The Dick Show - Episode 321 - Dick on Pegging

Episode Date: August 16, 2022

Demons, Tornado Cash, the IRS, Nick Rekieta guest co-hosts, and Pani talks about pegging; all that and more on this episode of The Dick Show!

Nick, what are you wearing? I'm wearing a shitty tank top because I just got back from the fucking Caribbean and I don't feel like wearing clothes at all. Ever again? Literally ever again. Yeah. That's how I feel sometimes. That's how I feel.

And then I see the pictures of it and I go, I got to put some clothes back on. You look bad. But I never, I never understood nudists until now. Now I'm like, why the fuck would anybody wear clothes ever? Yeah. Yeah. That's great. It's great.

The problem with nudism is the other people. Yes. Oh, 100%. There's a, there's a party naked camp at Burning Man that we go to every year. That's like everyone takes their clothes off and drinks at a bar and pretends it's normal and gets like a little lay, like a, you know, hot, a, a, why thing.

But some people are really freaked out about it. They're like going to panic attacks, just taking their clothes off in public. Yeah, I don't know. It's like not that big of a deal, right? Like you've seen a million dicks and a million vaginas in your life who fucking cares. Yeah, unfortunately. Yeah. And then there's people that are too into it. Like there's this guy that's got like an entire stapler down the underside of his cock. Oh, yeah, yeah. yeah. The fucking like the piercings? Yeah, and he's like the mayor of naked down,

going around introducing himself, like I can go like, man, just fuck off already with you. Yeah, he's like, I put electrodes at each end every night. Yeah, I see only way I can get stimulated. Here's, here's some chopsticks. You can play on my wiener. How you been? Are you rested up from whatever you were doing in Dungeons and Dragons? Oh my god. That was that just kept going, but it was fun. So it's okay, but it's normally

supposed to end at 10. So sorry about that. 10, my time. You guys are trying to take all the whiteness out of D&D by running the eight. Is that it? Yep. Exactly. Okay. Well, I also, my character, my character seduced a fresh widow, of course, right at the end. So, you know, like a spider or a woman whose husband died? Yeah, woman whose husband died. Do you? I don't fuck spiders, that's weird. Well, I don't know what you're doing over there. I mean, I try anything once or twice.

I guess. You wouldn't, wait a minute, you wouldn't fuck a spider lady all the time you spend an anime world and you've never encountered a spider that you would fuck, is that what you're saying? I didn't say a spider lady, I just said a spider, like an actual spider. I'm not good at gendering spiders at first glance, but if it's got the lady parts sticking out the top,

then you know, it's a little more comfortable. Yeah, would you rather fuck a spider lady with a spider top half or a spider bottom half? The fish ones easy. Yeah. The mermaid ones easy. I think I'd want the lady top half. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like there's lots of room and a giant human-sized spider vagina. So, do they have vaginas? We need to show them here for the animal, what the corner shit to figure that one out.

They've got to have like an egg sack thing like the fucking alien queen, right? Yeah, yeah, they have an egg sack. Okay. Well, let's get started. Do you have stuff after this? Nope, I'm free. Holy shit. As long stuff after this? Nope, I'm free. Holy shit.

As long as you want to fuck around, I'm here. Okay. You haven't talked in forever, man. I know it has been a long time. Okay, let's get this shit started. Thank you for filling in. Oh, my pleasure. Sean has stupid work.

How's the volume on your end? It's good for me. Slower than that tank top. Nothing is. I allow myself to do it on the piano. Yeah! How are you? You need to do it. You guys are show-ups. Got this gonna be a lot for him. I'm fucking deep now to see a pair of your... I'm house like Madison, I get 20 million dollar man joining me for the first time as guest co-host because Sean can't be here because he's working down at the ass factory in Icricada the world's the internet's lawyer

Hey, what's up, man? Hey, what's up? How are you? Who are you beefing with what celebrities and journalists hate you and are getting their panties and a twist and Talking about how irrelevant you are every day. There's an do it. These these internet journalists are not real journalists They don't check facts like us. They don't have the fuck checkers. They're not checking their facts. They don't do things like if they call someone a racist, they call all their family and say, were you aware that so and so was a racist? We're doing real journalism, dammit.

They're irrelevant. You got a lot of this lately? Well, for the past month, no, because I've been gone. And it's been, I mean, people may have been saying it, but I haven't been on the internet at all except for little snippets here and there, but I haven't been reading shit. I'm in following anything. I know nothing about anything. I'm sorry. Are you like, nope, you're your last big blowout, the Johnny Depp stuff.

Are you charging up for the Maryland Manson thing? What's next? I've been, I've been furiously masturbating the entire time waiting for Maryland Manson to take the stand. That's why you're in that tank top. I can then it's just gonna be top off. This is a greater, this is a better outfit. You know, it really makes us out.

But it's the, oh, I thought that was a gold chain that you're wearing. Like, oh, go ahead. It's just my headphones. I wish. I'm not, I'm not that cool yet, but we'll make it happen. So you're at the Caribbean recently. Yeah, I got back. So we flew back. We dropped my kids off with my parents in Florida. Wow. Then I went to Houston for an anime No, it's not. You know, hot. Yeah.

I'm coming. They can't get that together. Seriously. I'm coming. They can't send everybody soap and like a wash brush because I know those fat fucks can't reach all their crevices. They have those fucking clean rooms in the movies. Like when they're walking in for that area, it's like just blast with the steam or whatever. The pennies do this out to scrub them down like in 12 monkeys, right? They have to walk across like nine different pool solutions. So their feet get fucking disinfected or whatever. It's so fucking bad.

It's so bad. The bio in that crowd is so bad. It's got to be stopped anyway. And it's in, it was in Houston, Texas in July too. So there's, there's no escape every, every fucking day outside. It's 150 degrees, 100% humidity. But, but the convention's actually a ton of fun. It was, it was a good time. I had a, I had my own booth at one point. I had like fucking, over a hundred people waiting to come shake my hand

or whatever, it was very strange. Just like, hi, here's five bucks. Thanks for that. I didn't charge anything because that's, I still find that weird. Oh. Like, hi, come shake my hand and pay me for it. Yeah, I thought you were the king of drifter.

You can't be. Yeah, but I, I, I, sometimes we enter in your old. No, because it's like, well, I don't need to do this to make money. Yeah. But the people who do like anime voice actors, they get paid jack shit for their voice acting. So then that's how they actually make their living is generating popularity and then convincing people to give them like $90 for a selfie, which is fucking insane that people like

I'm like Okay, I mean, I guess I feel like those I feel like those conventions I hate to say it. I'm going to you because your audience probably loves it But it's like it's like it's like watching drug addicts when they're walking out. I'm loads of toys. I'm like, Oh, just please, just stop. Like, stop, stop buying that plastic shit. Stop.

By drugs. One counter argument. Okay. One man. Are you familiar with a dockie macara? Right. Like the big, the anime wife pillow pillow. Oh, yeah.

That's how you pronounce that. Yeah, I don't know. I did. Jizz pillow. I didn't know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The extended Jizz rag. Do you have one of those? Someone sent me actually. Yeah, I have a I have one right here. Hold on. Okay. Let's see it. It's not out. It's still in the plastic because I can't see it. It's not out. It's still in the plastic because, but it's albedo from Overlord. I can't see how big the tits are when it folded up. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, on it. That's weird. Get your wife to wear it. Convince her. It's like a Japanese nightie. Like this is a very interesting.

She'll wear that. I'm going to get her fucking costume made and she'll wear the costume to the next convention probably because yeah, no, you got to do it right. She's going to be getting more, she's going to get a booths next time. You're going to be, you're going to be on the the taking pictures. So I'm, I try, go ahead, go ahead, sorry, there was a dude who had the only wife who pillow that is acceptable to own because it's fucking like 40 feet long. it's a snake girl. And he gets on the escalator and he gets to the top and the pillow is at the fucking bottom. It's the whole thing and everybody in the whole place is just carrying the pillow. He's carrying the pillow girl with him. It's like it's nothing. Why? Why does he have it there?

To be funny, obviously not. No, because I think he just bought it. Oh, he just bought it there with a pillow. Yeah. And he's eager to get it home and ride the snake. You know what? I might be able to pull this up. Okay.

I'm sure a screen it in just a second. Please do. Uh, let me see. Where is it? Oh, yeah, here it is. Here it is. I've got the picture. Let me. People love this when I do this show pictures. Yeah, here we go. Is this present? A window. This will be very careful. Yeah, literally yes. Here we go. Okay. Should pop up. See that shit? Look at this guy.

This fucking champion is going home, coiling that thing up into a giant There we go. Oh, wow. That man always holds a house as like a snake woman that he's having sex with. He's going to go have the best masturbation of his entire life on a throne of coiled up down. It's an entire, it's the length of the entire convention escalator, which is longer than a normal escalator. That's fantastic.

Yeah, that's a that's George R Brown. So the you know, it's two stories, but you can see the fucking ceilings are like 20 feet. So it's huge. Yeah. That thing. Yeah. That was amazing. Uh, and the Caribbean, I just got back from New Mexico.

Um, and first of all, it was the first flight that I've gone on with the no mask with all the mask shit gone. Oh, yeah. Dude, it was like being back in back in the before times. Yeah. No, I it made me really angry that I was grateful to be back like set back three years. I was like, oh, yeah, I remember my thirties. That's awesome. That the very end. The just when I started appreciating my youth, the tail end of it got circumcised by the government.

I heard, I heard the following on the announcements I'd never heard before. The flight attendant gets on and says, oh yeah, I just want to let everybody know that someone has on this plane has a peanut allergy. So no one need anything, no one eat anything with nuts in it. Yeah, that's great. I love that.

It's like, oh good. So because they're crippled, we have to change our entire lives. Thanks. I never heard that in the whole plane, we weren't allowed. No one was allowed to eat any peanuts. I don't know if anyone brought them on to test it. Everybody should have just grabbed a snickers

and started smearing it on everyone they found. Just whoops, spill it down the aisle. I guess that's the new, like, that's the new, now that, now that, like, a certain amount of petty tyrants have gotten the taste of having full medical control of people, they're not going to give it up easily. So I expect a future full of, oh, well, yeah, no peanuts on this fly. Somebody's allergic to purple. So make sure if you're coming to my birthday party that you don't have anything on that end of the spectrum.

Have you encountered the smell allergies? I unironically have this just because I have a big nose. I think not like because I'm actually allergic. but like if I walk by a bath and body works, I want to kill myself immediately. Yeah, me too. And somebody told me that's because I have autism. They went to doctor though. Right. That's, that's, I think that's probably true. Probably true. For me, it's because when I breathe in, there's so much, That's probably true. Probably true.

For me, it's because when I breathe in, there's so much air and atmosphere going in that any smells are amplified. But there are people who will demand that no one wear anything scented around them ever. No colognes, no perfume, no scented deodorants, nothing, no scented tampons, nothing. It'll kill every bunch of scents. You just have. I didn't know they were scented or nonsented. Well, when you're eating them, would you want the nonsented or the right, like you just pick them up and, uh, yeah, I guess, you got the flavor. Yeah, yeah, I guess I probably would want

to flavor. Yeah, but good point. But then literally, like, nothing. You cannot have any sense that's coming, too, right? Because you're in a, we're in like a giant Pringles can. All the smell will just stay there. So everybody's just natural BO is all we'll be left with. Oh, that's problematic. That's actually problematic for me. Okay, here's one for you.

When can we put a class action lawsuit together against all of the either fat women using the face to an app or Snapchat for making it? Is that because I know in my youth, I would have thought this is that's preposterous, right? Like you can't sue the manufacturer of a thing for the evil that gets used for it. But now, now I'm not so sure. Now that's on the table. We're suing gunmenufit whatever, right? If tornado cash is getting hit by the government, what can we do to put Snapchat on the list of companies we're going after to stop the Scorsor? We've got to do something because the false advertising of fat women has got to stop the skirts. We've got to, we've got to do something because the false advertising of fat women has got

to stop. Like maybe they, you know, they got the parody tags or whatever that they started require satire tags. Yes, yes, yes. We need a fat tire tag. Fat tire? So it's like, I know this chick looks skinny, but she's actually 372 pounds. Yeah.

It's all angles, lighting and filters. Did you see that tornado cash thing? No, what happened? Oh, dude, okay, well, that's what I'll get to that first then. That's what makes me rage this week. Tornado cash is an anonymizer for cryptocurrency transactions. So if I want to send it to somebody, it goes into a big pool and then the tornado cash gives them from somebody else's. So you can no longer track transactions

through the blockchain, right? Which is absolutely fucking necessary. That's the whole point of decentralizing currency is that you can't be tracked by the goddamn government for buying the wrong toothpaste. Yeah, it's like it's so, it has infinite practical uses, right? Like you want to support some, you want to send money to somebody in Russia or Ukraine or somebody who's like a J6 guy and you got to get them legal money. You're trying to get like a woman away from an abusive spouse or trying to get a kid money to do their trans surgery. And the noble endeavor. Yes. And the illicit reasons for banning it are so small. it's offensive that anybody even runs with this story.

