The Dick Show - Episode 318 - Dick on Chub Rub

Episode Date: July 26, 2022

How to Stop Monkey Pox, my pirate bed, TV sex changes, dial 988 for suicide, running your A/C, sharing a stage with Dave Chappelle, the woman of the year, Abbott and Costello, conspiracy theories by ideology, plus sized travellers, Chub Rub, NYC vs. water guns, and pretending to be arrested; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

I sent Randy a message I met for 80s girl. No. Oh, this is bad. We've all done that, but it's, it's the golden. I can't believe the signs in, in what is in the message. No, no, it's too bad. I got sent in a picture of the dog. Yeah.

She was away. She was out hiking with some of her friends. I was really laying it on thick. So you're just giving him so much ammunition. No, no. No, no, no. No, no. He was meeting me at the, he was meeting me at the, you rust again.

Like oh God, please God, how Randy likes to follow rules when he's not, please God, tell me he doesn't text and drive. Right, please God, tell me he doesn't text and drive. Right, please God, tell me he doesn't text and drive. I don't know why. No way. Wait, what? No.

So I get to the bar and say, I need a grabby phone. Well, let me just grabby phone. I'll click on any of the checks out that any checks and he's like, why are you really trying to, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's why I said. Oh, it's too much. Ah. Let me see your phone.

I don't want to leave it out there. No, no, I got, you know what, I had stupidly's too much. Ah. Let me see your phone. I don't wanna leave it out there. No, no, I got, you know what I had stupidly on my phone? I had a picture of myself as the lock screen. Yeah. So somebody could just take a picture of that and then use that picture to unlock my phone, right? Okay. Yeah.

How dumb is that? How many people have pictures of themselves as a lock screen? Only fucking complete narcissist. You don't? Now I'm my dog, like a normal person. I know. It was me and the dog.

So it wasn't like a picture of me going like, hey, back at you buddy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ooh, I wish it could be that. I could rotate in selection of me giving myself boosters. The dog unlocks your phone. Oh, that'd like a rotating selection of me giving myself boosters. The dog unlocks your phone. Oh, that'd be a real trick.

Yeah, yeah. That'd be real. I don't know. I think you got a smart dog. So these these one uses my phone to order Amazon shit. These he these thieves are hitting up gay pride events. Really? Yeah, these girls had another one

and everybody got cleaned out. What do you mean? Some thieves stole all their phones. Not her phone this time, because she's got a locked up now, but everybody's phone is our big phone repository somewhere that they all, What do you mean?

That's called Mexico is the big phone repository. Like what are, what are all these gay people doing with their phones to where they could be stolen? They're shoving them right up there. That's how they're getting monkey pox. They're going at piss parties and shoving them right up there. That's how they're getting monkey pox. They're going at piss parties and shoving them up their ass and doing ass phone,

they call it. It's like we have operator, they have aspirator, you stick your phone in their ass and they call, you stick your phone up your boyfriend's ass. Asperate your phone. And then you call. I'll kill ya. And then you tell them the secret.

And then he sticks his phone up the next gay guy's ass and says the same message that he thinks that you said into his your phone and his ass, right? If a ring wouldn't everybody come? Yeah. They're just sitting around all day coming. All of a sudden there's like a huge surge in like purchasing certain ringtones or something and, you know,

and the gay community. The bass. I don't know. The bass, the bass, the bass, blaster, ringtone. Oh, oh, oh, like that Howard Stern clip, except it's a guy on the speaker. Yeah. Yeah. But that's how they're all getting monkey pox.

They shoved their phones. Cause of the phones and the pissing. Do you know about that? The piss party? No, see that. No, no, no. Do you know about monkey pox? I mean, it's a global epidemic.

I mean, I've seen, you know, what the fuck can I die? I've seen a couple of monkey pox. Couple of hundred cases in Florida. Sean, it's no more gay sex. No more. It's obviously. Josh over, both of us are swearing it off today.

Link is all the way to, uh, is there a link? Yeah. That's all the people who are getting it, 98%. There's 99% always. It's a huge gay, overwhelmingly gay. It's gayer than AIDS, they say. Wow.

This gay is shit. Jesus. Might as well be called gay monkey pox monkey Monkey pricks might as well be called yeah, I don't have anything better than that You know it's they're not they're not they're burying the lead up a guy's ass on monkey pox I don't want gay people to get it, but look you know if we can fuck women as much as you guys do Wouldn't stop me either. You know what I'm saying?

Oh, wow, man, I'm gonna really take out some repressed aggression on the, these ladies are down to fuck all the time. Oh, it's on. The piss party's on. What does piss have to do with it? I don't know, there was this guy talking about how he got monkey pox

and he was at like a multiple piss party orgy. He was at some piss orgy. I got you. Pisting all over each other. Maybe it was a fake, maybe it was fake news. Right. I don't know why someone would fake that though. That's an odd one. I know why someone wouldn't do that. But yeah, it's odd. Monkey po Voted on you, Ratty. Vito's talking about jacking up his cat this episode of biggest problem. Have you ever heard anyone do that? No. But a cute tip? No.

It says it's normal. No. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, welcome to dick. You wanna get in the get in the get in the get in the get in the show. That's the kind of just give me a lot of room. I'm burger deep in the heart of the family.

I'm gonna be hosting the three-month-old man. I'm gonna be as always. It's a world touring LA based community show. I'm gonna be a real big fan of the show. I'm gonna be a real big fan of the show. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH The energy has shifted. Where you gone? I'm fucking, I was caught in a hole of deep despair with my arm as fucked up as the way it was. Decrepitating. Right. Decrepitating decomposing before your eyes. Dehabilitating. Now you can do stuff.

What are you doing away? Rotting or atrophying away? Yeah. Oh God. I did a three pound curl yesterday. Ha! And it didn't pop. Another pop. That's great. I did a three pound curl yesterday Another pop that's great. Come on. Come on. I can see the little we the little dials and gauges in my arm Come on you son of a bitch that's gonna pop live right here. What I'm doing it

Come on I need more biofeedback than what I have oh go until it hurt go until it feels bad is not a good B-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-been-be Mmm, must not be, it must just not be possible to blow it out at this point. That's what I got a figure. Don't get that. Okay. Or else why would they, yeah, why would they turn you loose for three pound curls? Yeah, why would they turn them? We're starting to get three pounders. Huh, huh. Now take it easy.

Huh, sounds like a fucking rock tumbler in there. Ah, really? You can hear it. Oh, god, it sounds like bad. It sounds like 10 busted ball bearings in there. Yikes. Sounds bad. What's what I'm saying?

Sounds bad. 95% sexually transmitted, that's monkey pox. I actually have a stats for you. 98% are cases of men with multiple male sex partners. Wow. Destiny's said he's giving up men. He's swearing off men until this monkey box is out of control.

I had no idea. I had no idea. We had no way for him. The gays are gonna come after our women now. Oh God. We gotta come in with their hot pods and they're pretending to pay attention. Every time I think, and their jobs aren't too funny.

I think they're just funny enough. Yeah. Every time a think, and they're just funny enough, every time a women couldn't think of them, that's the gay sense of humor. It's just, it's not too funny. It bridges the gap. Just funny, and it's the missing link, like a Sasquatch. Just funny enough so that a woman could not

have thought of it, but not too funny. Yeah, okay. Right? Just within reach, like the holy grail. Maybe I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm probably gonna die of that. Right. Guys who like other guys don't have to be that funny.

Guys who like women have to be really fucking funny. Oh, wow. Yeah. So it's, there's this. That's true. There's the women don't have to be funny at all. Polios coming back. Oh, really? Oh, excellent. I can't wait to be funny at all. Polios coming back. Oh really?

Yeah. Excellent. I can't wait to get sure. That's great. I don't know. This guy, I don't give a shit about, oh man. Oh, fucking, I have solved the greatest mystery of my life. Really?

I had, have I, you remember me talking about my bed creaking like an old pirate ship, right? Did I ever tell you about that? Probably. Let's say you did. Oh, I was so happy about this bed that I got, like a bedroom set because up until then, I just slept on a mattress frame and the cheap one too. Not when I would go to sit and sleep, I would say,

yeah, a mattress frame, yes, the cheap one. Yeah. Don't give me the one that could fit any. I've seen the expensive one. It's got two bars in it. I don't need that. You got a little bit of sitting sleep. That's why I bought my bed. It was Larry.

I took a bus and Larry there. Yeah. I heard one shit out of it. Yeah, right. Yeah, I went to sit and sleep. There probably a rip off too. I was like saying where I went on the show anymore because somebody's like, somebody go right in, I'm an insider, it's sitting sleep. But actually, we fuck all the beds.

It's just a worst kind of. Yeah, yeah, there's always, yeah. Always somebody has to ruin, oh yeah, cause I always thought it was like an amazing company before. Yeah, I was really, yeah. Yeah. It's either that or go to a place that it looks like it has a scam in the name, like mattress firm

or something, mattress, I don't know, whatever. So your bed cre it has a scam in the name, like mattress, firm or something. I don't know, whatever. So your bedcreaks like a pirate ship? The creeps like that. So I got my bed and I'm like, you know what, I'm getting a full on bedroom set, like an adult. Let's find, let's go to Restoration Hardware.

Yeah, yeah, it's good stuff. Oh yeah, let's spend some, I'm spending like I'm on the showcase showdown, prices right. Oh yeah, baby, let me get this, oh Russian. Well, I'm only gonna have, I'm only gonna buy one of these. I'm gonna die on this one, right? I don't know, what am I gonna ever update my bedrooms

to buy anything new? I'm cheap as shit. You just buy another one. Never would I buy another one? You can buy new mattresses and stuff, I mean. Yeah, you know, nobody won't do that either though. Let's be honest. Okay.

So I go, I'm overdue for one fuck, yes. I get this fucking, I get this bedroom set set home sleep on at the first night all night What are you fucking kidding me? So it's it's creaking. It's like wood creaking wood creaking against wood. No, that sucks. Yeah This is like the whole of a fucking ship This sucks. Yeah, this is like the whole of a fucking ship. Like the whole of a fucking ship, almighty. Yeah.

So I'm like afraid to move now, because I don't wanna wake, you know. Yeah, it's loud. You know, who, I don't wanna, and now the dog's there, I don't wanna wake anybody up. So all night I'm just like letting blood puddle in my back, all night, because I don't wanna roll over and number one,

pull the sheet off the side of the bed Because the mattress is too thick or causing any kind of creaking Mm-hmm. It's like Had him come back. They took the bicep. This bed is fucking defective. Get it out of here. Mm-hmm Bring me a new one. Probably a new one. It's the same thing. You got to be fucking kidding me I went in there with a wrench. I went in there with a wrench and a bar about 20 feet long to make sure it was tight. But it was the wood together, right?

Is it wood on wood? Do you know this out of wood on wood, right? No, I know. So it doesn't really, I mean, you're, that's, the joints are all tight and everything. It's not like it's, I thought it was, because you could see a little bit through the,

some of the joints, okay, perfectly on them. Maybe this is a fucking problem. You pay a bunch of money and the stuff still fits like third world bullshit. You know what the guy said? Bullshit. Well, you know what, this thing. The guy comes out to look at it and goes,

well, this didn't used to happen before they started making it in China. Right. And I said, yeah. Yeah, it's everything. It's everything. All right. You can buy decent shit and one of the holes just won't line up on one of the, it's like, it's like, it's a line up.

Yeah, yeah, it is. And what are you gonna do about it? You can't do jack fucking shit. So they come out again and they're like, I don't know buddy, this is the best we could do. Okay. No. This is the Creek's all night. So I had the exterminator come out for another issue and I was moving things around. Fucking what was in your bed? No, I sit on one of the nightstands and it gives one of the same creeks. and I was moving things around. Fucking what was in your bed?

No, I sit on one of the nightstands and it gives one of those same creeks. Yeah. I was like, what the, wait a minute, what the fuck? Well, yeah. The nightstand creeks too. No way. Is it the fucking floor? It was the fucking floor.

Yeah. So I put this, I used a car jack to lift the bed and put this felt under, I saw the upstairs on the table. My felt? No, the car jack. But I wonder what this is doing here. By the way, it is the cleannest jack I have ever seen in my life.

It's very, very spotless. I was like, wow, look at the women have drove in that car. They'll never, they'll drive. Hey, hi, my car is out of gas. Come to the light. It was the floor. It was'll never. I don't know. I play, hi, my car is as out of gas. Come to the floor. It was the fucking, I put it on, I put that felt shit on all around the bottom.

