? Also, what do you mean? What do you mean?

And let's stuff, you know, and LA based comedian comes from. Wait, what? Also, what do you mean? And let's stuff, you know, and LA based comedian, Shodget, right? Yeah, yeah. It was like, it's still sting, right? You motherfucker. Speaking of swipes, there's this, somebody sent me a podcast where two women are talking about the lawsuit and making fun of Maddox,

like two Australian women. Oh, great. And it's called Maddox versus love. So I don't know. I don't know what their take on it is. I haven't listened to it yet. That's the title or that's the crux of the show. That's the title of the episode is Maddox versus love. Very funny.

I'll tell you what else makes me a rage today, Sean. Oh, please do. Not the shaved face, not the journey of the shaved face, the shame of the shaved face. It's thoughts posting pictures of themselves and Dubai. I know, has this ever happened to you? Many times. Oh my God.

Why don't they just, they all do it. They all think they're being cute and showing you a foreign land, but it's just broadcasting. I got fucked by a chic for millions of for money that you don't have. For money that the government took from you and gave to the Middle East. That's what happened to me. And I'm his, his semen is floating around in my VJJ while I'm here squishing around while

I'm here on the beach posting pics of it for you. I can't get the idea out of my head now What else are you doing in Dubai? There's only one thing for hot girls to do in Dubai Fuck for a ton of monies. I don't have there is just ravi It's it's enough. It's enough that you put your tits on the internet and I can't touch them You know that's fine. All right. I'll give it to you. I'm still looking. I'm still looking I'm still getting enjoyment out of this jokes on you because I am I actually I'm doing this with A hundred other chicks. I'm looking at their tits too, so fuck you But it's another thing. It is an egregious breach of the parasocial relationship to then post pictures of yourself and Dubai you are you are

Getting fucked by a chic getting fucked by a chic that's a real fuck you just see men swimming around in the the squishing around simpson from the beaches getting mixed in with the same already in their building i.e.d.s these the

the the sperm building eyes radical eyes and i'm a drawer in the bathroom honey that that makes thoughts in Dubai that's what makes me a ray and and then they have the audacity the audacity to post some inspirational shit like leave footprints of love and kindness wherever you go bitch we

are facing that we are facing down a dual insurrection we are looking at a dual insurrection in the total usurpation of the voice of the people in america and you're telling me to leave footprints of kindness wherever I go while you're fucking a billionaire in the Middle East, fuck you! Get some fuck, put some fucking perspective on when you're done getting fucked you bitch! I don't know if they have that deep a thought process. Ah! The thought, the thought process does not go that deep. God, damn it. I go online for one thing. And one thing only from you, broads online. One thing only. Don't fucking push it.

That's it. Don't you fucking push it. Let me see if is everything working. Should be. Yeah. I mean, I, yeah, I got signal. Thoughts in Dubai. All right. Hey, you know, I'll tell you what else makes me ready. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah, store bought cigarettes. Oh, man.

What have you been rolling your own weight? 80s girl picked up rolling her own cigarettes. Keon was with this girl. Keon brought this girl around a long time ago and she handled cigarettes. And I was just sitting practically in her lap like a dog. Right. Like it was a roll man. Santa Claus.

Yeah. Santa Claus ready to show you the method of personal cigarette rolling. I was like, Wimpy. Excuse me, ma'am. Could I trouble you for another? Could I just have one more of these delightful hand-rolled cigarettes again? I think 80s girls saw this. And I won't pay you Tuesday.

I won't pay you Tuesday. You'll never get paid. I will sit in your lap. She started rolling them. And they're all, first of all, they're tiny. You roll them in their tiny so your hands feel like normal size. Well, my hands feel like normal size. You can handle the cigarettes.

It's wonderful. Right. And they're never ending because they're handmade. So you could eat. It's like a woman offering you a plate of cookies, right? Yes. You go to the cabinet and you start dipping into the fig newtons or the chips of hoi. The fig newtons? Yeah. Yeah. Or the chips of hoi. You have chips of hoi. Chips of hoi.

Yeah. Only the chewy ones. Fuck the regular ones. Oh, fuck the regular ones that are like eating dice. Yeah, fuck those. Crumbly ass, they're like, it's like the worst Danish cookie ever with chocolate chips in it. No, you can go, if you're trying to push regular chips of hoi, then you can go fuck yourself.

Chewy, chewy only. But you go to, then she makes some cookies. She'll bite your head off if you eat too many of those. She'll come at you screaming, stop eating so many cookies, you fat fuck. But if she makes the cookies, you could eat as many as you want. You know, yes, that's true. That is true. So, oh man, I just can't stop.

Just give me the cookie dough next time. I'll just eat that. This is just, this is great. I would actually prefer eating chocolate chip cookie dough to chocolate chip cookies. I want eight half of a tub of cookie dough, thinking that it was cookie dough ice cream. I remember that.

My sister was selling that. I remember that story. My sister was selling them for softball or something because they didn't have only fans of Jesus, a teenager. Yeah, it's something cookie dough. You got this out of the freezer. I got it out.

Yeah, I got it out of the freezer. Okay, good. Because then it was like, the fridge should have tipped you off if you got it out of there. Yeah, it was, it was not completely my fault. Okay. So I got the frozen, were you wondering where like the cream might have been? You know what I said out there. This is very, wow, it's real, must be really dense.

It's just been a jerry. It was all frozen. So I was like, all right, it's ice cream, right? It started eating, oh, cookie dough ice cream. Awesome. I saw cookie on it or something in the freezer. I'm like, yeah, I'll say no more. Say no more, I'm in. Cookie freezer must be ice cream. I get through half of it or something in the freezer. The guy, yeah. Say no more. Say no more, I'm in. I'm in.

Cookie, freezer, must be ice cream. I get through half of it and I put it away and she goes like, you ate half of that and I said, yeah, you know what the damn this thing? There's no cookie dough in this cookie dough ice cream. She goes, what? Are you serious? Yeah.

Isn't that fucked? You guys are, I don't know where you got this. She goes, that is, it's entirely cookie dough, bro. How did you think that was not cookie dough? I don't know. To this day, I don't know where you got this, because that is, it's entirely cookie dough, bro. How did you think that was not cookie dough? I don't know, to this day, I don't know. I was just sitting there eating it. And but by the same principle, you could smoke infinity of your wife

or girlfriend's hand rolled cigarettes. Because- No, because it's a compliment every time you do. Oh, honey, right? These are the tightest, oh my God, look at the, oh yeah, give me four more of those things. So she's in there like the uniformity of the role. She's like a Cuban slave.

So they burn so even. And they're rolling cigarettes while I'm screaming about congressional representation on the kill stream. Yes. On Friday night, was it? Oh my God, I got the perfect amount of drunk. I got 3% 1776 drunk. And I was screaming on the kill stream for like an hour about how completely fucked

Congress is and how there's no representation there. Well, that's every protest all year has been about the exact same thing. A lack of representation is in Congress and feeling completely out of control when it comes to your government for the common man. Screaming it. Well, you know, said it was inspirational. We're not, we are horribly underrepresented. The war on terror, though, Sean, is coming home.

Yeah, it's about time. What do you, you get? I did see a bunch of pressure cookers upstairs. But I thought that was maybe a mistake, but I say, yeah, I mean. Those are BLM pressure cookers. They are, okay. Those are only to be used for purposes of social justice. Okay.

You know what really honestly makes me a rage about the whole thing? What? Is this whole, and I like, I know that it has to be done, but it still, it sticks in my craw like nothing else. When I see people go, oh well, isn't it ironic that liberals are allowed to shoot me with a firing squad and we are not allowed to shoot them. How curious.

Like, motherfucker, stop pointing out the hypocrisy. It's like watching a roadrunner cartoon. Like, you just want to scream at the coyote. Just don't play the song. Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da. Don't play it. Don't fucking play it. The roadrunner man is not to play it. You don't play it. And you cringy, you can't walk like, oh, you don't fucking point out the hypocrisy. Don't point out the fucking hypocrisy. Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, Point out that the BLM protests and riots were deadly and were dangerous were dangerous to some degree happened all year long with the support of the government. And then one day, a one day of a self-guided tour through the Capitol. Sean, the bison guy was going to call in today.

I texted him because he was at the Arizona stop to steal thing. Yeah. And he was gonna call in today, and the whole time I was thinking, please don't get arrested on Monday. Please don't get arrested on Monday. Please don't get arrested on Monday last night. Boom, arrested. No!

Well, close. Maybe when he, you know, when he's out on bail, he might have enough buffalo blankets to trade for, you know, like a, he's to rest or something. He's going to get Mo, Sean. I don't think you understand. I think you're terrorists. God, this is a terrorist insurrection. It's the only insurrection in history that was quelled by the unstoppable force of being

bored after 40 minutes and going home and having something to eat. Oh boy, well this tour of the Capitol sure was fun. The self-guided tour. I'm just going to take this podium and go home. See you guys. Oh, the insurrection! They almost stole our drawer full of worthers originals, candy.

These terrorists My mouth is full of nose These Trump fuel terrorists canceled Trump's Spotify He's gonna create, he's gonna take, he's gonna sit on the shit of all day Crafting the most devastating rock and thumb album and spread it to these terrorists And they're gonna get so fueled up, they're gonna go into a berserker rage and force Congress to stop sending money to Israel

that we have to arrest them all immediately. Get rid of them! Peppered Fom remembers. I feel like I have a sort of insane manias, like Saddam Hussein in the South Park movie where he comes out with a martini going, yeah, I really fucked now. Come on guy. Come on.

Quill by boredom. I don't know. This is what happens when you close the court. I'm pretty sure I learned from the people's court from Doug Luelland when he said, don't take the law into your own hands, take him to court. Yeah. Right. Do you remember that? I do. Yeah. court from Doug Louellen when he said, don't take the law into your own hands, take him to court. Right. Do you remember that?

I do. Yeah. I learned that from him. I learned that from watching you, dad. So when you, when you don't give people their day in court, I thought this was what I thought this is why we had courts, not just to, not just to get gay married, but to let people who, who let's say they're just insane and all their evidence is a bunch of garbage, right?

To let them go in there, say it, let them talk it out. And then for a judge, an old black guy from the Simpsons to go, case dismissed, this is all garbage case dismissed. You had your day in court where a society of memes, Sean, you, and when you take away the meme of you had your day in court, this is what you get. Well, there's a violence and insurrection. There's a process to getting your day in court if you're those people. Oh, there's a pretty gorgeous. I just had to say, yeah, we hear it.

It's garbage. See, but instead they said, no, now we can't do it. We can't do it because it's a state. Well, it's a state thing. It's like a whole, that doesn't rhyme though. I can't, I can't fend off an unruly mob with, well, you know, it's like a whole, that doesn't rhyme though. I can't, I can't fend off an unruly mob with, well, you know, it's like a state thing and jur- Oh yeah, jurus my diction, how about that? See, that's a meme.

Let's catch your. Jurus my every single fucking movie. Fuck these, fuck these guys in there. Jurus my diction, crap. Jurus my diction. That's from the Matrix. Is it really? I don't remember that. Right at the beginning

when Agent Smith says, Armin, I'll take it from don't give you take that jurors my addiction crab you can stick it up your ass. How about I give you the finger and you give me my phone call before that the first the first line when agent Smith rolls up to the cops and goes you're an, your men are already dead. That part. So Trump's off a Twitter, right? Yes. Which I kind of liked in a way that I could imagine

for the first time what Trump was feeling at that moment. Like I know what that's like. I know what that feeling's like, buddy. Yeah, you do. I'm there for you. I'm like that. Those arts where it's like Jesus is trying to stop you from doing heroin or they were doing it in Jesus's arms. Yeah, like do. I'm there for you. I'm like that, those arts where it's like Jesus is trying to stop you from doing heroin

or that you're doing it in Jesus' arms. Yeah, like those drawings, those Christian drawings where it's like, Jesus is behind you. If your, his arm is your arm when you're shooting up it's like, if you're writing alone, you're writing with Hitler. Yeah, exactly. That's how I felt right there.

Like, ah, he's, Trump sees the same thing on his Twitter app as I see in mine. You are suspended. You're practically kin. You did. Yeah, we're the same guy in that moment. Ah, if you're like more information on you, so you don't know that feeling to you, Sean.

Well, no, you've only gotten my accounts banned. You don't know what it's like. I never will, but me and Trump. Not like that. No, no, no, on Twitter. Of course, it's a private business. Private business. Twitter, uh,

cancel alcohol. You can't do, you, a woman can't do another woman's hair in her private business, but yet, yet throngs of useful morons will stack on top of each other like World War Z to cram that meme down your throat It's a private fucking business. It's a private business that can't be sued like a private business It's a private business while your while your private business has to dress in a Pentium has mad suit to serve a drink Outside in the street on a fucking picnic table, but in that, but that, that's just a pride, that's Twitter's just a private business, that's all, that cannot be sued, that can do

whatever they want during a pandemic, that lets the fucking Ayatollah from Iran run a muck on its system threatening war against America, but it's just a private business doing private business things. No big deal, no big deal at all. The Iatola has a Twitter account. Yes. That's. Yes. That's the funniest thing I've heard in like months.

Yeah. They're like, they're on there. Where's it like? And fuck this Quiggle Vision writing real. I told her. At real. I told her. Oh, that's amazing. That's fucking amazing. Oh, God.

I don't know. I've probably given my reaction to this on so many different streams on the show included. The, the, who are these podcast? By the way, who are these podcasts? Bonus episode up right now. It's fun. Patreon.com slash the dick show. Bonus episode, friend of me is Carl. It up right now. It's fun. Patreon.com slash the dick show. Bonus episode, friend of me is Carl.

It happened right then. And I remember my reaction was something like those pictures of Congress cowering on the floor and somebody going, hey, you know all that, you know all that, you know that one and a half trillion dollars, you guys sent to the devil, basically burned. Those guys that you took it from outside. Oh shit!

Don't, some of them can no longer afford hand-rolled cigarettes. Gosh, gosh, shoot one of them and show them we mean business. Oh no, that's what they want. That's what they want. You forgot, you guys forget, we're in a performative victim, we're in a society of performative victimization. That's what they want, don't be silly. Don't be silly.

School gets rated by an angry mob. You think, oh God, no, oh no. A dollar tree gets rated by an angry mob. Oh no! No, Congress rated by an angry mob. Really? Well, where can I see that? But I guess I don't know, I'll tell you the truth.

I don't even know if it's safe to express. The sort of support that I expressed for BLM during the summer, you remember that? I guess you did. I went there. I rioted. I mean, pro-sister. Yeah. I guess that they have legitimate grievances. Well, yeah.

And it will fail ultimately, but that the people in charge should be afraid of BLM. Do you remember me saying that? Yeah, I do. Do you think everybody should think on me for saying fuck the police and BLM is right? Well, what's about, well, yeah, but will it ultimately fail? It seems like some things, you know, it changed doesn't normally happen like snap your fingers and bam. It should.

Well, yeah. It should. It's a trick. It's a lie to say it's coming. Well, lockdown's ending soon. Well, I know. I know we're in Iraq as ending soon. People forget, yeah.

People forget very easily. It is ultimately pointless. And I think my brain changed gears after seeing Trump take an off of line and watching all of the protesters be called straight up terrorists and insurrectionists. Watching parlor now, the competitor to Twitter get the same treatment.