Like this was used by, we've detected that this was used by guys in North Korea or whatever, which I don't believe because they're all just using cash, right? Like that's where the gigantic plurality, majority, 99% of crimes are being done with cash. The idea that they're being done through this obtuse software package is assinine, but they're running with it so far that they're arresting the developers of it, which is like basic speech. The economy thing always drives me crazy. Money is the basic basic speech like the the the economy thing always drives me crazy Money is the same as speech. It should be protected just the same

But the idea that writing a fucking software package that somebody's using to to maintain their anonymous identity Which should be it should be so sacrosanct in your basic rights that they didn't even have to mention it because the idea of not having it in Anonymity was preposterous. Like the idea that there would exist a technocratic dystopia where you could be tracked and necessarily tracked it all times was so far off like,

well, we don't have to put that in there. Obviously, it's very upsetting. When all this shit was written down, there was literally no way to track something other than to actually witness what happened. Yeah. That's the only way you would know person A, paid person B is to have some sort of witness

to recount the chain of events. They didn't have fingerprinting, they didn't have like some DNA sample. They can track like individual bills beyond serial numbers, I guess, would be the only thing. And originally they didn't serialize bills, they just printed currency. And so it's like this idea that everything needs to be monitored all the time. Of course, you've talked about this forever, but it comes really heavy on the counterterrorism shit following 9-11. Oh, it's so bad.

The counterterrorism thing is such a bunch of bullshit. Yeah, go ahead, what are you saying? It's a one-two punch because the Supreme Court has, I don't remember the name of the case, but there's a ruling that leaves enough ambiguity to say that software and code is not actually speech. Oh, great. Okay. Which is, if you talk to anybody who has, like, I'm not an expert programmer, right? But knowing anybody who works in software, you know that three different people will

write the same, will tackle the same problem and have a completely different language. You have to write the language in the code in comments so that the next guy can understand what the fuck you are doing. So for them to say that it's not speech and that code is not something that is crafted and created is to disregard every advance in code ever. And it fucking infuriates me that that is that is hovering around there because it to me it is most obviously speech just at its basic core level disregarding the fact that code is unique to the language you use, how you learn to code, who taught you different tricks, how you tackle problems, all of that

is banked into the individual piece of code. And that's why it's such a fucking mess to change anything in these big systems. I hate that shit. And arresting people for writing a program that someone else might use to do something wrong maybe is fucking coursecock. And that is great. It's, it's happening more and more too, really fucking sucks. The, the might be doing something wrong with it is, is just insane.

Um, and then seeing every, seeing every big stable coin jump onto it's like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, don't worry. We're saying, don't worry. We're cutting them off. Um, which nobody, which nobody wants them to do, like knowing that benefits nobody. It could go arrest them if you don't like it. Right. Well, or just to rest the people doing the criminal act. Yeah. But it's like you said, though, we got to take it just a step back because what's,

what's obviously it's, this goes all the way back to Reagan. What is at the core of every over expanded domestic terrorism policy? It's the war on fucking drugs every single time. Oh, well, someone might use cryptocurrency to buy cocaine someday. Well, God forbid, God we have someone doing coke. Exactly. Instead of getting shit based. It's like this is it. It's like this is the crime. Like this is the crime we're always

going back to because the counterterrorism money laundering shit, it starts with counterterrorism and it always goes back to fucking weed. Every time, well, we're really concerned about who's growing this plant. We're really concerned about who's growing this plant. We're really concerned about who's snorting this. Maybe you should just fuck off. Like if they die from overdosing, maybe they just die from overdosing and you go, well, that was dumb. But other than that, they're generally just fine. You know, if they kill someone in a car under the influence, share a punisher, just

like anything else. But fucking leave everybody alone. I think it annoys me the most because it's always the same reason. Well, you know, terrorism, we got to shut down like all this stuff, all this stuff always has to be. I watched a video today that was, it was somebody, it was somebody in Florida running for some like attorney general or something. And he said, we should, the state of Florida should arrest the FBI on site, like if an FBI guy is going

around, we should treat them like they're just a regular guy doing that shit and arrest them immediately. And then of course, the news was, of course, the news was treating him unfairly because you know, they're spokesperson for because they need like, they need the 80s hierarchy of danger, selling danger to their audience so that they can then sell hero cop stories to them. So the, I think I have it somewhere. The first thing the guy says, the CNN guy says to the AG is, well, we got to have the FBI. You know, there's FBI agents. They're out there stopping bank robbers

uh... and my first thought is i don't give a fucking somebody's robbing a bank like what do you the banks the banks have been fucking made dry everybody's right for a hundred years what the fuck out of a statement is that what we gotta have the fb i's got to be out there stopping bank robberess like what what what is that you go to?

That's the first thing in your list of priorities of evil things that have to be stopped. Bankrober's we have stopped Bankrober's like, no, fuck the banks. I think the mean Bankrober is $8,400 or something like that. Like when you, because here's if people people, like everybody thinks bankrupt, or not everybody, but a lot of people think bankrupt and they go to the movie. Oh, well, we're hitting the vault when they've gotten some special shipment of diamonds and hookers put in it that'll only be there for eight hours of pension fund. We're robbing everybody's pension fund.

Like, no, no, it's, it's some guy in a hoodie, probably a homeless guy who walks up and he's got a gun that he stole off of some overdose to homeless guy in his sweatshirt. And he hands a note to the banker that says empty the drawer into the bag and no one dies. And then they put the money into a bag because they're instructed. They have two separate drawers, one that requires special authorization. The top one has less than 10 grand in it. And they put that. Sounds like a bank robber right now. I worked at Wells Fargo. I worked at local banks. I was in banking for years. And this is how this is how the banks mitigate it. They have

a separate cash for cash area for most of the stuff. But the average bank robber just comes in. They may not have a gun. They may have a gun or they threaten to have a bomb. And you just give them the money. And they have a stack of 20s in there with serial numbers recorded. And once those get spent, they can track where the money went and go pick the guy up a week later. Yeah. It's literally a very dangerous criminal going around. The guy, me and a bank has a lot in common, right? Yeah.

I'm sure I'm next on their list. And the best part is the bank makes that $8,400 in overdraft fees to poor black people within the next 30 seconds of its existence. Don't worry, don't worry, the welfare queens are funding because this is the dirty secret of how banking works when you get social security direct deposits. Because those things come in on the third of the month, like clockwork. So what the banks will do, I watched this, I had to participate in it and I forgave a whole shitload of fees to try and stop it.

But then I got in trouble is it will let those $33 overdraft charges on the eight different purchases at the same fucking gas station rack up. And then when that, when that next social security check comes in, bank takes all the money and that person's left with 86 bucks. Really? They don't care. Yeah. Why would they ever stop it? They just, so that, that $600 check becomes less than $100 that the person will then live

on for a month because they had the audacity to buy an Arizona iced tea and then to go to somewhere else and buy a pack of skittles and then go somewhere else and each one of those 30 bucks, 30 bucks, 30 bucks, fuck the banks. I couldn't believe when I couldn't believe what I heard it. We got all these bank robbers out there. What? What do you, yeah, you couldn't say a pedophiles because those are your buddies because you know they're not going after them.

Let's see. Americans living paycheck to 64% of Americans living paycheck to paycheck. Wow. Oh, it could be worse, I guess. 36% of Americans earning 200,000 or more living paycheck to paycheck. I mean, that doesn't surprise me. Like, especially if you're earning $200,000 or more, credit is cheap still. It's very, very cheap.

So why, like an investment returns aren't, sorry, stable investment returns aren't great. You can play the market and do pretty well, right? But when you're at that 200 gram range, it's better to just invest in your own property by a house, pay off a mortgage, but that's gonna eat up your paycheck. Yeah.

But who cares? At the end of the day, if you're at that level and you lose something, so you sell your house or you four clothes on it until you get another job, the social security safety net is pretty fucking high in the United States. Like, we don't actually see people starving and dying in the streets. So I would live paycheck to paycheck too. Fuck, fuck, fuck. What, save?

Why? Why? The government's gonna destroy your savings with inflation in the next six months. Yeah, the, or the IRS is gonna come take it. Legally, what can I do? What can I do to booby trap my home against the IRS is new 90,000 armed agents that are coming

for. Oh, did you not see the FACC at sea? You did not see the fact check? No. On that? What was it? They said the fact check where they said, I mean, this does give them enough money to hire 90,000 agents, but I mean, are they gonna? and agents, but I mean, are they gonna though? That was the fact check. Are they really? Yeah. The fact check comes down to that the IRS is understaffed. So that makes it false for some reason. I mean, I guess. And then the other thing is like, well, it'll only be a net increase of like 30,000 or 40,000 agents because they got to replace the turnover. It's like, well, it'll only be a net increase of like 30,000 or 40,000 agents because they got to replace the turnover. It's like, but they're still gonna hire 90,000 agents, like, so it's still true.

I cannot, I cannot believe that. Yeah, I can't believe the liberals defending that one. Like, they go after, they're going after poor people that why do you think they have the guns? This like all they do, every dollar that gets pumped into their system, they use to send, they're targeting the same people that will write a check when Comcast send them, like when the RIA, sends them a letter saying you're guilty of, your, your kids guilty of downloading an MP3, send us a1,000 or we'll sue you.

Like that is the, that's the target, that's the target demo for the IRS. It's not, you know, it's not rich guys who are going to, who are going to fight, who are going to spend $10,000, fighting a $1,000 bill from the government. No. It's just crazy watching them defend it. Did you see that fucking cuck journalist? I can't remember his name talking about how, why are people even afraid of audits? I mean, just don't cheat on your taxes. It's like, oh, is that the answer?

Is that what you just, oh, shit. Well, shit, yeah, most tax cheats actually aren't trying to cheat. They're trying to legally limit their amount of tax exposure. And then the government just decides that one word in the 85,000 page tax code means something different than every lawyer thought it meant. Yeah. And then they just fuck you. And even if you win, you lose thousands and thousands of dollars in hours of time.

I got paper audited a couple of years ago, because this was, it was an audit from before I started my YouTube channel. I had all of my law firm income, right? And I put it down there and I provided all of the bank statements that showed all of the money that I made, which was not much, this is early on in my career.

And I sent it to the government and they sent me an audit and they said, actually we determined that you didn't make any money. Oh, that none of this is business income, which was actually a problem because I have a lot of kids and that meant my earned income credit was taken away. So I didn't make any money and suddenly I owed the IRS $10,000 for not making money. And I was like, but I did make the money. And the amount of fucking time it took to get that resolved. And it just hung like I would have to gather, I had to print out everything in detail.

Highlight it all. Do all the calculations. Show them that the exact dollar amount was tracked in my bank account. And then send that all to them and then just wait for months and months and months for them to eventually say, oh yeah, you were right. It's like, why would I lie about making money to you? It's not like I was claiming a shitload of deductions that were suspect. It was literally just my income. They're like, no, it's a disaster. And that was just a paper one,

but it took me tons of hours. I could have hired an accountant or an attorney to take care of it, but that would have cost a bunch of money that I didn't have. And instead, it was just my time. But my taxes were simple then. I had one income stream. Small business owners, as you probably know,

tend to have multiple and all sorts of different deductions. And the more small businesses that you end up owning, the more fucking complicated it gets and the more expensive those paper audits cost. And then if you get a real audit, we have some fucker coming in and demanding all the receipts. Oh, God. Heaven, I can't wait.

Let's see, here's something for you. This is every, every 30 minutes, oh no, okay, every hour of work at Amazon, the computer pops up a 30 second break where you have to say mindfulness mantras. Can you see this one on the screen? I'm bringing up. Yep. So this is working it. So this is working it. So this is working. They have a lot of initiatives at Amazon to try to make you kill yourself, I think.

They're running like a, they're running some kind of an experiment, like a Stanford prison experiment, but a real one, seeing what it takes to drive people insane, like a portal. Repeat these phrases during each expansion of the circle Even in chaos I can feel peaceful. I noticed the good While socially distant I am emotionally close Mind mind moment positive affirmation. So if you work at Amazon. I don't know if this is real if you work at Amazon They have you like reading, reading those mindless platitude posters that target cells

that you find in every single Airbnb painted on wood or that women write in cursive over their thought picks on Instagram. Sounds great. They had that, did you ever see their little like, they had the wellness like phone booth that you would have to go in? So I saw that. So everything that Amazon does sounds like a fucking dystopian nightmare.

Every single thing. It's like, you always, it's like, here's the next thing Amazon is doing. He's like, why are you doing this? This sounds terrible. They're like, we don't understand why our employees hate us. Yeah. Because you do this shit to them. Just let them go and be miserable at work.