Yeah. Oh my God. I said like a fucking baby, I woke up this morning. Ah, refreshed. Silence. Silence. Silence was deafening. Silence, I could jump around like a child.

Like a boy spinning around How happy I am about that to you two bedsets Yeah, it's it means to well fuck them whatever. Yeah. Yeah How did they not know that? I did not know that well the first thing I thought of it depends on your you know your floor Which you got my god shit floor dog shit. That's good. Did I hit the play on this already? Yeah, I first thing I thought of, is it depends on your, you know, your floor, what you got. Oh my God. Shit floor. Dog shit floor.

Well, that's good. Did I hit the play on this already? Yeah, I'm sure I did. Who cares? Oh, here's something. Here's something crazy, Sean. You know, I believe this. This is China.

China says, speaking of China, there's an ongoing banking crisis in China. China says, speaking of China, there's an ongoing banking crisis in China that will, with several major banks about to collapse and to stop the protests, China has labeled all bank customers as COVID infected, making it impossible for them to take public transit or travel even in their own cars. Isn't that? They initially restricted the movement of the depositors by turning the COVID test code on their smartphones red, which made it impossible for them to take public transportation or even drive their own cars. A public outcry from the Hina, Hina and government, who isn't that crazy that the government would use COVID in such a way to subjugate their citizens. Isn't that? Isn't that? I hope that you didn't grin.

I hope that no one who's not that known to have Pepsi, man. That's veto. Is it? Yeah. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I guess he, he likes Pepsi. Well, yeah, Pepsi, man. That's veto. Is it? Yeah. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I guess he, he likes Pepsi. Well, yeah, because he did that video where he was giving Pepsi to riders, like that Kylie Jenner or whatever. Yeah, I got it. Commercial.

Have you ever heard somebody jacking their cat off? No. Why would it, is, because veto says when they're in heat, they go nuts and you got to jack them off. That's when you get a new cat. I mean, that's what that fix to something. But there are some things that are worth paying someone else for.

Yeah. That would be one of them. Yeah. You're going to the vet say my cat's crazy. Kill it. Uh, gender activist pushed a bar and topologist from identifying human remains as male or female or so college, right? It's just why would you be?

What's the purpose of just identifying these remains? It all reads like an onion article. It so reads like an onion article, doesn't it? Yeah. So, okay, so I'm started watching this dumb show. They don't know how they would have identified So this is this should be an Abedin Cacello bit. Yeah, I am but I identify as a woman. Mm-hmm. Oh How do you know? Well, how do you know? Well because I've always felt like a woman. Oh, yeah Well, how do you know? Well because I've always felt like a woman. Well, what's a woman? Well, it's what I identify as

Just used to be a man. Yeah, right circular. Yeah, right. Well, how did you know you were a man? well what's a woman? Well, it's what I identify as. Well, you used to be a man, yeah, right. Circular. Yeah, right. Well, how did you know you were a man? Because that's why, well, you're a man, right? Well, yeah, well, how do you know you're a man? That's what I'm asking you, right? And it was on first, what's up?

Yeah. You could go, someone could write that and it could be good. Not just what I did. But you might have, you know, given the inspiration. Somebody, yeah, right. That's what I'm asking you. Next great comedic to you. Got a good duo.

God knows it's not you and me. Okay, well you were a man. That's right. Well, what made you a man? Well, that's what I was told. I was. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, you're a man. You tell me, well, how do you know I'm a, because I'm telling you. Yeah. I'm watching this stupid Netflix show with Elliot Page. Yeah. And she like transition halfway through the show

on Netflix. Really? Yeah. And she's putting on the background as a garbage. Yeah. So it's a stupid, just capes shit and just have it on. I'm doing stuff. Yeah.

And she transitioned halfway through the show. So then her character in the show transitions. Right. And it's like during the apocalypse, the regular, like the show is happening. So it's like all this apocalypse, but it's very important that she do it then. Yeah, she goes and cuts her hair.

What else can I do? Oh, by the way, I'm, I was Vanya. I'm Victor now. And they all react to it. And of course, they're all positive to it. But I didn't really get that. Why the character had to do it. Yeah, well you page, that's cool, whatever.

It's kind of like a page just likes to take more topless, picks with a shirt off, but with his shirt off, then Zach Efron, right? I don't care. But why the character? I didn't know that either. Elliott Page. Yeah.

Oh, that guy can't keep his shirt on. Really? He'll go to Target with his shirt off. Wow. He'll go out like when you go on a lake trip and you're like, maybe I think I can pull off, not having my shirt on, and we go to the grocery store.

Yeah. And you're like, I should put my shirt on when we go to the grocery store. Yeah. And you're like, when you're in like a resort type town or whatever and you just kind of go, yeah. Yeah. That's like, LA, LA page doesn't even ask. It doesn't even question it.

It just keeps the shirt off. Good for LA page. I didn't know the character in the show would have to do that. Well, they want to, you know, it's not surprising. I was surprised. I was like, oh, okay. You mean because of the story, because of the storyline?

Like that would not be an appropriate thing to do when like the world, is it like an apocalyptic thing or? Yeah, there, there's in the middle of the apocalypse. Right. Like survival might be a little, you know, a little more important than playing the hair and opening up to your friend's circle. Yeah, like she just learns that she has superpowers and it's also like, oh, I'm a guy now.

And no one even says like, maybe she's Samsung. What do you mean? I don't know. Oh, yeah. Oh, no, she cuts the hair and gets the hair. She cuts the hair. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, she cuts the hair and gets the hair.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Super power. That's the opposite. It was really funny, I guess. But then all the brothers, they act like normal. It's just really weird to see, because all the brothers in the show act like guys. They're already cruel to each other. So it's a family? Yeah. Okay.

Yeah. They're exceedingly cruel to each other and dismissive and always post like, you know, posturing and threatening each other. And then they don't do that with her. They don't do that with him. Yeah, I'm soft. Yeah. Like what I did. It's kind of odd. I guess it goes. Yeah. Oh, you know, I got explaining to everybody. It's, I don't know. I think that Avin can sell a routine. I think that has legs. Did you see that she'll be able to do the same theater that we did in Minnesota? Really? Yeah. He got his other show canceled by trans people, activists. Unbelievable.

Mm-hmm. If you were going to go, if you were gonna go back in time, if you're in the future, you're like, I'm gonna cause as much of transphobia as possible. Mm-hmm. What would you probably attack the most famous black comedian of that time period, probably?

That'd probably be a good idea, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Okay, let's see here. Here's a new fun, Here's a new fun initiative. You can call 988 in New York. If you're going to kill yourself, what to know about 9? Oh, I can't get in there.

Oh, and fucking. Okay, let me see here. 10, is it 10 foot? 10 dot, 10 foot ladder or 12 foot. It might be 12 foot. Yeah. What's the minimum height you need for possible death? Was that the, no, this is just a site though, as you see.

That's what's called. Oh, it's been disabled. All right, well, I guess I get no information about 988, suicide, hotline. Suit 988, is this, is this the actual site that was disabled? Yeah, the New York Times disabled it. I can't read about it. No, I mean, the site though.

No, no, no, the actual suicide number. The hell is 10 foot ladder? 12 foot ladders, the site you can use to get around paywalls. Oh, because you can't get any news. Oh, that's a good name. Yeah, but then I guess they disabled it for that. That sucks. Oh, this is not, this isn't new.

In 2020, Congress designated the new 988. Tyling code to be operated through the existing national suicide. Oh, I didn't know that. Wow. If I guess you could call that anywhere. That's cool. You just literally 988. That's it. Yeah. Call or talk to some, talk to some ladies, I guess. I can't see how that would be abused at all. How do you even staff that? Well, I don't know. I don't know. I wonder if you have to,

exciting crazy. If you have to fake it, like talk to a trouble, you have to talk to a bot first. Oh, to prove that you're, yeah, well, you know, they, you know, parse through and see what who best can help you. And you know, it's been a day and a half and, you know, you've killed yourself. You're a detective, are you? You were on the fence, but you killed yourself because you, you know that nobody actually gives a fuck.

Yeah. You came to that realization that nobody actually gives a fuck. They see, they wait until you stop calling back. Yeah. They have like a timer. They stop bringing, there's that Halloween, you know, the series is time. Yeah. Oh, we just missed them.

We did everything we could. Huh. Well, that's cool, I guess. And just talk to like random people, maybe. I don't know. Well, I've been, you know, here's a big news. I want to get your tick on this one. Study finds that the chemical imbalance,

this is great. Chemical imbalance and depression and serotonin deficiency, a belief held by 80% of the public, 80% of people think that chemical imbalance it causes depression. Yeah, the one you said term a lot, they who? Well, I mean, people, medicine companies, I've never heard a doctor use that term a lot. Yeah. They who? Well, I mean, people, medicine companies. I've never heard a doctor use that term.

They've heard people use it. Yeah, I hear people use it. Yeah. Chemical and stuff. Because it's the catch-all for what's, you know, going on. Yeah. Really, what the newer research I think is showing is that it goes back to what is making the neuro transmitters.

Oh, great. It's going further back. Like they're looking at things like the structure of those elements and stuff like that. Okay, so you saw the new thing that says, that says serotonin. Wait a minute, let me read it. Serotonin deficiency is not causing depression.

Well, who said that? The people that did this 17, something umbrella study. Yeah. You didn't see that? No, no, I haven't seen that. Oh, shit. You got to look at it.

SSR, alright. Yeah. Study 17. I mean, look, I have no doubt that things will evolve as far as like the understanding of, I mean, that's just what it does. I mean, this is a pretty big deal though. If it's saying that... Yeah, I mean, that's just what it does. I mean, this is a pretty big deal though.

If it's saying that, yeah, I mean, is analysis of the blood, are there any brain? Are there problems with the study that people are pointing out, or you know what I mean, that other, you know, the seroton hypothesis of depression.

I don't know. Well, I mean, I couldn't know. I mean, no, but you want to, you want to look and see what other, you know, center, or you know, what other bodies that study this kind of stuff that are on a similar level, like what are they? So here's what happens a lot.

Yeah, yeah. Damn it. I'm trying to find the good thing. Here's what they know. The reason why SSRI, the mechanism is not fully understood. What's mechanism? The mechanism that SSRI is how they work or why they work. What they do know is that the symptoms,

the proper one and the proper dosage, the odds are that the symptoms will be alleviated by having more serotonin, that whole neuro networks work better. That's what they're seeing on imaging. They don't know that it's because of the serotonin or where they're stimulating the neurons themselves. Or the what do you call it?

Did I neurons? For three decades, people have been delused with information suggesting that depression is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. Sure, that's the common one. That's the common saying. Yeah. So that's, uh, namely, imbalance of brain chemicals called serotonin. However, ladies, research shows that the evidence does not support it. So they went through and found your blood, your brain, all the serotonin of all these, all these studies for whatever decades and said, we just can't find any, we can't find any correlation.

Well, you can take this question in serotonin. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Keep going. Seems like a big deal. Sure, it's a big deal. But then they say their responses. Oh, yeah, we knew that. Oh, yeah, I know.

Well, I knew that. I don't think 80% of people knew that. I don't think $15 billion of drugs being spent every year knew that. Oh, no, no, and of course, of course that's going to be the pharmaceutical company's position. Like, is it fine? Well, they want to sell, well, sure, they would keep that going, but I've never seen, I've never seen, seems pretty fucking big. Yeah, we couldn't find a connection after all.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know, I'm not taking it. That's working, I guess. That's that study. Well, no, I mean, they, you know, I don't know. I'm not taking it. That's working, I guess. That's that study. Well, no, I mean, they, you know, there's millions and millions of people who they do feel differently. I feel differently. Yeah.

I mean, it's not, but it's not a fix. It's not a fix. It lets you have your better days more often. And then you get to guess what? Work on your problems because taking a pill doesn't teach a shit. So it's, I don't think most people are working on it. Well, that would be a better place to start. See, then they said, oh, we already gave up

on the chemical imbalance series. Like, yeah, but I don't think you let anyone, I don't think anyone was, got the memo of that, fellas. Well, no, because the kick and that, because most people, well, look, but the kick in that because most people will look, but the public isn't going, it's not like they're going to be keeping up with like the latest and greatest thing. They just parent what their older people said, who parent what their parents said, who do all that kind of stuff. So yeah, they're looking at, you know, they're

looking at the, they're looking at ketamine, they're looking at... That stuff, I can tell you. Magnetic resonance. Definitely doesn't work. Magnetic resonance. Kemi will fuck you up. Stimulation, stuff like that. There's like real micro stuff. They're looking at, and the pharmaceutical companies

are spending billions on some of this new research because they know that it may be better. And then what is that? This is a cloudy brain thing that they got here on Vice. That's pretty good. What is law, a new review, in the original TV ad, the English president's so lofts. There's blah, blah, blah.

