The Dick Show - Episode 252 - Dick on Unexpected Guests

Episode Date: March 30, 2021

Jamming up world trade, my cancer, blood drive scams and big leaguers, inappropriate tele-doctors, Ethan Ralph calls in about the recent fracas, Vito calls in about Magic the Gathering MS Paint cards, Amazon drivers pooping in their vans, a 14 year-old bangs his mom's friend, guys who want to date a bro, the juice cleanse was a big mistake, Jon del Arroz, and a call-in fails to materialize; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

We live in hell, right? You know, I was just thinking that. I was just thinking that yesterday. No, I mean more like a philosophical level. Like it's like, if there is a hell, I think earth is it. And if you're going to be rewarded in the afterlife, it's just for getting through and basically leaving a little more good than that don't get sucked into all that goodness stuff.

I just, I'm having fun with it. Like it's, I really think it's like God. Like this world is, like this world is just, it's a terrible place. It's a terrible place when you think about, you know, all the serious stuff. You go, God, how could, you know, that's why I'm glad about the cancer that I have. So this is what you, okay, it's cancer, 100%.

Yeah. The stabbing pain in my throat. Yeah. It's not going away. Mm-hmm. It's ironic that I would get the throat cancer. That's why I'm, it's the funniest cancer that I would get, right? Drill cancer. Yeah, we're going to take away. He can't be able to talk no more. Yeah, that's like Picasso can't paint. Right, right, right. Take it away from Superman. Can't walk. Yeah. Oh, painful. Every time I get a voice box, I'm going to put, they're going to put a woman's voice box in. So I sound like a lady.

A final insult. They'll give me like a little, a computer guy who can, that I can talk with. You'd probably make like twice as much money if you, if you said what you say on a woman's voice. Yeah, probably I would twice as much money. I go to the teladoc. Oh my god. The teladoc. Do you have, have you seen?

I've heard about these. I go to the Teladoc. Oh my God. The Teladoc. Do you have you seen, have you? I've heard about these. Teladoc, so the pandemic started and now they're just doing Teladocs. What is it? Oh yeah, yeah. Complaining about something in the chat. But it's your doctor, right?

I don't know, I've never had a doctor. Yeah, I don't understand where people get, like I remember having one as a kid, but now. Yeah. No, no, no, no, it happens. I never did either until I found one that was recommended to me by somebody. Now I like, yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Bigtittydoctor.com. Do you want a primary care physician that has big tits? She'll talk to you over the internet. You don't have to go in. Yeah, like I'm pretty sure I can stick a fucking popsicle stick in my mouth and go, eh, yeah, right? What about I don't need to go somewhere and all the time in your life that you've

wasted going to the job pressure, you can just order a blood pressure. It's high. You know what? It's high. I went to that. So that's your blood pressure. It's high. You know what? It's high. I went to the, so how's your blood pressure? High. Fucking perfect. Actually, I went to go give blood. I'm alive. I went to go give blood a couple weeks ago, really? To see, yeah, because they give you a COVID antibodies test. And I wanted to just shove it in everyone's face. I've been immune this whole time. Yeah. So I go to give blood. Immediately, first of all, I've always been annoyed that you can't, you don't get anything for it.

But there's just this whole moot, the giving blood people think they're better than you. Big blood. And they always know like, oh yeah, I give, you throw that out of the party. I was thinking about getting blood. Some mother of a fucker will come up and go, oh yeah, I give blood, I give blood every six weeks as often as I can. I even shave the date off and give it out.

A lot of companies do it. A lot of companies do it. Companies do it, a blood drive? Like Disney does it. Yeah. Disney takes your blood from you. Well, they'll bring people to, if you want to donate blood,

yeah, they'll bring people to the lots. They did that in high school too. They're just harvesting your fucking blood. They're giving you, oh, I guess I know because I got in trouble for this. Wait, wait, wait, wait. So I'm working three threads deep on this story. I'm like, I'm like, they would take high school students blood?

Aforcibly. Kids can't determine whether or not they should give their own blood. And they would like to them. That's what I didn't think that kids did. I haven't thought about that. But is I did the announcements in high school. Wasn't for the teachers.

Now the teachers would drink the blood of the kids. Yeah, how could I be so stupid? I did not see that. I did the NIs, I just, in order to, I thought it was funny. I got two liters of blood or whatever to show how much they took out of you. And literally you had two liters of literal blood. Just show how much they took out of you. Literally, you had two liters of literal blood.

Just water. I went to the science lab. Yeah. I jisd in it. I filled it up with jizz. That's a lot of jizz. I put a my little pony in there. It wasn't funny because it hadn't rebooted the show yet.

So it was like an 80s my little pony. Yeah. Was people are like, what? And I'm like, don't, you're not going to get this, but your kids. I cannot. Yeah. You guys aren't quite ready for that yet. And Justin and I are watching and class going,

huh, yeah, you guys aren't quite ready for this, because I was coming on the announcement. I got kicked off the announcements. Can you believe that for that? For that. Yeah. I was coming into the jar. That's it for you, my little pony.

I said, you guys aren't gonna get this, but your kids are gonna love it. Yeah. And I said, here's a little pony. I said, you guys are right. You're just drinking and get this, but your kids are gonna love it. Yeah. And I said, here's what they're gonna take out of you at the blood drive. Two leaders, whatever they take out of you. I don't know. Somebody told me I just got the science lab.

Well, and it was a shocking amount. They measure blood and pints. Pints? Yeah. Leaders, two leaders. Maybe I messed up the. Maybe I messed that up. That's a lot.

Today's such an amazing day. Usually is a horrible day. Really, but you're in hell. But today in hell has been a great Satan. It must have been, most have slept in because we were treated with a tremendous bounty of hilarity. I can tell you can hardly contain yourself. Yeah.

Yeah. You have that contain yourself. Yeah. Yeah. You have that. You have that. You have that. Eric Cartman. That Eric Cartman. Mo-me? Yeah. I'm gonna, like, this is the greatest thing ever.

Hey, Justin. It's like when he's putting his head in. This is your brother, Marvin. Yeah. Marvin Wang. That cousin, yeah. This is your cousin, Marvin. Marvin Wang.

Oh, I hope Ralph calls in today. You know that new horse you're looking for? You know that new cum video you're looking for? Look at this. I hope everybody calls in who is involved in the fracas. Oh boy, me too. I had to test. When multiple people are involved in a fracas as you put it,

I don't even want to call it an altercation. It was a full blown fracas. Fracas. Fracas. Is it fracas or fracas? What is it? What is it? Is it fracas or fracas?

Fracas. I think you either want it, but in either case, it's a funny word. Fracas, they say with an AW, some smart ass just. A ruckus? A ruckus. There was a ruckus? A ruckus. There was a ruckus. A ruckus with a ruckus attached to it.

How about a ral? So the announcement said, why did you do that? Why did you bring out all that water and say, this is how much blood they're gonna have to give? That's a lot of blood. You scared everybody off the blood drive. I said, oh man, I had no idea it would do that, but secretly is because I'm very angry that you can't sell.

Like you're just going around gilting people into giving their blood so that hospitals can do all their surgeries for free. That's like the gas of the hospital. They need the blood to be able to fuck you over for their overpriced surgeries or whatever. And they're getting that for, it's like if a theorem had just free gas. Here's we're doing NFTs. Well, it's like the Olympics. Yeah All the Tesla like the other talent works for free. Oh, you're representing your country. Mm-hmm. They make my Conscious of dollars of dollars. Yeah, everybody's making money except me

It's a guy in the chair with blood with the person you really need the blood blood. How about like, the blood bags? It had enough money for the Teddy Grams that I got to sit in by myself, socially distancing, and eating afterwards. You clearly had money for the Teddy Grams. There's a reference. Where's the rest of it? What if Teddy Grams were, I don't know, what if Teddy Grams costed 200 bucks?

That sounds reasonable. Maybe I go by my own Teddy Grams. A little something for the fucking lives. They'll be no money. They'll be no money. All of it, yeah. But on your deathbed, you'll receive total consciousness. All over the walls.

They got a whole pointification system. If you come in, you got to download our app so we can hammer you about how you should be giving, I just, I really annoys me. Same with the organ donors. You can't, you're telling me, when I die, nobody wants to shell out $250,000 for this heart. Maybe not this heart, but you could, you know,

a normal person, maybe. You could at least get a house out of this shit. Yeah. And don't start with the rich people would get to the front of the line. I have news for you. You're first of all, you're under 13, you're a child, so you shouldn't be listening to this show. It're first of all, you're under 13. You're a child. So you

shouldn't be listening to this show. It has very harsh language and it's very unhealthy. Secondly, rich people are cutting to the front of the line anyway. Yeah. How many hearts did Cheney get? Well, no, you know what? That's interesting. I was just, I was just going to bring, I was just going to bring him up where the, they said the people that I read an article, they were saying that basically he waited. I was going to say, he waited. What is it? You're cockamani theory of your own.

About the length of time. You're an article. Well, they were talking about, they said, no, he waited. He got on the list on this. He waited about a decent length of time given his, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like it wasn't like, he needs a heart transplant. He's in there. He's in there. I don't know about that.

But, all right. So maybe I'm wrong. Well, I don't know. I mean, it's said, yeah, for, because it's, you know, it goes to, they weigh factors, right? For like, you know, who needs it? Like who, you know, are you going to give this guy a heart and a bunch of other shits going to kill him anyway? Is he a good match?

Is he a good liar? Is he a good liar? For the criteria, he was, he was about what you would expect to wait. My dog is maybe a little less, but a good liar. For the criteria, he was about what you would expect to wait. My dog is maybe a bull penis. Man, this is the most horrifying thing about getting a dog. They send his home with a bully stick, something called a bully stick. Stinks smells like the inside of a foot. Smells like very bad pussy, very, very bad.

Dude, it's fucking rotten. But she loves it. She keeps munching on it all day. I said, wow, this is incredible. What is this? very, very bad. Dude, it's fucking rotten. But she loves it. It keeps munching on it all day. I said, wow, this is incredible. What is this? It's like, oh, it's a bullcock. It's a cock of a bull that they've chopped off

and warped into it. And it's terrifying. That's horrifying to me. You go into the store and then the bull feels. This is cruel. He's dead. Cruel. You go into the store and it's just bull penises row after row, short ones, thick ones,

ones that climb on rock like bull cocks screwed up. Some Jewish ones, a circumcise, some other ones, a lovely room of death you have here with the bull. Yeah, right. So then that's what I mean, it's a weird thing. It's weird things on co's on Cox all day. Yeah, my dog. Anyway, it's a weird thing that like, it's just like,

oh yeah, it's just bull dick. So I did, so I ruined the blood drive for school. Whoops, so well. Yeah. I go to give blood already angry that I'm not being paid for this and that no one is being paid for this when hospitals are just raking down, raking down money.

Don't ever let them think that they don't have money to pay. Do you know how much money is in insurance companies? Insurance companies. It's a big racket. People, people need the blood. They have their COVID testing set up. They have their fucking COVID testing set up when you walk in. Because you have to like put your face to get a temperature read. Oh, the scan. Yeah. A little scan thing to see if you're okay to enter the building.

Yeah, sure. And these, these chicks set it up. So it's like at four foot eight for them. Yeah. So they want, they're like tweedle dumb. It's a world centers around them. Yeah. They're like, all right, go ahead and get your temperature thing. It's pointing at my chest. Yeah. Well, you just got to bend down. Yeah. Oh, so're like, all right, go ahead and get your temperature thing. It's pointing at my chest. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, so I'm not only giving you the blood, I have to find out that's already a rage inducing, you know, point for you.

I mean, I had to bend over. I had to bend down. I see that you set it up for you selfishly, not that, you know, not that a short person could come in and you could just get a stool for them to step on. Yeah. Or something like that. Everything is okay. Yeah, let me just, is this good enough for my fucking temperature?

Like wow, your temperature's really rising quickly. Yeah, on that. Anyway, why did I even start talking about this shit? Cause I have cancer. Right. Cause I'm sure I have the cancer. The tell of this, tell, let me start this. I have like a nodule on your vocal cord or something.

I would, that would be worse I would rather have cancer than an module okay because my mom has been warning me about Noj was my whole life and for her to be right that's the worst yeah the real Tragedy Welcome to dick you need to get you got to just the show, Webster contest. Coming to you live from Mount Brook, deep in the heart of the city of failure. I'm your host, this is your host, Dick Mashlin,

AKA the 20 million dollar man. Boater America's worst Mexican 102 weeks running. Is that right? Joining me is always as world touring LA based comedian Sean, the audio engineer. Hello, Dick. What's up buddy, thank you for joining us again, everybody for this very unhealthy program.

Thank you for not killing yourself. Look at the dogs, mellow. The dog sitting through the you for not killing yourself. Look at the dogs mellow. The dog sitting through the intro for the first time. Traumatized. Very traumatized. Oh, God, she was very traumatized. Mom went away for the weekend. So the dog spent a lot of time in bars.

I've never heard 10 women at the same time table full of, I walk into the bar with the dog, 10 women at the same time in one table. 10 women. I was like, table. Oh! 10,000. Wow! Oh yeah. Wow. Did I just walk into a tuna factory or are you just happy to see me?

The teladoc that I went to. Oh yeah. So I said I've got a throat problem here. What's the deal, Doc? Yeah. By the way, this is amazing. This is the most satisfied I've ever been. You can just call a doctor. We don't have to do all that pretending to go in

and zoom thing or something. Yeah. Yeah. This is fucking don't ever take this away from us. Please. The doctor says, well, you know, you might have a little bit of strep. You could get that from going down on your girlfriend. So what the fuck? What the fuck? What are you doing? I don't want, where are you? And he's like, you know what, I'm not saying stop doing that either. What doctor is, doctor is, that's the first, I don't know, he was out of the gate.

Yeah, and he, I don't want to sound homophobic. You talking about the gate voice. So though, you're talking about the cancer that I have. Yeah, so I was gonna say, not the strap. Well, he said it's a TV. Yeah, he's like, well, you probably got some kind of a bacteria going down on your girlfriend, which I'm not saying to not do.

I'm like, wait a minute, what is he did? What do you, he said that, she was sitting in the fucking, she said, what is this now? I said, aren't there more likely places, like I mean like a kids? Is this important to the fucking diagnosis that I got throughout all the time. What if I write?

Uh, yeah. What if she was going down on some on a girl and I got it from kissing her? Do you ever think of that dog? Does everything of that doc? What else? What kind of doctorations? I don't know if it was a real teledoc. I don't need.

I want you blue, California dot net. Who knows? Well, they're trying to definitely put as much money on their pockets as they can. I don't know why it was important to the diagnosis, but now it's all I can think about is this guy, Listping is like, but I actually, I absolutely,

but you should definitely keep doing that. You definitely want to have a good time. I'm like, what the fuck, kind of doctor, doctor Ruth? What kind of doctor are you? Seriously? What kind of hotel is this? Yeah.

