The Dick Show - Episode 261 - Dick on Fat Brain

Episode Date: June 1, 2021

Topless Elliot Page marks the first day of summer, the war on blackface, kid-friendly Pride, lack of bidets, fat brain, how to poop, Seth Rogan contributes to the balkanization of comedy, and Sean has a blowout; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

What is that show that I'm singing? Not sure. Dada, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da,, it's from the dick show. Oh, that's the dick show? No, I know, which it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like da da. Ah, what's up gentlemen? Well now I'm trying to figure out where that sign comes from. Yeah. Da da da da da. I do think it is just like what

of a generic like movie stand-ins for like a tonight show. No, that's from something. Is that? Da da da da da. Yeah. Someone's gonna know. Where is everybody?

Everyone have the day off here? Or are we just that early? People are so used to me being late. Yeah, what the fuck? Where is everybody? People are saying it's the tonight show. It's the tonight show? Somebody says.

Dun dun dun dun dun. All right, well, it's the tonight show. It's the tonight show. It's the tonight show. Today's show with Jay Leto. Dun dun dun dun dun. No. It's gotta be it.

Maybe. There did he change it. To be more the laments changed it. Yeah, it might have been the original tonight show. Da da da da da da da. Minutes before the show is weird. Yeah, that's true. It is weird.

I sound terrific. It must be you, Johnny. Is it? No. It's not me. I fixed all this sound though. Oh. Right before Sean left. Oh. look at this, look at this, look at this Swiss cheese sandwich

I've got here. Yeah, look at this. I was trying to make sense. I'm going to go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go,

go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go years out, but I navigated these channels successfully. That's how to bring you cantillions hitting on sports brought Taylor to bring you that magic that I've done all of this to bring you that. So he could hit on her from discord to Skype where she video calls in because I don't want to put her in discord because then people will have easier access to talk to her. Very good.

And then that will be the end. That was the end of Chris the Kiwi, right. Access. So I'm keeping Taylor and my walled guard and my tower, my ivory tower of Skype. Is that the correct usage of ivory tower veto? Yeah. Is it just tower? Because Rapunzel wasn't in an ivory tower.

It was just a big tower. What does ivory tower come from? I think they don't know. It's just signal prestige and wealth. Well, that's not what this show signifies. It's more of a shitty tower. Shitty tower. Lumber tower. When is this going to turn into a furry server? Now, this is a furry show. You didn't know that? This is a furry show for furries.

We just don't talk about it that much. Of course. We should all discuss our personas. Yes. Mine is wild paw, the tiger. Oh wow, man. You might, can you bump them up a little bit, Johnny? Test one, one, two. And then I think we're ready to go.

Hot dog. Uh, and my partner is, what is your partner? Uh, snow, snow for snow, snow, snow, snow, like, you put fur in the first sauna. Is that the ultimate set up for Adam human? Adam human, human, human, human, Adam human. My name is Alpharmanstein.

I come to live among the first. Oh my God, I woke up to a reminder today. You know what, the Google, do you use Google Photos or maybe Apple Photos does? No, Apple, Apple doesn't do this. This is a Google photo only feature. It's called the, hey, remember how fat you were? Feature?

Where every day or so, it'll pop up a, here's how fat you were five years ago. And of course it's you, so you have to swipe on them. It was five years ago today that I was in Mexico with 80s girl, secretly, remember. Right. And we're working on that which would become the Dixho episode one, which is the five-year episode, Sean of anniversary next week.

I had said, actually it said, it didn't even say, look how fat you were five years ago. It popped up a picture of a urinal, a Mexican urinal that had a big ice block in it. And as soon as I saw that urinal, it took me back like, right, I was like, oh my God, I remember how aggravating this urinal was built out of tile that they didn't trim. So you have to piss, launch your piss over an entire section of tile. You know how much Mexicans love just I'm cutting things eyeballing it off right like well you know this this comes as a whole and then you put it the whole on like I just cut it in half. There you go that's just as good and it's

like a round and a jagged edge on the other side. Okay. This time they decided not to do that in the tile that they then that the purpose for it was to put on the top of the lip between the drain and the trough of the pisser and the piss, piss or the view between you and the pisser. Yeah. So you have to, any kind of dribbles or squirts or false starts just are like a track like the Delorean's fire fire. Yeah. Going back from your piss, splattering all over your, I took a picture of that.

So I'm going to talk about this. Fire going back from your piss splattering all over your I took a picture of that So I'm gonna talk about this Picture of your penis hanging over a Mexican urinal. I might not my feet. That's very generous of you But no, it's just the urinal. I've got to I've got to pull it up, right? Yeah, I mean, I think like now we got to see what you're talking about now You got to see what I'm talking about and then I'll show you how fat I am Memories together here we go go. Here we go. Here we go. Oh, no, these aren't.

I got my Google memory and it was a very racist totem pull outside of gas station on the way to Vegas. I'm not going to be happy. What do you mean? There's this gas station. If you're on the way to Vegas from LA, you can stop at and they've just got this weird, like metal sculpture.

Yeah. Five years ago, it popped this up and I thought, oh my god, that's a mirror. I thought, oh my God, I remember. You know, right? Yeah, that's super deep. The ice in there isn't. Look at that. Jesus Christ.

That's very odd. You want to see how fat I am. I'm going to block out. 80s girl, this is the picture. The very next picture is 80s girl taking a hilarious pretend to drink out of a novelty size Jack Daniels bottle as though that had never been done. Hey, let's take a picture to start off our Mexico trip.

Sure, let me just grab this novelty-sized bottle of jacked annuals that still has the wrapping on it, the cellophane safety thing on it. So, it's not open. And I'm going to take a pretend, I'm going to put my hand on the nozzle. So you can't see that It's not open. And I'm gonna take a pretend, I'm gonna put my hand on the nozzle. So you can't see that it's not glowing. That's not off. I'm sorry, that's wonderful. That's hilarious, she should be a Canadian.

Yeah. Yeah. There's the, there's the Canadian. Is she really drinking that? You know what? Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Wow. So thank you all for listening for five years. You know what? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha How come today you want to get you need to get it as a show episode? Kind of just gonna be a live from now bronchered using the hardest city of failure

I'm your host Nick Maxson, okay, the 20 million out of man, where did America's worst Mexican? 111 weeks running joining me for today is Johnny the audio engineer. What's up, dick? Johnny on the spot, did you like that Kendall and Hyde song? I loved it. Friends and family loved it. You fucking Kendall knocked that shit out of the car. Say it for your friends and family.

Oh yeah. Whoa, hey everybody look at this song that this guy wrote about me like that. Oh yeah, I went out the gate and was just like, you know what? I am so great, you should all fucking know about this. Tell me about your favorite parts of the song too. That's what you told them. Give me your favorite parts and they better all be different and unique to this song. The Fanny Pack part was pretty good.

Yeah. I still have that collection. A Fanny Packs. Yeah. Hey, that's a great man. The software company is known for not giving anyone free shit ever. Yeah.

And so I got four free Fanny Packs from, I was like, what's up, idiots? Like, why would they send you, like, because you're so cool that they want runoff cool. And runoff representation is like, this guy probably knows three cool guys. It was at a trade show. And I was wearing a fluorescent jacket.

So when I showed up, they were like, ah, well, you need these. The mask I need to make. Yes, I do. Okay. And joining, thank you for being here in this very unhealthy show. Thank you for killing yourself, Vito. Joining us is Vito.

Hello, dick. Hello, how, how, how was your experience rebooting the biggest problem in the universe? Thank you. I've only had known you instead of my girlfriend five years ago. We could have just rolled the old show into the new one. Straight forward into the new thing. My life would be so much better. Well, it's been a whirlwind, dick. Yeah. Ever since we've rebooted that show, I mean, hundreds are pouring out of the woodwork to congratulate me on my fantastic performance. I wish I had a drum roll that I would play because we'd always do it to be getting you the old show,

which problem we did a thing called which problem had the most votes? Oh wow, that's a creative name you came up with. Yeah, which problem had the most votes? from shouldn't you go from bottom to top? Are you go right to the top? I don't I don't remember why we we did it. There was some autism At play. Yeah, I can't find where Scott. I've had this stuff together. This wasn't up to me I can't I actually can't find right I listed them out. It was what I need a control F on my eyes I'm I can't look for things anymore. I can't search on a paper. Well, I saw it on the...

No, I can't search on a piece of paper. Let me pull it up here. Yeah. I know a woke marketing had the most votes. Yeah, I think so. I think, you know, it's weird. I went in blind to a format I've never done before and surmounted the king. You had the most votes.

That's all that's all that's all that's all that it's just means to because people people are voting on the problems themselves. Sure. They're not voting. It's not like a it's not. Yeah, Vito, there's no winning. Oh, okay. Well, we all win.

So like if you won, you would never play like a comical song to like taunt the person who maybe had lost that would be a thing. Look, it's about the problems are there to stand on their own. Right. Either of us could bring in the same problem, we could even just argue at ourselves about the problem. It doesn't matter. So the fact that woke marketing came in with the most number of votes is ultimately meaningless. Ultimately meaningless. Right. By the dip came in with the most number of votes is ultimately meaningless. Ultimately meaningless. Right. By the dip came in second.

That's good for me. Oh, the mine which came in second. It's very important. Yeah. Pokemon cards, scalping came in third, pronoun resistance. I can't believe that people weren't more receptive to my very intellectual problem. Yeah. I can't believe more people weren't like,

wow, Dick, I never thought of it that way. I should change my behavior. Thank you for correcting me. You really thought telling everyone to assume gender-neutral pronouns was gonna... Yeah, I did. Just blow people's minds. Let's see what I got here.

Sean sent in a text message about his trip so far, which I hoped was going poorly. And it is. So that's good. He said, it's a disaster. The rental, the fucking rental SUV blew out a tire one day and the cooling system fucked up on the next, changed a tire on the side of the 10 freeway

with trucks whizzing by before triple A could get there and the spare was flat also. So they had to come anyway. If it fucks up again, I'm going to drive it through the rental place. Sean's not having a good time and I'm glad about that because he shouldn't have fallen. He shouldn't have left. He shouldn't be here. He's served the right. Okay, should we do our problems right away? It's up to you. Are you prepared for that? I, yeah, I wrote, I wrote some things now. You wrote some things down.

Do you want to go first? Is the winner? Uh, is that, well, is that the, that's the protocol usually. Oh, okay. Yeah, I like that's the protocol. Okay. I got a lot of things to bitch about.

The white boy summer starts today officially. Uh, I don't know. Johnny, did you know that? I did know that. Here, here is the, here is don't know. Johnny, did you know that? I did know that. Here is the, here's how you know. This is Elliott Pages. When the white boy summer starts when Elliott Pages posts his first topless pick of the season. Look at those abs, man. This is Elliott Pages. I don't know if I'm, for some reason, I think Elliott pages allowed to post a

topless picture of himself, but I kinda don't know if I am, allowed to reach, show it, I'm gonna do it anyway. No, you're allowed. You don't know if you're allowed to show it. There's a lot of bigots, Vido. No, you don't want any bigotry. I don't want any bigots in the trust and safety to say, well, you're showing a topless man,

and that's not allowed, like it's the 30s anymore. Yeah. Look at those abs. Do you think those abs are real? We were trying to discuss. Those abs are real. Yeah. Yeah, look at them.

There's in there's still like, I think they're still looking at implants. They're not like, they're the skin, ninja turtle, Halloween costume. That's what I was saying. God, I'm having a bad hair day. I think you went to China and got some implants. But look at these obliques too.