So loft, I don't think is really prescribed anymore. Look at this shit, this is exactly what they're talking about. Come on, balance, they're receiving. That's all bullshit. It's the field, it's the balance they're receiving. That's all bullshit. It's the field of what a reuptake inhibitor does is keep those neurons from taking back what is out in that field. How they communicate with electrochemical impulses. I think that's what they're saying.

They couldn't find any kind of connection of that. Maybe not. Maybe not. We couldn't find a connection saying those of that. And well, maybe not. Maybe not, maybe not. And we couldn't find a connection saying low serotonin causes depression. Yeah, and it's couldn't find it. From the time that I started taking them, that has been, they say,

here's what we do know, but it's not, they don't go so far, the doctors anyway that I've talked to, don't go so far as to say that yes, it's definitely serotonin. There's a couple of hundred neurotransmitters too. You got dopamine, you've got norepinephrine, you've got other ones.

Yeah, it doesn't surprise me that that's going to change. Again, you have to change the name then. They can't put serotonin in the name. Yeah, well, yeah, and a lot of them work on more. They work on things like Nora Peneferin as well. Yeah. There's some other ones, but yes, selective serotonin. You're right.

You're right. Serotonin is, that's the one that everybody knows. Somebody has to come out and say, look, Tom Cruise was right. Well, not about everything, but as far as, but as far as, there's a little bit right. Well, I mean, as far as Saratone and they don't know, they don't know why, but we do know,

right there in the name, they, ah, but it's in the name. They do work for millions of people. It's not a placebo thing. Yeah. You gotta prove it. Oh, well, that's been proven over and over again. I mean, you got to prove why you just say it works. Well, you know, well, nothing, but they, if you read the literature, they readily admit

where it stops. Where it stops. It's like, they work. We don't know the entire mechanism of action. We don't know. Here's what we do know. Okay. Fucking shifty. Now, as far as the pharmaceutical companies, as far as the pharmaceutical companies, you better fucking believe that they're going to say, yeah, they're lying. Well, sure, they want to sell chemical and balacet. Here's the thing that looks like a cock and there's chemicals going on to the other thing. Well, it's all a fucking lie. And here's the other thing, they're emboldened to do it because they own the government. That's why.

Well, and because they're relatively safe, I'm not saying safe, but they're relatively safe. So they're not probably going to have huge lawsuits on a bunch, you know, for a bunch of different people from a bunch of different angles. They're not. They're not, you're right. They're not safe.

I mean, there's a rift being 500 pounds. There's a rift to any of them. So they feel pretty emboldened to say, yes, we're confident that it's this. Okay. Go ahead. I guess you're right. What I will say is anybody who's on a chemical imbalance anymore. You can't say it anymore. You can't fucking say it. That's it, you can't. Ah, ah, ah. You know, if you're calling something else, you're going to call it,

we don't know how the fuck it works, Bell. Look, if that's- Call it, I don't know. We don't fucking know. If that stands up to scrutiny, then yeah, you have to take a hard look at that and say that like, okay, now you've got to go further back. I know the research has been not the serotonin

but where it's made or the structures that make neurotransmitters are looking looked at more carefully now than just, oh, it's this ingredient. It's like, no, where does the ingredient come from? How is it made? Why? Yeah.

They find that some of those things look different on people, you know, with like a family history of depression. The structures don't look normal. That's beyond what I understand about it. It's a big win for Tom Cruise. That's all I'm saying. He jumped on a couch. He's CNN's opinion itself indulgent to insist on silly, on chilly temperatures in the middle

of the summer. Right. Fuck you CNN. I don't care if that is CNN opinion. I want the air on. What's the difference? It still says CNN. I want this.

This is progress in America. Yeah. It's not, but at least say opinion. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. At least they're saying opinion. Progress is sweating your tits off. No. And cutting and chopping your fucking tits off.

Oh, God. Oh, we're making some great progress here. Our cats have pronouns, but if you guys are, if you're expecting to live in a comfortable temperature, no, no, my aunt's conditioner is, that's done. You get a blanket. I'm not fucking sweating in here. That rages.

I don't care. No, you're up, every time there's a a huge crazy heat wave, they fucking die. They should have fucking AC and you're up in it. Have you been to, they deserve it. I've been to Paris in August. Yeah, I've been in Paris in August. No AC in the fucking hotels. That's, that's insane.

Mm-hmm. They have all these stupid little ones like I have on my house. They don't even have that. They have a lot of them. That's true. Open two windows. Get across breeze. Fuck you.

Let's see here. It feels like a jet engine. Did you see that kid waste that guy at the mall? He shot him from like 40 yards away. No, no, no. 22 year old. Oh my God. A guy, a math shooter.

Of course we're not hearing about this anymore. Hear about George Floyd. Hear about all these assholes for so long, but a 22 year old kid pulls out a gun. Constitutional carry goes into effect in Indiana. Kid starts carrying a gun, or maybe he was came before, I don't know, whatever, it's legal.

The kid, math shooter, 22 year old. Math shooter pulls out a gun and mall kid goes, bam and gets him. Get somebody. Wow, seconds, seconds. Wow, amazing. Pretty good. I mean, that's right place, right time.

Gone, right. I can know his name. I know all these other assholes names. I don't even know his name. I know Eddie at Cowritten House name, don't know his name. By the way, here's Cowritten House right now. Finally got him. Look at this, don't know his name. By the way, here's Cowritten House right now. Finally got him.

Look at this, look at this poor bastard. Huh? This is him and his bitch girlfriend. What's her deal? Well, look at her eyes. Well, I mean, yeah, she looks like every- She's like every- Yeah.

Look at the insanity. A complete and total self centered horrible human being Like like we're like we're making like you know like America is making people Or like people are making America. I don't know look at her Yeah, talk takes down your video for minor safety But you're both over 18 and it was an innocent video just like your boyfriend is Scott this is Kyle Rittenhouse, this is a new girlfriend. She's all right.

She's all right, he's all right, he's got him. They got him. What do they get? What do you mean, what do they get? Like they took a TikTok. The system got, TikTok took him down. No, the system of women and. Oh no.

Oh, the gravity. So you don't care about the TikTok, man, okay. I don't care about that. I mean, this is, look at this. Yeah. I'd rather have been killed in the street by that pedophile. Jesus Christ. Okay. You got a very, very strong opinion on this.

Look at her, look at her contours. Mm-hmm. The way she sent her makeup. Don't you think that's a, that's the photo's been fucked with at all. I mean, is there anything that's with a woman that's unfiltered? Is it a bad filter? It is. Yeah, I mean, Bob Ross makeup filter. I mean, alliltered. It's a bad filter. That is. Yeah, I mean,

Bob Ross makeup filter. I mean, all happy accidents. It's horrible. She could, you know, you don't know, I mean, she could look like, I don't know, she could look like Joe Pesci. She looks probably hideous.

Oh no, you know. This poor, look at this poor bastard. He's like a little child. He does, he does look young, doesn't he? I'm more afraid a young looking guy. I'm more afraid of him laying back with this. The heartbeat laying on him, then I ever was watching him defend that card dealership.

You can know, right, right, right. Oh, just horrible. In his prime, cut down. He would be better off in jail if he'd gone to jail for life. Stay, keep him away from away from this lady. Yeah. Come out ahead in the long run. I could have done 50 years.

Come out ahead. Is that what you're saying? Yeah. Who'd have been better than where he is? Right. Work on, become a lawyer. Work on people's cases. Have a stop.

So we get a documentary. Have a stop. Talk about how you've learned. Meet an old black man who teaches him the ways of the world. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. When he destroyed that gun, he sealed his fate. Oh, he destroyed the gun. He'd basically destroyed his life.

And now he's stuck dealing with this. Look at this woman. Could you imagine if I showed up one day with this demented, I don't know, man. Devious side posting pictures of him on social media for, I don't know, I can't, it's difficult to look at. It's difficult for me to look at. Okay, let's see here. Oh, a woman of the year. I don't know if we talked about that last week. A woman of the year, Leah Thompson, that's good. Good for NCA championship swimmer,

Leah Thomas has been nominated by the one who won by like 48 seconds or some shit. Yeah. I nominated for one of the most prestigious awards and Aljai athletic sense, yeah, a woman of the year. Wow. It's well, I mean, didn't didn't ESPN give fucking like, what's his face? Like, uh, are they're ash? Who is? No, Caitlin Jenner. Like, yeah, that's funny, though, because that, you know, I just, uh, because that's like Bruce Jenner deserves to win that, right? That's like Bruce Jenner winning it. Who is it? Yeah, Olympic championship

at late one of the year. Yeah, one of the de-Cathalon. Yeah, I mean, he was on a Weasbach. That's like Bruce coming. Yeah, fuck you bitches. I suck my, I suck my, whatever I got. Right, right. But this, uh, Ladyman, lady hasn't, doesn't have his same accomplice. No, no. Um, yeah, I don't know. Oh, co-winner. Oh, okay. Co-winner. Oh, they named a co-winner.

Who was the other one? Who's the other one? It's the only way they could, it's another trans woman. No, shut the fuck up. Eternity Thomas. Okay, okay, okay. Barely, they almost got it by.

They're just named Eric Cohen. God damn, fucking. There you go. I watched that, you know, in fast forward basically, but just like, just watch her pulling away, just like, oh, now she's like, you know, a pool length ahead. Now it's like two pool lengths ahead.

It's retarded. Now she's waiting like sitting there at the end, you know, just kind of cooling down while the others have another lap and a half to go. And then she's getting out. She's towling off. And then here's, here's some conspiracy theories by ideology. Just published a new paper, blah, blah, blah, are conservatives and Republicans more likely to believe in conspiracy theories? Okay.

Okay, who is this guy? Let's see what, no, no. Some dude, researcher, let's see. Let's see what he says. He never cared, do ya? Nah, cause just like a survey, it's probably all bullshit. Political science, University of Miami,

co-author of American conspiracy theories, 2014, editor of conspiracy theories, and people who believe them. Okay. Okay. So let's like a survey. Let's figure, let's say he wants to know. Yeah. Seems like a guy who would want to know. Yeah, okay. Here's, I don't know what, I don't know what it means symbolic ideology and partisanship. Those are two different things, but they seem to be highly correlated. Okay. So, okay, wait, don't look at the graph. I want to ask you. Okay, I'm not really looking.

I'm kind of just, okay, who do you think believes in holocaust denial more? Holocaust denial? Yeah, that's a conspiracy to some two people. Shocking I know. I don't know. I'll say Holocaust denial. I don't know. I'll say the right.

But it might not be because it might be a tiny, a tiny fraction of the right who's loud. It's right smack in the middle. It is the most middleist of conspiracy theories that they got. Look, I'll be damned. Where is it? Holocaust now, right here.

No, yeah, no, these are people right now. Right there, look at that. Right in the middle. No, these are all of these are conspiracy theories. So it's who believes in what conspiracy theory? Yeah. Holocaust denial and danger of GMOs. Oh, right.

That's amazing. That's amazing. Ah, ah, ah. Oh, my. No, I would think that right in the water, I would think that GMOs would be way on the left. I would think that GMOs would be way on the left. Yeah, me too.

Okay, wait, don't look at it again. Okay. What do you think? Yeah, those are obvious. Well, how many people? Probably like a thousand. Probably not that many. Yeah.

COVID, COVID threat, exaggerated, that is all Republican. Sure, sure, sure. Do you think it was exaggerated? Like exaggerated. There was people saying, you're being a million deaths. Well, there have been. Oh, a million, like millions?

Not millions yet. I thought in the beginning, they were like, oh, millions of people are going to die. Like in the country that you live in. In the country. Well, there was the one. There was the one guy who was from England who Estimated that it was like two million or something like that total in the country. No, no in the country But what he did just as a slight def he's known for fucking that. He fucked up SARS-Bad. He's an English guy, but here were the parameters of that particular study.

It was assumed that 80, that was if Americans did zero. Went about their lives just as if COVID did not exist. No precautions, no nothing, and 80% of the population got it. That's where it's never, which was never, which was never, that was never a reasonable premises anyway, because if you know that like, oh, grandma's got the flu, you probably don't go over to grandma's house. Yeah. So even with the flu, you're going to do different.