All right, medicine didn't work, so it's most assuredly cancer. Magdix has responded to the offer that the gigantic, really. $4,000 offer for him to do a show with Patty C. Cups, a one hour program that you would be a complete idiot offer for him to do a show with patty see cups. Yeah. One hour program that you would be a complete idiot to not take this money from. I would never take that money.

Uh, Carl, I'm shocked that Carl threw in his 2K. I don't know Carl rolled that big. Well, you know, apparently he does. But 80s girls said dedicated. Maybe it's color. Maybe it was Randy said it's probably because he knows that Maddox will never take it. Stupas ignorant and dumb as Maddox, as much as Maddox loves leaving money on the table, car out of virtue, but it's out of spite, out of stupidity.

Here's, let me see. Here's the, no, no, that's not the right one. Here is, I accidentally pulled up the Riley Ralph fist fight oh no really this happened here's Maddox responding here's banana docs excuse me responding to the four thousand dollar offer all he has to do is one hour podcast with patty seecups yeah two, four thousand dollars is split between them. However much they, what kind of idiot isn't a piece? Wouldn't take that. What kind of an idiot wouldn't take that? Right? Well, no matter how much money, there's a reason that we're making fun of them both all the time. Yeah. And that's one of the reasons.

Correct. Here is the, the question was posed in chat. Banana docs, I heard there's $4,000 of you do a podcast with a guy named, I don't know if he's doing it. This dickhead is doing a bit where he can't speak no good, I guess. Banana docs, I hear there, I heard there's a $4,000 of you do a podcast with a guy named Patrick Michael. He means it sounds pretty, oh, then it's, then it's a little, it makes a little more sense, right? Sounds pretty lucrative. Okay, here's your response. Here's what you've been waiting for Sean. Oh, here's what I've been waiting for all my life. All you have to do with me, I'd actually say yes. Like always. All you got to do is say yes. Come on.

Who else could we raise? Obviously. Yeah, 69 Jo Kings. Yeah. Funny, I don't know. No, I don't. Who else? There you go. There it is. Not gonna read it. Just didn't read it.

There you go. His reading has improved. He's reading ahead now. Yeah. He's learning. You're right. He's reading ahead. You're right.

Very good. Very good. God. Very good job. So I guess that's, I don't know if that's the official response. I mean, it sure seems like it. Um, that's banana dox is response perhaps Maddox is a better businessman maybe Maddox will have a say in it. I don't know. But box mad might have a little sage wisdom.

Oxman might want to throw it in. You know, Matt Mottenf, you such a dipshit. Yeah, there's money on the table. I mean, uh's cooler. I mean, you know, from maybe if he had a little scratch in his pocket, he'd get a tender day. Too grand, but, you know, he's got to live his own life. Yeah, he's got to learn. He's on the learning stage of his 43s, not my job. $2,000 though, it doesn't split a lot of, he's got a lot of people gunning for that money.

Ox, man, banana, docks, meow, docks, Dracula, he's got a lot of docks. It's not, it seems like a lot to us who are just one person, but he's got eight or nine guys. Everybody wants a piece. He's got all kinds of relatives that come out of the woodwork. Maddie Loss. It's like somebody who makes it to the NFL out of the hood,

you know, all of a sudden sudden it's like, hey! Right? Do you know you had so many fucking cousins? No, no. The Suez Canal is jammed up. Did you see that? Yeah. Is a woman driving it?

I don't know. Is a woman driving it? I know in the Exxon Valdez crash. We knew who was driving it and who would be mad at immediately, but we don't know who to be mad at right now. So I'm thinking it might be a woman, maybe. I know there's a fake news going around. It's not that Egyptian woman. I still want to know who I need to be mad at.

No, I don't know. I don't know who I watched in there. Yeah, seems to be. Can it stay lodged? Can we learn nothing from COVID? It seems like it is staying lodged. A year ago, I know it was a big problem that we have a global supply chain.

We really got to look at this global supply chain problem. Somehow that got over, somehow white supremacy appeared. That became a bigger problem. It's powerful. Maybe white supremacy got the tanker caught in the Suez Canal. It's all that we need to do to stop the globalization of the world to jam boats in the Suez

Canal. Is that where Ted Kaczynski messed up by sending bombs? All you need to do is get little shitty boats and cram them into the Suez Canal. And it springs the whole world to a halt. Is that it? Is that the spine? Do we find the one? did we find the lay line? Maybe.

Of globalization. I mean, that's a big pet, you know, I mean, that's the, as Alex Jones gonna just rent tanker after tanker and cram them up to Suez Canal. I'm just kind of, I'm surprised that they, I haven't even read a full article on it. I just keep seeing little, you know, blows up. How could they not,

I'm puzzled, obviously it's more complicated than I think. But yeah, like how could they not, I'm puzzled. Obviously it's more complicated than a small bag thing. But yeah, like how do they not, is it just hung up on like a fucking sand bar or something? Or I mean, how is it, it seems like they, they tried togs, right? It seems like they jammed it into a, like it's, it's, the canal's not shaped like a you. It's not, it's shaped like a ladle. And it's all underwater. Oh, one side is one

side is there a shallow and it seems like the boat has just crammed crammed and a lot of it is in there. A lot of it is in there. So they'll probably have to unload it, but that's going to tip it over and fuck. Oh wow. Why don't they just dig around it? That's what I'm. Well, that's the first thing. Well, I read something about dicking canal around it. It's about dredging or something, but easy. Easy. Yeah. Oh, that's weird. So it's like one side is for, you know, ships with like deep, you know,

the, the, what is it, the draft? Yeah. Is that what they call the water line down to the, I have something like that. But whatever. Yeah. Some need to sit in a little more water than others. Yeah. Um, it's fantastic.

It's good to see. Good to see that we didn't learn anything. Yeah. It's fantastic. It's good to see. Good to see that we didn't learn anything. Yeah. I should've resolved jammed up again. Not no reason to fix anything about the global supply chain. Oh well, it's good for a laugh. How's the juice cleanse going?

I was a worse three days of my life. Yeah, okay. Well, last week it actually took 10 years. It's probably why I got the cancer in my throat. Maybe two days. Two strawberries. It's probably why I got the cancer. And my throat, maybe too many strawberries. It's strawberries are known HPV carriers. First of all, they go down on each other all the time. Can you believe that?

No, gay asshole. I can't believe it. Fucking doctor, fucking doctor Lisbo. Is that homophobic? Oh, you probably got it going down on your girlfriend. I'm like, bud, you're not, I mean, you're not fucking disappointing any stereotypes right now immediately throwing pussy licking into my face. I could have kids here, Doc.

Yeah. Talking about going down on my very odd thing to, first of all, I haven't in years. Secondly, just joking. When we were done last week, I walked out, you know, I've fallen you up the stairs, I think, and you said, some of the, God, I'm starving. I said, how long have you been doing it, you know, the juice plants? 80s girls says, we start tomorrow. So worse fucking, as in like, you're like, I'm never gonna make it because I'm so hungry right now and I can eat food. Bro, worst three days of my fucking, just dumb. Completely dumb to do.

And I worked out, I kept my normal workout schedule. I actually kept my workout schedule just so I could drink, just so I could drink a protein shake after I worked out. Got it. Which is more, which has more stuff in it than all the juices could mine. Yeah, well, it'll it'll it'll fill you up better than I felt like I was I felt like I was as ambie I was living in a days. Uh, both of us I think it it definitely took years off of our lives.

Wow. It was horrible. It came down to the last day and I said, honey, he's got a lot of lasted longer. I would say I did better actually. No, because I have more resolve. Really? Yes. And I like, because I like depriving myself of things, Jerry.

Oh, okay. Yeah, and then I got shit. Is it different juices? Like, is it like a thing you order and... Yeah, you order it. These are new juices. Gotcha. Most of them taste like crap.

There's like a beat one that just supposed to burn your, it's like, they asshole burner. It goes written on it. And it has a beat one that just supposed to burn your, it's like they asshole burner. It does written on it. And it has a little picture of an asterisk blowing fire out of it. They play Johnny Cash's Ring of Fire. Yeah, when you open the cap, because I step, you step, dude.

What was I gonna say? Oh, okay, so the juice cleanse said, you could have cucumber slices and almonds. I didn't wanna eat almonds. I'm like, I could have cucumber slices and almonds. I didn't want to eat almonds. I'm like, I could eat a whole bag of almonds and that's just gonna defeat the whole purpose of multiple things. They mean like a handful of almonds at that.

To say it, head and toe. It just said slices of cucumber. So I went to the store and just bought a bunch of cucumbers and I was eating those. Cause they're like 96% water or something. And I got shit for that. Yeah. I'm like, bitch, I'm fucking, I'm twice your size. I'm following the, I said slices,

I'm slicing them with my teeth. Into slices that I'm eating. None of this is verboten from the juice cleanse. I mean, you don't really pay attention to verbiage and see where the loopholes lie. I think I only lost like three pounds to him. Really? Maybe less.

Well, let me see what these guys are saying. I'm keeping my eye on the chat to see if Ralph shows up. I know B, formerly Digi released a video this morning of Ralph having an altercation with Riley at the B slash, at the Digi slash B. I think we just call her Digi B? Because I have to say didgy. Why? I tried to. No, I tried to.

And that was not that's not the turn. That's not a slash B. Yeah. I don't want to be disrespectful. But at the same time, I have to convey. I think it's, I mean, it's supposed to be B now. It's a, it's a, the, the, the, the, the golden witch.

Um, um, did you see that the US government is making a, is making a bunch of burritos at the border? I did not. You didn't see this? They're me. Yeah. Let me see. They're making burritos at the border.

They're making burritos at the border. Yeah, look at this, Sean. Look at this picture of all these burritos. Giant burritos at the border that they're making. See all these burritos? They've got them in a giant oven. Who's making the burritos? The border that they're making. See all these burritos? They've got them in a giant oven. Who's making the burritos? The US government.

Look, they're making all the, all the, see all these burritos? Those are burritos. They're in a giant oven. See this woman's covering it. They're wrapped in foil. Those can't be burritos. What's going on over here?

They're children. Oh, they're, they're cooking up children. Yeah, they're cooking children. Oh, shit, I don't, bitch, I don't fucking care about your take on it. See, look at this. Are these dead people? No, they're children.

They're at the border. The concentration camp of kids at the border. I can't see what the border, I can't see in there. Let me try to find you a better picture. Kids at the border. They're wrapped in burrito coverings. Are those those, those like a first aid blanket type things? Yeah. Yeah. Now Republicans are pretending to throw a fit about it.

Hmm. You see that they're making a bunch of burritos or they're or they've captured an army of magnetos at the border. I don't know what's more dangerous. Exactly. I mean the burritos and burritos in the wrong hands. I mean, that could, uh, you could have the kind of fart that could end a marriage. Yeah. Where does anyone have any pictures of the burritos at the border that you could set me to? I just can't. I honestly can't think of anything but the Riley versus Ralph. Maybe we should spend some time on that. Let me see. Well, if Ralph shows up, I want to talk to him about it. Both of them have said they're in for a fight for an actual MMA match. Did they actually not fight already?

Bro, do you want to watch the video right now? Well, do what's best for the show? Because wait, I'm going to wait. Yeah, because I will say, yeah, Ralph time it will be better if we do what you think for the show, because you're better at the show than I am. Thank you. Did you know? There was a bunch of shootings this week.

Yeah, there was. It was a fun gun week. A fun, pretty fast. I was done. The thing about the juice cleanse is, it felt like no time, like I felt like I didn't even have a life. Like I was just looking forward to sleep

so I could get through it. Man, I believe that. So I felt like the week was like today. Eating is like one of the few pleasures that like you can still, you know, you can still do, even if you can't go places, you know, you can at least order or go to the curb or do whatever. Like because I value eating right more now

than I ever have. Same. And it really gives you, I'm looking forward to that shit. It really gives you an insight into the female mind starving yourself and living only on juice for three days because you are irritable. You're not fun or funny. You don't want to do any work.

You just want to lie around and eat bond bonds. You are can't can't can't anchor us. You're not getting fit in any way that is acceptable. You're just start like they starve themselves. No losing weight and getting fit are two different things. Two different things. It gives you, if you want to know why they do what they do, just starve, live only on juice.

And you will get a very good understanding of why they're so theoretical. Yeah, you'll understand. No, not empathetic, because they're choosing to do this. Yeah, you'll just go, like, yeah, true, you'd go dumb. I hate them more.

That's funny. Here's something I found though. Here's some shooting related things that I found. Remember the, do you remember the Orlando nightclub shooter? All shooter? Yeah, a few years ago. Yeah, he didn't search for any, he only searched for nightclub on his all shooter. Yeah, a few years ago. Yeah, he didn't search for any, he only searched for nightclub on his phone, not gay, anything.

Oh, I didn't, yeah, I didn't know. I found that out. I didn't know. So it could have been a straight nightclub. Wasn't even homophobia related anyway. Thought that was interesting. But I didn't know that. Mm-hmm.

Let's see what I also got here. Game, game grumps guy outed for being straight. Oh my God. Let's see here. Another guy outed for being straight. And having sex with a 22-year-old woman, basically a petafile. if you're having sex with somebody who can't rent a car, that is, that is. Man, pedophilia 101. I don't ever groom me. Like grooming. Look, I don't ever want a fucking see that word used unless it's used with a minor. Like that's the, if, buy the fucking life, embrace it. You know, You cannot groom a 22 year old you can you can only groom a 22 year old That's the only way to interact with them. There has to be a fucking line

That's the line. I'm fucking drawing guys are so upset you are so obsessed with your lines that you forgot to have fun That's what matters totally true true. All men are grooming all women. The military. Yeah, but just hilarious. But the same military overrun by wokeness. The term like grooming. The term grooming historically has always meant whether it's sexual or not.

It's always meant with the might, you know, he was groomed to be, you know, like king or, you know, like whatever. Oh, it's like, this is in news week two, another game grumps, a game grumps out in room to be like king or whatever. This is in Newsweek too, another game grumps. A game grumps outed for talking to a 22-year-old. It hasn't, since come to Newsweek's attention that the screenshots do not provide evidence that sexual conversations happened while the victim was under age.

It wasn't until they were aged, they were aged 22. What is that like a moby dick line? It wasn't until they were aged 22 that the alleged sexual activity happened. Well, I think that's correct though. I think it sounds weird. Yeah. I don't know if any of this is funny. Well, it was one.

So there's, are they saying, oh Ralph is in the chat? All right, let's, let's talk to him. The 22 year old. The 22 year old. All right, Mr. Ralph, you are here. Dick, what's up, brother? How's it going? Ah, it's great. You've never failed to entertain us.