These are real life obliques over here. You're saying those are fake too? Listen. They'll put a little silicon pad underneath the skin, sew it in there. Here's what you're not realizing. They'll add ridges to your penis if you want them to. The Chinese can do any of your things.

For a woman, it's easy to get abs because they love starving themselves and they love doing core workouts and pilates. That's true. Easy. Any woman could get abs like a man can get enormous biceps. You understand?

They love doing the workouts. They love starving themselves. But for a man like Elliott Page, it speaks to his tenacity. It's extremely difficult for a man to get abs, especially ones that look like this. And look at this pool, man. Elliot, body, you got to clean that. You got to clean that pool. It's disgusting. Yeah. It hasn't seen chlorine in about eight years. That's some yellow pool water, are there? All right. Elliot Page is looking like the pool boy though. Maybe he'll

maybe he'll be. You know, you see him outside the pool house, you're going to keep your wife locked away. Yeah. Don't let her talk of that pool boy. What do you think they did with Elliot's tits? I think they probably donated him to, you know, like a hard rock cafe. Yeah. They're going to put them in a Lucite plastic and hang them on the wall. All right. Go ahead. That's with the problem. Please. Well, dick. That's the best way to put this. You know, there's one there's one thing that has been a problem. Yeah. And that problem is blackface. Oh, okay. But here's the thing. Just like Maddox. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. The real problem, however, it's not historical black face. It's the modern war on black face. Okay. War on black face. The war on black face has gone too far. Now we all know black face, traditionally was used to demean African-Americans black people by as a white person you dress up. Well, was it the reform and a menstrual type manner and certain ways or to characterize

them as jolly or, you know, where there are a lot of black people getting app attendance and these things going like, why would I be here? I'm so pissed off that I'm seeing something. It was setting up stereotypes for them. Okay. I think in society. Okay. But then we've obviously evolved past it. We understand now that blackface is offensive to the black community, so we avoid doing

it, right? Right. Right. But as part of that, as comedy, I know you're a comedian, I respect comedy. Comedians have played around with blackface, and what I would say is a very respectful manner that highlights how it can be racist. And you can't do that anymore. And that's a problem.

Okay. Now, ever since Black Lives Matter happened, we are now having to go back in these, what I would call tasteful Blackface representation. Like what? What's tasteful blackface representation. Like what? What's tasteful blackface? There was an episode of the Sarah Silverman show where she wore blackface. There were multiple episodes of 30 rock. Jimmy Kimmel famously as Carl Bologna on the bad show.

How about Kramer when he tanned himself and then showed up and then talked about the fork sideways up your ass. No, no, no, no, no, no. On the on the show Seinfeld when Kramer over tanned himself and he was dating that black and then showed up and then talked about putting the fork sideways up your ass. No, no, no, no, no, no. On the on the show, Seinfeld, when Kramer over-tanned himself, he was dating that black girl, and he had the incredible, he opened the door and he was all like super burnt and outrageous. I wonder if they've done anything about that episode. I don't think they have. Here's the problem is that they actually cut their cutting cream around,

but that whole show and recast Michael J Fox. They had a reshoot everything. Yeah, the new side for the Fox cut. Yeah. Yeah. Where do you watch that peacock plus? What are you over saying?

Well, I was going to say that because of the Black Lives Matter, this hyper sensitivity around these racial depictions, they've actually started removing episodes of television shows that you can no longer watch. There was three episodes of scrubs are no longer available on Hulu, five episodes of

Holy Sonny and Philadelphia. A show you think would, I mean, come on. Talk about the disappointment of the century. Those guys, those guys getting super woke. I don't know if they were, if they approved of it though, they haven't come out and apologize for it. It might be the corporate overlaid. Yeah, but they did a whole episode on like being black and like they've done multiple attempts.

They've attempted multiple times to be woke on that show. They kind of go back and it does seem like more recently now recently now. Yeah. Kind of everyone in Hollywood goes that way. I mean, it sucks because like, and there's even episodes where it's not really blackface. You know, there's the episode of community where they play Dungeons and Dragons. Oh, you know, and John dresses up as a dark elf. Yeah. And he painted all black. That's blackface.

Well, they've gotten rid of that entire episode. You can no longer watch that on either Netflix or Hulu. The office has had a scene removed. Netflix removed both British comedies, the mighty Bush and the League of Gentlemen, and not even cartoons are immune to this erasure of great blackface portrayals, adults swim, even pulled an episode of

Aqua Teen Hunger Force, where Shake is bitten by a radioactive black man. I remember that. That's a good one. That's a good episode. Well, you're is bitten by a radioactive black man. I remember that. That's a good episode. Well, you're not going to be able to find it. So Seth Rogan made those comments about how you should just be okay with comedy not being good anymore. PC anymore?

Yeah, he's like, well, you should just be okay with it being inappropriate. And that's comedians should stop bitching about how things are inappropriate and more. Wait, Seth Rogan said that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I pulled it as something to talk about this. Well, you're saying he's defending being inappropriate or he's saying he shouldn't be inappropriate. He's just saying stop complaining about jokes being inappropriate and just accept that

jokes are inappropriate. Uh, yeah, comedians shouldn't complain about cancel culture except that jokes don't age well. Yeah, comedians shouldn't complain about cancel culture, except that jokes don't age well. And the big, the real big problem with that, and I think you're touching on it. Yeah, that feels like that's a contradictory statement. No, he's saying just accept that your jokes aren't inappropriate anymore, except that there's a problem with problematic jokes.

Change your material and stop fighting for things like blackface, like what you're doing. But a big problem with it is if the funny people can't use it anymore, then only the racists are using it. It's like this hyper acceleration of anything into something that is totally, completely untouchable and toxic. It's not like you've got a mix where, It's not like you've got a mix where, it's not like you've got a mix now where you can make a couple rib bumping jokes

and then somebody takes it too far and you're like, oh, you took it a little too far. Like just dial it back. Now you've got none of the former and the guy who did not have the sense to know he was taking it too far, just taking it too far, even further and even farther. And everybody's like, no, I mean, I got nothing.

I can't stop him. Well, the other problem is that you have these guys who's like entire careers are based on being offensive, being edgy, whatever else. They've already established themselves. They've got all the money and connections. And this stuff is still funny. It hasn't stopped being funny. It's just, now you have them gatekeeping and being like, no, no, no, you can't make those

jokes. You're like, are you saying that because you don't want me to take your job? Because you know that like that's how you get in is like by making people laugh or whatever else. I mean, like Tina Fey pisses me off. That you know, she becomes, you know, a big time comedian, whatever, you know, head writer S and all this stuff was always making edgy jokes. And then, you know, all of a sudden, after she's made all the money, after the show is out of the air, she goes, as we strive to do the work and do better in regards

to race in America, we believe these episodes featuring actors and race changing makeup are best taken out of circulation. Here's the worst part. I understand now that intent is not a free pass for white people to use these images. Okay. I apologize for the pain they have caused. The intent of your comedy does not matter, sir. It does not matter that you are highlighting the absurdity of racism and how ridiculous it is in this day and age.

It doesn't matter. Still hurtful. This has gone so far. Anything to get people to not talk about their money. Yes, anything. Pitting that WEF, the World Economic Forum, that I always complain about, they're always posting stats.

Well, here's what women are making versus, oh, you guys know that you guys know that you're causing problems at home with this shit. We can't stop, you guys are paying everybody. Yeah, I have no, I have no agency over how much women are getting paid. Absolutely none. Right. You guys do. And now it's, then you, you do it and then you make stats saying how fucked up it is

to piss them off at home. So, they kill it us. Yeah. So, they kill it us. Yeah. Yeah. Dick, the war on blackface has just gone too far with that. We're even now coming at digital blackface for you.

We're at digital blackface. Is that like animal crossing? That is. Yes. It's going to make your animal crossing character black. Yeah. No, digital face. No, that is.

They had afro puffs. Yeah. I wouldn't win enough freaked out. They added a certain hairstyle to animal crossing. And if you put it on a white character, everybody on the internet yells at you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's not exactly what I'm talking about. Guys using the black thumbs up emojis, right?

Or using a reaction images of Oprah or other prominent black women to communicate sassiness or, I mean, they put it well here. It's an online phenomenon where white and non-black people share gifts and photos of black folks to express emotional reaction to anything happening on the internet those seemingly harmless the problem with digital black faces that it often reinforces negative stereotypes about black folk those stereotypes might include that they are aggressive loud sassy or simply here for your consumption and entertainment. What's your, what reaction, Giff is that?

Uh, I'm sure there's, I don't know. I don't use a lot of Giff reactions. I do. You know, because I have deep respect for the Black community and I would never perform an act of digital Blackface. Performing Blackness be it IRL or online is not an acceptable form of expressing reaction or dissatisfaction,

especially not in exchange for likes and wheat wheat wheat wheat wheat wheat wheat. Would you do blackface if you could? Yes. You would. Yes. What would you do? I think I have some ideas. What's like an idea?

I want to think about that. They're a little too complicated. But too complicated. Oh yeah. I don't even want to meta-commit there on the blackface. The point is the war on blackface has gone too far. Yeah, but would you want a chaggot the black face. The point is the war on black face. Has God do you want? Yeah, but you aren't jagged doing black face?

No, but jagged wouldn't do it. That's the thing. You can do it in a funny way. It can be funny. That office joke they caught is hilarious. Did you ever see that joke? I don't remember. They're having like the Christmas party

and Dwight's like, oh, I'm Bell Schnickle to whatever and I hit people with my whip. And they're like, that's not a real thing and they look it up andight's like, oh, I'm Bell Schneckled or whatever and I hit people with my whip. And they're like, that's not a real thing. And they look it up and they're like, he's often accompanied by his colorful imp, you know, Marka Char, who, you know, it dresses in full black. And he was like, well, you know, we're definitely not doing that. And he cuts the parking lot.

His buddy's dressed. No, again, he's got the full black face. I think it gets a tax and just gets back in his car. I think it would be more insulting if I was a black guy, it would be more, it's the most insulting stereotype would be that I'm offended by white people painting themselves with shoe polish and acting like jackass. That would be a worse stereotype that I'm offended by that. Yeah.

Then any of the things they could do, like the most menstrual thing, but we're like, well, you know what I mean? That's acting like an idiot, I guess. Is that really, I don't behave like that. What did I do sometimes? What another race stresses up as a white guy, it makes like white guy joke. It's hilarious, right? It is a white person.

I love it. Only a white woman would say, this is the biggest, this is the biggest problem for black people. Right. Okay, guys, guys stressing up like them and acting like assholes. Or posting reaction images over them, because that would be the most offensive thing

to white women. When you imitate them, like, oh, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, you. Speaking of Chaggot, I had a conversation with him the other day, did you see that? I did. On the kill stream. I feel like people should watch that one. Yeah. I'm not a normal kill stream listener, but the combination of you and Chaggot and Ralph seemed

like I needed to tune in. Chaggot for some reason told everyone that he was, that he had dated a 13 year old when he was 18. Dated. Oh yeah, a lot of fun. Sorry. And that he realized that he realizes this was a bad wrong, but it wasn't wrong,

because everyone does degenerate things. And it also, it's okay because he has autism so they were technically the same level of maturity. Yeah. He said, I mean, that is very of maturity. Yeah. He said, I mean, that is a very autistic comment. Yeah, well, there you go. Am I thinking, well, shouldn't,

doesn't that mean like you, it should make it worse? Like you have less understanding of a child, not that you are a child. Like being autistic doesn't mind his years, it makes you a robot, right? Like 13 year old boys don't act like 18 year old autistic men. The point is, the point is, the idea that an 18 year old autistic kid is,

that he can have sex with 13 year olds because they're like the same thing. I don't know. Yeah, that's the, I don't know about that argument. I think we hashed it out. Yeah, I don't think about that argument. I think we hashed it out. I don't think you guys, I think Shaggy of K-Boy disappointed from that conversation. I think you really expected you to have his back. I just, I wanted to know, feel out more of his reasoning. Okay, let's see, here's my problem.