And you're going to do different. You're going to do different things. So that was like an academic exercise at best. It had no bearing in. I know about that one. So that was like an academic exercise at best. It had no bearing in over with that one. So must have got play. That was one that, so you don't think it was exaggerated? No, I think, no, I think, according to the media, just how much we were inundated with it?

Yeah. Sure, compared to the amount of stories out there, yeah, would have to say that it's exaggerated. So that's a conservative conspiracy theory. Yeah, I mean, no, there is global warming how because Soros controls the world. Right. I think Soros controls the world. He appointed like D.A.s in every major, every big city. Soros funds. He funds, well, I mean, super bags. Yeah. Well, the conspiracy about the coat brother. Like, you know, well, I mean, super backs. Yeah, well, the conspiracy about the co-prother. Like, you know what I mean?

Like, they're doing the same shit. I got a long, long as you're consistent. Yeah. Sure. I mean, no, we know that this country's been bought and paid for decades ago. Uh, Dems infected Trump with COVID. That, that's dumb. Conspiracy to kill the police.

Mm-hmm. I don't wish. Well, that's dumb. Conspiracy to kill the police. I wish. Well, conspiracy among criminals. Epstein murder. That's a, I'm completely on fucking board with that. You're on board with that. Completely was, I think it's a conspiracy to think. Cover it up.

Yeah. Like, it seems obvious that did kill him. That's insane. How, I mean, how incompetent could you possibly be with like, I don't know, the highest profile person in like the federal prison system? Yeah. Was he in federal under, I would assume he's under federal care right there. He was.

He was. Christ. Spread COVID on purpose. Bill Gates caused COVID. Yeah. Sure. COVID anti-vax, elite pedophowering. Yeah.

Of course. Yeah. That's, that's true. What are you talking about? Deep state, also true. What do you mean conspiracy? Well, I mean, deep state isn't what? Like the FBI and the CIA have secret programs that are meant to undermine the leadership of the government.

Like why is prism exist then? Why is prism? Prism. With Edward Snowden didn't blow the whistle, we wouldn't know about any of that shit. Yeah. How was that a fucking conspiracy? Well, I mean, I don't know.

It depends if the Rothschilds are right in the middle. Vaccine tracking, yeah, Sandy Hook faked. Oh, not that many believe in conservatives. How about that? Yeah, I mean, you think he was so, well, that's why you wanna know like, where did he gather the data? Yeah.

You know, I mean, but it's interesting. It's interesting regardless. People have such a hard on about Sandy Hook. Have you ever, have you seen how upset people are about? Well, look, it's Alex Jones and Sandy Hook. It's tasteless. Like, I mean, it's just like, I would never fucking do that.

Like, it's just something. To me, somethings, you just don't fucking joke about. Like, I find that reprehensible. But he could also say shit, I guess, and it's like, I mean, I guess, I guess people are, I guess he's gonna get in trouble for it. I can't believe how upset they are. I can believe how upset they are

if you're the fucking parents or somebody knows them or. No, not to say they're parents. They're just like people online. Yeah, well, that's why I don't upset they are. I can believe how upset they are if you're the fucking parents or somebody who knows them or parents, they're just like people online. Yeah, well, that's why I don't spend any fucking time online and groups like that. If you go online and say like, it was funny when you and Alex shown so the best, you'll have a hundred people going, it wasn't for you. And then a bunch of people going like, stop, stop engaging him. False flags, blah, blah, blah, let's see the liberal ones. Uh, GOP steals elections.

They do, that's not a, I mean, they would if they could. Trump is a Russian asset. Oh, that's retarded. Trump faked COVID. Okay. Nobody, Yeah. All right. Uh, Iran hostage conspiracy.

There's a coach back in the Ukraine or whatever. Sure. Yeah. How do they have these people? So there's the there's the opposite. Yeah.

Oh, Jason. That's great. Oh, Jason Simpson is a is a conspiracy. The more liberals believe it. Oh, I see. Go up to the top. The moon landing. Oh, Jay Simpson is a conspiracy. The more liberals believe it. Oh, I see. And go for the top of the moon landing. Oh, okay. Yeah, I would have guessed that was on that slide.

Because it's kind of traditionally speaking unpatriotic. Oh, yeah. You know, the fucking, the US. Republicans are like, yeah, fucking A, we put a fucking man on the moon. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I see what you're saying. Yeah, and it's, yeah, MLK assassination. Mm-hmm.

Well, a little bit, they tried. FDR Pearl Harbor, I assume that means he knew about Pearl Harbor. That's what I've always heard. Was that's the, seems to reason. Yeah, not that he did it, that he knew it was coming. And he did it himself, right. Flowing his handicap.

And he kept equipped a stolen Japanese zero and with Scotch tape on his eyes. Oh, okay. Good shit. Good shit. And where was that last one? Banks manipulate the economy. 9-11 Truth or I always thought

that 9-11 stuff was more on the left. Now remember, I'll speak for myself. I may be a little skewed because I live in Southern California. Oh, you thought it was on the left. Well, it's barely on the right. Yeah, barely, but it is. I always thought every 9-11

conspiracy theory that I heard was from a definite liberal. Somebody definitely on the left. Oh, that's interesting. But again, I live in Southern California. Banks manipulate the economy. I don't understand how that is even remotely a conspiracy theory. They are, I mean, on TV every day control stuff. The lending. So it's how they are going to control day controlling about lending. So they are gonna control inflate, that inflation is not a big deal. Transituary, actually, it's good for you. And that's like, we need,

we're not gonna have how many years it's gonna be. And we need a recession to control inflation. Every fucking day. Yeah, well, yeah. Okay, good job, guys. Good study. Let's see what else I got here. Do do do do do do did all those.

Oh, did you see AOC pretending to be arrested? Yeah, I saw what it was she pretending to be arrested. I mean, they arrested some people, right? I mean, wow, she didn't have handcuffs on. I think she's just, did they put zip ties on her? I think she's just trying to have any, trying to stay relevant. Look, she's trying to get back into, look, look, look. She doesn't have anything on her.

She has nothing, well, okay. Look, would you, would you think this person is walking like they have handcuffs on? Well, I mean, not, I can't really see. Okay, watch the whole thing. I'm getting escorted out. This is, here's her account saying, I mean, not, I can't really see. Okay, watch the whole thing. Getting escorted out. This is, uh, here's her account saying she was arrested. Does she just maybe have her hands together in the back?

Is it like, I would, I would, I mean, I would love it if they could show that she does not have anything on. I would walking with her hands. I mean, I would love it if they could show that she does not have anything on. She left her hand up. Did she? Yeah, you didn't see that. Yeah, look, look, look, look, watch, watch.

There's her hand up. Wait, what? That's her hand up. That is her. Keep going, keep going. Oh, good, I can see now. I tried to. Yeah, here.

Oh my god, it's yeah. What do we do? She left her hand up. What's it's yeah. What do we do? She let's her hand up. What's it? Yeah, that can fake handcuffs. My God, dude. That's fucking... This is dude, this is what?

So bad. This is the same as the girl laying with Kyle Rittenhouse. Just a completely self-centered look at me. Lunatic. Dying cannot be out of the spotlight. We're going to fucking hell. I think we're there, but I can always get worse. Yeah, just walking with their hands.

As if the cops are escorting her off. Wouldn't they have a hand on it? Goddamn, man. He's like this. He's like man. He's like a people. Somebody who wants you to think that she's like a boonist and like they're pondering, some kind of fucking martyr. Fuse should say, what a bitch. And okay.

Or, and that was from whose account? Her's account. Oh, cause she got arrested. I could see somebody putting another account going like, here's her faking, she got arrested, where later she's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, wait, but you can see where it's like, oh, later they, they do show her in handcuffs, but instead they show that and say she was arrested and you go, no, she wasn't. Uh, here's Maddox's new fit. New fit.

Maddox, here's a pose from Maddox. He looks like he's the last way. Don't give him that. He does. Unless that's, of course, a photo. I feel dirty. Yeah, why wouldn't it be? I like it.

Cowboy fit, yee-har, yee-na. He's got two pairs of sunglasses. Mm-hmm. I don't know if you saw that. I mean, if that's really him, he's got two pairs of sunglasses. You know, I don't know if you saw that. I mean, if that's really him, he's in a lot better shape than he was. It's really him. I mean, if it's not like an ad, no, looking bad for gummy bears.

Uh, I don't know how you afford this. Look at that. Well, he's just trying it on. I left the tags hanging down, just getting on. Let the tags hang in down. Just getting on. Be great, wouldn't it? Pants real tight. What's this?

I don't know, this bracelet. That's, he's got like those wooden beads like a prayer beads. I don't know. Some people wear that shit. I don't know. So, probably he's not wearing one of the, one of the wrist, like the wide leather bands, like the straps on the wrist, you know what I mean? Like that seems like a...

He's surprised about that too. Well, yeah. It's pretty good. I say yee ha. Good for him. Okay, pretending to be arrested, drag queens, it's pride shit all over the class. Oh, damn.

Teenager commits suicide. Oh, yeah, here was, this was a pretty funny one that I saw. Don't do some comments. Bo. So here's the police. Here's the police crying about how no one will help them. The individual has been, this individual, here's the cop individual has been, this individual has been released. If New Yorkers want to know why the chaos in the transit system

is not improving, this is why the criminals underground. No, they can get in a brawl, choke a cop and be out in hours. Look at this brawl, right? The kid wailing on this cop. Here comes a lady cop who exists for no reason, trying to like, you know, how chicks punch, like leaning back their entire upper body and batting at it like a cat playing with the light.

So what, she's, so this kid's pants falling off, wrestling around with this cop. So what's the other cop dealing with the other chick? Yeah. What the fuck? Here comes, I don't know what that guy's like, a security guard or something. I don't know why this guy is not a real cop.

He's filming his own phone. The shot. Free epic brawl over $3, right? Three bucks. What else is it? How much is a metro fare? Okay, he's got him. He's got him some dude. Yeah, okay. Yeah, pretty good. Yeah. Yeah, wow, that sucks for you guys, right?

Really, uh, really, uh, you know, I wish someone would I wish someone was there to help you guys out more NYPD. Oh, maybe it's uh, maybe the guy who is going around and confiscating glow in the dark orange water guns in New York, like this orbeez toy could be the guy. I got it. I figured it all out. You could take, here's another one, today in the Bronx, 18 year old Raymond Chow's Lane was playing with a toy water guns, spraying people with water when NYPD shot and killed him. So maybe, I think I've identified the problem. It is that when you're not on the subway, arresting people over their $3 metro fares for no

reason. You're out walking around shooting kids for toy, obvious toy. So really what it looks like. This is what it is. An orbeez toy. This is kind of what it might look like. Is that the, no, that's the Orbeez toy. That's a weird statement.

You had an orbit for context. This is kind of what it might look like. I know those, that Orbeez line. They know it's like water pellet shooting. What a weird, what a weird sentency that guy wrote. Here's there in YPD News, bead blaster. She's no water beads propelled by a spring loaded air pump, making them an air rifle.

Air rifles are a violation in New York City of the United Unlawful to possess. Violators found a possession of these will be issued to criminal summons and the weapon. So it was a justified shooting, huh? The weapon, the weapon. The weapon. Yeah, that's justified shooting, huh? The weapon, the weapon. Yeah, that's crazy.

That's fucking crazy. Cry, cry us a river. Yeah, this is how you, this is how, yeah. Can you believe our cops are getting beat up in the subway? I can. I can. I can. I remember you guys smashing up all those ghost scooters.

Oh, whatever. I remember you guys smashing up all those ghost scooters. Oh, whatever. And okay, there's a bunch of more trans shit too much. Children as young as two recognize their trans identity. Okay. I think that's adults putting, you know, little projection, right? For what's your identity?

Well, identify as a woman. Well, what's a woman? Well, that's what I identify as a woman. Exactly. I know you are. I'm talking right here. To find it. Oh, I can't define it.

Why? Well, because anyone could identify as a woman. What are they identifying as then? Yeah, what? I don't, you know, like an, like an an like an, there's a million, I think is still a million jokes here, but yeah.

And I'll read some comments. Some advice, research suggests that children as young as two recognize their trans identity. Okay. Yeah. Friends identity. Hahaha. Recognize their trans identity. Okay. Yeah. Trans identity. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.

