The Dick Show - Episode 290 - Dick on Shooting Your Eye Out

Episode Date: December 28, 2021

I get shot in the eye, Mr. Girl calls in about starting a cult and stopping his girlfriend's HRT, Tariq Nasheed's homosexual Buck Breaking NFTs, Sean throws a snowball at a man's face, and advice on quitting your job; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

Do you like this? Do you think they managed to fix the eye patch? You think it was perfected a long time ago, since it's so basic. Like the most utilitarian thing in history, well, we'll just slap like a band around your head and then the eye patch is on your eye. Right. They had thousands of years of eye wounds to perfect this technology. Sure. CVS has gone ahead and perfected it even further.

So now it's a one size fits all eye hole maxi pad. Yeah. You hold on your face with one hand and then lay strips of surgical tape from your forehead to your cheek. So much better, Sean. So much easier. What you're gonna do by cheek. So much better, Sean. Yeah, much easier, but you're gonna do by yourself. So much easier to do by yourself.

When you get out of the shower, everybody loves sticky tape residue. All over their forehead. Yeah, when they're dealing with eyeball problems, as opposed to the, you know, the strap, right, the patch and the strap. I sent the lovely lady out to, and I said, hey, well, you know what, maybe can you grab me an eye patch and then we bagged from coffee because I can't open the side and it's a real pain in the ass to keep it clamped shut

and I don't think that's really good. So can you grab, pick me up an eye patch, she comes back and drops a box of, I'm like, what, honey? Come on. Can you pick me up an eye patch? Yeah. She comes back and drops a box of eye. I'm like, what, honey? Come on. Yeah. You know pirates, right?

Yeah. You know, come on. And she goes, well, they were out of the other ones. Right. So I go online, sure enough, out. Like, why do you carry any of these? Why do you carry any of this janky eye patch? Any at all?

When, what is one scenario where this is better than a strap around your head and a last extrab? I don't know. Well, I must have a pirate costume somewhere in the house that I can get a fucking eye patch from. Unless it's like, you're medicated. Unless it's medicated and supposed to somehow see them. They're medicated?

No, but that's just a dry, so wait a minute. So God damn it. Is it the light that fucks your eye up? My whole face My whole side of my face Hurts and moving it around it just it's just like stabbing pain every once in a while the light is yeah It's an issue. I shot my nephew shot me in the eye with a gun that I got him how's How's that for irony? How's that for hilarity?

Is that ding-ding? Hey. Hey. Hey. I'll try to take it off after a big. He's a looks-fucking-stupid. Come beard the pirate. What are they going to call me?

Yeah! Welcome to the Ike Youwant Digging Youwant Digging Youwant Digging you love it you got us the show of his contest Give me your life from Mount Bucker deep in the heart of the city of failure me house dick masters Okay, the twenty million dollar man joining me is always the world touring L.A.B. Basque comedian Sean the audio engineer yeah Talk like a pirate days today. It's be a cold day and hell Yeah, it's be a come day on the ship? How many gay pirate names will I get?

I should have prepared better for pirate controls. I didn't want to warn you. Didn't go well. No one watches the episode after Christmas anyways. No one will see this. Oh really? Everybody's out of town or what? Yeah, all right.

Everybody's out of town. We can probably go now. Too busy. Yeah, that's it. Hey, that's the show everybody. I really regret my COVID show, not just releasing a, yeah, that's it, everybody. I've got COVID. I don't know, why was I thinking?

Why didn't I do that? Why didn't somebody suggest that to me? Why didn't you suggest that to me? I don't know. What a fucking wasted opportunity, because I thought I was going to be able to do a show. That's why. Yeah. You guys got me right to the very end, or said, just fuck it.

And I was so sad. Yeah. I said, fuck it earlier, I would have thought of something funny. Hebris, got me right to the very end or said just fuck it. I was so sad. I said fuck it earlier, I would have thought of something funny. That's true, actually. God, damn it. That's true, actually. God, damn it. Well, my stupid little nephew,

this is bam bam, bam bam. Nerf, we're having an amazing Nerf gun war. You know, giggling, giggling, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, who Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New

Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New Jersey, New They're not those, you know, those tube, those tube darts that they used to have with the suction things on the end. Oh, sure. And they used to be like squishy. And they're squishy fun out. They don't like that anymore.

Yeah. They got like a cross at the end. They're like a full on, they got magazines. They're not squishy. You mean they de-nerved? They de-nerved the Nerf guns. The Nerf guns. Because everything else has gotten so It's done so shitty.

Yeah, they're great. They're the only thing that he's approved. Wow. Now they are harder. They shoot harder than UK police guns. Wow. So I'm loading in my magazine, giggling like an idiot, you know.

Yeah. Look over. I hear Uncle. My look over. I look over. And the time it takes me to look over. I hear uncle my look over I look over and the time it takes me to look over I see The barrel of a gigantic nerf gun pointed right at my fucking eye how close The child was standing less than a foot from me. Oh my god straight Hey uncle, so I had to look down when I looked over,

looking down, looking down the barrel of a gun. They three foot, three foot, I mean, they have bolt, they're bolt action nerf guns. Might as well bend this close. Yeah. Three feet. Hey, Uncle.

Boom. And it was like, it hit and I felt my brain rattle. Oh, it felt like a mortal combat 11 fit the double fucking shoulder moves that take out half your health that they introduced. You have to watch the whole animation for an X-ray every time. I could feel my retina attached to my back of my brain, shutter, I was like, oh, god, that was a weird pain.

Uh-oh. Right, like I could feel the slome of my eyeball hitting and like, just like a, like the moon crashing into the earth, right? Like a gif like that. Like, just boom, right on the surface. Oh, he could feel it. Move. Yeah, I felt, and they got these for four Christmas.

That you got them. I got them one of them. And of course, they were told, you don't shoot somebody in the face with them. Oh, this is a regular occurrence with them. Yeah. Do not get that fucking clothes. Do not get that clothes.

Don't aim at the head. Don't aim at the eye. So I dropped, it was like the matrix dodged this. Yeah. Hey, I'm a little close. Dodge the right. I hit the ground. I go, I'm like grabbing in my head, I feel like I'm gonna cry. Yeah, I haven't had a feeling like I'm gonna cry in probably 30 years. So foreign. Like it, this can't be the feeling I'm feeling. You don't remember what that feeling is like. Like I've bashed my shin so hard in the bed I thought it was broken.

I fucked up my pinky toes and you know it's like, oh, that's fucking broken. But this was like, I think I'm gonna fucking cry. Yeah. What just happened? So I go, just because I want everything to stop. Like I don't wanna be continually hit with darts and stuff. Right. I go, fuck.

Only I didn't say fudge. I said it, the word, the big one. The F dash dash dash word. I just go fuck. Right? Yeah. Because I'm the best one and not swearing around the kids. Right.

And I'm just holding it. You're entitled at that point. And then I hear the women mandate. Yeah, I was like, no, no, no, no, this is a worth it. And I hear the women scrambling around. And my first thought is, oh no, that kid's about to be in serious trouble. I go, oh, no, no, no, no, it's okay.

It'll be fine. It'll be fine. There's water just pouring out of my, I'm checking my eyeball. I think it's dropped out. Yeah, my go, fuck, is it still in my head? It's still in my head. It's still in my head.

Yeah, more or less. Still in my fucking head. And I hear them already laying, I hear the sound of a mom. I don't know if it's my mom or his mom decleating a kid. That's football. Taring the toy, you know, you know, the sound of plastic getting torn out of a child's hand.

I thought they were angry about the shirt, yanked him off his feet. No, they grabbed the gun. You know, you can hear it. Cuck's, you can hear a woman angrily handling a gun toy. The end of all fun. I hate them. Oh, no, no, no, no, it's, it'll be all right.

It'll be all right. The other thing's like, what did I tell you about shooting at the eye? Oh, God. Was it, were they scared? They probably were. Yes. And then you got, well, you know, everyone is a medical expert now since COVID happened. Sure.

So I got my dad's in there with the jaws alive trying to pry my hand away from my face so he could see what the matter is. Right. Right. And then dispense some folksy wisdom on how to, let me get in there. What are you going to see? Let me tell you about riding a bike. I can't see.

Yeah. Well, he's had two retina detachment. Right. Let me get in there. What are you gonna see? Let me tell you about riding a bike. I can't see. Yeah. Well, he's had two retina detachment. Right. So he knows all the, if it was happening to him, he could probably tell you what was going on, but I don't know. Yeah.

I don't know if you could just eyeball it. Like, oh, yep, yeah. Yeah, on a scale of one to 10 on Christmas night. Yeah. I'm fucked as, like, bro. How fucked is your- Where are we gonna go? We're gonna go drive to a vet and give him 500 bucks and walk in, walk in clinic where they'll fuck it up.

I've been to the ER enough. This Christmas season, I'm not going for this eye shoot. Can you see? Yeah, but it's dark. It's dark and there's a ring. Wow. I think there's a ring of where the Nerf Dart hit me stuck to your right in the fucking pupil. Yeah. God, damn it. It did like a scoring line,

like, you know, like movies where they break into a through a window to, you know, get inside for a job. Yeah, like a diamond heist. Yeah, like a diamond. They just score the glass then. God, damn it. And it's the good eye. That's epistening off more. You have different, yeah, left eye sucks. Like you ever sit there, pretend like you only have one eye to see how hard it is. Oh yeah, no, they're two different.

Reading and stuff. Yeah, this eye's horrible, this eye's okay. Well, you also see, most people see two, like if you look at a white wall, you'll see two different shades of white. Really? Yeah, it won't be exact. Yeah, your eyes are wall, you'll see two different shades of white. Really? Yeah, it won't be exactly your eyes. Yeah, your eyes are just,

nobody's eyes are really exactly the same. Well, this eye sucks. The left eye sucks. So he gets, he's getting yelled at. Well, getting infected by six doctors. Right, right. It was like in the 300 win, everybody's dead silent. Like when Leonidas hits Zerksy's with the spear, it makes him bleed.

That's what it was like. Because everyone's secretly glad. I can't, I have fuck. He said there's kind of a long time. He fucking nailed him. And you bought the game. And he was wearing goggles. That was the worst part.

Like, oh, you fuck some my sister. Not even a level playing field. The stakes are not the same for both of you. This is a festivist show. I'm just going to complain about everything in the way. I love festivists. My loved ones. My sister comes in and said, oh, I don't yell at him too much. And has a one in a million shot. How are you going to shoot someone in the eye on purpose? Good to hit four. Well, from that, just a matter of way. No, it's probably probably better odds than one in a minute.

He 50-50. For some, I mean, it's, hey, I'm go. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. She goes, I know what happened. He was trying to shoot you in the neck because you had hit him in the neck earlier in the day. He's a horrible shot.

Well, here we are alive. Because He's a horrible shot. Well, here you are alive. Because you're a horrible shot. He was pointing it at my neck, right? As I was standing up where he fucked up with the hey uncle. What? It would have been a good joke. Yeah, yeah. I get what you're doing.

That would have been funny, but you know, sometimes you don't need, sometimes you don't need to call attention to it before you do it. Yeah. You just do it. I remember I'd hit him with a little bit long. We were playing across the house. You know, he's tiny. So how far did these things shoot pretty far?

Huh? They're so far. Wow. Across the living room. You got to account for the Coriolis effect. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got to lob it in there a little bit, right? Yeah.

What were you saying? No, I was going to say, I remember doing something you gotta lob it in there a little bit, right? Yeah, what were you saying? No, I was gonna say I remember doing something similar, but it was with a snowball hitting someone in the eye. Well, we went it just more like Vengeance. Oh, yeah, I was always a vindictive, you know, like you wrong me like I will fuck you. Yeah, I will I I will get my no Sicilian in my family. Oh, okay. I'll take my knowledge of Naples. Oh, all right.

But yeah, when I was a little kid, we went to the snow with some, some neighbors. I think I went right wood out in the Antelope Valley area. And we knew we were going to have like a snowball fight because that's what happens. But the friends dad, we had just gotten there and I was out and I was like, I don't know what I was doing. I was fucking around in the snow and I just get fucking nailed on the side of the head just like out of nowhere and I'm instantly fucking pissed. Yeah. Like my blood just boiled and I saw it and it was the friend's dad. Like he thought it's funny, just, you know, hey, he's right there.

So I fucking, I was like, okay, okay, okay, it was just, it was so, it had no honor. Yeah. It had no honor. It's a grown up. Yeah, it was like, I was so pissed at just the act that he would have the audacity to do that. When nobody knew the rule, there were no rules, there were no rules laid down. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know, no one knew the stakes. So I just waited until he was fucking over there building a snowman with somebody. I packed, hard packed snow, I'm probably like seven. Yeah. Dude, and I just fucking unloaded on his face from like five feet. And I'll never forget the look on his face. He was so pissed off, but he didn't want to do anything.

Dude, it just like, my mom told me letters. She's like, yeah, he said that really hurt. And I was like, good, good, fucko. Yeah, and they got about punishing me. I was like, but it was like, you know, whatever it was, it went bad. It was just like, I was, dude, I would have killed him if I could have. No, I know.

I know. That's how pissed I was. Just fucking unloaded on them. This is like your, this is your son, Sean Sosu-Path story collection. That one, the fishing, weight, digging cars. Yeah, well, that was, to me, that was more really stupid kid shit, but that was my temper, but the snap that would happen in my brain was something else. I had also fucked him over.