Kid safe pride. Kid safe pride. Have you heard about this? Yes. Have you heard about this? Yes. Have you seen this movement? Do you know what pride is, Johnny? The event with the gay pride event?

Yeah. Big parade. I guess people are bringing like their, people are bringing kinky stuff, kinky stuff, dildos, stuff to indicate that there's sex happening at a gay pride event. Like, you guys have sex? Is that the new thing for them? And there's a big backlash. I saw a Voshe the idiot talking about this

and I've looked into it and there's a big deal. Making pride safe for kids. And my thinking is how much do you guys remember being gay is about having dicks in your butts, right? That's like, I don't know if that's the prime is that the prime? No, no, no, that's what it is. That's what it is. Right. When the first, that's the, the first thing I learned, that's how you explain it to a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, somebody who had never heard this concept before. Yeah. What's all this about gay? Well, it's about a Dixon to butt.

Right. That's it. There you go. That's it. Are you gay? I don't know if I'm gay. Do you like Dixon to butt? Ah! Yes or no? Yes, gay.

Gay. Do you not like it? I'm not really, it doesn't sound like my thing. Not gay. May perhaps bisexual. Not gay. Okay. Um, it annoys me for two reasons.

First of all, there's now a significant amount of energy and effort and labeling and advertising and marketing directed towards what white women want being gay to be, which is all of this, oh, this is all about sharing love and bottle. No, it's about dicks in the butt You guys have been you took dicks in the butt out to make gay marriage legal and talk all of it Did nonsense about love and blah blah? Yeah, straight marriages and about love so don't try pulling this gay marriage shit It's about love straight marriage is about dick in the pussy and Money Okay, that's what it's about. Game air just about dicks in the

butt. That's it. So, um, ster- uh, turning pride, uh, kids safe. Uh, here, let me get- Yeah, what would that entail? What do they want to get rid of? They want to get rid of anything that could indicate sex is happening or any kind of kinks or anything like that? Ironically, they're okay with that kind of stuff, but they want you to keep it in the bedroom. That is their message. That is the woke message to the gay community. We like your kinks. We're sexually forward thinking, but keep it in the bedroom.

Don't let us see it. Don't let us see it, which sounds awfully familiar to me, having grown up in the 80s and the 90s. I have no problems with gay people. Just keep it in the bedroom. Yeah. Just don't want to see it in the bedroom. Just don't hold hands in public This is what they did. This is what they did to us. There is no straight pride parade where it can just be a bunch of Topless hoars running around

Celebrating and we can all celebrate being straight because they sanitize our entire lives for children And I don't want that to happen to our gay brothers Does that make more sense? No, I totally agree with you. Let me pull out this quote. The idea that we have to sanitize, like they've already corporatized pride. Like I remember we went, it's like a bunch of floats with like Chase bank logo's on them and shit.

And like wow, this sucks. It's just being taken over by this sanitized corporate. People who don't have sex. Yeah, dickless people. Right. Can't stick anything in a butt. Kink at pride makes people uncomfortable and makes the event less accessible

when accessibility should be a priority. Why? Shouldn't the priority be about dicks in the butt? Let's keep less family friendly stuff to the many, many after parties and adjacent private venues every pride has. The fact that this is controversial is insane to me. Pride should be a cool, queer friendly block party

that you can attend to meet with organizers and get cute shirts. Oh my God. Every, this is like a networking event now. They're taking the sexuality out of everything and trying to force it about identity and trying to force it into being about your identity when it is not. You know what I'm saying? As a straight man, it's not like I think about that. I think about how I'm straight, a small percentage of the day. Yeah. And the rest is spent on the shit that defines me, right?

Yeah, you don't spend all day being like, oh, I'm part of the straight community. And this is my straight experience. Uh-huh. And they're trying to, you're straightness to. What's down to, I enjoy fucking women. Yes. Yeah. Um, but you can't do that if you're gay now.

They don't want you to focus on the erotic aspect. They just want you to wear a rainbow t-shirt And I'm tired of flag of kids ruining everything. Yes The family the family friendly Vegas sucks family friendliness in general women Mothers should be driving their children from home to school in a constant state of panic that it's gigantic erection is going to flop into view that a woman is going to have her top ripped off and go running down the street going, it should be she should have one hand on the wheel and one hand over her kids eyes because that is the world we live in is there to get to for those because of those goddamn kids and I will be damned if I let those same women mothers do this to the pride parade.

Um, can't we just force kids to wear burkas until they turn like 25? It should be illegal to take them out of the home. Yeah. It should be illegal to take you should be. There's no harm. What do you can? No, just like bars. Oh, can you take, can you take kids in that bar?

No. Nobody wants your kids anywhere Nobody wants nobody wanted you to have kids fuck you for having them You should have to pay a penalty for having them actually. Oh, can I bring kids to your party? No Why would I want why would I want that? Why would in no one no one on earth has ever said, oh yeah, bring your kid. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it.

Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it.

Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it.

Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. I love doing a crisis mental inventory of what things. I have sharp objects and dildos that I have that cannot be seen. Dismissing accessibility as sanitization is a really underhanded and disgusting strategy. If you want something more spicy, blah, blah, blah, people claiming this is about the woke left

trying to co-opt the gay experience, identity, or whatever, and use it to cram their politics down everyone's throat. Always annoys me the lie about who you are and what you want to do so that we can trick people into hanging around you annoys me always. No. You can't use that to slur and do that. Why? Well, because we want to trick people into going to your business. We want to trick people into patronizing the business of a racist to keep so you can stay. So you can, that's why we're going to require you to not, to not act in

the way that you want. Yeah. There you go. That's my, that's my problem. Kids safe pride. Just kids in general. Yeah. Kids in general. You got to narrow it down, but it's always about ruining something for the kids. Yeah, for the kids. And who's be hast?

Why can't you buy vapes? Cause some dumb kid bought some from China and vaped it too hard and it gets sick. And by the way, teen smoking a skyrocketing now. Oh, because they can't get the veins. Yeah, they're buying cigarettes. Uh-huh. Good.

Good. I hope they all fucking get lung cancer and die. Because that's what you get when you write these stupid fucking laws. Okay, what is your next problem? My next problem is, I don't know about you dick when I go out. Anytime I have to leave my house or I'm outside of my house and I have to use someone else's toilet, it's a nightmare.

You know why? Because they don't have a bidet. Oh yeah, true. America's resistance to the bidet is becoming a problem. Yeah. Now I have a bidet, it has changed my life. Okay. Incredibly.

Yeah. You ever take a shit? All right. And you gotta walk. I've taken a shit. Yeah, you've taken a shit. We've all done this, we've all seen this. Okay. But you ever take one of those shits and you just keep wiping and it never stops.

Yeah. You just wipe it. You're like, how, how is there any poo plop? That's a poo plop. That's a poo plop. That's a poo plop. I've been wiping for an hour. And then you think you're done, you get up 20 minutes later, your butthole starts to

itch. You're like, how did anything escape from the, listen, you get the bidet? Is that what that itch means? Yeah, it means that you got a little poopoo left there. Sorry, something's tickelin' around. But you wouldn't have this problem if you were livin' the lifeline livin'. You get a simple bidet, you attach it to your toilet,

you blast a shot of pressurized water up your butthole. It is the gravellin' of a picture, right? I'm not, here's a part of gravity for my bond. No, but I do like to bring facts and figures to the bar. I would not, yeah, here's a part of Grappling from my phone. No, but I do like to bring faction figures to make sure. I would like, I have a bidet too. I would like it to have like a web component so you could, I could target, you know? Like a little movement around, yeah.

I wanna get one of the ones with the like heats the water. I mean, the Japanese, of course, have embraced this technology. I got my dad one of those for Christmas. He threw a big fit because he'd have to hire somebody to install it. Some of all the heat. No, there's no, oh, the he'd have to hire somebody to install it. It's all the key. No, there's no the heated ones.

I was like, it was the night top of the line. $700 per day. Well, the thing is, man, people don't realize that the bidet is fantastic. I feel like this is the metric system where Americans are just like, I don't want to change how I go to the toilet. I'm not going to use no fancy European numbers. Why do you think, why do you evolve people think you have an opinion on the metric system? What do you do that's in measuring in any possible way

and yet you are sure you have the right to take on the fucking metric system? Same American pigheadedness. Oh, anything foreign. I don't want to deal with those French. I don't even want their fries anymore. I'm gonna eat freedom fries. Okay, no

Sometimes the Europeans and the Asians have it all fucking figured out, okay Stop fighting them on everything. Why do you think the metric system is better? I hear this all the time from people who don't 12's it's 10 base 10 no it was no it started in base six It started in base It's way hang out with the fucking are a make-ins It's way easier to divide 12 by two and two again or by three and four Then it is to divide 10 by the same number of things. Oh, okay. Yeah. Go wet your ass with a fucking rock you cave man Look build me I want you to build me a desk using 10. I want you to make a system. Okay, go to fucking home deep bones, I'd like,

I'd like a point one, point one kilometers a kilometer of wood. A decimeter of wood, please. Listen, man, in the same way. Let the studs in your house. I don't understand why you're fighting me on this. The point is, mother fucker. I just love every time, every time someone

who has nothing to do with measuring says, there's nothing to do with measuring. Just like how we don't. I measure shit, okay? I tell you, I've never measured anything. But you really want it to be in what I mean. I look at the mirror, I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror.

I have the option and you use the centimeter side. I take some time, mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror.

I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror.

I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. I look at the mirror. You know, you're trying to switch topics because you know it'll make me look bad. Look, the point is not only is the day fantastic for your fucking asshole you asshole. The scientists here use the correct system. Oh, okay, it is. It's good for them. Yeah. Construction doesn't regular people doesn't because the foot's like the size of your fucking foot That's why okay, that makes sense. Yeah, cuz I use my actual feet to measure shit people do people

They should step that's what's hardest stepping step things off all the time. Oh my god All right, now my problem is people insist that the metric system is not worth people who insist that the metric system is not worth this way. Why is it worth it? Why is it worth it? Why is it worth it? I don't know why American craftsmanship that much better than anywhere else in the world. Yes.

What is German precision engineering, the Japanese? I don't know why you're absolutely. Why do you think Japan is able to miniaturize everything? You know what, I'll tell you why. You know what, I'll tell you why. Our giant clumsy feet and then they shrink it down to this perfect little bite size clock radio that fits on your hand. That's a fits on your wrist.

I think America is bigger. Yeah. Our system grows harder and America just let the right system, let whatever better system win better system. Let the better system win. They didn't do that in Europe. They said, well, this makes sense to us, Brainiacs. You don't measure things by the way. This is eyeballing it. This is just classic American pig-headed

niche. Look, 60% of Japanese households have a bidet. 90% of Venezuelan households have a bidet. It has increased health benefits. 90%? 90%. That's what they say. Increased health benefits, you don't get as much damage skin or hemorrhoids of course. Oh really it's decreases hemorrhoids? Oh yeah absolutely. Oh wow. Oh that's...

A lot of hemorrhoids are from like rough thing, you know like too hard wiping back there. Too hard to wipe. Yeah well you'll like rupture some shit if you're really grabbing at the back of your ass. Do you? Are you wiping your head? I mean you know, you grab the sandpaper and really get in there.

Do you remember that time in our shared history where every asshole had to tell you the secret of using like those fucking moist wipes and then finishing it off with some toilet paper? Which is, I don't think that's helpful. I don't think I never understood that. I mean, we just had to sit through that conversation multiple times.