What is this new, this new, this new spectacle that you've put together is really something. Yeah, you know, I thought we wanted to give them the original production, you know, not something, not any derivatives here. We wanted to go, we wanted to go, what, Buster style? Yes. And yeah. So did you or B has released a Fight video and a breakdown of the fight. Should we watch it here and do you want to give your response to yeah?

Obviously anyone involved is invited to call in but I figured it's I figured you'd want to give a response to it Tell the story basically, Okay, we don't probably hear though. So Thursday I went to Virginia Beach. Okay. On three hours sleep. Okay. With me, who is Pansley party. Okay. Did you grow, Zach? And my current girlfriend. And so I went to Virginia Beach because she was there to testify against a dude who broke into their house and tried to kidnap her. Oh, yeah, actually. I couldn't just go to Virginia Beach.

I don't know, there was a whole house full of people there, all those same people that you saw on the video last night and they did absolutely nothing. They were complete cowards and did like literally not jack shit. Okay. So anyway, they ended up, and start contrast to what you saw last night. They were way far enough for me being there, but for, you know, actually, in that they're fucking girlfriend, you know, out of their bedroom, nobody gave a fuck about that.

Certainly the other three loaders, you know, they didn't give a fuck. Probably a pan in the ass. Yeah. So yeah so maybe. Sorry, anyway, I was there for once on the right side of the law, just, you know, supporting cars. Let's be where that gets you. I was actually at witness services, all backstage, you know, backstage, they were

treated me with respect. It was a stark contrast, I have to say, but anyway, so I'm sitting in the courtroom half asleep, dude, because I had three hours sleep, you know, I just had to kill stream the night before. And so I'm sitting there. Mint salad comes in. She's there to testify. And she does her part. It's probably the most I've ever heard her say.

I didn't realize she had that high brain power, actually. No, boy, she was, I don't know, with automatism, a small child. She'd fight her own ship. But then she did it. She did it her part in court, fair enough, not because she wanted to because they subpoenaed her by the way. But whatever. So here is Jennifer Sean.

Here is a picture of mid fight. No. Riley and Ralph fighting that I put on Twitter. We can watch that whole video in a moment. I just wanted to teach Sean hasn't seen anything of what's going on here, but please continue. So, so May got up, you know, Hers was the main testimony, obviously,

it was preliminary hearing. And she got up and pointed him out, you know, said her piece and everything. I hadn't even seen, did you, bro, I don't even know if he was there. Whatever. And so I forced my craftsman on the foot. And so, I was forced to my crass man, I'm gonna give a fuck.

So anyway, I sat there after she got done, you know, it was all over. They set the date and then we walked out. So I walk out, I'm still like in half a day is from no sleep and just being tired as fuck. I walk out and there's this fucking weirdo standing there and like some fucking purple dress. Like looking like he has cancer aids or some shit. I walk out and there's this fucking weirdo standing there and like some fucking purple dress

Like looking like he has cancer aids or some shit Registered to me that it's fucking did you wrote first and then finally a dog like oh Looking like a fucking freak circus freaks down there in front of me outside the courtroom So I just walk off to the side Because I'm like, you know, whatever. I'm not fucking this. We're in court like who cares? Like he'd set some shabby. But I'm like, whatever. I'm fucking just going to walk away. And so since we're already in Virginia Beach, May still had some stuff at the house. And she goes, Hey, could you guys just clear out for like an hour? So maybe you're on lunch. So so we could come back and get that stuff. And he goes, Yeah, that's cool. I'll do that, et cetera. Well, we go out, we're going to eat lunch.

And he calls back up and says, I don't want Ralph in my house. To the house, Ralph's gonna do this. What might he do in my house? First off, I'm not coming in your fucking house. I never wanted to come in your fucking house. I already came in your house once and took every single thing I wanted out of that bitch and left.

So I mean, like, I don't know it was ridiculous I mean technically last night did after they jumped me but whatever so They it devalues from their hands of blocking her whatever and yesterday. I'm sitting here I think I was recording a bonus episode or some shit. He sends a Pitch of all her shit out in the middle of the yard. Basically, and he's pointing a classic niche movie, brother. You know what? I didn't believe the gender transition. And so I saw that. And then I was like, well, maybe, I don't know. Maybe there's

something there. But so all her shit is out in the rain. And so I messaged him, like, I'm going to be at that house tonight. You know, this should still be there. Yeah. And so, so I go and, you know, let's watch, let's watch what happened at some point when you got that I have, I think I have it cute up. Yeah, what I want to get my part out here. Okay, go ahead. So, so I do the sunset and then I go, it's like, I don't know, 130 or so, there's real late. We just go out there and we're putting the stuff in the car. Fucking Riley's sped ass to stand there with a camera. I guess like filming me outside the window. Yeah. And I don't know what he's saying. I can't really hear him. But I was like,

fuck you bitch, basically come out here, come out here. So he opens the door and starts saying, I'm five one, which actually he's five one. That's good. Next to this. Like a little. He did. He's so fucking tiny. If we actually do this fight in the cage, I'm going to punish him, Dick. I am going to take him to school and fucking absolutely beat the fuck out of the show.

There is. You are down for this fight. You're serious about this fight. You're sitting in, dude. Like no money needed. I don't give a fuck. I'll pay my own way. I don't give a mother fuck. I'll make plenty of money off this shit regardless. I don't need any type of stipend, any type of fucking purse, not a goddamn thing. I'm ready to go now. What kind of fight would you want to do? Yeah. Well, I mean, I'm thinking it might as will be with Tim Lloyd MMA. MMA. Okay.

MMA or boxing. I don't know if is Riley is right. Somebody find Riley so we can get his commentary after that. I want to see if he's down for a fight because this is the fight that we'll see in a moment, John. It's very interesting. Ralph gets hit first, cold cock. Yeah.

Ralph delivers a cold cock of his own later, but there at no point is there room for an actual fight. Then Ralph, it's, it's ganged up on like three on one. Um, yeah. It's not. I, it's a, it's a, it's a job. They tried to job me basically. Um, and he fucking sucker punches me right at the beginning. So I walk up to the door when he's talking on the shit, he opens the door. Uh huh. The door is open by. Yeah. So the, my clothes this whole time. Yeah. The doors open. He's standing there yelling out talking shit after he'd already been talking shit before.

So I walk right up to the fucking, I walk right up to the door, you know me, dick. I don't give a fuck, I put a Frank Castle. Walked right up to his fucking door. It's talking shit, he's tiny dude. By the way, he can't say in all that shit. As I'm getting closer and closer, I'm like I'm thinking of some type of illusion.

Certainly he's gonna gain an answer to something as I get closer, but, no, he just kept getting more and more to the way the way it is going to be the most exciting part of this fight. So we can see exactly who is out tall. Go ahead. Go ahead taller than this motherfucker. At least not even a joke. And so I'm standing there. I'm like, okay, yeah, whatever you're not going to do shit. And so he turns around, this is my fault, by the way. This is completely my fault because I should have been on guard for this.

But he turns around and then like, I'm not, I don't really have my guard up, I'm not paying attention as much, but he turns around and then like stuck or punched me in the face. Okay, let's watch it. Let's watch it. That's a good part to watch it on, right?

Let's watch a little bit of it. I'm at nine something on the YGG studio video that B, did G's B put up this morning. Here, I'm gonna play, I might skip around a lot of this, isn't it, but I think this is what's beginning. Give it a circus freaks of view. I'll just listen to it through yours and just take your word for it.

Is there another copy? I really don't wanna give these, I don't wanna contribute to mental illness. I don't have anything, I don't have anything. I only have this one. Here we go. I'll make an exception for you. I'll thank you. Here we go. I bet you shut that fucking door. Here's Ralph approaching the door, open door. Finally, the punch drunk planet plows through the door and shoves his fat rolls against Riley. Okay. Technically, this is not a breaking and entering, but a forced entry.

And it is swiftly followed with a forced exit. I'm really good. And then was that the punch? Was that the first punch? You were probably the right home, you bitch. Sean, did you see that? Oh, there's another punch. It looked more like a left push.

Like here is okay, let's see. Technically this is not a- There's Ralph standing in the doorway. Here comes. This is what's been followed with a forced exit. Ralph's, oh, that's a sucker punch. Yeah, no, that is not. Ralph standing in the doorway. Here comes. Followed with a forced exit. Ralph's. Oh, that's a sucker punch. Yeah, no, it's a sucker punch.

Yeah, it was like, yeah, it was weird. It was looked like a Santa sucker. Like, I mean, there's just no debate about that. Really. I mean, no, I'm saying total sucker punch. I'm like, just out there. They're like, oh, we're calling these. Oh, we're doing this.

We're doing that. Just bitch made type shit literally. Trying to like say that I came in their house, which I absolutely didn't. I'm standing in the doorway. Well, later on when I'm like getting attacked, I think I do take a step in. I mean, I'm not a lawyer, but I think if you're screaming about who's, I think if you're screaming about who is five one back and forth in the yard, that's probably exactly not. They're trying to make it yard, that's probably exactly. Exactly.

There's no way. They're trying to make it legal because that's the type of bitches they are. Literally started all this shit. Put her shit out in the yard. Fucking sucker punched me. Try to jump me and they're trying to make it legal because that's the type of bitches. But it was that my only statement is that like it wasn't a very good sucker punch. I don't know, Sean.

Look at this. Look at this. Look at this punch. Yeah, look like they messed with the speed. Like, or something. They didn't do that. I have a slow-mo version of that. Let me find that real quick. I'm gonna show this slow-mo punch version.

Here's the initial sucker. But yeah, no doubt. That's a sucker punch. Somebody posted this in the chat. Yes, it was slow and then slow-mo version. Let's see here. Here is Ralph with his hands down, which is no, I mean, absolutely,

you wouldn't have your hands down. Yeah, that's right. Look, dude, I deserve to get clogged with a sucker punch for having my hands down like that. That's why I was mad at myself. And then later on when I give him a sucker punch, I was mad that didn't kick him in the face because I was actually late in my-

Okay, we're gonna watch it it in slow mo. Sean. Oh, that's a hell of a punch. Yeah. I mean, he was walking forward too. Yeah. He was walking forward. Um, Ralph, if you guys do have this fight, both of you have to learn how to throw punches and get in some serious. Yeah, that's true. Uh, I, uh, normally I think I would have thrown a better punch, but he just caught me off guard. Yeah, and it's just, well, at that point, so when that's another thing,

so normally I would have tried to take him to the ground, what it took him to the ground, little bitch. But it's like, you know, when there's three or four other people around, you don't take it to the ground because then they can just jump you more easily, right? Yeah. Yeah. Here is, is that name?

I'm about to tackle this bitch and beat the fuck out of him, but then I was like, nah, I can't do that. And I had sandals on, that was another retarded thing. I was like, nah, nothing will happen. I don't do my shoes. I have my combat crocks on. Thank you guys are wrestling now. I wish I could say that was the first time I got in a fight in Sandals, but there's a reason

I had that thought. Because that's how I, and it's roadway out there barefoot. Oh, man. All right. Mint is now taking several swings at you. Jesus. Oh, no, no, no. Maybe it's a hitting or I didn't hit it. I think he's got the fucking sound foam on the walls there. Yeah. He was hitting me. I didn't even put a finger on her.

They were trying to set me up on some shit. I think God that you didn't. You can't hit a woman no matter what. You can't. Cameras are rolling too. They don't love to have that. So thankfully, I was able to retain some composure there. Okay. And actually, I'm surprised you were that composed. Yeah. I don't know.

That's another thing. These points to the weakest fuck Sean. Like, I got it. I mean, I don't even know. That's what a 20 blood like literally didn't do shit. I mean, these motherfuckers, I don't know what, I don't know what they spend their day doing, checking off to pedophile shit or what, but like it's, they need to have my little storms pretty big. I got the old, it's a ambient away lifting, but Jesus Christ, this was, this was a pathetic display. Literally, I should have been putting the hospital, you know, three or four on one, but I think bird then jumps in, jumps in and hits you a couple times towards the end. He can't be towards the end. That was another thing.

So did you the weirdo, you know, pet ball, uh, gets on there. I've been told this because I didn't watch it, but somebody I know watched it, uh, and said, oh, they're trying to portray it as bird, like beat you up or something. Bird didn't do shit. Bird just stood there looking like a bitch the whole time, even meant jump in and started throwing blows before that little pussy. Like, what the fuck? I don't know.

It's just fantasy land. I guess I shouldn't expect anymore from a guy who puts on a dress and says he's a woman to live in fantasy land. But, you know, I don't know. Riley, are you there? Let's get your response to this. And I want to know about this Knox I want to know about this Knoxville too, fight that might be happening.

Riley's busy. Yeah, he's busy. He said he'll be on next week, Dick. He's got things to do with you. No, no, no, no, no, no. What do you mean you're busy? He's busy, Dick, come on. He's a, you know, he's really important guy.

Oh, but you're commenting in there. You'll be here next week. What do you can't talk to or you punch a guy, you called cock a guy where you can't talk to him on the show? Oh, no, no, no. He's in the discord. Come back next week.

No, no, no, no, no. Come on, Riley, do it for the show. Riley, get in here. I told you he was a bitch, dude, like what the fuck? I mean, he's sucking pluses me, has three or four on one odds. Now he won't even get in the call. I mean, is there anything more bitch made than that? Literally, I don't know.

He's busy smoking weed. Dick, they were scared shitless, dude. There was blood running all over my face and I'm just sitting there cackling like the Joker. They fucking, they didn't even know what the fuck they had been off you trust me like they were fucking thank God I don't want to go to jail and they don't want to take it further. So I kept it legal but yeah they were oh my god. Riley you don't want to talk to the guy that you were just in a fist the cuffs match with it two in the morning. I'm shocked. I'm gonna give him a moment to think about

it. Stop posting those big walls of empty text in the chat. He's not in the call. Tell him to join. I'm going to give him a moment to think about it. Oh my God. I'm going to get in position, Riley. I don't really know, but that's between y'all guys. I'm here. I don't know It's probably what it'll do for the fight to I have no confidence to who'll actually sign up for this Yeah, you see another now show I have no confidence Well, cuz I want to whoop is ass anyway, and this will be a way for me to do it without going to jail

So I would absolutely love this But you know, I don't know. I can't speak for everyone. Of course. I'm just doing a fucking fight thing again anyway. And now I got a real reason to want to fight somebody. Well, it's already heat, man. Like this way, this is a, people would be into this. Oh yeah. I guess if Riley doesn't want to,

tell him to send Mint Saladin like he did last night. Hmm. Well, what should we give him? How much time should we give him, Sean, to show up? Well, what is he, what is there to think about? I mean, if you want to hit some, if you want to really destroy somebody, even to get in the call here, I mean, I would like to, I would like to hear from my own entertainment purposes.

I want to hear that's what I, you know, that's what I'm all about. But I guess he's, you know, I mean, I, I guess he's over it. I originally wasn't going to call in, but I talked so much shit in the discord. Well, yeah, and they saw me. And it's like, well, you know what, fuck it. I got to call in. I just felt like that would be a bitch move. Originally, I was talking about calling in next week too, but you know, no, that's crazy.