I felt bad about the neck thing and I had thrown a football at him that had poop on it. So he was double, he was doubling pissing at me. Wait, like, hey, catch, we're playing catch and it had shit on it. We're playing catch, we're fucking around outside in my parents backyard with his new football that he got. Yeah. And then, cause he's got a hell of an arm for a little kid.

Yeah, yeah. And he throws to me. The little ones, a little kid. Yeah. And he throws it to me. The little ones, the athletic one. Yeah. Yeah. I pick it up and I said, oh, my God, there's poop on the football. And I throw it like a huge arc. Yeah.

Just as a joke. Right. Like there's no, he doesn't have like six minutes to, usually he doesn't catch it. He kind of hops out of the way. Yeah. If he gets too far apart, he kind of hops out of the way. Yeah. If you get too far apart, he kind of jumps out of the way. Like, uh, I was like, all right. So there's no way this is gonna go badly, right?

45 degree arc in the air, 10 seconds of hang time. And it's like a punt. He just goes, freezes, goes to the right, goes to the left and then turns his back at the last minute and gets hit in the back with the poop football Oh my god Come on. No damn it. So I know that feeling leave a mark. I didn't see because he ran away crying He cried. Yeah, I'm like I know you're crying because you're embarrassed. I know you're not crying because it hurt like, ah, fuck. You threw like a knuckleball in there where you was like,

oh God, it moved the other way. Yes, and then it started, you got transfixed, right? By the hang time. It just looks like it's not moving. So you guys don't know which way to go. He's like, well, it's gonna move. It's gotta be a parabola. I know how to handle a fucking parabola.

I got hypnotized. Ah, I felt so bad about that. I'm like, ah, that's not really, like that's not really fun. It's not be a parabola, I know how to handle a fucking parabola. I got hypnotized. I felt so bad about that. I'm like, ah, that's not really, like that's not really my fault. Not completely. No. And then I hit him in the throat. With the gun.

Well, that's not my fault at all. It'll be pissed off at that. Yes. So then this was the vengeance. Right. For the poop football. Yeah. So I wasn't pissed because, I wasn't pissed because I wasn't pissed

because I knew about the, I mean, I was pissed either way because you can't be upset at dangerous toys. They'll use it against you. That's like a party, yeah. Plattly, you know, that's like a political party thing. Like Biden getting let's go brand and then Vito's on the going, actually Biden handled that like a Chad.

He actually just defused the situation and moved along with I don't think, because he didn't know what he was talking about Vito. But he doesn't even know where he is. What do you mean he handled it? Well, I don't even know how he handled it. He said, yeah, let's go, Brent. You didn't see that?

Biden, a caller called in on Biden's Christmas time show and the caller said, yeah, let's go, Brandon, Biden said, I agree, let's go, Brandon and his wife was like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, you know, even historically like he's, he's called himself a walking gaff machine. Yeah. So yeah, he's no internet memes. Right.

So the kid came in later and I was like, hey, buddy, how you doing? It's okay. I'll be all right. I'm sorry, Uncle. like, hey, buddy, how you doing? It's okay. It'll be all right. I'm sorry, I'm calling. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. You got to do me a favor, though. You got to shoot it. You got to aim at the weiner. You can't be shooting at eyes.

Because that's always funny. Yeah, because I don't need that. I need my eyes. I don't need my weiner for anything. So I'd shoot at that. I was like, okay. Yeah, he felt really bad. Yeah, because he got yelled at by everybody.

Yeah. It's such a horrible feeling. You fucked up just a little bit as a kid. And somebody gets really hurt. Oh, damn it. But I know I was testing it. I got too close to the line. Well, he had no idea that was gonna happen, of course.

Yeah, here's what else makes me rage about Christmas. I'm watching my girlfriend brings over all the presents that I bought my family. Yeah. And I'm just seeing them roll out one after the other. Each one getting more expensive than the last. Thinking, what is this? Oh, you don't, what you bought?

Yeah, where was there, was there, did you get clearance on this? Did you get approval on this? Hmm. How much did I spend on Christmas presents this year? Then the last one comes out, an indoor smoresmaking kit. Now, I'm thinking like Easy Bake oven, right? Or something like that? Ends on a plastic ship.

Yeah. It's like a, it's a full on, uh, yuppie looking centerpiece. Like it's like a wood, like locally farmed wood and this stone, smokeless fire, and these metal skewers that make a kids tree. Yeah, I'm like, what the fuck is this? This is a, this looks like, this looks like it cost about a 120 bucks,

I'm gonna say conservatively. Yeahly for kids making smores inside. It's made by like, like, Viking who make like industrial ranges. Or is this shit? Yeah. Uh, did you try it? Try it. The locket down. Amazon needs a, no, I didn't try it.

Amazon needs like a cap. Yeah, like a cap. You're girlfriend shopping for your family. Well, with the family, you're with your account with your, no, no, no, no, no, Yeah, like a cap. You're girlfriend shopping for whether you're just signed with your account with your credit card. No, not my account. Never. But I gotta get one of those privacy.com cards

that people keep telling me about. You can preload it within an amount of money. So next year, I'll give her that. Got it. I'll put like $12 on it or something. Here you go, knock yourself out. Or watch her sheepishly come to you after like, she's like, I have like seven more presents to buy.

And I already went through the card. Yeah. Um, um, my dad, my dad wants to take, take us out for lunch for Christmas, because they haven't gone out and like since COVID started. So no like, are you gonna have dinner later, or that's like in lieu of? I don't know.

Yeah. That's why he always wants to do lunch. I don't know if it's because it's cheaper, or so he wants to get home and watch TV at night. He always wants to do lunch, and I don't like doing lunch because I got stuff to do during, you know, during the day. Yeah.

You know what I mean? You gotta get it. I said when everyone's on Twitter talking shit. Yeah, I got to be up and around during those times. Sure. I don't want to do it. Let's do it. Can I talk you into a nice dinner? I went around, I backchanneled with my mom like,

hey, let's do dinner. Conspiring. Yeah, conspiring. Hey, no, fuck that guy. All right, Texas, I mean he was busy. You want to do the house dinner sound. Oh, that sounds great. Make a bunch of plans and then it's like,

yeah, yeah, yeah. You have to tell everybody that it's not my fault. Fucking fine. So I suckered him into a nice dinner and I'm thinking, all right, could change. Now I could get some of that present money out of this out of the sky, right? I could make a little money back, right?

Where's dinner gonna be? A royal chop house, ooh, nice steak house. Nice steak house for the pac house, nice steak house. Nice, big expensive. They got the wagyu over there. Go to all the way to Pasadena, huh? Oh, yeah. That's a nice deal.

All the way to Pasadena. Everything is better than Pasadena. So the check comes, I'm like, all right, I'm feeling Christmassy, liquor-y. Okay, Dad, do you want to split this, split the check? I'm gonna go, sure. I said, all right, I put my credit card down.

And he starts peeling off a hundred and a hundred dollars. Mm-hmm. What is this? What do you mean? Because well, that's all I have. That's not even close. That's not even close to half. What were you gonna do if it was just you?

So then she came, she's like, here you go, check's ready. He wasn't gonna, he wasn't gonna give you over. Like, oh, you think he is holding out? You know, I think he had more money. Yeah, I think he just had a bunch of hundreds. So I said, the lady leaves, I'm like, what is this? What do you show up to dinner? You only have a hundred dollars,

and you go, well, I don't put two credit cards down. What do you mean you don't put two credit cards? So if somebody puts one, then he pays cash. And then he will only pay cash. And he goes, I see, sometimes I see five, six people put down a credit card. And he said, yeah, it's all controlled by the fucking computer. What do you think they're back there with an adding machine?

Yeah. Splitting up a tab between God forbid that they have to do five divide by five somewhere. What are you talking? If you've been doing this, if you've been doing this your whole life and goes, yeah, I always do this. I'm like, well, that's like that's like a hundred times that you've stiffed some me or one of us on a bill because we put down a credit card and you had this belief in not putting down two credit cards that only you were aware of. Yeah, never heard anything like it. I don't quite understand that.

Well, I gave up on it. Got stiffed for doing a nice thing. I know. I immediately told my sister about it. I was like, well, you have to be aware of this. Yeah, he'll do it to you. This is his belief. I've finally figured out why.

Right, right, right. Let's see, my Christmas party was a super spreader event. You heard about that, right? Yeah. I was there. People were thanking me for telling them, like I wasn't gonna tell them. All right, guys, it's not herpes, I'm,

well, I don't gonna keep that secret. Yeah, yeah, I don't care. Yeah. And then everybody's hoarded the, all the tests, like the instant tests. Did you see that? I mean, I get, this is what I'm hearing from you. People are driving around town,

like all night looking to get tested before they go see their family and there's no tests around. They think to stock up on rapid tests for the holidays, like nobody. No, because we thought that one through. Everything's like reactionary, you know, it's just like, oh, the core is melting down.

Oh, we should probably put some safety measures in place. Maybe get some lead jackets. Oh, nah. We'll order those when get some lead jackets. Oh, nah. We'll order those when it's too late. Right, right. Let's see what Mr. Girls' cone in today. Mr. Girl. Oh shit.

He's the I'm a pedophile rapper. Oh, he's great. Yeah, he got kicked off of Vouch. That guy Vouch, that big fat guy that has the fatter wife, kicked him off. He was interviewing him about the before and way before pictures. Yeah. Uh, I don't get it.

Yeah. He's not m-vouch pretends to be so offended by Mr. girl talking about, uh, pedophilia, but his wife is like 600 pounds. So what's a vaccine? Yeah, what is really obscene here? Yeah. You know, would you rather be a pedophile or have a wife that's 700 pounds? I think that I think the answer's obvious. Everybody gets to make their own choice, but.

I mean, no one's going to know what you said. You're in the voting booth by yourself, which one are you gonna be? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think the answer is pretty obvious. Let's see, Jack Murphy fucks up again. I can barely read this stuff with my one eyeball. Jack Murphy.

If you ever were talking about him, I do remember talking about Jack Murphy. God, he's getting even weirder. Yeah, see? You know, let me find my... Yeah, that guy, yeah, he's... Okay, I'm starting. Yeah, let me find my guy. Yeah, he's. Okay, I'm starting. Oh, I can read this one. All right. So he let me pull up some of my stuff here.

Buck breaking NFTs. These were launched. Oh, no. What is going on here? So you know, Stuntas got all his NFTs kicked out of open sea and everything. Yeah. They won't show you what they are. You can still own them and you can go to Mintable and stuff. Oh, you can, but you don't get to see what you're owning or what you're buying. We can't sell it on their system.

Okay. You can just kind of sell it on your own or on another system. You remember Tarek Nishid, right? Yeah. These are so tasteless. Tarek Nishid. Right. He's one who's fucking breaking the NFTs. These are, these are so tasteless. Turing Nishin, he's one who's breaking the root of T is

wrote the fanfic about gay, about homo erotic, uh, I slave sex. And he's got like this Irish looking, this tall Irish man, kind of angriest like with a sort of a collar. Yeah. And he's got his red headed guy has his hand like creepily. I can ask around a smaller a black, um, a teenage boy. That's not that's not a buck though. Is it? No. We're in a buck be like the the biggest strongest slave. I would think so. I mean, I don't want you to documentary, though. Right.

So this is allowed on open, this is fine, but Stone Toss is a little smiley face, guys. One of them happens to have a Confederate flag. Like they have a lot, they have all kinds of flags, not the Nazi flag, though. They have Confederate flag, like communist flag, which should be more offensive. Well, you know, thank God, good taste prevailed. Look at this. Look at how he's pointing at him. This is about, these guys are about,

he's gonna gay rape him. That's the next. Looks like he's pointing at the dinner too. That's like pirates of the Caribbean symbolism there. He's gonna, he's pointing at the dinner, like he's gonna rape it, but it's actually this little boy that he's gonna. Here's that, here's that. Okay, then this guy's the one, and he looks like he's gonna rape it, but it's actually this little boy that he's gonna. Here's a, here's a, here's a,

we get, and this guy's the one, and he looks like he's in the Matrix, this guy, this little black guy getting raped. And he's got, is that like the, the okay sign is like, oh yeah, you're right. You're right. Yeah. That's called the beard.

I don't know what that means. Then this is a, this is a Saudi Arabian, a Lawrence of Arabia rapist, same angry red head guy, but he's in Saudi Arabia now. Yeah. He's in Emirati, but he's white, I don't know how. And his other guy is like a unique, I guess it says. Yeah.

What's that talking about this? What do you think about these? This one's going. Wow. This one's going really. I don't know if I understand it. These are it's rape. Buck breaking that he's that the NFTs are. You can buy it and own it. He looks like he's plate, but a black he looks like he's raped. He's mad that mad that the guy is standing next to him and he looks like he's just kind of pouting. Yeah, sexily. What's going here is he's got, oh, this is a cop. I don't know. This one's autographed. Wow. Five, three, can you cheat? Have you done anything for you? I just breaking NFTs? I'm not sure what that's. Here's a red-headed guy with a big old Popeye. Is it a commentary on just societal things?

Yeah, it is. Yeah, that's what it is. You nailed it. Right. This dumb bitch online told me that my opinion doesn't matter because I have a stone-toss comic in my profile. Oh, sure. And I said, I don't have a, it's a stonetoss comic of me in the profile I got there. Right. You're a way, you're way, that's way under. Yeah, yeah. You're going way.

It's not a stonetoss comic. It's of me. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Way worse than I thought. Right. I must be like Satan. Oh, see you. Just having it is an infringement. Right. Do you know what I mean? Let alone me. Being the subject. Yeah.