Really? Oh, God, why do I have to hear about this again? I don't have to hear about this. I mean, I don't have to hear about this. I mean, I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again.

I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again.

I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don't have to hear about this again. I don of toilet paper annually in this country. Okay. Switching to bidets could save 15 million trees. Oh, wow. Making a single roll of toilet paper, shut the fuck up, requires 37 gallons of water.

People say a bidet waste water, 37 gallons to make one roll of toilet paper. Oh, I see. So Elon Musk can't shut this one down because it does save it saves it's say it's conserves not to mention toilet paper can clog pipes and creates a significant load onto city sewer systems and water treatment plants. The point is I like to everything about the bidet is better. I like to bidet off the tip of my dick when

I'm done jerking off to. Well, there's all sorts of fun stuff you can do it. Why I don't want to wipe them. They say women if you get a lot of UTIs you can you know blast your Blast your area Well calming the stream of water and Help out there. It has all sorts of help I don't know Blast your area. I'm just her in blast your area You don't say that to a girl right before you go to town. Make sure you blast your area.

Things are going to get hot tonight. I tell her, I'm going to blast your area tonight, baby. Oh, I'm not going to do that. It's going to get blasted. Oh, no. Stop fearing the bidet bidet bidet. Fear is my problem, Dick. It's unwarranted.

I wanted Vatics to bring in the imperial system, whatever ours is. Yeah, so you kind of used me as a stand-in for the Hollywood adventure. You really, uh, because I'm not even that passionate about that. I know, but you know what I'm a liar. I'm a stand-in. Like, on Reddit, everyone's like, oh, yeah, I mean, it's like how the US does it. So it's like, why do you think that what is missing in your life that you're not using fucking meters and liters?

Like go to a bar and ask for a liter and a half of beer instead of a pint. Go for it, go nuts, no one's, nothing stopping you. I gotta pull down a rabbit hole on that one in over my head. Okay, I should measure more things and then I'll know. Build me anything and use your fucked system. I can build more things and then I'll know. Build me anything. Use your fucked system. I can build some stuff. It doesn't matter. I mean, it doesn't matter which

side you use for like a small project. Go do it then. I imagine. I imagine there's some benefits the metrics just might have to look it up. Okay. Mine. I think the main benefits is conversion across. Well, conversion. Well, the conversion from across leaders to feet and stuff like that. Yeah, also just to set a standard worldwide. Fat brain is my problem, is my final problem. Yes. We'll just sub fat brain.

And this is a woman who has determined This is a woman who has determined that blood pressure cuffs are cheating the data. And that's why fat people have high blood pressure because it's the cuffs are too small and not made for... This is fat brain in action. I've got... I brought in a couple examples of fat brain. Yeah, I know what you're talking about. Today I learned that, today I learned that because they're designed for thin people,

blood pressure cuffs are simply inaccurate for fat bodies. That was her term, not mine, although she might have meant it as fat bodies instead of the pejorative fat bodies. And the false measurements skew in the direction of bias. So like, oh yeah, she understood this study. So who knows if weight has any connection to blood pressure at all? Who knows? Who can possibly know is it's because the cuffs see it's because the cuffs, you know, they can't fit their fat in the cuff. So they're getting black, bad blood pressure reading. Yeah, I'm not sick.

It's that the world hasn't designed its equipment to accommodate someone. I wish I could get any doctor to believe this. It also reminded me. It also reminded me, and this is another, this is a pig responding. I wish I could get any doctor to believe this. It also reminded me how when my doctor asked me to get

a home blood pressure monitor for the hypertension I was diagnosed with solely based on my high blood pressure when taken in office. I had to explain that I couldn't find a cuff big enough for my arm. Okay, that's just incorrect. That's not true. Even in the men's sizes, Vida. Yeah, they make cuff. I wish I could get any doctor that she would possibly be.

What are you talking about? Have you seen my 600 pound life? Yeah, but is that a 600 pound lady? Mine as well, baby. And even that, I'm sure you can find a specialty cuff. They still check your blood pressure, even if you're gigantic. Um, wait a minute.

So this is fat people who just rather than accepting that they're fat and unhealthy. Fat brain, right. We'll let you pull any reason possible why there's, why there's, there's nothing wrong with you. Yeah, there are against you. They don't understand that you're actually very healthy. This equipment is systemically rigged, right, to give high blood pressure, diagnoses.

What about the test of climbing up the stairs? How's that one? Are the stairs systematically? They don't understand that fat people, we need stairs that are at a certain incline. That it would be fine. That I wouldn't get winded after five of them. Here's my other example of fat brain.

This is a woman commenting on attraction and who you are allowed to be attracted to Here we go. Let's listen to this. It's only a minute long she got winded by the end and had to stop the broadcast Hey, bestie You are wrong. Oh god. I think it's time for another adult pre-K lesson. What do you think? Turn your listening ears on. Okay. She baffling your mouth. Good job. Okay. Here's the thing. Gotta hate teachers.

Having a preference is something right. So she's responding to somebody who said, oh, he isn't attracted to bigger girls. Like how some people aren't attracted to smaller girls. Oh, yeah. That's why women think they're really funny, you know? Yeah, it's like really obnoxious. He isn't attracted to bigger girls, you know, kind of like how a lot of guys aren't attracted to thin girls. Yeah, right.

Same thing. He goes exactly the same. You hear that all the time. Right. Everyone is entitled to their own preferences. Well, here's what she's, that's what she's saying is wrong. Here you go. Like, I'm looking for a partner who likes kayaking or wakes up early in the

morning or. As a healthy BMI. You're finding big enough kayaking. You ask a, you ask this fat lady, um, name a form of exercise. Uh, uh, kayaking. Yeah, one of those top five. Okay. Survey says. Love's pizza.

But when your preferences exclude an entire group of marginalized people, that's problematic. Okay, that's not a preference. If you lump all fat people in one group together as though they are not, you're going to be very different individuals. Here comes. That's fat phobic. Just like lumping all black people in one group

and saying, I don't like black people is racist. And lumping all disabled people in one group and saying, I don't think people in wheelchairs are hot. Is that you, Liz? Do you understand what I'm saying? Yeah. Dick is a member of the fat community, I disowned this woman and her opinions.

Well, have you ever struggled with fat brain? Yeah, I mean, you make little, you make little justifications here and there. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's my problem. Yeah. Just because of those threads, I guess.

Fat people believe that they suffer as, but it's similar to the discrimination historically faced by as marginalized communities as the African American community. Yeah. You see a lot of cops shooting fat people. That's fatty. Well, did you get that sandwich, fatty? It's actually a gun. It's a wrap.

It's a wrap. A cop's love fat people because they know, hey, you're not going to run and be if you do run, it's going to. Uh, cops love fat people because they know, hey, you're not going to run and be if you do run, it's going to be fucking hilarious. They're good. They're going to just go to the nearest hometown buffet. They're just going to jog beside you. Like, you're done, buddy.

He's still trying to get away. They're ruckus. Like, oh, he's getting away. Like, don't worry. There's a hometown buffet about six blocks that way. We're just, let's, we'll hop in up on the dumpster and then, right? We'll hide behind the soup with some tasers and get there.

Okay, so go vote on the problems again. Somebody was, everyone, I'm sorry that there's no down voting. Fuck, and you have to log into Patreon. Sorry about that. I think I could deal. Okay, let's see what else I have here to complain about. And ignore Dix, a metric system sidebar. Really tried to nail me on that one.

How long you to put a TED tag together? I'm gonna tell you how the average person's life would be improved by using a metric system. I think it's an international thing. If you try to order stuff from another country, it's a lot. What are you ordering? I don't know.

Do you want shirt sizes and metric shirts? This is a small is a one. There's no standard as real clothing sizes anyway. Oh, comments. Critical thinking. I just watched the episode that Dick was pissed off that people had to sign a declaration, I think he means, in a government job that they were not allowed to boycott Israel. It's actually quite hilarious.

I bet it's not. Quite hilarious to see how his tune has changed now for some reason, because I got Bar Mitzvah. His arguments here are as pathetic as his argument preparing a stickman drawing to Lollicon. Can I bear it. Have to say Vito was a pleasant surprise. What the fuck is going on? This guy from Vietnam or something.

I don't know how sure what you mean by that. Vito was a president on show. He did not talk over people like he has done before and made the show quite enjoyable. Yeah, I gotta shut up more. That's stickman thing, really. I don't see what the difference is. Oh, stick man and like writing it out with words.

Well, that's the question. And you're like, Oh, no, he took my drawing. I'm still imagining it. What are you gonna do now? At what point is you're drawing, you know, you're gonna have a sit in. All the lollies are gonna go sit in at Congress and have a, when all of it's illegal, they're gonna have a sit in and think about it. And then what? It's just confusing. It's like a one point is a drawing so good that you're like, oh, now it's pornography. Because if it is a stick figure, it's like, I can't be upset about that.

Maybe I've said about any of your good at drawing and it kind of looks like an actual thing. You can't, you can't be upset about any of it. And by that, I mean, here is a fucking chilling stat that I wanted to talk about last show. Let me see here. This is how many hours. I was going to bring this in as a problem, but this is kind of a looser version of that show. So this is how many hours the average person had to work to buy one share of the S&P 500

for the entire 50s, 60s, 70s, and most of the 80s, and now in all of the 80s, it was under 40 hours a week, bouncing between, bouncing between, bouncing between five and 40. So the average person would have to work anywhere from, and it was probably half a week, yeah, 40 hour a week, week on average, right? Our parents, our parents, Gen X parents, millennial parents, and yeah, Gen X and millennial parents.

So boomers and silent generation, they had to work a half a week to be able to invest in a single unit of the stock market, right? The stock market is, it is a casino that you have to participate into retire. Like that's your retire right? That is, that is the American dream investing in it. Since the dream is gambling at all, I'm a thing you can't predict. Since the 90s. Well, you'll be allowed to survive as a person. His skyrocketed up to, I checked today, it was 137 hours. So our labor, anyone who grew up in the 90s and beyond,

the value of your labor on average is six times less than your parents. So if anybody's asking why millennials don't just get a job, the no matter what the dollar sign is, this is what it means for your retirement. Like this is what it means for the actual value of your worth when compared with the market as a whole, which is not half a week to buy a single share, but 120 hours

at three days. Yeah. Wait. A three weeks. Three weeks. So almost a month. It takes you three weeks to get the same bank for your buck. It takes three weeks for you to work.

So paying the same amount of the market. Yeah. For you to work for the same piece size of the, of America that it took your parents half a week, half a week, yeah. Three days. If you're worried about anything, my point is if you're worried about anything, lollie, whatever, and is not that single solitary figure, you're wasting your time. That is, that is your life, flushing down the fucking drain.

That's single graph. Let me pull it up. What are you going to say? Well, they always try to distract, I mean, it's anything. I mean, like even like the ongoing, the racial stuff, you're like, yeah, this is all terrible. And I totally agree with all of it. But ultimately, they always wanted to strike you away

from the economic aspects, the economic arguments. They love the weeks. They love that people are sitting around going. The real problem in this country is race. They always wanted to strike you away from the economic aspects, the economic arguments. They love the weeks. They love that people are sitting around going, the real problem in this country is race, race, race. Yeah, and you're like, no, that's, no, that's, they want you to think that, they want you to constantly talk about that. That's why the media is talking about it every fucking day of the week.

Because otherwise, they might report on this shit. I'm glad you're all here for the George Floyd Memorial. No, we're having a drag bankers into the street day. As it turns out, that's what George Floyd would have wanted. Well, then we're going to have the FBI come in the assassin. The mind crash. Yeah, of course. Oh, okay.