Uh, research suggests that children and young who recognize their trans identity. Yet many nurseries and schools teach a binary understanding of pre-assigned gender. LGBTQ inclusive and affirming education is crucial for the well-being of all young people. Hmm. My four-year-old is gender non-conforming. I wonder how that happened.

But her nursery, how do you know it's her? What if it's Zer? Gender non-respect. So what does gender non-conforming mean? It's a four-year-old girl who likes all boy stuff. Is that what nonconforming means? Yeah, like a feminine, like what we use to call it and masculine and like Tom boys are, are totally fucked. They're just completely fucked.

What do you mean because they get labeled as something else, something more, you know, hybrid, you know, more, yeah, invasive. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's just no chance of them making it out. Actually, it's more, it's almost more isolating to use terms like that. Yeah, to them because she's gender nonconforming. Like, no, she has like, she like sports and fucking cars and shit, you know? My husband and I took to asking whether she felt

like a boy or a girl or neither. Four. How do you, what is that, you know, 34-year-olds can't fucking answer the question. They just go, well, I've always kind of been, right, was raised like a boy and I, I guess I feel like a boy. I mean, I like girls and I like sports. Yeah, I guess I'm, you know, but I mean, it's like you think about it for a second.

What the fuck is a four year old know about anything except trying not to shit their pants? Yeah, to let her know we were listening and keeping tabs on any progression either way. It just sounds like you were talking, actually. I was bathing her one time when the question came up and she said, I'm a boy. It's like the Hans, the smart horse, right?

Clever haunts, yeah, the ones, yeah. Right. I'm a boy. Oh my God. I've got it. Oh, cement, I'm Facebook. She went quiet for a moment, looking down at the bubbles, deep in thought. Nope. That was not what's happening. And then she looked up with a confident smile.

She confirmed, I'm a boy today. Okay. Are you fucking kidding me? Okay. Confident smile and a four year old. And then tomorrow, tomorrow should be a girl, because she's playing, you know what I mean? Like, playing around most likely.

I'm Marvel and how self assured she is already. What the fuck is this in? This is worse than Nazi propaganda. This is how you fuck, this you have to fuck it up. You're putting a bunch of like heavy shit. Don't make things serious before they need to get serious. They know. It's a kid just fucking around.

For as long as I can remember, I've struggled to assert myself with others, even my own family. This is a kid saying that. No, this is the author. And here's the fucking problem. You just got to it. God. I marveled how selfish I wish I was that self assured when I was her age. No wonder they want to take

out of her the parents. I'm making her the authority. Jesus, I'm fucking Christ. I'm beyond relieved. She feels comfortable. There's a word for that. What would be beyond? I don't know. She feels comfortable being herself around me and keeps growing all the more confident and adventurous for it. That sounds a little low. But the obstacles to her sense of self have started looming ever since she started nursery in September 2021. After she'd been attending for a few weeks, she said to me again, she was a boy,

but she looked troubled and added that her teacher told her she's a girl, that she's always a girl. Oh, so that's okay. So now we have a, now we've got a big problem. We should just change, boy girl, it should just be idiot. I'm a girl. You're an idiot. Wait a minute. Oh, boy. Actually, you're an idiot. So the parent is a trans man. Oh, well, I mean, I'm assuming this is the same article. I suspect her teacher is not for my daughter or for anyone in the trans community. As a trans man, I know this firsthand.

You cracked it. You cracked the case. What are the odds? What are the odds that a trans parent would have a trans kid? Trans people are not higher than a person who identifies as a gender. .1% right?

What's that? How many trans people are pointing out? I don't know. I'm just saying that a transparent, I'll bet you, I'll bet you it's a lot higher percentage that they have a trans kid. And I think I know why. Oh, how about that? And I bullying policies aren't cutting

it, not for my daughter or for anyone in the trans community. As a trans man, I know this person. I mean, there you go. It makes me want to bash my head into a fucking wall. Now you know, I know they're what they're going through. I don't think of queer phobic language. Yeah. Persist in 54% of secondary school alone. You can fuck your kids up in so many ways. And to me, this is just as bad as what would happen on like the other side. It's just, it's really what would happen on the other side. Well, I mean, teaching them about hell.

Well, yeah, yeah, sure. Something like that. something like that. Something like that, or yes, yes. Everything that goes along with it. Yeah. Students are queer, phobic, something of secondary school. Oh, man, one day, one day they're gonna let the, one day they're gonna pull the stops out of the organ,

of the slur organ. And it's gonna be a pull- out the stops, pull the stops out. It will be a chorus, hate rising out of the most vicious, Hammond B3, hate, licks you've ever heard. And once it'll be one note, all the slurs it wants, yeah, it'll be one beautiful note, right. It'll evaporate people. Everyone will shit their pants and fall over.

We're all through them. Yeah. Like a wave of hatred. Like a fucking like a nuclear bomb. Here it comes. Not today. We're comes the last wave. One day, secondary school is alone and believing these slurs aren't a problem begins in primary school. What what's that the slurs? Are they? Do they mention all this to them? No, I know there are slurs, but like I'm trying to say with this article. Did the teacher use a slur or is a slur?

Okay. Uh, well, that's too bad that that happened to you. Can we read some comments from some less fucked up people like Las Say says climate protest at the tour to France Denmark denied in a farmland. How did I can John? You talked about a climate protest that this year's tour de France stage 10 where the race was stopped because protesters glued themselves to the road. They tried to do this in Denmark a week earlier in the first ever tour de France here. The protesters just failed to plan for the stage.

With a tour de France in Denmark? I guess, I didn't know that was a franchise. I mean, stupid me, I always just thought it was in France, is that? Yeah, maybe this is a joke. I always just thought it was in France, is that? Yeah, maybe this was a joke. Men's Tour de France winner, don't know, Denmark is the Tour de France in Denmark, okay.

Derald Thomas, the champion completed the podium in this year's three week. The Tour de France is a prestigious, the takes place annually in France. And sometimes there's the surrounding country. Why don't you fuck? I thought I was always the same route. Right, like you think a marathon would be or something.

The path that's always different though. I guess there's longs this 26.2 miles, right? Yeah, okay. So they do it in Denmark sometimes. I guess, I guess so. Maybe there's, did you think on the time of year, there's stuff going on where they can't,

you know, maybe there's a, I don't know, those are fucking floods or, you know, some shit got. There's a high rise on your last route. I don't know too many, too many yellow vests. The protesters just failed the plan for the Danish fans that were standing behind them. As soon as they have taken up a comfortable resting spot in the road, Danish fans appeared and dragged them away. This was repeated several times by the protesters and resulted in the same thing. Danish fans dragging helpless thin arms and protesters off the road. So every time they went out there and did their thing, the Danes would just come in and drag them away.

Yeah, they just dragged them away. Well, good. Denmark is not a very large country, but when someone fucks with our national pride, we put away all our socialism and take action. This was not shown in the international media, so I have an article from the Danish media. No, thank you. Keep up the good work and go fuck yourself. Doctors should ask their patients about gun ownership.

Hey, Dickenshawne. I'm a med student, so I subscribe to a weekly newsletter on one of the medical journals that is supposedly intended to be read by students. Here's an article that was featured in this week's recap. Let's see if I can load it up here. Buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh. It says, is patient gun ownership, quote, none of our business?

Yes, the answer is yes. Or I mean, they should all own guns. He's too long to read. It's this hair dyed slur of a man arguing that asking your patient, if they have any guns in the house, is the same as asking about drugs, alcohol, and smoking, because the risk of suicide and homicide is three to four times larger, and households with guns. However, his main point is, you guessed it,

because guns are a danger to children. Oh my God! Well, I want to ask the child's father, if there were any firearms in the house and his response was that's none of your business. Let me guess what happens to the kid in this story in this Atlantic though. Okay, sure. He became Barack Obama, the president of the, he didn't care.

He didn't care what I asked about drugs, smoke, alcohol, pets, mold. Mm-hmm. I would care about mold. Well, I mean, there is some mold. There is some of the black molds, I guess, are toxic. Guns are in their own category with many people not even wanting us to call gun violence a public health concern. Well, it's not.

According to the gun violence archive, 2021, the United States 44,000 deaths related to firearms, which includes everything having to do with the, yeah, we know that different countries count, you know, stats like differently. Yeah, and it also includes like cities, which shouldn't be included really. What do you mean? Like, you can't really include Chicago and Detroit because they're so overwhelming. Like, there's a lot of gun deaths there. Yeah. Like, you know, it's, yeah, I mean cities, five, five cities in America have a very big gun problem.

Sure. The rest of America does it. We have to care. And then he's got an infographic amazing. If you want, I'll send you some prime fat watch material. Oh, yes. From a med student, please. How we should ask asking on behalf of the show, please. How we should ask our patients for permission to talk about their weight if they, that's, you know, I've heard that before. Do you have permission to talk about your big fat ass? Look, you should, you know what?

You'll lose some fucking patients and they'll drop down. I mean, I think that's somebody like a doctor, if you're come, if they have to give you their best, their most educated medical opinion as of that date, whether fucking you wanna hear it or not, you can choose to say fuck you. But it's like, yeah, you are at risk for a bunch of shit because you're a fucking 130 pounds overweight.

And look at you. I'm sorry if that fucking hurts your feelings, but I'm trying, my job is to keep you, you're coming to me, you know, I guess, because you want to, yeah. I don't know, is this your punishment? Did somebody make you come here and have tests in all that kind of shit?

What you actually want to know? They got to just turn, doctors have to have like a policy of kind of, well, we got this guy that runs around, doctors offices just running in and pretending to be a doctor and saying that you're too fat and no one can run up. Stop them, right? And then I could go put on a little outfit like, hey, how you doing? I'm your doctor. Do you realize how fat you are?

That could be a big, I mean, your bedside man or a hard tag. Interesting. Yeah. And you stink. Yeah. Hard to wash back there. You know, that you'll stink less if you lose weight. That's the, that's the major health concern. And then the doctor, the doctor, the other people, who are you? Whoa, I got out of here. And then they never catch me. Oh, that's the, they don't follow up. I got too much to do today. Remember the show, doogie house, remember his little buddy, Vinnie? Yeah. In one episode, I remember Vinnie, there was like a really famous, like, hot singer who was in for something wrong with her throat. So he pretended he was doogie house. Yeah, and then he like, he wanted to listen to her heart and he put

it on the wrong side. Yeah. You know, and he says, like, oh, well, it's important that you sneak up on it. She's like, isn't that the wrong side? It's very important that you sneak up on it. Coming with Ray's blood pressure and take the door frame with them when they enter the office. I believe you talked about that already.

Keep it a good show and smooch his for Sean. Oh, thanks. Brinkhorne says, did you see that women in Germany who turned down Joe? I believe you talked about that already. Keep it a good show and smooch is for Sean. Oh, thanks. Brand core. Brand core says that you see that women in Germany who turn down jobs as sex workers are getting their benefits decreased since prostitution is no longer considered immoral profession. Oh. Oh gosh, that's too bad.

Germany is softening their stance on prostitution. But that also means it's not legal though, is it? I don't know, maybe it means. Let's see. Let's see what this article says. So if they're not putting out, if the whores aren't putting out, then they get their benefits docked, because they're like refusing to work. So which is it ladies?

Germany forcing unemployed women The legalized prostitution So it's Berlin brothels So right so if you're not looking for work you get your benefits right. So if you're not looking for work, you get your benefits, Doc, right? If you're not looking for work. If you're not looking for work, you're supposed to lie on the American ones.

Like did you look for work? Did you look for work? I did. Okay, who? Listum. Right. So a woman comes into the unemployment office and they have you looked for work?

Well, yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, here's a whorehouse right down the street. Yeah, they have openings. Why don't you go there? This is weird. Because all weird. Germany forcing unemployed women into legalized prostitution. Oh, this is 2005, buddy. This is old. You know, this was 2013. What the fuck? Who sent this? I don't know. If it Jesus Christ come on. Right decade. Right fucking decade, dude.

A lot says Newks in New York City. New York put together a PSA for a nuclear attack. You want to see it? Let's see if it's in the right decade. Yeah, sure. Then I have some white. It's like a black and white grainy film of kids getting under their desks and covering their head. It should be. It's there. Don't ask me how.

Okay, it looks old. So there's been a nuclear attack. Don't ask me how or why I just know that the big one has hit. There's a nuclear attack. What the weapons, you know, going on now, like, would there be anything left of New York City? Who knows? Okay, this is not a Joker prank in New York City.

God damn it, just put it in the fucking thing. It's a public service announcement, you're looking at it here. You fucker. What? Here. There it is. Yes. Yes.