Let alone being the subject. Okay, let's see here. Third graders were allegedly asked to reenact events from the Holocaust. Staff member has now been put on leave. That seems kind of funny. Tastes full. Let's see what that is all about.

What events do you think they made them reenact? Well, the person was put on administrative leave. So I'm gonna guess they were, they were marched somewhere or there was, she took it to fire, I guess. The Mary Go Round substitute it is for a train car. She was pretending to like play the violin and snipe at them. At the swimming pool. No, get away from me.

Students should never be tasked with acting out any atrocity, especially genocide or want them to practice. Don't they do like pretend shooter drills though? Yeah, but somebody goes through it, dressed as like a banana and goes like banana time. And that means they have to pretend to be dead. I've never heard that. But you never talked about that. Somebody has to act like the shooter, right?

I mean, it's probably not a kid teacher. Yeah, it's a teacher. Yeah, kid would, or that's it up, that weird custodian, which is unacceptable and not tolerated at any of our schools. The district said it was not an approved lesson plan. Oh, you don't say. Launched an investigation. Man, but they won't say what it was.

Yeah. I know. I want to know and I want to know, I want to know something about the teacher. What? I just want to know like who they are. Like what, you know, I'm always interested in, you know, if they're, you know, if they believe in this cause, if they, because usually people

who do something like that, that's straying from the lesson plan. There's plenty of things you can look at and read, and the Holocaust is well covered. That's why they have to do this, because they spend so much time teaching about the Holocaust That they have to start making it exciting are also the kids will tune out. Well, that's that's my I've gotten heard of before that's my problem with nature documentaries They're all sensational that they need to get you need to get higher and higher rush right they go generate sex They go down and they fucking they they dub in all these look out right behind you. Like underwater shit when there's a shark that's just like in the

yeah, they put in that swishing's out. Dude, it's fucking it's so embarrassing. Cause like, you know, cause like animals in nature and like new footage of stuff that's never been seen in that way before is not exciting enough. Yeah. It doesn't sell everything has to be so sensational. Yeah. I can't even fucking watch shark week. No, it's I can't. It doesn't sell everything has to be so sensational. I can't even fucking watch Shark Week. No, it's not. It's terrible. It's terrible for some years now.

That's what I call it. Have you seen Will Smith's, welcome to Earth? Terrible. Terrible. I searched for it, I couldn't find it. Yeah. I've seen a couple of them. What's terrible about it?

It's, I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it.

I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it.

I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't watch it. I can't, I don't want to watch the earth

and think about Will Smith getting cucked by Jada Pinkett's, like, I don't want to think about Will Smith crying about his wife cheating on him. Right, right, right. I can't watch. I don't want to think about it while I'm looking at the majesty of earth. Uh-huh, yeah.

All right, man. So did you like ever? Yeah. When did you find out? Did you get tasted? Another guy's dick on your wife's mouth. That's like cool. And if so, how did you identify it so readily?

Did you go like, hey, that's not my dick. It's not my dick. Did you watch the New Matrix movie? Speaking of Walt Smith. I don't even want, I mean, you know know what i'm pretty sensitive to spoil nothing anything to spoilers i spot all the whole movie on twitter is aggressively as possible because it's fucking terrible into one of the worst movies i've ever seen they should have found the guy that made that that directed the first one and said

that this lady will that direct this one what was going say, but like that, when they became women and forgot how to write, man, I mean, if you want it so bad and it's so, it's so Warner brothers too, they're making fun of how they think like the, when they say, oh, like, oh, this is how the industry works. No, but it really is. It's really, it's how you work. You know, you are this. Yeah. Is that other people doing this? No, but it really is. It's really, it's how you work. You are this. Yeah. Is that other people doing this? No, yeah. You're not. We're making fun of it. Yeah. No,

you're not making fun of it. No self-awareness at all. You're just taking like, oh, this will be hilarious. If we put our conversation about the matrix inside the matrix, it's not funny. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Change of pain. Playing a geriatric, right? I don't know why she was 90 years old. Yeah, yeah. That was weird. That does crack, I guess, in the Matrix. Yeah. It's so bad.

It's just so all the cut-ins from the original one, like side by side. Yeah, as the references weren't enough, they would then show it's like a 70s content film. Yeah, they would show the original matrix on a screen inside the movie. Yeah. Uh, yeah. Oh, it's, it's so bad. It's incredibly bad.

I had to do a double take when, um, when Trinity left her, first of all, she's getting her, her, uh, uh, back wall blown out by a new man and inside the matrix again. So already, Neo is getting cut totally unnecessarily. Like that's the, I did not need to see that. I did not need to know. I did not need to meet Trinity's new husband Chad inside virtual reality that she's getting banged in virtual reality.

Secondly, there's not a ass kid. It's not a ass kid. Secondly, when she leaves her, where her family, she's that she's been. Not a ask kids. Secondly, when she leaves her family, she's that she's been with for a sensibly 20 years, since the end of the first movie, right? 20 years ago, 15 years ago, she's been with these children and this man for 15 years, leaves them, leaves them at the end of the movie on faith

after three conversations with Neo at a coffee shop. And my thinking is, what woman, what sort of woman, so deeply understands a woman's bonds with her children that she would write this. Do you know what I mean? Like I've been noted in most brilliantly demonstrate the maternal bond a woman has with her children. It's leaving them over three conversations

at a fucking coffee shop. Are you fucking kidding me? This doesn't vote well for your cause. Hmm. Terrible. Horrible. Horrible. Absolute dog shit.

Okay. Let's see what else I got here. Real quick. Did you see the, what? Did you see the, the Penn State? I think it was Penn State, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the Penn State, the the trans swimmer who won the event by 38 seconds. Yeah. And just made me laugh.

I just saw the head like, yeah, it's like, there's like, you know, anonymous teammates have been like, yeah, it's not fair. It's just, it's not fair. Well, finish 38 seconds bar. And the the trans swimmer had competed as a male swimmer. Right. Yeah. Like for three years, right? I think so. Yeah. Switched gave it a switcheroo in the last. Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm. I mean, I don't know what you call that. It's just, I don't, yeah.

There's no, there needs to be a new word for that emotion. Like, what the, what the fuck are you doing? Why aren't trans people going like, can you stop fucking with the sports people? Cause they put people in, like they kill people. They flip over cop cars. They think they're invincible after sports. Stop fucking with them.

Everybody else you can fuck with, but don't fuck with them. They don't fuck with their daughters. They're crazy. People have killed referees. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, yeah. I saw that, that was pretty funny.

I just, yeah. Somebody didn't work showed me that. Here's a, uh, a funny. I just, yeah. Somebody at work showed me that. Here's a, uh, a, a, a, a, a,

a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a,

a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a like a like a 90s car alarm that says step away from the vehicle French factory workers could be forced to wear social distancing devices that emit allowed noise Like a dog collar if they stand too close to each other what dog collar has a standing what dog collar and it's allowed noise

Don't they zap you yes, they make a small noise. They don't make a loud noise. You stupid idiot. I don't know if they, well, they make a buzzing noise when it fucking shocks you. Really? Bad job. Badge worn around the neck or ways would go off around the neck. Oh yeah, because otherwise, you could lean in and talk to them and your butt would be way back and be like, really, yeah, trying that hard. I think this is real. It's really hard to tell anymore. What's real or what's not? Yeah, you gotta go to, yeah, you gotta search for it.

I found out that that, remember that fat card that said that you take to the doctor and you say don't weigh me unless it's really medically necessary to say bullshit. No, not only is it not bullshit, but it was promoted on CNN health. Great, just great. Yeah, that's wonderful.

I thought that was a good one. Third graders, reenacting events from Nahala Coss. I would go see that play. Ha, ha, ha. That'd be fun. It's the sound of music. Yeah, no. Let's see here.

Oh, here's another Jack Murphy. I mean, this one is weird. Do you want to finish reading that article that I was reading last week? You know, I was interested. I mean, yeah. He was just really, he was just really over the top with his like, he's the enlightened man. Yeah, he's really now has to, you know, bring everybody else along with him to come to his level of

a pack. Total consciousness. So I got that going for me, which is nice. Here's a, here's his take on, I guess this is like 15 year old girls. Is this before or after he, I think this is what he yells at the, this is before. Yeah. Fuck you for bringing that. Fuck you for real. Yeah, I'm fascinated is, but he yells at the, this is a broad, yeah. I fuck you for bringing that up. I fuck you for real.

Yeah. I'm fascinated with him because he seems like, he seems like a serial killer to me. Yeah, he sounds like a psychopath. Yeah, here we go. A mature, established 35 year old man cannot have a healthy, productive, fruitful relationship with a woman 10 years younger than him.

I didn't say that. I just think you just said they were immature and they shouldn't be matched up. 22. Okay, 22, 23, 24. Look, they're women mature. We're more college women mature way more quickly than men, dude. As way more quickly as age 15 women, they're basically women already. Cool. Right. I mean biologically as far as their prime in their 35. Why wouldn't a man in his prime latch on to a woman in her prime. Why not? That seems the most logical thing. That's what's

happened for millennia. That's what's happened for millennia. It's a little older men would marry like 15 year old. Yeah, I mean, why did he have to say it all? To make his point around he was he was trying to further his point that, oh, 22 is way old enough. I mean, they're, you know, they, they're fine at 15. Yeah, I mean, you know, the, all the Hispanic countries have it right, you know, it's a game. What the fuck are you talking about, dude? I assume he's there. I mean, on his clip,

for a third, there's no way that fucking guy's, you know, thanks, so him just looks old. Yeah, I know. He's 45 or so. I think he's in his 40s. He should have access to like a 22 year old. Is that what he's, he, I mean, you know, I mean, technically, I don't know what, I don't know who needs these points made. I don't know he's making it. It's a bad, it's a bad way to further his point that like fucking gross. It's a different.

It's a different way. He's making one. He says he says 22 because they mature much faster than boys. Oh, 22 is a mature woman. I mean, 15's a woman. He says in her prime. Yeah. They're 15 year old women are fucking retarded. Like children. They're kids. Yeah. You're going to have. You want to like just keep her in your house? You mean because like biologically they're perfectly capable of having a baby. Is that what you capable? I know that's prime. I don't know. Maybe prime for like listening to Jonas brother music. Why didn't she go a little younger?

Was that weird? So you're you're saying the distribution falls off at that point from time down on both sides. There's more. It's got a fucking weirdo. Being a younger woman is just jealousy. It's jealous. This is Tim Poole's show about the guy. Yeah, yeah. This is what these guys talk about. Yeah.

How they should be able to have sex with a younger, with very, very young women. Mm-hmm. Have we ever talked about that? No. Has it ever come up? No, I never. I mean, I don't think so.

Probably somebody will go, hey, you guys talked about, but. I can't imagine, I can't imagine who the demo for this content is. I guess this is if you're like popular in the right wing, this is the kind of retarded shit you have to talk about all the time. Maybe. Here you go. See, because as you said, every man in the world wants the data 22 year old woman. According to OKCupid data.

According OKCupid, I don't know, your own two eyes, all of history, every piece of life. I'm sorry, every book you're ever saw. Not day. Not day. OKCupid actually trashed all the messages. And they found a matter how old the guy was from even younger guys. Why do you think that is?

Always mentioning 22 year olds. Why do you think that is? I think evolution like biological reasons. Oh, right, exactly right. And what I'll get you to the found was that, very disgustingly in my opinion, men are actually attracted to women much, much, much younger than that.

Okay. But I would not want to have a family with someone younger than that. So men choose 22 as the... All right, all right. Let me see if he says anything else. Yeah, okay, here we go. Who's Jack?

Oh, kids, of course, dude. Well, that's a hyperbolic on my part, right? But there's literally nothing wrong with seeing a woman of fertile age and thinking she is an attractive sexual partner. I'm afraid I can't own that. I'm afraid I can't reach. Ah, he's going down.

Yeah. Oh my God. What a fucking weirdo. You gotta gatekeep everything. Keep these fucking weirdo. Yeah, he's a fucking. Guys a little off. Okay, let's see here.

Off. If I can read the rest of his article and then see when Mr. Girl gets here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is he not around? Let me see. We've never talked to him before, right mr. girl gets here. Yeah, yeah, is he not around? We have we've never talked to him before right we talked to him. We did. Oh, yeah, he's here. Let's get him on Hey, mr. Girl what's going on? Are you there? Hey, yeah, I'm here. What's going on? How are you doing? You're having like a big Interview tour it's been awesome. Yeah, I know I and I to this conversation just now, I was like, it's everywhere.

This discussion is everywhere. Yeah. I want to say I try to stay away from it, but I guess I don't. It's just fun watching people so uncomfortable with it. It is. Or not uncomfortable at all. Yeah, and here I am. Yeah, I mean, you invited me here. So you're obviously not trying to stay too far away from it. But yeah, I'm in the middle of the lefty civil war between destiny and Vosha, I guess. Yeah. What is it? What is that civil war if you had to describe it? From what I've understood, Vosha's girlfriend clipped destiny, saying something about how the BLM rioters are

hurting the movement so much so that if that means that right wing nut jobs need to mow down rioters until they get their act together or something like that. I don't remember the exact quote, but it was some hyperbolic joke about how basically the writing and looting and shit should stop because it's hurting the movement. And then I guess Vosha's girlfriend tweeted this out and then it went viral and then Destiny got punished somehow, do you partnered from Twitch or something?