Like 90% of people on earth, you go and you judge through the thing that you have to do. So you can go do the things that you like later. Like that's, we're just kind of accustomed to that sort of cycle. Let us do it instead of trying to make us like the thing that we're just kind of accustomed to that sort of cycle. Let us do it instead of trying to make us like the thing that we're guaranteed to hate. Here's a trans cheerleader is giving, given an assault citation after choking out a teammate

17 who called her a man with a penis at cheer camp. I hope she choked her out with his penis. Take that, you bitches. We're tired of getting our penises made fun of by you. Here's a picture of the, now this stood out to me. Perhaps you'll, it will stand out to you as well, Nick. This is the picture of the cheerleader,

the trans cheerleader that they, I guess pulled off of Instagram or something. I'd like you to notice the face and that it's obviously a cartoon drawn. No, that's not it. That's the real face on top of Tyrone. Nick, this was, okay, this was in the news. So this picture is a company, this article where it looks like a rather large trans woman

has the paint. It looks like those shirts they had in the 90s that the Mexican girls wore that was airbrushed like cartoon anime faces like brats stalls. Yeah. And with obviously exactly precisely perfect proportions with the nose and the eyes and the mouth. Pretty, like did they actually filter the person or they literally just photo, oh my fucking God, it's horrifying.

Sick. This is, what do you mean? This is, uh, this is just their natural face that they got. Can you believe someone would call them a man with a, with a paint every single smile, exactly the same. Oh, that's pretty good. Can it just lift itself up? Like, does it even need help from a male cheerleader? Stick its hand up its own ass and fly off the ground.

I don't know. There you go. That's a... I don't really move this one out of the way there. Yeah, anyway. So the peanut thing, I went to a lightning house this weekend. What's a lightning house? It's a cabin in the middle of nowhere. It's like an art installation. Okay. A cabin in the middle of nowhere, 400 lightning rods all around it. And it's set to be like this like a desolate and totally remote, you know, removed from anything as part of this art installation.

And hi, Pony, how you doing? Sit down, sit down, sit down. We had, first of all, we had no lightning, but even worse, it was like the cabin was so remote and spooky that the women who were with us were terrified to do anything alone because, you know, of course ghosts or whatever. Ghosts or guys are going to run like sniper guys are going to make the trek 50 miles across the plains to rape them, right? Right. Rapists have enough time to just find desolate cabins in the woods, stalk them for days in their like, one of those gilly suits or whatever. Yes.

Like pretending to be a bush, just waiting for you to go outside to the outhouse. Yeah, gangs of them. Gangs of them were doing this. So anything, anything in the cabin was, okay, you have to get up and go with me, get up and go to the bathroom. And the worst part was, in the middle of the night, I wake up to go to the bathroom

and I'm in like that stupor, that twilight of like where you can get up, go to the bathroom and then you can still come back and go back to bed. Your legs, you just keep that, like, okay, I'm just not gonna interact with anything and go back. So I get up and my girlfriend goes, uh, hey, hey, hey, are you there? She's like, well, hey, hey, hey, what are you doing? What are you doing? I'm fucking going to the bathroom, all right? So the next day, I asked, I was like, what was that? Why were you fucking bothering me so much when I got to the bathroom?

She goes, well, I wanted to see you were sitting up weird and I wanted to make sure that you weren't a demon, that no demon had like taken control of your, because when you answered the first time, you sounded kind of weird. So then I said, I thought I had to keep them talking to make sure that there's not a demon in control. I was like, yeah, well, that's like, you just like woke me up from sleep.

And then I get over that's, that's good though, because the demon had taken over until your consciousness brought you back to the front. That's what she says. Well, I respect that. And then I get to the bathroom and the other girls there, just like standing outside of the bathroom, staring into it. I'm like, what the, what the fuck are you doing here? Is she going, are you going to the bathroom? I guess I'm going, I'm guessing I'm going to the bathroom. What is wrong with you too? You need to stop watching scary, first of all,

stop watching scary movies and just take it, get everything out of your systems, put the blankets over your head until the morning. And then we didn't even see any lightning. We didn't see any lightning. Why would she stare? And though she's staring at the bathroom though, because she was scared, she was afraid to go in. She didn't want to go in. She didn't. She was waiting her.

She had to go. Yes, yeah. We didn't see any lightning, which is, you know, horseshit, which sucked, but then we had to like, we had to like play that game of, of, oh, well, you know, it was so much fun anyway and the whole experience was like, you know, so fulfilling to the person who's cabinet was.

And I just wanted to say, you know, it's fucking bullshit that we didn't see any lightning there. That's what it is. Right, you went to a, you went to a fucking cabin in the middle of nowhere with nothing to do, except watch lightning hit. And then you didn't see any lightning. We just talked about demons for all night anyway.

Nick, have you met Pony? I have not. Hi. Hi. How you doing, Pony? I'm good. How are you? Great. Sean isn't here. Yeah, we're here. Notice he's working now. All it does is work. Oh, man. I know. I'm sort of idiot. Get it. Yeah, I like some kind of idiot. Can you get into that mic? I'm going to turn you up a little bit. Let's see here. Okay, try it now. Yes, yes, hello. Yes, yes. Okay, you're back from your your showcase showdown vacation. The price is right. Yes, I was on vacation. Iran vacation. Iran? Where were you? No. No, where were you?

France, Italy, Germany. France, Italy, Germany. France, Italy, Germany. Why? Just summer. Like, why those places just for fun? Oh, we went to Central Pay for Psychology Conference, which is random. Yeah. Place for conference.

And then we went to Italy just for fun. We had a boat and we were just on water for a few days. And then I went to Germany to visit my family. I'm watching your, you know, I like to be, I like to keep tabs on what I'll ever do. Yeah. So I'm always. As I should. Yeah. So if you pop up a story, I'm like right on it right away.

And I really have this very specific feeling. Like, oh, that's so nice. I would never, even if I died like six times, I would not be, I could never have this experience there you're having on these yacht parties with all these beautiful people. What does it like to live? If I was reincarnated, even if I lived a life like Nick does, fighting the good fight, being a religious man, I would never come back quite, they would take a couple more times around. Do you know what I'm saying? Can you give us a taste of what the good life is? I mean, even when I was there, I was like, I just, you know, wow, like I'm here, I'm so grateful,

and like I feel so lucky that I'm here, because, you know, wow, like I'm here. I'm so grateful and like I feel so lucky that I'm here because, you know, it's crazy. Yeah. It's never a moment when you're like an experienced like then, you're like, yeah, like this is so normal and just like, you know, at least for me, it's not, you know? See, but I look at you in these pictures, what is your Instagram, by the way? So people can look you up.

Pony is just my name. Just your name, Pony. And I. I look at you on the yacht and I think, yeah, that's, that's, that seems right. Like that is the correct person to be on a yacht. And then I think if I were on the yacht, it would be like when Elon Musk, did you see that? It was just so real. And it was like, that's disgusting. And I'm not supposed to, you don't belong there.

He's just, yeah, he just looks like he hasn't seen any sunlight in ages. In ever. Like he shouldn't have his shirt off at all. Like, yeah, that's his rightful place. He deserves that. I feel personally attacked. I love you. You know, no one has a stain.

There's no spilling anywhere. Like no one has a beer in there's no spilling anywhere. Like no one has a beer in their hand in these pictures. I'm arguing about demons in a cabin and like starting my trip with putting, trying to smuggle acid on altoids and food coloring and getting it all over my hands because I fucked it up. Like that's my trip. Yeah, I wish you were there. No, no, no, no, you would be. I think that would have been amazing. Do people get drunk on your trips?

Like, does that something that happens or someone gets very drunk and then throws up outside? No, we don't drink and we wake up and we worship God. And then we study the Bible and then we go to bed. We don't drink on these trips. Are you kidding me? They don't serve alcohol. I can't tell if you're messing with me.

I've never been on a boat that doesn't serve alcohol. I thought that was a point of boats. If I get in a canoe, someone hands me a fucking martini. Yeah, I think at the end of the only the Italy trip, the crew told us that we had finished 32 bottles of tequila. Okay. So I hope that answers your question. Yeah, that makes me feel a little better about it.

I'm just trying to find a way where I could imagine being on those. It was easier when I was young, right? Because I would think, well, maybe one day I'll win the lottery and then I could go be on these fancy yacht parties with beautiful people. But now, that's not fucking happening. I mean, I'm sure you can be on a smaller size boat and have the same experience.

No. Would you get on a smaller, if I said, hey, I'm having like a smaller size boat party at like like Castaic. Yeah. Do you and all your friends want to come? Yeah. My friends might not be down, but I'd be down. Oh, you would be down. It's even better. Yeah, give me a minute. I've got a lot of problems. I'll have a good time. I could do that. You're a dinghy. It's some alcohol. It's some good people. What a coincidence. My dinghy always comes with alcohol. Okay, would you like to start reading us some news? Yeah, I love how it just starts with Iranian.

Oh, did Riley put the Iranian one up to put a subtle guy here is that's fantastic. Nevada police alleged woman's tab date and revenge for 2020 killing of Iranian general. I know exactly which generally, you know, which, which, quote, incident this is talking about, right? No, tell me. So, okay. Do you know? No fucking idea. No idea. You know, he's a very famous lawyer. Oh, yeah. Cool. That's why I'm wearing a suit.

I practice internet law. Oh. He practices fat jokes on the internet. He's very good at it. And drinking whiskey and making fan jokes. That's why he has the biggest law, the biggest show on you. Do you still have the biggest show on the biggest late night live show on YouTube? Every night. It's probably, I don't, I haven't done it in a month, so I don't know, but we'll have to see tomorrow when I start back up.

He used to. Anyway, I want to go anyway. Keep, please keep going. Anika Nikubin, 21, has been charged with attempted murder, battery with a deadly weapon, and burglary, burglary. Nikubin and the man met online on a dating website. Then while in the room, the pair began having sex when Nikubin put a blindfold on the man according to the police report. Nikubin then turned off the lights

and several minutes later, the man felt a pain on the side of his neck Class reported Nikubin allegedly stabbed a man in the neck for revenge against US troops for the killing of Gossam Soleimani in 2020 Police wrote in a report after disturbing the man pushed Nikubin away and ran out of the room to call 911 Nikubin also ran out of the room, telling a hotel employee that she had just dapped a man. When talking to police, Nikubin told an investigator she wanted revenge. Police said, I remember I saw this piece of news and I was just hoping that not that many

people see it because it's so embarrassing. For who? Because, well, I mean, just like for people of any country, when someone just like from your country is so dumb, that they just do such thing, because this guy had nothing to do. I don't know what he's talking about from America. We don't have any. We don't have any dumb people. Because the guy that got stabbed, he had nothing to do, like he did, it doesn't work for the

government. Wait, so he didn't organize the killing of the general? No, he had nothing to do like he did it doesn't work for the government. Wait, so he didn't organize the killing of the general? No, he had nothing to do with it, but he was just an American man. And this Iranian woman thought I'm going to get my revenge on an American on America just by doing this to an American person. Like, okay, do they not allow women to get educated in Iran yet? But actually, most people that are in the universities are women now. Oh, that's a big problem.

Yeah. Right there. And they're all about that smart. Yeah. Angry. They're getting good, they're getting good educations on how to be angry at university. Yeah. Crazy people everywhere.

So she just flipped out and stabbed a guy because he was American. I think so, but the thing is that guy that, that like we kill, costs him so much money. Like most people in Iran were like, I mean, I don't want to speak on behalf of most people. But we were happy because he was like a piece of shit. Yeah. Yeah.

I feel like any general of this taken out. I'm like, yeah, fuck that guy. Like that guy. That's like trading upon for a rook though. Like that, I'm okay with this. Like, you can get killed. Yeah, some chicken stab a random asshole. Like that's fine.

I think that's a fair trade. That's kind of what you give for getting blindfold. You said you got blindfolded. Yeah, which is very, what was that movie? Basic anything. You shaved the gray. Oh, that was the shades of gray. I don't think Michael Douglas got blindfolded and did he basically did? No, but he was, he was ice picked. Right, but he was handcuffed. Oh, my God. I don't remember what I was doing. I don't remember what I was doing.

I would never do that. Would you ever let a guy handcuff you? Yeah. You would? Yeah, because then I just get to be lazy. But would you let me tell you? I don't know. I can't do anything.

You could do whatever you wanted. You don't need to excuse to be like, but would you respect a guy who let you handcuff him? Oh yeah. Oh really? Yeah. I don't think I have. I don't think I've ever trusted anyone enough to handcuff me.

Oh, because I'm sure. Well, actually, I do trust them. I know that I've fucked them over enough to get stabbed. That would not, I wouldn't be able to get that out of my head if I got handcuffed in bed. With enough alcohol, I believe that there's everything I can convince people to do. You, you could, yes.

Let me, I've never trusted anyone I've dated enough to handcuff me. That's that. What did you do to them that you were so worried that this is gonna be the moment they're gonna stick revenge? I'm just running my mouth. The wrong look, I think, would set them off.

Yeah. It's like, I'm just going to kill this guy. Fuck him. We have the same alcohol math equation as you, but the variables for us just tend to put the other person at deceased before the same things happen. Yeah, it's a risk. You never know. Do you like that kind of hand-cuffing, suffocating?

I mean, not like every day, but I spice it up. Spice it up. It's crazy. Okay. Every now and then, if it's like a holiday. A holiday? Which one? All of it.

