The Dick Show - Episode 338 - Dick on Fireside Chats

Episode Date: December 20, 2022

Nick Fuentes uses the studio, Hitler wins a debate, Elon Musk bans eyesight, California assembles a reparations committee, Karl and Vinnie call in with Creeps, "Murder the Media" J6 defendants call in, Pani reads news, and my soap gets replaced; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!

And what kind of engineering could you do if something were to you're not an audio engineer if something were to go wrong in what school Could your engineering help us Fucking around until I find it out Mainly is that a discipline in engineering? Yeah, it's called dropping out of community college Are you an engineer then? I dropped out So you have no engineering experience at all. I took a couple classes.

Uh-oh, what was that? Uh, Carl's gonna have to wait. Yeah, admit. You took a couple classes? Yeah. I got the basics, though. Oops. Oh, good thing I, Carl, you wanna wait around?

Did I say 230? All right, all right, we gotta go. We gotta go. So what kind of engineer are you? I was going for mechanical. Get on the microphone. I was going for mechanical. Mechanical?

And then I got the basics down, I was like, I don't need it. So you're a mechanical engineer. Sure. So what could, if something went wrong in mechanics, some, there was some sort of transmission malfunction, you'd be able to, if that arm, if that boom arm would have fall, if something was wrong, if Pawnee's clothes, if something was a malfunctioning with them,

they're through mechanics of some kind. You could step in and help with that. Oh yeah. But like a real engineer, I'd probably just write a work order and fuck around the engine. Engineering jokes. All right, here we go everybody. Sean is on vacation.

I don't even know, I don't know what to do with myself when Sean's on vacation. I feel like a guy with a hall pass, right? Here's a hall pass, fuck whoever you are like, ah, it's not harder than I thought it was. Shit. Forgot how to do this. I forgot how to do this.

I'm not good at this. That's how I feel when Sean's not here. Like I talk about anything I want without his correcting record, without his fiendish correcting Sean is in the hospital right now. He drowned in a semen from blowing Pfizer executives. How about that? All of his COVID misinformation. You're not gonna get any of that today. None of that? All of his COVID misinformation,

you're not gonna get any of that today. None of that, none of, there will be no misinformation on the podcast today. It will be true today. It'll just be things I read online. Yeah. No misinformation, no interpreted stats. Okay, here we go.

I had something planned out to talk about, but I'm fucking forgot it. Yeah. Close. Buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, in the hottest city of failure. I'm your host, Dick Mash, it's an AK, the 20-millndal man. Joining me is he does sometimes Kevin the engineer, the mechanical engineer. Yeah, pretensioner. Pretensioner who doesn't even have a degree, who doesn't have a fucking degree at all,

you've duped me Kevin. For years. I let you into my, I gave you my assassination coordinates. So you could show up where I was real time and caused me this irreparable harm When you think about those assassination coordinates, you know, you used to have a book They would send out with everyone's assassination coordinates called the white pages. You remember that? Yeah, is that before your time? No, yeah remember that real time They could find your info in real time and assassinate you.

Yeah. Crazy. No one cared about it then. No one should care about it now. I don't know what Sean's, I don't know where Sean is right now. I need a, I need a no-rad tracker for Sean so I can track his journey across the country. But such a thing doesn't exist. Big week.

Feels like this is a long week. It started with Nick Fuentes, the most, the white surprise. What is the new line for him? Every time I hear about Nick Fuentes, he gets a new tag at the end of his name. Yeah, they just keep adding to it, right? Yeah, white supremacist, Nick Fuentes, white supremacist. Nick Fuentes, white supremacist, Holocaust denying.

Nick Fuentes, in cell, woman hating misogynist, white supremacist, Holocaust denying, it gets longer every time. Yeah, I hear about it, he was in studio, right here where I'm sitting, talking to Alex Jones, it's a real, huh? It's a real. Yeah. So it's like the internet coming to real life right in front of you.

It was watching Alex Jones get bodied in my studio. That's why I have this screen screen behind me because there's all these cocks on the wall and I'm like, I'm not gonna do the young man dirty like that and have a bunch of penises for screenshotting all over the internet. How old is that? He's like 24, right?

24. Dude, what the hell were we doing at 24? I was on, Dr. Phil is saying that all women were horrors. That's what I was doing. That's what I was doing. What were you doing at 24? Dropping out of community college? Kevin.

Yeah. So here's the best part. Here's the best part about Nick Fuente is coming into my house, right? So he's in, he's running Yez campaign. First off, I always say, I don't care what anybody says. The worst things that people say, the funnier it is to me.

Like I just really don't care what it is. We used to have, it used to be on TV, on daytime TV, on talk radio all day, like the most insane white supremacists of all time, just saying just the most ridiculous things and everyone laughed at it, then it was fine. And now it's just not that way. So every time it comes up, I gotta say like, oh yeah, it's really, you know, I don't usually win Kanye's on TV saying, I love Hitler, it's actually hilarious.

Yeah. I don't know if you didn't know that. Have you, some have you forgot somehow Hitler, it's actually hilarious. I don't know if you didn't know that. Have you, somehow you forgot somehow, but do you, it's hilarious now, today, just as it was, 30 years ago. Remember, dressings when he's dressed up like a black toe, saying I love Hitler? That's actually, actually hilarious that he's doing that.

I don't, it's nothing else but hilarious. It's like everyone forgot about like GGL and like just anything that happened on spring or back in the day and. Yeah. Stern. Having the grand wizard fucking guy of the Ku Klux Klan, whatever. So what was I saying? Oh, yeah.

So Nick is doing Nick Fuentes is doing his interview with Alex Jones. Because Alex Jones called him baby Hitler or something like that. And Nick Fuentes implied that Israel called Alex Jones and told him to, there's a lot of implying and implying going on in the sphere. So they have their debate.

And Nick Fuentes needs a studio. It's like, of course, come on. What are you gonna give this guy? You're gonna set this guy up in like silver lake at a rental studio with a waltz or paper, paper then he's screaming about Hitler. He's going to get shot. Yeah. You make this guy a facetime in his car outside somewhere in LA. That's embarrassing. Come in here. It's a, it's a bunker. There's a, there's a shotgun over there that I can sit at the door because your assassination coordinates are out there and I don't want any goons showing up, you know, to guilt you into walking back your statements. So I tell my girlfriend and she goes, let me ask you a question.

So, okay, shoot. Because be real with me. Be serious with me. What are the chances that Kanye is coming in with him? And I said, absolutely zero. Zero. There's no chance that the most famous musician in the world is coming to our house with he has tons, he's access to tons of studios. He would just buy one rather than go from Beverly Hills to you're talking about the the worst traffic about zero. She goes, no, be serious. Don't just say bullshit.

I said, okay, 1%, she goes, so the, you're telling me there's a chance. I said, well, what do you think? What would you put it at? And she goes 80%. I said, okay, don't talk to me anymore about this. I got serious stuff. I got not your bullshit to think about.

So, here's why it's so funny. There's always been this soap, this hand soap, in our guest bathroom, where you press it down and it's like one of those foaming, self foaming ones, but this one's jammed up or broken. So it ejaculates the soap, like just like with it like a supersoaker. You press it down and it's like,

it's all over. So everybody that goes in there, guys, for some reason women don't do this, probably because they don't wash their hands because they're disgusting. Every guy comes out and goes, oh yeah, you're soap, like got all over my wiener and like my shirt and stuff.

And then I had to use water to wipe it off and it looks like I pissed my pants. And I'm like, yeah, that's the fucking maid. I keep telling her about this. She goes, why don't you just replace it? What am I? This, I don't know where the fuck the soap is. But that's not my department.

I'm not the soap quarter master here. That's your bathroom. I'm telling you, so you can you're going to go in there and start fixing everything that I see that's wrong in there because I'm it's going straight in the trash everything in here. There's curling irons. It's all going it's all going into the garage. That will see then we'll see who likes touching whose stuff. Okay. Um so Nick comes in comes right down into the studio. Nick point says he does does his thing with Alex, Sean's, you know, I love Hitler. No, you love Hitler.

Nobody loves Hitler blah, blah, blah, blah. Um, and he's done. We go out to lunch and he says, um, he says to me, you know, I got to tell you something. You were, uh, you might, You were the first person to red pill me on the woman question because I saw you on Dr. Phil as a kid and I was like, wow, what the hell is this guy saying? I'm like, you got to be fucking shitting me, man. So I am basically like the impetus for the entire

grouper in cell movements. That's all can be traced back to me by its root. You just, you basically started a Holocaust like that then, because you caused yay then. Yeah, pretty much. You know what? The guy who came in here, who did the Trump billboard? Remember the guy who came in here and did the Bill Maureen PC billboard?

Oh, yeah, yeah. You remember that guy. I got school. Um Kanye. He also did a thing in New York where he said Kanye 24 like yeah, Kanye 24 for president and Kanye tweeted that like four or five years ago with a thinking face. Hmm. So it's pretty cool. Uh, yeah, I don't know how. I mean, I don't know. I wouldn't say you put the idea in his head, but maybe, at least he used it in his case. Anyway, I get back from lunch with Nick, and I'm trying to not to talk to him about this shit because I assume he just gets hit up all day every day for people who want a piece of Kanye.

Like, can you tell Kanye that I think he should give me some money, he's a... So I come back after lunch, I got tacos all over my hands and I go into the bathroom and wash my hands and use the soap and what do you know? The fucking soap has been magically changed. Somehow the idea that Kanye, the 1% chance that Kanye was coming to our house.

And magically she gets home and I said, Hey, what happened to the soap that comes all over everybody that I've been complaining about for like months? And she goes, oh well, if Kanye was going to be here, I didn't want, you can't have that happen though, yay. You can't get soap all over yet. I was like, you're even talking ridiculous. So now every show you've got to be like, oh, there's now a two percent chance.

That Kanye is coming here. And then, you know, by 90% of whatever, you're just gonna have a brand new house. People are ripping on my studio too. I posted a picture of Nick Fuentes in here and they're like, this cable management is at Troches. It's a mass, you gotta clean your room. I'm like, it's a fucking comedy show, guys.

It's not a cable management show. Go fuck yourselves. Ah, let's see. Let's see what comedy show guys. It's not a cable management show go fuck yourselves. Let's see Let's see what else happened today this week Oh, have you ever had those visa gift cards? Yeah fucking nightmare every time they're fucking nightmare every time So here's something that you may not know that they do. If you spend, I was using one and it said declined and I was like, okay, it's just out of money, right? 20 bucks, 30

bucks, whatever, it's out of money. Throw it away. Using another one, declined again. I was like, that's odd. I'm sure because I was brand new. So I call them up. I'm like, yeah, it's just decline. He says, so why? He goes, well, our policy is that if you use them at two different places in a day, we mark it as, we put a stop on it. Wait, what? Wait, what?

Yeah, yeah, that's like our policy. If you use the card at two different places in a single day, we put a lock on it and it's marked as fraudulent and then you have to call in and unlock it. And like, dude, is that like, so you're saying all these cards that I've been throwing away has been because I used it at another place in the same day and he's like, yeah.

It's just like our policy. Don't those expire too? And then they usually lose your money? They expire, there's a monthly fee, they're so fucked. So all this time, how much money are people throwing away with these stupid gift cards? Because it's crass to give cash, I guess. Right, every year, just Venmo me.

Just Venmo me, they've fucking money. Let's see what else I got here. Oh, I was on TMZ complaining about Elon Musk. Do you see that? Yeah, what was that camera though? You looked like you're completely different than what you have here. I don't know. They make you do like, they call on Skype and they wanted to look like, like you're like a real person and not like a person to like, yeah, like I don't have a studio. Like they want you to look like you're a real person and not a presenter. Yeah, I don't have a studio. They want you to look real. They told me to put it on to balance it on the desk.

But then I have to duck down. Let me see if I have it. You looked like you had scoliosis in it. Yeah, I look like shit. They have me on there to talk about Elon Musk. Let's see here. Okay, here's the full segment of me on TMZ. We're going to take a break.

All right, when we come back, Elon Musk making a big change. Yeah, okay. Complaining. Okay, so I'm on there. Elon banned this kid. Elon Musk banned this kid for tracking his jet, right? Because of their his assassination coordinates because a little little nozzaxe or whatever was in his car.

I mean, that's what he says. Little nozzaxe was in his car. I think he filmed that video like not too far away from here with there's no fucking airport. So yeah, I call bullshit filmed that video, not too far away from here, there's no fucking airport, so yeah. I call bullshit on that, but they had me on a complaint about have you seen the Elon Musk stands arguing? Dude, every time he posts, you go to the immediate replies and it's just like people, like within 10 seconds

of him posting, they're already typing out some like 300 character tweet or whatever and then people immediately defending him. What do you guys do all day? Yeah. The defense of him is, the defenders of him are outrageous. In this week, I have seen, or I don't, maybe it's the last month, I have seen conservatives flop from all speech is absolute and free speech is like very important and it shouldn't

be allowed. I have to take it to court if you have a problem with it. The constitution is absolute. First amendment, blah, blah, blah, too. Yeah, billionaires, private jets that fly around in the fucking sky and everybody could see that they should have an expectation privacy on that. Yeah, yeah. Flightflightradar.com or whatever, where you can track every flight that's ever going on. That should be illegal. Yeah, I've given it that. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Flightflightradar.com or whatever where you can track every flight that's ever going on. That should be illegal. Yeah, I've given it that. Yeah, I mean, it's like

and the analogies that they use it are like, well, you're driving around in your car, someone's not allowed to search your car without a warrant. Like, you can see my fucking car. Yeah. Driving down the street. You can drive on the same roads as me and watch me go places. Like, what's the difference there? You can watch the plane land. I can see it at LAX from the 405 coming in, right? It's really insane. The amount, like the crackdowns on speech from the right have become,

are becoming as swift and capricious as the ones on the left were, and the noticing of grooming everywhere has become at least as bad as like racism is everywhere. Yeah. Like, well, you see that? Well, you know, that's grooming. Yeah.

Like, well, they've got this, this, this, this drag show is marked as quote, all ages. And there's a guy pulling baloney out of like his growing area. Yeah. That's, that's textbook grooming. Yeah, yeah. Because all ages doesn't mean like, oh, we just don't have a liquor license. Yeah. That's just like not forbidden. I guess it's, this is the legal denominator for this show, all ages.

They're encouraging. Okay. There's no one's. I saw, here I saw this one right before the show today. It is a, oops, oops, oops. Let me pull this up. Oh, anyway, I'll get to that. Here is me ripping on Elon on TMZ. He'll phrase it's something about some

of my oxen scored office. This is Gordon. Right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah about you. Right. All that flight information is already public. Like, and this kid, having an app like that, it's successful. That's a big deal for a kid. It's totally ridiculous that he would mess up that kid's life like that.