God. That's what I heard. I have not verified this, but that's for some reason the two of them hate each other now. Yeah, they're always going after Destiny. Yeah. Yeah, so I talked to Destiny about gender stuff, and we got along pretty well, and we didn't really agree with each other totally, but we, I think we had an uncharacteristically civil debate, even though we disagreed with each other, which is his,

you know, fans enjoyed. Then I went on Vosha's stream and we, it really didn't go that well. We talked about, I said, I emailed him, I was like, you want to talk about pedophilia, BLM, or gender. I feel like those are the three things I've been thinking about a lot. The only Trinity. The only Trinity. The one who, yeah. What are your thoughts on gender? are the three things I've been thinking about a lot. The only Trinity. The only Trinity.

The one home. Yeah. What are your thoughts on the gender? Is it like the trans stuff? Because I saw you talking about that a lot. Yeah. Yeah. Trans, trans issues are trans women, really women. I think that you and I are probably pretty much on the same page from what I've, what I've heard from you about. Yeah. Obviously, I'm a little more gentle in how I talk about it. You, you like to rip on people a bit more than I'm a little more gentle in how I talk about it. You like to rip on people a bit more than I do, but I think I feel good. Yeah, it makes you feel good, right?

And I appreciate that about you. But deep down, I think our views are probably pretty similar. Like if I'm going to a bar with my friends and one of them says, hey, can I bring my friend? It's a trans girl. I would say, yeah, totally. But if they said, can I bring my friend? It's a trans girl. I would say, yeah, totally. But if they said, can I bring my friend, it's a genetic girl. I'd say no.

Right. Yeah. You're going to have a worse time. Yeah. At the end of the day, hating women is the main thing. Yeah. I understand. You get this show. I get it. I get it. I want to play your clip of getting kicked off a voucher show.

I think it's so funny when these fucking dorks act like something is like so offensive. Number one, because you're on the internet. So like, what? Where are you, dude? Yeah. But then number two, like, like, vouch specifically doesn't constantly talk about really gross things. Yeah, he actually believes. There's no way he's offended by this.

Okay, I'm going to play it here if I can bring it up. This is vowsh by the way that sounds like a human Xanax. Oh, okay. I don't know why he talks like that either. Here he goes. Well, I mean, you sound like a pedophile, not a person who wants to promote empathy for socially misaligned people. What do I sound like a pedophile?

Because you're dedicating a considerable amount of thought to the subject of what type of underage girl people would be most interested in. What color, if you have to guess what color their underwear would be, Vlas, what do you know what we're gonna say? Yeah, okay. I'm out. That's what he can tell me.

I mean, you sound like a pedophile. That was so offensive to him that he kicked you off the show. Yeah, I guess so. I mean, the weird thing to me is I was making fun of myself. I was saying like, oh yeah, like it would be creepy if, you know, I was being super weirdly specific and rather than actually presenting a hypothetical to you, I was actually just slowly devolving into talking about my sexual fantasies about children. I thought I was making fun of myself, not trying to like freak him out or anything.

I don't understand. I mean, you're clearly joking. Like in the video, you're looking around for like a punchline, then you find it and you're smiling and making a joke and just the tone of your voice is like an obvious joke. It's clear to us and what scares the ever-l living shit out of me is that it's not clear to a lot of people these days. Yeah.

Vouches fans are fucking crazy with the amount that they don't understand. Just humor in these times, social media, really hyperpartisan stuff, it's really shown that humor is not everywhere. Some people just don't understand. I think one thing that's happening with streamers like Vosh and Dick, your relationship with your audience is actually kind of different from this. But I think a lot of fandoms feel very protective.

So I think there's a weird dynamic going on where I don't think they're actually that upset with me. I think they just feel very protective of the optics and not wanting him to look bad and not wanting him to get criticized or anything bad happened to him. So I think that's part of why because after he kicked me off, he was just went back to quietly playing Metroid and like, like, like, like, like, like, you really would rather watch that than the conversation that was just happening.

Like, I get it. You don't like me, but like, this is objectively boring. Oh, yeah. Is that what he's playing, I thought he's playing like Sonic Spinball. I was watching this. No, he was playing Metroid. And then I think the other thing that happens is, I rewatched it, but reading the chat

and then it becomes clear that he's actually really talking to the chat. It actually, I don't think that, what anything I say is really steering the conversation. Yeah. And I think it's going before that, he kind of decided it was time to get rid of me. So once you change the conversation to,

let's talk about age of attraction and how to handle that, well, protect children and stuff hypothetically to are you a pedophile? I think I don't use intentionally derailing the conversation at that point anyway, and I probably was probably getting food from that person. I thought Destiny, either today or yesterday, say that he puts even odds on either on vowsh, getting a credible pedophile accusation level at him as you. He puts- Which is kind of nice thing to say because I guess the assumption is it's 99%

me, but even odds is not really that much of a compliment or a defense. He's definitely, he's been very supportive and I appreciate it, but I think he also still has that like, you know, doubt in the back of his head. Like, you know, it would be really unfortunate if Mr. Girl does come out as some kind of horrible predator pedophile. A lot of people would look bad. A lot of people would look bad. You might even look bad. And maybe. Yeah. The blast might even reach you. It might even send your toenails a little bit. Oh, were you gonna say Sean? It was just just that video I still think about how fucking funny that was and how obviously I don't understand. I just it's so foreign to me that people flip out about shit like that.

I know because it's so absurd. Yeah. Uh, I think it's like if you don't want to talk about it, just say that. I emailed him saying, do you want to talk about one of these three topics? But it's like, if you can't admit that you don't want to talk about it, just say that. I emailed him saying, do you want to talk about one of these three topics? But it's like, if you can't admit that you don't want to talk about it, and then you just think, well, it's fine, I'll just manage the discussion in a way so that it doesn't make me uncomfortable.

If you fail to do that, then that's not really my fault. I've read something about your, they also say that your girlfriend is like, that you wouldn't let her go on HRT or something like that. What is that for? Well, is that in the joke? No, that's a true story.

We've been dating for a couple of weeks. I tell this story. I usually don't tell too many stories about my relationship, except we already told this story together in a video. So this is not like a secret. We've been dating for a couple of weeks, and she was pretty androgynous then, like she would wear like backwards baseball caps and shit to our dates and dressing like a dude generally. She didn't really try to ask for for they them pronouns, but a lot of people

around her were using they them pronouns. And I think she used them for herself, but she didn't ask me to. But she did her name is Shaylin, but she did ask me to call her Shay. And I was like, kind of masculine. Yeah, I was like, no, I'm not going to do that. Like you're a girl. And then she also was like, I want, I Yeah, I was like, no, I'm not gonna do that. Like you're a girl. And then she also was like, I want, I want to be your partner. I don't want to be your girlfriend. Cause like we, you know, okay.

So after we've been dating for probably two or three weeks, cause like we immediately basically were like, kind of in a relationship as soon as we started dating. Okay. So she'll take the girl parts of that. Uh. Yeah. So she said, I'm thinking of taking a low dose of testosterone because I think it

would make me more comfortable with my body. Really? I feel like I'm not exactly just a woman. I feel I'm non-binary. Her identification was that she's non-binary and I want to take a load of testosterone that some people are doing a lot of women are experimenting with this. Wow. Why did she think that would make her feel more comfortable? She'd think the testosterone would make her feel like. She wants to fight MMA.

I don't know. I actually thinking back to the conversation, I think. Like opening jars and stuff. Did you think it would make? Did you think it would make her stronger? You know, I think the idea was just that her, I think the idea a lot of trans people have and like liberal, like on narrative about it is that your gender identification and your brain is somewhere on the spectrum between male and female. Okay.

And so non-binary people feel like I'm kind of in between, and this is not all non-binary people, but I think the theory is my brain is not exactly totally female, but my body is totally female and that's bothering me. So I want to make my body a little more male or so my body is physically non-binary. So I'm actually more, literally, androgynous and somewhere in between. And I think she's doing that with clothing and so she's like, I don't want to just do

it with clothing. I want to do it with my actual body. Mm-hmm. And I think that the testosterone will like balance the scale kind of in this. I think they just think it will give them some more, it'll lower their voice and give them some more muscle and body whatever. It'll more chisel jaw. I just think that she liked the idea of her body becoming more masculine.

Okay. All right. You don't have to work out quite as hard. Yeah. No, you don't. I see myself as a much stronger man Transitioning to a straighter man, so I take some so I take Crete and for that. Yeah, sure Sure, yeah, so every I mean yeah, it's not uncommon to take you know drugs or supplements or whatever to chain your body so I said I

Was like listen, I think this trend shit is a bunch of horseshit. I care about trans... The same way I think religion is a bunch of horseshit. I think most people are delusional about one or two or three things that I think are insane, and this is just one of them. It's no transphobia. I don't hate trans people. I'm not afraid of them.

I care about them. And I have a lot of issues with how we talk to them and about them. But so that's how I talk about it in public. And private with my girlfriend, I'm like, hey, this is a bunch of horseshit with a fuck you talking about. Yeah. And I said,

Leave this shit at the front door. Uh-huh. Yeah, I said, listen, I think you hate women. And I think you hate yourself for being a woman. And I don't really want to participate in that. So if you want to call, you can call yourself fucking like Melvin, I don't care what you name you give yourself. I'm going to call you Shaylon,

because I believe you're asking me to call you by a different name for reasons that I don't like. Usually women take out that self-loathing in the bedroom. You know what I mean? I think they really do. Yeah, I see what you're saying. Yeah, like abusive, like degenerate sex. Like choking and slapping sex. Yeah. Right. Abusive slash degenerate slash good.

and slapping and slapping and slapping and slapping. Right, abusive slash to generate slash good. Yeah, so I said, I basically, I wanna like, I want you to think of, see this from my point of view. So I said, listen, I can't control what you call me. You can call me your partner. You can call me your girlfriend.

You can call me whatever name you want and I'll call you whatever name I want. I'm not trying to say that like I get to dictate the terms of our relationship. I just want to draw a boundary and say, like, you can't control how I see you or how I talk about you. And I won't do the same. And then with the hormones, I was like, I strongly don't want you to do this. I think that when you are dating somebody, you have some ownership over their body. Yeah. So, if I start cutting my fingers off, I'm hurting you, right? It's not just my body anymore.

Like, we own each other's bodies. Yeah, people will be very upset at what you're saying, especially the way you're saying it. Well, you get to leave. Right, but it's also like, hey, do you want to have sex? And they're like, no, your first, your reaction should be, oh, what's wrong? Like, if you went on the streets, you're like, you want to have sex, you said, no, you went, what's wrong? You need to go

to prison, right? Right, right, right. Exactly. But what, what one it's with your partner, there's some, it's a different title to their body. You have an entitlement to sex. You don't have an entitlement to sex whenever you want. Yeah. But it's a sexual relationship. So if the person says it's an implied contract. Yeah. I mean, it's kind of explicit. Like if you say, if you say to your girlfriend or partner or whatever, Hey, I just decided I'm never going to have sex with you again. Like you've basically ended the relationship. So you can, yeah, right. Yeah. So it. Yeah, right. Yeah, so dating, it is a sexual relationship, which means at some point you have to have sex if it's going to continue to be that.

And then there's like desexualized relationships or where you just cuddle. And then there's marriages or whatever where it goes on for years where I think that actually can transform where you're sort of like domestic partners and you are running the family together but you don't have sex and it's like I guess if you haven't had sex in years then the expectation of what the relationship is would have like transformed. So I understand that. Yeah, but you still can't cut your own hand off without seriously negatively affecting the person who cares about you.

If you came home with bangs, you'd have some explaining to do. Yeah. You know, I get, like, hey, don't freak out. I went a little while with my hair, the hairdresser went too far with the hair dye, which I know is a lie, right? I go, they do this every day and they fucked up. Okay. Sir went too far with the hair dye, which I know is a lie, right? I go, they do this every day and they fucked up. Okay.

Yeah, you'd have some explaining to do anyway. Exactly. And so on the spectrum from bangs to cutting your hand off, taking testosterone is a lot closer to physical, self actual self mutilation than a haircut. That would be a big deal. I can see why everybody hates you now too. Yeah, no, that's, there's a lot of changes. hormones make a lot of changes in your body.

I mean, that's a big one. That story just sells like, wow, I can see so many, I can see so many posts just related to that one, like deny someone their journey and their expression and their identity and the patriarchy and male toxicity and like gaslighting are into thinking that this is a joint, that you have joint ownership over somebody's body. Exactly, right. Yeah, I understand why they hate me too, but I'm like, listen, you're, maybe you should

look in the fucking mirror and think about what. Also, I think another thing was I was like, it's, because I'm a personal trainer. So I was like, hey, it's okay to hate your body. That doesn't mean you have to fix it. And it's okay to hate women too. Like that doesn't mean that you have to do anything about it. You can just sit with that or you could like, you know, go to fucking therapy and try to figure out why I feel that way.

Instead of, I think progressives are way too into, if you have any dissonance or discomfort, like what can external, what can externally happen to resolve that right? What can fix it? What pills can I take or what can I inject? Or what can other people do? If I'm uncomfortable in my body, what if everybody just told me I looked a different way

than I do and maybe that would fix it? Yeah. And it doesn't. Yeah, I would start with the what's going on inside rather than like, well, and it's the way you put it, it sounded like, well, I think this will help me align. It's like, there's not a whole lot of thought going into that necessarily. That seems like kind of a drastic step

to maybe hopefully align the exterior with what's going on inside, but why don't you figure out kind of what's going on inside first? I mean, does she kind of know? Like what people think too. Like if you're like, oh, you better call me these pronouns and stuff. And some's like, no, we'll do it or else.