Establishing shots. So you know it's New York City. Yes. So there's been a nuclear attack. Don't ask me how or why. Just know that the big one has hit. Okay. Sean, don't ask.

So there's been a nuclear attack. So you want to be a gambler. Ask me how or why. Any. been a nuclear attack. So you want to be a gambler. Ask me how or why? Any. I just got to go. Your imagination doesn't matter. Good of an eyes. Good of a bad guy. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. I mean, the end result for you is the same. The big one is hit. The big one is hit.

Hey, California, we California. What the fuck is going to? That's that's bitch. The earthquake that the big, when the big one hits. Don't fucking, don't take our term. Okay, so what do we do? There are three important steps that I want you to remember. Step one, get inside. Get inside, you, your friends, your family, get inside.

And no, staying in the car is not an option. You need to get into a building and move away from the windows. There's been a nuclear attack. I would say that you probably wouldn't know there's a nuclear attack until there's a nuclear attack. Besides, the windows are gone, we know that. Oh yeah, don't get inside.

Go inside. The windows are not gonna be. The windows are all blown out. What are you talking about? If you haven't been vaporized, get inside. Go inside. The windows are not gonna be. The windows are all blown out. What are you talking about? If you haven't been vaporized, get inside as quickly as possible. They're talking about Russia, right? The Russia's long-term nuclear attack. The whole world is done.

It's North Korea. It's done. Whoever has fucking nuclear weapons, whoever gets it on. I just assume this is part of a fear-mongering campaign. What happened about Russia? Like why else would it exist? I don't fucking know. Step two, stay inside.

Okay. Shut all doors and windows. Okay. Have a basement. Head there. Yeah, I have a basement in New York City. Sure, no problem. We'll fit my entire building in there.

Oh, sure. If you don't have one, get as far into the middle of the building as possible. If you were outside after the blast, get clean immediately. Remove and bag all outer clothing to keep radioactive dust or ash away from your body. Don't worry, it's all you've already taken a lethal dose.

I think it's too much. Follow media for more information. Follow the media. You've taken about 50 grays of fucking hard radiation. You're gonna start vomiting in about 15 minutes. Bag it. You'll be dead within six hours. So like, shit, I heard the window.

What do you mean, bag it? Bag it. Okay. Nation, don't forget to sign up for notify NYC for official alerts and updates. Oh, okay. And don't go outside until officials say it's safe. How? All right.

We've got this. Who? Wait, what does that say? We got this? Yeah, do you've got this, I think? Follow and don't go outside until officials say it's safe. All right, you've got this. Ah.

Who? How would this subject come up? Like, who brought this up in a meeting of some sort? Kind of. And said, you know, we really need a nuclear attack PSA. Yeah. We need that. We've been a little, you know, slacking on that. It could happen.

I mean, we have a question. We're all dead though. What do we want to put in the PSA? You know, like, status survive. You can't pretend it's like a... So basically, they're talking about, they're talking about, like, you know, like, miles and miles from New York City. Everybody in New York City is dead. I guess.

So the bomb doesn't have like a tracking device on it? I don't know. I don't know. Is Miss the target. Okay. Minecraft, Nick says that Minecraft guy who sent an email, if you see this hit me up, I went through it and won. It can be an ear. Okay.

What, what, the guy who is trying to leave his wife, family. Okay, that guy says to hit him up, but he didn't really give any information. Said for us to hit him up. Okay, that guy says to hit him up, but he didn't really give any information. Said for us to hit him up? No, that guy. Oh, he was leaving his... Maybe he's done it. Yeah, he's that's what he said.

Mike says, a dickhead dies in the wilderness. Hey guys, a Canadian dickhead here checking in with news from the North. Canadian dickhead was deleted by the wilderness. There isn't a lot of confirmed information, but what's known is here. And then there's a guy that, the article that says,

a man found dead after he took a trip into the Yukon backcountry. Might be worth mentioning in case any listeners are wondering where he went. So go fuck yourselves except for Sean. Smooches for Sean. Love Mike. Let's see.

Shit, what's his, well, you know, I can say a name, right? Is he? Well, he linked to an article where a man is found dead. Let's see if they say a man has been found dead. Yeah. If we took an extended trip into the Yukon. Did they mention him?

Oh, thank you. He says, an Evan pain Russell had packed in plan for an extended trip into the Yukon. And he was dead. He was found with, uh, left almost 10 months ago. I'm not this ass. Wow. That's a horrible.

Um, how would they put that? The exact, their exact destination. And Mitchell Fitchin also 28 years old. Both were from Pharaoh Yukon. The report shared on July 19th, police concerned that Russell had been found dead on July 1st. Okay. They found them in the 69 position, it says. Frozen, 16.

You just know nothing is sacred. Well, it's probably a prank. Yeah. That article's probably a prank. Yeah. That article is probably a prank. Thank you for listening. Yeah, thanks. Sorry, that that happened to you. I guess if you knew that guy.

Okay, here is more SSSRI stuff. Eric Flex's Fat Watch submission. Enjoy. Okay. Huh? Fat Watch. Today in the back room. Stere-tere-tere-tere. Thank you, Eric.

Let's see what you've got. You guys have to give me some context for these things. So I can build them up a little bit. Supernatural workout near go far. Share to post. Meet our guest coach. Oh, no. Okay, so this is the supernatural workout. Meet our new guest coach, Chesney, Mariani, stopped at nothing to build a fitness journey that worked for her for going a path that revealed the coach within her.

Maybe two coaches within her. She joined the supernatural community in August, 2020, made a commitment to work out daily and celebrated herself every step of the way. She worked out one day and then was a coach the next. See, they have a video like women just have a baby. Then they know everything about being a mother and they want to talk to their friends who are thinking about having babies. It's like, huh?

Yeah. This happens. This happens. This happens with people. They, and they're right because women don't, women know everything that there is to know about something as soon as it happens to them and they don't learn any more. Chesiting Mariani's supernatural guest coach. She's doing a promo video for this as a coach and she's wearing a VR helmet.

She's got short pink hair with shaved sides of her head. I don't have any questions about the VR helmet. She's got short pink hair with shaved sides of her head. I've got questions about the VR helmet. She's wearing a bra on some of her flab. Her arms are about the size of my thighs. More, actually bigger. And she's thrashing them around, who are those guys in WrestleMania? The Bushwackers? The Bushwackers? Yeah, she's thrashing them around like, who are those guys in WrestleMania? The Bushwackers?

The Bushwackers? Yeah, she's thrashing them around like the Bush, she's done a Bushwacker simulator. Here you go. Does she have? Don't be scared to be seen. Here we go. Took me 38 years to break out of my shell.

This is something that I it's shitting around. Is that the coach or is this the, the lady on the bottom is the coach? No, I think the, I think the It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, but she'll, oh, we got it a second. Should we be away? I'm tired, like, thought would happen. She's crying from VR. I didn't feel like I had a long business.

She's walking on the beach, but I'm wrong. It's like that green CPA. It's too hard for me to get the weight off because I've got polycystic ovarian syndrome. People will just look at you and take the absolute worst. No. You walk down the street and somebody yells out the window, you are too fat to be seen in public, you should put a paper bag on your head.

Oh, wait a minute. That's a long, right? I've yelled at many people. Right. Out of the car. You got to, you have to keep in mind the Doppler effect. Three, four words. Yes.

Or you're going to get, they're only going to hear, yeah, be up that back. I'm the car. Yeah. If you want your insults to head, if you're yelling out the side of your car, you got to go, Hey, fatso. Or whoa, oh, tobi, Lardo. Hey, hey, yeah, two or three syllables is about what you get. Hey, fat ass. Woo, shake it, fatso! Like that, you can be constructing, what does she say? It's been harder for me to be a part of the audience. You have to be seen in public, you should put a bag over your head. You have to be seen in public,

you better not be a part of my eye over your head. Yeah, that's no good. Kinda rolls off the tongue. Uh, okay. I wanted to try anything I could. I would dread going into the gym. I didn't feel that enough about myself. I wanted to get a bike, but they were too expensive.

And I just thought that I would never find any type of physical activity that I would enjoy. And I thought I was gonna die. I thought I was gonna die early. You might. Yeah, you might. And I found some actual woods, yeah, there. I'm just starting to get a cow. It's not, you know, you might. When I found out, I know what it's yeah, the hair. I mean,

just started. I'm going to. It's not, you know, a little bit of VR isn't going to. I'm going to unclog your arteries. Yeah, I mean, talking about. Uh, okay. And that's all she wrote.

Okay, so imagine you're standing in your living room. You put on this small headset and suddenly you're standing at the foot of a glacier in Iceland or on the Great Wall of China. A coach meets you there and then guides you as you smash targets to the beat of your favorite music and it means that you have a great role after Mongolia and to the river. And there's no judgment.

Just you feel like it's powerful and losing yourself. Shout out, lady. So that's the, yeah, it's like a big ad for this shit. Yeah. Whether she is again, share your fitness journey. And we've put together a little slideshow that we wanna share with you.

You at every step shared with total transparent is to be a coach. You've shown us and we're so proud. What? And we really would love to bring you out to be a guest coach so that we can help make this dream a reality. Yeah. No, you used to could just be able to she's crying clarified butter.

Well, you think that's bad. You used to be. I mean, I couldn't I should probably ask my husband, but I think you're that's bad. You should be. I mean, I could have, I should probably ask my husband, but I think you're okay with it. Every one of our coaches will tell you this. Yeah, you're like, give out of here. If your heart wants you to help other people in this way, then like you've got the qualifications

and the rest of it is so easy. You're having equal obligations, you're 600 pounds. What the fuck are you talking about? This is all just, you know, this is all just posturing. This is all, it's all to boost the, you know, the coaches. Yeah, like PR experimentability. Oh, look at how inclusive. Look at it.

It's just, I don't know, man. Like I just, I don't, just don't, I just, I just, I just don't believe any of this on the level of, that they're doing it for like, you know, pure reasons. I just don't believe any of this on the level of, that they're doing it for pure reasons. That's cool. Skinny and hot women are. She's doing this interview, like buttering up,

they're slob, telling her what an inspiration she is, and you're gonna be a coach and making up all this work. I'm just making fun of you, because you're fat, right? Those wait. I mean, stop eating, do exercise. I don't know, I just think one, I think one is more honest than the other. Yeah, it's way worse.

Okay, I hope she gets skinny. Yeah, I mean, that'd be great. All right, Alex, let's see what you've got today for us. Things plus size travelers hate part you. Just oxygen. Towels that don't fit. People staring all the time. It's a beach towel.

She has oxygen. On the plane. Just oxygen on the plane. Did she get the, is she, is she gonna also take it from the overhead, the panel overhead? She's trying to double it up. This lady's already got oxygen over here. Yeah, exactly. Let me just see that again.

I mean, the things that plus size travelers. Things plus size travelers. She's there with her husband. Who's? Two plus size travelers. Hit part two. She's got oxygen two plus size travelers. Hit port two. She's got oxygen.

Oh man. Shut up. No. Do you think they like both use it and they try, they steal the like they sneak oxygen from like the other one so they can like get a little bit splitting headphones. Yeah. We got one set of headphones.

You listen to a rideier, I'll listen to leftier, right? One time my nieces had each had ice cream cones, and one of them asked the other one to hold her ice cream cone while she climbed into the car. And the other one took a huge bite out of it, and then there was a, you know, it was when it handed it back to her as a huge fucking fight. Uh-huh.

I'm thinking this happens with oxygen canisters. Oxygen like crack for them? I don't know. Like, because they can't breathe normally, so no. Oh God, oh yeah, I can get it. I give it to me. Give me that sweet oxygen. Okay.

So they're on the plane taking up, I mean taking up your seat. Like if you're on this plane, you're hating them. Cause you paid a normal amount and you're not a big fatso and they're ruining your trip. That's what, that's something that plus size travelers hate. Part two. Okay. Here. Hey, part two. Towels that don't do indeed that is a beach towel. Towels that don't fit. Oh, wow. You cannot expect't call it a towel. You have to bring your own.

You have to know this. You have to bring. Two. There's no towel that big. No. People staring all the time. Well, you're wearing them. They've never seen that many polka dots before in their life.

Right. Right. I mean, most parents- They've never seen that. What would there be like 60, 70 polka dots? There's like 12,430 on that thing. It's the surface area is incredible. Nobody's ever seen a beach towel wrapped halfway around someone. Right.