Christmas. Every holiday. What about all those hallworms, day? All of them. What do you those hallmarked holidays? All of them. What do you think is the one that's tank top? Look at that thing. I don't mind it.

You don't mind it? It matches his eyes. Yeah, all of our colors are actually very Christmasy right now. Oh yeah, right. Okay, what's the next one? Rosita gets canceled. It's a terrible handcuff. It's's the next one? Rosita gets canceled. A terrible handcuff. Thoughts out of my. Rosita gets canceled. Sesame place removes all traces of character from Park after Black family launched 25 million lawsuit claiming racist mascot ignored

their kids. Some of those stories had a few items of Rosita merchandise, but she did not have her own section in any of the shops. We spoke to the family and extended our apologies and invited them back for a special meet and greet opportunity with our characters. The park said the actor, poor train Rosita, who was not named, did not intentionally ignore the girls and is devastated about the misunderstanding. The statement alleged Rosita was just during no to another guest who had requested. They hold their child for a photo, which is not permitted. Yeah. Be Iverile Mar. I hope I'm saying.

I love this guy. I love be Iverile Mar. Sorry. He and I have a special thing. Oh, yeah, because he's not turning. The attorney for the family. Oh, do you really love that guy? Do you know him? Oh, he's, he's fucking hilarious. That guy's great. He did, he did, he did, no, he's great. He's wonderful. Oh, he is. So he, he defended this guy named Theodore Edgecombe, who, who shot another attorney. So I was on Theodore Edgecombe side. Because like if you kill an attorney, I am 100% on your side. Of course it's garbage.

So he shoots this attorney and his defense, his opening statement was literally stolen from Johnny Cochran defending OJ. He copied the word for word. It was beautiful. It was just, it was like, why wouldn't you just write one generic opening statement as a lawyer that you say it in every case? Yeah, but he just don't think you're going to get caught.

But it's like if Johnny Cochrane had Down syndrome and said it at the same time, it was, it was fucking terrible. It was so bad. I love this guy. He's trying to be like the Ben Crump guy, like the every race crime he tries to be in there and just steal. Again, remember that these attorneys are stealing black families who are experiencing losses money by millions of dollars. That's their job is to take millions of dollars from black family members who have lost someone They're hilarious. So this is this is a Muppet that snubbed a little black girl and now the Muppet got canceled Oh, yeah, that's that's what's happening here Polly so be ever Lamar the attorney for the family who have launched a 25 million loss it against the Philadelphia base theme

the attorney for the family who have launched a 25 million lawsuit against the Philadelphia based theme park previously rejected the firm's explanation. Lamar noted he has received evidence from 25 to 30 other black families of similar incidents at the Sesame Street based theme park over the years. The family is also said to be looking to get the two girls therapy to help them cope with the appearance now. Yeah, George Floyd, $25 million of therapy. It's a lot of therapy. Yeah, it's... I hope she wins, though.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, she just sucks. So yeah, they should definitely win. I'm on BI every side on this one. That's what Sesame Street gets for trying to, you know, educate inner city kids. Now that this is what they've brought it on themselves for, for they open the door for this. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah, you never educate inner city kids. It's a terrible plan. Um, okay. What's, uh, what never educate inner city kids. It's a terrible plan.

Okay. What's, uh, what's next, Fawni? Taliban mark year in power that has given Afghanistan security, but little hope. The Taliban and their supporters waved the group's black and white flag on the streets of Afghanistan on Monday to celebrate a year since they marched into the capital and Took power after a stunning series of battlefield victories in the 12 months since the United States chaotic withdrawal Some Afghans have welcomed improved security, but struggled with poverty drought Malnutrition and the fading hope among women that they will have a decisive role in the country's future and the fading hope among women that they will have a decisive role in the country's future. Some men fired into the air in Kabul and a few hundred people, including supporters,

fighters, and officials gathered at the square in front of the US Embassy to mark the day. They held banners including the slogan, Death to the United States. They always have to put that stuff in at the end and make the Taliban look bad, don't they? They always death to the United States, but you know, they can't possibly mean everybody, right? Why would you tell me? Why would you tell me?

No, they don't need me. They don't need me. They don't need me. They don't need me. They don't need me. They don't need me. They don't need me. They don't need me. Terabindy mad anymore like we left and we left him a bunch of cool stuff. Yeah, we did uh, terrible. They always put that really annoys me the death to America bit. Like come on, they don't lie it anymore. Yeah, me either. That's like saying death to Santa Claus. Like they brought, we brought McDonald's and then we left tanks that they

get to go like drive around with in the desert and it's fucking cool. And they're like, oh, yeah, death to that guy. No way. Not a chance. Are they mad? I'd like them to list it out. Like go and order in America. Like make the list, the Taliban, make a list of like, explain more. You have to use your more of your words. Yeah, like talk to me. Communicate effectively. You have to explain to people, like not everybody knows exactly what you mean.

When you say death to America. Yeah, like do you mean the people? Or do you mean like the real thing? The IRS, probably. You can have a more effective messaging, I think. I've always thought that though. Or less specific Americans. We know who the one I ran in chick was mad at, right?

Yes. Who are these guys mad at? What random person are they trying to sleep with and then stab in the neck? Yeah, exactly. How are you on the Taliban? Not a fan. You're not a fan. Okay.

Not death. I can't imagine somebody that would be a fan, but I mean, have you tried? Have you seen them with the swan boats, though, when they had ice cream and stuff? No. You haven't seen the Taliban on the swan boats? Hold on. Let me, let me see if this changes your mind. Hold on.

Taliban goes to the lake. Taliban goes to the lake. You know what? I have a Taliban goes to the lake. Taliban goes to the lake. You know what, I have a... Taliban goes to the lake. I just remembered, I have, hold on. I have text messages from Chris the QE too. Yeah, Taliban fighters, seen in petal boats on Afghanistan lake.

Look at these guys. How could you not like these guys? Oh my god. And can you see in this? No. That's a rifle. Yeah, it's a rifle. That's cool.

Well, you can't go boating without your rifle. I learned that in Arkansas. This would be great if they didn't bring their guns and stuff. And where is this? And what does it say? Talibanistan. Yeah, Bandi, Amir, National Park in Bamiin province. Do you know where that is?

No. What do you mean? No. Because you're doing all this traveling and stuff and you're so well read. And culture. We found out that you like boats. If I asked you to go to this lake

in one of those boats, would that be? There's the killing too. There's the Kila and they won't kill me I'll take their brains I want you to ask the tailman They're very demanding on me. I want to see what they're about talk to him a little bit They're about death to America didn't you know? Yeah, okay. I'm gonna ask why wait a minute Let me get this one. Taliban ice cream. Yeah. Look at this.

See? Look at that guy's face. Yeah. Just some dudes. Like why don't they look happy? How do you have ice cream in your hand? You don't have a smile on your face. Maybe they got those cold headings.

Like I smiling look. He's in the back, he's smiling. Just hit it and all that beard. They probably shot him afterwards. He's smiling like that. Okay, I gotta He's in the back, he's smiling. He's in the back, he's smiling. He's in the back, he's smiling. He's in the back, he's smiling. He's in the back, he's smiling. They hit it and all that beard. They've probably shot him afterwards, he's smiling like that.

Okay, I gotta read you these Christic Huey texts too. How much therapy do you think they are gonna need? No one needs therapy. So, racket. Therapy is a rich man's game. Oh God. Tell me what's wrong with your life. Fucking everything.

What else could there, you know? Oh God. Tell me what's wrong with your life, fucking everything. What else could there, you know? Yeah, like let's talk about it. Which part do you want to talk about? Yeah, which whatever part you want to talk about. I mean, IRS is a problem. Okay. Taxes are a big problem.

People around me are a big problem to people around me are a big problem all of them Cut them out of your life Get okay with giving back to society And what else give societies my from the big problem though. I don't want to I want more to take more Yes, I'm owed a considerable amount by society. Do you know what this man gives to society? Yeah. In advance, he doesn't have to pay in a year. That's crazy.

Obviously. Yes. I've been giving you a definitively as well. Well, it's a good thing you're only living in Germany because those fuckers pay almost 50% like 48% but they're very happy with that. They're very happy. Do they seem like a happy people? Jeremy, very happy with paying that amount of cash and getting free health care and free education.

I was just there and I was talking to my cousins and I was like, yeah, I mean, we just... But if cousins, they paid for it. Yeah, how's that free? Well, someone else paid for it. Right, and I'm like, but then like, what if you don't want to go to school and you're perfectly healthy, but you're still paying for it?

Yeah. And he was like, but at one point if something was to happen, then I wouldn't pay out of pocket. I was like, how old is he? But if something doesn't happen, then he paid out of pocket his entire life for that. I was having that debate with him, but you know, I it's like that scene in it. I didn't want to force my American shit down his throat.

So I was like, okay, I see your point. I was going to say that you bastard. Nobody's like that that scene in it. Eocrity. Have you seen that movie? No. Oh, well, there's a prostitute and she gets launched into the future where everybody's stupid. And a great explanation of that movie. And she's a guy comes up to her because he knows that she's a prostitute because she's a woman

in the future and that is automatically the assumption. And so he's like, hey, girl, how much to get with you? And she's like, she charges him like $1,000, but she says tomorrow. And he's like, oh, girl, yeah, I can wait till tomorrow. And she's like, well, can you wait till Thursday? It'll be 1,500. If you wait till Thursday, he's like, oh, yeah, girl, I can wait so good.

It keeps coughing up the money. That's German healthcare. I've just explained it perfectly through idiocracy. Like, you're just waiting around paying more and more money until nothing happens. Like what if he dies in a car accident? What a waste of all of the taxes he ever paid. It's not better for like an individual on an individual scale,

but it is better collectively. Yeah, that's the worst thing. America's very innovative. That there could ever possibly be. Okay. What is the, do you want, wait, let me read these, let me read these escort text first.

You don't know who, Chris, the Kiwi is, do you? Okay, he's a special individual, who lives in, like a special or he's special. No, he has a unique perspective on life. He's hard to explain. Okay. He harasses prostitutes. He's on

like a list. I think they're not harassed enough in life. They've got a blacklist, like a prostitute blacklist. Okay. He has like a giant thread on. I can't get on it because I'm not a prostitute. They screen you. But the prostitutes, we found out have a site where they talk about him. Yeah. And then list like stuff that he's done. I don't think he's legally allowed. He's in a country where prostitution is legal. Yeah. Whereas Australia.

Australia, yeah. I thought in New York it is now. I didn't. I think it's too much. I think it's too much. I think it's too much. I thought that's somewhere like a year ago. But I think it's too much. It's too much. It's too much. It's too much. I think it's that somewhere like a year ago But it's a criminalized somewhere reputable really? Yeah, I shared it on my story

No, I think it's decriminalized so they don't right like there's still laws against it But they're like kind of like well, but I mean because you don't want to punish the hooker, right? Like that's always confused me like why are you punished? It's just really one of those things. Like, I don't understand why it's illegal. Like, if you want something and someone's willing to give it to you, I don't see where their crime is. No, I'm with you 100%. You want it? She's giving it to happy, happy win win. Let's go our merry way. Yeah. Or he or he, we got gotta be, this is, we gotta be conscious in 2022.

It could be a he giving it to you. I think women are jealous. Maybe. They want that money. Yeah. They want the ring. They can't just have you spreading your seat all over town for 20 bucks or 50 bucks or whatever it is.

You think women would pay to have sex with men? No, they would pay to not have sex with them. I think. That's what the... We'll pay if you guys will just leave us alone. They would have tossed a German taxation system to stay away from men forever. I think they just don't want to compete. Goddammit, he left a prostitute's phone number

on this shit again. Oh, no. Uh, okay. All right, let's see what it says. All right, let me... maybe I have to bring these. Brisbane. Open in another tab or something so I can get there. Okay.

Oh yeah, I'll read them. Chris the Kiwi says, nice profile, Carly. I'm in East Brisbane. Chris. And she says congrats. Question mark. I'm like Like okay. See the text messages are fun too because he'll go from hello, I love you to kill yourself.

I want to chop your tits off in like seconds if he doesn't get a response. She says congrats, question mark. And he says heart emoji, dork lol. She says, if you're inquiring to make a booking, please reply with what service you would like, including duration and time date. This is my business. I'm not here to banter. Ooh, I like it. So the point. It's been minutes of anal. How much is that? of anal, how much is that? Okay, he says, okay, point taken. If I do become your client and fall in love with you,

what would you do? Pretty good. I can use with the banter. It's a pretty, by the way, he was forbidden for using the internet for making criminal threats because he made so many threats to so many different people from high school that they banned him from the internet. He ignored it.

He still doesn't. What would you do? Stop seeing you. She says, that's harsh. He says, you're joking, right? I'll say it again. This is my work and my business. If you can't respect my professional boundaries, nor control your own feelings.