What happened to GAB? So all of these companies that are trying to take on big tech monopolies, they get the same treatment that I got, which is, or de-platform from everything, and then the banks de-platform you. So GAB doesn't have banking ability. It's not crazy. Everybody gets fucked in the end, except the people with the monopoly. You know what's funny is that was the part I found funny, um, most, I don't know. That

was the part that snapped my brain the most about the capital protest was all the senators talking about how violence was never the answer, like less than a week after they approved a one and a half trillion dollar violence bill. Like, you guys are, you guys entire business is violence. You're the government. You have monopoly on violence. It's like, like you talking about other people doing violent. It's just like, yeah, you're the, you're the, you're the, it's like a, it's like a, it's like a war.

Like all that kind of stuff. Yeah, it's like big tobacco saying hand rolled cigarettes are bad for you. Yeah. No, no, no, they're bad for you, but you guys are death merchants. Like you're saying this because you're afraid of a little competition. It's, you know, who was the first person to really warn about, you know, about the business of war was, uh, Eisenhower, Oh, Eisenhower. And who better, who better than like, you know, the highest general in the land to show you, to tell

you about the potential dangers of what's coming? Yeah. Yeah. It's, do you know that Oppenheimer, after he built a bomb, he didn't want them to use it as a doomsday device, so they tried him as a communist, and as an anti-American. The man who single-handedly basically invented the atomic bomb for the US was tried as a communist, and he was certainly a key player.

Trader. I mean, it was his. He's like, he is to the atomic bomb what Elon Musk is to space X. Yeah, I guess that's true. Yeah, because I'm thinking of Teller, but that was the hydrogen bomb. No, Teller was evil.

Teller came in, Teller specifically went to Truman and set Oppenheimer up as the bad guy. So Teller could just build bigger and bigger doomsday devices. Yeah, Oppenheimer said, Well, that building a doomsday device is retarded. This should be a battlefield nuke. Like this should be a battlefield weaponday device is retarded. This should be a battlefield nuke. Like this should be a battlefield weapon that you use tactically.

This should be a tactical nuke. Yeah, he did have a, he did disparage Oppenheimer. Yeah, quite a bit. It's the double standard people that are getting on my nerves. Well, why is it okay that you can arrest me for treason and shoot me in front of a firing squad and I can't do it to you. Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen, don't you think it's funny that don't you think it's funny that they can they can close that they can murder you, but you can't

but yeah, man, we got it. We got it. It's fucking not we got it. What's the deal with firing squads? We got it. It's fucking not we got it. What's the deal with firing squads? I mean, uh, Washington DC, the DC stands for doesn't condone. How about that for a growner? We don't condone. A bunch of, a bunch of congressmen sitting in a city named after a man who led and armed into-insurrection over a tyrannical government to found a new country talking about violence isn't the answer. How is that for comedy for you folks? But I'm bummed. From Washington, D.C.,

you're sitting in a city named after a fucking terrorist. Holy shit, I disavow everything. I have to disavow everything I'm saying because I'm terrified. Disavow, very unhealthy. Yeah, my brains really changed gears. The only way forward is crypto did hurt. Luckily, I had a shitload of liquor to take me through it.

Oh, good. Crypto and the ratification of the original First Amendment. That's it. And that's luckily. Luckily, that can be done at a local level. Is it all right? Congress for that. Yeah. Ratified amendments. Oh, yeah. Amendments go through, go through the states, motherfucker. So the states have to ratify it. Yeah. Congress think it to do shit.

Well, it doesn't have to know, man. For states, it doesn't have to be brought before Congress. Like it already was. It already was. It already was in like in 1780 and 11 states ratified it. So it's already been presented. So then, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, we just need 28 more states to do it. And I don't know. I don't know. You know, statute of limitations or anything like that.

No, no, no, the 27th Amendment. That's interesting. So the original Bill of Rights had 12 amendments in it. And one, number one, excuse me, number one was congressional representation. Can't go above 60,000. One per every 60,000 people. Oh, is that what it was? Yeah.

60,000, not 30,000. For some reason, it climbed. It climbed. They had it in the text that it started at 30, got to 50, and it got to 60. So we should have, I think we should have 5,000 more reps, which means that we should have 2,500 more women in congress and i don't know a thousand two hundred more black people in minorities in congress and uh... couple hundred days there's got to be a couple hundred more gay congressman right

that's a set there's a win for everybody it's a fucking win for everybody boy they don't get anything done now uh... that's by design. This sure shareholders of Berkshire Hathaway, they can shit done. There's thousands of them. They hold votes all the time. Fucking it happens all the time. I will be damned if I'm going to be brainwashed out of this one.

Anyway, what the hell was I saying? Oh yeah, number one, congressional representation. Number two is the salaries of Congress don't kick in until the next year. Uh-huh. They didn't ratify that one. A kid in the early 80s, 19 year old kid got so pissed off that a teacher marked him down for his, for a paper he wrote on how that should be ratified and it could still be ratified to this day, that he spent like a year getting it ratified. Then that's called the 27th Amendment. Wow. Yeah.

Wait a minute, I think I knew that. I heard that story. That's an animal fact that you knew. Very good. Well, I don't know. It's familiar. I'm fucking feeling frisky. There's no point in voting anymore if the pandemic coup that started with mail-in ballots

and propagated through election fraud let uh... governors that wouldn't let legislators vote to send alternative electors to congress uh... investigative agencies that refused to fucking investigate fraud yet they would spend weeks and millions and dollars on a garage poll that some ignorant moron thought was a new all the way up to the supreme court rejecting case. What the fuck is the point of voting?

So something to do on a Tuesday? By the way, here's something funny. Here's something actually funny. I was on Vito's show. Actually funny. Yeah, this is other stuff. Wait, Vito has a show. Vito has a show now. He does. Yeah, it's funny listening to him like, I wanna go on Vito's show. Oh, dude, you should. It's funny being on someone else's show, first of all.

I'll bet. It's hard for me to do that though. You're on other people's shows. That's true, but he's like, he's liberal and nice. Yeah. It's like a real nice atmosphere. I'm sure he is not liberal enough for a lot of people. Oh, no, they hate him.

Yeah. I can see, yeah. There's no way he's liberal enough. He's actually liberal. That's why. Well, yeah. He's not like about identity politics. No.

About all that crazy shit. So of course they hate him. What was I saying? Oh, yeah. So it was on his show. Yeah, I was on his show. Yeah. I think I was kind of mean to one of his guests actually. Oh, really? Yeah. What was I saying? Oh, yeah. So I was talking, I was on Vito show. Yeah. And an election, one of the election like watchers called in, one of those guys whose job it is to check you in and like make sure there's no fraud happening, right?

Well, yeah, there's representatives from Republicans, Democrats, and many independents who are allowed to watch the, the counting what's up, the quiet two. Absolutely. So he called in and he's, I don't know how to describe guys who follow the rules. Like I always get the same, like guys who are like, it's their trusted with like a referee. They have the same kind of,

same kind of like neutrality to them. Yeah, I can never place or have a word for it. Maybe it's called, oh shit, I think he thought tonight. Hold on one second, I hope I didn't say PM. What would be 10 AM? I just thought she was a raging alcoholic.

Like, a noon bro. He thought it was like 11 or 12 midnight? I don't know, I said, I always say noon for that reason instead of 12 PM. Yeah. Because then people think, well, yeah. I mean, he's local, right? Yeah.

Maybe he'll come in next week. Are he still coming in? Oh, okay. Well, then I can probably come out of my ISO booth. Why not? Sorry for the mists. Sorry for the mists. Communication.

Don't you hate apologizing for something that you shouldn't have to apologize for? No, I don't care at all. Yeah, I believe that. I mean, I'll say whatever you want to hear. That's important to look at apologies to me in that way. It's something you, we do so much to just keep society moving. Sure.

That's all I see it as I don't see it as something that you have to genuinely mean at all. That's it. Well, I think I I Well, even if you're apologizing to your wife, nobody always means their apologies. I like to I split with you there a little bit Where yeah, because I because it means that I read it if I had it if I have something to apologize for I read it if I had a, if I have something to apologize for, you know, like it's, you got to look at yourself and go, what, you know, was I, was I at fault for that? Was I, but it's like something like this, yes, but even this is an ins and seropology,

it's just a, it's just a social norm. Hey, sorry for the miscommunication. Oh, all right, but even then, yay! Okay, so tear down this wall, Mr. Gorbachev. Oh, I understand that the government was overrun by terrorists, but if the government of Venezuela had been defrauding its citizens for so long, I love rejecting their cries to audit an election that is,

even if it's not fraudulent, show your work, please. You know, if this happened in another country, this happened in Russia, for example. If what happened? You said, well, can you show us how there's no fraud? Like you have all the balance stuff, can you show it? No, we're not gonna do that. If Russia said, you know what,

hey, guys, we're going to print one and a half trillion dollars. They've done hand recounts. No, but that's not an audit. An audit is taking. There are three audits. You have to take the signatures and say, which is which? They found two mismatched, uh, two mismatched signatures in Georgia. That's impossible. Two. That's impossible. It's impossible. Even if even if they were all correct, that's impossible. Like this, there is, you know, you don't understand what I mean. Three, dude, three audits, including a hand recount. The machines were accurate. Sean, no machine on earth. People couldn't be that accurate. No machine on earth has that

amount of accuracy. No, they, they're with people right there, right there, a very small, very small margins. Like it doesn't change it a few, a few votes one way or the other. If you gave, you said it's never going to be perfect. There's human error. If you, if you told me one million, if you told one million people to sign their name twice, you would have a greater margin of error for that on just that instruction. They would sign their name and then forget. Or they were just right. What was I supposed to do?

Yes, this is what I'm saying. To, by the way, I saw somebody did theirs on purpose. They did it wrong. They signed their name and then they signed a totally different name and they did it and said they didn't get caught. Oh my God, well, I mean, yeah. Anyway, if it was happening in Russia,

if there was any kind it was happening in Russia, if there was any kind of stuff happening in Russia, I'm saying I would say, Ha, ha, ha, awesome. Drag all of those motherfuckers, all of the Russian Congress or China, China, you guys are throwing wiggers in re-education camps and bragging about it in China. Yeah, you know that.

It's, you can't, you can't be that. Wigger, Muslim? Oh, the different Wigger. Yeah, that's a, I'm very confused. I'm very confused. Doorags in China. I, I, I, I, I, I've honestly never been so baffled

on this show. It's spelled it, it, it, Oh, the U I G H Y S wait, the U.I. G.H. Y.S. has pronounced wigger. Wow. Yeah. So they're rounding up white guys. Right. Who don't have belts. And we're doing a pro right and say, no, I'm saying too much.

Gulog's full of vanilla ises. Yes. Vanilla ice clones. I would say that those citizens should storm the Congress and take all of those guys in China. Make sure you bring your fucking boom boxes. Okay, what was I saying? Oh, yeah. So the guy, the election fraud guy, right? The election, what election fraud?

The guy who monitors it, right? Yeah. He was talking to on Vito's show. He called in. Yeah. And he's, and Vito says, all right, so tell us, I wanna know from you personally, you're a guy who runs this kind of thing. Is it possible?

He's a watcher, he's a watcher, and he does it, he's familiar with all the systems, every system there, and he said, which, very rare. I don't know for sure one way or the other on that. He would say, I know the machine, I don't know for sure if it does that at the other when I was asking him stuff. So, I mean, that is a quality one in a million.

You cannot find with men. Well, he's not an electronic voting machine expert, right? He's a guy who is a proctor. He's a guy who watches, is he a Democrat or a Republican or a... Did I say? Oh, never occurred to me actually. Yeah. So, if you don't ask them, so could you fake votes? Is it possible?

You thought about it for a while. And he walked through the systems one by one. Yeah. And he said, so, you know, I think, no, you wouldn't be able to. And I said, okay, I'll listen to your, I should be able, I'll listen to your description. Peace by peace.

Yeah. Let me ask you this. Let's say I work there and I do this. I do this. I do this. I do this. You work there and you let's say I'm a guy working at your level in the voting thing, precinct, right? Yeah.

What is his, he's a guy with the pad that checks you in and gives you your thing. Oh, he's a, make sure, he makes sure that there's no fraud happening, right? Well, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, sure. Oh, he makes sure that there's no fraud happening, right? Like, well, no, no, no, no. And the check's a balance. Oh, you're talking about, oh, I'm sorry. For some reason, I'm thinking he's a,

when the votes are being counted. No, no, yeah, that's the same day. Count the votes on voting day. Well, I mean, just what, why is this not making sense? What am I explaining to the property? No, what is his process? I mean, what does he, those are different people normally.

The guy who counts, the guy who, the people who watch the counters. He's the guy who watches the counters and watches people checking in. Okay, like he does have special cards. Okay, yeah, so they know how everything works and their job is to make sure that someone's fucking around. I understand.

And Vida said, well, could you do anything wrong? And he went through it all and he goes, no, I gotta say, I mean, I'm not gonna say it's impossible, but based on what I know, I couldn't do. I couldn't do any kind of illicit shit. Yeah, no fraud. I couldn't do that. So, all right, how about this? You got the pad, start typing in random names, right? Cause that was part of it. Start, like, you know, John Smith, SM, I williams, that's a, Johnson, things just go through names. You have to three letters, and it pops up and you pick one, right? And I say, then it says verify the address and pops the address and you say, yes, that's it.

Then it gives you a ballot, right? And you go, well, yeah. And I say, well, then you fill out the ballot and you put in the machine there, you go, that's about. Yeah, you could do that. So, I understand you couldn't, but in what I just described I would do as a bad actor, could I get away with that?

And he goes, yeah. It was, the funny part to me was, if don't have a if you're not a if you don't identify as a criminal I don't think you should have it. I don't think you need to weigh in on this exact in 10 minutes I figured out how to start casting fake ballots That was what was funny to me is like all you had to do is describe to me the system immediately Immediately it can be broken, fucking immediately. You're never gonna stop all fraud.

I just thought it was funny that the guy running is like, well, no, like, well, in 10 minutes anyway. Ha. Not good to see what shirt you're wearing. Legalized gains. Legalized gains. Legalized them while you can. Why, where did that come from?

And why is it... Somebody sent it to me. Somebody sent it. Legalized gains, like, was there ever a, is it because gyms were closed down or something? No, I think it's just a meme. I don't know. It's kind of a cool, I like it. It's kind of a cool shirt.

I just don't quite know what it means, but is it it like say, Hey, legal, let men be men. I don't think I think it's just a a rhyme. I think it's just a pun. That's not a rhyme. Uh, legalize, what is it from legalize? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't remember what it's from. That's just Detroit. It's because I'm missing Leg Days this day. Mm. It's just a shirt on how to be a man, man. Leg days are soul crushing, man. I know. I got one of those boxing bags that you have.

You did? Yeah. Do you like it? I haven't used to get it. Dude, it will make your hand eye coordination like come back to like when you were, you're like, oh shit, this is what I kind of used to feel like. Yeah.

Because the thing, you know, it doesn't go straight back and forth. Depending on how you hit it. And it will come and it's like, yeah, it's a lot of fun. I'm looking forward to it. I'm gonna feel it was sand too. I'm not sure I have to do it in mine. That's what I have to do to mine. Well, it was something, I didn't get any sand.