Yeah, ridiculous man. I'm not sure this kid's life though was being messed up, I think. But is it, is it he's threatening to sue him? Elon? Right, like, okay, anyway, look at this, you see this background, I kind of messed up a little bit when I did this interview. If you notice carefully in the background, there's a flesh tone.

There's a giant dildo in the background. Okay, anyway, let me see what else I got here. What was it, he offered him like five grand to take it down or 10 grand or whatever? Five grand. And the kids would say, well, give me a job or give me a Tesla.

Don't they fucking hire anyone at SpaceX? Like, dude, just give him like a, anything. So the crazy thing is that kid is like obsessed with plain data. Yeah. And he's got all this shit. If you go back and look at his side and stuff, he's got all this information on why that,

that quote, like privacy thing that the FAA does, is bullshit, it doesn't work, couldn't possibly work. And then his thing is like proving that it doesn't work, like because you got everything's got radar on it. Yeah. It's easy to get around. And then you go on Twitter and the first thing he says, well, he hacked it.

He hacked the privacy. What the fuck are you guys, like does that even mean anything anymore? Do you guys, how exactly do you react it? Well, he hacked it, you know, because it said it was private, you changed the sign and then he hacked it to get around it. Oh my God, you guys, just walk through it step by step

without skipping steps. How did you do it? Well, he's got in there, hacked it, and then his information is out. His assassination coordinates are out there. Done it, done and done. Let me see here. Dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude.

I hacked, fitting the cups inside the dishwasher machine. Oh, Trump ended. Did you need Trump NFTs? No, I fucking missed out on it. Yeah, me too. There's some good ones too. We're there? Yeah, let's see. I'm gonna look for them.

Best, Trump NFTs. I heard he stole some of them. I mean, is that possible? That they're like stock art? Collect Trump cards. This has got to be licensed shit like Trump stakes, right? Oh, don't. He doesn't actually make any money off of them.

I can't find anything. Oh, wow, is this them? Oh, yeah. Trump in a Space Man suit? Whoa. That's pretty cool. Trump is a G man suit whoa cool Trump is a G.I. as a flight guy. Why are the aviator sitting so high on his face?

Who made these Trump as Yeah, I missed out I definitely missed out by not getting these. It's got like an A or A or A or a vibe to it, you know? Yeah, it really does. Oh man, this has got to be a beauty. How much is this going for? At least 40 grand, if they want.

At least 40 grand. Yeah, wow. I think that's the end. This has got to be the end of Trump. Like, what do you do after that? They sold out right away, right? He like, I don't know if he made it, but transactionally, there was like a million dollars

or whatever for all. No, probably not. But you could just fake buy those things if they don't sell out. Yeah. We got it. Wow. I think this is, I put up a poll to see if this was more offensive than the swastika.

It is Kanye's swastika. Yeah, I really think that it is, especially in the face of like the J6 guys who are rotting and who are going to rot in prison forever for this NFT, for these NFTs. I don't know how much, how much would it have been worth it? Like how much money would have made it worth it for this to license your shit for an NFT collection? Like if you had a time machine and you'll go back to January 6th at the Capitol, could you show them that this way and be like,

do you still wanna go in there? You wanna go in there? You sure? This is about a year and a half from now or two years or whatever. See, here's a good one for you. The reparations committee. This is a California reparations committee who said to decide how much and to whom money should be paid for racial terror and housing discrimination. And final public meetings this week. Did you know about this? The figure to put together a racial committee to figure out

to whom the money should be paid. Oh. Here's a, who's money? Well, that could be anyone's guess. Here's a quick rundown of the race of the committee. Oh, okay. All right. Well, they all look like a trustworthy individuals.

There's something in common with all of them. Let's see. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, eight out of ten are black. I think they need a little more diversity in the reparations committee. Come on. I don't know. There's no Latinos in there. Did they get reparations?

Latinos? They should. In LA. Yeah, no shit. This isn't the deep south. There wasn't a lot of cotton being picked in California. What kind of reparations are they getting paid for in Southern in California? Where's the, uh, the back wheel?

That's the job as community. Yeah. Uh, we need some more Latinos on this committee. Oh, I'm sure they'll do a great job, but the root of the meetings on reparations are concerns over the mass incarceration of black residents, unjust property seizures, devaluation of black businesses and healthcare. Oh, wow, plans proposed in previous meetings. So it's a, it's a committee of how to give out reparations.

Well, why not? Money doesn't mean anything anymore anyway. It's all fake. Yeah, it's all fake. I'd rather our, I'd rather our Black friends in California get it than Ukraine To be honest early this year they put together a thing. I don't know cool Cool reparations cool How about this one? It's legal to kill cops in Idaho. Do you know that?

You want to go do a road trip? Yeah, I kind of want to move there now, Idaho. Legal to kill cops. It's now legal. A new Indian law says, let's citizen shoot police officers. The state now allows people to use deadly force to keep public servants from illegally entering their homes or cars.

Police, I'm not happy about it. Yeah, the tables have turned. Oh, man, I'm gonna build a really a big house. All around, you know, like they do in New York, the Jews have a wire in New York so they can like trick God into not doing showmer Shabbos stuff. Did you know about this?

It's about the Sabbath, right? So they can like secretly use electricity on Saturday. Yeah, in New York, there's like a fishing wire. There's like a wire that goes around the whole city. All the island, I think, right? Yeah, so that Jews can say like that's a house or something. It's like a barrier. It's like a force field for God. Yeah, so that Jews can say like that's a house or something. It's like a barrier. It's like a force field for God.

Yeah. So that their covenant with God isn't broken because they put a fucking fishing line around the city that everyone else has to pay for for some reason. Yeah. The maintenance on that thing. That's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna go to New York and say,

well, I'm a fucking orthodox. I orthodox to wish and i'm in my house according to this fucking fishing line pop up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up say that this vision-like thing's retarded, are you? Is that's not what you're saying, right? I'm clearly in my house. Take it up with God. If you don't like it, I don't think that, I don't know if that plan will work though. Okay, let's talk to, certainly worth a try. Let's talk to Carl. Let's see if Carl's here.

Uh, that Elon Musk thing has annoyed me so much. It annoys me that people aren't annoyed by it too. Right? This is a big, that kid, at least Milo was like, being very racist when he got banned. He was the first one and then it was Gates Open, ban whoever you want. This kid's doing the most like lukewarm. It's just information.

It's just straight up information that's publicly accessible that anybody could get access to. And Elon's having a fucking meltdown over it. It makes me think that anything, all if there was actually something politically valuable, like the Hunter Biden laptop story that got covered up and all the COVID should that got covered up,

all that the people who wanted covered up would have to do. All they would have to do, all they would have to do is threaten him with something like equally benign, like a homeless guy yelling at your car. Yeah. It's like, okay, we'll get rid of it. Yeah, like undo what you're, you know, and we'll make it go away.

I don't know, he seems very like, I think easy to threaten. The most annoying part about all that to me is the third group of Twitter reply guys are the people who are like, well, this is just the perfect example of the strizzy end effect. It's like, oh dude, you're so fucking smart.

Yeah, people are gonna go. You really fucking put those two together, huh? Yeah. All right, let's talk to Carl. Let me see, Carl, are you there? Carl! Hey, what's happened to that? What are you doing, buddy?

I am very well by yourself. Good, and Vinny. Hi, Dick. I have beard. Looking good. Damn, man. What are you growing that for, winter? I like it when my wife pulls it.

I'm trying to hide it's got, it's gonna take a few more years. It does get people to stop looking at my tits quite so often. Like, oh, it's a nice beard. Now you have like biker tits though, and you have a beard like that. You're like, yeah, I'm not just fat. This is like my build.

This is like my character. Right. Build. It makes people feel like I choose this. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Like it's worth knowing that it says they're fat.

It's just like, yeah, you got that. That's how you look. Vinnie's one of those comics that if he did lose weight at the rewrites act, so he has no motivation whatsoever. That's incorrect. If I got divorced, I'd have to rewrite that dance. Yeah. Yeah.

If you made it ugly, broad, you got to rewrite your entire there it is. Can you believe I married you and ugly chick? Yeah, we can. All right, this is done. This is got a great night. Take care. You just need like a leather vest Coming. Yeah, Christmas is coming. Maybe plethora for just a try it out. So what do you guys? Carle?

We have a big big show big live show. We do coming. So we have April 22nd in Philadelphia. Yeah. Market under calendar. Take us. We'll go on sale next year. I think Nick Ricate is going to be there. He said, that's awesome. He was shit faced on his birthday stream. I don't know if you caught any of that. No, I didn't. I missed it. You missed it. Yeah. He was getting really drunk, calling people, F-slurs, calling Kiwi Farms, F-slurs. He was on YouTube anymore. He was on YouTube. And then one of his panelists had this, this like in-sell meltdown on this girl like this.

He's like a lawyer. He's like an accomplished lawyer telling this woman that she doesn't know shit and to wipe this kind of sending smile off her's like a lawyer. He's like an accomplished lawyer telling this woman that she doesn't know shit and to wipe this condescending smile off her face. It was awesome. It was an awesome birthday. That's great. But he's coming and he told all of his fans to come. So it should be a fucking massive show.

Well, it's gonna sell out. This theater holds about 320 people, I think. It will definitely sell out. So we'll be making an announcement to purchase tickets and it's gonna be a party in Philly that whole weekend. I can't wait. So what are you guys up to?

What are you guys up to? All right. So we obviously co-host a show called The Creep Off. I've talked to you about this before, Dick. Dick's done the show. Yes. Yeah. I wanted to talk to the Dick's audience, you know, kind of through Dick right now.

We've talked about this before. So we have the only true crime show on the internet that's actually four men. Correct. Every other true crime show is for women, women like true crime. But we do true crime show where we have a lot of fun with it. There's no pretense to the gourd. Yeah. Right.

When I purl clutching. Correct. Right. We're not pearl clutching. Correct. Right, we're not like apologizing for people, we love it. And it's a contest, our show's a contest. And one of the things that we do on our show is we do the scum parade. That's right, that's where we go all over the country and we look at all of the horrible people who did something atrocious in the past week. Okay.

So what we thought we would do is bring you three horrific stories. Oh, okay. I'm the dick show. Okay. And I thought we could have some fun with this, because Vinny does a very good job curating these stories. He loves this shit. My soul is dead. Correct. But I gotta tell you, I know what's going on. Yes. All right. You guys, you ready for this? Yeah, I love this. Comparate. I was probably you ready for this? Yeah. I love this. I'm sorry. I love this. I love this.

I love this. I love this. I love this. I love this. I love this. I love this. I love this. I love this.

I love this. I love this. I love this. I love this. I love this. I love this. I love this. I love this.

I love this. I love this. I love this's 23 years old. She got caught. White woman? I, I, from the mug shot, no. Okay. And it wasn't shot negative. Is she a mug shotty? Do you see those? No. There's hot mug shots.

No, yeah. No, she, there was nothing really attractive and she wasn't really posing for it. She just looked kind of miserable. It's true. But she got busted in the Walmart and she was there with her one-year-old daughter and her sister. Now, they stopped by security at the front doors

and asked to step into the security guard's office. Well, Jamira came up with an amazing diversion. She put her one-year-old daughter on the ground and that kicker is harder to put in the past. Right into the security office. Now I have to say in her defense, everyone has world cup fever right now. Yeah, it gave to the world cup. It was amazing. I'm kicking everything that comes into my path right now. You're not wrong, Carl. In fact, I have audio from one of the witnesses who saw it. Go ahead, girl. You know, Central Plane, everyone.

How far did you get to go? How far was it? Did anybody measure it for record or something like that? There's video, but it has a total of 12 yards. Did I actually go and get the wrong way? Was it a drop kicker? Is she like, I don't know, she said on the ground. It was a place. It was a place shot. Okay. Okay. Laces out.

It's Charlie Proud made Comtack. Right. Is there actually video of this? There is, but it's not been released to the public yet. But I will keep on it. And you will be able to see it on the creep off as soon as it's available. Did I deck? I wanted to find it.

Yeah. Did it say if she was wearing a cleats? She was a barefooted kicker. Kicker, I heal off, I just really slug it. She's a meal to kicker. As this happens, they give the baby to the aunt who's there and they're trying to like comic Daniel down while they're waiting for the police to arrive because these aren't the real cops.

These are like Walmart employees who are trying to deal with the situation of a baby bead place kicked. So she starts screaming at the end and talking her to shut the baby up and then starts grabbing the baby away from the ant. It's right up there. The baby was upset for getting kicked across the board and did not stop crying.

In fact, bitch, and the article, the word inconsolable The baby was upset for getting kicked across the floor and did not stop crying. It's a little bitch. And the article, the word, inconsolable, is you. The baby just wouldn't get over it. I don't know what the problem was. Fucking babies. Either way, here's the good news. The baby was checked out by an ambulance and they ruled that there was nothing. Well, they ruled. Holy shit, this wasn't. It was good. It was good. Three points. No, they said that the baby was okay. So I highly recommend Dana White signed this kid. Yeah, right. Seriously. And tried to shake it to death. Yeah. And she's still okay. She's well, emotionally, no. All right. Yeah. Exactly.

But did she get out of the clear? All right. What was the security detail for? Why did she get called in there in the first place? She was shoplifting. Oh, did she get away with the merchandise? No, she got my job. She is definitely jail. She's spending time with jail. That's too bad. And the baby gets to spend Christmas not being kicked with family. That's true. Fans, that's cool. Did you guys see that video, like maybe a year ago of the woman who threw a puppy at a guy during a road rage incident? Oh, yeah. You saw that?

Yeah, she's like, just a huck during puppy and we were like, oh my God. To be fair, those are around everywhere. Yeah. Look at the spiral on that puppy car. Look at the arm on this broadsheet. Charks that puppy. 65 yards in the air. Wow, that got weird.

All right. So, either way, the baby is spending Christmas with family. Now, here's a fun little game I like to play, Dick. It's called, just let's decide who is the creep. Oh, okay. Because there's a victim here and then there's a creep here. And you tell me who's who, all right? Okay.

We're gonna talk about a trial that's underway right now in San Diego, about the murder of a guy named Thomas Maryman. He was 64 years old and he was a butterfly farmer. He was found under a pile of trash in his driveway by deputies responding to a welfare check in January of 2021. His stepdaughter, interior designer, Jay Janks, had picked him up the morning before that on New Year's Eve at a facility where he was recovering from a fall. She was arrested for murder at the scene of the crime. Now, I had Carl send dick a picture of Jay. I just emailed you to a inbox. There's a photo of Jay.