See, when women do this, I don't know how you feel about this, but whenever I see women doing this, I'm like, you're making a big fucking mistake, trying to talk sense into this guy with these gigantic paragraphs. Yeah. It's literally dangerous for me to see you. I don't want some obsessed boy

following stocking or abusing me or my family because his little ego is hurt. You seem to have a fundamental misunderstanding of what sex work is, and I suggest you adjust that before indulging in the industry. I don't know. I disagree. I think I would appreciate that she's setting clear boundaries. She's not beating around the bush. She's not leading you on. She's letting you know exactly how it is. Now, she's made a critical miscalculation here. She has not realized that when Christi Kiwi says that if I fall in love with you, the default assumption of Christi Kiwi is that she has obviously fallen in love with him first. That's true. So she, she right now is turning down his acceptance of her love. Yeah. Okay. He says, well, I disagree. If that's okay for me to do so, social workers can fall

in love with their clients. And it does happen, even though it may be rare. Seriously, Chris, get a new hobby. I've got plenty. And it bends there. Yeah. And then he says, then why do you, she says, well, then why do you message crap like this to multiple sex workers and have continued to do so for over a year? Sounds like a sad and lonely hobby to me made in the block bin. Oh. Good. Not his, not his finest.

Yeah. It's not lonely because there's always another hooker. He sent this to a lady. I think you're, this is, he sends this to me. This is a text message to a girl whose brother committed suicide, Loll. He says, I think your brother is better off in heaven. If I was him, I would have done the same thing too.

Oh, oh,, you shit. This is how we got. That's how we get out of hand. Oh no. Yeah. Take his phone away. That's fucked up. Uh, that's fucked. That's so fucked. There he is. Yeah, he looks like a heaven guy. That's

like she was like that. Oh, I'm going to have to handle devil. He's a good looking guy. He's 40, Sam, 10, and he'd look. Is he single? I think he is currently. I would not be saying it. Okay, please, please continue. I stopped you. Sorry. I just had to share before I forget. So he needs therapy. I know.

Everybody's not going to work on that. I know. No way. You would immediately fall in love with his therapist. Go away. He is in therapy. He stopped calling into the show because his therapist bamboozled him into thinking that calling into my show was unhealthy for him.

Cause we would try to fish him with with gender-slot pictures of himself. And I pretended to be a girl's dad that he had to ask for permission to date to eat it. Oh, I think more fuel to it. This goddamn therapist fucking brainwash it and thinking that this show is an unhealthy influence on his life and on his mental well-being. Well, he's an unhealthy influence and other people. Yeah, so you have to fight fire with fire. So you won't call in anymore. Maybe he'll call in well, okay, anyway, please keep going.

PhD student publishes research paper telling how he masturbated for three months over extreme Japanese comics featuring young boys. Okay. The University of Manchester. It was great until the end. The University of Manchester said they had received significant complaints that they were taking very seriously and confirmed they were concluding or rather conducting a detailed investigation into the individual's work. Visual anthropologist Carl claims after conducting interviews and carrying out surveys. His research hit a wall and he decided to copy his participants by only masturbating to shota, shota comics and nodding down his thoughts and feelings. He says he did this for three months and also had a ban on any other type of porn, sex, or any other sexual relief. In this research. In this research note. Do you think that guy needs therapy too?

Yeah. Yeah. That guy is therapy. Yeah. No, he therapyed himself. He's like, nope. Here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to only look at little or while young, young men to maybe older teenage boys, anime porn. That's all I'm going to do. I'm he's he was doing a cleanse, right? Like that. Yeah. Yeah. When you get rid of it. Yeah, he's probably doing the right thing. Okay. Yeah, whatever works for you as long as you don't hurt anyone. Right. How can you hurt a comic book here? Yeah, if you're just sitting in the privacy of your house. Yeah. Right. I'm curious about the several complaints. Do you want to be

as sick as you want? What are the several complaints doing? Like how did that, how does it occur? Well, because he published. Oh, he published his masterbook. So it's not so private anymore. No, he publishes a research paper telling how he masturbated. Oh, wow. So he's, you know,

Wait, so he didn't even put it up on only fans That's a missed opportunity for that guy In this research note I will recount how I set up an experimental method of masturbating to Shota comics and how this Participant observation of my own desire not only gave me a more embodied understanding of the topic for my research But also made me think about loneliness and ways to combat it as driving forces of the culture of self-published erotic comics. How claimed that when surveying and interviewing participants about their relation to Shota comics,

what kind of Shota they like, how they see themselves in relation to the story, what Shota gives them and so on. He realized that almost all of them said they'd masturbated to it. He says when he tries to question participants about it, however, the conversation would stall and he eventually hit a wall. They got uncomfortable. So he's asking people about. Yeah. So how much? How many how many show to comics have you partaken in reading in your life? None. None? Not even by accident? No. Like zero. Yeah. You've never picked up a comic and been like,

oh, here's a here's a naked drawn eight-year-old. I'm gonna read further. That's never happened to you. No. I've never seen it. If I saw it, I probably would think that. You'd think what? You would keep reading it. I'm gonna read to what this is about.

Oh. Oh. Okay. I'm curious. I'm curious. I'm curious person. I wanna know. Is there like a thing?

I would look that mean. I guess you could just say any more. I'm curious. I'm curious. I'm curious person. I wanna know. Is there like a thing? I wanna know, I wanna look that, that means. I guess you could just say anything when you're that hot. That is. You know what? I hope you could just say that. I have to apologize for the crudeness of the question.

Look, somebody thought this is a good idea. So I wanna be an artist. You is a good idea. So I want to do your artisans. You're an artisader. Yeah, I just want to know, you know. Okay, but I have a follow up question. Please, please accept my humble apology for the crudeness, but in the context of the story, so is there a page countdown to show to masturbation for you? Like how many pages of this particular type of image

range? I'm not saying I'm necessarily going to be into it. Oh, OK. Right. Right. I'm not saying that I don't want to like arouse me. I'm going to say, yeah, I'm going to say, yeah, I'm just going to say if I see something like that, I'm going to go, hmm,

let me see what this is. But OK, not. I have to lightly press. Look, I'm a lawyer. if I see something like that, I'm gonna go, hmm, let me see what this is about. But, okay, not, I have to lightly press, look, I'm a lawyer, I have to do this. I don't like to as very uncomfortable for me. But this guy didn't indicate that he was previously into show to pornography. He just decided, you know what? Other people are, so now I have to go on this journey.

Sure. Yeah. For science. Yeah. Yeah, what's wrong with that? So is there a scientific number for you? Like, I mean, what, what would it take? Like what would you do?

Did he, did he go on to molesting kids? No, I don't think so. Right? Because that would be different from the art of the story. I think, yeah, that would be the line of that story. I don't see, I genuinely don't see where the problem is. He was aroused by it. He realized other people were and I'm sure comes from, he's a PhD student. So he's naturally, so he's naturally curious.

And then he was like, let me go and see what other sick fucks are about. And then he hit a wall because those other sick fucks had that boundary where they were, you know, not willing to share more information. And that's where his research stopped. That's science. So then he just started class excising himself to jerk off to different stuff. It didn't say he was forcing.

Did it say it was forcing? Maybe it did. Well, I got that impression. Maybe I inferred that. I don't know if you can, sorry, if I do that. I'm sorry, if I do that. How do you, if you're not into it, how do you force yourself? I mean, you just gotta keep trying, I guess.

Right? Let me ask you guys, if you're not into something, can you still, like, get an erection? Yeah. Let's try. Where's the show to stuff? Yeah, you can think about, you know, you can think about

other stuff. You can like tie rubber bands around the base of your, you can do a lot of stuff. It's classical conditioning, right? So you would, you would think, anything else while observing the thing that you're not into until your brain creates the Pavlovian response. Yeah. Yeah response of being into it, I guess. Like, that's what you'd have to do. Can you do that? I did that with peach cobbler or whatever. I know women can talk themselves into being turned off by you,

because that happens to me all the time. I feel like guys just do that on their own. So many times. How do guys do that? Do you think what's the biggest thing that they do to talk them sounds out of getting laid? This hasn't happened to me yet. But like just being on TikTok recently, this is like the most recent phenomenon.

I guess I guess familiar with Andrew Tate. Yeah, he's called in to the show. We really did. Oh, you're kidding. Are you kidding? Really? You talked to him. You're a lot of tips, actually.

So I was probably one of the best interviews. Can I be here? Can I spend my hours on them? Oh, you want to talk to him too? Yeah. Okay. I like it. Do you like him?

Are you a fan of him? I'm not a fan. Of his? No. He said he was shorter than me. But I don't, he sounds like a fan. In every way, he said, he added that. He said, make sure if any girls are into me, tell them that I'm short.

Anyway, what were you saying? I wasn't. I was listening. What's happening on TikTok? Like a lot of women are turned off if you are a fan of Andrew Tate. I wouldn't be turned off, but I would just want to talk to you. I wouldn't just immediately be immediately now,

but I would just want to see what's going on in your mind. Like forgive me, I just googled and I have no fucking idea who this guy is. So what about Andrew? No, I've like TikTok is anathema to my entire existence. All of the stuff that I do is like nine hours long. So TikTok is way too short for me. Yeah, it is a hole. It is a dark, dark hole. It'll suck you in. But it's very fun. It's a fun hole. I like dark, dark fun holes. But tell me about like what about Andrew Tate is so terrible, like what, because I have no idea. So what is it? So I mean, I don't

follow him. I've watched like a few of his, and like on a lot of his things, I would agree with him. Like a lot of the things that he says are very logical, but then he doesn't know where to draw that line, you know? He just kind of like doesn't have any boundaries and it's just very, you know, the misogyny is baffling. Like, you know, he-

What do you mean by baffling? He's like, yeah, yeah, so- Like, I just, okay, here's a turn off. A guy that calls himself an alpha male. Oh. Yeah, that's weird. I'm with you on that. That's strange.

What should he call himself? What about a guy that calls himself a beta male? Just don't. Just don't call yourself anything. Just show that you're an alpha male. You don't, if you're an alpha male, I don't think that has ever been an alpha male that has called himself an alpha male. If you're an alpha male, you just are. And people will know that you are. You don't need to advertise or

you don't need to say it. If you need to say it, you're probably not. Could you get your friend to say it about you? He's like, hey, make sure when Pony gets here, you say like, oh, that guy takes like a real alpha male. Yeah. Doesn't really do it for me. I'm like, I'm just gonna like laugh like, okay. Cool. Okay, so you don't like that.

Do you think that women like get annoyed but they're also kind of turned on by him? Like, they're fascinated by him and just want to dissect him? No. And they're obsessed with him. I know what you're talking about. There is a type of like hardcore guy that has that kind of wanna dissect him. No. I know what you're talking about. There is a type of hardcore guy that has that kind of effect on you.

Yeah. Right? He's not that guy. But for most women, don't you think maybe? As women, he just pisses you off. And that's bad. Yeah, not in a Q way. He just makes you really upset and sad and angry. He just makes you think like,

I feel like he's sending us back like 50 years. Yeah, where, where's he sending you back? To the kitchen. To like, yeah, yeah, exactly. Like that's what it's like. It's wrong with the kitchen though. Like I, I, No, like metaphorically.

The kitchen I cook all the time. Yeah, metaphorically. Why do women hate it? I don't understand. It's got to be on my mind. That's like, let's like sending you to the ATM. Oh, I was on my way.

But I go to the ATM all the time. He's got like seven kids. He's got, Yeah, he is an ATM. He's probably has a shirt that says human ATM on it that someone got him as a joke. I was just at, I was just in the Caribbean for two weeks. And two weeks and there was a beach pharmacist.

And I had to keep going to the ATM all the time. It was amazing. Like because I kept needing pharmaceutical help. Yeah. And this like, I need a cat. No, what are you getting? It's a fun thing. There's a whatever you needed.

Whatever you needed. That was no wonder you had to keep going back to the ATM. Well, it was there's great stuff there. It was it was amazing. But yeah, I was there all the time. So I don't have a problem being in the kitchen or at the ATM because they're both natural

habitats for me. I'm like a predator in both of those places. Okay. I'm like making omelet and withdraw to my computer. What are you talking about? How is your predator? Is that like alpha male? Is that doing it?

I like just immediately don't argue with people. Like I will say what I think, and then they say what they think, and what I'm like, I see your point. Like if I talk to Andrew Tate, it would just be like a five minute conversation. I would be like, yeah, okay, I see your point. We're I talk to Andrew Tate, it would just be like a five minute conversation. I would be like, yeah, okay, I see your point.

We're not going to be friends, but you're saying on the record that Andrew Tate could only last five minutes with you. Is that what you just said? Like, yeah, like in talking. Oh, okay, cool. Oh, okay, got you. Okay. I forget what we were talking about. Something with it. Oh, that was, you didn't like that on Tic-Tac, that that was happening. That's just like the first thing that came to my mind has like a turn off, but I mean, like there's so many turnoffs. Like are we talking physically or personality?

Don't you think that guys kind of need like an extreme swing to the misogynist side to normalize them? Like they get so much feminine influence all day that maybe a guy like that's just kind of bringing them back to normal a little bit. Do you think that at all? I know what you're trying to say.