I didn't get any sand. I didn't get any sand. Oh God, here was another thing that made me rage. Let me see here. A guy, a kid got accused of this is a real thing now. This poor kid, YouTube guy was sexting one of his fans. This got leaked as like a big, but you know how everybody's everybody.

Their favorite thing is to find a new pedophile. Like, that seems to be pretty hot shit right now, right? You're a teenager and you find a new band. That's the rights racist, right? Yeah. Uh huh, yeah. You're a teenager and you find a new band, you're like, oh yeah, let me get into this new band.

What are the hits? What was their album before? What's their old stuff? The news, then the news stuff kind of sucks. Like, I remember that one too. That's an amazing feeling where you're like, how did I not know about this? You tell all your friends.

This was recorded when? Elliot Smith, he's got to eat more up. Oh my God, he teamed up with who? Oh, give me that. When you turn 30 as a man, or when you turn, when you're no longer a teenager as a man, that same thing is for pedophiles. So if you find, so whenever a guy, a man finds a new pedophile,

he's like, whoa, I gotta get, what else is this guy done, man? Tell me about his classics. What's he working on now? I gotta know, that's just the happiest I've ever been in my fucking life, done man. Tell me about his classics. What's he working on now? I got to know. I got this is the happiest I've ever been in my fucking life, finding a new pedophile to obsess over. So this poor kid called call me Carson. Some some bitch outed him for being a straight man. Oh no. Sexting with her when she was 17. Yeah. And he was 19. Yeah. Yeah. I know. It's one of those 17 and 19.

I know. And people lost their fucking minds about that. This is a man, he's now 21, by the way. If one of you cannot rent a car, you're minors. If one of you can both minors. If one of you is able to and the other one isn't, well, actually, then that could be 24 or 26. If one of you is able to and the other one isn't, well, actually, then

that could be, that could be 24, 26. If you can't, if you can't tell me, if you can't say a whole sentence to me without breaking eye contact, you're a child. I think that's probably true. And that's both of you, 17 and fucking 19, sexting to each other. And 40 year old men like Keemstar are throwing, are throwing tantrums over it for God knows what reason. Because of the, then this is the best part. They won't say, they won't call him a pedophile because they know how fucking dumb that sounds. He's older now, but they were uncut.

21. He's 21. So this is a 21 year old kid facing this, this, and this mob of insanity. Man, I'm just showing it for being a straight fucking man, a straight fucking 19 year old, texting with a 17 year old, who the bitch put them on blasts in the first place, saying that she was grown,

these are words that children are using, because it's like, it's like the South Park molestered episode. They just heard the word and that they're using it. And then it was, yeah, tumbleweeds through the's like the South Park molestered episode. Yeah. They just heard the word and they're using it. And then it was, yeah, tumbleweeds through the streets of the South Park. Ha, ha, ha. What? So, what it went on for a while.

And then all of a sudden, somebody got in or ear or something. It's like, oh my God, you're good. Oh, it's cause they don't, women put straight men, women out men for being straight, cause they didn't get the money in the relationship. They wanted, which means they didn't get the money and they didn't get the relationship they wanted, which means they didn't get the money and the fame they wanted. Fucking nobody outs us.

Fucking been out. What is terrifying? That's true. Yeah, you. My reputation is pristine. Yeah, you're one. Mine's garbage. I don't want any.

I don't want anybody. Oh, he's a scumbag. Oh, that guy that says, the guy that pretends that the HL men can quote that all women are the same and love is the delusion that they're not is his own quote and rephrases it. That guy's a scum. I didn't know that was a surprise. No, I think you gave him credit when you said it, I think. So then they said, then they come out of this one that it's not grooming or pedophilia.

Which it obviously is not, that it's the power. This is a new thing. Power differential. Well, that's, yeah, yeah, sure. Well, because he's right. That's not all the power. Right. And that's what rape, it's a power thing.

It's a, it's rape. Oh, it was rape. No, just, I'm just saying, that's always what, that's the next sentence after you, somebody brings up rape. Power differential. Well, you know, it's not a sex thing, it's a power thing. Because he's famous. Yeah. Power differential. Well, you know, it's not a sex thing. It's a power thing. Because he's famous. Taking advantage.

You see, because women are so bad, women are so empty in their heads that if they talk to a man who's famous, they'll do anything. That's why it's up to the man who's famous and powerful to not take advantage of that. It's very misogynistic. It's very misogynistic. It's true. That is a, yeah, that is a really, it's a very present, you know, thought these

days. That's it. That's at the forefront of what a lot of people think about. How are differential? A lot of people talk. Is it? It's a fucking power differential to be a fan of someone's, as this girl at work, she's not very empowering for the woman. Yeah, it really isn't. It's also, yeah. I don't really think it exists either because the only thing that would explain how women are able to exist while being so obnoxious and so unable to do anything is that they have all the power in every relationship. Otherwise, it wouldn't make any otherwise. They'd have

to learn how to screw on a fucking lid if there wasn't a power differential, but while they can exist in a, well, while they can exist on a continuum of complete uselessness and annoyance, I'm going to have to say they're the ones with the power in every fucking relationship. That was like vintage dick show right there. I just can't take a 19 year old girl. I mean, it all goes, uh, Jesus Christ.

Did you see all the people thinking that the guy carrying the podium out of the Senate was named Via Getty? No, no, I didn't see that. You didn't? Via Getty, why? Because the pictures of him were posted on the internet with the watermark Via Getty. Oh, oh, Getty Images.

Oh, God. Oh, I didn't know. I'm thinking an Italian name or Via Getty. So are they? Yeah. Via Getty. Yes, we? Yeah, that's Via. Via, Gettie. Yes, we see this.

Gettie images. Oh God. Viegetti. Well, let me find some of this. People on Twitter. Oh yeah, yeah, you can. Oh, thanks. People on Twitter think Via Gettie is the name

of the capital writer. And you think that all of these people sign two names correctly when they think Viegetti is the man's name That is for some for some reason Watermarked on the picture in a nice and it is though and that has never happened before in your life Where have you seen a news picture and then it's like well don't know people don't know stock image sites like us Viegetti one of the rioters steals a podium from the Capitol. Twitter responded to the puss.

I just don't want to live anymore. Ha, ha, ha, ha. I mean, that's hilarious. Oh, here's a bunch of them. God, that's funny. See, you are, your account is suspended and not permitted Trump sees that when he logs in. Yeah.

Ah, we're the same. And boom, we got one of these Maga Cheds, Viegetti. Look him up. I bet he flunked out of high school and fucks his sister. Viegetti. That is his name. Let us get this guy and serve justice. Are you not a little worried about people who think Viegetti is a name and now have

the full force of the US government behind them. Dick, there is no endless, there's an endless list of things I am worried about that people do. I want Viegetti and everyone else who participated in this domestic terrorism at the capital today arrested and prosecuted into the right, and Mr. Shutterstock. He's going down. This Viegetti guy is in deep shit. Yeah, you're right. As Viegetti been arrested. Yeah, that's, that's damn funny. Never fuck fans. Can't imagine saying it.

What you can't imagine saying never fuck fan imagine a person. imagine saying never fighting. I can't imagine a person. What, it's these needs, it's the needs and the feminists and the Islam's all meeting back in the middle. All the fundamentalist control freaks meeting back in the middle, wanting to control what men do with their dicks. Hmm, it's unfortunate. It's unfortunate.

Ah, let's see here. Trans athletes. Those are always a favorite of mine. I don't know why I care so much, but there is. I love knowing, I love facts, I love history. I just, I find all that stuff interesting, you know, records and what do you records? Like historical records, historical records going all the way back, you know, the different baseball records, things like that. Oh, yeah, you do. Yeah. Time of the sword is dead by the way. I know.

Yeah, 93. You know, he had a heart attack in like his 60s. I really, he's a fat Italian guy. He's probably got 10 years left. I mean, I remember that. Yeah, he came back though. And the remember, he did the slim fast commercials because losing weight, you know, so. Yeah, that was a mistake.

Yeah. Well, you know, for the Olympic level, the elite level, I'd say probably two years is more, a new study suggests transgender women maintain an athletic advantage over their cisgendered peers even after a year. Well, no shit. No shit. No shit.

A whole year? Yeah. Oh, wow. That's a, I mean, how much time could it possibly take? Man, it's, yeah. I think it's, I think it's always entertaining, because it is the most. Having to maintain the thought in your head

that it's anything other than this requires a level of, either requires a level of commitment that I can't fathom. Right. Just how, like I can barely, how can you live for 25 years as a man with testosterone and everything that goes along with it, you know, flowing through your body at normal levels and the mind and having such a superior mind.

That too. And maybe, maybe, you know, in higher levels because you're probably a damn good athlete before. Oh, yeah. Compared to the average person. That's... So it's like, you're already, you know, in the upper echelon of, you know, you're not, you're jokey public walking around, you know?

At one year, the trans woman on average still have, trans women on average still have an average advantage over cis women, he said. I'd like to hear like what the, like what happens to, you know, the muscle tone, all that kind of stuff. I'm really interested in that. I'd pay, no, I know I'd pay $5 to learn to see it. I mean, that's what this is. Step right up, step right up. See, the amazing study we've just done on cis, on cis, on biological men who are taking

on the moms and competing in sports with women. I mean, just some gentlemen, I mean, just some, you know, specifics, not necessarily. But that's what this, like, this is a modern, this is a modern carnival barker show that newspapers put on to sell clicks is what I'm saying. No, no, no, no, I know and see. I know. Amazing. put on to sell clicks is what I'm saying. No, no, no, I know. And up and see this amazing active duty service members, blobby blue, but he blew.

For the first two years after starting hormones, the trans women in the review were able to do 10% more pushups and 6% more sit ups than their cisgendered female counterparts. After two years, after two years, they were fairly equivalent. It's okay. Whatever. Knock yourselves out. Oh yeah, the coup. Did I get all the coup points?

I hope so. I believe I did. Oh yeah, removing dissident side ability to speak. If I was looking for a coup, are the stuff I was this is the stuff I would look for You're going to get nuclear launch codes in the military outside of the chain of command like Pelosi did that's something out of the market for a good coup lately You can set it next to all the pressure cookers I got a pressure cooker. You don't like them, but they're badass. They are badass. They I got a pressure cooker, you don't like them, but they're badass. They are badass. They cook chili and impeaching Trump

so he can't run again. Damn quick. That's something I would look forward to cooking. I don't know. I don't know. Let me see what else I got here. So based LA comedian is banned. Yeah.

LA based comedian is banned. You know, big class I got arrested. Diddy? I wonder how many Dixho listeners we lost in the great coup. And what do you get arrested? It's a correction. What do you get arrested?

He got arrested for live streaming himself using Nancy Pelosi's office phone. Uh-huh. Yeah. To make funny calls. Right. Well, that's, well, everybody go and, everybody looked like a bunch of tourists with their fucking phones out and shit.

It was a big, it's a big self. It's like, It was retarded. Oh, baked aloud. Yeah, of course, the dessert. Oh, they, they fucking scrubbed him, didn't they? Really? Arrested. I don't be able to see it. There it is. That's the, the, the, the file footage. File footage. Big, the last girl looking confused. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, where are you? Oh, God. I need to, I can't see you in that one. Those fucking two, man.

Those two. Shagget, wouldn't have been brave, Shagget was arrested as well. They have to go as a pair anywhere they go. They are like, they're like a married couple. It's, it's, it's bizarre. It's bizarre and almost cute. It's, it's, it's bizarre and almost cute. It's almost endearing.

It's so funny. No, no, no, no, no, just hang on, hang on, you know. Very funny, very unhealthy. You think we could get that amendment passed? Radified. The original first? Why not? I mean, why not?

What else do I have to do? Right? I don't know, man. Like, I have to seriously look into the steps on, you know, the grass, obviously, it's like a grass roots level, right? Yeah, our grass roots movement, right? Marketing. Because, oh, wow. What a coincidence. Online marketing. A lot of that. Right. And nothing to lose. Right. What do you say? Well, you're not going to get into any real trouble for sure.

There you are. This is the destruction of the entire power complex, the cathedral that runs our country. You'll be fine. I want to see how much traction you could get. That'd be kind of an amazing thing. If the 19 year old kid did it. Yeah. I drink. I could drink year old kid did it, I drink, well, I could drink him on the table. Well, yes, you could. I'm sure you have more, you

know, more, why not, you know, tools at your disposal to, like you said, marketing. Yeah. Even hot chicks are complaining about the censorship on Twitter. That's, and that's, that's shocking to me. Like, wow, it's generally ratted javsky. And that's shocking to me. Like wow, it's generally ratajowsky that bitch that was shocking that hot chicks are complaining. Ha ha ha the Great Depression. Wow. Have fun. I do love seeing everybody flip on them, seeing all the right wingers. So shocked that the police. I read one quote that was, this isn't supposed to be happening. The police are supposed to be protecting us. They're shooting at us. Well, I guess somebody had the wrong idea then didn't they, you dumb bitch. Ah, ah, ah, ah.

Iceman, women fighter pilots, hey, Dick and Sean, if this makes it on the show, don't read my name. Last episode, you guys, his name is not Iceman, I changed. Last episode you guys talked about women in special forces. And I wanted to share my experiences working with women fighter pilots in the Air Force. I love, I already love this. I already love this because it's a guy who's there.

Yeah. Oh yeah. First hand knowledge. In the past 12 years working in fighter squadrons, I've had the great fortune of working with not one, but two different female fighter pilots, both of which were complete failures. Yeah. The first one managed to get through training. This is Air Force, not Navy,

like the Tomcat pilot who crashed. The first one managed to get through training, but quickly failed out at the squadron because she had a nasty habit of crying. Oh. Whenever she fucked something up during a mission and got called out during the debrief. Oh man. Yeah. Okay, Well, well, the had a little, you had some little oopsies,

but the mental toughness is part of that. You know, I mean, it's, there's possible that controls weren't designed with you in mind. And that's, we're going to say that that's half to blame. Let's make a blame chart for you who blew up our own base and then crashed into it. God, God, hell, that. I don't wanna say it's your fault. If they ever have to parallel park a plane. Dude, I mean hundreds of millions of dollars

destroyed in a matter of moments. Oh, okay. She was on her way on 1157. Well, okay. Okay, cool. Fight her pilots, you're trained to be direct and point out every mistake because doing stupid shit or being careless and a $20 million jet usually gets someone killed.

I think only 20 million? Depends on the plane. The second woman pilot also didn't like to be told she sucked at her job, but instead of crying, her power move was to accuse people of sexual assault. Oh. And actually ended up getting more than a few pilot trainees, either disciplined or kicked out of the Air Force entirely.

Fortunately, they caught on to her bullshit and eventually forced her to leave the pilot program. Last I heard, she ended up flying drones and bombing weddings for Obama. Oh boy. Oh, fuck yourself. Yeah. You know, from what I've looked into for the Navy pilots, there were, there were absolutely

clear indications that they, neither one of them should be there. Oh, yeah. Yeah, absolutely where it was like, yeah, they allowed them to do this again. And yeah, it's, you know, you got to, there's certain things where you just have to be up to snuff. You got to be able to do what everybody else does when everybody else can do it. Yeah. I don't know why we need them. Rage, parents with no retirement savings, business is from Pete. What makes me a rage is my fucking dad has been running a business for 30 years,

and now he's almost 60, and he has set aside Jack's shit for retirement. Yeah, great. I'm almost 30, and I'm now making pretty good money in investments, and I'm constantly trying to help my dad invest, set up an IRA, something, but he has that boomer dumbass. I'm going to live forever in all this business. Well, something will happen. It'll work out. Yeah, there is a lot of that.