A tractable lady, I have to say. Yeah, she's definitely not bad looking. So, the medical examiner said the cause of death was acute, basically ambient poisoning that he OD'd on ambient and jacked Daniels. Yeah. So, here's the interesting part. Here's what they're accusing her of. The deputy district attorney setting court last week that this was not an accident, this murder was designed. Jay Janks apparently discovered well this man was in the facility as she was cleaning

up his apartment for him. She bumps his laptop and it goes live. And the screensaver is a naked picture of her. Okay. Is it avoid, avoid costly mistakes? Is that the one? That's her. Okay, let's switch over there. All right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's Jay Janks. So, all right. I mean, there's worse screensavers. There's the one in Carroll in the Cal Bikini. That's Jay Janks. So, all right. I mean, does worse screen savers, does the one that Carle and the Cowbacchini? That's true. I wouldn't recommend that one.

But I always say though, if you do have new to family members on your computer, don't have to do the screen saver. Just don't make that part of the screen saver. Just a rule of thought for me. She testified in court that as she went through this guy's computer, she found files of pictures, they could pictures of her classified by body part. So he's organized, that's good. How did he deal with the body parts like hangman or like a doctor?

She's like vulva back of knees. So apparently these are pictures she had taken with her ex-husband and then also pictures she had taken when she was like a teenage girl that she was sending to boys because apparently she has a little bit of the sorted pass. Okay. She's sending pictures to a bunch of people and he pulled them off the hard drive of her phone or off the hard drive with some camcorder that she had and he had it all filed already.

And she apparently, according to the prosecution says she lost her mind and that's why she murdered him. Listen, I see a lot of videos where step-dotards actually like it when the step-father comes out of them. Like normally that works out really well. I think the guy she'd anyway, it works out really well. I think the guy's seen anyway. It works out really well. And it works out really well. And it works out really well. And it works out really well. I think the guy's seen anyway.

It works out really well. It works out really well. I think the guy's seen anyway. It works out really well. It works out really well. It works out really well. I think the guy's seen anyway. It works out really well.

It works out really well. I think the guy's seen anyway. It works out really well. It works out really well. It works out really well. It works out really well. It works out really well. I think the guy's seen anyway.

It works out really well. It works out really well. It works out really well. It works't want to be the one to do this. I can't carry him alone and I can't keep hiding his body in my trunk. Wait, what? I'm getting there. I'm about to club him on the head if he wakes up. One of the people she allegedly texted was referred to as quote, a fixer by the prosecution, though that person declined to help her. Another man who was sent text messages from the one who is the one who called the police to go check on this guy. So she's texting people like, I need help moving a body because what her plan was she what she picked him up from this facility went to the store, bought him a bottle of

Jack Daniels and drove him around while he drank and took pills. And basically like, awesome. Made this guy give it to a side. Sounds like a good way to go. The driveway, she just leaves him in the car for like 24 hours and just let him die. They wanted to bring him to the bed and make it look like he just cried. Oh, deed out his own. So she left him out there and make sure that he was dead.

Yeah, the funny system didn't work this time. So that's what she started texting people. By the way, when I do something highly illegal, the first thing I do is immediately start texting everyone right now. It's details about it. I'll send out a mass email. I'll see you see everyone.

Yeah. That's what everyone knows what's going on. You would have a better chance of getting people to help you move. Yeah, that is your friends. You can go and help you move with a body of your pervy stepfather. How order pizza, baby? Come on. Yeah, has she not heard of taskrabbit?

Yeah. Just slow at top of him and find somebody with a really low rating. So, you've got a really low rating. She's just gone to Home Depot and got a day laborer. Yeah. 50 bucks. They found the guy's body in the driveway with garbage. Yeah, I just found the top of it. It's a bimmy some time. So she just kicked them out of the door or dragged them out and then threw garbage over there. That was like, I keep carrying them. So she covered it in garbage. I can see one.

She wasn't playing it on her fucking buddy, ratted her out at the cop showing up to come check out the guy. Oh, what an asshole. Yep. So she got arrested on the scene, but she claims she went on to, she testified this past week. And she said that she wasn't trying to hide anything from the police when they showed up to look for her.

She said, I just wanted to turn it before I showed her where he was. Sure. That's her defense. That's fair. I'm proud for him. I'm proud of him. Yeah, that's a good one. Yeah.

Yeah. Either way, we'll find out what happens. She's got quite a good one. Yeah. Yeah. Either way, we'll find out what happens. She's got quite a record, too. She was arrested multiple times for drug charges, possession of stone goods. In 2007, she was charged with possessing stone IDs of more than 10 different persons. Wow. Yeah, so she's a bit of a problem. That's odd.

When you're a hot chick, you don't have to commit crimes to get ahead of life. There's no one told her that. But what else gets them off though? Like we didn't win on a rider steal, get in the shoplifting or something. Like what's the thrill anymore of you that? I think we don't ride on a driver anything. Drunker stepfather to death if I'm not mistaken.

I mean, it's a little bit further than shoplifting. I also think that there needs to be like a, like there needs to be some kind of sliding scale of crime against the elderly where the punishment isn't as severe because they're so annoying. You know, I've talked about this too. I totally agree with you on that. I think there should be something about like, well, how much longer were they going to live?

Yeah. Right. And then you go like, well, how many years is she gonna do? He was gonna make it to the 67 maybe. He's an alcoholic. Like how alive was he? I'm like 85% alive. He was alive in a life and a life and a life. To be a problem.

But if you can murder someone by tripping them, it should be murder. Yeah. That's just an accident. That's just a bottle of jack and pills, man. I'm gonna put him there. That's my solution to the homeless problem in LA. We just go around with like a fire extinguisher of fentanyl and just spray it all up like

you guys go, go nuts. What is it? I don't know. And if Andy Dick happens to be there at the time, what happened? That would be cool. Holy shit. So this thing is going to the jury. We don't know who, if she's be found guilty,

or if they're going to say that she did pre-matter this. So I guess my question is, who's the creep? The stepfather for having the naked pictures of a stepdaughter on a computer? Or the daughter for straight-up murdering him and lied about? Yes.

All right, they're both creeps. I'm going to need to see the pictures to judge that. Well, I mean, the guy was a butterfly farmer. What's up with that? That's weird too. Yeah. What do you get for butterflies? They don't make honey.

What's the point of that? I feel like we should save the butterfly farmers because for some reason, I feel like the butterflies might be useful. And I don't think a lot of people are lining up for that job. Okay. Oh, you think the butterflies might be useful in like a, like a sign. I don't know, metaphors. I don't know.

I don't know metaphors. I don't know. Having butterflies around seems like a good thing. Yeah. The fuck do I know? All right. Let's move on. I see why your show is the only true crime podcast for men, by the way.

A crazy woman getting weirdly violated by a stepdad and then buried in garbage. That's not the kind of true crime that I'm used to hearing on those shows. Yeah, we don't, we don't spend a lot of time on Jeffrey Dobber. Yeah, we have four fun stories to tell. Correct. We brought just one more for you today, Dick. Okay.

I sent you another mug shot. The guy named Michael Barajas. Okay, boy, look at this guy. He's a he's a butte. Trusting strangers. Just my rule of thumb. Facial tattoos is a thumbs up for me. But this guy's already made a lot of good decisions. Let's go. Yeah. So you don't even need to see the shark teeth, Carl. You already have. I've heard, yeah, now let's go. Now when you look at that picture, you think bad parenting.

But you know what's even worse, parent aid, be the parents of the daughter that just decided to go with this guy somewhere. Oh, yeah, this is insane. Authorities in Michigan have arrested 36-year-old man on multiple counts of involving the kidnapping and sexual assault of a 22-year-old pregnant woman who is allegedly held captive for three weeks. Now, just try to get him on Thanksgiving point. That's right.

That's right. That's right. You're pregnant. Jesus Christ. All right, you want peanut butter and ice cream. Fine. You're imagine. Jesus Christ. All right, you went peanut butter and ice cream. Fine, I'll go get it. How was your kid never woman?

Three weeks. Kid, a guy, rich guy. She got kicked out of her house on Thanksgiving weekend. So she's obviously some kind of problem. I was gonna say yeah What kind of a contesheet that she's pregnant she's 20 years old though like the fuck out of here We got a number of you should add again. She's the kind decided to take a ride with this guy when he came walking Saw her walking down the street be it all sad with fucking Charlie Brown music played. Yeah, he pulls up This guy with a shaved head and an unshaved sideburns and beard. Oh, that's what you're concerned about.

That's odd. I understand the shark teeth. Like that looks badass and the face tattoos. I don't know. It seems like they got a little messed up and maybe he just tried to cover over them. Like that's cool. Maybe it looks like you tattooed out of black clown nose. Yeah. I've never seen the tattoo on the nose before. That's not.

That's rare. And somebody gave that to him though. Like that guy needs to be brought in as well. But the beard and the hair, an inch or two above the ears all the way around. And then the shaved head is like an ongoing choice. Like these are just mistakes that he made. Yeah, he's a state clearly has no problem pulling the trigger on a questionable fashion choice. I have. Good boy. I can say that that's not an argument for me. So he sees her walking down the street

and he says, Hey, once you come to my house and warm up, you can take a shower over there, you can hang out at school. I mean, and she said no, right? She said that's crazy. There's no way to get out of here. We'll turn that down. Oh, I would have. When you got nowhere else to go, I'd Thanksgiving. Well, I've never been to the shark man offer you to come out over to his cove. I'm very sorry. I'm the fuck this lunatic live. The second thing you do to the house, she brings her up to a guest room. Walks, she walks inside, he closes the door, locks her in there. Then he comes back in and ties

her down to the bed. She was like, the windows are fucking nailed shut. That's my window. He's got a bottle. How many girls did he try to pick up before her? They're like, fuck no, that's insane. You know, it's a numbers game, Dick. That's the whole thing. Like every, every jacket, 70 times, just think that one. Yeah, guys don't understand that. That guy's heard on Rikeda's stream. Didn't understand it.

Since I read this story, I would try to think to myself, what would possess someone to like go with this guy, just look at him at face value? And I think it's like that beauty in the beast syndrome. Yeah. Where like, or that really crazy syndrome, where we're like, I could fix him. Like that shit my wife has. And I get a beard. She made you worse. Yeah. Hey, guys, this just in girls make bad decisions. I want to see that guy's short to hard to get all the hardware for that. Yeah.

I'm talking about that. I'm happy. He's like, I need something to tie down. Something that might try to get away. Did he? Because this happens to me when I want to see that guy's trip to Home Depot to get all the hardware for that. Yeah, I know. Yeah, I know. I need something to tie down. Something that might try to get away. Did he, because this happens to me when I go to Home Depot, did he say like, okay, I'm going to build a rape, a rape room in my house. I got to nail the windows shut. I'm going to go to Home Depot and here's the list of stuff and then he comes back and he's like, fuck, I got the wrong size, the wrong size screws.

I got to go back to Home Depot. That's, fuck, I got to finish. I neede, but that's fucking, that's why he goes lows. That's why he goes lows because they have those helpful printouts. So if you're going through the aisles, it's like, hey, Ray Broob, you just pull it down and it gives you a list of what you need. He's like, you know what, I'm just not gonna do it. No, could you imagine he comes back and he's like, oh, this is fucking metric fuck. You just supposed to beat this job. Sorry. We're building a rapeshake. Go ahead.

The one thing that surprised me here is that once he has her chain down or tied down, the windows are nailed shut and she's in there pretty good. Ratchet straps down probably. Ratchet straps. Yeah. Never go the ratchet straps. And that's even right. It's fucking down here.

This guy, Michael starts calling over his friends and he basically just starts pimping around. This is the part that's crazy. So yeah, he has friends. Normally when you have a hostage situation and you want to just rape a hostage, you do it yourself. You don't want your buddies over, but this guy is just like, hey, good news. I want to know what that communication looks like.

What does that text message look like? The one thing I've learned here about my most chat. Yeah. He's generous. He's a generous guy. Offer to replace to stay and he's offering his friends pussy. What a great guy. What's the emoji for there's a pregnant woman tied down to the bed that you forgot?

Then I forgot about that part. You're not going to knock her up. Well during this time, he basically would threaten if she would try to escape that he would bite her jugular out of her throat with those fucking teeth. That was a standard threat. I would take that seriously. Yeah, we got him. Those teeth are cool though.

If you could grow your teeth back, wouldn't you want to like try shark teeth for a day? Did he not even shave them symmetrical to how the teeth are laid out? Well, he's not a dentist. This is not professional work. That's been done to his teeth. I mean, if I was going to do a combination of meth and a, a, a file. Yeah. I was going to do that.

I have to file and imagination. Guys, my teeth look better than this guy. Even I'm scoring on the test. Oh, that's not bad at this. Hit that goal sound effect. 12 more times. By the way, dees Snyder, I love you guys. You remember the twisted sisters front man?

Yeah. Did the same thing with his front teeth? No, they did. Yeah, back in the 80s, he totally regrets it. Because dick, you'll be shot to the other. They don't grow back teeth don't grow back. That sucks. Yeah. These guys teeth come back and rose after one falls out after a fight. So how did she escape? Did she escape? She's still there. She forced the woman to okay. Why do you want an invite? I know, I want to see what's going on here.

So he apparently, they look better than Buggie's teeth though, don't they? He looks better than Buggie in general, yeah. A panel that she started having some type of medical emergency. You don't start. Yeah. You know what? You got all the stuff.

Weeping and military. She got COVID. Yeah. So you get a lot of stuff. A person full of so much seabed. Yeah. Before doctors have to intervene. And this, what would they end up taking her to the hospital?

He let her go to the hospital, just like, fuck, get out of here. Yeah. And keep our secret, though, right? Yep. Don't tell the hospital, just like, fuck, get out of here. Yeah. And keep our secret though, right? Yep. Don't tell anybody. You got sick of the relationship part of it. Yeah. She started getting comfortable talking to him.

Yeah. Yeah. Three weeks is about to write about a time to go. You got to go. Ah. Ah. Ah. Well, I just imagine this motherfucker with those teeth.

Santa waiting or waiting to find out. Is my sex slave slave gonna be okay? That's what every libertarian wants. Yeah, telling you man. And just he sat there waiting for it, and they recognized the resides of abuse and that police guy's ball didn't arrest the ball. Oh shit, shit, shit, all that,

sorry, sorry, sorry, that's too loud. Oh, fucking, stop, shit, all that. Sorry, sorry, sorry, that's too loud. Oh, fucking. Stop, stop, stop. All that. Besides of abuse, her fucking labia looks like a surfboard that someone took a bite out of. So that, that gentleman has been arrested. Yes, he is.

The charges are kidnapped in first degree criminal sexual conduct, human trafficking and assault with a dangerous weapon. Teeth. And I saw the video of the sheriff or the guy from the sheriff's department who made the arrest. Yeah, he was very proud of himself. Very proud of himself. And he's like, by the way, this is happening all over the country every day.