So. Thanks for giving me this. So. Thanks for that so much. I see your point. It's so much better when you do it. I know what you're trying to say, you're funny, and you're not saying it,

but if you could say it in a way that a person could understand I get it. Okay, here's an example. I don't know if it's gonna be a good example, but this is what comes to my mind. You know, remember when the whole Black Lives Matter thing was happening? And then there are people that were saying all lives matter and it was pissing Black people off.

Yeah. Right? Because they were saying, well. Because they were saying white people off too. Well, yeah, yeah. Like the allies, the people that like were in races. Right. White people that are in races, they were pissed off, right?

Are you saying that all lives don't matter? So, what about blue lives, Pony? See the blue lives matter? I forget what I was saying. You were saying that the pendulum swinging like another forest, bringing people back. Yeah, so what I'm trying to say is that when a minority group has been wronged for a really long time

and now finally they have a voice, right? You can't now come and be like, try to shut down that voice and be like, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's for everyone. It's equal. But it's like, no, you've been wrong this whole time. Like, we need to over-correct now with all of this

almost falling off the other side. Yeah. All of this, like, now you see, like, with, you know, bigger people are beautiful. Well, that didn't used to be a thing, but now it's so like extreme because we're over-correcting for all the time that we wronged those people. So now we have a little bit of over-correction, but now eventually, this is what I think. I think that now we have that over-correction, but hopefully it's going to balance out.

And then it's going to be. Bigger people, beautiful. Yes, but then I saw a picture of a really fat lady on the cover of like women's health. Yeah, I was like, that's too far. Women's health, it's healthy now. I was like, I was with you until now. Yeah, so you had me, but you just-

I think there's nuance there, though. I think there's nuance there, though. I think there's nuance there, because I think people who believe in themselves are beautiful, but I don't think a person who believes in themselves enough to try and convince me that they're beautiful is beautiful. I think that's, like, I think that's the over correction. It's like, look, you're happy being 300 pounds. That's fine, but please, dear Christ, don't wear a string bikini. And then try and convince me that you're attractive.

Cause, cause like, I don't want to see me in a string bikini either. Like I'm, yeah, I don't want to see you in that tank. I don't want to see me in this tank top, but I wanted to force everybody else to. Here's, here's some fat shaming. Speaking of big people, wait, let me get literally my favorite subject on earth.

Did you know we had this segment on the show called Fat Watch? No, no. Yeah, people submit, people submit articles on, on big ladies taking liberties. I hate you. on big ladies taking liberties. I hate you. One man fat shamed by cruel taxi driver as he repeatedly checks his tire pressure. Ah!

Wallace. Ah! Ah! The article says being fat shamed under any circumstances can be a seriously traumatic end-up setting. Wow, a TikToker explained she was fat-shamed in a covert way as the taxi driver kept huffing angrily while she sat awkwardly in the back of the car. UK-based Danielle Veneer took to TikTok to tell her followers one of the wildest ways she's

ever been fat-shamed, starting a threat of comments. So she was in the taxi and the whole time he was allegedly checking the tire pressure. I wonder, I wonder. I wonder if that's true at all, right? No, because when you have a massive insecurity, you just always tend to think that people are hinting at that. It's kind of like how I think,

I hope this doesn't offend anyone, but I think a lot of black people just kind of like, always wait, always wait. Everyone takes them wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait to race like they think it's racist. But it's because they've been treated wrong for so long. And now they just take everything as a sign of racism. And I feel like a lot of bigger people could take, you know, maybe he was just checking his tire pressure, but maybe she took it that way because she has that like, you know, deeply embedded like insecurity about herself. I wonder. I wonder. Was the, was the Italian black people captive that? So, what are you saying?

I'm just wondering if the Italian yacht captain of the boat you were on in Italy, was he checking the ballast levels for the fat people on the boat? Like when they would shift to the side, would he like, oh God, I got to adjust the ballast. Like was that happening? I was probably the fatest person on that yacht. Oh, that doesn't seem very... I mean, they're probably upset that you're appropriating there. I love my plus side spot.

Actually, I think it's broken with my computer. This is Olivia as you heard. This is the truly account. My plus size body earns me $120,000 a year. Yeah, girl. Yeah, fuck. Whoa. This is how you get it.

$300,000 and I want to get even bigger. Ooh. Food's here. Most exciting part of the day. 2,290 calories. That's it. I consider this not snack meal. Is this probably what some people would eat an entire day?

This chick is never marathon-created. I'm like, look, get the more. You know, last time I did something like this, they blocked my video for nudity. Oh, really? I don't know. I didn't realize that she was that. I didn't realize that she was wearing a suit. I would pay to see content of you.

Of what? Exactly what she's doing. We would that look on her face like very promiscuous. Like, hmm, cuz that promiscuous. Yeah, is that what that is? She wants to sit on your face. Oh no. Don't do it.

Don't do it. Don't do it. That's safe. 2200 calories though. That's just like a Wednesday lunch. That's not that impressive to me. It's like who's that swimmer? Michael Phelps. Michael Phelps.

She makes 120,000 a year doing that. Wow. So all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same.

It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same.

It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. It's all about the same. like a model, like a normal what you would think model, like a skinny person. And then they will have like a bigger model. Right? Do they have the skinny person stand next to the bigger person for pictures?

A lot of times we do, a lot of times we do like a campaign where we shoot together or like we wear different sizes of the clothes separately. Because before when you used to go online shopping, you would only see the skinny model modeling the clothes. But now when you scroll, there's a bigger model that's wearing, so if you're a bigger person, you can see what it would look like. But then this is something that I've been picking up on, on the set.

I get, and I have no problem with this. This is not me, like, whatever. But everybody likes these girls' assholes on set. Like, yes, queen, go queen, you're so gorgeous, killing it, this and that. And I'm just standing there like, I'm just gonna go fuck myself. Like just everyone, like, but then I realized

that this is that over correction. Yeah, exactly. To celebrate how fucking exactly. Exactly, but then I realized immediately, like, this is that over correction, like these people never were celebrated. They were never complimented. So now we have to overdo it because we realize we were doing something wrong.

I mean, I think they were kind of like, they worked, they were celebrated a lot. Like Oprah was always big and fat and out there in the 80s. Like, it's great. Let's all be big fans. She's also a celebrity. She's also an extremely, you know, wealthy person. Yeah. She's not like your normal, you know, bear lady. Getting her ass off. Okay. But like, I hate going to like Victoria's Secret now with my wife because like there's all these fat model like mannequins or whatever. And I'm like, I don't know. Have you?

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Victoria's Secret is just, it's a desolate wasteland of plastic now. Victoria's Secret seal resigned. Uh, last year because he was like, I just don't understand the new era. And yeah, he got me. Well, like, I don't know what these things will look like

that I'm supposed to buy for my wife because they're on a big thing and she's not big. So what the hell am I supposed to do? So they're also changing the whole Victoria Secret Angels. So like the best models become the Victoria Secret Angels, right? That are like, you know, the most beautiful, like in the best shape. And they are changing the whole concept. So now Victoria Secret Angels are not models.

They're really achieved women. What? Yeah. I don't want to. They're really, really achieved women. What? Yeah. I don't want to. They're really a really achieved woman. And when a lady in charge of the health and human safety, something like that, like, like, like, like, women that have contributed, you know,

like the woman of the college rapinoe, like, whatever. I don't know exactly the roles. But then I was like, I, I can see what you want to do there because like you're saying young girls look up to these models I did when I was so young like I was watching Victoria Secret runways like I memorized those But they weren't my role, but like I'm still in school, you know, like I'm getting my degree I don't think it's like it's it's not like that. It's not like yeah, I want to be beautiful, but it doesn't mean that like it's not like that. It's not like, yeah, I want to be beautiful, but it doesn't mean that. Oh, like that's all I want to be. But then also like you have to understand the place for everything. Like Victoria's secret is for this. Let's not get confused. Yeah. It's

for models. Let's bring the best models. I saw one they were putting it wasn't enough that they had fat models. They also had to have like their arms chopped off and stuff. They have like armpit hair. Yes, they did. We did that on a previous fat watch. They had really very unguilt chair model. And they drew little stink lines in to show that they hadn't showered or anything like that.

No personal hygiene at all. You can shower and not shave. True. Okay. What do you remember? I remember the last Victoria's Secret Fashion Show I watched. Katie Perry was the fattest woman on stage. Yeah. And she looked great. Yeah. She looked great. Like she was she was rocking it. She was in short shorts, she had her legs out. She was fully confident, and Katy Perry was beautiful right next to Adriana Lima and everybody else.

And it's like, okay, what was wrong with this? Yeah. Like I'm not going up and modeling for Calvin Klein. I'm just, We're all about inclusivity right now. This is the era of inclusivity. Like we excluded so many people for such long time that now, but why how do you know? What do you mean I know how do you know that they were excluded?

What you mean That guys were already the party guy. Yeah Women were everywhere The Walmart there there. Yeah, they were, they weren't every water. Because they got over there. But they were there causing problems back in the 80s and earlier as well.

I want to know where this idea that they weren't included. They weren't accepted. They were in celebrated. They didn't feel comfortable and they didn't feel like they could get in. Roseanne Bar was, yeah, Roseanne was that a shit? Is that a celebrity? Roseanne Bar? I have no Roseanne was fat as shit. Is that a celebrity?

Roseanne Bar. I have no idea who that is. Yeah, she was a, she's a comedian. Yeah. So we're talking normal people. What like there's a bunch of normal women who look like Roseanne Bar who were ruining every workplace in America. Why, why, why were they ruining?

Oh, they're just being annoying. Not because they're a fat. Like that was just normal. But like, she's a really kind of a blank demeanor. Because that sucks. Being fat must be just the suckiest thing ever. Like, I feel for those people. Like, that shit sucks.

Meekings, yeah. Right? You renounce your humanity. Like, that's just a surprise. You're just an amorphous blob that can't wash yourself or participate in human things. Like, everything's difficult to do and nobody like, fucks with you like that.

Yeah, this is making me feel better. No, people definitely fuck that one. I'm hungry. I saw that girl eat like that immediately. My stomach went, I won't back. Okay, what do you want? But did you want three double cheeseburgers, six wings, eight plates of fries?

Like is that what you were hungry for? Were you hungry for like, oh, this will be like a nice yogurt parfait with some piquant ramen. I'm sorry, I swam so all done. No, give me some weed and I'll eat exactly the meal she was eating. I can do that.

Okay. Mrs. Woolowitz. Woolowitz. Oldest penguin at Edinburgh Zoo killed by... Oh, is this a pigeon one? No, no. Okay, sorry. Penguin.

Mrs. Wollowits, oldest penguin at Edinburgh Zoo, killed by Fox. The oldest penguin in Edinburgh Zoo has been killed after Fox broke into its enclosure. Staff have announced. Other penguins in the enclosure were not heard and were doing well, the zoo added. This one is for the sea. Penguins. Oh, this one is for the shunnies. It's like what? Okay, thanks. Thank you, Riley. That's all that is. What's the pigeon? What's the pigeon one?

How more than 40 worshippers die as church catch fire for Egypt. Dozens of people don't de-f-de-fire break out for one church in Egypt. Officials say at least 41 people don't die at and dozens injure. Electrical fire break out as 5,000 worshippers gather for mass-foredeeco, deca, boost-seafing church, security sources to all raiders. I thought it's one of those words. No, it was. You read it right. You're right. You're right.

It's. Oh, worshipers done. They explained the moment since defy your start. Oh, that's it. That's horrible. What happened to them? Thank you very much, Pony. Were you with?

I have no idea what I just read. Somebody, something bad happened to the church like normal. Like people died. Yeah. Fire, I think. A very big fire. Nick, you're going to be covering the Maryland Manson case. Oh, that's going to be like a year out.

Oh, yeah. Because if they've got to go through the California anti-slap process, first, so that's going to be like six months for a hearing on that. Anti-slap. Anti-slap. So, uh, yeah, slap is a strategic lawsuit against public participation. Oh, I thought that's like something new they're putting after what happened with Wilson. It should be. Do you? Should be. What do you think is going on in that relate? Do you think that she's got his balls

and that Jada's got his balls in her purse? Yeah. Yeah, right? Do you think that Jada makes it? I think psychologically he's definitely in a, you know. Do you think that's happening to a lot of guys? Like they're all, they're like a ranger scrambled by. I think it happens to a lot of guys? Like they're all, they're fucking rangers scrambled by.

I think it happens to a lot of people regardless of their gender. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Do you think she makes him only look at Shota Porto? No. No, I think she makes him watch as she fucks someone else.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Do you, wait, okay, this is a serious question. It doesn't sound serious. I know I do this all the time, I'm a professional. Do you think she pegs him? These guys are obsessed with pegging, everything.

Yeah. You think she does? I thought about it for a second, and I think, and I think, I think he didn't used to be into it, but he got talked into it, but now he's grown to enjoy it. Okay, here's the follow up question. And again, I'm just as a journalist, I have to follow these leads. Would you respect a man who asked you to peg him?