There is a lot of that because they were born under a Ponzi scheme that they know is going to last. Yeah. They know is gonna outlast them. People forget that it was, it is the original me generation. Yeah. It's been called that since basically they came of age. No, I'll just bust my ass working until I drop dead instead of taking a couple hours to set up a retirement account because something, something, what if banks collapse or the investment

custodian steals all the money and flees the country? Is that what they think? The real rage is that he's always like, ha ha, I'll just munch off you when you're rich so I can retire. Motherfucker, having kids is not your insurance policy or your retirement account, especially since you never taught me jack shit about money or business. No college fund, nothing. Anything I did learn from him about business I had to unlearn.

Yeah. Because yeah, it turns out having a firm handshake is less important than financial savvy and awareness of technological trends in business. I think you could do both. I think you could master that firm handshake in, I don't know, 10, 20 minutes, given the worst of handshakes. I feel like you could get up to stuff. Maybe you know, there might need some physical therapy.

You might need a stress ball. You're going to get those muscles right. You know, over the top. Yeah, I do. I do judge weak ass handshakes, though. You know, I just fucking hate shaking hands, man. I don't care about. It doesn't have to be level guys. Just crank you over. Yeah, fuck you. No, it doesn't have, it just has to like, like, you, just, just so you give a shit. It doesn't have to be like a fucking, like, you know, a dick fucking measuring contest. I'm done with it. It's, um, I started telling people, not, not doing that. Yeah.

Not everybody, because some people, they get you. Right. And it's an instinct. Like, ah, that's probably how chicks put out a lot. All of a sudden, they would have said, no, I'm like, oh, he's just like, dammit, I'm naked. I'm like, fuck, I'm gonna get a dick in my hand. Damn, I can't stop.

Yeah, might as well. The real rage is that he's always told me, you know, anything worth doing is worth doing right and finish what you start. And so he started. Here I am again. Thanks, dad. The real rage is that he's always like, haha, I'll just munch off you and you're rich so I can retire.

That's probably not a joke. Stop wasting money on stupid Amazon bullshit for your grandchildren, sisters, not mine, and save your retirement, you boomerfuck. Might be a little late now to start. How much difference are you gonna make in five years? Yeah, not much, not much. Social security and a greeter at Walmart or driving Uber.

Oh, did you see that? I mean, that's the future, right? Yeah. Yeah. Did you see that some big stores in California fired all of their employees to replace them with Uber drivers who were contractors or something like that.

Yeah, because of that, because we passed that bill. We passed that bill that empowered like Uber drivers so they couldn't unionize or something like that. So Ralph said, oh, well, we're just firing all our employees when we're placing them with Uber drivers. That's fine. We don't care.

Dana's show about a guy with a giant cock from Jason Haydick. Feminists are pissed that a children's show about a guy with a comically large cock. It's effectively a tail. What? You can grab stuff with. Here's the link. Oh, let's check it out.

Oh, it's a pre-hensil tail. Pre-hensil cock. But it's supposed to be a tail. Well, I mean, it's supposed to be a cock. I think it's supposed to be a tail. Well, I mean, it's supposed to be a cock. I think it's supposed to be a tail if it's a children's show. I'm going, I'm going out of the can. I'm super weener. This is, this is literally bam, bam.

Strong weener. Strong weener, which is Danish. It's so much better than super weener. Yeah, strong weener is so fucking funny. Denmark launches children's show about a man with a giant penis. Critics condemn the idea of animated series about a man who cannot control his penis, but others have backed it. This is hilarious.

What's wrong with this? It's just, look, that's amazing. That's amazing. Candy cane man. And he's wearing a little candy cane bathing suit. And his dick is all covered in that same candy cane. He looks like beetle juice, like a penis beetle. And so it looks like a fucking umbilical cord or like, she's about to drop a, I can't,

it's like, it doesn't even look like real artwork. Uh, guy, John Hatt, Dillermand has an extraordinarily long penis. So extraordinary in fact, that it can perform rescue operations. Edge Mierls. This is Denmark's version of the onion or. No, this is the the guardian.com. Oh, I see. Yeah.

The guardian. Overcoming hardships and challenges with his record breaking genitals. Uh-huh. Unsurprisingly, the series is a provoked debate about what good children's television should be and should not contain. Oh, wow. Should children be aware of a man with a pre-hensial penis? Well, it's, you know, it's,

huh. Yeah, that's a, I'm looking for the, I'm looking for the, that's better than Jack Tyron, like no genitals on them at all. That's pretty bad. That's pretty morbid. Yeah, right. You're looking for the satire on what,

this guy with this giant top. I mean, I was just looking for the, I'm looking for the, the other the show drop. Yeah. No, it's just a funny show. I'll be watch this when I was a kid. Maybe children show. It's a guy with a giant dong. I can't believe it. Like the fucking marsupal I can't remember that guy with any money with dick. What the who? The marsupalami that Disney cartoon, the marsupalami. No, no, I don't. It was like a a little monkey a cheetah monkey that had a gigantic dick that would do stuff with it could swing around Also probably a tail super I remember that. Oh no bring it up marsupal. I mean yes

So he Marsupal I mean, so what I mean he's part marsupial. What is it like a you know look? He had a giant cock and he was swing around the jungle. Let me say penis. Here's impregnant. Why did Children can't handle a cartoon about a guy getting into high jinks. Okay. No, I do a Google search on marsupalamy and I find a Pregnant marsupalamy Deviant art page fucking Fucking, fucking brilliant. Yep, yep. Somebody's like, people are jacking off to that.

Here he is, it is gigantic. The marsupalami. Well, I'm pretty sure the dick isn't in the back though. Yeah, it comes out of his butt. That's a funny thing that, there was a time where, well, I've actually seen things that they needed, you know, the animators to change because, you know, a lot of the animation is done overseas. There was a, we were doing some Scooby-Doo ADR and, you know, some of it came back.

Like, it's like, no, the tail doesn't grow out of the butt hole. The butt hole is below the tail on a dog. And I was like, oh my God, I'll never run see this. Scooby do, growing like a three foot stink tail. Here's the link. Oh, man. Well, I hope children don't learn that your penis will get you into trouble.

They should just, at the end of every episode, just get it chopped off. Just chop it off. And then he's like, it's like killing Kenny every episode and then he's, oh, here he's back the next one. He's back you bitch. Penis intact up to shenanigans from a friendly Mormon. Hey, dick, I've listened about every episode for the past year or so. And today I was listening to the Christian Baptist who called in with his list of deal breakers for women.

Oh, he's going to talk about the black people. Of course. Yeah. about the black people. Of course. Yeah. Setting the record straight. Yeah. It was refreshing to know that another Christian is a fan of the show.

Oh, because they're Christians too. What? Mormons? Well, they believed. Well, here's how I've always defined it. If you believe that Christ, that Jesus of Nazareth was the Son of God who died for your salvation, your Christian, if not your other.

So yes, more mornments are Christians. They just wrote some other stuff. If I believe that Trump is Christ the Redeemer and was sacrificed by an interdimensional cabal of pedophile vampires, am I a Christian too? No. Okay. It was refreshing to know that. Am I a Christian too? No. Okay. It was refreshing to know that another Christian is a fan of the show.

It's good to know that there are people out there that believe in one thing, but can also listen and enjoy a great podcast, even if it doesn't align with what they believe all the time. I actually think my beliefs probably do align with Christians, so for my and personally. Well, some. Yeah. I'm

not personally. I do. On Nord's list of dealbreakers, he mentioned um Norman, which is no surprise, especially if he is a Baptist. You generally don't like Mormons very much. Oh, no absolutely true. I think religion is good. Ari, come on in. We're just talking about Christ. Didn't I tell you last week?

What's up? There's going to be exciting. No matter what, it's going to be exciting on January 6th. Didn't I say that last week? Oh, yeah. Yeah, it was. It was funny. You can't deny that.

I've lied. You can't deny a guy in a Buffalo helmet sitting on the Senate floor. That's funny. No, I tell the post that it's your I was dying. I on the sitting on the Senate floor. That's funny. No, I tell the post that it's your I was dying love. It was so funny with the coke. Oh yeah, did you see that? It was so funny. What's up?

You escaping from the Senate with a coke? Really? Yeah, hold on. Oh God. These guys, man. The dick show. Oh, you still have an Instagram. Yeah, do you they let me do whatever I want?

Look, there's you. There's Sean escaping with the Coke. That's fucking awesome. That's awesome. That's Nancy's Coke, Sean. That's done pretty well. I think Kitten Fiddler's does that or Travis touchdown. I don't know what his name is.

So we're talking about what Kenny, Kenny didler did that. Fiddlers does that, or Travis touchdown. I don't know what his name is. So we're talking about Christ. What, Kitten Fiddlers? Okay, cool. Kitten Fiddlers? Kitten Fiddlers? Yeah. He's Fiddling Kittens. Fiddling Kittens, not Dittling Kitties.

Oh, fuck, that's a dull different topic. Yeah. Well, it's a hot topic these days. I think it's weird that guys are so into a 19 year old texting with a 17 year old. To everyone so into the fight of ours. Yeah, it's weird that guys are so into a 19 year old texting with a 17 year old. To everyone so into pedophiles. Yeah, it's a little odd. Guys with no kids are just really into pedophiles.

Okay. Some people with kids too, which is kind of also sus. It is sus. Well, they're super worried. That's sus. Is it just like everybody's a pedophile? Yeah. I don't know, I don't understand it, but.

They have trading cards. Upper deck, upper deck came out with a whole hot foil, pedophile. It did not really. Yeah, they did. Is that legal? They should. Yeah. Okay. If he's a Baptist, if of Nords list of deal breakers, he mentioned Mormons, which is not surprising, especially if he's a Baptist, they generally don't like Mormons very much. But they hand out anti-Mormon literature and stuff. Do they really? It was just in Mormon country. Utah.

Oh yeah, that's Mormon country. Yeah, my mom was like, don't come back. Like pregnant with seven kids. I was like, I'm not going to give it anymore. I'm going to look at what they had. I feel like they have that too much feel like they have that. She worked hard. But he said it was good. As we believe that black people are cursed.

And that's why they are darker or something, which is a common misconception from others outside of the church. Is it common? I'm coming to him. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know how common. That's horrible. Wasn't that BLM's position that black people are cursed?

They wanted them to lift the curse. Tell me, tell me this, did we not see women protesting Kavanaugh by storming into the capital and sitting in their desks and getting on the elevator and shouting at senators? Did we not see that on TV? Did you not, did we not see that? I didn't watch the TV. I don't know. I swear to God, I've been asking people is all week.

Did I not see that? I don't know. I fucking sure I saw them with all the pussy hats running in and storming and screaming at them. We, you will not, you will not ignore us. We're here. Just a bunch of paint in the ass. A bunch of random women.

Yeah. How do we do it? Really? Yes. I swear to God. I paint in the ass. A bunch of random women. Yeah. Don't even worry about it. Really? Yes, I swear to God. They did not get on the other. They got into her and then looking like Marcy Darcy. Bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap.

No, at the senators. Bap, bap, bap, bap, bap, bap. Have one thing to say to you, Marcy. I swear I saw this. Really? And so I was watching you get to get on TV and I see the Maya, bro, bro. Oh, wow. Well, I don't know what gave them the idea that.

So I gave it to do that. All members of the LDS church I have met do not believe that black people are cursed by the color of their skin, but that simply they are descendants of ham. Oh. No, that's part of, supposed to be the Muslims. Not Muslims? Yeah, Muslims won't eat ham. No, that's a of supposed to be the Muslims. Not in the other. Yeah, Muslims won't eat ham.

Right. That's a Jews, I think. Muslims don't eat pork either. I could have that wrong, but I'm pretty sure Muslims descended from ham or something. No, Muslims are Muslims benefit from pork stuffed bills. How about, or is dammit, I'm fucked up. Hi, religion. That was almost a New Yorker level cartoon.

Thank you. Thank you. Nobody understands. Yeah, very, very, very, heady stuff today is possible that some early LDS members believed in such things back in the early 1800s before the time blacks were freed from so he doesn't even capitalize blacks. So is resupply racist. So does resuppell. I don't know, but take it from me who served a I know like two year long mission for the communities in Liberia, West Africa with no running water and limited electricity. You know what you need? You know what you need? You need this book. What? You need this book. People in Liberia with no running water. Oh, yeah, if you soak it

It if you can find some water and soak it long enough you can eat it Hmm Where I met some of my dearest friends and met some of the most amazing people the church is doctrine today is not Racists is not racist in any way also what Nord said about fake nails is true. They are pretty gross. Yeah Okay, I do know the Mormons have updated with the times as far as like, oh, the, the profit got a, you know, revelation. And now black people can hold the priesthood, you know, stuck. They couldn't, no, no, they couldn't for a long time, I think.

My wife's had hers removed and found mold growing between the fake nail and the real one. Oh, she's not way too long. I feel like that's not bite mine off before they even can do that. You bite your fake nail, so I'm sorry. Yeah, before they can like grow out, I was playing with the fake nail. Yeah, I have a one on. You have a car in that. I was trying to say go on the fake nail.

Yeah, you're doing way too much coke. You're using a thumbnail fake nail. No, no. So I was trying to take a boomerang in my hands. We're disgusting. So when we just stick one on real quicks, I didn't look bad. If you ever want to. If you're sorry, you were trying to do a boomerang. A boomerang on Instagram I was doing a thing and I didn't want and then I was like I actually don't even like

this nail anyway, so I'm gonna put it in there. So I have one on the end. I like your snow-bunny outfit, the hat and the little afro puff things. The white afro put. What were you gonna say Sean? I was gonna say Coke nails. If you ever watch like the song remains the same, the live Zeppelin concert from the 70s, you know, Paige is a guitar player, so he's not gonna have long nails. But if you look at his fretting hand, he's got this enormous nail on his thumb.

Like it's everything else is trim. He's got this huge fucking nail on his thumb. You're like Jesus. What? What about that? Vance. I have one more. Oh, we're working at COVID testing center guy.

Okay. Oh yeah. Vance 99 proof rage. Capitol Hill finger waglers. How can the same psickophantic retards, who solemnly withheld judgment from the rioting masses last summer, possibly look down on the people who storm Capitol Hill?

See, this is what I mean about the hypocrisy people, right? Yeah, but you're, they're not allowed to be in there. But they were for the Kavanaugh things. I haven't seen that. I mean, they just let them, I feel like there's more to the story. I mean, I don't know if I may... That's, that's, that's equal. Like, if that, if it happened like that, then like, yes, you have to say that I don't get how the response isn't just like, yeah, people got out of hand. I mean, it's America.

Everybody's really keyed up. A lot of money is staked. You know what the funny thing is, protesting. Some people got a little wild. And then yeah, sure, capitol's open. I want to go see what's in there. Well, the funny thing is, I assume that they could just leave because we're coming in.