Here's the. Yeah. Well, all right, Riley, he doesn't, I'm going to give him another, another, he's not calling in next week. I'll, I'll tell you guys that right now. No, you're going to say no. I mean, what? Yeah, come on.

You're already said. No news. No one cares. And that's another reason I came on because just like by next week, they'll be so much. Yeah. It's like, who knows what's gonna have,

what boats will get stuck where next week? Did Riley leave? I'm gonna give him another minute. Well, it's very exciting, Ralph. Yeah. Is there more to the video? Is there more? Do we have the sucker punch or do we have the punch from Ralph?

The Ralph delivers a punch to Riley too. Yeah. You know what? I was standing there and like I just like my lip was bleeding and he had like bent over and I was like, fuck this. I started thinking about the sucker punch he gave me. Yeah. I just run and fucking in in the face.

Yeah. Here it is. I think there it is. I didn't land it clean. I didn't see it. I think it's coming. He's standing in the doorway. There it is.

There you go. Okay. Quite a leave. Quite a leave. That had that one looked like it had something behind it. Yeah. Quite a leave. Quite a leave. That had that one looked like it had something behind it. Yeah. I would say you probably threw the better punch. Let me see it again.

Okay. All right, Sean, just for you, I'll let you see it again. Well, he's got to take a big step lunge forward to get in there. Well, yeah. I mean, but that's momentum. There. Oh, my God. Yeah, that's. See, that's one of those punches that like it looks, it looks lumbering,

but George Foreman looked lumbering. He did. And he fucking, he knocked people's heads off. No, there was something behind that. All right, Riley, because he stepped into it. This is the last call. Oh, wow. I can't into it. This is the last call. Oh, wow. I can't believe it.

How serious can you be about a fight if you are not going to talk to the person? Oh, well, that's the internet folks. One disappointment after another. I did my part. Thank you for the comments on that punch. I thought I could have hit it a little bit better, but I was proud of it. That's a good punch. All thought I could have hit it a little bit better, but I was proud of it. That's a good punch. Yeah.

All right, Ralph, take it easy. Iced your hand. Let's put it this way. I didn't, I couldn't mistake that for like a left push. Oh, I'm glad I called in today. You gentlemen have a good show. Guys, if you're breaking up with your girlfriend, just mail her her stuff. That's, yeah, let her dick play a show. Later. Oh, shameful. I don't know what to say about Riley.

I guess people will make up their own minds about it. I invite everybody to end up in the same, oh, these fucking dickheads end up in the same place. Women. It's always women. Okay, what else do I have here? Taxing drivers by the mile shows a lot of promise. You know, that's a new, they found it out a new way to tax you by the mile this time.

They got to call it a fee so they don't have to vote on it. Oh, can they do that? Well, that's call it a fee. Yeah. Well, that's, yeah, that's how you pass things without having to vote on it, like in a state. Oh, okay. Yeah, you call it a fee. So you're going to have to pay a tax by every mile you drive now due to COVID and global

warming and various other things. Whatever. You have to pay a buck to the government for you. And if you didn't, if you didn't drive as much as your neighbors, this is for a certain state or they, this is a butt judge, Biden's travels are, yeah, whatever. So this is, I mean, I R S is federal.

Yeah, they're gonna charge you attacks for your driving. This, here's another one. The city of Oakland, let me find where this is. The city of Oakland is giving black people only $500. I think there's only black people in Oakland. Well, then you wouldn't think they need to specify. Would you? The mayor of Oakland announced a privately funded program that will give low income

families of color, $500 a month, with no rules on how they could spend it. So it's privately funded, but it's run by the city. That's what, yeah. So it's like they're just, they're just like the collection point. Is that announced a privately funded program? So program means like a government. You would think a government program. This program is on private donors experiment with a guaranteed income. An idea that gives poor people a set amount of money. Are we starting to see that when I said race based taxes are the future, it wasn't an exaggeration. Nothing I have said this entire time has been an exaggeration at all. We

are living in hell and it is getting worse every day. This is the beginning of it. This is the, this is the small, these are the steps to unleash a total raised based tax system, which will be rolled out the second the federal reserve has a cryptocurrency. Um, it's, it's, it's, it's remarkable. It's remarkable that white people just tolerate this. The absolutely, absolutely the biggest buses in the history of human, in human history are white people's tolerance of getting fucked over specifically in this way, without even, without saying anything, anything about it. They will let, white people will let you do anything they want.

They're like the, they're like the Labrador retrievers of people. They will let you do anything. They will just sit there and take it and take it and take it. They will never, they will never respond to it. Ever. They'll sit there and they'll, they'll forever. And they will never, they will never respond to it, ever. They'll sit there and they'll, they'll tell each other that eventually it'll be too much. White people will sit around and they'll cry to each other.

The men will, they say, well, better not push us too far. Well, they better not push us too far. And meanwhile, their government will roll out money, not for them, tax money, not private, private, whatever, whatever, well, we had all this money and we figured out, you know Fuck you guys Fuck you guys like the farmer bailouts and it's shocking to me Shocking to me that they tolerated what's so fucking like I'm sitting thinking and like I really don't care

Like it's a part no, it's funny Like I believe you when you say it like, you know, people sitting around going, yeah, you better not push too far better. I'm so far from that. Oh, yeah. I'm so apathetic to it. Like I don't like that doesn't raise my blood pressure one point. It's like they're giving people best of shit based on race. I'm just like, yeah, I'mocking. Yeah, I'm not even shocked. What would shock you? Well, no, I mean, a lot of things, a lot of things shocked me. But like that, I'm just like, oh, yeah,

it's kind of just seems like something that would be going on right now. It seems like something that would be... I think I've got in so many in a lot of ways, I've just kind of checked out. Yeah, like I... The hell was that a gun? Yeah, I know. kind of checked out. Yeah, like I, and I- The hell was that a gun? Yeah, I know.

And I think I'm, I think I'm happier for. Oh, Twitter misogyny mentions of slut and horror broken down by gender. That's not surprising. Male, tweeters, we're talking about slut and horror. 40% of the time it's talked about. 60% of the time, slut and horror being used, it's women tweeting about it. Yeah. I guess we found the root of all that misogyny, all that pesky misogyny that's going around. Well, because we found the perpetrators of it. Because who hates women more than women?

Yeah. Because they understand women. Well, yeah, they completely understand women. There's their hatred jealousy. Yeah, so it's not surprising to me. Whoops, whoops, better shut that down quickly before someone else gets blamed for it. Let's see what else we've got here. Negative, human penises are shrinking.

What do you think about that? Human penises. Really? Yeah, because of all the plastics. Dicks are shrinking. Human penises are shrinking because of pollution. Dr. Shauna Swann has found out that chemicals called foul flights are causing human babies to be

formed with malformed genitals. Oh no. Penises are shrinking and genitals are becoming malformed because of pollution. Humanity is facing an existential crisis in fertility race. Well, an environmental scientist. Oh, no. Swann. Babies are being born with small penises. It's not enough. It's not enough to take away all their money. They had to take away their dicks, too. Yeah. So they can't earn any money.

How small would, how small would penises have to go before anyone changed anything? I imagine even if babies were born just with no penises at all, that wouldn't be enough to move the needle. Hmm. What do you think? I don't know. I mean, I'm glad I'm not a baby. I'm glad I'm not a baby. I'm glad I'm not a baby.

Yeah. Um, let me see here. Biden says there's nothing. There's not a single thing a man can do that a woman can't do as well or better. Let's hear it. Excellent. Maybe you got confused and said,

and meant to say everything, well wait, there's no, let's hear it, maybe you got confused. You know, I've told my daughters, granddaughters from the time they would all not understand what I was saying And I mean it There's not a single thing a man can do that a woman can't do as well or better

Not a single thing a single thing I want to thought about that for longer than it took you to say it Naval Academy not a single Not one single thing. Yeah, it was laughable. What is laughable about that? What do you mean? That's the guy in charge. Well, I'm going to stop right there because I don't want to be canceled. So what I mean, well, it's, yeah, I mean, just, you know, here is how about, how about,

you know, dragging a 200 pound man out of a fucking No battle, I mean Can some women do it? Yeah, there's always some But it's like yeah, single thing You know like single thing you don't have to not Everything is fucking hyper ball at grandstanding like it's just Everything is fucking hyper ballac grandstanding like it's just There's just no like no nuance nuance is just fucking dead

Does somebody really talk to their granddaughter like that like that she need to be sat down I mean nothing that a you that a man can do that you can't not even you not like that. I mean There's a you know, I mean something to be said for just being mediocre and showing up. Showing up can get you a long way. Right. Riley. See you in there. He's not. He just left. Riley's fucking left. Oh, unvolved. Unbelievable. Oh my God. That's going to be the biggest, that will be one of the biggest losses of all time that he's a ducking being in the chat and ducking out of a fight. That's unlived, that's unlived downable, I think. Damn it. I mean, I just, that's just my prediction. Here is a veto posted. There's left a magic card. So this woman got fired from magic as an artist for being a turf.

Do you know what a turf is? I know that turf. I know that Vito, are you doing talk about this? Please come in. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. Well, how do we know that he's in the fucking check and see people in there? Vito.

I don't know. Vito cared enough to. You're all garbally Vito. Oh my God. Yeah. What's up? What's up? There you are. Hey, yeah. So you want to talk about Teresa Nielsen and getting fired from magic? Yeah, who is the really stupid story? Yeah, who is this woman? The turf? So Teresa Nielsen is a, she was

a magic artist for like, I'm over a decade. I want to say she's been with the game for, or was with the game forever. Yeah, I mean, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're sound. Hold on, your sound is all fucked up. Can you reconnect for a second? Sorry. Test one. There you go. There you go. Yeah. Yeah. That's better. Because I'm strong on my computer. Anyway. So Teresa Nielsen, she's an artist. She was with magic for like over a decade. She did some of the best art in the game. I mean, you're looking at it right now. I just post like a random picture of one of her artworks.

Yeah, but she got in trouble for a number of very stupid reasons, one of which was she's on Twitter and she was liking posts by guys like Ben Shapiro. Oh, I can't do that. A couple other ones. I don't know if you've seen what's happened with Magic of Gathering, but it's basically been taken over by the woke people who don't like that sort of thing. Well, it's, has it been taken over? Is it just like they're afraid of the bad PR?

Do they actually play the game or do they just bitch about it constantly online? It's been taken over. Have you seen the new plans Walker Nico, the first gender neutral plans Walker in the game. I did see that. Yeah. Yeah. Who has half her head shaved off in a goatee, which is pretty bad. Yeah. Yeah. The game has been taken over by a certain number of people, one of which is this magic champion. You know, she wins all the tournaments. It's a transgender M to female person named Autumn. Got mad at this Trees Nielsen artist.

A single thing has has who by the way is a lesbian, but this artist has said something like I don't know like different things on gender. So this magic pro actually actually went to a tournament and on all her cards she wrote wrote, to Reese Nielsen is a turf. Oh my God. On the cards to play in the tournament. I know that I have heard the term turf. It stands for sexy lady. No, it doesn't.

Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible.

Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. like old school hardcore feminists who are like, for a gender woman, you're not real women and you are not a part of our movement. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. And nobody really identifies using that word, it's pretty much a slur for women who question gender. They go, oh, you're a turf, you're one of those turf, you know. If you don't buy 100% of my concept, you're a bigot. Right. Yeah. If you think that me, you me, having no desire for childbirth or any of the other essential qualities

of womanhood kind of conflicts with whatever, then it's wrong with you. So yeah, basically it became this whole thing where half the magic community is going. This artist is a horrible turf monster because she said a couple things about gender and also she's an obvious conservative who likes Ben Shapiro and it was maybe dabbling in some QAnon related stuff but not in like a sinister way. It was just kind of like, yeah, I'm a crazy white lady. What are you gonna do? So they fired, they basically said, we don't want any more of your art and she's done some of the best art in the game. Like go look up to Reese Nielsen, just some fantastic artwork. Yeah.

And now they're bringing in all these weird experimental artists. Here's what they replaced this artist with. So they fired this one because she's a turf. Here's what they replaced it with. Wow. It's a pretty

kind of a radical lady in like a single color MS paint, weird Photoshop, like a, yeah, this looks really dumb. That's everybody does the look like Photoshop and the weird thing is that it's actually, like she painted that model. And you're like, well, why did you spend all that time doing it if it's gonna look like a shitty Photoshop?

Yeah, it does look like art. Is that a real person that's on the picture? No, that's like she took, she like has this artist makes these hyper-realistic looking people. She painted that. But it doesn't belong on that part. She had a bunch of weird clip art looking crap onto the bit.

It doesn't belong in the game at all. No, it doesn't fantasy game. It doesn't look composed. It's not composed. It's not, it's not, God, that fantasy game. It doesn't compose. It's not composed into the it's not. God. A Sam. That's awful. Can you go from an art standpoint? That's fucking atrocious. And there's guys. I went through the most the most painful part is reading

the guys who are like actually I dig this style like just fucking kill your skit. That'll add a here. Shut up with that. Actually, you know, I don't see believe this, but it's it's growing on me like people who defend blockers and shut up get out of here. It's really it's the chat right now because your chat's going, wait, that's not a joke, the art because that's been the thing. No, that's what it looks like. It looks like a joke on the main message board for a magic on Reddit. They had to add to the card reveal post like a big no sign.

I'm not a joke. I'm not a joke. Recording it to the admins. Please an actual card. Please stop saying this a joke. This is a joke when it's obviously very good and belongs in our, if enough people suck and enough people say it's a joke, it's a joke. It's a joke.

Yeah. Just say, oh, yeah, we sent the wrong one to the printer. We sent asked to the printer and we meant to send something good, which we are. I mean, we're working on, I mean, we're working on, it's already at the printer is what sucks. Like, I wish the community could be like, please replace, because here's the other problem. This is like one of the ultra premium cards, like the lucky cards that you only get one

in every 30 packs or whatever. Thank God, it's only one. You're gonna be like, well, yeah, but you're going to be like, so rare. I finally got a little school cards and you're going to go, oh, fuck, it's that one. Like, I'm going to be so mad if I pulled this out of a card pack. You're like, God, damn it. What is everything else to suck? The other one's way better. Yeah.

Everything has, I saw somebody say that works are obviously meant to be black people like some. Oh, that's been a whole. Well, what's the list of them? Dungeons and Dragons. And they actually had to because of that controversy that they said orcs are basically a race. But there is black people in, first of all, orcs are species. Secondly, there are black people in Dungeons and Dragons.

It's not that they were, if somebody said, what are they as far as a race? I definitely would not go black to white women. Orcs are supposed to represent white women. They stink. They're saying, I don't see any of the parallels. They're saying, I don't see any of the parallels. You to be racist when you watch something like Lord of the Rings and all the orcs are evil and you go, oh, just like some races in the real life. Nobody thinks that the argument.