That's the issue. Yeah. Uh, bunk beds. Wouldn't you know where you book? Oh my God, there's no way. Do that. That thing couldn't hold me. I said I can't rewind a little bit. Souvenirs shops that don't have your size. That's for a reason. They don't want their, they don't want nobody wants.

Life size replica of Epcot center on a person walking around. I mean, we have enough problems at the Dixho live events. Staff is like, you know, stalking shirts that are big enough, right? I mean, when they're shops that don't have your size, Chubrub. Oh, Chubrub. Chubrub. Chubrub. This is like, you've ever heard that before? It's similar like she said, Chubrub. That was the, I know, the voice. Yeah. Chobrub. That's for when you're fat of your jeans, rubs together. That's called Chobrub. Yeah, and it made holes in your jeans. Yeah. Because they're walking. Yeah. Wow. Cheers with armrests, of course. the natural, the mortal enemy of, Right.

Plus, the mortal enemy of human width. Yeah. Oh. Getting stuck with two twin mattresses instead of a king. Things plus size travel. Oh, okay. Was that it? Yeah, that was it.

All right. Twins instead of a, instead of a king. Thank you. Good God. Whoever sent that in Alex. Thanks for that 90s post live Podman. What's that sent this one in oh? Crying real tears right now. This is a I don't know tender profile. It says eat the rich on it She looks like she already did.

Yeah. Sir does. She's wearing her grandmother's drapes. Yeah. Yeah, that's an issue as well. Okay. How about anymore of these? Oh, here's one.

Ryan Stone says, I was fast-shamed by my gym for canceling my membership. Is that legal? What do you think? Yes, sir. Is it legal? Is that legal? Do I have a case?

Do I have a case? Do I have a case? Do I have a case? Do I have a case? There's been a total turnover of the gym apologized. There's been a turnover of staff at that particular location. They use food terms to try to get on their good side when they're apologizing to fat people like turnover. As you have that particular restaurant-loving.

Yeah, yeah. I've Been in members since 2019. All you can do is apologize. There's no way to keep a customer. Jim memberships are notoriously difficult to get out of. But one tick-tock user alleges her Jim fat-shamed her when she tried to leave. User Alexi Ro 23. Wow. So she was a member of any time fitness in 2019 for around six months, but decided to quit as she was using the local YMCA more. No

That's not what happened No, that's not what happened when she went to cancel She was told they wouldn't do it not until she'd completed their three She was told they wouldn't do it not until she'd completed their three Three free personal training sessions. I'm pretty sure anytime fitness. Oh, that's shame to me. Oh, that's it She said in the clip right Yeah, they wanted to you know make sure you're yeah It was like they'll be free to you. I should set you up with somebody

You really just need to try it first She added in a tick tock which has been viewed more than 600,000 times. That's it. That's fat shaming. So nothing. That was fat shaming. What the fuck? This is absolutely not okay. Dude, the fatties are something that's included with the membership. Yeah. That has nothing to do with fat shaming. Oh, fuck you. Okay, one more, one more, one more. Yeah. Big time sipping fat girl, summer of tiktok or changes, something, professions.

Let's see here. Lowell Moore fat watcher, oh, a fashion influencer discusses creating clothing for curvy women. Oh, a fashion influencer discusses creating clothing for curvy women. I think women who are changing the game this morning were focusing on fashion, finding the right clothes, you know, can be hard, especially if you're curvy. Can I be bigger than the other girls? I know something about that. Christine Thompson decided.

Quite a bit bigger. This is very, I don't know. That's not her, is it? No, this is their model. Oh, he's just wearing like a tent, fabric. Right? It's a lot of material. This is a lot of material. It's a lot of material.

It's a lot of square yards. Pro, it's a fucking fashion segment about, quote, curvy women that are, she's got to be too sick. It looks like a dress shirt for a 25 foot tall man. It almost looks like it's buttons down the middle. Doesn't it look like I was tucking shirt, you know, looks like a dress shirt kind of. Okay. She was going to do something about it back in 2013.

What'd she do? She started posting tips on social media to help women celebrate their bodies. Here's a look at Christine and Anne. Just fucking loose weights. Tip number one, loose clothing that is meant to hide your body will never make you look good. Instead, aim to accentuate your waist hide your body will never make you look good. Instead, aim to accentuate your waist and create balance between your top and bottom half. Tip number two. So that's how full people. Yeah, it's all about fat trickery. Yeah, yeah.

Here's a regular t-shirt that she has on where she looks dumpy as hell. Yeah, she goes right, showing you how to do bamboozle. I do nothing for you, buddy. Or men. Instead of for a curved him, that's such a shape. So she cuts her shirt into like a unitarred something. So it dips that much. I mean, it's like an optical illusion. It's an optical trickery. Yeah.

So basically, you're not. And tip number three, embrace patterns. Prince actually tricked the eye and make it about truth. Yeah. You're not two. You're not okay with yourself. Prince actually tricked the eye and make it about your. Yeah, you're not okay. It's like you're not okay being fat. You're not showing off your body. You're trying to make your body look better than it is. Yeah, yeah.

Uh, here's the, this, this tip is to use a bunch of patterns to confuse. Right. And camouflage your right size. Right. Like you're hunting for bear. Full look. True, true, Thompson now has one and a half million followers on TikTok. She also launched her own clothing line. Thank you very much.

It's called Ken by Christine back in 2019. And good news guys, you'll soon be able to get it in North. North strums. Oh, fuck you. Nordstroms. On Tuesday. Good morning to Christine Thompson and Bravo to you. Thank you.

So most of us bitch and complain in moan about clothes, but you decided to do something about it. Crashed bitch and complain about, yeah, bitch on the more news. Yeah. Crashed bitch and complain of a bitch on the way news. Yeah, little No standards anymore little business bitch and complain and moan. I mean, you know, I was a venom too those Very angry. I started making your own things. Yeah. Yeah, so my mother taught me how to sew when I was younger I didn't really pay too much attention to it because I was like I don't really know I'm eating, but as I got older and I'm going to fix your own seams next birthday. So last year I do this.

I don't care about this. I do. That's a big, that's a big. I'll get used to it. That's the fucking future. All right. That's watch. Oh, that's no more. I'm starting to see it in my sleep.

That's that's it. Snow more. I'm starting to see it in my sleep. That's not a joke, yeah. Here we go, some advice. Gypsy risking says, Dixho relationship extraction services needed. I love the section the other week on helping guys pull the rip cord on shitty relationships and I thought I could use the same kind of advice. I learned that my fiance, Beacups,

has been cheating on me. Mm-hmm. Cool. And while how did you learn that? And while she's trying to finagle us into an open relationship, excuse me, I can see that the writing is on the wall. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Well, I was just cheating on me. And she's trying to trick me into an open relationship. I'm starting to think that this relationship might not have a future. Okay.

I'm certainly seeing that the writing is on the wall and I won't be having kids with her down the line. Oh, I think, don't count yourself out, bud. I'm very much able to make a clean break and start overfresh. Okay. However, she comes from a ton of money. And we've been all but guaranteed a one million dollar house from her parents when we marry. And that could, depending on where he is in the country,

that could actually mean something. Cause around here it don't mean shit. I mean, it's still money. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You take it and cash out and leave. You could, um, oh God, you poor bastard. You've poor bastard. They have a ton of money.

And I know I would be able to get my fiance to sign a prenup. What the fuck does you, do you think that mean? Fucking castanza. You think that means you're gonna get her to like sign you a house and then you gotta court and say, well that's high. Look, she signed this document that says

I could have the house and then her parents with all the money in the world are gonna allow that. Are you fucking idiots? That's right, I read the thing. Yeah, how do you think this will work to your advantage marrying into money? You think you're getting a free, do you think you're getting a free half a house? Is that what you think? You're getting a free, you think you're a woman?

You just get whatever you want. Because you showed up and up in your legs. They're gonna make sure that you walk away, you walk away with what you came in with, whatever that may be. What part of the country do you even use a $1 million, $1 million plus house in? You don't use that in LA. No one would say, would you? What do you mean? Like, if you mean? You mean in a statement? Yeah. Like what's their house like? Oh, it's a million dollar house.

Like where would you use that? I wouldn't use that in LA. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, but I mean, houses that are... Is there bumpkins? That are fixer uppers in like decent areas of Burbank. I mean, there are many, many three bedroom, two bathroom houses, 1500 square feet, 14 to 1600 square feet for over a million dollars. I mean, tons, tons, built in like 1945, 1950,

a million two, a million four. You're like, wait a minute, built in like 1945, 1950, a million two, a million four. You're like, wait a minute, this is like, it's like, so where would you use 1500 square feet? But you know, other places are not that much better. Like Arizona is not crazy. Well, crazy better. Yeah, yeah, I mean, it's getting better.

The resort area is like, but it's, yeah, but it's now it's starting to come down. That would essentially give me half of her parents money down the line and a divorce that I would spearhead. You are. No, this is fucking right. You are, you will get talked into an open relationship. You fucking idiot.

Don't be too harsh on the guy, but dude, you, no, you have to be, you don't understand, I, he doesn't understand how this prenup is going to work. You have nothing, you have nothing, she doesn't, she doesn't want you at all. You are just an emotional dumping ground. You're not getting 50% of what she has. You're not getting anything. You're just wasting time.

We're in a grace period right now. So he's thinking, they'll buy, they'll buy them the house and then he'll divorce and they'll, and he'll just come, they'll buy the house and then he'll divorce and he'll just, they'll have to liquidate that and it'll, he'll get half of that. She's going to get one of her, one of her open relationship boyfriends to kill you before you get any of the house. We're in a grace period right now. And I'm now thinking of what the right play is. Should I cut loose, grace over, I don't know what a grace period means, and begin things anew, or do I take advantage of the open relationship? Oh yeah, open relationship. Well, I think you're, guys, I think you're amazing. I think you're playing a trick on yourself.

Should I take advantage of the open relationship in the meantime, get married and get a house, get a divorce and enjoy the spoils of war with a woman, go fuck yourselves, gypsy. You should have a kid. The only way you're going to get the house and any money is if you have a kid, and then you get super child support. That's the only way. Well, because then, yeah, you are forever linked. Yeah.

Um, otherwise, no, you got nothing. But have a kid. Definitely have a kid. Because this thinking is not gonna get you anywhere else. Okay, Mr. Mac, talking to a chick at Chipotle advice. Hey, Dick and John,

there's this cute girl at my local Chipotle and I'm wondering how to ask her out. She looks like a thinner version of my ex. Oh, that's okay. There's a lot in that sentence, Dunpack. It's a fairly great description. Yeah, well, it doesn't sound like it, but it is. Like I'm immediately picturing a thinner version of my ex.

Okay. Solid Cs and arresting bitch face. I wasn't picturing that, but... How should I go about talking to her? It's hard to work in small talk while there's 20 people in line behind you. Yeah. And the only thing she wants to know is what type of meat and rice I want in my bowl.

Well, you know when other people make my bowls, I have like fucking, hellacious diarrhea. But for some reason, when you make them, that's a good line. Yeah. Yeah. Right. For some reason, when you make them, right, I only ruin clean parts. Clean parts. Totally clean.

I complimented her earrings and she smiled. So hopefully, hopefully that's a good sign. Any advice would be appreciated. Go fuck yourself, Mac. He wants to hit on a girl who works at Chipotle. Yeah. Well, I mean, just hang out. I would say you have to go there when,

okay, hang out, hang out. Hang out, hang out. I'm parking lot for hours. Yeah, ask her when she went on her break. Yeah, when she got there. Then you can kind of clock her break is two hours. You get a 10 minute, four hours. You get a 30 minute for lunch, right?

Do they still do that? I don't know. I think so. You can usually clock her lunch period, or at least when she's done working. Like, ask me, do you ever close? Like, do you ever close? And is it just you in a manager?

Yeah, it was just you. Right. If it's just, yeah. Right. Creepy, not creepy at all. And say, make sure you tell her it's not creepy. Right. I just want to know if I, like, if you're alone. Right. Shope in a trench coat. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe bring her a burrito. Right. Like a competitor. She's not allowed to eat competitors. A her a burrito. Right. Like a competitor. She's not allowed to eat competitors, but it's a home made burrito. Yeah. You always make me a burrito.

Yeah, I'll make you a burrito. I brought you a burrito. There's nothing in it. That's bad. That's weird. Right, at all. Yeah, just a normal burrito that I made from home. Right.

It's been in my pocket for half an hour on the drive over here. Yeah, that's cool. That's okay. It's totally cool. It's in Reynolds' rap. Uh an hour on the drive over here. Yeah, that's cool. That's okay. It's totally cool. It's in Reynolds' rap. Uh, play up your value. Yeah. Like one day, I'll, one day I will...