What else? Critic, thank you, critical thinking. Valerie Kelsey, Pokemon card scalping is history repeating itself. We were the direct victims of adult scalping beanie babies. And we were kids. Now we heard Pokemon cards. How about that? The cycle of violence continues.

We're kids into beanie babies though. I felt like that was always like, I don't know. I don't know. I really cared about beanie babies. Yeah, I think you're right. It seemed like there's more adults who are like, yeah, these are like super rare.

It was like moms and like kids. And I can give a fuck about beanie babies. Yeah, I always cared about Pokemon. I remember as who are like, yeah, these are like super rare. It was like moms and like kids. You didn't give a fuck about beanie baby. Yeah, I always cared about Pokemon. I remember as a kid like they're like, oh, there's gonna be beanie babies in the happy meals or whatever, and I was like, yeah, I know some kids have a couple of those, I guess. The gentleman sausage, pronoun resistance is the biggest

problem because people are choosing to lose. It costs literally nothing to just be they them and then you win. Yeah, I mean, people have played. I still don't understand the definition of win. I don't know. It's like men are better than women. Like, and no one has ever asked me, what do you mean by better?

And then I just got all fun. I honestly, I don't know. You know what? It's fun to say. I mean, just fuck with me. That's pretty much the way. Maybe that's why I came in deadline. Coconut Steve says, dude, I'm poor.

Thankfully, I live in a compact semi-urban area that's fairly bicycle-friendly, which allows me to sacrifice a superfluous vehicle in exchange for silly little things like food and shelter. I'm not trying to be a public nuisance. I'm just trying to go to work and get by. Lay off the fucking bicycle hate, man. I don't know what that was directed at, honestly. Well, that was like an old thing, right? That was a brand new comment. Yeah, but I'm saying, I know one of your old shows

was complaining about bikers or an iron. I mean, I do complain about bikes. Well, you don't hate bicycles who are like, you know, stated a sidewalk and don't bother anybody. No, I hate them all. I hate them all. Yeah. If you own a bicycle, you're fucked.

Yeah. Oh, shut up. No, you don't. Uh, some, I used to be a bicycle. I used to bike to work every day. It was great. Horrible. I stayed out every way.

Hey, Dick, Asher is what we call in Hebrew a homo mass reage. A smelly, I don't know what that means. A smelly reel. Yeah, that's what he says. Like, golem. What I was born in Israel here. And I was he was born in Israel here and lived here a whole two months in two thousand. Oh, okay. What a fucking hero. It's as if he was almost on all the nine 11 flights. He was lucky.

I was almost the pilot. It's good one. He was lucky. He was almost the pilot. That's good one. He was lucky enough to get out of here and not have to worry about teaching his kids why they hear alarms and need to go into shelter whenever Abdulla or whoever the fuck down south wants his people to die in vain and still has the audacity to pretend that he knows anything about any of this. We have mandatory army service here, something he avoided being the smelly Eft slur he is by leaving the country, some of which fought in Gaza and some who were fighter pilots that actually bombed it.

Let me key you in on their directives going over to bomb homos bases and shit. Hey guys, don't shoot kids. We don't want anything We don't gain anything from shooting kids. That's what they tell the fighter pilots just make sense This shit's never gonna end and I care about resolving it as much as you do other than actually trying to take care of the safety of my family Who's affected by it? We're gonna keep winning But idiots like Asher just infuriate me and they should go get some hummus, shove it up their ass and use it as lube for the Palestinian dick they love so much. Go fuck yourself and snoutch us for Johnny, John and Vito, lahiam. Joseph who's actually in Israel and experienced being bombed you fucking dipshit.

Oh, these are really prospective there. I guess that would kind of a passionate people. It's got some colorful, colorful language. Yep, yep. Oh, more about, more about Israel, huh? Oh, really? People had strong opinions on Israel. That's it. That's the thing. Again, never seen it. People in America, like sell up, oh, they're taking it, they're taking our tax doll. Yeah. I mean, they're pretty much all the tax dollars getting wasted. I don't know why today you're upset about those. Right. They're all just getting burnt. They all didn't need it to be collected anyway.

They could have just printed more money, but that would deflate. That would make the rich people's money worth less. So instead, they set up this elaborate system to fuck over dad and take his money and fuck him over and feed it to the rich guys. I don't, oh, and Israel has something to do with it. Oh, you know, let's say, all right, let me see who else we got.

Does anybody want to call in today? Hashtag free pal, that don't really care. There's a ceasefire though, right? So it's up to time. It's fine now. Yeah, okay, ready, ready. Ready, ready, ready. Oh, it's only one right now.

Wow. Traditional cup, IT guys make me rage so hard. Michael Critein was spot on when he described the IT guy in Jurassic Park as a lady greedy, sloppy fuck up who just diddled around for hours before screwing up the entire park. I've known an IT guy to actually get something, I've never known an IT guy to get something done. Every single one I've worked with always follows this pattern, poke around with shit that's not really broken, break the fuck out of it, spend weeks trying to fix it, but mostly sitting around, fucking awful, getting paid.

And when you finally lose your shit on them, the best they'll do is a convoluted patchwork, massive wires and monitors that looks like hell and runs like shit. Yeah, it's only a matter of time before he cuts the, oh, he was in something about an unhygienic slava. Well, I don't know, IT guys. Yeah, I haven't dealt with an IT guy in a while.

At a no, my company is issuing work phones to everyone that doesn't already have one. And what makes me a rage is all the incessant bitching from boomer co-workers that want to continue to use their personal phones. Just shove the company phone in a drawer, keep using your personal phone and shut the hell up. Or better yet, just retire already.

Yeah, I guess that would be enough. Now what would you complain about getting our free phone on top of your phone? I don't understand that. Always a problem. Just need something to complain about. Detective Jarvis, people guessing the gender of your unborn child.

We're not gonna know till birth, but people say the following to my wife, your face isn't as fat as last time. It must be a boy. Are you? You sneezed a lot yesterday, so it's definitely a girl. Yeah. Same person again, but with a bunch of people agreeing

with them this time. Well, when the sun was in the east, you quieft before breakfast. Whoa, but burped after breakfast. You slept on your right side last night, but the sun gave you a new freckle and you looked tired today, so it's gotta be a boy, even though it was a girl. Last week.

People just making guesses. Yeah. You just summoned the tree witch and have her dream the nightmare of it. If only women didn't get so fat, yeah. And they could just get be pregnant and do the whole thing without like a pie. They could just put it in a pod. You know, they're doing that. I can't wait for that. You see they grew a deer in a bag. Really? Yeah, so they can make artificial looms right now. Yeah, it's gonna be for like kids who born premature,

you take them and you immediately jam them in a womb bag. Okay. Yeah, there's a video if you want to watch it. Not to like, I gotta see you're like, I gotta, I gotta, it's great. It's great, I can't be to watch it. No, I feel like I'm going to see you really. I got it. It's great. It's great, I'm going to see it. I like half-formed zero just arriving around in a plate.

It's like a see-through bag. You can see what it's going on. I want to feel, I mean, obviously, obviously that's got to be bad for the baby. We don't have to, I don't have to even care about that. Let's just have, let's just stick the stupid people's babies in the pods so they can get out and start collecting welfare and eating bugs. This is the future that I'm happily gunning for now. Well, you're going to have a pod in your house.

They actually have mockups where you'll be able to watch your baby grow and like pour bugs into a funnel so the kid can eat them in the womb. And then you can just have hundreds of them. Yeah. Oh, that's wonderful. But I baby pods and around your apartment. Let me see what else I got here. Get vaccinated or lose your job.

That's Steve and put chemicals in the water to make them gay before he comes out. I want a gay son. The anti-vacars. Oh, it looks like they deleted. Oh, did you see the Amazon suicide pod? Yes. Let me see. I think I saw you posted. I bring that up. They deleted their, oh, they deleted the tweet about it. They deleted the whole video about it.

Yeah, because what the hell? Oh, you're insane. So Amazon, if you're going to have to see the fun, Amazon made a, you know how we impress releases now, like they have to say so and so has teamed up with like the ultimate in pod making has teamed up with mindfulness expert to bring you the Amazon wellness booth called Amazon, Amazon wellness booth called Amazon, Amazon, Amazon wellness booth, which was basically a jerk off. It's this little tiny closet to go in and sob because you work at an Amazon warehouse.

It's a closet in the middle of an Amazon warehouse where you could go be on the computer. And I think they had it locked down to only let you do mindfulness. Exercise is there a computer in there? Yeah, there was a computer. You like sit down and like how should you do like a little Zen, whatever the hell? Unless you work on your breathing. Right. And then there's a drawer with a revolver in one bullet. Also, I'm pretty sure.

The Zen booth, a key part of the Working Well program is Amazon, a meditation and mindfulness initiative provided to Amazon warehouse employees via the computer in the Zen booth, like the fucking bat mobile, everything in the Zen, the Zen booth. During shifts, employees can visit Amazon stations and watch short videos featuring easy to follow well-being activities, including guided meditations, positive affirmations. The entire booth just goes black, and it just blinks, oh, pay it you for an hour.

Calming scenes with sounds, so like a screensaver? Yeah. Like just the Windows logo's lying around. Flying toasters going past. And so much more, the company said in aver, like just the Windows logo's lying around. Flying Toaster's going past. And so much more, the company said in a statement, but internet users are responding. We're quick to criticize the Zen booth. Yeah, I mean, like if you're good now,

it's something maybe be like, oh, we're gonna pay everybody a little mark as we're a bajillion dollar company. Not, we built one box where you can watch videos. We built a suicide booth that says, that taunts you on the outside with the promise that something in this booth could deliver you out of what is certainly obesity triggered depression. As though anything magic with the constant reminder that absolutely nothing can save you from the hell that is

your life that could possibly be in this magical booth unless it is a time machine or something that would just squish you or poison you the second you stepped in. Yeah, a little blue gas releases into the booth inducing a calmness in the in the occupant. How as they lose motor function and their brain shuts down, however, I didn't bliss. How out of touch would the person who worked on this have to be with not like specifically Amazon workers, but just work in general?

Like, any, as though any manual or physical labor job like any as though any manual or physical labor job in the history would be at all bettered or ameliorated by a fucking blue booth in the middle of your job site that you could go sit in and watch mindfulness tutorials. Finded meditation. Don't as your back feel like it's gonna fucking break because you're loading dildos and sex dolls into cardboard boxes all day. Why don't you come in here and get scolded? Get scolded by a soft British voice who made more than you did today, producing this

fucking video. And you can't even play solitaire on the fucking place. You can't even play solitaire on it. Or look at pornography. Couldn't you just get them like a cooler beer and like a nice outdoor patio to like relax, take a load off. Just hire more guys. Fucking booth.

Stop running articles and you're the newspaper that you also own about how much money the stock market like anything. Amazon, I get to do what I love. Who the fuck? According to Amazon, the Zen booths, here we go. I get to do what I love. It's a brand.

It's a brand box. It's onto a conveyor belt. She's a, I think this is the woman that created it. Oh, good. She's a psychopath. She enjoys, she gets to torture the, uh, I get to do what I love. Torture the underclass with my maniacal inventions. According to Amazon, the Zenbuz is a brainchild of employee, Lila Brown.