Because we asked a handcuffed question earlier and you said, yeah, you, you could be into a guy who gets handcuffed by you. Yeah, I talked about this the other day. You talk about this the other day, this time on question. Yeah, because when we were in Italy on the boat, we were at dinner table. And one of the guys had an amazing idea,

which now I'm gonna do at every dinner table I am with friends forever. He said everyone's... It wasn't picking though. No, no, that would have been a more fun night. But he said everybody put your phones in this bowl and we're just gonna talk with each other, right? Sure.

And we did that for the remaining of the trip, which was like the next three nights, and it was the best time ever. And we went around the table and like we would ask a question and everybody would answer it. So somebody asked like what is something that you would like a sexual fantasy? Right.

Great question. Right. And so this girl said, should we do this game next? Should the three of us play? Absolutely. So the girl said, I like picking a guy. And I was like, whoa, I would have never thought she's the most honest, assuming girl ever. Really? Yeah, I was like, I never thought that's, like, she's like the most honest, assuming girl ever. Really?

Yeah, I was like, I never thought that's gonna come out of your mouth. But it was so hilarious. And I was like, we were talking about it afterwards. I was like, so, like, have you done it? And she was like, yeah, like, sometimes I bring it up to guys and they're not into it in the beginning, but then... That's what I wear them down. But like, you know, if we're like dating...

If we're like dating and they're in love, how many of them did she marry? What did she look like? Just insanely gorgeous, insanely gorgeous. Wait, I'm going to try to guess which one I'll show you a picture. Okay, don't show it on camera. I have a costume. When we went out one night, at one point, I told myself, you need to stop complimenting her because it's getting weird, but she was just so gorgeous. What kind of stuff would you say to compliment her? Just like, you need to wear that lipstick every day.

Like you look like I dream of Lima, not like Creepy stuff, but I just like, if she's just really pretty. Wait a minute. I think if I said that, it would be creepy. Yeah, girl, you need to wear that lipstick every day. You look like this is really bad. I was like, just wake up every day

and just immediately pull that lipstick on. I have no service, because. Are you guys connected to my Wi-Fi? Here, I save all your stories if you- This is how it gets you. Listen. She is, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah one night that joking I'm out. Oh, yeah, I'm so unalormed. What is it?

Uh, which one is it? Oh, here. I'll blue yonder. Yeah, I'll put in the past. Okay. Now just announce the password on air. That'd be great. So how do we get there? Pegging. What was the question? Yeah. I just was curious if so. What I respect the guy. Yeah. After Pegging, after Pegging him, did she change your mind? Oh, no, no, no, you were saying would I want to do it? Oh, like you mean after I did it. No, I was asking you to respect them afterwards. I don't think that that would mean that I would do it. Right.

So you wouldn't do it. You wouldn't peg a guy. I've never really had to think about that. I did have to think about that. One time I went out with a guy that he was kind of like dropping like the hints where I felt like he might swing both ways which nothing wrong with that. Right. What kind of hints was he? Like, you know, this is her page. I don't know if I'm like picking a photo for you, but here like, look at her face.

Oh my God. What happened? Just like the most generic face. How did she get into it? I didn't ask. You didn't ask? No. But to be precise, my question was, if a guy came up to you and said,

hey, I'm into pegging, would you respect that guy? Yeah, yeah, if it's someone that I'm dating, right? I'm all for like telling each other all the crazy, freaky, deep, dark shit that we're into, not on the first date. So your question where it's problematic is you say, what if a guy comes up to you? So you're making it sound like someone's just coming up

to me and telling me this, no, that would be weird. Okay, yeah, that would be fucking weird, right? But if I'm dating someone and we're opening up about like, you know, things that we're into, I would want him to tell me what he's into. I'm not necessarily gonna do it, but we're going to talk about it. Right. So what would you say to him when he's like, okay, you're like 15 days in. I'm not going to do it, but I have a friend. But I know a gal. Wow. I'm not so in because of those yacht parties after all. What was the guy you dated saying that made you think he was gay?

Yeah. Just like little things like. Like, I wonder what that guy looks naked, like stuff like that. No, no. How do you think I would look kissing out? No, no, no, no, no. That's more than a hint. That's like, I mean, two guys.

No, but it was just. He's always joking about being gay. No, I think he actually said something like that. Like if I'm dating a girl that I'm really into and she really wants to do that, like she really wants to peg me, I would do it for her. Which that doesn't even like hint that hands that he's, you know, gay.

Yeah, at all. I mean, actually what I'm, no. You know you have a G spot in there. He doesn't. I don't know. Maybe you should have. No idea that I have a G spot in there. He's got a blown out.

You do not. Maybe you should explore your body. Just put a finger up first. All right. No. Does that tank top look like a man who explores his body? explore your body. Just put a finger up. Does that tank top look like a man who explores his body? You have a wife though. Maybe she can explore your body.

I do. I do. 18 years of marriage. What's your secret? This is a personal question, but I ask anything. I'm, I'm, I'm. I've never slipped the pinky. No. Would you let her no dear God? She wouldn't do it because she wouldn't respect a man who was in to butt stuff on his end You don't know that maybe No, I don't I don't think I'm projecting on this Maybe you wouldn't respect a man So we've been married a very long time and had very extensive conversations about our,

our society. How old are you? Me? Yeah. I'm 40. So you haven't had your prostate checked yet? It's not about a cherry. No, yeah. If I look, if I marry my doctor afterwards,

I'm completely wrong and I'll may a couple, I'll remember the end. Your marriage is, days are numbered, Nick. And as you get that prostate checked you're done and not a man anymore But again believe me my my wife and I've just spent 12 days in the Caribbean We're we're pretty pretty familiar with each other sexual intimacy Well, maybe it's time for new stuff I'll bring it up to her and then I'll call you.

I'm just for time. Time to size it up. So the new stuff is just to be clear, the new stuff that you're advising is getting things shoved up your ass. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Starting with a pinky.

Yeah. Breaking. We've got to start soon. We'll see where it is. Is it you just like breaking? You just like seeing what guys will do, right right like you want to see what they're you enjoy seeing what they'll submit what humiliations they'll submit themselves to for your approval is that it?

I just want you to open your mind and expand your horizons and expand and your expand your said you wouldn't peg a guy. Not right now. You're what I'm 40. What are you for? Actually, no, I'll grant you that. You probably, yeah, when you're 40, you can, you're not giving a fuck about anything. You run out of things a bit. There's always something new.

And it doesn't have to do. There's plenty that doesn't involve anything going in your ass. I'm going to warn my legs. I don't know what else to do. Okay. Nick, we're going to do this. Wait, real quick, what's on your, what's on your finger? You have a cool like finger. This is what I wear before. Oh, that's your packing finger. You can't have to shredder. She's just crushed your rude. All right, Nick, thank you. Hang around. I'm just going to do, I'm going to play the song and then listen to voice mails, okay?

Cheers. All right, goodbye. Nick, Nick, Nik, what do you, Rikita Law or something, YouTube? Everybody knows. Rikita Law on YouTube, Twitter, wherever. Locals, Pony, Pony on Instagram. Pony on Instagram, yeah. Sorry, Sean couldn't be here for the shot today.

Nick did it. I miss him. I'll tell him. I wanted you to come in when he wasn't here just to punish him. Aw. He's not in the art. Page.com slash the dick so she next, who's there?

Presenting dick. All right. Dix. Dix. Dix. Dix. Dix. Dix. Dix.

Dix. Dix. Ready. Come on. Big money, big money, big money, big money, big money. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Big money big money big money big money big money Okay, okay, okay, how about this one?

Hey dick Those gone Five two five Shit fuck mmm shit is yeah fuck dude, just fucked. Shit's fucked. Shit isn't. Yeah. So, you know, you got a groin in your room, shell like that. You could have fucked that something, you're just too fucking retarded, autistic to do anything.

Literally. I'm literally so autistic. I'm so fucked, dude. But I datched so artistic. I'm so fucking stupid. But I touched a bullet. I could uh, she better such as good at lying. She was bipolar. She was fucking retarded. And she's scared of election. I touched a bullet. I gotta fuck that. Natasha bullet. I got a farm. God damn it.

I'm sorry. This is very kind. Do you think that guy needs therapy at all? Yeah. It's very complicated drives. I think most people need therapy, by the way. And you're getting into it. I agree with you. Really. You don't have to be crazy or like a terrible person to need therapy. No, I just have to be. I want normal people to get

therapy. Yeah. Work out through your shit. Like how much therapy. Then that's that depends, you see, like if you're a terrible person, like your Kiwi friend. He's got therapy. He might need like a team of therapists. Yeah. You know, okay, maybe we're going to get all this therapists though. Just wait for me to get my doctorate in three years. I'll be at your service. Thank you.

Oh, all right. Therapists don't need a doctorate though. They just need a, you need be at your service. Thank you. Oh, right. There are best don't need a doctorate though. They just need a, they, you need a master's degree. Yeah. You need a, you know, you know, with a master's, is a master's. No, no, you cannot with a bachelor's degree. Well, you could be a counselor with a bachelor's degree, right? Um, maybe, I don't know.

I think you could be a counselor's with like a McDonald's happy meal box. Yeah. No, to be therapist, to be a therapist, you need, you need your master's degree, for sure, but you can be, you can be a doctor, which is better. Okay. Here we go. Hey, big. I just listen to the newest episode.

And you mentioned you want to hear from young people, people who are in a team decision. Well, I'm 20, I've been listening to you for the past four years. Not a speaker. It's like, ever so dirty. And I gotta say, I think it's fucking insane everything that's going on. A lot of people, I don't think it's insane,

but a lot of people don't see a problem with it either. It's bizarre and really fucking stupid, and I just about hate everything around me because of how stupid it is. But everyone agrees that all the shit that and the Dr. Nation Center literally mental illness within my fucking generation is so fucking bad and the fact that people are obsessed with their fucking tech dogs and Instagrams, you can call me wherever the fuck you want to call me, and just like, and you're whatever the fuck but I just think it's fucking dumb and I have it around you to be absolutely insane for no fucking reason.

And then they'd be driving the paper pointing out the fact that this is all the most with the martylo bullshit. Anyway, go fuck yourself. Thank you. Therapy for everybody. So maybe today. Just to add to what he said, mental health is not worse.

It's just you hear about it more because both people are talking about it more and there's social media. So you just hear about it more. Do you think that we're hearing about it more or that the psychological industrial complex has created more ailments to keep themselves in business to justify the high amount of graduates

entering the field in a limited market. What? Do you think we're... Yes, exactly. Do you think it's being promoted? Like overly promoted because it benefits so many different groups. I think there's always whenever there's money to be made,

there are always people who are gonna exploit that and they don't care about your actual health and they're gonna put cancer in your food and wanna cause issues for you so they can make money. But that's always been the thing. But I think there's also more information at your disposal. Like you pick up TikTok, you can learn so much from TikTok, they're learn so much from TikTok.

They're amazing therapists, they're amazing doctors, they're amazing professionals that are just teaching their life long learned lessons or expertise that they're like teaching you in one minute long. Like I actually, like I used to hate TikTok, like I used to like hate on it too,

but you learn so much from TikTok. You grow. Social media can be bad for you. I haven't learned it. I mean, it can be really, it's how you use it. I think it's how you use it. I think you can go on Instagram and you can look at people who have better lives and look better than you and you compare yourself and you feel shitty.

Or you can follow amazing people who motivate you and inspire you and you learn. It's just how you choose to use it. Then what? Can I follow people who have worse lives than me on TikTok and be happy about the life that I have? Yeah. Oh, I'll sign up for that. Yeah.

It's just that even those worst people they're not showing their worst moments on their social media. So you're not gonna see those. Anyways. That's what makes it so funny. Because you know that even as bad as they are they're probably worse yeah they're not putting out their bad moments they're putting their best so you're still not gonna see it okay well I

didn't have toilet paper drives me fucking insane and it might just be me I just be my situation but goddamn every time the toilet paper is out, I can still... Hey, the toilet paper is that you're in place? You're in place? Bitch, I can't exclusively at work. During the day, at work, um, the clock. I am not using any of our toilet paper for anything. So fuck yourself.

It's a pretty healthy relationship. He doesn't clean his butthole? He only shoots at work. Yeah, so he only uses work toilet paper because he's got it here. This is a trick that you have to learn when you work in corporate America. It's the only one who uses it. Yeah, so it's on her. And she probably will have to sit around all day in the kitchen doing nothing, right?

Like that's what we've learned. Okay, Andrew, say. Thank you. I'm kidding, of course. Joe, okay. I do have a question that's actually been stuck on my mind for the past couple of days. And it's very important, very deep.

Oh, okay. What are the things where? What are the things where? Two of the papers over or under. It's very important, very deep. Oh, okay. What is your favorite? What is your favorite? Toilet paper over or under? Like on the spool? Yeah. Coming out at you. So over.

Yeah, over. Yes, always. Everybody can agree that it's over. Yeah. I hate under so much that if I go to someone's house or even public bathrooms, if it's under, I will change it and put it over. Yeah. Because I feel like I'm doing like a service.