Like, is it? Sure, kids, man, I'm sure I'm abducting pregnant women on Thanksgiving all over America. Every day. It's like the crampus. Beware. This is like the new story that SNL based land shark off of. Oh, okay, there you go. This is like a cautionary tale that you tell your girlfriend or wife before Thanksgiving,

so she like just cools off really like, you know, if you get in, if you get too upset and leave a shark tooth man, we'll abduct you and bite your jugular out. And it's this friend's rapier. What you do, Dick, is what you do. You share that story with her, like you email to her to a texture and they go, I'm sorry, that wasn't for you. My bad. You just got to float that seat and settle it. It's fucking inception. Have an AI deal. Sorry. Did you see that guy that broke up with his girlfriend with the AI chatbot? Brilliant. Yes. Dude, we can be using as men, we could be using this chat bot technology for so many great things with women. It's hilarious because just keep repeating

the same shit over and over again. Yeah. It really is how like a T-Dirt would break up with their girlfriend. I mean, it's just like talking to them in every file. Oh, you're right. Well, you know, this, this, this. Actually, you know what? It ramp up the anger.

100% her fault. Go. Yeah. I was reading the story today that they're very worried that AI is going to basically allow anybody to have term papers and stuff like that written for them. Sure. Yeah, of course. Yeah.

Once they're at a term paper, I want to see the AI rebound text. Oh, yeah, just constantly texting your exes to see when they'll fuck you. Yeah. Vinnie, wouldn't that be horrible if all these college papers were written by a computer? How would we know who's, how would we know who to hire at our, at our point? How would people know who to put it?

Who to start just taking? How would our friends, fathers know who to hire at their company of a computer, right? All of our payers. I guess I would just hire computers. I guess this is the answer to that. Yeah. Oh fuck me.

All right. Hey, go ahead. Dick, we're doing a crossover show on Thursday this week. Yes. Yeah. We still have to schedule that, but we're doing a who are these podcasts, the Dick show, crossover show. I'll have it out before Christmas, everyone. Um, cool. You're not asking me, but I'm telling you what makes me a rage right now. I'm on megaphone is my podcasting platform.

And I uploaded my show today and it's not working. And there's no support. No one works over the fucking weekends, even though podcasting is 24-7 assholes. There's servers about her, some shit. This is drives time. My fans need this for drive time on Sunday. They expected. Dick. Dick. This is like a song.

You're sending guys to church with nothing to secretly listen to in their airbuds. How dare you? Thank you. My fans have dry balls. Why don't you fucking get your act together? Yeah, now I agree with you. My fans have dried balls. Why don't you fucking get your act together? Yeah, no, I agree with you. I can dole. Thanks for your concern.

Did you see that YouTube canceled that Cancer Kids account or terminated us? Yes. Wasn't that hilarious? I saw Nick Tweedick about that. Yeah. What the fuck? What's wrong with them?

I don't know. I don't know how like you have a billion dollar company with zero customer service at all. It's great. If you fuck up on Amazon, you get somebody on the phone in like 10 seconds. Yeah. But Google's impossible. A lot of companies have like PR departments or PR partners. Yeah. Like they're trying to get bad publicity out there. Yeah. I was like, yeah, this will make news. Let's get this kid canceled. It's kind of good though, right? Like he got his 100,000 thing and then he got the experience of being like a pariah, like getting canceled too. Yeah, I'm ordered. Yeah, look at the full experience.

Get the full experience. Did you guys see the Nick Fanta's Alex Jones debate? No, I saw him out in there with, yeah, I haven't seen the debate. I didn't see that. Vinnie, you see that from your house though, he did that. Yeah, that was from my house. That's pretty impressive. Yeah, it was cool. One. Hitler. You know, if they're talking about you, you know, that's all that matters. You're in that line of work. Let me see, I don't know, anything else? I mean, the hot topics.

Well, the main thing is, people should check out the creep off. We do the creep off every Monday afternoon, 1 p.m. Eastern time on YouTube, on the creep off YouTube channel. And of course, it's the podcast that you can check out, Patreon, bonus episodes, all that fun stuff. The creepoff.com for all of your information. And tomorrow we're gonna have the creep mess.

Oh right, the creepiest Christmas creep. Creep, yeah, we don't think these things are over there. Creep mess. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Have you ever done like a, who's the biggests. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. Have you ever done like a, who's the biggest creep of like, East celebrities? Yes.

Right? Do East celebrities know? Well, I've actually covered Chris Chan quite a bit. Oh yeah, we've actually just finished doing our third bonus episode about the legacy of Christine Westen Chandler. And East celebs is a pretty good one. Uh oh.

Oh shit. Well, we lost them. I didn't know that there was a limit on Google Hangouts now weird. Yeah, let me tell them. All right. Well, that was Carl and Vinnie from the creep off There we go. There we go. We're do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. Do do do do do do. Nick, how you doing? Hey, good afternoon. Good afternoon. Let me just send this text ran out of time. I did a guess. Okay. Tell me real quick. What are what names are we using here today? For you and your compatriot. Yeah. I'm Nick. His name is also Nick. I'm Nick Oaks. He's Nick the I'm Nick Oaks, he's Nick DeCarlo.

Nick Oaks, Nick DeCarlo. All right, why don't you give everybody a quick intro for what's happening to you? I gave a tease at the beginning that some J6 guys were calling in, but we've just had a very silly segment with true crime with some comedians. So this is a very hard, this is a very sudden tonal shift. So I apologize if we're giggling because what's happening to you is really horrendous,

like Soviet era. We're not going to, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to be, we're not going to, we're not going to be, we're not a funeral here. We're not, we have given no set of interviews and will not be giving set interviews. So we can keep the mood light because that's our mood. We're not troubled. Also, the car was not in the room with that. I gave him the same number of calls and the fee boxed out.

We'll work it out if so. Okay. So, tell us what happened to you. You are, you're going to jail for how long? Now, I guess we'll start there. Yeah. They slapped us, man. We both got four years, four years for being present at the Capitol. And, oh my God. It seems excessive. If you were to ask me, and people sometimes do. Yeah. It seems excessive. maybe four weeks,

seems even that would seem like a lot. Couple of Saturdays, can you service really, right? Yeah, man, four years, like a high school, a fucking degree. And are you gonna jail or prison? No, prison, yeah. Fuck. Okay, tell us the story, please.

Sure, so me and my criminal defendant, my literal partner in crime, we were reporting for a media out that called Murder the Media. You may recall there was a doodle in the door that made a lot of people really nervous for some reason, but that was really just a bit of self-promotion for murder the media. And so we were there for the only thing, we go out and cover big events, right? Like the Trump rally that day was what we flew in for. Not unusual for us.

We go there there we are not exactly straight news you know we have some fun we do some free interviews to ask some laughs yeah i try to calculate the doofiness of this time i think we do a pretty good job anyway that wasn't much you know it was just another boring rally a lot of boomer hopefulness so we walked around till we found the crowd being a bit more excited, proceeded to film every thing. So you found the crowd before they were led into the Capitol or before they were in the Capitol, you found them outside?

Yeah, sure. We were walking with, you know, wherever people are walking. And got up there and found that the crowd was yelling at the cops. And the cops took that heart pretty quick and started throwing flashbangs at their heads and then disintegrated from there. Yeah. I've found an article written about you guys, The New York Times, covering pro-Trump

mobs. The news media became a target. God, they love putting themselves up on the fucking cross, don't they? Murder the media was scratched into a door of the Capitol. Violent protesters smashed equipment and punched a photographer. The murder the media was scratched into a door of the Capitol.

Was that you? No, it wasn't. That was a sharpie. Okay, let's be real. We, you know, time or determination to go etching things indoors. That was a sharpie. Yeah, no, you're out there with a bowie knife scratching like rowing oak door of the capital. Scratch, oh, that was scratched into the door of the capital with a sharpie marker. So, technically, you know, it's a tiny bit of,

there's some material removed, right? Wow, did you think at the time when you were riding it with a Sharpie on the door of the Capitol that this might be, it's like a serious crime, like serious repercussions for this? Absolutely not. Like, I know it sounds stupid now, but yeah. Like I covered a lot of riots, you know what I mean?

This was not the most hectic day i've been a part of yeah this whole time that the thought doesn't cross your mind that this can ever be taken seriously because it doesn't seem like a serious event and to be real honest the fucking wasn't so uh... you know we have been a goofy fun we uh... film some people have been goofy fun some people took it kind of seriously and you know what happened. Yeah. Wow. Two capital riders who smoked inside the cap. You smoked inside the capital. That's badass. Yeah. I'd like to think I'm the most photogenic of the day. We had a pretty

classic picture. I did my cigarette inside. Let me see. Let me try to find the picture. Oh, you'll find it. It should come up pretty quick. Okay, Nicholas, let's go here. Okay, so, um, to keep telling you stories, sorry, I interrupted with this skipping head. No, yeah, so, uh, we go in there, we film, and then to be clear, the mood outside the capital is very different than the mood inside the capital. People look back on this as, you know, just, uh, outside the Capitol is very different than the mood inside the Capitol. People look back on this as you know just the most devastating thing never happened to friendly liberals in America, but once people moved into the building it was just good moods and high fives all around, you know. In fact, I think I got in trouble for high fiving somebody. They mentioned that. I was on TV. The whole thing's filmed, of course, you know. Yeah. So that was on TV the whole thing still in the course you know yeah so that was that no important they end up reading back to uh

it's we can't be excused by being humorous because our jokes are really what inspired people to to go on to their own misdeeds so you can't take it easy on our duty asus wow so what did they actually get you on? What was the charge? Oh, yeah, very specific law. Now this is interesting. I'm starting in the games, 1512, parentheses, see what this is is a little paragraph under a parentheses under a saying and a statute or whatever. It's under witness intimidation, right? So as a 20-year penalty, I'll have a face in 20 years here, it's like you go find a juror and say you better not,

you know, vote the wrong way from my mob boss. They added this on in 2000. They got you on mob laws? Baaak! Basically, yeah, but really it's interrupting a meeting, okay? But they're tacked on to witness intimidation, if that's how you get 20 years out of it, right? Yeah, that's horrifying They're looking at it But they they tacked us on in 2009 after all the in-run guys went to jail and what the law says is that shredding papers is the same as interrupting meeting is the same as Intimidating a juror a witness or whatever So it's it's a real like

Goldberg machine of law that I fall victim to and some say it won't hold up in appeals court. I can't appeal my case, but you can. You can. Somebody is right now. You can't appeal your case. I feel guilty because, you know, I was I was taken into court and they said, well, we'll just give you the other charges. You better plead guilty.

So I did. That's all that works. Dude, isn't that crazy that they can like, they can extort you into pleating guilty? Like, baked Alaska, went in front of the judge and you remember he said like, well, I'm not guilty, but I have to say it to take the plea. Yeah, that's what I'm saying now. See, I said that after I said that.

Hey, Connie, come on in. Have a seat, have a seat. Yeah, like, shouldn't that be, I mean, isn't that illegal? Like trying to coerce your behavior by threatening you with more jail time? Even in spirit, they shouldn't be allowed to say, like, oh, we're gonna use the government

to just send you to prison forever, unless you just go ahead and confess. Yeah. That's not what works. That's not just like the political bias of now. It's just like how the feds this and works, you know? Yeah. Okay, so go back to, go back to the before,

when you're getting ready to go in the capital, before you've actually written on the car of Dint of the Door with a Sharpie, murder the media, what happens happens uh... walk us through it all is going to jail this guy's going to jail for four years he's he's stormed and then he's one of those people yet get on the ponies here are news uh... very lovely

newsgirl uh... but no walk us through it please yet so i we walked up and we see the crowd getting agitated. It's really just a bunch of, I call it angry dads. You know, everybody's talking about, was it a secret, right wing plan, you know, hint, fucking no? Was it actually antifa infiltrating and pulling the strings from elsewhere? No, it's not. It was just a bunch of angry dads who discovered very quickly

that the cops aren't actually on their side and they took it kind of hard and the cops took it a lot harder and went just in on the crowd. And in my humble opinion, they just didn't need to and that said it all. That's the real deal. Yeah, it was wild watching conservatives learn

in real time that the cops aren't their friends and like the love the worship of them is not reciprocated. I don't know who but somebody got in trouble for hitting the cop with a semblu line flag. Okay, so when did you when did you write on the door number one and then what was it like when you got inside because thought, I don't even know if I could say this actually, but I thought the whole day was hilarious. Like, I think the funniest thing that ever happened, like I assume the Boston Tea Party was really funny with dressing up like Indians and just throwing goods in the ocean. That was pretty funny. But I think this, it's got more comedy value, doesn't it?

Yeah, yeah. So what was it like? when did you when did you decide to write? I'm erasing. I'm erasing the media on the media. I think I think we did that way out I don't I don't remember the exact secrets of that crime, but I'm pretty sure that was on the way out so you know We went in we didn't break in or nothing like that We just walked in through an open door and I remember get going in We saw somebody had broken a window previously and And that was very surprisingly. We were surprised at

even escalating to that point. Yeah. Yeah. We walked in, we have our cigarettes, we have our look around, some points, some cobastic, you know, you're going to get out of here and we say, yeah, actually, and then we did a few minutes later, went and got beer and pizza, had a ton of great footage, and then go home and edit and make it even funnier, which wouldn't take too much effort. And, you know, I fly back to Hawaii where I was living at the time, hop off the plane, and the FBI grabs me up real quick. I think that was the first one to be arrested, period. But again, I'm fellowogenic. Yeah, you are. I'm looking at your pictures

of you smoking in the capital right now. Yeah, those pictures go hard. Yeah, they do. What do you think, Pawnee? You remember these guys? You see them in the news? Maybe Instagram. The two nicks, maybe Instagram.

Yeah, you and your body, you kind of got like a hundred-s Thompson and his lawyer vibe here, right? Here's you in the front. Here's your watermark MT media. I assume murder the media Yeah So, brother follow us on telegrams only but you're so welcome Nick the guy we're talking to is this guy in the middle already the handsome one All right, this is and now I've got I don't know maybe you're in this one. It's like a big mob of people going through Oh, yeah, here's a circle of you going in. So what did you do when you got inside? Oh, don't shouldn't smoke. Yeah.

What did you what did you want to do? Like what was your goal of going in there? What were you thinking? Because I'd be kind of like afraid, you know, I kind of fuck. All right. Well, if I'm gonna go in here, like am I gonna do something crazy? Yeah, what was the objective? To crush democracy with our bare hands. Oh, okay. Well, the goal is to fail. Yeah, I know. I'm not going to think I won, but we just go and film crazy things that happen, which it was no different that day. And didn't seem different, you know, even afterward, it was just, well, you know, glad we were around to see that crazy bit of order. And of course, some folks took it pretty hard.