Originally knives would come out of random intervals because I really wanted to hurt people, but we decided this was much better. The workplace health and safety program manager for Amazon. At Amazon, I get to do what I love. Every day, I get to use my knowledge and skill set to work with creative people to create something great for employees. Oh, nailed it. Fucking nailed it. I'm working on a wrist band that jabs you with needles every time you start to feel sleepy. So your employees can work for 16 hours at a time. We introduce calming collars that people,

their metal collars, they put on and they tie you, they're linked to your work station. So you don't have to get all confused about where you're going. And if you get too far away, it starts to vibrate and heat up. So you know you've done something wrong. And it will explode if you lead the promises,

which serves as an excellent reminder to the other employees, just stay at their designated work station. Let's see. American Airlines investigating a pilot who opposes his school districts, critical race theory plan. I can't trust that man to fly a play. Of course not. You got a problem with the way your school is teaching your children. No, well, that's no kind of pilot that we want to have in American airlines. That really determines your ability to keep that thing in the air. Oh, what a disaster. You might be thinking racist thoughts and get so distracted that you slam it into

a mountain. You might be thinking about the amount of anti-racism that's on the rise might upset you. That's true. You're flying. That's what this is. Maybe the least racist pilots are the worst ones because they're too busy thinking about, you know? Yeah, the struggle.

All right, did I have, we can just do voicemails. Did anyone want to call in? I know, I forgot his name. Isaac wanted to call in, but I like usual. People say they want to call in and they don't show up. Uh, Yolteau, pal D.P. my old-ass, tweaker hippie neighbor won't use weed killer on her weeds. Instead, she sprays them with vinegar.

She swears by it, even though it hasn't been fucking working. It smells like, oh, smells like vinegar outside for a month because she treats her yard every morning and afternoon. You know what they do in this neighborhood? They use like, they're washing, they're closed washing machine. Yeah. To put in the yard. Wait, they put their closed washing machine outside?

No, they just pipe the water out there. Oh. Save the water. Okay. Okay. Cool. Yeah. Yeah, what was that helpful?

I mean, instead of what, flushing down into water, how much are we saving here? What do you guys, did you need the flowers? The environment, man. Yeah, anyway, all right, everybody. Go vote at the problems, patreon.com slash the dick show, Vito, where can they go to find you? patreon.com slash the Vito show.

Okay, see you next Tuesday. I don't know if Sean is coming back next Tuesday or I'll have to find it next week or not. I guess we'll find it. We might have to do a we might have to do a third boys. I don't know. Let's do vice-pounds. I'll find out.

Presenting. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.

Hey. Hey. Oh. Hey, Vic, Fish on. I'm a couple weeks behind. I just get into the part of one of these episodes where this alpha in-cell is calling in. And I'm listening to him and like, this guy can't even interact in a positive way with women to try to fuck them. Anything he's going to survive and thrive in some post-apocalyptic nightmare and go on a ramp, a killing rampage. This guy can't even talk to a chick. Anything she's gonna fucking kill a guy.

Yeah. He's right, he has retarded. He's not just a little autistic. He's fucking autistic. If there was a poster child for modern day Afburgers, this fucking retard would be it. Wow, cheese. They're dead.

That's all I got. Anyway, go for it. Was there an Ensel Klamon, he was gonna take over? He was like really pissed off and then he was like, a lot of people who are want a doomsday world are not suited for a doomsday world. Yeah, but they want it and they think that their skills would be really would serve them well in a doomsday world. Yeah. I don't think really that they would. Like no, brooding. I mean,

pretty much just engineers would survive psychopaths and engineers. It would be a lot like today's world. That's who would success. That's right. Whoever's got the most healthy kids and you train them to kill, I always thought that was the best survival strategy. Oh yeah. You have like 10 kids, all those guys get like 10 kids and the doomsday peruppers with a bunker. I'm like, wow, if anything goes down,

I mean, they're gonna win. You attend Pharaoh wolf children storming your house to take all your shit. What are you gonna do? I don't understand the doomsday, people like, just, I mean, how do you, what's your plan here? You just camping? Yeah, well, yeah, it's gonna be an extended fun camping thing,

except, you know, they have a bunch of guns, so they're gonna murder anybody who gets near them. Okay. And eat their 10,000 jars of canned beans, they have a shelter. The only thing you need and the only thing you need to prep is just a mountain of cocaine. Yeah.

Because whoever, if you, if you can stay up, the less you sleep in a doomsday world, the more dangerous you are, right? If I can stay up, if I can stay up for seven days straight, I own LA. Just get on a fucking sick ass one and do damage. Obviously, how, what's your doomsday plan? I'm gonna wait till I feel sleepy at night, and I'm gonna do a shit load of cocaine.

And then that's when the murdering begins, that night. You've seen that Jim Baker guy, the televanjulus, who sells his Rapture buckets full of perishable foods. No. He's got, he's, he's one of those guys, he was like a scammer back in the day. He went to jail for taking everybody's money and now he's back doing the exact same thing. I don't understand why Christians just fall for it all over again. But his big grift is he does the show and he goes, listen, the rapture's coming. What happens? I mean, some of you guys are going to be stuck here. So you're going to need this bucket of cornmeal. They selling it, you know, it's like dry foods, Listen, the rapture's coming. What happens? I mean, some of you guys are gonna be stuck here.

So you're gonna need this bucket of cornmeal. They sell it at, you know, it's like dry foods, but you sell it for like three times, whatever it normally costs. Didn't Tim pool sell that shit? You're gonna sell in Doomsday proper buckets and whatever else? Probably, man, they're all the buzz.

Yes, survivalist stuff. He's like, look at this cheesy potato rice. You and your family are going to be eating good when God's ripping people off the earth, flanging them into the sky. There's some people in the discord I saw talking about, like silver, buying solid silver, because it will in a doomsday scenario. What? What are you going to do with silver, make arrowheads? No, that's they think it's going to be like that's going to be a trade. I don't know. Where you go? Why don't you just get a bunch of beads? Maybe you know, what are you going to go back

to? Yeah, toilet paper is going to be the currency. By the way, I wish every year, I think we should start this tradition. Every year on whatever day the lockdown was declared, everyone go by all the toilet paper. Like this is like an annual Christmas, except like pandemic miss. And you have to wear a mask to the store. You wear a mask to the store and buy all the toilet paper.

Don't worry about how much it costs because you're gonna use it all eventually. Buy, just buy like pretend like, remember, it was like day one of the, we gotta go buy it all in paper. And everybody goes out because number one is fun. It's fun to have traditions, you know, and then we get a illusion of permanence

whatever, it's our own tradition. We don't have to celebrate Christmas, like our fucking Boomer parents forced us to do and still forced us to do, it's our own tradition. And number three, there'll always be some guy who forgot that it was pandemic toilet paper day, toilet paper day. And he probably don't even go. Oh, fucking toilet paper day. You know why? Fucking dick in his toilet paper day. God damn it.

I knew it. I had it in my calendar. I forgot again. Now I have to use a magazine. You know how that guy can avoid that rage? How? Get a bidet. I'm with you on that. They're fantastic. I don't know another guy using my bidet though. I don't want you using my bidet. I just use it for fresh water every time.

I don't care. I don't like that it, I don't like that the jet of water touched my butthole. Yeah. It doesn't go back down to the, but it's like Thessius' axe. Or who's axe is it? Thessius' ship.

Ship of, yeah, the ship of the sea. Yeah, who's axe is it? I don't remember. Somebody's axe. Somebody made it an axe metaphor. Somebody ripped off the Thessius ship and made it an axe. Like if you replace all the pieces of the ship and the ship.

Is it still his ship? Yes, because metaphysically, the concept of his ship still exists even though it's all been replaced piece by piece and the replacing of the pieces is part of its story. I feel like the bidet penetrates your asshole. Yeah. Metaphysically. I don't want to share that with you. Okay.

Even though the water is different. I'm leaving a little bit of myself behind. Metaphysically. Physically. Yeah. You're going to feel my ghost connected through the timeline. Yeah. Yeah. It's not Gimli's axe.

They're saying it's Gimli's axe. I can only play another one. There needs to be like a doomsday camp. I'm sure there's probably something like that. Like we get them all, you could trick a guy and it's like cut his pat, do an EMP in his house, put him in a fair day. The problem with hitting your kids too well,

they send a child protective services at you. I mean, you should be training your kids, stealth assassinations, how to raid a bunker. Yeah, I mean, these are important skills. That's true. Yeah. Hey, Dick, I got a problem for you.

Okay. Shooting in bathroom stalls as a tall man. Uh, specifically the white thing aspect of it. Ah! That I'm a guy who stands up when he wipes. Are you kidding me? You know, it's the superior way to do it. It's normal.

Stand to wipe. Trying to pretend it's like it's not. You sit down, wipe. Yeah. If I'm out, if I'm out and using, if I'm not using my toilet, yeah. You stand up to wipe. Yeah. But you mean there's a, you stand up to wipe if you're at home? No, not if you're out.

I, I never stand up to wipe. You're, you're ass cheeks go back together if you stand up. You're kind of maneuvering. The whole point of the sitting is that it's spreading. They'll point at him a new very now. The whole point of the sitting is that it's spreading. Your butt cheeks are hard. I never wanted to have this debate. So you just had a friend.

So yeah, yeah, you're I going from the underneath. From the left, you sit there and go back to front while you're sitting down on the toilet. Yeah, not back to front, front to back. You sit, how? What are you talking about? How do you get in there? I'm sitting on the toilet.

I have toilet paper on my hand. Okay. I go under my, I've tried it. I go under it out. My butt cheek, okay. I believe the, I don't know. I mean, I don't, again, I'm not a toilet paper guy. I think you may be right.

What do you mean, you're not, you gotta use toilet paper after a bidet though? It's just like a little like a dab. Well, honestly, I'm not a toilet paper guy. I think you maybe the right, you got to use toilet paper after a bidet though. It's just like a little like a dab. Well, honestly, I hope a little. I don't even do that. I don't even do that. Ideally. Yeah.

I go under, you go under, you go wrong down there though. You go under the cheek and then you wipe it. Why do you stand? What do you mean? I don't know. Do you stand down, point, pull your eyes? And then do you erect? No, I'm not like, they're flaccid, normal, I'm not aroused by it.

Oh, wow. And then do you sit back down? And I don't know. I don't know, I'm fully erect. Do you sit back? I'm mostly erect. But then I just, I don't know, that's, how do you get it all out? You're, what are you fucking get it all out of?

When are you sitting there? I'll kind of say standing up to get in there anyway. Well, you got to put a foot on the sink to get better leverage. You put a foot on the sink? No, I don't put a foot on the sink. I lean slightly to the side. Is this another metric system? I'm raising one buttock off the seat.

I feel like so. That's standing already. It's not standing because I'm still in a stance that widens, okay? If you're standing up, your butchies are pressed together. How are you getting anything in there? Your butchies are not pressed together if you're standing up. Your taking are relaxed. The filth is actually getting in there a little bit.

And by standing up, you're pressing, you're moving it all around. As is insanity stand up, I go you to wipe. Is this another over the waistband thing? I don't wanna ask you. I don't wanna rope you into this conversation. It might be a other way. Johnny, do you stand to wipe? You have to.

You have to. What do you mean you have to? What are you doing? I have no idea what you guys are talking about. Have you tried it our way? Cause I've tried it your way. I couldn't figure out. I'm like, what do I do? Do I have no idea what you guys are talking about. Have you tried it our way? Cause I've tried it your way. I couldn't figure out. I'm like, what do I do a hand off here?

I make you work, but regardless, I have the bidet. I make curling better. Just get a bidet, that's the answer. All right, and they should have them in all the stores. All the stores should have them. Do they not? It's only online. Yeah, no store has a bidet.

Man, you can't buy shit anymore. No, no, no. The only thing you can buy in America anymore at the store is like 50 different brands of peanuts. Right. Anything else? Anything else? It's all, well, we could ship it to your store. Would you like that? Oh, yeah. I would really, I love the, I love ship to my store option. Oh, man. Did the Amazon, did the Amazon lady come up with this? Hey, instead of shipping it to their fucking house, like everywhere else, let's give them the option to ship it to the fucking store.