The Capitol Police knew for, and get back to this story, but what? The Capitol police for weeks knew that there was going to be, you know, a gathering and a rally and all that kind of stuff. They have an operating budget that's exactly the same as the city of Boston, right? It's a lot. Big city. It's like $430 million. Yeah. Something like that. It's in the $400 million range. Put more guys. They have their entire territory is two square miles. So they couldn't they couldn't protect that that day. Right. When you know, like, you know, decades are going to be there too. You know, bad guys are going to be there. What the fuck? You know, bad guys and crazy people are going to be there. Like I have more protection at a live dick

show. Then they had that day. I just don't fucking get it. And it's a staggering fail. It's harder to get into a club in Miami than the fucking capital. Yeah, just sad like with the fuck. Anyway, if those guys who would try to eat inside anywhere, boom, done, kicked out immediately. That's a rhetorical question. The answer is, of course, that the unfuckable blowhards burning down Minneapolis largely had the same politics as them, or were

at least useful to their political agenda. Now the table's turned, but instead of mom and pop stores being looted in a veritable selection of unfortunate white and black people being beaten into a bloody pulp, it's overwhate white people smashing into the Capitol with mega hats and Trump flags escapes. I'm not surprised that Blue Checkmarks are taking this opportunity to proselytize the importance of peaceful transfer power from one military adventure and power and party to another, but I'm certainly disappointed, especially since some of most of the preachers coming from people who shouldn't give a shit about anything happening in DC, much less the 133

million budget housing, the same fat cons who gave them some of $40,000. I mean, I feel like that's he's very very well said. I agree, but well written. Yeah. Yeah. You want me to hear more? No, that's got me. I get that.

No, it was good. It was good. Let me have some advice. Then I want to get to some news with you. Have you been? Good. I was locked down and been your COVID free. Yeah, no.

You got the anti-body. I can see them in you. Mm-hmm. I'm looking. I have a special vision. They're showing. It lets me see the antibodies that are coursing through you. And now there's some new fucking one.

I'm like, okay, whatever I'm done. This is stupid. Oh, now you're done. I've been done. No, I literally had it. I was like, COVID's a joke. Like this isn't fucking real. It's like the flu.

It hits anybody. If you're unhealthy, it hits you. And it was great. It's like the flu. It hits anybody. If you're unhealthy, it hits you. And it was great. I wish that was true. I just feel like 80s girl had it. It was the greatest week of my life. Yes, that's true. And I thought it was great.

Now she's never gonna get it again. Now it's, it's, No, you can still get it again. Oh, thank God. And now there's a new one too. Yeah, it's just that it's a wild card. Like, I got again, people like us, we're in good shape, we're healthy.

It'll be, we'll be fine. I just feel like they, but sometimes you get the, it's been, you know, college people and athletes, it's like if it just, it's like it unlocks up, they get, you know, cardio myopathy or things like that. But yeah, sometimes a frozen spike of piss falls out of a plane and hits you in the head. What do you do? Blue chunks. What are you gonna fucking that. Yeah. But yeah, sometimes a frozen spike of piss falls out of a plane and hits you in the head. What do you do?

Blue chunks. What are you going to fucking do? Yeah. Yeah, right. Yeah. It's just the wild card nature of it. No, I just feel like the whole lockdown situation, like yeah, like you should monitor things, but like locking everything down, like nature is going to take its course eventually.

So when you let people out, they're going to get it and then it's going to, like it is not just going to disappear forever. Pardon it. Lockdown then. So no, they should just let it out. And then people that will get it will get it, people that won't eventually go with done. It'll be, I mean, do you want me to read this advice? Yeah. Okay. This is from Jean Philippe. Look, lechlech. Hey, need a dictative. I'm living the movie True Romance somewhat. Oh, really? Do you remember that movie, Ari?

I was just thinking that one scene. Coke flying all over the place? No, the, you know, the Dennis Hopper. Oh, I don't remember that scene. The Antichrist, that's how he says the Antichrist, like the Antichrist. Did you see they removed Trump from Home Alone 2? No.

They removed him. Let me see if that's true. I got to look that up. First, the Duke's a hazard. Home Alone too, removed. I swear to God, I think the Duke's a hazard thing is still such a chill. Fans call for Trump to be removed. Okay, not yet.

Jesus. Well, people call for settle fucking down. Oh, that's not happening. Yeah, I know. No, no, no, no, no. Hey, Dick and John, I'm JP from Canada. I'm 22 and I need some advice. I'm basically going through a true romance type situation.

Yeah. But without the million dollars of crosswords, my sister is basically a pimp slash working girl. Damn. A pimp slash working girl damn a pimp slash wow Madam, so she's got a Adam right so she's running horse and Is able herself. How do you know when you got a train? How do you train right? How do you train to be a madam? Yeah, how do you train to accounting? Yeah, you have to be an accounting degree You have to you have to train them to work for you. Get your hands dirty.

You've got to be in the work for a while. You've got to walk a mile in there, vagina, I see. From time to time, I help her with different ventures, whether it's getting supplies, drugs, yeah, transporting or lodging. I never fuck the girls. That's a weird flex. I never fuck the girls.

I don't pay for sex. Okay. Wouldn't be for you don't pay for sex. Okay. Wouldn't be for you since you were well. Okay, man. I think we need to have a little sit down and talk about what he means. Anyway, to get to the meat of it, she had a new girl, 18 years old, 5.1, 105 pounds. Whoa. Specific.

Yeah, that's a good, good specific. Yeah. You think? Yeah, do you think he picked her up to feel that or he just looked? He probably picked her up. Yeah. I can do that. If I can pick, I can tell exactly how much women way by picking them up only, and then

just, you know, they're under 120 pounds though. And this does this work. Very nice seat cups. And her nipples are pierced. She's really hot. So I meet this girl once and twice and we talk a little. She's only been a hooker for a week, when on the 24th, she'll be tore up another week. Do you any girls who get into hooking?

Yeah. How long is it? What's the emotional roller coaster? Oh, I could do this. Oh God, I want to kill myself. Right. Yeah. They start off dancing and then they solely, and then it's like, don't do anything.

They solely do little things. Club dancing? No, like bachelor parties. And then solely, they start doing like a little more and then eventually. And then they start. And then go crazy. And then go crazy. And then go crazy.

And then go crazy. And then go crazy. And then go crazy. And then go crazy. And then go crazy. And then go crazy. And then go crazy. And then go crazy. drug on the 24th my sister leaves me alone with booze crosswords. That's what we call cocaine. And this chick. So I end up banging her, banging with her for four days straight, even going on a road trip for another girl's court appearance.

I'm romantic. That's cute, like in its own. Emotional support. An emotional support boy. support. I'm working so my friends on trial for prostitution and I go there to just be in court. It's sweet. She didn't go off on any calls during those days giving a feeling of normalcy to the whole trip. We had a lot of fun together. That's nice of her.

My problem is because the lack of interaction with girls since COVID and general isolation, I went really soft and kind of developed feelings for the girl. I'm pretty sure she doesn't have any for me. That's true because women don't have, as I've said many times, women do not have any feelings.

No white from the sun. No white from the sun. I mean, I just think we only have feelings for the men that don have any feelings. No white from the sun. I mean, we only have feelings for the men that don't have feelings. It's not the shit. That's what a man just really is. That's true in so many cases. I also don't want to be in a relationship,

but I can't stop myself from feeling possessive and wanting to fuck her brains out every time I see her. Anyways, I don't know if I should keep having sex with her and end up looking like a chump. How would that, man? You just got it. Maybe he can't separate the sex from the emotion. Well, yes, he can't.

Yeah, guys can't do that. No, never. Shocker. Well, or stop now while I still have some dignity left in me. Come on. I think you're every, I need to rewrite this. Yeah. Where's my red pen? He's saying he can't because of COVID he's a little in his head.

That's a lie. Guys have been fucking and falling in love with Horace since the beginning of time. I don't know. I don't buy it. Right, I don't want to fall in love with her. I don't buy it. He just already is. Yeah, I don't, yeah.

I think that, that would have happened whether COVID was here or not. Somehow we started fucking and I weirdly fell in love. I don't know how to explain it. It's COVID or here or not. Somehow we started fucking and I weirdly fell in love. I don't know how to explain it. It's COVID or perhaps the moon. Right. Anyway, I don't know if I should keep having sex with her. Yes. End up looking like a chump to whom.

Right, but yes, fucking too much of horrors. Or stop now. Well, I still have some dignity left horrors. Or stop now. Well, I still have some dignity left in me. You don't. There's no dignity. There's no dignity period. Touched up sales. When I was, what did you say?

That ship sailed. Yeah, that's gone. You never had any. That's something that's being sold to you. When I was having my balls inflated by a furry, I thought, oh no, I might lose my dignity. Yeah, thought, oh God, I really hope this doesn't, I really hope I don't wake up tomorrow with no dignity.

Right. I haven't seen or fucked her since she left my place to go to calls three days ago. Oh yeah, that's odd. Yeah. That's depressing. That's why you can't fall in love. That's why you can't fall in love. That's why you can't fall in love.

Was it working girl? Was it working girl? Yeah, or like, you just tried to turn a horn to a housewife. Right. That's as old, right? How many times has that happened? That's something that housewives say to make you think that there's a difference.

That's marketing from big housewives. I've never heard it from women. And I mean big. They trick guys in houses. That's what I have to housewise. Why? They can have jobs. It's there the size of a house.

She has a job. She's got an Etsy store. So having you seen it, I just don't know how to proceed. She has a job. It's keeping the rain off of my head. Any advice would help. And seriously go, OK, where do we have red flags here? Went soft and developed feelings.

Admit that's not true. That's not the reason. Man, you gotta put some balls into your love, dude. Don't fall in love and be a pussy about it. Anyways, to get the meat of it new girl, very nice. Very nice. Very nice, another girl. Feeling of normalcy to the whole thing. Yeah. Okay. Go for it. What? Yeah. I mean, she can always go back to being a hooker.

It's the good. Yeah. I dropped that a college. What do you back to being a hooker? When I always come back to school, it's never going to go. Yeah. The guys. I can always go back to drinking. Yeah. Yeah. So just quit for a little bit and see how you like it right right if it's better Steve. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, you know, there will always be guys there just sit her down and say look There's always gonna be guys who will pay to fuck you. Yeah, why not why don't we try so you're saying having a relationship right? Open maybe he's open relationship. He's cool with it. He's not never, never the case. Yeah, no, no, no. But y'all did the case if it was reversed. Yes, that's correct.

Absolutely. Yeah, double standard, double standard, no problem with that. No problem with pointing out the hypocrisy. Oh, so you're saying it's okay for men to fuck multiple and but it's not okay, yeah, correct, correct. Now you understand BLM riots, everybody. That's exactly what it is.

Okay, would you read some news for us, please? Do we fix this guys prop? What do you think you should do? I think he should talk to her and see what she wants to do if she likes him. She doesn't like him, then no use going further. She does like him, then can he afford to take care of them both? Can she get another job that's like helping out a little bit? Who, look, do you honestly want to work?

I mean, that's the, that's the real sale. It's not choose me over at the store. That's a great way to put it actually. Yeah, just quit your job. Do you want to, yeah, quit your job. I mean, God, I mean, some of these guys, you know, I mean, they can't be, you know, I mean, he's not paying to fuck her, obviously, right? Well, maybe, maybe she's like, she either has family relying on her or she's like addicted

to the money. And then, that's a lot of him. Get a sugar daddy. Get your fattest friend to set up a hooker appointment after you propose to her, like the relationship to drop out hooking, find the most disgusting guy you know, and have him set up her next appointment so that she walks into that and goes like, oh, God, I've made a horrible mistake. I'm going to go back. I'm going go back. I'm gonna run back to.

Yeah. Smart. Smart. Then knock her up. Go. She can't hook for it. Right, right, exactly. Okay, all right.

I want that. What have you got? And then y'all want her when she's chubby after having the kid and then like, all right, you can go back or I'll get the nice sucker. It's just that it works. I've seen many celebrities look amazing after their pregnancy. That's what I'm saying. or I'll get the next sucker. It's just the other works. I've seen many celebrities look amazing after their pregnancy.

That's what I'm saying. I was just saying that. I'm not the one who's the first. It's a little different. You can find all the stuff that celebrity trainers do online. I love when they post that stuff. Oh, here's Anne Hathaway after having six, two months after having a kid.

She looks amazing. Like, aha, aha, yeah. Yeah, we're not ugly. We're just poor. Okay. What do we got? The US economy lost 140,000 jobs in December. All of them were held by women. A year ago, I wear a thing happened to American women.

For three months, they held more jobs than men in the US economy. Something that has only happened in 2009 and 2010. The pandemic quickly changed that story. And according to new data employees, employers cut 140,000 jobs from women while men gained 16,000 jobs. Oh, stuff wasn't getting that bad. They were like, well, go be wives.

All those non-essential got got the boot. Huh? Now they're off. Yeah. Haven't now they're off the books and their hookers. So there's no, no, everyone has only fans. Dude, no shit. I was going to say you should probably even if you're not doing a nude stuff, erotic stuff.

Only fans might be better because page. You know, is increasingly aggressive with locking stuff down. Yeah. What do you mean? Lockies down. Like they have the same business model as only fans, but only a fashion. increasingly aggressive with locking stuff down. Yeah, what do you mean locking stuff down? Like they have the same business model as only fans, but only OAS.

Yeah, found a way to do a soft core pornography. Do they? Yeah, how do they do that? Yeah. High risk credit card processor probably. Yeah. How long do you think that would be? Probably an international bank, like a Russian bank

or something like that, maybe. Yeah. That's the only way, because you'll never get that from the domestics, right? I mean, the... It's difficult. Yeah. No, yeah, a lot of people hit me. I've really fans was like, ah, no, down. And then you trick guys in there. Yeah, like because they think something's happening. No, no, they think that was my picture in. Of course. They already think that so as I put out my TikTok, so I'll get a couple things that'll hit like six million views and they'll think it's like

They're like, what the fuck and they'll think it. I don't get six million people But I'm saying like you're out of that. you'll get a couple people that will just go on there and sign up thinking. It's 30 people clicking a lot. And then they go on there and they're like, wait, this isn't, and then hopefully I'm just entertaining enough of a clusterfuck to that. You are, what's your Patreon?

Let me find it. I think it's just Arion, Jidjidjily, under, whatever. Amazing. Stereo's boom. What is it? You couldn't go 10 minutes without hearing his Patreon. Mm. Well, it's what we do, sir.

I want to loads. We'll see it. OK. OK, of course, many of my lost their jobs in December 2. But when taken together as a group, they came out ahead. Whereas women fell behind. Economists often worn against reading too much into a single month, but December's job loss is capped off, and already awful year for working women.

I heard that there's like 500,000 jobs lost in restaurants. Yeah. Sorry, I haven't heard that. I haven't heard the numbers, but that wouldn't surprise me. Everything else is up, because it's kind because it's kind of opening back up. They found a way to do it except restaurants for the marketing. Well, that was one of the earliest, that was one of the earliest kind of narratives I heard was.

Restaurants are fucked. Yeah. What's that joke that, you know, we've said over and over, that why is it that all chefs like used to be criminals or have been be criminals or have served in prison time? Have you ever heard that? You ever met a lot of chefs? And they're all like, yeah, you know what I got at a prison when I got at a big house?

I have heard that. So they're all out of a job now? That'll be great. Wonderful. What's the job you can get with absolutely no training? You got to support a family, something like that. Oh, God, what is this? Pharmaceutical sales, is that realtor?