Nobody thinks that. Nobody thinks that. Nobody thinks that. Nobody. Yeah. The KKK is not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions.

They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions.

They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. They're not having like weekly D&D sessions. evil, neutral good, lawful good. Yeah. It used to be that it said, you know, orcs are aligned as evil. Yeah. And they've taken out all the alignments based on species because you're like, no, no, not all orcs are evil because that's like saying all races can be evil. So they've gotten rid of all the alignments based on a creature class in Dungeons and Dragons now. God, I fucking, we need a war. I mean, I need a war.

We need a war so bad. It's gotten so ludicrous. Well, I hope we find Nazis on Mars or something. We can go fight. We can all bam together and go, yeah. Need a common enemy. I saw people flipping out about something called Six Days in Fallujah as well,

which I thought was interesting. So, the documentary? No, it was a video game. Six Days in Fallujah. Shooty up game. I don't know. But I started looking into that game. It is going to be very interesting. I thought it was interesting because they've realized that the boycotts don't work. Like they can't boycott a video game. Video game, people who actually buy it don't care. So now they have to go for the throw. They have to get you to actually stop making the thing that you're

making to stop it. They never lie on the consumer to vote with their pocket because the ones that buy, like you said, don't give a fuck. Yeah. Not to mention that every time they try to boycott these things, it basically just creates so much free press that they make more money. Yeah. It's like a small project. Yeah. If nobody had complained about this game, which is an Iraq war shooter, where they actually talked to veterans and kind of are trying to tell their stories of what went down in Iraq. It probably wouldn't have been a very big game. It's kind of a small like six man studio or whatever. But now that everyone's screaming, oh, you can't make this game. It's going to be imperialist war propaganda. Oh, no, here.

I want to call it the club. The club's funny. The imperialist war propaganda. Oh, no, here I want to quote the clothe. The clothe's funny. The demonized brown people. Now everybody's pre-ordering. This will also inevitably breed a new generation of mass shooters in America and brainwash. You're on the petition right now. And brainwash gamers into thinking, into thinking racism is okay. Yeah. into thinking true into thinking racism is okay.

Sean, it's gonna, it's gonna brainwash gamers into thinking that racism is okay. So stupid. So fucking stupid. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys.

Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. Breed a new generation of mess you guys. the picture that says six days to Fulusia where it says address to five. Oh, they actually did he change it? Oh, he actually changed it. I'm reading for you. So he used to be addressed to the United Nations, President Joe Biden, the Canadian government, the British government. Like this is literally them saying, we want the government to censor this Iraq war game.

Yeah. And it's been signed by all these game developers, game journalists are like, we want the government to censor our video games. We're about to war. It's going to censor the war. He climbed. Yeah. We're living in a nightmare. We're living in hell. There are groups that are completely just based in fantasy. We're living in hell. They're groups that are completely just based in fantasy. We're living in hell.

Wait, there was another one I wanted to talk to you about you. I like having the woke minute with Fido. Yeah, I should probably stop obsessing over all these things and digging into them as much as I do. Because I always have. It's interesting to me, though. I have a free angle of these nonsense. Well, like the game, it's because they're taking over video.

I used to work in the game industry. And that's a, that's a do. I. I used to work in the game industry. And that's a do. I have to do shadow work in the game industry. Yeah. I don't know if I can line this up on the show, but like, you know, I recently helped a major studio set up their live streaming setup. And they're like, oh, I'm going to go out of that. I'm like, don't.

Yeah. At all. Yeah. Don't tell anyone I was here for your sake and mine. Yeah. Because these people will just go, you let Vito set up your live stream. Don't you know that guy makes hateful Star Wars videos or whatever else? That's so crazy.

I've got products and I'm like, please take my name out of the credits. Like erase me from all of this. I am a shadow in the night because the game industry, it is, I tried to be a game journalist for years. It's a social society. It's a social life. It's a whatever else. And I just realized, the only way to work in this I tried to be a game journalist for years. It's a social society. It's a social society. And I just realized, the only way to work in this industry is to shut your mouth. Yeah.

Yeah. Either that or have the perfect politics, which I obviously don't have. Vito, can you just say they're taking our jobs? They're taking our jobs. Yeah, that's the point, right? That's what you're driving at. I mean, it's wild. There have, they, decided their industry

is not for guys like me. So then we go and start YouTube and they get really mad because we get more hits than they're doing. What does that even mean? Guys like Vito. Just frankly, you just have like, to me who just have like, to me like, reasonable opinions who don't think

orcs are black people. Yeah, I get out of here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't understand. I was literally, when I was in a game journalism, the game industry, are black people. Yeah, I get out of here. Yeah, I understand. I was literally when I was in a game journalism, the game industry, I had people tell me, you know, you're, you're the, you're the closest thing to a Trump supporter friend that I have. What do you like? What do you like? Not at all. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like, you're like a horrible liberal, like douchebag. And they're like, no, you're

kind of like far right by my metric. You're the farthest right. I had somebody literally tell me this like a pretty prominent game developer who now will not talk to me at all. Oh my god. You're the farthest right friend I have. And I'm like, dude, I voted for the same president as you. You have. Yeah. Shocking. I actually think that I'm liberal. I said, and in some things you are, I mean, in most things, a lot of things. I think think that I'm liberal. And in some things you are. I mean, in most things, a lot of things. I think if it, if the liberals weren't so insane, I would, Trump was fucking liberal.

Like this is the, yeah, this is the reality of the political spectrum as it liberals used to be anti-immigration. Like all of his stances, opening up Medicare, like all of his, all of his actual stances and believes align more with, with traditional liberalism, I think, than traditional conservatism. Well, conservatism, conservatism. I have to curb it down.

Yeah. Hold on, I have a, I have one for changing attitudes on immigration. Let me pull it up. Immigration stands on the ground. The needle has just been pushed so dramatically. Yeah. Less than 20 years ago. Hold on, Vita, less than 20 years ago, liberals were more than three times as likely to say immigration to the US should be decreased as they were to say it should be increased. I think something about that is likely to say the opposite.

You can see it on the graph. Yeah. There's been some immigration has totally flipped. It's become, well, it's become completely politicized and not like thought of as, you know, the economic implications at all anymore. No, that's absolutely. I've read similar articles to that where it definitely, the stance has changed as things have become hyper politicized. Yeah. It's just a racial issue, they think. Yeah. Right. Well, that's right. It's nothing about the economics.

It's either you hate brown people, you don't. I think there's more going on here, man. Yeah. No, that's right. That's right. Well, subtlety and nuance is off the table. Vita, are you, did you hear about human penises shrinking? That mean the good news is actually I have read a little bit about the imagine.

And the counts are down as well, I believe. In 18 years, thank God. These young ladies are going to want to see some big old guy penises. These guys, these young guys, I thought they would compete with our non-shunken penises. Exactly. This is good news for us. Right. Take that you little fox. You little part is that the industries

that make these plastics have been fighting whoever this researcher is and you're like, don't you guys want? Well, they have big penises. Like, wouldn't you want? They found their own studies. Yeah. Yeah. Come on. This is the human race, baby. I know your Tupperware containers got to sell, but we want our American boys to have big old wangs. Right. Yeah. So we don't have to fight more wars. All right, V. Dad, do you got anything else? Thank you for calling in. Uh, nothing, nothing too exciting. And me and Andy Signore are working on a new show. It should be fun. You guys should uh, Oh, cool. Check that out. And always come by YouTube.com slash you know, always have a fun. All right. See you buddy. See ya. Have you see you?

Oh, I can't I'm so disappointed that Riley didn't call in me too. That's so sad. I need a coke me too I don't know if we have any actually really yeah my bad honey. Do we have any coax? My cancer is really kicking in really yeah That's unfortunate. I know. I got John Del Ross. Here's well. Let me read some comments.

Oh, wait, here's a burlesque. I mean, John, like, of the rice? It does mean John of the rice. Yeah. Falling in. Best selling comic. Best selling comic. Um, burlesque.

John, I don't know if you were looking forward to burlesco opening back up. Sure. Why not? Well, I don't. If you were, I don't like you to take a gander at this beautiful picture that the New York Times has posted. God damn you. This is the New York Times, all right?

Did you say you were excited about burles coming back? I mean, I said, all right. Oh, did you say you were excited about burlesque coming back? I mean, I said, I said not just sarcastically. After a year lockdown, the New York City's burlesque performers are itching to wear their feathers, lingerie and harnesses again. Here is what looks like Mike's to slouska from Red Letter Media, and as some sort of a harness, a jock strap, posing erotically, hugging a red velvet curtain. It's one of, it's easily,

it's one of the more disturbing things I've seen when it comes to, uh, that's a regular woman. I don't know if I can show these. No, not regular. Not regular. Yeah. There's nothing regular about that face.'t know if I could show these. Not regular. Nothing regular about that face. This is what they're leading with. Yeah.

This is the butt, the butt of burlesque. This is the butt, the face of burlesque, but a butt. Who can tell the difference? Get a mouthful of that. Good God. What the fuck is wrong with the people? Okay. Okay. Amazon drivers pooping in bags.

Oh, because like nobody's bathrooms are open. Like you stop at a gas station or something if you really got a... Yeah, here was the... Let me read the thing. Amazon workers managing a bottle. Knows that it's workers, urinating bottles, and even defecating bags. Yeah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Let me find the,

we should supply them with like a bedpan. Maybe like a toilet. Yeah. If you're delivering packages all day, what are you supposed to do? Yeah. Well, what do you wear in a gas station? Well, because that's closed.

That's what I mean. So what do they do, though? Well, they should in bags, apparently. No. I mean, but I'm trying to think what Amazon could do about it. I think it could give him a bucket at least. Amazon bucket. Yeah, exactly.

I love the way they phrase this one. Hello, this was leaked from Amazon. Hello, this evening in associate discovered human feces in an Amazon bag that was returned to the station by a driver. This is the third occasion in the last two months when bags have been returned to station with poop inside. Feces, please. We understand that DAs, is that delivery associates?

You think? Probably. May have emergencies while on road. And especially during COVID, DAs have struggled to find bathrooms while delivering. I mean, Amazon could make a deal with every gas station in the country. Why are they, where? It says we're going to give you money to use your gas to use your toilets.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what a human being would do. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, it's a gas state. We're just going to give them a token, like an Amazon token, and then they can redeem them for money from us. We've noticed an uptick recently in all kinds of unsanitary,

oh yeah, well, regardless, DAs cannot and must not return bags to station with poop inside. What if that's the problem? So they're, yeah, I know. That's what I was just going to say. So what, they're Amazon bags and like they're shitting in their car and then what they're, they're taking the bag inside to like their depot or whatever and leaving it. Am I forgetting to throw it out the window on the way back to the station? Do they, they drive, they try the Amazon vehicles? Yeah, right?

Yeah, that's what I thought. So they're like sprinter bands. Yeah, they're all the vans, huh? But the problem is we've identified the problem. It's that poop is being returned. Right, so stop. Yeah. Throw it on the side of the, no direction of what to do with the poop,

I know. Which is just medical ways. Just don't, just don't return the pee-ass with a fucking bag of shit inside. God, man. Okay, some comments. Masculine marsupial. Dick, I don't want drag queens around kids and have no problems admitting that. And the fact that you don't see the problem with having people who base their whole fucking

identity on advertising their sexual deviancy around kids means that living in Southern California has rotted your brain. Wow. I don't know how many kids were saved with that post, but... Well, I hope that me reading it saved more. Right, then there you go. Livelihood, Dr. Rock, dear Dick, I'll tell you what makes me a rage. Every time I hear the word, livelihood, I must repeat it to myself in your Maddoxian voice.

I know. Me too. I know. There's a few things like that. Oh my God, dammit. If I'm alone in my car or something, I'll do this out loud several times. If I'm in livelihood.

If I'm with company, I'll just do it in my head, but I must do it. Me too. I know. I'm fairly certain I'll be doing this for the rest of my fucking life thanks, Dr. Rock. PS-Shango, fuck yourself. Let's see. Michael A. that bowling advice league is no joke.

A work as a bartender in a bowling alley. Every fucking weirdo who walks in off the street that gets involved in a bowling league gets smoothed out inside of six months. Did I tell some weirdo? I think I told some weirdo to join a bowling league. Yeah, except for one habitual weirdo. Road rage Seattle as soon as possible,

I can't afford flights everywhere. I'd like to go to Seattle. That'd be nice. I always heard it's a nice city. It is. It is. You've been. I have. I have. I have. A lot of people I know have moved there.

Now I say it's like, or lived there in the past and then had to move for other reasons. A lot of them say that's like, yep, that's my favorite city to live in. Yeah. And I wouldn't mind the weather. Chris, primer with hand-rolled cigarettes. I heard unfiltered cigarettes are less dangerous than the filtered ones because you can't draw the smoke in as deep into your lungs. The loose tobacco is objectively superior to their pre-rolled counterparts.

I've never really enjoyed a cigarette until I tried a bag of European tobacco. I thought the Biden interview looked weird. I saw the feed from a few sources and some of them look even more fun. No, it's not, it's just a fucking interview. It's just a microphone. Maddox wouldn't like our boy, Patty C. Cups. Although Maddox shares a lack of taste with Patrick,

Maddox has a California smugness that comes from too much hummus and fresh fruit that trailer park midwesterners don't have. Well, he's definitely smug. He's definitely smug. Patrick would also remind him of those weirdoes in Utah he wanted to escape. I think he's right on that.

I want to pay to find out. I'm gonna be like running, running from himself. That's where the money's at. No, I don't give a fuck about stuttering, John. Okay, let me get John in here. John Delarossa, are you there? You might be muted on your side. What's going on, guys?

Hey, how are you? Hello, how are you? I just wanted to say that Vito is the most right-wing person I know and he radicalized me. Well, so. I feel so bad for Vito because he doesn't get any love from any of the right. Like everyone, so many people on the right just aggressively hate him because it's political. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah, I see it on Twitter all the time. A bunch of my friends go out to him and I'm just like, why Vito is nice. Yeah, he's fine. I like Vito. It's so important that Vito has different political opinions. They fucking gave him diversity and inclusivity or something. Yes. Yes.

You are a leading Hispanic voice in science fiction, a best-selling author. Oh, wow. We have bad luck. How often do you mention that you're best-selling? You're not gonna sue Dick, are you? I try to do it as much as I can. Sue Dick? Because I like getting the to do it as much as I can. Sue Dick?

Because, you know, I like getting the number one status makes me happy. Yeah. And you, excuse me, you're the creator of what exactly? Go over your credentials for everyone. Let's see, my biggest books to date are my Von Monaco series. It's a steam punk thing. And so I just became the king of that niche in books. And the first book's called for steaming country.