Well, okay. Okay. Way. Side mounted toilet paper in public bathrooms, though, towards you or away from you, because it's not over under anymore, right? That over under only works if it's perpendicular to the wall. But if it's parallel with the wall, it can be towards you or away from you.

Does it matter at that point? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's, no. I, do you understand what I'm saying? Yeah, I have a better system though. Okay. It is when the toilet paper runs out, you leave the roll on and you just put the other one on top of it. I hate you.

If I see that, I will switch it for them. I'm like, I'm just gonna do this. I'll put another one on top of that. I don't care. I don't want anybody else come after me and have to go through this. I'm just gonna change it. Swirl it, not pull it off. It's not... I was at the airport today. I didn't check the toilet paper before I went in there. So I had to, I was going to crawl under this tall to get it next to me.

But because I went out, usually I'll check, but I went in there and there was a guy cleaning the sinks. So I thought, okay, the first thing you do when you go in here is stock the toilet paper. So I went in there, I didn't check. No toilet paper, I thought, okay, I'm gonna crawl into the other stall and like reach under and get it. So I look and there's feet,

and I look and there's feet in the other one. Okay. I think I just asked, what'd it be weird? What'd it be weird? Like, hey neighbors, sorry to bother, but I ran out of toilet paper. Do you think you can hand me some? Sorry, I hope this isn't weird.

Can you throw a lunder and bring it into my stall? I said, I said, I'm like, God. I'm a spunk. Shit, like I just discovered it. You need to hurry. Fuck. I'm at a toilet paper. Can you, can somebody please hand me some? And the guy next to me goes, oh, don't worry, buddy. I got you. I'm like, toilet paper. Can you can somebody please? Can you hand me some?

And the guy next to me goes, oh, don't worry buddy, I got you. I'm like, okay, thanks. And then he hands me probably like... Like the tiniest amount. This much toilet paper. Brother fucker. Did you say anything? I can imagine your face just standing there.

Fucking thanks, lot. And he was an Asian guy. I could tell in his voice, like, okay, you got like. Preserve. Efficient. Yeah, I never know how much. I was like, this is acceptable for you. I mean, you're like waiting outside of his doll

for him to come out so you can have a conversation with him. So then I had to wait for, I don't want to ask again, because then it would upset like annoy him. So I just waited it out. And then when he left, I reached under. You should learn the fine art of origami. It helps you with that problem. Yeah.

Would you use the same piece like 20 times? Yeah, you just keep folding it. It's perfect. Oh wow. Oh wait, here's a voicemail about Andrew Tate. Oh, that's here. Hey, Jay, K-Sharn. I think this is pretty important for you, Dick.

Okay. A couple of ways. So please listen. So, TikTok's been out for a couple of years now. And recently, not just TikTok, but fucking anywhere, Andrew Tade's taken over. And I guess it's a big plan ahead of his and good for him. He's very intelligent for what he does. And I just want you to know though, as a big fan of yours, I pay attention

to everything and everything that's come from your podcast in a half per year. I've never seen you involved with TikTok and I know that you necessarily probably don't want to be, but it finally happened. And there's a clip on TikTok, and I'll put it in the discord, something I don't usually do, but I don't even know what my name will be, but you'll see it. It's going to be a TikTok clip, something more obvious than Discord. And it is of you, when you originally had Andrew Tate on the show, and he's talking about that situation where it's cooked, I almost got killed. It's a shitty clip.

It's not even good. It's one of those weird ones where they got to put another video clip of some stupid game like you take a or something as well as you guys on top split screen in order like to keep the intentions of fucking off his own stuff i don't know why they do that you're showing point is that one i don't know if you knew that you're on tiktok now you are with this clip and to uh... you don't get enough credit for being the person who I Feel like breach the barrier for Andrew Tate

I'm on the show way before he took over the internet. I mean the song a couple years maybe if I'm remembering right? Yes anyways I'm calling midweeks. I'll try to make sure I get that clip up before you show on Sunday Okay, also I just want to say thank you you don't know it but you've been playing a lot of my voice mail over the summer so it's w-e-t-p in the biggest problem and uh... i've just been getting a real kick out of it you're making fun of me you've been agreeing with me it's been a whole ride

so thank you boys appreciate it you really do uh... uh... pay attention to your community insurance that's awesome uh... ticket and uh... and love you son thank you for the warning that you'll be pay attention to community and share it. So that's awesome. Take care. Book off. And I'm on the left. Sean. Thank you for the warning that you'll be posting something in Discord. I do think I deserve more credit for that. Actually. Yeah. I wanted to ask Pawnee. So now that you know that Dick Masterson is responsible for the thing on TikTok that you hate, which is the rise of Andrew Tay.

Would you peg Dick Masterson? Like, I know you're not into it, but would you do it on punishment? Yeah, you do it harder. I do it without a loop. Paul F. Shumden dry. Just kidding. Every time it comes to pegging, I always think like, well, we don't know what they're,

like, they don't know how to use it. It's not that hard. No, trust me. It's fair. We don't have credit for working back on all of your sexual experiences and actually ask yourself if it is that hard indeed. Because I bet you run into a lot of you. You think you can use a straight point, but not that hard. Like, I mean, you know, or you think you could use it like a pro. Yeah.

With no practice, we've been practicing our whole lives with this shit. I'm doing a mediocre job. I think What would be your opening move? Because that's like four play or like go on Going in. Oh, that's like the first line of the novel like you really got to nail that It's gonna slowly Slowly Slide it in there's no The whole artistry it's like you know I was saying, like slowly dip your toes.

Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing.

Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing.

Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. Tell me what your toes are doing. If it's a pegging, I'm assuming you don't want to shove. Well, if you're not using Loub, then definitely not. I think you're going to throw the game. I would have to just go for it. No, I would use Loub. Oh, you would. I don't hate it. I'm talking my way out of it. Okay, but what if it wasn't a guy? Let's go back. Oh, you would. I'll say I'm not talking my way out of it.

Okay, but what if it wasn't a guy? Let's go back. That was a woman. Yeah, it was with a woman. Yeah, because I think Dick was asking you in context of you were using a strap on as a man with a woman. Right. Oh, yeah, I think at some points, I would be like a little out of breath, but then I think

I would be like a little out of breath, but then I think I would take what? Why would you be a little out of breath? What is that? What is that? What is that? What is that? What is that? Oh god, damn it.

What? Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait, I need to be out of breath. He's got my blood. Like a guy's perspective. Like when he's like doing it, I was like. Wait, so my breath. When he start with you, they're out of breath. I feel like I would be out of breath. Oh, no, these guys.

I feel like I would be out of breath. Oh, no, these guys. I feel like I would be out of breath because it's like a lot of work. Ah! Oh, you're mean. Oh, my God, you can't be out of breath at the start. Out of this is a lot of work. Not in like if you do that for how long. Oh, I've done it for a long time.

I'm really good. That's what I end up doing. That's what I end up doing. And if you're doing it fast for a minute, you go out of breath. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, funny. How fast? Oh, God, I feel like an 80 year old man

that stamina's horrible. I don't have great stamina. I feel like, I can't really run. You just said how easy it is. And your immediate reaction was that you'd be out of breath. So I think the only problem I would have was would that be that I would be out of breath if I'm going really fast for a really long time. But then Jack can't ring this portal wall. But then that's what I'm saying.

Like I would use that time to slow down. Okay, we do do that. We do. Make her get on top. Like we're not bunnies. Yeah. Yeah, they don't like that. You know.

As soon as they realize you're going too bad, you can slow down. Yeah, they don't like that. You know? As soon as they realize you're going too bad, I think it's slow to answer that. You can tell me, you can't tell me that, like you've never had a moment where you were like a little out of breath. I've had a lot of moments where I'm out of breath. No, like wall having sex. Yes. How can you know what?

Yeah, all the time. I climb a flight of stairs and I'm out of breath. No, this is what you need to do. You need to exercise. You need to do another breast cram and my exercise. I exercise every day. What? We should do it more stairs, like I just,

I just, like I don't exercise and I'm not out of breath climbing a fly to stairs. You know what? I'm sure there are some of the listeners that can relate. I hope so. I hope I don't just stop. Yeah, there's a lot of listeners that can relate. Okay, so your move is breathe heavily.

Jackhammering. No. Okay, so your move is breathe heavily. Jackhammered. Jen, Jackhammering. No, that's on ceremony. I wouldn't want to fuck me. I should be surprised. All right. I feel like I would be a good dude in bed. Okay.

But there's no way we're ever going to find out. How much does that suck? What do you mean we're? Huh? Oh, because you're not as good. Like, yeah, oh, you're so fast. You could change though, you could get one of those penny pasties.

I saw one today. Good. Maybe one day. Maybe one on 40. So that's what I did. You got a penny plastic? Yeah, I've been a woman my entire life until just recently. Okay, what else do I have here?

I was on all sorts of boats. Hey, this, oh man, I just want to give in my calling with my serious topology. Regarding your arms, it's not the moment. Latest bonus episode, holy shit. I'm so sorry. If I work for where you work to where you are right now, the only listing and curling I would be doing is listing a gun to my forehead

and curling my finger around the trigger. Keep your head up, does man. It doesn't get me worse than that. I don't think I love it. I love you. John Kisses. You know what he's talking about? No. When you first met me, I had just torn this.

I do remember. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. I had just torn this. Yeah, I remember. It's out. And I was huge. Congrats.

I looked like Lou Ferigno. Like, extremely. People would say all the time on the street, like you're probably the biggest guy I've ever seen. You're probably the most muscular arms I've ever seen. I would only work out my arms. Oh, I see. That's it.

No stairs, no legs, no nothing. All I had in my life for my arms. Yeah. Like Mike Tyson has his pigeons. Yeah. I just had my arms, but since, like Mike Tyson has his pigeons. Yeah. I just had my arms, but since this, I haven't, you can't. I haven't even used this arm for like four months.

Oh. So I'm like withering, I have like woman's arms now. Sure. Like noodle arms, like a little boy. That must be terrible. It's horrible. I guess you're like, I was talking about. Like if you just saw arm line up between me and Nick, you wouldn't be able to tell who's,

you're like, I don't know which one of you is which. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, yours are much smaller. That's what's going on. They don't look that small to me. Thank you, that whole bit was just so you said. I think you were fine. Telling your head. Okay, one more.

I don't know. Is it doing these look good to you? How about so many? I know. They're all great. They're all special. Yeah. What is that girlfriend? Girlfriend criticizes haircut. Let's go. Don't make me mad. I just gotizes haircut. Let's go. Don't make me mad. I just got a haircut. Haircuts make a mad. I just went to,

we just haircut in before I go to work, because it's getting all ready. And I get back after paying 30 bucks. And what's the first thing my girlfriend says, but, oh, it looks choppy. Like choppy. But I'm a choppy. And I, of course, I don't know it,

because I don't know what the fuck I'm doing with this shit. She knows that. You have long hair. You try and take care of it. You do all this bullshit in the shower to make it not fall out of your head, which it does anyway. You don't rub it with the towel, because that's the best for the hair to use the microfiber towel. No, always don't. He won't. Because it doesn't work anyway.

And then you go to get it. Oh, shit. Okay. See, he needs, I got like that needs to annotate. Don't you think? I don't think anybody really needs to entertain. Come on. I mean, this guy's out there.

He's getting a high-end $30 haircut and it doesn't work out for him. I love that. I all paid $30 for a haircut and you think getting a high-end $30 haircut and it doesn't work out for him. I love that y'all pay $30 for a haircut and you think that's high-end. If you knew how much wind will pay for hair. No, we know how much wind we pay for. It's very upsetting. Because we pay for it. It's good to see you again. You too. You have any fun trips lined up? So I was supposed to go after Germany. I was supposed to go to Greece and then go to Spain, but I just cut it short.

I was like, I just don't have that in me. Just too much. Yeah, that's way too much. That's right. I was like, my extrovert battery is completely out. I need to just go curl up by myself at home in the corner. You need a book or whatever. Yeah.

If you want to pull up some show to porn right now, you see how far you, Nick, or you're, I know your audience would probably love that. If we all got it, I fear the stickiness of my audience after some show that shows up. We could watch boys, we could look at boys of piano. I know, uh, flamenco's, uh, uh, uh, my whole fuck, uh, where are you going to be like that? All right, everybody. Thanks for listening. I want to do it. No, we're not really looking at Shota porn. We're just imagining it, which is identical. I know what I'm going to Google first thing I get.

I'm kidding. Let's see. No. You're kidding? Yeah. Okay. I think you're not even going to Yeah, okay, I think you're not even gonna maybe know I'll look it up. You will look it up. Uh, SHO TA. Okay, I'll let you know. Yeah, it was a review. I'll give you feedback. I'm Span three months masturbating to it and then give us a full review. All right, bye everybody. Thank you, Nick. Bye. Thanks for coming in. Nice to meet you, bye everybody. Thank you, Nick. Bye. Thanks for coming in. Nice to meet you, Pawnee.

You too, bye. Okay. Goodbye. That was fun. That was fun. Thank you.