So the FBI picks you up and then what? Like what is the FBI? What's getting picked up by the FBI? Like turn her down. Oh, you know, everything they still have some of my stuff. Like I remember they stole my murder immediate t-shirt, which is just a picture of a bear doing cocaine so I got one I guess the proof I was there. I love it. But yeah they take your phone obviously you know that stuff throw you in a surprise in the affordable car takes us whatever FBI building there is and and a Y out there in the Booneys, they, you know, very friendly,

try to make friends, you know, hey, you're not zero marine, I was marine too. You wanna talk to us? Uh, no. No. No. You wanna talk to us about how you walked into this building and smoked?

You motherfucker. Yeah. What are you doing? It's so fucking dumb. Yeah. You find the paper, whatever. You don't want to talk about a lawyer and tell us and basic stuff.

I think I told him I was identified as a black transsexual because I do that for all government forms. And, uh, cool. Yeah. You know, I probably could have got to women's prison if I wanted. I've been very faithful for that for the years, but didn't go that wrong. Don't you think they should have a women's prison that's just hot women? Like I think it's isn't it kind of bullshit that the hot women have to go to regular women's prison? Pony. Yeah, I thought movie about that once. Yeah, you wouldn't want to go to

regular women's prison, right? I would. Oh, why? Because that's where I would have power. If I go to a hot women prison, then I'm just like everybody else. You think you're gonna have power in the regular women's with those bruises, walking around? Why do you think that? I'll pick the biggest girl and I identify as a woman now. Okay, sorry, Nick. So the FBI is trying to like good cop you, basically. Yeah, yeah, it's what they do whatever.

I'm not like, I'm not gonna do that, obviously. So I decline to continue the conversation and they say, all right, well, get a prison. So the bomb makes it to the conversation. Yeah. And we say, all right. Well, go to prison. So the bomb makes it. When did you plead guilty? Oh, like, when did you know you were fucked? Because when I went in at first happened, it just seemed like they want. I know, like, I called this early. I don't say it public, but I was figured like four years is because I'm in the right wing

You know Dispended world and when we fuck up a little bit you get fucked up a lot like that's that's known, you know So it was there's never a mystery where this is going. That's yeah. I'm not standing here wide I'm like we know what it is. Yeah What it was Go ahead What it was the they threw me in prison and Honolulu for a week on a trust asking charge, which is all I had then. That was fun.

So you shredded documents? Is that what they got? No, you're on. That's what they got me. I guess that's why it's been challenged in court you're like you're resting people under a subset of like witness intimidation for sharing documents but no one did that and so it's it's in the appeals for right now I don't know what that means to me like if they say it's not good I don't know if I just like go through or they started over I have no idea I probably Google that but I don't think you're going to be, I got fat news. No, if they strike it down, like, the charge I have is not, like, it would definitely change

my situation. I just, I'm really a total lawyer. Wow. Wow. You know, and if the field court doesn't go for it, many are saying that the Supreme Court ain't going to have that business, but, you know, we'll see. They even hear the case and we'll see what the appeals court says. So who knows? Who knows? how long are you going in for?

I'm not a decent fucker like Say it again. How about that? How long are you going in for? Four years four years. Oh, that's a good time. Learn some Spanish. Get Jacked. Write a book. Yeah, but you know, Learn some Spanish. Yeah, that's what I would do.

If you went to prison after you fucked the the big girl then you just learned Spanish yeah four years she's lying And get jacked are you gonna get jacked while you're in prison Nick? Why not I hear that's the thing to do, you know, I write a book. I'll read it Yeah, I've got it. Well, you know? Write a book. I'll read it. Yeah, I've got it. Well, you know, people are not a few things. I'm not going to reveal any projects I'm on the week. We got some stuff in the works

and you have not heard the last of either of us. Speaking of which, I did offer you to hear from my toldestinit who has been here. And I'd like to hang up. Yeah, I'm letting my five was going to be a little bit of a call in. Yeah, let me, I don't know if I can add both of you to a call. Tell them to call in right now, and I'll see if I can, I'll either answer it or it'll hang up on you. I don't know which. All right. Well, whichever spot I won't be offended.

Okay. Yep. Well, I think what's I think what's being done is terrible. I don't think there's any sort of, I don't think there's any like the spirit of the law, it behind it at all. I think obviously what you guys did is just have a good time in the cap at all. I took a cap at all. We got a little mischief. I won't nod a little bit of mischief, but it's, we scared people who have a lot of power

and we understand that. We know exactly what it is. That was the best part. The best part was how terrified they were. That was what made it so funny. They said that in court. They also didn't praise it as the best part. Sorry. The funniest part is how afraid they were.

Should be. They used to teach that they should be, that the government should be afraid of us. And now they're punishing it, even saying it. I remember that, yeah, that was like, that was the mainstream thing. And all these, you know, you're, when you get my situation as many people are, people watching the day off,

I think we're much more enthusiastic and they work the media got their ears you know and people also so tragic and terrible i've known you my whole life you don't fucking love congress or right never yeah like this yeah uh... you know

like nobody loses their mind if like bomb threats get called into schools all the time and people are like, oh, that's, you know, don't do that. That's like they make jokes about it. But this, which is. Oh, forget bomb. People bomb the Capitol. You remember that? Bill Clinton tarted the woman that bombed Congress. Like that happened. Yeah. And there's all kinds of, you know, in 2016-2019, left is stormed in the same building. And they were open. We get to stop the politics happening in the federal building. We have to do that.

And then they all got $50 fines, charges, just mess. We know what the score is. I feel like that's what they should do. Every time there's a new election, we should just have a ceremonial storming of the capital and smash it all in that burn it. Just to let some steam off, you know? Like the losers. The losers going and just smacking,

like, ah, you know, fuck you. And then it's like, all right, we're gonna build it back. I mean, it's just, it's our money anyway. That's what I'm told, you know? Okay, let me try to add this guy. Oh yeah, merge, call, here we go. This is the other Nick, right? Yes, this is the other Nick Nick too

Hello, hello Can you hear us? Hello. Hello Hello, hello. Hello. Hello. Uh-oh He's got a problem. Hello Yeah, it's uh,, you ain't here. I know. Yeah. I know he or nothing.

Do you have any, do you have any strategies for dealing with prison? Like are you worried about the rape? Oh, wait. No, not really. I mean, look, I think it's a way overblown thing. I think it used to be worse. For one, there's like, there's gays in prison. All right.

I don't think they're going to have problems. They've got to go catch me. Yeah. So people who do that stick to themselves and, you know, it's, I'm not too worried. I take care of myself, whatever it's, we'll be all right. Well, shit, man. I just can't, I cannot imagine. Are you going to serve all four years?

They let you out after like two for good behavior. You're gonna call into a show where I came in here anything right now. I'm gonna put my focus on this. Uh-oh, who's he talking to? Oh, I don't know, probably me. Hello. Yeah.

Oh, I don't hear anything. I think she's a big prank. I'm gonna call into something. I ain't gonna. I'm gonna call into something. I'm gonna call into something. I ain't gonna anything. I think it's a big break. I'm gonna call it a something. I know it works because it's working for you. I'm gonna tell him we can hear you want air. He's nothing cat-mai you see foods. Is he muted? Or like... Did he mute us, do you think? You see for the hamper, hamper? Yeah, let me call into the last remaining cameark.

I'm in one person working. I'm in the business. I'm in the business. This is a special on aisle 12. Hello. Hello. So don't you're on foot. Hi. I'm Hello. So, don't try on, Fred. Hi.

I'm going to try call, I don't know if y'all hear me, but I can't hear you. Yeah, I'm going to try calling in again. Okay. All right. Good luck. Yeah. Do you think it's going to get better now? Do you think the show trials and like the political persecutions are going to get worse or better?

No, I'm worse, 100 percent. I thought into it. Yeah. Me too. I don't really think there's any kind of constitution left anymore to be honest. No, well, no, there is. It's just used in one direction. You have right wingers to say the constitution is the most important document with this is what makes our country different.

But you know what the Constitution doesn't say, it doesn't say you can't uh, sex change children so we can't, you know, we can't stop that. But the left is, they will use the Constitution anyway they please and whatever the rules want for us, it's easy enough to do. So uh, yeah, you might say I'm a bit jaded on that subject. Oh, I think you could be much more jaded. Okay say I'm a bit jaded on that. So, I think you could be much more jaded. Okay, I'm trying to merge the calls again. Here is he here. Next. All right, let's try this again. Let's try it again. Hello. Can you hear us?

Oh, geez. Not hearing anything on this one. Yeah. Oh boy. You know, it has like a tester, like a audio tester. Hey buddy, I'm live on the air. Can you hold off on the guitar? In prison this calls this is gonna cost like $4 a minute. I don't want to hold the airtime. He's got your fans in the store. I'm not saying anything. Nick, thank you for calling in.

Before I go, if I could, could I just, this has been disrupted in my life and cost me everything. I do have a fundraiser on GiveThemEgo. If you want to look up the OCEF Family Fund that's OCEHS Family Fund on GiveThemEgo. Here's nothing. I'm going to hang up. You talk to me the car. I'll see y'all later. I thank you Nick. Good luck. So I can save in that in that dialogue. Okay. Okay. Boys. All right. I don't think his call is going to work. That's okay.

Right? All right. Let me mute this. Just get out of it. Okay, Pony. Four years, wow. Yeah, what do you think about that? Damn. You think that's not enough? Mm-hmm. Just a silly reason to go to prison for four years. Going into the capital.

Yeah. And like, walking around. Yeah. Smoking walking around. Smoking a cigarette. Yeah. Do you think that proved anything? Smoking a cigarette? Like inside the capital. Like I'm all four going in for a good cause or like a good reason. If you proved something, if you like made a difference. Yeah. I think that. I think that it did show them that they can still be afraid of us, which is why I think they're gonna get such enormous penalties. Okay. Then it's for good cause.

Yeah, because if they did it in like a, if they actually planned to actually take over the government, all those guys would just need to be armed. And then it's like, oh, well, oh, you guys actually can't do anything if we did that? Shit, we didn't know that. This is just a bunch of guys armed with cell phones. Well, how about the army? Well, like, don't they have more guys like cops?

Yeah, but who are they gonna support? In an instance like this. Like that guy was a military guy, former veteran. Right, former. Former, yeah, former military guy. Keyword former. Yeah. But when you're in, you don't really like have an opinion.

In the army? Right, yeah. I don't know, they have. But you can't go against the government. Like the penalty for that is massive. His death. Yeah, it's treason. Is it death?

Yeah, treason is one of the things. Just like your opinion doesn't matter. But the army has been known to rebel from time to time. Yeah, for the last couple thousand years, every once in a while they'll go, eh, you know what? Fuck you. Fuck you. You're an asshole. I hate you. How are you? I'm good.

This is the only time I've ever said this to a woman, but you've changed your hair and I love it. Did I? Yeah, you're all, you're much darker. It's darker. Yeah, it's darker. Yeah, but it's just a toner. It's like no, because I used to be a blonde for so long and like the blonde just like creeps out. So I have to like tone it or whatever, do you don't care? Oh no, I care. I'm hanging on everywhere to point you saying. Can I have one of your waters? They brought in? What's up for you?

Oh, you did? Yeah. Yeah, so much. All I have is this seltzer, this rainbow shirt, but I need to know today, today, you're gonna need this. Oh my God, move in please. And there was like the worst traffic coming in here.

Like what's going on? Is it because of Christmas? Yeah, it is, is it World Cup? Does everyone have soccer fever? In LA? No, World Cup ended already. And it was between France and Morocco. And I don't know who won.

I just know it was a crazy game. I think France won. Oh, they did? I think so. No, I mean Argentina and France. I think France won. Really? they did? I think so. No, I was, I mean, Argentina and France. I think France won. Really? Yeah. So you went to the World Cup. I did. I went to Qatar like three weeks ago. I was it. It was good. I went to see we were actually originally supposed to go to this game today. The final game. Yeah. And then my brother was supposed to come from Iran, right? So he goes,

let's go to an Iran game. I was like, okay, let's go to Iran and USA, right? So that I'll be happy either way. But then he was like, no, I don't really care about that. Let's go to Iran, UK. So we're like, okay, we change our ticket, we get Iran, UK. He dips out of the plant. He doesn't come. I'm not going to church. He dips out of the world cup plate. Yeah, it's okay. He got married. So I guess that's what level of wealth is this that you're like a guy dips out on a chicken wing night and I'm like, okay, but dipping out on a world cup trip to the most in demand

sporting event on the planet. It's a guy took my two cousins and so we go we go to Qatar and Iran just absolutely got raped just brutally raped. Yeah. Six, two. Oh, I won't point. I went to the bar to get a drink and in that time they scored two. They scored two goals when you had drinks.

Yeah. It's a shame that you would have to get yourself a drink. I would never let that happen. Kevin. This is terrible. I would tackle you. Get back to your seat. I'll get your woman. I'll get the drink.

I'll just you. How was it? How was guitar? Did you do any fun gay protesting all you were there or anything like that? You see guys get killed. So yeah, so like two days before the first game starts, Katar says there's no alcohol. Oh yeah, that's right. Right.

So talk about bailing on the last minute. Are you fucking kidding me? No, it's like so not cool. Like everyone's already got their ticket, everyone's already in. And like it's a dry country to begin with, but they said like you can have beer, right? So we're like, okay, fine.

So literally two days before, and I read somewhere that more than 40 or 50,000 people like gave their tickets back. And I asked her, they were like, yeah, fuck this. What's the point? So anyways, we got alcohol though. How'd you get it? Black market.

Black market liquor. Did you get it? Did you get it?. Black market liquor. Did you get it? Did you get it? Did you get it? Did you get it? Did you get it? I was just like bath tub gin. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, or whatever, they bring it back. We got like a tequila and vodka and a jack Daniels. So it's permanently stuck in high school there?

Yeah. Yeah, the whole country stuck in high school. That's awesome. Did you drink in high school? Yeah. Did you party in high school? Not really. No.

I think I had my first drink in 16, so yeah, that's high school. Yeah. Okay. But I wasn't like a partier or a drinker. Were you concerned that you'd be like stoned for, like, stoned to death by rocks for drinking in a... No, you don't get stoned to death for that. Oh, you don't?