If you're into that, it's kind of like a positive nationalistic fantasy world. And right now I've got Deus Volt on Indiegogo. It's a fantasy comic. It's kind of like the old Conan the Barbarian stuff, but with a crusader instead of a barbarian. So you're in with the alt-right pretty deep with books like Deus Vault. Oh, geez. I didn't say that. Yeah, but you are. I mean, that's the reality of touching

any of these topics that you are, right? I am friends with Fox Day. I'll put it that way. Okay. How long have you been in comics? Let's see, I started my first comic like in 2010, but I didn't get big till about 2018. I got attacked by bleeding cool. Are you guys familiar with them? I remember them, but please explain it to Sean. It's all gonna be news to me.

So, free to, or my book. I'll make gossip slash news website. And the one thing that the right and left can agree on, that Rich Johnston, the perfeer of that site is just a frickin' scumbag. He's an absolute awful person. But I made this article on my website, which was just listing off everybody who's working

for Marvel Comics at the time. And every single one of them was like anti-Trump, anti-Christian, anti-conservative. There wasn't even one writer who worked for the company who was silent. And I'm just like, okay, this is out of control. And I was like, hey, if you guys want real diversity or whatever, hire me.

Yeah. And he picked up my blog. I was a nobody at the time. And he just ran with it, titling it, how not to get a job at Marvel Comics and just started dunking on me. And... Oh.

Did you have a death threats? It was fucking crazy. I was a nobody, but it made me big, so it worked out. Yeah. What was the advice on how not to? Like what was it just making you want to be him? Yeah, yeah, be him, right? But he doesn't work for Marvel Comics either, they hate him.

So, but yeah, he was just going off on just like, you know, if you're gonna apply for a job, you probably shouldn't, probably shouldn't dunk on the company like this. And I'm just like, I don't actually want to work for one of these corporate shill outfits. Crazy. What's the deal with comics? Why is it so, why is it so up its own? I don't know. I don't know. I'm an obnoxious people are in there and it's so fucking woke. Well comics, I guess it's become that way, but I mean, I don't know. Comics are a completely alien world to me.

Yeah, me too, kind of. I've never read a comic book. I don't. I mean, I see the movies. And the only reason I see the movies is because from what I do now, we do a lot of superhero animated shit. I didn't know anything about that stuff, except for the big main guys. I had never heard of probably three quarters didn't know anything about that stuff, except for like, you know, the big main guys.

I had never heard of probably three quarters of some of these, you know, these characters that are in these, you know, DC animated films or shit like that. So it's like, that's the only reason I know anything about it. Yeah. All the movies are spiraling too. I mean, we're about to get like woman Thor, right? Which nobody wants.

And then we're also like on a thing where we are like getting this like Falcon and Captain America thing. Did some random scene where like these white cops in Baltimore and by the way, there's no white cops in Baltimore at all. Show up and just harass the Falcon just because he's there and they're just like, oh, sorry,

I didn't recognize you outside of your uniform. It's like, are you freaking serious? Oh, man. Just face me on to puke. Yeah, it wasn't there like a little bit of Captain America too. He's gay now, Captain America. Did I see that I read that? Oh yeah, they just want to get Captain America

in the comics. They're doing a whole Pride month thing for both. They're even labeling them like Marvel Pride. It's super cringey. Why did it get picked up in comics so much? Like how did it get, how did comics specifically get so overwhelmed with, they've got,

they don't care about the comics at these studios. So Disney just bought these for the movie properties, right? So the comics aren't really making money anyway. And so they just cycle through like the lowest cost talent they possibly can get. And eventually they get their friends in there, they get another friend in there. And then suddenly you've just got all these talentless hacks

who are just in there trying to talk about their training for end or whatever. But comic book characters have only recently come, especially the most recently, to main mainstream, right? Like to people who are like who, well, like people who never grew up reading comic books or knowing the back stories or anything, they go see the movies, right? And then they see the opposite. The ex-men used to sell millions of copies, millions. Yeah, yeah, but I mean, but a lot more people are seeing the movies. Well, yeah, you know what I'm saying?

This is worldwide because this worldwide. Yeah, right. Oh, of course. Yeah. Yeah. But back in the day, I mean, this, this was our like cultural Americana and they just tanked it. They tanked all their goodwill.

There's been a lot of reasons for that. They really did. Isn't that like the whole point of X-Men? Isn't that like a commentary on like racism? Yeah. That's kind of how it's hard. That's how they kind of like got in the door to begin with. Yeah, but I don't think people understand that.

You don't think people understand that? No, when they go to the movies and they're like, oh, they're shoving this down our throats. Yeah, yeah, I don't know. Well, how did they blow it? You were saying, John, they already blew all their good will before. Yeah, she blew it because Marvel tried to buy its own distributor back in the 90s

and then become their own distributor. And so they just like hit everything with delays. So bad that that point that it busted a lot of comic shops out of business. And that spiral actually tanked things to the point where we're now three generations into that, right? So it's just a disaster now. I remember when like spawn did its own thing,

and then that battle chasers comic came out, and both of them, I was into it. I would go to the comic store and buy them, and then they just stopped coming out regularly, and I said, okay, fuck this. Like, I don't know, just see what's going on. I'm just out of comics, totally. All I know is I'm out of comics.

All I know is I can't do this. It's too much discipline. All I know is I'm into comics, and I hope to get a bunch't do this. It's too much discipline. All I know is I'm into comics and I hope to get a bunch of people back into it who used to be into it and new readers also. Okay, so then what's the deal with the whole comics gate thing? Like I don't know, I don't check in.

Yeah, I see Doug was online arguing with people and they're like, there's all this which Doug's to do. To Naples. There's all kinds of like weird bad blood every time I look everyone. It's like, Doug's a fucking dirtbag in this. Another guy is donating blood. Gay ops. Good. What the fuck is, I thought you guys were doing comics over here. Not, um, not, like, it became a lot of YouTube shows and that became internet blood sports light, you know,

okay. And so we haven't had any route versus Riley's sort of confrontations yet, but you know, that'd get a lot of clicks. Here's to hoping. Yeah, here's to hoping. If Mike, if Mike occurred us wants to roll, I'll do an MMA fight with him. So yeah, there's a lot of big things

in the undercard in the comic world. Yeah, there's a lot what? Big swinging dicks. Yeah, okay. What do you like, Doug? Do you have any kind of problems with Doug, Tenaiple, Doug tonight, Paul did this whole like I'm a principal conservative and you hang out with racist alt-right people sort of thing to me. So I got some bad blow with that because I'm just like F off, dude. Well, shit. Yeah. There you go, Sean.

Okay, you do. Can't keep everybody happy. Okay, so wait, you're the new book is Deus Volt. I can't keep everybody happy. Okay, so wait, the new book is Deus Volt. That's right, yeah, it's a crusader in a fantasy world. So I took like Chronicles of Narnia and John Carter and Conan and kind of just mashed them all up into awesome classic fantasy. And we even use the old art style because I don't like the modern sort of look

of already there. I think that you have a lot of class year of look. Do you like to? Looks cool, chicks used to be hotter. You draw chicks of look. Do you like to? Looks cool. Chicks used to be hotter. You draw chicks. You draw hot chicks, right? Big tits. I can't draw.

So probably not, but my artist draws hot chicks for sure. Okay. I see him. Yeah, they are hot. Yeah. Oh, you got some kind of a furry there. All right. At the day of summer.

I try to, you know, I try to get diversity going, you know, the furies, furies by books. What makes you a rage, man? What makes me a rage? Yeah. I don't know. I'm fun. Vito is in the chat. He says, I'm the ultimate troll. So maybe it's that.

Why? Why does he say that? Vito, why do you say that? I just, I just like to have fun, Vito. I'm, I'm just a nice guy, you know? What have you, what do you do to people's buttons sometimes? Yeah, what buttons have you been pushing? Let's see.

I've been going after the Geeks and Gamers group pretty hard this week because the whole Snyder cut thing. And then Snyder went on some stream and disavowed them, called them a hate group. I saw that. And then right after that, they just were like, here's our reaction to the Snyder cut.

It's great, we were watching it, we love it. It's that Snyder's awesome. And it's like, you guys are simps, pretty hard. Yeah. But, and then I went after the quartering a little bit to this week. Oh, no, why? What did he do?

Yeah. He's just in their circles with them and saying the same things, and they're really whining. Somebody called them all right in an article also, and they're really flipping out about it. And I'm like, dude, we've been dealing with this for years. Like, it's nothing new.

And now that it's finally trickling down to you guys, it's like, you're all but hurt about it. But you never really stepped up for the people who were quote, call the all right before. I don't like that when people do that distancing from people who they call for their extreme right. Because I'm just like, it's going to hit you eventually, dude. So.

I get this sense that everybody thinks that there's a redemption for them. Like they want to, they still want to be successful the traditional way, like with a big studio or whatever. That's the big deal. And whatever. And they think, they think if they just told the line a little bit, it'll get ignored that they had a conversation with me or that they were on the kill stream or so.

All these things exist, but I just, it's really important to always remember there is no escape from this. No, I mean, at this point you're getting canceled because you go like, they're acting like Nazis on Twitter if you're Hollywood star. Yeah. It's like, oh my gosh, how dare you see that literal Jews? It's like, come on. It's like everybody calls everybody Nazis

and has for decades. Like this isn't something to fire a lady over, but it is. Let me see, I had something about Batwoman. I pulled up screen rant. Batwoman's costume shows Batwoman's, it's a book. It's a future costume highlights flaws in female character design, a history of hyper, hyper sexualization and impracticality in the comic book female character design exposes itself in Batwoman's recent costume.

My God. Who thinks of this stuff? When they're reading comics or anything. I don't know. People would go, I'm actually reading comics. Who seems like the death of Ophelia and think like, oh, well, who would die? Who would fucking die in a pool looking away from,

that's so unrealistic. If someone was gonna die of poisoning and drowning in a pool, they would be face down. I know. Pants, get it out of here. Get it out of here. So weird. What?

It's, oh, you're telling me Jesus ate his last meal. They were all one side of the table. I'll try again. Try again, Vincent. Leonardo, try again. Yeah. That is our median and that's how right there. It's so fucking dumb. Yeah. Why who gave these people the who gave these people the the belief in themselves that they should

comment on anything. Well, yeah, the problem is the internet system for the media. And I was I was kind of brought in on this too is like all these article writers for all these sites to do click bay like this. They don't actually pay their writers. Like you saw the thing about the Huff Post a while back, but like all of them do this. They just bring in people to like give these hot takes and they'll write for free and they think they're gonna get exposure

for their career somehow and that's the whole business model. So you get a bunch of amateur hacks doing this with the whole deal. Oh yeah. Yeah. As soon as you read an article, you know that's the case.

Yeah. Uh, yeah. Well, do you think there's a, do you think there's a future for all the indie guys, John, or are they just going to keep calling each other bigger phrases than the other one? We've kind of, we've kind of like gotten a little better, honestly. Okay. So like, I mean, I ended up having to have a pretty big fight with like Ethan Vencek, I ever for a couple of years. And we kind of came together after this like January 6th thing. We kind of watched just like how they're just going to destroy anybody. Yeah. And try to take us all down. So we realized, you know, we're stronger together. We're going to work together. We're going to just like, you know, go forward. We'll have disagreements. But like, the industry wants us dead. It's not a matter of

just like, you know, having a stupid spat on Twitter or something like that. They actually want us in jail or dead. And that's what we're fighting against with these corporations, the government, the media, all of it. So we have to stand together and we have to come together and stop this nonsense if we want to actually build something that's different. Yeah, it was starting to be, I mean, it was just too cringe for me. I don't know what you guys are. You guys are writing comic books, not being comic books. Not being comic books.

We have schemes and stuff, Sean. Yeah. Well, it's happened many times where the character takes you. Yeah, I might make Ralph versus Riley the comic though. I mean, that looks like a pretty good superhero fight. Well, will the Riley show up in your comic or will he also duck out? I mean, I don't want to spoil it, you know Come on, all right, John plug your where can people go to get daysvolt?

Sure daysvolt on IndieGoGo right now and check it out. It's actually doing really great We've gotten $22,000 funded so far. Love to push that 25 over 30. We're gonna add like a nice fantasy map to the back of it. And if you love that classic style, you're absolutely gonna love this. Go check out the art, if anything. It's just nice to look at.

Artists is Jesse White. He's a great guy. I do. Let me see. There was one. Yeah, yeah. Esteban Marado. Is that who I'm thinking of? Is that an artist?

I don't know that name. No, you don't know that name, he's an old one. All right, man. Thank you for calling in. Hey, thanks for having me. Appreciate it. On this historic episode. Oh, one.

Good God. Can't believe it. The hell is going on. Can't believe no one from the other side wanted to call in. Yeah. Well, he's not in there. I guess he I guess he he vanished. I don't know. Oh, yeah, his little icon is set to moon 252 advice How to like sex from Bobby. Hey dick and Sean. Mm-hmm. Feel free to read this on the show I'm a 20-year-old virgin with no interest in sex or a relationship.

Lucky you. Bragging. I've never really had any. And it sucks because it seems like it's all anyone wants to talk about these days. At least it is with my friend groups. It makes me sad and angry. Whenever the topic comes up in conversation, I mean, it makes me both sad and angry too. Yeah, it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's actually makes you sad and angry. Whenever the topic comes up in conversation, I mean, it makes me both sad and angry too. Yeah, it's like, yeah, yeah. Sex actually makes you sad and angry. Uh oh, yeah. But I want it.

Yeah. I just, well, talking about, like I only want to do it. Does he jerk off? I mean, does he have a sex drive? And it still, it just makes me wish we could be kids again. In fact, when we didn't know what sex was. Okay.

A little bit of a curve ball. The very least I'm not mad at because even the thought of two people having sex makes me sick to my stomach. Oh wow. So watching them do it would make me vomit. Wait, what? But what he was talking about on that shitty film analysis podcast from one of the bonus

episodes where he talks about how sex wasn't all that great made me feel like a total chode for relating to him in that way. Well, it's odd. Yeah, I mean, it's odd to say. It's not odd to think, but it's odd to say that because you should know that it's odd. Like, it's not, oh, having odd opinions and ideas does not make you strange, not knowing that voicing them is extremely weird is what makes you strange. Like, oh hi, Sean, nice to meet you.

Hi, you smell weird. Like, that's a weird, thinking it's fine. Oh, oh, touching you is causing me silly feelings in my pants. Like saying it's weird. Yes. Oh, he's saying it's weird. Yeah, I mean, what the hell is wrong with me? If you didn't say it on a podcast on the internet, nothing.

That's the wonderful thing about not opening your mouth and saying something extremely bizarre. Right. Well, I mean, I don't know what he's looking for, but yes, that's not like, that's not in the 50th percentile of men your age. Yeah. Men your age would most likely be preoccupied with sex. That's true.