I'm like, all right, I will. You're telling me that you believe it now? Like that's good for you. Right, or are you just, yeah, are you just placating me? Bullying them? Is it the bullying that feels good? Because I think that's part of it too. I think it reminds me of of when your parents are like,

hey, come sit down at the table for dinner. You've been blah, blah, blah, sit down, we're gonna have a nice meal. And it's like, what is nice about that? When you just explicitly set out loud that I don't wanna be here, and I don't wanna talk to you. And you know that. Yeah.

But we're going to present. I think for some reason it's still, I think if the person who is telling you to do that operates that way themselves and they view most like nicety and pleasantry as sort of like a forced performance, then I guess that makes more sense to me. If they think like, well, no one is ever genuine, so just say this, and they just give you a script of what you're supposed to say, then I guess that's maybe that's,

they feel like that's the best that they're gonna get. That's an interesting thing you said. I forget why I came across it this weekend, but it was somebody saying how the comment of Let's Go Brandon, the meme of Let's Go Brandon is such a statement on the civility of our society. And my thought on that is always, well civility for the sake of civility is responsible for all the greatest evils, like the collective evils. Murder is just evil, but it's just one guy. Like when you're killing millions of people or like stealing their time or their wealth or

their fucking kids, that's done by civility. Like that's done because people are going to stop the guy who won't stop the guy who won't stop the guy like, well, I didn't, I don't want to rude. You know, like that's the great collective evils happen. And it's the diffused responsibility on an ultimate scale. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's the lubricant that evil uses to just spread and be unstoppable. Yeah.

I think that's deep down maybe some of the reason that everyone bristles at the pronoun shit. Because like everyone knows that all this civility and acquiescence to things that are, that we know are like stupid and not important, eventually cascade into a giant catastrophic failure that fucks damn it. That's why they always bring up 1984 because it's not, what scary is not just the civility, but the punishment. Like, if you don't say, please pass the mashed potatoes, if you just say, hey, hand me the mashed potatoes at Christmas dinner or whatever, or Thanksgiving dinner, you, nothing happens to you if you don't do that.

And so when you do it, it's polite, but it's also like, some of you might get like a dirty look or something, but it's not enforced. The pronoun shit, it's framed as hey, just be nice, but also if you're not nice, you're gonna be in deep shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and you should be in deep shit like you you deserve the worst. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Um, yes, good point. Well, have you, uh, have you learned anything talking to these guys?

I really, I look at these, these like political commentators, like, uh, Hassan, Piker, and Ethan Klein, uh, Vouch, and, uh, got even on the right, Tim Poole, Jack Murphy, comic Dave Smith, I saw him sing some wild shit. I see all of them as an extremely toxic, corrosive, and very stupid contention of commentators. And it's worse for me than the news, because the news, everybody's kind of has always known that it's like just a guy reading the news,

like trying to be, you know, a Mr. Friendly guy. Yeah, he's just right. He's a talking head. But these guys are purely, uh, identity, all they are is their identity. Like all they are is their political identity. I understand the way they, the way they react as like an organism when it's being attacked when another idea comes along, the way they circle the wagons, like the way Tim Poole has Jack Murphy on to like run a screen for him and protect him from the and they're talking about winning a culture war. Tim Poole is talking about winning a culture war and the same breath as he is like not making fun of this wild, cook article that this hilarious, cook article that this idiot, that would cost him nothing to

talk about. I don't know. Do you have any thoughts on that since you've been dealing with these guys for so long? I think, yeah, the organism thing definitely resonates with me. There's something... So, one thing I've just found myself thinking about earlier today, it's like I'm working on a video about NFTs as you know. And I'm working about a video. I've got like a couple projects in mind and I'm trying to figure out like what's next and like what to finish next, what to put out next.

And it's most of the discussion about me now, like what people are talking about, about me, where suddenly everybody's talking about me, it feels like I know that it's not that big, but for me it's pretty overwhelming. It's just about me. And so I was thinking like, I can see how you could just, I could just make a video about myself, just about like the mystery of my, is here, isn't it? Or whatever. And like me and Vos and Destiny and commentary, whatever community or whatever political discourse talking heads

and how they're fighting each other. And like that would be rewarded for that. Yeah. And I can see how that snowballs into, I could just, you know, six months from now, I could realize I'm only just making videos about myself that people then react to with videos about themselves and then I make a video about myself.

And then it's like, we're not actually fucking talking about anything. Nope, it's interesting to me, the core conversation at the heart of this fight or whatever. Yeah. How do we deal with people being attracted to minors or any even pre-pubescent children to the extent that that is common and I assume it's a bell curve rising as children get older and go through puberty.

Obviously, that's generally more attractive to people. How do we deal with that when we also hate talking about it and feel like talking about it. It's everything. Whoa, yeah. Yeah, and it's scary to talk about because the more you talk about it, the more it seems like you're one of them. Right. And then age of consent and morality and protecting children from abuse and like how do we discuss that, but we're not talking about that at all.

And so it's also not profitable to talk about. Like whenever it comes up, whenever that cutie shit comes up on this show, people write and say, don't talk about that again, I stopped listening at this part. Like it was a fucking, you know, to use a word, I kind of hate it, fucking triggers them on some level. Yeah, something, they just hate hearing about it.

Yeah. You'll get demonetized for talking about it. Sure. And like for, what is that, like, what is it like to be, made hearing about it. Yeah, you'll get demonetized for talking about it. And like for, what is that, like what is it like to be like in 10 years when whatever kid is getting groomed or abused, here's this, they're gonna be angry. They're gonna be angry at all of us for being like,

well why the fuck wouldn't you talk about it? Like how are we supposed to stop it if we can't? They're like, oh, sorry. It was gonna hurt my audience if we talked about it too much. So we couldn't really try to figure this out. Sorry, bud. Yeah, it's all posturing to say how much different

you are than the other guy. I'm this, like I think I get what you're saying. I'm just like, this is about, I'm this, and this guy goes, well, I'm this, and the actual conversation, never really happens. And it's like that about everything. But what's scary is that that's what the audience actually wants.

So if you're a streamer, you have this chat that is constantly pouring money all over you and adoration and praise and attention. And they're steering you toward only talking about stuff that they want to hear about or talking about yourself. And so they want to hear you call Mr. Girl a pedophile. That's what they want. Give it to them. Come on, Fauci. Give it to them. Give them the all. Exactly. Give them the one to look. The idea of spending like 40 hours a week with people just complimenting me

and telling me to talk about myself and giving me money is pretty fucking attractive. Like I have to say, there's some partner, some like sociopathic party. Well, kind of, I mean, everybody likes to be validated on some level. It's a, you know, compliments are sickening to me. I don't know why I have that. But you're a psychopath. I think that's really amazing to be able to say that, Dick. I think you're a great guy.

Yeah. I don't like it. I don't know why. I'm the king at bristling at compliments. I've learned to, I've learned to take them because it's for you. You're basically telling somebody you don't know what the fuck you're talking about. You're an idiot. It's a pain. No, I know. It's someone. The compliment is it pains them and they have to give it. So you have to take it. Oh, it to them. Also, I had someone say I saw your debate with Destiny and I thought it was really great, but I would subscribe to you, except you offer no prescriptions for what we should do about any of the stuff you talk about. So, I'm not going to subscribe to you because you won't tell us what to do.

And I was like, Jesus, fucking Christ, that's terrifying. It's terrifying that have that increasingly, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it,

that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it,

that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, that you know it, like pro mr girl and like yeah I I'm afraid of myself well it's like the ring and Lord of the Rings I'm afraid that I will want that power and it's crazy them telling me new people saying

just tell me what to do. Really? Yeah that freaks me out. Oh wow, I can see that. You're pretty. You like to put a lot of thought into stuff? I try. Yeah.

That's funny. I forgot what I was going to ask you after you started talking about that. So, you know, rap music. I hope so. Yeah. Do you have a new album? Yeah, I have a new album. Well, yeah, it came out 16 days ago. So it's still new, right? Yes, very new. Where can I go? Listen to it. I'll play it a little bit after you.

It's on Spotify, YouTube music, wherever, wherever music is sold. Where do I go on YouTube to find it? YouTube.com slash what? Mr. Girl YouTube.com slash Mr. Girl. I have one video that's the whole stream, but then you can also just search for Mr. Girl boundaries, the album is called boundaries and it'll come up as like the YouTube artist. Is it, is it I kill pedophiles? Is that it? Yeah, I kill pedophiles. I think that's that's that's that's that's probably like the second like single off the oh shit. Get away.

Okay. I kill pedophiles. You looking cool. And some pink pants and old. Thank you. That's a illustration by Shaylin. My girlfriend, uh, my partner. I guess we're just stuck in a eternity of people telling people what to do.

They need to, now it's just keep watching. That's the solution. What should I do about this? We'll just keep watching me and getting upset by it. Nothing will change. We'll never get to the actual issue with the other side. It's far too subtle and nuanced for anybody to really be able to pay attention to. And, you know, I think that's a defeatist attitude.

I don't believe that. I think that we can talk about it with the other side. And I think that one thing that we should, I think we should try even if it's very hard and even if we get called a pedophile or whatever, but I also think that I, so I don't want to be enemies with Vosh. So Vosh is like sub-tweeting me and increasingly calling me a pedophile and saying, my painting's question was weird and whatever. And so I made a video saying,

I'm listening. Yeah, and I said, listen, like I understand you're protecting yourself. I get why you want to do that. But the door's open. I still want to talk to you about this. I still, even on some personal level, I get why you want to do that. But the door is open. I still want to talk to you about this. I still, even on some personal level, I still like you. Like, I don't dislike you. I don't hate you. You're not my enemy. And like, I've been telling my followers,

like, guys, this is not like, we're not going to do this. We're not going to war with Vash. Because I don't want, I don't want that to happen. I'm sad to hear you say that. I like that. I like that. I like that. Unfortunately, I think as a society, we are moving further and further away from that kind of discourse happening. There's a lot of wrong direction.

I was just making fun of his fat wife. As soon as he called you a pedophile, I just spent like two hours making fun of his. Yeah, I know. I know you did that. I don't know if you wouldn't do that, but I know that's just how you are and you're gonna do it.

I can't stop you from doing that. I don't wanna encourage you. I don't want that. I don't know if you wouldn't do that, but I know that's just how you are, and you're gonna do it, and I can't stop you from doing it. I don't wanna encourage you, I don't want that. I don't want to make fun of us. It sounds like he's waking. Yeah, I hear it. No, I don't want to wake you up. I'm just... I'm the motherfucker.

I genuinely don't want to make fun of people. There's bodies or whatever. You're saying it weighs you down when I make fun of us. Oh gosh, that's fat one. It's like you have a huge load on you. Jesus. Wanging down on you.

It, I like you, Dick. And I want people to know that I like you. Oh, that's nice. I like your content. I think you're a good guy. But when you make fun of Vosha's wife's body, it makes it seem like somehow I'm making fun of Vosha's wife's body, it makes it seem like somehow I'm making fun of Vosha's wife's body. And so I don't want to condemn you,

but I also don't want to be people to think that your words are coming out of my mouth. I understand. Do not want you to cut your hand off. Yeah, I don't want to tell cut your hand off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I don't want to tell you not exactly. I don't want to tell you what to say or not say, but I also, I'm very pro-civility. I think especially when it's surrounding like a topic that I think's important and there's some like political rift.

Yeah, yeah. Did you hear, did you hear Comic Dave Smith talking about getting a girl wasted and who didn't want to have sex with them? And I saw your tweet about that, yeah. Oh, dude, this is fucking horrible. Talking about people who just have no business telling an audience what to think or say. This fucking jackass who's on Dave Smith, who's on Legion of Skanks, which I think Louie Gomez is the star of the show.

He's just like the girl, the female voice on the show. He said, his hypothetical was, you take a girl that you know doesn't want to have sex with you. You get her 12 shots and then you fuck her and his response is a crimey a river. And I said, am I thinking, is that's called rape? Well, I mean, I, I, I'm somewhere in between. Yeah, okay. Um, because if you, if you see the thing is, it's the no-win, but no-

A man has a hard time having sex when he's incapacitated to the point of not being physically functional or awake. Okay. A woman's body can still have sex if she is unconscious. Right. Right. So if you know that, and we all know that,

and you knowingly incapacitate yourself in the presence of somebody who you also know wants to have sex with you, and that person is the person who is giving you the drinks with which to incapacitate yourself, encouraging you to do that, I'm not saying that that is not rape. Yeah. If you pass out or it become extremely wasted, like 12 shots is like blood alcohol poisoning for most people. Yeah. That's a lot. Yeah.

In a short amount of time. But I think that is less rape than pulling a gun on someone and- Really? See, this is what I see a lot of people saying. I don't know why I see it so clearly. Like, well, no, that's not only is that rape, but that's how most rapes happen. If nothing else. That is how most rapes happen.

I agree with that. Like, you can't, if so, okay, I'll get you this one. Let me give you this one. That's what he said. That's what he said. He said, I'd be very disappointed. Really? I'm like, you'd be very disappointed, bro, that's fucking rape.

If you go, I mean, are we assuming the person has a normal alcohol tolerance and they are, they're, I mean, yeah, blind drunk. I mean, the point was, the point that he was making was the girl doesn't want to fuck you. So you get her loaded to the point where she can't say no, the point where she does, where they lick her,

and he's saying don't drink it. And the, in a scenario is that she, she is then saying yes because she's so drunk. And you know that she's only saying yes because she's drunk. And we're saying she's not able to consent and more because she's drunk. Correct. Or is it that she fell asleep and then you like, no, the fuck.