So they get of all the fun and enjoyment of getting up, probably not even that day either. We'll tell them at night when we process all the orders that it has arrived, they can get up the next day, dress up like an old person going to go vote, come into the store and deal with some fucking idiot to get their product out of a weird place. Amazing, amazing. After waiting behind the lady who was trying to return her open bottle of shampoo.

Yeah, if you're trying, I tried to get a trellis thing for my yard. Yeah, just a bench and a trellis. Yeah. How many home good stores and LA home improvements? There's like six home depots within a 10 mile radius. Yes. Not one of them. All you can get, you can buy center blocks and bags of sand and various weed killer, various weed killing things and drills and, and set it.

It is crazy. I had the same problem with Home Depot just trying to find like some hooks for the ceiling and they're like, yeah, I don't have those. You can ship them to the store. You can ship them to the store. Yeah, you got their website there. You're like, well, why don't you waste my time coming? Why don't you ship this to the store?

Ooh, that's threatening. When you're in a public stall, you gotta like, if you wanna do it, you gotta do it sitting down, which sucks, or you gotta stand up, and then like, do the weird half bend forward with your knees, like the half-small squat. This is, you know this. I fucking know this.

This is the stall. Because it's in like, the top. Everyone else. You don't need to know. You don't need to know. And they'll see what you're doing, like a fucking weirdo. Yeah, then it's like a. It's like a the top. Everyone else. You don't know. You don't know what you're doing, like a fucking weirdo. Yeah, then it's like a communal wiping activity, like, because you're looking over the top of the stall

while you're wiping. Cause you know they can see the top of your head. So that's the problem. That's the problem. Cause I have tried, I don't know, I don't understand how you're supposed to do it. I really don't. Are you trying to go from the front or the side?

What I do is I eat the toilet paper. I do it out of my ass. That's good. That's a good. Toilet paper, it is a terrible system. The bidet is just better. Because as soon as I know that people could see the top of my head in a bathroom stall,

and they know that I'm always thinking there's some fucking idiot in here who does the sit down wiping and he was judging me. I was like an F-slur, like I'm some kind of a lady cause I do it standing. And I, so I hide, I stand up and hunch down so they can't see me. And I don't change my stance

cause then they'll see like, well, they'll see me pivoting. Right. Have you ever been a broad and used a public toilet where it's like, have I ever been a broad, fuck you? Well, I don't know, but I'm saying like, you mean like overseas? Yeah, yeah. What do you think I mean? I mean, a woman because I'm standing up.

Okay. No, no, no, what do you call it? Because then it's like, it's like you get, all the stalls are like little rooms. Because they don't think you're gonna do method in there. So you get like your own little private bathroom experience. But you have to shit in metric. Yeah, exactly. As it comes out of you.

I can't see that. As it comes out of you, the electronic but day measures your fecal matter in centimeters. Unless you know whether you've had a healthy move. Oh, America's gotta use measures in. You can convert units. You know, when you're driving your kilometers to work, a standardized system.

A standardized system across the board just makes it easier for everyone. All right. Yeah, it's time. How long does it take me to, how far away is the airport? Oh, it's about an hour. There you go. Okay.

Do you want metric time? I know how many kilometers. Is the 12 and the six? Not good enough for you on time. Do you want metric, like do you want 10 hours a day? Yes. You do. Yeah, that would be pretty good.

10, 10 months in the year. 12 is, 12 is never a good, 12 seconds. Oh yeah, 12 hours. So inconvenient. They have 12 hours in the Alright, here we go. Hey, I guess Sean, you know, it makes me fucking rage is all these new TV. They don't have a fucking

buttons on them. So you have to have the remote to use TV. And my drunk ass clean my room and throw away my fucking remote afternoon, which I just says, you can't even fucking get the right remote anymore like you try to program on you It didn't fucking work. No, those never work. Those programming shits. No, never all I can do with my TV is plug it into my computer And watch fucking downloaded movies on it and I can't get the Netflix train hang on it So they don't have the fucking remote and there's no buttons on it

Yeah, yeah, they don't have the fucking remote and there's no buttons on it Fucking bullshit just go to the store. We've got to you have to buy a new TV get Amazon ship it to you Take their mode out and say this thing is missing a fucking remote. Yeah, I fold that move I do that every time one of my PlayStation controllers breaks Just buy a new one put the bro go in the package. Yeah, it's a piece of shit the package. Yeah, it's things a piece of shit. I can't. No, no, no, no. Fuck them. Well, yeah, because they're just going to ship it back to Sony and they're going to fix it and find a way to sell it anyway.

I don't, I don't feel bad committing crimes against big box stores. It's, it's, it's no fuck, fuck all of them. Probably made them to call some five bucks to make the thing anyway. I still can't believe the day I went into Best Buy to get my phone replaced and saw and realized that these people have been working there eight hours a day for a year with wearing face masks on the whole time. It broke my brain. Oh yeah.

This is unconscionable to do. How did somebody pass that memo along? Like, I have to go tell these people that they need to wear a mask for eight hours a day. And definitely, no, I can't do that. I don't know why there haven't been more workplace shooting says a result of yeah, yeah, neither are like when I go to the like a drive through in the McDonald's workers, you're just there suffering next to a grill.

They deserve it. Yeah, they gave me an unsalted man. We went to a beach. We went to a beach party last week, drinking on the beach, dogs on the beach in a fire, someone just dug a pit and had a fire. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I thought I went back in time to our parents when you could just do normal things like that. We drove home and I said, oh man, I'm going to get like two super sized fries.

I'm going to really pick out today. He's going to be my day. And it was all fucked up, it took forever. The line was long, get the fries. Here we go, honey, get on the freeway. I'm gonna save it till we get on with all the jumping around with those fries going out. Home, absolutely no salt.

Wow. Oh, how does that even happen? How do you fuck up the salt? Absolutely no salt wow How do you fuck up the salt? So I threw him out the window You're at least out of fun beach day no, it's ruined because the fries I just told you about Look from Western Australia, you know, if a foot makes me a road, middle widths, middle widths. People who are just fucking smart enough to think they know something. Oh, yeah. They're stupid to know what they don't know.

Yeah. They just, they think they know the totality of all knowledge because they're a little bit smarter than most people. Yeah. And you just want to fucking strangle them until they realize there's no way that they know all the things they think they know. Yeah. You ever get those guys who, uh, no matter what the topic is, they're like, oh, yeah, yeah, I know all about that. Yeah, I know all about that. Okay. I know the principles. Yeah. Yeah. Well, the principles aren't what do the job. Yeah.

I'm wrong. I know about rocket engineering. You know that old saying, the details don't really matter. That's the class. Explanning, of course, the devil is nowhere. The details are not important. Um, that, that midwit chunk, middlewit chunk, like 115 IQ on either side, whatever chunk that goes to college is the most dangerous, obnoxious chunk. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You fuel them up with it.

Fuel them up with one too many participation ribbons and you get what is currently America. Well, no matter what happens, we can figure it out together. Where are the middlewids? Give us what problems you got. Let me make sure you list them and we'll get, tell me everything that's a problem and we'll get together and put our middlewit power together and figure it out.

Yeah, a moron with a college degree is really the most horrible thing. It is because it gives them this confidence that they don't deserve nor should they have. It's not even morons. It's people who are smarter than most people, I think. Yeah. Like the, like one 15, like one 15 is smarter than, I don't know, 60.

It's in the top 33% of people, right? Yeah. With the bell curve. Okay. That is, that is fucking dangerous. Because they're still not smart enough to really, because they're still not that smart. Yeah. Like they're smarter than most people. That really because they're still not that smart. Yeah. Like they're smarter than most people. That's not, that's not a lot.

Yeah. Most of these people believe in witches and aliens. To be fair, those UFO videos keep coming out. I don't know what it is. What do you mean? What it is? Well, cause I don't know what the UFO videos, I don't know what they're saying. You've seen the weird stuff that's coming out.

A bunch of garbage. I mean, it goes to malfunctions and bullshit. I assume it's, yeah, that's sort of stuff. I don't think I don't know. I hate aliens. Do you like, do you like aliens? For me, it's the kind of thing where I'm like, well, if, if, if evidence comes out cool, but I'm not like going to really think to, what's evidence though? Like if, I don't like a certain comes out tomorrow and says, Hey, aliens, we talked to the aliens and they probably accept that. Why? Why would they?

You would think that they would lie about that for some tactical. Oh, sir, assuming that there is aliens, they've been lying about it the whole time. What do you mean? Do I think they would lie? Well, they could come up with something. I don't know what would they get out of it? Money.

There's other ways to get out of it. Aliens are, aliens are gonna lock us down. Aliens need us to lock down, because our shit is fucking like a disease for them. Like, you know, and- They said we cannot join the Galactic Council unless you continue wearing masks for the next 20 years. Yes.

They will do that. No. At some point, they will get a lot of time- And then they'll get a lot of time- And they'll get a lot of time- And they'll get a lot of time- They'll get a lot of time- They'll get a lot of and then they'll get a travel into mortality. Yeah, okay You don't think that's beyond Feeta wait a minute People made up God

Yeah, what do you mean are they gonna make up aliens God is a thousand times dumber than will we talk to aliens today? The government doesn't use God as much these days. For a long time. He heard of the Republican Party. Yeah, well, they're not in power right now. Trump said, Trump had to say on television that he believed in God. No fucking way is that true. Well, why would he lie about that? I'm down Trump. Um, fucking God, guys, right? Just like Jesus, he has sex with sex with you know ladies of the night All right Would they lie about that? Catch it back and call on back in again. I just need to follow up on the

Refractory period that you guys are talking about oh, you know, try it. I mean this makes it in a little bit with Pronoun acceptance so dick you may be on board. Okay, the thing they don't tell you about that medicine is you've got to have something up your ass for it to work. What? Your cock still goes flaccid after the first orgasm, so the second one kind of has a big asterisk next to it. Just to head up in case you want to know and try it out, I still wouldn't know that podcast if you guys do it.

So, at the moment, go fuck yourselves. I don't know about that, up the ass part. Wait, why would you need something up the ass to get the second one going? Because that's where your prostate is. I mean, I assume. Yeah, you just, what you just, you just, you just, you just, you just,

you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, you just, just, you just, you just, just, you just, you just, you just, just, you just, you just, you just, you just, just, you just, just, you just, you just, just, need to do, I'm confused. I don't know. Maybe that guy's tried it. I don't know where he's getting this research. Let's see here. Hey, VK Sean, here's a raise I've always had speaker people, shoe people.

So, hey, if it's like, it's a whole-minded investing. Oh, God, if I spend $300, I can make $200 on my shoes. I'm just kidding. I'm just fucking shoes for years make two hundred dollars on my shoes i don't know if you're feeling that much of fucking shoes for years i'm being on my friend and uh... we just like fucking like cut the line is jumped in and all of a sudden we're a fucking ass bath that like i don't know that we got to go in

before them and then even when the camera we're like yeah those shoes are fucking gay dude hahaha hahaha hahaha hahaha day uh... that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that I like this man's energy. You know any shoe people? Well, that's what I was saying last week is that the Pokemon guys I was saying, just go do it with something like shoes at least

is a little more. There's just so much inventory. A deletional. A little less pathetic, but yeah, the thing is, do you think the shoe manufacturers haven't caught on and are now gonna release a new limited edition shoe every week until the market is so super saturated that no one's gonna care about new limited edition shoe every week until like the market is so super saturated that no one's gonna care about your limited edition, you know, Kobe Bryant took a dump

on these, you know, dunks before he died. I'm so glad my dad is a stock broker. Yeah, and Mark, actual stock. It accidentally fall into like shoes. What's up? Hey, I just go to the shoe store every week and Tuesday morning fucking wait for the news fair. I have a quite valuable video game collection myself.