Yeah. You get stoned to death while the reason is not kidding. You don't, you don't, they don't do that anymore. That's you didn't even got officially. Were you worried about getting caught for, like I was in Abu Dhabi with my friend works for NYU there, I think and Is that right NYU I think so your university? Yeah, they have a

Abu Dhabi has so much of our money that they have franchised things that you didn't think could be franchise Uh-huh like NYU they have a Louvre that they called the Louvre 2 Like literally. Okay. It's just sick. It's a worse, one of the worst experiences of my life. There you go. I went to Abu Dhabi. Yeah, I went to Abu Dhabi. I went to the Louvre 2. How was Louvre 2? It is a, it's like a giant turtle shell on the ocean, like the most beautiful giant, like an alien spaceship. You're like, this is the majesty of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The terrifying part of his would abuse me with this epic feeling of like, you know, whatever

that is. And then they've got a, they've got a mummy, like a full mummy at the beginning. And then they've got that Napoleon on the whole like the whole thing is like the like meme pictures that you see in the museum. Okay, but it's just like it just reeks of like you just you guys just bought this. Yeah, I know that you just like why couldn't you why did you have to call it to Louvre 2? Like that was the worst part. Yeah, it Just call anything else. What are you trying to prove? Yeah, you proved it. I hate it.

Thank you. It's horrible. Yeah. Well, how did the Louvre 1 get their stuff? Hitler, I think. I'm pretty sure. Wasn't it? Yeah, didn't need to take all the art and stick it in.

So they bought it, but they took it. Who? So like the ones in France, they took it. Yeah, I thought it was, I swear I thought it was Hitler. He ran it up all the art and then he like, that was the whole point of Inglorious bastards, right? Yeah. That's the whole movie.

Yeah, then he killed, then he killed Hitler. Mm-hmm. And then they took it, the good guys took it and just, they're like, well, we can't figure out who owned this shit, so we're just gonna keep it. Yeah. Okay, I've never been to France. Have you ever been to France?

No. I think it's a hell hole now. Is it? Yeah, it used to be fun. It was gonna be nice, please. I was thinking to go. But anyways, so yeah, Qatar was cool, but like just a lot of restrictions.

Just like a bunch of rules for no reason, you know? Like there's just like a shit ton of rules, which is very similar to my country. Like the rules make no sense, but they're just rules, right? Yeah. But you can't do this like why? No, you just can't. We don't even know why. Like why?

Like you just can't. So many like, um, there are so many. So like at the end of our trip, we had extra bottles that we didn't want and we wanted to give it to the front desk of our hotel so that they can give it to our friend who lives there. And they were like, no, we can't. We can't do that. Like why? We just can't hold out all year.

Like, okay. No, but this was actually in Dubai. We went to Dubai after Qatar. And so they just like, all the Islamic countries just have like random, there were so many, I can't think of them off the top of my head, but there were so many moments where you're just like, but like why?

And there's just like no reason for that. I was constantly afraid the whole time I was there, like I'm gonna fuck something up and just go directly to jail, like midnight express. Like there's no way I can function here. Thinking the things that I'm thinking and be allowed to walk around. Yeah, going in my friends and my family,

they're like, Pony, please don't go to jail here. Just please don't say anything, don't do anything. So they're like really, like for women, they have such like strict rules as to like what you should wear in that. I agree with. So the first night where they wear like the tiniest top and I'm like, let's go out.

How tiny, what do you mean, tiny? It's like showing a little cleavage, a little belly. A little bit. A little bit. It's tinier than that top you're wearing right now. Yeah, it's a sweater. Oh, that is a sweater. It's very covered.

All right, that's practically a Christian housewife chased sweater that you're wearing. Like all the women looked at me like, like they were so offended. And I was just like, baby, baby, this is what freedom was. Why are you doing this in the Middle East of all places? I wanted to. You see why they have these laws? You guys just can't. You're like the woman, like you ever seen a guy

that goes to a bar with his girlfriend, his girlfriend's always like picking fights with guys, and then he's got to fight them. Oh, yeah. That's you, but it's with an Islamic caliphate. No, but I fight my own fights. I don't know. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no'm like, no. No, but I fight my own fights. No, no, no. I don't throw someone else in.

Yeah, they all say that. All right. Um. Yeah. Well, I was very jealous of all your pictures. Oh, yeah. But then I heard they stopped to be here and I was like, ah, I can't even. Yeah, I can't be jealous of that.

Okay, can you read some news? Let's do it. For us. Was that amazing four years some news? We'll do it. For us. Was that amazing? Four years for walking around. That's insane. That's ridiculous, man. All that for protesting smoking laws.

Yeah, right. I was in there smoking to protest. How did they get caught? Well, cause they're posting selfies like this. The whole thing is higher time. Why would they do that? Because they wanted to be caught. No, they just thought they were covering like a news event.

Like they're, they're, their news guys. They got caught through the selfies they posted on social media. Oh, that's got to feel so down. Well, they were there covering a major news event. Yeah. Except for the writing with the sharpie on the thing. Oh, okay. So they were working for themselves.

What do you mean? I know, nobody hired them to go. Like they were like a newscaster. They're an independent media organization called Murder the Media. It's wrong with that. Sounds legit. All right. Students banned from taking photos of trans teacher with Z-size prosthetic breasts. Z-size. How big is that? I'm so glad

you asked. You haven't heard of this woman? No. Z-sized prosthetic. Static. Press. Just don't tell me, don't. Don't sit over my shoulder. Tell me how to Google. Okay. This is what she looks like.

Oh, Jesus Christ. That's gonna be. You're all amped up with feminism because you came back from the Middle East. And I like, no man tells, no man Googles without me. What do you think about that? This is a shop teacher. Well, how did she get her job as a teacher

is what I wanna know. Cause she's the best damn wood shop teacher that ever... She doesn't wear a bra, so you can like see her giant nples poking through. Well, she could sand those off if she wanted. The wood shop, right? Yeah, one accident. That's all I can say.

She's wearing a matching mask. There's no need to wear a bra, because they're fake. Why? I want to talk to her. You know, as a therapist, I want to talk to her and see how did this start. Well, you're going to try to trick her out, trick her out of dressing like this. Is it a him?

Is she a transgender? Oh, yes, sorry. A trans. This is the kind of confusing times where a living in you always have to wonder, is it a him or is it a her? No, it's funny. This is a man wearing this. No, shut up.

That's the thing. Yeah. Well, you think a woman would do something this funny? No. Are you kidding me? Wait, so I'm soaking. Yeah, this is a guy shop teacher in high school wearing these gigantic fake watermelon strap on tits. Oh, it's a strap on, it's not real. Prostetic. These are just, it's just like a, this is like a harness

that this dude puts on and then goes and teaches class with these giant tits. Keep reading, please. Students at a Houghton School District have been threatened with suspension for taking photos of a teacher's massive chest or blonde wig. Oh, it's a wig. But video circulated last week of the teacher walking on crutches with a cast on her right foot, Lemukes, who previously went by Carrie Lemukes, made headlines after photos circulated of her skydiving

with a porn star. She was not injured on the landing, but has been away from school for weeks for safety reasons. She had those big tits on while she was skydiving. They fucked up her gravity. Through the center of gravity. Sorry going to the spin. Yeah. Bonnie, have you ever heard about women complaining about their back

when they have big tits? Yeah. But then this guy never complains. Wait, why? I am women who complain about a lot of you complain about back problems because my back always hurts. I have to carry these bad boys all the time. You see that eye contact that I had the entire time.

How hard was that? Francis said the district has a policy that requires students to obtain permission before capturing using and transmitting images or video. Oh, they have a policy that have a policy. Why why why is she working at a school? What is happening? Why aren't all of them doing this? Why isn't every male teacher putting these gigantic tits on? What's fucking with us? I hope so, right? Could you, man, did you have anything like this in high school when you were in high school and you teachers like that? No, fuck no.

Our teachers just had bad breath. Never took like that. I don't know the breath smell of it in my teachers. This odd that. You know what they would get like a really close to you? No, no. No, Single teacher got close to me ever Like step away please Anyways so many fucking pedophiles. It's just a scourge, you know

I can't I can't what that do you think he wears it around she wears it around the house? You think she just gets home because like takes them off I never wish you could do that with your tits. It's the same when you open your bra. That's what it feels like Oh, thank God. The day is over. Yeah, it's time for the couch now Yeah, nothing is getting done when the once the bra comes off. Oh really? Yeah, then you just lounge around. Yeah play with your tits That's how I feel. Is that what you do? Yeah, I get on a long day.

Yeah, pop my briefs off. Unraveled. I never met you by the way, what's your name? Kevin. No, you've met him before. He's a guy that's always here. Yeah, you're never here. Yeah, he's the audio engineer.

I've never met him. I grew up here. What? Have you ever met me? Yeah. You liar. Okay, what's the next story? Brussels.

Trans activists throw feces during a vent, critical of gender ideology. Cool. A group of trans activists disrupted a talk by child psychiatrist Caroline Eliashov and professor Saline Massend because the door to the venue had been left unlocked. 20-hooded activists dorm into cafe, luck, and through garbage and cattle feces throughout the room.

They screamed obscenities and tried to attack speakers, a mess in an Elias chef. I hope I'm saying that right. The violent interruption of the talk in this instance appears to have been solely motivated by the appearance of mess in an Elias chef who are frequently referred to as transphobic and called TERFs.

An acronym for Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminist, often used in a Draugatory Fashion. Trans activists have used waste to protest in the past, including leaving bottles full of human urine around the perimeter of the Equality and Human Rights Commission and spring urine at women's rights campaigner Kelly J. Keane. God. Wow. Trans people are really getting wild with poop. Yeah.

So this is the shot of it. This is the excrement. Does it look like? Does it look like Fesis? Yeah. If it's cattle, it's like dry. Dry Fesis. I don't really feces. Yeah, if it's cattle, it's dry. Dry feces? I don't really care about that.

Like when you go hiking, that's kind of what it looks like, no. Yeah, it kind of does. Do you think it would have made it, it would have been a more effective protest if it was like human feces and like fresh? Yeah. Plus, you could probably throw it better. Looks like you just sweep that up and call it good. Yeah, I think that would be easier to throw. You think this? Yeah. Plus you could probably throw it better. Looks like you just sweep that up and call it good. Yeah. No, I think that would be easier to throw.

You think this? Yeah. But it like disintegrated. What do you eat? Maybe that might be I should be asking that. What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet?

What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet?

What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet? What's your diet? I can't. Do you self-ass, racquetball sized, you know, put it in a chucket, one of those dog things? What does that do really though? Like who goes? It expresses their displeasure. But it's kind of like the people that are just throwing soup at beautiful paintings

at museums now, it's like, what exactly does that do for you? Yeah. Like how is this your way of proving your point? Yeah. It's a shitty way. No pun intended. Yeah.

What do you think they should do? Get over it. We're talking about it. We're talking about like the soup painting thing. Yeah, get a really large group of people who agree with you and start a respectable campaign and just start like talking to people in a logical way. They can't do that though because all their ideas are retarded. So maybe you should be the one changing your mind about this. I actually like that when they deface

artworks. I hit it. You hate it. Why? Because it's like, this is why we can't have nice things. You know? It's already behind Lexan. Yeah, it's behind like Plexiglass too. Well, the really nice ones are. Yeah. But like as like... Dog shit ones, you say?

Not even dog shit, but like just like a really beautiful painting that's like obviously worth nothing. Because it's priceless, right? Yeah. But it's just not like, it's not being protected by some glass. Like those are the ones they go after. They're like, they're like, I thought they were going after the famous ones that had like loose sight in front of them.

Yeah. No. No. No. I've seen the ones that, I've actually all the ones I've seen, like the soup is directly on the painting now. Like there's no glass. The ones I've seen, it wasn't all like on a glass, right?

Cause that wouldn't really enrage you. Right? Cause that you would just clean the glass. I thought that guy that super glued his head to it. Did you see that? His head. Yeah. You know what they should do?

They should just do nothing about it. Just let him shed himself for days. Make an example out of them. Why would you come and help them? Let them be glued to the wall? I've been saying this for my entire life. Why would you help these people? Like, seriously, why? All of them. They did that with the same group of people in like the Mercedes Museum and like Germany. They like superglue themselves and then they just kind of left them for like two days and just like occasionally like They're like super glue themselves and then they just kind of left them for like two days and just like occasionally like bowl of water. Why? That I mean they didn't like help them. They just did Don't bring anything to that. Just literally let them be there forever. Yeah, it'll add to the value of the museum because now there's a skeleton I just put a little plaque right now That would be that would be funny if some if you were a museum I just put a little plaque right now. Exactly. It's landing with it.

That would be funny. If you were in a museum, I was at the Chicago Art Institute last week or two weeks ago. I did a shitload of acid and went to the museum, which is a big mistake. But impressionist paintings, I've never heard this before. I hate doing like the, like have you tried this, but on weed, the impressionist paintings on acid were like constantly like moving, highly recommended.

If you run out of things to do on acid, then go to a museum, go to an impressionist. Anyway, yeah, if there was a guy, can you imagine getting dragged to a museum, and there's a guy gluing his face on? I think that would be great. You just walk up and sock the shit out of it. Like you have to, right?

For the art, for the art of it, the cruel defense of that is like, you're honor. The artistic merit of a guy trying to deface a painting and his face getting buck and socked by me. You're increasing the provenance of his peace by doing that. And his activism. Yeah. Who should we write to? Because I'm so down the next time someone does this,

leave them there. You gotta infiltrate their group. Let's do it. Let's see when they're next. I can't infiltrate it. My shoulders are too big for them to believe that I like the earth That I hate oil

Yeah Anyway anyway Alright trans activists are throwing poop all over the place and soup That's cool What do you think of trans activism? There's the war the women now women are trans people are fighting, right? Yeah, just like anything else, I feel like there's always extremes and you don't want to be there and the answer is like somewhere right in the middle. I feel like we went from one extreme of like, there is no trans, there is no one who can

like be born in the wrong body or like this, and now it's like, no, as soon as somebody identifies a way in their head. How there's no way to know. Like there's just no way to know. Like all you need to do is just think something in your head and that's like, has to be respected and valued. Yeah.

I was like, no, no. There's a little bit of science. There's, there's a little bit of science. I think it's in the middle, it's somewhere in the middle. And like, fucking children. So you could's in the middle, it's somewhere in the middle. And like, shfucking children. So you could cut like half of a kid's cock off, and that would be fine. The children part is like just absolutely enraging.

Have you seen how many girls are like cutting their tits off? They call them, I never heard somebody yesterday calling them zippertits. I really? Yeah, I was necreccata calling one. I was like, that's horrible. That's transphobic. Can't say that. Like calling one. I was like, that's horrible. That's strange for me.

You can't say that. Okay. Child. Because that's cars. You're not supposed to have surgery when you're a minor, right? Yeah. Like a health surgery is different, but like a... You can't have your nose done.

You can't have anything. So like... That's an odd example to throw. I don't know. I just don't think they should be able to have surgery that little. It's crazy. They're not able to make that decision for themselves.

Yeah. Right. But the parents. And they'll throw you in jail for denying their trans identity. Right. Uh, it's crazy. Okay.

Have you heard of Matt Walsh? Yeah, I've heard of that guy. Have you watched his documentary? No. What is a woman? No, I've watched it. It's great. Is it?