Is that the job? Find, no, it's waitress. Bus boy. I thought you were just gonna say criminal. Org that. Okay. I think I haven't pulled it up. I think how do you find it? Do you know how to find it on you?

Some job. Oh my God. I can't believe I'm about to touch your phone. Let me see. No, I lost my trins because it went and it was going up. And then I take talk made us take them down. You can't put only fans or patron or anything on there because I think it's yeah, I think it's like porn and like younger kids were able to get on it. Like, young kids, so they did it where we can't promote it on there. So you can't have it as your link. So that's where I didn't promote it at all. I just literally had my link up there and people would just click it. So I felt bad like being like, check it out.

As you go to the web and paste what's in your clipboard, it'll show you what it is. I think or just text it to me. How many dick picks did you get on that inside of you? And that in about 10 seconds. No, I don't fucking. Oh, which is Arion, Julie. Okay, it's like Patreon slash Arion, Julie. Arion.

Okay, Patreon.com slash Arion, Julie, there you go. Sweet. Sean, we might have guessed that one. Okay, what's next? Well, Medieval Chinese coin found in England suggests a vast Medieval trade route. For the second time in three years an 11th century Chinese coin has been found in England.

The more recent coin was unearthed about 20 miles from the only confirmed Medieval Chinese pottery. Chinese coin, Riley, what kind of news is this? Chinese coins? China. What is, all right. A fragment of blue and white porcelain from a small cup or bowl. Though, I think Riley's doing too much acid. This is not the sort of new, who cares about medieval Chinese coins, where they're found?

Well, they're found. I'm interested in this. Not even me today. They found medieval coins, Sean. Yeah. How about that? Okay. Next one. That's what's going on. That's number two on the list. A medieval coin, Sean. Yeah. How about that? Okay.

Next one. That's number two on the list. A medieval coin was found. Well, let's see. I mean, he's allowed to, you know, have done every once in a while. I think so. There's too much. Capital writer, scene in Horned Hat, carrying spear arrested, US Attorney. A man photographed in the US Capitol carrying a six-foot spear and wearing a horned helmet

as a pro-Trump mob breached the building Wednesday has been arrested and charged. The US Attorney's Office for the District of Columbia said, according to NBC News, Jacob Chansey, 33, also known as Jake Angeli. A longtime QAnon supporter from Arizona, of course, was one of the riders in the Capitol. Before his arrest, Chansey called police and confessed he was photographed standing at Vice President. Wait, he confessed he was photographed standing at Vice President.

My friends share. In the Senate days, bear-chested, face-painted, and carrying the spear according to court talking. That wasn't me. Somebody actually DMed me. What's amazing outfit. From the thing, and he was like,

and all his stuff was like, I like this stuff before then. I wasn't pulling it inside the Senate. I'm on the Senate inside the Capitol, and he's like sweating, and he's like, and he's like, it's like all these people, and he's like, yeah, he looks like he's bleeding, he's like wearing a joke,

and I was like, bro, I'm not really like supporting this. And he's like, he goes, if your man, it doesn't look like this on a Wednesday or whatever, like, is he really your man? I'm like, you're not, block you. Fuck his robbing, I think it's still the DMs. I should have been deleted, but I was just like, man, he doesn't look like this on a Wednesday or whatever, like, is he really your man? I'm like, you're not, block you. What the fuck is wrong with you? I think I saw the DMs. I should have had to leave him,

but I was just like, what the fuck? He was storming the Capitol to slide into your DMs. Like, this is your man. He was like sweaty and bloody and I was like, all these people behind him. And he's like, yeah, that was like, oh my God, bro, I can know. That's where like a guy. That definitely didn't get me.

Yeah. I was like, he's like, I'm gonna just send you my door. He's talking about defending the, I'm actually worried that the FBI might knock on my door because I was texting that Buffalo guy. So I said, yeah, those pictures made me, those pictures that they took of you made me the happiest I've felt in like 10 months.

I can't. I wonder if they, thank God, like it's just so funny. You know what? I mean, they may wanna to ask you some questions. Huh, I want to ask them some questions actually. You're like, so. We want to come on the show. I hear you're here.

Yeah, ask me all you want. Come on the show. Yeah, sure. My whole house is bugged. Okay. Next one is. What about coins, stamps? Do we have a stamps?

Mm. New this item. Oh, it's a new. Okay, what's next? The species that clared extinct in 2020. This past year's scientists and conversation organizations declared that a long list of species may have gone extinct, may have gone, we're not sure. Including 22 species of frogs, 32 orchids from Bangladesh, and 17 freshwater fish from the Philippines. Most of these species haven't seen and haven't been seen in decades despite regular expeditions to see if they still exist. Though there is reason for hope, a study published in 2019 found that conversation efforts have reduced

bird extinction rates by 40% and another recent paper showed that conversation actions have prevented dozens of mammal extinctions as well. We can turn things around. We don't just have to sit there and cry, says conversation. Is this what's conservation experts? Is this what's going on outside of the government? I'm talking frog. I don't know how it's right up your alley. I'm sure that he said that if he did this for you.

Well, there's a length of time before they'll like to clear, you know, a species extinct. Yeah. Like calling a volcano extinct or something, you know, a species extinct. You know, like calling a volcano extinct or something, you know, but, or a relationship. Yeah. Yeah. How long?

I don't understand the point of conservation when we can just take their genes. What's the point? What's a big, big, big pain in the ass, isn't it? Well, what the going all the way out there and just watching them be like, well, there's less now. Like, what are you out there?

I'd be able to grab a couple, throw them back out because I think you're going to check on them. Put them in amber, there we go. So have a night, is that a fucking count? Does it, like, who's getting paid to do that? More wasting money. To do what? Go out there and count frogs.

Count frogs and then say, well, why? Maybe they're extinct. Well, they cut all the regular people and just hired autistic people. So all those women, they went out and counted them in record time and that was, it's on reward. They were thrilled to do it. It was great.

Thomas, they had Thomas the Tank Engine come out and say, all right, I would really love if you counted all the frogs in the world. Right. And then they fired all the scientists. Yeah. Yeah. Right. And then they fired all the scientists. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, that's a good idea. Yeah. Okay. I think the last one is in pigeon. Oh, these are good. Oh, you always always say we do this. We make everybody do this. Okay, cool.

Okay. Well, I want to see all the other ones do it worse because I would make it worse. You do it the best. You do it the best, I don't know. No, don't wait. I know you guys had some mixed girls on here, something that I would make it worse. You do it the best. You do it the best, I'm not gonna say that. No, don't wait. I know you guys had some mixed girls on here something that can do it better. What is that?

What do you mean? Is that like the M word? No, sure you can't say. No, mix, like. What did you think she said? What did you say? Black and white. Mixed, yeah, I'm not comfortable with that.

Right, no, we can, so she's saying genetically they can read that better. I don't see the problem with that. I just met. Yeah. How is that controversial? How is that controversial? As mixed.

Right. Are my allowed to say that? Well, see, yeah, I mean, okay, it's like that we're all kind of mixed, but when I say mixed, I mean, like, what, you know, look at that guy and tell me he's mixed. Well, I mixed with them, sure, other things. A lot of, a lot of, a lot of different white people from various areas out here.

I mean, we're all mixed with different things, but I think that what I mean by mixed is black and something. That's what most people mean nowadays. Okay. Okay. Have we had a mix girl in here? Have we? Maybe I don't want to know.

Chat would know. I don't think so. Cause you know, talk about it. I'm light, I don't want to know. Chat would know. I don't think so. Cause you know, talk about it. I'm lightest fuck. Okay, this is coming from someone who lives in the UK. I don't think, I don't care what color you are. You have no, you have no, no standing to call me white as fuck sounding like you do, Raj.

Okay, I'm sorry. You really know a lot of racism in the UK. You're white as fuck. There's not a lot of racism in the UK. I don't think so. Cause a lot of my friends that are here are black and they're like, we've never experienced racism until we came to the US. Oh, I don't know. I mean, the UK has racism, but it's, no, they have it.

They're just against blacks. They're not against blacks. No, it's like a rest of a lot of people. It's like a stand-in and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. All right. South Africa restaurants fits fit loose

license on top hiding alcohol inside T-bot. Okay, so this is already started. Okay. For one Tuesday, I thought she was helping you do it like that. I thought she was reading terribly and that was like, no, no, it's a Our one Tuesday press conference small time after a denue rules come into effect. Police Minister be key. Kelly like you weren't restaurants say them go lose the trade licenses. There are owners go go court case. Dem go lose the trade licenses.

There's them no baby band. No put alcohol inside your teapots for restaurants. So put alcohol inside bottles, wait them right, 0% alcohol. We swear them red, 0% alcohol. Do not put it in the middle where the bottles are read, the 0% alcohol, right? I see a very sober future, man. That almost sounded like the count. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, I know. I was, I was, I was not sure sober future, man. That almost sounded like the count. Yeah, that's true.

Oh, yeah. I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I'm not sure what I'm doing. Yeah, but future. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. One crappy joke. Ah, ah, ah, ah. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Oh, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Oh, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. We, we, we, Sabi or Chik's, No, the, um, talk, Olga, Selly. If we find something, we find, say, something So we stabby your chicks and know that I'm talk all got silly. If we find something, we find say something that different inside the teapots and no bity the inside the teapot, we go make sure say you lose your license. We go make sure say you lose your license.

How the fuck is that? We will make sure you lose your license. Like how is that easier? How is that? We will make sure you lose your license. Like, how is that easier? What? How is that? But that was written. Are you still speaking English? Oh, yeah.

I don't understand that. We're going to make sure they lose the license. We're going to make sure. In order to find a way to avoid the lockdown, who happened for April and May during this first COVID-19, wave some restaurants begin to serve alcohol inside teapots and odac containers. Odac containers.

Oh, yeah. Do you like our band way South Africa announced on Monday, go day in place until mid-January and police with support from the Army, go follow and force them? Oh, man. The liquor band's really fucking hot Oh man, the liquor bands really talking about me. What is the liquor band here? Well, I mean, you are just sure I'm not going to drink the bars.

That's an effective liquor band to me in my mind. Yeah, I mean, you just come to home alcoholics. Yeah, well, he's that too. But he's already that. So he likes to start out and then, you know, also, I drink a whole, it's a more rewarding. I just, I want to know if I can't go to a bar and talk to people and I can't go online and talk to people, where am I supposed to, where are we supposed to talk to people anymore?

Well, where is it? It's a video. Yeah, I mean, where? Social media. But we're kicked off. You guys are? Oh, yeah, I've been kicked off social media forever. And now they're shutting down parlor, Amazon's booting parlor off the service.

So where are we? Man, where are we supposed to go exactly? Wait, so what are you on then? Smoke signals, a telegram, like a weird Russian. Yeah, only analog for Dick. It really is. Hey. How did he, because he has,

he'll Trump got, Trump got booted up because most of the people in charge of Twitter are insane Democrats, like hugely left 99% of their employees are donors for anybody at the sea level, certainly. Cause they're running in collusion with the Democrat party to kick everybody off. So we can't talk about, so we can't just talk about anything. We can't talk about anything.

You just stuck there. They let the crazies on though. Oh, anyway. I think if you have a Twitter account, you're one of the crazies, so I'm still, that's my philosophy on that. That's like, stay on out of it. We have an animal corner?

I actually want to do it. Do you want? I actually want one. Yeah, for, yeah, let me, hold on, let me find them. I'll get animal corner stuff for you. I flag them all. Do you know what animal corner is? All right. Sean knows everything about animals. It's my it's my war questions. Sean's animal corner. Okay. I don't know everything that usually wins people send in facts and then ask I ask Sean if you knew them or not Mm-hmm, and I don't lie. Okay. No, it's totally the art system. Okay, this one's from gas and gas and heaps

Kangaroos Will wait in the middle of bodies of water to lure in predators when swims close, the kangaroo will hold its head under water until it drowns. Does you know that? What? No. That's how kangaroos any cent of video, too. Wait, wait, wait, wait. That's how kangaroos hunt.

They hide in the middle of water to lure in predators. And when they swim close, they stick their head in and drown them. They pin them down with their heads. Like the kangaroo pins them down. Yeah. You didn't know that. No. All right. That's what kind of what kind of predator. So they lure it.

The dog and there's one example, a wild dog. So that's that happens every day. They're just sitting there a wild dog. Wait, was that right? It drives by and they're like, oh, it's like a regular thing. What's the bank? We're all the wild dogs gather

and the kangaroos are in the water. Like, if you eat the water, water, you know, like a watering hole. So that's how for water. What civil is it? Like, they're like, area of body of water or forest is that? Cause I've seen them fight off dingoes and stuff, but that was out in the kangaroos in the forest.

Yeah, like, forest kangaroos, yeah. There has to be like a known, they have to figure that out by now the dogs, they have to figure out, okay, they're all waiting. They're not. Like alligators, they wait under there, like like kangaroos.

So you believe alligators will wait in water, but not kangaroos? No, so the kangaroos live in water. So that's a defense, the kangaroo. I don't know, he says. They'll wait to lure in predators. That's what like a dingo trying to heave. Because then he goes, Because then a smart guy,

Dingo's try to kill kangaroos. Right. So the kangaroos are saying, I'm going to get in the water, come on in and get me, and then I'll fuck you. That's what he's saying. Yeah, Scott it.

Okay, is it? That wasn't very clear. But would you have got it if he explained it like that? No. All right. I'm going to get that one. I didn't know that was like a defense. I don't know.

I don't know. Look, I'm just reading the emails. We'll say no. Okay. So I miss it either way. Mike, in fact, when in the cocoon, the caterpillar fully digests itself, releasing enzymes to dissolve all of its tissues. If you were to cut open a cocoon or a chrysalis, you wouldn't find something like a caterpillar growing wings,

it would just be caterpillar goo. Even though the creature is totally dissolved, including the neuro system, studies show they somehow carry memories from before the change. Did you know that? No, not like that. Yeah, goo, but then they come out as a butterfly. They reformed totally. I didn't know they totally reformed.

Yeah, I know that. They reformed totally. I didn't know they totally reformed. Yeah, I know. I know. I know that too. I knew they look like nothing like a caterpillar. No, they turn into a like melt into a plasm. Jesus. I better not.

You need to do. I've needed some zoo books, my friend. You've never seen yourself in front of a bar. I've never been skunked. You know, yeah. This is from Justin, Deering, all bears are born in the winter. This allows them to nurse while their mother remains in hibernation. Did you know that? Yeah.

Okay. Justin, you blew it. Justin Deering, you fucked up the skunk. They emerge like ready to kind of walk around and do things like that. Polar bears have fur on the soles of their feet. This helps them. You knew that, too. Of course.

Huskies have hair on the soles of their feet. No, they had hair. I know. Wish I had hair on my feet. They'd be lit. You have to eat second breakfast. What do you, let's, what would you, do you ever pop your feet up on that Patreon? Yeah.

Do you really? Do you have a section for my feet? What do you think of those guys? The feet guys? Actually, my ex-boyfriend was in a feet. Go on. No, he was in a feet. I don't know if he really was,

if he just said he was, he would always make jokes and talk about it. And I'd be like, I just wanna like have so good here at the end of the day. He'd be like, I'm just here. I was like, I'm down. I I was like, I'm doing that. I just want to, but like, he never actually, I don't remember if he did it.