But I know, but it seems like it's all stuff. I bought us around you like you got a whole all that. I always mean Tori. Yeah, I know. I'm going to put a liquidate on some. Hey, Dick, do some make me rage women and their nightmare scenarios that they keep on fucking creating so I was seeing on Social media like I guess what do you mean? One and like they do this all the time were they you know screenshot and share, you know

They're tender conversations Well, this one was just literally a guy say, you know, like, I guess some bumble thing saying, hey, I want to get to know you before anything. And I don't mind taking my talk. And so she messaged him and they're just talking. And he just is like, oh, you know, I realize that we're pretty close. That's pretty cool. And he just sends like kind of like just like a smiling, you know, kind of emoji.

And she's like, oh, you're being so forward. And, you know, I didn't realize you're being so forward and being so sexual. And then he unmasked her and people are like oh you're you're being so forward and you know i didn't realize you're being so for me to be so sexual and he unmasked her and people are like yeah yeah she was right and like no you know like the mother fucker was trying to talk to you and you're already like jumping and he's like you know i'm not going to do this shit and yet all these comments are always women with these nightmare scenarios saying like all you see he's leaving is him admitting that he knew that he was going to

have a was like you know that's not what's her it's not her that cloth the line is not her to make him uncomfortable to the only around but that's what I want to do this is like oh my god you know like what the fuck is up with women doing these like huge ass nightmare scenarios of like everything

reading into like every little situation? Oh, did he put it on his phone? You put it on his phone because he doesn't want you to look at it, you know? That's true. He's talking about her children. They see her not to, sorry, other women and shit. Then it's just like, what the fuck is going on?

Like why did he do that? All right, all right, I would get him. I thought he was gonna just like, what the fuck is going on? Like why, why do you, I thought he was going to be like, you know, how the women always have, they do like their own 9, 11 version of like guys, they almost maybe could have dated in the right circumstance where they're like, I match with him on Bumble. Well, actually it was his cousin, but then he later went and like shot up his workplace. So like we were almost married basically. Or the girls who had need these elaborate, like, oh, I'm gonna go talk to a guy and if I'll give you a signal to come save me

from the new, come up with an excuse. Like they're on a sitcom. Yeah. And they do these, they share those weird little memes of like, if you're at a bar, you can order these. The angel drinks, the angel these. The angel shot. The angel shot.

Tell the bars, Andrew. Who's a fucking CIA agent? You know, these examples, tell them you want this and then he'll call the police. Yeah. But if you tell them you want a red angel shot, that means he'll call child protective services. But if you tell him that you don't want ice, he will fuck that up. So I don't know how this angel shot thing is gonna have. I'm just gonna see a bartender going,

we don't have that. We don't have that. Excuse me, sir. Oh, you mean that rape thing on the internet? Sir, are you gonna rape her? See, he's not gonna rape you, there's no problem. Yeah, he says he's gonna kill you. That guy's in here all the time.

He's good. I'm gonna go call the cops on on a guy because you ordered a shot. You idiot. And they share it all day. Just want to make sure he knows he's never used to that thing. Has that ever been a thing that someone said, I need an angel. No way. No way in hell.

Just leave the bar. Just like no woman has ever punched a man with her keys her house keys no woman has ever put her keys like Wolverine and hit a guy never happened that's the most I don't think it's ever happened to a man actually okay. Yo Dick, so I've been listening to your show for a few years and and and you know those things that I disagree with and things that I agree with and that I disagree with. What do you disagree with? That's what we talk about.

I think it's just an on that I just think is you know props, props to this is sticking it to these stupid no-fappers and the anti-porn people. Now, yeah, fuck them. The thing with this is that remember five years ago we were all complain about getting banned and and you know twitter being like all you to radicalize people when you don't radicalize people the thing that i had most about this now and i started to realize you know maybe you two does radicals of course it does

if you're no fabular radicalize you're totally radical dude but uh... you know no fact is like the stupidest fucking thing ever. I mean if you go three or four days though jerking off It's fine is when you do end up, you know bust and not say that. It's pretty good But is it worth it? You know, it's pretty good. It's like coming here. It doesn't work the same way. Okay, that's all I'm I this is dumb. This is fucking dumb. You could come four times a day if you want, which is weird, but whatever. Whatever.

Whatever. It's called being hungover. America, it is. It's called Sunday. It's called Sunday. It's called Sunday. It's like, oh, you lose your minerals. You lose your fucking minerals. The mineral loss is just, that's true. This is fucked up. This is dumb. It's like a car. Dr. Strangelo. That motherfucker. Like a outfly that gets caught between the window and the screen.

It's normal. It's fucking normal. If it wasn't normal, our hands wouldn't be able to reach down to grab our clocks. Our front door, frontal lobes, wouldn't be able to imagine titties now and in the anti-corner should be how much border you watching a day if you're watching eight hours of porn

that's maybe that's the problem that ain't my problem this is just like going in the kfc just get it to get some popcorn chicken and then get out you eat in the park a lot and you don't think about it for the rest of the day that's what you know. Yeah. Like being straight. But you're working off that they have to start this, this, this, this, uh, this, I don't want to, I don't want to bash the Chris. You know what it, you know what it annoys me about this pride, the turning, pulling the

sexuality of it is because they're desperately trying to make, like, make it an identity. But it's, it's the, it's entirely sexual, right? Being gay is entirely a sexual identity. Everything else is untouched. The identity thing is like, it's become like, you don't go to gay McDonald's. You just go to McDonald's. You don't go to gay work.

You go to work and work like normal. That was the whole point. Well, they're just like, the same as everybody else in all ways except the dick in the bud. That was the whole point. Like, well, it's, they're just like, they're the same as everybody else in all ways, except the dick and the butt. That's, that's it. So that's well, what's the, what's their festival about then? Fucking guess. Yeah, but now you will have, you know, the local queer owned coffee shop or whatever. Yeah, and that's horrible. Like that. You know, and the whole thing has got a rainbow flag on every coffee cup. Oh, it's a weird schism between the people who are like, it's just who I like to fuck and the people who go,

it's me, it's what, it's all that I am. Me fucking is my only identity. Yeah. That's what the furries are doing, the same thing. You want a fuck wearing an animal costume, but then you're like, no, I'm actually a wolf. And it's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, you just really enjoy fucking what? I think you know you're not a wolf. Now you just, that you watch too much Disney afternoon and fried your fucking brain.

Like this, there should be a class action lawsuit of furries against Disney for they did this, they fucking did this. If cigarette companies are getting sued uh... furry promoting disney's getting sued to uh... k couple more what time is it oh my god one forty five did you do kundalini uh... for dimension about the uh... episode were shot at the time i'm disappointed in johnny and vido and you all the Mr. Sink and retention was on the show

talking about Queen Delaney that not a think one of you made the joke that he's talking about the Queen Delaney and what we did that though I thought I thought I'm not paying you five dollars I'm not paying five dollars. I think I said, cum Delaney. You know, on the daily. Oh, it's cum Delaney an actual word. Cooom is. Is cum Delaney an actual word? KUN Delaney is a word. COOM is the joke.

Oh, I thought that this was like a thing that no fat people had made up to just be like, oh, yeah, it's my cum Delaney or whatever. No, no. As it comes spirit that lives inside me. No well now I learned something I didn't make the joke because I didn't realize there was a joke to be made I thought it was I think I made myself a referential yeah I think you might have said so oh here Riley called it let's see this hey dick it's me righty the figure I uh, why haven't you plugged any of my content with, uh, simple

things? Uh, thanks. Go find yourself and Sean, I miss you. I guess I can plug it, I guess. Are they YGG studios? I don't know. Yeah, you, you're a studio. The voyage.

I forgot to wear my void chaser's t-shirt next time. Riley could just text me those types of things. They always need to call out the voicemail. OK, is that maybe one more? So boys, Roy's chasing those voids. Hey, what makes me a rage is direct brain. I guess it's like a dick measuring contest, but with your brain, people walk around showing off

like how direct their brain can get like, oh, did you hear a lot of lines, so we'll throw it back or maybe you're just playing along, entertaining them, entertaining the thought process going, yeah, yeah, I know what you're talking about. Yeah, I've heard, I've heard through the great find what you're talking about. I can infer what you're talking about with this because I'm a man who kind of gets around and hears, you know, a multitude of things. And then they come back with no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, look at how smart I am. I think

you didn't think of it this way or this way or this way or this way or this way. Shut up. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, and brag to me about how much they know about a specific program which is shit that Maddox wants to do by the way picking a part of minutia of stuff and bragging about how much you know trivially about a trivial what people should think that doesn't matter like what? these are examples he has been very impressive you're a very impressive person

you gotta give me some examples on me i know all dlc that was ever released for a shitty mm game oh it's and i know i know i don't know minutiae minutiae

that really tried to win it did not come prepared with examples well because he's talking about somebody but he doesn't want to say who it is. Yeah. He's talking about someone. Somebody said something specific to him. Try dating a teacher. Or having a mom who is a teacher.

If you want to really get your fucking brain fried over, someone's showing off the minutiae of things that they understand. Well, actually, that's a... The Siblin is there. Well, that's sort of, that's a, it's a, it's a thosound that they're messing up on. Predicated now and comes after the substandard net. Yeah. Okay. What did I do? Did you see the ever the teacher literacy test in New York? Oh, really? Yeah. So, I don't want to guess why because I'm sure that's well, can possibly the reason why I'm guessing is I'm so sorry for me to assume it's having

trouble with the test. What is it? New York. I believe it's New York public schools literacy test, like a literacy test. Yeah, you know, just some people test for teacher literacy ditched in New York state. A reader, a Bertsden points out, but what can I get? Evolution is true.com. That's what comes up as the first link for Duk-Duk-D while you got a sweat while I dig you're using Google you're basically supporting the global the global home or whatever you got to switch to duck dot go sure let me give duck duck dot duck dot go shot public public school New York literacy fucking why evolution is true dot com amazing. That's that's my most amazing results.

What happens if you hit the news tab? They have a news tab. Wow, they just do not. Doesn't have it at all. Dr. Koeh is not that good. God, I hate Dr. Koeh. New York public literacy, New York school literacy test. There it is.

Oh, what's the region's one? Uh, regions, you know what? Fucking ironically, duck duck go had to ride away. Although now it's New York time. God dammit. God dammit. Here Sean taught me this. This period thing before it gets rid of it.

The board of regions on Monday. Well, I guess it doesn't work anymore. Amazing. Well, I really want to learn the whole story and see what's happening below the fold, but I don't have that fucking option of doing it. Thanks a lot. I can't even read it.

Well, let's get this way. That's a different story anyway. Yeah, because here I actually took the practice test. Let me see. The NYSTCE literacy test. I don't know why I can't find the news article about it though. That's been erased. Okay, here we go.

It makes sense. No, wait, this one's 2017. Classic veto and his right wing. Fake news. I mean, I kind of classic Why is it hiding now? Worst take yet. What was the worst take? No, zoo. It's not Wheel of Fortune Wheel of Fortune goes

Wheel of fortune. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I was in no, that's jeopardy. Yeah. How does Wheel of Fortune go? Wheel of Fortune goes, I don't know, Wheel of Fortune. It's nice. I was about to do that. That's tonight's show. That's gotta be nice.

Yeah, that's gotta be nice. All right. I was thinking prices are right. Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da