He doesn't specify. He doesn't specify so I'm graciously saying that I need to know for I'm saying she's drunk and allows it and maybe not explicitly yes, but she's not unconscious and I'm saying. Okay. I'm saying that if you do that with if you went into a bar and got somebody so liquored up that you bought their car for a dollar, the cops would be showing up at your door the next day going, Hey, buddy, how about that car? I'm like, well, you know,

are you sure? You said right here. No. That's true. But what I guess might, ish, okay, so I agree with you about the morality of doing that, and that it is wrong. And so to that extent, it is rape.

It is rapey intentions, a plan that you executed and pulled off, and you ended up having sex with someone who didn't want to have sex with you. My issue is the culpability of the victim. I want to do some victim blaming. Yeah. So if you go to a car dealership and you want to buy a car and they say before you buy this car, would you like a shot? Yeah. And you're like, sure. It's a free shot. I'll take a shot. Would you like 11 more shots? But just before we go over the paperwork, would you like to have 11 more shots? If you say yes, that's on you.

I'm not saying no, I don't think I agree with you. I'm saying it's a kind of one-to-one analogy here. It's a perfect analogy. I'm not saying that that's totally on you. It's wrong to try to get someone shit faced before you get them to sign a legally binding contract to give you whatever, have tens of thousands of dollars. That's wrong. And so ethically, the rapist or car salesman is doing the same thing. They're both wrong. But for some reason, you, the victim in both scenarios, you know not to do 12 shots before you buy a car. Yeah, you do. You do.

Right. But it's the same situation. If you're on a date or you're at a bar or whatever this scenario is, you understand that if the person is buying you a shot, it's because they want something from you and the thing they want is to fuck you. And so you know that you are being coerced or applied into fucking them and yet you are doing it anyway.

And so when I say victim blaming, I don't mean like she should know better because people don't know better. It's normalized. I think this is where the civility thing comes in, where it's rude to not take the drink. It's just passed off as like a fun thing to incapacitate yourself to the level where like,

if you were in a hospital, they would be like, oh, we need to get this person in IV because their body is in trouble. But it's just normalized and the bartender will keep serving the drinks and everybody around you will keep laughing and then you can walk out with the person and no one will think anything of it. So I get why people allow that to happen to themselves. But I guess the difference between that and the gun and the parking lot is like,

it's reasonable to assume if you go through to a parking lot. You're not like, obviously anybody's putting themselves in some amount of danger, but it's a very miniscule amount that we accept as normal. Yeah, but there is no reason to incapacitate yourself and put yourself under the control. You're basically turning yourself into a toddler who is utterly helpless surrounded by people who explicitly want to fuck you. Well, first of all, I don't think that analogies are good arguments because they're using them, like building alternative realities, only limit, like they're good for explaining things, but I think they're explicitly bad for making arguments because they're built on

so many assumptions. Like you go into a car dealership, you go in there to buy a car. In the scenario that he said, it is you explicitly know she does not want to have sex with you. So however you engineered getting her licked up was done for the purposes of violating what you already knew she wanted. That's not a part of your relationship. You want a good deal. You know what I'm saying? To me, my understanding is there is no way to serve someone a shot of alcohol or multiple shots of alcohol where they are not already in a situation where

they know that you want to have sex with them. How is that? I drink with guys all the time. I don't want to have sex with any of them. I've got them drinks. I'm drinking. Why? You know, all right.

I'm going to play this song. I kill pedophiles. Does anything make you a rage? You know what? I'm gonna say today. What? My own temptation to make a cult. That's what I'm angry about today. Okay. Boy, all right. I hope you do. I'm not going to Joshua tree and have a nice make sure you make sure you're going to make a call get more girls and it then guys. That was my mistake. We just have guys. Yeah. The intentional call. It's a sausage fest.

All right, Mr. Girl. Thank you for calling in. This is I kill Tartified This is my I just want to say I'm a good one You too Okay What do you think Sean, do we figure it out? I'm not sure what we figure out I kill pedophiles because I'm not one What questions then, Anne? Hello there Paul's off with a sought-off shotgun

And if their victims end up being in the children I kill them Yo I kill Nazis I kill people who talk to Nazis I kill the paparazzi who shot me, trying to dox me, I kill Antifa I'll teach you to protest peaceful plus I kill police who beg people with less lethals Yo if you kill black people I kill you and if you are black, well I still do I kill Jews depending on what side they're on Plus I kill kids taking pictures of the dicks that's child I kill pregnant women at abortion clinics And I kill the protesters trying to storm in it

I rape racist, then cast rape, rapeists, who else? I kill trans people if they fucking try to kill themselves Please don't do this This guy makes good music Please don't do this Dude, this guy makes good music I just don't hate me I'm American as Apple I'm so sorry Didn't mean to make it lose your mind The dream is over

Fuck you, bitch, I'd rather rip out my eyes Dry drunk High strong, only time I'm fun is right after I come And I fuck once every five months, and times up, past hat times up Might be your body, but it's my cunt, what the fuck you think I hate them so much I'm Trump, and this YouTube channel is just mine, come I'd rather breathe cyclone, be then bite my tongue Used to want a murder conservative, I ain't proud of it

Back home being, Republican ain't proud of it Back home being, Republican wasn't allowed, wasn't I spent my life in closet, now I'm coming out of em Your friends and family, they don't really stick around Cousin funny, when your heart brings it doesn't make a sound Does it pick up the pieces, Max, get yourself some counsel And now I don't bow down, found out how to be loud Fuckin' a when you cow, it's round me, I'll make sure that there's a crowd watching

Please don't do this I don't wanna watch you cry Please don't hate me I'm American as apple pie I'm so sorry Did it mean to make it lose your mind The dream is over Fuck you beach I'd rather rip out my eyes Please don't wanna watch you cry, please don't hate me All American is apple pie, I'm so sorry Didn't mean to make it lose your mind The dream is over, fuck you, bitch I'd rather rip out my eyes

Mr. Girl, I'm not a real man I'm not a real man, I'd rather rip out my eyes. Mr. Girl, I killed pedophiles, the song. Justin Sun, these fucking people complaining about the new South Park, do you not get it? That we're all living in the future and it sucks cocks. Thanks, Alexa, and China owns everything. You're complaining about Jews and Gays

doesn't change that fact. And also Cartman is literally Jesus. Go fuck yourself. Did you watch the South Park? I've only seen half of it. At first half? Yeah, the South Park has so good. Is it?

Oh my god. No, I have to. Yeah. People are upset about Cartman's ending. Okay. But it was perfect. Okay. And if you watch it, you'll know,

you'll know why immediately. I watch it over at somebody's house. I don't have a, does it paramount plus you have to have? I don't know. I'm tired of that. Oh, yeah, okay, I'll do that. Yeah, I need to see, okay, I need to see the second half because he puts his faith in God.

Nikki's ex, I called you a honky as a joke on YouTube. And YouTube removed it for racial slurs, informing you that you can no longer say the H word. Okay, well, good, that's a racial slur. Benjamin Stone, fat watch, hey, Dick, I'm in the airport in Jamaica and they have stupid mask mandates when there's fat woman that gives Lizzo a run for her cake

was told she had to put a mask on, she put it on her face and then it immediately ripped because of her fat neck. No. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, fat watch. Uh-huh. Fat news.

Okay. In lesbian says we need an obesity passport. I love getting the fat news updates in the podcast. I read this read this article today and was thinking myself, I would love to hear what dick would have to say about this. Thanks for not killing yourself. Elizabeth, this is restrictions on an obesity passport from RT.com. Let's see, restrictions, vaccine, obesity, passport. Yeah, that would be great. The latest argument for vaccine passports that we have to increase vaccine uptake to reduce pressure on the health services. By this logic,

we should also consider restrictions for those who are overweight. Sure, I've heard this before. Yeah. Yeah, obesity is a fucking huge problem. Yeah. The biggest problem is in America. Causes everything. I mean, that's why, you know, heart disease, that's why, you know, heart disease. And you can't get any of your preventative stuff paid for by your health insurance, right? Like, if you want to eat healthy, you can't get a bump,

you can't get a little bit of money to make that happen. If you want to go to a gym, you can't get that paid for by health insurance. But it's never going to happen. It'll never, this obesity shit, it's like a pipe dream. I know, this is- It'll never because people are just too fat. This is-

Yeah. This is why it's of, you know, it's hard to have hope. Yeah. I mean, maybe I can give you some hope, you know. Maybe if we could convince, like, with the 1%, like, we got 99, we got everybody to hate the very rich. Maybe if we could just get everyone to hate the very fat, like the 1% of fat people are causing so much devastation. Well, I think you're doing your part.

I think so. The 700 pounders plus are overwhelming our health system. I mean, we gotta be on top of them. No healthcare for you if you're over 600 pounds. If you don't own a pair of sneakers, no hospital for you. Yeah, they have more problems than any group, I think. And then we just gradually whittle it down, right? Yeah.

Now if you're 650 pounds, no hospital for you, 600 pounds, no hospital for you, get all the way down. As soon as the women rank as light heavyweights in men's boxing, you're less than five pounds away. I don't sell Excel shirts for women in my store. No. Did you know that? I have to go through and uncheck the boxes.

Do you? I don't let them order. Oh. And then if they email me about it, I say, well, I'm sorry, it's just not, I don't sell extra large. And your name is going on a list. And Hamst going, and now you're blocked. You know, if it was up to me, that's just the store policy.

Yeah. That's what I say. It was up to me, I would, but it's store policy. The initial case for vaccine passports was as follows. Everyone is scared shitless. That's the case for vaccine passports was as follows. Everyone is scared shitless. That's the case for vaccine passports. But they're never, they're never gonna do that. Would it be good if health insurance,

if you had to pay for health insurance, is like for risk factors? Would that be, well, are we ever gonna do that? Like if you're drinking like a maniac, or you can have to pay more for health insurance? Traditionally, like, if you're a, you know, if you're, I mean, life insurance, sort of, they want to know if you smoke or not.

I mean, that's, yeah, that's, smoking's pretty bad. I don't know. I guess people don't really work that way because all the people doing the vices know that the people who aren't doing the vices aren't going to fuck them over. Right?

Like just because of their behavior. Personality. Yeah. You know? Well, I think you guys are, because you're not so fat and a mess, you don't have like, you have this empathy thing going on that you're never going to fuck all of us over with. I don't know. Benjamin Stone. Oh, you're never gonna fuck all of us over with. I don't know, Benjamin Stone.

Oh, anywhere that one. That lost rage. Hey, Dick Judas here. Here's what makes me a rage. Have any of you people talk about how they can't lose weight and how no one, no diets work, etc. Um, more diet stuff. Okay.

Dating Black women from Shiba Hacksaw. I sent an email a couple of weeks ago talking about people not wanting to date outside their race. I figured I should follow couple of weeks ago talking about people not wanting to date outside their race. I figured I should follow up on the dating black women and such. I'm surprised you've never been with a black woman before. Maybe you should try and get a large, breasted black woman on the show to comment on dating. Maybe we should try to do that.

Yeah, got to find one. Right. There has to be some dickhead willing to talk or can hook up an interview. Well, we'll see about that. I want to say thanks for all the dating advice over the years. It helped me get a woman who was way out of my league. Wow. All right. Pretty much hitting the gym and getting good at saying what women want to hear is all it really takes apparently. Regardless of race or culture, she has F cups and an athletic build. Mama Mia. I guess my first

journal tip to any other dickheads in the dating scene is trying to pick up black woman is to use any pickup lines or comparisons to chocolate while talking to them. It's what I've learned from movies. I think that's true. I have no idea. I remember walking down the street in Hollywood with this super hot black girl and this bum shouted out her that she was a stallion. She was a stallion? Yeah, and he was black, guys. I said, well, maybe that's does he know that she likes that? It is she not like that. Oh, did or did he think that she had a dick? Maybe she's talking to me. Hmm, could be. I don't know, but I said, I don't know if I would ever try that calling a yelling at a girl that she was a stallion

I'm not calling any girl a stallion. Certainly not screaming it. No But she was laughing She laughed at it. Yeah, sure. So maybe second is to she probably fucked them second Second is to never touch the hair unless you ask. Oh, okay. Oh So that guy is never touch the hair unless you ask. Oh, okay. Well, why do white women want to touch the black women's hair so much? What's wrong with them?

That's always, I think it's racist. I do too. Like, because they don't walk around touching each other's hair. I do too. I think it's like, I really think it's racist. And they're almost like, oh, I've never, oh, fuck, never, never, never, never, never had anything like this before. Yeah.

It's a weird chick like dominance thing that to try and colliate them. I fucking believe that, right? Like all hair, you know, it has different properties, but it's made out of the same shit that like everybody's is. No woman has ever, like I walk around my pubes out and of women don't come over. Oh, let me get over my hands.

Right, right, dig my hands into that. It's always struck me as very weird. I'm like, you're giving that person so much credit. You're giving that person credit for thinking that telling them to ask to touch hair is the problem here. You know what I mean? What the fuck is wrong with you? Not kind of the underlying thought. Yeah. What's the impact on you? I mean, I'm not going to be able to do that.

I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm not going touch hair is the problem here. You know what I mean? Right.

Like what the fuck is wrong with you? Not kind of the underlying thought. Yeah. What's the impulse coming from? It's not that. Yeah. Something is just go home and don't come out of your house until you don't have this need to touch black women's hair ever again.