It's great. What did you like about it? Well, because he's not arguing with these people. He just goes around and has the most civil conversation with them. And he's not trying to sway them one way or another. He just has them through their own logic just kinda has them through their own logic, he traps them through their own logic, right? Like very artistically, he just leads them

into a fucking dead end, and it's so obvious that they've hit a dead end. Like they just have no way out of it. Cause he just goes on, he's like, okay, you're saying so anybody can be, what is a woman? Anybody can be a woman. Like, how would you define a woman?

Like they get enraged. Yeah. Like, what do you think is a woman? Right? Because they're like waiting for him to say something that then they can attack. But then he's like, I don't know, I'm asking you. Yeah. People get so angry.

And they run out of answers. Yeah. For what their retarded beliefs are. That's what I loved about the flat earth people. Because people would argue with them, like earth's flat, they're like, no, it's not, it's round. Okay, why? I'm like, I don't know.

I can't prove it. Yeah, I have a friend who's a flat earth earth. He's actually a really smart guy. Really? He's like in every other aspect, he's smart and he's like athletic, but then like when it comes to this one thing, it's just like, what do you mean he's smart and he's in with other things like he runs successful businesses.

Okay. Right. Yeah. Are they flat or it's related? No. Okay. He's had successful relationships, right? So it's like, I don't know.

Let's not use that as a measure of intelligence. Well, it is somewhat, right? If you can have a successful relationship, that shows some sort of intelligence. If you can like keep a partner happy for a long period of time, right? That shows intelligence. Then someone who just like can't keep anyone around them,

and never. So the number of relationships would make you smarter. I'm not saying the number. It's not a quantity thing, but it is a quality thing. Maybe you've had only one relationship, but it was for a long period of time and it was a really happy, healthy relationship. That to some extent shows intelligence, right?

All right, I mean, I don't know. I'll take your word for I'm dumb. Okay. So what's the what's the next one? A space for a space force director was investigated for wearing a what? What is that? A chart truce. Man, Keeney around colleagues and keeping a case of sex toys in the office and kept his job report says Andrew Cox, director of the Pentagon Space Security and Defense program acted like a 13 year old boy at work. His co-worker said, Cox kept a frame pair of silver glittery hot pants and an electric

green mankeenie in his office, which he showed off to co-workers during the holiday, bad Santa party. I like that. Wow. Cawks kept a gag gift, silver case in the office, and told subordinates to search Prince Albert on the internet and grab someone by the bulls and squeeze according to the report. The report detailed the 2020 investigation, which did not result in coxist's mention or termination. Instead, he became the head of the Space Force's

new space war fighting analysis center. A man, a sharp truce, I don't know, a sharp truce meant green. It's the same, is that the same as Borat forever? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what poppin' man. So he was doing a Borat and then he got, he got fired. Okay, so. Brought sex toys to him.

One of my favorite Christmas gifts to buy is the Borat Manchini. For men? Yeah. Why? It's so funny. So they put it on for you? I make him. How many guys are you getting Borad?

I was only able to get one guy to wear it. It's because he was so fucked up. How did it look? But the rest of them have it somewhere in their drawer. And that's enough for you. How many guys have you gotten Borad Mankini's for you guys. If you bought and bought at Mancini's for. Three. And you only got one to do it?

And they're all friends. Time you were in here talking about how your friend likes to peg guys. I think you guys just like humiliating men. And that's what gets you off. Why would you fill him, you humiliated? I can never say that word. Humiliated?

Humiliated. Why would I fill humiliated? If you were, yeah. If a girl bought me a weird mankeny. Why is it weird? Well, it's not functional. Why not? Because it's strapped around your shoulders and it's flimsy.

Yeah. Well, it's because it doesn't exist. It's like guys buy girls lingerie all the time. And we don't think nothing of it. But it's like the other way around. You get humiliated. You humiliated? Yeah, humiliated.

You can't say you humiliated? It's a child board. No, it's humiliated. No, it's a hard word. Hugh. Hugh. Millieated. Millieated.

Yeah. Hugh Millieated. What about it appeals to you, a guy in a, a, a, a, Borat man. It's funny. It's funny. See, that's the, guys aren't buying lingerie for women because it's funny. You have buying you like clown suits, like I'm, I'm with stupid and an arrow pointing out.

It's different. Hey, sometimes when you make a girl laugh, like, thing, you know, coming your brains out. So that's what it takes. A dumb, borat mustache and a shirt, truce, man, keeny. Sometimes. All right, hold on, I gotta go to the store. I'll be right back.

What do you tell them? Put this on, bitch. You don't even try to sell it to them, you just put it on. Can I get that? Please. I was going to say thank you. That's not how it works. That's not how it works.

That's not how it works. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. That's not how they are.

You know? I bought a beer. You never said thank you. Thank you. I don't want it anymore. For this water. Okay. What do you got next?

Okay. Arkelly denies releasing. I admitted album. Hasn't it already been? No. Yeah, got released. Our Kelly's attorney claimed that Kelly recorded the audio. Oh, yeah, I heard this.

Audio on Friday after they met, but the singer denied releasing any music and said he hoped people recognized his voice and knew that. Sony Music, which owns rights to Kelly's music, also said it was not behind the release in September. It was not behind the release. In. It was not behind the release. In September, Kelly was sentenced to 30 years in prison after being found guilty of racketeering sexual exploitation of a child and kid not being at federal trial last fall.

Is that because when you pissed on that little girl or whatever it was? Is that that guy? I actually don't really know what he did. I just know he's like, he's just too good with his fans, I think. It's like too easy to get a hold of. I guess his music good. Arkelly? Yeah.

It's good enough to piss on little girls, I guess. How good. If you're getting away with shit with 14 year old girls your music's pretty good Elvis Jerry Lewis our Kelly who held Gary Glitter. Yeah, da da da da da da da. Hey. Yeah, I just heard his one song That he says real talk You know that song no real talk. No, let me see if I can find it. Here goes the monetization. R Kelly, real talk. This one?

Mm. The lyrics is... I decided to do this shit, uh, real talk on YouTube because I did. I did. This is a great, broken film. We're gonna do it. I'm doing this for the fan. Yeah

Real tall This gets this lets you piss on little girls this shit real tall Is this seriously our callies When a whole club pack wait a minute let me finish when I've got the same Real tough Robert you did this I I heard you did this, I heard you did that. Don't you think I got enough bullshit? Oh, mom. Oh, my god. I am no the lyrics of this. This is just like a guy talking about it.

I can do this for the show. And then I got to eat lawn moths, bang people on Twitter. Real fun. She says her entire show they sung. Oh, my god, my girlfriend replaced the song. And I even though I've been complaining about it for a month You've been listening because you talk honey. It was coming into the studio. Oh, wow. Don't you think I got Prada? Oh my my real talk

That's retarded yeah, I'm glad he's in prison For the wrong thing, but he's still in prison Okay, what do he went in for? That song? For peeing on a girl. Peeing on a girl? How little was she? Not that big.

How old was she? I don't know, I think like 13 or 14. Maybe 15? I don't know. Let's look. I don't want to be spreading false pedophile misinformation. R Kelly. Pied.

Here, please. Direct me what to give a fuck next bridge. I can't see that for. Well, I read the words that I typed in. Girl age. Oh, 14. 14 and a half or I'm gonna need a month's count on that man. Yeah, ex. Damn. Okay, real talk. Anyways, I mean if it's a adult woman, who consents to you being on her? That shouldn't be a problem. That's not a problem. So do you have friends who are into that, friends?

I have a lot of friends who are into a lot of things. You guys get bored, you're so hot, you get bored, you need just like new sensations, right? Well, a new like arrangements in your head. Okay, so my ex has this friend who's a guy, right? I'm not revealing anything. They pee on each other in the shower like pros. He is like the most boring thing he does in bed. In bed? Yeah. That's a bad place to pee. It's like, I don't know. Right over there. Oh, I don't know. Like maybe they like set down tarps or whatever. Okay. But like, yeah,

he does some real like interesting stuff. And for some reason, he would always tell me about them. Like what? What is it for him and his friend? He was just always escalate to like new levels of just like perversion. Yeah. And he would do like 13 mullies a day on a normal day. So not very right. Not very right in the head. But one time he showed me a video, which I did not want to see. I didn't do this guy. I didn't do that.

No, no, no, he was my ex's friend. Oh, okay. So like he would like every now and then like we were like drinking whatever at 3 a.m. he would like pull out his phone and like show me a video that I absolutely did not want to see. But then I was also kind of like, interesting.

What was the video? No, so one that he showed me, he would always try new things. And I was like, how do you get women to do these things with you? Yeah. Like how do you convince someone to go to this level of fucked up with you, right? Like how do you convince someone to go to this level

of fucked up with you? And so like the video he showed me, he's, this girl is writing him and he has a plastic bag over his head and there's a plastic bag over her head and they both have their hands on each other's plastic bag suffocating each other. Hahaha. Hahaha.

Hahaha. Hahaha. How do you sell that to a girl? Hahaha. Hahaha. Well, because you have to do sell it one at a time. Like, okay, you put them. You put the plastic bag on your head.

And I just found another one. Okay, yeah. And his girlfriend was this like sweet innocent girl and like every time I would see her she just seemed like she was in so much pain like like mental like mental way. Like is he really good looking or rich or something? You can't say. Yeah, some money. What's some money? Some money. I don't know what that is. say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say.

You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say.

You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say.

You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. You can't say. I've never felt like I had a smaller dick right now. Why? That's so money. Yeah, okay, that's so money. So money. I don't know if to do that shit. Exactly.

But he was just a convincing fella. What else did he show you? Well, the funny part was, he's showing me this video and I can tell that someone's recording this. So it didn't look like he like said his phone and like it's just like record like, I'm like, who's recording?

Yeah. And I, he wouldn't answer me. And then I came to find out it was another guy that's in our group. What the hell kind of group is? Are you running in? And your ex wasn't near this weird shit. Everybody else was? Yeah, my ex was.

No, all my friends are alcoholics, but I'm not at all. Yeah, no, he wasn't. Okay. All right. Take your word for it. Okay. What's next, that's it, huh? Norwegian actress facing prison time

for the unspeakable crime of saying men can't be lesbians. Oh, you can't say that. That's horrible. Lock her up. All men are lesbians, what do you mean? Mm-hmm. How do I read that name? Tanji, I just make it up.

Tanji. Tanji. Tanji, good job,hi. Good year, John. Good year, John. Good year, John. Tonshi, good year, John. Tonshi, good year, John. A lesbian filmmaker and actress is facing three years in prison for a Facebook comment

speaking out against Christine Gentoft, a transgender woman who calls herself a lesbian mother. The actress isn't the only one criticizing Jen Toft who presents herself. Who has been in mother. She's as cry. At some point she was on lesbian. Oh, because she thought she was a woman. Or maybe she adopted. Yeah, she could, she could adopt. Maybe she was lesbian and she adopted a kid. Oh, man. Who presents himself as a lesbian and works for the trans female activist group. himself as a lesbian and works for the trans female activist group, uh, foreign ningin FRI, foreign ningin FRI. Christina Ellingsen is also facing three years in prison for hate speech.

Jive, Jive John is not backing down, is not backing down. Last year, Jive John confronted Norway's Minister of Culture and Reality, and net Treberk Stuen. To fuck that last name. Treberk Stuen. Okay. Claiming that misconstruing gender identity for biological sex has harmful implications, especially for lesbians.

We are talking about Scandinavia, where Vikings once terrorized Europe. Imagine telling Ragnar that his descendants are being prosecuted for stating men have penises. Yeah, how dare you state the fucking obvious. What, that men have penises? And men can't be lesbians. That sounds a little

As I lesbian I don't want well to get me Why should it matter because I'll just say what it's about your truth. Yeah, my truth is just getting something out of As it turns out other people feel the same, which is why this whole thing is probably bullshit. Yeah, a man identifying as lesbians and then throwing big fits when they can't go out, when they can't, have you seen that with trans women will throw big tantrums about how they're not allowed into lesbians' faces? Oh, yeah.

Is that funny? Yeah. Fucking guy. How could you possibly believe that people would lie in order to get something they want? Like, what? Yeah. Who's to me?

Why would you have to lie? I was a little like, they're playing. They worked out this whole plan of becoming trans and they got to the last moment. Like, all right, now it's time to be a lesbian. They're like, no, like, what the fuck? I'm playing fucking Philippine right at the last minute. I got kicked out of a gay sex bar in Chicago.

What did you do? Nothing. We were in there, I was in there with a couple of gay guys and my girlfriend and she was sitting in my lab. And one of our friends, a gay guy said, like, oh, you guys can't be doing that, you guys can't be doing that straight stuff. They'll kick you out.

And I said, buddy, we invented that move. We were talking about the need for a gay. But then you should have been like, no, I identify as a girl. So this is really gay activity. No, but it was gay men. Okay, then she identifies as a man. I don't want to put ideas in it. I got it.

Next thing I know. No, it's like playing their own game against them, right? They are not, they are not taking homophobia away from me. They'll be damned if I'm getting kicked out of a straight of a gay bar for acting straight. You're going to have to, I'm going to stonewall your ass here, pal. They're going to have to take every gay guy in here to drag me out and I'm gonna stone wall your ass here pal. They're gonna have to take every gay guy in here to drag me out and I'm gonna loo-up. I got news for you.

So then they said there was a room called the Dark Room. I was like, wow, what's going on in there? Dark stuff. Yeah, dark stuff. What, like, weiner's, like what do you mean? Like a weiner gauntlet, like guys, glory holes and stuff, things like you don't know. I'm like, I do want to know.

I do want to know. I do want to know. So I tried to go in there and it was all I walked in and it was dark and I just fell like this hand on my shoulder. Oh, here comes the way. And the thing you know, there was a finger in your ass. Uh, no, it was it, my own finger. And your own ass.

It kicks me out. Oh, shit. That was my fucking finger. I thought I was fingering this guy. Fucking, it was me the whole time. Uh, what an idiot. Every time. So I go in there and I'm like, all right, I don't want to see some fucking guys, Dicks.

Let's see what's going on in here. You know, check it out. Yeah, I don't care. I've seen guys sucking Dicks before. But it was too dark to see. I've seen the Simpsons having sex. Okay. You think a guy sucking another guy's dick is gonna bother me?

I've seen March Simpson naked, Lisa Simpson naked, Bart's weener, fucking homers, ding dong, hanging out. It's a different thing when it's like close to you, like right there, like what if Simpson and like his dick was like right there with you? What if Bart Simpson's dick was right out next to me? Yeah, in the dark room. I think she's pretty down. Exactly.