I think the one time he tried to, he did it, but he would just like joke about like a feat. And then when we would have sex, he'd always like put like my feet like a pie is like, no. I just see, put like my feet like this. And he put my feet like, are my feet up up like here like put it on his face and like But he never like we went for it

But you're Feed up and then No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no So you're on your, you're gonna have to slow down. We're gonna have to wear a my in this situation. Back in the day, anyway. Okay, so the guy's leaning forward like this, right? This is his head or whatever, this is shoulders. I'm like this, and then he like, I'm still laying down like this, right? He picks my feet up.

I'm still having trouble. Can you do it with my girlfriend for this? So I can picture both your feet would be. So my feet would be here. Okay. And like my ass is here and my back is here. So he would like pull back and like put my legs up here and be like, yeah.

And like when he's doing that, he's like playing. He's like, low-key feet playing stuff. Yeah, I was like, I didn't want to come in, but he never was like, real about that. I was like, are you really the thing? He's like, no, I'm just kidding. Do you mention a lot for just kidding?

Like, all right. But he wasn't like, yeah, he, and he always rubbed my feet. I like that. I wasn't rubbing my feet was nice. Why would you, why do you want fur on your feet? Because it's cold and it makes you feel like cozy and warm, I don't know. Like some hobbit feet.

Yeah, well, we're on the top, on the bottom. On the bottom. Like, you wouldn't have to wear shoes anywhere. So I always lose my shoes places too, so it's like just built in. Yeah, I would do it. You have to, I mean, you have to. You have to.

You would have to. It's step on like dogs and dog shit. Dogs like that. I mean, it's pretty disgusting. You think women would shave their armpits, but they would let their, the bottom of the soul to their feet. But you gotta let me shave my feet.

Yeah, we're going to do a salon, you know, you got to get a lot of season there. Got it. And you know, legal salon. Shampooed and conditioned and stuff. You know, you're paying in the ass, wouldn't it? I mean, it would be easy to put your socks on one way and then just a nightmare to take them off.

Put them on. You know what I mean, going against the hair. Well, I mean, if the hair like had a, you know, strong direction, I guess, maybe. Oh, you think it'd just be like, I don't know, just like, I mean, just thinking like the hair on your head, you know, what do you have a calyx on your feet? Is that right?

I ain't exactly. Okay. It's probably the weirdest conversation we've had. So you did know that. That's two for Sean. Oh, yeah. Justin Deering, you messed it all up. That's two for Sean. So you're just enduring. You messed it all up.

Here's the final one, the tiebreaker from Dustin, Takiyama. European bison herds move by majority rule. Each bison votes by facing the direction it wants to go and the herd goes in the direction chosen by the largest number. I did not know that. Wow.

I didn't know that. Wow. I didn't know that. That's a fake victory. I always just thought it was like a generational thing where it's like we migrate to where water and food is at this time of year. They've got that kind of internal clock. They vote. I didn't know that it was, that seems kind of dumb.

Like, our system's way better. Having a bunch of voting machines that break down where it doesn't seem like they would evolve to be like, well, we think we should go in this direction. I mean, is it, is it to play two places that could, that could serve their needs potentially or it just, it seems kind of weird. No, I did not know that. We should do that. They should just, I'm voting day, we just stand in our house and face the direction of which way we're voting. Right. And then somebody comes around, the cops come around, you know, you really don't have to tell the cops twice to come over to your house. You're

really so lying there. Kill them all. What do you think about that? Sean, I think that's a good system. I'm down. Okay. I'll sign the petition. All right. I'm, I'm, I'm going to ratify an amendment. What do you think about that? Fuck yeah. Oh, I did ratify that shit. Let's do it. Okay.

Only the hottest women support ratifying amendments. Yeah, that's the ultimate protest. You tell the founding fathers to go fuck themselves. Your document was dog shit. I'm ratifying a fucking amendment over that. How's that for empowering women? We're gonna rewrite this shit, this trash that you guys made. Yeah.

Pense and we're rewriting it too. Mm, mm, mm, that's that. So that's what it is. That's that. Okay, go get bogged down in details. All right, everybody. That's it. Let's see voicemails.

This is the Dix Show. See you next Tuesday. Go to Ari, patrona.com slash Ariana. Ariana, Jolly. Ariana, Jolly. Ariana with the any, Jolly. And I gotta say, are you in better shape than the last time you were in here? Do you think I look like it? Yeah, I was like, how everybody's gay.

I do. We've only been seeing the same women for like nine months. Oh, I might have. Me too. I the same women for like nine months. Oh. Am I not? Me too, I've been seeing myself for nine months. That's for sure. But you've been obviously doing stuff during quarantine. She's one of the, I think you're one of the few

who actually goes, I'm gonna get in better shape. Or I'm gonna, you know, I'm gonna ride a boat. I would do a crazy breakup. So that probably is. Oh, it's the non-eating. Yeah. The food guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, it's the non-eating. Yeah. The food guy? Yeah.

Yeah. Why was it crazy? It was, it was. Yeah. You took all my shoes and it turned your hair gray, is that? No, no, no. But, no, I got my hair gray here, it's actually because of it. No, no, no, no, I just, yeah, it was a lot of stuff.

See, I like that. I've heard people rip it. It's like, why would you want your hair to be gray? Why would you want your hair to be gray when it's going to be anyway? No, I love chicks dying there too. I think it was great. Yeah, anyway, sorry. You were saying about this.

No, but yeah, it was just really weird, however, thing. Because when you're in COVID, you know, like you like, you know what I mean? Like you don't have any friends. So like your best friend is your person you're with. And so when like that happens, and you're just like, oh, kind of like, go through a mental thing.

We got some mental breakdown. Living together? That's Balzy, breaking up during quarantine. Yeah, yeah, it was, I mean, there's some infidelity and stuff too, but yeah, I wish she, I don't know how that's possible, but. How's that possible during quarantine?

I gotta go to this store, no. The bought, no. It was before quarantine. It was before quarantine. It was before quarantine and then found out that when you're in quarantine, you're like always like, then a part of you is like, wait, what do you do? You know what I mean? You start to, yeah.

He wasn't healthy for sure. He was walking the dog 32 times a day. You're right. No, it wasn't like actual but like, it was just, yeah. That's a weird situation. Oh my God. Oh my god. You experienced infidelity Matt fuck face Matt is gonna lose his mind Yeah, is he here is fuck face Matt? Are you getting anyone now? No, Matt. Do you want to do you want to take a shot? Do you want to talk to? Is fuck face Matt? You know we get a bunch of virgins right?

On the show. Hey, it's cool. I'm so that now. Oh, they are too. It's not by choice. It's okay. Just say, just say it's by choice and it's a life hack. And then no one will believe them. They'll believe you. He's not here. Oh, he missed a shot. All right. Let's do voicemail. This is the Dix show page on the conversation. Dix show. I just broke my check.

That's what he. I just can't hilly and you just broke up with your check. Spoon. What's with the I missed the joke. The spoon. The spoon. Because you collect spoons. I don't know. Maybe.

I don't know where that. Yeah. I don't know what they're saying. Chimp cell is his name what Chimp cell he was here. Well if he comes we'll do voice mail. This is this is a drum theme that Let me see who's in a drum cover Well, I'm sorry are you that sounds horrible. No, it's okay

It's a big learning lesson because he went off the deep end now, so I'm really the deep end of what? Just completely different out that I took Very dark. Oh, no. This is big Brian on drums. Who you guys go everybody? See next Tuesday? I'm making a cute spoon. Why are they doing that? It's good. He's sitting all the points. Yeah. Cantilians are woman-sheeted on you too.

Where are cantilians are you there with your horrible audio like normal? Oh, no, he's gone. Oh, there he goes. I heard what could have started to be horrible audio I thought ah there he is. It'll die. Let's see Cantillians It sounds better actually that's You're girlfriend cheated on you. Yeah, man, I have to say it's it's really tough. I have to say I understand exactly where you're coming from. Listen to this, fucker. You buy that shit. He doesn't understand what the hell. I mean, like, come on. Like, you know, it's during quarantine, you know, when you have somebody just cheat on you and just treat you like shit. I mean, I would never ever treat any woman like that

Let me talk Please thank you We know you can talk I'm down in Orange County. I'm only less than an hour away If you ever want to go grab a drink, I know some like little underground places that we can go to. Oh, thank you. That's so sweet. We're no ones around. I mean, under the, I mean, under the, I'm actually doing what the show right now. Thank you. Thank you very much. That's very, very sweet. Where's the picture of Cantillians with the beard? Post that in the chat, somebody. Cantillians,

do you have a job? I do a job. Great job. Yeah. He's an accountant. Wow. Yeah. How do you make it?

I'm making six figures right now, Ari. Oh, no. Anyone who says six figures means one at the front. That's what. Yeah, that's true mostly, isn't it? Oh no, don't put it in the balls up there. Come on. Perfect, that's a big deal.

You don't wanna see his balls there, no, they're putting his, they're, I don't know why they're doing that. Can't tell you, how do you feel about Jesus Christ? Okay, here we go. I love Jesus actually. I actually did it except Jesus a couple of years ago actually into my life. Really?

I was hiking through a... I was hiking through the mountains and I saw a blue J. And I realized, oh my God, the beauty of nature, the beauty of God, the beauty of Jesus in my life, it was a pretty surreal experience. Wow, I think about that. Converted by Blue Jay. Mm. I'm sure.

I'm sure. I'm sure. I'm sure. Yeah. If Matt's not going to take his shots, I'm going to take him a shot right now. That's what I'm saying. Okay, Matt's here too.

Hold on. Does this take a long time? What do you think about Ketillion's story about his religious epiphany? You think that's probably bullshit? Yeah, I appreciate you trying to relate to me. Oh, he wasn't trying to relate. Oh, no, trying to make me think he was trying to relate. What did the blue J though? You don't think he saw a blue J. And he's like, oh, fuck, I believe, of course, there's a god. Absolutely not. Okay, let's see. I was up in Nammoth.

No, actually, this is when I first got sober, I was honestly up in Nammoth Mountain. And I was going through a hike because I just need to kind of clear my mind. And I saw this amazing blue J and honestly, I kind of got me connected a little bit closer to God than Jesus. I'm just serious. So no, but I appreciate the honest that's better to say the words, kind of got me a little almost kind of correct. It's kind of that serious. So, no, but I appreciate that honest. That's better to whisper. Kind of got me a little almost kind of correct. Oh wow.

I feel you. I feel you on that. I understand. That's lit. That's dope. It happens probably also because of the sobriety, but still, yeah. How long have you been sobriety? It definitely helped.

You know longer sober, but. Oh, good. So that's it. Yeah, that's it. I would give you the face. Yeah. Just like when you go through phases, I would give you the face. Yeah. Just like when you go through phases, I went through a phase of sobriety. Just like your phase of Christianity, maybe.

No, I'm still religious. I don't know what else I can tell you. How long have you been into Jesus Christ? I've been, I was raised Christian, but I like ran away for a while. And then he came back to God. No, I just realized more things. Okay, let me get Matt in here. Matt, did you know that Ari's single?

Yeah, well, I'm way more, I just want to say for the record, I'm way more Christian than Kent Hilliants. I believe in Jesus, 100 more than Kent Hilliants. Are you better looking? No, well, you're first of all cantilians. It's not very gay. It's not very Christian to be gay.

You suck a bunch of punicies. You're not going to get in the hell. I don't like to know that. You can't call me that. I'm not a real castellian. I don't think. That's a good point.

Unlike cantilians, I am very, very Christian. So just one to already know that. Well, you know. On a scale of one to God, how Christian are you, do you think? Donald Trump, that's not right. Till very perfect. Well, the way.

So what would you do now? He's like, I'm blowing it, I'm blowing it. Now what would you do to take Ari on a date? Like what would be an ideal date for you for you guys? Yeah. An ideal date. Maybe go to church. Maybe go to relax the cantillion for, for trying God, I guess. Going to church? What do you think about that, all right? And persecution. There's none open.

Oh, there's none open. He asked for the prescute anybody. He's right in New York. Really? The Supreme Court just said so. Yeah. He's in New York. Yeah.

Anil. Don't hurt now. These people are. These people are godless. These people are outside Picture of me with a beard and chat so I just I want to get our is opinion. What do you think can't tell you looks like what would you? I'm just People think people think it's not like yeah, I'm not it's not about like

Come on, that's a very handsome guy. What do you think? Look at how big his head is. Yeah. Look, this is weird. That's nice. What do you think of that? What do you think of that?

Not bad, not bad. I'll take not bad. Yeah, you're not bad. If you want to be the bar, if you polite to me and I talk to you, I wouldn't be like, don't I get I wouldn't do this to anybody? Yeah, but all right, I'd be polite to you and I'd talk to you. I wouldn't be like, don't I get, I wouldn't do that to anybody. Yeah, but, all right, look, look, look. He leaves his ironing board up, okay? Go ahead, at least he can iron the clothes out of him.

In the back of a picture, there's an ironing board still up. So he's leaving it out every day. It works in his favor, actually. Looks like he cares about, you got to clean your room. Like, Jordan Peterson, the legendary drug addict says he owns clothes that you need an iron for okay you know that's all right all right no it's a good shot and it looks like I failed yeah you failed oh well you don't have to now you

have to beat yourself and you don't have to beat yourself up about it forever remember you miss a hundred percent of the shots you don't take all All right, anything make you rage? Can't tell you anything make you rage? Can't tell you anything make you rage? Yeah, actually, I do have something that makes me a rage. Fucking down here in Southern California, we have Indian casino billboards, right?

You drive past them and it's a bunch of young people like in tuxedos and so many. I'm having a class of time. I'm having a class of time. Just drinking, but I'm not working. This can see the terms of that laughing. And when you go to them, it's all just old Asian ladies. The old Asian ladies on, like there's no fun having.

Everybody books miserable. Oh yeah. And you think you're gonna have a great time but they're fucking lying to you. Never, ever, ever, ever allow any casino advertisements. They think they're gonna have a great time, but they're fucking lying to you. Never, ever, ever allow any casino advertisements. They're gonna have a good time. I think it's advertising in general. You go to Vegas and you get those cards

and it's like the hottest girl you've ever seen. Then she shows up and she's eating the girl. That's the hottest girl on the card. And you're like, yeah. Oh, very good. Yeah, you know what I always cracked me up about the casinos. Like we all know Southern California, we know Casino Morongo, right?

Yeah. I always thought that they about the casinos. Like we all know Southern California, we know Casino Morongo, right? Yeah. I always thought that they just made that name up because it's like moron go. You know, I never occurred to me, Sean. Just now I'm never gonna be able to not see that. Yeah, yeah, it's like, oh, let's just moron go. Yeah. Oh, he's stupid white assholes.

Stupid idiot. Come move your mind. I went to that, we went to that place and I got shit faced in the lazy river and then pretended that I couldn't get out for like probably 20 minutes until a woman came over and helped me climb out. That's one of the happiest moments of my life actually. That's really committing to a bit right now. Because the whole like jam up of everybody on their rafts because I was trying to get out and saying that I was too fat to get out

That was awesome. Okay, can't tell you inspired By Ari I'll talk to you later. Okay. Hi. Hi. Are you gonna join her patreon? No Why would you fuck Matt? Are you still there? Yeah, I'm still here. Does anything make you a rage, buddy? What makes me a rage is, one of my friends told me he was disappointed in me in the other day. So when grown men tell other grown men that they're disappointed in them, that was pretty, that was pretty surreal.