Should I get my T slash other hormones checked? Yeah, sure. Yeah. Should I try to get laid? And if so, what is the fastest way to get into a woman's pants without breaking the law? Well, I mean, you don't even what kind of sexual experience you're going to have that's not wanting not wanting sex, not wanting to talk about it and wanting to throw up. Is it going to? I mean, is it going to flip a switch? Well, that's the

thing that that sticks with me is like it makes he has like a visceral reaction to even the thought of it. Like, so what's going on? Have sex with a guy. If it causes you a visceral throw up reaction and you hate it, you don't want anything to do with it, well that'll fuck it'll be easier probably. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. There's a lot of questions.

A lot of questions. Should I even be thinking about relationships if I don't even feel attraction towards women or men for that matter? Do what you think is best, Ned? If you don't, so you have to be, okay, if you don't feel like you're honestly missing out and you're letting like expectations of your friend group.

You should do this, you should do that. Like if you're not missing out, you're like, it doesn't really interest me, then go do fucking something else. I do what I'm doing. It's not a requirement. Maybe you'll get there, maybe not. Plenty of guys, yeah,

plenty of guys don't bang. I mean, priests don't ever have sex, right? Well, not with grown women. Or they do, and it's just a big secret. Oh, I'm sure that's the case too. Yeah. That wasn't always the case. I think I like the 1100s that just started saying,

oh, we're all celibate now. Yeah. What the fuck? And now they take it seriously? Yeah. How? How? It just goes against nature. I mean, it's yeah. Yeah.

It's got a manifest itself somewhere else. It makes no sense. It makes no sense. It makes no sense. Yeah. Like you're telling me that that has had no effect on the church at all, making everybody celebrate. Well, it knows how to. I mean,

and you just then that was re that was figured out a thousand years ago. Yeah. Yeah. Did you do you think Jesus would have mentioned something about that in all of these hanging out with a whore? What was that all about then? We're all just letting that slide, whatever for Posterous. Yeah, go get your fucking hormones checked, too, though. You never know. Okay. Toilet girlfriend guy. Hey, Dickenshung.

I don't know the point of that guy who jerks off into the toilet, but once a girlfriend, anyway, did I read this? Oh, no, no, you read the original. Oh, yeah. This is his response. No, we haven't heard this. He's trying to say he wants a bro to live with without being called gay.

I'm 32 on multiple anti-psychotics and Parkinson's medication. Really? And I have a higher sex drive than that. Oh. So my assumption is a testosterone deficiency. 25-year-old men are technically in their sexual prime in your case.

That's a surprise or anti-psychotics. I don't fucking know. From the desk of the future mayor of a small town in Ohio, Captain Insano, okay. Captain Insano, huh? So he thinks he's gay. Oh wait, that was Captain Insano. Yeah.

He's the Farter and Walmart, right? Yes, he is. Now he's running for mayor. Right. Of a town. Let me see if I got anything else here. Hmm. Okay.

More advice? Yeah. Um. Hmm. Advice. How to be single. Stop taking a shot. So faithful, long time listener here.

Patiently awaiting the next road rage LA and hoping to get a bit of a perspective on women. Here we go. I recently got out of a five year relationship. I'm 26 years old. Wow, big relationship. And I've rebounded into a situation where the new girl wants more than I'm willing to offer. Well, that's emotionally. Yeah. That's like, that's the story is old this time. Let me help you out with that. You can never give enough. Right there. Okay. Let me help you out with that. You can never give enough.

There is never a moment where you will go to bed at night and she'll go, I'm emotionally fulfilled. You can always give a little bit more until they're scraping out the inside of your brain with an ice cream scoop. Like a candle lop. Yeah. It's always a little more emotionally you have in the tank. So. Until that licking the inside of the tank, open up and take that melon baller.

I've always thrown myself into relationships as a trial by fire approach to growth, with more interest in what the new experience would teach me, rather than how the girl fits into my life. Have I read this one? Son of a bitch. If that's actually true, well, he's only had one, no, I know. One relationship. What is the fucking around?

Me and I have always, last time you, I'm, who knows, he probably did it in high school or whatever. Oh yeah. No, I know. But it's, but it's, but it's, but it's, but it's, it's, We're running, we're forced to interact as much as he can do. Sexual prime. He only has had so much time.

So, she's definitely had a lot of fun in a total babe, but like kind of a dumb lib hoe. I guess what I'm writing for is a wise and manly perspective on how to be single as I don't spend too much time in between girls. Man, you fucking 26. How would you prescribe a 26 year old man view women in his life? How would you prescribe that a 26 year old man view women in his life? How would you prescribe that a 26 year old man view women in his life?

A healthy dose of empathy is keeping me from pumping and dumping. Um, that bitch. Thoughts of not being available, if I meet a better match come to mind in regards to commitment. Thoughts of not being available. available, if I meet a better match, come to mind in regards to commitment, thoughts of not being available. If I meet a better match, come to mind in regards to commitment. What does that mean? It means his guilt would keep him in a relationship and keep him from pursuing if he

found a better match. Optimizing. We're optimizing. Optimizing. I guess. Yeah. Yeah. Optimizing utility here. Anyway, I. I guess. Yeah, yeah. Optimizing utility here. Anyway, I think too much for my own good. This is why I drink.

Appreciate you taking time to read this and thank you for all the content through all the years. Winners drink especially is one of the most fun I've had with the boys. Stay Raged, go to go to go the uncut honk. Oh wow, did he write in before? Yeah, I mean, it doesn't matter.

Just do whatever you want. Pump and uh, I proposed to Yeah, I mean, it doesn't matter. Just do whatever you want. Pump and, uh, proposed to her tomorrow. It really just doesn't matter. But see, like that advice, like this is a guy who thinks too much. Yeah, women don't, women don't matter at all.

That's my advice for you. That's what any age, they just, and you don't matter to them. I can't stress that enough. You could break up with them at any age, they just come and you don't matter to them. I can't stress that enough. If you're, you could break up with them at any moment, they'll be okay. They'll find another guy who is better or worse than you. That's it. But just whatever you do, but they will find another guy. They will find another guy faster than you think. Oh, yeah. More than you think too. And you will think exactly the same stupid shit that you do about, well, what am I doing?

Or he'll think, oh, there's other insane shit. God, this is the one. This is the one. We've known this girl in a past life, there'll be any level of insanity. They have, they can rise or sink to to me. If you're 26, you should be thinking about work. Mother Vagory, you should be thinking about making money.

What do you think, anything about that? No, it's good. Let's see here. Call me Rattie B or Rat Bastard, if you need to read my name. Okay, hey, Jack and Sean. I'm 14 and I'm trying to fuck my mother's 29 year old friend. Oh, thank God there was an S on the end of mother's. With big tits. Whoa, try to fuck his mother's friend. Oh, thank God there was an ass on the end of mothers with big tits. Uh, whoa, his mother's friend. Yeah, with big tits, big tits,

d's to double d's. And I've gotten pretty close. God, wow. How old are you for background 14? Really? Okay. I always, I wanted the hot moms at 14, man. Oh, yeah. Who does that? No doubt. Good luck for background. I'd like to note that, so I want to, for background, I'd like to note that this woman lives

with me. She sleeps on the couch of a small tube bedroom apartment that I live in. She's almost definitely an alcoholic and a horde. Which has helped me out. But because I, you can totally fuck her. You could totally fuck her. She's a disaster. She's a disaster.

She's a fucking mess, man. She's probably committed a felony already. Yeah. I've been trying to get her to see me as more than a child. She already does. Oh, yeah. Yeah. See him is more than a child.

So yeah, bring in like a smaller child and put like a beanie, like a propeller beanie on them and have them like carrying all their Pokemon cards. And then you just wear like a suit. You want to talk about the office a lot, business, things that you're doing. Yeah. During the day, you got to keep the idea. Talk about your favorite bands that are from her era. Like figure out, let's see, she's 29. Oh, she's 29.

She's 10 years younger than us. So she would have been a class of, class of 2009. What were the big hits in 2009? She would have been a class of 2009. What were the big hits in 2009? What were the big music, top 40, 2009, Billboard chart, 2009. The Black Eyed Peas, okay, poker face lady Gaga. God, God, God, yeah, she was like, just dance, I gotta feel it.

You gotta memorize these songs from 2009 and this era and that's what you talk to her about Jason Morath. What was the what was the box office hits from 2009 box office the high school jams That's all women give a shit about That's when their brains stop maturing when they're 17 and that's what they retain for the rest of their around to read. Marley and me, Paul Blart, sit down and watch some Paul Blart, he's just that into you. Yeah, this is your just memorize this shit. Race to which mountains should probably appreciate that meme. Just come home with a good bottle of wine, pour her a glass and sit down with a glass of your own.

Take a glass of wine and cut a hole in the bottom and clear your races through it. And then, drop her the study about kids, penis is shrinking. And say, by the way, this hasn't happened to me. Yeah. A lot of little boys have shrunken penises, but my little boy penis is quite

impressive. I really must say. My strategy for that was making an increasing amount of sexual jokes. Do not do that. That is what children do. I've gone from making a quip about me being into women at all to talking about her getting so jobs. Settle. Is this real, do you think? Probably not real. I don't know, probably not. I don't know. It was surprising that I wasn't uncomfortable doing it

after I decided to because I've had so much time to fuck around with this woman due to being forced to go to school online and my mother barely being a parent. I've been able to stop caring about saying sexual shit. This strategy has worked for the most part. Numerous times, she's admitted to forgetting my age. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Oh boy, but I still thought nothing more would happen than me seeing her tits accidentally a couple of times. I was wrong. What do you mean?

You were wrong. That's where he ended it. Well, really? Are you sure? Yeah, it's where he ended it. It didn't like not print out. Well, I can look at my email. It seems like an odd place to end it.

Yeah. There he goes. A boy, a young boy just like us, Sean. Yeah. Just like we were. Oh my God, no, you're right. I knew it. Oh, no, this is way too fucking big. He's got like, oh, no way, come on.

Look at the size of this fucking email. Where did you stop? Right here. Most erotic, a couple of days, here, a couple of weeks had passed. I'm invested. I know, I was wrong. One day, a couple of hours before she had to go to work and after she had drunk a lot,

I put on Harold and Kumar's escape from Guantanamo Bay. About 30 minutes into the movie, when I believed that we had got into the topic of me being into women. She showed me one of her breasts, her explanation was that I needed to see a real woman's breasts, so I didn't end up with some small titted woman in high school, but that was the only thing that happened. If that was the only thing I had to happen, right?

I wouldn't be writing in. She went from showing me her breasts to having me grab and slap them. Uh, wow. That is, that's dangerous. That is, this is a felony, right? I don't know actually where you live. Uh, then having me grab and slap them next to instructing me on how she likes it, grabbed and slapped. She literally says the porn line of let me teach you something. Eventually, she took her bottoms and walked around, off and walked around. Oh my goodness. I can't read this. I can't read this. It's too much. Even if

it is real, I have no idea. So be careful. So if it's really, I don't think what you're doing is. I mean, because chicks, it seems fun, but there's a reason, there's a reason that they pray on the young and it's because they can trap you in a relationship and fuck with your head and really mess up your life. You should, you should probably tell your mom, this is happening. What the fuck do I know though? Call the police. I don't know.

Everybody, this is the big show. Picture, I can't say. Yeah, that one. Yeah. I've done the same thing you did, but I fucked. It's fucked. I can already I can't say. Yeah, that one. Yeah. I've done the same thing you did, but I fucked. It's fucked. I can already see what's, what's, what's, what the fuck does. I know the depraved mentality of women and they are to be stayed away from at the kind

of, at the difference in power levels that you're talking about. The only trouble. I'm telling you, it's never going to be good for you. They are, they will fuck you. They will try to fuck you. They always have something else in mind. They will try to, they will try to fuck you, they always have something else in mind, they will try to mess up your life no matter what, no matter what, they have no empathy.

They have no empathy, women are a black hole, women are a black hole that feed off of emotion and that spit poison, tell your mom, but I would have done the same thing in your shoes, but I think you should tell your mom or dad or call the police. This is Middic show. Patreon.com.

Such a dick. So see you next Tuesday. I mean, yeah, flow, it doesn't sound like there's going to be a fight. A scar. I don't know what ad read you're talking about. I'm sorry. Tell me. I'm going to play voice mails.

And then we can see. I can't believe Riley didn't call in. Yeah, I would think he's usually not shy about confrontations. Doesn't seem like it. Yeah, I don't know, man. I don't know. Hey, Dick, I just wanted to call in and say you're fat. Oh, sorry, Sean. That's me. Love you, Sean. Love you too, Pat.

Oh, man. I thought I was going to call in and say you're fat. Well, sorry, Sean. That's me. Love you, Sean. Love you, too. Pat. Oh, man. I thought I was going to lose like 20 pounds on my juice cleanse. Yeah, just get rid of all the fucking salt and water. And I don't know, man.

I didn't probably lost two. Put it all back on. Well, I found that we were fantasizing about what we're going to eat after the juice cleanse. It's like, well, what the hell? Right. Why am I going to pound two? Why am I depriving myself? Yeah. Exactly. Yeah, you'll undo it. I mean, it's not like you can't do it in a few days. This isn't changing my lifestyle. Well, that's right. Hey,

Decaution here. Exactly. What's up? You hear on movies that think that they're fucking comedies. Like, there's no fighting superhero movie or, wow, really? I guess it's even trickling down to just all over mainstream movies. Everybody thinks that they're a fucking comedian in these films. They gotta have a million fucking quits to say, whoa, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo.

You know, it fucking knows it, the Snyder tie and everything. Like, the snippder cut and everything. The snippet I've seen so far is just really dumb joke being told in a very serious setting. You see this time and time again, there's gonna be a new Thor film, oh man, Thor Ragnarck was great, no it wasn't. It was fucking horrible, it was really shitty jokes told by a New Zealand guy who can't understand anything

other than how to fuck sheep. And then fucking you know now you have the second suicide squad. It looks fine I guess. But again they're gonna hey here's Margot Rubio being you know fucking a. So funny. Yeah. Harley Quinn. He wanted to most annoying fucking characters and they just they never learned that yeah she is you know that she's just annoying kid rid of her from fucking films like she's just horrible actress in everything and that character is just grading but it just but it might like like my original point is it's all these films they think they're fucking comedy we gotta have a joke every 10 seconds every scene has to have some stupid little fucking joke about something. And then oh yeah, here's a big action thing and here's another joke.