I think they yellow. It's different when you watch it on TV, right? Yeah. Well, I wanted to see how different it was. All right, let's get in there and I was drunk and shit. So could you see? It was too dark. It was too dark and then I got grabbed and pulled out.

I thought I was going to like a handsome man. They're like, you're too ugly for this glory hole. You gotta go to the handsome man section. He's like, you gotta get out of here. Why? Why would you say, yeah? I think you gotta be fucking kid. Exactly.

What maybe you just hadn't come out yet and you were exploring your options and then they started to get stuck. That's what I was screaming as they were dragging me out of them. Like, what if I had, you don't think like, somebody wants to convert a straight guy. They don't try to. They're serious. Yeah. What if I had like tripped and someone's dick had got into my mouth and like, what if I had, you don't think like somebody wants to convert a straight guy.

They don't care you guys. Yeah. What if I had like tripped and someone's dick had got into my mouth and like shut up, get out of here. And you were like, I loved it. Yeah, but I would have loved to be out of the view. You left a different, you all for view of the gay. I'm a straight guy who is too drunk to say no. And it kicks me out of the gay, glory hole area.

I was trying to explore my bicurious and they didn't let me. I was pissed about it all night. Yeah, I would be too. This is fucking horseshit. Kicked out of a bar because of my sexuality. I've been listening to this shit for 20 years and now it happens to me.

I wouldn't have gone without a fight. I was a little too drunk. Okay, what else you got? Here we go. Iran authorities arrest top actress. Oh, it's the stuff. Pigeon. Yeah.

Iran authorities arrest top actress way support anti-government protest. Iranian authorities don't arrest one of the contrary best non-actresses after she expressed solidarity with anti-government demonstrators. You're really good at this. All right. Yeah.

I've come a long way. Dem detain Tarane Ali Dusti. Oh, I know her. She's like a really famous actress. On charges of spreading falsehoods about deep-rotus movement, way take over the country. State media talk. For one, I need pigeon better than you read English. For one Instagram post last week, she gunned them the execution of one man over involvement

with the protests. Taranet, no for her role for the Oscar-winning film, The Seldman. Them recently take down her Instagram account, we get more than 8 million followers under Iranian law decrymed they define as creating public insecurity by threatening lives or property with a weapon. Wow. Yeah, it's like a whole lot of shit happening over there right now. See that guy got like sentenced to Execution so many yeah, yeah, did you see it on my story? Funny I have many ways

But where are you getting your Iran news? It's Iran first of all Iran. Yeah, tell me how to explain It's Edon first of all. Iran. Yeah. Don't tell me how to explain. I'm asking how to pronounce my country. Do you not have a bit on my other show where we listen to the call to prayer and then scream about Pokemon cards? Oh, right.

Have you ever heard this? Have you ever heard this? No. Let me see. This one. Have you ever heard this? Adnan? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This one. I've ever heard this. Abnon. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. Does it make you want to start like dancing around? No, this is a cult. I can Americans. Does it make, it's got a good, like, yeah, when this comes up, we all just start twerking. That's what I thought. Like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. That's what I thought. Okay, what we talking about?

This is the call to prayer. So like in Katar and Dubai, they will play this five times a day out loud from like giant speakers. It seems like. And like, you just like hear it. It's kind of like it's cool. Like, they don't do that in Iran, right? Because Iran is just like not as religious

as like Arabic countries. Oh, really? Yeah. Why? Because they're not like not Arab, we're not Arab. Islam came from Arabs, right? And Persians are not Arabs. Persians actually had their own religion.

We used to be Zerostrian, right? Got invaded by Arabs as long as got forced on Persians, which is kind of why Persians don't want to, really? Which is why they're having all these issues and all these problems with the government because they don't want to. Yeah. Right.

That makes sense. Yeah. Did you see that soccer guy? Yeah. What did he do? They're like executing something. So, like, with the whole soccer thing, and like, the reason Iran did so bad in the World Cup, because Iran's team is like extremely strong.

It's like a really good team. They've never lost this quickly in the World Cup, and they've never lost a game like 6 2. That's fair. That was the worst ever. And there's a massive reason behind that. And it's because the soccer players didn't stand up for the people and they didn't like, you know,

say things in favor of the protest. People just kind of like dissed them and they were like, we hope you lose. Like Persians didn't go to the World Cup really. So they didn't believe in the team. So the team didn't perform well. They didn't perform well. They didn't perform well. They didn't have the love and the support of people.

People weren't happy when they lost. Yeah. So it was a really twisted, sad, extremely depressing time. And then they're gonna kill some of them. Even when I went to Qatar, I didn't post about it for World Cup. Yeah. I didn't post about it.

And when people, like, just when I posted that I'm in Qatar, just like, I'm at a dinner table and I'd like, geotag Qatar, I got like a about it and when people like at just when I like posted that I'm in Qatar Just like I'm at a dinner table and I'd like geotech Qatar. I got like a bunch of DMs from people I hope you're not going to the world So I didn't post that I even went to went to the game because it's like people are very very They don't need to support the soccer team It's a win because of wearing the hijab and I get that like a lot of times when you're like so emotional and so passionate about such a big cause. Yeah. Like you have all these reasons and I get it, but at the same time you have to understand like these soccer players are celebrities and the

government has them like literally in the palm of their hands. Right, the balls. Exactly. And it's like, if you speak any words, I will kill you in your family. They're wearing a hijab of speech. Right. Right. Yeah, the whole country has fucking a job of speech.

Yeah. We don't have freedom of speech. Yeah, but don't you think like, like I've never heard a woman complaining that I have to wear underpants and pants all the time. Uh huh. Like no, a woman has ever been like, Dick should be able to not wear pants and underpants

whenever he wants outside and public. So then why do I have to be care about them wearing their hijabs? Well, it's not legal for me in the caliphate of America to walk around with no clothes on. This is a Islam's explanation. If a woman saw you but naked, they would go to each other and they would go like this.

Look at him, right? They would laugh out of being uncomfortable because of how aroused they were. However, if a woman goes in a crop top, men have a different reaction to a woman's body is what I'm trying to say, that woman do to a man's body. He, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, to a man's body. He, he, he, he, he, come here, let me fuck you. Yeah.

But still, like, basic, I'm talking about basic freedoms. Yeah. So in Islam's like, defense, they're trying to keep women safe from men, right? Or it's like, why do that? When, instead, you can teach men from when they're little boys to respect the woman's boundaries and territory and body and how you do that. Like you can like teach them in family

and in their schools. Like get in plastic with like BPC, like BPA plastics and stuff and feminize them. Sure. Better than like covering all of the women. Well, I'm all covered over here. You know? I have to wear a hijab from the waist down every day.

I'm very thankful. You laughing at the tyranny, at the oppression that I'm suffering every day. Hey, take it off. Take it off right now. No, I'm sure. Okay, thank you so much, Pony. Is it you have to go?

Yeah, I got it. Okay, get out of here, Karen. Thank you for coming. Thank you for having me. Bye. Nice meeting you, Pony. Nice meeting you. Come on.

It's just you and me, Pony. It's your worst nightmare. Happening in real time. Okay, you want to do advice and then let's end the show. Let's do it. Let me just move this a little bit. I'm moving. I like the fireplace. Oh, thank you. Is that what's a warm in here today? You never turn on the fireplace. That is why. Do you know who Nick Fuentes is? No. Do you know who Kanye West is? No. You know who Kanye West is? No. You don't know who Kanye West is. Keating. Keating. Say you're dick laughing. My ginormous pig. Okay, let's straighten you out. Your buddy Chris has been emailing

me. Really? Pull them up, please. Please. Is he a listener? Of course. Oh, God. He's a super fan. He knows me from way back before this show ever existed. Should I?

Yes. He saw him to stop. You can't tell him to stop. What did he say? Did you block him? Then he found you on every other available thing and like found your family and stuff. I wouldn't block him. Come on. I'm not responding to him either. Okay. Maybe we could just do voicemails. Christopher McCarty? Yeah, yeah, that's his name. Okay, these are the amount of emails he's sending. Okay.

Let's hear it. We're not doing advice for voicemails. We're just doing this. Okay, so for people to know how this started from the last time that I was here. Yeah. Like we had the little Skype call and then afterwards, you DMed me and you were like, what did you think of Chris? Right?

And I said, well, I think he's handsome and he has a cute accent. He seems great. That was a mistake. Not my type though. Right. Right. Right. Right.

You understand how that hurts us worse, right? When you give us compliments and then you say not interested, that's worse for us. Right. Then work on your fucking insecurity is learn to. I can't. Take a compliment and then be like, okay. I don't have time left on this earth to work on my insecurities

In fact, they compound every year they get worse because the girls get hotter and younger fact Pawnee Well, it's titled I'm upset slash hurts literally speaking my mind because like my shit is called speak your brain So he goes Pawnee I'm not happy with you. So I read this and I was like oh no I feel you're taking advantage of me for your own amusement It's true. I feel you do not care at all. I in fact don't do not care at all. I in fact don't. In reality I get a gut feeling you and Dick have sex behind closed doors and he pays you big money for it and also for hosting his show. What's big money?

You're mine, those would be big money. A couple million. No, dammit Chris. And also for hosting his show, I feel used and degraded and have been by DAX or DICK for a long time. I don't get any financial gain or Remove like your DICK DAX. Invitation? Yeah, I can't say those words.

And for me to send that message... Oh, you don't learn these words. I don't want to. And for me to send that message to you and get the sort of response I got from you, I felt was insincere and contrived. Sorry for giving you a compliment, dude. He's really sending you a big email.

I know. How can you contradict everything you said in your short message to me and say, oh, by the way, you're not my type. I told you. You can't give compliments in that same way. As if you can't be handsome and have a good accent and still not be someone's type. So you're thinking that in order for you to not be my type, you just have to be an absolute

shithole. No, I just don't want to hear a bunch of glad-hanging horse shit about how I almost made it. All the compliments give me a little bit closer to that pussy and then it's like, wham, the door right in front of me. God damn it. I just threw her me in. I'm feeling really upset and hurt right now and you too are pathetic.

Deep down, deep down, deep down I feel you have a forked tongue and dick was only being nice just to get in your pants. That's all I have to say. And yeah, I guess I'm in nothing to you, but I sure know how to express myself. Christopher, yes. I was only being nice to get into his pants.

I'm not gonna read the rest. No, I'm not gonna have your up to. Why not? Let's go to the next one, because there's like a bunch. Yeah, oh yeah, I'm sure there's a bunch. So obviously I'm not responding to him. So then the next email says, I'm not sure what reply if any I will get, but if I get

a less than friendly one, I can give it as good as I receive it. Okay. Okay. Next email. You caught me at the lowest point in my life being honest. After a math of COVID restrictions, death of my emotionally abusive mother, Dick has even taunted me for feeling suicidal, which is not cool and you don't seem to be aware of this.

That's why I don't trust you or Dick. When I want, when I want, is to feel accepted. I find it difficult to be honest about myself in that environment. Next email, by loser. How far are these apart? The time stamps. The first two on the 28th, the second one, the next day, the third one, the day after.

So three days in a row. And the last one said, and the third day says buy loser. And then one month later, which is the 29th. 29th of November, okay. He says, Pony, I don't know if you forgive me, but you don't understand how hurt I'm feeling. The next one was this morning at 10.30 AM.

Do you forgive me? Do you hate me? I feel like committing suicide. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha laugh at that, but at the same time, like it does make me sad, but I also realize that he will say anything and do anything to get attention. He's amazing. His game is peak. He is the top G on the planet. I would've said that. I would've said that. I would've said that. I would've said that.

He throws out suicide like nothing. That's how cold and calculating things. He warms on women's like emotional and empathic side. You know, like she wouldn't want me to be like her. He like brings up his like mother or like this and I like he's trying to do that thing. Yeah, he's amazing. Keep in mind he has no job. He's ugly. Oh, what are you mean?

Oh, he's threatening suicide. I have so much care and like I care about those things, especially for people, but when I know they're using it in a way to like just like weasel the way around and inside my psyche, then I'm like, yeah, I'm not good. That's what he's doing. Here, I'm going to read you some text. He text prostitutes all the time and sends me the text messages. Here's one. I'm Chris. Hi, I'm Chris. How are you? No punctuation. So it seems totally psychotic. I'm great. How can I help you?

Just wanted to say hello. I'm 45. Okay. So you don't have a booking inquiry. This is not tender. Okay. Well, if I wanted to book a beached whale at the sea, I would have done so. Amazing. Okay. How did that go? So amazing. Okay, how did that go?

She said, your details are being forwarded to the police. Why? I was just responding to your rudeness. Dude, you have thousands of reports against your name. Well, collectively, well, collectively get you sent to jail. Enjoy being ass-raped. You're wasting space, space between laughing and ass-raped, pieces shit, you're sort of acting out of purple.

Sorry. You're writing crazy, are you in your period? You know, you're getting a little crazy. It may be so emotional, women. Sorry, I didn't intend to upset you. This is after I got there a beach whale. He's a genius. He's the best pickup artist on earth, I think.

How many women is he getting, really? He fucks whores all the time because he's on government like subsidy and it's legal. That's where my tax fucking money is going. That's where you're Australian tax money. Oh, oh, Australian. Yeah, and then she sent him a picture of money. Oh, oh, oh, Australian. Yeah. And then she sent him a picture of himself and says, got you a cut. I know where you live now. The internet is amazing. Message me again and you're done. I'm sorry. I just wanted to say hello.

That's all. Not sure what I did wrong. The best way is to just not respond. But they never they like like why would you engage? I don't know. Why do you why do you want to engage constantly? It's like you know he's been reported. You've seen his name like don't respond. Don't waste exactly. Don't waste the energy.

They always do. And then he will fuck her. No, yes. It's a hooker. Well, is he paying them? Yeah. Oh, that's why. That and that. They always do and then he'll fuck them and then he will fuck her. No. Yes. It's a hooker

Well, is he paying them? Yeah, oh, that's why that and that's why they're responding, you know Because they probably deal with so many sickos all day every day. Yeah, right. Yeah, I used to it Okay, that's been the Dixiajo Patreon.com slash Dixiajo Pony plug your stuff my Instagram is ad Pony It's been the Dixia O Patreon.com slash Dixia O Pony. Plug your stuff. My Instagram is at Pony, simple as that, and that's P-A-N-I. And I also have a podcast. It's a little different than this. It's psychology based.

It's like Jordan Peterson level. Think, think of him. I can only wish to be on his level, but yeah. No, he's horrible. I love him. He's daddy. He's daddy. All right. Thank horrible. I love him. He's daddy. He's daddy. All right, thank you.

Goodbye, everybody. Bye, everyone. I have to go to the bathroom. It's so bad. Go. Take it. Take it. Take it.

Take it. Take it. Take it. Take it. Take it. Take it. Ready. You can do it! You can do it! Ready!