Well, let's, let's go back to the conversation with Mr. Girl a little bit, where it's like, you know, maybe don't need to jump right to fixing yourself externally. Like, maybe find out about maybe what's going on in there. Like, why? Yeah, is it, are you, when you come to that conclusion, is this really how I do feel? Like, why do I feel like you need to touch through here? You know, if you, you can always, you can always do it if you find out that it's like, yeah, I think I understand more

and I, and you know, I do think this. I do. I need to touch the hair. Uh huh. Yeah. Uh, the only issue is trying to date black women is that many will not simply date outside their race and are likely to ghost you. Oh, that's all of them. If you are anything other than black,

due to social pressure from family and friends, oh, really? So like a black guy and you know, talk like, like, you know, poorly and you like study, like study books and stuff. Is that real? They can make fun of. Yes. I mean, yeah. Or they're ostracized from, well, sometimes you've, if you come from a certain area and like, yeah, people wanna like better themselves and do it, it's like... Every community hates that though. Yeah, every community hates that. So yeah.

No, there's absolutely a thing, you know, I mean, there's gonna be some people who it's not cool for you to date outside your race. Like it's not, you know, for sure, for sure. What a pain in the ass, due to colorism by black men. Oh boy, mass incarceration. Black men willing to date outside of their race and attitudes of pulling for blackest stand,

expected of black women. There is anywhere between three to six million black women in the country with no hopes of really getting a black partner. Why is that? If you can find a black woman, especially dark skin, and she's open to dating whites, they tend to be some of the chillest women.

You will ever date. Black women in trying to pursue black men have to put in way more effort with sex, appearance, education, et cetera, due to this disparity of men to women. Really? There's a disparity, but like black women outweigh black men.

So that's a put in all this extra work. Like in New York, women are way different than in LA. Okay. The gender dynamics is totally swapped. Yeah. Like LA, there's way too many guys. Right. You go out, it's all fucking soft party.

New York, it's all women and they're all having fun, having sex in the city. Yeah, and they're all right, right, and the fucking loserist guys get fucking women way out of their leaves. Yeah. It's true. Wow. I don't right, right. And the fucking loserist guys get fucking women way out of their league. Yeah, it's true. Wow. I don't know, man, does the prison statistics have anything to do with that? Well, they're not helping.

No, they're certainly not helping. I just want to, it's like, how many is it written? Like how much does it upset the scale? How much does it upset the male female balance much does it upset the male, female balance? We need another black community. Get rid of these men. Just get them fucking all out of here. If you can get over the skin color,

black women will tend to be over the skin. I think he's talking about the white skin color. I hope he's talking about the white skin color. You're out, if you can get over your own skin. All right. If you can get over the skin color difference, I mean, I don't know, yeah, whatever. I mean, I think he's got a black girlfriend, right?

Yeah, so he's the expert. I mean, he's got experience. He's got a boobies too, dang. Yeah, sure, sure. Damn, dude, okay, let's do some advice and then voice mail and get him out of here. 145. Dear Dick, I tore my dick.

Oh, hey, Dick and Sean. Oh, hope you're all there Oh, hey dick and Sean. Uh-huh. Hope you're all are having a good day. Okay. It's Van Gogh Tango. I wrote in, uh, oh no. Well, I wrote in, um, I wrote back two years ago an episode 179 on receiving blow jobs from another guy

without it being gay. I remember this vaguely, me too. I've been in the Navy for a year and not succumbed to any say no more He gave me seeds Like two months now. I've been dating this cute Haitian girl who's also in the Navy. Oh my god. Get an STD test No, just kidding. Same ship is me short squishy ass with supple 35 B cups I thought they only came in even numbers, buddy.

Well, not dating for a while. We are both stricken with horny high school hormones. You're gonna ship with the girl you're banging like a Navy ship. Mm-hmm, fool. I guess where we all have been and with our stuck on a ship with our girlfriend for the last two years.

We're both stricken with horny high school hormones and wrestle every weekend. Dread a triple H until I'm shooting dust or she can't walk straight. Oh, God. Due to these love making sessions, I started feeling a sharp pain under my dick and discovered that I tore my freinulum.

The freinulum or banjo string is the small string under the penis where the four skin meets the head. If you didn't know. Okay. Yeah. Similar to the string under the tongue connecting to the roof right at the floor of the mouth. Right.

Right. We've tried taking sex slow, but after penetrating anywhere further than an inch, I feel a sharp pain and have to stop out of fear of tearing it more. Healthline.com suggests it should fully heal after two months without any vigorous pain as activity. Okay. Oh God, that little fucking deal. Yeah.

Is your pulling on it every time? Yeah. Yeah. She says she's willing to wait that long. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She says she's willing to wait that long. Yeah, right. But I know, damn well, her and I both want to get down and dirty as soon as possible. I can jerk off successfully if I take it slow from the right angle, but sex may be a more complicated procedure.

How do you think you jerk off from the right angle? I don't know. So some kind of a topical solution that can jerk off with like a numbing agent, like only three sides. Numbing agent that only numbs that area. Well, then you're going to make it worse. If you num it, no, I know because you're going to, yeah, you're going to go batch it. That's a horrible idea. I know, but you know, he's got, he's got decisions to make here.

No, I know. No, really, you know what he has to do. I mean, he's got a way for it to fit a meal, but he's looking for any,, he's got decisions to make here. No, I know, really, you know what he has to do. I mean, he's got a way for it to fit a meal, but he's looking for any out to where he doesn't have to do that. Well, it's just the pulling out part that's bad, right? Because if you shove it in, it's not going to, is that going to tear? Well, I don't know, doesn't it get tighter? The penis?

Well, I mean, where that string, I'm gonna have to do some experiments. Yeah. Take it slow, but sex may be a more complicated procedure. Four play is only so fun, and every time almost leads to actual sex. We haven't tried blow jobs yet. Yeah, that's gonna be even worse. So that's where the tongue is. There's two banjo strings. Yeah, you got to mess with. How can I bite the bullet and go as long as I can being absent keeping this girl interested? Or should I try again at sex with every chance we get and risk tearing my dick off? That's kind of a choice. Are you really writing into advice for, look, just try, should I just do it? Dick said to do it. I'm shoving it in and then don't move.

It's the pulling in and out. You're all sure, you know? Yeah. You could just, please said he can't even get in more than an inch. Without the pain. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. You could get one of those, like the strap-ons that we have in the studio to put over your dick. Okay. Right? Yeah. I mean, look at that thing, Sean. It's like about a Yeti thermos size penis. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So it goes around your own penis. Right. And then you strap it on, and you're banging her with like a hollow wiener. Okay, she might enjoy that if you're trying to keep her around. It's not going to be ideal. Does, I don't know if he's using to keep her around. It's not gonna be ideal. Does I don't know if he's using condoms or not. Does that help at all? Oh, man. You know what I mean? Yeah, I guess I don't want to be on tape Advising someone to use condoms though. Yeah, I mean, you know, I love the show. Keep up the good work smooches for Sean go fuck yourself. Love a vango tango

I Think you're gonna have to do that. Either put it in there like your Amish introduced, like Amish role play, sex, Amish role play, where you just stick it in. You just fucking the back of a wagon. Yeah. In your ship. Build a little wagon in your ship.

Yeah. And you just stick it in and you're not moving around because moving around is like enjoying it and it's ungodly. Right. Or do the hollow penis. I think with, can she grow a beard? Good question. Right.

I think with some medical tape, you tape that thing down, start at the P hole and take a long KT tape. I think it's called, can that be a tape? Right, it's a stretchy, it's elastic tape. Yeah, they use it for sports injuries. Yes. So you started the P-hole, put a nice thick piece of KT tape, kinetic tape, is it KT tape or KT? I don't know.

Whatever, it's stretchy tape. Yeah, put it down the P-hole. It comes in a bunch of colors. Put it down to your balls and then give it a wrap around the bottom. You got to double, you got to reinforce it. You're okay. The weiner. And that should protect your freinulum.

Yeah. I think that's it. Tell her to not complain. Tell her it feels weird. Let's see. Advice needed. Hey, take a jump. If you read this on the show, just call me Dr. Jay.

I'm an upcoming PhD student who goes to a large public university in a heavy left-leaning city of which I have attended for over five years. I currently have the inside track to a well-funded position with many connections for a seamless transition to a six-figure salary. Wow! After graduation at this school, if I choose to stay, all of this seems like a no-brainer to stay put. But recently, administration has heavily implied that booster shots may be required like a no-brainer to stay put. But recently administration has heavily implied that booster shots may be required for it. Oh, god damn.

Fucking booster shots for young people. I have already been coerced by the administration to get the first two shots and refuse to take a third. Okay, let's stop right there. So the rest of this letter is performative or masturbatory. Why? Because... There you got it.

No, because that's it. His higher education stops right there. I refuse to take a third. Yeah. So anything he goes on, how important is that to him? Yeah, I think that's what he's asking. Is it a deal breaker?

It's just, that's a pretty definitive statement. It should also be noted that this administration also requires masks in all indoor spaces and outdoor events of 50 plus as well. Fuck. This along with the mega-cucked student body pushing, for even more restrictions, has me thinking what is right

i have an option to move to texas for a smaller worst program that would require moving thousands of miles away from family and sacrifice a lot of the connections i made in the five years previous uh... do i trade near guaranteed success for my sanity texas not gonna fix your sanity. Believe me, there is no, there have annoying things there as well. Sure. Do I trade near guaranteed success for my sanity

over the next four years, knowing there's always a risk of this Texas University changing course and requiring all this shit as well? I mean, Texas has way more annoying, like go America military shit that you're going to have to do when you get there. The mask stuff depresses me instantly. Well, maybe he, you know, maybe he aligns more with the maybe he likes in a go America thing or whatever.

I don't know, man. The only thing I would say make sure you're making your own decisions. Yeah. That's it. I mean, do honestly, like if you feel like this is, this, this is a fork in the road for you. Yeah. It's unknown whether, you know, either one probably sounds like more likely. One is going to make you take the booster than the other. But if you're, if that is your principle, yeah, it, it, what's it worth to you? What's it worth to you?

Just weigh all that, weigh all that, do as much fucking research as you can, real, make, just make your own decision. I would. It's your life and you can't blame anybody for if it doesn't go, I used to, you could still blame. You can, but you're, can't, but you're wrong. That's still got everybody's fault. He didn't say if it's happened to me,

if I had to get vaccinated or whatever, I would try to do it like fake it first. Well, yeah. But I don't think everybody's doing that. They're all saying like, well, I either, no, have to get it or not, but they never say, they never make it clear how much of faking they've done to get there. Because my experience with people at work is that they don't check shit. Like you can put, I was fucking president. I was the fourth president of the United States

in your resume. They're saying, well, I mean, he was president of the United States. It's got to be a good solar panel salesman. Yeah. I mean, he's really, he's down, you know, and he's well under his qualifications. Wow. I don't know. What am I supposed to know who the fourth president of the United States was? He said it on the resume.

Yeah. Nobody lies. Nobody, nobody lies. Nobody lies ever. And nobody lies and says, I'm telling the truth. So as far as I, if you, whatever your dilemma is, it is not a problem until you've exhausted every possible lie that will help you in that scenario. And then only then do you have to start asking yourself hard questions.

That's my general life philosophy. See if you could get around it. See what you can, I mean, that's what I would do. I can't say what you should do. I don't know what the legality of it is. He may have an ethical problem with like lying. I mean, you know, then I mean, who does that serve? Go get vaccinated.

If you have ethical problems with lying, get vaccinated however you want. Maybe it'll cure that. I don't know. And that once I've exhausted every possible way to lie about it, I'd probably just get the fucking vaccine. Or I care moving my house, doing all this shit. Oh, maybe I'll have a heart attack.

Oh fucking well. I'm not choosing this goddamn heart attack vaccine where, fucking well. I'm not, I'm not choosing this goddamn heart attack vaccine. Where to draw this? Not heart attacks. But I'm not choosing this to make my stand while I'm signing over 40% of my income as taxes. And make and do and heroin is illegal. Like, oh, oh, wow, I have to inject a fucking experimental vex of like a fucking vaccine that I don't want. Whoa, this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me. This is boy.

Well, and this goes back to how important, what hill do you wanna die on? This could be the most important thing. Hey, I feel like this is one of my last freedoms that I'm giving away. It could be deep sea more. Don't worry. So, they'll take away a lot more.

No, that's the thing. And it sounds, it's very much a young man's idealism. And I get it. Yeah. I get it. Just make sure you've done everything that you can to make yourself as aware as you can and make a decision. I don't know if, you know,

don't cut off your nose despite your face. Uh, if that's, uh, applicable in that situation, just I would hate for, I would hate for you to look back at 35 and go, what the fuck was I thinking? You will anyway. Well, yes. Yeah, you will. Uh, whatever you decide, potentially like a big one, whatever you decide. But this side is potentially like a big one. Whatever you decide, find people

who will tell you you decided correctly. That's funny. I mean, I don't know. People on the right are so anti-vaccine. They're like, oh, you're not gonna, oh, I bet you'll take it. Like, oh, I bet you're gonna take it. So what? It's a big pain in the ass not to take it.

I don't personally want it, but it doesn't really cost me anything to not get it. Right. Well, you're, you're, excuse me, it cost me nothing to not get it. Right. You're a different, right. Your life is set up a little different. Yeah. And I'm a liar.

Like I enjoy lying. Yeah, I know. So somebody was like, give back to him. I'm like, yeah, you know what? I'm like, well, let's get it. Let's get it. go. Fucking signed. How about this? What do you need for proof?