The boys do the same thing and it's so fucking annoying. I'm tired of this stupid shit. He doesn't like jokes. Sometimes it's so bad. It's so bad. It's sexy. I know. I think probably the best example of how it's a sexy you know i think probably the best example i know what he means i was done right is the first guardians of the galaxy film it does a great you know i agree

that was movie was fun shut the fuck up and they just keep on moving it's good it makes sense you know they interrupt the jobs in the garden oh i gotta have a quick gotta have a quick oh yeah and have everybody do this weird, confused,

space reaction to, to every single line. Anyway, go fuck yourself. Yeah. Yeah. The Zack Snyder Cutter, whatever, it was just horrible with that. Oh, yeah. When they tried to, but they, it was just, they just did not land. Nothing landed. Because you're like, well, these two people just met two seconds ago and got thrown into a movie together. Like, it's like, it's like in boxing when you, if you block a punch, the person throwing the punch has spent less energy than if you move and they miss you. So you can tire someone out faster by dodging

because then it's like all the effort spent and throwing the punch, pulling it back, well, it's awesome, then just bouncing it off of you. It feels the same way about jokes, not landing in movies, like missing the joke. It's not just, oh, miss joke. It's like that really took it out of me.

Yeah, you took emotion from me and it's constant. It's true. It's a constant assault on your emotional reservoirs when watching these movies, nothing to fill them up. Yeah, because a lot of these filmmakers, they can recognize it when it works. And so then they try to do it in their movies or their scripts or whatever and it doesn't.

Yeah, here's a Marine. It was a big fight of context. I could go and shine. What's up? Well, I'm a Marine. Fuckin'. And I'm watching the show right now. I'm listening to this guy, a fucking an army talk about how they're having

to do all these classes and shit on fucking, you know, this white supremacy shit. And I just wanted to get my two things on it real quick. I don't want to be a dead or something, but yeah, I had to attend one of those fucking classes as well, and it was fucking ridiculous. It's got some context to this fucking, I'm a black guy. Oh, should've led with that, sir. I had to go to a, by all means, on why I shouldn't be a white supremacist. That was being taught by a female white captain. It's like, what the fuck are you kidding me?

Are you fucking serious? Shouldn't he just be exempt? I'm telling you, what the fuck are you kidding me? Are you fucking serious? Shouldn't he just be exempt? I'm telling you what? What are you doing? What? I know. Excuse me. It's like, if it's point you can't get mad over this shit. Like, you got to laugh. You got to laugh at it because it's actually really fucking funny. Fucking white woman. It's probably extra funny to him. You can't get a mad over it. You're going to come in a mass shooting. Yeah.

Yeah. It's like, fuck it. This is just what's going on right now, you know? Fuck it. Who cares? Like one or a half million. Like a blackout. I just ask him about fucking it, pull it on to itself.

And then everyone's going to be like, you know, what? Why are we, what's going on? You know, it's gonna reach, it's logical conclusion with all this fucking, you know, rich and thinly bullshit. And it's just gonna pull it up on itself. No, I can't wait to see that day. No, we will be going to camps.

Are we? I cannot stress this. Get this off the, I guess. We will be from Texas.. I cannot stress this. I get. We will be from Texas. Siphon from Texas. Dick and Sean and the liberals is there. Black guy. Contact you in my office.

I want to talk to you about white supremacy. I am a white lady. Yeah. So I have this presentation that I need to talk to you about. Mm-hmm. Mr. Black Marine. Yeah. Well, he's got a, you know, everybody else has to do it.

So he's got to be in the group too, I guess, is, but yeah, I mean, he's got a, what would you be thinking if you're him sitting there? I mean, you got to think about probably exactly in Wings, Sean. Probably exactly, oh, good God. Exactly how he described it, probably just like laugh at it. I mean, because, you know, because nobody accept him, if he's the only black guy in that group, then nobody accept him is gonna have, like, is gonna be able to relate at all.

You just gotta show up acting so black that it's like offensively black, like walking it, you know, walking in 13 minutes late. All right, here I am right on time. Right. What do you think about that? You know, he obviously speaks, he should just play up the Abonix part.

As sure. Why not? Like the most offensive stereotype possible. Right. What's she thinking? I don't know. All right. Well, thanks for coming in. Yeah. I have to talk to you about white supremacy. Mm-hmm. Cringey. Dick and Sean's big bride here. Yep. You know, I just had to hand this thought in

all of the, in the entire world, right? We have the most brilliant minds and thousands of years of technology and innovation and our ability to understand these complex topics and important stuff. Our, he says. And space travel, forgot to say. We are, we are in advance civilization. No doubt. Okay.

But I gotta say, there's something almost charming. At the end of the day, we can look at a boat and be like, man, that boat is stuck. That boat is not going in with it. So. Yeah. You get that happen. Sometimes that's how it is. Too big for your bridges.

Just remember, we're all just a bunch of stuck boats. I want another boat to get stuck in there. Yeah, I wouldn't have any thing. I'll pile up like a beaver dam. Like where are all the eco terrorists? Why aren't they cramming boats and they're non-stop? That's all it takes is squish boats into canals and it fucks up all the consumption of the world?

You idiots. God, that's funny. Okay, that's funny. Yep, when you think you got the universe knocked. A boat will get stuck. We'll get stuck. That's funny. Hey, Dick, hey Sean. What's up? I've got a rage for you. universe knocked about will get brown that's funny

hey dick hey shon i got a rage for you a women in their weird phobias mhm now my grandmother i love her don't get me wrong but she's got this

weird bread thing going on bread or breath? no one bread gets wet like in it crumbles up falls apart Gets all soggy. It's disgusting. It's gross. I don't like it. I don't think anybody likes it No, I don't like it whenever you even mention wet bread around her You can just mention it. Just say the phrase wet bread She will just start gagging like com, like a comical out of a fucking movie or something, like just, I like she's gonna throw up and it's serious, like she

really feels that way. And every single time without fail, she will gag for like two minutes straight. Just thinking about my fucking attention that she needs. I don't know, that's a phobia, that's like a- I'd up in your hand or, you know, anything to do with bread in a weird way. Like, I don't know if something happened to her in a childhood that involved bread or something. I just know that,

if it did, you would know. I'd be like, don't you think, don't you think what hair is disgusting? Like, if it's like in the shower drain or something? I don't make a big scene about it if I ever see it. No, but it's like, oh, God. Yeah.

What bread isn't even that bad? Well, but maybe it's the same response for her. That's weird. Women always finding like things to get worked up about, that they could tell you about classic women. Let's see what else I got here. Oh, okay. Classic women Let's see what else I got here. Oh Okay Jake what in the fuck is wrong with you and your California dumb shit

Brain no, I don't want some fucking drag queen Oh reading stories to my kids What the fuck dude? I'm into some degenerate shit. Then don't. Mm-hmm. Pretty easy. Because the dope thing, if you want to be around it, you want to watch a bunch of drag queens, whatever.

Do whatever the fuck you want. Right. But some motherfuckers dressing up in a dress with his dick, mushed up on his butt crack so he doesn't bulge out so much. So he's really thought about this. He's not going to the library with my kid Does he have kids reading a fucking door? What do you think? Yeah? I'll come out and say it. I think that's fucking weird

So don't do it. Yeah, some priest wanted to spend some alone time with an officer boy, too So let me be fucking consistent on that. Yeah, I know that's consistent What's a fuck dude? What's the consistency? Of course I don't want to fuck it. And don't do it. We have a story time. That's not to it. What's the thought of wrong with you?

Nobody's forcing you to. Right, dude. Nobody's forcing you to. Oh, absolutely. No, then don't. Right. That's what's great. All of these problems can be solved with just don't.

Yeah. Well, I don't want to have a warm, I don't know how I want to have a attractive woman in my comic that's showing a lot of skin then don don't buy. Yeah. Yeah. Don't have the comic in. That's it. That's like God. I don't have a superhero movie with a bunch of quips in it. Well, then it goes. Don't go see it. There you go. Done. I don't have drag queens reading my kids. Don't don't do it. But then I have nothing to say. Well, but then I have nothing to talk about. Then I have nothing to rail against. Yeah, railing.

The people pointing out hypocrisy is just so weak to me online, like the people, and it goes on all day, all fucking day conservatives. Oh, well, so when kids were in cages on the board with Trump, it was a constant judge game, but now it's now it's not a big deal It's like, you know, what is the point of what you're doing? Yeah, I don't know what is the point some idiot responded to me Everybody's fucking if we pointed out they'll stop doing it like why do you think that? Yeah, what in your mind? Because you would stop because you don't want to look like a hypocrite. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they don't give it that's why Yeah, they don't give a shit. Mm-hmm, right and actually you don't give a shit like a hypocrite. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They don't give a shit. That's why. They don't give a shit.

And actually, you don't give a shit. If anybody points it out in you, you just say, well, it's different. That's not, I'm not a hypocrite. Everybody's there. I cannot see that. God, just stop pointing it out. Yeah.

Well, actually, how come it's not okay for me to murder you, but it is okay for you. Oh, that's the only end for those guys. Hey, Dick, you know what makes me a rage? It's prank purchase signaling. If people who see pranks, YouTube videos on Reddit, anything like that, and immediately they come up,

so these are the good clings. For no one gets hurt. Oh, okay. He surprised this girlfriend with flowers. Oh, these are the kind of pranks that I like. No one was hurt. No one was embarrassed. So flowers and farts, spray videos where nobody was hurt.

Nobody was hurt. This is a good kind. See, why can't more pranks? Or can't I just get a good cup of coffee? Hmm. Um, not weird to think. I'll just be annoying to say of coffee. Hmm. Now we're just thinking of annoying to say. One more.

All right. Hey fellas, the mighty plan day in here. Just a, was meant to the most recent episode and the questioning came up about birth control. And, eh, well, they can talk up the daily pill. So maybe, well, no, no, no. How can they possibly screw up the monthly pack? They can.

Three month injection. Let me tell you how the decked trun, whatever else is listening, they can fuck them all up. Now, because they just can't count. Mm-hmm. They fuck up the pill. Yeah, they'll fuck up the monthly booking patch. They will fuck up the every three month injection because bitches can't go uh... work

oh we can't have sex because uh... miss my appointment uh... miss my appointment oh well, we'll just be careful

oh wow there's three minutes of this call is that right? oh wow, we're going to have to do it she's already pregnant because it didn't pull out because she knows she missed the appointment. Oh, wow, he's going to win halfway done. She's already pregnant. Because it didn't pull out. Because you didn't know she missed the appointment. We thought you had something.

You better be alert. Our fucking case about everything. See you later, Monday. What bathroom? Walking every three months. Even the IUD for every six fucking years, you better know when that shit runs out. Hey, babe, did you take your bill today? Hey

babe did you get your fucking patch replaced today? Hey babe did you get your fucking injection today? Oh no I do I was overdue but I thought we'd be okay because until we put Okay, because it's only a month since my three month injection Thank you very much I'll change work pretty much on schedule with that up Yeah, they got a sticker on him you need to keep track of it. Yeah, don't press her to do it This guy in my case Preacher that it was intentional. Oh my God, I had a present. My case, fuck.

I'm pretty sure that she knew she was overdue, and she was rolling in them dice hoping that this baby daddy would walk away like the last one did, and she didn't count on them. And baby, daddy, just stick around and try and do the right thing and raise his fucking head more than 10 years later. I've got soul custody and the fucking incubator hasn't been in the picture for a long time. Yeah.

Anywhere. Wow. So what he showed her. Fucking a bitch. Do I have to lay my mind? Wow. So what he he showed her. Fucking a bitch. God damn it. I ran out of time. I'm sorry sir. I don't know what was the point that they're going to fuck it up no matter what it is, no matter what birth control.

Oh, they will fuck it up with this point. A lot of rage. Flow, flow Euphoria wanted to call in and do. Okay, let me see. Flow Euphoria. What is your your you have some kind of a promo for the fight right hmm yeah how's my sound sounds good fun sounds good yeah ladies and gentlemen let me present to you the kill stream king the wonton dawn defender of the dittled, a protector of private property, the Pog Patrol patron, the marauding man of Memphis, the nullifier of no. He's got torpedoes for thumbs and he's here to repeal, not only the 19th Amendment, but also the Dela Tere's Degents. Eeeethin Ralph! When it comes right down to it, folks, you'll never peacefully sunset the kill stream

and you can't abort the retort. On the other side, we have the void gaser himself, his briefcase full of joy, close at hand. The OG of VA, provocateur of peril, the champion of minty fresh mixed greens, the diviner of delirium he has taken myself to new heights and will continue to stare into the shit abyss while he gonsos across the green belt. Riley Viseeay!

You know for a fact he's in it to win it and he will do whatever it takes to reign supreme while getting cream. Stay tuned to learn more about this epic showdown that may take place at the next road. Yeah, you got me at torpedoes, but thums. Yeah, I'm the honest. Yeah, that's a good one. Thank you for all you, Victoria. Pretty creative. Welcome. Thanks, man. Oh, man, that would be really epic if Riley had called in. I'm sure his excuse will be compelling. Hey, did congratulations on the new part. It seemed like a very womanly thing to get yourself without any kids at all.

So I got you a very womanly gift. You're very own, surprisingly accurate, astrological reading. I hope you get some entertainment out of it. It's on the keychain flash drive, which you can hopefully keep from losing more road rage footage on like an idiot. And you got me a bunch of Amish popcorn. The rest is for your other than the book. The rest is for you other than the book, which is for Sean.

Hold on, let's see. No, is this the book? This must be, oh, this is a book. Here you go. There you go. All right. Sean, you glorious man. I would have gotten you an animal book if I could find one with a single fact you didn't already know. So here's something completely different. Keep up the great work you two, Mr. Bade.

Oh my god. What is it? PS1's a new book. Just like fucking sperm confetti fell out. Disgusting. It's all over my pants. Well, that's one excuse. I'm too stupid and lazy to look into the mailing you that Mr. Badew wild turkey egna refrigerated so they don't have to wait. Oh, thank you, Mr. Badew. Got a bunch of Amish popcorn. Here's the flash drive that he's talking about.

And all that the rain promises and more a hip pocket guide to Western mushrooms. Oh, you're gonna get into mushrooms? I don't know. I mean, maybe I, dude, there's like, I mean, look, look at the cover. How could you not? Look what this guy's doing.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Okay. It was cool. Cool. Yeah. And then this is, this is from, this is from Captain Insano.

Probably the wrong one, but it should suffice until you get the right one. Let's see here. One of these Amazon things. Oh my. It's exactly what I always wanted, Sean. One of those titty mouse pads. Oh, God. Yeah. Isn't that great? What's it feel like? It just as good as the real thing. Really? I'm going to be honest. This feels better. This feels at least as good as an actual woman.

Maybe better. Like a nice... Thank you very much, Kag of Sand. Like a nice back of sand. That is, I'm gonna pretend I don't know what character that is. All right, buddy. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks. Thank you, everybody except for Riley. How? That is. All right, buddy. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, everybody except for Riley. Good.

How? What possible, what possible reason? No, I'm disappointed. Hey, what's up? Fuck you. Yeah, fuck you. I hit you, fuck you. Goodbye.

I mean, that's kind of what happens. Oh, no. Life's full of disappointments. Maybe there'll be developments over the next week. Goodbye. See ya. disappointments. Maybe they'll be developments over the next week. Goodbye. See ya.