That definitely makes me a rage. Why was're disappointed in them. That was pretty, that was pretty surreal. That definitely makes me a rage. Why was he disappointed? Yeah. Because of, I think it was one of my opinions about the capital siege and I thought it was, I said it was the most, the best day in American history and maybe the last 100 years. And he said, I'm just so disappointed in you. I thought you were better than this. So that was pretty funny. I got to disappoint my nuts in your mouth. How about that? You don't need to, I don't need to. That's like what I said, Terrent, to, you know, you're going to, it's don't take disappointed.

Don't take the parental time when you're stuck a bunch of couch. Get out of your system. It's just like, it's so weird how people defend the government. Like they, I don't know, they get a choice in it. So they think it's theirs. Kind of like they defend it. Like it's their parents. If you told somebody, man, your dad sucks. We're like, well don't know, they get a choice in it. So they think it's theirs. Kind of like they defend it. Like it's their parents. If you told somebody, man, you're a damn sucks. You'd be like, well, you know, he's doing, don't say that. I'm like, man, your government sucks. Like, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow.

It's part of me. Oh, yeah. So that about right. You're right. Anyway, even more funny, Dendy, the MAGA people, like switching up on the police is the A-CAB defund the police people saying, well, actually, the lady totally deserved it. She should have been following the law, you know. She actually wasn't a good person, actually, you know, shocking, but yeah, all cops are

bastards. Well, except for that, that guy, you know, he was, it's all, all alone is job. Everything's all a cart. It really is. Yeah, fuck people. They're so stupid. That's why I think I could trick them into ratifying this man. All right. What did I, did I say anything to Kentillians? No, all right. No, he, he, yeah.

Go later. Go later. Okay, buddy. Fucking Kentillians. What about this guy, Ari? What about that guy believes in God? That's not Photoshopped. You know, in case you were wondering.

That's actually, that's a filter he uses to go on the line. Oh, here is speaking of Maddox. Here is his thoughts on the, oh, you know, I don't even care. I just want to listen to voice mail. Yeah. Yeah, Dick and Sean, it's the extra to hear the complaint with the rage. All right. And I'll tell here at complain with a rage. All right.

And I'll tell you what makes me a rage is people complaining, this is the first thing people want to complain about. It's how bad 2020 was for everyone. We know. And I just can't relate. I just don't care. Shut up. Did we all decide that co-missory was the newest favorite thing to do?

2020, it's such a bad year. I was thinking this. No, I wasn't. Shut the fuck up and quit being miserable. Tell me about it. Give me a phone. How much you hate a year? It's getting shut up every year sucks this bad.

No, it doesn't. No, it doesn't. No, it doesn't. How would you know traumatic shit this year? This is. I feel like an empty husk in my stomach all day every day. He took a weird thing to look forward to. He took a weird turn.

I thought it was going to be just shut the fuck up. We know. Yeah. He's saying like, it's the same every year. And I can't get, I can't get on board with that. Buddy, now you really need to be told how bad this year was apparently. That's the only thing I can take away from that. Look what you've done.

And you did it to yourself. I can't understand that kind of depression. Every year is this bad. I'm like, oooh. Yeah, that's on you. No. All right. Let's see here. Hey, Dick. Hey Sean. It's your old pal DP. Hey DP. whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo whoo out over by the call I can't go to the store I have crippling anxiety and that somebody at a party of twenty with strangers and she is bragging

about how her crippling anxiety makes it to where she can't go places like the store because of all the strangers yeah she's at a party with twenty people she doesn't know strangers fucking rage is whenever I see something on the current events like the news that happened a couple of days ago the whole occupy shit trying to turn over to the vote of my there goes every fucking conversation for the next two weeks because god forbid i go week without having to talk about the same god damn thing

all the time and the third and most racy de par all right he's a cram it all in and he's a dp what is this cram it all in the dp pot the is what we got good for the hot not today god yeah and then uh... what time is it yeah

four hours later all of a sudden wham and over we're like all the sky keep blowing through to be already started today you've made all the fucking commitment and you just got to power through it like this conversation. I should be talking like I'm hungover

But I'm afraid I've already started my day hangover list So you know I have to continue the rest of my day pretending like I don't feel like fucking you can't those are fucking weird But I said I feel like I'm gonna throw up after yelling so Awesome, I love you like I'm gonna throw up after yelling. So, uh, it's awesome. I love you. Like, thanks D.P. Tell me where you live. Both of you. Go throw up.

Going up. Now, he can cram a D.P. D.P.s got, uh, he's got good credit with me at least. Was he? Yeah, he always three, four. Yeah, but he always, he's always entertaining shit when he, especially when he complains about his wife. That's always good.

That's always good. When he gets real low, it's like it's your old pal D.P. Why do they do that? Why do they do this? Oh, okay. And my wife says, Hey, Dek, no, it makes me a rage. Recently I found out my sister is selling nude clothes

for herself on Snapchat Snapchat which is all in fine or whatever you'd't tell our parents about it. And you literally beg me, that's anything. Okay. Which is it? Women empowerment or something you're ashamed of. That's right. Tell you what, all you got to do is never lecture me about it again.

And I won't say shit. We could both not say something. Deal. How about that not say something. Deal. How about that? That's a strike a deal there. You have to do not kind of send to me about this issue. You don't even mention it.

I'll do the same thing. Right. How about that? None of my business. None of your business. What do you think about that, Marie? He's got a- He's got a point.

I know, I'm not,, I'm the wrong person, because I don't get the whole, and women empowerment, it's like show my asshole. You don't think that's empowering for the women to be able to show their asshole to men who hate them? No.

I probably don't think so either. I think a lot of women go into it thinking, yeah, I'm doing it power, but then it really is like, it's a lot of the men are behind that whole movement. To like, and the ones that are really the feminists with the baby bangs and the m it thinking, yeah, I'm doing it in power, but then it really is like, it's a lot of the men are behind that whole movement. To like, and the ones that are really the feminists with the baby bangs and the mullets, like, dude.

Men are behind the movement to get women to take their clothes off, you're saying. Walker, but the women, like, the women super women are movies to get your money idiots. I don't know, because women are like, yeah, this is, but it's like, a lot of, I know a lot of girls that aren't also making that much money. And they're like, yeah, it could be.

And it's like, okay, cool, but like literally like, it's fine, you pay them five bucks. It's like, you're lowering your. I think women don't really, they're not prepared for the customer service aspect of it, you know, and the marketing part. Yeah, they're just like, oh, I thought I could just be nude and nothing happens.

It's like, oh, no, I'm nude and nothing happened. No, you have to lead on guys constantly and get them to shell out. Like, it's a vice industry. You make your money on the attic. And it's selling the connection, right? Like, only fans, that's a whole... Is it they can get to you, I think, like, talk to you

and stuff? Yeah, people like, I got put on my poor $500. You can get my enough. I'll talk. Your phone number, you put out for $500. You can get my number. Your phone number, you put out for $500. Jesus. Oh, wow. What? I'll tell you.

Listen, there'll be one person that'll do it. One. I had a credit couple of crazy stalkers. I'll track you down and kill you. My phone number. It's just black. I'm after weird. Oh, and when I say use it wisely, you send me a day pick of your weird.

Have you heard of, do you know the sex panther? Have you ever heard of that? You paid money for texting back guys. There was a way, I did that once, not sexing as, but a patron, not patron, it was a, it was called like a lua or something. And people would text you and you'd get, so I would just like talk and I can talk all day.

But then they would try to make it section, I was like nah, da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da okay here we go something about the wonder woman movie hey dick this is uh... trucker and the uh... to call and point out something that you guys miss about wonder woman eighty four maybe shawnton crabberatist and uh... he actually set through the movie yeah i did uh... it has a point uh... important message that um... to be brought to your attention in the third act when you know they're the whole

time they're fighting this guy who's you know granting everybody's wishes and then the third act Wonder Woman looks straight down the barrel and tells the whole audience which is basically you know a movie for women made by women. She looks straight down the barrel and says hey, just because you want something, doesn't mean that you can have it. And, you know, that's something that I thought you guys would be really interested in, do you really think about? Call me back.

Call me back. Ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha This is named Travis the trucker. No, trucker Andy. Trucker Andy and his whole lot of honk honk. Did he do honk honk at the end? Going back honk honk? I think he was in his truck. Look at this is what, this is a better picture of cantileons, what do you think? Definitely.

That's what I thought you were gonna stand. Oh my god, cantileons. That was a stereo, a exploded face one that you did send. That one, yeah. I heard that, I heard that Wonder Woman rapes someone in that movie. Is that true? Like she transforms some guy and she takes over his mind and puts her old boyfriend in

it and only she can see that it's her old boyfriend, but it's his old body when he looks in a mirror. Yes. And then rapes him. Like, yeah, brainwash is him into pretending that he's it's it's it's a No, it's the guy from the first it's whatever is fucking it is a crisp pine is what happened to the guy's body that she's using It's still his body. It's the double rape. Yeah, wow and then at the end she sees him, you know back like you know He's like I have to I have to unwish my wish

Everybody has to unwish their wishes. Did you unwish the rape? Yeah. No, and then she sees the guy, you know, at the end, and they have this like brief little conversation, you know, they're like, this polite little conversation. Oh, because he doesn't know anything about it. Oh, because he's not, he's not Chris Pine anymore. So he was just magically roofied. Yeah. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What a phenomenal. The DC universe just gets better with every movie that they put out. Yeah. They do nail

those live action ones. Okay. Here we go. Let's try. Let's just a couple more. And then we're just done. I'm just done with the whole thing. I'm done, dude. I'm done, dude. This is about the whole hate about hiring so many women for Home Depot. I currently work at Home Depot for about, I want to say about three months already. He's about done. They, how long they last. The orientation and training is very adamant that he are trying to diversify and get more women and more

not more light people in basically but it's always been like that uh... i've always noticed that guys are in the warehouse and i wonder why but you know when women are playing there is well just a couple of stores and we do have the option to work at the stores, but they'll also reduce our pay. So I'm currently working in the BDC area

and I'm majority in the Florida list. All the guys here have been on Home Depot for 30 years and under, the guys are just in the warehouse. And all the women that are applying for Home Depot are in the stores That's why so many women are in the bucket stores and honestly I always just download the app to tell me where the hell I'm looking for like two by fours or whatever the app will tell you oh I'll

16 blah blah blah. I mean, I always use the apps for it, but I know people and home people do sucks. You have your shine? We'll put your stuff in. I forgot to mention the Axe Body Spray condemned the protests at the Capitol. We'd rather be lonely than with that mob. Axe condemns yesterday's acts of violence and hate at the Capitol.

We believe in the democratic process and the peaceful transition of power. This is Acts body spread. Is that going to result in the end? They're really going to, like, they're just out there. Any more. Because everybody forgot about them. Dr. Coke said Trump is no longer allowed to drink Diet Coke. Did you see that?

Really? They said, who's fat now, Trump. Do they probably paid like somebody to toss and then take a big like, wait, is relevant again? What is the other, what other brands weighed in on this one? Oh, who the fuck cares? What brand would any brand surprise you? No, they came out and said, Arby's, yesterday was not a big horsey. Yesterday was not a big Montana day. Oh, yeah. I only care if they're like creative, but no, of course, of course. And the rage against the machine guy said, like, that's not, he came out condemning the riots, raging against, well, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. What was one of their, like, fuck, no, I won't do what you tell me. That was one of the lyrics. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck. Yes, I will do what you want to be, you want to be Ari's Photoshop guy. I don't even know what that means, Travis.

It sounds like you want her to send you pictures first that you can take it. I don't know if I trust that. You can get a tanker with. Did Subway release something? Coca-Cola? What brand's way? Subway, we no longer hire pedophiles. One of those, just in case you were wondering.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, Jared. Oh, Coke did. I remember Coke statement on a Capitol. Yeah, as everyone was on it when they, I'm just kidding. Oh, they should have been. That, man, if Trump, I looked in some other eyes. They were.

They were pretty, they were pretty out there. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. If Trump, when Trump started, I thought that his sobriety was the secret to his success. Now I see that it has been his undoing. If he was a drinker, if he drank even a fraction of what I dig, he would have mowed through

all his political opposition like it was nothing. He would be, he would currently be the emperor. Hot takes. Oh, man. He, way too much understanding sobriety brings you. You could tell he was beaten down for, yeah, here's Coca-Cola statement for 250 years. The United States has stood as a beacon for democracy, a shining light for the world on how different perspectives and ideas can strengthen society.

This is a beverage that sells you addictive corn syrup. Yeah. Right? Yeah. And that has been in trouble multiple times for using slave labor to bottle their poison, right? We are all stunned by the unlawful and violent events that unfolded. We are all at Coca-Cola.

I don't know. Oh, wait, here's another funny one, Sean. Before we go, this is the last one. I swear, this is the last one. Here's a Middle Eastern guy on TV talking about how to beat his wife. Really? Yeah, I'm not going to play that one though. Okay.

Why do you fucking tease me? Teachers talking about shooting drills. Talking about performative, performative victimhood. Yeah. This is a teacher. Someone that wasn't talking about them for a couple minutes. So she had to come to the rescue. I don't feel sorry for Congress at all.

Oh, I'm sorry. Did you have to hide under your desk because of guns? Wow, wow, wow. I've only had to do that six times since kindergarten. School is terrifying. Maybe now they'll pass gun reform. One of my ninth grade students today. Oh, that's great.

I've been doing that since, yes, my, yeah, music teacher here. I've had to train kindergartners. How to use the Zyla phones. Everybody stands back. Music teacher here. Situation's well in hand. I've had to train the kindergartners how to use the

xylophones as barricades since we don't have desks in the music room and use the bars and mallets as projectiles. And fucking dump it over xylophones and getting down behind them in a sniper position. Oh my gosh. I mean, we should have all been trained to do that. Yeah, that would have been more fun than music class. It was pretending to set up for it since that. I used to break down crying because I didn't want something to happen to my sisters. The cops used to come by the rooms and bang on the doors. At this point, I've stopped crying and accepted this. Accepted that nothing's happening.

Have you finally accepted the cops would bang on the doors? Just like a pop quiz. Yeah. Are you prepared for chair in there? Yeah. Are you prepared for, okay? Yeah. You're all dead.

You're all dead, fail. All right. My kids doing remote learning. Oh, here's a, here's a mom. Here's America's best mom. My kids doing remote learning this year is the only reason they're allowed to get light up shoes because I can't have their cute little feet giving away their hiding spot in the event of an intruder in school.

I've never thought about that. I mean, nobody has that. How many, how many, how many? But why did she say they're cute little feet? That had a little, and in the kitty, kitty bang bang, it shouldn't have also been cute. She didn't mix the two. But wouldn't she train them to use, see typical woman, train the light up shoes, light them up, and then throw them as a distraction.

Yeah, I was like, what was that? But you use your xylophone and your mallets. Right. Exactly. What a what a farce these people are. What a complete joke. Their entire lives are stupid thoughts are entertaining for us. It's entertaining.

All right, goodbye everybody. All right, thank you. Thank you.