Well, we need your card. Okay, I lost my card. Right, shit. Oh, I got into the bottom of it. Yeah, yeah. Well, I like work, work, work, work. Just be a pain in the ass until they say, you know what, never mind.

Like you can get so, you can get so far in life of just being the worst dumbest pain in the ass that anyone could ever have to help you. So it won't come to help you. Yeah. Oh, sir, we're gonna have to ask you to move. Oh, sure, I spilled all my fucking, I spilled all my food and my drinks all over the place.

Oh, man. I bet you didn't see that one coming, you dumb idiot. Yep. Oh, we're gonna need to see proof. I washed, I bet you didn't see that one coming. You dumb idiot. Yep. Oh, you need to see proof. I washed my proof, right. What do you recommend? I washed my dog. What do you recommend I do?

Yeah, what do you officially recommend? Right, right. Make them work every single fuckers, because they'll just give up. They'll give up because people are on the ass. Yeah, eventually somebody will go, ah, fuck it, it's not worth it. Call this, you know? Yeah, there's so much you can do. There's so much you can do.

So much you can do. Or not. Or just get it. Yeah. And then, you know, tell people you didn't get it. If it, if that's in place to you. Right, if that's your circle, right?

Sure, sure, sure. Again, right. Right, yes, yes. That's what I would do. sure, sure, again, right? Yes, yes, I would do. Yeah, I have not got it. If I did, I would lie. Well, sure, you keep in a narrative. Okay.

People keep narratives in their lives. Farce, you gotta keep that narrative. Everybody, these are the Dixio page on our website. So, see you next Tuesday. Presenting dick. I'm not sure if I can do it. I'm not sure if I can do it. I'm not sure if I can do it. I'm not sure if I can do it.

I'm not sure if I can do it. I'm not sure if I can do it. I'm not sure if I can do it. Okay, here we go. Said no one ever. They boondocks have been showed with the way they're doing. Makes me look like Dan Crenshaw. Based on Johnny Rebel. And your mistaken, his songs are actually really, really funny. I'm a what? Who's Johnny Rebel?

Johnny Rebel, he sings racist songs. Does he? That's who the boondocks guys. I mean, I know that Johnny Rebel has been a name that's been used over the decades for it. He's a real guy, I guess. That's what the Boondocks guys. I mean, I know that Johnny Rebels has been a name that's been used over the decades for he's a real guy, I guess. That's what that got. Well, I mean, is, yeah. Oh, you're saying it's like, uh, turn Ferguson, like just a name that people use.

Well, I think it was even wasn't that even used to, wasn't that used as just like, Joe Q public, but for like a Confederate soldier. Maybe. Let's say like, yeah, yeah, when Johnny Rebels comes, you know, blah, blah, blah. That would be why he uses it then. Yeah, no, exactly. It's, but yeah. Okay. Uh, here we go. Get you a little high. Jesus. Oh, my gosh. And it don't last week about your girlfriend, your wife, your hot out for another man

noticing and, you know, yeah, all right. You know, everyone knows she's hot and thinks she's hot. It increases your status, right? And when someone offers to buy her a drink, she politely says, no, thank you. I'm out with my husband, slash boyfriend or whatever. Now I like to politely remind me of a fucking rage like two months ago. I was at the Renaissance festival. I'm talking up this girl and I was like, hey, can I buy you a drink after we're talking for a minute. I mean, and she goes, yeah. And then, you know, keep talking, her friend, you know, cuts her away and they go through, treat back to their boyfriend. I'm sorry.

Like what a front. I'm gonna hit her away. I thought, I forgot. Great for a reminder me of this. Fuck you. Oh, so she accepted the drink and then we got counted away. I just want to stop and pot just how funny that actually is.

But I've never heard it use that way. I mean, it's so descriptive. Yeah. It says so much about the other person without seeing the clearly anything else. It's very funny. Very well done. Content away.

I love it. Well, there you go. That's not going to use it, but it's funny. I'll try to use it. That'd be a hard to want to try to use. Well, he just tossed it off, which was why it was so funny, too. Yeah. He's like, you're just saying, you know, whatever.

I'm still annoyed by that, getting a girl too drunk to consent argument. I don't know why, because every time I bring it up, people will give me some explanation that is not what was described or said. That's a place where I agree with you. Analogies, they're always a little bit off. Yeah. So it is a, it's, it's a unique analogy.

It's a unique situation that cannot be covered by analogies. They just miss the mark. But it kind of can. Well, like, I know you don't want to do something. So I got you shit-faced and then tricked you into, tricked you into showing me your penis. But you had a problem with the car analogy. Like, it is different, right?

That's different. Yeah. But that's what I mean. Where's the easy way to say? You have to look really hard to find an analogy that's exactly parallel. It's it. And I already understand the thing that I'm just not. I'm not. I know. It's not. Why? Why does every and an annoying me because the guy Dave Smith, he's an intellectual like asshole, which I don't like, but whatever. There's a lot of those. He says libertarians shit, but I don't think he understands really anything about being libertarian,

which annoys me, but whatever. There's a lot of those dummies. It's that when he got called out for saying, for describing rape, he instantly went to, well, woke feminists are offended by my joke. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that's what happens to me, dude. Yeah. Yeah. We're not the same. I don't think I don't think purposefully getting a broad Wasted on liquor and then fucking her is legal or cool. Yes. We're not they're not attacking you for that

Mm-hmm. They attack me for that shit. Not you. You just an idiot who an idiot who doesn't understand what rape is, I guess. I don't know, I can't explain it. Every fucking, oh, that's just woke for, well, yeah, so people having drunk and having said, that's not what you said, though, you shitbag. Just say you, say you don't mean what you said, and it's over. Just say I fucked up.

That is clearly bad, and illegal. What what I described but this is also a different problem. No one cares about that problem because a bunch of hacky right wing versions of Hannah Gadspeed just endlessly vomit the same string of talking points. Oh, these woke feminists are blah blah blah blah blah. Okay. Hey, I heard the guy talking about assumptions of Dragon, also Haitian. Last week's episode, and I just want to say that it's kind of dumb and pointless, and I know it feels pretty bad right now, but remember that you don't have to be flated through like a corporation that's just trying to like sell you ship. The reason we're doing all this is because the D3.5 exists and AD and D exists and the system is perfect and they don't need anything else. You know

and there's because of how the games work there's you know it's a 4-game man. You could just you could just make up on stuff. What is he talking about? The engines and dragons. What is he talking about? I don't get it. Can you explain what he's talking about? I'm sorry, buddy. I think he was just saying that you don't have to...

Is he kind of saying that you don't have to play Dungeons and Dragons? I know that. Right, right, right. Or, you know, that there's, I don't know, like, you could make it whatever you want. Is that amazing? Yeah, you know, versions of it or something. I'm not really, not really sure.

Maybe I've been playing too much, you know, AD&D. Oh, you play AD&D? Yeah, well, what is AD&D? No, I mean, like a, it's no attention deficit disorder. Oh, AD&D. AD&D. Yeah, that's what you've been playing yeah it's left the hyper at i put a

replacement is actually a thing you didn't know about it he i think he mentioned it in the now that i think about probably i'd have replaced the um... you know the uh... the the age with an ampersand so k lessy that's why the system's a beginning progressively easier and easier to understand and left you know the classes are getting less specialized and you know everything's becoming great because they're going to

help you because you've already purchased the 3.5 books and they don't care about you anymore. They're trying to get for new people. Yeah, I know. Right, I know. So he's talking specifics about updates and you know, and why are they trying to give us all a good news? I don't know that world at all. I've never, I've never played.

Well, you know, I don't even know if I really understand the engines and drags. Like just people just kind of like using creativity to kind of like make up what can be done to from one character to another to me. Like you're in a fucking, this will be like Dungeons and Dragons. Like you're a wizard. You're in like fucking, this will be like Dungeons and Dragons, like you're a wizard. You're in like a someone's studio. What do you wanna do?

Right. There's like a computer, some Diet Coke's washing machine. When I have a Diet Coke and shoot someone in the eye with a Nerf gun, and now you gotta roll to see if you drink the Diet Coke. Oh, okay. Roll a dice. So if you roll a one, you spill the Diet Coke

all over yourself. Like an idiot. Yeah. Yeah. How embarrassing. And there's a goblin comps in and drinks it. Ha ha ha. I think I'd be good at Dungeons and Dragons.

Have you ever played? You've had to have played when I was like 10 years old. Yeah. I heard it was all about Satanism. So I joined thinking that. Then of course, it's where they always go. Wegey boards. Satanism at all. It's just nerds. It's this gay stuff that you tricked me into. God damn it. I mean, there must be. Tricked into gay stuff again is what I said.

There must be something to the game because I mean, like millions of people find, you know, what's fun? It's like pretending to be. And you got your little guy that you can like try to level up, like a Tomagotchi, you know, people have grinding on that shit. And you learn all about like monsters and stuff that doesn't exist, cause the real world sucks. You're like, oh, this world makes sense. Well, I get good at evil. Yeah.

That's why they're making fantasy. That's why everyone's so pissed, cause they're ruining the clarity of the good and evilness by making it all like a mishmash of low-course shit. Yeah, I can't leave this in escapism. I have this in the real world. I have this shit. A lot of times by people who don't understand the world anyway. Yeah. Oh, my wizard has to pay child support. Amazing. Yeah, awesome. Hence not understanding the Spanish language. The Latinx stuff at all.

Yeah. Okay, let's see one more. Oh, these are two good ones right here. Hey, Dick, you know what makes me a rage? Oh, hi, Sean. Hey. I love you. I'm trying to make sure a drag queen make me a rage

and hear me out. Okay, drag queen are fun. I love drag shows. I can't blast. You can't have a trans sexual drag queen. Everyone involved is a good, good time because it's no girl's allowed. It's a guy club. It's a guy thing.

It's just dudes being dudes fucking around and waving their fake vaginas at each other. Having a pussy fight. And then you bring women in. Women ruin everything. You get them all the time sexual women in there. They're making fun of them. They guys love drag shots. Yeah.

It gets too emotional. Everyone takes the two serious ways. Wow. It ruins the fun. It ruins the fun because drag queens are kind of like circus clowns Everybody hates a serious clown. I want to just know is this clown fucking around? Yeah, he's fucking around It's a clown. It's a good time But when you get that clown who comes out there it says no, I'm actually

Seriously, I'm a funny person. I love George Carlin really funny. Look at me dance dance with the circus elephant. You're like fuck. What the fuck? Scares me. I don't want a real clown. That's like it shit. Uh huh. Do you think he's drag on this guy?

Go fuck yourself. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. No, I don't think so. That voice mail is a trick. And then he's gonna say something shitty. True though.

How you gonna have a drag queen show where it's a trans, is it a trans man? Okay. You in drag? Trans man, so. Chas Bono. Yeah, it is dressing up like a big fat lady. Yeah, then it's just like a man dressing in,

that's the same. I mean, sure, I mean, is it exactly the same? Well, it depends on who you ask. So that lady that won the swimming contest, the swimming meet, she could do drag, she could put on like a mustache and stuff and do like a drag king show. Does that exist?

Yeah, women do drag too, where they dress up as men's things and do it. Yeah, sure, it's just, I mean, I like it because it's not funny. One is obviously way more popular than, yeah, than the other. Like you've been to drag shows, right? Yeah, great.

I have. I've been, uh, yeah, I had a good time. I've been to probably like two or three just over the years. Mm-hmm. Here's my problem. I'm sure this is not all of them out there. Mm-hmm. But what I'm always left with is this feeling that everyone is really into

it because it's a guy dressed up as a woman and laughing extra hard at things. Here's my I don't. The ones I've seen are just not that talented. Oh, they're really well respected in the community. And I can't remember names, but I'm like, what do you mean? I'm like, if you were as talented as like Elton John, or somebody like that, I'd be like, drag. Okay, that's fucking impressive. No, just somebody who's just very, very good at what they do.

I was, how do you be good at drag? Like you just look like a material. No, I mean, the comedy. Yeah, the whole show. Just wasn't that funny. Or just that, it didn't take that much talent with the writing wasn't that good and any of them but people are like falling all over themselves Yeah, I'm just like you just just take it forget about what they are or or not or whatever like I'm like

Okay, you are objectively not that talented as the adoration that you are getting with lead one to believe So it's like now I'm canceled. I do like a karaoke, like Eliza Manelli will come out and do a song. That's not as good as wow, Eliza Manelli could do it. Right. Of course. Okay. I always thought that they, like that was the audience, what they like to see. Like they like that it's crappy. A little crash and burn. Yeah. Maybe some little bit cringes. Maybe some people do. The only problem is it's, it's close to being it's, it's good. It's good. It's not great. Okay. I had the best audience making the best audience making fun of guy. I saw a drag show because they all really, those guys will really lay

into the women sometimes. Oh, the drag queens. Yeah. Yeah. Like the hoes. Oh, man, because they're all there on bachelor at parties acting like total idiots. It's obnoxious. Yeah, they're there with their husband. Like there's so much resentment.

It's just in the room. It's like a powder keg of ripping on wind. The women think that they're it's a safe environment, right? So they're not going get, if you, if a guy made fun of a woman like that, even in like a dinner with two people, she would start crying. Even with 12 shots.

Yeah, she would start crying. Yeah. But you can do it at a drag show. Mm-hmm. That's shot thing really fucking annoyed me. Maybe I'll talk about it more next week. All right, everybody. See ya.

See ya, thank you. Maybe I'll talk about it more next week. All right, everybody. See ya. See ya, thank you.