I think I'll spring for the large soda today. Yeah. I don't know. You've, you've got some change to throw around. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let me get, uh, actually, I'm in order for the office. Right. I'm coming in. I'm ordering for the office. The fuck am I gonna do with 16 burrito bulls? For 10 have a conversation.

Yeah. No, Mr. Tom Cruise. Yeah. Uh, okay, that's what I'll order for you. Right. Um, for your benefit, for your gala, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I'd like to, I'd like to place an order for that guy I was talking to on the phone.

Don't worry about who it was. Yeah, yeah. All right, that's pretty good. If that doesn't work, just hang out after, hang out after her shift. Yeah. It works. If it didn't work,

go in at an odd time if you wanna go talk to her. Yeah. Just like when there's not 20 people, you know, behind. Yeah. And then, not at lunch hours, you're saying? Like, like, if you actually wanna, like, you make a little small talk, like, you know, she might fucking talk to you a little more

if there's not 10 people waiting in line behind you. Yeah, and then just don't let her go. And you're going like, hey, push the fucking broom around. Yeah, I go like, if you're waiting in line, go, oh my God, I can't believe I just made all this money. Oh, fuck, I just got to, I just like if you're waiting like oh my god, I can't believe I just made all this money. Oh fuck I just got I just want a trip. I just won tickets to Whatever show and I have no one to go with

Because that ever happened can you believe that crazy just my luck right just my luck this happened Yeah, my girlfriend just died. I was hotter than you She looked like you Right, but hotter right girlfriend just died. It was hotter than you. She looked like you. Right, but hotter. She just died. I didn't kill her. And here I am with two tickets. And no one to go with.

No one to go with. That's pretty good advice. Sure. All right, everybody. Oh shit, we left up this fat thing. I was going to show Patreon.com slash dick show. See ya, see ya, see ya! We'll do voice mails now.

Mmm, mmm. Presenting! Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey Oh, sorry miss that. I know me too. Some reason he thought we were recording it new and well, Let's get that in your head. This is Dr. Beagle here. A little rage here. I work at vet clinic and earlier this week, we had a cat come in and we have a computerized system, the log

information about the pet. And in this cat, a veterinary note, it includes that the cat is a neutered male that goes by she slash her crown out. I was left utterly. Oh, I hope that's a joke because it's kind of funny. One level of insanity. If it's not to decide that your cat identifies as a female, it's a whole nother level to think that it's important enough to tell your veterinarian. Oh, God.

Look, all I'm saying, you know, I'm not a PETA supporter. Peta? Oh, PETA. PETA. Oh, I think it's a PETA. But in this case, you may want to call PETA and have him waiting at the back door when this cat comes in because, you know, the hopefully, you know, merciful death that PETA and have him waiting at the back door when this cat comes in because you know The hopefully you know merciful death that PETA will immediately give that cat

Pales in comparison to living with those people They're they've probably tried to make it vegetarian. Oh god. Oh look who's gone right now look at this It's a little tech-size e-haul for me. Ooh, from the bottom of your eye. Little sneak peek of the floor. I'm a little town. I appreciate you, you can check for the day. Always so generous, you talk to him. I appreciate you. She's still trying to decipher what zero phasal said.

I think you're hot. You never get to watch it live, you know? Do super tight really hot episode this week, I think. Do we relax or next week? Are you talking about like a train piston? What? Is that where you're talking about their zero phasor?

Is that what you mean? Okay. Alright. Get to voicemails. There we go. Hey, Dick, long time listener. Well, of the biggest problem. And I just recently started listening to the Dick show.

I don't know why I didn't start sitting there. But I'm only up to episode 53. I actually have a lot of questions. I'm going to ask you guys to ask me if you have any questions. I'm going to ask you guys to ask me if you have any questions. I'm going to ask you guys to ask me if you have any questions. I'm going to ask you guys to ask me if you have any questions. I'm going to ask you guys to ask me if you have any questions. I'm going to ask you guys to ask me if you have any questions. I'm going to ask you don't know why it starts in there, but I'm only up to episode 53. I actually have 20 story about how I reached

out and that that's still relevant. Yeah, of course. range. What would you mean? In the middle of getting a civil service job, which involves building the taxpayers. a civil service job which involves doing the tax payers. So I tell people the next step is just passing the psych test. Yeah. And everyone tells the same stupid joke. Oh no. Yeah.

The psych test. That's going to be an issue. That's going to be it is you for you. It's funny. the first fucking time. Funny every fucking time. Anyway, that's what makes me a rake. Oh god. Oh boy. Bazinga!

Well, what's your backup plan? Oh, fuck! That's the funny you should have ever had! Oh God. Why are people like that? What do they use comedy for? There's so much fucking diet advice on the internet. You can't.

Everybody can place everybody else. But I did a bunch of research and I actually found the perfect diet. Stop eating. Turns out it's the one that I don't have to hear about. All right. Okay. Now, yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Good. Yeah. That'll work. Okay. Good for you. Officer Shodd. Officer?

Yes. What did I do? This is the best thing for the swatting. uh officer officer what i do swatting god all the time go fuck yourself what i was doing when you were doing a when you're talking like this over the microphone i correct myself up with that i admit it

that's pretty good in the shower. Like, officers, you had in the shower. No, I've never done my life before. You never? No. I wonder that's going to be your thing. I don't know.

I need to date your feelings. No, I don't know. Respect. Yeah, but you were doing it too. You started it. Well, I wasn't as good as it edit though. Well, I don't know. I don't know where my talents lie until I try things sometimes.

Okay, let's see. Okay. You want? Guess we need another swatting. I think sometimes. Okay, let's see. Okay, here one. Guess we need another spot. I have a big shot. I wish. So I've got one today. Age, iron, real, slow and deep. Okay.

People that work from home. Yep. With terrible equipment and working conditions. I don't want to hear what your mom has to say about grocery shopping or your five kids screaming in the background as you use a potato for a microphone. Yeah. And then I have to ask you to repeat your own conversation. Get a fucking hat sad.

Because I can't understand what the hell you're saying. And you try to pass it off as like, oh, the word just really building today. Oh, I know you're working from home. I can fucking hat sad. I can keep your family in the background, tell them to shut the fuck up or move somewhere. Yeah, when you can actually do your job.

Happens all the time. To me, when you're car. And you then I happens all the time. To be more in your car. To be more in you than I have to. And constantly ask you or see yourself. And for God's sake, if there's a disruption, don't address it. I would just. Right day.

And go fuck yourself. If there's a bunch of kids running around or whatever, or there's some sort of an internet issue, just do us all a favor and don't fucking Manchin it kids running in and out Don't say it don't say it don't say it. Oh, maybe you just all saw my kids shut the fuck up shut up shut up shut up Oh my thing we know we all saw it we all fucking saw it none of us were like oh god Oh shit, we're a bunch of kids running around in there. Yeah, holy shit. I sure hope someone's I just I'm not hallucinating

I know that there's got to go skids running around oh my god Do they get loose from the basement? There's there's some kind of mystery kid running around your house So they know holy shit don't we know there's ropes on their wrists should we call someone we call someone I'm gonna die on nine one and if they don't say that the kids ran into the room. I'm gonna hit though I'm gonna hit the call button right just to be safe and Say there's a guy who killed his wife there Dance get ahead sad sad right all right Hmm

Hey, you know it makes me a rage. I just learned how to use the RSC lift as they call it Which is like a sideways for clip. Oh, where I've seen that sideways for a clip. One of my mind is how narrow they make the lanes where you stick your free. Counterproductive because they really got a little bit wider. Get more in there. No, the shit would fall down. And because the shit's already falling down, it has nothing to do with me. I'm not going to sit down, but he's doing it anyway. That's cool. I'm really fucked up because these lanes are smaller than the fucking shopping cart

return thing. You got to speak, tiles and piles of freight and size, little ass fucking this little strip. A strip, okay. uh... train strip of you know he's talking about cia knocking on we we

i can't believe we get to watch the apple spider oh just a night with a lot of bling spiders canals by the

heyday the panel spiders, camel spiders, those Hadobs, those are camel spiders. Oh, look at this. Yeah, those are, that is. Yeah. Oh, shit. Oh, my God. They're not real spiders,

but they're, they're not real spiders, but they're, but they're fucking horrifying. Okay. Well, man, I don't know what you're at. Hey, stick. Steve's calling.

I got a rage for you. Okay. I got written up two days for yelling at one of my co-workers and calling them a fat fuck. And then when I had a meeting with the production manager and the HR lady and a fat fuck, he told us all something to the means of like, what is it? If I was a few years younger, I would have laid them out.

Oh God. I don't know. I'm a huge up for it. Let's go. If you want to make threats we can go outside. Yeah, promptly. Now it's great enough for something else. He gets his ass too. Oh good.

Yeah, good. He's good. He's like, oh man, we thought he was out complaining about us. We've been calling fat retards and stupid fucking things like that. Oh, we've been. And we got a nice good laugh at it. That's cool. But, uh, yeah, go fuck yourself.

Very good. Very good. Uh, you ever have a HR altercation? No. No, me either. Sounds like a nightmare. I've never worked in a place that had an HR department. No. Um, my friend was telling me about his HR experience. He's got like six pages worth of

write-ups. Has he been in trouble a lot? I mean, yeah, but it's just, it could be anything. Well, the wrong person doesn't like you. Oh, I know. They can just go to H. I know. I know. All day. Yeah. And file anything. For sure. And there's no, there will never be a penalty for it. So it's so strange. Okay.

Last one. Last one. A, you know, makes me a rage is motorcycle clubs blocking for your four fucking lanes on the highway because everybody got a right to get there. Get right to get there. And we all wear. Didn't South Park do a thing on this? And we all wear our hearty branded boots that are twice as expensive and garbage. And we ride our unique, loud hearties everywhere to get there.

It's like the South Park episode. Well, they're about being mild. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck yourself. Yeah. Fucking blocking an on-ramp. So let your gas pass.

Fuck you. I'm in. Yeah, I get it. He ain't running over. He ain't wrong. They do buy like, they do buy a lot of like Harley brand stuff that's really expensive. I guess it, there are definitely like the yuppie, you know, like they're kind of,

they took up the lifestyle in their fifties. Yeah. You know, I separate that from the people who grew up like that. Yeah. I give the people who grew up that way more respect. And they gotta have like, it's not just like a couple guys going in the freeway.

It's like a hungry guy. I know. I've seen some big ones. Okay. I think like a head of state in the freeway. It's like a on dream guy. I know. I've seen some big ones. Okay. You think like a head of state was in for the fucking town or something like it's like the fuck I expect like three black limousines to be following. Yeah.

Okay, last one for real. All right, for real. Hey, Dick, hey Sean. Yeah. Totally take care. You want to piss me off the fucking. Oh. I'm just gonna scrap the moment. Okay. No, totally take here you want to piss me off the fucking oh My sister at the moment. Okay. She is when I'm trying to tell her

Things that piss me off about women. Mm-hmm. She thinks I'm being sexist But I'm not trying to I'm not being fucking sexist over here and being objective. No not being fucking sex with the hearing being objective. No. Anyway, I hope you got what I mean. Charmed one, unlike the last one, where I was just a drunk rambling mess. Much more cruel, co-earant. I get what you mean.

You're not being objective. I get what you mean, though. You just can't talk. Women will never give, no matter who they are. You just say, they'll never give you that. Like, yeah, you know what, you're right. Yeah, fucking women. They'll never give no matter who they are. You're just, they'll never give you that. Like, yeah, you know what, you're right. Yeah, fucking women. They'll never give you, they will never give you a,

yeah, fucking women. No woman will ever give you that. Fucking women. Yeah, that's all you need. I know exactly what you mean. No matter what, it all comes down to a, yeah. Fucking women, man. And that's what you need. A matter what, it all comes down to a, yeah. Fucking women, man. And that's what you need.

A woman will go along with you, they'll walk you through it. Oh yeah, well, you know, she probably had low self-esteem and you kind of sought that out because you have emotional probably. Like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, what are you talking about me here? What are you talking about me?

They all try to lead you back with a carrot of validation and then all they all try to lead you back to you. When all you're looking for is a fucking women man. It's for them to say, you know what? You're 100% right. You're 100% right. Yeah, everything you're saying is right. Right, everything.

Everything. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha They'll never give that to you. Okay, bye everybody. See ya, thank you.